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Bitter Pill to Swallow

Chapter 25 (Chapter Masterlist)

Thank you as always to @tvserie-s-world for her lovely screencaps

A very special shoutout to @wecomrades for offering to be my editor❤️ Your time and skills are appreciated more than you'll ever know. This one's dedicated to you 💕

"Well, why don't you fire on them when you see them, commander?"

"Because, when we fire on them, they just fire back. Blimey, it was a nightmare the other day."

Valerie had to turn away and stifle a laugh when she saw the look of horrified disbelief on Dick's face. The 506th had been moved to Driel, relieving the British unit who'd been stationed by the riverbanks. Dick had brought Valerie and Lipton to talk to the British Commander and get an idea of what to expect.

"I see. Well, thank you for the intel, commander," Dick replied tersely. "Now, we'd better go and get ourselves set up on the bank."

"Godspeed to you, chaps," the British Commander saluted them as they left.

Dick was shaking his head in disapproval as they walked away, and Valerie could contain her laughter no longer. Dick tutted in disapproval as it bubbled out of her.

"It's not funny, Val," Dick admonished. "They've been way too relaxed in their approach to Holland since before we even got here, and it's cost us dearly."

"I know, Dick, I know. But you gotta admit, it's pretty laughable that they don't fire on the Germans because they fire back when they do. They do realise it's a war they signed up for, not a tea party, right?"

"You do have to laugh at how ridiculous it is," Lipton agreed, "but this whole thing is shaping up to be a real shitshow. I can't wait to get the hell outta Holland, and I know the rest of the men feel the same."

"Well, for now we're stuck here," Dick sighed. "We just have to make the best of it and try to push through to Arnhem. Easy is being kept on the right flank, for now. The line bends at an acute angle there, so Moose will only be able to have two platoons on the line and one in reserve. Make sure he's aware of that."

"Don't worry, Dick, Easy can handle it," Valerie assured him. "Ain't that right, Lip?"

"Absolutely," he agreed. "And we won't be too scared to fire across the river either."

Dick huffed out a small laugh at that, but his face quickly returned to the strained look Valerie had seen him sporting more often than not in the last few weeks. Desk work didn't suit him, and it was plain to be seen to anyone who knew him. She'd seen him peering out his office window when they'd been celebrating the success of Operation Pegasus. She'd been tempted to go up and check on him, but after the awkward way they'd ended things the night before, she'd thought better of it.

"Anyway, we won't get anything useful done standing around here," Dick sighed, backing away. "I need to find Nix, and you need to get yourselves set up on the line. Make sure to give 'em hell."

-----------

"I swear, if I don't get out of this foxhole, I'm gonna lose it."

"Yeah, and if I hear Arnhem Annie telling me to cross the river one more time, I'm gonna lose it."

The weather had been far from ideal the moment they'd set up in Driel. It had barely stopped raining for more than a few hours, and they were confined to their foxholes during daylight hours because the Germans had the high ground across the river. They were cold, wet, hungry, and morale was starting to wane. Valerie had taken to crawling between the foxholes, both to keep the boys' spirits up and to make sure they were alright. That was how she'd found herself tucked up between Gordon and Mellet one rainy afternoon.

"Look on the brightside, boys," Valerie chuckled, "at least they're playing American music for us in between all those surrender messages. And the supply guys have started bringing Stars and Stripes for us. We've got a regular home from home set up over here."

"Oh, yeah," Gordon snorted, "If it weren't for all the rain, we could almost pretend it was a holiday."

"Could be worse, I suppose," Mellet chimed in. "We could be snowed under. Now, that would be a nightmare."

"At least we'd be somewhat dry," Gordon groused. "I'd rather be cold and half dry than soaked to the skin in a mucky foxhole."

"Alright, I've had just about enough of you two complanin','' Valerie sighed, pulling herself over the lip of the foxhole and crouching down. "Try to stay positive boys. I know it's hard out here, but we're not the toughest damn company in the battalion for nothing."

As Valerie got back to the CP, she was stopped in her tracks by Heffron.

"Lieutenant Landry, ma'am," Heffron started, "Lieutenant Heyliger sent me to find you. He wants you back at Easy CP, quick as you can, ma'am."

Valerie thanked him and sent him back to his foxhole, before making her way to find Heyliger. She moved quickly, worried that there was something wrong. It wasn't completely out of the ordinary to be called to CP, but they didn't make a habit of calling her unless it was urgent.

"I'm here, what's happenin'? Is everythin' alright?" She called, roughly shoving the tarp door aside as she entered the CP. Heyliger was waiting for her inside, his arms crossed.

