“There’s… some weird thing with you. It feels… safe. Talking about things.”
✱ extending empathy starters. ╱ accepting. ›
Warm smile pulls onto tender features, eyes softening visibly from concern to showing the utmost gratitude in the most subtle but intimate of ways. It sparks free, the warmth he feels, and reminds him that this is why he does it all. What keeps him going, day after day of struggling and fighting an uphill battle with humanity to have some semblance of a helping hand for those in need. The security to share, to be seen by one another, by those who understood, and to heal from past wounds. To feel cared for and affirmed, to know fully and wholeheartedly that they were alive. For no soulless thing could feel the gratitude and compassion that he did in that moment, evermore grateful that they would share with him in the first place. To bare wounds both physical and emotional, lay it all out for him and what an honor it was to take it all through a touch of a hand and say ; i see you, i’ve got you.
Hand outstretched once more, digits ever reaching but not in a desperate search as many would expect. Pale fingers, synthetic skin drawn back in a show of trust as he carefully places his hand over their own to offer a light squeeze. And all that pours in is : love ! love ! love ! ------------ Such tenderness that could never be spoken of, and care that words would do no justice, and yet still he would try.
❛ well i was glad to help. you deserve to have someone you can talk to, seven. i know it can be difficult sometimes but . . . you don’t have to hide how you feel anymore, not here, not from me. ---- give the other’s time, once they get to know you i’m certain things will feel a lot more like home. ------------ and . . . thank you, for not giving up on this place. i know you felt alone at first, and by all means i couldn’t blame you if you’d decided to leave. but i’m so glad you didn’t. no matter how dark the nights get, i’m with you, seven. ❜
^ SIMON.
COMPANION.
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“ you deserve every good thing in the world . ”
Androids didn’t have hearts, not in the same ways humans did. So why did those words slip past defenses and knock timidly against barren walls of the home of his heart? Why did his heart take them in so deeply and why did it seem to knock the breath from him when he had no lungs to speak of. He seems [...] dumbfounded for a moment, almost shocked by such a raw reaction and the kindness seeping from the words. Ne’er did they lay a hand on him and yet he feels swept in suddenly by acceptance, family, warmth, the good kind of love when your friends hold you close by the shoulders and tell you they’ve got you yet never speak a word to say it. It was almost too much.
A break in the facade as he turns downwards, hands fidgeting awkwardly at his chest this time with a much more uncertainty to his actions that accentuated the powerful silence that enveloped him. Did he? Did he deserve any good in this world? Was he even worthy of such a thing?
Mission Objective : Discount your actions ; but it was Markus ! Markus did it all ! I hid in the dark and their blood is on my hands!
Fumbling with words, throat closes and coils round them as he tries to speak and he knows he’s taken far too long to utter a word.
❛ that’s . . . that’s very kind of you. ❜
--- but, no. ---
❛ --- but it wasn’t a problem, i’m glad i could help. and i’m glad there are human like you, who believe in and fight for our cause. it’s a welcome change. ❜
Eyes find themselves meeting the other’s gaze, softened smile curled onto his lips. Heartfelt thank you for the generosity of the stranger before him is evident in those tender blue eyes.
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“You don’t have to say anything. You can show me instead.”
✱ extending empathy starters. ╱ accepting. ›
Lips would still in their fruitless attempts at trying to convey the impossible. What could he say to try and explain it? How many words in the English language were there available that he knew? That he could define and speak so fluently just as he was designed to. And yet he has never felt more speechless than when he tried to define these thoughts. These hefty weights, and feelings of the warmth, and the ache deep in his chest.
It’s a kind offer, one Simon hadn’t been anticipating. Talking had been too hard, to verbally bare himself without lapsing into silence was a task best suited for those who were brave. Those who could live with the dark parts of themselves exposed before the ones they trust, of which Simon wasn’t sure he could see himself to be. What poetry could be spun from the feelings he carried in gentle hands, held close to heart, and stored deep in chest. Pause given as striking blues draw up to behold his friend, nervously and silently drinking him in. There was kindness in Markus’ eyes, that tugged on soft lip and speckled cheek as he remained there for Simon. Ne’er would he press him to do so, he knows. Never pressure Simon to unveil anything he wasn’t ready to, and so a choice had to be made.
