simeon-yeterian - Tumblr blog

[simeon-yeterian]

My stepdad bought like 300 domestic rodents of various species to live in our house and I was worried about accidentally crushing them while petting them.

[simeon-yeterian]

When I was a kid, my resting face was a smile. Then one day, my family and I went to this abandoned gothic mansion, with a somehow clean and clear pool in its garden. We went swimming and I threw a beach ball I had into the sun. When it came crashing down, it landed on my face and permanently wiped the smile off my face, giving me resting bitch face.

[simeon-yeterian]

-Chris McLean

I got to host a Survivor-style reality tv show and ended up getting mocked for having writer's block and not being able to come up with the challenge for one episode.

[simeon-yeterian]

I want to take a dollar bill and write “are you Misha Collins” on it and maybe one day it’ll end up in his hands and he’d be the one mind fucked for once

[simeon-yeterian]

When are you guys accepting picture asks? I got cursed stuff to send you.

Keep your eyes peeled for an announcement coming this week

[simeon-yeterian]

Real quote by me i swear.

[simeon-yeterian]

I GOT A THEME SONG, how do you like me now, mr EmPloyEe oF tHe moNTh? You don’t have a theme song, do you? No? Didn’t think so, but your dog did. The dog is even more important than you, so suck it.

[simeon-yeterian]

Mod for GTA V that changes nothing aside from playing “Life will Change” from persona 5 during the heists.

[simeon-yeterian]

This ad replicated the fucking intro cutscene to the mission where you pull martin madrazo’s lovers house off the cliff because… why?! Why is gta v the game you want to replicate for your match 3 ad?

[simeon-yeterian]

How would you feel if i told you that you are “No” in a youtuber ranking Dark Viper? Fuck you.

[simeon-yeterian]

Having thought about it, maybe firing the guy who can use magic to drive cars faster and more safely was not a good idea.

[simeon-yeterian]

Absolutely Yes. Arf Arf indeed buddy.

Translation:

[simeon-yeterian]

Why did i even follow you? The only times you’ve been in my cognition are on tumblr and in that episode of the Simpsons where they treat writing a book as a heist.

Possibly you're hoping that I'll let slip a few crumbs of information about how to heist your way onto the bestseller lists.

[simeon-yeterian]

The only timelines where yukichie isnt real are the ones where i romanced one of them first

I’m sorry I absolutely lost it when I read your name and had to make this

Pov you romanced Yukiko and not Chie

[simeon-yeterian]

He was nice to hang out with, untill he betrayed me.

Are you familiar with the traitor. The “Employee of the month.” What’s your opinion on him compared to the bastard who fucked up my face and the guy who bought the stripclub nearby (he’s a cool dude, but those other two…)

Oh, Franklin? I think he’s pretty cool, honestly wouldn’t mind to hang out with him, he just seems chill, and honestly he’s rlly underrated which is a shame because i like him. Hope that’s a good answer.

[simeon-yeterian]

I have never committed grand theft auto, but that’s not gonna stop my employees from doing so.

[simeon-yeterian]

Sometimes i wonder wether it’s even worth keeping the business running, but then i see the dumb idiot gta online players bringing me veichles worth more than the game they are playing and it makes me happy, knowing they are being scammed.