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I find it so funny that Sanderson made spren work like bluetooth headphones everytime they are far away from their bonded human.

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Dalinar: Can you please stop killing innocents during the storms?

Stormfather: I’m a storm it cannot be avoided

Dalinar: Coward

Stormfather: …😧

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<3

Loki x Reader: Bound - 7

Ok that's all I have written, I wrote myself into a corner and I don't know how to finish it :( feedback would be super helpful

-

You were lying on a bed. You felt the snake still wrapped around your wrist. Your eyes fluttered open and you looked around the barren room. Your vision started to return, and you registered Loki sitting in a chair, beside your bed. There was a soft beeping in time to your heart.

“What happened?” You mumbled, feeling stiff in your body, numerous bandages were wrapped around your injuries.

The door opened and a tall blond-haired man entered. Thor, the link told you.

Loki’s eyes opened up and he straightened up in his chair.

A hammer held loosely in Thor’s hand as he looked around the room. “Loki what the hel is happening?”

“What did Odin tell you?” Loki asked.

Thor glanced at Loki then back to you. “He said you were being punished for your transgressions.”

Loki chuckled, his lips curling. “Indeed.”

Thor glanced again between the two of you. “Who is this mortal?”

“Your favorite pet’s half sister.” Loki replied, he still hadn’t straightened up in his chair. He seemed as exhausted as you felt.

“Jane? What did you do to Jane?” Thor snarled, holding the hammer out.

“I don’t know why I bother.” Loki muttered, shaking his head.

You opened your mouth. “He didn’t do anything. What’s going on? Someone please explain what the hell is happening.”

Thor looked over at you. “Are you entangled in my brother’s web of lies?”

You shook your head and lifted your snake bound wrist. “Only through what Odin did.”

Thor’s eyes narrowed, studying the snake. Realization crossed his face as he moved nearer to hold the rope, fingers smoothing along the runes.

“Father banished you to Midgard?” Thor murmured, sounding stunned. “And he didn’t tell me?”

Loki didn’t answer, he simply shrugged.

“Brother what is happening?”

“Odin sent me to Midgard, hoping I would be as easily swayed as you had been by a pretty human. He seemed to have forgotten the humans were still a bit cross with me.” Loki said.

Thor glanced at him then back to you. “Why didn’t you tell me there were powers beyond you doing this? I asked you who controls the would be king.” Loki’s eyes flashed but he didn’t interrupt Thor. Thor continued, “if you had told me… we could’ve stopped this together, before it got to that point.”

“Do you really believe that?” Loki asked, he sounded bored and resigned.

Thor growled. “If I had known something had hurt you, had sent you on this path…”

Loki stood up, eyes flashing again. “Would you have cared? Would you have not seen me as weak for my failed death? For succumbing to the will of an infinity stone?” He spat the words out angrily.

Thor floundered for a moment, glancing at you for some sort of reassurance.

“The snake has it’s bond.” You muttered, feeling timid. “I don’t even know how this works.”

“Brother.” Thor began softly.

Loki rolled his eyes and slapped away Thor’s outstretched hand. “Don’t bother.”

“Loki, please.” Thor tried again. “There’s a serious threat approaching Midgard and you could warn me, we could stop it, together.”

“And why would I do that?”

“Surely you feel something for the beings you would have ruled.” Thor replied.

Loki tilted his head. “Time and again, I continue to wonder if that miniscule thing you call a brain is ever used.”

“Loki enough with the insults, talk plainly.” Thor growled.

“You want me to bare my soul to you? Plead for mercy? I’m beyond saving, the only reason I’m still in this room is Odin’s damned magic holding me to this woman.”

“We could have protected you.” Thor pleaded softly.

Loki barked a short cold laugh. “You can’t even protect yourself.”

-

“Loki.” Thor tried again.

Loki crossed his arms and sat down, staying stubbornly quiet.

“Can you stand?” Thor asked you.

“I’m really exhausted after everything, I think I could manage though.”

Thor pursed his lips. “I wish to go see Jane but I think getting Loki home is more important.”

Loki rolled his eyes and didn’t move. “I don’t have a home.”

“Mother would say differently.” Thor replied.

Loki’s mouth twitched, his sarcastic quip failing at the mention of Frigga. Frigga, Loki’s adopted mother, a skilled warrior despite outside appearances – the bond told you. You felt Loki’s fondness for Frigga.

“We’re going back to Asgard.” Thor said.

“The bifrost?”

“Is repaired. Before I found out you were here, I was attempting to restore order to the realms. They had plunged into chaos without Asgard’s intervention.”

Loki scoffed but didn’t elaborate.

The door opened and a man in red armor appeared, Iron Man, and behind him Director Fury.

Fury spoke, “Thor, we need to talk.”

Tony lifted his helmet. “I think the security council is beyond talking now. They want Loki to answer for his crimes.” Tony jerked his head towards Loki.

“There are powers at work beyond your understanding.” Thor growled.

“Then explain them.” Fury snapped.

Thor scowled and shook his head. “What part of beyond your understanding do you not grasp?”

Loki chuckled.

Thor shot Loki a serious look before once more addressing Nick and Tony. “Loki needs to be moved off world, if what is to come reaches this world, humanity will suffer greatly.”

“So just like that?” Fury asked, crossing his arms.

Thor nodded. “Yes, we’re leaving. Now. Brother?” He grabbed Loki’s arm and pulled him to his feet. Loki sighed and lifted you from the bed.

You blinked, looking around in shock and feeling your face flush. Thor pressed past Tony and the director in the doorway. Loki followed, smiling lightly at the two men and waving.

Fury tried to speak but your trio was already halfway outside.

“Heimdall.” Thor said calmly, looking at the sky.

Loki’s grip tightened on you and the bifrost opened.

You were flying through space, stars and colors swirling around you. It was exhilarating. You tried to keep your eyes open, to see everything while gripping Loki’s arms for dear life.

Then you were still, standing in a large domed room.

