say-hi-to-the-southpark-gang - Tumblr blog

[say-hi-to-the-southpark-gang]

MYSTERION: so there’s been these rumors going around.

MYSTERION: like the whole thing with kyles hat.

HUMAN KITE: I’d like to clarify that one is definitely a rumor.

HUMAN KITE: just because I don’t take off my hat doesn’t mean that I’m hiding vape pens under it.

MYSTERION: mosquito! Turn that off.

HUMAN KITE: Dude I got in trouble for that. i don’t know who’s making these rumors but now toolshed isn’t allowed outside.

MYSTERION: Yeah like I was saying I think professor chaos is behind this.

MYSTERION: the coon saw him in the computer lab today

COON: yeah dude he was in the computer lab cackling and holding his hands up?

COON: to summon lightning?

COON: i don’t know, but he was on some hot chicks YouTube videos.

HUMAN KITE: yeah that’s what stan got in trouble for!

HUMAN KITE: apparently he commented negative comments on lordes music videos?

MYSTERION: dude. Mosquito.

[say-hi-to-the-southpark-gang]

CLYDE: ohhhhh tea!

TWEEK: oh- my favorite thing about Craig?

TWEEK: d-do I have to only pick one?

CLYDE: yes dude, it says favorite.

TWEEK: w-well I guess he’s got really nice eyes and a smile...

TWEEK: But uh-I guess he’s kind of like coffee, he can come off as mean and bitter to some people but-

CRAIG: Hey guys, kenn- mysterion came in through your window.

CLYDE: oh.

CLYDE: OH.

CLYDE: shoot sorry guys, Gotta go.

CRAIG: make sure you turn that off, this is confidential stuff.

—TO BE CONTINUED—

[say-hi-to-the-southpark-gang]

CLYDE: uhm wow you guys are really persistent.

CLYDE: no

CLYDE: my crush isn’t someone within my friend group.

CLYDE: I’m more into the laddiessss.

CLYDE: Sorry Tweek

TWEEK: ngh-that’s fine.

TWEEK: Ah-what usually calms me down?

TWEEK: Craig is usually helpful w-with helping me calm down. Coffee mostly, people keep giving me fidget spinners...

TWEEK: those don’t do much b-but it helps with something to mess with when I- when I need to do something with my hands.

CLYDE: that’s what she said

TWEEK: wha-what..?

TWEEK: Uh-I also find origami to be fun to do...I-I’ve gotten pretty good at making different-ack-different things

CLYDE: oh so that’s why one day Craig was holding a shit ton of paper ninja stars for you.

CLYDE: that’s cool.

CLYDE: also I try not to let popularity control my life.

CLYDE: though I would say I’m pretty well known.

CLYDE: our gang is kind of the most well known boys.

CLYDE: I think I kind of resemble a leader type??

TWEEK: w-well...I would say Craig is more of the leader....

CLYDE: no. Definetly not.

CLYDE: Craig is too emotion driven.

TWEEK: I don’t th-think you know what you’re talking about...

[say-hi-to-the-southpark-gang]

TWEEK: I’m alright now, I-I May have overreacted just a little-just a little bit back there

TWEEK: b-but I’m good now, you guys seem nice.

TWEEK: the shop is nice

TWEEK: It-gah-I usually get really friendly customers

TWEEK: this one guy started screaming at me about his drink once-Agh it was because-he said it didn’t taste like real coffee? S-something really vague...

TWEEK: s-so he splashed his coffee all over me and I haven’t seen him since.

CLYDE: aw dude what the hell?

CLYDE: people like that suck..

CLYDE: oh there’s one for me, any sports??

CLYDE: hell yeah.

CLYDE: I’m on the jv football team with stan.

CLYDE: and do I like anyone..?

CLYDE: that my friends, is confidential.

CLYDE: I would be stupid to share that information over the Internet. So your just going to have to guess.

[say-hi-to-the-southpark-gang]

CLYDE: oh dude.

CLYDE: we all live like really close to each other

CLYDE: so I can just casually walk to one of the guys houses

CLYDE: like we’ll do stupid shit on the week days

CLYDE: not like Stan’s Gang stupid

CLYDE: but like reasonably stupid.

CLYDE: like we’ll walk around town playing the penis game until someone gets mad at us. Then we have to high tail our asses to hide at starks pond. Then just hang there for the rest of the night.

TWEEK: “h-hey are you still doing that blog-thing?”

CLYDE: oh. Hey tweek

CLYDE: you okay man?

CLYDE: it’s uhm recording right now

CLYDE: just so you know.

TWEEK: i-it’s...fine. Sorry-ngh- I didn’t mean to freak out so much earlier...

TWEEK: Craig talked to me about it, I don’t r-really mind it- that much anymore

CLYDE: oh, yeah it’s chill. You don’t have to, but a lot of people were asking about you?

CLYDE: you can answer some questions, it’s actually kinda fun.

TWEEK: o-oh really...alright i guess.

[Tweek is available for asks]

[say-hi-to-the-southpark-gang]

CLYDE: Wendy's Gang.. lemme think.

CLYDE: that's like.

CLYDE: Bebe, wendy, Heidi.. Nicole??

CLYDE: I honestly wouldn't compare them to us boys..

CLYDE: the girls at our school are honestly so nice.

CLYDE: my thoughts though..?

CLYDE: well Wendy is like the leader type.

CLYDE: she's the brains, she's in control.

CLYDE: she's just so smart.

CLYDE: how ever, I think she gets kinda offended too easily.

CLYDE: bebes the cool one.

