kayaea-blog - Tumblr blog

[kayaea-blog]

company,

can we / we keep / keep each other company?

friday afternoon rolls around with not enough to do and too many hours to waste. she spends the walk back to her dorm thinking about clubs, and extracurriculars that she quit, and how maybe she should re-join society now. 

the dorm is quiet, her roommate absent. kaya puts her bag down on a chair and plops down on her bed. everyone is so busy and so preoccupied, and she remembers how she used to spend this time at the gymnasium practicing routines and making sure gwen doesn’t faint. she stares at her phone for a moment, and scrolls through names for a moment.

( msg to mark ) heyy :):

[kayaea-blog]

rip nara’s long (especially blonde) hair </3

[kayaea-blog]

eventually, she turns so that she’s facing him instead of a gray wall. her vision is blurry with tears, and his figure is nothing but a bunch of wet splotches clumped together. still, she hears him. still, she feels him.

her entire body aches. she wonders if he feels it.

“he’s dead,” she says, feeling like she has said those words together far too many times.

four letter word,

[kayaea-blog]

she shrugs, taking her drink off the bar and mixing idly. “whatever. i want spicy chicken wings, though.” and she watches as her friend’s eyes glow pink, as the man signs his soul off to a diminished paycheck, and she laughs to herself.

“tsk--that’s cheating,” she teases, bringing the rim of her drink closer to her lips. the smell of alcohol and sugar is intoxicating and nostalgic. too many wild nights and her mind is constantly afloat these days. 

this is what makes us girls,

[kayaea-blog]

these are words she never thought she’d hear again, and lips she never thought she’d feel again. kaya leans into him and smiles--spoiled and in love and so caught in the moment that she forgets the time. but what is time other than a few numbers and an imagined hand? he is warm, and his heart is beating, and for the first time in weeks the sun shows.

[kayaea-blog]

[kayaea-blog]

she chuckles, never pulling away for a moment; arms wrapped around him still, as if eternity is trying to separate them and she won’t let it. kaya turns her head and buries her face in his chest--if only to remember the smell of his shirt. the smell of summer and rain, and everything she can ever love. silence shared and quiet parted, and moments passed like frozen seconds. kaya lifts her head to look at him, and she stares for a moment. and she presses a kiss to his jaw. whispering, “i love you,” as she continues to watch her sun.

[kayaea-blog]

“I need to ask you something”

24 do you like how you are now in life?

“who wouldn’t like to be me in their life?” *hair flip* (no, but i wouldn’t want to be anyone else.)

[kayaea-blog]

"I need to ask you something"

18 when was a time when you were at peace?

“when i first found kay. when i found out he was my brother, and that i would never ever be alone.”

[kayaea-blog]

she bites her lip, pinches his side, gravitates back close to him like a magnet. can’t find a reason for needing to kiss him everytime she tries to say anything--so she kisses him, touching his jaw. once, twice, thrice, four times. he tastes so sweet again, and so warm again, and she kisses him just one more time. “i’m even going to the gym now,” she replies proudly, returning to conversation. it’s just that when you’ve gone through life and death with someone, everything else but the other person’s heartbeat sounds like noise. “we should run tomorrow morning. or... do something ... physical ...” she says to the air, to the future up ahead, to the time she won’t ever let anything steal from her again.

[kayaea-blog]

she hates how new his voice sounds, and the warmth of his hand, and the way he speaks. she hates that the universe took any of him away from her for even a fraction of a second. but he’s around and she can’t quite think of hating anything. “i’ll take care of it,” she assures. “after class? do you have practice?” she lifts her head to look at him. “how’s the team, by the way?”

[kayaea-blog]

she lays her head on his shoulder, sitting a little closer and admiring the way their hands look again--the way his hands look. sun-kissed and moving and once again alive. with the slightest pout, she nods. she thinks to say words but her chin tilts on its own, lips searching the touch of his lips before she can manage words, "i miss you all the time too." a pause. quieter words smiled in the attractive way of pretend secrets. "come over later. sleep in my room."

[kayaea-blog]

she flashes him a smile. her pretty smile. her kaya smile--magnetic and beautiful and attractive. the kind of smile supermodels spend hours practicing in front of mirrors. the kind of smile people look at in posters.

"just... looking for a conversation," she says, pleasant and lovely, taking her first bite of lunch and glancing over. no way to answer no to the way she says, "do you mind?" referring to sitting beside him, to company, to conversation and mutually assured destruction.

mercurial baby,

[kayaea-blog]

"Kaya. Darling. You're not busy, are you?"

caught off guard, she turns around; immediately beaming at the sight of him. heart doing little jumps. “no,” she answers without thinking, looking at him sweetly and reaching for his hand to hold. “what’s up?”

[kayaea-blog]

"I need to ask you something"

what is your favourite season? why?

“winter, obviously–since i am winter.”

[kayaea-blog]

“I need to ask you something”

28 if you had the opportunity to write a letter to someone you had hurt, what will you say? 

dear person i hurt,

i’m sorry. you should have worn a thicker helmet.

- k.

[kayaea-blog]

eaxkay replied to your post: “I need to ask you something”

lame

this is y no1 lovs u, kay