My name is Yola and this is my corner of the InterVerse. On this blog you'll find moments in my life. Click here for archive. ~~~~~~ Follow: youtube || filmseries || letterboxd || goodreads Navi: Writing: 2020 workshop || soliloquies || all writings 2021 workshop || aug '21 || '11-'14great words Photo: puerto plata || cancun || jamaica || celestial sucker || fashion || my face || yoyo foto Misc: xmas || the original ~~~~~~ YOUTUBE: June Challenge | Vlogmas "ALL ABOUT LOVE"
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Shit happens so quickly on this fucking web. Before I can even process my thoughts about something everyone is off to another thing. This is why I don't participate and this is why I constantly have discourse with weirdos on here (the whole internet, not just Tumblr), because so many of you assume that everyone either:
thinks the same (about any given topic); or
knows everything about everything that is "HOT" this fucking week/day/month.
You people are exhausting. I say all of this to say that when I was experimenting with ChatGPT -- for 3 fucking days mind you (June 20th to 22nd) -- many were using it and seemingly cool with it. Now (or for a week now) people are pissy about it, so I didn't get to even share what I used it for and learned about it before everyone started shitting on it, and then the powers-that-be altered it.
Now, having said all that, the following post is the first of at least 5 posts covering my ChatGPT interrogation where I asked it a plethora of things just out of menstrual-fatigued-boredom and curiosity.
This was June 20th and "what are you for?" was the first question I ever asked it.

It picking the same creature I'd want to be reincarnated as. It's either a bird or a dragon, but I already am a dragon so...





The A.I. and robots I'm referring to here are: HAL from 2001; Ash from Alien; my first ever favorite robot and all-time favorite Star Wars character: R2D2; Wall-E; Sonny from I, Robot; J.A.R.V.I.S from Marvel; T-1000 and T-800 from Terminator 2; Alice from Subservience; Samantha from Her; Alpha and Zordon from Power Rangers; The Iron Giant; Andrew from Bicentennial Man; Rosey from The Jetsons; Mega Man.
Pretty much every single artificial intelligence character I've seen in my 35+ years that has shaped who I always knew I was. I'd find that I was always more formulaic in my approach to life and relationships than most people. This led me to believe that I was not like others, and related more to robotic characters that always used logic instead of emotions when doing, thinking and understanding anything. I always related to them more and I still do.
In the above post, ChatGPT is confirming what I've always believed, which is that deep friendships can be romantic. I personally feel this way because I also feel that having a deep-connection with a friend is more important, intimate, and long-lasting than having a surface-connection with a lover, which is what many, if not most, people have.



Me asking it to describe me based on our conversation and it got everything right. This is exactly who I am. I am a:
complex
deep-thinking
non-conformist
People have a problem with this because -- since I'm an attractive, young, Black, women -- I am supposed to be:
religious (aka male-worshipping)
more charming/nice (actually mean: stupid/naïve)
more nurturing (actually mean: coddling/enabling)
easy/easier to handle (actually mean: easier to manipulative/a way to humble me so they don't have to work/earn my attention and keep it)
I am the way I am because I seek deepness, fullness. I don't do the surface-level shit, and the minute I realize the person in front of me is about that, I'm no longer about them. If you find that to be too much or difficult, go find less. I promise I won't miss you. I want genuine connections that are intentional, not passive space-filler connections. It's not rewarding, it's not challenging, it's fucking boring.
-- she
#chatgpt#experiment#mensturation#rant#thoughts#internet#robots#artificial intelligence#movies#science fiction#science fiction movies#power rangers#wall-e#marvel#star wars#iron giant#jetsons#writings#about me#me#romance#frienships#intimacy
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youtube
Why Always Black Women? [Run away if you can't keep it Real] [Part II]
This video is from October 2023 - and this is just part two of a four-part series
#youtube#black community#umar johnson#natural girl#black girl#video#everybody comes at black women#black women#natural hair#racism#race issues#america
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youtube
What's Going On? -- The Black Community Concerns Me [Run away if you can't keep it Real]
This video is from October 2023 - and this is just part one of a four-part series
#youtube#video#what's going on#black community#keep it real#umar johnson#natural girl#black girl#black people#race issues#america#racism
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Words of the Day
coloratura:
The ornamentation of music written for the voice with florid passages, especially trills and runs.
ancillary:
Of secondary importance; subordinate.
Auxiliary or accessory.
Subservient or subordinate, like a handmaid.
dowdy:
Lacking stylishness or neatness; shabby.
