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[myownparadise96]

The Ripe and The Ruin (Chapter 3)

Pairing: Jake Kiszka x Reader, OC x Reader

Word Count: 19.8k

Warnings: Language, Alcohol, Smoking, Angst, Anxiety, Embarrassment, Lying, Sexual Themes, Kissing, Oral M! Receiving, Protected Sex.

Find the Playlist Here: Apple Music | Spotify

A new series in collaboration with my talented co-writer @gretavanmoon.

"Like all good fruit, the balance of life is in the ripe and ruin."

AMSTERDAM, NETHERLANDS

HER POV

The heat of your breath is fogging up the windows of the van as you drift in and out of a dazy snooze. The morning has already been long, with a wake-up time of 3:30AM to be on the van to the airport by 4:00AM. The flight to Amsterdam from Hamburg was short, only a little over an hour long, thank goodness. However, now all you can think about is getting checked into your hotel room and crashing back out for a couple of hours before you have to wake up again. 

Paul, Wes, and Corri are occupying the seats toward the front of the van, and you’re thankful you can let your head rest on the window in peace. Your AirPods are stuck in your ears with the volume just loud enough that you could hear if one of them spoke to you, but still enough to fully enjoy the music floating through your ears. You don’t even dare listen to the playlist Jake made for you, it almost puts a sour taste in your mouth just looking at it, especially after what happened last night. 

Of course Josh caught you. Of course it had to be him. But what is really still throwing you for a loop is why Josh felt he had to keep the encounter such a secret, locking his lips and doing away with the key. 

Jake hadn’t said anything about your last addition of ‘High and Dry’, but you chalked it up to him just wanting to diffuse the situation after you left the bar, alone. You thought he might walk you back, given the situation you’d found yourself in just two nights prior, but he didn’t. He stayed, and let you go. And thankfully you’d made it back safely by yourself. 

The more you think about it, the more you realize Jake had plenty of time to text a quick ‘Sorry about that’ or ‘We’ll talk tomorrow, goodnight…’ but he didn’t. Again. Just left you….high and dry. And what made it even worse was that as you were trying to fall asleep in your hotel room last night, you heard the faint sound of the song playing out in the hallway. Jake was coming back to his room, listening to the song you added for him as he meandered closer and closer. But instead of a knock on your door, all you heard was the latch of his closing. 

You find yourself feeling a little pissed off, because the moment you shared in the dark bathroom really felt like something. It was…very fucking hot, if you’re being honest. He felt good. He felt strong, and sturdy, but also gentle and delicate when he needed to be. You can almost still feel how he felt between your legs, pressed up against you as you sat on the edge of the sink. His hands on your back, mouth on your neck, fingertips digging into your thighs….

“Y/N! Let’s get out of here!” You hear Corri’s brash voice wake you from your rated-R daydream, and you have to blink a few times to get the image of Jake all over you out of your head. You stretch a little and pull the music from your ears as the cab light comes on, and the four of you exit the van. You check into your far too luxurious hotel room, and crash onto the bed without even bothering to change your clothes. 

—

Your alarm startles you two hours later, and surprisingly the cat nap has you feeling extremely refreshed. You jump from the bed and pull the curtains on the window, showing you the scene of a cloudy Amsterdam from your fourth-story room. You can feel the cold air moving through the window, and you know it’s going to be another bitterly chilly day. 

After a quick rinse-shower, you sit back on the bed to check your phone and emails and see you have a text from an unknown number from just ten minutes ago.

Unknown

9:02AM: Hey! We’re going to go see the city and walk around a little, you want to go?

You deduce that it is probably Mia or Lyla, and you contemplate on whether or not you want to even move from your bed today. But after a little thought, and another glance to the sun barely peeking through the clouds, you decide, why the hell not. You don’t want to see Jake, really, but the regret you’d feel for not seeing Amsterdam while you’re here would probably be worse. You send up a quick prayer that Josh will keep your secret today, and not make things any more awkward than they already are. 

You

9:04AM: Hey, sure! I’d love to 😊

Unknown

9:05AM: Cool! We’re leaving in an hour, we’ll meet up in the lobby. Dress warm!

9:05AM: This is Lyla, btw

You

9:06AM: Sounds great, see you in a bit

You lock your phone and stand up to finish getting dressed, adding on a few more layers to your already warm attire. Your stomach churns with nerves, but you’re excited to see the city and maybe get to know the girls a little better. Plus, Ruth is begging you for photos. 

Speaking of Ruth…

You grab your phone and pull it from the charging cord, bringing up her contact for a FaceTime call. It rings out, and you press your eyeball directly to the front camera lens.

“Shit, what the hell, cyclops!” She yells as you pull away snickering. 

“Why is it so dark in your room?” you ask, realizing you hadn’t even thought about the time difference. 

“Because it’s two o’clock in the fuckin’ morning here, dimwit! I answered because you scared me. Are you okay?” she spouts off with her voice cracking from sleep. 

“Shit, I’m sorry. Yes, I’m fine,” you laugh a little as she rubs her eyes in the light of her phone screen. “I’m in Amsterdam, thought I’d give you a rundown but, you need to go back to sleep,” you say. 

“Ugh, if I didn’t have to wake up in three hours for work I would disagree with you. Yeah, just text me. Actually no, that will take too long. Send voice memos. Or a video or something.”

You take a quick breath. “I have a lot to tell you, Ruthie.”

“Fuck, seriously? Damn it, just…send something I don’t care. I gotta know. Is it bad news? It’s good news, right?” she goes on.

You roll your eyes a bit as you place your fingers over your mouth. “It’s…a lot. Good and, well not the best. Go back to sleep. I love you.”

“Kay nighty night.” Her last words were said with her eyes closed, and you know for a fact she’s already drifted back off into her slumber. 

You plop onto your bed and scroll social media for a few minutes as you try to kill time, feeling your stomach start to growl and grumble against the mattress below you. 

Maybe you should you add a song? 

No… You’d be seeing Jake in the next little bit, and you were the last one to make contact. This is up to him, if he even wants to. You stand and grab up your long, heavy coat, making sure you have everything you need for the day before taking off to the lobby to grab a quick breakfast and wait on everyone else. 

—

JAKE POV

The music swirling through the steamy air comes to a close as you spin the handle on the shower faucet, the water slowly trickling to a stop. The song she sent last night has been stuck in your head since you hung up with Isla, and you have let it be the soundtrack to your life in the hours since. You spent nearly the entire shower thinking about Y/N, listening along to the track and letting it seep into your bones. You thought about her, and only her for the past few days now. How you left her last night, and how you have yet to speak to her since. Even the plane ride this morning was spent in silence. You knew you needed to answer her song, say something to explain yourself. You were going to, you just had to figure it out, and now that you had time to sit down and think about it, uninterrupted, you would. 

Get out, dry off, get dressed and answer her. You had a plan, and you were sticking to it. 

You step out of the large walk in shower, wrapping the fluffy white towel around your waist. You take a second to look at your surroundings, remembering how only a few years ago you were all bringing towels from home, feeling lucky enough to shower in a rundown Motel 6 bathroom in the middle of nowhere. Your life had changed drastically in a matter of years, and it wasn’t long into that success when you first met Isla. 

She was a vision of auburn hair as she swept through the bar that night, so light and so carefree. You could see why Lyla and Sam had befriended her, her personality very much the same as theirs. It wasn’t long after that night that the two of you started seeing each other, things quickly becoming serious. A year later she moved into your house. It was like she was always there, making the space her own and sharing her days with you. She was with you as the band really started to make moves, never once complaining about the late nights or the long stretches of tour, that is, until she did. 

Things started to change last summer. The once light and vibrant girl you fell in love with had become catty and accusatory, her light burning out and her desire to be something other than your girlfriend dwindling away to nothing. It became her, consumed her, and suddenly you became an accessory instead of a partner. Nothing seemed to satisfy her anymore, and the time you could give her was never enough. She reminded you of that, often, as if there was anything you could do to change it. You fought like cats and dogs on any given day, each argument always ending in a band-aid resolution that never got you anywhere. 

There were the big ones, the ones that would have you on the couch at Josh’s or in the guest room at Sam’s. The ones they didn’t ask about because they knew better, instead opening their homes and lending their liquor cabinet. The ones that you didn’t dare mention, even months after the fact, for fear of starting it all over again. Those fights started to get closer and closer together, until you found yourself almost needing to chip in for your brothers’ mortgage payments.

You knew it was done. You knew it was over, but the problem wasn’t that you couldn’t do it. No, the problem was that every time you would try, it wouldn’t stick. Listening to her tell you that your reasons were never good enough, or that it would be too hard to end things before you left. It was always before you left, and this time was no different. 

Your phone buzzing on the bathroom counter snaps you back to reality, watching as it slowly inches its way closer and closer to the edge. You snatch it up as your hair drips down your back, sliding your finger across the glass as you scoff at the name on the Caller ID.

“Hello, Josh.”

“Oh, so they didn’t invite you either? Assholes…” he grumbles under his breath. 

“Invite me where? Who?” you ask, making your way back into the room.

“Sam and Daniel, and the girls I guess…” he pauses, “Just checked their location to see if they wanted to get brunch and they fucked off into town without us. Not even an invite.” 

“Really?” you ask, pulling your phone away from your ear to check your texts. “Shit, yeah, I didn’t get a text from them either. Though, I did tell them I was gonna catch a few more hours of sleep when we got here. Can’t you just go with Ty?” You groan, knowing you really planned to stay in your room all day and binge watch Criminal Minds.

“No. He went for a massage a little while ago, so now you have to go with me,” he says matter of factly. 

“Do I? I don’t think I do, actually.”

“No, you do, it’s in the rule book,” he answers, an air of playfulness in his voice. 

“The rule book…Don’t think I got one of those,” you joke, pulling on a pair of boxers. 

“Yeah, they give it to the head twin, you know, the first one out,” he laughs. “I’m in charge, the book says so, and I say brunch with a Mimosa. If you’re good I’ll even get you a Bloody Mary, my treat. Meet me downstairs in like fifteen,” he says, ending the call before you even have a chance to decline. Fucker, he knew you too well. 

You quickly dress yourself, checking your phone no less than five times just to see if maybe she had said something, but still there is silence. Your plan has officially gone to shit, no surprise there. You promised yourself you’d do it when you got back. No excuses. You huff out a sigh as you spray your cologne, grabbing your wallet and your phone and shoving them into your coat pocket. You make your way downstairs to meet Josh, finding him lounging in a wingback chair nearly double his size. 

“Let’s go before I change my mind,” you offer, watching him spring out of the chair, his white Nike’s scuffing loudly against the marble tiles. 

“Did you text Dean?” you ask, pushing open the glass doors. 

“Yeah, the place I want to go is just a block away, said to call him if we need him but keep our wits about us. Told him I would, but can’t speak for you since you don’t have any.”

You stop walking and start to turn around, definitely not in the headspace for his antics today. He stops too, and you feel him grab your arm and sling you back in the right direction. 

“Alright, alright, sheesh, no games today, got it,” he says, feigning guilt. 

You walk in silence the rest of the way, ducking into a little cafe with a heated patio. You felt like you hadn’t seen the sun in days and both of you quickly agree that the patio might be your only chance. 

Your eyes scan the menu, looking for any words that seem familiar to you. You’re about half way through it when Josh pulls your menu down and looks you in the eye. You know what he wants, and you know you have to tell him, but you need a drink first, at the very minimum. 

Saved by the bell your waiter comes to your table, taking your drink orders and rushing off before you could blink. 

As expected the grilling starts, and much to your dismay you are alone on the patio with no chance of anyone hearing the two of you bicker.

“Alright Jake, I let you sleep on it. Time to talk,” he starts, crossing his arms over his chest. 

You rub your hand over your face, truly not knowing where to begin. You let out a sigh, and he seems to pick up on your inner turmoil. 

“Start wherever, but I would probably choose the beginning.”

You move your fingers to your lips, looking at him with challenging eyes “What is it exactly that you want to know, Josh? I mean–”

“Cut the shit, Jake. What is going on? I want everything, top to bottom, now,” he snaps, aggression present in his tone. 

“You’re mad for no fuckin’ reason, Josh!”

“No, I’m mad for great reason, Jake! You’re out here fucking around with our runner, two days into the tour mind you, while your girlfriend is back in Nashville living in your home!” he seethes, his fists clenched tightly on top of the white tablecloth. 

Your blood is boiling as he finishes his tirade. “Knock it the fuck off, you know damn good and well she is not my girlfriend anymore!”

“Do I? Do I, Jake? Last I heard, you were ‘easing off for a little bit’...” he replies, gesturing air quotes.

“Do you honestly think that I would have been living in your house for the last month if we were ‘just ‘easing off’? You retort, gesturing the same air quotes. 

Josh sits back in his chair a little, his aggression backing off just a little bit, enough for you to keep talking. “Explain.”

You blow out a breath of frustration, “She doesn’t get it, Josh. I can’t seem to get it through her head.”

“What?”

You bite your lips together before you answer, “I have tried to end things no less than five times in the last few months. There’s always some reason… Always something that…Fuck, I don’t know. It just never sticks. She won’t hear it,” you pause, “I was serious this time though, Josh. I told her point blank, I do not want to be together anymore. It was like I was speaking fucking Latin, she refused to hear me. We were up the entire night arguing, man. It’s… It’s just so done, and I’m the only one who can see it apparently.”

“So if she won’t accept it, you’re still technically together, though? She’s still in the house?” he asks, rubbing his fingers over his beard. 

“Yeah, I mean, I guess? But also, No? The only way I could get the fuck out of that house in time to make it on the plane, was by agreeing to a ‘break’. But it’s not a break. I’m done, she knows I’m done. Told her she could still live in the house for a bit until she found her own place, but I told her, point blank, we needed to separate. No contact. You can see how that is going for her.”

“Does she know that you are…you know, seeing other people?” he asks, a bit of hesitancy in his voice. 

“Am I supposed to care? We aren’t together!” you argue. 

“But you kind of are Jacob!” he spits, “Look, I’m not trying to like, take her side here or whatever, but if she is under the impression you two are only on a break, I highly doubt she would be okay with you seeing other people. You’ll be labeled a cheater and god knows what else if she catches wind.”

“This is the messiest shit I have ever been a part of. I swear to god…” you groan, rubbing your hand over your face. “I seriously never thought I would find myself going through something like this.”

His brows pinch together in confusion, “So why didn’t you just say straight up, I want to separate, please move out of my home?”

“I mean, I kind of did, I think. It’s so much more complicated when you’ve been together as long as we have. We’ve had the exact same argument hundreds of times, that’s no exaggeration. She lives with me, man… I can’t just expect her to move out overnight, ya know? Which is why I agreed to the break. To give her time to…Get her shit together, I guess. But she knows I’m out. She has to know.”

“But she is still calling and texting you daily?” he asks. 

“All fucking day everyday. I never reply, and she still continues. As if– as if nothing ever happened. Like I said, she is just not getting it,” you explain. “Every time I would come stay at your place, she would just… come up with some reason, or some excuse to get me to come home for a few nights. We would just bandaid the problem, until it just exploded again and I’d end up back at your house or at Sam’s. But I had to be careful at Sam’s because Lyla is her best fuckin’ friend. You’d think she would have caught the drift after so many nights of me crashing there that things weren’t good. I don’t know, I hate this shit, I have suffered long enough. I want out. And I fear that when we get home, I might have to take more drastic measures. And I don’t want that shit, either.”

“So things are a lot worse than you initially led on…” he states, shaking his head as he sips from his glass. 

“Yeah, I guess so. Shit’s embarrassing, man. It’s rocky as hell and I don’t know what to do. I obviously still care for her as a person, but I just can’t do this with her anymore. I thought this time and space away from each other would help me get my head right and find a way to sort this shit out, but it seems like it’s only gotten worse and even more complicated since even a month ago, before we ever even left,” you continue. 

“And now there’s Y/N…” he grimaces, truly starting to understand your predicament. “I mean, it’s really only been, what, two days?”

You let out a sigh and shake your head, “Yeah, yeah. But I can honestly say that I have felt more in the last two days for Y/N than I have felt for Isla in the last year.”

“Do you think maybe… She’s…just a distraction from your real feelings? Like a space filler type of thing while you figure out shit with Isla?” he asks, broaching the subject very gently. “To be fair, I don’t blame you at all, she’s really gorgeous and a lovely girl from the little I’ve talked to her.”

“I know it looks that way, trust me. I do. But, no… It’s something else. I know it's only been two days, but there is something there, and I have to explore it,” you admit. “Like I said, I feel things I haven’t felt in so long. Not just physical things, either. And yeah, I know she works for us, and shit, but I– It was about two minutes into that plane ride that I knew it didn’t matter. I had to get to know her.”

“Answer me this, do you still love Isla?” he asks, leaning his elbows onto the table as he gives you that horribly painful twin stare that you both can only give to one another. The kind that pulls the truth from you no matter how badly you might not want to admit it. 

“I mean, I love her as a person, but no, I haven’t been in love with her in some time,” you confess. 

“In your mind is there any chance of reconciliation?” 

Your mind flashes through a hundred scenes of screaming fights, thrown objects, tears and accusations, “No. Not anymore,” you pause, rubbing your lips. “A week ago if you asked me that, I might have said maybe. It would be so easy to fall back into the good routine we had, everything would be good again for a little while at least, but it would change and we would be back to where we are now. Endless fuckin’ cycle. I can’t do that my whole life, Josh. I don’t deserve that. I was so excited about this leg of tour, just because she wasn’t coming. I could be alone and not go to bed mad and arguing every night. Do you know how fucked that is? That is not how I should feel about the person I am supposedly in love with. I should want her here, and I just don’t.”

He nods his head in agreement, sucking his teeth with a hiss. 

“Two days with Y/N has proven to me just how unhappy I am in that relationship with Isla. How much I’m just…not in love with her anymore. It only confirms my decision,” you admit. 

“So she’s calling and stuff to try and keep you strung along… So that you’ll come home and pick right back up on this nasty cycle the two of you are in…” he questions. 

“Basically. Which is why I refuse to engage with it. She can text all she wants, I’m not answering her,” you snap. “Things aren’t black and white for her, they are very gray and for me they are stark white. I don’t know how to make it more clear.”

He drops his head and looks up at you as he leans on his elbows again, “Look, I’m sorry. I had no idea. I won’t say anything to anyone about last night, or whatever is going on with you and Y/N. I want you to be happy, and I can tell you haven’t been in a long time. I’m just really sorry I was such an ass. I wish you would have talked to me, you know, like we used to.”

“I know, I know. It’s my own pride that stopped me. I just, I feel like I'm on the precipice of being happy again, I just have to keep following it, even if it looks really bad from the outside,” you pause, “Also, you guys have to stop picking on her, she is innocent in all of this. She already thinks you guys don’t like her.”

“Oh, that's just not true, we all like her a lot, you have to tell her we don’t mean it,” he laughs, tilting his head to the side as he tosses back the rest of his mimosa. “Wait, does she know about Isla?”

“No, absolutely not,” you answer a little too quickly. 

“Are you… planning on telling her?” 

“Honestly, I haven’t really thought that far ahead, I mean, I know I need to. I wasn’t really planning on Isla blowing my phone up day and night. Guess I should have known better, huh?” you laugh, offering him a small smile. 

“You need to tell her, Jake. Don’t fuck it up before you even get things started,” he offers. 

“Don’t you know that’s my specialty?” you ask, sipping your spicy bloody mary. “I mean, last night is a whole other problem. When you saw us out there I had every intention of leaving that bar with her and taking her back to the hotel. It was all I could think about. But then you were out there with my phone and the shit with Isla. Fuck…I panicked. I just sent her back to the hotel. Left her out to dry like a fucking prick. Haven’t spoken to her since. She probably wants nothing to do with me at this point.”

“No, no I doubt that. She’s probably a little hurt, maybe a little confused, but I think she will come around. I saw the way she was looking at you last night,” he smiles. “But Jake, seriously. You have to tell her about Isla.”

“God, I know it just, why would I even be thinking about Isla when I’m with her? I swear it’s like none of it exists when we are with each other. Everything is easy.”

“Sounds like you found yourself someone special,” he smiles. 

“I think you’re right.”

—

HER POV

The morning had been spent walking up and down the streets of Amsterdam, getting lost and finding your way again over and over as you navigated the map app on Danny’s phone. To your surprise, Jake and Josh hadn’t joined you. Just you, Sam, Danny, Lyla and Mia. It felt a little strange at first, and you felt the fifth-wheel anxiety hit you hard as you trailed behind them, the two couples happy and holding hands as you all explored. But luckily, at the last second, Dean joined you on the excursion, insisting that five of you needed an escort. 

You’d taken the time to speak to Dean and get to know him a little; he’s a big burly man with cheeks that stay red and a beard and mustache that hide his mouth. He’s middle aged, and a man of few words, but you were determined to break through his exterior just a little bit, seeing as how he is one of your coworkers. 

Now, as you all are heading back to the hotel with your arms full of various shopping bags and leftover food cart goodies, the conversation you’d worked so hard to start up with Dean is flowing freely. The two of you converse about the job, about travel, about where each of you are from and how you got hooked up with these crazy four. He’s fairly easy to talk to, and you find yourself very calm in his presence. 

“I heard about what went down at the restaurant the other night, Ms. Y/N. I’m so sorry that happened to you,” he admits as you watch Lyla and Mia pull the guys into a tiny boutique.

“Oh, no need to apologize,” you respond, a little surprised, “It was no big deal, really. I made a stupid mistake by going out alone that late, I learned my lesson. Just glad Jake was able to come help me out.”

“Still, it’s one of my responsibilities to make sure everyone is safe. Mr. Jacob made it very clear that you’re on that list, too.” He pulls his phone from his pocket and pushes a few buttons before speaking again. “I’m gonna get your number right now, so you never find yourself in a situation like that again.” You nod as you agree, knowing that you should have had his number saved a long time ago. You switch phones with him as you each enter your respective numbers, and he smiles as he locks his, pushing it back into the pocket of his coat. It hits you that Jake must have had a conversation with him.

“We’ve got more security coming, I’m sure you’ve heard. They should be here within the next few days. This is usually a one man job, but… I guess as the band gets more and more popular, these kinds of things just need to naturally grow along with them,” he explains, keeping his head on a swivel as he eyes each of them inside the store. “Turns into a team effort.”

You nod, pushing your windblown hair behind your ear before shoving your freezing hand back in your pocket. “I did hear about that. Bet it brings everyone peace of mind having more hands on deck, especially you,” you offer.

“Mmhm,” he replies, “Most definitely. I’ve met these guys before, think everybody will like them. Real straightforward outfit. I’m their head of security, but with the way this group operates, they’re probably gonna be calling most of the shots, if not all of them.” He sucks his teeth, and you can’t tell if he’s irked or maybe, a little bit relieved to have the help. 

“You gonna be alright with that?” you press, hoping you’re not stepping on his toes. 

He shrugs one shoulder, and you can see his eyes darting around behind his sunglasses. “I’m only one guy, Ms. Y/N.” His response is blunt, so you decide to leave it at that. 

You take a second to browse the boutique, meeting up again with Lyla and Mia and gushing over sweaters and dresses that none of you could ever afford, and for the first time in two days, you’d gone more than half an hour without thinking about Jake. As soon as the memory of him and what happened last night flows back into your brain, you almost double over with a strange anxiety. You pull out your phone again, checking to see if he has texted at all, or added anything to the playlist, but you’re met with nothing. Nothing.

“Let’s go get a drink or something!” Mia finally suggests to the group as you congregate in front of the store on the sidewalk, and everyone agrees. “Danny baby, pull up somewhere to go.”

“Let’s just take off walking again, we passed like fifty pubs on the way here,” he argues, bursting through the group and walking down the sidewalk again. The tension feels like it has dissipated for the most part; you have to admit that at first you were still a little worried that things might be a little strange between all of you. But as soon as you all got a couple of drinks in you, the anxiety melts away, and you find yourself laughing along and fitting right in with them. The girls are really cool, and Danny and Sam together keep the conversation going with ease.

An hour or so later, you’re unlocking your hotel door and stripping the layers of clothing off as you now have gotten a little sweaty from the heat mixed with the alcohol. The sun had popped out a little, only adding to your need for a giant bottle of water, and to relax across your bed. As you scroll social media and flick through TV channels in languages you can’t understand, you find your mind drifting back to Jake again. At this point, you know he isn’t going to text. He isn’t going to call, he isn’t going to add another song. If he was going to, he would have by now. You swallow down the realization, flipping to your back to push a pillow over your face. You think about calling Ruth, but at the same time, you hardly even feel like talking about it. 

Just as you're about to scream into the void, you hear a knock at your door. Who in the world? You stand up and adjust your clothing and hair, expecting Corri or Paul to be delivering you some information in person. You unlatch the deadbolt and swing the door open, finding none other than Jake leaning with one hand on your door frame, and the other gripping a single deep burgundy flower. 

“Hey…” he mumbles, biting his lip. 

