likeagrilledcheesesandwich - Tumblr blog

[likeagrilledcheesesandwich]

_I guess this is goodbye

the good_

nothing

and noam jenkin’s voice

(is being able to say ‘it’s not as bad as it could have been’ really a good thing?)

the bad_

wrench, I continue to not being able to stand him

where’s my nuance gone? where’s my plot’s twists and turns? why is everything so hamfisted? why does every character explain every little thing all the time? why is this so badly written? why did ubisoft stop making good games?

somewhere under all the drivel, there might even be a good plotline or two, but, like, they seem to be there by accident rather than intentional

that’s not how nearly fatal injuries work

that’s not how blood loss and comas work

and the ugly_

the roadkill in aiden’s face

the rest of his character “design”

(I could get behind the trousers, though… or something involving the trousers anyway… speaking of which, when I took aiden’s clothes away I made him look cool, clearly this was not the ubisoft way)

I would like to thank the bottle of southern comfort that gave its last to help me through this. in a work week. on a wednesday night. 

[likeagrilledcheesesandwich]

Why I do (not) care (anymore)

At the end of it, it comes down to a three strikes rule: 

Aiden’s ugly beard

Wrench

Assassin’s Creed

Legion’s out. 

I could make some dismissive statement about the plot, but that would require me to work up enough interest to look up what Legion even is about. I fully concede it seems ill-tempered and possibly premature to decide I don’t like something without having tried it. 

Yet, I’d propose that everyone, one way or another, pre-selects what they’ll invest time in and what’s not worth the trouble. Legion, to me, is not worth it.

Because let’s look at the track record here and extrapolate a bit from there. 

Let’s start with Watch Dogs 2. I have no changed my opinion on it. No need to regurgitate. Briefly, it was — and remains — too shrill and shallow for my preference. I don’t believe Legion would ever truly deviate from that clearly successful trajectory. 

But hey, there’s also Assassin’s Creed! Ubisoft has spent more than a decade running it into the ground. Last I gave them the benefit of the doubt they had AltaÏr sit around doing fuck all for fifty or so years, becomes a mediocre village elder who did fuck all important and died for nothing. I know he died for nothing because Ezio did exactly the same. Desmond, too.  

I’ve talked before on why AC and WD being in the same universe irritates me.

I keep telling myself I don’t care. It’s not entirely true. I care that I don’t care. Very much so. But there’s really nothing I can do about that, except to wait for the scar tissue to form.

What is true, however, is that I feel no curiosity about Legion. Sometimes, rarely, there’s a spark there, a desire to see Aiden again, spend time in his shoes and his head, because that was a kickass place to be. 

Then I remember what that might take and I prefer to spare myself the heartbreak. 

[likeagrilledcheesesandwich]

I… just unfollowed the aiden pearce tag. I never thought I’d do that, but… I’m getting annoyed and bitter everytime something comes up on it. better to let it go. 

I wasn’t going to get legion either way. first they uglified aiden, are likely to ruin his character and arc anyway, and now there’s nails-on-chalkboard wrench in it? 

no. 

ubi is techincally doing me a favour by trying to make this a unappealing as possible to me. 

maybe eventually it’ll feel that way. 

[likeagrilledcheesesandwich]

I’m oddly disappointed that this blog hasn’t been blocked by everyone yet.

[likeagrilledcheesesandwich]

Me pointing at AC Black Flag and Watch Dogs: Assassin’s Creed and Watch Dogs are the same universe.

Bitter fake gamer without an ounce of imagination: Ughhhh No… it was just an easter egg!!

Me pointing at AC Origins: DID I FUCKING STUTTER???!!!

[likeagrilledcheesesandwich]

obviously, my opinion is just my opinion. for someone who likes both wd and ac, I suppose them inhabiting the same universe is actually good news. I just find it irritating. (and I may have a somewhat thin skin when it comes wd 1. it’s my absolutely favourite game and that can become... tiresome.) 

the funny thing is, I could’ve sworn ubi wouldn’t mention aiden or wd 1 ever again. but then aiden briefly appeared in wd 2 and I thought ‘okay, but that’s gonna be it’. yet, there’s he popping up in ac. so... maybe it’s the devs trolling the first game’s detractors and he’ll just keep turning up like a bad penny. I think I might actually be down for that. 

