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[orangeocelotmartyn]

Hypno: I’m not sure I can trust you…is this a face that I can trust?

xB: Absolutely! 

Hypno: hmmm.

xB: Look at my beautiful blue eyes. 

Hypno: Okay.

xB: Which. I don’t actually have blue eyes. But. Y’know.

[orangeocelotmartyn]

Treebark Week — Frost

An elemental fae like Martyn shifted with the seasons—he was best suited for the spring and summer (in that he looked the most human, then, provided you ignored the leaves in his hair), his skin shifting to a dull gray in the fall, and a bright, hypothermic blue in the winter. It’s how it always was, until he was dropped into the Life games—something about the code constricted him, keeping him that peachy tone, and with his hair covering his ears, one could assume he was wholly human, which is what the server did. 

He didn’t fault them for it—even Timmy, and Grian, and BigB, who should’ve known better, it’d been a few years since he last saw them, so of course they wouldn’t realize, and Martyn quite liked keeping a few cards close to his chest, so he didn’t correct anyone who claimed he was one of the few—if only—humans on the server. 

The whole “falling forever” if not in one of the games certainly shoved the thought of correcting anyone out of his mind, regardless, because he was so rarely called a human anyways, and he thought Ren got that he wasn’t human, what with the whole “you can’t turn me into a werewolf, it won’t work” thing.

But that didn’t change the surprise on his, or the other Hermits faces when he was invited on to visit and was visibly covered in a layer of frost. 

“Whoops,” Martyn said, having taken a tumble out of the rift he got in through. “Didn’t mean to fall for you lot.”

His words did not make the staring any less intense, and he shifted under their scrutiny. “…do I have something on my face? My shirt?” He glanced down, and then blinked. “Oh. It’s winter, is it?”

He brushed off any of their questions with a well timed joke, trying to make himself look good enough that perhaps they’d let him stay a little longer, integrate himself a bit as he scanned the crowd for his king Ren. He was, just like the last time he saw him, next to False (who was perfectly nice, really, if Martyn ignored the pulsating jealousy in his stomach when he saw them together), but at least he was looking in his direction, brow furrowed as he glanced between them.

The rift was rippling again, though, signaling that someone else was coming through and so Martyn stepped aside, letting the Hermits greet the next guest. He was happy for the new distraction, anyways, letting himself be swallowed by the crowd if only so he could peer at Ren without anyone scrutinizing his behavior. 

He didn’t get that chance, though, as a clawed hand reached forward to grab his wrist and tug him closer, out of the crowd, and he found himself blinking up at a much taller than he remembered Ren. 

“Wow, you’re tall. I hadn’t realized—the Life games really nerf us all, don’t they?”

Ren grinned down at him, still looking a bit awkward, but his comment definitely seemed to put a few pieces into their places. “Oh, er, yes, I’d forgotten that you hadn’t—you’re very blue, is that what you normally look like?” He still hadn’t let go of Martyn’s wrist, fingers pressed against Martyn’s pulse, which he was trying very hard to ignore that it was racing.

“Nah, not all the time. I’m just a very wintery boy right now, is all. Comes with the fae package.” He wriggled his fingers on his free hand, as if to demonstrate. “You lot caught me during the worst months, unfortunately. If I had known it was winter, I might’ve had second thoughts.” 

Of course, that wasn’t strictly accurate—Martyn would’ve shown up regardless, if it meant getting out of the void for a bit—a chance to stretch his legs, and, of course, Ren was here—right in front of him!—to talk to and joke around with.

Ren still hadn’t let go of his wrist. “I suppose,” he said, thoughtfully, “that we should’ve called it Blue Winter, instead, me Hand.” 

His words made Martyn wheeze out a surprised laugh, eyes crinkling at the corners. “Milord,” he mock protested, “was red for your colors, and the blood you spilled to protect us!”

Ren grinned right back down at him, finally letting go. “But you, me Hand, are blue like the frost that protected us! We mustn’t forget your work in the pack. Er. Side note: how long will you be blue, exactly?”

