papaj--p4l
papaj--p4l
ana
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You know who you gonna have to trust right now? Papa J šŸ˜Ž
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papaj--p4l Ā· 3 days ago
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no like i’m team conrad but him ā€˜asking jeremiah permission’ to date belly was so crazy. talking bout, ā€œit physically hurts to be without her, i feel like i can’t breathe, she’s the only thing that makes me feel normal.ā€ like okay manipulation cus how the fuck is jere gonna say no now??? like he has no choice but to say it’s okay because otherwise he’s sounds like an asshole!
like obvs i don’t think it was conrad’s intention to manipulate jere, he was just sharing his feelings but it’s just so funny because you just told him you basically can’t live without her OBVIOUSLY HE CANT SAY NO?!?!? not to mention he was in the middle of taking care of medical bills for his DYING MOTHER while also being in high school…it all comes back to my dislike for susannah
jeres kinda a cunt but so is conrad so like šŸ¤·šŸ»ā€ā™€ļø
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papaj--p4l Ā· 26 days ago
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ā€¼ļø TRIGGER WARNING: CSA ā€¼ļø
My thoughts on Phia's interviews talking about Helaena's marriage as an autistic survivor and lover of Helaena:
Helaena was married aged fourteen (a child) to someone shown as sexually predacious (even described as evil by Phia), and then was pregnant not soon after.
These are all glaring signs of CSA.
All Helaena's relationships interest me and I want to explore the reality of their marriage at this time when she was a little girl. This was the first big trauma of her endlessly tragic life. Phia has discussed how Helaena puts duty before everything, and this is the root.
Helaena and Aegon are shown and described to have a distant and strained relationship, not one of mutual respect or healthy partnership. Let's explore this in the context of abuse.
Below is a script exerpt of Helaena looking at Aegon with ā€œflat detachmentā€ (disassociation) when faced with the aftermath of him raping Dyana. Furthermore, how Alicent hugs her as she realises that Helaena has endured a similar fate to herself.
Credit: Darksvster
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Now, at the dinner we see them again. But this time, Helaena makes a toast: ā€œMostly he just ignores you, except sometimes when he’s drunk,ā€ as Aegon rolls his eyes at her, implying that he neglects her as a wife except for when he needs sex (something she doesn't get a say in). He can also be seen sexually harassing Baela and Jace as Helaena sits next to him, trying to focus on other things.
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From the script we get more about their dynamic in descriptions of how ā€œlonely she has beenā€. She's so happily surprised that someone would pay her attention as Jace did. Loneliness and low self esteem are extremely common in survivors, just like with Helaena.
Credit: Darksvster
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At Laena’s funeral, referring to their betrothal, Aegon outright calls her an idiot and (in my opinion) makes a sexual ā€˜joke’ involving her. This younger Aegon also masturbates out of windows, showing the pleasure he reaps from exerting sexual power over non-consenting others.
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That isn't a sign that she was respected. Alongside Aegon's persistent characterisation as a sexual assaulter, implies that any consummation wasn't going to be consensual, but on his terms only.
She was a child forced to marry her raping brother and led a very lonely life.
Exploring this dynamic is incredibly important, and how it develops, but I don’t see the point if we don’t acknowledge the reality of this from Helaena’s point of view.
This life was forced upon her by the system, Aegon included.
Apologies for lack of a better example, but Daemon didn't consummate his marriage. It's not essential. If he respected her he wouldn't have had sex with her. He did because he wanted to and could without repercussions. It’s not nice to think about, but in this deeply patriarchal society, he has an immense power over her that she does not also have over him. He was abused, just as Helaena, but he also abuses her. It is not as simple as them both being equal, because they are not. In daily routine, he can frequent brothels and assault the help, she has to take care of the children and do whatever is asked of her.
It hurts and troubles me to see people act like Helaena isn’t a victim, especially with what we're shown.
At 14 she was forced to marry her rapist brother and used by him for sex. No child could consent to that.
I'm not saying that this is everything their dynamic was or will be, or that she hates him in any way, but just that this is at their core. It purposefully parallels Alicent's child marriage to Viserys.
Please be kind. I'm not attacking but trying to shed light on this. I'm trying to open up this discussion to what Helaena's perspective was and to do some honest scene, relationship and character analysis.Ā 
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papaj--p4l Ā· 1 month ago
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Sad Aegon II Targaryen
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papaj--p4l Ā· 1 month ago
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Acotar is the only bookish fandom I’ve been in where you can read a canon scene from the book, I mean read the passage word for word directly from the book and post a screen shot of the actual canon text and people will still try to say no that’s not canon or your making up canon. Wild. I’ve never seen people try to talk out of canon as much as some people do in this fandom.
I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again… a lot of this fandom goes by their opinions and what they want to happen rather then what’s actually in the books.
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papaj--p4l Ā· 1 month ago
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Haunting me
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Summary: The Dance is over and you get summoned to the Red Keep to be the nursemaid to the little Queen Jaehaera. However, the more days pass, the more you notice a presence always lingering around you, watching from afar.
Pairing: Ghost!Aegon II Targaryen x Reader
Word count: 7042 words
Warnings: Post Dance of Dragons Era, talks of death and war, underage marriage (Jaehaera and Aegon III), Reader is described to be female and to have long hair, my attempt at mystery, ghost stuff, angst, fluff, brief suggestive content (it’s about a tapestry), no mention of Y/N
Notes: This is for the wonderful @bearwithegg ! It took me a long time to post this, but I hope you’ll like it! Likes, comments and reblogs are always appreciated. Enjoy šŸ’›
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It has been months since King Aegon Targaryen returned victorious to King's Landing and reclaimed his father's throne.