“Welcome home, Thor.” Heimdall pulled his blade from the center of the room, closing the bifrost. Heimdall narrowed his eyes, “Loki.”

“Excellent to see you gatekeeper.”

“I see the bond is working on you.” Heimdall inclined his head towards the snake.

Looking around, still in Loki’s arms, you realized the snake was longer than it had been. You tilted your head curiously before looking once more at Heimdall.

Loki scowled and Heimdall laughed softly. “Your escort will be here shortly, Thor, a cell has been prepared for Loki.”

“Great…” you mumbled, “another cell. Are you going to torture us too?”

Heimdall looked at you seriously. “The queen has ordered Loki’s safe travel. This passes to you, mortal.”

A skiff landed outside the dome. At any moment you expected Loki to set you down, but for whatever reason he kept you curled in his arms. You searched the bond, trying to read him, but it was weirdly quiet.

-

Once more you found yourself in another clear prison cell, except this one had two beds, close enough together for the rope.

“I must talk with father, this is a serious matter approaching us.” Thor said from outside the cell.

Loki had set you on the bed and sat down on the other one. “By all means, brother.”

Thor turned and left and there was a new presence in the cell.

Loki’s eyes flickered in recognition, landing on the woman, Frigga.

“Loki.” She greeted him warmly, before stating your name and greeting you just as warmly. She moved nearer and inspected the snake. “It’s grown since it was attached. You’re doing well, my son.”

Loki glared at her, though you could feel conflicting emotions through the snake.

Frigga ignored his look and turned to study you. “It is a curious matter that you would be the human chosen. To be the half sister of the woman Thor loves.”

You rubbed the back of your head. You couldn’t really think of what to say so you merely nodded.

“I imagine the empathy bond, which has grown considerably, has helped. Hard to hate someone that you can feel so much from them.” Frigga smiled, she seemed pleased, looking between you and Loki.

Loki raised his eyebrows, eyes shutting for a moment as he smiled sardonically at her. “Yes, feeling the mortal’s pain has been truly enlightening.”

Frigga sighed heavily. “Loki this is for your own growth. Thor had such a good experience, we hoped the same would happen for you.”

Loki reached towards Frigga, his hand brushing through the illusion and she frowned as she slowly vanished from sight.

After a moment of silence, he looked at you. “And now you’ve met my adoptive mother.”

“She seems nice.” You offered, trying to sound supportive.

Loki shook his head wearily and grunted before laying down on his back on the other bed.

A long period of silence followed.

-

You stood up, and said, “hey wait Loki! The snake grew.” You almost had double the distance that you’d had back on Earth, Midgard.

With the length of the snake now, you could stand on opposite ends of the cell and not experience pain.

You beamed at Loki. “Does this mean…?” You trailed off as he gave you a quailing look. Probably not best to strain this new degree of growth. Falling silent, you made your way back to your bed, but you couldn’t stop smiling. “How long do you think they’ll keep us here?”

“Until you die, or I change to the degree Odin wants, I imagine.” Loki was lying on his back, tossing a metal cup in the air, catching it, and repeating.

“What? I die?”

Loki shrugged, sitting up. “I’m to wile away the rest of my existence in here, so that should be around four thousand or so Midgard years.”

“Maybe we can cheat the system somehow?”

Loki arched his brow. “Unlikely, this magic is very conditional.”

You sighed and leaned back on your bed, lacing your fingers behind your head and stared at the blank ceiling. “Still though.”

More time passed, you felt yourself dozing off.

-

You woke with a start. Loki hadn’t moved. His eyes were shut tight but he seemed to be sleeping.

Yawning, you got out of your bed and made your way towards the front of the cell. Two trays of food lay there. It seemed someone had visited during the night. Or you figured it was night, it was difficult to see how time passed in this place.

You looked around the cell and noticed new amenities had arrived. There was a small half wall that blocked off a bathroom area, complete with a shower. Blinking, you moved nearer it, keeping your hand back in case you moved too far from Loki.

The water to the shower turned on easily and you smiled, holding your hand under its stream.

You looked down at your clothes. Apparently at some point since earth, someone had changed your clothes to make it easier to dress around the snake. You glanced over your shoulder to see if Loki was looking, then decided at this point, you couldn’t care. There was nothing you could hide from him, thanks to the link. You sighed heavily and began to strip, stepping under the warm water. You stood for a few moments smiling at the comforting shower.

You felt something through the link and looked over your shoulder.

Loki had moved closer, though he kept his back to you.

As you stood under the water, you fought back hisses of pain, realizing the very real wounds from the compound still lingered. You trailed your fingers along the jagged skin on various parts of your body. They were beginning to heal, but even so, the pain lingered.

“Thanks.” You mumbled, glancing in Loki’s direction again. Though you kept your back towards him as much as possible. You wanted to pretend there was some modesty maintained.

You felt a pang of sympathy through the bond, and for the first time, you realized it wasn’t your own emotions, this had come from Loki.

You twisted your neck to look over at him and saw his gaze fixated on you. A blush crept across your body as you looked down, trying to know what he was thinking.

Guilt.

You blinked hard, crossing your arms and twisting slightly to better look at him. “It’s not really your fault, you know.” You muttered.

“Isn’t it? Damn this link.” Loki hissed, tearing his gaze from you and studying the snake.

You shrugged, back to him again and appreciating the feel of water that stayed warm even after this time. “Hard to be the god of mischief and lies when I know what you’re feeling.”

Loki’s eyes darkened and he scowled, looking away again.

“I mean, there’s nothing you can hide from me, might as well face it.” You turned off the water, content with the single bar of soap though your hair really needed tending.

There was a pair of fresh clothes that you hadn’t noticed before getting in the shower. You frowned, before carefully dressing, once again noting that they were designed to work around the snake. “That’s thoughtful.” You mumbled, studying the strange Asgardian clothes.

“Frigga truly is the epitome of thoughtful.” Loki muttered.

“You want me to sit here and you can shower?” You chose to ignore his jabs.

Loki looked away. “I’m fine.”

You could feel his pain through the link and arched your brow. Now you could feel his anger at him himself.