“Whenever winter ends and the grass thaws, I’ll get my more spring-y colors back, maybe grow some flowers, you know how it is.”

Ren’s hand came up, then, to caress his cheek, and his eyes peered down at Martyn through his shades. The look was striking, and Martyn couldn’t help what came out of his mouth next— “‘course, there are faster ways to warm me up.” 

False, who was still stood right nearby, thanks, let out a groan, but Ren’s eyes narrowed, calculating. “Well, if that’s what it takes, I suppose I can prove myself very valuable to your cause.” His words were booming, carried well, and Martyn, although he couldn’t currently blush, definitely felt like he should be. 

“Oh, well, if you’re offering—“

Ren dropped his hand away from Martyn’s face, and nodded, more to himself than anything. “Let’s get you warmed up, shall we, Hand?”

——

“You know, this wasn’t what I expected,” Martyn said, words muffled a bit, thanks to the fur currently trying to make its way into his mouth.

Ren, who couldn’t speak, on account of currently being a giant wolf, just thumped his tail lazily in reply. 

False, who had no idea why she had come along, but was at least not currently being laid on, unlike Martyn, took her hand away from Ren’s head (eliciting a whine) to poke Martyn in the cheek. “Shush. I think I’m already starting to see the pink come back to your cheeks.”

[orangeocelotmartyn]

Impulse: I told myself I was going to…get Gem to teach me about Tumblr! Guess what I didn’t do? I was gonna have a—I was gonna have a sit down, hands on lesson from Gem…about how to use Tumblr. It was gonna be—a fun little—boomer moment. (Snickers) Y’all are saying no Tumblr. Man, according to—according to some of the Hermits, Tumblr has been a much chill—more chill place than uh, than Reddit. Oh no, you guys just don’t want us on Tumblr, because it’s your—it’s your secret place. That’s why. You don’t want us checking out your Tumblrs, that’s—that’s where you—(laughter)—I see. I see. (Quoting chat) “Scatter.”

[orangeocelotmartyn]

Joe's Hot Ones experience

Transcript under the cut:

Joe: um, NopeQueen says, "everyone dying in the Hot Ones and then Joe and Pearl just snacking was amazing." Yeah, I--that's one thing--yeah, Cleo, I was talking to, uh, the late night crew about that last night. They were like, 'Joe, what happened with the chicken?' And I was just like, okay, well here's the thing: Nashville is famous for having really spicy chicken. Like, that's just what we eat here. Everybody else, for some reason, eats chicken from Kentucky. But...we don't. So--I was expecting, though, cause people were really talked up this Hot Ones thing like crazy. Cleo: Yeah. Joe: I was like, I'm gonna-I'm gonna get over--walk over there, and get absolutely like, thrashed by this. Cleo: Gonna get wrecked-- Joe: And it's gonna-- Cleo: --Cause you started at like, level nine, didn't you? Joe: I started at level seven. But yeah, I was like, uh--cause I was gonna get tagged in by somebody else when they tagged out. And they lasted longer than they expected to. So I'm like, okay, I'm coming in at level seven, Impulse says level seven in a lot of ways is the worst one. And so I'm just gonna--gonna walk over there and get wrecked. And it's gonna be hilarious. And--I just started eating it, and I'm like, this is just chicken, like, I mean, it had s--the sauce on it, but like I'm like, this is just how we eat chicken, where I'm from. (Cleo giggles) Well, maybe the next level will be hotter? And I'm like...this is still just hot chicken. Joe: Same thing, like, level ten--and, um, apparently too I've been eating chicken wrong, according to the audience. Cause, um, everybody's just like, y'know, cause I mentioned like, yeah, I could-- Cleo: You just chowed down from that. Joe: Yeah. And I said though, I could tell that it's spicy, that's why I had to drink two cans of Coke, and they're like, Joe, you're not supposed to drink Coke with chicken that's spicy. And I'm like, I know, but it was a kid's charity event so I couldn't have beer. And they're like, no, you're not supposed to have carbonation with spicy chicken. And I'm like, what? I-I didn't know this! I've been eating spicy chicken with carbonation for years! Apparently I'm doing it wrong, I must be bad at chicken. Uh-- Cleo: Joe Hills, bad at chicken. Joe: Yeah, yeah. So, I was-I was actually just kinda, like--I was really expecting to--I was like, this is one of those things where I'm overconfident, and I'm gonna get wrecked. Cleo: Yeah. By rights you should be-- Joe: And it's gonna be hilarious-- Cleo: You should've been. Joe: It's gonna--it's gonna be hilarious, but it's for charity, y'know, let's go. And I was just like-- Cleo: You were just like, nah, I'm hungry. Joe: That was the other thing, I was--I legitimately hadn't eaten, I was starving, uh, and so I was just like, 'oh this is--' Cleo: This is just nice chicken. Joe: It was--yeah, it was great. Uhm--

