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juulessturn · 22 days ago

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「 "off record" 」 chris sturniolo

. . . . . . . . . 「 9.2k words . 」

content : angst . fluff . smut if u read far enough . brief mentions of drinking . intentional lowercase .

a/n : " this is a lot longer than it was supposed to be and some of the paragraphs are deadass just awkward. reminder that i write over the course of a few days, weeks, or even months, i do all of my writing late at night, and sometimes high. it's absolutely a wild ride but i hope u enjoy regardless " ✴

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our group was in a pretty chaotic state, to say the least. there were a lot of us for starters, mostly content creators like tara, jake, johnnie, larray, quen, the triplets, along with a bunch of smaller creators, myself being one of them. everyone was joking around, a little tipsy, and the noise level was through the roof. it was technically an after-party, but i felt a bit less on edge since my boyfriend knew almost everyone there.

i was drinking a white claw, standing next to chris as he spoke to quen and his brothers, nodding along even though i wasn’t really following the conversation. the music was playing low in the background– some playlist that blended early 2010s pop with newer tiktok hits, and people were scattered around the room in little pockets, laughing, filming something, or just talking on the couch.

larray shouted something across the room that made half of us burst out laughing, and someone spilled a drink in the process. i glanced at the mess and then back at chris, who just shook his head and smiled like none of this was surprising.

tara came up to our sub-group, vlogging camera out, and clearly more drunk than most people there. the second i saw the red recording light, i stepped away from chris, casually, perfectly used to it. we’d dealt with dating rumors before– any girl around the triplets got them, but mine were different. mine were true.

chris just wasn’t ready to make it public yet.

so when tara pointed the camera at us, shouting something i didn’t acknowledge, i slipped on a smile, the kind that looked easy and unbothered. chris glanced at me for half a second. just enough to say he noticed, that we were still in sync.

it was strange, pretending not to love someone standing right next to you, but again, it wasn’t new. i was used to being in public with him and having to stand at a ‘safe distance.’

tara drifted off, camera still rolling, shouting something as she disappeared into the noise. the moment passed like they always did– quick, messy, easy to miss if you weren’t paying attention.

chris didn’t say anything right away. he just took a sip of his drink, eyes scanning the room like he was keeping track of the scene. i knew him well enough to recognize that look– half on guard, half somewhere else.

after a beat, he leaned in a little. “sorry,” he said quietly, not really looking at me.

“it’s fine,” i murmured.

“really, i am.” he reiterated, as quen pulled us back into the conversation. pulling our attention with her. whatever was between me and chris dissolved into the noise.

i laughed when i was supposed to, nodded along, let the conversation carry me. chris was still next to me, closer but not touching. i decided that i needed to get over myself and threw in a joke here and there, easing back into my own skin.

chris didn’t look at me, not directly, but every so often, i felt it. this flicker of attention, like he was checking to make sure i was okay without apologizing again. he knew me, and at this point, he knew i didn’t like being a secret.

quen was mid-story about a brand trip when she turned suddenly to me. “wait, weren’t you there for that?”

i blinked. “which trip?”

“mexico, where the hotel lost all our reservations.”

i let out a short laugh, the kind that still carried traces of exhaustion. “yeah. i was definitely there.”

quen gasped, eyes wide with secondhand horror.

“uh-huh” i nodded at her horror, smiling. “landed in cancún at like ten p.m, got to the front desk, and they were like, ‘you don’t exist.’” i shook my head. “i think someone cried.” i squinted.

“i know someone cried,” she said, grinning.

everyone around us laughed— nick, matt, jake, a woman who i didn’t catch the name of, and chris. i felt him glance at me again. subtle. like he was just checking. i didn’t look back.

quen started describing the rest of the trip, some dinner where the seafood was undercooked and one of the managers got way too drunk and fell into the hotel fountain. someone handed out shots mid-story, and we all clinked plastic cups without knowing exactly what we were toasting to.

someone turned the music up. not enough to make it a dance floor, but enough to blur the edges of every conversation. people started drifting toward the couch or the kitchen or toward whoevers camera was filming at that moment. another camera filming meant me and chris would have to keep our distance. it brought my mood down again.

i ended up in the kitchen not long after, trying to cool down and get water, letting the cold cup press into my hands as an excuse to stay still. the overhead light was buzzing slightly, and the hum of the party felt distant from here, even though it was only a few steps away.

chris found me like he always did. quietly, without announcement.

he leaned beside me against the counter, not saying anything for a moment. the silence between us didn’t feel heavy, exactly, just full.

“you handled that well,” he said eventually, voice low, just for me.

i didn’t look at him. “handled what?”

he hesitated. “tara. the camera. everything.”

i shrugged. “it’s not the first time.”

he exhaled softly, like that answer hurt more than he wanted it to.

he looked tired. not the party kind of tired– the quiet kind. the emotional kind.

“i hate that you have to,” he said, almost like a question, and his voice was honest in a way it rarely got to be in public.

i nodded slowly. “me too.” i chuckled.

someone laughed loudly in the other room– quen again, probably– and the sound bounced off the kitchen tile like a reminder that we weren’t alone, that we never really were.

“one day,” he said softly.

i didn’t say anything. not because i didn’t believe him, but because i wasn’t sure that my belief changed anything right now.

he looked like he wanted to say more, like he was turning something over in his head. i watched him for a moment.

but then someone called his name, their voice echoing down the hallway. chris looked toward the sound, then back at me. his mouth opened like he might stay. explain. say something real.

but he didn’t.

instead, he reached out, just barely brushing his hand against mine. the touch was quick, almost nothing, but it made something in me ache anyway.

“i’ll be right back,” he said.

i stayed in the kitchen longer than i needed to. the party buzzed behind me. music, shouting, bursts of laughter. someone was crying in the hallway– or maybe laughing. it was hard to tell.

people came in and out. looking for soda, a place to breathe, somewhere their phone could hear them.

i checked the doorway once, or twice, or more. but i knew chris wasn’t coming back. he didn’t go to many parties but when he did, he kept busy. people loved him.

eventually, i pushed off the counter and slipped back into the party like i hadn’t been waiting for anything, or anyone.

quen was dancing now, barefoot and holding her heels in one hand. tara was filming again, telling her camera someone’s relationship drama. someone had opened a new bag of chips and spilled half of it on the carpet.

it was all still happening, with or without me. i needed to suck it up.

i made my way to the edge of the couch where johnnie and matt were having a debate about something stupid. i smiled at them as i sat down and joined their conversation halfway through.

chris was across the room now, sitting on the arm of a chair with a drink in his hand, head tilted toward whoever he was talking to. he looked like he was listening. like he was fine. like none of this was difficult at all. the thought gave me a pit in my stomach.