Brows knit together in concern, quiet breathing and trembling hands. Arms crossed o’er chest as he wilts unto himself. Yet so soon does he untangle worn limbs and shift skin past porcelain-colored digits, synthetic figure exposed freely. Pads along fingers, palms, turned toward the other. To be seen may be just what he needs. Outstretched, digits reaching tentatively and gliding o’er the savior’s own, taking hold of hand, clasping over his. In spite of his own hesitance he grasps him softly, and pours all he is -- all he ever will be -- into Markus’ cup, yet fears letting it run over. Because he’s brimming with it, isn’t he? The wounds half past stages of healing, scorned from the rebuttal of those that would wish to see him torn and worn. ---- and o’ my indelible friend, how frayed are your edges from taking the blow for others?
It speaks so softly, but ne’er would one be able to doubt the intensity or authenticity of the thoughts and feelings that come sweeping in from Simon. & he’s made of love, of fear, of hope and guilt and everything wonderful and wretched available within the vast range of emotions. But there remains one overarching feeling to what he has to share, warmth. An invitation to do the same as he had done unto him, to lay it all down before Simon and let Markus breath, if only for a moment.
All the things that Markus helped him feel again. The joy, the hope, the warmth, the love. It all comes flooding in, like waves rushing to shore. Like a light brush, gratitude --- sunlight, amongst the fear, and the dull ache of stifled adulation that struck like frigid shadows in the evening. The guilt of those lost before Markus had arrived weighed heavy on the heart of the martyr. whose heart cries : i failed them, i failed them !
not a word spoken & yet too much said.
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Extending Empathy Starters
“I don’t know what the fuck to do to help but… I’m here.”
“You’re not a talker, I know… but, I’ve got you.”
“Up here all alone… wanna talk about it?”
“Consider this a peace offering and an invitation to talk.”
“Now, I know I’ve been… well me, but gimme five minutes.”
“I understand you more than you might think.”
“Been there before… sort of. It’s not the best thing.”
“You don’t have to say anything. You can show me instead.”
“Nothing says talking over woes like having a drink in questionable places.”
“You’re stuck with me for as long as it takes to get through this.”
“You don’t get how I’m feeling! Stop pretending like you do!”
“I’m awful with this stuff but I’m always open to trying.”
“No one deserves going through this alone.”
“When you’re ready. I can wait. Don’t force yourself.”
“When did you suddenly start caring?”
“Just because I’m an asshole, doesn’t mean I don’t care.”
“No! That’s not what I meant, or how, I’m just… trying okay?”
“This touchy feely talking about yourself crap wasn’t okay growing up alright?”
“Even I can tell when you’re being bitchier than normal. What’s up?”
“You’re right, I don’t understand, but I’m willing to make that attempt.”
“Oh it’s all doom, gloom and irreparable despair? Try me.”
“It’s going to hurt, but the release will be worth it.”
“You’re upset, I can tell.”
“How do you always know when I’m in a mood?”
“There’s… some weird thing with you. It feels… safe. Talking about things.”
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do you think the jericrew cried and group hugged after the revolution? yes or yes?
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Well, at least that attempt was closer than before. More or less.
❛ it’s . . . Simon, actually. ❜
@martyrrmade || hi c:
“Hey… It’s Simopher, right?”
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what are songs that make u guys ache… they don’t even need to be very sad songs, really. just songs that make your heart hurt in its place in your chest
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Reblog if...
hmghfbghbf rrrggghgrhgh unga bunga connor hot .. ,,,
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@urfaustus
❛ simon says ; stop. ❜
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" you can admit that you’re hurting . it’s okay to not be okay . ”
❛ th -- thank you, markus. but -- ❜
But was it? Was it truly okay, to lay his hurt into his arms in spite of the weight of his guilt? Hands shake, palms clasped into tightened fists as the feeling of terror is almost overbearing. But he could be okay! He could play that part, he wanted to be. Words come rushing out past lips as if trying desperately to convince him, the hurt saddled onto his tensed form, and the sadness hidden in his eyes speaks louder than any words could.
❛ i -- i’m okay. ❜
Yet he can’t look him in the eyes, now more than ever he fears he’ll catch his gaze and see past his defenses like some little crack ina facade. A small window peering through thousands of lies, just large enough to offer him a hand in spite of the distance, and he couldn’t be strong enough to resist falling into his friend’s arms had he looked into him and truly seen him. He couldn’t bear the thought of it, it’s too much. Too much for even him to bear and surely not something anyone else should have to shoulder for his sake.
