your writing is so yummy i need it in my veins
I love you too anon marry me
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Love your batfam fic!!!
Thanks man! â¤ď¸
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underlying bitterness
Summary: You were depressed. The family is quick to notice.Â
Tags: platonic!yandere!batfam x fem!reader, reader implied to be mentally ill, depression, coddling, isolation, etc (you know the drill)
Word count: 1.6k
Notes: temporarily back from the dead! decided to finish this since i had it collecting dust in my drafts LMAO---apologies for my lack of writing, i have several projects im combing through and school đ
The manor never really was quiet; there was always something going on.
The only time the quiet came was when they were out for patrol, or when everyone was asleepâbut even then, there always seemed to be a pervasive spirit of noise and life that, on a good day, didnât bother you.
But today was a bad one. Today, everything was an unbearable stretch of life, a near-constant torment of both mind and soul, leaving you incapacitated by your own head.Â
It was these days where the bearableâhell, even the niceâwas acidic on your gaunt body.Â
A knock on the door had you wearily raising your head.Â
A call of your name bounced through the door. The voice was bright and chirpy, downright dripping with honey. âYou okay in there? Can I come in?âÂ
Eleven minutes alone? New record.
You sighed. The question only had one answer.Â
âYes, and yes.âÂ
The door to your bedroom opened silently, barely a squeak from the hinges. Dick revealed himself with a giant dopey grin, Damian just a step behind him.Â
You didnât bother smiling. âHey.âÂ
âHi!â Bright as always, his movement carried an excitable sway, acting more like a kid than a 20-something bonafide detective/vigilante. There was something predatory about it, an inherent layer of manipulative intent with it that never left you at ease.Â
At least Damian was always himself, the deep-set frown never leaving his face in anyoneâs presence, including yours.Â
You wouldâve been inclined to like him had it not been for the palpable softness that eased the furrows of his brows.Â
Shifting under the heavy blankets, you pat the other side of the bed, the movement practiced and learned. Routine.Â
Damian was the one to take the invitation while Dick sat at the end of your side. He rarely sat there. You didnât care to decipher his intentions, merely regarding him with the same placidity as you had before.Â
âSo..?âÂ
âThe familyâs noticed youâve been off lately?âÂ
Ah.
You shifted some more, feeling the weight of their stares assess every micro-movement made. It wasnât subtle. This was an interrogation, not their self-indulgent visits that had you puking right after.Â
âIâm on my period,â you responded bluntly.Â
âYour cycles arenât during this time of month.â Dickâs voice was deceptively light.Â
"Hm, well, the female body works in mysterious ways.âÂ
âThen Iâm gonna go check the washroom garbage.â
The silence of your mind buzzed to life. âWhat?âÂ
âIâm gonna go check the washroom garbage.â He repeated, rising from the bed.Â
What the fuck.
You could let him go and find out for himself that you were, indeed, lying. However, you werenât in the mood to deal with the punishments that came with that...
...Though, regardless, you were going to be punished. Lyingâespecially to Dick of all peopleânever bode you well.Â
Really, maybe you just werenât in the mood to deal with the drama, the stormy face heâll don when he walks out the washroom after finding out the lie.Â
So you sighed tiredly, back sinking further into the thick pillow. âI lied.âÂ
Dickâs pleasant expression flickered. Damianâs stare deepened in its calculating weight.Â
Dick spoke slowly. âYou know what happens when you lie.âÂ
You sighed again. It bordered a scoff. âHurry up with it then.âÂ
The smile turned to a neutral line, though you knew he was feeling anything than neutral. Dick loathed lies, but he kept a calm voice. âWhyâve you been off lately?âÂ
âI lied, Dick. Arenât you supposed to do what you usually do? Neglect and all.â You were flippant. This was gonna make it worse, and at this point you knew better, you always tried to avoid this, but something was possessing you.Â
A will, or more accurately, a lack thereof.Â
âJust tell him,â Damian hissed.Â
You glanced at him, unimpressed. âNo.âÂ
Dick breathed slowly. âWhy?âÂ
âBecause youâll make me feel bad for it.âÂ
He blinked. Surprised.Â
Why was he surprised? Is this another manipulation tactic?Â
Probably. Why did you even bother trying to decipher his intentions? Their intentions?
âYouâll make it about you guys. How bad you guys feel. How you want the best for me.â You yawned. âIâm not in the mood to humor that. Pull that some other time, I just need to recuperate. Touch bases with my soul and all that hippie shit.â Your eyes fluttered shut for a moment. âOkay?âÂ
A pause thickened the tension in the air tenfold.Â
Then, it was Damian who spoke. âYouâre..?âÂ
âDepressed.â Dick finished, mild disbelief lacing his words. What stood out was the underlying offended tone the word wore.Â
You didnât bother responding, keeping your eyes shut, pulling the covers over your chin. It was only midday, but you were tired.Â
âWhy are you... âdepressedâ?â Damian was the one to speak, now with incredulity.Â
âWhy is the sky blue?â You muttered.Â
Cold fingers brushed your cheek, a colder voice poking through. âOpen your eyes when you talk.âÂ
You did as told, looking up at him from your curled position. âWhy are you depressed?â He repeated with a voice of iron.Â
âIt doesnât matter,â you responded. âNone of it does. Iâll be better soon. I just need you to give me space.âÂ
Another pause.Â
Then, uncharacteristically, Damian slipped away. He glanced over where Dick was.Â
Dick, even more uncharacteristically, nodded and slipped away, walking with Damian out the room.Â
In any other circumstance, your blood would run cold.Â
But, at that moment, you were thankful for the temporary relief.Â
-----
You hadnât thought youâd sleep, but you did, only to be awaken by Tim.Â
âDinnerâs ready.â He said, eyes burning into yours.Â
You grunted, tossing the sheets away. The cold raked your body. Getting off the bed, you glanced out the barred window.Â
Sunset.Â
How long did you sleep?Â
And how come they let you sleep for so long, undisturbed?Â
You didnât care to wonder. Blearily nodding to Tim, you tipped your head to the washroom. âIâm gonna clean up a little, give me aââ
âYou look fine, just come.â His hand, now wrapped tightly around your wrist, left no room for complaint.Â
Faintly sighing, you nodded again. He led you out the room and through the colder corridors of the manor, down several staircases and past various pillars and paintings youâre always surprised to see, as if you hadnât been housed in the manor for two-something years.Â
Two years.Â
730 days wasted here.Â
730 days, never to be recovered.Â
Your chest tightened, but your heart was empty.
Pushing the thought away, you blankly focused on the outstretched dining table youâd eaten countless meals on.Â
Tim said your name.Â
You look at him, confused.Â
âSit?âÂ
Oh. Right.Â
You slipped onto the chair, vaguely aware of your surroundings.Â
â...Thatâs my seat.âÂ
âSorry,â you moved to get up, but his hands pressed down on your shoulders.Â
âNo, itâs fine, Iâm just surprised. Thatâs all. Youâre usually pretty attentive.â
âSorry,â you repeated.Â
Tim didnât respond, opting to sit beside you.Â
You were vaguely aware of the rest of the family settling in their respective positionsâBruce sitting at the head on your left, Dick sitting across you with Damian to his right, and at the end of the table Jason settled with a tired huff.
What you were fully aware of however was how good the food. The aroma was thick and savory, leaving your mouth to waterÂ
Raising a fork, you dug into the food.Â
âHow was your day?â Bruce was the one to break the silence, and you notice him looking at you.Â
âIt was good,â you mumbled around the food.Â
A silence cradled the room for a moment, the clanks of silverware mute.Â
âWas it?â
âYeah.âÂ
âAre you sure?âÂ
âWhat, is there a right answer to this?â You were daring, careless with your tongue. âShouldâve given me a textbook, woulda studied real hard before coming down.âÂ
âThe right answer is the truth,â Jason spoke up, mouthful of food. âDickieâs all red and angry you canât even tell the truth. Honestly? So am I.â
âWe all are,â Tim murmured.Â
âBut you know? We care for you. So just tell us whatâs up, yeah?â Although his voice was light, there was an underlying threat to Jasonâs words. Tell us or else.Â
You set the fork down and looked at Bruceâwhose eyes were sweeping all over your face, calculatingâthe both of you having frowns tugging at your lips. âOkay. I feel like shit. A dumpster fire. Like my very body has been corrupted by darkâI donât know exactly what that means, but I feel it, so worth mentioning, right?âanyway, all I ask is to be left alone for a bit. That is what will make my mind better. Just a day of quiet. Please?âÂ
â...Voluntary isolation is a sign of clinical depression,â Bruce began. âAnd that would do you no good. What you need is the support of family to help you through this illness.âÂ
âGod, noââ
âListen.â Damian hissed.Â
You shut your mouth, eyes downcast.Â
âWhat will happen is every night, you talk to Dick about whateverâs bothering you. Or anyone else. You will talk, and that will help. Anything you need, just tell them; you know this.âÂ
âWhy not get an actual therapist?â
âYou canât trust all therapists,â Dick jumped in. âIâve trained in psychology, I know all the therapy ins-and-outs. I can help you as well as any licensed one wouldâif not, better!â
You stifled a sigh but didnât bother pushing saying anything.Â
âYou donât look to happy about that,â Dick commented. âItâs okay. I know its hard to open up when youâve suffered in silence for so long, but weâre all on your side, okay?â
Jesus.Â
You looked down at the food, picking up the fork. It took you everything not to bash your head against the table. Â
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the lady of crime alley
Summary: Jason had heard rumors of a woman who ruled Crime Alley and all of its underworld connections, so he pursues her for a favor.Â
Tags: jason todd x fem!reader, canon typical violence, unedited
Word count: 1.2k
Notes: iâve been on a red hood comic binge and i always thought his narration was corny in the best way, so i hope i was able to emulate that through this fic hehejejjejehe (also i use âtugging at your pigtailsâ as a metaphorical descriptor, not an actual physical attribute of reader!) alsoo, please send some batfam requests!Â
Jason had heard murmurs of the woman who was the true ruler of Crime Alley and all of its underworld connections.Â
At first, he dubbed it a win for feminism, because women too can be major players in crime worlds!Â
But then it got annoying real fast, because for some reason, you were real good at hiding your trail; every turn he went, the moment he thought he caught a glimpse of you, you were gone moments later like ash in the wind.Â
It took him five of your men and his a few hours of continuous beating to get the vaguest clue of where exactly you resided; he spent the rest of the week nosing his way through that misty trail, his irritation growing by every second he had to march down Gothamâs shittiest streets, and it didnât help that his red hood hardly had any breathing holes.Â
He was trying to keep his coolâhe really was!âbut the more you seemed to toss at him your half-starved homeless men at him, the more brutal the remnants of them became.Â
âGod fuckinââjesus, just tell me where the lady is!â He spat. âI just have some questions, thatâs all, why does she keep sending you guysââ
âWeâre telling you nuthinâ, that womanâs an angel and you ainât gettinâ yer dirty mitts on âer!â The manâa ragged, gaunt-looking guyâheaved, blood pooling out his mouth. "Youâll never see âerâ!âÂ
âYou just wanna talk?âÂ
Jasonâs head snapped up, hand still wrapped around the manâs throat.Â
In the warehouse which he had 'accidentallyâ beat everyone half to death, a woman stood at the entrance. Though it was night, the moon was bright enough for Jason to make out some of her features.Â
Sheâs easy on the eyes.
Suddenly, all the pent up irritation that had been writhing under his skin dissipated.Â
Heâs a sucker for hot women.Â
âHey,â He rose from the manâs body, standing tall. âYou must be the âtrue ruler of Crime Alleyâ or whateverâitâs a bit of a dumb name, donât you think?âÂ
You were silent, face scrunched.Â
âJeez, tough crowdââ
âWhat do you want, Red Hood?â You sounded mildly annoyed, as if heâs just some pesky kid tugging at your pigtails or something.Â
You took a step forward into the warehouse, arms crossed. âTalk. You have my attention now.âÂ
âOooo-kay, great! So, I kind of need help with somethingâa favor, if you will,â he raised his sword. It was busted and dull, practically just a dented piece of iron than an actual blade. âI need a replacement for thisââ he grinned. ââAnd all the information you have about Black Mask and his connections with Joker.âÂ
â...are you dumb?âÂ
âWhat?âÂ
âDo you actually think Iâm some ruler of Crime Alley? You werenât joking?â You laughed, eyes wide.Â
âYouâre not?âÂ
âNo! Iâm not the fucking ruler of anything! Come on Red Hood, is critical thinking not your strong suit?!âÂ
âHey, hey, câmon lady, go easy on meââ
âIâm just the woman who gives the people here a place to stay! Thatâs it! Is this the reason youâve been up my ass?!â You scowled at him. Were you a model, because you even made pissed look delicious. âBeating up a bunch of homeless guys âcause you thought I was a fuckinâ mob boss or something?âyeah, mob boss of the homeless? Seriously?"
He raised his hands. âOkay, when you word it like that, I feel dumb.âÂ
âYou are dumbâanyway, do me a favor and stop beating up the guys here? Please!?â You hissed, your hands balled into fists. âBecause Iâm the one that fixes up their wounds and I donât have the money to keep buying gauze and shit.âÂ
âOkay, okay, Iâm sorry, Iâll lay offâthough you coulda just have talked to me earlier?â He muttered the last part but you somehow still heard.
âYou think Iâm gonna go talk to the âRed Hoodâ? The guy that kills on his free time?âÂ
He sighed dramatically. âToucheâand itâs for a good cause! I only kill people thatââ
âYeah, yeah, donât list me your commandments to be on your fuckinâ hit list, God youâre annoying.âÂ
He laughed. âI have a feeling Iâve pissed you offââ
âYou beat a bunch of guys I take care of half dead. Pissed is hardly covering it.â
ââand you know what? I donât like pissing off pretty womenâI said it! I donât like it. So, I humbly apologize.â He swept his leg and arm in unison into a grandiose bow.Â
You scoffed, going to one of the unconscious men and pressing your fingers to his pulse. âI only accept apologies in cash.âÂ
âOh, okay, thatâs much easier,â making his way to you, he tugged off one of his blood-soaked gloves and rummaged his pocket. A couple hundred dollar bills were in there.Â
He extended them to you. âThese enough to soothe any hiccups?â
You carefully moved the unconscious man to the ground. From the pockets of your giant jacket came a small bag with a bottle of antiseptic, bandages, and a bunch of other shit.Â
You then looked at him, brows furrowed. âThatâs... a lot of money.â
âIs it?âÂ
âYeah? Do you have enough money for yourself?âÂ
Jason stared at you for a moment before barking out a harsh laugh. That earned him a frown. âYouâre worried? About me?âÂ
âNo, I just donât want you to beat some person up for their money if this is all you haveââ
âBaby, Iâm rich, I shit gold bars, just take it.âÂ
You glared at him for a second before snatching the money, shoving it into your pocket before tending to the man. Pushing up his shirt, Jason saw his body was covered in lacerations and bruises.Â
Jason whistled. âDamn, didnât think I was that strong.âÂ
âFuck off.â You sprayed some antiseptic. The man groaned.Â
Jason sat. He should be going off and looking for more trails of Black Mask, but he didnât really want toânot right now, anyway.Â
Even if youâre not some mob boss or whatever, you were still intriguing, and heâs a curious guy, he canât help but want to watch you some more.Â
However, he was quick to notice how stiff you were under his gaze.