“Stop that.” He snapped, spinning back to face you.

You shrugged. “It’s not my fault I can feel everything. I wish I couldn’t feel some of your pain, honestly. The emotions aren’t easy either. I have my own life of problems, I don’t need yours added to it.”

“You think it onesided?”

You opened and closed your mouth for a moment before answering, “you hadn’t mentioned being affected, so I was figuring…” you trailed off, not sure what you had really figured.

Loki was no longer wearing his armor, instead in a green top and black trousers. You wondered when he had changed. Perhaps it was magic, and while you were sleeping.

“Forgot you could use magic to change your outfit. Whoever left these clothes accounted for the snake though.” You spun where you stood, looking down as the skirt of the dress spun with you.

After a moment, you came back to your bed, stopping to pick up one of the trays of food and began nibbling on the alien Asgardian food.

You wrinkled your nose at Loki, biting back a smirk.

“I do not smell.” He snapped, reading your thoughts.

You shrugged. “You can’t tell, bet everyone else can though.”

Loki rolled his shoulders, standing from the bed and made his way to the halfwall. He stepped under the spray of water, staring silently at the faucet.

“I won’t look. You’re just going to ruin the clothes.” You grumbled softly.

“What do you care woman?” He snapped at you.

“What are you trying to hide?” As you asked, you could mentally see the scars that littered Loki’s body, from his own eyes. Your face softened and you swallowed hard.

“I told you not to pity me.” Loki snarled.

Though it was difficult to take him seriously looking like a wet cat in the shower. You held your hands up defenselessly. Still the emotions flooded through you.

Loki growled again, stepping sopping wet from the water and angrily threw the soap bar at the golden shimmering outer wall of the cell. The soap hissed and fizzled, burning by magic against the barrier before sliding to the ground.

“You’re going to have to face your emotions sooner or later.” You muttered.

Loki stalked over to you, grasping you by the throat and hoisting you into the air. You gasped for breath, scrabbling to claw at his hand. He narrowed his eyes at you, watching you flounder.

Your vision started to fade and you saw the look of recognition in his eyes. His grip loosened and you fell to your bed, grabbing at your throat as you gasped for air.

Loki turned away, bent double and rubbed his throat. “You fragile human.” He gasped, massaging his neck.

“I’d apologize,” you growled back, “but you did it to yourself.”

Loki straightened up, but the fight seemed to have left him. He ignored you and went back to his bed, still sopping wet.

“Your hair is going to get all knotted if you don’t brush it.” You said softly, almost to yourself.

Loki roared, a burst of magic flowing from him. It pointedly dodged you, but scattered your leftover food on the floor and upended his bed. “Damn them, damn you, damn it all.” He yelled, punching the back wall, again and again.

You could feel the barely contained fury emanating from him, you didn’t even need the link this time.

Thud. Thud. Thud.

Loki’s fist collided with the wall again and again. Pain swam through you and you stood up. “Stop it! You’ll hurt us.”

“There is no us.” Loki snarled again, continuing to punch the wall. Blood spattered from his knuckles and you gripped your hand in pain.

Moving towards him, you put your injured hand on his shoulder and squeezed it. “Please.” You whispered.

Loki leaned his forehead against the wall and you could see or perhaps feel, at this point it was hard to tell, tears ran down his face though he kept his back to you. “This is maddening.” He whispered, tensing at your touch. His voice sounded thick with barely shed tears.

“When’s the last time you were able to just cry and get it all out?”

“Crying is…” You felt the confliction passing through him, he was angry with himself, ashamed, a flood of emotions ran through you and you felt tears well in your own eyes.

“How we get rid of excess pain.” You finished for him, wrapping your arms around his waist and resting your head against his back.

This startled Loki and he stiffened at your touch, straightening from the wall. “What was that?” he hissed softly, cradling his injured hand.

You pulled away, looking up at him. “You know it goes both ways.”

Loki shut his eyes and shook his head. “Stop it.” His voice sounded strained.

“You know I’m not doing any of this on purpose.”

“Then shut up.” Loki snarled again, making his way back to his bed. Green magic shimmered around him and he was dry and in fresh clothes. He sat down, bowing his head and studied his hand, carefully flexing the fingers as he took in the damage.

You rolled your eyes.

“I can still feel you.” Loki grumbled. “Judging, silently.”

“What do you want me to do?” you asked exasperated. “You’re just going to have to make the best out of what you’ve been dealt.”

“And how do I do that?” Loki glared at you.

“You could try talking about it maybe, get it out. I’m not really a therapist or anything but…” you trailed off. The unspoken words from Loki floated through you: ‘if he speaks of it, it will be real, there will be no hiding from it.’

Loki shut his eyes again, bowing his head defeated.

You tore off a strip of your skirt and moved to his bed. Carefully, you took his hand in yours, blowing on the bloodied knuckles. With as much care as you could muster, trying to keep your thoughts blank, you wrapped his hand.

Loki watched you quizzically but didn’t speak.

“I’m not trying to make this worse on you, honest. I know what you’ve been through, well you get the idea. I can feel some of it. I don’t know what you’re doing to hide the worst of it but I am grateful for that.”

“I’m hiding it from myself.” Loki admitted, his voice hollow.

You nodded, eyes glancing up to meet his, before turning your attention back to his hand in both of yours.

The two of you sat in silence, and you finally released his hand from yours, letting it hang limply in his lap. Your cheeks heated up, realizing that you had been holding his hand.

Loki looked away.

“Do you see a hairbrush anywhere?” You asked, trying to change the subject.

There was one sitting on the half wall, appearing as though by well magic. Probably magic, you thought lamely. You moved to grab it and began brushing your own hair, it was still damp. Doing everything you could to keep your mind blank, you focused on brushing your hair.

Brush. Brush. Brush.

“The bond seems stronger here.” You commented idly, still doing everything you could to focus on your own strands of hair. If you felt nothing, if you thought nothing, perhaps there would be some peace.

