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moving accounts, am now @soong-type-delta
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instagram
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So I’m GQ and I usually hate being referred to as a girl except for when my partner says “you’re my girl” or things like that. Gender is really confusing but I’m figuring it out
i've heard this type of thing before and it seems to be kind of common for people to be ok with being called "girl" or any other gendered term they're usually uncomfortable with in very specific situations or by specific people. it's very possible that then it's not about the gendered connotations but about literally any other connotations that phrase might have for you. just remember that liking being called a girl by your partner does not invalidate your genderqueerness and the boundaries you set for this term with other people. you're good the way you are <3
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boundaries
do not interact with this blog at all if you:
make jokes about "feeling like you've been hit by a truck" or similar
are a TERF/radical feminist/gender critical
are a TIRF/baeddel
think that experiencing transmisogyny is limited to a transfeminine identity and experiencing transmasculinity is limited to a transmasculine identity (bigots don't care
are an aspec exclusionist or otherwise antiaspec
are a battle-axe bi
are against multispec gays, multispec straights or straight gays
believe in gender binaries (male vs female, masculine vs feminine, cis vs trans etc.)
think that aptobinary people don't have privilege over genderqueer/nonbinary/not binary people
are against neopronouns
are against xenogenders
are against microlabels
think neopronouns, xenogenders and microlabels are "for neurodivergent kids"
don't think self-diagnosis is valid
think people with personality disorders are inherently abusive/manipulative etc.
talk shit about hypoempathetic people
throw ableist slurs around
gatekeep multispec people from using certain terminology that has historically included us
when interacting with me in text form (reblog with text, tags, asks, DMs) do not:
use the suffix "-phobia" to refer to oppression
use the term "gay" in a way that reduces it to only men/queer attraction to men (like saying "gay history" when you mean "gay male/veldian history", self-description is fine obviously)
start a question about my identity with "how can you be x?"
tag my shit with "q slur"
use disabilities as metaphors
you all will get blocked.
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today's episode is a follow-up episode on the opposite of "queer".
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I feel like people who act as if disabled people can't handle neopronouns hasn't actually ever interacted with disable people or been in a mainly disabled people. Many can, and if they cant, auxiliary pronouns or just using the person's name always work. People are just using disabled people as a way to be exorsexist.
exactly! the whole "disabled people can't ever learn things" is incredibly condescending and ableist. it's also very obvious that they're talking over disabled people. every single person who brought this up in my inbox has talked about hypothetical disabled people rather than personal experience, which is very telling. they can't fool me into thinking they're neopronoun-positive.
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the queer community is so violently ableist about this shit. you can actually talk about oppression without being oppressive. to the people about to compare me to some chem experiment about water and oil: fuck you. i'm a literal person. to the phobic people about to tell me they don't mind: good for you. same people are still gonna hate you, so you might as well have compassion and be an ally to your fellow phobics.
anons stop being ableist in mh mentions challenge. i'm actually phobic. stop equating my mental illness to bigotry. bigots aren't bigots because of mental illness.
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as if i'm able to read whatever point you're trying to make when you're using ableism and all my brain can focus on is the trauma i went through from people thinking my phobias make me a horrible person. fuck you <3
anons stop being ableist in mh mentions challenge. i'm actually phobic. stop equating my mental illness to bigotry. bigots aren't bigots because of mental illness.
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this and this is relevant. not only is it ableist/saneist, it's also rooted in antiqueerness. maybe don't. anyway, that's all i'm gonna say to this, that's why the podcast exist. anyone who does this will get blocked. i don't need ableism, aka triggering shit, in my inbox, thank you very much. i don't want you on my blog.
anons stop being ableist in mh mentions challenge. i'm actually phobic. stop equating my mental illness to bigotry. bigots aren't bigots because of mental illness.
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anons stop being ableist in mh mentions challenge. i'm actually phobic. stop equating my mental illness to bigotry. bigots aren't bigots because of mental illness.
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As an intersex genderqueer person transmisandry, transmisogyny, and exorsexism are apart of my day to day experiences but I always feel like an invader trying to talk about these experiences, it sucks.
i'm sorry you're dealing with this. i'm not intersex myself as far as i know but i know that a lot of these conversations on these things so blatantly ignore the experiences of intersex people, while still claiming to be in community with you all. it's gross. i know how hard it is to be in these communities and not fit the gender binary or the cis-trans binary and experiencing exorsexism, transmisandry and transmisogyny because i'm androgynous. i can only imagine how hard it is to not fit the sex binary either.
