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Hi friends. We're officially at the emergency gofundme stage of struggling to keep up with bills. My wife's car was towed today for late car payments. We are both disabled and have a ton of appointments we need to get to, including my surgery at the end of the month. They won't be able to get to work anymore, and we're already down one income because I can't work right now.

We have one week (until the 24th) to pay off over $1,200 or their car will be auctioned off. We CANNOT get by without our car. Please, if you're able to give anything at all, it would make a big difference. Even if you can't, please please reblog this.

Kitty for tax

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honk it through as a crew

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us when djenks gives us a shred of hope:

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Happy sexual sunday. Today I'm thinking about Ed humping things (as per usual)

And what if Ed had a favorite pillow to hump when he got in the mood for it. It's soft and silky and just right for teasing himself when he wants to be a desperate little mess, just grinding away on it and gasping and whimpering for relief because it's so hard to get enough stimulation to actually get himself off with it. And what if Stede caught him humping it one day, and told him to keep going so he could watch? And then, when Ed was begging for more, Stede flipped him over and fucked him with his face in his pillow so he was just screaming into his own mess?

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this is just my opinion but i think any good media needs obsession behind it. it needs passion, the kind of passion that's no longer "gentle scented candle" and is now "oh shit the house caught on fire". it needs a creator that's biting the floorboards and gnawing the story off their skin. creators are supposed to be wild animals. they are supposed to want to tell a story with the ferocity of eating a good stone fruit while standing over the sink. the same protective, strange instinct as being 7 and making mud potions in pink teacups: you gotta get weird with it.

good media needs unhinged, googling-at-midnight kind of energy. it needs "what kind of seams are invented on this planet" energy and "im just gonna trust the audience to roll with me about this" energy. it needs one person (at least) screaming into the void with so much drive and energy that it forces the story to be real.

sometimes people are baffled when fanfic has some stunning jaw-dropping tattoo-it-on-you lines. and i'm like - well, i don't go here, but that makes sense to me. of fucking course people who have this amount of passion are going to create something good. they moved from a place of genuine love and enjoyment.

so yeah, duh! saturday cartoons have banger lines. random street art is sometimes the most precious heart-wrenching shit you've ever seen. someone singing on tiktok ends up creating your next favorite song. youtubers are giving us 5 hours of carefully researched content. all of this is the impossible equation to latestage capitalism. like, you can't force something to be good. AI cannot make it good. no amount of focus-group testing or market research. what makes a story worth listening to is that someone cares so much about telling it - through dance, art, music, whatever it takes - that they are just a little unhinged about it.

one time my friend told me he stayed up all night researching how many ways there are to peel an orange. he wrote me a poem that made me cry on public transportation. the love came through it like pith, you know? the words all came apart in my hands. it tasted like breakfast.

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Old Man Yaoi Tournament Round 1

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Sorry to be a party pooper on the pisspoor website but it drives me so insane that so much horror media that is very explicitly a stand in for critiquing systemic issues can only be consumed through wanting to fuck your weird little guys. Id even make peace with people who did both but it’s so jarring to be moved by a piece and then be dumb enough to go into tags and 90% of posts are like “oooh the racist guy who is a metaphor for corrective rape is soooo daddy”

Monsterfucking is fine, idgaf about cnc stories and “dark themes” in writing, I’m not kink shaming the interest, I am questioning the outlet. Did you understand anything that happened on your screen yes or no?

Whatever your answer could you at least add some tag to it that lets me filter out your nazi x self fanfics?

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I have realized that the perfect form of media must have a delicate balance between absolutely heart wrenching pure emotional devastation and the most ridiculous nonsense you have ever seen in your whole life

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is this https://www.tumblr.com/knifewieldingenby/684326741125316608/decided-to-take-some-inspiration-from-the-current?source=share meant as a femflux flag or like a combo femflux+nonbinary flag?

It's a combination of both :)

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For @ofmdblog celebrating 1k! Day 1 - fave character: Edward Teach (born on a beach)

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our flag means death edit meme • (1/3) scenes → “what makes ed happy?”

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"If you don't have your pronouns in your bio you'll be blocked" ????

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Me, taking my adhd meds: okay, now I shouldn't have any meltdowns today, I shouldn't get stuck on simple tasks, and I shouldn't get so overstimmed that I want to bash my head into a wall.

My ADHD: Got it! It's gonna be a good day!

My autism:

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(This is kind of a long update)

I haven't really been around this year and I don't think I ever said why. So for those of you who are curious, here's the drama:

Basically, a breakup. Abusive partner of 6 months and friend of 8 years blew my life up. I latched onto art and books to keep my head above water. Made a lot of cool stuff (I'll share some of it under a readmore) and read some cool books, which I'll also share because I have no self control and I need book fandom friends lol. I also started work, and it's been disastrous for my chronic pain, and by extension, my mental health

I did find out this year that a lot of my sleep issues were due to me just having a different circadian rhythm. Delayed sleep phase circadian rhythm disorder, they call it, cuz they gotta make every bit of human nature that diverges from capitalist plans into a disorder. It's been great having periods of actually feeling rested and energized (I still need ambien or else I don't sleep, but at least now I feel rested when I wake up) but it's also been kinda lonely. Books have helped with that, too.

