solarsong-writes

[solarsong-writes]

its her "i want a kiss" face

[solarsong-writes]

I'm happy to hear that it was inspiring! <3 I think it's easy for all of us to forget that we only really see the end product of people's efforts -- whether it be art, writing, or another endeavor. We don't get to see the many hours that people have put into it unless they tell or show us, so I'm glad that my anecdote can give a little peek into that!

There have been so many things in my life that I thought I'd never be able to accomplish (public speaking being another huge one), and it really came down to deliberate practice and picking myself back up whenever I 'failed'. Because as long as you keep at it, you haven't truly failed. I've also seen people who are 65+ years old try to pick up new things, and that really hammered in the idea that the only person I ever need to compare myself to is myself. We're all on our own little journeys through life, and that's beautiful in its own way. :)

100k Word Commemoration! :))))))))))

For most of my life, my writing has been both subjectively and objectively terrible. This is an anecdote that I’ve been wanting to tell for a while now, ever since I started posting on AO3. It just never really felt like the ‘right time’ to post about it, but I figured commemorating 100k words posted on AO3 would be fun. This is by no means self-derogatory, but more so a reflection on my own writing journey that I hope may inspire other people to start writing. 

Warning: This is long.  

As I’ve mentioned, my writing was atrocious. Not that it was riddled with grammar or spelling mistakes – that was easy enough for me, since it’s following a set of rules. But, I couldn’t translate my ideas into words that flowed well or made much sense. I have a vivid memory from 6th grade, when we were put in groups to give peer feedback on the short stories we’ve written. We were supposed to pair up within the group to give one-on-one feedback and then rotate partners. But it immediately devolved into the entire group giving me feedback, and then the teacher joined in too because of the whole commotion! I remember sitting there, feeling mortified that my writing was just so bad that everyone wanted to try and help me. 

But perhaps you think, “Wait Solar! You could’ve just been bad at creative writing!!” 

Nope. This extended to all things writing. English historically was my worst subject, and nothing said this more than in high school when I had to write my very first AP (Advanced Placement) English essay. Since I was only a freshman at the time, the expectation for us was to score a four out of nine. Which is pretty low, and the grading rubric even defines a four as ‘inadequate’ and it means that an important idea was misread or missing and that the writing was ‘immature’.

Guess what I scored?

A one. 

Do you know how to score a one on an AP essay? You score a 0 only if you leave your paper entirely blank. You can repeat the prompt and add a single relevant sentence to score a one. I wrote an entire essay and scored a one. I was essentially tasked to reach inadequacy and failed. That’s where I was at with my writing for the longest time. 

But then how did I even get to where I am today? 

The short answer? Hard work.

The longer answer? Lots of hard work and constantly striving to be better.  

What kick-started this whole process was a good friend who was morbidly curious on how anyone could earn a one on the AP English essay and asked to see my writing. The best I could give her was the two I had written on the next essay as I couldn’t find where my one went – perhaps it’s for the best that it’s lost to time. She coached me on how to organize my writing and make sure that it’s clear. That every sentence served a relevant, overall purpose. That they logically flowed from one sentence to the next. These were things that didn’t require me to wax poetic at all. It just required me to arrange and rearrange my words and sentences in a way that was easy to understand. And by the middle of my sophomore year, I started writing 6s, which was on par where I was supposed to be. 

After my writing was at least understandable by others, I tried my hand at creative writing again. In my junior year of high school, I participated in NaNoWriMo (National Novel Writing Month), a challenge where you try to write 50k words in the month of November. I had always loved reading and I admired the people who wrote fanfic and posted it for the world to see, so I thought why not try it too? I made it to 24.5k words written, but the very act of going through the motions of writing, brainstorming, and writing more was eye-opening for how I should tackle future fics (aka figure out my plot beforehand lol). 

By my senior year, I was writing 8s and my writing assignments started being praised more than anything. It was also around this time when I started engaging in forum roleplay, where you conjure up a character, plop them in the specified setting, and interact with other people’s characters. Forum roleplaying requires you (unless you use a self-insert) to really think about a character’s past, their personality, their motives, and how these all combine to influence their behavior in the present. I learned how to characterize through it, and then challenged myself to roleplay characters that were very unlike me so that I can get into their headspaces. I looked at how other people would describe their environment and then started practicing how to write more descriptively. 