“Hey, sorry, I wasn’t expecting you…” you fumble over your words, not only because you hadn’t spoken all day, but because he looked so overwhelmingly delicious standing there effortlessly dripping sex in your doorway that you almost catch yourself drooling. Loose, dark slacks, a black button up revealing his chest, his hair freshly washed and still damp around the roots… His skin is still glowing from the heat of his shower, and you can smell his body wash mixed in with that damn cologne he apparently carries with him everywhere. Your eyes flick to the flower hanging loosely from his fingertips before meeting his eyes again.

“I know, I should have called first, ‘m sorry…” he stumbles, pulling his hand from his pocket and swiping it across his nose. 

“No no, it’s fine, um… did you need… you wanna come inside?” you weren’t quite sure what to offer at this point; he wouldn’t have shown up if he didn’t want to talk.

He stands up straight now, smoothing his hands over his shirt and then placing them both in his pockets. “No, actually, I came by to see if you would want to go on a walk with me,” he asks, a shyness in his tone that feels new to you. “And to bring you this.”

He extends his hand, offering you the dark red flower, multi petaled and fragrant. “Saw it earlier at a flower stand and I…I don’t know, I thought of you. Thought you should have it.”

You accept it from his fingers, bringing it to your nose to take in its earthy smell, “It’s beautiful, what is it?”

“It’s a Dahlia, I believe. The vendor said it was a Black Dahlia, but it looks dark red to me. I don’t know, I just thought it was pretty. Thought of you.” he smiles nervously. You stare at him as you twist the flower under your nose and think about his question. 

“So, a walk?” you reiterate, finding the idea both exhausting and appealing, seeing as how you had just gotten back from an extremely lengthy one with everyone else. “I really should stay in tonight, I… dunno…”

“Please?” he asks, squinting his eyes. “Just a short one, we don’t have to go far. I just– I saw something cool today, and I thought you might like to see it, too. Wanna show you…”

You huff a little as you lean your head on the edge of the open door. His eyes are pleading, and you can tell there’s more to his little plan than simply showing you something.

Maybe he wants to talk. Maybe he wants to explain things… sort it all out…

“Okay. We can go. But, I have to get dressed first,” you say, already dreading putting all those layers back on, but not feeling so bad about it because now you’ll be with him. You feel a little reluctant, the pissed-off feeling you’d had all day still lying heavily present in your mind. But, he’s making an effort, at least…

“Take your time. I’m just a floor up, 507,” he starts to back away, the tiniest satisfied grin forming on his face. His eyes travel up and down your body so fast you almost miss it. “Just come knock when you’re ready.” 

You close the door as he rounds the corner to the elevator, and you can’t help but feel that rush of nerves fly up your body again. He didn’t call, he didn’t text, he came to your door. With a flower. God, what a gentleman. You place the flower on the dresser, your heart pounding at the sweet gesture. You rush into the bathroom to freshen everything up and spruce your tangled hair, brushing some powder across your face and adding a little more mascara. You re-apply your favorite perfume to your wrists and neck, taking a little extra time to make sure you looked presentable in the full-length mirror on the wall. 

When you feel as if your appearance is as good as it's gonna get, you sit on your bed, wanting to make Jake wait for you just a little bit longer. You go ahead and pull up a facetime call with Ruth, waiting for the tone to ring out. 

The screen opens with Ruth holding up one finger, mouthing for you to hang on as she finishes out what looks to be a very annoying phone call with a client. She spins in her chair as she rolls her eyes, letting her head look at the ceiling as she uses her formal, professional voice to end the call.

“...You have an excellent day, ma’am. Mhm. Thank you, Buh-bye,” she presses a button on her phone and rips her headset off, fumbling for her airpods as she picks up her phone. “Oh my GOD today has been insane and I hate everything,” she complains as you watch the screen fill up with her face, and you hear the sound of her acrylic nails tapping all over her screen. You patiently wait, watching her loudly chew her gum, knowing that she has to clear away her notifications before she can even begin to have an uninterrupted conversation with you. “Okay I’m ready what the fuck has happened?!” 

You laugh, giving her the rundown of everything that happened since you last spoke, her facial expressions letting you know she is hanging on your every word. “...And now, he just showed up at my fucking door, and asked me on a date, I guess? After basically dry humping me in the bathroom then sending me home without another word,” you finish, whispering your words as if he could hear you. “I dunno, Ruth. Should I even go?”

“Are you fucking kidding me?! Yes you should go. Give him a chance to explain, at least. He wouldn’t have shown up to your door if he didn’t really want you to come, ya know?” she says, immediately noticing her word choice, and slyly smiling as she bounced her eyebrows.  

“Shut the fuck up. Ugh, yeah, you’re right. Does this outfit look okay?” you stand back and flip the camera around showing her yourself in the mirror. 

“Slayyyyyyyy that jacket is hot, where on earth did you even get it?!” she rolls her eyes. 

“From you. For my birthday. When you found out I was going to a colder climate,” you laugh. “Okay, I'm gonna go, I guess. I’ll text you later.”

“Live updates, please. I want to know the way this man ticks,” she teases.

“Shut up. Bye.” You end the call and grab your purse, making sure your room key is in your bag. You also make sure to grab the jacket Jake sent you home in last night, not able to bear another second staring at it draped across the back of the chair. 

—

“Thought you might want this back,” you say when Jake opens the door, taking the coat from your outstretched hand.

He smirks as he takes it, tossing it behind him to land on some unknown surface. “Looks better on you, but it’s one of only three jackets I brought with me.” You both laugh a little as you make your way down the hall and to the elevator. The whole ride down is silent, with both of you standing at opposite sides, more or less feeling no shame in drinking the other in. His arms and ankles are crossed as the elevator descends, and you can feel his eyes boring into you. 

“You look really nice today,” he offers as you exit the lobby and head back out into the freezing cold air. 

“Thank you,” you reply shyly, feeling the blush creep to your cheeks. “So do you…” you wanted to gush about how perfectly his hair is sitting around his face, how his shirt and jacket are hanging across his shoulders, how poised he just always seems to be without even trying… but you don’t. You hope to god you don’t run into any of his brothers, or anyone that you work with; coming up with an explanation why the two of you are out alone together again is something you truly don’t feel like dealing with right now. “So where are we going?”

“It’s called The Jordaan. It’s a really old neighborhood, with a canal going through the center. Bunch of little shops and stuff. Did you guys walk this way this morning?” you notice the lilt in his voice. 

You shake your head. “No, we went the opposite way,” you answer. It’s quiet for just a minute more as you pass by the crowds and other people on the streets. “Why didn’t you and Josh come along?”

He takes a quick breath. “Eh, we didn’t really receive an invite, honestly,” he laughs, stroking his fingers over his mustache. “Had to be Lyla or Mia’s idea to go, if I had to guess.” He was right, but you still felt bad. “But it was okay, me and Josh went to eat and got to… talk a little without the interruption of the other two. Kinda rare these days,” he smiles, and his knuckles brush across yours just barely. The light touch sends your bloodstream to a raging fire, and you have to stifle down the pull to grab his hand altogether. 

The sun is peeking through the heavy cloud cover of the evening, and you find yourself staring at the way Jake’s pulled his sunglasses to sit on top of his head, letting the gleam of the sunlight bounce into his mocha colored irises. He looks you in the eye each and every time he speaks, and commands your complete attention away from everything else around you. You’re pulled into him, letting your bodies barely touch and move together as you walk along. This attraction feels different than the heated, blurry, intense pull you had to one another last night. This feels innocent, even though you both know that it’s anything but. 

You turn a corner as you come along to the long line of homes and buildings, multicolored and old in their exteriors but, still holding just the right amount of charm to be an attraction. You catch yourself looking above to see the craftsmanship of them. “Wow…” you exclaim quietly as you peer up at the finely detailed architecture, staring in awe at the shape they are still in. You pull your phone from your pocket and start to take photos, zooming in on the details and making a mental note to send them straight to Ruth later. 

You walk up onto a little footbridge lined with parked bikes and people stopped to take photos. Suddenly Jake is behind you, barely resting his chin on your shoulder. “Gimme your phone, let me take your picture,” he murmurs in your ear. 

“Oh no, that’s okay…” Before the words can even escape your lips, he’s snatched your phone and started backing up, glancing behind him and back to your phone every few seconds. 

“You’re really good at taking my phone away and doing whatever you want with it, you know!” you yell at him in aggravation. 

He motions his free hand for you to scoot sideways, and then again for you to stop where you are. He snaps a few, turning the phone on its side to get every angle he can. You stand a bit awkwardly, hating that people are having to stop when they notice they are walking in line of the photo. Finally he finishes and rushes back over to you. “They look good! See?” he says, handing your phone back and swiping through them with you. “Now you’ll have record.”

You walk past a few secondhand shops and stores, and suddenly, something in one of the windows catches your eye. “Oh my god, look at that!” you squeal, pointing to a glimmering red dress sitting perfectly on a mannequin. It isn’t like any dress you’d seen before; it looks vintage, bright cherry red velvet with sewn-in sequins weaved throughout. It’s tight, but not too tight, and short and lacking fabric in all the right places. 

“Damn, you should go try it on!” Jake exclaims, obviously agreeing with your surprise at how pretty it is. 

“Nah, I shouldn’t…” you say, walking away from the window. 

“No, you should, actually. That dress is hot, Y/N,” he says, elbowing you in the ribs. “And I think you’d make it a hundred times hotter.”

You scoff. “Be quiet, no I would not.”

“Prove me wrong, then,” he challenges with a smirk, opening the door to the shop, and holding his hand out to invite you inside. 

You step inside, and are immediately greeted by a man dressed in a formal tuxedo. He notices that you are not local during his greeting, and switches to rough English.

“Eyeballing the red number, are you madam? Give me one second, I’ll grab it off the mannequin for you,” you and Jake lock eyes as the man flits away, straight for the window. He raises his eyebrows in anticipation and gives you a grin so adorable you almost melt into putty right there in the store. 

“Here you are ma’am, please, be careful, very old dress,” he explains, handing you the dress on a hanger and opening a curtain for you to go behind. 

“Go ahead,” Jake mouths, pushing you into the small dressing room. 

You stand almost naked in front of the mirror as you slip the soft, tight fabric over your thighs, your stomach, and finally over your shoulders. Jake was right, it fits you perfectly. The velvet material snatches your waist and bust, and cuts right above your knee. Its sequins shimmer in the overhead light, but aren’t so overwhelming that it looks showy. It’s something you could dress up, or dress down. You reach behind you and pull the zipper up only halfway. Of course.

You take a deep breath and pull the curtain back, finding Jake to have taken a seat on a plush maroon ottoman. His jaw drops as you walk toward him, and yet again, you feel the heat rise in your face. You continue walking toward him, turning at the last second with your back to him, pulling your hair to the side. “Finish doing me up?” you say, immediately realizing that could be taken in a way you didn’t really mean. But also kind of mean, if you’re being honest. 

You hear him swallow and he stands, and feel his warm hand slowly grip the zipper and pull it up, his other hand resting gently on the back of your hip, this thumb barely squeezing at the muscle. He takes his time, moving the zipper at the slowest pace imaginable. “Everything alright back there?” you whisper over your shoulder, hearing your own voice tremble. 

You hear the air push from his nose as he leans in a little closer. “Just taking my time… might be the only time I get to touch you this way…”

Your eyelids flutter closed at his words. You lick your lips, trying to calm your second heartbeat. “What makes you think this will be the only time?”

He finishes the zip, spinning you to turn and face him. He shrugs one shoulder. “Just don’t wanna get my hopes up,” he growls. “Take that as a compliment…if you wear that out in public, I wouldn’t stand a chance against the hordes of guys that would be following you around.”

You scoff at him, and the absolute absurdity of his statement. He has no idea how pretty he is, does he?

“Shh. That’s a lie,” you say as you turn back and motion for him to unzip you. He does, this time with a little more haste. You make your way back into the dressing room and switch back into your clothing, hanging the beautiful specimen back on the hanger the man had provided you with. 

“What? You’re not getting it?!” Jake stands as you make your way back toward the employee.

“No, Jake! I can’t buy that! It’s too–”

“Perfect? Because you looked… I–I can’t even explain… You have to get it, Y/N,” he argues.

You hand the dress back to the man in the suit. “No. I wouldn’t even have anywhere to wear something like that…” you go on, internally screaming at how badly you really would like to have it. 

“Let me get it for you, then,” Jake says. “It’s not even that expensive…”

“NO!” you squeal. “I mean, no thank you. Please, Jake. It’s completely fine,” you say as you begin to walk toward the exit. You simply could not let him buy this for you. No. Huh-uh. Absolutely the hell not. 

He reluctantly follows you out of the store, still playfully going on and on about how you just made a huge mistake. You turn and face him, your face only inches from his. You grab both of his hands in yours, snickering a little at the surprised look on his face. “Jake, I appreciate the compliments, but I’d really like to get on with our date, now.”

JAKE POV

Her words send a shockwave through your system. “Date? So it’s a date now?” you ask, your hands cupped in hers as he looks you in the eyes. 

She turns and begins walking again, and you have to physically tell yourself to move your legs and follow along. “You came to my door, asked me to go on a walk because you wanted to show me a certain specific special thing… now we’re exploring and talking and trying on dresses, I’d qualify this as a date,” she turns and gives you a teasing look of intrigue. “Just missing the food part, but I think it would still count.” 

A smile comes to your lips as you realize she’s right. “You hungry?” you ask, finally catching up with her. 

“No, I’m just kidding. Let’s go down to the riverside,” she points a little ways away, seeing that there is a sidewalk that runs alongside the water. 

You stuff your hands in your pockets as you trudge along, the two of you taking in the scenery and the water beside you. The air is still blowing cold, but neither of you seem to mind. “So if we’re gonna qualify this as a date, maybe we should get to know each other a little better,” you suggest, earning a scoff from her. 

“Seems a little backwards seeing as how we kinda already–”

“I know, I know,” you laugh. “Um, let’s see. Did you play any sports in school?” you ask. 

“I played volleyball all four years, golfed with my dad on the weekends sometimes when he was around… Other than that, not really,” she explains.

“Shit, don’t tell Danny you like golf,” you go on. “He’ll capture you in a week-long conversation and then ask you to go play a round in every country we visit,” you laugh. 

“Ummm, what’s your favorite holiday? And you can’t pick Christmas…” she says, pushing her pointer finger into your shoulder. 

“Hmm, so, I think it’s a tie between the Fourth of July and Thanksgiving, because in July we’re always out of the country somewhere really beautiful, or we’re all at home blowing shit up together. I’m always really happy that time of year. And then Thanksgiving, because I will eat the fuck out of mashed potatoes any chance I get,” you say. 

She laughs again, the sounds of her voice making your insides warm. “Your answer was better than mine!” 

“Let’s see… What's your best friend’s name?” Noticing that she hasn’t really mentioned anyone.

“My best friend’s name is Ruth, we’ve been friends since elementary school. She’s… a complete idiot,” she laughs. “We still talk pretty much daily about anything and everything,” she explains. “Don’t have any secrets.”

“Oh so, she’s… getting the rundown of your whole European adventure in real time, isn't she?” you ask, wondering if she had been giving her a play by play of the whirlwind last few days you'd shared together. 

She purses her lips and squints her eyes as her hand brushes past yours. “Guess you could say that…”

“Damn!” you laugh, feeling embarrassed. “Don’t tell me you included our bar bathroom escapade…”

Suddenly she’s tripping over her words. “I mean... No! I told her a little but like, not details or anything ya know, but she…I–” 

“So she knows we almost hooked up but thankfully stopped just in time that my brother didn’t catch things getting too out of hand…” you say confidently, wanting to see the blush rush her cheeks again. 

She stops, standing stiff in her place. “Okay, Jake. Caught me. Sue me, shit.”

You continue walking, pulling her along by the hand. “I’m kidding, I don’t care. I hope to meet her one day.”

She looks at you from the side of her eye, “I hope you do, too. Okay, who’s your best friend?”

“You really want me to answer that?” You’re surprised she can’t already tell. “I’ve got three built right in. All three pains in my ass but I love ‘em.”

“How sweet, Jake. Man, you do have a heart under there, somewhere!” she teases. 

“Of course I do baby, I’m actually a sweetheart, didn’t you know?” you respond in a very piratical voice. “Alright, favorite music genre. This is the big one, answer carefully…”

“Ahhh, well…” she looks to the ground, truly contemplating her answer. “You already know the Alt-J stuff you added was way out of my normal choice, I actually listen to um, a lot of harder stuff, I guess you could say. Some metal, hard rock, also older country, some psych stuff. It runs the whole gambit,” she laughs, seeming like she was shy to admit it all. 

“Wow,” you say. “So like, almost the exact opposite of what we’re into.”

“Kind of, I mean it probably overlaps… I love the stuff you’ve added to the list. And I’m sure there’s a few classic dad rock songs you like, don’t lie…” she smiles. 

“Ehhh,” you argue, “Maybe a few…” you feel a sudden slight disappointment in the fact that the two of you probably will not be able to talk music much. But, that’s okay…

“Me and my dad used to go to rock shows a lot when I was a kid. I’ve seen all the country greats a few times a piece. Just something about that sound, you know? Reminds me of home, it’s very nostalgic… I’m sorry, I’m rambling…” she says, brushing the hair from her face as you find yourself enraptured in her words. 

“No, no… it’s okay, ramble on…”

Light bulb. 

You sneakily pull your phone from your pocket, adding that very song to the playlist, hoping she won't notice right off the bat, but hoping she will understand soon that you would listen to her ramble all day long. As she continues to talk, you can’t help but notice all the ways that she is so different from Isla. Like night and day. She listens to you when you speak, she doesn’t ever come at you with condescending words unless she’s being playful, she is sure of herself, and confident…and gives you that feeling down deep in your gut that tells you she’s something special. Though you’ve only known her a few days, it’s already obvious that she offers every single thing that Isla doesn’t, never has, and most likely never will. Instead of the uneasy, walking on eggshells feeling that you have everytime you’re with Isla, you get the confident, self-assured and joyful feeling in Y/N’s presence. And something is telling you to hold onto it. 

Speaking of Isla… you really need to tell Y/N about her. It’s only right. It isn’t fair to her that she doesn’t have a clue, you wouldn’t have wanted to be left in the dark if the roles were reversed. You swallow, opening your mouth to start the conversation without having a clue where to even begin. But your thoughts are interrupted by Y/N’s sweet voice bringing you back down to earth again. 

“I know you bargained for a short walk, but what if we went up there to that little pub and see what they have to offer?” she asks, smiling a toothy grin.

Maybe the time isn’t now…

“Lead the way, love.”

—

HER POV

Warm. Everything is just so warm. Your body, your face, his smile. Warm. The room is a dull hum of noise around you, your world growing still as he sits in front of you. You watch him in wonder as he talks about music and his passions, your face propped up on your fist. You know you must look positively smitten, and to be honest you kind of are. The two of you are giggling back and forth, even though nothing is really that funny. But that was the beauty of it. You can tell you are blinking slowly and try to reign it in as the nearly half a liter of beer swirls through your bloodstream. You can’t help but smile at him while he talks, his eyes locked on yours as a smile stretches across his own face. 

You wonder how he is even able to hold a conversation right now, your brain reduced to mush as you continue to sip on your beer. He’s happy, you can tell, a dimple has appeared in his cheek and hasn’t left in nearly an hour. You can’t stop looking at it, at him. Everything about him. The twinkle lights over head have cast a perfect yellow glow on his tan skin, just as the sun starts to dip down below the river the two of you walked here from.

“You still with me, beautiful?” he asks, his knuckles brushing against yours. 

“I’m here, but barely.” you laugh, “Why aren’t you feeling the alcohol yet?” you tease, taking a rather large gulp of your beer.  You know he definitely has a higher tolerance than you do, but you can tell he is a little more smiley than usual. You place the large glass tankard back on the table as he stares at you, his eyes wide and sparkling. 

“What?” you ask, feeling a bit bashful in your drunken state. 

“You’re just…so– you’re just really pretty and it makes me feel, I don’t know, shy I guess,” he answers truthfully, biting his lips together nervously. 

You feel your chest burst into flames, the heat radiating up your face to your already flushed cheeks. 

“I like it when you blush,” he breathes, which of course makes you blush harder. “Like it best when it’s because of me.”

You feel all of your nervousness and anxiety melting away as he looks at you, and suddenly with the help of the beer, you feel brave enough to ask the question that has been on your mind all day. 

“Jake?”

He nods his head ever so slightly, letting his fingertips drift across your knuckles. 

“Why didn’t you answer? My song, how come you didn’t say anything?” you ask, swallowing down your last bit of nervousness. 

He drops his head a little, grabbing your hand in his, letting his thumb skate across your skin. “I searched and searched for a song that I could respond with last night. One that would articulate what I wanted to say, but I just…I couldn’t find one. I felt like absolute shit after you left, Y/N. Really, I did. I fell asleep with that damn song on replay until my alarm went off this morning. It got in my head, and that’s when I decided I wanted to go on this walk today. Make it up to you.”

You stare at him for just a second, letting a smile slowly creep to your lips. He notices and you watch him as he visibly relaxes. He was nervous, too. 

His eyes are locked on yours, both of you saying a thousand things with zero words. You let his words sink in, storing away each one until your heart feels a little bit lighter. 

“Well, you better think of a good one tonight,” you tease, rubbing your thumb against his. 

His phone buzzes on the table top, his eyes flashing down to it, then to you in panic. 

“It’s fine,” you nod, gesturing for him to grab it. “I don’t mind, really.”

He picks it up and clears his throat, the loss of his hand from yours stings a little but you know he will do it again. 

“From Josh,” he starts reading the message out loud, “Where are you? I knocked on your door and you didn’t answer.”

He smiles and laughs as his thumbs type back a response. 

“Oh, another one,” he pauses, “We’re meeting up for dinner, just the guys, in an hour.”

His face drops a little, his eyes looking across the table to you. He locks his phone and sets it back on the table, his hand seeking yours out again. 

“We should probably get going if you’re gonna make it back in time,” you offer, taking another sip of your beer. 

He lets out a painful sigh, “I don’t really want to. I want to stay out…with you. I see them all the time.”

“No, no, no, you’re in Amsterdam with your brothers. They want to see you. Don’t change your plans around for me,” you insist. 

He looks conflicted, you can tell he really does want to stay here with you, but he also knows he needs to meet up with them. 

“Well, what about you? What will you do?” he asks, tracing his index finger around your hand. 

You smile and shake your head, “Don’t worry about me, I’ll probably just go back to my room and do whatever it was I was going to do before you knocked on the door.”

He smiles and nods, licking his lips before speaking again, “If you’re sure, this is supposed to be me making it up to you for leaving you last night, now I seem to be doing it again.”

“Wanna know a secret?” 

He raises his eyebrows in question, ready to hear your answer.

“I forgave you for that about two minutes into our walk,” you smile, squeezing his hand in yours. 

—

He walks with you back to the hotel, his hand never leaving yours for a second. His grip is firm and warm, everything you ever dreamed of. You talk about the shops and the sights, and he tries again to convince you to buy that dress, bartering that he was going to have to go back and buy it himself if you refused. 

As you step up to the hotel door you pause, turning and looking at him in the glow of the streetlights. “You don’t have to walk me all the way up, I think I can find it.” you tease. 

“Alright, well, um, can I text you?” he asks, his tone reverting back to that of a nervous fifteen year old boy. 

You feel the butterflies taking flight in your stomach, flapping their wings so hard you feel like you might take off with them. “Yeah, you can text me whenever you want to.”

A huge smile spreads across his face, “Yeah, alright, cool. I’ll um, I’ll text you then.”

“I’ll be waiting,” you answer, watching him stifle back his smile as he steps back a bit, bringing your hand to his lips. He places a soft and gentle kiss to the top of your hand, his cold lips barely grazing your skin, and sending a jolt of electricity through you. 

“Won’t be long,” he smiles, stepping away and turning to head back down the street. 

—

JAKE POV

You follow the walk route to the pin that Josh had dropped, finding yourself at a tiny pub down a back alleyway of a street. The place is crowded and warm, ambient lights with the damp smell of cigars lingering in the air. You mosy through the crowd, hoping that no one recognizes you and stops you for a drunken conversation or autograph. 

Luckily it doesn’t happen, and you find Danny, Sam, and Josh tucked away at a high-top table in the corner. “There he is! Took you long enough!” Danny yells over the loud crowd, the first one of them to spot you. 

The other two turn to face you, pulling your stool out for you to take. “Your beer is probably warm, now…sorry,” Sam says, pointing to yet another giant mug of beer, just the same as the one you’d just finished off. 

“Fuck, thanks…” you say, tiptoeing to hop up onto the high stool. You simply can’t help the shit-eating grin that’s plastered across your face, even with all the maximum effort you have left in you. You take a large sip, finding the beer to still be fairly cold. 

“Where have you been already today? You look flushed and far too jovial…” Josh presses, rubbing his hands together with his elbows resting on the table. 

“Cold outside,” you say, shooting him a look. 

The bullshitting and argumentative discussions commence as everyone obviously begins to feel their alcohol, and you take the distracted time out to text Y/N, letting her know you made it safely. 