His head tipped to the side. âHey, do I scare you?âÂ
You ignored him, running a rag along the guyâs body. Blood stained the white cloth instantly. You lifted the cloth and looked at Jason.Â
âThis is the worst you could do. Beat someone. Maybe flay them. Then they die.âÂ
He hummed.Â
âSo when you say âscareâ, I assume you mean the idea of you beating me or whateverâkilling me, or torturing, your shit.â Your eyes went back to the beaten guy, continuing with the cleaning. âYou donât.â
âIf thatâs the case, then whyâd you avoid me?âÂ
âBecause I had shit to do, thatâs why.â You unraveled a gauze. âNot everythingâs about youâeugh, I canât lift him, hey, since youâre just sitting here, help me a littleâyeah, just like that, thank you,â you swept the gauze under the manâs back then brought it back up. You repeated that motion. âBut yeah, not really scary. Death is justâwell, death.â
Jason nodded along. You were weird.Â
He liked weird.Â
When you were done, Jason put the man back down.
âWell, I gotta go now, duty calls and all.â
âOkay.â You got up, moving to the next guy.Â
âBye?âÂ
âJust leave.â
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Thank you for writing my request, I loved it!! I have another idea but it's a deeper subject so I understand not everyone is comfortable with writing about it. Could you write about a younger reader and the team see self harm wounds and scars while they were injured or while they were changing? (Something along those lines) and what they would do/ react? Xx
what is most precious to you?
Summary: The 141 discover a part of you that youâd wanted to bury.
Tags: TW s/elf harm scars + sui/cide and talk of it, please read carefully/don't read if this topic triggers you, platonic!141 x medic!fem!reader, reader implied to be mentally ill, younger!reader, descriptions of blood and injury, canon typical violence, soap + ghost focused, unedited
Word count: 1.5k
Notes: im glad u enjoyed the previous req anon! i hope I'm able to do this req justice too đŤĄ
Youâd been a part of the 141 long enough for the others to know and trust you.
An esteemed medic that knew medicine and all things fixing like the back of her hand, despite your ageâit was a natural skill, it seemed. Your hands were always so damn fast with a gauzeâhell, even a dirty rag youâd make use of in an instant.Â
You were just good. Reliable. Consistent. Seemingly just a normal young lady whose only eccentricity was the job she chose to be: a medic for a merc group.Â
Soap often liked to joke about that normalcy that clung onto you.Â
âBet when youâre on leave you work a 9 to 5 and sleep right at 8. Iâm right, arenât I?â
You snorted. âNo, Iâd sleep at 9.âÂ
âOhhhhh, daring! Donât be too crazy! Ya might just lose a leg!âÂ
Even Ghost would sometimes jump in, adding his own joke occasionally.Â
âShould I get you a planner for your birthday? A nice, minimalist one with neutral stickers to match.â
Youâd scoff and jab back, whether it be at Ghostâs mask or Soapâs current and past hair-styles.
But they never gave you a tough time about itâthey were glad that one of them was able to blend back to civvy life with ease.Â
Price even said it was his favorite traitââsometimes, you need the practicality and mindset of a normal lady to get shit done.â
âThanks?âÂ
The guys all had a similar image of what your childhood was like: middle-class, parents all stiff-like and old-timey, your favorite hobbies probably were things like football or reading, things like that.Â
However, that image shattered during a post-mission intermission.Â
Things went wrong, completely askewâthe enemies were clearly prepared for the attack, because landmines were everywhere and the area was crawling with hostiles.
It was a resounding lossâmany casualties, wounded, etc.Â
You could hardly keep up, trying to patch up as many as possible, even when the sky rained of bullets and the air tasted thickly of gunpowder and death. It was like a place between purgatory and hell, a constant flow of shouts, screams, explosions.
It was too late for you to noticed a bullet grazed your arm; it was deep enough to be visible, but luckily it wasnât aimed low enough for it to shoot into your arm.Â
You had ignored the woundâin your mind, it only made sense to focus on the soldiers who were fighting for their lives and riddled with bullet wounds.Â
So you just did that: focus on them.Â
But, due to the constant movement and strain, the graze only worsened, almost tearing. The adrenaline numbed the pain, but you knew it was gonna hurt like a bitch soon enough.Â
Luckily though, Ghost shouted in your ear through the comms.Â
âBravo-1, retreat!âfuckinâ hellâeveryone, retreat!â Â
You did just thatâretreat.Â
Huffing and puffing, you were quick to run to the distant chopper you recognized as the 141â˛s. A haze of sand was the only saving grace as it covered you from the enemies direct line of sight.
Soap pulled you into the helicopter with a quick grab of your wrist, completely unaware of the graze that arm sustained. You let out a sharp hiss of pain, feeling the skin tear just a little more.Â
The entrance of the helicopter shut, and with both of you heaving, the plane finally shot back into the air, rocking back and forth the slightest bit. The sound of bullets slowly melted away into harsh whirring and mechanical buzz.Â
You took a moment to collect yourself, inhaling sharply before you got up, arm still bleeding.Â
But, strangely, you felt it drip along your arm and into your hand, running along your fingerâah, it shouldâve been obvious, the sleeve of your wounded arm had completely torn.Â
You lifted the arm, examining the wound.Â
Scars of varying sizes, textures, and freshnessâsome having strange bubbly dots, others consisting of messy lines. Some of the fresher scars had torn a little, causing thin lines or red to rise.Â
Your blood ran cold. You glance up, hopingâprayingâthat Soap didnât see, or even understand the implications.Â
But you could see he was staring, the cogs in his mind slowly snapping together.Â
You put your arm away to your side, hiding it from his view.Â
âLassââ
âI need a medkit. We have one on the plane?âÂ
You loathed the look of sadness, of pity that shone in his eyes, pulled at the muscles of his face.Â
Donât. Stop.
Iâm not weak. DonâtâIâm not weak!Â
A chorus of words, feelings, of palpable dark was what filled your mind now. Insecurity, self-hatred, all of itâyouâd been working on it, trying to regulate, to reason with the miasma that had taken ahold of your consciousness.
But, fuck, youâve revealed it to Soap of all peopleâhe felt bad, didnât he? Disgusted? Worried? He was gonna tell Price, wasnât he? That your unfit for the 141, thatâ
A hand rested on the top of your shoulder.
âCan I patch you up?â Soap asked softly.Â
You grit your teeth. Moving away from his hand, you shook your head, glaring at the floor. A small splatter of blood was there. âI can fix it myself.âÂ
You expectedâwantedâhim to berate you.Â
But he didnât. He was kind.Â
âSure, kid. Iâll just get ya the med kitâstay put.âÂ
Another wave of shame rocked you. You sat on one of the small seats connected to the walls of the heli, rubbing away the small bits of dried blood.Â
Consumed by your thoughts, you didnât hear Soap murmuring to Ghost.Â
âThe kidâshe, ah...â He ran a finger along his wrist. âCatch my drift?âÂ
âCutting herself?â Ghost said bluntly.Â
âSometimes I wish you had a little more tact, L.T.âÂ
Ghost ignored him. âThey fresh or old?â
âBoth,â he sighed, grabbing a med kit from one of the planeâs various compartments. âWhatâre we supposed to do? Donât wanna scare off the kid, but donât wanna leave her on her own devices hacking away at âerself!âÂ
Ghost grabbed the kit from his hands. âIâll handle this. You sit downâgo near the Captain. Try to leave us some privacy.âÂ
Hesitantly, Soap nodded. âWork your magic, sir.âÂ
Ghost made his way to the other end of the helicopter where you were. You were hunched over your wound, a deep frown on your face. Itâs uncharacteristic, but he knew it was a part of yourself youâd prefer to be shrouded in dark. Suffering wasnât a nice look, was it?
But it was human. Denying your own right to feel itâit made Ghost frown too.
He sat beside you, kit in his hand. You had finally looked up then, alarmed.Â
âGimme your arm, kid.âÂ
You opened your mouth.
âNot leavinâ till I patch your arm up, so donât even try.âÂ
Shamefully, you lifted your arm slowly.Â
He took it with gentle but firm hands, a thumb running along a faint scar.Â
Ghost opened the kit haphazardly with another hand.Â
âWhen I was your ageâmaybe a little youngerâcouldnât find much meaning in everything.â
He lifted his hand from your arm and grabbed alcohol and a small cotton rag. Dampening the rag with alcohol, he drew it to your arm, rubbing away the excess blood and cleaning the wounds. You didnât make any noise, only breathing raggedly.Â
âThe suffering was pointless, in my eyes; thought, âthis isnât bloody fairâ. Born in a shitty house with a shitter father, food hardly ever on the table, my mind deteriorating, and the world cast in deep gray.â
You nodded.Â
Ghost grabbed a bandage gauze, unravelling it and wrapping it gently around the graze and the scars. It was calming, watching him work away, even if the wrapping was a little clumsy.Â
âThe harsh reality came a little while later, and itâs that people like meâusâwe gotta work hard for shit to change. That this weight forced upon us, itâs only we that can shed it off. Itâs still not fairâfrankly, suicide is easier. Thought of doing it for the longest time... But...âÂ
He shook his head. âIn my eyes, itâs a cowardâs way out. We should never die by our own handsâthereâs always something to live for.â
âWhat are you living for?âÂ
âMmmm.... For tomorrowâs pint.âÂ
You laughed.Â
He grabbed a safety pin and pinned the end of the gauze. â...now, I know itâs âsillyâ to say, but you know weâre here for you?âthe 141â˛s got your back, kidâhow about this, letâs make a deal.â
âYeah?âÂ
âYou ever have the urge to cut yer arm, you come straight to me, or the others. Theyâll listen. They care.â
They care. Â
Itâs weird, but hearing the words said out loud, it hit you.Â
They really care.Â
You took in a shaky breath. âThank... you.âÂ
âItâs no problem at all, kid. Stay strong.â
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hot head
Summary: You threaten a renowned colossi of a sniper and challenge him to fight.
Tags: sniper!kĂśnig x sniper!fem!reader, canon divergence, power imbalance(?), mentions of medicinal drug usage, unedited, reader implied to be on the younger side
Word count: 1.2k
Notes: I've decided to experiment more with characterization; I believe many character headcanons and depictions I make are often influenced by my own experiences, which is obvious, but it's hard to grasp when the character your writing is not only the opposite of you in many ways, but likely has a mindset much unlike yours (male, strong, a soldier, of a culture I know little of, etc) I feel like due to my own experiences, I unintentionally feminize and soften these hardened (male) characters... all this to say that if I keep jumping between versions of these characters, its due to this LMAOâalso, the major parallels this has to one of my previous konig oneshots was intentional! and, as usual, sorry for the dubious quality, i just wanted to get the idea down!
You were nervous.
It was hard not to bounce your leg, glance left and right, fiddle with anything beside or on you (dog tag, straps of your gear, a random coin), just trying to shake away the underlying anxiety that ate away at you.
But this is your first 'high-stake' mission, and not only that, but you've been handed to by veterans way beyond your league. You felt clumsy among them, severely inadequate.
Especially since you've been paired with the master class sniper, KĂśnig.
The mission, according to Aksel, is 'simple enough' for the two of you: you guys will be planted in opposite areas of the enemy base and shoot down and provide back up if stragglers come out or reinforcements come.
But, againâfirst fucking mission ever that's something as intense as this, and not only that, again, you were paired with KĂśnig.
You hadn't said anything though, merely nodding to the instruction with a swift 'understood, sir!'
Though you couldn't deny it: it was eating at you, and with your mind clouded with so much thought, it was difficult determining if your hands were gonna be steady enough to shoot (even though it didn't matter because the mission was taking place next week).
While you were busy mulling and agonizing over the hundreds and thousands of ways you could fuck up, you hadn't noticed a certain man making his way to you.
It was only when he spoke that you realized there was someone near. Head shooting up, you spoke quickly, not quite processing right away who it was.
"Yes?"
And then it hit you:
It's KĂśnig.
It shouldn't have been much of a surpriseâit's only natural for pairs in mission to discuss the details and set some sort of plan beforehand; it's practically protocol, actually.
But still, it surprised you. Still, you were able to shake off the surprise quick enough for his words to properly register when he spoke.
"You're nervous."
KĂśnig said the words with no ire, no disgust, no nothing. It was an observation, plain and simple.
"I... suppose I am, sir."
A puff of laughterâor was it just a scoff? Snort? "No need to address me as 'sir', I'm not your superior."
"Sorry. It's hard to when, you know," shut up. "you're kind of... legendary? I mean, master sniper and all," please just shut the fuck up. "You're kind of like a superior in a skill sense? You know in those rpgs when likeâ"
"I get it."
You laughed awkwardly, refusing to look at him directly.
"May I give you a piece of advice?"
You looked at him then. "Yes?"
"Cut the rambling short. Although I don't mind it, many others could and will use it against youâit's better to be blunt and honest rather than shy and all over the place." He lifted a finger. "One presumes and sets dominance," he lifted a second finger. "The other presumes and sets weakness."
You were a little offended by that. "Okay but what if I just stabbed them? Can't call me weak after that, even if I start stuttering like Porky Pig."
"..."
"...sorry."
KĂśnig laughed, and this time, you could properly identify it as one; it was throaty, almost raspy. "I see nowâyou're a loose-lipped girl. Either a mumbling mess or a sharp-tongued harpy."
"That a bad thing or a good thing?"
"It depends; say I use it against you, will you commit to your word and stab me?"
"I... won't?"
"Then no longer are your words a threat to me, because I now know you're just bark and no biteâ"
"I won't because we're comrades right now, but I'd stab you the moment my contract ends!"
Fuck. Fuck.
You did not just threaten a man nearly twice your height and thrice your muscle massâ
"You'll stab me when your contract ends?" He echoed. Amused.
Amused.
"Yeah, dull knife and allâcut you like butter." You rose from your seat, almost chest-to-chest, staring up at KĂśnig with a glare.
He met your glare with crinkled eyes.
He was looking at you as though you were nothing but a petulant, whiny kid.
"Foolish girl," his voice was light, chiding. "You're barking at the wrong man. Surely you can see that?"
"You're awfully cocky, aren't you? Why not challenge this 'foolish girl' to a spar and prove your worth?!"
