pagangoddess - Tumblr blog

[pagangoddess]

happy #ffxivselfie day, darlings! as always i’m so incredibly grateful for the community and friends i have made here. i also want to take the opportunity to post eros again as he might become my main in dawntrail 🤍💫🌙

[pagangoddess]

happy monday, darlings! rael says good morning, now say it back 🤍

[pagangoddess]

Edgy Wonderland Holiday Party

We are going have a wonderful Time at Somer Studios. Come enjoy all the sets, DJ Quade and art by Suzuka. Everyone is welcome. I just ask you leave the Drama at the door and just have fun

[pagangoddess]

Wandering

Wandering the path Alone. Your mind seeks nothing but your heart desires company. You are tour between the two. Which one matters the most?

[pagangoddess]

i don’t know if you’re ready for the true fæ prince 😘🤍💫 happy monday, darlings!

(please excuse the poor quality. still trying to figure out how to get photos from my steam deck to my phone or laptop)

[pagangoddess]

so i did a different edit because it was bothering me 😅 i feel much better about this one. behold the siren prince 🤍🌙

[pagangoddess]

Recently completed commissions!

My commissions are open if you're interested! see tinyurl.com/MizuSuComms for pricing and options!

[pagangoddess]

ᴇxɪᴛ ʟɪɢʜᴛ ᴇɴᴛᴇʀ ɴɪɢʜᴛ ᴛᴀᴋᴇ ᴍʏ ʜᴀɴᴅ ᴡᴇ'ʀᴇ ᴏғғ ᴛᴏ ɴᴇᴠᴇʀ-ɴᴇᴠᴇʀ ʟᴀɴᴅ

[pagangoddess]

The Fox and the Void, Nothing but soul mates.

He holds her heart within his hands...

[pagangoddess]

((Feeling a bit down today, so nothing interesting to say here. I hope you enjoy the picture. Happy Sunday!))

[pagangoddess]

Recently completed Dewey Beans! One of my new, soon to be commission types! Thank you to all my Patreon supporters for allowing me to draw their babies! @the-dark-past @popcornqueenannable @geminiswedeand Aradia (Whom I posted both versions of, pink tipped horns and without)

[pagangoddess]

Finished recent PNGtubers!

And finished recent Dewey Beans! <3

Interested in commissioning me? See my commission sheet here!: LINK

[pagangoddess]

When in your world you see nothing but pain. You seek out the one's you cherish, for those ones will have your back, even when the demon comes out in you

[pagangoddess]

Okay, so I've been having some brain worms/thoughts about Shadowbringers/Endwalker Emet-Selch, Warrior of Light, and lastly, Azem that keep me up at night and I'd like to just theory-craft/spew these thoughts before they take over my brain.

BEAR IN MIND THERE WILL BE SPOILERS PAST THIS POINT!!

Alrighty so, during Endwalker's Elpis questline, the WoL is initially teleported into the hub/entrance to Elpis, and is transparent , unable to be seen by those around them, nor are they able to interact with anything in their environment, and all seems pretty hopeless until a pleasantly familiar voice reaches their auditory sensors and lo and behold, the younger, far less theatrical Emet-Selch and their old-new friend Hythlodaeus have arrived to Elpis to conduct their business, and who is the first one to glance in their direction, obviously noticing the WoL despite how small and transparent they seem to be?

Emet-Selch. The WoL is perceived in these cutscenes, at least from my perspective, as being both shocked and very aware of the presence of this man, who, by all accounts, looks identical face wise to the Emet-Selch they are familiar with. Younger, less jaded and maniacal, sure.

And he notices the WoL almost immediately.

Now where the brain worms begin... Or continue. Emet-Selch and Hythlodaeus can "see" the color of the soul, perceiving it in a way that allows them to uniquely pick out different people based off their soul alone, rather than their physical appearance, something that the people of present day Eitherys are unable to do.

Because of Amaurot's policy against individualism whilst about in public spaces, most Amaurotian are regarded by their job or station, with little that defines them from the next, save from the Convocation, all of whom are recommended for their office by a prior seat., Thusly, their people avoid conflict, as they are all found to be essential, and on equal footing.

Except... For those that have the soul sight.

It's considered a valuable gift even in Ancient times, and while Hades imparts that his is inferior to Hythlodaeus, whom he feels should have taken the seat of Emet-Selch, he yet still is able even while focused on other tasking and conversation, to immediately take note of the thin speck of a soul that is, by all accounts, identical to Azem's. (Because they are, in fact, an 8 times rejoined Azem)

This sets up for the inevitable question of, exactly how close is Emet-Selch to Azem? How intimate a relationship must they have (and not necessarily in a sexual way, this can be kindred spirits, familial, platonic, or romantic, however you feel to justify it) that his peripheral senses caught onto the Warrior of Light before Hythlodaeus had a moment to push Emet-Selch into slipping them some aether. Because I don't know about you, but when I'm out and about I don't always take full stock of everything, unless something or someone feels or looks familiar to me, in which I might do a double take, but this man straight up ZEROEs in on the WoL and you have to think... Was he expecting Azem? Was he hoping for Azem?