"Yeah Valerie, everything's fine, don't worry." Heyliger assured her. "But, it's been noticed that you've been refusing hot meals and I'm worried about you. You need to eat, Valerie, to keep your strength up out there."

"Is that all this is?" She sighed, exasperated. "I'll eat with my boys when the third rotates back into reserve. Until then, I'm fine. It's not fair for me to come back for a feed, while the boys are out there with nothing but soggy rations. It ain't right."

"I know, it's not right," Heyliger agreed. "If I could find a way to get hot food out to all the men, I would. But I can't. I can only get it to my officers, and it's important you take it. We may be at an impasse now, but we don't know when they'll strike. When they do, the men need you at your best, and you can't be at your best if you're not eating enough."

Valerie knew he had a point, despite how much she disagreed with him. She'd been refusing meals for days while they'd been out on the line. She'd also been offering most of her rations to some of the hungrier looking replacements. Thankfully, Heyliger didn't seem to know that, or he'd chew her out good and proper for it. All in all, she was starving, but she was willing to stick it out with her platoon for as long as it took.

"Moose, I... "

"Don't argue with me, Valerie," he cut in, shaking his head at her. "I'm ordering you to battalion CP for a hot meal. For once in your life, don't be stubborn. Just go and do it."

She rolled her eyes in exasperation, but she knew he wouldn't let it go. "Fine, fine, I'm going," she grumbled, holding her hands up in defeat. "I don't think it's fair, but if you're really gonna order me to go then I have no other choice, do I."

"No, you don't. Now, get going."

Valerie left with a sigh, trudging reluctantly to the battalion CP. She had to admit to herself, the smell of the food wafting from the mess as she approached was mouth watering. She grabbed a large serving of spaghetti, and was just about to tuck in when Dick dropped into the seat across from her.

"About time you came to get a hot meal," he commented, disapproval evident in his tone. "I haven't seen you around here once since we dug in."

"You have too much time on your hands, if you're keeping track of who comes and goes for dinner, Dick," she quipped, grinning as his cheeks turned red.

"Well... I just... I don't like the idea of you starving yourself out there on the front line. You need to keep your strength up out there," he stuttered, the pink stain on his cheeks deepening.

"I'm fine, Dick. There's no need to worry yourself over me," she assured, shaking her head. "And, my point still stands. They clearly need to give you more paperwork if you're able to track who comes and goes from the mess hall."

"Oh, paperwork is the one thing I'm not lacking in," he grumbled. Valerie paused, taking a moment to survey him. He had a furrow between his brows that seemed to have made permanent residence there lately, and his fingers were tapping an incessant rhythm on the table. In all the time Valerie had known Dick, she was sure she'd never seen him fidget.

"Is everythin' alright, Dick?" She asked gently. "You haven't really been yourself since you moved up to battalion."

"I'm fine... it's... fine," he sighed. "It's just... not what I expected it to be like."

"Well, yeah, I'm sure there's less action, but... "

"There's no action to speak of," he interrupted, shaking his head morosely. "All I do is administrative work. I miss being out there with you, making decisions and getting involved. It feels less like a promotion and more like a punishment at this point."

Valerie nodded, her eyes softening in sympathy. Dick had been in the thick of everything since Toccoa, aside from his brief stint with a clipboard back in Aldbourne. He was good at making quick decisions, and he always led from the front. She'd seen that back at Brecourt, and at the Island too. He enjoyed the satisfaction of a well executed plan, and she could see how being deprived of all that would start to wear him down.

"I get that," she agreed. "You get used to the adrenaline of bein' on the front line every day, and when that's suddenly not there anymore it can take some gettin' used to. Give it time, Dick, you'll adjust."

"Thanks, Val," he replied gratefully, his lips tilting up slightly at the corner. "It's nice to talk to someone who actually understands. Most wouldn't."

"Well," she chuckled, "I'm not most."

"No, you certainly are not."

Valerie's heart started to pound erratically from the fond look he was giving her. Her thoughts inadvertently flitted back to that moment in his office, where he'd given her a similar look and she'd been sure he was going to kiss her. Her palms clammed up as the memory resurfaced, and she could feel the heat rising up her neck.

"Well, on the brightside," she said after a beat, "at least you get to spend plenty of time with Nix."

"Yeah," Dick laughed, looking away from her, "I'm not sure yet if that's a blessing or a curse."

----------

Valerie was discussing movements with Welsh at the Easy CP when they heard the gunshot pierce through the silence of the night. Their heads snapped up in unison, and they shared a concerned look.

"Jesus, Harry, that sounded close," Valerie breathed shakily. "They've hardly decided to break the stand-off with an ambush, have they?"

"Doesn't sound like it," Harry disagreed, "there was only one shot. But, Dick and Moose said they were coming down here to do an inspection, so we better go and make sure they're not in trouble."