"Hmm... okay. I see why not. Perhaps a good hit or two will set you straight, no?"
It took you everything not to (try to) body-slam that fucker.
World renowned sniper or not, you're gonna kick his ass to the goddamn dirt till he's nothing but a pulp of fabric and blood.
---
The two of you were quick to make your way outside, somewhere far enough where no one would see the unregulated fight, but close enough for the safe-house to be in your line of sight.
Sand whipped and pushed at you, the sun was scorching and degrading, but you held still; you were determined to kick KĂśnig's assâeven if he's huge, you know how to fight big opponents, you trained rigorously to.
KĂśnig stood two meters from you. He cast a long shadow, light kissing the top of his metal helmet. "The rules are simple enough; whoever keeps the other pinned down for five seconds win and we only use the military-issued knife. Is this fair?"
"Fair."
"Good," he nodded. "Start."
The sand made your footwork unsteady, but not enough to throw you off; light on your feet, you moved close to KĂśnig, knife unsheathed.
He didn't pull out his knifeâin fact, he hardly moved, merely pivoting from time to time from your swings.
You swung your blade forward, aiming for his vest; again, he easily dodged, and with your outstretched arm he pulled you forward.
You could hardly register the movement; one second you were on your feet, and the next you were flat on your stomach, sand in your mouth, and blade far from your hand.
You couldn't move: your wrists were tight in KĂśnig's grip, his knee digging into your lower back. You tried wriggling your legs, but his knee dug deeper until you let out a pained wheeze.
Then, a moment later, he continued pushing his knee deeper. The sand burned your skin.
1...
2...
3...
"Okayâfuck, okay, stopâyou win! Happy now?!"
4...
5...
He finally moved his knee. The shadow that cast over your body was gone.
"You should be happy, maus." He sighed somewhat dramatically. "Had it been any other man, I'm sure he would've been thrilled to harm a pretty girl. Many have twisted minds."
"I'll jusâeugh..." you spat out sand, flipping over and sitting on your ass, propping yourself up with your hands. "I'll just stab those ones, thenâand wait! Why'd you say that? That's super creepy, and what does 'maus' meanâ?"
"Enough of the blabbing." KĂśnig said. "And 'maus' means mouse."
"Mouse?"
"Yes, because you chatter away like a little mouse. I like mice."
"You're..."
"Weird?"
"Weird would be underselling it," you muttered, getting on your feet.
"Hm. At least my severe 'weirdness' cured you of your anxiety."
You were ready to snap out an insult, but... he was right.
Your hands weren't shaking anymore. They were steady. You could trust them.
But you couldn't give him that. "Weird assumption, weirdo. I just had a lot of coffee."
"...it seems I've failed to cured you of your tongue, though.â
Childishly, you stuck out your tongue. "Loser."
He merely huffed a laugh at that. It didn't anger you as much as before.
Actually... it didn't piss you off at all.
He really was a weirdo. Nothing like the image you had conjured of him before. (You liked this version of KĂśnig better.)
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bro,,,your last ghost one,,,,head full, big thonks
what if hound!reader never went looking for simon because she thought he was dead?? or better yet, she DID look, so vigorously in fact that her superiors at the time maybe misinformed her of his death, even going as far as planting fake evidence??đđ
also im thinking about old nicknames..,.,hitting him with the "si-guy" or "'mon-mon the man" or smth đ
canât say goodbye to yesterday
PART TWO TOÂ âHEARTS ALIGNEDâ
Summary: You were deceived by the same people you fought for. You discuss it with Ghost.Â
Tags: soldier!fem!reader (call sign âhoundâ) x ghost (2022 version), childhood friends, smoking, canon divergence of both the game and the oneshot, barely edited, death, lowkey konig x reader
Word count: 1.4k
Notes: anon, you're genuinely such a GENIUS!!!! those thonks fr are gold bc now my head is full of thonks too hehe---this post will hopefully extend those clever thonks and added more???Â
You were sitting against the wall while Ghost was laying in his cot. The night had grown old, but you refused to leave himâthat wonât happen again, not now, not ever.Â
You were on your third cigarette, the smoke having long since coated your mouth in a thick layer of cheap tobacco and newspaper. Ghost didnât seem to mind, laying on his side, watching you with tired eyesâmore so watching the cigarette.Â
Extending it forward, your head tipped to the side. âYou sure you donât want one?âÂ
âNo. I should be sleeping.âÂ
âYouâre eyeing my cigarette though.â
âJust lost in thought.â
âAbout smoking a cigarette?âÂ
He huffed. âNo. Just...â he sat up now, the cot straining under his movement. âYouâve changed. And you also havenâtâand you havenât told me why you didnât search for me.â
You frowned.
âJusâ tell me that. Tell me why. I donât give a bloody fuck if you were just too lazy tooââ
âSmoke with me and Iâll tell you everything.â Your voice was strained.Â
Emotions were high, tension was thick, maybe it was foolish to think that would just dissolve by planting yourself in his room. You werenât kids. This wasnât just a blow-up about something dumb, and you hated it. Because at least when you were kids, the arguments were insignificant, the worst that could happen is you calling him a âbooger-brained idiotâ.Â
This was real. This brought true hurt.
You were thankful when Ghost finally nodded, getting up and sitting across you on the floor. Despite sitting criss-crossed, he was huge. He towered over you. KĂśnig would often shimmy away, giving you a little spaceâheâd bend his body downward in a vain attempt to dwarf himself.
But Ghost sat tall. He stared right at you and lifted a hand.Â
You gave him the cigarette.Â
You watched as he lifted the balaclava a little, setting the end at the bridge of his nose. It was just a small sliver of his face, but fuck did it strike you right at your heart.Â
His face was all firm linesâcarved and rigid, with the lightest scar running along his lips.Â
Simonâsmaller, younger Simonâhad a round face. Soft cheeks, a crooked smile, unscarred.
You looked away to the side at the hard concrete wall, back pressed against it.Â
A waft of smoke hit you, then a finger lightly tapped on your hands.Â
You turned. Ghost was lifting the cigarette to you.Â
Taking it, you murmured a quick thanks before taking a puff out of it yourself. Ghost tugged down the balaclava once more.Â
âWhy didnât you search for me?âÂ
âI did,â you responded simply. âIt was when I was younger. Naive. More trusting. You know, I searched for you every moment I gotâthought you still went by âSimon Rileyâ. Even went as far as to go to the superiors and ask all nicelyâtold them, âheâs the son of that piece of shit drunkard, the one who you constantly kissed up to.ââ You laugh though itâs devoid of any humor. Â
Ghost only watched, listened, eyes flicking between the cigarette and your straying gaze.Â
âTheyâthey told me you were dead. Thatâs it. Nothing more, nothing less. âSimon Riley was killed in action a few years backâ one of them had told me, all sad-like and frowning. âHe was a good soldier.ââ You scoffed. âNo fanfare, no tricks, they justâthey said you were dead. Showed me a document or two, I hardly fuckinâ remember, I just... I tried to forget. Not to care.â
Your hands were shaking. You didnât know why. Your heart was silent, so was your mind, but your bodyâit was moving on its own. As though shedding a deeper feeling your own mind couldnât process.Â
âSo can you imagine my surprise when, just a few months ago, a man named âGhostâ happens to be registered as âSimon Rileyâ in their files? I couldnât believe it, thought there was another Simon Riley whose from the UK, but I was curious. So... yeah. I ended up in KorTac âcause I heard rumors 141 was gonna come along and do some mission together.â Again, you laughed. âThen I saw youâand fuck, did I tell you how much youâve grown? You look so differentâactually can I say something weird?âÂ
âYeah.â His eyes met yours.Â
An unfamiliar smile formed on your lips. âIt... it makes me happy, seeing you with that Scot, all grown, and... itâs hard to put into words, but it makes me feel proud. And it also hurts like a bitch.â
He hummed. âCould say the same.âÂ
âThen say the same. I want to hear it, Simon.â
âIt makes me feel proud, and it hurts like a bitch.âÂ
You snorted. âAss.â
He reached for your cigarette. You handed it to him. âSo... does that clear things?âÂ
âYep,â he tugged his balaclava off this time, pushing the cigarette between his lips. Heâs handsome. âShoulda guessed youâre too much of a gullible dumbass to find me.âÂ
âYou piece ofâkeep talking shit and Iâll kick your ass!â You reached for the cigarette. He moved away from your reach, a shit-eating grin now plastered on his face.
âYou kickinâ my ass? Iâd like to see you try, pipsqueak.âÂ
âDonât test me mon-mon.âÂ
He glared. âMon-mon?â Â
âSorry, wait, mon mon the manâmy bad, nearly forgot the whole damn title.âÂ
âKeep callinâ me that and Iâll be the one kicking your ass.âÂ
âNot gonna listen to a guy named si-guy.âÂ
âShut. Up.âÂ
You laughed. It was dumb and childishânot even that funny, franklyâbut something about Simon frowning all seriously brought it out of you.Â
A moment later, the frown disappeared, and Simon handed the cigarette back with a little smile. Â
Bonus headcanons (post oneshot):
When you two were kids, you often took the role of the mature one to reign in any dumb ideas that Simon schemed, though youâd participate in them moments later.Â
The roles have reversed now: you are the dumbass and Ghost tries his best to keep it under control.Â
The moment youâre near Ghost, a little layer of your cold exterior melts a little and you allow yourself to drop your guard a little and be loose-lippedâthough, in public or with the guys, you tone it down a little and still address him as Ghost.Â
In private though? The names are everything except for Ghost.Â
Si-guy, mon-mon the man, syphilis, Simon says, se-si-so-fum (fe-fi-fo-fum), etc.Â
Half the time the names just donât even correlate with his and he quickly just got used to it.Â
No one really notices the change between the two of you except for Soap, who takes note of the small glances the two of you exchange like itâs a secret language that could only be communicated between you guys.
He even noticed the small brush of your hand against Ghostâs shoulder after a particularly difficult mission and he returned it moments later.Â
He has no idea if your friends, lovers, or just like?? Related maybe?? even if it would make ZERO sense for that to be the case.
In regards to KĂśnig, Ghost would be protective.Â
He wouldnât be shy to voice his thoughts against the relationship because heâs seen how monstrous KĂśnig could be on the battlefield and worries that heâs just hiding that âtrue personaâ of his for whatever reason.Â
Also because heâs possessive; heâs convinced himself heâs just looking after you but he doesnât like the idea of you straying away again but this time for some other guy.Â
He also doesnât know if he likes you romantically or not: he likes you, but he has no idea if the strength comes from a romantic pull or if itâs just platonic. He just wants you close.Â
Also, both of you know each otherâs tells; old habits die hard, and the tells you both had of discomfort from childhood still exist to this day.
Simon would go quiet and have a very specific stare that just kind of... glazes over. Itâs dissociative.
Youâd gently pry him out of that state with uncharacteristically soft words, making random observations or jokes.Â
Whenever you're in a similar state, he'd just sit beside you and kind of lean inâhe might just straight up grab your hand and squeeze if no one is nearby.
Overall, to any outsider, you guys would just appear to be comrades with the same layers of cold and bile, but in reality, you guys have history.
Despite the time that had passed, you'd still call each other the best of friends.
You're satisfied with that, but Ghost is unsure if he wants something more.
Until then, he'll just shoot KĂśnig glares until he figures out what he really wants.
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Could I request a kĂśnig x reader in which sheâs one of the best soldiers/snipers in the world, covered in tattoos, smokes and is a âI joined the military out of spite and somehow all that anger turned me into thisâ, and kĂśnig is just smitten with her?
its time you learn to accept yourself
Summary: Through KĂśnig, you learn love and self-acceptance.Â
Tags: sniper!fem!reader x konig, strangers to friends to lovers, headcanon format, reader implied not to speak german, reader implied to be mentally ill, unedited
Word count: 1.7k
Note: im starting to really like this genre of ship-dynamic LMAO
When you joined KorTac, it was clear you didnât give much of a shit about anyone there.Â
You kept to yourself, spoke in monosyllables, and had much more interest in smoking the cigarettes you kept sneaking into the base than talking to any of them.Â
Heâd heard operators call you several thingsânone of them flattering to your imageâhowever, one thing stood out clearly to him:
You were a good shot. They all agreed to that. To them, though your personality was shit, you had the eye of a hawk and the hands of a trained and experienced veteran who knew the sniper like the back of their hand.Â
He couldnât help but admire you, regardless of the fact youâve never acknowledged his presence or even looked at him.Â
He also couldnât help but admire how calm you were, how you were just... yourself. Sleeves always rolled up with your tattoos in full display, a cigarette always nursed between your lips, the fact you never watered down your personality; he wanted that confidenceâno, that sureness your character carried.Â
KĂśnig knew you liked to lurk near the shooting rangeâsince youâd joined, he avoided disturbing you and had often gone to the other side of the range to practice his shots.Â
However, in a fit of uncharacteristic confidence, he decided to approach you.Â
He was prepared for your scathing words, or the silent look of disgust you often wore around the other men.
But, when he approached, you regarded him neutrally.Â
âHey, youâre...âÂ
âKĂśnig.â
âYeah, KĂśnig, youâre KĂśnig.â You echoed the accent of the word, looking proud. âI pronounced that well, right? KĂśnig.â You repeated his name as though it were a flavorful candy.
He was rendered mute; German sounded so nice on your tongue.Â
âKĂśnig?âÂ
âA-ah, scheiĂe, I was lost in thought for a second,â he laughed awkwardly. âYou said it well, yes.âÂ
ââkay, good. Anyway, whatâd you want?â
It was a blunt but reasonable question, but with your eyes trained on him, it was suddenly hard to speak or think.Â
Bashfully, he spoke. âMay I shoot with you?âÂ
âUh, of course? This isnât my shooting range, man. Have fun.âÂ
âNo, with you.âÂ
âWith me?â You echoed, dumbfounded. âHowâd that work?âÂ
âWeâll make it a friendly competitionâif youâd like, of courseâwhoever gets the most bulls-eyes wins.â
You smiled. It was brighter than the sun. âSure! Sounds like funâyou go first, then.âÂ
KĂśnig does. It was an easy shot, anyone could hit it, but he could feel your eyes watching him.Â
Trying to steady his hands, he set his sniper on top of the heavy crates and tried to aim, trying to clear his mind.
It was difficult. Again, your eyesâhe wondered if he was making any mistakes he didnât even know of. He was sure he was doing everything right, but... was he?Â
âYour hands are shaking, KĂśnig. Try steadying them like this,â roughly, you took the hand that had been on the trigger and made the weight even.Â
His cheeks erupted in warmth. Too close.Â
He quickly takes a shot, and it was just about to hit the bullseye.Â
âTime to show ya how the pros do it!â You sit right beside him, kneeling in front of the crates and setting your own sniper onto them. He noticed rough engravings on the snout of your gun, a rough shape of a butterfly and snake.Â
Before he could ask about them, you shot. You had barely paused to even adjust.Â
When he looked up, he couldnât help the wave of admiration that hit him.