[orangeocelotmartyn]

Cleo wants to meet Skizz the most

Transcript under the cut

Cleo: I'd just like to hang out with everybody, that'd be cool. Joe: It was cool! Yeah, like, I really enjoyed hanging out with uh, getting to know Skizz better? Um, cause even though I had met him-- Cleo: Oh, Skizz-- Joe: --at Anaheim Minecon, like, we didn't really talk that much back then, you know--I didn't really know him, y'know. So it was great getting to spend more time with him, uhm, yeah. Like-- Cleo: Skizz is-- Joe: Tango is a really--oh, go on Cleo: I was going, like, Skizz is one of the people I want to meet like, most. Because he's just adorable. He's just adorable, and he's just so...uh, he's--he's really not like--like, we hung out in the Life series and he's just so nice to everyone? And like, its just sort of like, he's infectious-- Joe: Yeah. Cleo: That's how I feel about him, and he's the person I want to meet the most, I think. Joe: Yeah. Cleo: So. And that's weird, because I've known a lot of the people like, more time than I've known Skizz.

[orangeocelotmartyn]

Jimmy's Customs ordeal and Iskall's surprise

Transcript under the cut

Cleo: Jimmy got stopped at US Customs, is that what you're saying JT? Joe: Oh--yeah, see, that's the thing, so, stuff like that I don't know how much the public knows, uh-- Cleo: Well this is from-this is from my chat, so, like--and Jimmy's Jimmy, Jimmy'll tell people. (laughs) Joe: Yeah yeah yeah, so, um, yeah, he definitely did. Uh--and he was the one that knew the least about what we were doing? Yknow? (Cleo cackles) At least Martyn had done it before, um. But like, yeah, they were--they were trying to good cop/bad cop him, and, uh, I don't know if you know Stage? She's one of the people who works for Gamer's Outreach who helped organize this-- Cleo: I--interacted with them, but I don't know them. Joe: So, yeah, Stage was saying that like, uh, that Customs calls, and is like, hey, we have somebody in holding, right now, that said that you would vouch for them. And she's like, well, I know a lot of people coming into the country cause I'm organizing a charity event, can you tell me their name? And they're like, no. You have to--you have to vouch for them. Joe: And-and-and Stage is just like, well, okay, I could give you a list of all of the foreigners coming in, or I could just tell you that I vouch for this person hoping that it's one of them and not somebody else lying because they know I have a bunch of people coming in, and uh, the Customs people were like, yeah that's good enough. (Cleo starts giggling) It's like, wait, really? That's good enough?! Okay-- Cleo: Wow, okay--(Cleo and Joe laugh) Joe: Like, like, they never said--I don't know Jimmy's actual name, like, um, oh, I will say-- Cleo: It is Jimmy. Joe: I will say a highlight of the trip--oh, but they didn't say like, 'we had James--' Cleo: --oh yeah-- Joe: 'so-and-so here.' Y'know, blah blah blah. Um. But like, yeah, one of the highlights of the trip was, uh, we were at like, a bar, or a restaurant or something and I was signing the check--y'know, you get a credit card thing, you sign it or whatever--and I was signing the slip, and Iskall just looks at me--looks at me and goes, "your name is really Joe Hills?!" And I'm like, yes-- Cleo: Iskall! Joe, through laughter: It just, it didn't occur to him--it didn't occur to him! Cleo: Iskall man, (wheezes) Is it news to him that you live in Nashville, Tennessee, is the question. Joe: I don't know. "Nashville, that's in America!"