Valerie grabbed her rifle and swung it over her shoulder, before following Welsh out into the night. As they jogged down the narrow path, they started to hear a commotion up ahead of them. They slowed, pulling their rifles into their hands and creeping forward cautiously. The shadows started to solidify as they got closer to the noise, and it was clear that there was no enemy ambush going on.

"Dick, Moose, is that you?" Welsh murmured, swinging his rifle back onto his shoulder as they approached the pair of shadows.

"Yeah, Harry, it's us. Moose is down, some jumpy private shot him because he forgot the passphrase," Dick called back.

"Jesus, is he bad?" Valerie asked, closing the distance between them and falling to her knees beside Dick.

"His shoulder is a clean wound, but his calf is pretty cut up," Dick huffed. "We need to get him back to battalion quick, give him the best chance we can of making it."

"We gotta give him morphine, he's in agony," Welsh said as he started wrapping bandages around Heyliger's calf. "He won't make it back to battalion unless we give him some morphine to dull the pain."

Everything after that was a blur, and they were all so frantic in trying to save Heyliger that they became erratic in their actions. Valerie left Dick and Welsh as they picked Moose up to carry him, running ahead to call an ambulance and a medic.

"Gene, there's an emergency," she called loudly as she ran into the med-bay. Roe dropped the bandages he'd been carrying and ran straight over to her, worry evident in his eyes.

"What's happened, are you alright?" He asked, giving her a frantic once over.

"I'm fine, it's Moose," she replied, "he's been shot in the shoulder and the calf. His calf is pretty bad, and he's lost a lot of blood. Dick and Harry are carrying him up now but he'll need an ambulance to be evacuated."

Roe sprang into action without another word. He called for the ambulance driver to get ready to go, then went to gather the supplies he'd need for the journey. Valerie followed close behind him as he rushed out to the ambulance and jumped into the back.

"Tell the driver where they are, chérie, we'll meet them halfway. We gotta give him the best chance we can."

Valerie and Roe sat in anxious silence as the driver sped down the path. She was so caught up in her worry for Moose that she jerked violently against the back door of the ambulance when the driver stopped suddenly. Roe pushed past her and opened the door quickly, turning and pulling the stretcher out with him. Valerie jumped out behind him, searching to see where she could step in to help.

"Valerie said he's lost a lot of blood," Roe said as he grabbed Heyliger and helped the others put him on the stretcher. "You did the right thing bandaging him up to stem the blood flow. Have you given him morphine? I don't see any syringes, where are they?"

"Uh... Jesus, I... I'm not sure," Welsh stuttered.

"Could have been two or three, we didn't... "

"Two or three?" Roe exclaimed, his nostrils flaring. "Jesus, you could've goddamn killed him. You'll be lucky if he survives as it is after that. What were you thinkin'?"

"We didn't know what to do, he was in so much pain, we... " Dick said frantically

"Well, you are grown ups! You are officers, you oughta know!" Roe shouted, glaring at them as he loaded Heyliger into the ambulance and slammed the doors closed. Valerie, Dick, and Welsh watched in astonishment as the ambulance sped up and left them there, the silence echoing in the night around them. She had never seen Roe get that angry, not in all the years she had known him.

"He's right," Dick croaked, "it was so stupid to give him that much morphine. But he was in agony, and I just... "

"It's alright, Dick," Valerie assured, placing a comforting hand on his arm. "You did your best, given the circumstances and the shock."

"It's not alright," he groaned, shaking his head in disappointment. "We could have killed him with a dose that high. I should have kept my head and handled it better."

"It's not your fault, Dick, we just panicked," Welsh sighed sadly.

"He's gonna make it," Valerie assured as confidently as she could. "Gene will take good care of him on the way to the aid station."

"If he even makes it to the aid station," Dick grumbled. "It'll be a miracle if he does."

"Dick, don't be... "

"You two better get back to Easy, tell them they've lost another CO," he cut in tersely, resentment clear in his voice and demeanour. "I'll probably need to write a report on this, so I better get back. I'll see you both tomorrow."

Valerie watched him go, his usual aura of self assurance replaced by sagging shoulders and clenched fists. If anything happened to Heyliger, he would blame himself. He always took it hard when he lost men under his command, and this would be no different. Part of her wanted to follow him, to make him see that it wasn't his fault and he'd done his best. She knew she shouldn't, though, that he'd probably prefer some time alone to process the whole ordeal.

"C'mon Val, we better head back," Welsh said quietly, breaking her from her thoughts. She took one last glance at Dick's retreating frame before turning and heading back to the Easy CP with Welsh, neither of them uttering another word.

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