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rielmayer · 3 months ago

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Astarion is a strong character. In any case and regardless of what happened to him.

I've seen statements online like “AA fans call UA is weak” (maybe you've seen that too). Of course, this source will never run dry. They always invent something new, twist the story, distort the meaning of their opponents' statements to the point of impossibility, in general, you can't get bored. If earlier I naively thought that their “arguments” were based on lies about “Cazador 2.0”, “loss of soul” and trying to prove that “AA doesn't love Tav” (this nonsense, of course, is alive and will live forever, as long as there are those who desperately need “right messages” sent to them in the form of a sexually attractive vampire boy, but in such a way as to say that “he is happy” with the torments of hunger and in eternal darkness). Well, one must, I guess, somehow justify “I don't let him ascend” as the only right way and still remain “white-glove” at the same time.

So one should start claiming that those who help Astarion Ascend are supposedly calling UA weak. And prove that UA is strong. Well, yes, Astarion is a strong person. There's nothing to prove, he has an iron rod. The fact that he was able to survive and preserve himself, keep his mind, his personality after 200 years of slavery and torture, an internally weak person is not capable of that. How long did it take for Theon Greyjoy in Game of Thrones to be broken by Ramsay? Velioth broke Cazador, but Cazador couldn't break Astarion. Astarion survived in conditions in which a person, who has always lived in increased comfort and does not understand what reality is (who may consider Astarion's rational desire to ascend and be able to live a full life and protect himself and his beloved as “moral weakness” or “fear”) simply could not have survived. Or would have wised up quickly.

And the fact that Astarion didn't have someone around to help him see his scars during the ritual doesn't “make him weak” or change his character. It's just that after the Ascension, Astarion starts to show off that strong character of his openly, and if denied, Astarion is too depressed. “I just feel numb.” “I'll have to. But that doesn't mean I have to like it.” - Even from this line you can understand how hard it is for him, in addition to having to accept that he will never get what he longed for, that he will no longer have a full life, but instead will have to live “some half existence, hiding in the shadows for the rest of eternity”, he also has to play a role, thank Tav and make up stuff about “breaking the cycle of power and terror”. Because “I am - well, not ‘happy’ with how things turned out. But this does feel right.” Astarion has a much harder time in the UA situation than AA, but he doesn't lose his fortitude and in the epilogue he talks about looking for an opportunity to walk in the sun again. And when he finds it, there will be nothing stopping him anymore, no “heroes” around. Unless he's in a romance with Tav, because his love for Tav is really his weakness and vulnerability. Either way, Ascended or not.

It would be better for them to try to prove where Astarion's consorts are calling HIM weak. It's impossible not to see that he's feeling bad in UA's route. The inability to read (or, as usual, the intentional misrepresentation of their opponents' words) probably equates the fact that the Ascension ritual frees Astarion from physical ailments and weaknesses, the fact that Astarion is certainly made stronger (physically and magically) by the ritual, and the fact that those who help him along the way consider his “version” of the UA to be a weak and insufficiently “toxically masculine” man. As well as the “ah, they're talking bad about UA”, they “don't give UA a chance”, as if, holy shit, there really are a couple of “hot vampires” in the game, one of whom is perfectly “toxically masculine” in order to sexualize him, and the other not so much, and here's this poor sensitive guy getting berated and not given a chance. I should probably get used to this type of thinking though, I mean, they hate Astarion, if he's Ascend, and yet call themselves fans of him. When a person has a split inside into “two different people,” it's called dissociative identity disorder, and what do you call that case where they “split” the other person? I guess with such a syndrome of “Astarion's dissociative disorder” it must surely seem that those who hate Redemption Arch (as a playable feature, as a path, as a choice, just hate playing it) must dislike Astarion himself along the way and consider him weak.

Yes, Astarion himself (not his consorts) on the UA route considers himself "I'm still nothing, aren't I? Just an expandable frail spawn who will burn to a crisp soon enough", he hates what Casador did to him. "Unmaking what you made me" (Astarion's response when Casador asks him what he's doing).

Without the ritual, Astarion will forever be what Cazador did to him, it will be incorrigible, he will forever be a spawn. And says this line to Astarion then when Tav asks: “All right, what do you need?” Astarion: “I need your eyes. In a manner of speaking.” Before the ritual itself, without any attempt at persuasion, Astarion believes that Tav will help him.

And to say that we think Astarion is weak because of it - well, that's like me saying about a person with a disability, who was not allowed to be healed (for example, in a cyberpunk setting, they were not allowed to install an implant for “ethical reasons”, which not only would have healed them, but made them stronger than a healthy person) that they feel bad about their illness and with the implant they would be stronger, and a devout believer against cybernetization would claim that I was insulting that person by calling them sick and weak. I wonder who would be “sexualized” by fans of such a character, helping them heal and get an “unethical implant”? Cyborg? Why I hate the UA route, I wrote here. But Astarion himself is a beautiful and strong character, he copes even with it. And handles it the way a strong man handles it, a strong man who “just feels numb”. The only weak character I have contempt for in this version of the game playthrough is Tav, not Astarion in any way.

