juanarc-thethird - Tumblr blog

[juanarc-thethird]

[juanarc-thethird]

Is a Nas-Cart

At a Gas station

Jaune: $6 on pump two, please.

Cashier: *Looks outside and then back to Jaune* Sir, that's a shopping cart.

Jaune: I don't see what the make and model of my vehicle has anything to do with the $6 of cold hard cash I just laid on the counter.

Cashier: My apologies sir. Go nuts.

Jaune gets out and begins to soak the shopping cart with gasoline.

????: *Angry* There you are, you piece of shit!

Jaune: *Looks behind him*

????: I've been looking for you!

Jaune: Who, me?

He says while continuing to douse the shopping cart with gasoline.

Kmart Manager: No, the other dumb fuck pouring gasoline into a shopping cart. I'm the general manager at the Kmart down the street. We've been looking for the bastard who keeps taking carts, and dousing them in gasoline before returning them on the fucking cart corral!!

Jaune: Sir, this ain't no ordinary shopping cart. This is a Nas-Cart.

Kmart Manager: I'm going to beat you to death you little-

*Car noises* Jaune climbs into the shopping cart and drives to the horizon.

Kmart Manager: My mistake, you have a good rest of your evening.

[juanarc-thethird]

Cinder: *She knocks Jaune's sword out of his hand*

Cinder: Ha! I won!

Jaune: *Pulls out a 9mm*

Cinder: *Concern* OH SHIT!!

[juanarc-thethird]

What software to you use for recolor?

I use Pixelmator Pro, it's only for Mac. But it's cheaper than paying for photoshop. It costs $40 and is only one payment. Not a subscription like Adobe does with its products.

Just for the record, I bought this program because my job often involves making edits (I'm a photographer/social media manager). That's why I bought this one, but I know you can find cheaper or free programs that can also do the job.

I do suggest that you make your research on what they can do before you decided on one. There are some programs that cannot do certain things.

[juanarc-thethird]

[juanarc-thethird]

It could have been worse.

At the Living room

Jaune: Blake, did you know that I used to date Eve?

Blake: Wait, Eve Taurus? Adam's sister, my crazy ex.

Jaune: Yep

Blake: Wow, what a small world. What was it like going out with her? I assume it was just like my experience.

Jaune: Not quite, she was… Um… less intense compared to Adam.

Blake: What did she do?

Jaune: Well...

Flash back

Late at night

Jaune: *Lying in his bed texting on the phone*

Eve (Text): I wanna see you🥺

Jaune: Me too. I wish you were here with me.

Eve: *Coming out of the closet the Jaune* Really?!

Jaune: *Shocked* WHAT THE FUCK!!!

Flash back ends

Jaune: She found it difficult to understand boundaries.

Blake: Look on the bright side, at least she didn't try to kill you after you two broke up.

Jaune: You're right.

Meanwhile, a girl, too in love to understand reason, was hiding on the roof above them.

Eve: Soon my love. Soon we will be together again… but this time it will be forever~💕

[juanarc-thethird]

[juanarc-thethird]

Zen Jaune

Jaune: *Meditating in the distance on the cliff looking at the Emerald Forest*

Nora and Yang are looking at him from afar.

Yang: What's up with Jaune?

Nora: Remember the time you, me ,and the other girls almost broke Jaune's sanity with your double meaning jokes?

Yang: Yeah

Nora: Well, this is his prize. Infinite enlightenment.

Jaune: *Shining bright*

Yang: *Pfft* No way he got "infinite enlightenment".

Nora: If you don't believe it, you can try making bad.

Yang: How?

Nora: I don't know. Say or do something that can make him angry?

Yang: Like?

Nora: If I knew, I would have done it already.

Yang: True. Ok lets try something... light.

Yang walks up to Jaune and says.

Yang: Hey Jaune, Cardin is talking shit about you again. He says you're still a loser! Let's go beat him up!

Jaune: No thank you.

Yang: Come on! He said you're fight like a girl! He deserves it!

Jaune: "Everything we hear is an opinion, not a fact." "Everything we see is perspective, not the truth." "Our understanding of situations is filtered through our prejudices."

Yang:...

Yang turns around and walks past Nora.

Nora: Wait. *She takes Yang's arm* What did he tell you?

Yang: *Stunned* He… He is a real man.

[juanarc-thethird]

Mana is not the only thing I have.

The sorcerer Jaune faces the demon Cinder in an epic battle. The fight was even until the worst happened to Jaune.