Even now, I’m still looking to improve. My dialogue tags have gotten better since I wrote To Walk Where the Light Shines. After being forced to worldbuild six completely different settings and convey it in a concise manner for Lives Etched on Our Palms, I think I’ve gotten better and more efficient at inserting that kind of detail. 

I think a lot of the time, especially when it comes to creative endeavors, it’s easy for other people to believe that the reason why we’re ‘good’ at it is because we are born talented. That there’s this intrinsic trait we have to make us good. But most of the time, that’s not true. It’s a matter of hard work and deliberate practice. I’m constantly looking to improve and I see differences in my writing from when I first started posting on AO3 compared to now. 

I also don’t believe that it’s ever ‘too late’ to improve or learn a skill. From my own experiences, life is a journey, and even if you move the needle a little bit today – that’s something and the only person you ever should compare yourself to is…yourself. Does it matter if other people are better? That’s saying you can’t ever be happy about your own accomplishments because someone out there has done all of these things but better. Which is absurd, in my opinion. Of course there’s someone out there better than me. That doesn’t matter because that never has or will diminish what I’ve accomplished for myself. I went from writing flaming dumpster fires to actually posting on AO3 and getting my research published. I did something I thought I’d never be able to do, and that holds meaning in it of itself – even if my fics didn’t take off like they have.  

Speaking of which, the reception to my fics has been especially heartwarming. Everyone has been kind and it always puts a smile on my face to read how my writing has been received. If not for the complete outpouring of support for To Walk Where the Light Shines – I’m honestly not sure how much Kanamafu I would’ve written afterwards (if you listen closely, you can hear my P5 WIPs gasping for air in the background). But genuinely, if you had asked 16-year-old me if I would ever write and post a fanfic, I would say “No. I don’t have the ability to. And that sounds way too scary.” If you told me that I would write a fairly popular fic for a ship I adore, I would say that you were delusional. 

What I’m trying to say with all of this is if you ever have looked at any of my writing and thought ‘that was good’ – you can do it too! I sincerely believe that you can. I’m not promising that it’ll be easy or quick, but I believe everyone can. So if writing has ever interested you, I encourage you to try it! Kanamafu Week is also coming up soon. ;)  

I hope this wasn’t too rambly or soapbox-y – if you’ve read this far, thank you! Happy 100k words to me, and I hope the next 100k words are even better! :)  

[solarsong-writes]

Here's a sneak peek of Chapter 2 of Finding Eternity, a Houseki no Kuni/Land of the Lustrous AU! It's been a while since I've written action scenes, but here we are. This chapter is about 50% finished, and I hope to complete it within the first week of July. :)

Sneak peek:

Mafuyu draws her bow back, aiming it at the growing sunspot, the black sharp edges slicing across the sky. “I’m in position, Shizuku.” 

The aquamarine tilts her head in acknowledgement, eyes also trained at the golden cloud crossing over. Mafuyu can see Shizuku’s hand tightens on her sword as they both tense for the moment the Lunarians land. 

The cloud stops a distance away, and Lunarians begin hopping off, dropping down onto the ground with lines trailing behind them.

“I’ll be off now, Mafuyu.” Shizuku darts forward, swiftly cutting down the closest Lunarian before it could react. Another Lunarian takes its place, swinging a sword that Shizuku bats aside with ease. 

An arrow sinks into a Lunarian trying to flank Shizuku, the golden figure dispersing into nothingness. Mafuyu rapidly shoots more Lunarians whenever they try to surround Shizuku or approach Mafuyu. Mafuyu is the last line of defense before they potentially catch less martially inclined gems unawares or worse, find their way into the sanctuary. 

There should be no risk of that though – Shizuku is making good progress, rapidly slicing her way through the Lunarians to make her way up to the large Lunarian still standing on the cloud. Mafuyu on the other hand, provides supportive fire and sees the overall enemy formation in the backline. 

It’s a strategy they’ve refined over decades of partnership, and its effectiveness is only proven when only a scattering of Lunarians remains. Shizuku takes one great leap to the cloud, and with one clean slice dispatches the central Lunarian. It only takes a few more seconds for Mafuyu to finish off the stragglers. 

“Good work,” Mafuyu says as Shizuku lands elegantly in front of her. 

“I couldn’t have done it without Mafuyu,” Shizuku says happily, pressing a hand to her cheek. 

[solarsong-writes]

kanamafu week 2025 day7

Dendritic opal / Bloodshot iolite

It's based on real varieties of opal and iolite!

