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undercoverclover · 3 years

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Chasing You

Chasing You

Chan x Original Character

Fluff & Angst

6,387 words

Summary: Starting a new semester at a new college can be difficult. That is, until you find your best friend and then fall for him and it comes back to bite you.

September

“Do you think this campus is going to have any good places have fun and sing karaoke? I know there wasn't any here last semester.”

“I’m not sure, you can always explore it once you get there.” My dad laughs, helping me carry boxes to the car.

“Why are you laughing? I didn’t just get my looks from you.” I snort. I love singing just like he does. I can’t help it… He stops and smiles, “I know. I’m just glad you don’t suck at it.”

“Dad!” I laugh but I can’t believe that just came out of his mouth. He’s laughing hysterically now and I’m afraid he might drop my box of breakables. I take the box from him, avoiding that situation entirely and set it in the backseat of my car.

“Alright, that’s it. When do classes start?” He asks.

“Tomorrow and I’ll only be a few towns over so don’t freak out. I’ll come visit when things aren’t hectic.” I say, giving him a hug and jumping in the car. I see him wave as I drive off.

A few hours later, I found my dorm, unpacked my car and collapsed on my bed.

“Hello?” I hear and sit up, startled at the voice.

“Hey! I’m Lili. Are you my roommate?” I ask the dark haired girl.

“I guess so, this is my room too. I’m Anya.” She smiles. I hold my hand out, smiling back and she shakes it.

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A month later-Oct.

I will never choose another college math class if I can help it. I hate this so bad. The only class I can’t ace without trying. Why do I have to have math anyway?

I stare down at the textbook and really want to throw it out the window. My phone dings and see it’s my roommate:

Anya- Let’s go out.

Me- I’m studying.

A-So what? You study all the time. You need a break.

Me- So, I still have to learn this stuff. I suck at math.

A- One night. Let’s go. No whining. Get dressed.

And don’t wear jeans.

Me- Ugh. Fine.

A- Okie, I’ll be there in 20 minutes.

I knew there was no arguing, once she sets her mind on things then I’m stuck. Which is fine, I normally have fun if we go out together.

I open my closet and notice she’ll expect me to wear something cute, especially the no jeans text.

She’s going to make me wear a skirt... She knows that I don’t have anything but jeans, a few skirts and a couple dresses. I’m not wearing a dress. I’m not cute anyway. Nobody likes me, I’m a nerd. I wear glasses, my nose bothers me, I have poofy hair that I typically throw up and though I’m not fat, I’m not skinny either.

UGH

I grab the black skirt out of my closet and the turquoise dress shirt. She hates me…

Thirty minutes later we’re on our way to... somewhere.

“Where are we going?” I ask, confused.

“For once, something we both never do.”

“Oh, god…” I groan, “I should have stayed home.”

“Why? It’s a nightclub, nobody knows us. Have fun.”

“You’re asking me why?” I grumble.

“You’ll have fun, just enjoy it.”

Walking in, it’s packed. There’s so many people. “Anya.” I suck in a nervous breath.

“You’ll do fine.” She says, as we walk in.

She holds my wrist as we make our way through the crowd and find a table, “Now, have fun.” She smiles.

An hour later, I’m tired from dancing and the heat in the room, taking a seat at the table.

“I’m so tired.” I grab my drink and take the last few sips of it, “Ready to go soon?” I ask.

“Yeah, I-” She’s stopped by a tap on the shoulder and looks up.

“Hello, I’m Donghun. I saw you dancing early, care to dance with me for a bit?” He says, rather politely. I bet he’s an ass.

“I would, but my friend and I are about to leave.” She says, frowning slightly.

“No, I’m fine. Go ahead and dance for a bit.” I smile, urging her on.

“Are you sure?” Giving her the dumbest, ‘Are you serious’ look ever, she gets up.

He holds out his hand and she takes it as I watch them heading towards the dance floor.

I lean back against my seat and sigh. “Are you bored?” A voice asks. I look up and notice a tall man with black hair in a white unbuttoned dress shirt,with a black shirt underneath.

“N- No. Just tired.” I answer and he smiles brightly, “May I sit?” He asks and I nod.

“I’m pretty sure my friend may have stolen yours for a while.” He chuckles, looking towards Anya and Donghun.

“Oh? Your friend, so you’re the wingman tonight then?” I smile.

“No, not really. Um, we were just out with another friend, but he saw your friend and here we are.” He chuckles.

“Aw, well that’s Anya’s charm I’m afraid.” I chuckle.

“Anya’s, huh? That’s cute. What about you? Do you have any charms?” He asks.