Loki glanced at the ceiling. “Yes, I suppose you’re right. It wasn’t this difficult on Midgard.”

You nodded and pondered his words for a moment. “Wonder if the isolation is making it worse.”

Loki chuckled dryly. “I wouldn’t be too surprised by that either. Though I’ve had far more isolating times in my life.” He was still looking at the ceiling as he spoke.

You could see glimpses of his childhood as you fixedly brushed your hair. Trying to push the mental images away seemed to make them stronger in your head so you stopped fighting. “It feels like powerful magic.”

“Odin is no stranger to power.” Loki muttered.

You nodded, “he took away Thor’s powers, right?”

Loki didn’t answer but his silence spoke volumes.

“Why didn’t he just take away your abilities like that?”

“My ability to lie? It seems he has.” Loki muttered.

You were about to respond but stopped, thinking of how each emotion he felt spread to you. “Huh… I guess you’re right.”

“And now I am to wile away eternity here, my lifetime, until eventually you die, and I am left with a shell of a companion. Left to go mad in isolation.”

“Do you think if I die of old age, it’ll kill you too? Violent death seems off the table given what happens.”

Loki nodded, hanging his head dejectedly. “So perhaps my suffering won’t be quite as long.”

Alarms blared through the air and you twisted in your seat to look out. Prisoners were fleeing their cells, guards rushing in to meet them, and one prisoner stood a head and shoulders’ taller than the rest of them.

Loki rose from his bed and moved nearer the outer wall.

The massive prisoner, horns jutting out from its helmet, approached your cage. It eyed Loki evenly and for Loki’s part, he simply glared back. Traces of a smile threatened to spread on his face but you felt his heart thundering from within.

The beast waved its hand dismissively, backing away and turning back to the rest of the commotion.

“You might want to take the stairs to your left.” Loki murmured.

“Where does that lead?” You breathed when the beast had left your sight. The rest of the prisoners were being subdued, only your cage remained intact.

“Weapon’s vault.” Loki muttered, sinking back onto the bed.

You looked around. “Asgard is being invaded, and you told him where the weapons are?”

“You think I care? What of it, and do you think the beast even believed me?”

You frowned thoughtfully, trying to ignore the sounds of fighting outside the cage. “So we just sit here then?”

“Do you intend to break out as well?” Loki asked.

“Maybe it’s time for another nap.” You muttered though you didn’t feel tired.

You lay on your bed on your back, gazing up at the ceiling. After a moment, Loki returned from his vantage point at the front of the cell and sank into his own bed.

Time passed, a lot of time really, and the other prisoners were finally rounded up. More time passed.

A single guard approached your cell, bowing his head before speaking. “The queen mother is dead.”

Loki blinked, too stunned to react. He stiffly nodded his head and the guard left.

You looked at him, feeling your world shattering around you from the bond.

Loki screamed. You felt magical energy boiling from within him and you ran to his side, hugging him as tight as you could.

This startled him, pulling him from his grief as he allowed you to hold him.

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Reading The Way of Kings is really funny so far because you go from reading about Kaladin and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day(s) to Shallan and her sailor buddy Yalb's wacky book-buying adventure back to Kaladin about to fucking kill himself.

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Ahhhhh I love them so much

Thrown - Chapter 3: Fighting Words

Summary: Despite his best efforts, Loki gets dragged to dinner with you and Thor. You manage to get a rise out of him during the meal.

Word Count: 2,771

Author’s Notes: Thanks to everyone reblogging/commenting. It's nice to know a few people are enjoying the story.

Masterlist

Loki had managed to dodge Thor's errands for more than a week, at least those that took him out of New Asgard. He was going to be dragged out to that wretched human town again today, he could feel it in his bones. It was late morning and he hadn't yet left his bedroom, hoping his brother might forget he existed. No such luck, there was a knock at the door.

"Loki-" "You want me to accompany you somewhere." "I'm just dropping off some papers in town. I'd enjoy your company for the walk. You don't have to." Loki thought for a moment. Dropping something off should be quick, with little interaction. If he went with Thor on this simple mission he may be able to avoid another, more taxing errand in the future. "Alright, I'll go."

They were soon walking down the streets of New Asgard. Loki still received the occasional wary look but most of the Æsir had acclimated to his presence. All of those in New Asgard were aware of how their prince had sacrificed himself for their benefit, some had even witnessed it. And while the world at large hadn't been told about the TVA and the branching realities, the Asgardian people had heard the story of how this new Loki had come to be among them. It had become clear in the time since that two distinct opinions had developed in the community. There were some who believed that this Loki was in fact not their Loki but a Loki from somewhere else, and therefore they did not trust him. Others believed instead that this was actually their Loki, and rather than sacrifice himself he had again faked his death on the ship, and therefore they did not trust him. The end result being that everyone generally didn't quite trust Loki, which had more or less always been the case. This made it quite easy to settle into their new relationship with the prince, as it was essentially the same one they'd had before.

The brothers made their way up the road, making amicable conversation. The cottage in the bend in the road came into view. Loki made his prayers, and so far they held out; you weren't anywhere to be seen. As they drew closer his luck ran out. You were walking between the cottage and the building adjacent, the black dog at your heels. You spotted them and waved. "Boys! Good morning!" Thor was already stopping to visit, Loki begrudgingly did the same. "Good morning!" Thor must have been making stops here in the days past, because the dog happily trotted up to him and he knelt to pet it at eye level. "And good morning to you, Ash." He looked back to you. "How are you today?" You smiled and shrugged. "Oh you know, just working."

Loki now noticed that you. were. filthy. Your hands, your arms nearly to your elbows were covered in dirt. Or, he supposed, clay. It was on your clothes, your hair, even a smudge or two on your face. "And yourself? Heading for town?" Thor stood up from his position doting on the dog. "Just a quick trip today. There and back again." The dog approached Loki, sniffing inquisitively. Loki did not move a muscle. After a moment Ash seemed satisfied and returned to your side. Loki was still holding his breath, waiting for the opportunity to move on. You brushed some dried clay off of your shirt. "I'm cooking a roast tonight. You two should come by."