You

9:18PM: I’m here, but already wishing I never left

You attach a quick photo of your giant beer, and include the eye-rolling emoji.

Y/N

9:20PM: omg 😂 good luck choking another one down

You

9:21PM: Ye have little faith 🍺 

A minute later you receive a photo of her room service sprawled out across the bed in front of her, chicken fingers and fries and some type of dipping sauce. You smirk at how cute she probably looks in whatever outfit she chose to get comfy in, and wonder what she looks like. You notice the TV in the background, and recognize the movie that she has playing. 

You

9:24PM: Looks tasty

9:24PM: Damn, is that Wedding Crashers?

Y/N

9:25PM: Yes, I fucking love this movie

You run your hand over your face. 

You

9:26PM: That sucks, I quite literally can’t stand that movie 

Y/N:

9:26PM: 😱😱😱😱😱😱

9:26PM: You’re insane, this is one of my favorite movies of all time! Why do you hate it!

You

9:27PM: Dunno, not a sucker for cheap comedy I suppose

You’re interrupted by Sam’s snapping fingers in your face. “Hellooooo, Jake, you with us? Tell Isla to leave you the fuck alone, it’s guys’ night!” 

You feel your eyes widen at his comment and glance at Josh, who is mirroring your exact expression behind his folded hands. 

“Uh, sorry, sorry yeah.” You put your phone down on the table and try your best to be present with them, getting caught up in your normal absurd conversation. Your phone continues to light up and buzz on the table. 

“You gonna get that?” Josh asks slowly and quietly, just loud enough for you to hear. You ignore him, finishing off the last bit of your beer that went down exceptionally quicker than you thought it would. Everyone is sufficiently intoxicated, and you have to admit, you’re having a really great time letting loose. The drinks are flowing, and the air is high-spirited all the way around. Danny is taking funny videos of Sam and Josh as they try their hand at some type of trick with a coin and a bottle cap, so you take the second to check your phone again. But what you see brings your serotonin level down just a notch. 

Isla

10:12PM: Hey, what’s up?

10:27PM: Why aren’t you answering me babe :(

10:29PM: I miss youuuuu, you never called back last night

10:33PM: Saw Danny’s close friends story, glad to see you having fun ignoring my texts! 👋🏼

10:37PM: Can you accept my location request

10:42PM: I can see your phone in front of you Jake

You roll your eyes and mutter a quiet oh…my…god, rubbing your eyes with the palms of your hands. 

“What’s up?” Josh asks, and you turn your phone for him to see. His eyes instantly widen as he reads. 

“This…is the shit I’ve dealt with for the last three years. I can’t—” you cut yourself off, feeling your jaw clenching with aggravation. 

Josh settles back in his chair. “Fuck, I had no idea…”

“What, what is it?” Sam and Danny basically simultaneously ask, seeing the disdain falling over the both of you at the same time. 

“Nothin’, just a sad video,” Josh lies. 

You decide to let Isla’s antics roll off your shoulders; you’re having too good of a night to let her whining bring you down. Things with Y/N are starting to heat up, and you find your tipsy self teetering on the edge of risk. You pull her texts up again, finding that she had responded a while ago.

Y/N

9:30PM: You’re crazy, this movie is fuckin hilarious

You decide to change up the game a bit, adding a song that reflects exactly how you’re feeling right now. You scroll through your library and land on it, bringing up the option to add it to your shared playlist. It’s perfect, ‘In the Mood For You’ by The Record Company. 

She responds with a text a minute later, a string of five or six laughing emojis. You’re then met with a song addition on her end, ‘Are You Sure?’ by Willie Nelson. 

Holy shit holy shit. You feel your stomach get warm and your head starts to swim at the thought of where this could go, where you want it to go. You take a deep breath as the excitement builds in your system, and you can physically feel your body getting warm. You want to scream. Your eyes begin to cross a little as your thumbs hover over the screen, flicking around as you decide what to do. 

The next thing you know, Sam is setting another beer in front of your face, this one thankfully much, much smaller than the other one you had just finished off. Mother fucker...Gonna be very drunk.

You decide to skip out on a text, keeping this little game the two of you have going. You pull up the song search, adding ‘No One Else’ by Weezer. Perfect. 

Seconds later, you receive a text. 

Y/N

10:56PM: I’ll think about it…….

You feel your cheeks grow pink. 

Just then another comes through from Isla. 

Isla

10:57PM: Ignoring me isn’t going to fix anything, Jacob.

You scoff, shaking your head. You turn the phone to Josh again. 

“God, block her fucking number. I’m so serious,” his voice raises a little, laced with a protective tone. 

You ignore it, flipping back over to your texts with Y/N, suddenly feeling emboldened. 

You

10:59PM: Think about what, exactly? 

You lick your lips as you set the phone down, glancing around to see no one paying attention to you all up in your phone again. A minute later, you receive a photo. You click the message and watch as the attachment comes to life. 

It’s a selfie of Y/N sitting on the edge of the bed, dressed in a barely-there black silk pajama set, with the object of the photo obviously the empty side of the bed behind her. 

Y/N

11:01PM: You, here.

Son of a fucking bitch, she is gonna be the death of you. You pull your phone up so no one can see the picture, and you take a second to stare at her soft skin in the silk material, her hair a little messy but lying perfectly. She’s smiling just a little, and the dim light is bouncing off her features in all the right areas. 

You

11:03PM: Absolutely stunning

11:03PM: Are YOU sure?

Your heart is positively racing, watching as her text bubble pops up. 

Y/N

11:04PM: Only if you want to…

As the breath hitches in your throat as you’ve quite literally forgotten how to breathe, you take a second more, starting in on the beer Sam had provided. You lock your phone, trying to make up your mind of how to answer. What to do, what to do…

You finally decide to reply with a bold text. 

You

11:06PM: I think I can make that happen…😉

11:06PM: We shouldn’t be much longer

You get dragged back into conversation with the guys, and fifteen or so minutes later, everyone is gearing up to leave. You glance down at your phone a few minutes later, seeing that she hasn’t responded. Weird. 

Everyone stands to leave, and the alcohol hits you in the face. Yeah, pretty fairly intoxicated. You exit the building, feeling someone standing behind, close by. You turn to see Dean bringing up the rear of the group. “Whoa, where did you come from you scary motherfucker?” you tease, earning a big, warm smile from him.

“Been sitting at the bar all evening, Mr. Jake,” he responds, pointing for you to catch up with the rest of them. 

You rest a heavy hand on his shoulder. “You’re really good at your job, Dean. I never even knew you were there, should have come and had a drink with us.” You feel your words slurring a bit. Just then, you feel your phone buzzing in your pocket incessantly. 

“I wet my whistle with a shot of Jameson as soon as we got there, water the rest of the night,” he replies without looking at you. You laugh and step to the side a bit, pulling your phone out to see Isla calling. Fucking son of a bitch. You slide to answer it. 

“What, Isla? Fuck!” your tone is a bit more harsh than you had expected, but warranted nonetheless. 

Then, all you can hear on the other line is a rush of screams and yells, her voice loud and her words cramming as she lets you know how she feels. You pull the phone away from your ear, holding it there until you find a chance to speak again. 

“Whoa, whoa, slow down, can you–”

Her screams continue, and you realize exactly how this is going to go. How it’s gone hundreds of times before. She’s not gonna let you speak. And honestly, you’re too intoxicated to talk, anyway. You set it to speakerphone as Josh falls back to walk with you. You shake your head as you allow your twin to listen to her incessant rambling. “You hear this shit?” you mumble. The two of you listen for a second more before you realize you can’t do it anymore. 

“Isla, I’m hanging the phone up. Call me when you can have a mature conversation. Bye.” You don’t even wait for her to retaliate before pressing the big red button. In a huff, you bring up your text thread to see if Y/N has responded. Like the gods of divine intervention decided to reign down their bad luck upon you, you find that you had in fact sent those last two risky texts, to Isla.

“FUCK!” you yell, stopping in your tracks, hitting your palm to your forehead. “Fuck fuck fuck!” How could you have been so stupid?! Of course she had a reason to call and yell at you…

Your fingers move to Y/N’s thread, and you see that you were the one who had left her on read. You’re in the lobby of the hotel now, and everyone is dispersing to head to the elevator or down the halls to their respective rooms. You snap away for a second to tell them goodnight, before deciding to take the stairs up to your room. You needed a second, and to work off some of your drunkenness. 

You finally pop into your room, feeling completely idiotic for accidentally sending the right text to the wrong number. You splash some cold water on your face, hoping it will bring you back to earth a little bit, but finding it to have only made your splotchy face and tinted cheeks worse. You brush your teeth and take a piss, finally settling on the edge of your bed to think. 

Fuck it, you finally decide, bringing up your texts with Y/N once more. 

You

11:47PM: I think I can make that happen…

Surprisingly, she responds within the minute.

Y/N

11:47PM: Hey. Thought you had found someone else to sneak away to the bathroom…

Your nerves flush up all over again. We’re still in the clear.

You

11:48PM: Don’t be crazy fledgling. I’m finding you in 5 minutes. 

HER POV

Five minutes? Five minutes!  You stare at the screen for a few seconds before your brain starts to work again, giving you a mile long to-do list before he knocks on the door. 

“What!? What! What does it say?! Hello! Why do you look panicked!?” Ruth asks from the other end of the phone. 

“Oh my god, he’s coming to my room. Right now, he’s on his way right this second, holy shit I have to– I have to clean up! I need to brush my teeth, brush my hair? Shit, I can’t be wearing this! Oh my god, shit I do not have enough time!” you screech, tearing across the hotel room to clean up the best that you can. 

“Focus on yourself first! He doesn’t care about your messy room! Put on some deodorant for the love of god! Did you shave your legs today?! Wait, did you end up bringing that little black sleep set thing we found?” she asks, trying to help you prioritize. 

“Yes! I’m wearing it stupid! Can you not see me?!” you shout, the clocking continuing to tick by. 

“Fuck off, it’s blurry! Okay just go brush your teeth, brush your hair, deodorant, then let's work on the room. Hurry up!” 

You run into the bathroom, applying deodorant as quickly as possible and checking your legs for stubble. “I shaved this morning, but I think it’s fine.”

“Did you shave…everything?!” she asks, just as panicked as you are. 

“Yeah, thank god!” you answer, wetting your toothbrush. 

“Okay, game plan, keep brushing, just listen. He’s into you, you’re into him. He’s been flirting with you all night. He wants you babe, and if it were me? Well, I’d do it. I know what you’re gonna say, ‘Ruthie, I can’t give it up on the first date’, blah blah blah, I don’t care, fuck the police. He’s hot, you’re hot, you’re in Europe, and if you don’t sex that man tonight, you might not get the chance to again.” she lectures, giving you a stern look.

You spit your toothpaste into the sink, wiping your mouth and grabbing for your hair brush. You run it quickly through your hair as she continues. “God, I have got to know what this man is like in the bedroom. I am so living through you right now. I expect every detail first thing in the morning. Not noon, not three, morning.”

You grab your perfume from the bathroom counter and hold it up to the camera, “Should I, or too much?”

“Yes, you should, obviously! But don’t overdo it!” she yelps back. You spray the perfume onto your wrists, careful not to spray too much. 

“Alright, I feel better, but do you think I should change? Honestly, I feel so…”

“What? Hot, sexy? Drop dead gorgeous? Didn’t have a problem with it when you sent that picture earlier, what's different now?” she asks. 

“Well, nothing I guess, I just… He will see me in person. You can see my nipples!” you admit.

“I think he’s gonna see a lot more than your nipples tonight babe, that’s just the appetizer.” she laughs, crunching the ice from her drink. 

“Oh my god you are so gross, okay, fine. I just need to clean up the room and little and–”

A knock at the door renders you both silent. You mouth the words ‘oh my god’, as she laughs silently. 

“I’ll call you later,” you whisper, quickly ending the call and tossing your phone onto the dresser. You take a deep breath and smooth your hands over the black satin tank top, pushing your boobs up, but letting out a defeated sigh when they drop back into place. She better be right about this. 

You blow out a calming breath as you make your way towards the door, twisting the handle and pulling the door open. Leaning against your door frame you find Jake, cheeks flushed and somehow looking even better than he did this afternoon. He’s in the same clothes, and his hair is windblown, but there is something different about him. You can’t quite put your finger on it, but you file it away for later. 

You purse your lips in a smirk, “You said five minutes.”

He smiles and nods, “I did, but I had to make a pit stop.”

“What for?” you ask, a playful tone to your voice. 

You watch his eyes flick down to take in your appearance, his chest growing as he sucks in a deep breath, “Oh, you know…had to get something,” he pauses, shrugging his shoulders a bit. “Did you make up your mind?”

You bite your lips together as you open the door a little wider, “Mmm, I thought about it…”

He steps forward, his foot on the threshold, “And?”

You instantly reach for his shirt, pulling him into the room and crashing your lips into his. He immediately takes control, leading you backwards and kicking the door shut with his foot. His hands have found your waist, sliding beneath the silky fabric of your top and gripping into your skin. He backs you into a wall, letting his warm lips drag across your jaw as his hands continue to explore the soft skin of your stomach. It’s not long before his lips are back on yours, the taste of alcohol still lingering on his tongue. 

His knee slides between your legs, parting them just enough to be able to press himself closer to you. Your arms lace around his neck, your hands tangling into his soft hair, as his hips press into yours. The sound of your lips on his is wet and desperate, the two of you devouring each other where you stand. His tongue slides into your mouth in search of yours, the two of you quickly picking up where you last left off. 

You can feel his phone vibrating in his pocket as it presses against your leg, an incessant buzz that drags your attention away from his lips. 

“You wanna get that?” you ask, whispering against his lips. 

“No,” he growls, his teeth nipping at your bottom lip. “Probably the groupchat, I’m tired of them interrupting.”

He pulls the two of you from against the wall, walking you backwards towards the bed as his lips pepper kisses up and down your jaw. He tosses you down towards the bed, the fluffy white sheets pooling around your body. His eyes are hazy as he looks down at you, his cheeks still red from what you thought was the cold, but now know is the alcohol flowing through his system. His chest is heaving as he stares down at you, taking in every single inch of your body. You can feel the primal need radiating from him, and you remind yourself to thank Ruth for not letting your change into something else. 

You can hear that his phone is still buzzing, and with a huff of aggravation he pulls it from his pocket and taps on the screen a few times before throwing it onto the nightstand. He drops to his hands, hovering over you as his shirt hangs from his body. You keep your eyes locked on his as you unbutton the buttons, letting your hands run up his stomach and over his chest. 

His lips drop back down to yours, this kiss a little slower and a little more intentional, you can feel that he wants you, and you hope he can tell that you want him just the same. He hums against your lips, the evidence of his need starting to show through in his voice. You let your hands push the fabric of his shirt over his shoulders and he assists by tossing it to the floor. His necklaces hang between the two of you, the pendants cold as they rest against your chest. 

His hand comes up to swipe at the thin strap of your tank top, pulling it delicately over your shoulder while letting his eyes meet yours. You nod your head just enough to give him permission, letting him repeat the action with the other side. 

He brings his palm to rest on the side of your neck, his fingertips brushing lightly against your skin before he drags his palm down your body, pushing the soft black fabric down your chest. 

“This what you wanted?” he hums, dragging his fingertips over your sternum. “When you sent me that little picture? Wanted to get me all worked up thinking about you in this? Thinking about you, out of this?”

Your nipples harden just at the sound of his voice, deep and rich, a gentle slur from the alcohol. He is pure sex as you look up from beneath him.

“Might’ve been…” you answer, biting your bottom lip nervously. 

“Don’t do that,” he says, pulling your lip with his thumb. “Own it. Take what you want.”

A smirk is planted on his lips, his hair hanging around his face as he looks down at you. You decide to do exactly what he says, reaching down to the hem of your top and pulling it up and over your shoulders. His eyes drop down to your chest, now completely exposed to him, the lust almost visible in his dark eyes.

“Shit…” he breathes, his tongue wetting his lips.

He slots his knee between your legs, crawling forward a little bit more and dropping down to his elbows over top of you. His lips connect with your chest, sucking a long wet kiss into the roundness of the skin. You squirm beneath him, the feeling of his lips on your body more than you can handle in the moment. He drags his lips down your body, stopping as he meets the hem of your shorts. 

“Smell so fucking good…You’re so soft, everywhere… Have half a mind to have you like this,” he pants, pressing his lips to your skin again.

“Come back,” you plead, needing to feel his lips on yours.

He moves quickly, grabbing your face with his hand and pressing his lips to yours. You reach between the two of you, your hand unbuckling his belt and unbuttoning the button on his pants. He groans as your hand slips into the waistband of his boxers, gently grazing the stubbly trimmed hair at his base. His eyes flick open to meet yours, almost as if he is surprised you’re doing what he told you to do. You stare at him, waiting for him to tell you to stop, but he doesn’t. You have the answer you need. 

You press further, reaching for him, but surprisingly finding him still mostly soft. His eyes widen a little, and his head drops just a touch. You can tell he knows, and it’s caught him a little off guard. 

You decide to take matters into your own hands, smiling back at him, “Roll over.”

He looks up, a small grin on his lips as he rolls to his back, landing in the empty spot you photographed earlier. You move to place yourself between his legs, reaching for the top of his pants and pulling them and his boxers down over his legs. He kicks them off and you toss them to the floor, taking in the sight of him completely naked in front of you. His chest is heaving as he looks at you, a grin on his shiny pink lips as he watches you slide your hands up his thighs. 

“I know I already told you this, but you’re so fucking pretty I can’t seem to think straight.”

You can feel your cheeks grow hot, the way he’s looking at you and the words falling from his mouth have your heart pumping harder than it has in years. 

“And god when you blush like that, fuck…”

You crawl forward a bit more, positioning yourself over him to straddle his waist. You lower yourself to a sitting position, letting him guide your hips to rest your body weight where he wants it. His hands grip into your hips, sliding under the silky fabric still covering your lower half. His thumbs rub circles into your hip bones, your hips rolling on their own accord against his. A hum leaves his chest as his eyes flutter closed, clearly enjoying his view and the feeling of you beneath his hands. 

You reach for his hand, grabbing his wrist and guiding his palm to rest over your chest, letting his fingers grip into the soft fullness beneath it. He palms at your breast as you continue to rock your hips over his. His mouth opens just a bit as he focuses on you, slowly bringing his other hand to rest over your other breast. His grip is firm and warm, not too rough. A hum of pleasure leaves his lips every few seconds as he drinks in the moment, but still yet he is considerably soft beneath you. 

You lean forward into his hands, letting your lips brush against his neck, your tongue darting out and licking a wet stripe up the column of his neck. His grip tightens and his hips buck upward into yours. You’ve got him where you want him now. 

You pull away from him, moving backwards on the bed until you are hovering right above his dick. Your eyes flick to his, dark and boiling over with want as you lower your face closer to him. You grab him in your hand, feeling that he is still not truly hard enough to do anything with, but you still had a few more ideas yet. 

“Can I?” you breathe, whispering the words against his soft pink tip. You bat your eyes at him, “Please?”

You watch his chest rising and falling quickly, his heart rate sky high as he watches you. “Been dreaming about it.”

You let your tongue glide over his tip, warm against your mouth as your eyes stay locked on his. You wrap your fist around his base and let your mouth sink down over him, running your tongue up the underside of his shaft. You can’t help but wonder why he isn’t rock hard at this point, his body giving you every single cue that he wants you, apart from this one. 

His hand swipes the hair away from your face as you take him, feeling him growing just the slightest bit harder as his tip grazes the back of your mouth. You pull off of him just enough to speak, letting your wet lips brush his tip. “That okay?”

“Yes, fuck yes, I just–”

You grip your hand into his thigh as you shush him, “Shhh, I know, I’m not done.”

You take him down again, bobbing your head back and forth at a steady pace as his breathing starts to pick up. His skin is clammy under your hands and his chest is heaving as he watches you take him as far as you can. 

Your brain starts to wander as you taste him, his natural musky smell translating to the taste of his skin. Maybe he drank too much? Or maybe you’re just bad at this. He should be hard by now. Maybe he doesn’t really want you like you thought. 

A groan leaves his lips and his hips buck up, forcing him further down your throat. “Fuck…”

Okay, that's definitely not it. He has been falling all over you for days, it has to be something else. 

His hand grips into your hair as his hips buck upwards again. “Feel so fuckin’ good baby, shit. Perfect little mouth, knew it would be.” 

You let your eyes flick up to his, staring at him as his tongue rests between his lips. He’s trying, you can tell, but for some reason, it’s just not working. His brow furrows in anger, and you watch as his demeanor shifts, frustration taking him over. 

You pull off him, his dick harder than when you started, but still fairly soft. You don’t know how hard he normally is, but it has to be more than this. Right?

“Jake, we don’t have t–”

He shakes his head, “Mmm, you know what? Come up here beautiful, come lay down for me.”

You do as he says, part of you sad to think that maybe you weren’t doing it for him, but you push the thoughts aside, swapping places with him as he adjusts the pillow beneath your head. He bends to kiss you, pulling away for just a second before pressing his lips to yours again much quicker. 

“So fucking pretty, all of you. But especially that mouth,” he smirks. 

He hooks his fingers into your shorts, pulling them and your panties off in one swift movement. You are bare before him, his eyes widening as he takes you in, finally getting a reaction from his dick. He fists it up and down a few times as he looks at you, “Can I touch you, baby?”

You nod quickly, letting him spread your legs apart with his free hand. A growl leaves his chest as he sucks his bottom lip into his mouth, “So gorgeous, shit…”

His thumb swipes up through your wetness, circling your clit a few times causing you to squirm beneath him. 

“Jake…” you gasp. 

His eyes meet yours, “Yeah? You like that? You’re so beyond wet, sweetheart.”

Your hips twist and turn beneath his touch, every angle proving to be more stimulating than the last. You whine, a string of curses and muffled versions of his name falling from your lips. 

“You…” he pauses, taking a deep breath, “Are everything I thought you would be. More, even.”

“Jake, please, I– I need–”

He pulls away from you quickly, his hand still fisting his cock as he reaches for his wallet on the floor. He pulls a condom from the pocket inside, tearing the foil packet open as he kneels back onto the bed. 

“Let me!” you urge, stopping his wrist, “I mean, please, can I do it?”

His eyes flick up to yours in surprise, “Yeah baby, you can do it. You can do whatever you want, swear to god.”

You grab the latex between your fingers, pinching the tip and rolling it over his cock. It's hard enough now that putting the condom on is fairly easy, but you’re positive he was even harder than this in the bathroom last night. You roll it to his base, letting your hand drift back up and over his chest before circling it around his neck. His hands grip your waist as his lips meet yours again, his tongue circling with yours as he moves you back towards the pillows, gently lowering your body to the bed. “Want you so bad, Y/N.”

“So have me,” you breathe, barely letting your lips leave his. 

You welcome him between your legs, feeling his hand reach down to fist his base, gliding himself through your wetness. In only a matter of a minute his dick is softer than it was, and both of you know it, but neither of you are willing to acknowledge it. 

His phone starts to buzz on the nightstand, both of you looking towards it. He doesn’t pay it any mind, letting it buzz on the wooden table until it stops. 

“Look at me, baby, don’t mind that,” he demands. 

You feel him press his tip to your entrance, his eyes fixed on yours. He furrows his brow as he presses his hips forward, but you feel nothing. Your eyes flick down between the two of you, finding that he can’t seem to get hard and stay hard enough to get it in. You feel a pang of hurt run through your chest, almost like rejection, but somehow a little worse. 

“Jake, are you not hard en–”

“Just give me a second, I don’t know what the fuck is going on,” he growls, his attention turning to the still buzzing phone on the nightstand. 

“I mean, I can give you head again if you think–”

“No, Y/N, I just– I just need a second, I’ll be fine,” he says. You can hear the anger in his voice, not at you, but at himself. 

“Is it me?” you ask, running your fingers up his arm that is next to your head. 

“Fuck no. You are everything I want, wet as fuck and gorgeous, no, it’s not you. I want you, I really fucking want you,” he says, stroking himself a few more times. “Alright…”

He repositions himself at your entrance, and this time you can feel him, he’s harder now, enough to slide into you, but still it’s only just enough to slip inside. 

Even half hard he is bigger than the last guy you were with, the stretch as he presses into you making that abundantly clear.

“Oh Jesus Christ, you are so tight,” he pants, his dick hardening a little at the tight fit. 

You slide your hands around his waist, pulling him down a little further as he starts to move his hips, “Oh goddamn…”

His phone buzzes twice on the nightstand as he starts to pump into you at a steady pace, but you ignore it, letting the overwhelming feeling of him moving inside of you take precedence in your brain. 

He groans through closed lips, his brow furrowed in concentration as he slides in and out of you. He rolls his hips as he thrusts into you, a whine leaving your lips as your back arches. 

“Motherfuck, you are–” he stops, regaining his composure, “Tightest fuckin’ pussy.”