the feeling only grew when a woman came up to him and sat on the arm of his chair, speaking to him like they were already mid-conversation. she laughed at something he said– or maybe nothing at all, and leaned into him, her hand brushing his arm like she didn’t even think about it.

i saw it happen from across the room. i saw the way chris shifted, just slightly. his shoulders tensed for half a second, his smile didn’t quite reach his eyes. he didn’t lean into her. but he didn’t move away either.

he didn’t stop it.

i looked down at my phone, even though my screen was black. tried to focus on the buzz of the room, on johnnie’s voice, on the couch cushion under my legs– anything but him.

he could’ve said something. even just stood up, made an excuse. but he stayed there, nodding along, drink still in hand like everything was fine.

matt asked me a question and i answered without thinking. my voice came out calm, maybe even bored. i was good at that now, looking unbothered while my stomach turned. obviously, matt knew about chris and i, and he glanced over to where i was looking and furrowed his brows. when i made eye contact with him he gave me a pity smile.

chris looked over, just once. it wasn’t long, but it was enough. he knew i’d seen it. he knew i was watching.

for a second, i was scared he’d let it go. just keep sitting there like nothing was wrong, but then he shifted.

he said something to the woman, soft and quick, and stood up before she could respond. his drink still in hand, eyes scanning the room until they landed on me. and this time, he didn’t look away.

he walked over like it was nothing, and when he sat down next to me he didn’t say anything. just rested his arm along the back of the couch, fingers brushing my shoulder, like a quiet answer.

i didn’t look at him. but i leaned into the touch. just slightly.

just enough.

his hand found mine, slow and careful, like he was still testing the weight of it all. like he wasn’t sure how much i’d let him take.

i let our fingers link. didn’t look, didn’t squeeze. just let it happen.

when the song ended, quen stumbled toward us and flopped dramatically onto the couch, landing half on the cushion, half on my knee. i giggled.

“jesus,” she sighed, dropping her heels on the floor. “i’m done, y’all.”

i laughed, then i saw it. her eyes flicking down, just briefly, to where mine and chris’s hands were linked between us. subtle. fast. but not missed.

she didn’t say anything. just raised one eyebrow as she leaned her head back against the couch, letting it all settle in.

it felt good. it felt normal. until it didn’t. larray sat on the edge of the couch next to quen, and started filming a tiktok. i felt chris shift before anything else.

his fingers slipped out of mine like it was automatic. muscle memory. he reached for his drink instead, eyes flicking to the phone before casually taking a sip, suddenly preoccupied.

i didn’t move or flinch, i just pressed my lips together, slow and tight. like the pressure could stop something in me from spilling out.

we weren’t even really in frame. maybe the corner of my shoulder. maybe the side of his knee. it didn’t matter.

he let go anyway.

i stared straight ahead, face smooth, calm. it had been seconds, not even long enough for anyone else to notice, but the absence of his hand burned louder than the music.

i knew this version of him. the one who knew how to hold my hand like it meant something when no one was looking, but always dropped it the second he felt any attention on him. the version of him that would tell me he loved me a thousand times as long as he knew no one could hear.

he was the version of himself that didn’t owe me anything. not in front of other people. not when it could be traced back, screen-recorded, speculated on. he was warm when we were hidden, he loved me when we were alone, but he was always careful not to leave his fingerprints behind.

he could lean into me in a quiet room, kiss me and have me feel it with every bone in my body, and then walk five feet ahead of me in public like we’d never touched.

and i let him. every time. because i loved the version of him that existed after the cameras stopped rolling. because that version looked at me like i was his.

still, it didn’t hurt less. it just felt more familiar.

at this point, it was on me. i kept choosing the version of him that only existed behind closed doors, behind quiet walls. the one who whispered to stay a little longer when the party was over, who kissed the inside of my wrist like it was something sacred. the one who told me he wasn’t ready to tell people, but he’d already decided i was home.

i told myself that version was the real chris. the one that mattered. the careful distance in public didn’t mean anything. it was all temporary.

but nights like this –when his hand slipped from mine as soon as a phone came out, they chipped away at me. not all at once, but slowly, each time added up.

“you’re quiet,” he said, voice low enough that only i could hear. i swallowed the knot tightening in my chest and finally turned to him.

“yeah,” i said. he glanced at me, eyes flickering with something i couldn’t quite place. maybe guilt, maybe exhaustion.

i took a deep breath, the noise and chaos swirling around us suddenly felt too much. my voice came out quieter than i expected.

“can we talk outside?”

he blinked, caught off guard for a moment, then nodded slowly.

we stood, slipping through the crowd, the weight of the room fading behind us with every step. the air outside hit my skin. cool and sharp, like a reset.

“i’m tired of feeling like a secret.” i said bluntly when we stepped outside. my voice was steadier than i felt, i could feel my hands shaking. “we’ve been together for like– a year now?” i said it like a question. “but every time someone pulls out a phone or points a camera in our direction, you act like i’m invisible.”

he stayed quiet, but i kept going, like if i stopped, i’d never say it again.

my chest felt tight, breath catching somewhere behind the words. “you- you act like i’m someone you can just let go of without a second thought. and i’ve taken it and i’ve let it happen and i’ve done the same to you but i’m so fucking done with it. it hurts chris.” my voice cracked.

i crossed my arms. he opened his mouth, then closed it again. ran a hand over his jaw, thinking, and it only made the silence worse.

finally, he said, voice low, “i didn’t think it would hurt you like that in the beginning.”

“it didn’t hurt in the beginning.” i verified.

"i knew it wasn’t perfect, but i thought we had an understanding.” he didn’t acknowledge what i said.

“we did,” i said quietly. “i just don’t think it’s working anymore.”

his voice was quiet now, steadier than before. “baby, i’ve seen what happens. the hate. the comments. the way people pick apart everything. the last few girls people thought i was dating, none of them were even real relationships, they got dragged through hell.” he leaned into me as he spoke. “i’m talking full-on hate campaigns. death threats. people digging through their lives.”

“i know,” i said, and i did. i’d seen it happen too. girls whose names were barely linked to his became targets overnight. profiles flooded with snark and cruel edits. people made entire reddit threads dedicated to speculating if they were good enough. most of the time, the answer was no.

“it’s not just about me,” he said, his voice a little more urgent now. “it’s about you too. i don’t want you to go through that.”

“but i already am,” i said, and my voice came out smaller than i wanted. “the rumors alone have people hating me, and i don’t care if they continue to if it means we can be seen in public together.”

he looked at me for a long time after that. like he didn’t know what to say, like he was trying to piece together an answer that wouldn’t make it worse.