Months since the Dance of Dragons was officially over. Rhaenyra is dead, the war that tore the Seven Kingdoms apart is finally over.
And then the unthinkable happened. The king was found dead in the carriage that brought him to the Great Sept. They say he passed out as peacefully as if he were sleeping. His wine had been poisoned, but no one could tell for sure who the culprit was.
Rumors say it was Lord Larys Strong. Others say it was Lord Corlys Velaryon. Still others say it was the king himself, to end his suffering.
But one could never say with any certainty.
A few weeks later, Aegon III, son of Rhaenyra, would be married to little Jaehaera, the king's last living child. They were children, innocent and frightened, who did not know the meaning of the oaths they were speaking there.
They were both no more than ten summers old, which was why they could not rule. The council took on that responsibility for them. But that did not mean they did not need someone at their side.
The Dowager Queen, Alicent Hightower, was out of the question. It was rumored that she had gone mad in the tower where she had been locked after the death of her last son. Her servants were said to hear her weeping at all hours. And when she was not crying, she was always talking about the time in her own youth when she read to the old King Jaehaerys.
Little Queen Jaehaera was all alone. The girl had no mother, no father, brother, or dragon. The war had taken all of that from her.
She needed someone by her side to take care of her.
And that was exactly why you were called to court. A young lady from a small, rather insignificant house, who had barely survived the Dance.
It was a great honor for you, as you had never dared to imagine ever seeing the Red Keep with your own eyes.
Even though times were bleak, the harvests left much to be desired, and many villages lacked young men, you were overjoyed to have been given such an opportunity.
A small ray of hope in a hopeless age.
The Red Keep was not what you had imagined.
The halls were cold and empty, the walls gray and colorless, and the people were taciturn and seemed plagued by the ghosts of the past.
Little Jaehaera quickly grew on you. Her large, amethyst-colored eyes were always sad and empty, but your heart swelled every time you made her smile.
She never laughed, but sometimes, when you told her stories from your village, you could see her eyes sparkle or the corners of her mouth lift slightly.
It was a beautiful sight that you guarded like a treasure.
You did not have much to do with the young king, as the king and queen often went their separate ways. You were also protective of the girl. The mere thought that something could happen to her sent shivers down your spine.
You did not want to know how the Dowager Queen felt. On the quiet nights when the moon was high in the sky and not even the trees moved, you could hear her weeping. It was loud, tragic, and broke your heart in two.
It must have been terrible to lose four children and three grandchildren in such a cruel way within the span of four years. The first victim was little Jaehaerys, the little queen's twin brother. Then Helaena, Aemond, Maelor, Daeron, and finally Aegon.
Her first and last.
She was only able to bury two of her children. The bones of the Kinslayer were lost forever at the bottom of the lake in front of Harrenhall, as were the bones of his mount, the mighty Vhagar.
In the villages surrounding the God's Eye, there is said to be a kind of test of courage for the younger people. They are supposed to swim to the bottom of the lake and see the bones with their own eyes. Some left a gold coin as tribute, others tried to destroy the final resting place of the prince and the dragon by kicking the bones underwater.
Depending on whose side these people had been on in the war.
Helaena and Aegon were given their graves next to each other in the Sept, so they could comfort each other even in death. It was the Queen Dowagerā€˜s idea.
You had no connection to any of this.
You had not known any of them, had not ever seen any of them with your own eyes, and during the war, your house had been neutral. Your father did not care who warmed the Iron Throne with their behind, but only that his people were healthy and well-fed.
You had not wanted to choose either. Both sides had been right somewhere, but all that was quickly forgotten the moment the first blood was shed. After that, the flame became a walking inferno, devouring everything and everyone who approached this chaos.
You were glad you were not consumed by the fire.
"Have I already told you the story of Mattis the Foolish?" you asked Jaehaera after you had put her to bed and tucked her in.
The little girl shook her head and hugged her stuffed animal—a small cat—more to her chest. A hint of curiosity flashed in her eyes as she looked up at you.
"Well, listen carefully then. Mattis was a young man from the village I come from. He was well-read, handsome, and always quick with a joke. The young ladies idolized him, and every boy wanted to be his friend. Mattis was sure that the gods would favor him and that everyone would like him. And so he set out on a long journey to confirm his belief."
Jaehaera pulled the blanket up to her chin. "And what happened to him?"
"On his way, he encountered a group of bandits who had kidnapped a woman. She called for help, and Mattis the Heroic, as his friends always called him, rushed to the aid of the fair maiden," you continued, and you could see how the little queen became more and more curious with every word that left your lips.
"And then?" she asked you in a quiet voice. She never spoke aloud.
"He had confidence in his ability to befriend anyone, even vicious bandits. He approached them and struck up a conversation. The men fell under his charm, laughed with him, and toasted him. In the end, they gave him the woman for two gold coins and wished him luck on his journey."
"Oh no," murmured the little girl, already anticipating what was coming.
"No sooner had he set off again, the lovely maiden on his arm, he was suddenly stabbed in the back. The woman had pulled out a dagger, robbed him, and returned to the bandits' camp, while Mattis died miserably in the dirt. He had no idea that she was one of them and that she had only been out to rob good souls like him," you continued, brushing a silver strand of hair from the girl's face.