Astarion, who “heroically” rejects the ritual and sympathizes with those 7000 spawns, can only exist in Astarion Origins, where the player creates “their Astarion” by shaping the character's personality as they wish. There is no such Astarion in a game with Tav/DU, there is an Astarion who was denied help in a ritual. Astarion can only make one choice - wish such a Tav to die screaming (as he wishes every companion who doesn't help him) or accept it. Astarion's Choice.

Here's what Astarion thinks of these spawns he's “supposed” to sympathize with:

“These people died years ago, trust me on that. All that's left are feral spawn, desperate for blood.

If we release them, how many people will they kill? Tens of thousands? Hundreds of thousands?”

Astarion without Tav, who no one helped Ascend, won't let the caged spawns go free:

“As for those wretches in the cells - if I don't get my freedom, neither do they.”

Astarion breaks the staff and dooms the spawns in the cages out of anger, out of the pain of anger at his not being allowed true freedom, and let them suffer as well.

“But if they die and I ascend, I won't have to rely on the parasite to walk in the sun. I'll be free - truly, completely free. Isn't that what you want?”

And… The pain and doubt in his voice when he asks: “Isn't that what you want?” Astarion has one major weakness and vulnerability, and that's Tav. And not just because he really needs Tav's eyes right now and their connection through the tadpole to see his scars. Tav is the only person he loves. Tav is the best thing that has happened to him after two hundred years of torture, pain and humiliation. Perhaps this love of his, how much he loves, and how much he is attached to Tav, and how much he needs love and acceptance from Tav, is a consequence of his trauma. And his approval of that persuasion is not an approval of Tav keeping him from Ascension. It's an approval that he believed Tav's motives, he understood, why his loved one wouldn't help him. Why the one he loves so much won't let him become truly, completely free, won't help him start living a real, full life. Tav convinces him of their motives, and if he believes that they are not doing this out of malice, that it is really in their heads, in their value system, what they say is true and they believe it, then Astarion agrees to become what they believe in. With pain in his eyes and a full understanding of what he will have to sacrifice for that love and that belief. He doesn't know what a real relationship is or what true love looks like. He doesn't think he deserves better. He was used as a tool, he was tortured, no one ever cared about him, and he could only learn to survive - Astarion begins to connect with the world for the first time after two hundred years of slavery and torture. AA has a heartbreaking line, “I was trying with you, you know. In the only way I can try.” (if you reject his proposal, in a dialog three days after that, and such pain in his eyes and such an expression on his face, it's just impossible to watch).

UA has a bitter line, “I will endeavor to please” in response to Tav's cruel line, “Then don't mess it up” in the graveyard scene - he will still try to earn even the love of someone who is incapable of love.

Because he doesn't think he deserves better. He even gives some fake theatrical approval, when Tav wants to “add” Halsin to their relationship, when Astarion himself certainly doesn't need any Halsin. And he clearly feels bad about that relationship. And he agrees to have sex in a brothel because of Tav, he's experiencing PTSD, but he won't even rebuke Tav for it afterward with a single word. He'll forgive the cheating with Mizora. He will never even think about the fact that such a Tav doesn't deserve him. He thinks himself unworthy of Tav's love, he idealizes them. He won't think about the fact that the very desire for “payback” or “redemption” for a loved one is not love. That the desire to “fix” someone and “make them better” at the cost of their suffering is not love. Anti AAs very rarely mention the most important thing in their posts, much more important of course is the topic of “power”, where what “message” and how much “masculinity” is needed for their favorite “toxicity”. Hunger, sunshine, feelings “the arousals and appetites of man”, even his own reflection to see, after all, these are usually either unworthy of mention or presented as something like “challenges,” which Astarion, of course, heroically wants to take on.

The line of Persuasion for Tav looks exactly like this. “I want you to live a life you're proud of” (how I wish Tav would burn in the sun afterward and Astarion would stand there and watch it). “You can't be proud of this.” Translated as: “I don't care how you feel or how you feel, be the way I want you to be, you can consider yourself a good person for that”.

If Tav betrays and abandons the UA in the finale, he tells them, “How dare you! After all I've done for you - after everything I've sacrificed!” And what else did Astarion sacrifice for Tav except one thing - the chance to find true freedom, sunshine, and feel alive again?

UA takes Tav's attitude for love and accepts the suffering he will have to go through because of it. And behaves the way his “fixer” wants him to. He doesn't fully trust and thinks Tav might leave him, he's afraid of losing Tav and he's not sure about this relationship. AA thinks “you are degrading yourself by staying with him,” but he is happy, if Tav agrees to be his Bride and after receiving this true confirmation of an eternal bond, he starts to trust, opens up. AA suffers greatly, when Tav rejects him and this bond. That said, he expected this… It confirms his opinion of himself, that he, as he is, is not worthy of love. This goes nowhere in the case of refusing the ritual, Astarion adjusts, hides the real himself. He's more honest and frank with Tav in the non-romantic epilogue, in the romance he's silent about how he really feels about having the sunlight taken away from him again. And about how he will do anything to get that opportunity again. AA in the romantic epilogue, after 6 months with a loving consort is calm, confident and happy.