And that was it. Their fates were now sealed. What did Loki do to offend the Norns today?

Thor appeared to ponder the proposal but it was surely just an act. "It seems unfair, you've served us once already and we've yet to return the kindness." "Oh, don't make me twist your arm. If you don't come over I'll have to freeze half of it anyway." "Well I suppose if that's the case then we would be doing you a disservice to decline. Wouldn't you say, Loki?" Loki's face was stone. "Yes, I suppose so." You beamed. "Perfect. I'll see you tonight." You gave a wave and went on your way, disappearing into the next building, Ash followed suit.

The brothers were back on their trek. Loki was brooding with the loudest silence he could muster. Thor gave him a playful elbow. "Oh come on, Loki. I'm sure you're tired of the food at home." "I'm tired of the company here." Thor laughed. "You make this so much worse on yourself. Sometimes I think you're trying to be miserable." "I'm not going." "Don't tell me that Loki, the fearsome God of Mischief, is intimidated by a mere mortal." "You know that isn't the case." Thor raised his eyebrows and shrugged. "That's how it seems from here. Loki, Prince of Asgard, cowed by the thought of dinner with a human." Loki knew what he was doing, which made the fact that it was working all the more annoying. Thor could see the cracks forming. "You could consider it a challenge." Loki sighed. There wasn't going to be a way out of this, anyhow. "I suppose I can't let her win." Thor chuckled. "Yes, she is quite the formidable adversary. You shouldn't give her any ground."

The rest of the trip into town was uneventful. Thor dropped off his papers, and since there was now a dinner on the agenda he picked up a couple bottles of wine as well. They meandered through the streets for a bit before finding their way back onto the road to New Asgard. They rounded the yew tree at the corner, the sign that they were halfway home. The building you had entered earlier had the door propped open. Looking at it now, Loki realized it had likely been another cottage, originally. It seemed to have the same general construction as your home. As they passed Loki risked a glance in the window. He could see you bent over a pottery wheel, focused. You didn't take notice of the brothers on their way by.

**

It was evening. Loki had spent the afternoon wallowing in his dread and now he was standing on your front porch while Thor knocked on the door. He had decided against an absolute vow of silence, in the end that had felt like playing into your hand. Still, he was determined not to be good company. Whatever it took to discourage you from including him in future dinners, short of being directly unkind. Thor would take issue with that.

You opened the door with a smile. "Come on in, boys. Just finishing setting up." As they crossed the threshold Thor raised the wine bottles in his hand. "I've brought an offering." "Oh thanks! You didn't have to do that." You took a bottle and bustled off to the kitchen, with the "boys" trailing behind. The table was already set. Again, none of the dishes matched. The roast was at the table, already carved. There were bowls of side dishes as well. You were on your tiptoes reaching into a cabinet, after a moment you finally came away with three wine glasses. "There we go. I don't pull these out very often but I'm not about to serve a couple of gods wine in a mug." Loki was mildly surprised that you owned any sort of vessel that wasn't made of clay.

Thor and Loki took their seats while you were tracking down a corkscrew. The dog had been pacing the room, circling the table. As you took your seat you waved your hand at him. "Ash, go lay down." He gave you a reproachful look but went to his cushion against the wall and flopped down. "He loves roast." You offered as an explanation.

The food was certainly better than what they would have had at home. Thor and Loki could cook well enough to survive but it was a skill they had never had much need to develop. You and Thor made easy conversation, Loki occasionally nodded or gave short replies when prompted but had largely been successful in avoiding interaction.

"Loki, Thor tells me that you're an avid reader. Have you been to the library in town yet?" Loki scoffed. "There isn't any Midgardian literature that's worth the time." Thor shook his head and spoke between bites. "No, I remember there being a human author you were fond of. The poet. What was his name?" He chewed thoughtfully, then snapped his fingers. "Shakespeare! His books were in our library." Loki gave a small nod of concession. "Well, yes, I suppose compared to the drivel the rest of humanity-" "Eh, I never really got the appeal." You shrugged and took a sip of wine. Loki was startled by your interruption. "Pardon?" "Shakespeare. Not that great. Overrated, really." Loki paused, then gave a short laugh of disbelief. "Overrated? He's the most significant writer your people have seen." "What's so special about him? His most famous work is basically a teenage drama." This was one of the most absurd statements Loki had ever heard. "Clearly you didn't understand the point." You looked unimpressed. "Maybe you're just reading too much into it. Kinda pretentious." The insult brought him over the line. He couldn't bear the arrogance. "It would seem Midgardian education is even more lacking than I previously thought." "You're not making a great case for Asgardian education, I'd say."

That was it, he had to show you that you were wrong. Spurred forward, he began making the case for Shakespeare being significant and foundational, in return you consistently countered with arguments that he was derivative or absurd. He'd give examples and you had just as many to parry with. This continued for nearly ten minutes, culminating in you positing that there actually was no ghost at all in Hamlet, that it's really just a story of a man gone insane. Loki was opening his mouth to respond when he froze. He came to a sudden realization: you could only make these ridiculous arguments if you were intimately familiar with Shakespeare's works. You were doing this on purpose. You had tricked him into a conversation. He watched your face, your expression shifted as you recognized he had caught on. You opened your hands resting on the table, palms up, and gave a small half-smile, it had an apologetic air. Loki looked at Thor, who hadn't spoken a word in quite some time. He was wearing an amused grin, he must have picked up on it as well. Loki glowered and drained his wine glass.

You did him the courtesy of changing the subject. "I understand you have a talent with magic." "Hm. Yes. A talent." Loki was refilling his glass. Thor rejoined the conversation. "I've never seen a greater master of seiðr." He sounded genuinely proud. "Except, perhaps, our mother." "What sort of magic do you do?" He could hear in your voice that you were trying to rein in your enthusiasm for the topic. He offered a vague wave of disinterest. "Illusion, mostly." "I'd love to see that." "I don't perform tricks on command." You nodded. "Fair enough."