[orangeocelotmartyn]

It was Martyn’s birthday over the charity weekend, and they decided to do a lovely surprise for him! Skizz especially was very sweet to check in on him

Martyn: --was, uh, was my actual birthday, um, and after we finished the stream for the day, I was like, really—my voice was blown out, and I was really crashing, and just exhausted from the day, and, uh, I went upstairs, got a drink, and as I came back down the elevator, the doors opened—and I was there on my phone, and I just sort of like, looked up, and all of the sudden everyone was stood there. Everyone. Like, people from the charity, like, all the Hermits, Timmy, everyone like that, and they were stood there with a birthday cake, um, and then they sang “Happy Birthday” to me and stuff, um, which was sweet. Cause I said prior to the trip, like, ‘please don’t make a big deal out of it.’ Um, I said like, y’know, I don’t want the day to be centered around me, I was like I’m just happy that I’m gonna be there with all those people for my birthday, I was like, I don’t want you tryna organize like, a meal around it and—doing anything towards my preference.

Martyn: “I would’ve started crying,” so, I did, but it was after the birthday song. So it was literally—they, they sang happy birthday to me or whatever—I think all of this was filmed, by the way, I think by the charity, I don’t know if we’ll ever get that footage, but, I must’ve looked completely like, just, like, completely caught off guard. Um, but yeah, they sang happy birthday to me, and then I had—(getting progressively more choked up) I’m getting teary now thinking about it—but I got a, um, just a massive wave of, like, homesickness, um, and I was keeping it together, like, I wasn’t breaking the surface, and then Skizz comes over, and in really his sweet, lovely way he just came over and was like, “man, so like, how old are you today?” and I was like, ‘oh, y’know, thirty-four,’ and he was like, “man. That’s such a great age,” he was like, “the kids are a couple years old,” and stuff like that, and he was saying ever—everything he was saying was super lovely, and like, super true, and it was everything that I was thinking in that moment?

Martyn: And it just (sucks in a breath, indistinct) fucking hell, and it just sent me over the edge? It just, it just immediately broke me, and I just sort of had to turn away for a second and wipe my eyes, and when I turned back Skizz had just like, vanished? Um, and I was worried that I upset him, or that I’d offended him, so I literally sent him a Discord DM that evening, um, saying like, ‘hey man, I hope you don’t think I was offended earlier on, like, I was just barely holding it together, and you being so lovely just like, sent me over the edge.’ And he didn’t see that for like, three days, like, cause he just didn’t pull up Discord on his phone or whatever. Um, but then he replied saying like, ‘oh man, don’t worry about it at all,’ um, he was like, ‘I can gauge, y’know, that, that something was about to happen, so I sort of just pulled myself away,’ and I was like, okay, cool, yeah, like, like Skizz is—like people are saying in chat, like, Skizz is got really good empathy, so I think he immediately clocked that I—I think he almost saw it behind my eyes before I went, and I think he then disengaged at that point? But it was really sweet, it was a really lovely moment, but—

[orangeocelotmartyn]