“i didn’t want you to feel like this,” he said finally, his voice barely above the wind. “i thought– i thought if we could just wait it out a little longer, until the timing felt right, until people calmed down..”

he trailed off. we both knew they never calmed down.

i sighed and wrapped my arms tighter around myself, the night air making me shiver in my short black dress. i didn’t respond right away.

chris noticed my shivering. he pulled his hoodie over his head without a word and handed it to me, holding it out like a peace offering. the only times he did that was when it was late at night and we were on the beach with no one there. it was too risky otherwise, so i hesitated.

i took it anyway, tugged it over my head, the sleeves still warm from him. it smelled like his cologne and something vaguely like laundry detergent, and i hated how comforting it was.

he gave me a moment. then, “can we.. go back in?”

i swallowed and glanced at the house behind us. the glowing windows, the echo of music, bursts of laughter spilling out now and then. i thought about how drained i felt, but also about how warm it had been in there. how easy it was to get swept up in the noise. how sometimes pretending everything was fine helped it feel that way, just for a little while.

i nodded. “okay.”

he didn’t smile exactly, but his whole posture softened. like tension he’d been carrying loosened the second i agreed.

“wait,” i paused. “do i look like i was crying?” i ask, dabbing my face with my hands.

“you look beautiful,” he said simply, and came closer.

i chuckled, and he leaned to kiss me. it was quick, but it felt right.

we slipped into the living room. i ended up sitting on the floor by the couch, my legs tucked under me, the hoodie sleeves hanging a bit past my hands. chris sank down next to me a beat later, and our knees touched, steady and casual.

someone passed a bowl of popcorn. larray shrieked about something quen said. music played from a speaker that someone had balanced dangerously on top of a stack of chairs. the room was messy and loud and strangely comforting.

chris leaned in every so often, saying something under his breath– jokes, quiet comments, a random memory. nothing deep, nothing heavy. just enough to remind me he was there. that we were okay. or trying to be.

i let my head fall lightly against his shoulder. just for a second. just to feel him there. he didn’t move. didn’t freeze. didn’t pull away. he just shifted slightly so it was easier to stay like that.

the couch behind us creaked as someone shifted, and larray shouted something about popcorn getting in his shoe. we both looked up, and just like that, the moment passed— swept back into the noise and movement of the night.

but even after i sat up, chris didn’t move away. his knee stayed against mine. his hand drifted just slightly over mine, not fully holding it, but close.

i turned to see nick standing a few feet away, a red solo cup in one hand and his brows raised, not in judgment, just surprise. the way he looked at us wasn’t loud or dramatic. more like he’d stumbled across something unexpected and wasn’t quite sure how to process it.

“hi,” i said, soft but steady.

“hi,” he greeted back. “you okay?”

i nodded. “yeah.”

he held my gaze for a second longer, like he was checking that i meant it. then he relaxed a bit and dropped into the space next to us on the floor, legs stretching out in front of him as he leaned back on his hands.

“this group,” nick muttered with a little shake of his head. “they’re all so loud tonight.”

“are you not part of that group?” chris asked, smiling.

“yeah, but i’m the best one,” nick said.

he glanced over at me again. “i’m glad you’re still here, you’re the only other normal person.” he said.

chris made a face. i giggled.

we didn’t make a big deal of it. no one around us even seemed to notice what had shifted between me and chris. but nick had. and for some reason, that made it feel more real.

i kept my gaze on the room, trying not to lean too hard into the moment, but i was shocked when chris started rubbing my thigh. it wasn’t sexual, wasn’t showy, just quiet and steady. familiar.

someone turned the lights down a little, not dramatically, just enough to make everything softer around the edges. larray was singing into a remote control. quen was now fully horizontal across the loveseat, legs dangling off one side, scrolling through her camera roll and narrating every photo she found. there was laughter, clinking plastic cups, the soft sound of a tiktok audio starting and stopping somewhere in the room.

and still, his hand stayed on my leg.

i finally turned, just slightly, and looked at him.

he met my eyes right away.

“what?” he asked softly.

i shrugged. “nothing.”

his thumb brushed slowly just above my knee. “you sure?”

“yeah,” i said, voice low. “just surprised.”

“by what?”

“this,” i said, nodding toward his hand.

he didn’t pull away. didn’t even hesitate. just looked at me with that steady, unreadable expression he got when he was letting something settle in his chest before saying it out loud.

then, quietly, he said, “i kinda wanna stop hiding.”

“seriously?”

“dead serious.”

i swallowed around something in my throat and gave the smallest smile. “okay.”

“okay,” he echoed, grinning.

for a few minutes, we stayed like that. just the sound of the room around us and the feeling of his hand on my leg. i felt almost feverish, like he was everywhere, like the whole world was narrowing down to the space we shared.

the rest of the hour slipped by in the way only party time does– fast, blurry around the edges, warm in a way that made it easy to forget anything hard had happened.

chris didn’t move his hand, but he didn’t push any further either. just kept it there, a steady weight on my leg, like a reminder. like he was still holding onto what he’d said.

we sat there for a while. i ended up talking to nick and johnnie about old vines we loved, chris chimed in every now and then, laughing when i pulled up a video and started quoting it word for word.

tara was lying on the floor with her feet up on the wall, talking to someone and laughing at everything. an old kesha song came on and the room lost its mind for a full three minutes.

i was surprised how normal it all felt. how easy it was to fall back into the noise. maybe it was the hoodie. or maybe it was just that chris hadn’t pulled away again. not once.

eventually, chris nudged me gently, his voice low near my ear. “you ready to go?”

i nodded. “yeah. i’m crashing.”

he stood up and offered me a hand, and i took it without thinking. his fingers curled around mine like they’d always been there, and to be fair, they kind of had, but it felt so odd to be publicly holding his hand.

“let’s find my brothers,” he said as we weaved through the soft chaos of the living room. the group had thinned out, some people curled up on furniture, others deep in late-night conversations or filming sleepy tiktoks.

we passed quen, still horizontal on the loveseat, talking to larray in half-coherent sentences. she raised a lazy hand when she saw us. “bye, bye..”

i smiled. “night, quen.”

we headed down the hall toward one of the back rooms. music was still playing, but quieter now. more background than anything. when we opened the door, we found nick sitting on the floor, deep in conversation with a guy i didn’t recognize, dark hair, hoodie sleeves pushed up. they were sitting close, their knees nearly touching.

chris raised an eyebrow. “you guys ready?.”

nick looked up, caught somewhere between flustered and annoyed. “now?”