Also a very interesting “argument” - all of Astarion's problems in the Spawn state are better than the “illusory” benefits of Ascension. And everything is bad for the Ascendant, for he is “morally weak”. In general, I wonder how it is - how can concrete physiological facts be illusory?

Hunger, the sun, the reflection in the mirror, the taste of food and wine, “the arousals and appetites of man will return to him”. The benefits of Ascension are illusory, just as the sun itself, air, water, the fact that the Earth is round and revolves around the sun is illusory, as are many other things that simply exist by themselves as fact. As exist all things that exist regardless of anyone's belief or disbelief, simply because they exist. “Moral weakness” is just that, an artificially created concept, it is illusory. The very concept of morality is illusory, morality has been different in different eras (sometimes even radically different). Morality is a social construct that applies specifically to the society that accepts this particular morality, morality is a tool of management, regulation of people's behavior. Morality is simply the notions of right and wrong, good and bad, and the set of norms of behavior derived from these notions that are accepted in a particular society and at a particular time. One cannot be “morally strong” or “morally weak”, one can accept/not accept this or that form of morality, conform or not conform to this or that notion of morality. “Astarion doesn't conform to your ideas of morality” would be true, but ''morally weak'' would not. Morality doesn't exist, it's just some conventional characteristic that serves to evaluate certain things in a particular society in a particular historical period. Releasing 7000 hungry spawns is so “moral” that in terms of realism in DnD, it should have resulted in bloody chaos throughout the city. A bloody night in Baldur right after defeating the Brain, when the city is already severely weakened by the massacre with the Illithids. Perhaps there would be no Baldur, just ruins, where anarchy reigns and gangs of spawns rule. “Moral lessons” and “messages” sometimes don't mix well with realism and logical calculation of the consequences of certain player actions.

Astarion is not a dummy or a toy, to be “personality changed” by Tav. He has his own personality and his own desires. Astarion does not become “good” or “chaotic-neutral” if he was not allowed to Ascend, Astarion remains “neutral-evil” (if we give value to such a concept as alignment). It is not alignment that makes a person happy. But alignment is a convenient system to describe a character's worldview, and there are certain rules that affect a character's alignment change in DnD. In order for your action to affect your alignment change, you must have freedom of choice and decision, there must be no insurmountable circumstances that prevent your character from doing what they would like to do. The fact that Astarion basically can't Ascend on his own, unless someone helps him see his scars, makes refusing to do the ritual (or helping him do the ritual) a choice that affects Tav's alignment change, not Astarion's. If Larian wanted to show Astarion's change of alignment, there would have been an option in the game for him to Ascend without Tav's help (drawing his scars on a piece of paper, for example), and then, if Tav had convinced Astarion to refuse, or he himself, like Shadowheart, could have done it, Astarion could have changed his alignment. It's especially funny to read the “arguments” that since Astarion didn't redraw his scars, when Tav drew them in the sand, that means he didn't want to Ascend. They would have made up their minds - whether they revitalize the character to such an extent, that he himself “off-screen” decides, what to do in the story, or whether the main thing is the “message” and what the authors wanted to say (I have only one opinion on this - it doesn't matter who “wanted to say” what, but what is important is what is really said and shown in the story of the game). In this case, Larian most likely wanted to make an “arch of redemption” for Astarion (which could be combined with his past as a corrupt magistrate from EA and possibly look like “payback” for his past sins). Whether by choice or due to the demands of those back in the EA, who wrote to them demanding they “fix Astarion”, it doesn't matter so much anymore. And as a romance bubblegum for players, who play just to have fun, and they need a sexy male companion for a romance, they won't pay too much attention to his well-being, emotions and will calmly eat up the “bittersweet” ending as a good one, if they're told so, this story arc also fits very well. That said, this storyline fits logically with the evil companion's poorly completed quest (for the world “good”, for him “bad but not fatal”) and doesn't break the character's IP. A logical commercial move - after all, the romance of Ascended Astarion is unique and unusual, it's not “mass-market”, and besides, whining about morality in games, “evil is wrong”, etc. has been in vogue lately, we all know that, and creating an evil character without “moral options” to “fix” him might not have been a very good decision in terms of taking into account the subsequent network hysterics about him. And in order to make the “redemption arc” possible and logically plot-wise fitting with Astarion's character without violating his IP, the best option was to take away his ability to make his own choices, leaving him with only the option to accept this “redemption” or leave the group. This blends with his story (his scars) and gives additional story beauty to the romance of the Ascended, when his beloved becomes his eyes and they go through this ritual together (“I did. We did”).

Astarion's ”strength of personality“ does not depend on whether he has undergone the ritual or not. Astarion always remains himself. It's just that in one case he is “with all the masks, lies and deception still included” and in the other “no masks, no lies, just the truth because he has the confidence to push his arrogance in your face without fear”. Helping him in the ritual or refusing to help him characterizes Tav, not Astarion.

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