Written for @subeddieweek, day two.
A Firm Touch
Prompt: First Time | Word Count: 1912 | Rating: E | CW: Reference to Past Recreational Drug Use | Tags: First Time, Established Relationship, Being Restrained, Light Praise Kink, A Bit of Subspace, Insecure Eddie, Virgin Eddie, Service Top Steve, Working Out The Kinks (Literally), Boys in Love, Just Trying to Figure Themselves Out
Eddie squirms away from Steve's grasp, again, another night fucking ruined and Steve sighs in frustration. Running his hand through his hair. He's disheveled, and Eddie wants…but he can't. It's not gonna work.
This is never gonna work, and he doesn't know why he thought it might. He just wanted it to, so goddamn bad.
The knot in Eddie's stomach grows, because he knows that Steve is getting frustrated. Not by the lack of sex, Eddie doesn't think, but more by the lack of understanding of why they aren't having sex. Eddie's been trying, then shying away, stalling and Steve's been patient, but Eddie knows he's running out of runway.
He's being a fucking cocktease, he's pretty sure, though that wasn't the intent.
"Eddie…" Steve trails off, "what? What is it this time?" he asks, hands finding his hips. The question comes across harsher than his voice actually sounds, but he's staring at Eddie in a way Eddie hates. He doesn't want to be looked at, stared at, perceived, known.
Eddie shrugs, and Steve lets out a breath that's pure annoyance. Like something he'd aim at the kids when they are fraying his nerves. Eddie doesn't want that sound pointed in his direction, it makes him feel horrible. Worthless.
Finally, Steve speaks again, "I just. I can't read your signals. They're all over the fucking place. Do you not want this? Or not with me? What? Just, what? Tell me," Steve pleads, and it's tinged with self-doubt, and maybe a little anger, and it makes Eddie withdraw further. Steve's got his own baggage, and Eddie knows it. But Eddie can't just say these things, can't ask for them.
So, Eddie clams up.
Because the other option is to jump right in, ready for a full fight. And he doesn't want to do that, so he just stays silent.
"Okay, I'll go," Steve says, and Eddie doesn't want him to go. But he doesn't know how to get him to stay.
"Don't go," Eddie says, barely audible, squeezing his hands into fists so hard that his short nails are digging into his palms.
"Then tell me, and I'll do whatever you want," Steve says, soft, worried. Begging a little. "I can't keep guessing wrong. It's killing me."
"I'm just not built like you, Harrington," Eddie finally says. Hoping that will end the discussion for one more night. Maybe Steve will still stay, and give Eddie a little more time to figure his shit out.
"What do you mean by that?" Steve asks, his brow furrowed, as he's folding his hands in his lap.
"Nothing."
"It's not nothing," Steve answers, "obviously."
Eddie is annoyed, frustrated. But he knows he's not gonna get anywhere with soft, sweet Steve Harrington running his hands all over him, like he's made of glass. Been there, done that. And it never ends in anything other than in frustration. There's something broken in him, and Steve would never understand that.
"Eddie, I-"
"You don't want me. You don't want what I want. What I need."
"What do you need, Eddie?" Steve asks, putting his hands on Eddie's arms, gently.
Eddie's exhausted, and he finally snaps, "I need you to hold me down. I need you to handcuff me and…" he trails off when he sees Steve's face. "I need a firm touch. A firm hand. To get off."
"Oh," Steve says, soft and shocked. Disgusted, probably.
Eddie looks down.
And then Steve's big, warm hand is on his thigh. Pressing down. Firmly.
"I can't, like, hit you," Steve says, face way too earnest.
"I don't need you to hit me," Eddie says with a small smile. He wouldn't be opposed, but if Steve won't get off on it, there's no way.
"But I can be firm. Well, I can try. I want to try."
Of course he does, because Steve Harrington always jumps in with both feet. Eddie's seen it in action. He just never expected to see it here, in the bedroom. He just thought he'd be able to get over it, whatever hang up he has, but it hasn't happened.
"Okay, Steve, you can try. If you don't like it, you say so."
"It's you," Steve says with a grin, "I think I'll like it just fine."
Eddie just smiles at him, embarrassed, but hopeful.
"Tell me what you like, what your previous sexual partners have done for you that worked," Steve says, like he's ready to take mental notes.
Eddie laughs, shaking his head, "No previous sexual partners. But I'm flattered that you think that's a possibility."
"Then how do you know…?" Steve trails off.
"I still know how I feel. I know how I get off, alone," Eddie answers.
And that…how, is not very easy, never has been. At least not alone.
"Of course. Of course you do," Steve says, like he should have known that. Eddie doesn't think that's a thing that most guys ever contemplate. Eddie imagines Steve can get off easily, without even thinking about it.
A few quick tugs, thinking about a pretty girl, or a cute guy, and that's all it takes. Eddie wishes it were that simple. He's trying to not feel embarrassed. It's Steve, and he's gotten used to the fact that he can tell Steve anything.
