r3v3r1e

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While we're on the topic of Phil Kaye and Sarah Kay... here's another poem that surprisingly resonates with the Circle kids...

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one of my favorite pieces. spoken and written.

"When Love Arrives", Sarah Kay & Phil Kaye

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"okay" means fine. completely fine.

you're not happy, but then you're not sad either. not upset, not anything. you're okay. it's okay.

you're fine.

but some things, even though you're okay with it, still kinda rubs the wrong way. it's okay, but deep down, there's ... something.

and you don't want to go into it anymore because you'd like to think that you're above it. you've gone past it.

and you just want to be bothered by it anymore. you just want to go on your way, move on, and continue to heal.

this is just like that Saturday when hubby met with a group of friends that included his ex(-mistress) from five years ago.

he told me and i said " i don't think that's a good idea. " but if you really want to, go ahead. far be it from me to stop him, or anyone, from doing what they want. because that is not me as a person.

like a Jedi-in-training, i searched my feelings and i was not upset. i was okay.

but it brought back memories. those that i'd really rather not remember.

it brought back feelings. it brought back the hurt.

i've gotten over these so i know that a night out with my besties is all it's going to take.

i'm okay. i will be okay. just would rather not have remembered the hurt.

some things, and people, are best kept in the past.

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Isn’t it beautiful,

That no matter how far we fall

We always fly out of our sorrows

Stronger than we were before,

Lifted up by the hands of time

Intertwined with love and healing.

S.a

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18 May 2017.

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🎅🎄🎁☃️

@neil-gaiman this is amazing!! Merry Christmas!

[r3v3r1e]

And then one day, you realize you've moved.

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“She didn’t need to be saved. She needed to be found and appreciated for exactly who she was.”

— j. iron word

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12:03 am. Tuesday. November 1. I have just turned 42.

A lot has happened that I have wanted to write about but just wasn’t able to for various reasons, but mostly because I just couldn’t find the time or the words.

One of the biggest and most recent events in my life was leaving my former company.

December 22, 2021, was my last day with a company I worked with for 10 years. They were mostly good years, some even great. I learned a lot during my stay and I loved what I did.

But, not unlike romantic relationships, I found something else. A side job instead of a side piece.

It’s funny looking at it from that perspective given that something similar happened in my marriage.

I don’t know if it was my personal relationship that echoed in my professional relationship, or if my professional relationship mirrored my marriage.

Whichever way it was, my husband found a side piece and I ended up with a side job. His side piece left, and in the middle of figuring out whether we will pick up the pieces or just move on from each other altogether, I found a side job.

He was repentant and wanted to work on our marriage. I decided to leave a company I have been loyal to for 10 years.

These events didn’t happen side by side. My husband came out with his affair a year or so before I started moonlighting.

But it’s funny how in both situations I felt my world explode and crumble around me. It was the same process of deciding whether to stay or let go, which pieces to keep or throw away.

In both times, there was the same doubt and fear: what if it doesn’t work out? What if I am left empty-handed?

The same questions my husband asked himself while he was debating whether to keep his new love or stay with the old are the same questions I asked myself before deciding to leave my former company.

It’s been a year since I left and it’s been several years since his affair.

There have been changes in our dynamics. Our relationship is pretty much the same as it was, but there is now a recognition that we are no longer the people we were at the start of our relationship. We have grown.

Today, I am 42. I have grown from and learned much from both experiences.

Life is not any more difficult or easier than it has been before, and I am thankful that I am still here, trying to make the best of it.

I am grateful for the mundane and the day-to-day, as I am for the special and the extraordinary.  

I am thankful more than ever to the people that are still with me, despite all that I am not. My often wayward husband included.

Today, I Drink Wine.

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For our 16th, we went on a road trip on his new big bike.

There were no I-love-yous, but there was plenty of togetherness.

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Never allow someone to be your priority while allowing yourself to be their option. / Never settle for anything less than what you deserve. It’s not pride, it’s self-respect.

Mark Twain / Chanakya (via michaelbogild)

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As always, as ever. . . . . #awakenatallcosts  #mirahadlow #instapoetry #instapoet #poetsofinstagram #instagood #poemsofinstagram #fighters #poet #poetsociety #hustle #unrequitedlove #rmdrk #abuse #writingcommunity #wordsmith #drunkpoetsociety #spilledink #motivation #lifequote #wordporn #quoteoftheday  #wordswithkings  #wordswithqueens #inspirationalquotes #writerscorner #writerscommunity #writersofig #poetscommunity #writersnetwork

[r3v3r1e]

You have far more talent, recourses, creativity, intuition, compassion, and strength than you are personally aware of right now. It’s just that your parents and teachers didn’t tell you that very often — or even at all for some people — which makes it very easy to conclude, doesn’t it, that all the above-mentioned qualities (and so many others) are either nonexistent or not much to talk of. You are astronomically wrong, of course, and I would suggest, brothers and sisters, that you gradually, day-by-day, step-by-step, realize how true my words are, by trusting yourself more, loving yourself more, and asserting yourself more.

(via michaelbogild)

[r3v3r1e]

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“Eh Bes, ano ba ‘yung ”process”?

“Eh ano nga ba? May nakakaalam ba kung ano iyang process na yan?

But I think that’s the crux of it, isn’t it?

It’s not the process. It’s the trust that you are on the right path. The faith you put in yourself and in your ability. Trust that the steps you’re taking, no matter how small, are leading you to your goals.

Be it a journey of healing, self-discovery, or recovery. Trust in the process.

Believe in yourself.