“I don’t even know your name, nor you mine. Why should I tell you?” I smile sweetly, making him laugh a high-pitched laugh.

“Fair point. I’m Yuchan.” He smiles lazily, holding out his hand.

“Lili.” I smile, shaking his hand.

“Nice to meet you, Lili.”

“Nice to meet you too.” I smile.

“Also, I’m pretty sure I don’t have any charms.”

“Everyone does, maybe you just don’t see it.”

“Eh, maybe.” I shrug,

“Hey, Lil who’s this.” Anya asks, walking up with Donghun on her heels.

“This is Yuchan, Donghun’s friend and Yuchan, this is Anya.” I smile, gesturing to her.

“Hello, nice to meet you.” He smiles and nods slightly.

“Did you have fun?” I smirk, watching her face turn red.

"I did, but if you're ready to leave, we can go." She says in almost a pouty voice.

"I'm fine if Yuchan can keep me company for a bit longer?" I say, looking over towards him.

"How about it, Chan?" Donghun pipes in, smiling.

"Yeah, I'm happy to do that and you can call me Chan if you want." He smiles.

I avoid looking at his eyes but look over at him and then Donghun. They're too handsome to be here, I feel myself getting lost in my head for a second.

"You wanna dance?" I hear Chan say, snapping back to reality.

"Pardon?" I ask, unsure I heard him right.

Anya motions for Donghun to tell him a secret and he smiles.

"Do you want to dance?" He asks again.

"Oh, I- uh.. I-" I stumble.

"Just once? Please?" He smiles and gives me the softest eyes in the world.

"I- I can try." I stutter, unsure of what to do now, but feeling my face turn red.

I look up at Anya, who's wide-eyed and smiling and feel my cheeks getting hotter…

"Let's go." Lee says, patting Anya's side. She looks up and nods, "We'll see you out there?"

As they walk away, I mutter, "Lord, I hope not."

"We don't have to dance." Chan says.

"No. No it's not that. I'm just not a great dancer and I'm clumsy."

"Don't worry, I'm clumsy too, but only off the dance floor." He winks and I chuckle, blushing more.

He holds out his hand for me and I take it, getting pulled excitedly to the dance floor.

“Since you think you’re not a great dancer, I’ll help you. Don’t worry.” He smirks, looking back at me.

“I don’t know if I should be more worried or happy about that.” I laugh, following him towards the back.

“I figured by the sound of it, you didn’t want them seeing you. It’s different when you don’t know the people, you can forget about them.” He turns around, grabbing my other hand and pulling me close.

“You’d be correct.”

“Well, don’t worry about any of them.” He smiles lazily. We begin dancing and having fun, I step on him once and he laughs about it. Yet, I feel embarrassed and avoid his feet as best as I can. Eventually, I get a better understanding and it’s because he leads amazingly.

“Chan, we’ve gotta get back soon.” We hear over the loud music. I stop and turn around to see who was standing beside him, someone I didn’t recognize.

“Alright, give me a few minutes. Have you found Donghun yet?”

The man shakes his head, “I’ll go look for him, meet me outside in a few minutes.”

“Alright Jun.” Jun, apparently that’s his name, turns around and leaves and Chan looks at me.

“Let’s find Anya and Donghun. He looked agitated.”

I nod and Chan leads us back to where we were. We find Anya and Donghun already talking to Jun at the table we had been sitting at earlier.

“What’s up?” Chan asks Jun.

“We’ve gotta go.”

“Why?” Donghun asks, seeming annoyed. Jun looks at Chan and I and then back at Donghun and Anya and grumbles.

“We just do, alright?” I don’t know if that meant something, but they were all on board to leave now and Donghun was talking to Anya about something and Jun was apologizing for having to drag him away. They were having fun.

“Sorry, I have to go. I’ll see you around sometime?” Chan asks, looking down at me. I look up and smile, “Sure. Especially if they end up dating.” I laugh but only joking.

We head outside and part ways, walking as quickly as possible to our car since it’s cold.

“Did you get his number?” Anya asks me and I look at her like an idiot. “No, why would I?”

“Um, because he’s hot, kind and was dancing with you?” She snickers. I roll my eyes and want to facepalm her, “So? He probably has a girlfriend. I’m never that lucky.”

That next week, Donghun stopped by a few times and I could see what it was turning into. They were dating within the next month. Jun and Chan even came a few times after that, I’d take a break from papers or homework and hang out but never staying very long. Chan and I became really good friends and by February, we talked to each other every day. Often going out for dinner or movies, nothing more than friends though I wish differently.