So yeah, I've been dealing with essentially a massive betrayal (like, I found out my ex gf/ex-best friend went behind my back and sabotaged my relationship with my best friend of a few years ago, cuz she knew if we got together and talked I would find out how atrociously she abused him when they were dating. That relationship was manipulation central and breaking up with her got me kicked from the whole polycule. It was super fun and not at all traumatizing to realize that the bonds I'd formed in that group meant nothing to anyone else unless I was dating someone in it. Amatonormativity is a bitch. None of them have even checked up on me this year, so I guess my worries that they only wanted me around for my body were kinda spot on. Yayyyyy)

Anyway, here are some awesome books I read this year. Most of these are queer and/or racially diverse, and if you want to know more about any, feel free to ask! Yes, this is me trying to get you to read some of my favorite books:

The City We Became, N.K. Jemisin - adult urban fantasy/science fantasy, hands down one of the coolest fucking books I've ever read! New York City comes to life and a ragtag group of humans-turned-embodiments-of-the-city have to fight an interdimensional eldrich nightmare. Main cast is almost entirely compromised of people of color. A duology.

Light from Uncommon Stars, Ryka Aoki - adult science fantasy, lesbian and trans-centric. Woman sells her soul to Hell and, in order to get it back, has to convince seven other violin prodigies to sell their souls. She finds her seventh soul in runaway trans teenager, Katrina. Also alien Milf comes to Earth to hide her family from a galactic Endplague. Read the trigger warnings on this one.

Your Shadow Half Remains, Sunny Moraine - adult queer horror, sudden "virus" makes people snap and violently kill people who look them in the eyes. Our MC has isolated herself off in the middle of nowhere and kept herself alive by avoiding people and eye contact, until Ellis (nonbinary neighbor) moves in and she can't help but want to look. Unreliable narrator, novella.

Instructions for Dancing, Nicola Yoon - Wanna cry? Wanna absolutely sob? YA speculative contemporary romance about a teen who catches her dad cheating on her mom and stops believing in love. One day she's "cursed" to see how couples' relationships started and will end if she sees them kiss. Meanwhile, she's convinced to join a dance studio and competition, where she's paired up with a dude she really doesn't want to fall in love with (don't worry, he's very lovable, not one of those asshole love interests). I forgot books could make me cry until I read this, but it's absolutely wonderful and made me realize that I do actually like well-written romances.

Bliss Montage, Ling Ma - adult speculative literary fiction. Eight short stories about being a first-gen Chinese immigrant, belonging, loss, abusive relationships (romantic and platonic), and figuring out what you want in life. Read. The. Trigger. Warnings. This one doesn't get enough credit for being equal parts weird as fuck and absolutely devastating.

Bone, Yrsa Daley-Ward - some of the best poetry I've read and the first book I read in like six years. Brought me back to life. Again, trigger warnings. I don't know how to read light, fluffy things.

Some others that I haven't finished yet but I still 100% recommend (I'll keep this brief)

The Weight of Blood - Tiffany D. Jackson

Our Wives Under the Sea - Julia Armfield

The Poet X - Elizabeth Acevedo

Legendborn - Tracy Deonn

And now for some art!

If you made it this far, I hope you find $20 on the ground this weekend.

I'm still a fandom weirdo, but I'll keep this blog focused on visual media. If you want book fandom, check out my booklr @lexreadsdiversely

Love you all!

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the COVID 2024-2025 vaccine is now available in some areas, please look into getting yours ASAP

i am a COVID survivor who is dealing with long COVID and permanent lung damage due to having caught the virus in October of 2023. this isn't a flu or a cold. this disease causes serious, permanent long term damage. i'm still struggling with even worse brain fog than i already had previously and sometimes it becomes extremely hard for me to breathe, even in good conditions.

COVID has been surging like crazy in the US this summer due to folks socializing more closely and masking no longer being required in most places. social distancing does not happen here anymore. we need to protect ourselves even while there are not mandates and rules in place stating that you MUST be masked (you still should be masking).

the CDC is stating that everyone ages 6 months and older should get the 2024–2025 COVID-19 vaccine:

even if you have been vaccinated in the past you still need to keep up with current vaccines as their protection decreases over time, and COVID continues to mutate and become different strains that are resistant to previous vaccines. staying up to date and masking are the only ways to stay safe. viruses mutate to adapt to their hosts, and COVID is no different.

there are currently 5 variants of the Omicron strain of COVID that are responsible for the uptick in recent cases:

from a COVID survivor who doesn't want to go through this shit a second time: vaccinate. wear your masks. wash your hands. social distance. quarantine when sick. take this seriously. it's been 4 years and COVID has done nothing but prove it is here to stay unless we make a huge change in our society.

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Okay confession time: I still have not seen season 2 all the way through. I've seen a good chunk of it via YouTube and tumblr osmosis, but I haven't sat down and seen it straight through. And now I don't have Max :( so if Netflix wants to pick it up, that would be great.

.....wait, do I have Netflix??? Does anyone know where else I could watch season 2?