#【 𝐎𝐎𝐂 】⚜ ❝ *to the tune of barbie girl* i’m a garbage man; in a garbage can .

[sunsbled-archive]

whatever you do, don’t imagine one part of your ship being “i have to leave for a while but when i return, do you want to get married?” and the other person agreeing except. they don’t return on the day they promised to return :’)

[sunsbled-archive]

are there any muses of mine anyone’s interested in possible dynamics in?? ‘cause otherwise i’ll just wildcard it with the ones who have the most options lol

[sunsbled-archive]

andean condor dragon it is. aight.

[sunsbled-archive]

gonna log out of this blog now. see y’all around. feel free to find me on discord (potatuh#6969) or msg me there for other means of contact, tumblr or not. idk. idc it’s up to all of you tbh.

stay safe, remember that you’re doing the best you can. i’m proud of you and i’m glad i got to meet all of you, it’s truly been an experience.

[sunsbled-archive]

dragon or andean condor,,

[sunsbled-archive]

NEW MUSE :     FANDOMLESS  .

NAME :    nikolas van helsing. ALIAS :    nik, nikolas holt . AGE :    thirty two . STATUS :    active . OCCUPATION :    writer .

LOCATION :    los angeles . WEAPON :    swords, whips, magic . MOTIVATION :    unknown .

HEIGHT :     194 centimeters ,   6′4 WEIGHT :    unknown . NOTABLE FEATURES :  brand mark on his left shoulder .

BACKGROUND :    descendant of abraham van helsing and official heir to their family legacy nikolas was raised as a monster hunter under strict rules. trained in the fields of fighting, hunting and medicine as well as receiving prestigious education he was the perfect next head to their families legacy. except nikolas never held any interest in such things. the second he’s turned eighteen he’s abandoned his blood and left for the united states wanting to write horror stories that would introduce a new wave of fans of the genre. and to use his education and knowledge of various monsters to instill accurate knowledge of these creatures in the general public to make it harder for monsters to trick them. except the genre as he knows it is over-saturated and refusing to give up his talents his agents requested for him to try his hand in another genre. 

and ever since he’s been stuck as a popular writer for romantic comedies, occasionally being permitted to dabble into other genres such as action movies or dramas; all of his stories have been turned into movies, popular beyond belief. and still, out of shame for his occupation nikolas refuses to publicly reveal his true identity to the world. instead going under the name of “n. holt” for his works and hiring actors to portray him in different public appearances and events. depending on the themes of his works he signs it under different names, though all of them for the most part feature at least one common theme. finding ones true self outside of family responsibility and expectations. 

though he tries to keep away from his old life, nikolas is haunted by several different entities, harassed by several monsters who decide that rather than simply kill the heir to one of their biggest enemies they’ll simply taunt him for his job and make him miserable. he refuses to succumb to these taunts, refuses to let these creatures lure him into embracing his heritage and instead simply tolerates their existence as though they’re annoying friends that come and go into his mansion as they please. it’s better than the occasional disappointed letter from his parents, even if they try to understand him and have long since mended their relationship with him. 

PERSONALITY :    despite the charming nature of him nikolas hides himself away behind a facade of cynicism and antisocial behaviour that seems ironically unfitting for someone who writes such tender romances. and yet that is simply the way he is; answering the questions of how he comes up with his ideas with dark responses that mirror the angry humour he has long grown fond of. “i was drunk”, “after suffering from the aftermath of taco bell” or even “got bitten by a rabid dog and thought that mutt needed some much needed love. so he was the protagonist of one of my stories” are all responses he’s given in the past.

he tends to hide away from people, keeps his distance out of the sheer frustration at how his life has turned around. and yet he refuses to give up his job in hopes that one day he’ll be able to follow his passion and write horror stories. it’s why he’s such a fond fan of the slasher genre, watches every single horror movie in existence and despite being revolted by certain themes he has watched every movie in existence, follows every new one. and his favorite pastime is writing an anonymous blog where he criticizes inaccuracies in movies with monster themes. under the alias “helvan” he’s grown rather popular on the internet for his cynical humor and the sarcastic way he tweets about things. 

his social tendencies are ... hard to determine. he has no real problem talking to people and yet he prefers being on his lonesome, it makes it easier to not tell people about his past, his family and his job. 