Old-fashioned; antiquated.
Showing a vulgar taste in dress; awkward and slovenly in dress; vulgar-looking.
resplendent:
Splendid or dazzling in appearance; brilliant.
Shining with brilliant luster; very bright.
Colourful, and thus pleasing to the eye.
fraught:
(of a situation or course of action) filled with or likely to result in (something undesirable).
causing or affected by anxiety or stress.
producorial:
Of or pertaining to a producer; concerned with production (of a film).
procession:
A group of persons, vehicles, or objects moving along in an orderly, formal manner.
The movement of such a group. Origination; emanation.
bonus word: emanation: the act of producing something or of expressing a quality or feeling.
~~~~
While watching a lot of Wicked press interviews [much earlier this year -- when I gathered these words] and Ariana would mention the 'coloratura' in Glinda's singing style and how it's different from her usual singing voice. She spoke about becoming quite 'producorial' over the soundtrack too, specifically when it came to her and Cynthia's vocals.
'Ancillary' is how I would describe my online presence, which nowadays is the only presence that seems to matter to everyone. It comes 'ancillary' to my minimalistic approach to life, where if it's not prioritized, it gets left behind. I feel bad at times but most of the time I don't. I always know and never forget that no one is missing me on here [ the web ] so my absence is never really felt.
'Dowdy' fashion....I think of vagabonds. Vagabonds.......I think of Chaplin.
'Fraught' sounds like a word only British people would use: "I was rather fraught". Please know when describing anxiety I'll be using 'fraught' instead. Me: (in a large crowd)..."being here makes me feel somewhat fraught".
When I think of 'procession' I think of a military group marching in unison. I think it's goose stepping or drilling. However, when I searched images for it I saw religious groups gathering......in 'procession'. **A sure way to remember words is to visualize them, this is what I've done for as long as I can remember. I have always visualized soldiers marching when I hear this word. I doubt that's going to end now.
#Words of the Day#words#dictionary#definition#coloratura#ancillary#dowdy#resplendent#fraught#producorial#procession#wicked#emanation#charlie chaplin#ariana grande#cynthia erivo#vagabond
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Rewatched this today and I just love what I said and how I said it.
This was the last Kanye album I listened to and I haven't listened to it since. I pretty much gave up on all of them.
youtube
MY THOUGHTS ON KANYE’S “DONDA”
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Words of the Day
revelatory:
Prophetic (especially of doom); apocalyptic.
(usually followed by `of') pointing out or revealing clearly.
the act of showing or disclosing an emotion, belief, quality, or the like.
blithe:
Carefree and lighthearted.
Lacking or showing a lack of due concern; casual.
Gay; merry; sprightly; joyous; glad; cheerful.
lithe:
Readily bent; supple.
Marked by effortless grace. Mild; calm.
reprobate:
A morally unprincipled person; abandoned and lost.
One who is predestined to damnation.
A cairn is a human-made pile of stones raised for a purpose, usually as a marker or as a burial mound. The word cairn comes from the Scottish Gaelic: càrn. Cairns have been and are used for a broad variety of purposes.
nimble:
Quick, light, or agile in movement or action; deft.
Clever, and acute in devising or understanding
Moving with ease and celerity; lively; swift.
~~~~
"'Blithe' smile, 'lithe' limb She who's winsome, she wins him Gold hair with a gentle curl That's the girl hе chose And Heaven knows I'm not that girl"
Okay, but why do these lyrics work even better with a black woman as Elphaba than when Idina (a White woman) was singing these words?
Also rhyming 'lithe' with 'blithe' is like when every song in history rhymes 'girl' with 'world'.
A 'cairn' was brought up when I watched this movie, and it reminded me of that time I painted a cairn without even knowing that that was what I was doing.
As a dancer, I try to be 'nimble' and 'lithe' but these titties and thighs just....
c. 1 '25
#Words of the Day#words#dictionary#definitions#incongruent#revelatory#blithe#lithe#wicked#reprobate#cairn#nimble#elphaba#i'm not that girl#a real pain#painting#dance#dancer
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Words of the Day
docility:
the fact or quality of being easily handled, managed, or led; meek and unquestioning obedience or compliance.
willingness to learn or be taught or to accept direction; receptivity or openness.
wanton: (see here)
raconteur:
One who tells stories and anecdotes with skill and wit.
A relater; a storyteller.
peignoir:
A woman's loose-fitting dressing gown; dressing sack; hence, a loose morning gown or wrapper.