"And because he put his trust in a stranger, he is now called Mattis the Foolish?" Jaehaera asked you with a smile.
The story was dark, yes, but she liked it. You had learned that quickly after you read her a fairy tale once and she handed you a ghost story from Old Vaylria the next evening. It seemed so as if she liked the morbid and dark, which was why you had to come up with a new story every night that reflected that.
"Or simply because he believed that everyone would be his friend because he did not know any different. And what does this story teach us, darling?" you asked her as you slowly got up from the edge of the bed and smoothed out the wrinkles in your nightgown.
"That you should be careful who you put your trust in," she answered with a nod.
"Exactly. And now sleep well, my little one," you whispered to her before placing a gentle kiss on her forehead.
You were already halfway out the door and on your way back to your humble chambers to finally get some good sleep after your long day when you heard her voice again: "Do you... Do you think ghosts exist?"
You immediately stopped and turned to your charge, your eyebrows furrowed in confusion. What strange questions she sometimes asked.
"Ghosts? They are a nice thought, are they not? Your parents and siblings are watching over you, Jaehaera. One way or another," you assured her with a nod of your head.
"Good night," she murmured, turning away from you, whereupon you sighed softly and closed the door behind you.
As you walked through the corridors, you occasionally nodded to one guard or another. They all seemed tired and as if they had seen too much. The war had left its mark on everyone.
Not paying attention to who might be passing you at this late hour, you suddenly bumped into someone.
"Forgive me," you said immediately, but the man simply nodded and disappeared around the next corner without another word.
It was not until several seconds later that you realized... that he had silver hair.
But that could not be true.
The only people in these halls who still had such features were the young royal couple, and they were already in bed.
Later, you told yourself that it must have just been a trick of the light. That the man's hair had simply been ash-blond. But as you looked around the Great Hall the next morning, as most people were getting breakfast or servants were getting it for their lords and ladies, you noticed that you did not see a man with ash-blond hair anywhere.
So who was this man?
You did not want to ask around. Not because you did not want to find out, but because you were not good at talking to people. Jaehaera was the exception because it was your job to take care of her and because she was an innocent child.
Most of the time, you just felt like everyone was judging you, even if you had not done anything wrong. You could feel their eyes on you, and you hated it. You never knew why. You had always been like that. Like the young Queen of the Seven Kingdoms, you too preferred to be alone. You were better off alone.
You firmly believed that you had only imagined this man. After all, you had been tired, and the girl had just said something about ghosts before you left her alone for the night.
It certainly would not happen again, you thought.
It had been two moons since you bumped into the silver-haired man that night. You had not seen him again. No sign, not even a hint.
By now, you were quite certain that your eyes had indeed been playing a trick on you. At least, that was what you thought until you suddenly saw him again.
It was one of the few days in which the young King Aegon III was supposed to listen to some of the people's petitions. Of course, he did not do this unsupervised. He actually just sat on the throne and greeted and bid farewell to the citizens of the Small Folk who spoke, while one or sometimes two council members did the actual speaking and made the important decisions.
Hidden in the shadows at the side of the throne room, a figure leaned against the cold, wet wall of the Red Keep. His skin was as pale as the snow falling in the north, his hair as silver as the moon, uncombed and falling to his shoulders. He wore a dark green doublet, which he left open. Beneath it, a blue shirt and black trousers were visible. His black boots were dirty, and a heavy gold chain hung around his neck.
No one seemed to notice him. No one spoke to him.
You could almost say he was not there at all.
But you saw him. You saw him, and you decided to approach him with quiet, cautious steps. He did not seem to notice you, and you had to gather all your strength to finally clear your throat.
"Excuse me?" you said quietly, careful to keep your voice low so the other men in the hall would not hear you. Their focus should remain entirely on the throne.
The silver-haired man—and even in this light, you could see that it was definitely silver, not just pale blond—turned slowly to you. His eyebrows were furrowed, and he looked like he had just seen a ghost.
Perhaps he was not used to being spoken to so simply?
"I think that we have met before," you spoke when he did not say anything. "Two months ago. I bumped into you in the night."
He blinked before something like recognition suddenly flashed in his violet eyes.
Violet eyes, silver hair, pale skin... was he a Targaryen?
Somehow, he even reminded you of Jaehaera. You could be wrong, of course, but they had almost the same eyes. Large, sad, and looking as if they carried the weight of the world on their shoulders.
"You…" he cleared his throat. "You remember?"
His voice was rough, as if he had not used it in a long time, and the look in his eyes was one of caution. You could not imagine why. You did not look like a princess or one of those fine ladies who took themselves too seriously. Your dress had hardly any embroidery, and your jewelry was silver, not gold. Unlike many others, pomp and wealth were not things that captivated you.
"I wanted to apologize again. It was late, and I was not looking. I hope you will forgive me," you explained your reasons for approaching him again.
He blinked and looked at you for a few seconds before finally nodding his head: "It is alright. Honestly, I also did not pay attention to where I was going."
You thought you remembered his gait being very purposeful, but you decided not to press the issue. He seemed to you like a man who, like a bat, avoided sunlight when it came.
"You do not look like someone who would make a request," you said with a tentative smile tugging at the corners of your mouth as you nodded your head toward the throne.
His lips parted slightly, and he turned slightly toward the monstrosity built so many years ago by Aegon the Conqueror himself. A true sign of royalty, and apparently, it also had a mind of its own. People still spoke of how steel rejected the false queen and accepted her half-brother Aegon. For many who witnessed the event, this had been a sign at the time.
