Strange Practice has Varney but it seems his backstory is only the Bannerworth saga
I think the author may have only read the Project Gutenberg version, which only has a hundred some chapters - it cuts off before the Bannerworths are even entirely gone from the story. Which is a shame, because IMO the latter half of the story is better. Still bad, mind you, but the author actually remembers to make Varney do vampire things. He gets character development, including roughly 4 different contradictory tragic backstories. He gets to do more Scooby-Doo villain shit. At one point, every other character turns out to also be doing Scooby-Doo villain shit in one massive pile of schemes and silly disguises. It's great.
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Commission for @fruitviking based on their Sherlock Holmes fic These Hands of Mine, which you can read here. Check it out!
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you believe me like a god // i'll betray you like a man
credits:
Song lyrics taken from I'm Your Man by Mitski
Artworks referenced:
The Annunciation - Workshop of Fra Filippo Lippi
Last Judgment in an Initial C - Lorenzo Monaco (Piero di Giovanni)
Boy with a Greyhound - Paolo Veronese (Paolo Caliari)
Venus and Adonis - Peter Paul Rubens
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Is this rewrite going to follow the initial "Varney is a Bannerworth ancestor" or the confessional final backstory of divine justice making him a vampire? Also end the way the penny dreadful ended?
It's, ah, not precisely a rewrite of the original--I mean, I am rewriting a bunch of stuff, but that wasn't the point of the exercise. My magnum opus [citation needed] is a queerplatonic Varney/Charles Holland shipfic. There's like six different biting scenes. It ends with time travel. Clarimonde is mentioned.
Varney's precise origins are left purposefully mysterious but I've made him a lot older than either backstory you mentioned, using his "was alive during the time of Edward III" story from the vampire council chapter as an excuse to make him older than the Black Death.
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does the faceplanting varney and clarimonde you iirc posted on Christmas on lxgf have an explanation
(In reference to this post)
Nah, not really. They're just having Floor Time.
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i wouldn't be teasing it like this if i wasn't!
it'll be a while, though. this thing is pushing 30k on chapter 8/11, by the time it's done it'll probably be novel-length. i have NO idea how long those last 3 chapters will take me to write
ah shit it's the fuckin. vampyre
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this is actually an illustration for an in-progress fic, the next thing he does is chuck a man and take off running at top speed
which is still in character.
ah shit it's the fuckin. vampyre
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ah shit it's the fuckin. vampyre
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(Answering a block of Varney-related anons in one go)
You're so correct for this. Maybe it could have happened if Varney hadn't immediately left for Naples in the middle of the night...alas.
jonathan has had ENOUGH of tall vampires invading his personal space. fortunately varney respects boundaries (when those boundaries are being enforced via giant knife)
Chillingworth's skepticism is on another level, man. Some characters can be stubbornly set in their ways; some are reluctant to come to terms with the existence of the supernatural. All fairly reasonable reactions. Chillingworth treats skepticism like a deeply held religious belief. He literally says he wouldn't believe in vampires if he was bitten by one. Jack looks superstitious by comparison.
[nods sagely] Floyd.
(If you were genuinely confused: there is no character named Floyd in Varney the Vampire. "Floyd Dracula" is my joke name for a minor character that shows up, an unnamed vampire who also happens to be a Hungarian nobleman. When I was reading Varney and liveblogging it to my friends the initial joke was that the Hungarian nobleman was Dracula; then, when it became evident that he's even more of a slapstick character than Varney is, changed it to "Dracula's shitty younger cousin", and then later to "guy who pretends to be related to Dracula for clout". I picked the name Floyd because it sounds jarringly anachronistic.)
Yep, that's Admiral Bell.
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You're absolutely correct, and also that impression only gets stronger the further into the story you get. Varney is the saddest soggiest vampire in existence.
As far as scenes on the subject, congratulations on unlocking a couple more drawings I haven't posted to tumblr yet!
I started reading Varney the Vampire, and I'm pretty sure that if the Dracula crew ever met him, they would instantly adopt him because he's such a sad wet cat of a man.
110% agree. @mayhemchicken-artblog has actually drawn a scene or two on the subject I believe 👀
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...VARNEY POSTING PART 12 IT TURNS OUT I MISSED A COUPLE
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That's a lot of guys he has bit do they turn
Nah, the mechanism for Becoming A Vampire is a lot more complicated than that in Varney the Vampire, and in fact doesn't seem to be explicitly linked to getting bitten at all. The main component to becoming a vampire is having another vampire do a funny little ritual over your dead body. Being bitten isn't a prerequisite so long as your vibes are rancid enough.
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Yeeeah it is way scarier if the vampire can eat anyone. Can you imagine Dracula but when Jonathan cuts himself Dracula goes ":/ not a girl" or the first mate goes "good thing vampirism is no threat to me or I'd need to jump" or Dracula trying to eat Mina and going "curses, foiled by matrimony". Then the threat is that no one is safe from the vampire, not just Girl Virginity.
Yes, exactly. When the human heroes go on a dumbass expedition to the crypt in the middle of the night I need to be at least a little bit worried that the vampire might Fucking Get Them or what's the point??
Also, vampires only being a threat to Girl Virginity is creepy in a bad way and the subtext implied by it is definitely not something I'm keen to preserve from the original text.
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