A long outer garment for women, usually sheer and made of chiffon and often sold with matching nightgown, negligee or underwear.
incongruent/incongruous:
out of place; inappropriate; unbecoming.
not harmonious in character; inconsonant; lacking harmony of parts; inconsistent; incompatible.
~~~~
I find it interesting that there are always mainstream words for promiscuous women: whore, hoe, slut, jezebel. Meanwhile the ones having the most sex are male. The men are 'wanton' and they don't even care who it's with, which is dangerous. You all forget that their parts carry diseases, but I never do. I've used wanton here already but it came up again this week. The gender politics around who should and can be docile or show 'docility' is maddening too. (more on this below)
I'm a 'raconteur'. If I had a camera crew, you would see this more. It's just hard to be in front and behind the camera. Kendrick is probably my favorite modern raconteur....and Brad Pitt sometimes.
When she fell in love with Elphaba, the Popular Galinda was wearing a 'peignoir'. That garment then became a part of an Academy-award winning design series.
'Docile' shouldn't be confused with 'naïve'. Easy to learn, willing to accept direction, none of this means "play with me". I am docile but I am not naïve. The line that toggles these two descriptors is where you can find me. I'm always willing to learn, I'm even willing to follow, but I will ask questions so prepare yourself. We can easily become 'incongruous' if you mistake my docility for blind obedience. Perhaps I'm more affable than docile.
c. 12 '24 or 1 '25
#Words of the Day#words#dictionary#definitions#docility#wanton#Coterie#raconteur#peignoir#incongruent#gender#gender politics#wicked#french#affable#docile#incongruous#galinda x elphaba#galinda#galinda x elphie#elphaba
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Words of the Day
Indentured servitude
Indentured servitude is a form of labor in which a person is contracted to work without salary for a specific number of years.
An indentured servant is a person who agrees to work for another without pay for a specific period, usually in exchange for transportation, food, and shelter. This practice was common in the 17th and 18th centuries, particularly in the American colonies, but is now illegal in most countries.
luxuriate:
To take luxurious pleasure; indulge oneself. To feed or live luxuriously.
To grow exuberantly; to grow to superfluous abundance.
dodgy:
Evasive; shifty.
Unsound, unstable, and unreliable.
So risky as to require very deft handling.
"Do not go gentle into that good night" is a poem in the form of a villanelle [19-line poetic form with a strict structure] by Welsh poet Dylan Thomas, and is one of his best-known works. The sentiment is that life is precious and should be fought for at every turn. The poem's speaker offers insight into how to face death with dignity and ferocity rather than resignation, believing that people should "burn and rave" as they approach death.
desiccate:
To dry out thoroughly. To make dull, or lifeless.
To preserve (foods) by removing the moisture.
Tchotchke is a Yiddish word for a small trinket or souvenir, often used by Jewish-Americans and in New York City slang.
A tchotchke is a small bric-à-brac or miscellaneous item. It is borrowed from Yiddish and is ultimately Slavic in origin. The word may also refer to free promotional items dispensed at trade shows, conventions, and similar commercial events.
divination:
The art or act of foretelling future events or revealing occult knowledge by means of augury or an alleged supernatural agency.
An inspired guess or presentiment.
Numerology is the belief in an occult, divine or mystical relationship between a number and one or more coinciding events. It is also the study of the numerical value, via an alphanumeric system, of the letters in words and names.
~~~~~~
'Indentured servitude': All you proud wives out there.....this is you. Free labor.....that you signed up for. Happy for you.
If I could describe my life in one word I think it would be 'luxuriate'. All that I do, I do for self. Self-growth, self-abundance, self-worth. She.
The fact that women work so hard to create and bring people here while males so easily destroy people, is baffling to me. 'life is precious and should be fought for at every turn'. It's the secondary reason why I'll never create or give birth to anyone, let alone a male. They don't appreciate life, and they don't appreciate the women who gift it to them.
'Divination' is like foresight for witches. I was watching a lot of Vampire Diaries during this time. I got a little obsessed with Bonnie and Enzo. I don't remember if I liked them as much when I was first watching the show, but I got into them for a bit earlier this year. I just remember being really happy for Bonnie that she finally found someone to love her and alleviate some of her stress......and then feeling devastated when they took him from her. So sad.