"Believe me, my lady, I have many requests I could make. I merely do not wish to frighten our young king," he answered with a grin, which made your knees go weak for a moment.
"Why would the boy be afraid of you?" you asked him instead, genuine curiosity in your gentle tone.
The man in front of you simply shrugged and leaned back against the wall behind him. "I am not sure. I just have a feeling."
You nodded your head and looked at the small king sitting precariously on the Iron Throne, which was far too big for him and almost swallowed him. Silver hair, violet eyes, pale skin...
"Are you a Dragon Seed?" you asked him curiously, turning back to him, only to see that the man had disappeared.
You quickly scanned your path to the left and then to the right, but you found no sign of him anywhere. How could he have run away so quickly? You had not even heard footsteps. What was wrong with you?
Who in the Seven Hells was this man?
This question haunted you in your sleep for the next few weeks. With each passing day, you believed more and more that you were simply going mad. Sometimes you thought you could see him out of the corner of your eye, but whenever you turned around, there was nothing but cold air.
Even with Jaehaera, you found no peace. The little girl bore such a frightening resemblance to the stranger that you once accidentally asked her exactly how many brothers she used to have. It had been foolish and thoughtless of you, as she immediately turned away from you and disappeared into her chamber to cry instead.
She would not even accept your lemon cake as an apology, and she would not listen to any stories in the evening. In fact, she even forbade the guards from letting you in when you tried to wish her goodnight.
You felt terrible.
One afternoon, you summoned the courage to ask a member of the council what the former Targaryens had looked like. The answer you received was anything but satisfactory. They had only told you exactly what you already knew. Silver hair, pale skin, amethyst-colored eyes that sometimes varied in color and intensity, and one of them had an eye patch. You were aware of all of this.
The one person who could still help you was the Queen Mother, Alicent Hightower, but she was rather ill at the moment because she apparently had the flu.
So you were left empty-handed.
That was until you met him again one night. You were standing on the balcony of the chambers you had been assigned when you entered the Red Keep. They were apparently the old chambers of the mad Queen Helaena, who took her own life by jumping from Maegor's Holdfast.
At the time, you had asked why you had been assigned these chambers, since you were no one of great importance. After all, you came from a relatively unknown house, and your sole duty was to look after the queen. You had expected servants' quarters, not such opulence.
The moon stood high in the sky, bathing the world in a silver glow. Otherwise, the night was warm, and the sky was cloudless. It was peaceful.
It would have been so easy to find peace that night, but you found none.
Dressed in a pale green robe and a white nightgown, you leaned against the stone railing and looked down at the city below. Your hair fell in gentle waves down your back, and only now did you begin to understand how long you had been within these walls. When you left your home, your hair had fallen to your elbows, and now the ends touched your lower back.
Although the night was windless, you could suddenly feel a light layer of gooseflesh spreading across your arms and a chill running down your spine. There was really no reason for that until you suddenly heard the sound of heavy boots behind you.
You immediately turned around and gasped in alarm when you saw the silver-haired man who had been on your mind for months.
"By the gods! How did you get in here?" you asked him, placing a hand over your heart. It was racing as fast as a hummingbird's wings.
The stranger, who did not seem much older than you, seemed as surprised as you for a moment before he seemed to recover and straighten his shoulders.
"You doors were open," he said simply.
"No, they are not," you replied, letting your gaze sweep over him. You had never before considered whether he might be dangerous. You had been too fascinated by the mystery he represented.
A small laugh escaped him, and you could feel your heart clench for a moment.
"Oh, I am pretty sure they are," he said before leaning against the stone railing next to you and looking down at the city as if he were its king. He certainly looked like one.
Confused, you blinked and looked back down at King's Landing. Lights were still burning in some of the windows, but most seemed to be fast asleep. Of course, that did not apply to the residents of the Street of Silk, where life blossomed at night like you had never seen before. You had only been there once, and you did not want to repeat the experience.
"And why do you just walk into someone's chambers without even knocking first? Especially since it is the middle of the night! I could have been asleep already," you told him, and you could feel a shiver run down your spine at the thought.
Not because he might have seen you sleeping, but rather because you would not have known.
"Believe it or not, beautiful, I honestly have no idea."
You were about to respond when he turned back to you, and the expression on his face was so frighteningly real that it swallowed the words in your mouth.
The moonlight fell on his features in such a way that it made him seem almost inhuman. Divine, even. He looked like a fallen angel who did not know what path to take. He was beautiful in a way that was hard to put into words.
"Who are you?" you finally asked him that one question that had burned itself into your mind as if Balerion himself had enclosed you in his flames.
A smile played around the corners of his mouth, but it quickly disappeared. Instead, he turned back to the city, and a sigh escaped him. Soft and barely audible, but you heard it because it was otherwise eerily quiet. Other than your breathing, you could not hear a single sound.
"Trust me, you do not want to know," he finally answered.
A single gust of wind whizzed through the night, making the already tangled strands of his hair appear even tangler. It almost looked as if he had last combed it years ago.
"But I do," you replied, taking a step closer to him. Normally, that would have cost you a lot of courage, but that was the last thing on your mind. The only thing you wanted were answers.
"I do not wish to scare you," he said with a sigh. "You would not understand."
A huff of air escaped you: "Trust me, I understand a lot of things. I am not a foolish woman, for a change. I read a lot."
For a second, you thought you saw something like recognition in his gaze, but it vanished as quickly as waves come and go at the ocean.
