sleepdeprivedpanda - Tumblr blog

[sleepdeprivedpanda]

girls go to college to get more knowledge. men go to svalbard to die in the polar night.

[sleepdeprivedpanda]

source

[sleepdeprivedpanda]

(grabs you by the shoulders) you have to make room for new experiences in your life. you have to go through the unpleasant work of leaving your comfort zone, even if just for a few minutes at a time. because if you don't, your brain will trick you into stagnation. you will start to believe that the world can barely fit you in it. but that's not true. it's the opposite way around. you can fit the whole word inside of you. your task is only this: to welcome it with open arms

[sleepdeprivedpanda]

When the chronic fatigue is chronic

[sleepdeprivedpanda]

The person I reblogged this from deserves to be happy

I tried to scroll past this. I really did

[sleepdeprivedpanda]

proud to say that I have never once in my life figured out the whodunit in any crime story I've read or watched. I just let the facts and clues wash over me, absorbing absolutely none of it. I am the audience they think of when they throw in red herrings, in case you've ever wondered "who would fall for this obvious false lead". it's me. I am the idiot viewer/reader. not once has an obviously framed clue revealed anything to me. my head is completely empty when I consume these stories.

[sleepdeprivedpanda]

[sleepdeprivedpanda]

"She's so beautiful! I bet she goes to the library."

- my 7 year old daughter

[sleepdeprivedpanda]

I stared at the Devil. "Sorry, what?"

"I want to commission an original sin. Not The Original Sin," the Devil chuckled. "Something new."

"Why me?"

"I have read your fiction. You're very creative."

"But..."

"You don't need to commit it, just write it."

"Oh! What's the pay?"

[sleepdeprivedpanda]

Finding out that World Athletics pays $100k every time a new world record is set so so Mondo Duplantis has just been setting it 1cm at a time from 6.17m to 6.25m in the past 4 years is so funny??? Finessing 1 million dollars 1 cm at a time even though he can clearly go higher at one shot???? #respect

[sleepdeprivedpanda]

tumblr are you telling me something

[sleepdeprivedpanda]

ever since i was a young hydrogen particle 14 billion years ago i knew i wanted to be wasting all the hot water in the shower

[sleepdeprivedpanda]

Dandelions have a symbiotic relationship with little kids who make wishes

[sleepdeprivedpanda]

the most disorienting thing thats ever happened to me was when a linguistics major stopped in the middle of our conversation, looked me in the eye, and said, "you have a very interesting vernacular. were you on tumblr in 2014?" and i had to just stand there and process that one for a good ten seconds

[sleepdeprivedpanda]

I understand why a lot of fantasy settings with Ambiguously Catholic organised religions go the old "the Church officially forbids magic while practising it in secret in order to monopolise its power" route, but it's almost a shame because the reality of the situation was much funnier.

Like, yes, a lot of Catholic clergy during the Middle Ages did practice magic in secret, but they weren't keeping it secret as some sort of sinister top-down conspiracy to deny magic to the Common People: they were mostly keeping it secret from their own superiors. It wasn't one of those "well, it's okay when we do it" deals: the Church very much did not want its local priests doing wizard shit. We have official records of local priests being disciplined for getting caught doing wizard shit. And the preponderance of evidence is that most of them would take their lumps, promise to stop doing wizard shit, then go right back to doing wizard shit.

It turns out that if you give a bunch of dudes education, literacy, and a lot of time on their hands, some non-zero percentage of them are going to decide to be wizards, no matter how hard you try to stop them from being wizards.

[sleepdeprivedpanda]

when I see something dated 2019 I think “oh that’s not too long ago” and then I remember that 2019 was not only five years ago but those five years have somehow contained several lifetimes

[sleepdeprivedpanda]

what’s the opposite of a poor little meow meow. this man is pathetic but he’s unfathomably cocky and i want to make him cry