howtohuman

[howtohuman]

i read this and it hits. deep within, it hits and it swelters and it pains because the same questions exist. and, i, too, don't have answers. but i look further and this is a poem. it's a poem that doesn't need poetry, it's a poem that doesn't need structure, doesn't need rhyme or metre. it's a poem. look at it. it's there.

but...it *is* poetry. it has structure. and rhythm. and metre. every word perfectly chosen. hidden in the wails, there is thought and care and skill.

and the wound deepens. it burns. it aches. an ugly emotion festers. i want to let go. but i can't. i claw and wail for something, just one thing to hold close to me to say, "this is mine. *at least* this is mine."

but there isn't. i have nothing. my fingers close on empty air and all that's left is...nothing. my limbs have fallen off and i sink to the bottom. the shore doesn't exist. the wound gets deeper. and i still am nothing.

and i just waste it; this life of mine. hand over hand. the days slip in between each other and nestle in ugly spurs. what did you do today? how many hours have i spent, neither truly here nor truly there. just frozen. wanting desperately to begin anything. get up and shower or work out or drink water or make a change or dance along or be a person - just get up. my insides, coating the edges of blank atrophy. how hard can it truly be? people do this every day. they make their life every day. why can't i? why am i stuck here? why am i stuck like this, with only my heart and no boat? the shifting warning - you need to start swimming, you can't always just float. but what else, when my limbs don't move and there's no sound for the breach of my throat? what else, and where am i going? what shore am i supposed to even be wading out for? nothing and nothing and nothing. the swinging, empty bridge, and no railing.

[howtohuman]

"just be yourself!" i never figured out who that is, though. i was supposed to know by now, right? like, other people my age do know. but i keep showing up to life and trying to find whatever "me" exists. that person is always disappearing at the last second, turns into wisp. i wish someone would just give me instructions. point to a horizon. a map. some kind of sign that says: go be this.

[howtohuman]

bet it feels so good to wallow, cry, and drown yourself in alcohol as you helplessly watch your life slip away from your own hands

[howtohuman]

[howtohuman]

despite my best wishes, i have woken up another day

[howtohuman]

I cannot believe there's absolutely no way to watch free shows and movies anymore, there are too many paid streaming platforms and pirating websites have viruses and ads preventing you from watching it uninterrupted((.)) id rather follow the rules and purchase media moving forward because it is too inconvenient. Seriously, free and no ads or viruses with 1080p streaming is DEAD.

[howtohuman]

i dont have a cat

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[howtohuman]

cat walked across the keyboard sorry

khtujhddsrnug:5)!_£48)/_75£'-:£4cgrjncdjkonngtdcb

[howtohuman]

khtujhddsrnug:5)!_£48)/_75£'-:£4cgrjncdjkonngtdcb

[howtohuman]

David Tennant in interviews is just a Nice Scottish Man and then every director he works with goes you are a SLUT!!! And you are SO SO SAD!!

[howtohuman]

Just finished hamlet & had to share THIS

[howtohuman]

this is honest to god what we should all feel like at all times

[howtohuman]

It is generally a popular trope that when you start dating someone, the world seems brighter and better and happier. I always believed that that was because this person makes you happy and so, that happiness spreads. But having recently entered my first relationship with a beautiful person, I have come to refine that theory a bit.

I do see the world a brighter place, but mine own feelings are not entirely to blame. In her beauty evermore, my love has given me the ability to look upon the world through her. Through her, I can see the world differently.

I used to think nothing of bats was I to come upon one, but now I look at one and it makes me warm as I am reminded that she likes bats. Not a thought would bother me if I would look at a little bug flying around, now I take extra care, for I realize how much she cares about them. Coming upon a poem, I would smile at it and forget, now I remember it and find pieces of her embedded deep within.

She has made the world a brighter place for me, not because she makes me happy, but because she has made me complete. Not because I hated life prior, but because she has allowed me to see it more colorful. Her own life runs deep within me and I can't help but look for pieces of her wherever I go. And I believe that to be love at its truest.

[howtohuman]

he frew up

[howtohuman]

[howtohuman]

Thought creeps in my mind

Welcome it with open arms

Carbonated milk

[howtohuman]

Put Lizzie in a box, and the box in the ground and use that money to help your ppl, jesus fucking christ

For Phillip”s funeral it cost £12 million. And that was during Covid so it was “downgraded” at lot. Now imagine what they are gonna spend on the bloody Queen’s and not it be downgraded? And not only a funeral but a coronation too for Charles. The people of the UK are going through a crisis right now. Many can’t afford the heating bill or food.