Tumgik
somanywhatifs · 1 month
Text
Her phone buzzed as she left the scene A name and address on her screen She frowned; she'd had this job before "So… what? His ghost came back for more?"
"Just do the job", the answer read "And hope that this time he'll stay dead?" "It's just his twin", her boss replied "Who took his name after he'd died"
They'd used the twin line last time too She'd shrugged it off; what could you do? But rules be damned, she had to know Who was this man that wouldn't go?
She shadowed him throughout the day A normal guy in every way No signs that he'd been murdered twice But she'd been trained in catching lies
As she approached, he looked resigned He sighed, "I should have just declined" He closed his eyes, "Just make it quick, But know it probably won't stick"
She said, "I'm glad you mentioned it Your trick is good, I must admit But while my job knows plenty twists Repeat assignments can't exist"
"I just…" he shifted on his feet "I should have known that he would cheat" Confused, she asked him who he meant "My old imaginary friend"
"Turns out that he was pretty real A genie with a tempting deal If only I would set him free He'd grant me immortality"
"He didn't lie, I cannot die Which does not mean he doesn't try… For his amusement, every week He has me killed, well, so to speak"
"My heart will stop, I cease to breathe Just long enough to seem deceased My heart restarts, my wounds will heal But what remains, is pain quite real"
His tale ridiculous at best And yet his act left her impressed He seemed sincere, could it be true? She needed proof, a sign, a clue
She scanned the room, to no avail Her target shrugged, "He leaves no trail; He always wins, so do your job Believing me won't make him stop"
She shook her head, "Some friend indeed Who'd pay to watch his buddy bleed… I have this poison you could take For painless deaths, to catch a break?"
His eyes lit up, he whispered, "Thanks" Her last doubts vanished as he drank When he went down, she heard a whine "You spoiled my fun! Now he'll be fine!"
"I did the job you paid me for" She left the fiend to sulk some more She texted, "Boss, keep me in mind When hits on this guy get assigned"
The Assassin’s Code states that you must take any job, no questions asked. But you are pretty sure that you have assassinated this target a few times already.
8K notes · View notes
somanywhatifs · 2 months
Text
He just walked in one day A dazed look on his face No trace of fear Asked for a beer Looking wildly out of place
He had no horns, no tail No fur, no beak, no scales I served his drink He didn't blink Did he think my claws were nails?
No eyes at my cafe Had so far turned his way But just one whiff Should tell them if He was predator or prey
The werewolf caught his scent The gnome, with axe in hand Crept to the bar Ready for war Knew he had the upper hand
Just then, the man said "thanks" And paid, his eyes still blank He wandered out Ignored the crowd As we wondered, fluke or prank?
You run a secret, hidden café frequented by mythical beings. One day, a human somehow finds their way to the café. They have not noticed they are the only human, nor have the other patrons noticed them. Yet.
8K notes · View notes
somanywhatifs · 3 months
Text
To Protect
The castle walls stood wide and tall “To protect”, they said, “should villains call” The princess in its highest keep “To protect”, they said, “our moats run deep”
The princess grew up all alone Her father fighting for his throne Her mother long gone, lost at sea The guards her only company
She longed to see the town below Where she was not allowed to go Her only window placed so high That all that she could see was sky
The castle guards stood at her door “To protect”, they said, “an oath we swore” Its lock was made from sturdy steel “To protect”, they said, “from those who’d steal”
The friendly guards would tell her tales Of fights where righteous knights prevailed But most just glared and held their tongue The nice ones never lasted long
In search of ways to pass the time She’d stack some furniture and climb She’d reach her window, up the wall To watch the town, she’d risk a fall
The castle’s moats stretched wide and long “To protect”, they said, “from forces strong” The water filled with dang’rous beasts “To protect”, they said, “from being seized”
She had a tutor, old and frail Whose lessons she would oft derail Whenever they’d have class outside She’d drift towards the waterside
He’d call her back, voice laced with fear His words undoubtedly sincere The water’s whispers just too sweet Its vows of friendship hard to beat
The castle’s dungeons large and cold “To protect”, they said, “each foe we’ll hold” Its bars and chains a frightful sight “To protect”, they said, “from witch and wight”
Her nights would oft be plagued by dreams Of clanging chains and tortured screams With each new fright the need would grow To know just what went on below
She’d asked the guards but they’d stayed mum Her tutor lied, tried to play dumb For while she’d seen him climb those stairs He claimed he’d not set foot down there
The castle guards were fully armed “To protect”, they said, “from being harmed” Their weapons sharp, their shields unmarred “To protect”, they said, “our gates are barred”
She’d watch the guards as they would march Around the grounds, prepared to charge At enemies she could not see Who surely would be forced to flee
Their knights forever off to war On orders from their king afar His daughter wondered where they’d gone What battles they had lost or won
The castle’s drawbridge drawn up high “To protect”, they said, “to swim’s to die” For five young men, the bridge came down “To protect”, they said, “our throne and crown”
The princess sensed the tension, when Intentions never mentioned meant Each man would visit with the king In formal wear, and bearing rings