“yes,” matt said, suddenly appearing behind us, already holding his keys like he’d been waiting.

nick rolled his eyes but didn’t argue. “give me a sec.” he turned to the guy, said something soft that i couldn’t catch, they exchanged numbers, and hugged goodbye quickly before nick got to his feet.

as we walked back through the house, i glanced over and saw the guy still watching nick leave, a little smile on his face. something about it made me grin.

outside, the air had cooled down. the streets were quiet, lit by the soft yellow haze of streetlights. the car was parked a little ways down, and we walked in comfortable silence, the four of us spreading out along the sidewalk.

“that guy was cute,” i said softly to nick.

“you think?” he asked, trying to sound casual.

“yeah,” i said, bumping his shoulder. “you gonna text him?”

“already did.”

i giggled. “of course.”

when we reached the car, matt got into the driver’s seat, nick slid into the passenger seat and immediately started messing with the aux.

“don’t play anything sad,” chris called out as he opened the back door. nick frowned

i climbed in beside chris, the door shutting with a dull thud behind me. the car smelled faintly like sunscreen and spearmint gum. i tucked my legs up a little on the seat, and chris settled in the seat next to me.

“can we get food?” nick asked matt. he groaned.

“yes,” i immediately jumped up.

“thank you,” nick replied, dramatically placing a hand over his heart.

“oh my god, not both of you.” matt rubbed his eyes.

“actually,” chris added. “ i’m hungry too.”

matt sighed, shaking his head, but chris was already pulling up directions to the nearest drive-thru.

“you’re all the worst,” matt muttered, even as he changed lanes.

nick turned back toward the front, triumphant.

the car eased away from the curb, and the party faded behind us, just noise and light in the rearview. i leaned my head against the window for a second, the cold glass grounding me, until i felt chris’s fingers lightly brush against mine.

i looked down, then at him.

he didn’t say anything. just lifted his hand slowly and linked his pinky with mine. not a full hold, not a statement. just something small.

i let it stay there. let it mean whatever it meant.

matt turned up the volume just as a soft, acoustic song filled the car.

the city blurred outside, and for a few minutes, no one said anything. just the music, and the rhythm of the road, and the steady feel of chris beside me.

when we pulled into the drive-thru line, the car went quiet again for a minute. the low rumble of the engine, the familiar hum of the drive-thru speaker, comforting in a way only late-night food runs could be. the kind that always felt like a reset button after a loud party or too many feelings.

when it was finally our turn, nick did the ordering, leaning forward with the kind of confidence that meant he was in a very good mood.

once we got to the window, chris handed over his card before anyone else could even reach for their wallets. i gave him a look, but he just shrugged.

“i’m trying to be nice,” he said. “let me be nice.”

nick snorted. “this is him making up for the months of emotional damage.”

“shut up,” chris muttered, but he was smiling.

we took the bags and drinks, the warm scent of fries filling the car instantly. nick immediately sorted through the bags and handed ours back.

i tossed a fry at him, and he caught it in his mouth, immediately celebrating like he’d won the lottery.

“i’m so good,” he said through a mouthful. “matt, did you see that?”

“i’m ignoring all of you,” matt said flatly. he pulled out of the parking lot, the streets were quiet in that comforting way that only happened between midnight and morning.

i shifted in my seat, legs still curled up under me, hoodie pulled tight against the chill. the fries were perfectly warm and my drink sweat in my hand. chris was almost halfway through his burger, taking slow bites, but swallowing quickly.

nick wasn’t done talking about the guy from earlier. “listen, i’m not making this up,” he said, voice low but serious, like he was explaining something important. “he was definitely flirting. like, he wasn’t just polite or friendly. he was really trying to get my attention.”

chris raised an eyebrow but said nothing, still chewing.

“he looked me up and down. like really looked,” nick kept going. “then he smiled, but not just a quick polite smile. his whole face lit up. the kind of smile that’s saying, ‘hey, i’m into you.’”

matt rolled his eyes but giggled anyway. “you sure it wasn’t just a friendly smile? he looked really straight.”

“what? gay people have to look a certain way? is that what you’re saying, matt?” nick accused. everyone burst out in giggles and chuckles.

“no, no, i’m not.” matt shook his head, smiling.

“i don’t know,” nick said, more thoughtful now, chewing on a fry. “he seemed real. not just, like.. interested for the night.”

chris was pulling fries from the shared bag between us, chewing slowly, listening to nick speak half-heartedly, passing me the cup every so often. i didn’t mind. i liked his drink better anyway. matt was driving, one hand on the wheel, the other holding his drink. he sipped it without looking. nick continued talking.

he was already texting the guy he met. like, actively. he’d trail off and i’d catch him glance down at his phone every few seconds, typing fast, pausing, then smiling in that way people do when they’re trying not to.

i nudged him. “you good?”

he didn’t even look up. “mhm.”

chris leaned closer, mock-whispering like we weren’t in a car. “he’s gone.”

nick rolled his eyes but didn’t bother defending himself. he was too busy grinning down at his screen. the glow of it lit up his face, soft around the edges.

i leaned over to peek and saw a name saved with a single emoji next to it. “miles 🌀”

“you already gave him a name emoji?” i asked, teasing.

nick didn’t even blink. “obviously. he earned it.”

“earned it how?” chris chimed in, half-laughing.

nick shrugged but his thumbs kept moving, then he grinned again. “he remembered what candy i liked and he said he’s gonna bring me some next time.”

“next time?” i echoed.

nick looked up, still smiling. “yeah. we’re getting coffee on wednesday– or tuesday.”

matt snorted from the drivers seat. “you’re moving fast, damn.”

“he gave me his number and he hugged me goodbye. am i being lovebombed?,” nick asked

i laughed, “it’s not lovebombing if you’re aware of it,”

nick nodded. chris leaned his head back against the seat. “i like this version of nick.”

“you mean emotionally available?” i asked, grinning.

“no,” chris said, eyes closed. “i mean quiet. when he’s texting, he’s not talking.”

nick and matt both made a face. “wow, chris, that’s rich.” nick said, but his thumbs kept moving.

“what are you even saying?” i asked.

“nothing cool,” nick admitted. “we’re literally talking about cereal. he said he likes frosted flakes and i said that’s basic. now we’re fighting.”

i smiled. “true love.”

all three of them chuckled.

chris’s hand brushed against mine again, fingers loose but intentional, and this time i didn’t hesitate. i curled my pinky around his.

nick made a soft little sound, the kind people make when they’re reading something sweet. he didn’t even try to hide it.

“okay, now i need to know,” i said, leaning over more. “what did he say?”

nick blushed– actually blushed, and tilted his phone so we couldn’t see it. “he said he’s glad i came to the party tonight.”