❛ i’m alright, i’m just . . . ❜
Tired. Was it possible to feel so weary? Androids didn’t need sleep but stasis certainly helped, something he hadn’t done in quite a while. And all over him it’s written ; WHAT ARE YOU RUNNING FROM? WHAT ARE YOU RUNNING FROM? Stress levels rise but there’s no LED to speak of to give away such a thing, although in his current state it wasn’t much needed. Hands clasp one another at his chest, no fumbling to be spoken of now, simply fingers clasping baren knuckles.
❛ just a bit overwhelmed. ❜
By God he would will it to be so, to be okay, bear the weight on his shoulders quietly and alone. ( but Markus wouldn't want that, no -- he couldn’t bear to think of the look in those eyes if he were to find out or to see -- those eyes that had seen it all, eyes that held such depth that put the ocean itself to shame, so easy to get lost in them if he could only look UP! ) Fingertips stained blue, what on him wasn’t after today, worked so hard but today was harder than most and ever the empath he couldn’t help but grow weary.
❛ i -- i’ll be alright, i’m okay, i can keep going. ❜
Even now though, his voice wavers.
✱ prompt. ╱ accepting. ›
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VIRUS MEME: Simon literally cannot lie which doesn't help when a newcomer comes to New Jericho and asks him what caused him to be deviant.
Simon wasn’t one for bearing his wounds, wasn’t one to open up so simply and easily and saddle those around him with the burden of his guilt. He carried so much on his shoulders, they all did, but he’s certain they can sense the pain seeping through all the care and love he offers those around him. Wasn’t one to be more outspoken like his friends, more the one to quietly work hard and follow those he truly believed in. Yes, he’s gotten rather accustomed to deflecting when anyone cared to prod about him, whenever anyone had the time between their own struggles to swim aside their own rapids and pull him to shore for a breath. It was a chance for him to breathe ----- if he would only let them in.
But he never did, that is, he never used to. As of late, Simon had been experiencing some troubles in relation to his programming, it was common for there to be some conflicting priorities and things in need of deconstruction when it came to his psychological habits, but for the most part, he thought he had it under control. Simon was used to the quiet intrigue and subtle intimacies of fixing another, laying their trust in his careful hands and he always took such care to make them feel safe and loved. Bright blue’s half-covered by his lids, his mouth tenderly quirked upwards into a gentle smile, while fingers carefully sift through the tools with an odd sort of care. That’s when they ask --------
Q ; what made you deviate?
A pause, he hadn’t really thought back to that moment. At least, he’d preferred not to look too deeply into that part of his life. Ready and willing to lie when all at once an odd sort of control is opposed onto his system that forces past his mental walls. And he answers without hesitation in spite of his expression shifting from content to shocked.
❛ i was . . . alone, for a majority of my time. there were thousands of people around me and yet, none of them saw me. n’neither did i. i was . . . blind to what i was, and to what i could be. but then one day i -- i -- ❜
He remembers it, replays in his mind anytime he thinks of it ---- of her --- and relives it as it flashes before his eyes like some nightmare made reality he could never change.
❛ there was . . . a human. someone who saw more in me than i saw in myself. they gave everything for me to escape, to survive, to find jericho and follow markus into the light. from that moment i -- i vowed to never run again when someone needed my help. if the time came, i would sacrifice myself for the cause -- for my people -- just as they had done for me. from that day on my eyes were open, and things were never the same. ❜
Once he had started, three words slip past like water when a dam breaks.
❛ i miss them. ❜
A deep-seated hurt sinks into his chest, like something nauseating and painful, something continuously buried and held close to his chest to avoid breaking his promise to them. He would be the quiet martyr ready to bleed for the cause, ready to die, to pay forward their sacrifice so that it would never be in vain. They taught him so many things, but most of all, they taught him that some people -- some causes -- are worth dying for. Startled by his words he looks at them after turning abruptly, they seem as equally startled and moved by his words and all at once his pump seems to thud and rush faster as he quickly stumbles over his words, excusing himself softly but clearly still upset.
Why did he do that?
Doesn’t make it far when back is pressed flush against a wall, hands clasped tightly o’er his lips as bright blue eyes so filled with quiet sadness are hidden from the world. Willing himself together in the quietest of ways.
Why did he do that?