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when someone calls me a "non-SAM ace" (which has happened before), i literally don't know what they mean.
do they mean that i experience my sexual and romantic orientation as one, referring to both as "asexual"? because that ain't it.
do they mean that experience *all* my orientations, even the ones beyond romantic and sexual as one single unit, calling it "asexual"? because that ain't it either.
do they mean that i'm "just ace" and nothing else? because that's not it either. i'm gay.
do they mean that i'm an ace without a romantic orientation? now that's me.
besides the fact that this term doesn't even come from aspec communities but from our enemies, the terms "SAM" and "non-SAM" really don't communicate much at all.
i'm not "non-SAM". i'm bi and ace. i'm varioriented. i'm quoiromantic. i'm a varioriented bi ace without a romantic orientation. i'm a quoiromantic bi ace. i'm many things but don't you dare call me "non-SAM". my attraction is neither "split" nor "non-split". my aceness and my pan-ness aren't "split off" from anything. they're not part of a whole. they are whole on their own.
there are many other useful terms that don't use this horrible term created by our oppressors. "varioriented" and "perioriented" are both older than the term "split attraction model". recently, people came up with the term "unit".
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genderqueer people are so deeply oppressed in trans communities, even those who don't identify as trans, by trans people with aptobinary privilege but also by many people who are somewhat close to the binary and expect the same of us.
cis people will not love you more.
"non-transmascs need to stfu about [things that are in no way exclusive to people with a transmasc identity]" is really just code for "i have a binary worldview and everyone who doesn't fit it needs to disappear".
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"non-transmascs need to stfu about [things that are in no way exclusive to people with a transmasc identity]" is really just code for "i have a binary worldview and everyone who doesn't fit it needs to disappear".
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people will really go on tumblr and basically say that disabled people canmot learn anything ever and think they're antiableist
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already got a blazed marvel post. the adpocalypse is closer than we think so heres your daily PSA
don't interact with corporate tumblr accounts
yes even to dunk on them. i don't care if you have the sickest burn of the century lined up, don't even give them the time of day
the eventual and inevitable fall of twitter marks a change in the advertising industry, and tumblr is unclaimed territory. if we want tumblr to remain the social media bastion it has become, it needs to remain as unappealing to corporations as possible. do not engage. in a marketing strategist's eyes, any kind of attention is good attention. don't "silence, brand" them. don't kungpowpenis them. don't send them hate anons. don't hate-follow them. corporate tumblrs are not a single entity and they will not be harassed off this site. we only have a shot at repelling them because of tumblr's lack of an algorithm. so turn off recommended posts on your dashboard, put it chronological order, and install an adblocker. if you don't seek out these blazed posts and actively ignore them when they happen upon you, the corporations will starve. in this case, the best kind of protest is a silent one
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i'm also very much a sensory seeker when it comes to taste and food texture. if a food isn't actively enjoyable in that way, it almost feels like a waste and doesn't satisfy me. and it's literally putting fuel into my body. it should be enjoyable, not shameful.
something i don't see talked about in either fat communities or ND communities is picky eating, but in a way where you happen to hate a lot of the food deemed "healthy" and "good" and like a lot of the food deemed "bad" or "unhealthy".
most ND people with sensory sensitivity around food who i see talk about this are thin with a more "acceptable" way of picky eating. fuck, even with literal ARFID it's believed that you cannot be fat and have ARFID. because for some reason, when you're a picky eater, you don't "pick" the "bad" food. the visible picky eater is thin.
and in fat communities, it's still all that "i'm fat, but exercise and eat healthily, so i can't help my fatness". it's full of people who wanna be "good fats" and not many people who eat intuitively or are picky eaters. the visible fat person eats a healthy diet.
not to forget that our thin-and-NT-dominant society thinks i'm making up my sensory sensitivity (aka disability) as an excuse to not "do anything about it", while some of them preach that fatness because of disability is "acceptable", but neurodivergence is not seen as a real disability.
so where does that leave fat picky eaters? i still struggle with internalised diet culture and antifatness. i still beat myself up over the food i eat or don't eat, despite my sensory sensitivities making it impossible to eat a lot of "good" food, despite my senses seeking for "bad" food. i still habe internalised shame of possibly having "caused" my fatness. i still habe internalised the idea that my disability is an "excuse" for me to stay fat. when fat is an okay thing to be in all cases.
people, including those affected because internalised anything fucking sucks, need to realise that fat picky eaters aren't lying about their sensitivity and that fat people with "unhealthy" diets (even those that aren't picky eaters)deserve just as much respect and there is nothing wrong with being either.
it's an intersection between fatness and neurodivergence that i never ever see talked about because it's just seen as "harming either cause".
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