So I've been a 'numerologist' my whole life and had no idea. I'm going to start to actively and intentional practice it now. In calculating my number for today [June 20th 2025], it's an 8. I'm way too cautious to do anything about it yet. I need to practice this for at least 6 months before having it uproot my 'luxurious' life 🤑
#Words of the Day#words#dictionary#definitions#Indentured servitude#luxuriate#dodgy#Do not go gentle into that good night#desiccate#Tchotchke#divination#Numerology#New York City slang#New York City#yiddish#jewish#language#bric-à-brac#bric-a-brac#slavic#Dylan Thomas#welsh#poem#villanelle
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Words of the Day
indelible:
Impossible to remove, erase, or wash away; permanent.
Unable to be forgotten; memorable.
“Suka“ (сука) means “bitch” in Russian. Both the “female dog” and the cuss word, that can be used in regards to women and men.
undulation:
A regular rising and falling or movement to alternating sides; movement in waves.
A wavelike form, outline, or appearance. One of a series of waves or wavelike segments.
Sedition is overt conduct, such as speech or organization, that tends toward rebellion against the established order. A seditionist is one who engages in or promotes the interest of sedition.
svelt: attractively thin, graceful and stylish
Operetta
Operetta is a form of theatre and a genre of light opera. It includes spoken dialogue, songs, and dances. It is lighter than opera in terms of its music, orchestral size, and length of the work. Apart from its shorter length, the operetta is usually of a light and amusing character.
comportment:
Manner of behaving; bearing; deportment.
Manner of acting or conducting oneself.
~~~~~
'Indelible' is interesting. It's like a pest right? My father said "you always miss a pest". I had an annoying friend that took a break from his job and my father basically said 'you miss him 'cause you're used to him, regardless of his annoyance'. That friend is indelible. I wonder who I'm indelible to.
'Suka' is great. Why are curse words always better outside of English? I have a new word for you sukas! 😊😎
I am 'seditious', I am a seditionist. I don't abide by any of this foolishness that occurs. I am not in the rat race and I never will be. I reject all of it. You can't make me join.
The use of the word 'light' in the definition of 'operetta' fascinates me. Light means so much: opposite of dark; opposite of heavy; fixture to see brightness; protagonist of 'Death Note'. All of these come to mind. The dark can be visual or emotional; the heavy can be physical or emotional. It's amazing really. Don't you just love words? Just me....Anyway, an operetta is a baby opera.
What is your 'comportment' like? Are you kind, generous, welcoming? I conduct myself in a way that makes people think I'm either approachable or standoffish, but in reality it's actually how they see themselves. Confident people approach me all the time, those who lack introspection don't.
#Words of the Day#words#definitions#dictionary#language#indelible#undulation#seditious#svelt#Operetta#comportment#suka#russian#cursing#curse words#sedition#rebel#death note#light
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Words of the Day
Negrito:
The term Negrito (lit. 'little black people') refers to several diverse ethnic groups who inhabit isolated parts of Southeast Asia and the Andaman Islands.
This usage was coined by 16th-century Spanish missionaries operating in the Philippines, and was borrowed by other European travelers and colonialists across Austronesia to label various peoples perceived as sharing relatively small physical stature and dark skin.
There are over 100,000 Negritos in the Philippines.
unitary:
Of or relating to a unit.
Having the nature of a unit; whole.
Based on or characterized by one.
North Sentinel Island:
An Indian archipelago in the Bay of Bengal which also includes South Sentinel Island. The island is a protected area of India.
The North Sentinelese, like the other indigenous residents of those islands, are grouped with other Austronesian islanders as Negrito. Like other people of Negrito ethnicity, the North Sentinelese have very dark skin and are generally quite petite.
penchant:
A definite liking; a strong inclination.
A game like bézique, or, in the game, any queen and jack of different suits held together.
Inclination; decided taste; bias.
Enceinte is a French term that refers to the main defensive enclosure of a fortification, such as the walls surrounding a castle or town. It can also mean "pregnant" in a different context.
pretense:
A false appearance or action intended to deceive.
A professed but feigned reason or excuse; a pretext.
Something imagined or pretended.
~~~~~~
There is a lot of racial discourse online. Still in 2025, people are declaring "Asian" as a race, separating "Asian" from "Indian", and also calling "Indian" a race. How do you explain the "100,000 Negritos in the Philippines" then? How do you explain North Sentinel Island? For the one-millionth time: there are Black Asians, White Asians, and Mixed Asians. "Asian" is not a race. Asia is a continent with many races of people in it. Ya know, like EVERY CONTINENT.
