hollifo - Tumblr blog

[hollifo]

"you do not owe friends instant responses to every social message, and anxiety over not receiving the same is something for the anxious person to work on, not your responsibility to totally change for"

AND

"you have to put some effort into friendships, which can include open communication with your friends about how to make both of you comfortable re: messaging. expecting other people to do ALL of the work ALL of the time, in terms of getting in touch and carrying on the conversation, may make them feel ignored and/or and leave"

are ideas that can and should coexist

[hollifo]

Summoning ancient horrors to enact vengeance on your bullies ✨just girly things✨☺️

I grew up near Old Alton Bridge - this is my stinky little tribute to Goatman/Ryan/Shane’s stinky little bridge

[hollifo]

Infesting with the girlies 🥰

[hollifo]

6000 years of fraternising ❤️ who’s excited for s2?

[hollifo]

They don’t know what’s going on but they’re here to help (same) 🔮✨

Catch this print on patreon this month!

[hollifo]

Wait until you learn about the tradition of "accidentally" beheading a child for good weather on your wedding

My mom sent me a tiny man that I have to bury in the ground. Catholicism is wild

[hollifo]

MASKING MYTHS BUSTED: “Masking = Acting NT.”

FALSE.

Autistic masking does not necessarily mean “pretending to be allistic/neurotypical," although you’d definitely be forgiven for thinking it does.

Non-autistic researchers have been referring to it as “camouflaging” for years, framing it as an intentional choice to suppress autistic traits and replace them with allistic ones in order to “blend in.” Doing an internet search on the term will return several similar results.

But now, Autistic researchers are in the game, and their take is much more nuanced and comprehensive than that. (Funny how that happens, isn’t it?)

They’ve found that:

- It CAN be intentional but is often subconscious and involuntary 

- It is a protective response to trauma and feeling unsafe 

- It is often about suppressing more than just autistic traits 

- It is about identity management and being able to predict how people will treat you, not just “blending in”

Some people will lean into being “the bad kid” because they know that’s what people expect of them. Some people will even act “more autistic” because they know that’s what people expect of them. Others still will do things to attract attention in controllable, more “acceptable” ways to avoid attracting attention in unsafe, more stigmatizing ways. Not because they WANT to be that way, but because it lets them predict people’s responses better, which feels safer.

Also, there are Autistic people who can’t “pass” for non-autistic no matter how hard they try. That doesn’t mean they’re not masking. They may actually be working hard to suppress A LOT, they just can’t do everything to neuronormative standards.

None of these people will be accused of “blending in,” yet they are still masking their hearts out. When we assume they are not, we miss all the harm that masking is causing them. But they are suppressing themselves and suffering the consequences of that just as much as any Autistic person whose mask successfully says, “Hey, I’m just like you!”

(For more on this, please see the work of Dr. Amy Pearson and Kieran Rose.)

[hollifo]

In my homewrecker rat era 😘 Happy Valentine’s Day!

[hollifo]

Sunrise, Parabellum.

[hollifo]

gumshoe fanart (again!!!)

[hollifo]

totk first day today!!! im so happy. i'll never let you guys forget the best ganon ever

[hollifo]

👀 Investigating

[hollifo]

Books

[hollifo]

Got a terf in my sideblog and the reply is not worth deigning with a response but the pinned post?

This? This is a trap. This is concern baiting. Be very sure that shit like this is not in your best interest and does not care about you. The goal of rhetoric like this is conversion.

You’ll be welcomed and asked to ignore transphobia. You will be asked to side with transphobes at the expense of trans women. Eventually, you’ll be asked to see that, hey, maybe you transitioned to escape how terrible it is to be a woman?

This may seem obviously a trap but I see people every day buy into this. People like this do not care about you! They want to “rescue” you and don’t let them convince you otherwise.

[hollifo]

People used to comment on web comics.

People used to comment on fanfiction.

People used to comment on fanart.

People used to comment on OCs.

I hate "content" culture.

I hate "consuming content" and scrolling immediately to the next thing.

People used to be excited about the art that other people created.

People used to want to share that excitement with creators.

I hate this future.

[hollifo]

This one felt fitting

[hollifo]

Grumble grumble…