Jaune: *Tries to cast a spell but only a spark comes out* Oh no

Cinder: *Mocking him* What happened? Did you run out of mana? *Chuckles*

Jaune: I didn't want it to come to this. *He begins to take off his thick sorcerer's robe*

Cinder: Hahaha! Are you so desperate to live that you are going to try to seduce me? Hahaha! That's...

Jaune finishes removing his robe, showing his incredible, very well built, I mean VERY well built body.

Cinder: *Astonished* ...hilarious?

Jaune: *sad* I am very sorry for this. I assure you I'll do it quickly.

Cinder: *Nervous* H-Hold on, what are you going to do to me?

Jaune: *Gets closer* I'm really sorry.

Cinder: H-Hey! S-Stay away from me! STAY AWAY!

Moments later:

Nora (Dwarf): Jaune, we're here! Are you still alive?!- Oh!

Ren (Elf): *Show up behind her* What happen, Nora? Is Jaune- Oh!

Pyrrha (Barbarian): *follows* Guys, what happen?!- Oh my~

In front of them was Jaune holding Cinder in a wrestling hold trying to cut off her airflow.

Jaune: *crying* I'm sorry

Cinder: *About to pass out* L-Let me g-go, y-you b-b-brute...

Pyrrha: Aw, he remembers the hold I taught him~💕

Nora: How much was the reward if we brought her back alive?

Ren: 10,000 extra gold pieces.

Nora: Jaune! Don't kill her! We need her alive!!!

[juanarc-thethird]

The art of seduction.

Jaune: Yang, look.

Yang: Hm?

Jaune: *he takes out a hose* Hose...

Yang: ?

Jaune: *He puts a small mariachi hat on the hose* José :D

Yang:...

Jaune: *Nervous* You... You didn't like it?

Yang: I'm going to fuck you so hard.

[juanarc-thethird]

Nora's Motivation of the day Part 8

Nora: You are not single because you are ugly. You are single because you are so attractive that people don't ask you out for fear of being rejected.

Jaune: Yeah, sureee~ *He says sarcastically*

Meanwhile:

Coco: *Talking to herself in the mirror* Ok Coco! Today is the day you will ask Jaune on a date. No more excuses. So go out there and get that hot piece of ass!

Coco: *She walks away from the mirror*

Coco: *Stops*

Coco: *She comes back to the mirror*

Coco: But what if he rejects me? I won't be able to handle that! My life would be over! Fuuuuuuck, why is he so damn attractive?!

[juanarc-thethird]

Bonus: 2 weeks later.

Ozpin: *Checking his email and drinking coffe*

Dr. Arc (email):

Good morning Prof. Ozpin.

I hope this email finds you before I do.

Ozpin: *Spits out his coffee in panic!*

Ozpin: Glynda, cancel all my appointments today. I'm not feeling very well, I think I'll take the day off.

Dr. Arc #3

Jaune: *To de camera* A few days ago it was my birthday and my grandmother gave me one of her delicious pies, just for me. I brought my last piece here to eat with my lunch. But to make sure no one took it, I put it all the way to the back in the refrigerator and with several notes saying "Do not touch" and "Property of Dr. Arc."

---------

Jaune is placing his pie all the way in the back of the fridge and then starts putting everything else back inside.

---------

Jaune: There's no way anyone would eat it.

---------

Lunch time

Ren: Hey Jaune, today we're all going to eat outside in the garden. The weather is good today.

Jaune: Ok, I'll just finish some paperwork and catch up to you guys.

Ren: Sounds good. *leaves*

The camera shows how Jaune continues working but in the distance, through one of the clinic windows, you can see Ozpin checking the staff refrigerator.

---------

The scene changed with Jaune filing the papers in his file cabinet.

Jaune: Well, I'm done. Now it's time to eat my pie~

The camera follows him to the refrigerator. He starts taking things out, and when he gets to the end he freezes in place.

---------

Ozpin's Office

The camera shows Ozpin at his desk working on some papers.

Ozpin: *Drinking Coffe*

*Ting!*

Suddenly the camera changes direction to the elevator doors and Glynda appears.

Glynda: Ozpin, we have a problem.

---------

Staff room

The camera shows everyone scared as Jaune holds Yang hostage using a syringe.

Jaune: Ok motherfuckers! Who the hell ate my pie?!! Tell me now, or the girl gets it!

Yang: *Blushing* Oh god~💕 You are so strong~💕

Weiss: *Worry* Jaune, please calm down. We can talk about this in a civilized manner, let Yang go..

Yang: *Angry* Hey, don't ruin this to me. Don't listen to her, Jaune. Don't even think about letting me go from your strong arms~💕

Weiss: Yang, you're not helping!