Impulse: --was wondering, no, the hermits were not kissing each other. There was no neck kisses from Jimmy, or Joel-- Pearl: (no neck kisses--) Gem: I don't know, you and Skizz seemed really close-- Impulse: --well, Joel didn't make it-- Pearl: oh. Oh. Gem's seen some things-- Impulse: Uh, there is a really, really cool picture--I said cool, cause I almost said cute--of me and Skizz looking at the eclipse-- Gem: oh, please post that! Impulse: --next to each other--have you seen that one? Do you think that one's okay? Gem: Please post it, yeah yeah yeah-- Pearl: you post it. Impulse: Okay, yeah, that was a good one-- Gem: You should post it. Impulse: It was uh, him and me, side by side, just staring up at the sun, it was--it was actually pretty cool Gem: It looks like an album cover. Impulse: Yeah. It could be, it could be. Ah, such a good time, such a good time.

[orangeocelotmartyn]

Skizz teaching Martyn to throw a football is a new core memory

Martyn: um, the only thing I will say from--from the trip, like, from that moment--one of my favorite moments from the whole thing, whilst we were at this-at this AirBnB, um, which was almost like a bit of a core memory, I guess, it was just really nice--was, um, I think it was me, Timmy, and Gem were out on the lawn, and we were just kicking a ball about, you know, just passing it in a triangle amongst ourselves, and then it was the, uh, it was like Skizz, and Tango came out, and they brought an American football out?

Martyn: so we started throwing that around, and, like, I just couldn't throw it to save my life. Like, I could throw it, I could make it go the distance, but it didn't have that cool, like, corkscrew spin, that it was supposed to have, um, and that's when I had a bit of a, like, y'know, dad teaching you how to play catch in the yard. It was, um, Skizz taught me where to put my hand on the ball, and then to throw it, and it immediately clicked. Um, so, yeah, Skizz taught me how to throw a football. So, there you go. That is, um...that was--that was my little--one of the core memories from that trip, which was pretty cool. So, there you go.

[orangeocelotmartyn]

Martyn: --we've got the--do I seen an "R" at the start of a name there? (gasps, starts laughing) We've got full art, Ren-Diggity-Dog! Oh my god, yes! "Martyn: --we've got the--do I seen an "R" at the start of a name there? (gasps, starts laughing) We've got full art, Ren-Diggity-Dog! Oh my god, yes! "Comin' at ya" for fifty, and "Roleplay" for zero. "Use any of your opponent's attacks, active or AFK, opponents active or AFK Hermit attack does not require necessary item cards attached." Oh bab-ey, we got it, we got it! Sorry Cherri, sorry. Now all I need is a holo. I need a Ren holo, and I'm good to go. I'm pretty sure I didn't get that last time. I'm pretty sure I didn't get a full art. I think I didn't get any of those.

Martyn: --golden armor--"okay, but which of us has a signed card?" Which one of us could go get one any time we want? (smug laughter)

Martyn: --an explorer, and then it's a--nother full art Ren-Diggity-Dog! It's my day, dude, it's my day! They saw my address-they saw my name and address on there and they did that. What's behind it? Ooh, Xisuma! That's cool. I think I might already have that one. I think I already have that one. That's very cool. But two full art Ren's--hell yeah, dude. I can have one signed and one not.

[orangeocelotmartyn]

wow we are all in the parasocial about martyn Inthelittlewood mood today amirite 🥲

Jokes on you that’s always my mood

[orangeocelotmartyn]

It was Martyn’s birthday over the charity weekend, and they decided to do a lovely surprise for him! Skizz especially was very sweet to check in on him

Martyn: --was, uh, was my actual birthday, um, and after we finished the stream for the day, I was like, really—my voice was blown out, and I was really crashing, and just exhausted from the day, and, uh, I went upstairs, got a drink, and as I came back down the elevator, the doors opened—and I was there on my phone, and I just sort of like, looked up, and all of the sudden everyone was stood there. Everyone. Like, people from the charity, like, all the Hermits, Timmy, everyone like that, and they were stood there with a birthday cake, um, and then they sang “Happy Birthday” to me and stuff, um, which was sweet. Cause I said prior to the trip, like, ‘please don’t make a big deal out of it.’ Um, I said like, y’know, I don’t want the day to be centered around me, I was like I’m just happy that I’m gonna be there with all those people for my birthday, I was like, I don’t want you tryna organize like, a meal around it and—doing anything towards my preference.