[sunsbled-archive]

fun fact about me you didn’t need to know: had my nursing career not worked out i would’ve bought a small farm isolated in the country side and raised farm animals.

[sunsbled-archive]

two paragraphs in and i already dread.

[sunsbled-archive]

Yes. To both

okay got it so i have to make a tiddies out kind of guy (or girl?? you weren't too specific sweetheart). noice.

also here just for you. you can hold antoines tiddies ig

[sunsbled-archive]

look at how pretty he is. i dare you.

[sunsbled-archive]

new cursed list brought to you by me, updated with new muses.

antoine 9.1 inches - 5.7 inches

basile 8.4 inches - 5 inches

sumayl 8.3 inches - 4.9 inches

ubaid 7.9 inches - 5.1 inches

lukas 8 inches - 5 inches

bael 12 inches - 7 inches unshifted, 5.9 inches shifted

cooper 8.7 inches - 5.4 inches

elias 7.2 inches - 4.9 inches

koda 8.6 inches - 5.4 inches

vincent 7 inches - 5.5 inches

leander 7.2 inches - 4.8 inches

ash 8.5 inches - 5.3 inches

hydell 7.9 inches - 5 inches

johnathan 7.1 inches - 4.8 inches

julian 7.7 inches - 5 inches

clay 8 inches - 5.4 inches

alexander 6.9 inches - 5.3 inches

zephyrus 7.5 inches - 4.9 inches

death 8.2 inches - 5.5 inches

shivon 7.6 inches - 4.4 inches

artyom 8.7 inches - 5.2 inches

argos 6.8 inches - 4.5 inches

anasthasius 7.5 inches - 4.7 inches

koujaku 6.4 inches - 5.4 inches

sousuke pre-death 5 inches post-death is variable because it’s a cybernetic one

jacob 7 inches - 4.6 inches

tartaros 8 inches - 5.2 inches

zhùlong 8.3 inches - 5.6 inches

howell 7 inches in human form - 4.8 inches

cain 7.7 inches - 4.9 inches

rainier 7.7 inches - 5 inches

talon 7.5 inches - 5.1 inches

the harbinger 21 inches BUT can make it smaller so usually like 6.5 inches

fenrir 16 inches - 8 inches

smok 6.7 inches - 4.4 inches

averey 7.7 inches - 5.2 inches

alec  7 inches - 5 inches

thom 5.9 inches - 4.3 inches

jin 6 inches - 4.1 inches

belial 6.9 inches - 5.4 inches

cal 8 inches - 5.4 inches

gavin 6.3 inches - 4.5 inches

grant 6.1 inches - 4.6 inches

aléxandros 8.2 inches - 5.4 inches

oro  8.8 inches - 5.5 inches

tatsuo 6.4 inches - 4.9 inches

gendyr 10.6 inches 

reuben 6.8 inches - 4.7 inches

jens 8 inches - 5.3 inches

prince 7.5 inches - 5 inches

tristan 7.1 inches - 5.3 inches

[sunsbled-archive]

POV :    someone has to knock the feral forest man down a peg or two so u do it

also bc i feel like this is a screencap redraw you’d enjoy i’m tagging u @solaoccasum​

[sunsbled-archive]

one of my muses survived getting shot in the side and thrown out of the 8th floor, one muse survived falling off a cliff near a mountain top and another muse survived getting set on fire and tbh :)

[sunsbled-archive]

what if i just

[sunsbled-archive]

anyways, antoine would randomly lift people up and just be like “do you know i’m really glad to know you?” and then carry them around like someone holding a cat like in the lion king and idk why it’s just a really cute image.

[sunsbled-archive]

does this mean i can quit my job now??