[solarsong-writes]

kanamafu week 2025 day5

Love padlock

[solarsong-writes]

I barely made it in time, but the first chapter of Finding Eternity, my Kanamafu Week 2025 offering, is out! It's a Kanamafu Houseki no Kuni AU fic cause I wanted some more pizzazz in the DNA/Guilt prompt.

Chapter 2 will be...sometime later. Hopefully within Kanamafu Week, but I do need a bit to recover from writing 3k+ words in the last 24 hours.

Tags: Houseki no Kuni AU, Fluff, Angst, Bittersweet Ending, Existentialism, Ship of Theseus

Summary:

“There’s an old tale recorded about how in the long distant past, there were creatures called humans. But after five meteor strikes shattered the land, followed by a sixth one – they fled to the sea. And so they became split into Bones, Flesh, and Spirit,” Mafuyu explains.

“What happened to them afterwards?” Kanade asks.

“We, the gems, are the immortal bones."

Or

A Houseki no Kuni AU in which both Kanade and Mafuyu search for meaning in their infinite lifespan.

[solarsong-writes]

kanamafu week day 4

And then, the darkness engulfed her

obviously reference to one of my most favorite hello charlotte illustrations

[solarsong-writes]

As a fun hint for my Kanamafu Week 2025 offering: I know way too much about gemstones now. The first chapter will be up for Day 3: DNA/Guilt on the 23rd sometime if all goes according to plan!

(The fic still has no title, please send help.)

[solarsong-writes]

kanamafu week 2025 day 1

teatime

[solarsong-writes]

100k Word Commemoration! :))))))))))

For most of my life, my writing has been both subjectively and objectively terrible. This is an anecdote that I’ve been wanting to tell for a while now, ever since I started posting on AO3. It just never really felt like the ‘right time’ to post about it, but I figured commemorating 100k words posted on AO3 would be fun. This is by no means self-derogatory, but more so a reflection on my own writing journey that I hope may inspire other people to start writing. 

Warning: This is long.  

As I’ve mentioned, my writing was atrocious. Not that it was riddled with grammar or spelling mistakes – that was easy enough for me, since it’s following a set of rules. But, I couldn’t translate my ideas into words that flowed well or made much sense. I have a vivid memory from 6th grade, when we were put in groups to give peer feedback on the short stories we’ve written. We were supposed to pair up within the group to give one-on-one feedback and then rotate partners. But it immediately devolved into the entire group giving me feedback, and then the teacher joined in too because of the whole commotion! I remember sitting there, feeling mortified that my writing was just so bad that everyone wanted to try and help me. 

But perhaps you think, “Wait Solar! You could’ve just been bad at creative writing!!” 

Nope. This extended to all things writing. English historically was my worst subject, and nothing said this more than in high school when I had to write my very first AP (Advanced Placement) English essay. Since I was only a freshman at the time, the expectation for us was to score a four out of nine. Which is pretty low, and the grading rubric even defines a four as ‘inadequate’ and it means that an important idea was misread or missing and that the writing was ‘immature’.

Guess what I scored?

A one. 

Do you know how to score a one on an AP essay? You score a 0 only if you leave your paper entirely blank. You can repeat the prompt and add a single relevant sentence to score a one. I wrote an entire essay and scored a one. I was essentially tasked to reach inadequacy and failed. That’s where I was at with my writing for the longest time. 

But then how did I even get to where I am today? 

The short answer? Hard work.

The longer answer? Lots of hard work and constantly striving to be better.  

What kick-started this whole process was a good friend who was morbidly curious on how anyone could earn a one on the AP English essay and asked to see my writing. The best I could give her was the two I had written on the next essay as I couldn’t find where my one went – perhaps it’s for the best that it’s lost to time. She coached me on how to organize my writing and make sure that it’s clear. That every sentence served a relevant, overall purpose. That they logically flowed from one sentence to the next. These were things that didn’t require me to wax poetic at all. It just required me to arrange and rearrange my words and sentences in a way that was easy to understand. And by the middle of my sophomore year, I started writing 6s, which was on par where I was supposed to be. 

After my writing was at least understandable by others, I tried my hand at creative writing again. In my junior year of high school, I participated in NaNoWriMo (National Novel Writing Month), a challenge where you try to write 50k words in the month of November. I had always loved reading and I admired the people who wrote fanfic and posted it for the world to see, so I thought why not try it too? I made it to 24.5k words written, but the very act of going through the motions of writing, brainstorming, and writing more was eye-opening for how I should tackle future fics (aka figure out my plot beforehand lol). 