"You are the one who takes care of my—I mean, the one who takes care of the queen, right?" he asked suddenly, at which you just blinked for a few seconds. That had been a particularly quick change of subject.
"I— Yes," you answered him with a nod of your head.
He nodded too, and while people danced and drank in the distance, the balcony of your chambers was enveloped in a silence that was not exactly unpleasant, but was not entirely pleasant either.
Too many questions remained unanswered for it to be pleasant.
"How is she?" he asked you, his voice sounding as if he knew so much more than he let on. He sounded vulnerable, almost sad.
At first, you wanted to ask him why he cared. The answer was already on the tip of your tongue, but you swallowed it down at the last moment. You did not want to fend him off. No, you just wanted to know more about him. About this beautiful, mysterious man who had been on your mind ever since the first moment.
"I cannot say. Sometimes she smiles, sometimes she cries, but mostly she is just quiet. I try to be a friend to her as best I can, and maybe even a kind of mother figure, but it is not easy."
Once again, he nodded his head, and you could see him slowly letting this information sink in, absorbing it. It seemed like it meant something to him. Like he knew her.
"I am grateful you are with her. If she were alone... she would fall apart from all this," his words were spoken with such certainty that you could be sure of one thing, too. He was not a stranger. He was exactly where he belonged. In these halls, in the Red Keep.
You took another step closer to him, until your elbows were almost touching. You expected to feel the warmth of his body, but as you stepped closer, you felt absolutely nothing. As if you were speaking to the air.
"Who are you?"
He opened his mouth to answer you when there was a sudden, frantic knock on your door. You stood there for a moment, but then reluctantly turned away from him and hurried to the door.
They were locked from the inside, as you said. There was no way he could have entered these chambers from the outside without you noticing.
Your hand trembled as you unlocked and opened the door, only to see Jaehaera standing before you. Barefoot, wearing only her nightgown, her hair loose.
"I had a nightmare," she said without you even having to ask.
You immediately crouched down and placed a reassuring hand on her shoulder. You were just glad she was talking to you again, even though you had made the mistake of asking her about her brothers.
But just as you were about to hug her to tell her that everything was fine and she did not need to be afraid, her eyes suddenly widened. You had never seen her like that before.
Without a word, she stormed past you and toward the balcony.
"Jaehaera!" you called after her and quickly jumped to your feet, almost tripping over the ends of your robe.
"Where is he?" she shrieked, causing you to look at her questioningly.
"Where is who?" you replied, and then you noticed that your mysterious stranger had once again disappeared without a trace. Again.
"Daddy! Where's Daddy!?" she cried, and you were at a loss.
"Daddy?" you repeated. "Sweetheart, your father is no longer with us. You know that."
But the little queen would not listen. She pointed to the spot where the silver-haired man had just been standing, and thick crocodile tears began to run down her soft cheeks.
"No, you do not understand, he was here! I just saw him! He was standing right here!"
The coin fell. You grabbed the edge of the door to keep from falling.
"By the gods..." you whispered, disbelief in your voice.
Jaehaera wept, and you understood.
The silver-haired man was not just anyone. It was Aegon II Targaryen, King of the Andals, the Rhoynar, and the First Men. And a man who should most certainly be dead.
Weeks passed, and you had not seen Aegon again. To protect Jaehaera, you told her that she probably saw a shadow coming from the curtains and that her mind was playing tricks on her. Of course, she would not accept that, and once again she ordered her guards that you were not allowed to enter her chambers.
She was angry and sad, and you understood why, even if you could not yet explain it all.
That afternoon, some of the tapestries were to be replaced. Many were more than ten years old, and the Small Council had decided to have new ones hung. In your opinion, any change was a good thing. They apparently still wanted to suppress the past—the war that had been less than two years ago—as best they could.
Because the queen did not want to see you, you helped removing the tapestries in one of the castle's many corridors. Thank the Seven, you did not have to hang any of the new ones, because that would have required a ladder, but it felt good to tear the old ones off the wall.
Simply doing something violently helped you release some of the frustration that had been building up inside you over the past weeks and months, like a gigantic wave that threatened to bury you at any moment.
"Just coming and going, ridiculous," you muttered, while you tore one of the tapestries off the wall, which clearly depicted a sexual position. Like the other ten that were already scattered on the floor. "I mean, yes, he was the king, but that is still pathetic, is it not? Oh, who am I kidding? The man is a ghost. He can come and go as he pleases."
"If I did not know you are talking about me, I would have said you were very angry about a lover," a familiar voice suddenly spoke behind you, and you froze completely.
Slowly, you turned to him, still holding the tapestry. Aegon the Elder was standing not far in front of you, leaning against the wall with a grin on his lips that almost took your breath away.
"Ever done that?" he asked teasingly, pointing at the red carpet motif.
Your eyes widened and you looked down at the motif. It showed a woman twisting in a very unnatural way, pleasuring a man while another sat between her thighs.
"What do you take me for?" you quickly retorted, heat flooding your cheeks, turning them the color of a ripe apple.
A laugh escaped him, loud and genuine, and for the first time, you saw his eyes sparkle. He seemed happy.
"I am only jesting, my dear. I did not expect you to be involved in such activities before. Although... are you married?" he asked curiously, glancing down at the motif on the carpet for a while longer, as if fascinated by it.
The way he licked his lips made your heart leap in your chest, and you quickly tossed the tapestry to the others already scattered on the floor. His smile turned into a pout.