Now, let's dissect this from another standpoint.

When first it's spoken about the WoL's soul on the first Emet-Selch has just finished observing them just after Ryne's (then Minfilia) rescue and subsequent escape from Ranjit and from Eulmore. He notes its curious quality from afar and states that it may be of use after all. At this point in Emet-Selch's very extensive life, he's already experienced the Final Days, then the destruction of Amaurot, lost one of his best friends, as well as was [betrayed/left] by his other best friend, who was then sundered before they could even attempt to reconcile. Additionally, he has witnessed the fall of man and been tempered by a God beyond that of which we have any understanding of to this point, because it's a creation of and manifestation of the very "Will of the Star", whose heart is literally his youngest, and most innocent(to a degree that we understand) coworkers.

In other words, he is in the full throes of trauma, depression, and the hopeless burden of a life led too long.

Now, I believe somewhere in the questline, Emet-Selch reveals that once his duty is complete, his plan was to return to the star. This insinuates that, upon reviving all those lost and sundered, bringing everyone back that had been sacrificed etc, he would seek to end his life, despite finally having those he loved returned to him. The true burden of grief indeed. But I think, that he realizes that the man he has become, what he has done to bring back his people, the ones he cared about? No longer has a place in ancient society. A peaceful society, that by all accounts abhorred crass terminology such as death and disapproved of violence and hurtfulness, instead focusing on healthy debate and being "stewards of the Star". But Emet-Selch here, he has been warped by millennia of despair, by the aching of his heart, of Zodiark, who has been a voice in his ear so long it may as well be an extension of himself. He's endured so much loss, so many horrors, that he cannot conceive of that peaceful place anymore where he can peacefully coexist. He cannot resolve a place in his perfect society for himself any longer, and I think deep in his heart, it may even be shame for the deeds he had to commit. Despite his repeated attempts at degrading the Scions for their existence, calling the residents of this first "half-men" and denoting that he doesn't see any of them as "truly alive", this comes into question when the Scions and the WoL arrive in Amaurot, and the shades do not call them familiars, or wonder what type of creatures they are.

No, they are called children. They are the precious lifeblood of Amaurot. They are the innocent, the curious, the lives that must be taught and protected.

And who made this version of Amaurot?

Emet-Selch.

Now by this point you might be wondering, Suzuka, what do you mean, that's super irrelevant, Emet-Selch merely created Amaurot to be as it was in the final days, the only distinction being Hythlodaeus. And I would offer you this.

So why would this not present the same in Emet-Selch's recreation of Amaurot? Unless... Unless he knew. Unless he felt it, deep down in his own soul, after so very long, that they were his people. Broken they may be, small, and far thinner in the aether than before, but they were trying, and actively pursuing the strengths that his people once embodied.

When the WoL is in Elpis, what is everyone's immediate assumption? That they are a familiar. A non-human entity, something of the arcane, not alive, not truly, and merely a representation of their creator's imagination, knowledge, and creativity.

Which brings me to my final point, and I thank you for even reading this far because my brain has been so warped by this it runs around in my brain rent free.

Emet-Selch of ShB timeline would not have been able to allow himself to try and be with a restored Azem of his time. Azem's innocence and attachment to the people, their care, their mischievousness, their tenacity, Emet-Selch himself was too broken to reconcile with the though of that. If you are an EmetWoL shipper like myself, then you've probably approached their dynamic like this once or twice before, even if you never wrote it down, or drew it up; that only the WoL in their only seven/right times rejoined self, could possibly understand or even think to care for him with all that he has done. Because they have done things too, no? Killed hundreds, or perhaps thousands in war for freedom, watched their loved ones perish before them. Lost friends, family, perhaps even tasted death themselves. Yet, they are not alone, as he feels he is. As in reality, he is, before WoL strikes him through the chest with the axe of Light. And the only one who might even have the most basic of understanding as to why he is the way he is, is the Warrior of Light. The same soul that he saw that day in Elpis and thought was his friend, his love.

Even for just a moment.

TL;DR Emet-Selch of ShB and the WoL are meant for each other and there's a reason that crotchety old man loves them see essay above lol

[pagangoddess]

Do you see me?

In the darkest sky, I feel so alive...

[pagangoddess]

Ｔｈｅｒｅ＇ｓ　ａ　ｇｌｉｔｃｈ　ｉｎ　ｔｈｅ　ｓｙｓｔｅｍ　⚡

[pagangoddess]

Commissions are open! ♥ https://ko-fi.com/nemesisxiv/commissions