like there comes a point where you think something is fundamentally wrong with you. and then it turns out it’s just Friday and you haven’t washed your hair in three days and maybe you’re also just a little lonely and the combination of all three of those things is whittling a hole into your chest every time you breathe. but also the sun’s up. and you’ve survived everything so far, so you’ll survive this too, even if it hurts, even if you have to survive it many times.
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This goes out to all my fellow abuse survivors who struggle with “basic things” now that you’re an adult.
You haven’t failed. You aren’t stupid. A lot of these things were things you should have been taught in a nurturing environment and it’s not your fault you weren’t given that.
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when i was a teenager it felt very revolutionary to be cruel to myself. like some kind of slow passive protest against how much everything hurt. i starved myself of sleep and food and tenderness because it felt right. it felt sharp and angry and radical and i wanted to be those things. adulthood is the realisation that the world is already working to cut into you well before you learn how to do it yourself. caring for yourself and others is the real protest
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Be good to you. Be good to others.❤️
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sometimes it’s better refrain from deep introspection and allow yourself to just be.
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Credit to Janellsilver on Instagram
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