pain-neverends-blog - Tumblr blog

[pain-neverends-blog]

I don’t think anyone ever could or would love me like you but after all this time a single thought of you still makes me cry. your words have me sobbing like I just went back in time to the moment we left each other.

I wish I could tell you I’m happy even just to ease your mind but that would be a lie and I won’t lie to you ever again. I don’t think I’ll ever be happy but you should already know that you said it yourself didn’t you?

I wish you could tell me you are happy but I guess that’s just not true? Please don’t blame yourself so hard even if you allowed yourself to get to that point I clearly didn’t help you the way I should have if anything I only pushed you further and I’m so sorry for the pain and sadness.

All the wonderful things you say about me I appreciate but how do i believe them when I’ve also been told such awful things not just by you..

Maybe you’re right about the timelines maybe this one just wasn’t right. I truly hope we can both be whole and happy in another with or without each other.. I think I would also wish atleast for a do over..a second chance to maybe get it right together.

I think we’re both just stuck knowing a future without each other feels wrong. But the past together also went wrong..so where do we go from there?

Idk..but I will say to you my first and maybe to you my last. I love you too.

I know you said not to respond but whether you see it or not I had to get this out.

[pain-neverends-blog]

[pain-neverends-blog]

[pain-neverends-blog]

[pain-neverends-blog]

[pain-neverends-blog]

It made me allow things I know I shouldn’t.

It made me unable to express my emotions.

It made me accept people into my life I should have ran from.

It made me think that I’ve always been the problem.

My childhood trauma didn't make me stronger. it made me a people pleaser. it made me forgive way too much. it made me not speak when i'm supposed to. it made me an extreme empath.

[pain-neverends-blog]

May you never again get attached to anyone who isn’t for you. May you find a love who makes you laugh, never lets the flirting phase end, and gives you unquestionable loyalty. You deserve a love that calms your heart, mind, and nervous system — a love that never hurts you.

[pain-neverends-blog]

To avoid disappointment, stop seeing the good in people and start seeing exactly what they’ve shown you.

[pain-neverends-blog]

[pain-neverends-blog]

Over and over and over again

Manipulation is when they will blame you for your reaction to their toxic behaviour, but don't discuss their disrespect that triggered you.

[pain-neverends-blog]

[pain-neverends-blog]

But I don’t get a single one of those with you

I like dates. I like healthy communication. I love room to grow. I like quality time. I like reassurance. I like reciprocated energy.

[pain-neverends-blog]

“I don’t trust words anymore. I only trust actions. People can pretend to do a lot without beeing serious about it.”

— Moritz Fer

[pain-neverends-blog]

I saw it clearly and was still too stupid to get away from it

“People may not always tell you how they feel about you, but they will always show you. Pay attention.”

— Unknown

[pain-neverends-blog]

[pain-neverends-blog]

I hope you fall in love with someone who never lets you fall asleep thinking you're unwanted.

[pain-neverends-blog]

“Until you get comfortable with being alone, you’ll never know if you are choosing someone out of love or loneliness.”

— Mandy Hale