Your hands grip into his sides as he picks up speed, his hips slamming into yours as both of you start to lose yourselves in the moment. Finally things felt normal, things felt good, way too good. You wanted this, you needed this, and fuck if he wasn’t checking every box you’d ever had. 

He cups your cheek in his hand, dusting his thumb over your swollen lips just as you part them to suck it in. You watch his eyes roll back in his head as he starts to pant, and you can tell he is dangerously close to his finish. 

You start to speak, ready to change positions but as you open your lips to release his finger, his phone rings, buzzing quickly across the table as the sound plays through the speakers. 

“God fucking damnit!” he growls, “What the fuck!”

“Take it Jake, it’s fine, just– answer and they’ll leave you alone.” you urge, looking to the black phone skittering across the table. 

“No, fuck no.” he snaps, his hips emphasizing his point. “I’m busy,”

The buzzing stops, and he looks back to you, letting his hand drift down to your chest. He rolls your nipple between his fingers, letting his lips meet yours. His kiss is wet, and desperate, his hips starting to falter as they move in messy strokes above you. 

You can tell he needs to cum, his body racing closer and closer with every half hard stroke of his dick. You can also tell he is fighting it, his face is red, and his hairline sweaty. You know it will be seconds, if that, until he is tumbling into his release.

His eyes flick to yours in panic, an almost apologetic look on his face as he breathes, “Baby, I’m, fuck—”

As if right on cue, his phone starts to buzz, the ringtone blaring through the speakers as his hips stutter, slamming into you again as he looks at his phone on the table. His head snaps back to you, sucking in a deep breath of panic as his hips stop, his cock twitching inside you as he fills the condom with a guttural moan. 

The fucked out look that takes over his face is like nothing you’ve ever seen. Reminiscent of a Renaissance painting, the features of his face twist into such a blissful expression that he almost looks like he’s in pain. He’s beautiful, there is absolutely no doubt about that, but it doesn’t change the fact that he just came, way, way too soon. 

You are in shock as you lay beneath his panting body, feeling him grow soft inside you once again. He pushes up to his hands nearly instantly, his face riddled with remorse as he realizes what exactly just happened. “Y/N–”

His phone buzzes again, for what has to be the sixtieth time in the last five minutes, a snap of anger washing through you. “Are you going to fucking get that?”

He mumbles a curse under his breath as he pulls out of you, the condom full as he looks at it in shame. He covers himself with his hand as he snatches the phone off of the nightstand and makes his way to the bathroom. You can feel the embarrassment swirling through the air as you hear the sink in the bathroom turn on. 

You grab the sheet at your feet and pull it up over your naked, unsatisfied body, trying to wrap your head around what exactly just happened. You try to catch your breath, the sound of your breathing filling the room but quickly drowned out by Jake’s phone ringing. This time though, he answers. 

“Hello?!” he shouts, his anger apparent. “Yeah I’ve seen him fucking calling, I have been busy goddamnit!” 

You hear the sink turn off and the toilet flush, followed by the sound of his footsteps walking back into the room. “Yes, I will call him, Jesus Christ, don’t ever blow my shit up like that again,” he snaps, ending the call. He pauses as he walks, a hand towel in his grip as he taps his phone screen.

You hear another call ringing out, but this time he's the one doing the calling. He walks over to you with the phone on speaker phone, a look of sadness on his face as he slowly approaches the edge of the bed. He sits next to you and reaches for your hand just as the person answers. 

“Hey, man, been trying to call you.” the man's voice says, a tone of urgency present.

“Yeah, sorry about that, I was caught up for a second. What’s up, what’s going on?” Jake answers, rubbing his hand along your arm. 

He turns to look at you mouthing ‘guitar tech’ as he hands you the damp towel. You make quick work of it, wiping yourself off but knowing you’ll be taking a shower as soon as possible. You throw it across the room as he snickers, waiting for Johnny to answer.

“Listen man, I’m at the venue, trucks just arrived and we are doing load out. One of the stage left Marshall cabinets split in transit. Wiring harness is fucked. Amp is…the amp is not looking good man.”

You see Jake stiffen, “What?” 

“Huge gash in the backside, must have fallen or something, I tried to fuck with the wiring as best as I could, it’s not getting any signal right now, man.”

“Holy fuck,” he groans, standing quickly from the bed and gripping into his hair. “No signal? Did you try a direct line in?”

You cut your eyes wondering how he managed to sober up so quickly in the last three minutes.

“Yeah, even DI there’s no signal, just static. Powers’ on, but she’s DOA. Gonna have Mark take a look at it too, but I don’t have high hopes,” he continues. 

“Is there anything we can do? How the fuck are we supposed to get a replacement amp and cabinet by tomorrow?” Jake asks, his voice laced with panic. 

“We can make some calls, I know a guy with some leads. What are the chances of you coming down here to take a look at it? Maybe I’m completely missing something, man. Hoping it's a quick fix. Need your signature for the insurance waiver, too.”

“Can it wait until morning?” he asks, a pained look on his face. 

“Probably shouldn’t, especially if we are looking for a replacement locally.”

He turns to look at you, and you can tell he is conflicted. You bite your lips together and nod your head. This is his job after all. 

He runs a hand over his face, letting out a sigh, “Yeah, yeah, I um– I can be there in a bit. I just need to wrap something up here, and I’ll be there. See if you can get in touch with Hamstead, I’m sure they have a loaner we could use for tomorrow at the very least.”

“Will do man, hey sorry about this, I don’t know what happened, maybe it wasn't strapped down or–”

Jake is quick to cut him off, “It’s fine, not your fault. I’ll see you soon, okay?”

“Yep, see you then,” he says, ending the call. 

He tosses his phone on the nightstand before dropping his head into his hands. “This night has been…”

He turns to look at you, letting out a sigh, “I don’t know what the fuck it’s been, fuck, I just…”

You can tell he is flustered, he can hardly form a sentence. “Listen, I get it. It’s fine, just go do what you need to do. It’s okay, really.”

He nods as he stands up from the bed, walking around the front to start grabbing for his clothes. He doesn’t say much as he dresses, and he will hardly look at you. You don’t really know why, but you can imagine he is feeling a little bad about himself and his performance at the moment. You still haven't let yourself process what exactly happened with the two of you just now, but you will, soon. 

He re-buttons his shirt, pulling his hair up into a hair tie as he lets out a sigh, “Look, I’m sorry about this. I really am, this is the absolute very last thing I want to do right now, especially after… that. But I have to, and I don’t want you to think that I want to because–”

“Jake. I get it. Just go, it’s fine,” you say calmly, hoping he will believe you. 

He grabs his phone and his wallet and shoves them into his pants pocket, kneeling on the bed towards you. He leans in to kiss you, but his lips don’t land on yours, instead missing your mouth completely. A new rush of secondhand embarrassment washes through you, and right now you think him leaving is probably the best thing he could do. 

He curses himself as he stands up shaking his head in defeat as he swallows back his embarrassment. He walks towards the door with a hand in his pocket, turning to you just before stepping out,  “I’ll uh…I’ll text you, I guess, I don’t know, fuck. Have a good night, Y/N.”

The door slams behind him and suddenly the room is silent. No heavy breathing, no pitchy moans, and no ringing phones. Just pure silence. 

You stare at the wall for a full five minutes, the muted TV flashing colors against your skin. You can’t conjure a thought. Not a single one. Nothing other than what the fuck was that?

You want to call Ruth. You want to call her and tell her everything, but you also don’t even know what you would say. Something like ‘Hey Ruth, just had the worst two minutes of sex of my life? Oh did I mention he was barely hard? And I couldn’t get him hard? And that his phone rang the entire time? And that he came in two minutes? And I didn’t finish at all? And then he had to leave as soon as he finished? And now I’m sitting alone and naked in my hotel room?’  Yeah, you needed to sit on this one for a minute. Your eyes catch sight of the flower laying on the dresser, now looking a little bit limp and lifeless but still beautiful no less. You feel a pang run through your chest, tearing your eyes away from it so as not to taint that moment earlier with this one. 

You rip the sheets from your body and make your way to the bathroom, turning the shower on as hot as it will go before stepping inside. You let the steaming hot water clear your mind and ease your tense muscles, washing away the scent of his cologne that is lingering on your skin. 

You wrack your brain for answers, though you can hardly come up with anything that makes sense. There’s just no fucking way he is actually terrible in bed. We had so much chemistry, the electricity between us was nearly electrocuting you. He felt so good last night. We were so in sync last night. This had to be a fluke, right? You’ve seen him with his guitar on stage, where was that?!

You lather your skin in your body wash, rinsing away the remaining evidence that this night ever happened. After the best afternoon with him, why was he so off tonight? He barely seemed like himself. Maybe he really did have too much to drink. 

You tried to put yourself in his shoes. If the roles were reversed and it was your phone blowing up like that, you probably would have been a little distant too. But that didn’t explain why he couldn’t stay hard. That was a mystery to you, and you really hoped to god it was the beers and not you. You know he was so much harder last night, you know he was. You felt it. So what happened between last night and tonight? 

Something. You knew that much. 

You turn off the water and wrap yourself in a towel, letting your mind wander with possibilities, trying to convince yourself that what he showed you tonight was not who he really was. You sat back down on the bed you just shared with him, thinking back to that few seconds where things were good. And it was good, it felt good, he felt good. There was no denying those few seconds. But the rest of it, well, that was still up for debate. 

You grab your phone and tap the screen, the display reading 1:02AM. There are no texts from Jake, though you didn’t really know what you expected him to say.

From the little you know about him, when he left here tonight the confidence he naturally exudes was gone, not even in the same building. You knew he would reach out, but only when he was ready and knew what to say. But until then… 

You toss your phone on the bed next to you, quickly changing into a clean pair of pajamas and curling back up into the bed. You lay there staring at the ceiling trying to figure out how you are going to handle things tomorrow. You would be with him the entire day, and you didn’t want to make him feel worse than he likely already did. 

You go back and forth with yourself until you land on something sturdy: You won’t say anything, you won’t do anything. You’ll act completely normal. The same as you have for the last few days. You decide to tear this page from the book and move forward. This never happened. 

Deep down you know there was something holding him back from being fully present with you tonight, but what that is you’ve yet to discover.

—

JAKE POV

The early morning finds you facedown on your bed, still fully clothed, one boot kicked off into the floor, the other still completely on your foot. The sun is far from being up, and you’re thankful that you still have a few hours before its rays beat in through your window. The bustle of the awakening city is loud on the streets below you, and you find yourself wanting nothing more than to stay in this exact position for the rest of the day. For the rest of your life, actually. Maybe, if you bury yourself under these blankets and pillows, everyone will forget about you. Isla will forget about you. Y/N will forget about you, about everything, about last night. It will be like it never even happened. It will be like the most amazing buildup to what could have been a night of pure electricity didn’t take an absolute nose dive into one of the most embarrassing things to have ever happened to you. You’d take tripping on stage a million times over this. Pure. Humiliation.

Yeah, right here, in this bed. Under the pillows. They can’t find you here. 

What the fuck even happened?! Whiskey dick was an understatement. It didn’t even begin to explain what you…experienced. Unable to perform for the most beautiful new thing that has happened to you. Everything was perfect, she was perfect… her confidence was enamoring, her head was off the charts good, and fuck, for the few seconds you had things actually going, it was pure ecstasy. She was soaked for you. Her sounds, her face… fuck. It all came flooding back to your brain, even the way she smelled still stuck in your mind. She wanted you, just as badly as you wanted her. Just the thought of it had you standing at attention all over again, at full force this time, though. And you’d let her down. 

You sit up and roll yourself over. “Where the fuck were you last night, huh? Let me the fuck down!” you audibly yell at what was happening in your still-belted jeans. You force your face back into the comforter, realizing now that a horrific hangover is on the horizon. Your head is busting in two already, not like you already didn’t feel like shit on a boot.

Staying here, under the pillows until sound check. Right here. Not moving. Hiding. 

You know that’s not realistic, though. You contemplate texting her, but what the fuck do you even say? You couldn’t even satisfy her, and ended up satisfying yourself, way too fucking soon. What had you lasted, two minutes? Three max? Like a fucking 16 year old kid. God, what a fucking tool. She probably thinks you’re a horrible lay. You know you’re better than that. 

You groan hard into the sheets below you, feeling the metallic taste of a hangover in your mouth. You need a gallon each of water, orange juice, and black coffee, stat. And probably like, nine pieces of the butteriest toast you can find. And probably a shower, yes, a shower. And a straightjacket, for how absolutely insane you feel. 

Damnit, the amp. Luckily, the rental was in the works of being en route last night, so you feel just a little bit better about that, at least. It won’t be your baby, but it will sound okay. 

You roll and find your almost-dead phone underneath your chest, blinking your eyes as the screen brightens. Nothing. Not even Isla. Good. No one wants you. You can stay here, hidden in your burrow, until you absolutely can’t anymore. 

You’ve gotta say something, anything to her, to start this process that you want to stay millions of miles away from. But the first step to healing is admission, so you go ahead and take it. 

You

5:31AM: I’m sorry. 

You watch as the message is delivered to her, seeing the string of foreplay texts and her photo still sitting in the chat. She’s so gorgeous, how could you have fucked up this badly? Your first chance to show her how you feel and you fumble this hard?

Though there were many factors playing into it, at the very deepest darkest part of your mind, you know why. You know exactly why. Guilt isn’t an emotion you let yourself feel very often, and this morning, you find yourself grasped in the wrath of it. The double-edged sword of your current situation with two separate women is proving to be more intertwined than you’d anticipated, or even foresaw. What you want is clear, though. And you’re determined to get a second chance, no matter how rocky and uncomfortable the road to that chance may be. 

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[myownparadise96]

Hello!  Welcome to Chapter 7.2 and the Epilogue of CD&FE.  

Pairing: Jake X Female Reader 

Summary: This is an AU that starts with the release of GVF’s first EP, Black Smoke Rising, and follows along life paths over the course of twenty plus years.

Content warnings: A return to smut.  They are reunited and it’s like fireworks.  So, please be aware - mentions of alcohol, adult emotions and relationships, sex, oral, fingering, p in v, maybe some spanking, hair pulling maybe, anal play, language, strong language, you get the picture. Oliver Fucking Reed also makes a 30 second appearance.

Word Count: approx. 6.3K 

It’s here!  The end.  These two - @edgingthedarkness and @takenbythemadness have been so supportive through this whole bit.  Thank you one last time, ladies.  Love you.  And THE scene is finally here.  We were cackling over pet names during sex until it just fucking worked and we all just did a collective “holy shit”.  

CD&FE, Part 7.3:  Jake POV      

      I almost missed the final bow.  Josh belted out for me to stop as I was pretty much racing towards the stairs.  I knew I was rushing, but fuck that.  I had a flight in ninety minutes.  Randal promised he would have a car with my bag and my acoustic waiting and at the ready.  Somehow, he was able to get me on an earlier flight.  My whole mind was set on getting to Y/n.  The daily texts were not enough.  I needed her.  Now.  I needed to know that we were going to finally try.  

      The others were doing their post-show bickering and critique while I handed off my guitar and walked as fast as my rubbery legs could carry me towards the dressing rooms.  I could hear them calling for me, but I didn’t bother.  I was stripped out of my jacket and was kicking out of my boots by the time I shoved my way into my dressing room.  I had laid out clothes ahead of time.  I sped through cleaning up.  God that was a hot show.  I was a complete mess of nerves and stink as I washed.  All I could think of was how I was going to have to really sprint to get to the gate and make the flight.  It was worth it.  I would be at her door well before breakfast.  That was the goal.

      Towel wrapped around me and trying like hell to squeeze the water from my hair, I was startled by a knock on the door.  I grumbled out a ‘do not disturb’, but I knew the moment the door opened, it was my mom.  

      “Mom - what -”

      “Sorry honey,”  she started as I grabbed my clothes and moved back into the shower stall to dress.  “I know you’re rushing but I have a huge favor to ask of you.”

      “Come on, Mom,”  I grumbled, yanking my pants on.  “I was able to get an earlier flight.  I’m leaving.”    

       “I think this one is important,”  she said as I smashed my elbow into the wall in my effort to pull my shirt across my wet head.  “I met her during the set.  She’s a huge fan.  Such a sweet girl.”

       I glared at her as I walked back out to try to put myself together.  “Mom, we’ve talked about this.  We can’t do these meet and greets just because someone approaches you.  The managers…”

      “I know, I know.  But this one is different.”

      “You say that all the time,”  I quipped as I started dragging a brush through my hair.  “But seriously I have… 84 minutes until I’m in the air.  You know-”

       “But this one-”

       “Mom!”

       A look crossed her face that I had not seen since I was maybe sixteen.  Well, twenties, but really?  She opened the door and leaned out.  I knew she called for my dad.  Damn it.  Sure as shit, two seconds later there he was - with his stern ‘How could you do this?’ look plastered all over his face.

      “Jake.”  One word.  One syllable.  And I found myself back to being their child.  

      “I’m forty two years old. When does this shit end?”  I griped as I threw my stage clothes on hangers to be washed.

      “Never,”  my mother replied with a raised eyebrow.

      I relented if it meant they would get out of my dressing room.  I threw the rest of my personals into the waiting backpack and looked around for anything that I may have missed.  In the history of me trying to get shit done so I can leave, this moment was probably the fastest I’ve ever moved.  There was still a chance that I could dodge the fan thing.  Mom did, after all, forget to tell me where to go.  Or had I just not heard.  Didn’t matter.  Out the door and I immediately turned towards the loading bay.

      “Jacob!  Over here!”

      Fuck.  I had been caught.  When I turned towards them, I may have been scowling.  Mom did that thing with the fingers drawing the corners of her mouth into a smile and everything.  Was it too much to ask to get on a damn plane and get to this woman that I…  Loved.  I loved her.  Every thread of my being loved her.  Craved her.  Desired her.  But not just the sex.  It was like we were two pieces of the same map that needed no stitching to be together.  I drew out my phone and held up two fingers, mouthing to her as I passed by - two minutes.

      Everyone was in the banquet style family room.  Odd.  Josh was still bouncing around in his jumpsuit like he was plugged directly into an amp.  There was family all over the place, but it felt off.  I couldn’t identify the sensation beyond it being like a dream.  Everyone was glancing and looking at me but not really acknowledging me.  The frustration of time slipping away ate at my edges and started to piss me off.  I didn’t have the time for this shit and trying to track down a ‘fan’ was not my priority.  We were nearly through to the back side of the room when I threw in the towel.

      “Mom!  I don’t have the time for this shit!”  I blurted out, turning around as she began to argue.

       I was expecting her to really lay into me, but her words were nonexistent.  My gaze first fell on my dad as he was in front of the door, an overly cocky look on his features.  Just before him was Y/n, a shy smile and soft rock from side to side betrayed her unsureness of the moment.  My jaw dropped open and my guts spilled to the floor.  It was like the first time to Disney World, the first time playing Madison Square Garden, and seeing her for the first time ever all rolled into one.  The breath in my chest turned to fire as I felt my mom’s hand land on my back.

       “So totally your girl, Jacob,”  she whispered.

       I struggled through an exhale in a frail attempt to not break down.  “How do you know?”

      “Because Dad still looks at me the way you look at her, forty five years later,”  she said with a gentle push at my shoulder.  “Stop trying to be cool.  We all know it’s about to get mushy in here.”

      At her warm laughter, I found myself untethered from the ground and moving towards her.  All I could see was her and the glint in her eye that was my beacon.  I blinked and she was in my arms.  I blinked again and her lips were on mine.  I didn’t bother to listen to the whoops and hollers that were happening around us.  Fuck that.  The moment was all us.  I felt like I was being stretched and pulled and smashed and pummeled all at the same time.  The sound of her filled me like nothing else.  All I wanted to do was drag her back to the hotel…

      “Oh, shit,”  I whispered.  “I don’t have a room.”

      My hands came down on her hips as she started to step away.  I didn’t need her to move - at all.  It was like she instantly was the air that I needed to breathe.  The grin on her lips as she took me in made my heart quiver.

      “I gave up my room.  I’m supposed to be on a damn plane in-”

      She laughed as she cupped my cheek.  “I have a room.”

      I leaned into her touch.  Life went on around us. I was locked into her and unable to get past it.  I watched as she slipped her hand into mine and pulled it close to her chest.

      “Should we get out of here?”  she asked, a faint blush grew across her cheeks as she looked around at my family as if becoming aware of so many eyes on us.

       “Yeah.  Feeling a little weird with everyone around,”  I sighed with a backwards look at Mom.

       Dad was at her side, both grinning like idiots at us.  I felt like we were at a wedding - that part where everyone suddenly is ready for the couple to race away to get laid, or whatever.  

      “Where the fuck is Randall?”  I suddenly asked, formulating a plan from the ashes of my previous one.

       I located the assistant and was able to get the car to take us to the hotel.  He was also gracious enough to change the plane ticket for me - adding one for her for the next evening.  Perfect.  It was perfect.  I could barely keep my hands from her as we fumbled our way up to her room on the third floor, oddly enough just down the way from my  previous suite.  Nice.

      I fell against her as the post show exhaustion caught up with me.  We slowly made love, accepting it was all I was up to as every ounce of my frame started to ache.  I fell asleep with my cheek on her chest and her hands in my hair.  When I woke up alone, I panicked until I heard her moving around at the bathroom vanity.  An idea came to my brain as I slid out from under the tangled up sheets.  I was half hard by the time I saw her in the reflection of the huge mirror.  I caught her hips as she started to turn my direction.

      “Think you can keep your leg hiked up on that counter, mouse?”  I asked, as I gently pulled her right thigh up to rest her foot on the edge of the long, low slung vanity.

       I wasn’t really paying attention to her answer, just her wide spread pussy that had already started to weep just for me.  I trailed my fingers across the miles of skin of her leg going right to her center.  My eyes traced up to hers in the mirror as I passed a barely there touch to her clit.  The way her eyes widened for a moment made me grin.  I watched my fingers go to work against her folds and nub.  It didn’t take long before she was dripping against my skin and down her thigh.  Her head flopped back, and I made sure my shoulder was there for support.  I kissed along her neck just like I knew it would make her fall apart all the faster.  I hummed as I found the pulse point and she buried her teeth in her lip with a dull whine.  

       “Spray for me, mouse,”  I whispered against her cheek.  “Give it to me.”

       Her hands wrapped back across my hips for support.  She looked amazing with me wrapped around her, lips hung open and the sound...  Goddamn her sounds were making my cock ache something fierce.  I shifted, pressing into the small of her back as I tugged her open all the more.  I slid two fingers into her and was rewarded with a raspy moan that filled every inch of my skin with heat.  My palm filled with her as she hosed down her leg.  Her frame shook hard with her pleasure that I pumped her through hard.

       “Put your hands on the counter,”  I whispered as I kissed down her spine.

       I placed a sloppy kiss on the swell of her ass before sinking my teeth in.  

       “Motherfucker,”  she gasped as I pressed my fingers into her firmly as I tugged my bite to ensure I marked her.

       I lapped at her soaked thigh until I reached her core.  Fuck I missed her taste.  I sucked every inch that I could, savoring all of her.

       “Jake,”  she groaned, pushing her ass back a bit as if moving me to where she needed.

       “Like that?”  I asked before I ground the tip of my nose against her core and nibbled at her clit.

       “Jake,”  she said, this time her voice was off, like in pain.

       I pulled back, trying to catch a glimpse of her in the mirror.

      “Fucking cramp!”  she belted out, her leg coming down off the vanity suddenly and nearly falling back into me.  “Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, fucking hell, ooooooowwwww.”

      I rubbed at her hip and thigh with a grimace.  I apologized profusely as she started to laugh.  Her cheeks were completely blushed out as I helped her to walk back towards the bed.

      “Sorry, sorry!”  she said, hiding her face.  “Oh my god, I can’t believe that just fucking happened!”

      I laughed as I got her to sit down.  “Are you okay?”

     She grimaced something fierce as I pressed my fingers into her thigh where she had been trying to grab and kneed.  I slowly knelt before her, helping her through the steel tightening in her leg.  I bent and planted a kiss on her knee as she blew out a few deep breaths.

      “Better?”  I ask quietly as I look up into her embarrassed face.

      “Yeah,”  she groaned, still trying to hide her eyes.  “I’ll be okay.”

      I smiled at her.  She’s gorgeous even when she is so totally flustered.  I took her hands into mine and leaned back on my heels.  She peeked to find that I was totally soft.  She whispered out a curse as her embarrassment washed across her once more.

     “Just means you gotta work for it,”  I sassed with a raised eyebrow.

     I hummed at the sight of her tongue at the corner of her lips.  She whispered for me to stand up and I was quick to follow her order.  She dragged her hands down my flanks and the fronts of my hips.  She lapped at her lips in a very obvious manner as she hooked my soft length with her thumb.

     “Hmmm,”  she said, her voice full of depth.  “I kind of like ‘em soft for this.”

     She rolled her eyes up to meet mine as she dropped her mouth totally open and fed all of me into her mouth.  Her tongue tickled my balls before she sucked one in, followed by the other.  The sight blew my mind as she vibrated with a giggle.  She dragged her teeth across the ball sack as she slowly let them go with a little bite at the end.

