intheclowncar - Tumblr blog

[intheclowncar]

I don't like the way I act when I like someone at all.

[intheclowncar]

My dose of setraline has been doubled! I now cannot sleep again ... yippee 😐

[intheclowncar]

I'm abandoning my hater ways! I'm a lover now! I love everything!

I love myself, I love how pretty and smart I am and I love being a girl! I love using "like" before literally every word in my sentences! I love pink and hello kitty! And sonic! And doraemon! I love all the little characters! I love my friends! I love Pistachios! I love loving things! I love chocolate! I love cleaning my room and I even love doing the dishes :3 I love having a job and I love studying! And I'm so excited to find more things to love <3

[intheclowncar]

"You're way too young to be showing all that skin" baby girl you're the one who let winx club raise your kids..

[intheclowncar]

15 minutes before alarm goes off: oh gotta take my meds soon

Alarm goes off: shut up >:( I already know

After turning alarm off: *immediately forgets to take meds*

[intheclowncar]

Today I have a headache which sucks but I'm having soup for dinner so hopefully that'll not only help with that but also prevent a bit of nausea while I eat because I typically don't eat that much soup (the past few nights I had been having stew which I eat a lot of 😋)

[intheclowncar]

There's a guy crawling around on the ground but I can't figure out how to attck downwards, I think I'll just leave him as a little friend :)

THE SCARIEST PART ABOUT THIS GAME ARE THE TANK CONTROLS

[intheclowncar]

THE SCARIEST PART ABOUT THIS GAME ARE THE TANK CONTROLS

[intheclowncar]

I've been on setraline for 3 days now and I do not feel good!

All of my limbs are weak which is a general symptom I get for doing literally anything I'm afraid of, I'm slightly nauseous constantly, especially when I try to eat and I always feel like I might throw up but I never do, on the bright side of that though I haven't lost my appetite :)

I'm struggling to fall asleep, am a lot more restless in my sleep (which I am anyway) and am struggling to stay asleep, I often wake up with a desperate need to start running or otherwise move in general (which did occasionally happen before, I think it's just because I don't really do much so my body isn't tired enough to sleep), on top of that I'm SO TIRED I was trying to sleep at like 8pm last night

My head feels very heavy and I'm struggling to get myself to start activities or tasks, like get out of bed or put my phone down, I feel almost as if I've slowed down but not really in a good way..

It's hard to say whether it's doing much for my anxiety at this point, my general anxiety comes in bursts with no specific trigger or cause, so that's something that would be difficult to notice stopping. And I haven't spoken to anyone outside of family/friends since being on it so I don't know if I'd still burst into tears at the thought of stringing together a sentence

I have noticed that I'm able to be significantly more vulnerable with the language I use, it could be because I'm also working on myself or maybe because I'm tired, but "I feel" or admitting to crying are things I wouldn't ever say a week ago, but when I typed them here I didn't get that wave of dread telling me I can't let anyone know that, which is so nice! If that keeps up regardless of whether it's all me or the meds I'll be able to grow into my own person without a desperate need to be seen in such a perfect way

My social anxiety is super severe so honestly I don't have high hopes about solving that? But lessening it would be absolutely wonderful

Also I take it at night? Idk if that was the best time,, like,, idk if it'll maybe wear off during the day because of that? But I figured it would be best for me because my schedule is super unreliable and it's the only time I'm guaranteed to be awake or not super busy.. idk I looked it up to see if that was ok and apparently that's what uou should do if it makes you nauseous so you're not throughout the day,,, but also maybe that's why my sleep is so bad?

Idk, in comparison to other people's experiences I really don't have it that bad and I am beyond grateful for that, but it isn't pleasant :p

[intheclowncar]

THE NANNY IS INVISIBLE ? MY BABIES ARE TELEPORTING AND FLOATING HELP???

[intheclowncar]

Cheerios with strawberries in Yoghurt please!

[intheclowncar]

CALL IT CLICHE BUT IF HE DOESNT SAY "Will you make me the happiest man alive" OR IF SHE DOESNT SAY "Will you make me the happiest woman I know" INSTEAD OF JUST "Will you marry me"

Say no! :3

[intheclowncar]

"Kids aren't kids anymore"

Do you mean,, when they were getting married at 15 orrrrr????

It's ALWAYS girls too. It's just blatant sexism. I grew up with barbies n shit,,, like obviously I liked fashion and makeup??? As did my older sister (the next generation up) and then before that it was my parents... who did the same stuff... and before that they were getting married so.. by that logic you are either jealous you didn't look pretty as a kid, or you're a pedophile.

[intheclowncar]

SCARY SCARY SCARY

[intheclowncar]

I'm rewriting the bible guys, im gonna keep it all the same but at the end it will say "ps. Thou shalt not enjoy pickles"

[intheclowncar]

This is pretty much how it is right?

[intheclowncar]

ITS 10PM AND IM STRUGGLING TO KEEP MY EYES OPEN, WHAT HAPPENED TO THE GIRL WHO DIDNT EVEN THINK ABOUT SLEEPING UNTIL 3AM!?