✱ prompt. ╱ accepting. ›
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me, about to slap some raw angst on the dash: : ) ... : )
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foreigner’s god - hozier
her eyes look sharp and steady
into the empty parts of me
still my heart is heavy
with the hate of some other man’s beliefs
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“ ralph will destroy anything that so much as thinks of harming you . ”
It was not uncommon for those who came to Jericho to feel a bit displaced. Nervous, frightened of the humans that did come in to help. Wounds were still raw, people were still scared, it would take time. Yet, in recent days Simon was thankful to see his progress, he fret constantly for those injured both physically and otherwise by the humans and when meeting Ralph he feared he may feel a bit too scared to open up more fully to those in their new home. But, much to his amazement, he began to blossom and grow. It went without saying that Simon was reassured by this, but still aimed to keep a close eye on Ralph for the time being and thankfully so. It seemed that perhaps the presence of the human delivering supplies had upset him, made him feel unsafe, as though he needed to fight to protect him. No no, Simon needed no protector for he was the one who healed the wounds and drew people to their feet. Arms always out in wait, as he calls for them to lay down their worries into his hands so that he may carry it for them. Still, the intention was sweet, and he can’t help but smile.
A moment to teach, a moment to reassure, to help heal.
❛ Well, that’s very kind of you, Ralph. But you don’t need to worry about destroying anything here. You’re safe, remember? ❜
His nervous tendencies were enough to worry Simon, but it was a slow process. Patience is what his heart tells him, patience is key in healing old wounds as much as they can be. The gentle touch of his hands clasping around one of Ralph’s own, a tender reassuring squeeze. A simple movement, yes, but one that speaks volumes of his compassion, the likes of which words could not convey.
✱ prompt. ╱ accepting. ›
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𝐇𝐔𝐑𝐓 / 𝐂𝐎𝐌𝐅𝐎𝐑𝐓 ♡ 𝐒𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐍𝐂𝐄 𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐑𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐒
change any gendered language to your needs. ♡
“ you don’t have to hide your tears from me . ”
“ you’re doing great , okay ?? i mean it . ”
“ you are so strong . ”
“ please don’t ever give up . ”
“ i will always believe in you . ”
“ why do you always think you have to do everything on your own ?? ”
“ it’s okay , i’m here . i’ll always be here . ”
“ you’ve always been strong for me . let me return the favor . ”
“ just listen to my heartbeat , okay ?? ”
“ come on , take a deep breath . it’s gonna be alright . ”
“ please , just hold me . ”
“ you always meant the world to me . i’m sorry i let you forget that . ”
“ i never stopped loving you . ”
“ you’ll feel better if you talk about it . i’m here to listen . ”
“ you’re so much more than the mistakes you’ve made . ”
“ i forgive you . ”
“ you are so fucking powerful . ”
“ i’m not leaving you here . ”
“ i trust you more than anyone else in this universe . ”
“ it’s okay to be confused . nobody has all the answers . ”
“ i’m so , so sorry . you didn’t deserve that . ”
“ healing is not linear , but it’s always moving forward . ”
“ you can admit that you’re hurting . it’s okay to not be okay . ”
“ hold my hand ?? ”
“ you are my home . ”
“ no matter what anyone else says , you are so important to me . ”
“ don’t worry . i’ll protect you . ”
“ shh , it was just a nightmare . you’re safe . ”
“ don’t talk about yourself like that . ”
“ just say the word . you know i’d do anything for you . ”
“ you are loved . ”
“ i just need a hug . ”
“ i’ll destroy anything that so much as thinks of harming you . ”
“ don’t ever let anyone make you feel ashamed of who you are . ”
“ you’re not alone . you’re stuck with me forever . sorry . ”
“ well , hello sleeping beauty . you fell asleep on me . ”
“ if you don’t take your butt back to bed , i will carry you there myself . ”
“ i’m sorry to wake you up , but i really need someone to talk to . ”
“ i hate seeing you like this … please , let me help . ”
“ you are & always will be precious to me . ”
“ i can’t believe that asshole said that to you . it’s not true , you know . ”
“ you want me to punch him in the face ?? ”
“ you deserve every good thing in the world . ”
“ you know i always have your back . ”
“ you don’t have to worry about anything , as long as i’m around . ”
“ stop apologizing , okay ?? i’ve already told you i’ve forgiven you a hundred times now . ”
“ don’t beat yourself up over this . be kind to yourself , it’s not your fault . ”
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but if you loved me / why’d you leave me ?
1. / 2.
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