      “Fuck,”  I breathed, practically hunched over her and her dark magic.

      “That didn’t take long,”  she teased before taking my hardening shaft between her lips with a hard pull.

       She pulled me all the way back in and rolled my sack between her fingers.  She bobbed her head a few times before meeting my gaze once more.  She let me go and wiped a line of drool from the corner of her soaked mouth.  It was absolutely obscene the way she sucked at my thigh and pumped my cock.

       “How you gonna fuck me, Jake?”  she hummed before swallowing me down again.  “You gonna treat me like an angel?  Be all gentle and sweet like you did last night?”

       My jaw slacked as she spread my cheeks and passed her fingers across my entrance and twisted her tongue over the tip of my dick.  She was better than porn.  She was better than any other woman. She was mine.

      “Or are you gonna make it hard and rough.  Treat me like a sinner,”  she cooed, working my rim with delicious pressure.  “You gonna fuck me hard into this matress?  Break me.  Ride me.  Fucking mark me?”

       She spat on her finger and pressed beyond the rim to swirl and make me moan like her own whore.  She yanked my cock up to press against my belly while she loved on and bit on my balls and the inside of my thighs.  I nearly shot my load all over her face right there.  She seemed to pick up on it and backed off with a sultry lick from base to tip.  She rained gentle kisses to my belly as she put herself into my hands.

      I grabbed her by the shoulders and pulled her up to her feet with a searing kiss.  She was everything in that moment.  Every moment.  All time.  Everything.  I turned her and pushed her down onto her belly.  I wrapped her hair around my fist as I straddled her thighs.  She lifted her hips just enough to expose her core to me to slip into.

      “You don’t want me to be gentle?”  I asked as I bottomed out nice and slow.

      I exposed her throat with a languid tug on her hair to pull her face away from the mattress.  The way her back strained was sexy.  She was powerful as I stayed buried in her depths.  I saw the red mark already forming beneath my shifting palm on her hip.  I slapped her ass cheek with a wicked speed that made her gasp.

      “Please, more,”  she squeaked.

      I couldn’t help the smirk that pierced my lips.  We explored during our times together.  We were by no means shy about sharing ideas or desires.  But damn if this was a boundary that we had not tested before.  I was hooked.  I slapped her other cheek before pounding myself into her at a fast pace, but shallow, teasing depth.  She growled and tried to look back at me, but I tightened my hold on her hair, keeping her right where she was.

      “Don’t fucking tease me,”  she threatened.

      It sent shivers all the way through my system.  I ate it up like fucking candy and needed more.  Immediately.  I pulled myself from her and parted her legs so I could nestle down between and thrust hard into her before I laid down on top of her.  I held onto her wrists as I pummeled in and out and ground down against her ass.

      “Better, baby?”  I asked with my teeth on her ear.

       “More,”  she moaned.

       “More, what?”  I tested, just to see what she would say.

       Another low, deep moan erupted from her chest as I  pushed through her tight folds and felt her constrict all the way down my length.  “BITCH,”  she growled.  “You’re my fucking Bitch!!”

       I lapped and sucked on her ear with a taunting laugh.  “I’ve been your bitch for two damn decades,”  I sighed.  “Try again, baby.”

       Silence.  But I didn’t let up.  I sucked a mark hard into her throat as I dragged myself nearly completely out and slammed back into her.  The sound of our skin slapping against each other was profane.  I felt her spray as I set into another punishing round.

      “Schnookums!”  she bleated out with a hard laugh.

      “What the fuck is that?”

      I couldn’t help but pause for a second to regroup.  I laughed into her shoulder and she actually snorted.  So sexy.  I threaded an arm across her chest and rolled us over so that she was on top with me still buried deep within.  She sat up and rolled her hips a few times before turning to face me.  God, I loved her form.  The deep cut of her hips, the bounce of her breasts.  

       “You going to try again?”  I asked, shoving my hips up to force another hard connection.

       She practically flailed over as I ground up into her.  I watched as she recovered and leaned over me so we were nose to nose.  She made like she was going to kiss my mouth but instead, hovered just above.

       “Captain.”

       I gasped.  Everything blurred as the singular word set my body on fire and my mind to racing.  I grabbed hold of her hips and rolled us once more so that I could properly fuck into her without mercy.  My gaze locked onto her face as I pounded my hips into hers.  She yanked up her legs to give me full access.  I felt myself turning into a feral being as I ground and slapped my body into her.  

       Her eyes twinkled as she pushed herself up to kiss me hard and pull me down into her.  She repeated ‘captain’ over and over, coaxing whimpers from me that filled the air around her like she commanded my every movement.  It was like that poem, but better - it was her own.  She was panting and chirping and her eyes were glazing over like she was about to… oh goddamn.  I swear her pussy clamped down on me as a cry ripped from her mouth.  Everything on her body froze solid. Her whole body buckled and bowed and shivered with her orgasm.  I couldn’t help but to be dazzled as I shot my load with a sound that poured from my mouth that I had never made before.  My heart was racing in my chest and my breath was blowing against her hair as we tried to hold onto each other.  She cooed and caressed me.  I pressed ghostly kisses across her collarbones as if I could drink those last remnants of the love we just shared to stay drunk on her.

     Stillness.  I listened to her breathe as we dozed pressed against each other.  I trailed my fingers back and forth across her shoulder as I tried to gather my thoughts, my words.  There was too much to say to her at this point.  My throat vibrated with the prettiest of sentiments.  But they remained mute as I just took in the weight of the seconds as they ticked by.

      Her phone chirped an alarm that demanded her attention.  My skin screamed out for her quick return, only to be left disappointed.

      “If we’re going to make that flight, we gotta move,”  she whispered, suddenly keeping her distance.

      I frowned.  I knew she was right.  I knew I had just blown my opportunity to quell the bubble of question that was roasting in my chest.  Somehow, just feeling her presence had been more important.  We found ourselves through showers, dressed and taking the elevator down to the lobby before either one of us spoke again.  It was like all we needed to say was in the linger touches we shared; the long held gazes that accompanied a knowing smile.  Randall had a car waiting for us and we were on our way to the airport in no time at all.  I held her hand against my thigh, but it didn’t seem like enough contact.

      We sat in the gate waiting.  It was then I noticed that in our quietness, there was a resolve.  I watched as she talked to Pat on her phone, but all the while, she was touching me - my arm, my knee, holding onto my hand.  She was in the same space as me.  Just to know that she was real - that this moment was really happening.  The flight was not remarkable.  She dozed on my shoulder the entire way.  I breathed in the trust that she gave over to me.  

      Her new home was the embodiment of her.  It was not unlike the house she had all those years before, but this one felt like her whole life was woven into every fabric, embedded into the paint and bones of the structure.  There was nothing hidden - everything of her was on display.  I carried our bags into her bedroom and she cornered me as I was about to walk back out to her kitchen.  Her lips parted as she leaned close.

      “I love you,”  I whispered as our lips hovered over each other.  “I’ve loved you forever.”

      She planted a soft kiss but then leaned back with her fingers tracing the line of my jaw.  “I claim you my safe harbor, Jake.”

      There it was.  The bubble of questions in my chest calmed.  I knew it wasn’t going to be absolutely perfect, but it would be ours.  We would navigate this - the long stretches of being alone and the times where we could be together.  She had made changes, just the same as I had made changes.  The built in breaks for family would tie in perfectly when she would have to be in the office.  The tour dates where we were on the road, she would be able to follow much more freely, working from whatever faraway hotel we found ourselves tucked in.  It was a balance.  It had been a hard fight for balance, but we did it.  We made it work.  And we flourished because of it.    

Epilogue, Her POV     

     My heart was racing, matching the paces of my steps as I dashed through the terminal of Detroit airport.  I had been waylaid by Spring storms and a client that needed a bit of extra hand holding to see the vision of their event.  I stopped just long enough to pee and to get a text out to Ronnie to meet me at the door.  There was no way in hell I was going to miss the big party.

     I pushed my way out the double slider doors and instantly heard the rumble of the ‘Cuda.  Leave it to my escorts to do this running in style.  The air owned a brittle warmth, like Spring wanted to arrive, but had at least one good snowstorm left in her to give.  I pulled my light jacket closer to my frame as I made it to the curb.  Kelly was quick to step out of the shiny cherry red, deep rumbling 1970 Barracuda.  He pulled me in for a quick hug before making way for me to slide into the backseat like it was a get-away car.  He tossed my bag into the trunk and off we went with Ronnie behind the wheel.

      “How you doin, Papa?”  I cooed as I got myself situated.

      Kelly grinned that infamous Kiszka grin over his shoulder.  His dark sunglasses did little to hide the joy in the man’s face.  “I’m doing amazing, sweets,”  he answered, before he started on the usual round of polite questions to catch up.

      It was already after four in the afternoon.  Ronnie had assured me that they could make it home in under 90 minutes.  Once out on the interstate, she flew that beast of a car much to her father’s delight.  We were serenaded by Kelly’s lovely baritone gravel and Ronnie’s smooth interjections of trills.  The intimidation factor of such blatant and latent talent that coursed through the family was still strong, even eight years down the road.  The best I could do is hum, sorta on key, but they loved me anyway.

      The years with Jake had not been easy, but I could not imagine life any differently.  Sure, we had a lot of bumps and bruises as we tried to figure out our balance - together.  Did we regret the resistance that spanned for so long - at times.  Honestly, I don’t think we had the maturity to survive what we are able to now.  I am able to travel with him many times throughout the year.  He comes home to me during tour breaks.  When possible, we divide time between St. Paul and Nashville, and of course Frankenmuth is still home for his folks and Ronnie.  

      “Drop me off at the hall.  The boys are expecting me,”  Kelly said as we crossed the town line.

      It was going to be a huge covert mission sneaking me in under the Kiszka radar.  Ronnie got us into her driveway and we ran inside, dodging kids and toys and all manner of obstacles.  The show was only a few hours away - One Night Only - A Night of Celebration with Greta Van Fleet was a sold out affair at Fischer Hall.  Josh broached the idea of having an all acoustic set, no openers, just a totally stripped down show with their hometown to celebrate the twins’ fiftieth birthdays.  All funds raised from the tickets were going straight to the music boosters and the Autofest to give back to the town that had so nurtured them while they grew up.  It would be just like it had been way back with them setting up, but there were a few volunteers from their formal road tech crew that made themselves available for the festivities.  

     We had just enough time to snuggle down with the nieces and nephews and have a small supper before getting ready and heading in for the party.  Ronnie and her husband, Ethan, expertly corralled their four kids into the side entrance, taking their residence in the roped off area marked family only.  I made sure to stay hidden as Jake was still texting me to see if I was on the way to at least catch the family events for the next few days.  I just kept assuring him that I would be in by breakfast.  

      “WHAT!”  Sam’s sass filled my ears before I felt his hands on my back.

      “Oh hell,”  I muttered as he turned me around and enveloped me in his embrace.

      “I thought Jake said you wouldn’t be here until tomorrow,”  he babbled, rocking me side to side.

      I tried to shush him, but was buried in his chest.

      “Oh my gawd, wait until he knows-”

      “Sam!  No!”  I barked out, trying to keep my voice down but loud enough to be heard.  “It’s a surprise.”

      The glint that overtook his eyes was endearing.  I could count on him to be quick to figure out the puzzle before him, regardless of his own mindset.  He nodded and seemed to step back, as if blocking the doorway.

      “Are you staying here?”  he asked, waving at hand around the side stage area.  When I nodded, he frowned.  “That won’t do.  He’d totally see you with the family…”

      My heart froze when I heard Josh and Jake coming towards the main staging area.  My eyes must’ve been as big as saucers that Sam somehow mirrored.  He pushed me into the curtains and proceeded to the stage with his brothers.  Danny passed by with a perked eyebrow but instantly was in on the scheme when I held up a finger to my lips, no words necessary.  There were times that I so appreciated that man.  The hall was packed and loud as they settled down onto stools and chairs.  

     “A Very Happy Birthday To US!”  Josh shouted out, beaming out across the audience with a million watts of sunshine.

     I chanced a glimpse out, seeing Jake under the stage lights.  His full silver hair shone around him as he slowly ran his fingers across the frets.  His handsome face was full of concentration as he prepared during Josh’s rambling speech about nice to be home amongst faces of so many friends and family.  He talked about their first show in the hall and their last appearance before things took on a much bigger avenue.  I watched as the corner of Jake’s mouth tugged a bit as if his memories swirled right along with his twin.  Sam and Danny were on either side of them, so as to keep the twins together on their day.

      “There you are,”  Karen whisper-shouted from behind me.

      I grimaced as I turned, hoping not to draw attention as they started to play the opening song.  “Hey, Mom,”  I greeted softly as she pulled me in for a hug.

      “Cake’s here - they’re prepping it up now,”  she said, eyes on her boys.  

      It was not hard to see the pride in her eyes.  Even after all the years, she still loved to see her boys play - didn’t matter if it was to something small like the hall, or huge stadiums.  Her boys.  Her treasures.  We watched, hand in hand, for a stretch.  My spirit calmed as I watched my man play his guitar and wear a smile that made me swoon.  I could hardly believe that I had had eight years with him.  There were times that were still rough, but we were happy.  I was happy.  Jake made every moment count.  I loved the man and was rewarded with the good and bad that made him Jake.  

     Karen tugged at my hand as they were nearing the final few songs.  The plan was that I would help her and Kelly push the cart that held the cake out on the stage to surprise Jake.  I cast one glance back towards him as she led me away.  He radiated absolute joy.  It brought tears to my eyes to see him so filled with happiness.  Kelly wrapped his arm around my shoulders as if he just knew that I was struggling.  He held me close without a word as if knowing that just some quiet was what I needed to get back on my feet.  

      “You ready, honey?”  Karen asked without actually committing her words to anyone - she just put her hands on the rolling cart and took off towards the stage.  

      I looked up at her husband and he just shrugged with a smile as if it was answer enough.  I walked with him, his hand wrapped tight to mine.  They were lingering across a song from the latest album by the time we stepped to the edge of the stage.  Karen, in all her boldness, walked right out there, egging the crowd on for cheers that seemed to wash over the stage with cries of ‘Happy Birthday!’  Jake turned and his gaze froze on me.  For a moment, I struggled for breath as his eyes grew glossy and the corner of his mouth pulled tight with emotion.

      Kelly and Karen were busy lighting candles while Josh, Danny and Sam were bent over causing all sorts of theatrics to distract from how Jake set his guitar to the side and slowly stood up from his stool.  I stumbled forward, totally missing how there were cords everywhere and nearly slammed myself into the back of Kelly.  Yeah.  That would’ve been amazing.  Much to my relief, Jake had his hand out for me to take.  He pulled me into him and kissed me hard as his fingers drifted across my cheek.

      “Happy birthday,”  I whispered as the crowd started to sing the happy birthday song.

      He pressed his lips to mine once more, his fingers soft against my face.  “God, you’re beautiful,”  he said softly, his eyes were slow to open as he leaned into me.

      The catcalls and wolf whistles commenced as he kissed me again and his parents finished lighting the massive amount of candles.  The hall hushed as it seemed the twins became overwhelmed with emotions.  Josh held out his hand for Jake to take before they bent over to blow out the inferno before them.  Kelly wrapped his arm around Karen as they seemed to fall together in their golden pride for their boys.  The hall erupted in cheers as they laughed over their struggle to get every candle out.  Of course they yukked it up with clutching each other chests in a mock gasp of breath.  

     Jake reached for me once more.  His eyes sparkled as he brought me close.  His gaze made me feel like everyone else evaporated.  He cupped my cheek and kissed me sweetly.  God, I loved this man.  

     I am unsure if I was caught up in the moment, or if it was the right time, but I leaned into him as he folded me into a tight hug.  The others were already getting back to their stools and Karen and Kelly were pushing the cart away.  I took in a deep breath and whispered a word I never thought I would say willingly.

     “Husband.”  The word clawed its way from my mouth, but it was honest in the moment.  My eyes met his and my chest swelled with emotions as he seemed to realize what was happening.  “I’d like to call you husband, Jake.”

     He paused.  He literally paused all of his movements and just stood there holding me.  I just about started to panic, wondering instantly if I had overstepped.  He kissed the spot just below my ear.  I caught sight of those warm, dark eyes as he pulled away from me.  They twinkled with a love that was mine alone.  Every cell inside my body was jolting with the energy he fed me.  He made sure that I made it over the cabling before getting back to his job.  Karen looped her arm with mine as she just beamed radiance towards her family.  

      “Jake!  I know she’s a looker but did you forget we have this thing we gotta do?”  Josh was joking as he was settling back onto his stool with his guitar.

      There were more than a few laughs and I caught how he swayed a bit, shifting into…  “pRicK, you don’t talk about my girl that waaaay,”  he drawled, his smile was a mile wide.

      “Oliver, you said you wouldn’t do this again,”  Josh pretended.  “Remember the last time you tried to pull this - it ended in fire and thankfully no one died, but still.”

       “Yeah well, Jake’s never gotten proposed to, so this is how he answers ‘yes’,”  Jake joked, looking back at me.

       Karen screeched, echoing the crowd.  My everything became flooded with joy as the brothers congratulated him and threw me air kisses.  Our lives had been one meandering string of run-ins that were always filled with passion and a question of love.  These past years only solidified our need for the other.  Soulmates?  Perhaps.  There’s a power in finding the one who truly understands you inside and out.  As he held me on that stage, I knew one thing - this was no longer the fleeting embrace that it once had been.  It was truly a daily celebration of our life together.  And it was a beautiful, beautiful thing to be beholden to.

The End.

I hope you enjoyed CD&FE as much as I enjoyed writing it.  The original story was actually a version of Best Laid Plans that got scrapped and forgotten until it waved like a maniac at me one day and this was formed.  It really was my first reader insert that was multi-chapter, so that was interesting!  Trying it again with my next story The Dead.  I’m a long way from being done with it, but just know I’m working on something.  See y’all soon.

@lvnterninthenight @doodle417 @luverleaver @jakesgrapejuice @fictional-duchess @milkgemini @positivegvfthings @songbirds-sweet @gretavanbitches @gardensgatedaisy @babyhoneygvfarchive @myownparadise96 @josh-iamyour-mama @starcatcherc @loveisonaroll @jakesstarlight @reesetrippingthelight @builtby-gvf @ignite-my-fire @wetkleenex-gvf @gold-mines-melting @starsasone @mysticalstarcatcher @montenegroisr @takenbythemadness @way-to-go-lad @cal-a-bungaa @thewritingbeforesunrise @leftjudgeempathsuitcase @brokenbells11 @imborrowedshesblue @vanfleeter

[myownparadise96]

something something arm something something lips

[myownparadise96]

if there’s one thing jake kiszka is gonna do, it’s look over his right shoulder.

[myownparadise96]

Jake Kiszka x Narrator & Sam Kiszka x OC.

Chapter Four

Summary: The Jones Family are new additions to the sleepy community of Beech Run. A tight knit scattering of rural houses, where everyone knows everyone. Deeply religious and overbearingly strict, the daughters of the family are kept under lock & key by a fanatical Father and submissive Mother. They watch from bedroom windows as their neighbours, The Kiszkas, draw intense curiosity and desire to be free. Madness of youth , hope & obsession collide to bring the danger of forbidden love to poetic ends. (Era A/U)

Warnings: Religious/ Parental trauma. Penetrative p/v sex. Dom/Sub dynamics. Ass play. Oral F/Receiving.

Winter 1985 (Flash forward)

Jake was gone; to begin with. The absence of him echoed all around. Like the vapours of his breath still lingered in the mist, just waiting to be breathed in.

It had been ten days since I last saw him. Standing on the edge of the street where all the Christmas lights twinkled an array of colours I couldn't feel anymore. The rot had set in.

And I'd watched him go. Without a rope to tie around his neck, or mine. Because using it to tether him to me hadn't worked. It was seamless how he disappeared into the density of the encroaching fog. Those reds, greens and blues that ran along the neighbouring windows fading alongside him.

I didn't know quite how profound the loss would be until I realised it was infinite. And suddenly I understood why poets were driven mad.

"Bonnie?"

The rain was lashing against the windscreen. I hadn't noticed. All I could see was the swirls of grey and white of that night he had walked into the road. Forever locked in that moment, never stepping out of it even as I traversed the present moment.

"Yeah?" I replied, turning my head to look at a pair of eyes so painfully similar to his that I couldn't stare for too long.

"We're here." Sam informed me, gesturing towards the blurred image of the church beyond the rainy glass.

I looked down at my hands. Balled up in my lap like I was wringing out a damp cloth.

"I can't do it." I shook my head, adamant that I was going to let roots begin to grow beneath where I sat before I ever got out of the car.

The warmth of a hand on my shoulder snaked over the curve of it from the seat behind me. And the tenderness of it made the tears begin to flow once more.

"Come on." Jolene soothed, "Be strong today, and I promise you can fall apart tomorrow."

~

Summer 1984

Jakes house smelled like beer and fabric softener. There were empty bottles strewn across the kitchen work tops and half eaten bags of chips sitting on the table. He immediately scrambled to try and make the place look more presentable as he opened the door for me.

I was endeared by it. But too tired to really care if the place was tidy or not.

"My Dad." He explained, sliding his arm across the counter in an attempt to gather all the empties into the trash can. "He usually has some buddies around to play poker and jam a little once a week. My Mom usually makes him clear the mess up, I guess he forgot tonight."

None of it felt real. Not the words exchanged in the hospital room or the way my little sister had clung to life with her eyes closed, none the wiser to the heated exchange. I could feel the coil around me tighten, a fear that I had done the wrong thing starting to choke me.

"It's fine, Jake. Really." I assured him, feeling the tears come.

He dropped the trash can and bounded across the kitchen, reaching me in one single heart beat. Fingers wrapping around my shirt, pulling me into his circle. The rush of comfort was overwhelming, doing nothing to stem the flood that was building. But it didn't feel quite so futile once I pressed my face into the curve of his neck.

"Hey, hey..." He soothed, "Everything will be alright, you know that?"

Whatever it meant to have walked this path, I couldn't go back. I'd had a taste of defiance and it had gone down like nectar. Sweet and alluring, with none of the bitterness I'd expected. And although I had a moment of doubt, the moment Jake held me it dissipated into nothing.

"Not yet, I don't." I sighed, letting the damp spot I'd made on his shirt seep onto his skin.

"Yes you do." He replied, noticing what I'd done and pulling the shirt completely off. "You being here means that you do."

The wall clock was ticking. The gentle buzz of the refrigerator sounded out over the silent house. It was strange to hear these familiar sounds in a place that was completely new to me. It didn't feel like home, but I didn't feel homesick for anywhere else either.

"It's been a long night. We can sleep on the pull out in the garage, I don't want you to have to deal with Josh's sleep talking in my room." He said, lining up my expectations like he always did.

"I don't care where we sleep." I shrugged, taking the shirt he'd dumped on the back of a chair and straightening it out absently as if my hands needed something to do.

He noticed.

"You're restless." He surmised, taking my hands into his and wrapping them around his waist. "Maybe we won't sleep, then."

"I couldn't." I confessed. "I keep replaying the sight of her laying in that hospital bed, helpless. And all my Dad cared about was making sure I knew he thought me a whore."

A smug little grin began to dance across Jakes lips.

"A whore?" He chuckled. "I have never given you a dime, how much do I owe you?"

His softness had me melting into it. In the face of my misery, he smiled and brought me into a light no God could ever provide. The sweetness of his love all the payment I'd ever need for the things he took such delight in from me.

"Forever." I replied, "You owe me forever."

The gentle nudge of the tip of his nose turned my cheek.

"Forever it is, then." He replied, nuzzling into a kiss that was slow and delicate.

I liked his house. The way it felt lived in. I could feel the love in the walls, the intimation of welcome and the chaos. I wondered how it could be that such love manifested under a roof so close to one that could scarcely keep the warmth in.

"I think this is what God meant when he talked about love." I whispered, letting him guide me through the house towards the door that opened up into the garage.

Jake was unapologetically shirtless. The base of his spine sitting above his belt, two little dimples that seemed to wink as he walked. Every fibre of him appealed to me, as if he'd been placed at my doorstep to adore.

"Don't worry about God." He mused, pushing open the door to reveal a cool breeze coming in from the drafty expanse ahead. "We make our own luck, our own destiny. We make our own love."

I felt as if I should have been exhausted. But being in this cavern of wonders always took me back to the night he took my virginity. I couldn't step into it without being reminded of the beauty of it, the way he'd been so gentle and calm.

I wasn't a virgin anymore. Any semblance of innocence I had given to him, willingly. I knew the softness of a man's touch and the aggressive streak that could come with heightened arousal. I knew that look in his eye when he wanted my body more than my soul. Things a girl could never understand.

"Fuck me, Jake."

I wanted it. Not to take the pain away, or numb the doubts racing through my mind. But simply because I wanted it. I wanted the rough and the smooth of his body against mine. The rush of blood to his penis, to feel the veins pulse at my touch.