It was all you were going to get out of the dark-haired god, but you seemed satisfied. You turned back to Thor with something you remembered from a previous conversation, Loki finished his meal in relative peace. When it became clear that everyone had eaten their fill, you stood up and picked up the wine, at some point the second bottle had been opened. "Let's go sit in the living room, finish this off where it's more comfortable." You picked up your glass and made your way to one of the plush armchairs as you poured yourself a refill. To Loki's annoyance Thor followed suit, taking a place on the couch. Loki joined him, and when you set the wine bottle on the coffee table he picked it up to top off his glass. He was determined to empty this bottle as soon as possible.

Thor lifted a picture frame from the end table. It was a photo of you and an old woman. Loki was terrible at guessing human ages. He recognized the chairs you were sitting in as the same ones currently on the front porch. The two of you were laughing, eyes nearly completely closed, grasping at each other's arms as if you both had to brace against the other to stay upright. Thor turned the photo to you. "Is this Gerdy?" You gave a warm smile as you looked at the picture. "That's her. That's my favorite picture of us." Thor looked down at the photo again. "She was very dear to you." "Oh yes, very much." An edge of sadness had crept into your voice, but just barely. "She was everything. She gave me a home. She gave me art. A means of living. Everything I have I owe to her. She's the sole reason I'm even here." "Ah, then we owe her a debt as well." Thor set the photo down and raised his glass. "To Gerdy, for blessing us with the opportunity to meet." You smiled and lifted your glass, Loki thought he saw a trace of tears brimming in your eyes. He raised his glass as well and the three of you drank to Gerdy's spirit.

The conversation turned to New Asgard and some hall Thor was hoping to build. The social reprieve allowed Loki to focus on eliminating as much wine as possible, sometimes even refilling Thor's glass for him. Finally, the bottle was empty and he could feel the evening coming to a close. Thor was standing to leave when there was a ringing chime, the source of which turned out to be Thor's phone. Midgard technology he had adopted. He'd tried to convince Loki to get one as well but he wouldn't have it. Thor pulled out the device and frowned at the screen. "I'm afraid I should take this." He turned to you. "My lady, thank you for a wonderful evening." You smiled and to Loki's dismay you reached up to hug the god. "Any time, it was a pleasure." Thor stepped out the front door to answer the call. Loki gave you a nod and turned to follow. "Loki, wait." He stopped and looked at you sidelong. He was absolutely not going to hug you. You held up a finger. "Wait there just a second." You disappeared into the bedroom, and returned a moment later with a book. "You can borrow this, if you like. Just until you have a chance to build back your own library."

Loki looked down at the book you had pushed into his hands. The Collected Works of William Shakespeare. He ran a thumb over the embossed letters of the cover and looked back up at you. You seemed to be holding your breath, you looked almost nervous as you waited for his response. It was the first time he'd seen you as anything other than politely confident. He looked down at the book again and thought for a moment, then he met your eyes and held the book aloft in one hand. It vanished with a flash of green light. Your face was an image of earnest delight, fading to a warm smile. "Thank you," you said quietly, then added with a wink, "I won't tell Thor." Loki gave a grateful nod. "Thank you." Then stepped out the door into the night.

Thor was finishing his call as Loki approached. Loki gestured to the phone as Thor put it away. "All's well?" "Yes, another shipment of supplies is on the way." The brothers began their trek toward New Asgard. Thor turned to Loki. "Who won the battle tonight?" "I've decided to declare it a draw." Thor chuckled and they continued their walk in relative silence, occasionally commenting on the hills or the stars or the sea in the distance.

Loki's mind wandered back to the book you had given him. Perhaps he should have declined it, he was trying to discourage interaction, after all. Part of him made the argument that he had taken the book because he wanted it. Why not accept something that was useful to him? After he had prepared for bed he sat in his room with the book in his hands. His eyes ran over the pages and it was something of a comfort. Familiar words in an unfamiliar world. That's why he had taken it, he told himself.

Another voice in his mind said that wasn't the entire truth.

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[leafyshell]

I’m so obsessed with this fic <3

Little Gifts (Part Eight)

Unable to deal with just how strong your feelings for him are, you make some bad decisions when it comes to Loki.

Pairing: Loki x audhd!reader

Word count: 3004

A/N: In my head this was way cuter and less of an angsty mess. I also didn't edit as thoroughly as I normally do (which is already bare minimum) so I apologize if something is off or out of place. I'll fix things when I can.💚

Divider credit @/saradika

Previous | Masterlist

Ever since that downright embarrassing restaurant incident, you've been trying to avoid Loki. The event had been too intimate for your liking. Or rather, you liked how intimate it was too much. Loki proved just how well he knows you, and even worse, you felt completely safe crashing and burning right in front of him.

The new burst of feelings after that night had been so terribly euphoric that it was frightening, so you devised a scheme to try to stay away from him.

Though, 'trying' is a bit of a stretch. It would be near impossible to avoid someone you technically live with, especially with somewhat-scheduled meals and mandatory activities. It would only draw attention to your 'avoid Loki at all costs' plan if you walked out of training or skipped most of your meals.

Instead, you opt for burying yourself in endless tasks that take you as far away from him as possible. None of them are useful—or necessary—and you feel like you're wasting your and everyone else's time. It was hard to focus on anything that you normally did. Even walking felt dangerous when you lost track of your feet a few too many times, having to catch yourself before plummeting ungracefully to the ground.

Everyone notices, because of course they do. Even people you consider to be mere acquaintances notice, stopping you in the halls to ask if you're okay.

Of course I'm not!

You dismiss them every time, forcing yourself to smile in an almost convincing way, hoping that you scrunch your cheeks just enough to make it look like your smile reaches your eyes, mimicking others' expressions. It seems to fool enough of them, because after a couple of weeks, people stop asking if you were okay.

The real downside to avoiding Loki, though, is avoiding Loki. You didn't realize how much you've come to rely on him for emotional support and regulation and pretty much every other good thing. You didn't get it until you couldn't plop yourself down in front of him and start rambling about any and all thoughts that had crossed your mind since the last time you saw him. Your crush is way more serious than you thought, but putting effort into processing exactly what you feel is the mental equivalent of trying to put cubes in triangular holes.