You hit the bullseye perfectly.
âMaybe one day you can be as good as me,â you teased, voice light. âBut your ass needs practice. Can I help?âÂ
He couldnât trust his voice so he merely nodded. Thank God he had a hood over his head because he was sure he resembled more tomato than a human.Â
After that though, the two of you became closerâyou saw each other more, interacted more, etc.Â
You had taken a swift liking to him; he was eager to learn, polite, and soft-spoken, how could you not?Â
KĂśnig, though? Heâs skipped the âfriendâ part and went straight to crushing; honestly, he was flattered enough that you just acknowledged his presence, being one of the best snipers and all, but the fact you went out of your way to teach himâtalk to himâit went all straight to the heart.
Even on missions, youâd talk to him. Youâd often favor being quiet, whistling the odd tune or two before taking your shots, but now youâve come to just take those small pauses to tease him incessantly.Â
KĂśnig was about to maul an enemy before a bullet shot through their head.Â
His earphones sparked to life.Â
âYou should be more careful, I almost couldnât save you there.â Your voice crackled through.Â
He couldnât help but huff, half amused, half worried. âDidnât Aksel say for you to clear out the enemies on your end?âÂ
âDid already. They were like sitting ducks.â
You two are an actual powerhouse in missions;Â KĂśnig with his physical prowess, easily overpowering anyone in his way, and you with your sniper, taking any enemies behind him down in an instant.Â
You only grew closer to him and vice versa, and eventually, the daily conversations nearly became constantâattached to the hip, understanding each other to the extent that quick glances would equate to hundreds of lines of dialogue.Â
It was during this that you realize youâve grown... attached.Â
It worries youâno, it scares you.Â
You were, in your eyes, a poison that could do nothing but harm a soul like KĂśnigâs; despite is outward brutality, you knew inside he was nothing but gentleâor maybe you were blind. Maybe you were in love and refused to see the dark that tainted his inner consciousness.Â
Or, maybe, you liked that too about him.Â
In any case, it was worrisome; it bit at your insides, at the quiet part of your mind, it lit everything to flame then ash.Â
You werenât the woman you were before the military; fuck, maybe that version of you never existedâyou were always so fucked up, so full of incomprehensible anger that set every step you took on fire.Â
That worry turned to anxiety, and it only increased when you realized that your stable, steady hands have become a shaking mess.Â
It was during a pause between missions that you try to clear your head, to purge those feelings you thought and knew wouldnât lead to any good.Â
However KĂśnigâoh, KĂśnigâfollowed.
You told him not to, but he knew something was wrong, that you werenât quite as steady as heâd known you to be; it was a weakness, a vulnerability that, right now, could harm you.Â
Neither of you had the comfort of being weak, especially in a safe house that could be overridden with hostiles at any moment of the day. If he couldnât help, heâd at least want to be able to protect you during this time.
So, he followed, through the murky corridors and under the cloak of night, finding you outside with a cigarette between your lips.Â
You saw him and you were ready to snap at him, to drive him away, but he spoke so fucking softly.Â
âAre you okay?â
You werenât. He knew you werenât, and you knew he knew that.Â
So you sighed. Gestured for him to come, and he did, leaning against the concrete wall beside you.Â
You were particularly loose-lipped, but at that moment, all inhibitions of restraint were gone.Â
âItâs all a lieâwhen people join the military, itâs rarely for that strive of good.â You took a harsh suck of the cigarette. âYou think any person with a good head on their shoulders and love for life would want to be in a fuckinâ military? Or a merc group? No amount of money makes this worth it, no... never.âÂ
KĂśnig was silent. Listening. Thinking.
âMore often than not, people just join to justârun. Die. Cut their losses and just engulf themselves in the worst of the worst because of their own flawsâhamartias. Know that word?â
KĂśnig nodded.
You laughed airily. It was hardly a laugh, more like a throwaway noise. âI learnt it back in high school in English classââfatal flaw of a heroâ, or something. Flaws... good, bad, right, wrong, villainous, heroic, itâs a mouthful, isnât it?â
KĂśnig nodded again.Â
âSo many labels for those who, in hindsight, or just cogs to a greater machine. A twisted machinationâisnât that the true evil? The machinery?â
âYou make it sound difficult,â KĂśnig breathed. âWhen everything is so much simpler than that. Personal principles define those beliefs, right and wrong is as broad as it is small.âÂ
You hummed. âNever struck you for the philosophical type.â
âIâm not. Philosophy is redundant. The answer is always found within our hearts.âÂ
âHmmm.â You took another puff of the cigarette. âThe answer in my heart was anger. Always anger. Violence, insults, it always seemed most effective... I thought the military would set me straight, make me more controlled, but it did the opposite.â You stared at the ground, smoke spilling out your lips. âIâm worse now, a festering disease. I can feel myself burning out day by day, and, KĂśnig? I want you to stay away from thatâfrom me.âÂ
âI wonât.âÂ
âWhat?âÂ
âI refuse. I will stay by your side.â I canât bear to leave you alone.Â
âBut... why?â Why, why, why?Â
âBecause youâre the most beautiful flame Iâve ever seen.â I love you. Accept that. âDonât cut yourself short, liebe. You can always change and grow. Or remain stagnant. Either way, my eyes will always be on you.â
You, for the first time in your life, couldnât trust your voice.Â
But when you looked up at him, you hoped that the message was there. That he could see.Â
And he did, and you couldnât help the smile when you saw that the corners of his eyes crinkled.Â
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Hello. I saw your post and would you be up for doing a bit on a reader who cares little about themselves but cares deeply for the team?
love deterrence
Summary: You care about the 141 more than yourself to a worrisome degree.Â
Tags: platonic!141 x soldier!fem!reader, mentally ill reader (implied), headcanon format, reader implied to be young, unedited
Word count: 1.3k
Notes: ANON... THE MOMENT I SAW THIS I DROPPED EVERYTHING. the requests I get r always top tier, BUT THIS IS S +. also my bad for this being price/soap/ghost-centric, theyre the characters im most confident in writing---and, also also, SEND REQUESTS. you guys are so slay w reqs its actually insane
You were a soldierâa good one at that.Â
Thorough in your assignments, fearless on the field, and reliable. Truly, itâs something any enlister would seek out.Â
That was Priceâs initial thoughtsâeveryone elseâs, really. You liked to get shit done and you were determined to always, always see through a missionâs completion.Â
It was a trait that, at first, wasnât noticeable, but it intensified the longer you stayed with the 141.Â
Many things increased the longer you were with them: you went from formal to friendly, quiet to outspoken, frigid to warm... you grew comfortable. They each took notice in their own wayâwith Soap being the one to constantly reciprocate and encourage in his own way; despite his loud character, he was subtle in pushing you out of your bubble.
Even Ghost encouraged you... in his own way.Â
âYou look like you wanna say something, spit it out, kid.âÂ
It was hard not to warm up to them, and vice versa; the team was as tightly knit as they come, and you could confidently say that youâd trust your life in their hands...
...but, youâd much rather they worry about you last.
And that was when Ghost was the first to notice your recklessness on the field when it came to them; the moment you heard one of them was in danger, youâd be quick to finish the area in such a careless manner and rush to themâand many, many times heâd berate you about it.Â
âKid, when I tell you to stay put, you stay put.â
âButââ
âNo fuckinâ âbutsâ, you shut up and listen, understand?!âÂ
â...yes sir.âÂ
But you always disobeyed. At one point, Ghost demanded Price to put you on temporary leave because of how worrisome it was gettingâyouâd listen to every single order and follow through in quick succession, but the moment it came to your safety, you just..?
And thatâs when it clicked to Ghost: you didnât care. It was their lives over yours, and something about that just pissed him off.Â
(Maybe it was because he understood the feeling, and he hated knowing that you felt it too. You were young, you shouldnât feel that wayânot now, not ever.)
Price would catch on later around the same time Soap didâalthough the two certainly werenât dumb, itâs just the mere fact that they didnât understand the way Ghost didâtheyâve had their mental pitfalls, but not the abject depression that pushes one to feel so little about themselves.Â
Theyâd find out much laterâyouâve become sneakier in protecting them, something that Ghost still catches from time to time but canât butt in since you were so damn clever with itâand it was when an enemy tossed a bomb in your and Soapâs direction that your nature dawned on him.Â
You were quick to toss the bomb back, and not only did you do that, but you shielded him from the blast by throwing yourself onto him despite the fact you were smaller than he.Â
Luckily, the blast didnât harm you, only leaving you with a few scrapes and ringing ears.Â
But, the moment he got back up on his feet, you were fretting.
âYou okay, Soap? Youâre not hurt, are youâ?!âÂ
âLass, worry about yourself, Iâm fine!âÂ
âAre you sure?âÂ
It was like talking to a brick wall: terribly frustrating.
Price, having been a few feet away and had shielded from the blast, saw the spectacle and almost laughed.Â
It was ridiculous to himâyou threw yourself, but youâre worrying about the muscle-bound soldier?Â
He didnât like soldiers who tried to play heroâespecially soldiers who were hardly grown. Especially soldiers who seemed to lack care for themselves.
So, Price would start sneaking in sentiments of care: complimenting you outside the field, (âYou made that, sergeant? Great job, it looks wonderful.â) trying to hear you communicate your own interests, things about you.Â
Soap already does that, and Ghost soon follows too, though slowly. He wasnât good at praisingâhis compliments were always so awkward, no better than his fucked up jokes that he cracked at the worst times.Â
Price always made sure to give you the best cots, Ghost would give you a portion of his food because...
âIâm watching my weight.â
âWhat?âÂ
âYou heard me, sergeant. Iâm watching my weight.âÂ
â...youâre literally a soldierââ
âJust eat the food kid, donât make me repeat myself.âÂ
Soap was the only direct oneâthe other two didnât want to make it uncomfortable for you, but Soap was, well... Soap.Â
âLook, kid, lass, you need to start lookinâ out for yerself.âÂ
âI am already, donât worryââ
âYou stood in front of Price when you thought there was an enemy sniper.âÂ
âHeâs the captain! I gotta protect him!âÂ
âYou couldâve just told himâlisten, I donât like using threats, thatâs the L.Tâs thing, not mine, but if you continue to treat your arse like a meatshield, Iâm gonna make sure youâre put on leave again, okay?âÂ
It becomes a struggle after that: you felt overwhelming guilt for feeling guilt, for being âselfishâ, or feeling guilty for taking risky actions in order to protect them because you know theyâll feel bad.Â
Itâs a perpetual struggle that you didnât know what to do about, and itâs at the worst time you broke down.Â
You and Ghost were cleaning up the mess hall since Soap won a bet against him, and when you picked up an extra plate more than Ghost, you began overthinking.
Was this gonna piss off Ghost? Were you going to make him feel bad? Were you doing this for yourself or for him? Why did you do thatâshould you give him the plate? What should you do? Whatâs the right thing?
As much as the guys tried to ease your mind, I think they did the opposite: and, at that moment, you couldnât stop the tears.
That made you even guiltier, especially when Ghost noticed.Â
But, all he said was âtalk.â His voice was uncharacteristically soft, and with that allowance, you spoke.Â
It was incoherent: a babbling mess of âsorrysâ and admissions of guilt for shit he didnât even know one could feel guilty forâyou shook, moments would jump where you would collect yourself for a few seconds before bursting once more.Â
Taking the dishes from your hands, he set them back on the table and engulfed you in an awkward but strong hug. He didnât trust himself to say anything right, but he hopedâprayedâthat you knew the sentiments.Â
And you didâyou reciprocated immediately, burying your face into his bulletproof vest; heaving, shaking, breaking.Â
He was then at a crossroads: you were unstable. Guilt like thatâthis faux selflessness that was really something more tragicâit only leads to one thing, a thing he couldnât bring himself to name.Â
So, the same night when he was sure you were asleep, he went straight to Price.Â
âSir.âÂ
âYes, Ghost?âÂ
âThe kidâshe canât stay. She needs to see a professional.âÂ
Price sighed. âYou donât think Iâm tryinâ? Been trying to reach a psychologistâtherapistâwhomever. Laswellâs said sheâs workinâ on it, so weâll see.â
âBut she canât stay, this type of job, itâs not good for her mind.âÂ
âThatâs up to her. You canât just kick someone outâitâs ainât that simple.âÂ
Ghost opened his mouth, ready to spit back, but Price cut in, stern. âItâs up to her. Iâll make sure she sees a professional at least bi-weekly, but you canât force a leave on her.âÂ
Ghost settled with that, though not completely satisfied.Â
When you eventually do see a professional, you get a little betterâyou recognize the patterns, the triggers, the reasons. Itâs easier to dissemble the mess that your mind is and just understand.Â
Although youâre a little more careful now, more thoughtful about your own body, thereâs always a level of protection you place on them that they know is irremovable: itâs care.Â
And they reflect that care right back at you, both in and out of the field.Â
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hearts aligned
PART TWO
Summary: He keeps pretending he doesnât know you and itâs starting to get on your nerves.Â
Tags: soldier!fem!reader (call sign âhoundâ) x ghost (2010 version), childhood friends, grief, smoking, lowkey reader x konig, canon divergence, hurt/comfort(?), barely edited, suicidal implications
Word count: 1.4k
Note: this is kind of the continuation of the konig fic i made with that reader, though not really? like these oneshots r connected but u can still read this without reading the other, but i recommend reading that one first
He was pretending not to know you.Â
He avoided your gaze, full of ire and judgement, favoring the sight of the wall behind you.Â
âYouâre Captain Price?â Youâd asked gruffly, trying to stave away the flame that licked at your nerves. âAn honor. Didnât think KorTac would be able to contact you guys.âÂ
âCould say the same for you, Hound.â Price responded, lighting a fat cigar. âThough Iâm more surprised about how yer still alive.âÂ
Priceâs menâall talking among themselves in the KorTac loungeâdidnât avoid your prying stare, nodding to you before turning back to their comrades.Â
Ghost hadnât. Heâs not looked at you once.Â
Instead, heâs still staring at the damn wall.