Yang: You're jealous because he didn't choose you as a hostage.

Weiss: *Angry blushing* I'm not!!

Ozpin: What's going on here?!

The camera changes to Ozpin, with Glynda behind him. Everyone turns to see him.

Ozpin: Dr. Arc, what do you think you are doing? Let Professor Xiao Long go.

Jaune: No! Someone ate my pie and they don't tell me who it was. And I won't let her go until they tell me who it was.

Yang: Yes please~💕

Ozpin: Wait, are you perhaps talking about a lemon pie with chocolate chips?

Jaune: Yes, how do you know? It was wrapped in aluminum

Ozpin: Oh, I think I'm to blame in all this.

Jaune: Huh?

Ozpin: I'm very sorry Dr. Arc, but it seems that I ate your pie by mistake.

Jaune: But it had my name!

Ozpin: And I'm sorry, I didn't think it was that important to you.

Jaune: *Shock* You ate it all?

Ozpin: Not completely, it was too sweet for me. I threw the rest in the trash.

Jaune: *Surprise* You threw it in the trash?!

Ozpin: I hope you can forgive me.

Jaune: *Let Yang go* You know what, don't worry about it. Mistakes happen all the time, right.

Ozpin: Oh I'm glad to hear that. Well, with this resolved. Let's all go back to work, okay?

Ozpin turns around if he leaves, with Glynda following behind him. The camera then focuses on Jaune, who doesn't look away from Ozpin without blinking. It's kind of intimidating.

---------

Ozpin's office

Ozpin is looking out of his window at the scenery of the school and city. He holds up his cup of coffee and takes a sip.

*ting!*

Ozpin: hm?

The camera shows the elevator door to his office open with Jaune stepping out of it.

Ozpin: Dr. Arc, I was not expecting your visit. How can I help you??

Jaune: I came to give you my two weeks' notice.

He puts his letter on his desk and leaves. Ozpin takes the letter and begins to open it without looking away from Jaune.

Ozpin: Is it because I ate your pie? Please Dr. Arc, it was just an…

At that moment he reads the letter and it says:

"I will attack in two weeks."

Ozpin: ..Accident

He looks back at Jaune, and as the elevator doors close he can see an evil smile spread across his face. Then Jaune moves his lips without making any noise saying "two weeks." Ozpin starts to break out in a cold sweat.

Ozpin: I think I made a huge mistake.

[juanarc-thethird]

You have no idea…

Jaune: *Browsing the internet*

*A pop-up ad appears*

Ad: "Lonely milf in your area. Laura: Are you alone?~💕"

Jaune:...

Jaune: *Looks at the window*

Jaune: *A tear emerges and falls down his cheek*

Jaune: (You have no idea, Laura)

[juanarc-thethird]

We're just playing.

Adrian: *Swinging a stick at Jaune* Hiii-ya!! 😆

Jaune: Huh, trying to cast spells on me? That's cute.*Pick up a stick from the ground* AVADA KEDAVRA!!

Adrian: 😨!!

[juanarc-thethird]

Nothing happened during the eclipse.

At the living room

Yang: *Disappointed* Nothing happened during the eclipse.

Weiss: Of course nothing was going to happen. Did you seriously believe those absurd theories on the internet?

Yang: No, but what if?

Weiss: Ugh, they're never going to happen. Right, Jaune?”

Jaune: *Drinking tea on the couch* Right

Weiss: See, even Jaune agree.

Yang: Still...

The two girls leave, leaving Jaune alone.

Jaune: (Sorry Yang, but those theories will never going to happen…)

Jaune takes out a bloody and very old ceremonial sword that he had hidden under the couch, and takes it to his room.

Jaune: (..Not while I'm still here.)

There is a reason why the Arc family has the double moon as their symbol.

[juanarc-thethird]

At the Market

Random Dad: Look son, the heroes of Atlas.

Son: Wow!

Ruby: How many avocados did Ren say we should get?

Jaune: Two, and if there are eggs, a dozen.

Ruby: They do have eggs. So... 12 avocados?

Jaune: That's what he said.

Random Dad/Son: 😐😐

remember her message ♥

idk if anyone has done this yet, but i wanted to give piecing the mural together from the credits a shot, so. here. first time trying this, think it turned out okay lmao

[juanarc-thethird]

In my country we have a saying. "Más sabe el diablo por viejo que por diablo" (The devil knows more for being old than for being a devil), it means that the experience acquired over time is more valuable than cunning or innate ability.

Bullet Train (2022)