A seamstress made her three new gowns Embroidered each with golden crowns Her tutor came to say goodbye She cried for what that signified
The castle granted with her hand “To protect”, they said, “our wealth and land” Their vows exchanged, their match a fact “To protect”, they said, “we need this pact”
The princess knew she should have fled Each day spent wed brought more regrets His eyes betrayed unspoken needs Revealed a heart that beat with greed
The only upside to this turn The smidge of freedom she had earned A bigger room, no guards outside She went for walks - at least, she tried
The water stirred when she was near “To protect”, it whispered in her ear Its shadows rose up from the deep “To serve”, they whispered, “souls we’d reap”
Intrigued, she ventured closer still Convinced they bore her no ill will She stared until, to her surprise, The depths gazed back with yellow eyes
She noticed something probe her mind Its presence strange, yet not unkind She thought of questions, things unsaid Of all the times she’d been mislead
The shadows told her all they’d learned “To protect”, they said, “this throne unearned” “He lied to hide affairs depraved” “To serve”, they growled, “we’ve been enslaved”
A plan began to crystallise But she’d need space from prying eyes The shadows vowed to help her out To buy her time to plot and scout
Her husband grabbed her by the arm “Your wandering will cause us harm!” His voice was curt but she inferred He had not overheard a word
The shadows roared, the water soared “To protect”, they pledged, while she explored When she was done, the water waned “To serve… deranged”, the guards complained
Her husband first, an easy mark His arms her prison, after dark She poured him drinks to take control Cajoled until he’d take a stroll
She lured him to the waterside Intoxicated, he complied He hit the water with a splash His thrashing over in a flash
The shadows cheered through swirls of red “To protect”, they said, “we’d kill each threat” Their savage ways left her unfazed To live, she had no time to waste
Her father was a cautious man Requiring a different plan Obsessed with foes who never showed She’d bring the danger he was owed
To draw the king out to the grounds The water pushed beyond its bounds It rose up to the castle’s walls About to spill into its halls
The shadows surfaced with the surge “To protect”, they’d vowed, “we will emerge” She’d never seen the guards this scared “To serve!” They scattered, unprepared
She saw familiar yellow eyes In bodies twice a human’s size Inside and safe, the king yelled “Slay!” At guards soaked through, in disarray
They disobeyed, recoiled, and howled Took cover as the creatures growled “Protect!” They yelled, and meant themselves Her plan on track as bells chimed twelve
The dungeon’s entrance void of light To protect, she wondered, or to hide? No guards around, she walked right in To live, she found the strength within
On slickened stairs, besieged by air So stale it filled her with despair Her right hand tightened round a key She flexed the left one nervously
While passing rows of empty cells The unease deep inside her swelled What happened to their enemies? To all those creatures that they’d seized?
The dungeon’s silence seized her heart “To protect”, she whispered, breathing hard Just then she thought she heard a noise “To live…” A hiss, a broken voice
Ahead, a tiny ray of light Revealed which cell was occupied She swallowed hard, but kept her pace Afraid to think of what she’d face
Her footsteps slowed, her heart it raced Behind those iron bars, disgraced A dame who once knew great acclaim Sat underneath a dwindling flame
The dungeon seemed to shrink in size ‘To protect’, they’d said and meant their lies The woman drew a rasping breath To live at all she taunted death
The key she held with trembling hands (A prize she’d swiped when waves hit land) Was tough to turn with fingers slick But in the end she heard a click
She stopped herself from rushing in Was this the place she’d always been? She gazed into her mother’s eyes And wondered what she’d sacrificed
The dungeon held no captured knights To “protect” they’d lied, had flaunted rights The rightful queen they’d had detained To protect their reign, they’d kept her chained
The princess probed the chains turned brown And slammed the hefty key straight down On links grown weak from built-up rust Until the metal turned to dust
Beside the broken bonds she kneeled She felt so overwhelmed she reeled Her mother’s hands then found her own Repaired the bond they’d hardly known
The dungeon’s entrance far away ‘To protect…’ those words she’d heard each day Now stirred up rage, a war she’d wage To save her mother from this cage
Her mother’s eyes, so like her own Had dulled from all those years alone Yet at her touch they seemed revived The fighter in her still alive
But muscles atrophied, grown weak Could not support her frail physique The princess gathered all her strength And carried her the dungeon’s length
The castle grounds a battlefield “To protect”, they’d said, yet had to yield Defeated guards bowed heads and bled “To protect”, they’d said, yet most had fled
And in the centre of that scene The king was held up in between Three creatures, green, with scaly limbs Their grins foretold a fate quite grim
Her nearest allies rushed to aid And caught her mother as she swayed “Our queen!”, they murmured, reverent Their care for her was evident
The waters still, the king dethroned “To protect…”, her father gasped and groaned The princess met his pleading eyes “To live”, he moaned, “I’d pay each price!”
“You would?”, she mused, as she drew near “We do have cells to spare, I hear…” His face betrayed a trace of hope With ease he’d cope with threats this scope
The princess smiled, her mind unchanged “I guess some chains could be arranged…” “Yet why waste space, and guards, and bread On one not missed if he were dead?”