I wanted the power. The femininity of it, to know he ordained himself to me. For the longest time I'd lived under a rule that was not my own. I governed myself now, my mind and my body.

"How would you like to be fucked?" He asked, pulling out the bed whilst keeping his eyes on me.

I could have been shy about it. I could have said it didn't matter, that he could fuck me however he pleased. But it wouldn't have satisfied me.

"Like the whore my Father thinks I am." I replied, without shame.

His hands were already at his belt. Loosening the buckle. Pulling it out of the loops swiftly.

"You'd better take off that dress and get on all fours, then." He instructed, matter-of-factly, as if I hadn't just said the most debauched thing to ever escape my lips.

The immediate flood was inspiring. He was so sure of himself, so certain of his ability to arouse me. Sometimes I forgot that I instilled that same heat within him. And so I did as I was told, letting my clothes fall to the ground as I crawled onto the bed.

I heard the unmistakable thud of his jeans as he kicked them off. The waistband of his boxer shorts as he slid them down high thighs. Soon his hands were at my hips, positioning me at the very edge of the bed with my toes almost peering over the precipice.

"Like a whore." He repeated, sinking to his knees. "I wouldn't fuck a whore like I loved her."

I had known his love and it was powerful. But so too was his propensity to make me feel like the most desired creature on earth. It carved out an obsession within me that had caused a ripple throughout my whole life. I simply wasn't the same girl I'd been at the start of summer.

"Then don't." I said flatly, "Just for once, don't love me..."

The way he didn't hesitate, the way he didn't even verbalise it. He understood what I needed without fixating on the how or the why. I closed my eyes as he spat on my cunt, rubbing his saliva into my submissive clit as he positioned himself.

He loved me so much he would do this for me. The sacrifice was not lost upon me. Part of me wondered if he had been waiting for me to submerge myself beneath the dark waters trying to drown me. If all along he'd wondered if the virgin would go rogue.

"The pastor's daughter has finally listened to the devil." He uttered, through gritted teeth, leaning in to my pussy like it was a water fountain, curving his mouth into the slit like it was about to satiate his thirst.

"He speaks to me every day." I reiterated, my voice trembling on the tongue that sliced into my entrance.

He trailed it upwards, licking a clean stripe from my pussy into the valley of my ass. And there he set to work, chasing all the choirs of angels that had ever sung to me. They flew skyward out of my mouth as I let out an agonized cry of pleasure.

He ate like a man starved. Like a man who had never set his tongue to speak, let alone venture into the parts of my body that never knew it could feel so good to be lashed.

"You know I love you." He breathed, his words strained on the way he swallowed.

"I know." I replied, almost in whisper.

"Good." He murmured, railing his tongue against my swollen lips. "Because for the next five minutes it's going to feel like I don't."

I was immediately drawn to the paint peeling on the brick wall. I was never really sure why my eyes zeroed in on it. Perhaps because my other senses were overwhelmed. I just needed something to tether me to this plane of existence. To feel as if any of it was real.

I stared at that white speck of flayed paint as my body convulsed. Jake, like he had lost his damned mind, sucked my pussy lips into his mouth and the devilish sound that it made turned my cheeks crimson.

And then, without any warning, I felt it. The curious finger that opened me up, a delicious new venture to take my mind away from itself. And I closed my eyes against it, not even able to tether myself to the wall.

My pussy, feeling the void of his touch, pined as he gently probed inside that other begging place. Filling it, exploring it. And I didn't have any way to fight it, least of all when he slammed his cock into that neglected hole. Fingers edging further into my ass, his hard beast giving me exactly what I had asked for in my pussy and my mind on the verge of euphoria as I forgot even the first syllable of my own name.

He was wrong. He'd never been more wrong. As he heaved and pounded, delicious strokes that hit me deep and hard I'd never felt more loved. My entire body pulsed with the magnitude of each thrust. My vulnerability laid bare, like he'd seen the heart of me since the very first time we'd caught each other's eye.

I wanted to touch him so badly, so maddeningly. But it drove me wild how easily he could take control and I would submit. Despite my shallow breaths, a gasp still managed to find it's way to my lips as he pulled out of my ass, swirling that same finger around the hole before stroking it with the pad of his thumb.

Everything I had come to know about sex was at Jake's teaching. Even this. This moment of sheer abandon, forceful indulgence in something I had clearly needed for so long but hadn't known what it was that would cure me of this melancholy.

I was nearing the point of thoughtlessness when I heard his whisper. His body leaned into the curve of my spine, his stomach nestled against me as his hand pulled back my sweat drenched hair. Cock held deep inside, his lips at the shell of my ear.

"Whore..."

There it was. Every single facet of my soul lingering in the ether between us. Getting fucked, getting my pussy so unashamedly pounded I felt nothing but pride. In Jake, in myself. There was nothing outside of it, nothing outside that one word that I had now reclaimed.

"Hail Mary, full of grace..." I recited, my voice barely audible over the stream of moans. "The Lord is with thee..."

"That's it little whore, pray..." Jake encouraged, wrapping my hair around his fist.

"Blessed art thou among....uhh...women..." I choked, feeling my head reel back as he pulled. "And blessed is the...oh, fuck...fruit of thy womb..."

He fucked harder, faster. Keeping my body aligned with him by pulling my hair.

"Tell him." He urged, "Tell your God who you belong to now."

My brain completely shut off from the inhibited parts that would scream at me to be decent, to have the kind of sex that God would approve of. There was nothing but the throbbing girth and savage onslaught of Jake fucking me left to commit myself to.

"Holy Mary, Mother of God..." I breathed, my mouth unforgivingly dry. "Pray for us sinners...now...and in the hour...fuck...in the hour of...fuck......"

"Our Death..." Jake completed for me, sending me into an orbit that was higher than any heaven could hope to be.

Had it only been five minutes? Every muscle and sinew ached, every nerve ending a blaze. My cunt was soft and wet, filled with his cum and the moisture of mine. My hair follicles stung, raw from the pull. I felt Jakes body slide against mine, sweaty and spent. The violence of his furious assault in the flush of our flesh.

I'd never felt more at peace.

"You want me to fuck you like that again, my death might be a real concern." He sighed, falling onto his back as I tried to regain my composure.

I'd never seen him look so absolutely ruined. The sweat and the rose in his cheeks making him look decidedly demonic. The dilation of his pupils made his eyes look pitch black in the almost darkness. He was my satan, my sinful reason to renounce all that I had ever known.

"But what a death." I replied, trailing a palm down my wet breasts, feeling my skin pricked with sweat. "And when you're entering the gates of hell you'll have sweet memories to keep you company."

"Hell can only exist if you believe in it." He said morosely, pulling me down into the clammy circle of his arms. "And after tonight, I've got a feeling you'll be less inclined to worry about ending up in eternal hell fire."

My cheek was sticking to his chest. But I didn't care. I let my skin absorb into his. Running my finger up his stomach, catching the little drenched hairs below his belly button.

"I don't care." I didn't know it until I said the words out loud. "All I want to do is make sure Jolene gets better, and make sure she never goes back to that life."

I had no concept of the time as I opened my eyes. I could feel the heat of the afternoon burning behind the garage door, though. A beam of yellow light framing the steel door. I sat up on the pull out bed, wrapped in blankets as if I'd been tucked in as I slept.

My dress was still draped on the arm of the chair opposite, everything left as it had been the night before. The only thing missing was Jake, his muffled voice carrying down from the house above.

I dressed in haste and found myself feeling a little nervous as I climbed the stairs towards the kitchen. Voices falling to silence as I turned the door handle.

I could feel the atmosphere thicken as I walked in. Jake was standing by the island, his palms flat on the counter and his head bowed. As if he'd been engaged in a conversation that brought him no joy. His Mother was standing at the hob, stirring a pot of something that smelled delicious. Her faded smile awkwardly returning as she caught sight of me.

Josh and Sam were sitting at the table devouring a plate of pancakes, their sister idly reading a book with her feet up on the chair next to her, barely noticing my entrance.

"Sit down, dear." Karen offered, "There's pancakes on the table and I'm making some porridge if you prefer."

The kitchen was still littered with the night before, empty beer cans and chip bags. But nobody seemed to care, and it made me feel more at home. Despite the lull in conversation as I took a seat around the table, I had hope that it was because nobody had expected me to be there.

Sam, still chewing his food, smiled.

"Do you think it'd be ok if I went to see Jolene in the hospital?" He asked, shoving an empty plate towards me.

"Sweetie, we talked about this." Karen said, pointing her wooden spoon at him. "I don't think Mr. Jones would appreciate that."

Perhaps I should have interjected. I could feel Jakes eyes on me, waiting for me to agree or disagree. Ronnie looked up over the lip of her book, and Josh offered me the syrup.

"You don't have to walk on eggshells." I ventured, "I don't have anything to say about my Father that will be positive."

"I already told you." Jake sniffed, "She doesn't want to go back there."

Karen shot her son a knowing look, one that I couldn't be a part of. But I understood the meaning of it. She would protect her flock from the bullshit my family posed, but she would welcome me regardless of it. Whatever it meant, she had to trust that her son had everything under control.

A part of me doubted that she held that much trust in her youngest son. I didn't know why, but I'd seen the careless nature in Sam. His propensity for letting himself run away with frivilous ideas. This and Jolene's chaos was a deadly combination.

"You're welcome to stay here as long as you need." Karen offered, putting a bowl of thick and gloopy porridge in front of me.

She sprinkled it with some fruit and looked pleased with herself. The sort of Mother I'd never known. Suddenly I was ravenous and began spooning the mixture into my mouth like I hadn't eaten in days. Maybe I hadn't?

"Don't they feed you over there?" Josh asked, amused by me.

Jake railed his palm against the back of Josh's head, ruffling his curls.

"I know you're joking, but be fucking nice!" He warned, pushing Ronnie's feet off the only empty chair before taking it.

"I am being nice!" Josh replied, shrugging in surprise. "Sorry, Bonnie."

I shook my head. It didn't matter. Sam was still waiting for me to say something to his request. As if what Karen had said didn't answer the question for him.

"So, what do you think?" He continued, "About me being able to go up to the hospital?"

I was still chewing on the blueberries popping against my tongue as I sluiced the porridge around my mouth. Savouring the taste. Wondering if breakfast was always this delicious, or did everything just taste better now that I was free?

I was still formulating an answer when the doorbell went. The ring of it making everyone exchange this strange look of wonder. Perhaps their doorbell was so seldomly pressed it came as a surprise that someone was at the door. It struck me that the Kiszka house was an open door policy. Anyone that knew them well enough to have occasion to visit simply stepped inside.

"I'll get it." Jake said, after realising nobody else would.

It didn't take long for me to hear the voice my brother used when he was trying to be polite, but it was nothing more than a facade to the way he really felt. I could hear the clipped tone, the words appropriate enough but I could imagine his smug little face.

I shot up from the table. Determined to make this problem go away. Feeling as if I owed no more bullshit on their doorstep.

"What do you want, Ben?" I asked, letting Jake step aside as I approached the door.

He didn't look smug at all. There was this pained look in this eyes that I'd never seen before. Like he hadn't slept. His shirt wasn't tucked in and his hair wasn't neatly combed as usual. His chin was trembling, as if he was on the verge of tears he would never allow himself to shed.

He was forlorn. "Can't a brother check up on his sister?"

I almost laughed. "I really don't think you care."

"I do..." He replied, without hesitation, his eyes widening to prove his point. "Of course I care. I've got one sister in the hospital and the other one hiding out in the house across the street. We need you to come home, both of you."

The use of the word 'we' incited an anger in the pit of my stomach I hadn't known burned quite so brightly. It flared in the whites of my eyes and made my palms grow clammy. I looked to Jake, but he simply held the door open and waited to move on my cue.

"Close the door Jake, we're done talking."

He didn't ask questions, he just let the door swing free. When Ben stepped inside and jammed his foot against it closing, only then did he gently move me back. Standing in front. Meeting my brother at eye level.

"Take your foot out of my door, dude." He softly warned, "That's not cool."

He didn't even look at Jake, it was as if he wasn't even there. Like this wasn't his house and he was nothing more than a minor inconvenience.

"You disobey your Father, you disobey God." He said ominously, "Is that what you want, Bonnie?"

I couldn't entertain him. Every word that spilled out of his mouth now sounded like the most ridiculous thing I'd ever heard. Nonsense. The word of God? A tool used to keep me compliant. In fear. I could see his concern laced in his furrowed brow, but it was misplaced.

He wasn't concerned for me. He was concerned with the reaction he would get if he went home empty handed.

"Yes, Ben." I replied, "That is what I want. Ok???"

He'd forged his way into every traumatic moment of my life. Standing on the periphery of every abusive little thing Dad had ever said or done to me. Like a strange little voyeur, living under the same roof but having an entirely different experience.

"You heard her." Jake echoed, kicking my brothers foot aside before slamming the door in his face.

The eggshells were still being walked on as I hurried back to my breakfast. It broke my heart. And I couldn't eat another bite, everything going down in lumps as I sat there fighting back tears. Everyone was silent. I couldn't take it.

"Yes, Sam." I mumbled, trying to find my voice without it breaking on tears. "Get your jacket, we'll go up to the hospital."

His eyes lit up. His smile beamed. Like I'd handed him the holy grail and told him it would grant him unending powers. The sort of joy that was only reserved for the first flushes of love.

I looked at Jake, knowing it wasn't like that for me and him. He wouldn't find joy at being granted access to my hospital bedside. He would be injured at my side, or cutting down the last tongue that ever tried to tell him he could not see me.

I could still feel the ache between my legs that he had left as a reminder of his unwavering devotion. And I knew that whatever was to come would be a testament to that. To the coil wrapped around us both.

I couldn't fathom what was about to happen.

To be continued...

@caprisunsister @thewritingbeforesunrise @takenbythemadness @katuschka @its-interesting-van-kleep @lvnterninthenight @writingcold @jakekiszkasbuttsweat @edgingthedarkness @velveteencatch @lyndz2names @nina-23-45 @itsafullmoon y @char289 @dancingcarbon @gvfpal @violetstarcatcher @wetkleenex-gvf @jazzyfigz @gvfmarge @ignite-my-fire

[myownparadise96]

I have made this terrible discovery....

His arms, his chest

[myownparadise96]

🫠

[myownparadise96]

I just want y’all to know that every time i see the gif of Jake munching on a Tim Tam I can just imagine/hear how he eats a bowl of cereal and that makes my skin crawl.

And that’s partial trauma I have growing up with two gross older brothers.

[myownparadise96]

he looks so cunty here. and i just need him. i need him bad.

[myownparadise96]

This bitch can TIGHTLINE

[myownparadise96]

Film Jake 📸

[myownparadise96]

[myownparadise96]

Good morning ☀️

[myownparadise96]

I Was Born to Love You - Jake's Version Pt. 2

A gracev0609 / @losfacedevil collaboration

The long awaited second chapter of Jake and Sevda's story.

Warnings: 18+ Only, Minors DNI, Adult Themes, Explicit Sex, Childbirth

The second her eyes opened Sevda felt her stomach flip, nausea quickly setting in. Ripping herself away from Jake's sleepy grasp she rushes to the bathroom, making it to the toilet before the contents of her stomach can make an appearance. Too preoccupied to hear him come in, she jumps when his warm hand makes contact with her cool clammy skin.

“You're okay, my love,” he rubs soothing circles on her back as she takes deep breaths, willing her stomach to settle. Even though he knows this is all a part of pregnancy he can't help but feel a little guilty.

She lifts her head to look at his face, her eyes a little watery from the ordeal,” This is the part I wish I didn't have to do again. My morning sickness is so much worse this time around.”

She watches his shoulders slump slightly,” I'm sorry Sevvie…”

She swipes the wetness from her eyes before standing up and flushing,”You don't have to be sorry Jacob. I knew what I was signing up for.”

Jake pushes the big t-shirt of his she was wearing up over her little bump and places a kiss to her skin,” You've gotta stop making mommy feel so sick, okay? Otherwise we might have some beef.”

Sevda laughs loudly, the shrill sound echoing off the tiles,” Jake you're not having beef with our unborn child, oh my god!”

She looks down at him still on his knees, with a wide goofy smile on his face, she runs her hand through his hair,” You're ridiculous, I swear.”

He stands and wraps her in an embrace,” I love you… I can't wait until we find out what we're having. Ah, I was thinking, if we have a boy, we could name him Les Paul. Like first name Les, middle name Paul.”

Sev blinks a few times fully processing what just came out of his mouth. “Jake…. I'm not… I'm not naming our son after a guitar.”

Jake places his lips to her forehead,” Babe I'm totally fucking with you!”

She blows out a breath, shaking her head.

He giggles, breaking their embrace, “I'm gonna go get some coffee started and get Jade ready.”

She watches as he turns walking away, shirtless with his sweats hung low on his hips. Swallowing hard she wills those thoughts out of her head.

🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷

Jades excitement outweighed her little body’s demand for sleep as she pushed herself out of her twin sized bed and slowly toddled down the hall towards her parents room. Pushing their bedroom door open slowly she found them both still sound asleep in their bed. A soft huff escaped Jade as she crawled into bed between them and snuggled up, pressing her cheek against Jakes back as Sevda stirred and wrapped her little girl in her arm.

“Mama, we meet Halina today, right?” Jade cooed, her little voice giving away just how tired she still was. Sevda nodded gently and pressed a soft kiss against the back of Jades head.

“Yes, we meet the baby today. But we need to get our sleep right now. Daddy won’t be happy if we wake him.” She giggled, reaching up to run her fingers gently through Jades hair.

“Sleep now, Halina later?” Jade mumbled, slowly succumbing to sleep once more.

“Yes, baby.” Sev cooed, pressing a soft kiss to the back of Jades head.

🩷🩷

Jake was in the limbo between sleep and the realm of consciousness as he reached up and stretched his arms above his head. It was then that he felt the warm, small hand resting against his bare chest and the cool spot underneath her smushed cheek; a little puddle of her spit quickly drying in the warm air of the room. Jake brought his arm down and wrapped it around Jade’s little body, pressing her closer to his side and reveling in the sleepy cuddles.

“It’s time to get up, baby girl.” Jake mumbled, gently dancing his fingers along her side, trying to tickle her awake. Jade stirred slightly and nuzzled her face deeper into the dip where his arm meets his shoulder. A tired chuckle slipped past Jakes lips as Jade flexed and curled her fingers, searching for the fabric of the shirt he wasn’t wearing to cling onto. Reaching up she tangled her little fingers in his hair that fell across her forehead.

“Shhh.” She mumbled, twirling and rubbing his hair between her fingers to self soothe back to sleep. A soft sigh slipped past Jakes lips as he shifted and wrapped her little body up in both of his arms, snuggling her.

“We gotta get ready. We’re meeting Halina today, remember?” Jake cooed, pulling his head back to see her sleepy face which was half shielded by his hair. A smile spread across her face and her eyes sprung open at the mention of meeting the baby.

“Can I wear my pretty dress to meet her?” Jade asked, excitement slowly lacing her voice as she wiggled out of his arms and pushed herself into a seated position.

“I don’t know, babe. Why don’t you go ask Mama while I get dressed and then I’ll do your hair, sound like a deal?” Jake asked, reaching up to rub the sleep out of his eyes. Jade's eyes lit up and she nodded enthusiastically.

“Piggy braids?!” She asked, quickly scrambling off the bed and took off in the direction of her room.

Jake couldn’t help but chuckle at her excitement and reached up, stretching out his stiff back and used the momentum from his arms to pull him to into a seated position. He wasted no time in getting up and made his way to the bathroom, quickly running through his morning routine and threw on a pair of comfy sweat pants and a threadbare T-shirt. The sound of Jades little feet slapping against the hardwood floor alerted Jake to her presence as she popped up in the doorframe of the bathroom.

“Daddy, look!” She squealed, waiting for him to finish drying his face and turn his attention to her before spinning around and watching her skirt twirl. She beamed up at him as she munched on the poptart she held gingerly in her hand.

“Mama caved I see.” He chucked, holding his hands out to her. She nodded eagerly and twirled once more before stepping forward so he could pick her up and place her on the edge of the sink, letting her cross her little legs in the bowl of the sink.

“Now do you want regular piggy braids or Elsa piggy braids?” He asked, holding his hand against her forehead as he sprayed her hair generously with water. Bringing her hand up to her face she tapped the tip of her index finger against her chin as she thought about it.

“Elsa piggy braids!” She declared, tipping her head so Jake could brush all of her hair towards the back of her head. A soft smile spread across Jakes face as he slowly began to pull the brush through her tangled brunette locks. She watched him in the mirror as he placed the handle of the brush between his teeth and used his pinky finger to part her hair as evenly as he could.

“Daddy?” Her little voice chirped, waiting patiently for him to remove the brush and answer her.

“Yes baby?” He looked up and caught her eye in the mirror, watching as a soft smile spread across her face, and she looked down to her princess dress.

“Do you think Halina is gonna like my Else dress?” Jade asked, spreading out the skirt over her little legs. Jake nodded softly and began to braid the right side of her hair.

“I think Halina is going to love your dress. Maybe we can even get her a matching one next time we go over to visit.” Jades eyes grew wide and an excited squeal slipped past her lips. Jake tied off her first braid and quickly braided the other side of her hair, leaning down to press a soft kiss to the crown of her head before lifting her off of the sinks edge and setting her back down on the floor. She took off at a run, going to find Sevda and finish getting ready.

🩷🩷

“Lucy, we’re home!” Sevda called as they pushed their way through the front door of Josh and Y/N’s house. Jake couldn’t help the chuckle that slipped past his lips as his twins head popped around the door jam and he smiled warmly at them.

“Lucy ran to the store for some more wipes, so you’re stuck with Ricardo and thing one and thing two for now.” Josh chuckled, making his way out into the living room. Kneeling down he checked on Halina - who was fast asleep in her swing - making sure she was still in a safe position.

“Uncle Josh, guess what!” Jade giggled, making her way past Sevdas legs. Josh turned his attention to Jade and let his jaw drop slightly, feigning shock as he reached up and placed a hand to his chest.

“You didn’t tell me we were in the presence of royalty! And who have we here?” He asked, holding a hand out for Jades little one. She giggled at his antics and twirled in place, watching as her dress danced on the breeze.

“Nooo, it’s just me, Jade! Do you like my pretty Elsa dress?! Mama brought one for Halina too!” She giggled, turning at the waist and reached up to yank the shopping bag out of her mothers hand. Josh couldn’t help but chuckle as he accepted the bag Jade held out to him and opened it gingerly, taking out the Elsa themed onesie complete with a frilly tutu.

“We can match, Uncle Josh!” She giggled, turning to perch herself on his knee and wrapped her little arms around his neck, nuzzling her face against his cheek. Josh wrapped a sturdy arm around her waist and pushed himself to stand, holding the little girl firmly against his hip.

“And you have the pretty braids to match! You went all out to meet your cousin didn’t you, Gem?” Josh chuckled, leaning forward to press a soft kiss to her cheek.

“Cousin?” Sam’s voice could be heard from down and the hall and Jakes eyes widened. This was not the time or the place for this kind of introduction. Josh turned on his heel and bounced in place, making sure Jade was secure on his hip.

“Yeah, Jake and the family came to meet Halina now that she’s a little bigger and Jade can’t break her.” Josh chuckled, watching as Sam made his way into the living room. A confused expression kissed Sam’s features as he took in the scene in front of him, both of his brothers, Jakes girlfriend and a little girl he didn’t recognize.

“And who’s this little princess?” Sam asked, closing the distance between the four of you. Jade sunk down a little bit, hiding her face in the crook of Josh’s neck.

“Daddy, who is that?” Jade mumbled, clearly unsure of the man that now stood before her. Jake let his head fall, the laces of his shoes now more interesting than anything else in the room. Cleaning his throat he looked up and took in the hurt expression on Sam’s face.

“Well, baby, remember how I told you Uncle Josh wasn’t your only Uncle? That’s Uncle Sammy… he’s daddy’s younger brother.” Pain and anger bloomed across Sam’s face as what Jake had just said sunk in, and he crossed his arms over his chest.

“How about we go get a snack, how’s that sound?” Josh mumbled to the little girl and turned on his heel, hightailing it out of the room with Sevda in tow.

Jake took a deep breath and his gaze found Sam’s as he braced himself for whatever was about to come his way. Sam sucked the sides of his cheeks in between this teeth and nibbled down on them as he waited for Jake to say something - anything.

“I’m sorry, Sam… I really am.” Jake mumbled, reaching up to scrub a hand down his face. Sam scoffed and crossed his arms over his chest, eyeing Jake up and down as he waited for him to continue.

“That’s… that’s all I get? That’s a I’m good enough for? ‘I’m sorry, Sam.’ There’s a whole ass little baby who calls you daddy and I wasn’t good enough to be informed of that bit of your life? She may not be yours but she calls you DAD JAKE! That should have been enough to loop me in with everyone else. Is… is that Gem? IS THAT WHO JOSH SPENDS DAYS WITH?! And I don’t get to know her? To spend time with her? I’m not important enough to meet your… daughter?”