By my senior year, I was writing 8s and my writing assignments started being praised more than anything. It was also around this time when I started engaging in forum roleplay, where you conjure up a character, plop them in the specified setting, and interact with other people’s characters. Forum roleplaying requires you (unless you use a self-insert) to really think about a character’s past, their personality, their motives, and how these all combine to influence their behavior in the present. I learned how to characterize through it, and then challenged myself to roleplay characters that were very unlike me so that I can get into their headspaces. I looked at how other people would describe their environment and then started practicing how to write more descriptively. 

Even now, I’m still looking to improve. My dialogue tags have gotten better since I wrote To Walk Where the Light Shines. After being forced to worldbuild six completely different settings and convey it in a concise manner for Lives Etched on Our Palms, I think I’ve gotten better and more efficient at inserting that kind of detail. 

I think a lot of the time, especially when it comes to creative endeavors, it’s easy for other people to believe that the reason why we’re ‘good’ at it is because we are born talented. That there’s this intrinsic trait we have to make us good. But most of the time, that’s not true. It’s a matter of hard work and deliberate practice. I’m constantly looking to improve and I see differences in my writing from when I first started posting on AO3 compared to now. 

I also don’t believe that it’s ever ‘too late’ to improve or learn a skill. From my own experiences, life is a journey, and even if you move the needle a little bit today – that’s something and the only person you ever should compare yourself to is…yourself. Does it matter if other people are better? That’s saying you can’t ever be happy about your own accomplishments because someone out there has done all of these things but better. Which is absurd, in my opinion. Of course there’s someone out there better than me. That doesn’t matter because that never has or will diminish what I’ve accomplished for myself. I went from writing flaming dumpster fires to actually posting on AO3 and getting my research published. I did something I thought I’d never be able to do, and that holds meaning in it of itself – even if my fics didn’t take off like they have.  

Speaking of which, the reception to my fics has been especially heartwarming. Everyone has been kind and it always puts a smile on my face to read how my writing has been received. If not for the complete outpouring of support for To Walk Where the Light Shines – I’m honestly not sure how much Kanamafu I would’ve written afterwards (if you listen closely, you can hear my P5 WIPs gasping for air in the background). But genuinely, if you had asked 16-year-old me if I would ever write and post a fanfic, I would say “No. I don’t have the ability to. And that sounds way too scary.” If you told me that I would write a fairly popular fic for a ship I adore, I would say that you were delusional. 

What I’m trying to say with all of this is if you ever have looked at any of my writing and thought ‘that was good’ – you can do it too! I sincerely believe that you can. I’m not promising that it’ll be easy or quick, but I believe everyone can. So if writing has ever interested you, I encourage you to try it! Kanamafu Week is also coming up soon. ;)  

I hope this wasn’t too rambly or soapbox-y – if you’ve read this far, thank you! Happy 100k words to me, and I hope the next 100k words are even better! :)  

[solarsong-writes]

Chapter 6 of Amongst Flowers Without Names has been posted!!

I'll be taking a brief hiatus from this fic (approximately two weeks) to work on my Kanamafu Week offering, but after I will be refocusing on this fic. :)

[solarsong-writes]

i’d trade my happiness for yours.

[solarsong-writes]

This is probably the most frequent I've posted on social media, but Chapter 6 of Amongst Flowers Without Names is about halfway done, meaning there's a sneak peek! Hopefully this helps uplift any spirits from Chapter 5:

The Hanahaki removal procedure is typically used as an emergency option. While it is highly effective in curing Hanahaki disease – it is not without harmful side effects. The particular area of the brain that the disease flourishes in is the hippocampus, a key area for memory. Medical professionals and neurologists over the years have determined that the memory loss from the removal procedure is largely due to the damage to the hippocampus from the follow-up medication. But if only the surgery is performed, the disease will eventually re-infect the lungs and spawn a new plant. There are cases where only the surgery has been performed multiple times on a patient, but consecutive removal surgeries on the patient increases the risk of death and other complications during the procedure. Furthermore, the more the disease has progressed, the risk of the post-surgery medication additionally causing the patient to be unable to form new memories with the target of their unrequited love increases. Thus, if the removal procedure is deemed necessary, it is recommended to undergo it as early as possible to decrease this risk. 