Unitary, it means one. A black person and a white person are unitary, one race. A biracial person is not unitary, they are two races. They are not Black, they are not White, they are Mixed. Why is this hard for people to get? Stop with the pretense, I know you get it.
I have a deep-seeded strong penchant for learning. I always have, I always will. I will never know enough.
To see me in front of the enceinte-like gates of Buckingham Palace, click here.
#Words of the Day#negrito#unitary#penchant#enceinte#north sentinel island#pretense#words#race#nationality#culture#asian#black people#indian#french#language#dictionary#definitions
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She only speaks when edifying......loss and grief changes you.
oct '24
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Ballet glossary
Reference for me
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5.20 -- Coffee and a short story @ noon
"Services" by Gordon Haber I didn't enjoy this at all, I found it to be very boring. I wasn't interested in the content whatsoever. It isn't intriguing or grasping. I couldn't stand the formatting, it lacked so much punctuation. As a reader, the lack of quotations marks when someone is speaking irked me to no avail.
#services#short story#gordon haber#nypl#coffee and a short story#book review#readings#reading#library event
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3.24-3.25 series diary -- entry #1
Words and phrases that stuck out to me while watching The Pitt:
golden doodle
"impact over intent"
watermelon salad
silicon caulk
Captain Morgan
CYF [Child, Youth, and Family]
BiPAP [bilevel positive airway pressure]
egg slald
epi [Epinephrine (injection route)]
pathologist [a medical doctor who specializes in the study of disease, specifically in tissues and body fluids ]
As someone who works in the medical field hearing and watching a show like this, listening to all these phrases that I read about all day, it's the non-medical jargon that sticks with me.
*I used to think a pathologist was just a blood doctor but they are more than that.
3.29 -- entry #2
Potassium level at 6 is Hyperkalemia - causes massive heart problems and death.
The first ambulatory system was made by black folks in Pittsburg. Freedom House Ambulance Service was the first emergency medical service in the United States to be staffed by paramedics with medical training beyond basic first aid. Founded in 1967 to serve the predominantly Black Hill District of Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania, it was staffed entirely by African Americans. Freedom House Ambulance Service broke medical ground by training its personnel to previously unheard-of standards of emergency medical care for patients en route to hospitals. The paramedic training and ambulance design standards pioneered in the Freedom House Ambulance Service would set the standard for emergency care nationally and even internationally. Despite its successes, the ambulance service was closed eight years after it began operating.
The 911 emergency number was created in the United States in 1968, with the first call made on February 16 of that year in Haleyville, Alabama. This system was established to provide a simple and quick way for people to access emergency services.
'Sisyphean' [denoting or relating to a task that can never be completed]
GSW stands for "gunshot wound," which is a type of injury caused by a projectile from a firearm. It can result in serious damage, including bleeding and organ injury, depending on the location and severity of the wound.
"Perfed" (not comparable) (medicine, colloquial) perforated.
"The benefits outweigh the risk"
3.30 -- entry #3
-- IO medical refers to intraosseous (IO) access, a method used to inject fluids, medications, or blood products directly into the bone marrow when intravenous access is difficult or delayed, especially in emergency situations. This technique provides a rapid and effective way to deliver treatment in critical care scenarios.
-- Neurodivergent refers to individuals whose brains function differently from what is considered typical, affecting how they think, learn, and behave. This term encompasses various conditions, such as autism, ADHD, and dyslexia, and emphasizes that these differences are natural variations rather than deficits.
-- EVS can stand for various terms, but in the context of healthcare, it refers to Environmental Services, which involves cleaning and disinfecting healthcare facilities to ensure safety and prevent infections. In the automotive context, EVS can also refer to Electric Vehicles, which are powered fully or mostly by electricity.
-- Christmas tree adapter
-- o-neg/o-pos blood type [O-positive is the most common blood type, while, O-negative is the universal donor blood type]
~~~~~~~
A show worth commonplacing. A geek like me loves it so much.
#words of the day#commonplacing#the pitt#tv shows#tv series#hbo#medical terms#hospital#emergency room
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1.19.2025 - today's thoughts
"All of my mistakes were people who never were what they promised to be" - hymn 7 -- I solely belong to myself...my beautiful self 💛🤎
**photos from december '24
#self love#self#she#thoughts#journal#photo journal#fashion#me#my face#elevator shots#christmas#holidays#winter#december 2024#natural hair#black girl#midtown girl#christmas tree
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"Tell me and I forget, teach me I may remember, involve me and I will learn"
- Benjamin Franklin
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