“aw,” i said, half-melting.

“and,” nick added, barely above a whisper now, “that he wasn’t planning on talking to anyone, but something about me made him want to.”

matt let out a low, impressed whistle. “damn. he’s got game.”

“no,” nick said, his thumbs hovering over the screen. “he’s just.. sincere. i don’t know.”

“what’s he like?” chris asked. “we saw him at the party and you guys looked like you were about to fuckin’ makeout or something.”

nick laughed under his breath, then shrugged. “he’s calm. like, really calm. like i know i talk a lot, but he doesn’t rush to respond. he just kind of.. takes me in. it’s nice.”

i felt my chest tighten a little. “that’s sweet.”

the car had gone quiet again, just the low hum of the road and nick’s occasional typing. chris had moved his hand to my thigh, his thumb brushing slow, absent circles on it. i could feel him thinking. that quiet kind of tension he got when words were building up but refusing to come out.

then, without letting go of me, he shifted, tugging his phone from his hoodie pocket with his free hand. i watched out of the corner of my eye as he opened his notes app and started typing, his brows furrowed just slightly.

when he was done, he turned the screen toward me without a word.

‘Idrk how to say this but I really really appreciate U. U make me feel like myself. And I’m sorry abt tonight. I promise we can be more public from now on. I’m ready’

i blinked down at the words. “chris,” i said softly, already smiling, i didn’t know what to say. i brought his face to mine and pressed a few kisses to his cheeks.

he didn’t pull away, just let me. his skin was warm under my lips, and i felt the little flutter of his breath as his hand found mine again. it wasn’t much, but it felt like everything.

“i wasn’t planning on saying anything tonight,” he murmured. “i didn’t know i needed to.”

i tilted my head just enough to see him, “i’m glad you did.”

from the front seat, matt made a strangled sort of noise. “you guys need a room,”

nick looked up from his phone, deadpan. “just put the car in reverse and let god decide.”

we all giggled and i made a face. “you were just fucking swooning over a guy you met tonight.”

nick looked like he wanted to say something but couldn’t find anything. he settled. “we can both be down bad.”

“i’m not down bad,” i said, though my voice had already gone soft again. chris’s thumb brushed my knuckles once, slow and deliberate. i glanced at him and smiled, quieter now. “okay, maybe i am.”

matt groaned dramatically from the front, but didn’t add anything this time. he just turned the music up a little, some mellow song filling the car like background to the way chris kept looking at me.

the car ride didn’t last much longer. matt pulled into the driveway and then the garage and cut the engine but no one rushed to get out.

nick was still on his phone, grinning at something, and matt leaned forward over the wheel like he needed a minute.

chris didn’t move at all. his hand was still in mine.

i turned to look at him, and he met my gaze like he’d already been waiting. his expression was unreadable at first, all soft focus and something behind his eyes, until he cleared his throat gently.

“you staying over?” he asked, voice low.

my heart skipped a beat, just one. “if i can,”

he nodded once. “of course,”

we all climbed out, chris stayed close, his hand brushing the small of my back as we walked through the door like it was second nature.

the garage door rumbled shut behind us, leaving a soft echo in its place. matt was the first one inside, barely mumbled a “night” before disappearing upstairs to the middle floor.

chris and i stepped inside together, through the door that opened straight into the bottom level of the house. chris’s room was right there, i paused in the hallway with him, toeing off my shoes.

“i’m gonna grab some water,” i said.

chris nodded, “m’kay,” he said, entering his room.

i padded up the stairs, footsteps soft. i glanced down the hallway and saw matt entering his room, a few seconds later, i heard a scratch of furniture as he presumably fell down onto his bed. other than that, everything was quiet except for the faint hum of the fridge.

in the kitchen, i filled a glass from the filter and leaned against the counter. the night still clung to my skin.

“hey,” nick said, appearing up the stairs, still scrolling through his phone.

“hey,” i echoed, watching him out of the corner of my eye.

he leaned against the wall, thumbs moving quickly. “just told him goodnight. took me like five minutes to decide if it was too much.”

“was it?”

he shook his head, almost smiling. “nah. he sent a ‘sweet dreams’ first. i win.”

i took a sip from my glass and tilted my head. “you sticking around down here?”

“nah, just needed to breathe for a sec. and make sure you were okay.” he glanced up at me, briefly serious. “you are, right?”

i nodded, letting the glass rest against the counter. “yeah. tonight was– unexpected. but good.”

“yeah,” he said softly, then nodded toward the stairs. “he looked happy. chris.”

i smiled a little. “he is. i think.”

nick pushed off the wall and gave a quiet little sigh. “good.”

he started up the next flight to his room, still scrolling, still smiling. “night,” he called.

“night, nick.”

i stayed in the kitchen a moment longer, listening to the soft click of his door above me. then i turned off the light and went back downstairs to where chris was waiting.

i stepped inside without knocking. he was stretched out on his bed, one leg dangling off the side, eyes on his phone. the tv was on, some old sitcom i couldn’t remember the name of right now. he looked up when he heard me.

“hey,” he said, soft, tired, like we were already halfway into a conversation.

“hey,” i shut the door behind me.

he shifted to make space and reached a hand out lazily. i climbed onto the bed beside him, folding one leg up underneath me. his hand found my wrist like it always did, thumb brushing over the inside of it.

“you get your water?” he asked, smiling a little.

“yep,” i said, “nick said you looked happy.”

chris giggled. “scary.” he sat up.

“actually? kind of sweet.”

he tilted his head toward me. “you think he’s jealous?”

i raised a brow. “of what?”

“me,” he said simply, like it wasn’t a question, just something he’d been holding onto.

i smiled at him, soft. “no. i think he’s proud of you.”

he smiled. his arm came around me without hesitation, holding me close like it was the most natural thing in the world.

“you looked good tonight,” he said quietly.

i looked up. “yeah?”

“yeah.” he brushed a piece of hair behind my ear, fingers lingering. “it was hard trying not to stare.”

i grinned. “did you fail?”

he leaned in a little. “miserably.”

i turned just enough to kiss the corner of his mouth. “good.”

he moved so our lips were together and kissed me back, slow, unhurried, like there wasn’t anything else worth rushing toward.

i felt his hands on my waist, sliding up my sides, under my hoodie. his touch sent goosebumps up my arms, and i shivered a little, pressing closer to him.

his hands moved to my lower back, pulling me in fully. i could feel him pressing against me now, hard against my hip, and i let out a soft gasp against his mouth. he hummed quietly in response, not breaking the kiss.

he moved to my jaw and then my neck "chris, it's late.." i mumbled. but i didn't stop him, i didn't want him to stop

he murmured against my skin, “you want me to stop?” i felt him smirk and his teeth scraped over my neck. i hummed, not in agreement, but not in disagreement.