âWhat can I say? I have the devilâs luck. Iâll share my secrets if you ask nicely.âÂ
Price chuckled. âKeep âem to yourselfâin any case, how longâre you planninâ to stay?âÂ
You were staring fully at Ghost now.Â
Heâs turned his head, now talking to the ScotsmanâSoap, was it?Â
âDunno. Just gonna stick around till I feel like Iâve done my part.âÂ
âYou always been a vagrant? Why not settle down with KorTacâor, perhaps, with the 141? I wouldnât mind the extra set of hands.âÂ
âI wouldnât mind prying my molars out with my own hands, either.âÂ
He sighed. âI canât help but wonder what crawled up your ass and died. Even if youâre opposed to the 141, why not KorTac? You even have your own right-hand man trailinâ after you like a lost pup.âÂ
It was your turn to sigh. âYouâve noticed KĂśnig?âÂ
Price leaned against the wall, taking in a quick puff before snorting. âHard not to when heâs a fuckinâ giantâyou donât seem to mind, though. Didnât think you were that type.âÂ
âWhat type?â You smiled, extending a hand.
He passed you the cigar. His voice lowered despite the fact no one was listening. âThe heartless type. Youâre humoring the man when we both know youâd sooner die than settle down like that.âÂ
You took a long suck. Itâs expensiveâaromatic with clear punches of spice and earth.Â
Too expensive.
You handed the cigar back. âI donât mind the shadow, the sunâs pretty harsh here and I donât wanna age like a pig.â
âWrong thing to worry about,â he hummed, lifting the cigar to his mouth once more.
âLet me be a little vain, Price,â you stretched your arms. âIn any case, Iâm gonna go âhit the hayâ. Have fun spending the night slaving away at papers.â
âDonât remind me...âÂ
You laughed at that. You shot one last glance at Ghostâwhose back was turned to you, prickâbefore heading out of the lounge.Â
It was just after a few seconds of walking you heard footsteps behind you. You recognized the light steps immediately.Â
Without bothering to turn, you spoke. âNot tonight, KĂśnig. Iâm busy.â
â...Tomorrow?âÂ
You hated the power his voice had over youâhow fucking soft it was. It made you feel bad. Guilty.
You turned around then, offering him an apologetic smile. Under the dim, flickering lights of the hallway, he looked monstrous, but his eyes were warm. âHow about the morning, then? We can shoot at the range on the crack of dawn.â
The corners of his eyes crinkled, just enough for you to know he was smiling. âThat sounds good, thank you.â
âNow, go to sleep. Itâs late.âÂ
âYes, maâam.âÂ
âI thought I told you before not to call meââ
Heâd turned around already, walking off in the opposite direction, back to his barracks.Â
Iâll talk to him about that tomorrow. You continued walking, making your way through the twisting hallways until you finally found it.
His room.Â
It was an invasion of privacy in many ways, this could get you in trouble in an instant, but you didnât give a shit. Not now.
Simonâs gonna answer to you, and heâs not gonna hide behind that shitty mask of his. Not now. Not after the past youâve shared.Â
You opened his door with ease, and inside, it was just as you expected: empty, save for the raggedy cot and personal equipment.Â
There was a deep shadow cast in one of the shadows just along the wall where the door was.Â
Shutting the door, you went to the corner, back pressed against the hard concrete as you just stared at where the door was.Â
You were going to stay here till he comes, and you were only going to leave till he answered you.Â
Until he finally looked at you.Â
---
You didnât know how much time has passed, your brain had been filled with nothing but static and air, but when you finally heard footsteps draw close to the door, you snapped out of your stupor.Â
Standing tall, you crossed your arms, staring at the door as it swung open.Â
He didnât notice youânot right away, his peripheral gaze not aimed at the side where you were lurking.Â
It was only when he shut the door and looked around the room that he finally noticed you.Â
He froze, tired eyes sharpening with ice.Â
But he wasnât looking at you, no, he looked at your face, not your eyes.Â
âWhatâre you doing here?â His voice was cold, callous.
âYou know why Iâm here, you piece of shit.â You took a step forward, lifting your chin. âWhy have you been avoiding me?âÂ
He snorted. âDidnât know we were in middle school againââ
âWe might as well be with how much of a fucking idiot you are.â You took another step forward.Â
He narrowed his eyes but remained as still as a stone. Still, not looking at you. âWell, now Iâm here. Happy? Leave.â
âYouâfuck, Simonââ
âGhost.â He corrected coldly.Â
âOh, shut up, youâre Simon and youâll always be Simon.âÂ
âYou havenât earned the right to say my nameââ
âI earned that fuckinâ right the moment I took in your sorry ass back when we were kids.â Now you were right in front of him, looking up, trying to meet his gaze.Â
And he didâfuck, he finally did, and what reflected was an incomprehensible mix of emotions you couldnât decodeâyou couldnât care to.Â
Because that wasnât enough, you realize. You didnât just want his eyes, you wanted him.Â
In hindsight, it was obvious, but at that moment, your rage was numbed by confusion.Â
You stumbled back.Â
Again, he was unmoving, but his hand had twitched forward.
The movement made you scoff. Your heart was on fire.Â
You laughed. It was loud, harsh, grating. âYou canât justâyou canât just spend an eternity with me then run off and pretend I donât existââÂ
âThen imagine how I felt when I found out the girl whoâd been up my ass was not only a goddamn soldier, but one that ran around throwing her life away without even bothering to find me.âÂ
You froze.Â
âYou act like Iâve wronged you when itâs the other way aroundâI knew you, you and your little feats on the battlefield, flaunts of strength as though you had no value. As though I wasnât a thought in your mind.âÂ
âIââ
âNo, donât âIâ, shut up. Selfish little shitâso eager to toss your life, because what?âhadnât you heard me when I said âI want you aliveâ? Back in your room when you were obsessed with video games and art? When you told me that secret, and I told you mine?â His words were straining, as though he were struggling to spit them outâto piece them together and coherently present them.
As if he, too, had been alight with anger.Â
â...â
"You told me to cut off frayed links, and I did just that... so donât be angry. I just did what you told me toââ
Your arms wrapped around him in an instant.Â
Your chest was tight. Ragged. You squeezed the words out, though. âIâm... sorry.âÂ
GhostâSimonâwhoever this version of this man just stood, still and quiet, even when a part of you broke.
Just as when you were kids, except this time, there was no silent hope for the future, no yearning for a better past, but the cold and unyielding weight of reality slowly encompassing the two of you.Â
That weight lightened the slightest bit when he reciprocated, arms around you too.
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kĂśnig with a confident/badass reader that knows their shit? đ im so hrrrng for this man i want to fluster him so bad
blackened valor
Summary:Â KĂśnig admires you, so you expose your humanity to him.Â
Tags: soldier!fem!reader (call sign âhoundâ) x kĂśnig, reader implied to be on the older side, smoking, barely edited, mentally ill reader, this might be triggering for those struggling with suicidal thoughts so please be careful/dont read!Â
Word count: 1.1k
Notes: anon we are literally on the same wavelength, i was earlier thinking about a reader who has that dorky badassery of snake or raiden or literally any mgs character LMAO
Not much was known about you beyond your feats on the field.Â
But those feats defined your personhood within any militaryâthe moment a recruiter knew who you were, theyâd be on their knees begging for your presence among theirs.Â
It was like being a celebrity, except you got no perks and more targets on your back and eyes on you every second of the day, trying to break down your character and understandâunderstand what, only God knows.Â
You were fine with that, though; you get used to it after a while: the praise, the envy, it all becomes white noise over the howl of the wind.Â
So it was a normal occurrence when you noticed a set of eyes on you.Â
What was abnormal was the one doing the staring.Â
An Austrian giant.Â
It piqued your interest; a shallow reason to humor since youâve been in this situation numerous times before, but you didnât care.Â
From your seat in the empty lounge, you leaned back, regarding him carefully.
He couldnât meet your stare.Â
Cute.Â
âYou are?â You grabbed a lighter from your pockets, popping out a cheap cigarette at the same time. In a swift motion, the cigarette was alight on your lips, and now it sat between your index and middle finger.Â
âKĂśnig, maâam.âÂ
âMaâam?â You couldnât help the chuckle that spilled out your lips. âIâm âHoundâ to everyone, no need for the formalities, save that for your captain.âÂ
He nodded jerkily. You noted his scrunched shoulders, his stiff poise, and his foot moving in a rhythmic motion. The chair he sat on seemed to bend at the movement.Â
"Hey, câmere.âÂ
In an instant, he did as you said, walking to you quickly.Â
You pat the spot beside you. âSit, no need to sit on that shitty chair. Pretty sure it was about to collapse.âÂ
Nodding again, he sat beside you.Â
You lift your cigarette to him. âWanna?âÂ
KĂśnig shook his head. âI donât.âÂ
âIâd praise you for making such a good health decision, but itâd make me a hypocrite considering you chose to be a merc.â You sighed, taking another puff of smoke. âSpeaking of, whatâs a timid guy like you doinâ in a merc group?â
â...â
âTouchy subject, eh?â You shook your head, laughing again. âItâs always like that with soldiersâitâs either to pay college debt or to run away from some fucked past.âÂ
KĂśnig glanced at you, finally. He held your gaze.Â
âWhat about you, then?âÂ
âMe?â You hummed, leaning forward now with your elbows on your knees, one hand propping your head up while the other held the cigarette. Looking up at him, you smiled. âMoney. Valor. Suitors. Iâm a materialist at heart, I love the attention too. Iâm super fucking vain.âÂ
âThat canât be?âÂ
The way he gasped those words made you grin. He was quickly becoming a favorite. âThen what do you think is the real reason?âÂ
âUhm...â His fingers tapped his knee, and his eyes strayed up, deep in thought. Then, embarrassed, his voice dropped. â...to change the world?â
Despite the clear embarrassment, he said the words with unwavering sureness, and it dawns on you that he probably thought of you as some war heroâa pursuer of all that is good for the world. Â
When you look at himâproperly this time, not an off-handed glanceâyou can see it in his eyes, the shine.Â
You were right.Â
In the past, moments like this would be awkward; you never knew what to say, how to softly break the truth that you were just some woman, and the honest truth wasnât coated in honor and your drive to be a force of good.
But now? You didnât care. You never had.
âI wanted to die,â you said casuallyâand it was a casual admission, you didnât really care, because that was the truth.Â
You saw his eyes widen and it nearly made you laugh.Â
âI was gonna, you know, kill myself when I was younger. Had planned it out and everything,â you sighed wistfully. âThen, I thought, âwhy not join the militaryâ? Easier to break to my family that when I inevitably died, it was for a cause rather than the fact I succumbed to my own perpetual weakness.â
âItâs notââÂ
ââItâs not weaknessâ yeah yeah,â you scoffed. âItâs easy to say that because you feel it. We all feel itâthe desire to die.âÂ
The bottom of his hood shifted again, and you expected to hear his words, but nothing came out.Â
âBut, yeah, I guess after a while of realizing that Iâm cursed with some twisted luck of brushing past the grim reaper, I decided to be a bit of a saint and run around and âfixâ things, just to stave the boredom away.â
You took another puff, longer this time. âYou grow attached to the idea of bringing peace, I think. My advice? If you want to bring the most change, let go of your fear of death. Suddenly, everythingâs not so scary anymore...â you smile. âBut Iâm guessing youâve already done that, havenât you?â
KĂśnig was silent, but after a moment, he nodded.Â
âSee? Now youâre just as much of a âheroâ as me.â You lifted the cigarette. âYou sure you donât want, by the way?âÂ
â...Iâll try.â His hands were large, dwarfing the cigarette to a ridiculous degree.Â
With his free hand, he lifted the end of his hood, and you caught a bit of his face.Â
Pretty.Â
He sucked in and began coughing right after, lowering the cigarette for a moment. Clumsy puffs of smoke shot out his lips, and after a few seconds, he tried again.Â
Still awkward, but a bit better.Â
âAh, youâre getting there KĂśnig, now youâre just as much of a hero as me!â You reached for the cigarette and took a puff before handing it back.Â
He paused before putting it back between his lips, but you notice a flush of pink dusting his pale skin. Even with just the bottom of his face showing, you could see he was... blushing?Â
That made you bark out a laugh.Â
Heâs so fucking shy.
He seemed to have caught on quickly because he quickly moved the cigarette back to you, refusing to meet your eyes, tugging the hood back over his face. Â
âCome on soldier, donât be shy! Weâre all friends here, right?â You leaned back and pat his shoulder. âUnless..?âÂ
He froze under your hand.Â
You laughed again, letting your hand rest there. He didnât push it away, remaining stiff under your palm, head turned away and fingers fiddling with gloves wrapped around his hands.Â
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a good shot
Summary:Â KĂśnig had a staring problem, so you confront him about it.Â
Tags: sniper!fem!reader x konig, platonic!141 x reader, barely edited, awkward, unintentional confession(?)
Word count: 1.1k
Note: my mw2 obsession is real. been trying to deny it but its all that occupies my brain.... send some reqs?? i have such a bad habit of saying that then not following thru but i promise i will LMFAOOO (nah but fr tho im working on ur guysâ requests, just veryyyy slowly since, again, mw2 brainrot) also sorry if this seems rushed, i just wanted to get this idea out of my head hehe
KĂśnig had a staring problem.Â
You really didnât know why, but whenever he was near, you could practically feel his gaze burn a hole through your skin.Â
You werenât one to care for staresâyou were used to it, especially in your early years as a merc. Most would just be curious why a woman was wearing a bullet vest, especially civilians.Â
But... KĂśnigâs eyes were intense. Nothing like the curiousâor even hatefulâlooks you were used to.Â
You were sure you hadnât done anything wrong; you barely spoke, never really caring too. You kept to yourself. You didnât particularly stand out next to your flamboyant peers.Â
So... why?Â
Youâd first asked Soap about it: he was a people person, always seemed to know someoneâs intentions in an instant.Â
However, he was confused. âHe stares at you?âÂ
"You hadnât noticed?âÂ
âNo? I barely see the lad in general, always skulkinâ in some shadow.âÂ
âSeriously?â You frowned. âThen you think youâd know why?â
âHmmm... here, maybe if I get my crystal ball and ponder for a bit I can find out!âÂ
"Shove the ball up your ass instead.â You snorted. Soap laughed, probably at his own joke than yours.Â
Getting up, you headed to your next target: Ghost.Â
You found him in the mess hall, taking apart his rifle on one of the cafeteria tables by himself. Without a second thought, you slid beside him. He didnât acknowledge you.
