naeemajusthasthoughts - Tumblr blog

[naeemajusthasthoughts]

I want to rest

in the abyss

and forget how to live,

to begin and just forget

the exit to society.

[naeemajusthasthoughts]

within my arms

I'll let you bleed

I'll let you seed

I'll let you heal

within my arms

I'll let you breathe

I'll let you free

I'll let you be

[naeemajusthasthoughts]

[naeemajusthasthoughts]

Echoes

I think about it all the time the unresponsive fights and all the make believes I had to endure, dissociated from the storm I don't know you anymore. Perhaps in another life when life was much more simpler unimaginative, black and blue undercovered from all that was due, strayed from what was knew it became a life that dewed. There was no other time a tomb filled with all those lies and the grace of a grave that hole was made out of pain, truth and lies. They became my rain leaving out all those harsh thorns its pierced my heart, bleeding the lost cause dry. My faith died that day pushed me away, now, I have to do it all again.

[naeemajusthasthoughts]

Poetry is the moment

when I try to hide so much love

deep in my soul

but my heart exposes

that secret.

[naeemajusthasthoughts]

it is funny

how your perfect life

settled in my life,

took your time

to built it up

made sure I could see

so I have to feel

all those unpleasant emotions

at night.

its funny how I never once

searched you out

but there you are

innocently interwined

within mine

and I just hate your smile.

[naeemajusthasthoughts]

#poetry

SILENT IS THE NIGHT.

Silent is the night,

when everyone's asleep,

No one hears my pain,

no one hears me weep.

Everyone's in dreamland,

and no one will ever see,

How lonely is my night,

how I ache to dream with thee.

@Ambrose Harte

@Scattered Thoughts

[naeemajusthasthoughts]

To Coco (my 11 year old cat)

[naeemajusthasthoughts]

One summer's day

If there comes a day

when words aren’t strong

know that my heart still longs on,

your youthful face

still haunts me to this day

a smile, made this world okay

broke through, left things undone.

All I wanted in those moments

was to fall in your arms

seek the comfort my reins denied

let you hold me

till the sun dies,

but soon those dreams fades

the mind wakes up

and I am left in this reality alone

seeking for the day

that you’ll come back to me

on one summer’s day.

[naeemajusthasthoughts]

too much red

fall as though it's rain

bring forth your uncouth love

spill it all over this terrain

leave and see the demons of your spawn

your soul was mine long before

you hated my breath

I'll never let you forget.

[naeemajusthasthoughts]

If I lose one day

know that it's not your fault.

My unhealthy mind

spread lies, suffocating the joy

in the small things

leaving nothing but bare surroundings

and my life was never mine

to begin with, my letter was

never addressed to you.

I miss that girl I use to be,

in your eyes I can see

you don't recognize

the monster that has eaten me.

Let that memory rest in your soul

and hold on it like the last note

For it will be the only one you'll ever have.

If I go, know it was never your fault.

I was just not meant for this world

It was frighten, cold and empty

A brittle smile could never make me whole,

just sustain the image of light.

It's time to let go

Feel what you need

love me like the girl I use to be

for my letter was never addressed to you.

[naeemajusthasthoughts]

I never thought I was brave until she pointed out that I went to my abuser's funeral...

I never told her that I went out of fear to make sure that he is finally dead...

[naeemajusthasthoughts]

I know that there is nobody

at times, I try not to let it get to me

my unspoken truths

lies beside me and

the only silence is the beating

of this torn heart.

It speaks of the misery

lost in the tomes

higher than the mountains of my own creating,

I sometimes found peace

in those many moments and

whisper the wishes

lost to me, as I walk

a path only I could see

imagining a place

that puts flowers to shame.

But those moments are rare and

I have only my heart to bare,

though, I know what's left of it

pieces of the truth

left inside this torturous mind,

that there is nobody and

I cannot bring myself

to make peace with it this time.

[naeemajusthasthoughts]

I'm struggling

I don't know what to do

there are tears

and they are red.

Dripping down to my bone

I can't believe I just did it

a lonesome thought turned,

and I'm finally feeling.

I'm lonely.

The voices seems to

make sense, and giving in

feels like the only way to go

like this path was only meant

for me alone, and

no one can see the hurt

inside, I'm too good at that now

I'm falling into this black hole

my mind finally feels like my own

but there are tears

and they are red.

Dripping down to the bone

I can't believe this feeling

is the only thing that makes

me human.

No lies or truth

Just me and my being,

the unspoken, now the mind or the voices

has finally won.

[naeemajusthasthoughts]

I don't want to talk anymore

The hardships left the door

open, and I cannot seem to leave

just an never ending scene

of broken glass and black souls.

Somewhere mine left to be alone

but... there was no place to be free

only stiff boxes and empty glee

holed up traffic of non stop talking

about lost, or was it just desires

forgetting the wrongful criers.

They cannot see, a life and a hole

a grave with burried gold

It was in there that they

told me, sold the laughter

deep within me... replaced it

or perhaps filled it with lonely

now I am just empty.

I don't want to talk about it anymore

They slit out our tongues, and sold

it to the whole ones.

They deserved it after all

for broken things could never be fixed.

[naeemajusthasthoughts]

One touch

Against my skin

Hopeless yet still longing

Unattached yet so inviting

I lost my mind in this yearning

Forever in this lonely mind

Broken by the very time

Unconsoled without

Meaning.

[naeemajusthasthoughts]

There is a part of me unrecognizable

lays in the bitter parts of my heart

blacken and molten to the touch

healing took too long this time,

as if the summer heat blistering against my skin.

I fell into the ocean of regress

broke it and left it to profess

and a smile bloomed once again.

Now there is no part of me

nothing to recognize again.