There was one thing, specifically, that he did that you greatly appreciated and sorely missed. His uncanny ability to know exactly what you need to hear and feel. He didn't tell you your anxieties were false or lies, like others did and how you had trained yourself to respond. Though he'd occasionally tell you how flawed your reasoning is, he wouldn't just outright dismiss your feelings in the moment.

"I feel like everyone's judging my outfit."

Normally, people will respond with, "No one is judging you," which is false, or, "you look fine," which is not what you asked. Both only serve to make you feel worse, like they don't care much that your worries often defy sound reasoning. But, Loki can make you laugh, a sound that still surprises you every time as it bursts free without warning.

"Perhaps. If they voice their disgust, I'll toss them in the stockade."

"We don't have those anymore, Loki."

"And? I have a few in storage, darling. We can procure rotten vegetables, as well, if it'd please you."

You miss it. Him. It sucks knowing that you're only doing this because you were too vulnerable that night, too dependent and childish and—

Stop stop stop! 

He can't know how much you need him, he just can't. You can't let it happen. Open communication might work for the rest of the population, but telling other people what they mean to you, or how you feel in general, always ends in tragedy.

Not that it matters much, anyway. You figure, with Loki's recent moods, it might not be a good time to tell him anything at all.

Since around the time you started avoiding him, he switches between being curt and sour, and then completely distant. It's almost like he's regressed back to where he was when he first moved in. He was prickly that first day, reacting to every little thing as if it was hand-selected to bother him. But after that first night, it's like he woke up and realized he'd been completely defeated, because that's how he appeared. It doesn't seem that far off of an assumption, given he was basically transferred from one prison to another. It made sense to you that he'd crumble inwards. Still, it was scary how Loki was almost a ghost for those first few days. It worried you back then.

Now, he'll do as instructed. Nothing more, nothing less. 

Recently, Loki even taught you how to throw a couple types of Asgardian throwing knives during your mandatory training sessions, though he made it seem like such a chore.

"Why is it all squiggly? This seems ornamental to me, Loki. Am I really supposed to just throw it? I don't want to scuff it up, though—"

"Just throw it. Hold it the way I showed you. No, no—do it right or simply cease."

The only expression he has these days is scrunched brows. No, not the worried kind or the sad furrowed brows, or the ones that make him look very handsome or pretty, but the angry one. At least, that's what you think it is. It definitely isn't the worried or the sad, and you struggle to piece it together with all the context you're given, which is very little. It can only be anger, right? What other feelings could there possibly be?

Besides, it looks close enough to the expression most of everyone in the compound has at some point during the day. Tension. It spreads like it's contagious whenever something big is going down.

Except, nothing big is going down, at least not something that you notice. It wasn't like you were paying much attention, either.

So, you figure you'll stay away from him for a while longer. Just to be safe.

He needs his space, right? Well, that's what you would want if you were angry.

After two weeks, you reach a point where you realize you might either explode or implode. Without any of your usual methods of self-regulation, which by now had simply become Loki, it seems like you somehow might manage to do both at once, if it were possible.

To avoid further embarrassment, since you're positive at least one other person noticed what happened at that party aside from Loki, you lock yourself in your room for the day.

It feels awful. Your body has gotten used to activity, and now it aches fiercely, protesting your idleness by making everything hurt to the point where you couldn't move, anyway. Your mind fares no better, your thoughts jumping from topic to topic so quickly that you can't even finish a thought before the next one butts in. You can't focus on books, or music, or shows. Not even the basic comfort of caring for your plants can save you, since you start watering your biggest one and you feel too lethargic to lift it back into place once the soil was sodden, leaving the giant leaf monster in the middle of the room.

Ugh. UGH! Who cares! Who cares! They'll all die anyway, right? Just a waste! Of everything! I shouldn't bother anymore, shouldn't even try because what's the point!?

Now, you know that your thoughts can't actually increase in volume, since they have no real volume at all, but even thinking such things hurts your ears. It's an immense struggle to rein it back in, to remind yourself of everything you should do should there be a meltdown.

Just go to bed.

Go. To. Bed.

So that's exactly what you do. Unable to feel anything touching your skin without bursting into tears, you strip yourself and most of your bedding, keeping only what you need to sleep. Just the sheets, a very thin blanket, a singular pillow plucked from the mountain of cushions you own, and of course, the prized stuffie.

You fall asleep as soon as you get comfortable. Your brain is simply too fried to even worry anymore.

Unfortunately, you wake up sweaty and gross and far more tired than when you fell asleep. You're too warm and too cold and the sheets that you got specifically for their smoothness were just too itchy.

Feeling something fuzzy against your nose when you roll over, you open your eyes to see the little black horse plushie, its solitary eye reflecting what little light there is.

That's weird. I didn't put you there.

You sit up and hold it, looking around your bed and then around your room like doing so might just tell you what happened.

Subconsciously, you rub your face in its mane, trying to regain your bearings. Then, you realize it smells a bit off. Not off in a bad way, just not what it's supposed to smell like. It's very nice actually, very familiar and addictive. It takes a moment for your sleep-addled brain to figure it out.

Loki. Why do you smell like Loki?

You twist the horse in your hands, remembering that Loki only had it for a few hours at most before giving it back all those weeks ago.

Did I accidentally wash it with my blankets? Did I use someone else's detergent?

You try to rationalize why it smells like Loki, and why the longer you hold it, the more your nerves calm down without completely shutting down.

There's no use in rationalizing anything about Loki. In spite of Loki's clear intelligence and wit, he's anything but rational. He's weird and confounding.

So, as much as you try to believe this is an error you made, a mistake that is completely plausible and yet you can't remember a situation where it could have actually happened, you're left with one answer.

Loki did something to the plushie, similar to the magic he used that night at the restaurant. Whether he came into your room to place it beside you or he just snapped his fingers and it was there, it didn't really matter.

