obes-kenobes-benos - Tumblr blog

[obes-kenobes-benos]

Obi-Wan: My team is professional and mature. We-

Wooley: Is lunch ready yet? We´re hungry.

Obi-Wan: Yes, it´s in the breakroom. I bought juice boxes for everyone too.

Boil and Waxer in the background: Kriff yeah! Tooka Nuggets!

Obi-Wan: Be careful they´re still hot!

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Fives, standing on a chair: The floor is hating general Kenobi

Ashoka: *leaps into Anakin´s arms*

Anakin: *climbs onto the holo table while carrying Ashoka*

Rex: *lounges in a chair with his legs on the holo table*

Cody: *sits gingerly on the holo table*

Obi-Wan: *lies on the floor*

Everyone: nOo

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Anakin: Thank you so much for letting me help plan your anniversary. It is so wonderful to be part of such a special day.

Obi-Wan: Okay, remember, under no circumstances can Cody know about what's going on. He has to make that face, do you understand?

Aakin: No, I don't fully, but my lips are sealed.

[aside to camera]

Obi-Wan: I asked for Anakin's help because he has the most successful marriage of anyone I know, to a gorgeous woman. Which, honestly, is still a mystery to me. Like, was it a force hypnosis accident or something, where they put Padme under and made her fall in love with Anakin and never said the magic word to snap her out of it? Like, if I say the right words, will she wake up and start screaming?

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Quinlan: *getting arrested by Commander Fox* Handcuffs? A little kinky for a first date Commander.

Fox: This is serious Vos, you´ve been accused of poisoning the chancelor. Now, turn around and on your knees.

Quinlan: You don´t have to tell me twice Commander.

Fox: *sighs*

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Obi-Wan: Why are you burning our marriage certificate!?

Cody: Good luck trying to return me without a receipt.

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Obi-Wan: When I die I want Anakin to lower me into my grave so he can let me down one last time.

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Obi-Wan: Schrödinger's cat is overrated. If you wanna see something that's both dead and alive you can talk to me any time of the day.

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Obi-Wan: What's two plus two? Anakin: Math. Obi-Wan: …I will accept that answer.

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Anakin: Not gonna lie, I'm kind of afraid of Cody... Obi-Wan: As you should be. Anakin: No, for real, he is kind of- Obi-Wan As. You. Should. Be.

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Obi-Wan: Seriously, Cody, how many people would you have killed if I’d asked you to? Cody: That’s not important Obi-Wan: I DISAGREE.

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Obi-Wan: My expectations are low, but they can always go lower.

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Obi-Wan: What are you eating? Cody: You wouldn't like it, it's really salty. Obi-Wan: I like you, don't I?

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Obi-Wan, throwing his head into Cody's lap: Tell me I'm pretty! Cody, lovingly stroking his hair: You're pretty kriffing annoying, that's what you are.

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Cody: HYDRATE OR DIE-DRATE! Cody: *Aggressively throws water bottles* Obi-Wan: Uh... what's up with him? Wooley: He is trying to yell mental health and wellbeing into us. Cody: I APPRECIATE ALL OF YOU! Waxer, getting emotional: It's working.

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Obi-Wan: My knee just cracked so loudly that I half expect it to glow in the dark tonight.

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Obi-Wan: Let’s not Anakin this into a worse situation than it already is.

Anakin: Did you just use my name as a verb?

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Cody: The ‘how the kriffs’ and 'why are you so tireds’ don’t matter. All that matters is that I have a new blaster.