"No, I am not married yet," you said, and immediately he beamed from ear to ear again.
"Something any man likes to hear."
Without being able to stop yourself, you raised your eyebrows and crossed your arms. "Oh yeah? And what about ghosts? Do they like to hear that too?"
The radiant sparkle left his eyes for a moment, and instead he sighed and turned away from you to take another closer look at the remaining tapestries that adorned the walls. You followed him without saying a word.
Suddenly, a chuckle escaped him, which sounded like music to your ears.
"I tried that! Before you ask: No, it didn't work," he explained, pointing with his outstretched arm at a particularly bold motif.
"Oh..." was all he got in response from you.
Then you cleared your throat in what you hoped was a good attempt to change the subject: "You seem so happy today, Aegon."
He did not turn to you, but you could see his shoulders tense for a moment before finally relaxing. "You know my name."
"I have told you before and I will tell you again. I am no fool, Your Grace," you said, sounding perhaps a little more serious than necessary. "She saw you."
"I know," he shrugged. "And that is exactly why I was with her just a moment ago."
Your eyes widened and your mouth opened and closed for a few seconds, like a fish's.
"You—you were with her? With Jaehaera?" you asked, just to be sure.
Aegon continued down the corridor, and from the way he walked, you could sense what he had been like when he was alive. Lively, playful, and perhaps a little arrogant.
You would have liked to have known him when he was still among the living.
"I just said that. Yes, I was with her. We talked, and I was able to tell her some things I did not get a chance to."
"I hope you gave her a long embrace, because she deserves it. You are her father," you said, letting your eyes roam over him. He looked so real. As if you only had to reach out and you could touch him.
You could see the Adam's apple moving in his throat as he tried to swallow the lump in his throat. He seemed so human, so alive, that you wanted to pull him into the throne room and show everyone that the king was still alive and that there was no reason to treat two war-torn children like puppets.
"Believe me when I tell you, I would have loved to. But I cannot."
"You cannot? What does that mean?" you asked him cautiously, yet still curiously.
Aegon did not answer with words, but simply held out his hand, as if he were asking you to dance. Slowly, you raised yours as well and extended it. Your fingers could almost touch; you even imagined to briefly feel the warmth of his skin, but where flesh and bone should have been, there was nothing but air. Your hand simply slid through yours.
Your shoulders slumped, and for a moment, your eyes filled with tears. Here stood Aegon, former king, caught between life and death.
"But at least I do not look like a roasted chicken anymore," he jested, trying to lighten the mood a bit.
You tilted your head, but he was already explaining before you could even ask the question: "My brother pretty much set me on fire with Vhagar. My whole left side was burned, my leg was useless, and my cock did not work either anymore."
"Your— Oh. I am sorry, Aegon," you said, wrapping your arms around yourself, not knowing what else to do with them.
You had once heard that the king loved wine and women more than anything else and spent more time on the Street of Silk than in his castle. So it must have been terrible for him to suddenly no longer be able to do the things he loved most. And sex, after all, can be very liberating in stressful times.
"Oh, never mind, dove," he sighed, shrugging as if it did not matter to him, but you could see the pain was still there, lingering. "I am over it."
"No, you are not," you said with a smile.
"Guilty," he grinned, turning around. "Where are you from, anyway?"
"House Butterwell of Whitewalls," you murmured, unsure whether you wanted him to hear it or not. Your house was not one of those that immediately conjures up images of a large castle and riches as far as the eye can see. No, quite the opposite.
The silver-haired man, whose name you now knew, tilted his head, and you could see him thinking hard. "My dear, I have to disappoint you, but I have never heard of your house."
"I know," you said simply, shaking your head as a gentle blush rose in your cheeks. "That is what most people say when they ask me, which admittedly are not many."
But the former king simply shrugged and reached out as if to brush a stray strand of hair from your face, but his hand slid through you once again. Disappointment settled in your stomach.
A part of you wished he could touch you. You wanted to know how his hands would feel on your skin, if his lips were as soft as they looked, and if his fingers would be warm or cold.
These thoughts were dangerous, but you could not hold them back anymore. Just like the feelings that blossomed within you and were directed at him. A ghost.
But he smiled, and you knew you were lost.
From that day on, you spent almost every single day with him. Sometimes Jaehaera was even there, but often you were alone.
He often came in the evenings, when most of the lords and ladies had already gone to sleep and you were wrapped in a comfortable nightgown. You would spend hours telling each other things. Sometimes from your own lives, sometimes they were completely irrelevant and had nothing to do with you or him at all.
Aegon now knew everything about you. He knew your favorite wine, your favorite color, silly childhood memories you had confided in him, as well as your dreams and desires. You knew his entire life. His difficult childhood, his youth drowned in wine and women, and his adulthood, which had been no less difficult.
In a short time, you had grown more fond of him than any other man you had met before, and Aegon was sure—for once in his life—that he knew what love felt like.
He did not say the words, and neither did you, but somehow you both knew.
You could feel it in the way he was always there exactly when you needed him, and he knew it in the way you looked at him. As if he had personally hung the stars in the sky and made them shine just for you.
You had resigned yourself to the fact that he could not touch you. If he wanted to, he would say so instead. Imagine me placing my hand on yours and squeezing gently.
He calls you dove. You call him king.
And when he was with you, the world seemed to be in order, even if you could not explain it.
That was until the first letter reached you. Your presence at court had attracted the attention of other houses and their sons. All of them were alliances that should be considered. All of them would give your house a bigger name and fortune, and your father would be able to provide more for the citizens. Your house would finally gain prominence.