Because, it seems, as much as you try to pretend that you don't feel anything for him, and as much as you ignore him out of shame, he just knows.

It's terrifying.

As it turns out, the general weirdness you've been feeling from almost everyone is actually something big, and not just something that was leeching off of you like a cloud of miasma.

The full Avengers team—and now Loki, you guess—have completely prepared for a mission without you even knowing. You didn't find out until you passed by one of the conference rooms and saw all of them sitting there for what looked like their last briefing. You tried putting in your keycode into the door, but it didn't open. You weren't cleared for the mission.

A few hours after the meeting, you corner Tony near one of the lab rooms.

You cross your arms, unable to mask just how ridiculously hurt you feel, "What gives?"

"Excuse me?"

"You know what I'm talking about. The mission."

He sighs and rubs his face before replying, "Look, kid—"

"I know I'm not on everyone else's level, okay? I thought I was doing well on missions. I'm not part of the 'super club', but I thought I had the clearance to know things. And Loki? Why is he going? He's not even allowed to exercise without supervision, so how does he suddenly have clearance above mine?"

"It's his mission, okay?"

You deflate a bit. "...What?"

"Listen," he holds up a finger, "and don't interrupt. We all elected to not give you clearance." You open your mouth to yell a what?! but he keeps going, "You've been acting weird for a while now. We've all noticed, and have agreed it isn't safe."

"That's not fa—"

"This isn't about your capabilities or your limitations. You're not yourself, and it's too risky."

The white-hot anger has ebbed away into something that feels a bit more suffocating. You should be used to being left out of things, but it still manages to make you feel like you're drowning in hurt. "But isn't there something I'm allowed to do? Can I at least know what's going on?"

He looks away from you, like he doesn't want to see how red your eyes are getting. "Ah—that's a bit more complicated."

"What—"

"If you want answers, you'll have to ask Loki. He's the one who suggested it."

"It? By that do you mean leaving me out of the mission or keeping me completely ignorant?"

"Well, both, now that I think about it, but that's between you two. I'm not a qualified couples therapist."

You ignore that last bit. "I thought we had an understanding. I thought you'd stick up for me."

"And I do. You're an incredible asset, it's just… Well, he brought up excellent points."

"Like?"

"Like how your behavior is abnormal. Your focus is shot. You're struggling to follow simple directions. I know that that's normal for you, on some level, but it has gotten way out of hand."

Ashamedly, you have to admit that he's right. More than what he's already mentioned, you're also being immature. While admitting that hurts, given that everyone has called you childish at least once, you know when you can do better. The shame makes your cheeks flush hot and your palms get sweaty way too quickly.

Ignoring Loki wasn't mature. Avoiding your pressing responsibilities within the compound so you could continue to avoid Loki wasn't mature. Badgering Tony for answers and acting like he's against you is not mature.

Damn. You'll have to apologize. To everyone, it seems, since your behavior has likely affected them all on some level.

You'd like to start with the person who probably needs to hear it the most, but any plans on doing that are cut abruptly.

"We're setting off in less than fifteen minutes. It's too late to brief you, even if I could get you cleared."

Fuck!

Leaving Tony alone and bewildered, you dash as quickly as you can without slipping on the smooth and polished floors back to the living quarters.

Please be there, please be there.

He isn't. Of course he isn't.

You try looking up his location, but you're not granted access.

The door to his room is open, though, and you notice that a black duffel bag is on his bed. It seems like he just finished packing, and he'll likely come back. You could just wait, of course, and talk to him directly before he leaves. But, the thought of actually saying what you feel and admitting that you could have handled all of this much better makes your heart squeeze uncomfortably. You'd need time to think of what to say, and your words would likely scramble up on the way out, fusing five different ways of saying the same thing into one monstrous mess.

I need to fix this. Please let me fix this.

You hurry back to your room and grab a pen to write a scrawled apology. An, "I'm sorry Loki, let's talk after you get back," should suffice. Your pen runs out of ink, though, just as you're halfway through the first word. The next three pens are the same, completely and utterly useless at their singular task.

Seriously!?

Unable to find anything suitable to write a note with, you're left with your go-to method of just giving him something.

He gets it by now, right? He gets that your strange methods of communication actually mean something…right?

Well, it can't just be a random thing that you put in his bag for him to find. It has to at least make sense.

A book?

No. Unless the title is, 'I'm so very sorry for how I acted and I hope you still like me and want me as your friend or maybe something different would be awesome too," it's unlikely it would work.

You open your closet and pull out your shoebox of keychains—yet another one of your odd collections that migrated with you to the compound, along with your plushies.

One of the keychains is a bright green, plush snake. It fits in the palm of your hand, with a little pink ribbon sticking out of its mouth. You think you got it at a zoo, but you can't quite recall. The writing on the tiny tag had worn off ages ago, but you're pretty sure you bought it during your snake phase as a child. Though you're not as fixated on them as you used to be, that phase taught you something special. It taught you to question why certain creatures are labeled as evil and scary when they're just creatures. They're different, and many are dangerous for sure, but so are non-scary creatures like dogs or cats.

When you told Loki that, he looked at you in a way that would have melted you if it were possible.

So, he'll get it, right?

Just to be sure, you grab another keychain. An anatomical heart, also with origins you forgot. You hook them together.

It should make sense. Right?

Relieved that his duffel is still on his bed, you unzip it just a bit to place your gift inside.

You try looking for him once more, unwilling to just wait for him in his bedroom like some creep, but you're unable to find him before you hear the whoosh of the quinjet.

His bag is gone when you pass by for the final time.

There's hope that you haven't completely destroyed your relationship with him, but doubt drowns it out and nauseatingly swirls around inside your belly. With nothing to do but wait, you sit down by the glass windows in the common area, staring at the pristine emerald lawn.

I'm sorry, Loki.

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[leafyshell]

I knew I was really immersed in the stormlight archive when I was reading it in public and got gender dysphoria because I thought people would assume I'm a girl because I'm reading....