A Life Worth Living - Chapter 3
TW for verbal abuse/manipulation
The walk home was one made in shame and fear, furtive glances sneaking up at the man. It'd been halfway there before Tomura actually decided to speak up and say something. "...Your name isn't actually Goemon, isn't it, Mister?"
Damn it, he was totally going to give himself away at this rate, but the allure to curiosity his younger state of being gave him was inescapable. You'd think you'd be able to advise your younger self otherwise? No, being young fills you with so many impulses that you don't know what to do with, you just have to go along with them sometimes.
It isn't that he hadn't learned how to filter himself, it's that often by reflex, humans speak before they think. It's a pretty dangerous habit of humans.
The man almost seemed to flinch at the mention, but it was just him being still for a moment too long. He looked down at Tomura with a wry, faux-relaxed smile, "Now, Young Shimura, why would you think that?"
Tomura took a deep breath in and out; watching the pavement pass beneath his feet as they walked, "You... You said your name was different, some other time."
The tall man's smile turned strained, "Did I? You'll have to tell me what it was..."
Tomura's heart was decidedly beating much faster than it should, now. He realized he'd messed up badly, "Um... I dunno it was like..." Tomura looked up at the man, only to see his red eyes piercing through him. Scared, Tomura's voice choked up, "U-Uh...?"
Tomura gulped, trying to look at anything else around him, "M-Mister, you're scaring me- I really don't know."
The man looked up and away, "Hm... You're an interesting one, Shimura."
Tomura let out a quiet sigh of relief, thinking the danger had passed... It didn't.
The man stopped them dead in their tracks, and said, "You are a very interesting one." He knelt down to Tomura, making direct eye contact. "Tell me, boy... you haven't gone to the doctor for your quirk yet, have you?"
Tomura took a step back, startled, "I-I dunno-"
"Good." The man regained a grin, "Because... May I tell you a secret?"
Admittedly, even scared half to death, Tomura nodded.
"They were going to tell you you weren't getting one anyway, Tenko... You're quirkless!" The man held up one of Tenko's hands, offering, "Unless... You'd want one of mine? I can give one to you with my quirk... All For One."
Tomura's stance was held frigidly still, as All For One stared at him with glinting eyes from under his fedora. This close of an encounter caused a wave of memories lost in dissociative fugues to come rushing back. This was exactly how it'd happened last time, why couldn't he remember? Suddenly he was back in the past as Tenko again, as the same All For One made him a deal for his new quirk... He mumbled, "All For One..."
The accidental absence of a questioning tone had All For One gaining suspicion, before he looked at All For One's hand, and quickly pulling his own away. "I- How do you know that, though? You're not a doctor... I could have a quirk! What kinda quirk would you give me, anyways?"
Besides his hate for the Decay quirk and what it did to him, Tomura couldn't stop staring at All For One's hand, thinking about it. Despite how dangerous it was, it was also... familiar. Maybe he could do it right this time...
All For One answered, waving his fingers to show off tiny lightshows dancing around his hand, "I'd give you... Something incredibly powerful. It would be so easy to become a hero with it, your father wouldn't even blink before getting you enrolled at UA."
"Really...?" Tomura's curiosity posessed him yet again, but he was still skeptical. His memories blurred just near the end of their encounter, as if...
"So, Tenko, do we have a deal?"
Dealing with the devil, of course. Even as Tomura knew what would come out of this, he knew how Decay worked, he could control it this time. At least, he hoped he could.
---
The next thing he knew, he was standing at the door of his house, looking up as Mr. Goemon walked away, and his mom ushered him back inside. "Tenko... Your father better not have heard that..."
She sighed, "Well, it's almost time for your medication cream anyway. Can you go find your toys and meet me in the living room?"
Feeling somewhat dizzy, Tomura nodded. He guessed he was just tired, not sure exactly why, though... His hands were kind of tingly, but that's probably from getting them all scraped up playing, right? Yeah...
But, when all things went quiet for just a moment, was when Tomura heard a terrifyingly familiar heavy footstep behind him. He felt like he was weightless again, but this time it was served alongside terror as he found himself being dragged across the house by his father.
"Playing hero again? What did I tell you, Tenko?!"
As Tomura flailed to reach the ground again and regain control of the situation he once again felt so utterly helpless in, Nao returned to the hall. Appalled, she cried out, "Kotaro! Stop being so hard on him!"
Tomura gave in to his instinct to cry, reaching out for his mother, but this time his sobs and whines were quieter... Almost sounding strangled. He couldn't tell you why or how, but he knew the last time, he had made much more noise.
Kotaro said, as they approached the sliding back door to their house, "Maybe you've finally learned your lesson this time."
Exiting to the backyard and leaving Nao behind, Tomura's flailing caused him to stub his toe on one of the steps. He whimpered, ironically getting quieter as he curled into himself from the pain. He was so used to reacting in anger and internalizing, now it was finally rubbing off on his new self.