Propping your head up with a hand, you look at him. Despite it being night, heâs still wearing his balaclava and shades. You decided itâs best not to make a comment about it since youâre trying to pry answers regarding the Austrian Colossus.Â
âYouâve noticed KĂśnig staring at me, right?âÂ
âYeah. Why?âÂ
âDo you think youâd know why? Iâm sure I hadnât done anything to piss him off, but heâs always just... you know...â you widen your eyes, leaning in. âDoing this. I donât know whether to be unsettled or flattered.âÂ
Ghost carefully puts two pieces of his rifle together, a satisfying click resonating in the air. âMaybe heâs surprised why the 141 got a clown for a sniper.â He intoned.Â
âSays the guy wearing a skeleton balaclava and tinted shadesâscared the enemies are gonna find out youâre actually just a loser with nothing to his name?â You said the words too quickly, and when Ghost looked at you, he probably knew the thought was bubbling in your head.Â
"...âÂ
â...âÂ
You couldnât help the laugh that crawled out your throat, and you noticed that the corners of Ghostâs eyes crinkled.Â
â...So you donât know?âÂ
He snorted. âIâm no psychic.âÂ
Sighing, you rose from your seat, leaving Ghost once more in his own bubble.Â
You really didnât want to, but you realized you were gonna have to ask from the source itselfâKĂśnig. Â
Now, you didnât consider yourself a shy or anxious person, but there was something so imposing about KĂśnig; maybe it was the fact he literally towers over you like some Goliath, or maybe itâs the fact he only speaks in raspy monosyllables, or, maybe, it was the fact that he just always stares at you, but you couldnât deny the nervousness that writhed in the pit of your stomach.Â
But curiosity shined over it, because just why would he just stare?Â
So, you decided to head to the shooting field: it was an open secret that KĂśnig often lurked there at night, shooting away at the targets from the day. No one really complained since heâd replace the targets with new ones at the end of every session.
The walk was short; just a quick turn through some halls and out through a door and youâre in the range.Â
KĂśnig was some meters away, hunched over a stack of crates and a sniper under his arm. His back was to you.Â
You stepped on a stray stick just beside your foot. His head shot up.Â
He turned around in an instant, sniper tight in his hand.Â
They were right. Heâs antsy.Â
âHey, KĂśnig.âÂ
â...âÂ
You slowly approached as though he were a frightful deer... but perhaps a cautious bear would be a more accurate descriptor. He could kill you in seconds.Â
Like anyone can. It doesnât scare you.Â
Admittedly, itâs a little exciting.
âCan I talk to you about something?âÂ
â...yes.âÂ
 âYour eyesâuh, you stare. A lot.âÂ
His gaze flickered away.Â
âJust wondering why you just... stare. Iâm pretty sure weâve never spoken, eitherââ
âWeâve spoken,â he cut in. Rough and light, as usual. âMostly on missions though.âÂ
âOh... well, Iâm just wondering if I pissed you off, somehow? Earned your ire? Iâm dumb, I forget and I can be socially unawareââ
âNo, no, no!â His eyes rounded, the sniper loosened in his hands. âNo, you didnât! I just, well...â
â...well?â You echoed, prompting him to continue.Â
He did.Â
âYouâre nice to look at.â
Your brain froze.Â
Oh.Â
Oh.Â
âIâm sorry, is that weird?âit is, isnât it? I apologize, Iââ
âNo, wait, Iâm really flattered, I justââ you laugh breathlessly. In disbelief. âThatâs just really fucking flattering.â You can feel your face light up with heat, and all the neat composure youâve built wash away completely.Â
Now, youâre reduced to a blushing schoolgirl at a complete loss for words.Â
What were you supposed to say? What does that even mean? Is that an admission of some crush, or were you just eye candy to him?âand did you like that, like his attention or are you just that deprived of contact?Â
You force your eyes to his, and you realize heâs hunched over, rubbing at the metal butt of his sniper with a thumb, eyes everywhere except on yours.Â
"So...â you rubbed your wrist. âWhat now?â
He finally looked at you. âHuh?â
You were this far already, you werenât gonna back down yet. Even if your heart was slamming against your chest. âYou just called me pretty? And I have a feeling youâre easy on the eyes tooâmaybe this is too quickâbut wanna hang out then? Like, talk and stuff... because... Iâm pretty?â
KĂśnig stared for a moment before breaking into a laugh. âIt would be an honor.âÂ
âThen letâs hang out right now! Stay here, Iâm gonna grab my sniper and weâre gonna shoot shit till bulletsâre covering the ground!!âÂ
KĂśnig extended his sniper. âUse mine. I want to see how you shoot.â His eyes fluttered, gaze awkwardly averting yet again. You were beginning to find it endearing. âYouâre a good shot. And Iâd like to get better.âÂ
âAnd watching me will help you?â
âYes,â he said the word with earnest, eyes bright.Â
A crooked smile pulled at your lips. Fuck, you werenât used to this.Â
But you liked it. You liked it a lot. You just hoped you could eventually make him feel the same.Â
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accursed flesh (2/2)
PART ONE
Summary: The intricate side effects of the pact is hard to keep control of. You try to do so anyway.
Tags: Geralt x Witcher!Reader, jealousy, NO yennefer slander, reader kinda implied to have depression (subtext and all), hurt/comfort i think??? also a smidge of a power imbalance if you squint, unedited
Tag list: @abrunettefangirlnerdâ
Word count: 2.3k
Note: this fic wont make sense AT ALL if u dont check part one, so i seriously encourage you to do so!! ALSOâŚ. im thinking that this au could possibly be an ongoing thing for some future oneshots?? itâs always fun to see when blogs have a certain like âin jokeâ thing but instead of a joke itâs a fic au, if that makes sense?? sooooo, as usual, feel free to shoot me a request/dm if u have any ideas, even if itâs unrelated to this au!!
Itâs been a few weeks since you had formed that pact with Geralt.
Maybe you were just looking to deep into itâperhaps your mind is running rampant in itâs imagination now that your thoughts arenât plagued by the perpetual pain that lit your nervesâbut there was a strange shift in the relationship you had with the White Wolf.Â
Before, he was a very distant figure. Not too distantâhe was always within reach, just a few words away, but you were too much of a coward to say those words.Â
Itâs strange, how your envy of him had quickly shifted to shameful feelings, and you often wondered if the person you were so attached to was just a concept; a figment of what you wanted.Â
But now, those ponderings were satisfied with how much closer heâs gotten.
You blame it on the effects of the pactâbeing tied to someone by soul, it carries weight, no?Â
He talks more, a few extra words being passed throughout the day instead of a sentence or two being exchanged at night in the mess hall.Â
His eyes were warmer, not so guarded as before.Â
And, most strangely, his voice carried a cadence of care. Connection. It was a hard thing to describe.Â
You also felt your guard melt away when youâre near, a serenity that you thought you had lost in childhood. (Again, you blamed that on the pact.)
However, not everything was sunshine and rainbowsâthere was a few intricacies that have left you... reeling, to say the least.Â
The pact, it allows for a mental connection between the two parties: a telepathy that can be accessed wheneverâand the same applies to emotion.Â
Geralt was a natural at navigating thisâyou hadnât heard a single thought of his or emotion unless it was intentional.Â
You, however? Youâve made a fool of yourself several times already.Â
The first time was when Lambert was bugging you about something. Although you feigned calm, your mind was chatty.Â
âIf he keeps this up Iâm gonna hide his swords again.âÂ
A whispery voice that sounded like Geraltâs echoed in your head. âYou were the one to hide his swords?â Amusement colored his words, and you could feel the emotion flutter in your head.Â
âOh, fuck? Wait, sorry, I didnât admit thatâno, I didnât do that. Sorry. Sorry. How do I stop the connection?âÂ
âWonât tell you.âÂ
âHey, you even listening?â Lambertâs voice was the thing to snap you out the stupor.Â
âYeah, yeah, I am.â You snapped. âDumbass.âÂ
You werenât. At all.
Another time, Vesemir allowed for you to cook your favorite mealâa fine dish you learned from a maid in Toussaint.Â
Usually the Witchers just make their own meals throughout the day when theyâre hungry, and itâs only at night when they eat together, so thatâs when you cooked.Â
So you made the meal and intentionally made a lot. You wanted the others to eat itâwhich added some pressure, but you knew you could nail it.
And you did! It came out perfectly!
When you plated it and handed it to the othersâof course maintaining the act of âmistake in quantityâ, they took it and ate.Â
It was dumb in your eyes, but watching them eatâit made you happy. As though you were paying a debt you didnât even know you had. A phantom weight that lightened just by a fraction, but still lightened nonetheless.Â
Geraltâs voice spoke in your head. It was light. Soothing. âDidnât know watching others eat made you so happy.âÂ
You lowered your head over the bowl, eating a little faster.Â
A soft laugh bounced in your mind. It made you warmer than you already were. âNot a bad thing. Itâs a good trait to have.â
Then, the same night, you slipped up again when Vesemir and Eskiel complimented the dishâLambert did so too, in his own... unique way. Â
âIt wasnât terrible,â Lambert said, returning from the kitchen with his third serving. âItâs acceptable. Better than the raw meat old man Vesemir had us eat.âÂ
And this time, instead of talking, Geraltâwho was sitting beside youâbrushed a hand against your arm.Â
No one noticed except you.Â
Sneaky bastard.Â
But, now, you were a lot more confident in your ability to reign it in despite Geralt having held back the information.Â
Well, that was until Yennefer had paid a visit.Â
Sheâd come in order to help Vesemir with the reconstruction of the wall as a return of favor for Geralt. âHer telekinesis could be of use,â heâd said before sending off a carrier pigeon a few weeks back.Â
And in all respects, you didnât mindânot at all! You admired the sorceress deeplyâsheâs intelligent and she can get work done and get her hands dirty if circumstances demand it. Whatâs there to hate?Â
Nothing at all!Â
But, you werenât blind to the way she looked at Geralt.Â
And you couldnât even blame herâthey had a past; a romantic one. You were just a distant friend of his up until recently.Â
But jealousy was a searing thing, alongside self-disgust. You werenât used to them. They burned, as though they were phantom pain of your lulled mutagens.Â
However, those feelings were irrationalâwrong. Being possessive over a man who wasnât even yours wasnât something you wanted to partake in.Â
You didnât ever want to be the thing that removes happiness from someone. And in the end? All you can do is hope that, one day, you can get over your... crush. Even if it hurt. Burned you alive. Colored every passing thought.Â
So, you were amicable. No use in being a bitch to someone for no reason beyond your own selfish desire.Â
âHey Yennefer, howâre you holding up in Vizima? Heard working for the emperor is demanding?âÂ
She sighed, lifting a pack of rubble with magic, just as Vesemir instructed. âIt isâbut Iâm in my element. Plus, the coin is generous, I certainly canât complain.âÂ
You smiled. âIâm gladââ you cut yourself off when you felt Geraltâs presence. He was walking towards Yennefer. Nodding to her, you spoke brightly. âGood luck, hopefully we can divulge in deeper conversation later?â
She smiled. âYes, see you.âÂ
Withdrawing from her side, you made a beeline to Vesemir who was pouring concrete into one of the holes of the wall with knitted brows.
Carefully, you set a hand under the large tin pale, steadying his grip on it.
He didnât say anything, but he cast you a grateful look.
Trying to focus the task at handâthat is, steadying the pale since you knew if you tried to fill the walls yourself heâd get mad because youâre not âdoing it rightâ (apparently no one can do it right except him)âyou couldnât seem to block out the pair behind you, who were speaking so fucking softly to each other.
Brazen jealousy seared your skin, and then, a cold, hushing feeling of condemnation followed after.
âAnyway,â Yennefer began softly, âwant to do anything after?â Hey words were thick with desire. You desperately wanted to block the words out. You tried focusing on Vesemir muttering about how some of the concrete splattered on his shoes, or the distant shrieks of crows, or the windâanything!
But you couldnât.
You expected Geralt to accept, to demand that heâd be able to whisk her away the moment sheâs done helping Vesemirâfuck, maybe even cut the visit to Kaer Morhen short and go back to Vizima together to stay with Ciri for the remainder of winter or something.
After all, Yennefer is the obvious choice; superior. Some lowly, scarred female Witcher or the alluring sorceress? You werenât mad at the fact, because it was that: fact. And you couldnât reverse rolesâand in a way, you didnât want to. You liked being a Witcher. You liked being youâflaws, memories, hate. It was yours.
Again, you needed to get over him, even if he was the only man to ever reveal the colors that love grantsâ
âNo, I have some things that need to be done,â Geralt responded.
âAh, I see.â Yennefer didnât sound angry, though a note of displeasure marked her words.
You expected Geralt to apologize, but he didnât.
It confused you, but you felt a guilty relief that he declined.
You were blind to Geraltâs gaze, which was firmly planted on you.
---
The holes were patched up and Yennefer sent a swift farewell to everyone, citing âCiri needing a capable babysitterâ as the reason.
You werenât inclined to assume it was a lie, youâd witnessed first hand how rowdy the girl was.
It was night when she left, and youâd felt tired (probably because you ended up patching up the walls yourself after insisting for Vesemir to take a break) and you decided to going back to your room and occupy yourself with the mountains of books you hadnât had the time to read, or polish your blades and prepare oils and potions.
As you were ascending the staircase that led to your room, Geraltâs voice emerged from your head like gold found in mist.
âWhere are you?â
âI was just about to go to my room, why?â
âWant to talk to you, thatâs all.â
âOh⌠you wanna meet somewhere orâ?â
âYour rooms fine, if youâre okay with that.â
There was a strange tension. It worried you.
But you shot down the anxiety. You were being irrational yet again.
âYeah, of course!â
You quickly bounded to your room and tried to clean up the small pieces of chaos scattered throughout, straightening everything up until a sharp knock on your door halted you.
âCome in!â
In stepped, as you expected, Geralt. Shed of all armor, all he wore was a simple shirt, pants, and boots. His hair was down, too.
You didnât know why, but despite the fact that youâve seen him like that numerous times before, it was weird now. Intimate, almost.
You stood there awkwardly, unsure. âHey.â
Geralt shut the door behind him and leaned against the wood, arms crossed. His body language was hard to decipher, a mix of comfortable and guarded.
âI donât like mincing words, so Iâll be blunt: I like you.â
Your brain couldnât seem to process those words.
âYou⌠do?â you choked out, confused, shocked, and in complete disbelief.
âYeah, I do. Like you a lot, actually. And I know you feel the same,â he smiled. âHard not to when your emotions get all sharp when a womanâs near me.â
âYou mean Yennefer?âIâm sorry, I didnâtââ
âItâs fine, donât apologizeâyour heart, itâs a kind thing. Havenât met much people whoâd prioritize others the way you do.â He sighed. âThough, I donât like how itâs from guiltâor hate.â
âBetter than being selfish, right?â You murmured.
âWhatâs selfish to you, then?â
âPutting myself above others obviouslyââ
âAnd you do that by?â
âBy wanting something that isnât mine, by feeling things thatâre wrong, byââ
âBy feeling emotions? By doubting the capability and maturity of others by assuming that you need to lock your heart away so you wouldnât offend?â
ââŚwhen you word it like that, it sounds dumb.â
âBecause it is. Because your worry of beingâno, âappearingâ selfish hinders you in so many ways.â His voice softens, and he takes a step forward, arms unfolded. âThere are times to be restrained, but there are many other times to be open with yourself.â
âSorryââ
âDonât apologize, there was never a need to.â
You sit on the edge of your bed, shoulders sagging.