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March

“It’s definitely different. But I’m happy for you.” I smile at my best friend, though I don’t really feel happy. I hope he can’t tell from the screen...

“I know, but I wanted to tell you before Donghun found out by snooping through my phone.” Chan says, running his hand through his hair. I wish I could.

That thought immediately leaves my mind as soon as it appears, “So, when can I meet her?”

“Soon, I hope. She’ll be over tomorrow if you want to meet her. Maybe we can go get coffee?”

“Sounds good! I can come by around 11, is that alright?” I ask, making sure I have enough time to get my workout in first. “Yeah, sounds great. I’ll see you tomorrow. Goodnight, Lil.”

“Night, Chan.” I wave at him and end the video call. I crawl into bed and put my headphones in, wishing I could forget the conversation fresh in my mind. Chan has a girlfriend…

I knew it would never be me, but a girl can dream.

My alarm goes off and I sit up, debating on whether or not to break it. I’ve worked too hard to quit now though so I get up and dress in my workout clothes and take off for the gym. Letting out my frustrations there always makes things better, though I stay an hour over and have to rush to shower and practically run to the coffee shop now.

“Sorry I’m late.” I say, hunching over to put my hands on my knees and catch my breath.

Chan laughs and I look up, “It’s alright Lili. Morning workout?”

I nod and finally notice the girl next to him at the table he’s sitting at. She’s pretty. She has dark curly brown hair and a button nose with hazel eyes and full lips. She’s skinny and I’m already jealous of her for one reason, now I have to add another?

“Lili, this is Sam, my girlfriend. Sam, this is Lili, my best friend.” Chan says, introducing us before his phone rings. “Sorry, gotta take this.”

I nod at him but decide to try for him. “Hey, nice to meet you.” I smile at her.

“Yeah, you too.” She replies. Great.

“Lili, did you want any coffee?” Chan asks, not hearing how rude Same was a second ago.

“Sure. I can get it though.” I chuckle and start to stand before I’m given the look from him. I sit back down and hold my hands up in surrender, “Fine. Fine. My cappuccino, please?”

“Done. I’ll be right back.” He turns to Sam, “Do you want anything else babe?”

“No, I’m fine. Thank you though.” She says in a cutesy voice and smiles and I want to gag. Chan gets up and heads inside to order, leaving just us girls.

“It’s really nice to-”

“Let’s get one thing straight. You may be his ‘best friend’ but I’m his girlfriend. From here on out, I come first. I matter more and don’t even think about telling him this because I will make sure he believes me over you.” I stare at her in shock and if I didn’t dislike her before...I do now.

“And another thing, don’t try to push me away. He’s not into you sweetie.”

Chan walks out with my drink and if it wasn’t for him I’d have come across the table swinging at her big head.

“Here, Lil.” He smiles and I smile back, just not feeling like being here anymore. And believe me, it didn’t get any better after that.

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April

“Chan!” I yell from the science lab. He turns and waves, jogging back to meet me. His smile making my heart skip.

“Hey, I haven’t seen you in over a week. Where’ve you been?” He asks, worriedly.

“Come in here if you’re going to talk. I happen to see you walk by but I’m busy.” I smile and turn back into the lab.

“I- shit. One second, okay?” He says, pulling out his phone and calling someone. I hear him talking but I can’t tell who he’s talking to...probably Sam.

He hangs up, looking annoyed now and walks into the lab with me.

“Are you okay?” I ask, leaning up against the counter.

He nods, “Yeah, I just rainchecked Sam. She’ll live though.”

“Chan! You didn’t have to. You should have just texted me and we could have talked.” I roll my eyes, but not denying I’m super happy that he blew her off just this once for me.

“It’s done. Now, what are you doing here and why have you been gone for so long?” He asks, leaning on the opposite counter to face me and see what I was doing. I’ve never lied to him and I won’t start now.

“I’ve been sick and instead of getting Anya sick, I went home so my dad could take care of me. I’m in here because this is my last class and nobody is in here after that, so I use it as a place to study instead of the library.”

“Liliana! Why didn’t you tell me?” He exclaims and I shush him a little. The bewildered look on his face makes me feel bad for not calling him more than I tried. “That’s bullshit. I could have helped.”

“I’m sorry. I didn’t want to get you sick either. I was hardly in any shape to see anyone.” I plead.

“What did you have?”

“I had the flu.”

“Lili..” He says, feeling defeated. He walks to my side of the counter and sighs, “What am I going to do with you?”