Kotaro set him down on their patio across the yard, to which Tomura quickly scrambled back to the fence. Looking up at his father while he cradled his foot, he grit his teeth as tears cascaded down his face against his will. He cursed for his father's coming death, but couldn't muster up the courage to say it to his face.
Kotaro stated coldly, "You'll stay out here until I say you can come back inside, got it?"
Tomura furrowed his brows and looked to the side with a pained pout. That turned out not to be the right answer.
"Tenko!" Kotaro yelled.
Tomura immediately snapped back to attention, prematurely wincing back from the hit he was sure he was going to get. But he couldn't even be right about that, could he?
"You will not undermine my authority in this house, boy." Kotaro commanded, "Say yes."
"Y-Yes, Father." Tomura muttered.
The silence was so loud in those following seconds.
"Good." Without another word, Kotaro turned around and went back inside.
Tomura breathed heavily, as the tears continued to run down his cheeks, irritating his scratches and stinging his eyes and nose in the sharp, cold air of dusk. He did not need a reminder of why he never wanted to return here. Why this day?
Only reflecting back, did Tomura actually remember the same day playing out in his previous life. Playing hero with Mikkun and Tomo-chan... All For One... Being kicked out of the house before dinner. His attention turned back to the house, the thought of his father briefly causing another wave of crying before he stabilized himself.
From across the yard, Tomura couldn't tell much of what was going on. There was the typical, Mom arguing with Father. His grandparents were also talking. He couldn't see his sister or Mon-chan.
He decided to look back up at the sky, try to pass the time by distracting himself with the many things outdoors. The clouds were scattered perfectly across the sky, the golden edges just starting to glow as the sun started approaching the horizon, though their suburban sprawl didn't allow Tomura to see it. The sight relaxed him, but only slightly. Maybe if he just kept staring, time would go faster.
And it did, but not in the way he expected. Left alone with his thoughts, some garden tools, and nothing more, his mind started to drift. The clouds became representations of his friends, family, memories; coloring the sky with several different scenes, all playing simultaneously. From one corner, he could see Kurogiri being introduced to him. From another, Toga was making silly faces behind Dabi while he talked. Looking through Mikkun's All Might collection, playing League Of Legends with Spinner, picking flowers with Hana while Mon-chan chased his own tail, Having a three-sided argument with Twice.
He didn't really realize how much his friends meant to him until they were...
Suddenly, his mother seemingly appearing out of nowhere in front of him startled him.
"Tenko!" She held a hand up to his cheek, gently wiping off a tear he couldn't feel before, "Sweetie, your father's been calling you for 5 minutes. Come on, lets get you some dinner."
The sky was dark.
---
The next day went roughly similarly to the former, though Tomura tried to stay away from playing heroes again... It's not like he'd become one anyway. Mikkun wasn't there that day, something about getting sick, so only Tomo-chan was there to talk.
"Your dad wasn't mean again, was he, Ten?" She pouted.
Tomura didn't return a response.
"Tenko, please, you gotta talk to me! You're acting really weirdly..."
With some frustration, Tomura raised his voice, "I just don't wanna talk about it...!"
Tomo-chan stood in stunned silence for a few moments, before hardening her disposition, "Well, now you really gotta tell me what's wrong. I've never heard you snap at someone like that!"
Tomura was surprised. He'd pretty much always thought of himself as some bratty, rude kid, because he'd always been told he was. "What do you mean...?"
"Ten, you're like the most kindhearted kid I've ever met! Just like I keep saying, 'you're just like All Might!'" Tomo-chan made the according pose, trying to strengthen her point. "Don't you get it? I haven't even seen you get mad at Ms. Sayaka when she's so strict on us."
Tomura ruminated on that, quietly.
He sighed before turning his head away, finally talking about it, "... Tomo-chan, I don't think I can be a hero..."
Tomo-chan's eyebrows furrowed, "Why not?"
"There's a lotta reasons."
"Just tell me, Ten." Tomo-chan urged, her tone quieter.
Tomura looked at her again, a steady, focused expression on her face. He searched for just about any reason not to tell her about what was going on, and... He found none. She had some of the most crucial parts of his friends in his past life: Toga's brashness, Dabi's pickiness, Kurogiri's calmness when things went wrong... and that was enough to give in, for Tomura.
"Tomo-chan... I..." This was difficult, "I think I'm gonna turn out to be a villain, a really bad one. But it's not all gonna be my fault.
I think when I get it, my quirk is going to hurt people when I get it, and that's gonna scare me into hurting more and more people, and then its gonna break things, and break and break and break them until theres nothing in the world anymore but dust...
And I think that man that took me home yesterday, Mr. Goemon, has something to do with it..."
"Ten...?"
Tomura gulped, nervous, "Y-Yeah?"
Tomo-chan exhaled quietly, a hint of disbelief glinting in her eyes, "This all sounds kinda crazy, Ten... I don't think you could harm a fly. But I can try and help."
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