Jake deflated as Sam’s voice pounded against his eardrums, loud enough to get his point across but soft enough that the babies wouldn’t hear. Sam’s face fell as he realized Jake had nothing to add. He straightened out his back and took a step towards Jake.

“So tell me why, then. Huh? Why was I not important enough to know about Jade? How long has she been a part of your life? Calling you dad? How long have you been hiding a daughter from me?” Jake swallowed hard and took a step back, unsure of what his younger brother was capable of.

“Three years… but she’s only recently started calling me dad.” Sam’s eyes grew wide and he stomped his foot like a child that wasn’t getting his way - anything to not put his hands on Jake.

“THREE YEARS?! She’s been with you three fucking years? You let Josh have full reign in her life and I’m not even allowed to know she exists?! I come here to meet who I think is my only baby niece to be met with another little girl I’ve never seen before. I get that she’s Sevda’s and maybe she was standoffish about your family having a relationship with her but the least you could have done was told me! Send a picture! She’s my niece too.” Jake took a deep breath and steeled himself before tipping his head to find Sam’s gaze.

“She never came up, Sam. There was never a good time to be like oh yeah by the way I have an XYZ year old bonus daughter.” Sam couldn’t help the sigh that slipped past his lips, his broken heart outweighing the logical thoughts in his mind.

“Yknow what? I don’t even care. How’s that sound? I don’t give a shit, she’s more than welcome to be part of this family where I’m not involved than so be it. Keep her away from me.” Sam reached up and placed his hands against Jakes shoulders, giving them a gently shove before he pushed past him.

🩷🩷

Jades attention span on her coloring book was dwindling as the whispered voices of the adults began to put her to sleep. Pushing herself to her feet she slowly made her way over to the break in the door and poked her head around the door jam, watching as her uncle sat on the couch scrolling through his phone. She side stepped her way over to where he sat and reached forward, pressing a little finger into the side of his knee to grasp his attention.

“Hi Uncle Sammy… whatcha doin’?” She asked, pushing up onto the balls of her feet and tried to glance at his phone. Sam watched her cautiously before turning his attention to the kitchen door, looking for the adult that sent her into the living room. Using the hands she now had pressed against his knee, she pushed herself up and climbed onto his lap, leaning forwarding to rest her head gently against his chest.

“I’m watching some videos of the instrument I play. It’s almost like… almost like what your.. daddy plays.” Sam kept his voice soft and fought hard to keep the venom he felt from dripping into his tone, he couldn’t take his anger out on Jade.

“Like the guitar?” Jade asked, and reached up, tangling her fingers in the ends of his hair. He nodded slightly and locked his phone, laying it face down on the couch next to him. Jade pushed herself back into a seated position and tipped backwards slightly, causing Sam to wrap and arm gently around her back.

“Elsa! What happened? You almost fell!” He chuckled, pushing her forward slightly on his knee. She couldn’t help the giggles that slipped past her lips as she began to play with the ends of his hair.

“You did it! Your stinky breath almost knocked me over!” She laughed, the sounds almost like that of a belly laugh as Sam’s face fell and he reached up, pressing his free hand against his chest. A soft gasp escaped her as her eyes landed on his hand and she reached out, pressing her own to the back of his.

“Oh my goodness look!!! Look how big your hand is!!” Her eyes grew wide as he held his hand out to her, palm side up and she placed her tiny one against his, taking in the massive size difference.

Sammy lifted the hand that held hers gently and placed his other hand around it, bringing it to his face he drew in a deep breath and blew gently into the space between his palms, making what sounded like a duck call noise.

“Princess Elsa! What was that?! Do you summon ducks along with ice and snow?!” Jade giggled maniacally and pulled her hand from his, reaching forward she started to pluck at the ends of his hair.

“You have Elsa hair like daddy. But daddy doesn’t let me play with his hair.” She mumbled, pulling locks of his hair this way and that, ultimately turning it into a tangled mess.

“That’s cause your dad is a party pooper.” Sam chuckled, flinching slightly as her sticky fingers tugged on a single strand of his hair. Her eyes grew wide and she stilled as she waited to be scolded for hurting him.

“I’m sorry… I’m sorry.” The words rushed out and her and her bottom lip jutted out in a pout as she pulled her hands away from his hair. Sam’s eyes grew wide and he shook his head, not wanting her to have melt down over something so small.

“No it’s okay… look!” He lifted his phone and unlocked the screen, quickly pulling up music video from Frozen. A soft smile spread across Jades face and she leaned forward, pressing the side of her fade against his chest. Reaching up she tangled her fingers in the ends of his hair once more. Sam began to sing along in soft, hushed tones and began to pat her back gently to the beat.

It wasn’t long before she nodded off in his arms, curled up around him with her hand still gently wrapped his in hair. Sam glanced down at her and took in her peaceful little face, mouth hung slightly agape from the way she was resting.

Sevda rounded the corner into the living room, finally realizing that Jade hadn’t come back from the bathroom. Tears sprung to her eyes as she took in the scene in front of her, her little girl wrapped tightly around the uncle she was frightened of just hours before hand and sound asleep.

“So that’s where she’s gotten off to.” Sevda cooed, a soft smile caressing her lips and she made her way slowly into the living room. Sams eyes never left Jades face and he reached up to brush some fly away hairs out of her face, causing her to scrunch her nose in her sleep.

Sevda perched herself on the edge of the couch and reached out, placing a reassuring hand on Sam’s knee. He tore his gaze away from Jades face and an apologetic smile tugged at the corners of his lips.

“I didn’t mean to put her to sleep, I was just trying to combat a meltdown. I’m sorry.” Sevda couldn’t help the giggles that slipped past her lips and gave Sam’s knee a reassuring squeeze.

“You handled it perfectly. It’s past her bedtime anyway, I’m surprised she lasted as long as she did.” A soft chuckle slipped past Sam’s lips as he moved and shifted Jades little body so she lay across his lap, cradling her head in the crook of his elbow.

“She’s so cute. I can’t believe I went from having no nieces to two nieces in one day. No wait, not two nieces… I’m sorry.” Sam’s face dropped as he began to rock her gently in his lap. Sevda pulled a deep breath in through her nose and shook her head lightly.

“She’s your niece too, Sam. No matter how your brother feels about it, she is your niece.” Sevdas eyes welled up with tears watching the way Sam’s face lit up and he lifted Jade up, pressing a soft kiss to her forehead.

“I do have to get going, do you mind taking her? Or… can I lay her on Josh’s bed? Tuck her in for now?” Sam asked, a nervous tone to his voice. A soft smile spread across Sevdas lips and she nodded, pushing herself to stand she tilted her head in the direction of the girls room.

“She has her own bed in Halinas room, Y/N used to watch her when I was working and you boys were on the road so she’s made herself at home here.” Sevda giggled, pushing open the door to the girls bedroom and threw back the covers on Jades twin size bed.

Sevda watched as Sam leaned down and placed the sleeping little girl in her bed and a soft smile tugged on the corners of his lips as he pulled the covers back over her and placed a soft kiss to her forehead. Sam stood to his full height and stretched out his stiff back before turning to Sevda and nodding in the direction of the door.

Exiting the room quietly, she flipped off the light switch and shut the door with a soft click. Sam had already made his way to the front door and was waving in her direction when she looked up from the door. A soft sigh slipped past her lips as she waved Sam off and slowly made her way back into the kitchen.

“I can’t believe you would hurt him like that. What the hell were you thinking, Jake? Huh?!” Joshs voice was a low growl as he jabbed his finger in Jakes direction. He stood with his shoulder pressed up against Y/N’s back as she slowly wedged her way in between the twins. Sevdas eyes found Y/N’s, a questioning look about her face and Y/N shrugged, still unsure what caused the outburst.

“She never came up, I… I didn’t think it was that big of a deal.” Jake was mumbling, all of the emotions of the day crashing down on him as Josh began to lay into him.

“She’s been in your life for THREE YEARS, Jake. The fuck do you mean she’s ‘never came up’? No wonder they look at me funny when I say I’m spending the day with Gem. They didn’t KNOW HER?! Did you even see the look on his fucking face.” Jake pulled a deep breath in through his nose and held it to the doubt of ten before slowly exhaling.

“There was never a good time to be like oh by the way I have a three/four/five year old.” Jake muttered cowering lower into himself as Joshs voice grew a little louder.

“So you just act like she doesn’t exist? You act like that baby in there doesn’t act like you’re the best thing to walk this Earth? You just so conveniently forget to tell us Sam isn’t aware of Jade? You stole a core memory from us. You took the joy right out of Sam when he was told he had another niece. He’ll never EVER meet Halina for the first time again and you RIPPED that memory from him… FROM US! Sunny may not understand but I do.”

Joshs chest was heaving as his anger rose, spitting every thought in his mind out on a single breath. Sevda shook her head gently as she watched Jake shut down, no longer being receptive to the words being thrown in his direction.

“Why don’t you go get Jade and put her in the car? I’ll meet you there.” Sevda sighed and took a step forward, reaching a reassuring hand out to place against Joshs shoulder. Jake nodded quickly and scurried off to collect his precious cargo.

“I’m so sorry.” Sevda whispered, fighting the tears that threatened to well up in her eyes. Josh shook his head and stepped out from behind Y/N. He reached forward and gently enveloped Sevda in a hug, pulling her tightly against his chest.

“It’s not your fault. You didn’t know.” Josh mumbled, letting go of her so she could hug Y/N as well.

“I’m just sorry he ruined your day and stole Halinas thunder. I never would have brought her had I known.” Sevda mumbled.

Her goodbyes were short and to the point, not wanting to make anything any worse. With a wave over her shoulder she slowly made her way out of the house. Jake was just closing up the back door as Sevda slid into the passengers seat.

“You’re an asshole. That’s all I’m saying.”

🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷

In recent weeks Sevda's morning sickness had eased up, making each day more bearable again. As her baby grew and she felt like she gained a little more of her independence back, Jake's overprotective nature increased. He felt the need to take over a lot of her usual responsibilities and let her relax. She was growing his baby after all.

Jake worked his way back into their home, he had just taken Jade to school. A job in which he now found himself doing, making sure Sev got as much rest as she needed. He didn't mind, he actually enjoyed himself driving her there while they had a ‘Frozen’ karaoke session. The smile on his face would grow tenfold when he gazed into the rear view mirror seeing her belting along to the soundtrack. He enjoyed the fuzzy feeling in his chest when he walked her into the daycare and she would give him a tight squeeze and an,’ I love you Daddy.’ and the butterflies that he would get in his stomach when her teacher asked how Sevda was doing and how far along she was.

Once home he found her in the kitchen, her pregnant belly wrapped up in a silky robe, making a hot cup of tea. Jake caged her in his arms, placing soft kisses to her neck. He felt Sev shiver in his arms.

She takes a deep breath to steady herself,” If you're gonna keep touching me like that you're going to have to have enough time to fuck me too.”

He chuckles into her bed head,” One little kiss and you're all hot and bothered?”

She gently pushes her back against his chest getting even closer,” I am so wound up right now. I don't think you know how much restraint it took me to let you leave the house looking like that.”

A shit eating grin adorns Jake's face, as he knows he only threw on sweats and a hoodie to take Jade.

“And your hair is back in a bun. Do you know how feral that makes me babe?”

Knowing he only threw his tangled bed head back in a bun to look somewhat presentable makes him smirk,” Feral? Fuck Sev, getting desperate?”

Sevda grips the kitchen counter and pushes her ass into his hips,” Damnit Jake do you have time to fuck me before you have to leave or not?”

Jake glances over his shoulder at the clock on the wall,” Danny's picking me up in a half hour, we can make that work.”

Releasing her from his arms she grabs his hand leading him to the couch. She places her hands on his shoulders and pushes him down into the plush cushions. He grasps at her hips pulling her into his lap,” Gonna have to ride me love, don't want to be too rough with you.”

Sevda unties her robe revealing that she had nothing on underneath. Jake groans, his eyes raking over her body,” God you look so beautiful like this Sevvie.” She pulls him in for a kiss and he lets his hands wander, cupping her plump breasts gently thumbing her nipples.

In between kisses he whispers,” Gonna let me take pictures of you baby? I want to capture just how gorgeous you are carrying my baby. You're absolutely stunning.”

He looked into her eyes, heavy with arousal and she nods her head,” Sure Jakey, you can take pictures.”

Jake leans his head in, placing hot open mouthed kisses on the skin of her chest, his voice deep and gravelly,” I'll grab new film while I'm out.”

She grabs the waistband of his sweatpants and pulls them down to his knees, letting his cock spring free. In her haste she grabs him, running his pillowy head through her slick before sinking down on him.

Jake grunts,” Jesus Sev. Fuck.”

She swivels her hips grinding her clit against the tuft of hair at his base,” I'm so fuckin needy Jake. You look so hot today,” clenching around him,” Did you even realize that you can see a clear outline of your cock in those sweats? Fuck you're such a tease Jakey.”

Jake's eyes clamp closed as he starts to bounce her in his lap. Her hand snakes it's way to rub her clit as she throws her head back. Jake leans forward licking and sucking on her breasts bouncing in his face.

“Yes! Fuck Jake that's it!”

As she comes undone on top of him he hears his phone start to ring in his hoodie pocket, signaling that Danny is outside ready to pick him up. He internally curses Daniel's punctuality.

Suddenly Sev rises off of him, and he whines before realizing what she's doing as she gets down on her knees. She takes him in her mouth, bobbing her head down his length, her hand jerking off what she can't fit. She brings her other hand up, squeezing his balls, and he groans throwing his head back against the couch cushions. It takes everything in him to keep his hips still as she drives him over the edge, exploding into her mouth. Once she milks him for all that he has to offer her she rests back on her heels, opening her mouth and showing him his load. Maintaining eye contact she swallows him, smiling sweetly,” You didn't have time to clean up a mess babe.”

He tucks himself back into his sweats,” I fuckin love you.”

Jake rises to his feet, holding his hands out for her to help her up.

“I love you too Jakey, now you should run along before Danny calls you again.”

He quickly embraces her, giving her a gentle kiss on the lips, before grabbing his wallet and house keys off of the counter. He makes his way out the front door, over to Danny waiting in the car.

Danny furrows his brow as Jake climbs into the passenger seat of his Jeep,” Dude, you're wearing sweats? You never wear sweats.”

Jake smirks, grabbing the seatbelt over his shoulder,” Yeah man, had an action packed morning. Took the munchkin to daycare and all.”

🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷

A soft sigh escapes Jake as he trudged up the front steps of his place and turned to wave at Danny before unlocking the door and stepping inside. It was later than usual and Jade was already in bed, most of the house lights turned off save for the soft glow of the television in the living room. Jake dropped his bag next to the door and kicked off his slip ons, slowly dragging his feet as he made his way into the living room.

Sevda was curled up on the couch, her kindle long since discarded on the coffee table in front of her and she had her head resting against the back of the couch, fighting to keep her eyes open. Jake couldn’t help the smile that spread across his face as he made his way over to her and laid across the couch, pressing his face gently against her stomach.

“Long day, baby?” She mumbled, reaching down to thread her fingers gently into the hair at the crown of his head. Jake nodded against her and reached up, rubbing the side of his hand along his eye.

“So long, have I ever mentioned how much I can’t stand my brothers sometimes?” Jake mumbled, letting his eyes flutter shut as he reveled in the feeling of her fingers against his scalp. Sevda closed her eyes and let her body fully relax, any worries of the day melting away as the feeling of Jake's weight on her. He reached up and began to trace soft designs against the exposed sliver of skin on her side, sending a shiver down her spine.

It was then that he felt the flutter and something pressed softly and quickly against his cheek. Jakes eyes flew open and he pushed himself up, his eyes wide and mouth hanging slightly agape as he stared up at Sevda. She couldn’t help the giggles that were spilling past her lips as her eyes connected with his.

“Was that what I think it was?” Jake asked, a tone of awe laced in his tone. Sevda nodded gently and reached around to place her hand on her stomach, poking gently in hope of getting the baby to kick again.

“I felt them kick for the first time this morning. They've been doing somersaults in there for two weeks. It's about time they start making their presence known! I wanted the first time you felt them kick to be a surprise too but uh… baby has decided your face was the best place to kick.”

Jake couldn’t help the overwhelmed giggles that slipped past his lips as he leaned down and pressed a soft kiss to Sevdas stomach. He kept his eyes trained on her as his mind reeled with so many thoughts. He continued to press soft kisses to her stomach, showering her in love and affection.

“Oh sure, you’re not gonna do it again, huh? Baby, that was daddy’s cheek, you know! We don’t kick people in the cheeks.” Jake giggled, fighting the tears that welled in his eyes as the thought of his baby kicking him settled in to his mind.

🩷🩷

Jades eyes grew wide as she watched Sevda massage her stomach with the special stretch mark lotion Jake had gotten her. She watched as Sevda carefully lifted her stomach, massaging underneath as a sigh left her lips and her hand jumped to her ribcage.

“What’s the matter mama?” Jade asked, pushing herself to stand in the spot she had been sitting on the floor before slowly making her way over to where Sevda stood. Reaching up she pressed her hands against her moms slick skin, pressing softly against her stomach.

“The baby’s kicking me, sweetheart. Sometimes it hurts where her little foot digs in.” Jades mouth dropped open and she pressed a little harder against Sevdas stomach, hoping to prompt a little foot to collide with her hand.

“She can kick you in there?!” Jade asked, her eyes full of wonder as she found Sevdas gaze. With a soft nod of her head, Sev reached down and cupped Jades chin in her hand, squishing her little cheeks together. Jade snaked her tongue out between her pursed lips and scrunched up her nose - something she did when Sevda was getting on her nerves.

“She moves just like you or I do, just in a more enclosed space…ope! Just like that, baby, did you feel that?” Jade pulled her hand back and a soft yelp escaped her chest. Pulling her chin out of her mothers hand she looked down at her hand and back to Sevdas stomach.

“Emma Mae! That was sissy’s hand you know!” She giggled, tapping her hand gently against Sevdas stomach. Sevda couldn’t help but giggle as she bent at the waist as best she could and placed a soft kiss to Jades forehead.

“Who’s Emma Mae, baby?” Sevda asked, fixing the little girls fly aways as she leaned forward and pressed a soft kiss to her moms belly.

“My sister, duh! The baby mama!” Jade giggled, pressing her cheek against Sevdas stomach.

“We don’t even know if the baby is a brother or a sister yet, sweetheart. But if they do end up being a sister we can talk to daddy about naming her Emma Mae, okay? I like that name.” Sevda smiled down at Jade, not wanting to discourage the little girls creativity and thoughtfulness of naming her little sibling.

🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷

Sevdas eyes held a look of wonder as she eyed the cake that sat on the picnic table in their backyard. Y/N had been in charge of all things gender reveal after having attended the scan with Sevda in Jakes place. Jake had been bummed to have missed a scan appointment but knew she had been in good hands.

“So.. are you excited?!” Y/N squealed as she wrapped her arms gently around Sevdas shoulders. Sevda nodded gently and pulled out of Y/N’s embrace, turning to face her.

“I cannot wait to know, I’ve been dying to find a crib set and coming home outfit for this little bean.” She giggled, resting her hands gently against her bump. Y/N reached out and placed her hand in between Sevdas, hoping the baby would make their presence known. A squeal from Jade made them turn their heads watching as Uncle Sammy lifted her high, interrupting her dance.

She smiled at Sevda,” We picked some good ones, huh?”

Sevda returned a smile full of warmth,” The best ones.”

Sev pulls her fingers closer to the sudden jab of movement from the baby inside and Y/N murmurs,” These little babies are going to be so spoiled.”

Nodding her head Sevda agrees and she lifts her gaze to the rest of the faces in the backyard, the space littered with friends and family. Her eyes began getting misty at the thought of her and Jake's babies spending precious time with his brothers or his parents. Interrupting her thoughts, Jake and Josh come over joining you both.

“Are you ready to find out what we're having love?” Jake asks, resting his chin on her shoulder as his hands caress her bump.

Josh interjects,” Can you believe she wouldn't tell me? She thinks I can't keep it a secret! That's ridiculous!”

Sevda chuckles,” Josh, the only thing that's ridiculous is that you think you wouldn't tell Jake!”

Y/N grasps Sevs hand, giving it a light squeeze,” So… Are you ready?”

Sevda looks to Jake, a beaming smile on her face,” Yeah we're ready!”

Sevda watches as her face lights up, before turning on her heel, hurrying inside to gather the supplies for the gender reveal. Meanwhile, she grasps Jake's hand and heads over to the table set up for them to find out the gender of their baby. Y/N makes her way back into the backyard, carrying a cloud shaped balloon and instructs everyone to gather around. She sits the weight down on the center of the table in between them and instructs to pull on the strings when it's time to reveal what color confetti is inside.

Once the chatter and excitement from their loved ones dies down, and a few people have their phones out recording the happy memory Jake and Sevda are finally ready to know, excitement is churning in their stomachs.

The guests chant as Sev and Jake grab on to the pull strings,” Three! Two! One!”

Excitedly they yank on the strings, and their cloud balloon rains down covering the table in hot pink confetti. Gasps and cheers erupt from their families. Jake has the biggest smile Sevda has ever seen plastered on his face, but it quickly fades as he takes in her watery eyes and trembling bottom lip.

“Wha- what's wrong Sevvie?”

She turns away from the crowd of guests and she sniffles. Her pregnancy hormones wreaking havoc,” It's stupid.”

Jake cups her flushed red face in his hands,” Baby it's not stupid, what's wrong honey?”

“I… I wanted a boy, so he could look just like you!” She steps forward pressing her face into his chest as a sob wracks her body.

Jake stifles a chuckle, “ Sweetheart. Trust me, our baby is going to look just like me regardless of its gender.”

“But h-he c-could have looked exactly like you!”

He rubs his hands up and down the length of her back,” She will look just like me. I think you're forgetting that Kiszkas are basically copy machines.”

A laugh-sob slips from her lips as she remembers that his siblings look so incredibly alike, and that Halina is Josh's mini-me. “ Fuck… you're right.”

She lifts her head, and he smiles at her as he swipes his thumbs against her under eyes, cleaning up the mascara that ran. Sevda's mom comes up, making sure her daughter was okay. “Yeah mom…. Baby brain and pregnancy hormones are one hell of a combination.”

Jade drags Sam by the hand, eager to see her mom. Sevda smiles, squatting down to be eye level with her little girl,” Guess what baby? Mommy and Daddy are having a girl! You're getting a little sister!”

Jade cheers dancing around in the circle of aunts and uncles that have gathered, her mouth running a mile a minute rattling off all the fun she's going to have with a little sister.

“Are you alright Sev? That was some reaction!” Josh asks gingerly.

“Oh! I'm fine, it was dumb! I am actually really happy to find out that we're having a girl. I was upset because I kept picturing a little boy who looked just like Jake, but he then reminded me that she will still look like him.”

Sam giggled,” Ya know, you evened out the ratio. Boys used to outnumber the girls growing up!” Sam nudges Danny in the side with his elbow,” Looks like Daniel will have to have a boy soon to even out the scale.”

Danny chuffs,” Fuck no! I'm not having a kid for a long time, I'm very happy being Uncle Danny thank you.”

Sam pouts dramatically,” Well someone's gotta do it! It's not going to be me, I'm still not even sure if I'm totally committed to Madeline!”

Danny rolls his eyes walking away from the conversation, but of course Sam follows, continuing to jokingly badger him,” Oh come on Daniel! A little boy with your dark curls? That's cute as fuck!”

Once the group disperses Jake pulls Sevda into his side,” You sure you're alright? I didn't want to see you cry today.”

His thumb gliding across the soft exposed skin on her back sends a shiver down her spine,” Really I'm okay. It was a dumb lapse of judgment, deep down I knew I was going to be thrilled with either. And I am! Jade's going to have the best childhood with Halina and her baby sister to play with, she managed to get some built in best friends. Honestly, I have no idea what I'd do with a boy, all I've ever known is little girl stuff.”

Jake leans down, kissing the top of her head,” I'm glad… I'm so happy it's a girl, Sev. I'm getting pretty good at taking care of Jade, after all she says I do the best Elsa braids,” Jake chuckles into her hair,” What can I say, I was made to be a girl dad.”

“You're the best girl dad babe.”

🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷

Sevda could hear Jake rustling around in the bedroom as she places the final curl in her hair. As her waves cooled and set into place she raised her little handheld mirror to her face inspecting her makeup, she swiped a stray flake of mascara off of her cheek before smiling at herself. Setting the mirror down she took in herself in the larger vanity mirror, placing her hand on her bump over her robe, she smiled contently at what she saw in the mirror. Untying the gown she turned to the side, inspecting the size of her bump, her hands gliding over the soft skin.

“My beautiful girl, Daddy's going to take some pictures of us. I'm sure he's going to make us look amazing. Your Dad has many talents babygirl, photography is one of them.”

Sev smiles to herself as she feels her daughter shifting in her stomach.

Jake stands in the doorway, one of his film cameras looped around his neck,” I'm all ready when you are Sevvie.”