Your father and mother were excited and happy, expecting you to make a suitable choice. A charming young man who would marry you and to whom you could give heirs. The fate of so many young ladies.
They could not have known that your heart had long since been taken, and that the only man you wanted and with whom you could imagine a life was no one who could make all this possible for them.
For the man you loved was long gone.
He found you sobbing in your chambers. You were sitting at the foot of the bed, a cup of wine in one hand and a letter in the other.
He was no fool.
You were a beautiful woman and of marriageable age. It was only a matter of time before the first men crawled out of their holes to feast on you.
It was not fair. But what in this world was fair anymore?
"Who is it?" he asked you in a calm voice, hoping he could reassure you.
"I don't know," you sobbed. "Some Lord Manderly."
He knew the name, but it probably would not be the old man he was thinking about. That would make the marriage proposal almost insulting. You were in the prime of your life, and that old fart already had one foot in the grave. The bastard.
"Aegon?" Your gentle voice pulled him out of the raging thoughts he was currently trapped in.
"What is it, sweetling?"
"Do not be mad. I will not choose Manderly anyway. My father at least gave me the freedom to choose one of the men. All that matters to him is that I choose at all," you explained, wiping the salty wetness of your already shed tears from your cheeks.
A long sigh escaped the Ghost King before he unceremoniously plopped down on the bed next to you, burying his face in the soft sheets.
Your scent clung to them, and he wished he could just lean against you, hold you in his arms, and promise you that no one would ever take you away from him.
You smelled of freedom, of wildflowers, and fresh soap. Apparently, you had bathed just an hour or two ago.
"And look, my king. Jaehaera will need her nursemaid until she is at least fourteen summers old. That is still a while, and I do not think she would let someone replace me," you said, placing a hand on his shoulder.
Aegon froze.
Your eyes widened.
Your hand was on his shoulder. It did not just move through it, it was on him. Warm and alive.
Aegon did not hesitate for a second, but sat up and reached for your hand, squeezing it gently, as he had said so many times he would.
"You... You can—"
"Touch," he finished for you.
Not a second later, his lips were pressed against yours, his hands on your cheeks, his thumb rubbing small circles into your soft, flushed skin.
His lips were warm, soft, and so alive that you could feel the first tear rolling down your cheek. Then the second, and then the third.
"Don't cry," he murmured against your mouth before teasing your tongue with yours.
"You are crying too, Aegon," you replied, and you heard him chuckle softly.
You leaned back to catch your breath, but he was whining and trying to press another kiss against your lips, but you placed a finger on his lips to stop him.
"How is that possible?" you asked him with a genuinely happy smile on your lips.
"I have no idea, dove. But if I do know one thing, it is that I want to enjoy this evening to the fullest," he answered, his arms wrapping around your waist.
"To the fullest, you say? What about my suitors?"
The grin on his handsome face only widened before he buried his head in the crook of your neck.
"Forget them. Your king commands it."
He pressed a kiss against the sensitive skin of your neck, and you knew he was right.
For one evening, real life could rest. For one evening, the line between life and death had been blurred, and you had never been happier.
And Aegon knew this might be the last night he would ever touch, which is why he vowed to savor it to the last second.
Until he was no more.
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The Dividers are from the wonderful @zaldritzosrose !
Taglist: @bey0nd-1he-stars @sassypain @hisfavegirl @dahaenatargaryen @sylasthegrim @danytar
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papaj--p4l Ā· 1 month ago
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"Our son, Aegon... he's..."
She looked like a ghost of herself. Her voice sounded weak and tired, as if she were merely a shadow of her former self. Maybe she was. And he couldn't do anything about it. All of it was his fault, and he hated himself for it.
Aegon didn't say anything, his vision getting blurred from the tears. No. It couldn't be true. It had to be an awful dream. He was going to wake up any moment now and see his little son's face and give him another pony ride. He was going to hear his laugh, and everything would be...
He felt Helaena's cold hand on his, and that was finally what broke him.
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"You should let Jaehaera stay with a nurse. Or let our mother take care of her," he suggested in a monotone voice, devoid of any emotion. Too deep in his own sorrow, oblivious to hers.
ā€œNo,ā€ Aegon looked up, noticing the changes in her eyes - the determination. ā€œI’m not letting our daughter alone. She will stay by my side. I won’t let anything happen to her.ā€
He couldn't and didn't want to argue with her.
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"Bring me their heads," she spoke, her voice barely whispered; nevertheless the atmosphere in the room changed in an instant.
Alicent looked at her daughter as if seeing her for the very first time.
"So be it," he replied, his voice not the one she knew before.
Aegon had become something different, and he was resolute in carrying out her order.
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papaj--p4l Ā· 2 months ago
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papaj--p4l Ā· 2 months ago
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EMILY CAREY as ALICENT HIGHTOWER House of the Dragon | 1.01 "The Heirs of the Dragon"
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papaj--p4l Ā· 2 months ago
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EMILY CAREY as ALICENT HIGHTOWER House of the Dragon | 1.01 "The Heirs of the Dragon"
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EMILY CAREY as ALICENT HIGHTOWER House of the Dragon | 1.01 "The Heirs of the Dragon"
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EMILY CAREY as ALICENT HIGHTOWER House of the Dragon | 1.01 "The Heirs of the Dragon"
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papaj--p4l Ā· 2 months ago
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House of the Dragon (2022-) ↳ 1.05 ""We Light the Way" (dir. Clare Kilner) ↳ 2x08 "The Queen Who Ever Was" (dir. Geeta Patel)
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papaj--p4l Ā· 2 months ago
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HOUSE OF THE DRAGON — 2.07 | "The Red Sowing"
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papaj--p4l Ā· 2 months ago
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RED in Season 2 HOUSE OF THE DRAGON (2022-)
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papaj--p4l Ā· 2 months ago
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Clingy prince
The rest of the night after his unfortunate fight with his brother, prince Daemon could barely sleep. His chambers where too quiet, to still and that invited the nightmares over to play with his mind.