“i want you,” he mumbled. “do you want me to stop?” he repeated, pausing his movements.

i shook my head, hands tangling in his hair, trying to pull him closer. “no, keep going, please.”

he chuckled and continued mouthing down my neck, finding a sensitive spot just below my ear. i let my head fall back slightly, giving him more space, and moaned softly when he bit down slightly.

his hands traveled up under my hoodie, he went far enough to where he could tug down my dress, and gently, he did. he then brought his hands behind me and unclasped my bra.

“fuck,” he murmured as he kneaded my boobs. i moaned softly.

he pulled away just enough to look at me, hands moving to the hem of the hoodie and pulling it off me.

i tugged my dress all the way down, leaving me in just my underwear. he pulled back a little to pull his shirt over his head. i took a second to admire his body, i would never get tired of doing that.

he grinned. “you gonna just sit there and stare?”

i giggled and straddled his lap, kissing him again. his hands moved to my hips, fingers almost digging into the soft skin.

he deepened the kiss, tongue swiping at my bottom lip until i opened for him.

one of his hands slid up the inside of my thigh. i moaned into his mouth, shifting my weight against him.

he broke the kiss, “you’re so fucking pretty.” he said, voice nearly a raspy whisper. he flipped us around suddenly, me on my back on the bed with him hovering above me.

i wrapped my legs around his waist and brought him closer, rolling my hips up against his until he groaned and ducked his head to kiss my neck again.

i moaned, hands tugging at the waistband of his jeans. “these need to come off,” i murmured, arching up against him again.

he pulled back slightly, just enough to get the jeans and boxers off, then settled back between my legs.

i ran my manicured hands up the front of his chest, feeling how he inhaled sharply as i drug my nails along his abs and back down over his hips.

he leaned back down, his right hand running up and down the insides of my thighs until he was rubbing me over the fabric of my underwear.

he moved them to the side, and i gasped when his finger ran up my slit.

“oh god..” i moaned.

his fingers circled my clit, spreading my wetness around and pressing a little harder. i moaned again, and could feel him smiling against my neck. “you’re so wet.” he murmured. “you want me that bad?”

“yes,” i nodded.

he moved his hand, pressing a digit inside. i arched up against him, trying to get more. “please..” i said, a little breathless. “chris, please..“

he added a second finger as i moaned.

“don’t tease,” i said, still trying to get more of him. “i need–“ i stopped with a gasp when he curled his fingers. “oh, god.” he let out a laugh.

i smacked his chest lightly, then moaned again when he hit that spot again. “chris, mm!” hips rolling up to meet his hand. he moaned into my neck, the sound sending shivers down my spine.

he pulled his hand out, and i whined, but he was already lining himself up. he slid inside me, my body tensing at the stretch, and we both moaned together. “oh god,” i whimpered, feeling him rock forward slowly. he leaned in to kiss and bite at my neck, giving me a moment to adjust.

he started a slow, steady rhythm as i moaned with each thrust. i moved my hands to his back, fingernails raking over his shoulders. he moaned again, biting down on my shoulder.

“faster,” i moaned. “chris, please– faster.”

he obliged, speeding up. he shifted up a bit, pushing my legs further apart, and changing the angle. i almost cried out loudly, covering my mouth. “there, right there,” i moaned, hands moving to grip his arm.

he continued his rhythm and the heat in my stomach coiled tighter and tighter. “chris– i’m close,” i moaned, my legs tightening around his waist.

“yeah,” he moaned. “me too– shit.” his rhythm was faltering now, hips losing their steady beat.

his hand moved back down between us and he circled my clit with his fingers, picking up where he’d left off. my moans got louder, almost whiny. his fingers rubbed at my clit faster, harder, more desperate.

he was getting even more rough now, driving into me hard and fast. “chris– right there, right there, don’t stop–“ he hit my g-spot a few more times and that was it.

my back came up off the bed and i moaned, feeling my walls flutter around him. he groaned loud and pressed deep “that’s it, god’s you’re so tight.” he moaned as my muscles gripped him. he came inside me, my legs shook and my head rolled back as i moaned louder.

his hips stilled and he moaned, burying his face in my neck. i could feel his warm breath as he pressed open mouthed kisses to my skin. his weight was pinning me down, and we just laid like that for a moment.

he shifted a bit, resting his forehead against mine. “fuck. you look so pretty,” he said. i giggled and brought his face back to mine to kiss him.

he kissed me back, gentler now, before pulling out. he flopped back down next to me, and i leaned over him, running my fingers down his chest. he pulled me against him carefully, and i settled myself on him.

he pressed a kiss into my hair. “love you,” he mumbled, hand gently running up and down my side. i hummed happily, pressing a light kiss to the center of his chest. “love you too.”

i was brought back to reality a few moments later. “"fuck, i still need to shower- wait, what time is it?" i asked. he leaned over to grab his phone from the nightstand.

“uhh..” he squinted at the time. “2:47.”

i groaned. "shit, chris, i have an event tomorrow," i started to get up to head to the shower, chris’ sheet wrapped around me.

he grabbed my wrist, pulling me back down. “no, i miss you.” he said.

“chris, i’m all gross and sticky, and my makeup’s all ruined. i need to shower.” i whined, but i couldn’t help but smile at his words.

“you’re not gross, you’re perfect,” he mumbled, trying to pull me closer.

"i am gross, and i need to shower." i rolled my eyes fondly, standing up again.

he groaned and pouted. “fine. go get your stupid shower.” he said. i giggled, then leaned down to kiss his cheek. “i’ll be back,” i said before getting up and going into his bathroom.

i got to the bathroom and started the shower, while i waited for it to warm up, i took the time to admire the state i was in in the full length mirror. my skin was marked with various hickeys and small bites, my hair messy, my makeup smudged and mostly gone. i touched the spot on neck where he had bit me earlier; i knew it was going to be a dark bruise tomorrow. i decided i would cover it with makeup, wasn’t anything i wasn’t used to.

i was too tired to take a full shower, but i washed my body and face and brushed my teeth with the toothbrush i kept there. when i got out and opened the door back into chris' room, he was clothed and laying back on his bed, scrolling his phone, the tv was still on.

he looked up when i entered the room, and a smirk immediately took over his face at the sight of me in only my towel. “you done being all ‘clean and perfect’ now?” he asked.