She turns to face him, and she can't help smirking when he visibly swallows as his eyes flick from her exposed chest to her face.

“You look stunning, sweetheart. I can't wait to capture you on film.”

“I'm excited too Jake, you have such an eye for photography I can't wait to see what you do.”

Jake steps out of the doorway, motioning for her to follow him. Her jaw drops when she enters the bedroom, utterly amazed at what he's done to set the vision he has in his head. There's string lights on every dresser top and soft warm lit lamps, creating a delicious golden yellow glow. The bedding has been changed completely from dark blue to white. At the foot of the bed rests fluffy white blankets, and a gauzy sheer material.

“Jake… the room is gorgeous!”

“I wanted to capture you the way I see you, glowing. Ethereal.”

Jake removes the camera from his neck, setting it down on the dresser before grabbing a bottle of her favorite lotion,” Can I put this on you baby? I think it'll really make your skin glow in the light.”

Sev nods her head before shrugging off her robe, letting it slip from her shoulders pooling at her feet. Jake pumps some lotion into the palm of his hand before rubbing them together to warm it. He places a gentle kiss to the back of her neck before placing his palms on her shoulders. His hands glide down her back, rubbing the lotion in. Sevda sighs into his touch, the feeling of his warm palms on her skin making arousal pool between her thighs. She attempts to shake off how turned on his touch makes her, but it's no use.

He grabs another palmful and lathers down her arms, the moisturizer making her skin gleam in the low light.

Working his way around her body, his warm palms rub over the skin of her stomach. He places soft kisses to her floral scented skin. Her daughter decides to stretch her feet, poking out above Sevs belly button.

“Jake!” She whispers out.

He already sees his daughter saying hello, he places his lips to the spot she was nudging,” Hi baby. I love you. Daddy loves you so much.”

Sevda's eyes well with tears when Jake meets her gaze with a large smile on his face.

“Fuck, don't make me cry right now. I'm going to ruin my makeup before you even take a picture.”

Jake stands before getting one final pump of lotion,” Ah, I forgot a spot.”

He grins as he places his warm hands on her breasts, her nipples poking his palms. He's careful with her tender flesh as he rubs the lotion all over her chest.

“Perfect love, you're glowing already. Go lay in the center of the bed, I'm going to wash my hands quick before I touch the equipment.”

Once finished washing the oily lotion off of his hands he dons his camera once again. Jake holds it up, looking through the viewfinder, and his breath catches in his throat. Sevda is sitting crosslegged in the center of the bed, her hands caressing her bump, as she smiles down at her active daughter. Her hair looks soft and tousled, her skin reflecting the light. Jake gulps, trying to keep his composure,“Sev… I'm not sure if you've ever looked more beautiful than you do right now. You're absolutely gorgeous, glowing with my baby in your belly.”

Her eyes flick to the camera and Jake clicks the shutter button again.

“Lean back for me love, rest on your elbows with your back arched. Yes! Okay, now cross one leg over the other. Perfect Sev, fuckin stunning.”

He captures her again, before grabbing the sheer gauzy material, draping it over her body. Jake grabs her palm and places her manicured hand over her bump on top of the fabric. Adjusting his shot so he just gets her stomach in frame. He asks for one more pose with the material covering her body. Instructing her to kneel on the bed with her hands cupping her bump, he takes one more picture.

Jake comes up and removes the fabric from her body, causing goosebumps to form over her skin.

Jake whispers into her ear as he clutches the sheers to his body,”Doing okay baby?”

She leans back against the pillows, her legs falling open on their own accord.

“Mmhmm. I just… I can't help imagining you fucking me in here with all the lights.”

Jake chuckles as he feels his skin get hot,” It wasn't supposed to be that kind of photoshoot baby. Just wanted to make you look extra pretty.”

“Come on Jakey, take some pictures with me. You think I haven't noticed the semi you've been sporting since picking up the camera?”

Jake blushes, he can't help the way his body reacts to her. He sighs,” Okay… it's not like anyone but us is seeing these anyway.”

Sev grins, her legs opening wider and she slips her hand between them,” Exactly, we might as well have some fun.”

Jake undresses, his camera swaying against his chest as he removes his pants and gives himself a few tugs.

Hushed he asks, almost breathless,” Can I take a picture of you doing that. Pleasing yourself?”

She nods and he feels his blood rushing to his groin as he gets her hand in frame.

Her voice is low and full of sex as she swirls her fingers around her clit,” You don't have to ask to take pictures baby. I trust you, take whatever you think looks sexy.”

Jake kneels on the bed, crawling between her thighs. Bending down he kisses her belly, trailing up to her breasts. Softly, careful not to hurt her, he sucks her nipple into his hot mouth.

“Fuck Jake, give me the camera baby.”

He takes it off his neck and gives it to her, quickly giving her a brief rundown on how to work the machine.

She gently pushes on his shoulder,” Lean up again for me baby, hold your cock in your hand. Fuck, you look so pretty.”

He pumps himself a few times, keeping himself on edge and he stares down the lense. She swallows thickly as she brings the camera away from her face, studying him in the soft glow. The yellow light illuminating in his disheveled fly away hair makes him look sinfully delicious, his eyes look shadowy and full of lust. Her gaze glides down his torso, admiring the hair that forms beneath his belly button and trails down to his thick heavy member in his hand.

“Jake, you're gorgeous.”

Wiggling her hips to signal to him what she wants he presses his hips forward slightly, and glides his head through her soaked folds.

“Sev you're so wet, god you're soaked. My pretty messy baby.”

She hands him the camera, wordlessly letting him know she wants him to capture this moment.

He hits the shutter button, capturing his point of view.

“G-get some of you sinking in to me.”

He clenches his jaw as he does what she asks, each time the shutter button clicks she clenches around his length. He can feel the heat radiating off of her skin, she's so wound up.

“I think I should put the camera down for a bit.”

She visibly pouts, jutting out her bottom lip.

“At least until my pretty girl cums.”

🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷

Sevda jolted awake, something in her dreams startling her. She turned over to face Jake's side of the bed, looking to cuddle with him when she found that he was awake. His face illuminated by his screen as he scrolled on his phone. Jake turned his head to look her way,” You okay baby? Really jumped awake there.”

Sevda rubbed her growing bump and sighed,” Yeah, I'm alright. What are you doing awake anyway?”

“Well, first the thunder woke me and I went to go check to see if it woke Jade, but it didn't. Then I couldn't really fall back asleep so I started looking up baby names,” Jake scooted closer to Sev,” Wanna see my list?”

A warm smile appears on her face as she snuggles into his side,” Let's see what you've got.”

She watches Jake switch tabs on his phone from the baby name article to his notes app.

“Okay, first on the list is - and this isn't in order of what I like the most, it's just how I came across them. Okay, first is Nora.”

“That's pretty.”

Jake smiles at his love,”Yeah? I thought so too.”

“Okay, next is Serena.”

“Eh, I'm vetoing that one, a girl from highschool who was mean to me was named Serena.”

She chuckled as Jake backspaced Serena off of his list.

“Okay… what about Lilly?”

“That's pretty too, although I'm not sure about flower names.”

Jake typed in a question mark next to Lilly,” Okay, last name on my list is Maude.”

Sev scrunched her nose and shook her head no.“I have a suggestion. Actually, Jade came up with it. Emma Mae. I think it's really cute.”

Jake furrowed his brow, really mulling it over,” Emma. Emma Kiszka…. Emma Mae Kiszka, you better listen to your mother right now! That's a good one, I like that. It's my favorite actually, you like it?”

Sev reaches her arm across his stomach, snuggling closer,” It's my favorite too…. So. She has a name?”

Jake cranes his neck down kissing the top of her head,”She has a name.”

“Jade's going to be so ecstatic that we picked the name she came up with.”

They were just starting to drift back to sleep when a house shaking crack of thunder boomed. Jake sat up, sliding out from under Sevda,” I know that one woke her up. Fuck that was so loud.”

Jake came back into the bedroom with a shaken little girl tucked into his neck. He placed her in the center of their king sized mattress and laid down opposite of his love.

Sevda pet Jade's bed head, soothing her little girl,” You're safe here honey. I know it was so scary and loud.”

Jake places his palm on her little back,” Hey Jade, you wanna know something cool? Momma and I were talking about the name you picked out for your little sister, and we really like it. Her name's going to be Emma.”

“Emma Mae!”

“Yes sweetheart, Emma Mae.”

🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷

The weather had finally broken and it was finally nice enough to get outside again, which meant it was the perfect day to carry out Jake's plan. Josh had come by to pick Jade up early in the morning, her change of clothes packed away in her little backpack. Josh and Y/N were instrumental in making sure the day goes off without a hitch. Tucked away in her little pack was a shirt Jake had gotten customized, as Jade was a big part of the day as well.

A few weeks earlier, while Sev was out with her mom shopping for the baby, Jake had Josh and Sam come over. As Jade was coloring in an activity book at the kitchen table Jake called for her attention,” Hey sweet pea? Can you help Daddy? When Uncle Josh and Uncle Sam get here, can you ask Uncle Sam something for me? He's still kind of mad at me, but you're his favorite 5 year old niece.”

Jade was scribbling away, concentrating on her picture.

“Honey, did you hear me?”

Jade huffs, clearly annoyed that Jake was taking away from her art. She turns to face Jake,” Yes Daddy, you want me to ask Uncle Sam because he's mad at you.”

Jake smiles,” Can you ask Uncle Sam to help with Mommy's surprise?”

She nods agreeing as the doorbell rings and she hops down from the chair, running towards the door yelling for her uncles.

A few weeks later, Jake helped a very pregnant Sevda into the car and started driving her to her favorite cafe. As they sat on the patio of the restaurant, while she sipped on her strawberry green tea and picked at her croissant she sighed,” I know you wanted to have some time to ourselves but I do miss Jade. I mean this is the last bit of time she has until she has to share my attention as well.”

She dabbed the brown napkin on the corner of her eye, capturing the tears before they fall. He watched with a sympathetic gaze as she rubbed her hand over her stomach, the soft fabric of her wrap dress moving slightly.

“I know my love, but we're meeting back up with them as soon as we're done here. Josh even texted me that she has a surprise for you.”

Jake's phone buzzed in his pocket, he pulled it out silently reading the text from Josh.

Josh: We're at the park! All set up by the creek , just the way you wanted.

Josh picture attachment: ½.

Jake smiles at his phone as the pictures come in, first is a picture of Jade striking a pose in the shirt he had ordered, and the second one is a picture of Josh sitting on the picnic blanket with Halina strapped to his chest in a fabric wrap with Y/N and Jade sitting behind him with Sam smiling and waving in the back taking up the rear.

He puts his phone away and looks up at his soulmate. He admires the way she's glowing with his growing baby in her belly. Everyday it amazes him how incredibly beautiful she looks this way, like she was made for this. He notices that she's finished with her pastry so he stands up, grabbing her hand to help her, once she's steady on her feet his hands find her bump and his lips connect with hers in a searing kiss,” Let's go Momma, meet up with your baby.”

Jake pulls his Jeep into the gravel lot next to Josh's, and he smiles as he sees them off in the distance. All four of them are standing on the creek bed getting their toes wet in the stream.

Sev giggles,” He looks like such a dad, it's cute.”

She points to his twin and Jake can't help but agree. Halina is swaddled to his chest, the wrap fully supporting her weight so he can hold her hands free. But of course Josh doesn't, keeping one of his hands on his baby's back at all times. Jake's mind reeled, in such a short span of time, that'll be him. His daughter resting on his chest.

Jake cleared his throat,” He looks good like that. He was meant to be a dad.”

“So are you Jake.”

Jake grasped her hand in his, bringing it to his face so he could place soft kisses on her knuckles. Suddenly, he feels the small box in his pants burning a hole in his pocket,” Shall we?”

They leave the serenity of the vehicle and make their way across the soft lawn to meet them, Jake trailing just a bit behind Sevda. He briefly takes in her image, her blonde hair blowing in the breeze and the skirt of her dress swaying with every step, utterly beautiful.

He sees Jade's eyes light up as she realizes they're working their way towards her,” Mommy!!”

She sprints to get to Sev, a beaming smile on her face. Jake's eyes widen as it doesn't look like she's slowing down to stop,” Hey, hey hey! Cool your jets! Don't run into Mommy, please!”

Thankfully she stops right in front of Sevs belly before gently but eagerly giving her mom a hug.

Sev hugs her tightly,”Hi my baby! Are you having fun with your uncles and Aunt Y/N? Did they get you a new shirt, what does it say?” She holds her at arm's length reading the text, Will you marry me?

She furrows her brow, confused for a moment.

“Sevda.”

She turns to look at Jake and she finds him down on one knee, presenting a beautiful diamond ring.

“Will you marry me baby?”

Her bottom lip trembles as she shakes her head,” Oh my God, yes! Of course I'll marry you Jake.”

He quickly gets up from the ground, slipping the diamond onto her finger before capturing her lips in another searing kiss.

He keeps his face close to hers, intensifying the moment,” I love you so fuckin much. You deserve nothing but the best and I intend on giving that to you Sevda. Our babies deserve it, I'll do everything in my power to shower my family in love for the rest of my life.”

“I love you Jake. I love you, I love you, I love you.”

Jake breaks their embrace and scoops Jade into his arms,” Your momma said yes baby! We're getting married, how amazing is that? Mom and Dad are getting married.”

They work their way over to Josh,Y/N, and Sam all of them exhilarated to watch this special moment happen.

“Oh my God you're engaged!” Y/N squeals matching Sevs excitement as she grabs her hand inspecting her beautiful ring.

Josh wraps his arms around his slightly younger brother, congratulating him, Jake smiles and thanks him for helping him carry out the plan .

“Of course Jake! You know I'd do anything to help you.”

After Josh's embrace Jake looks at Sam, staring at each other for a moment before Sam engulfs Jake in a warm embrace.

Jake mutters low just for Sam to hear,” I was hoping you'd come, that's why I made sure Jade asked you.”

Sam's big brown eyes look to the sky for a moment, before returning to Jake's,”I was mad. I was so hurt, it still hurts to think about. But, I wanted to be here, I'm your brother and I don't want to miss out on any big moments in your life. This engagement, your first baby, and whatever lies after… I love you Jake, and I love your family. I want to be here.”

Eventually Sam removes his arms from his older brother, his eyes looking at the twins,” I love both of your families, I love being Uncle Sam.”

After a moment he lightens the mood and yells for Sev,” Come over here! Let me see that big ass rock Jakey boy picked out!”

Sevda dangles her fingers in front of his face, wiggling them so the light catches the diamond.

“Damn girlie, he must love you!”

Sevda looks at Jake, her eyes holding so much love for him,”He does…He really does.”

🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷

Sevda tossed and turned, her body feeling so achy and uncomfortable. She grit her teeth as her abdomen cramped and Emma kicked her yet again. Looking at Jake's sleeping form she glares, wishing she could sleep peacefully once again. Stiffly she sits herself up in bed, fluffing the pillows behind her before reaching over to grab her phone. It was now 3:27a.m, officially one day past her due date. Sevda had a good feeling that Emma would be arriving soon, she felt like she was making her way into position and her body was beginning to show the telltale signs. She sighed, opening Instagram and began scrolling through pictures from brands and friends. Her eyes began to get bleary and she was about to put her phone down to try to go to sleep again when she felt the smallest internal 'pop'.

“Shit shit shit..” she muttered, struggling to quickly get out of bed, waddling as fast as she could to the bathroom. Once in the bathroom she swiveled her head between the shower and the toilet, before ultimately deciding to sit on the toilet. She sat, removing her soiled pajama pants, and called her mom. After a few rings she picked up,” Hey mom….”

“Is it baby time?!”

Sev laughs as quietly as she can, her mom has been on standby for days. Whispering,” Soon, my water just broke. Jake is still asleep, I'm not sure if I want to wake him yet.”

“He's going to be a wreck!”

“He is!” Letting out a breath of air, as Emma moved around yet again,” Can you come pick Jade up in an hour or so?”

“Absolutely honey, I'll start getting ready now. I love you, and congratulations Sev.”

“Thanks mom, love you too.”

After hanging up the phone and cleaning herself up Jake appears in the doorway, his hair wild and his eyes dark and puffy.

“Are you okay love? I thought I heard you talking.”

Drying her freshly washed hands Sevda replies,” Yeah Jake, I'm alright. Uh, yeah. I was on the phone with my mom… my water broke.”

His eyes widen,”Are you fucking kidding me?! Are you ready to go? Let me go get the hospital bag- Do you feel okay? Uh- I-”

Sevda steps forward, her belly against his, and she weaves her fingers into his hair scratching his scalp trying to soothe him.

“Everything is fine Jake. She's coming soon, but not right now. We still have plenty of time, I promise you that. Hours. I'm going to take a shower, could you lay out my black sweat set? It's hanging in the closet next to the hospital bag. My mom's going to come by in about an hour to pick up Jade.”

His hands shake as he reaches to tuck her hair behind her ear,” I'm so anxious.”

“I know baby… everything will be okay. This isn't my first rodeo,remember?”

He sighs,” I know, but it's my first time. This is it, we've been waiting for this moment for what feels like forever. Trying for so many months, and we've waited 9 months for her to grow so healthy and strong and now…”

Sevda pulls his face to hers, kissing his lips, placing a few more kisses on his mouth before pulling back,”I'm so excited for her to finally make her arrival.”

His hands caress her bump,”I can't wait to hold her.”

Sevda smiles wide,” You're going to look so hot holding our newborn.”

All Jake can do is laugh.

“You want a hot shower baby?”

Sevda hums and nods, so Jake steps away and turns the water on nice and hot for her shower. He helps rid her of the rest of her clothes, placing soft kisses against her shoulders trailing down the valley between her heavy breasts, to kiss her bump one last time.

Sev shudders a breath, heavy with emotion,” I loved us… like this.”

Jake looks up at her, eyes slightly watery,” I did too, maybe one day… we'll do it again.”

Sev reaches down, cupping his cheek in her hand, her thumb softly brushing his cheekbone. Jake stands and sniffs back his tears,”Let me go get your sweats laid out. I'm gonna get ready as well.”

Sevda stepped into the warm spray, letting it help soothe her aching body. She lathers her hands in body wash, freshening her body. Her hands glide softly over her stomach and she grits her teeth as her abdomen contracts.

She holds her hands still over her bump,” I can't wait to meet you sweet girl. You're going to be so loved, your daddy and I are so excited to meet you. You have a big sister and a cousin, and you have an aunt and so many uncles, and they all love you so much.”

She hears Jake come back into the bathroom,” Still doing okay love? I brought your clothes in.”

Reluctantly Sevda turned off the hot water stepping out of the shower and into Jake's arms as he wrapped the towel around her body. He gently dried her body before grabbing her sweatpants, helping her into them. He put her fuzzy socks on her feet before sliding the oversized sweatshirt over her head.

“You look pretty Sev.”

She shook her head in disbelief,” I look pretty?”

“Mmhmm. You're about to have our baby, you look gorgeous.”

Jake cautiously leads Sevda down the steps and to the couch so he can go back upstairs to get the hospital bag and go wake up Jade.A few minutes later he comes back down the steps with a sleepy little girl in his arms as their doorbell rings letting them know that Sevda's mom has arrived.

Jake deposits the little girl onto the couch next to her mom before going to answer the door. Jake opens the front door to reveal Sevda's mom who immediately steps inside giving him a big hug.

“Congratulations honey! Oh, I'm so excited. Are you ready for a newborn?” Her mom asks swaying him in her grasp.

“I hope so.”

She gently rubs her hands down his back, comforting him,” You'll do great Jake, you're such a good dad to Jade already.”

Their hug is interrupted by the sounds of Jade's sleepy footsteps,”Gramma?”

Sevda's mom leans down greeting Jade,” Hi honey bunny. You're gonna hang out with me at my house for a little bit, and when we come back your baby sister will be here. Sound good?”

Jade nods wiping the sleep from her eyes.

“I wanna go talk to Mommy and then we can go alright?”

Jade asks Jake to hold her while her grandmother talks to Sevda, he picks her up softly rubbing circles on her back as she gets comfortable. Every once in a while he presses a kiss to her head, reveling in the last moments it will just be the three of them.

🩷🩷

Jake wasted no time, quickly helping Sevda into the car and sped off in the direction of the hospital. He insisted she sit in a wheel chair so he could make sure she was rolled into triage safely. Once he knew she was in good hands, the triage nurse having wheeled her back to place her into a bed. Jake sent a text to his group chat with his brothers and a separate one to his mom letting them know that the baby was coming.

Time was ticking away slowly, and Jake wasn’t sure what to do with himself. It didn’t take them long to bring Sevda up to the labor and delivery ward, settling her into a private room and let her know the anesthesiologist would be in soon to place her epidural. Jakes phone rang suddenly, startling them out of the almost peaceful silence that had washed over the room.

“Josh… it’s five am.” Jake chuckled, turning his attention to the television that played softly in the background.

“And my niece is about to be born, you better get your ass down to this lobby and bring me up there with you.” Jakes eyes widened at bit at the tone in Joshs voice and he pulled the phone away from his ear.

“Do you mind if Josh comes up?” Jake whispered, not wanting to startle Sevda. She shook her head sleepily and let her eyes flutter shut as Jake pushed himself to his feet and slowly made his way out of the room.

He rode the elevator down to the lobby and, taking a deep breath, braced himself before he slowly made his way to the lobby. A frazzled looking Josh stood in the lobby with his arms crossed over his chest and his sweatpants sitting crooked on his hips.

“What the hell.” He mumbled, walking over to Jake and he threw his arms tightly around his brother. Jake let out a breath he wasn’t aware he was holding and reciprocated Josh’s hug, melting into the familiar embrace he was wrapped in. Jake’s mind reeled with a multitude of different thoughts, but the main one being why had Josh shown up.

“You didn’t think I’d let you do it alone, did you?” Josh mumbled, running his hand along the expanse of Jakes back before pulling back from him.

The hours melded together and the anticipation was heavy in his stomach. He paced the room and bounced his knee in his seat as Sevda's contractions came closer and closer together. Josh stood at Sevdas bedside, talking to her as she drifted in and out of consciousness. This was so much different than when Halina was born, he was calm and patiently waiting for his niece's arrival. Now he was excited and so, so nervous. The stark contrast between Y/Ns choice of having a home birth and Sevda's choice of having a hospital birth was sharp. The lights felt bright, and there were wires and machines monitoring his soulmate and his baby girl.

Sevda called for his attention, disrupting his pacing.

”Jakey, can you hold my hand.”

Dutifully he grabs her clammy palm into his own, wiping a bead of sweat off of her forehead with his other.

“You're doing amazing baby, I'm so proud of you.”

Sevda groaned as she felt yet another contraction beginning, this one stronger than the last.

“Jake. I- I think it's time to push, this is so uncomfortable, can you call for my nurse.”

Jake swallows thickly before pressing his lips to hers. He goes to press her call button on the remote as her nurse walks in.

Sevda tells her she believes it's time to push, and her nurse confirms her suspicion.

“Before anything happens… you should sit down, Joshua, I heard all about how you couldn’t hang when Sunny was born.” Sevda chuckled, wincing as the pressure in her pelvic area intensified. Josh rolled his eyes and pulled a chair over to where he stood before wrapping his hand around Sevdas as well.

In a whirlwind of doctors, wires and monitors, cries of discomfort and agony, and some sweat and tears, Jake's baby was placed on Sevda's chest. She sniffled lightly and began placing kisses on the baby’s head that's covered in brown hair.

“Oh! Oh my god, hi. Hi my baby, Hi Emma.”

Jake stares at the scene in front of him in disbelief, his daughter is here, she's healthy and beautiful and perfect. This is what they've been waiting for.

Sevda's watery eyes meet Jake's,” Come here baby, come say hi to your daughter.”

Jake leans down, face level with hers as he takes in her pink skin and smushy features,”Hi Emma, I can't believe you're finally here. Daddy loves you so, so much.”

He reaches his hand out and freezes,” Can- Can I touch her?”

“Of course you can Jake, you're her father.”

His hand gently cups her head, his thumb rubbing back and forth feeling her soft warm skin, instantly falling in love with his baby.

Once everything settles back down and they are moved into a recovery room, Jake holds his tiny baby in his arms. Sevda rests and he studies Emma's features trying to decide if she looks more like him or her mom. He hears his phone buzzing on the bedside table where it's plugged in, he gently lays her down in the bassinet before grabbing it. It was a ‘good luck!’ text from his mom, looking at the time he figures his brothers will be awake in the next few hours. Jake snaps a quick photo of his tiny baby before sending it to everyone, Emma Mae Kiszka has arrived!

Fin.

Tag List 🩷 @lipstickitty @joshsindigostreak @myownparadise96 @stayinginthesun @vanfleeter @lyndz2names @takenbythemadness @sinarainbows

[myownparadise96]

@ashlee_vanfleet

[myownparadise96]

I should be allowed into every museum’s archives actually

[myownparadise96]

i do, often, think of that quote from wislawa szymborska talking about love and the inexplicability of some of it. "great love is never justified" etc. and it truly isn't. and thank god for that.