Martyn: “I would’ve started crying,” so, I did, but it was after the birthday song. So it was literally—they, they sang happy birthday to me or whatever—I think all of this was filmed, by the way, I think by the charity, I don’t know if we’ll ever get that footage, but, I must’ve looked completely like, just, like, completely caught off guard. Um, but yeah, they sang happy birthday to me, and then I had—(getting progressively more choked up) I’m getting teary now thinking about it—but I got a, um, just a massive wave of, like, homesickness, um, and I was keeping it together, like, I wasn’t breaking the surface, and then Skizz comes over, and in really his sweet, lovely way he just came over and was like, “man, so like, how old are you today?” and I was like, ‘oh, y’know, thirty-four,’ and he was like, “man. That’s such a great age,” he was like, “the kids are a couple years old,” and stuff like that, and he was saying ever—everything he was saying was super lovely, and like, super true, and it was everything that I was thinking in that moment?

Martyn: And it just (sucks in a breath, indistinct) fucking hell, and it just sent me over the edge? It just, it just immediately broke me, and I just sort of had to turn away for a second and wipe my eyes, and when I turned back Skizz had just like, vanished? Um, and I was worried that I upset him, or that I’d offended him, so I literally sent him a Discord DM that evening, um, saying like, ‘hey man, I hope you don’t think I was offended earlier on, like, I was just barely holding it together, and you being so lovely just like, sent me over the edge.’ And he didn’t see that for like, three days, like, cause he just didn’t pull up Discord on his phone or whatever. Um, but then he replied saying like, ‘oh man, don’t worry about it at all,’ um, he was like, ‘I can gauge, y’know, that, that something was about to happen, so I sort of just pulled myself away,’ and I was like, okay, cool, yeah, like, like Skizz is—like people are saying in chat, like, Skizz is got really good empathy, so I think he immediately clocked that I—I think he almost saw it behind my eyes before I went, and I think he then disengaged at that point? But it was really sweet, it was a really lovely moment, but—

[orangeocelotmartyn]

Skizz teaching Martyn to throw a football is a new core memory

Martyn: um, the only thing I will say from--from the trip, like, from that moment--one of my favorite moments from the whole thing, whilst we were at this-at this AirBnB, um, which was almost like a bit of a core memory, I guess, it was just really nice--was, um, I think it was me, Timmy, and Gem were out on the lawn, and we were just kicking a ball about, you know, just passing it in a triangle amongst ourselves, and then it was the, uh, it was like Skizz, and Tango came out, and they brought an American football out?

Martyn: so we started throwing that around, and, like, I just couldn't throw it to save my life. Like, I could throw it, I could make it go the distance, but it didn't have that cool, like, corkscrew spin, that it was supposed to have, um, and that's when I had a bit of a, like, y'know, dad teaching you how to play catch in the yard. It was, um, Skizz taught me where to put my hand on the ball, and then to throw it, and it immediately clicked. Um, so, yeah, Skizz taught me how to throw a football. So, there you go. That is, um...that was--that was my little--one of the core memories from that trip, which was pretty cool. So, there you go.

[orangeocelotmartyn]

Fuck I missed Martyn

Him and false playing Mario kart together on the plane is so cute

Plus him saying skizz taught him how to throw a football? Cute as fuck I’m so glad he got to hang out with his friends irl

[orangeocelotmartyn]

Hey do you think the reason scar bought three mugs was so his parents could also have one each

[orangeocelotmartyn]

if Martyn was a drag queen her stage name would be martyny wood

[orangeocelotmartyn]

do you think that the reason ren went off to the other group to “fight” (aka die bc he needed to leave) was so he didn’t have to make His Hand kill him again, because he knew it would be hard on him