And if he wants this to work, and he does, then this conversation has to happen.
"Okay, where do we start?" Steve asks, sounding chipper, and ready to go. To act. Now that they've got even a hint of a plan. Eddie cannot believe how brave he is. He's a take-charge kinda guy, maybe this will come naturally to him.
Eddie knows asking Steve to start with handcuffs is crazy, and he's never even been in them before, couldn't do it on his own, and as much as he wants to be, that's for later. Hopefully. Someday, maybe. So, he just lays face down on the bed.
"Can you just…hold me down, maybe? Restrain me? With your hands?" Eddie asks.
"Yes," Steve says, like he's one-hundred percent certain that's something he can do, and then rolls him over, with a confidence that really works on Eddie.
Steve's got big hands, hands Eddie has fantasized about on more than one occasion.
And he grabs both of Eddie's wrists in one of his, and pins them above Eddie's head, pressing them into the pillow.
They aren't even undressed, but Steve crawls on top of him. Sitting on his thighs.
"This good?" Steve asks, and Eddie nods. It's good.
He's clearly having to stretch to hold Eddie like that, so Eddie isn't surprised when Steve scoots up his body, until he's off his thighs, until they are crotch to crotch, and Steve doesn't shy away from that. He just pushes down against him, as he presses on his wrists even harder now that he has a better angle.
Steve's hard, and Eddie still isn't. Maybe this won't work. Maybe he's not meant to have anything as good as Steve.
But Steve keeps grinding down, over and over, as he squeezes Eddie's wrists. Then, Steve scoots up further, his hard cock pressing into Eddie's belly as Steve leans over him, his chest right over Eddie's face, and Eddie feels boxed in, Steve's shirt hanging down, brushing against his nose. The scent of Steve flooding Eddie's nostrils with every movement Steve's body makes. Eddie feels hidden. Secure. Safe. And he closes his eyes and just feels it all, fully.
Enjoys.
When Steve shifts again, Eddie realizes he's hard. He doesn't know when that happened, but it feels so good. Steve is still rutting against him, and the pressure of him holding him to the bed feels like it's dug a hook into Eddie's center, and now there's an anchor pulling him down into the most amazing place he's ever been.
He feels drunk. He feels like he's taken the perfect amount of K, and now he's gently slipping into a hole.
Steve's not really doing much of anything, Eddie knows it's simple, but whatever Steve is doing is perfect. It's working.
Then, Steve leans forward, putting more weight on Eddie's wrists, holding them in place as he nearly lays on top of Eddie fully. Leaning most of his weight into it. Bringing them back together, hard cock pressed to hard cock. Still rolling his hips, grinding against him in slow, deliberate circles.
And even as Steve pushes all the air out of his lungs, Eddie feels like he can breathe, finally.
Steve's heavier than he looks, and Eddie is lost in the security he feels being under Steve.
He never even knew to dream about this, but here it is, his wildest dreams coming true at the hands of Steve Harrington.
"You feel so good under me," Steve says close to Eddie's ear, "you're being so good. Getting hard, just for me."
Eddie moans.
"That's good," Steve says again, "are you ready for me to let you go? Do you want me to touch you?"
Eddie shakes his head no, then makes his request, "Lay on me."
And Steve lowers his whole body to Eddie's, pressing him into the mattress. Chest to chest, crotch to crotch. Eddie can feel every point of contact, every point of pressure, and it's good. So good.
His wrists are still tight in Steve's grasp, but now he feels like his whole body is being held in the same way. Safe. Secure.
Steve rolls his hips, one more time, and Eddie attempts to lift up his hips, tries to get his ass off the bed, but he can't, and he comes in his jeans. Steve following him over the edge.
Tears leak out of Eddie's eyes, and his breathing is shallow with Steve on top of him, but he's happy, and relieved, and kind of boneless. Steve finally shifts so he can hold Eddie's wrists in one hand instead of two, lighter now, and brushes the fingers of his open hand against Eddie's cheek. Face near Eddie's, grounding him.
"Whenever you're ready, tell me what you need. What to do," Steve whispers, and Eddie nods.
Eddie finally felt ready for Steve to let him go, so Steve's shifted so he's laying beside him, not on him, kissing his face, his neck, taking care of him like he always does. Just in a new way now. When Eddie pictured submitting, in the abstract, he was expecting punishment. Pain. To be used, and probably discarded. Thought that's what he wanted. Rough, hard, mean. He thought he needed to be hurt, or tortured, just a little.
And maybe he still does.
But Steve Harrington is none of those things, and his style of taking control isn't either. Steve's a take-charge kind of guy, but there's a softness there that Eddie never wants to see go away, honestly.
"Was that okay?" Steve asks, and he looks so fucking nervous.
"More than," Eddie says, looking right in his eyes, "thank you."
"So, the handcuffs?" Steve asks, hint of a grin pulling at his lip.