Quietly, Geralt sits beside you. The bed creaks the slightest bit.
ââŚIâve liked you for a long time.â
âItâs an honor.â
âCan I tell you a secret?â
âHm?â
âWhenever I have my down daysâyou know, can barely get out of bed, horizons were dark, you get itâIâd imagine you.â
You tentatively leaned against his shoulder, hesitant. He pulled you in, confident, arm wrapped around your shoulders.
âIâd think, if you could keep your head up, then I think I can too. Even if itâs hard. Even if I want to test my head clean off my shoulders.â Your eyes fluttered shut for a moment, and the candle of in your room seemed to flicker, dimming. âI admire you.â
âIâm a wrong person to admire,â his fingers tightened around you the slightest bit. âBut I donât mind.â
âHeh, glad you donât⌠butâŚâ
He glanced at you. You realize really liked his eyes.
âWhat about you?â Your voice strained slightly. âI hope you didnât develop feelings just âcause the pact kinda has us bound now...âÂ
He shook his head. âNo, of course not. It sounds ridiculous, but Iâve always liked youâjust never thought anything would come of it... after all, two Witchers? Together?â His eyes strayed to the candle. âIt was cowardly, but I tried to snuff those feelings. Thought nothing good would ever come of it.â
âWouldnât call it cowardly. I think youâre right, but now? With us being pact-bound, I think weâve a better chance at this whole... thing.â
âThing?âÂ
"I mean, like, this. What are we now? Are we courting? Married?âÂ
âYou want to be married?â
â...wouldnât be opposed.âÂ
âThen weâre married.âÂ
âWhat?â
âIâll get you a ring later whenââ
âWait hold on! Look, I donât think marriage is a good label, because as much as I like the sound of that, itâs too... domestic. Tame.â
Geralt let out a throaty laugh. âGood point. Got any ideas, then?âÂ
âWhat about weâre... uh... Pact-mates? Soulmates? There really isnât a good word for it...â
âDonât think it needs to be defined then. All that matters is Iâm yours, just as you are mine.âÂ
Your cheeks lit aflame at that. He laughed again.Â
You liked that, and you liked it a lot. And this time, you intentionally allowed for the sickly sweet feeling of your warmth poke Geralt.Â
He did the same.Â
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accursed flesh (1/2)
PART TWO
Summary: You are the only female Witcher in existence, and you are suffering because of it.
Tags: Geralt x Witcher!Reader, headcanon format, blood, death, descriptions of pain, reader implied not to be european/not petite, reader implied to be younger than the others, unedited, etc.
Word count:Â 2.6k
Note: this idea has been poking me, but can u blame me? the entire concept is so fascinating!! also been craving to write something in a headcanon format since its so fun and easy LMAO; also to quickly add, this takes place BEFORE the events of witcher 3, but not too far before! AND, as usual, sorry for the wonky writing/lowkey ooc-ness of the characters, this is something super self indulgent and i just wanted to get it on paperÂ
It was a dreary winter in Kaer Morhen. The cold hit you right in the bones, deeper than a basilisk's claws.Â
Your body was weakening. The mutagensâthey were eating you alive. Writhing under your skin, burning the blood in your body and always leaving you in a state of constant pain. And that winter frost certainly wasnât helping.Â
But you tried your best to stay lightâthe atmosphere within the stone walls was already quite... unsavory.Â
Lambert was still pissy about the facial scar heâs gotten, especially since Vesemir is insistent on using it as a learning lesson.
Vesemir was also pissy because Lambert wouldnât stop imitating him and taking his vintage hat as a prop.Â
Eskiel had wooed a womanâa surprise to everyoneâbut had then found out that not only was the woman a succubus, but one that had a vendetta against Witchers and had aimed to kill him.Â
And Geralt...Â
He didnât divulge in the detailsâor anything, actually. All he mentioned was that the roads were rockier and coin was thinner and harder to come across.
You tried your best to be a positive force, but it was proving to be difficult. Especially now.Â
Youâd failed in your quest to find an antidote to your slow degradation, and due to that failure, your body was starting to gray. Patches of skin were starting to rot.Â
It soundedâno, isâhorrifying. But youâve given up. And you hadnât the heart to tell the others thatâfuck, you didnât even know if they were aware of what was happening.Â
Only Vesemir knew, probably. You noticed his sad stare. It sickened you.Â
However, at night, it was easy to pretend nothing was amiss. That everything was as it should be, because mead was thick in the menâs blood.
Eskiel was beside you, while Lambert and Geralt were sitting across the large log table. Bottles upon bottles of all types of alcohol were strewn.Â
You didnât have the luxury to drinkâyou found it irritated your already irritated mutagens. So you settled with juice, something that drunken Lambert took note of.Â
âHey... donât tell me youâre becoming Vesemir...â he slurred before breaking to a grin. Grabbing the vintage hat heâd clearly grown fond of stealing from Vesemir, he put it on with a flick of his wrist. ââAlcohol is a Witcherâs enemy. It steals your senses, robs you of logicâtwo things a Witcher needs to survive!ââ
Eskiel snorted, the closest to a real laugh youâve seen him choke out.Â
âYeah, actually havenât ever seen you drink,â Geralt spoke from Lambertâs side. His eyes were prying. âNot fond of alcohol?âÂ
A wry smile twisted your lips. âYou could say that.âÂ
âNo, wait, Geralt, your right!â Lambertâs words turned loud. âYouâre totally right! Iâve never ever seen her drink either! And Iâve never met a Witcher that doesnât fuckinâ like mead!â
âDonât get hung up on it, Lambert. Too much thinkingâll make your head hurt.â You scoffed, taking a swing of your raspberry juice.Â
Lambert spluttered. Thank God heâs drunk, because if he wasnât, youâre sure he wouldâve insulted you in a way you didnât think was possible.Â
âBut anyway, any good things happened to you guys? Aside from cruel succubiâmy condolences, Eskielâand shitty contracts?âÂ
âMy yearâs been quiet aside from that,â Eskiel muttered.Â
Lambert chimed in, nearly slumped over the table. âSame âere, but I also met some Witchers from another school... they were assholes...â
âItâs a shame every person you meet turns out to be an asshole.â You couldnât stop the sarcasm that laced your words, but he didnât seem to notice, instead taking yet another bottle and clumsily pouring it into his mug.Â
âWhat about you, Geralt?âand donât try to sell me on the âquiet roadsâ bullshit, youâre always up to somethingâwhat king have you been fraternizing with this time?â What sorceress have you been trying to lay with lately?
Geralt paused, his face contemplative. You could imagine snapshots of memories flashing in his head, each one packed with layers of action and tension, and after a few moments of that quiet, he finally spoke.Â
âCanât think of anything. Sorry.âÂ
Before you could press him further, he turned the tables onto you.Â
âWhat about you though? You didnât say much.âÂ
âYou didnât say anything at all, actually.â Eskiel noted, sparing you only a quick glance before being immersed in his drink the same way Lambert was.Â
âI...âÂ
You were a shit liarâthe school of Wolves were all shit liars frankly, and the worst part was that they could catch those same lies too in a heartbeat.
 âWell... Itâs complicated.âÂ
âThe night is young,â Geralt murmured. âWe donât have much else to do except drink.â
âYeah... well...â Fuck.Â
A part of you wanted them to know, but you knew the moment they were aware of your decline, theyâd do anything to try to reverse it, just as you would with them.Â
Again, Wolves. The school was a pack, and it would be hypocritical of you not to want them to worry if you would react the exact same. Â
Especially Geralt. Youâd burn countries if it meant helping him.Â
âBeen trying to fix a few things.â Were the words you settled with.Â
âWhat things? And were you able to do so?âÂ
âPersonal things, and... unfortunately not.â You stared at the contents of the mug in your hand, your reflection distorted. Uncertain. âItâs too late.âÂ
Geralt hummed at that. âNeed help?âÂ
The words were so simple, and somehow, it left you silent, as though he asked something grand, something completely philosophical and abstract. It left you stunned, strangelyâdespite being confident that Geralt has your back, thereâs an absurdity to it.
Youâd help me?
He didnât say anything, simply looking at you with what seemed to be a reassuring look. A silent, underlying, muted warmth. Or maybe you were just imagining itâfuck, you didnât know what to think.
And then, it hit you:
You were going to die anyway.
Doesnât that allow you to be a little selfish?
âYeah, I think I need an extra set of hands.â You couldnât look at him in the eyes. âThank you.â
âItâs no problem at all, really.â
âJeez, get a roomâurp!â Lambert nearly keeled over. âFuck! Is it jusâ me or is the room getting a little wonky..?â
Eskiel sighed, getting up from where he was and walking to Lambert. âGuess I need to be his caretaker again.â He grabbed Lambert, forcing him on his feet. Before he could sway and fall, he threw his arm over his shoulder. âGood night you two.â
âGood night,â you smiled.
Geralt nodded to him. âNight.â
And just like that, they were gone.
Geralt looked to you expectantly.
âI know somethingâs wrong. My medallionâs been humming ever since you came. Is this something to do with your issue?â
âYeah, uh⌠Look, Iâm not gonna mince words,â looking at him, your voice was resolute. âIâm dying. I think by the end of the winter, my spiritâll be long gone.â
The smallest flashes of emotion that appeared on his face died seconds later.
âI thought the complications with the mutagens..?â
âThey never went awayâthey got worse, actually.â You frowned. âI spent the year searching, and there was no antidote. Itâs likeâyou know how your body gets influenced in certain ways by mutagens? Kind of warps your body and tissue, becomes a part of you?â
Geralt nodded.
âYour body, it sustains itâmenâs body naturally do, because of muscle mass and shit like that. Biological differences. According to some druids, the only reason I got past the main steps to becoming a Witcher as a kid was just âcause I worked in the farm a lot more and gained more muscles due to that and geneticsâŚâ A humorless laugh tore from your throat. âArenât I special?â
Geraltâs eyes averted to the drink he nursed in his hands.
âBut yes, because my body isnât strong enough to sustain and create harmony with the mutagens Iâve been infused with, the mutagens became embedded in my biological matter and have become a plague that wishes to only eat at my body till thereâs nothing left.â
You pulled up your thick sleeve to reveal a thick circle of rot. Your natural complexion abruptly cuts to an unnatural dark miasma of a purplish-black with the smallest veins of a deep green and a blood-red. It resembled the skin of a rotting horse carcass.
You laughed again. âTo be honest, now that I say it out loud? I donât think I need help, Itâs just too lateââ
âDonât say that. Iâll help you.â
âGeraltââ
âI refuse to let you die.â His eyes burned. His face, although controlled, betrayed some emotion with how the muscles of his jaw seemed to knot, how his brows furrowed, his lips pushed downward to a bitter frown. âWhy did you keep this a secret?â
Suddenly, the ânot to worry you guysâ explanation didnât hold water.Â
You knew there was a reasonâthere just had to be, right?âbut you couldnât find one, one that you could confidently say out loud that didnât betray the part of your mind youâd long since exiled from your consciousness.Â
You smiled. âDunno. Too many reasons, too little will.âÂ
Geraltâs frown deepened. The look made you anxiousâbut not in a way that you were fearful of himâno, never, not Geralt. Never Geralt.Â
But rather, the anxiousness and guilt that you know you disturbed the little peace of mind he had. The comfort that coming to Kaer Morhen was meant to provide.
âWe need to fix this. Iâll tell Vesemir, Iâm sure heâd know somethingââ
âDonât!â
âWhat?âÂ
âDonât, Geralt. Please.â
âWhy?âÂ
âBecause you just canât. This is why I didnât want to tell you, you guys get worked up andââ
âYouâre dying and you expect usâmeânot to get âworked upâ?â He said the words as though they were nonsenseâas if he couldnât detect a lick of sense behind it. âYouâre rotting, and you expect me to just sit down and do nothing?â
âIâI donât know, listen, Geralt, I donât mindââÂ
âIâm not listening. This topic is over. I will help you, whether you want that help or not.âÂ
You chewed on the skin of your lips.
His voice softened. âAt dawn, weâll meet and talk to Vesemir. Iâll make sure the other two donât know, if you want.âÂ
â...yeah. Thank you.âÂ
---
It was right at dawn when you and Geralt met with Vesemir in the training hall.Â
Geralt was the one to provide the information of what was happening since you couldnât seem to find the verbal coherence to do so yourself.Â
When he finished, Vesemir sighed deeply.Â
âI simply wish youâd come to me sooner, child.âÂ
Your ears burned but you maintained your poker face. Child.Â
âCan you show me the... ârotâ?âÂ
You obliged, revealing the festering rot your left arm.
Although it was just a small movementâalmost imperceptibleâyou noticed the way his eyes widened the slightest bit.Â
You were completely fucked if it took Vesemir of all people by surprise.Â
âIâve never seen anything like this...âÂ
âAt least Iâll leave a mark on history in my own way: âfirst female Witcher, dies of perpetual rot!â Hope my nameâs the label for this illness.âÂ
Vesemir ignored you. So did Geralt, but you werenât blind to the quick glance he gave you. âI can only think of one way that could perhaps ceaseâor better yet, reverse this, and itâs if we can pry the mutagens out of your body.â
"Thatâs impossible. Doesnât the Trial of Grasses make it impossible to do that?â
âYes, unfortunately... but thereâs hope. Perhaps the mutagens you have now could be swapped with a weaker set, letting your body overpower and take control.âÂ
âAnd howâd we do that?âÂ
Vesemir paused.Â
Geralt was the one to speak, and he spoke slowly. Quietly. âAnother Trial of Grasses..?â
âNo, no, noâfuck no.â You stepped back, glaring at Geralt. âIâd rather die than go through that again!â
Geralt crossed his arms, brows furrowed slightly. âI doubt it would work⌠her bodyâs grown and the mutagens had long since become ingrained in her, right?â
Vesemir frowned, nodding. âYes, but itâs the only way.â
âIâm not doing this. Youâre not gonna make me do this. Thereâs no way in any circumstance youâll make me commit to this. No. Donât even try.â
âThen you have any ideas?â Geralt glared at you. âBecause Iâm not just gonna let you die.â
âFuck if I know! Look, I donât mind, at all! Itâd be nice to die on my bed than in battleââ
âDonât be selfish!â He snapped. âYouâre not gonna die. Not now, not in a hundred years.â
Conviction bled in his words. You fell silent.
He turned to Vesemir once more. âAre you sure there arenât any alternatives? Something less intensive?â
Vesemir rubbed his chin with a hand. âI can think of something, but itâs requires a lot more timeâforming a pact with someone with equal or greater powerâsomeone who has the same or similar mutagens to hers.â
âSo I gotta find a basilisk and form a pact with it? To be honest, I donât want my soul companion to be the same things Iâm meant to slayââ
âIâll do it.â
Your brain froze for a second.
