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[ramblingsofanusha]

The fight

She was pacing.

Walking the length and breadth of her room.

The phone in her hand was at the receiving end of her anger until the real culprit manifested himself.

She hated it when he did this!

“Pick up the phone!!! AAAAARRRRGH”

She flung the phone on to her bed and lay down staring at the ceiling.

The tears in her eyes welled up. It blurred the chipped paint pattern she was staring at and merged…

[ramblingsofanusha]

Corner table

“You can read people? How does that help?” she asked

“I like to observe. It helps with the craft. Acting that is.” he always maintained eye contact while speaking.

They were sitting at the corner table away from the crowd. The bar towards the left. The bartender was busy trying to get the orders right during happy hour. She found it strange that they called it ‘Happy Hour’. People drowning away…

[ramblingsofanusha]

The great pandemic reset

The great pandemic reset

What do I write about that has not already been articulated better?

It’s been over a month since I have found myself confined to my home.

Things I have not succumbed to include:

Baking banana bread

Taking on a TikTok dance challenge

Completing an online course

Doing something that can be considered productive

  Instead, on most days, I find myself doing the following:

Working longer hours in a…

[ramblingsofanusha]

Insomnia

I am awake.

I haven’t been sleeping.

In fact, I don’t remember the last time I really slept well.

It shouldn’t be that hard to fall asleep.

I have counted 685,432 sheep.

I have tried the Aromatherapy candles and oils from Bath & Body works.

I have tried reading. Meditating.

I switched off my phone. When nothing worked, I turned it back on.

Australian bushfires. The fascists in India.

Iran.Syria. A…

[ramblingsofanusha]

Healing

These pains you feel are messengers. Listen to them.

Rumi

“I don’t love you. I don’t think we should be together.”

Sharp. Clear. The words kept echoing in her head.

She had been through it all. Three years. Every situation played over and over in her head. She thought about everything she could have done differently. She had tried so hard to fix this. She pleaded desperately. She cried.…

[ramblingsofanusha]

3am

The party is over. The night of dancing, flirting and general debauchery to escape the loneliness of one’s existence.

Fake compliments and live exchanged just for a night. Till strangers become strangers again.

This commonplace phenomenon in our times is not new. They call it by many names. One night stands. It’s complicated.

What about conversations?

I want conversations that touch one’s soul.…

[ramblingsofanusha]

Narrative of a heartbreak

I walked into a room. My room. It was my house.

It was still a blur.

I caught a glimpse of my face when I entered in the mirror. The eyes were dead. My face was a piece of art in black mascara and salty tears.

I didn’t know what to do.

I went to the water bottle Nd took a huge gulp of water, finishing the bottle.

It was over.

How does one describe being heartbroken?

I felt a million pieces…

[ramblingsofanusha]

The sea at midnight

The sea at midnight

Silence.

Sometimes you don’t need words to feel a connection.

All you need is some good company, a bunch of crazy people and the sea.

After a night of hanging out, talking and laughing.

Three strangers who found a moment in common by the sea.

We didn’t need words.

We were all going through different life experiences.

But in that moment, there was healing.

There was hope.

[ramblingsofanusha]

Letter to the ones coping

Letter to the ones coping

Hi,

Are you doing okay?

It’s a rather funny question. But, has anyone asked you this today – How are you feeling?Do you need help? How can I be there for you today?

If no one has asked you these questions yet, let me ask them.

Sure, it must have been a rough day. Things didn’t go according to plan.

There was sadness, hurt and anger.

There was that need to run away and hide.

For a few moments you…

[ramblingsofanusha]

Dawn

It’s dark, the sky.

Darkest it can ever be.

The sun isn’t out yet.

Although there is faith that it will be out soon.

It will be out to drive away the darkness.

The storm is raging. The rains have picked it’s moment.

Does the sky rejoice or let go of its flood of tears to find healing?

It’s a storm raging.

The rains don’t stop.

The earth drowns in the tears of the sky.

And as the crying grows, the…

[ramblingsofanusha]

Joy

Look inside.

Look within.

There is a smile.

A laughter.

Lost.

Ready to spring to life.

Waiting to live.

Never forget.

You are the light.

You are the love.

You have the universe within you.

[ramblingsofanusha]

Chewing Gum

Chewing gums.

They are annoying.

No. Not when you chew them for that fresh breath or other marketing gimmick we fall for.

Chewing gums are annoying when they decide to hold on to your precious new heels because the emotions of being spat out and discarded is too much to bear.

It takes a moment to take that wrong step. And the next few minutes are spent in agony to try and remove it from one’s…

[ramblingsofanusha]

Blur

Distant voices arguing in the background.

Why can’t I hear what they are saying?

The light seems brighter than usual.

Why is everything slow, yet fast at the same time?

Why do I feel like I am floating through this?

Nothing makes sense!

What am I even doing here?

My heart. It’s beating really fast. It’s getting heavier.

My breathing… It’s getting harder to breathe air.

Air.

Why can’t I breathe?

W…

[ramblingsofanusha]

The Rain

“I love the rains!”

“How can someone love rains? It’s always so wet and gloomy. Look at the sky! The roads are a mess. The traffic is bad.”

“Not everything has to be gloom and doom! The feel of raindrops on your hand. The sweet lingering smell of the soil after the first rains and the best part…”

“The only thing I’m glad about right now is the fact that we are indoors!”

She smiles.

“Do you want…

[ramblingsofanusha]

Within

This.

Now.

Here.

This is precious.

This is where you hear your heart beat.

Look inside.

Look within.

There is more courage than fear.

There is more love than hate.

There is more empathy than anger.

There’s a storm outside.

The journey outside is only momentarily disrupted.

The journey within has only begun.

[ramblingsofanusha]

Healing

It had been ages since they met. Two best friends from college catching up after life took them to different countries and continents.

“It’s been so long! I missed you so much!”

“I’m glad we are FINALLY getting to meet.”

“It’s much better than all the long-distance chats….” turns to the waiter…”I’ll have a cold coffee.”

“A cappuccino for me please. Thank you.”

“So how are doing? I know you have…

[ramblingsofanusha]

10 minutes

“Are you sure you want to drop me home?” she asked, not quite certain how she felt about it. “The driver can take me you know. It’s just 10 minutes away.”

“Yes. I get to spend 10 extra minutes in your company.” he smiled.

“And you think those 10 minutes will improve your luck?”

“It’s better than wondering what if all my life.”

“Alright. You can get in the car.” she smiled. She had just met him.…