"Wishful thinking," Eddie admits. Then raises his eyebrows, "Why? You interested?"
"For sure. Can we ease into it?" Steve asks, wrapping his arm around Eddie's waist, holding him tight, still so tight, and Eddie's sure he'll be asleep in minutes, feeling this comfortable.
This secure.
This safe.
This loved.
"Definitely," Eddie says, and closes his eyes, turning his face towards Steve's, nuzzling into him. Letting himself be held, not only down, but close.
If you want to write your own, or see more entries for this challenge, pop on over to @subeddieweek and follow along with the fun! 🖤
Notes: It was harder to write a first time (for both!) and have them have super defined roles. They're figuring their shit out. Together. And I like think Service Top Steve can grow into Pleasure Dom Steve, but not right out of the gate.
137 notes
·
View notes
Hah, thanks @beansthekid for giving me a chance to ramble a bit more!
I think there are many different and equally valid ways to interpret Eddie’s relationship with the Corroded Coffin crew; we really do not get very much canon material at all, which means it’s all very open to interpretation. However, I personally tend to read them as friendly acquaintances more than friends, because Eddie doesn't seem to treat them with any true closeness.
In the few scenes they share, Eddie sort of treats them like undifferentiated sidekicks/minions/audience. He seems basically fond of them, and I don't think his attitude comes from any sort of disrespect or dislike. Rather, I think it’s more about Eddie’s own comfort level: in general, I read Eddie as very skittish about relationships. He likes to keep people at a certain remove, and he likes to be in control of that distance.
We don't see him confiding in anyone or being intentionally vulnerable...right up until Steve and "guess I got a little jealous." Even with Chrissy, though he was definitely trying to present himself as friendly and harmless, he was absolutely putting on a little performance the entire time. He was taking on an entertainer role. He's willing to be seen as ridiculous, because that's the class-clown side of him, but it's not the same thing as letting down his guard. People laughing at him for his antics can't hurt him, at this point. Admitting he's fond enough of Dustin to make that a weakness, and being honest about feeling inadequate—that is vulnerability.
I do think it's plausible that that little jealousy confession was prompted in part by guilt over the whole broken-bottle thing. To be clear, I don't think Eddie's boatshed reaction was wildly out of line; at that point, he had zero information/context that would lead him to conclude that anyone out looking for him was on his side, much less Steve Harrington.
He was also scared out of his mind and literally shaking with adrenaline and fear, but he still didn’t actually hurt anyone. He could have shanked Steve and made a run for it, but I read him as someone who fundamentally does not want to hurt or scare people for real. He wants to make them uncomfortable, sure—or at the very least he doesn’t really care if they’re made uncomfortable by how he looks and acts. But actually being the villain of a story? That doesn’t fit with his values or his self-image.
So it would make sense if afterwards, he felt an outsized and misplaced sense of guilt about that little encounter, and let that spur him to offer up a little bit of honesty. It’s an intimacy he doesn’t extend to anyone else in the entire show.
I mean—hell, I am fully fixated on this little exchange:
Nancy: Hey, it’s Nancy.
Eddie: Wheeler, hey!
It would be way, way more natural to mirror her intro and call her Nancy, but instead he does this weird surname thing (and continues to call her by her surname) despite the fact that he already knows another Wheeler who is presumably also potentially tuned in. Why on earth would he do this. There are so many siblings in the group. The only way I can make sense of it is as a distancing mechanism that he leans on.
By the end, he does start addressing some people by their first names, some of the time. I haven’t done a full accounting, but I’m pretty sure it’s mostly just Dustin and Steve (not counting the “this is for you, Chrissy” moment).
But back to the Corroded Coffin lads: the biggest tell, for me, is that they had band practice without him. They knew he was missing, and either they knew he’d be a suspect/in trouble or they didn’t know him well enough to recognize his trailer on the news. They’re just kids, so it’s fairly reasonable that they wouldn’t be trying to take any action to find/help Eddie, but it seems unbearably callous that they’d just be having a normal band practice. I still don’t really know how to fold that into my understanding of their dynamics, but one possible interpretation is that they aren’t used to thinking of him as someone who ever really gets hurt, so they figure it’ll all just blow over somehow.
Eddie’s obviously taken on a leadership position in their little group. He’s the DM, he runs the show. But we don’t have a sense that he’s got a second-in-command or a trusted advisor that he confides in, much less someone he sees as a true peer in a give-and-take way.
Again, I don’t think any of this means he doesn’t like the Corroded Coffin boys. On the contrary, I think he probably cares about them very much in the same way he loves Dustin. My read on Eddie is that he sees himself as a protector who is in some way responsible for them and their well-being, cultivating a sense of interdependent community that he doesn’t really get to partake in. His sense of self-worth lies in his ability to be a shield, standing between his lost little sheep and the wolves of Hawkins. He draws fire and takes the hits, and that’s a very lonely position to be in.
And then…Steve Harrington.
231 notes
·
View notes