You glanced at Geralt.
âWhat?â
âIâll form a pact with you, if youâd likeâbetter than a basilisk, right?â
âYouâd do that?â With someone like me?
A small smile pulled at his lips for a second.Â
Your heart twisted in deep warmth, and for a second in time, the impenetrable cold and gloom of your mind bathed in that momentary spark.Â
Vesemir clasped his hands together. âThatâs perfect! If this goes as according to plan, the rot should at least cease the festeringâhopefully, it even heals over! But right now, letâs focus on the pactâboth of you, draw some blood.Â
Geralt took the dagger hung at his waist and drew a quick line of blood on the palm of his hand.Â
He offered you the blade. You took it gratefully.Â
Drawing a line for yourself on your hand, you nodded to Vesemir. âDone.âÂ
âNow both of you, hold hands.âÂ
You did as instructed, taking Geraltâs hand and clutching it tightly. It was warm. You couldnât look at him in the eyes.Â
Though you couldâve sworn you heard a breathless laugh from him.Â
âNow, two of you, repeat after me: âwith time shall it come, chimes of dark bells, synchronous melody that forms two into One. We shall become One.ââ Â
In tandem, you and Geralt echoed the words.Â
A beat later, something strange took over you; an out of body experience, something that seemed to rip you of your senses for a moment and left you breathlessâas if your body was robbed, and your spirit was all that was left to exist.Â
In that same beat, pieces of your mind seemed to snap into something foreign, something completely unfamiliarâfeelings, memories, thoughts, ideas... they changed, eclipsed into a thing both familiar but distant. Icy but full of warmth.Â
And, instantaneously, the pains of your bodyâthey ebbed, weakened, and diminished.Â
The pain was dead. The ache scrubbed clean from your limbs. You were whole.Â
When you regained your bearings, you couldnât stifle the giddy laugh that jumped out your throat, the newfound energy coursing through you like that of a mountainâs great river. âFuck that feels good, I actually feel my age!âÂ
Vesemir pointed to something. âYour arm, child. Itâs...â
You look down to your left arm.Â
Itâs miraculously healedâskin smooth and in full color.
You grin became impossibly bigger. âOh my God!â You turned to Geralt who had seemed to have regained his senses. âThank you Geralt, thank you so, so, so much!âÂ
He smiled. It struck warmth in you, and at that moment, you were sure he felt it too. Â
Note: I have some ideas for the part 2 (where the actual romance actually happens LMAO) but if you guys have any, drop by in the ask or dm me 𼳠orrr, if you want to request a geralt fic, DO SO!! wpuld love to get some geralt requests hehehhehehehheeh
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so you know the gus boxcutter scene right? can I request some hurt/comfort of what happens after that? like maybe we help clean the blood off gus's face??
bloodied promise
Summary: Gustavoâs face was splattered with blood, so you clean it off.Â
Word count: 0.4k
Warnings: Blood, spoilers for season 4 ep 1 of breaking bad
Note: i didnt do any hurt/comfort cuz i didnt know how to implement it in this scenario :( but thank you for requesting! also, i love the gus requests, keep them coming, but i also do other characters, guys!! check the pinned post for the characters i accept :DÂ
âFuck, Gustavo, whyâd you do that?âÂ
It was a rhetorical question really, you were no foolâGustavo hates liabilities, which is ironic considering Walter White is a walking, talking liabilityâbut still, the brutality of it all, the goddamn spectacle of it, you canât help but wonder if it was something else.Â
Silent warning? A show of anger? Something deeper?Â
But Gustavo didnât answer, opting to ignore you and take off the bloodied hazmat suit in that silence.Â
You glance at the open door.
Walter and Jesse were gone, alongside Mike.Â
You were alone with him.Â
Good, finally.Â
Grabbing the kleenex box that was on top of one of the shelves, you snagged several sheets of tissue and waited for him to toss away the suit.Â
Still silent, he turned to you.Â
He lifted his chin, angling it to the side, staring at you.Â
âWish you were a little more careful, or, I donât know, de-weeding the source of the problem,â you carefully lifted the tissues, carefully dabbing away the bigger beads of blood that decorated his face. âBut do what you want. But, if push comes to shove, and I know heâs to do something to you, IâllââÂ
âDonât worry,â he cut in with words that held no emotionâalmost listless in its nature. âI already have plans arranged. All I need you to do is to watch quietly from a distance.âÂ
Quietly. Distance.Â
Those two words cannot be applied to you, and somehow, you knew he was aware of thatâsome part of you just fucking knew he recognized what he asked was an impossible request from you, but⌠youâre always cutting past the impossible, right?
Carelessly tossing the tissues to the groundâan action that made you immediately assure Gustavo that it will be cleaned upâyou grabbed another set of tissues and were rougher, dragging it across the smaller lines of blood that lined his strangely warm skin.Â
You were absorbed in the action, cleaning his face with inexplicable care, one that made you realize later was strangely⌠intimate?Â
âOkay,â you breathed, taking a step back, now acutely aware of how close you wereâcloser than youâve ever been. âIâm done. Weâre done. Your face is clean, Gus.â He didnât say anything. You looked up at him now. âGus?âÂ
He was staring at you, and for a moment, you thought something was wrongâdid you miss a spot? Is there blood behind his ear, somehowâ?Â
He grabbed a tissue and with a silent tenderness wiped at your cheek.Â
There was blood on it?
âYou were too close,â he said quietly. âYouâre always too close.âÂ
âIâm sorry.â You didnât mean it.Â
And again, strangely, you felt like he knew.Â
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this might sound dumb but can I request something specific for gus?? maybe with this scenario? : everytime the reader says goodbye to gus they pat his shoulder before leave â but one day when they're saying goodbye to eachother the reader doesn't pat his shoulder and he notices; You can continue up to this point :)
hand in hand
Summary: Gustavo notices something strange about your farewell.Â
Word count: 0.3k
Warnings: None
Note: had to think a little to see what would be the most in-character reaction from gus for this LMAO---also not a dumb scenario at all, thanks for the request anon!
You had a habit of brushing your hand against his shoulder as a goodbye. Always so wordless, you express yourself through insignificant, stray actions like that.Â
If Gustavo was a different personâa louder oneâhe perhaps wouldâve not been able to understand why, but he wasnât, and he did understand. He even appreciated the wordlessness of the action, the silence that twisted into warmth, how your hand lingered for just a moment for him to appreciate its warmth.Â
All of it, he liked.Â
But he never showed itânever cared to acknowledge it, just as you didnât care for the glance heâd give you when you turn your back.
He knew you knew to some degreeâbut again, your wordless nature, it shines through you there too, doesnât it?Â
However, today was different.Â
Unexpectedly, it bothered him. Like a burr weed that's stuck to perfectly ironed clothes.Â
âBye, boss.â You had said softly, something that couldâve been swept away by the wind outside; your voice was pleasant. You never really said âbyeâ audiblyâagain, youâd rest your hand on his shoulder before leavingâand he still expected you to do that, butâŚ
You⌠didnât?Â
You just nodded to him before turning, heading to the exit.Â
Gustavo was quick to actâit was almost instinctual, learned.Â
He rested a hand on your shoulder.Â
You stopped walking.Â
He lifted his hand and turned back to his desk.
But in the corner of his eyes, he saw you glance back, and a wide smile was what swept your lipsâit was small, almost demure in nature, but it was enough to satisfy the craving he had for that quick touch of your palm.
...
StrangeâŚÂ
When did he become so reliant on that goodbye?Â
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Can I request some gus fluff or atleast hurt/comfort?? if you could, maybe do a part 2 to this?
the broken hornet nest
Part one: LINKÂ
Summary: Youâre told to drive Fring back to his house.Â
Word count: 1.3k
Warnings: spoilers for BCS s6 (entirety), very mild canon divergence, yet another mental breakdown(?)Â
Note: anon, I propose to you something even better; a hurt/comfort part 2 of that fic??? jhehehehhehe i think thats a good ideaÂ
It was evening time.
âYou think they killed him..?â Victor muttered to Tyrus, whose face remained contemplativeâthen again, he always looked contemplative and calm. âThereâs no way theyâd believe Hector? Right?âÂ
Tyrus exhaled, almost bored. âWho knows?â He shook his head. âProbably not, though. Hector doesnât have anything. Laloâs buried, and so are the cameras and shit.â
âMm.â Victor seemed unsatisfied with the answer. He opened his mouth but clamped it the moment a car appeared from a distance.Â
Its lights blinked, and it only took you a second longer to realize that wasnât just any car, but Gustavoâs.Â
Suddenly, the silent buzzing of your brain erupted in noise.Â
But, you were conscious of how your body presented itself; masking a face of calm, you waited as the car drew forth into the lot of the chicken house. The same one that his lackeys and he had forced you and Nacho into submission, to join.Â
âYou took what I wanted, and now, your lives are mine and mine alone.â The venom in Gustavoâs voice was unfamiliar but commanding, and it stuck fear into youânot for death, no.Â
But him.Â
He had stared at you for a moment too long, and when you looked into his eyes, an abyss of dark and fire reflected back. There was no kindred brush of humanityâthis was not a man, but a being bundled together by blood-laden promises.Â
Someone called your name.
Your head snapped up, and it was Mike who stood there.Â
Mike was looking at you strangely, but his voice betrayed nothing; âMr. Fring needs you to drive him home. He drank.âÂ
You saw that the car was neatly parked, and in the passenger seat, you could make out the vague silhouette of Gustavo.Â
âVictorâs gonna drive your car back home,â he said.Â
Ah. Thatâs why he and Tyrus were in your car..?
Whyâd you not notice that sooner?Â
âJust go, kid. Heâs waiting.âÂ
You nod.Â
Briskly, you walk past him and pause for only a second to see Victor drive your car off before slipping into the driverâs seat of Gustavoâs car.Â
There was a hesitance that dictated your movements, making them a little jerkier than what you wanted, a little obvious.Â
When you sat, you acknowledged Gustavo with a nod, quick to secure the seatbelt. âHello, sir.â
He looked at you. âHello.âÂ
And, like a nervous schoolgirl, you averted your gaze and set your hands on the steering wheel.Â
You were hyperaware of every move, and you hated it, fuckâyour breathing felt too loud, your face too fucking warm, and your heart?âGod, he could hear it, couldnât he?â
A deep chuckle paused your swirl of thoughts.Â
âI donât bite, you know,â Gustavo said. âNo need to be so nervous.âÂ
You breathe, your knuckles whitening as you clutched the steering wheel and carefully turned it. âIâm sorry.â Guilt pressed against the back of your neck like the blade of a guillotine.
âDonât be. I understand.â Warmth lined his words.Â
âIâm forced to work with the man that killed him, just the way you are.â
Your foot pressed a little harder on the gas than you intended, shooting the car into the road.Â
God, having him this close was madnessâmemories of Nacho, and then of Gustavo, they all slam against each other, hurling you farther and farther down an unclimbable pit.Â
Self-hatred was what it has evolved to; you did well at pretending everything was normal and well back at home. Back where his presence didnât burn you. Back where you could shove away memories of that nightâ
âIâm glad, because I feel the same.â
You nearly choked on the air.Â
A part of you begged to turn away and hole out those sinful thoughts, each slathered in feelings of betrayalâGustavo, Gustavo, Gustavoâ
Nacho, forgive me.
Please, forgive me? Please?Â
But that was merciful. Forgiveness, for you? Youâre too far gone. Atonement came in blood, but you didnât have the fucking heart.
âSomethingâs tearing you apart, isnât it?âÂ
Again, your brain froze at the sound of his voice, pushing everything to a halt.Â
But guilt lingered.Â
âIâŚâ Should you be honest? Or lie? Was there a ârightâ to this? What do you even do?
âJust talk.â His words were gentle. âSay anything.âÂ
Your breath shakily. âCould we, maybe, park the car somewhere? I canâtâI mightââ
âYes. Just pull over here.âÂ
âHereâ being the open desert field with nothing in sight.Â
You didnât care though. You were more than eager to pull over to buy timeâtime for what, you werenât sure at all.Â
But when you stumbled out of the car, you shut the door and lean against it for a second. Your body was actively working against you, sucking out all energy you possessed and leaving you heaving with unbreakable thoughtsâand those thoughts compounding to hit your skull. It almost made you feverish, and the answer to why was thereâ
âjust as that answer is the same antidote to your slow, proverbial destruction.Â
The crunch of gravel makes your head turn, and you saw that Gustavo was approaching your side of the car.Â
He, however, didnât say anything, nor seemed irritated at your state; he quietly slid by your side, standing still and staring at the shadowed landscape.Â
He only said one word: âTalk.âÂ
You hated how easy it was to follow that commandâand you loathed the underlying flutter of comfort that shot through you, a warmth that washed the guilt away like water over a wound.Â
âI⌠you said that you still worked with the same people that killed your brother.âÂ
He turned his head to you and nodded.Â
It was hard to hold his gaze, but you did so.Â
âThen, do you feel guilty? Because youâre working with them?âÂ
âNo,â he smiled. âBecause I plan to toss them away like stones.âÂ
âOh.âÂ
You stare at the ground. When you spoke, your voice was smallâalmost pathetic. âI donât think Iâll be able to function much longer. Iâfuck, itâs hard to put into words, butâŚâ
The words were scary, but you said them anyway. âBut I feel as though heâll never forgive me. As if, the longer I, uh, humor whatâs between us, heâll hate me more and more.â
The words became harder, and for a moment, you couldnât help but freeze. Speaking so openlyâit felt wrong. Especially to Gustavo Fring, of all people.Â
But, strangely, it felt right at the same time. As if he were the only person in the world who could properly understandâor, perhaps, the only person you couldâŚ
Trust?Â
âSir?âÂ
âJust call me GustavoââÂ
âCould you tell me something? Please?âÂ
Now you looked at him, and what you saw was a dilemma.Â
Betrayal, or atonement.
âIf I trusted you, what would you do?â You fully turned to him. You decide. âIf I gave you my complete and undying faith, what would happen?â Would I come to regret it? Or regret not doing so sooner?Â
Gustavo regarded you with a strange expression, one you couldnât decipher at all.Â
But you just stood there, watching his face, watching emotion flash like a film reelâeach emotion as unreadable as the next.Â
And then, he extended an open hand, palm upward.Â
âI would cherish that trust,â he said quietly. âAs though it were my own soul.âÂ
In his eyes, at that moment, you knew what he said was no lie. It was truth, illuminated in the moonâs gentle light that cradled Gustavoâs face.Â
You set your hand on his. Then, with your other hand, you hesitantly set it on the back of his. You glance at him.Â
He smiled warmly, eyes crinkling at the corners.Â
âYouâre mine,â you whispered.Â
His smile grew. âI always was.âÂ
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