Nightmares of dark times rising above them, and he woke up with every strike, with every time he saw his brother's face grow old, and Daemon was shaken to his core for said visions. He then, before even thinking of grabbing anything to eat or his belongings to move back to Dragonstone he fled from his bed, half-armoured and with his heart still pounding furiously, he ran through the halls of the red Keep, looking for his brother.
Viserys was already up before the rise of the sun, he was already dressed and was heading up to the council hall. Yet, his mind was replaying his conversation with Daemon last night, feeling his anger craddling in his stomach as he remembered what his brother said in that pleasure house, the way he was informed Daemon was celebrating his own rising, laughing and drinking with his whores and lickspittles about his dead babe and his late wife
Viserys was still chewing at his bitterness, when he suddenly heard footsteps approaching him, and before he could react, Daemon was atop of him, not attacking, punching or trying to hurt him as he espected... but hugging him, clinging at him as if he feared he could dissapear into the thin air
"DAEMON! WHAT IN THE SEVEN'S NAME-" he shouted as he almost fell to the ground with Daemon still squeezing himnas if he wanted to make sure he was real. His brother's weight was more than he ever expected, and the armour he wore, was even worse.
Yet, the fact that Daemon hugged him tightly, made him realize he was, in fact, shaking and clinging to him with all of his might as if Daemon was afraid, he used to do that when he was frightened whem they where children, his legs crossed behind his back as if he didn't wanted to let go
"sorry" he whispered, his voice a thin thread against his ear, his voice shaky as he hugged him tightly "please, don't be mad at me... I'm so sorry, Viserys"he whispered in a threas of voice as he clinged tighter into him, burrying his face on his shoulder. Viserys didn't expect that sincere apology, he expected Daemon to be angry, to feel wronged.
But he wasn't complaining, he sighed in confusion as he stepped backwards to find some equilibrium, supporting his brother's weight as best as he could before grunting from the effort and acomodating him the best he could
"Daemon, you are no longer a child, brother... You are way too old for this!"he scolded him with a warm voice, remembering when they both where smaller, and when Daemon was as light as a feather for him to lift and carry with him. Now, he felt like he was being crushed by a fully grown dragon, he huffed, trying to lift his weight "he's getting heavier" he thought, but he held his brother closer when he felt his shouder wet and heard Daemon sobbing quietly in his shoulder, he didn't understand why Daemon was crying, but he yielded... As he always did for him. As he aleays did for his rouge brother. Viserys sighed and squeezed him back, closing his eyes
"very well" he sighed while patting his back "i forgive you"
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papaj--p4l Ā· 2 months ago
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HOUSE OF THE DRAGON — Countdown To Season 2 Event Day 4 • Parallels
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papaj--p4l Ā· 2 months ago
Note
I want more on Nyx and Tam's daughter please
Oooh, I haven't written any Tamlin's daughter stuff in a while!
I LOVE Nyxlin, but I also really love the idea of an ACTUAL enemies to lovers/ Romeo & Juliet/ Sleeping Beauty-esque story for Nyx and Tamlin's daughter.
The potential angst is just *rubs hands together like a fly* chef's kiss
SO HERE YOU GO!
also have this, I pretty much spent all of my time making this on canva instead of writing the prompt šŸ˜‚
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"Aoife!"
She lifted her head. Her pale eyes narrowed at the Illyrian youth gracelessly picking his way through the gnarled undergrowth of the forest. She tucked the slim tome under her arm and rose to her feet.
"It's you."
Nyx stumbled to a halt before her, smiling bashfully, "It's me."
"I told you never to come back here."
"But I needed to see you again."
Why?
"My father would not be pleased to see you here." she said instead.
His smile widened, and her pulse quickened.
"Neither would mine. But," his fingers touched at her wrist, and she easily pulled away.
"What they don't know won't kill them."
She raised her brows, "'Knowing' isn't the crime. Trespassing in Spring, and dallying with the first born daughter of the High Lord without a chaperone, is."
He dropped his head with a chuckle.
"We're dallying?"
Aoife's mouth fell open, and she scowled furiously, stepping backwards.
"We are not doing anything," she threw over her shoulder, "Our parents are enemies."
"But we are not our parents!" he challenged.
There was a whoosh of air and she turned, only to be faced with nothing.
Good, she told herself, only to yelp in shock as she spun back round to Nyx flapping gently in the air before her. He landed back on his feet.
"We are not our parents," he repeated. "And their crimes are not ours to bear. Can you honestly say that you would still reject your heart if my parents were not who they are?"
She stared into his eyes.
"Nyx," her voice broke on the name,"I- I can't-"
He didn't say a word. Only reached out to take her hand in his.
Aoife's breath froze in her throat, and she turned her hand over, twining his fingers with hers.
Nyx's hand tightened around hers, and her heart cracked.
"Perhaps in our dreams then?"
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