"'clean and perfect?' chris, are you seriously not gonna shower?" i retorted.

he shook his head. “it’s like 3 am, i’m not showering.”

i tsked, heading over to look through his dresser and grab something to sleep in. i had my own clothes there, but i liked sleeping in his, i put on my own underwear but grabbed a hoodie and sweatpants that were his.

when i got in bed, he immediately pulled me close so i was laying half on top of him, hands sneaking under the hoodie to settle on my waist.

he rested his chin on the top of my head, and i snuggled into him. it was silent for a few minutes before he spoke. “i know you’re tired, but can we talk about something?”

"about earlier? the whole party thing?" i asked.

he sighed. “yeah,” he said, then paused. i stayed silent, waiting for him to form his thoughts, and he shifted beneath me. “i’m trying so hard to act normal but it’s like–“ he huffed, and i could feel his grip tighten on my waist. “i know most of our friends know we’re dating, and it’s been this like– ‘you can’t tell just anyone’ type of thing, and earlier i said we could be more public, and we really can if that's what you want, but you need to know how insane the internet will be.”

i was quiet for a second. i understood where he was coming from, i leaned up a little so i could look at him. “i know, chris. everything we've done for the last year, every video, every stream, every time we’ve ever looked at each other, it’s all been overanalyzed to the extreme. and they’re never upset with you, they’re upset with me, and i get that that scares you, it kinda scares me too, but...” i paused, shifting my position so i was almost straddling him again, and finding my next words, but he spoke before i could.

“i don’t wanna be scared anymore.” he said. “not when it feels like this..”

he was looking up at me, eyes searching my face and expression, waiting to see if i understood what he was trying to say. i gently slid a hand up to cup his face, thumb running over his jawline in a soothing gesture. “i don’t wanna be scared either,” i said, quietly, and he visibly relaxed slightly, like my answer actually calmed him.

he looked like he wasn't exactly sure where to go from here, so i spoke. "listen, none of this has to be right this second. we don't have to hard launch right away, especially not at 3 in the fucking morning."

he let out a small laugh. “agreed.” he said, and i could feel the tension leave his body. "we can figure this out in the morning, or sometime soon, but right now i just want to sleep. and cuddle." he said, giving my waist a light squeeze.

"yeah," i whispered, snuggling closer to him. "that sounds good." my body felt heavy, the exhaustion of the night finally catching up with me. i could feel the tension in my own muscles start to melt away, and i relaxed into him, letting the comfort of his presence lull me. he was still tracing small patterns on my side, the motion soothing, grounding.

as i settled in, the quiet hum of the room surrounding us, the soft glow of the bedside lamp casting a warm light over everything, the low murmur of the tv on the wall, just enough to create a background noise, barely audible over the sound of our breathing.

chris's fingers had stopped their gentle tracing on my skin, and his breathing had slowed to a steady rhythm. the tv’s volume stayed low, a whisper of a distraction, but not enough to pull me away from the weight of his presence next to me.

his chest rose and fell beneath me, steady and calming, and before i even realized it, my mind started to quiet, too. the sounds of the room, the faint laugh from the tv, everything blurred into one soft, indistinguishable blanket of sound. and then, just like that, the world felt small.

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juulessturn · 2 months ago

Text

home late .

chris sturniolo x reader .

angsty (?) start , sweet ending , smutty everything else .

chris opened the front door and climbed the stairs. it had been a relatively fun, but long night with his friends. his girlfriend was on the couch, looking up at him as he walked in.

it was late– late enough that nick and matt were already asleep. for the past few months, his girlfriend had been more or less living with them. she still had her own place, but neither of them liked sleeping alone, so they always ended up together, no matter whose apartment it was.

he said that he wanted her to stay there but that he wouldn’t be home for most of the day. he promised to be back by midnight, give or take. by now it was well past that, his phone had died hours ago, and without a charger, he hadn’t been able to call or text, and she was pissed.

she didn’t say anything right away, just stared at him, eyebrows raised, arms crossed, the tv still playing something no one was really watching.

“my phone died,” he said quietly. “i couldn’t find a charger, i didn’t mean to disappear.” he walked closer to the couch.

she sighed “you could’ve figured something out. borrowed one. asked someone. did you not want them to know i was waiting? because i was waiting.” her voice wasn’t loud, she didn’t like to yell, and even if she did, it was late, she was tired, and his brothers were asleep.

he nodded, running a hand through his hair as he sat down on the edge of the couch, leaving just enough space between them. “i didn’t think to ask someone, i’m sorry. that’s it though– there was a lot going on, it’s not like they don’t know we’re together.”

she rolled her eyes. “whatever.”

he got closer to her, his hand on her thigh. “‘m sorry.” he repeated. “really. it won’t happen again, i didn’t mean to upset you.” he moved his body down so he was looking up at her.

her eyes met his. “i know you didn’t.” she pursed her lips.

“i missed you.” he said, looking into her eyes intently.

“nice try.” she turned her face away from him.

“i did!” he said, sitting up, “was thinkin’ about you all daaay.”

she glanced at him from the corner of her eye, trying to hold onto the edge of her annoyance, but it was slipping fast. he saw it in the way her lips twitched, just slightly, like they couldn’t decide whether to stay firm or curve into a smile. she ran her tongue over her top teeth, her mouth remaining closed.

“yeah?” she asked, her voice cool but curious.

“yeah,” he nodded, edging even closer, bringing an arm over her shoulder.

she didn’t lean into him, but she didn’t refuse his arm around her. he took it as an okay to nuzzle his face in her neck, placing gentle kisses all around it.

he hummed into her neck before he spoke. “love you.”

“i know, chris.” she said simply. he laughed softly and continued trailing kisses up her neck.

after a moment he spoke. “tell me you love me too,” he mumbled into her skin. he moved his kisses up to her ear. “please,” he whispered, almost whimpering.

“i- mm.” she gasped as he nipped at her earlobe. “chris-” she tried to speak but he spoke again before she could.

“i need to hear you say it, baby.” he whined.

“love you too.” she said immediately. he repositioned himself, bringing their lips together, his hands moved to her thighs and waist, the gentleness quickly being abandoned.

chris moved closer so she was almost in his lap, their tongues intertwining, as her arms hung around his neck.

he pulled her fully onto his lap, his hands grabbing at her hips and ass, and his kisses becoming more urgent

“mmph-” she moaned into his mouth. “you want me, huh?” she breathed out between kisses. he let out a low, quiet, groan, moving his kisses back to her neck, sucking a bit.