—

“Just so you know, because this is a date, you’re paying!” Ena points her fork at Mafuyu.

“You were the one that invited me here,” Mafuyu responds. Ena had shown up earlier today at Kanade’s house and demanded Mafuyu ‘go out’ with her. When Mafuyu had asked why initially, Ena had retorted that it was ‘just in case’. Mafuyu had seen no reason to refuse, and Ena proceeded to aggressively drag her to this bakery.  

“T-that doesn’t matter!” Ena pouts and takes another bite of her cheesecake. 

“On typical dates, it is societally expected that the male pays. However, as we would not be a traditional couple, it would be on the onus of the inviter, not the invitee.”  

Ena stares at her. “And where did you learn that?”

“Mizuki lent me a book on dating etiquette.” Mizuki had actually given her many books, ranging from flower symbolism to dating to romantic relationships. 

Ena grumbles, “Of course she did.”

[solarsong-writes]

Chapter 5 of Amongst Flowers Without Names is out now! We're officially halfway through!!!

I'll still be prioritizing this fic through the month of June, even with Kanamafu Week coming up. I'd like to get this fic finished sooner rather than later, although it all depends on the amount of free time I'll have. Summer = time to catch up on research, unfortunately.

Hope you guys enjoy the chapter!

[solarsong-writes]

Chapter 5 of Amongst Flowers Without Names, a Kanamafu Hanahaki AU fic, is almost finished! Here's a sneak peek:

Content warning, just in case: very brief mention of self-harm and suicide ideation as a possible side effect. Warnings for the full chapter release include dissociation, bad reaction to medication, and almost self-harm.

Although medication appears to be a viable option at first, similar to the use of SSRIs or SNRIs long-term for a variety of mental illnesses – Hanahaki medication is specifically designed to evoke the emotional blunting side effect that can be experienced from these medications. Long-term use of Hanahaki medication increases risk of undesirable side effects, such as loss of appetite, low energy, increased risk of self-harm, and suicidal ideation. Furthermore, the medication only is able to temporarily halt the progression of Hanahaki disease and not cure it as Hanahaki-viable conditions still persist within the patient.

–

“Thank you for the tea, Miss Yoisaki,” her dad comments as Kanade carefully places a cup in front of both him and Mafuyu. 

Kanade clutches the leftover tray close to her. “It’s no problem, Mr. Asahina. I’ll take my leave now.”

Even though Mafuyu has had many talks with her dad here, for some reason she can’t bring herself to look her dad in the eye this time. 

“Have you been well, Mafuyu?” her dad asks, taking a sip of the tea. 

“Dad…I…” How would her dad react to her having Hanahaki? Wouldn’t this cause him to worry more about her? Just because she couldn’t figure out her own feelings? 

Her dad sets down his cup. “Is there something wrong? You know you can always speak your mind with me, Mafuyu.” 

Her dad has always been kind to her. Maybe it would be okay? Mafuyu stares at the liquid in her cup. “I…have Hanahaki disease.” 

“I see…have you been to therapy yet?” 

“...I don’t know who it is.” Each word feels heavy on her tongue, as if she’s admitting to a great crime. But was it not a crime to not know who the object of your affections were? In every romance media the conflict was whether or not to confess, if the feelings were reciprocated, if one love interest was better than the other, or something was wrong in the actual relationship itself – nothing like her current struggle. In fact, what kind of person didn’t know who they loved?

[solarsong-writes]

abnormal heat

[solarsong-writes]

So I may or may not have written and completed an entire one-shot today, titled You With the Stars, You With the Waves. If the title sounds familiar, it was definitely taken from the song Blue by Yung Kai.

The fic is inspired by @rockdrop's art piece, and written with her permission! It is set in post-canon, after both Kanade and Mafuyu have gone through some healing. It's more or less all fluff.

(For the people waiting on a Hanahaki AU update, I swear I will get around to it after the semester is over.)

Summary:

Kanade runs her fingers through Mafuyu’s hair until she feels Mafuyu’s breaths even out. Looking down at Mafuyu, it’s like Kanade is holding a star, or maybe the night in her arms.

When Mafuyu wakes up, it's to Kanade’s ocean blue eyes watching over her. Kanade herself is like the ocean, a place of peace and calm for Mafuyu.

Or

Kanade meets up with Mafuyu at her university campus.