The water rose when called upon “To protect”, they pledged, “it shall be done!” The king let out a plaintive wail “To live-” he begged, to no avail
One final scream, one giant splash “At last it’s time to start afresh” Relieved, she watched the water spin As many allies dove back in
“Much cleaner than a guillotine…” Surprised, she turned to face the queen Her mother’s voice was soft, but fierce They shared a smile, their first in years
***
The castle walls stand wide and tall To protect and serve, and welcome all The princess spends her days outside To live the life she’d been denied
With time to heal, their captors slain Together queen and princess reign With no new threats, nor foes to beat A few new guards are all they need
Their wealth they share, their country thrives All people free to live their lives The water’s calm, the realm shines bright While yellow eyes keep watch at night
5 notes · View notes
somanywhatifs · 7 months
Text
Misconceptions Meet assumptions Sorely lacking Any gumption
Error drenched in Condescension Twisting all my Good intentions
Wishing you much Introspection As I end this Interaction
0 notes
somanywhatifs · 9 months
Link
““The Great Pacific Garbage Patch can now be cleaned,” announced Dutch entrepreneur Boyan Slat, the wonderkid inventor who’s spent a decade inventing systems for waterborne litter collection.
Recent tests on his Ocean Cleanup rig called System 002, invented to tackle the 1.8 trillion pieces of plastic pollution, were a success, leading Slat to predict that most of the oceanic garbage patches could be removed by 2040.
Intersections of ocean currents have created the massive floating islands of plastic trash—five slow-moving whirlpools that pull litter from thousands of miles away into a single radius.
The largest one sits between California and Hawaii, and 27-year-old Slat has been designing and testing his systems out there, launching from San Francisco since 2013.
GNN has reported on his original design for the floating device, but his engineering team improved upon it. System 002, nicknamed “Jenny,” successfully netted 9,000 kilograms, or around 20,000 pounds in its first trial.
It’s carbon-neutral, able to capture microplastics as small as 1 millimeter in diameter, and was designed to pose absolutely no threat to wildlife thanks to its wide capture area, slow motion, alerts, and camera monitors that allow operators to spy any overly-curious marine life…
Slat estimates ten Jennies could clean half the garbage patch in five years, and if 10 Jennies were deployed to the five major ocean gyres, then 90% of all floating plastic could be removed by 2040.” -via Good News Network, 10/19/21
76K notes · View notes
somanywhatifs · 9 months
Text
I feel like every ~new~ social media app takes us one step closer to returning to the message board days of yore, and I am here for it.
1 note · View note
somanywhatifs · 10 months
Text
I envy you if that's what "getting distracted" usually means for you. That's maybe the case for me about 2% of the time; the rest of the time it's just pointless (and endless...) distractions, and my brain isn't processing shit. 🙃
(I wouldn't be surprised if there are versions of this type of graph out there that make the distinction between "writing" and "planning out writing" though. Mine is just one of many.)
Tumblr media
13K notes · View notes
somanywhatifs · 10 months
Video
“Tiny round rain frog wakes up, yawns, rubs his eyes, then squeezes himself into his tiny hole”
(via)
31K notes · View notes
somanywhatifs · 11 months
Photo
Tumblr media
MEOW_IRL
73K notes · View notes
somanywhatifs · 11 months
Text
when you drop something and it falls right into another dimension, never to be seen again
0 notes
somanywhatifs · 11 months
Text
Tumblr media
0 notes
somanywhatifs · 11 months
Text
There was one of those hyperspecific polls that had an option like “your grandfather told you war stories that he never told anyone else” and now I feel like I have to tell the story about how a spider saved my grandpa’s life in WWII and how my family doesn’t kill spiders because we owe our existence to that One Single Spider
114K notes · View notes
somanywhatifs · 11 months
Text
Tumblr media
66K notes · View notes
somanywhatifs · 11 months
Text
May Prompts 🌺
Word prompts to use for doodling or writing
strawberries
adventure
golden hour
lake house
picnic
mayflower
nostalgia
homecoming
juice box
farmer’s market
morning light
birdsong
drive-in theater
island
photographs
riptide
coffee-to-go
tree house
instrument
cerulean
porch
animal shelter
lemonade
potted plant
spirit
milkshake
orchids
field
petrichor
sketching
memory lane
4K notes · View notes
somanywhatifs · 11 months
Text
Tumblr media
58K notes · View notes
somanywhatifs · 11 months
Text
End
It's getting late Darkness descending Sheep jumping fences Dream subjects pending
It's getting late The curtain has fallen Applause faded away Drunk patrons done brawlin'
It's getting late Ink dry, contemplating The story concluded The end of our waiting
1 note · View note
somanywhatifs · 11 months
Text
Cat
Little tiny tigers Prowling 'round the house Jumping on the counter Staring down a mouse
Curling up in blankets Sprawling on the floor Knocking over glasses Meowing at the door
Squeezing into boxes Liquid made of fur Good at making messes Forgiven when they purr
Petting ones that let me Risk that I might sneeze I would love to have one But they'd make me wheeze
1 note · View note