“yes,” they were both breathless, but he promptly went back to working on her neck, his hands sliding under her shirt. “please. been wanting you all day..” he said, and her back moved against his hands, leaning into his touch.

she quirked a brow. “you haven’t even been here and you’ve been thinking about me?”

he nodded. “can’t stop,” he said against her neck. “ever.”

she moved her hands to his face, pulling him to look at her. “aren’t you feeling sweet,” she hooked her right arm over him again and brought their faces back together.

he smiled against her lips and deepend the kiss once again, rubbing his hands up and down her back. she brought her hand down to his dick and pressed him over his jeans.

he let out a soft gasp and leaned his head back a little, his breath catching in his throat. “oh fuck–” he managed to get out.

she chuckled at his reaction. he looked at her with wide eyes. “don’t laugh at me.” he whined, his breath quickening. as a response she continued pressing him, and he let out a low moan, only causing her to giggle again.

"stop– mm, stop laughing." he repeated, his body tense under her touch. every sound he made seemed to encourage her more, and he could see it in her eyes - she was enjoying this. as she continued her ministrations, pressing down harder. his head fell forward, resting on her shoulder as he groaned softly against her neck.

"i can't help it...," she whispered, her voice low and seductive. he could feel the heat radiating from her body, her breath soft and ticklish on his ear as she spoke. she continued to tease him, moving her hand excruciatingly slowly, and he could feel his self-control slipping.

just then, he suddenly picked her up, her arms instinctively wrapping around his neck for support. “chris!” the smirk on his face made her heart race.

“shh, baby, my brothers are asleep.” he covered her mouth with one hand as he carried her with the other, all the way to his room downstairs.

his door was open when they entered and he closed it with his foot, setting her down on the bed in an instant.

he leaned over her, his body caging her in. his hands roamed over her, tracing every curve with practiced ease.

he leaned down to her ear, his voice low and rough. "i want you. i need you. now." he was desperate. his hands moved back under her shirt, his touch leaving a trail of fire in their wake.

he brought his mouth to hers, the kiss filled with hunger and lust. his lips moved over hers, his tongue seeking entrance once again. she parted her lips for him, melting into the kiss, her hands tangling in his hair.

he broke the kiss only to remove her shirt, his eyes roaming over her bare skin with unabashed admiration. “shit, baby.” he breathed out, as if it were his first time seeing her.

she could feel his gaze on her, hot and heavy. his words went straight to her core, her body reacting instantly. he made her feel desired and wanted, and she loved every second of it. she needed more. he knew it, and he gave it to her.

he moved his hand downwards, feeling her through her shorts, and when he pressed hard enough, he felt a subtle dampness. his eyes darkened at the discovery. she needed him just as badly as he needed her. he let out a sharp exhale, feeling the warmth under his fingers. "you're ready for me, huh?" he said, his voice thick with lust. he moved his hand a little, applying more pressure, his touch slow and teasing, knowing it would drive her crazy.

“mm. yes, please, chris.” she begged. how the tables had turned. unlike her, however, he immediately obliged, pulling down her shorts and unbuckling his own belt with urgency. he pulled his pants and boxers down in one movement, taking off his shirt a moment after.

he positioned himself over her, his body settling between her legs. she could feel his dick against her, and she shivered at the contact. he looked at her, his gaze burning, and she nodded, giving him permission. he pushed into her, slowly at first, and with a low moan. giving her time to adjust. but she was impatient, her body arching off the bed, desperate for him.

he gave in to her need, his pace quickening, his movements becoming more urgent. her moans were like music to his ears, fueling his own ecstasy. she wrapped her legs around him, pulling him even closer, her nails digging into his back. they were a sweaty, tangled mess.

this was what they both needed, the raw desire for each other. they moved together, bodies in perfect sync, their pleasure building with every passing second. her hands roamed over him, touching, grasping, claiming.

his lips found hers, their kiss desperate and sloppy. there was no time for words, only incoherent moans and strangled gasps. they were completely consumed by each other, everything else faded away.

he was getting close, and he wanted to bring her there with him. he moved faster, pushing deeper, angling his hips the way he knew drove her crazy. her body responded, so did her voice. her movements became more erratic, her voice pitching itself higher. he could feel her tightening around him, and he knew she was close too. his vision was starting to go hazy, his mind completely clouded by pleasure.

her muscles clenched around him, and he reached down between the two of them, his fingers finding her clit, his touch precise. her body trembled under him. she felt completely overwhelmed by the pleasure he was giving her. his breathing was heavy and ragged, now he could tell he was just as close as he was. "oh god, don't stop," she gasped, her words coming out in labored pants.

he had one hand on the headboard, steadying himself, continuously rubbing her clit with the other as he pounded into her. he pulled her closer, their bodies as close as they could possibly be. her moans became louder and louder, she moved her hips in sync with his, meeting his thrusts with equal fervor. she wanted all of him, and he was giving her everything. her hands found their way to his face, her lips meeting his in a desperate kiss. the words that escaped her were incoherent, a mix of his name and pleas for more.

"'m close, 'm so close, chris." she spoke through her moans.

he could hear the edge to her voice, and he let out a guttural moan, his head falling forward, "me too, baby-- ah--" he panted, his movements growing sloppy. he could feel the tension coiled deep within them both, ready to snap at any moment.

her back arched off the bed, and he could see the sheen of sweat glistening on her skin. he was losing control, he could feel her walls clenching around him, and he knew it couldn’t be more than a few seconds before they both came undone.

"ah- fuck– come with me, baby-" he gasped out. the pressure built to a breaking point, ready to crash over them. “please, let go with me," he whispered, his words thick with need.

yes, it was what he said, but god, the way he said it. it was all she needed. it pushed her over the edge. she could feel it. the wave of pleasure cresting, about to crash down over her. she gasped out his name, her body tensing as it overcame her.

he could feel her clenching around him, her body shaking with release, and it was his undoing. the sight of her, lost in ecstasy, tipped him over the edge. he groaned, his hips stuttering as he found his own release. he pulled out and buried his face in the crook of her neck, his arms wrapped tightly around her.

their bodies trembled in the aftermath. they lay there for a moment, their breaths coming in ragged gasps, their hearts pounding in unison. he lifted his head, looking down at her, a slight smirk on his face.

"you're so fuckin’ pretty, you know that?" he said softly, his thumb tracing over her flushed cheek. his touch was gentle, a contrast to the intensity they had just shared. she looked up at him, almost not hearing him.

she said nothing, only giggled. she leaned into him, her laughter fading into a quiet sigh. he leaned to kiss her again, slower this time, and she just curled closer, her fingers resting lightly on his chest. he wrapped his arms around her, holding her like she was something fragile.

eventually, the room went quiet, their breaths slowed. somewhere between the warmth, they both drifted off, tangled up in each other.

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/ an / if u couldn't tell this was not proofread and was written over the course of a few days . also it's currently one am as i'm posting this . hope u liked it regardless

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