AIDEN PEARCE IN AC ORIGINS

[likeagrilledcheesesandwich]

because I used to love assassin’s creed, but dislike almost every creative decision the devs made roughly since revelations. I don’t like the assassin/templar dichotomy and I think the magic-y and unscientific aspects of assassin’s creed canon don’t click well with wd 1′s far more chaotic world with its multitude of opportunistic players. therefore I don’t like assassin’s creed and wd being canonically in the same universe. there’s also the problem that forcing aiden to join one ideology-driven group to fight another ideology-driven group diminishes a loner character like him.

I assume you count focus as a kind of eagle vision, but it’s more likely just a representation of how time seemingly slows down during an adrenaline rush. aiden’s also probably just abusing smart drugs, too.

above all else, I’m just deeply wary of any attempts by ubi to retcon anything of the first game, because I suspect it’s to make it more in line with their more mainstream-appeal games like wd 2 and most of ac. 

AIDEN PEARCE IN AC ORIGINS

[likeagrilledcheesesandwich]

aiden should be pixellated.

AIDEN PEARCE IN AC ORIGINS

[likeagrilledcheesesandwich]

#hire me ubisoft i would make aiden pearce actually iconic

how?

An addendum to the GTA with PMC’s idea: The weapons you’re using are all IoT-enabled pieces of shit, so depending on who you’re fighting, certain weapons may be disabled, and others will unlock advanced features, when it’s in the interests of that particular weapon manufacturer that your target be dead or alive. This not only is cyberpunk as hell, it creates a sort of weapon triangle situation where enemies are immune to certain weapon types but vulnerable to others.

[likeagrilledcheesesandwich]

in what universe is hating on aiden “less personality than a smarthphone” pearce an unpopular opinion?

what’s more important, how do I move there?

[x]

[likeagrilledcheesesandwich]

[likeagrilledcheesesandwich]

while it’s obviously just an easter egg (ubi likes to do this, far cry 3 also has abstergo references) the simple answer would be that both abstergo and ubisoft exist in-universe (at the very least in-universe for watch_dogs). assassin’s creed, or an in-universe equivalent, has been shown to exist in both universes. it’s quite possible fictional ubisoft is a subsidiary of abstergo, thereby completely resolving any contradiction. (the real life equivalent of abstergo in this scenario would be ea...)

it’s not a plothole. (and wd 2 is de facto an au, anyway, given how little it has in common with the original.)

WAIT! ,in Watchdogs aiden hunts CEO of abstergo a FICTIONAL company made by Ubisoft. in Watchdogs 2 however THERE is a is an actual ubisoft company and THEREFORE Assassin’s Creed only existed as A GAME heck there is an easter egg where a woman is talking to someone about the upcoming assassin’s creed. The original Watchdogs and Watchdogs 2 are connected even Aiden made a cameo and the return of T-Bone. The problem is: if Ubisoft existed in watchdogs 2 then Abstergo is a fictional company and The Assassin’s Creed series is only a game but in the original watchdogs Abstergo is shown to be a real company in game supported that when you profile olivier the profiler shows that he is the ceo of abstergo entertainment and that he is being targeted by the brotherhood. Either this states deeper meaning or one major plothole that could minor ruin the game both original and sequel

[likeagrilledcheesesandwich]

off the top of my head, I can come up with one character who resembles aiden in any significant way: ray donovan. and even then, they have some important differences. 

because I have a type, some digging into old fandoms might turn up a handful more. 

can you give me a list?

i’m so strangely attracted to generic white boy™ aiden pearce someone help me

[likeagrilledcheesesandwich]

aaaand there’s the we-won’t-let-dumb-players-not-understand-the-plot-ever-again video.

glad that’s over. 

send alcohol!

I’m suffering through human conditions. 

It’s so bad. can there be a crossover dlc in which trevor comes and eats all of them?

[likeagrilledcheesesandwich]

I’m reminded of why I’ve never really liked jordi. too many “funny” one-liners. 

send alcohol!

I’m suffering through human conditions. 

It’s so bad. can there be a crossover dlc in which trevor comes and eats all of them?

[likeagrilledcheesesandwich]

the pizza guy line. so much funny. I die laughing.

send alcohol!

I’m suffering through human conditions. 

It’s so bad. can there be a crossover dlc in which trevor comes and eats all of them?

[likeagrilledcheesesandwich]

blow his head off! blow his head off! blow his head off! blow his head off! 

send alcohol!

I’m suffering through human conditions. 

It’s so bad. can there be a crossover dlc in which trevor comes and eats all of them?