CLYDE: she's like the second leader.

CLYDE: But shes a lot more laid back.

CLYDE: I really like her hair too. Like wow. It's pretty.

CLYDE: have you noticed all the girls smell really nice too?

CLYDE: heidis sweet? I think..

CLYDE: uhm I kind of have a dark memory of her

CLYDE: I don't like to picture cartman making out with people.

CLYDE: it hurts my head.

CLYDE: dude Nichole is so chill.

CLYDE: she's like token.

CLYDE: But without the constant reminder of how stupid we are to him.

CLYDE: it's great! I'm not sure if token and Nichole are still dating...

CLYDE: But He was so happy when he was with her.

CLYDE: it was cute.

[say-hi-to-the-southpark-gang]

CLYDE: stans Gang?

CLYDE: oh boy, ask Craig and he’ll go on 3 hour rant.

CLYDE: uhm.. I like to give them more credit then Craig does.

CLYDE: But theyre still assholes.

CLYDE: Cartmans an asshole. He smells like asshole.

CLYDE: he’s fat, and sounds like fat.

CLYDE: his skin looks exactly like what you’d think of when you hear the word “chapstick.”

CLYDE: he doesn’t care about people’s feelings.. and he thinks before he talks...

CLYDE: BUT KYLE

CLYDE: kyles all talk.

CLYDE: he thinks he’s the bees knees.

CLYDE: everything he says is so egotistical filled it’s annoying.

CLYDE: try shutting him up for 2 minutes...

CLYDE: then stan is always so pissy.. which is more of a pet peeve I guess.

CLYDE: he’s just so negative. And kind of rude?

CLYDE: I don’t know if he means it, but he always sounds kinda spoiled..

CLYDE: hmm kenny isn’t that bad.

CLYDE: he’s kinda gross.

CLYDE: But in a really cool kind of way.

CLYDE: besides the fact that he smells..

CLYDE: Sorry Kenny.

[say-hi-to-the-southpark-gang]

CLYDE: heyyy guys

CLYDE: the d dude here.

CLYDE: d for Donovan...

CLYDE: I’m here live in my closet.

CLYDE: because well... tweek was getting real freaked. Then Craig got mad.

CLYDE: so Craig yelled at me to go somewhere else.. I’m just gonna answer some questions now..

CLYDE: oh.. uhm. Hm well. We’re all freshman.

CLYDE: Tweek had his birthday in August. Loser. He’s the youngest.

CLYDE: he just turned 14.

CLYDE: poor guy..

CLYDE: Craig’s 15th birthday is soon.. like a month away..

CLYDE: ok I’m alittle rusty in my drawing skills..

CLYDE: but you can see Craig’s excessively long legs.. I think that’s maybe why he acts so “high up”

CLYDE: then tweeks the shortest.. poor guy

CLYDE: I think something about.. the coffee stunting his growth..?

CLYDE: I don’t know. Token described it in a very smart way..

[say-hi-to-the-southpark-gang]

TWEEK: AGH!! You can’t prove that! You could be some sort of RUSSIAN SPY -or-or something-trying to learn information about all of us! I bet Clyde’s set us all up so the government can hack into our PHONES just by figuring out our personal information and what we look like! Gah! W-well I don’t let that happen! I cover my phone cameras with tape so the government can’t see what I look-agh-like and spy on ME-I bet you guys already know where we live and what my favorite kind of COFFEE is!!

TWEEK: NOW GET THE CAMERA AWAY FROM ME!!

CRAIG: I’m doing pretty good.

CRAIG: They kicked me out of Go Fish for being a ‘’Nancy negative‘’ about not having a complete fucking deck of cards.

[say-hi-to-the-southpark-gang]

CLYDE: Oh, I got both of them at some nerdy anime convention that Token made us go to.

TOKEN: Who are you talking to?

CLYDE: My millions of worshippers.

JIMMY: I-it’s a blog.

CRAIG: What, he actually started that thing?? I thought he was just really tired last night.

TWEEK: W-wait are you actually recording us? I don’t want millions of people to see my face!!

CLYDE: Yeah, we’re live. Say hi Tweek.

TWEEK: AHHH!!

[say-hi-to-the-southpark-gang]

CLYDE: Thank you!! I worked very hard on my hair this morning!

CLYDE: also...about Craig and Tweek?

CLYDE: I always had a feeling that Tweek was keeping something to himself?

CLYDE: Maybe that’s why he’s so shakey...? Like he’s gonna EXPLODE!

JIMMY: It was pre-pr-pretty obvious th-that they liked each other.

CLYDE: Also i never thought Craig was the type. It was a little weird that he didn’t crush on me, since I’m his best friend.

CLYDE: I MEAN JUST LOOK AT MY HAIR TODAY!!

[say-hi-to-the-southpark-gang]

CLYDE: I don’t think it’s on? The lights red, I think there’s a problem.

JIMMY: R-r-r-red means the cameras r-r-roll-oll-r-rolli... on!

CLYDE: Oh.

CLYDE: Hi. I’m Clyde Donovan. You may not know me. But I’m just your normal, underrated, overly attractive underdog.

CLYDE: When I found this site. I was like.

CLYDE: BOY this is stupid.

CLYDE: But then I realized. Wow I’m pretty interesting. Who could be better to blog than me??

CLYDE: Oh and jimmys here for some questions too.

JIMMY: h-h-h-Hey. Clyde needed my assis-assis-a- help setting up the camera! So send him s-so-some questions!

CLYDE: YEAH!

CLYDE: So how do I turn it off?

[Ask box is now open!]