“I’m fine now.” I shrug. He pulls me in for a hug that made me feel safe. I feel tears in my eyes; I haven’t had one since he started dating Sam…

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May-Night Before Graduation

“Lil? What’s this?” Anya asks. I look up at her, “Anya! What are you doing?” I jump up and grab my phone from her. She looks at me in confusion and I sigh and turn off my phone. I have got to stop reading that damn text.

“I’ll ask again...What was that?”

“Nothin’ Anya, don’t worry about it.” I grumble.

“Don’t worry about it?” She says, raising her tone at me for the first time ever. “Since when do you lay down and die when someone tells you to do something?”

“I’m not. I’m avoiding a situation.” I feel my throat close in emotion and stop talking.

“Tell him.”

“No.”

“Liliana, tell him.”

“No, Anya.”

“Then I will. Let me see your phone.”

“For fuck’s sake, no Anya!” I scream and walk out the door. I take a walk around campus, not caring that it’s almost midnight. I walk and cry and walk. Just looking at the message, my finger hovering over the delete button. I wipe the tears from my eyes, feeling like a pansy, and hit delete. Now it’s gone...nobody else can see it and I turn to walk back to my room.

When I walk in the door, Anya’s waiting for me. “I’m sorry.” She’s frowning and pouting and I want to laugh and be upset at her at the same time.

“It’s okay. I know you mean well. Let’s just forget it.”

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Graduation Day

“You’ll do great.” I smile at Anya.

“I’ll try, but don’t trip going up on the stage.” She laughs and she finishes my makeup. There’s no way she’d let me out of this dorm without makeup on for graduation. None.

“I’ll do my best, no promises.”

“Well, just don’t look at Chan and you’ll be fine.”

I open up my eyes and look up at her, “What do you mean?”

“Oh, please. Don’t tell me you don’t like him.” She mumbles, seeing the dorm door open. “I don’t!” I say a little louder than I mean to.

“Don’t what?” Donghun asks, followed by Chan.

“Don’t- uh. Don’t want her to do anything else to my face.”

“It looks good the way it is.” Chan smiles.

“Fine. I’ll leave it.” She rolls her eyes and walks behind the pair to get into the closet, winking at me from behind them. I roll my eyes and feel anxious now, but all that anxiety leaves when Sam enters the room and I have to fight the urge to ruin my nails one of our other friends made me get done.

“Let’s do this.” I clap, standing up and walking towards the door. As much as I want to stay here, I can’t.

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To: Chan

I know you haven’t seen this.

I thought you should before it’s too late.

Do you really think he feels some type of way about you?

Who is this?

Who do you think? Leave him alone. He doesn't need or want you. You're the last person to cross his mind. Just do yourself a favor and forget him.

It was a screenshot of a text. It was between Lili and someone...Son of a-

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2 Years Later-December

“Lili, what are you still doing here? Work can wait. Get going!” My friend scolds me.

“I’m almost finished writing.”

“You’re losing daylight. The song lyrics can wait. Go and get home, enjoy your break with your dad. Tell him I said hi.” She smiles and wiggles her eyebrows.

“You are so gross, but I will.” I laugh, “I’ll see you when I get back! Don’t get famous until I get back!” Grabbing my jacket and my laptop bag, I turn to make sure everything is once again off.

“I wouldn’t dream of it without my partner. Now go!”

“I’m going! I’m going! I’m already out the door! Bye!” I wave and rush out the door, towards my car.

I’m so behind now… I got more work done than I thought I would though.

I pull out my phone and let my dad know I’m on my way and sorry because I got stuck at work. He replies be careful and a meme with a speeding car… He knows me well.

7 hours later, I’m pulling into my dad’s snow covered driveway, exhausted.

“Lil!” I hear my dad and hop out of the car, just to hurry and hug him. “Hey dad, how are you?”

“Who are you?” He gasps, looking me over, “Where’s my daughter?”

“Very funny! These looks aren’t going away.” I laugh pointing to my face. He messes my hair up and tries to turn me around to kick my butt. “Yep, there she is.” He says, “C’mon. Let’s grab your bags and get you inside. It’s freezing. Was your drive okay?”

I nod and hurry back to grab the few bags I brought, dragging the smallest one inside. “Are you hungry? Thirsty?” He asks.

“No, I’m super tired though. Care if I sleep already?” I ask, bobbing my head towards my old room.

“No, go ahead.” He smiles, “I’ll see you in the morning then.”

“Night dad.”

Walking into the bedroom of the past, I smile. Nostalgia hits though it’s only been 2.5 years.

I left this place behind and almost everyone around it. Anya and my dad are the only ones that I kept in touch with. I couldn’t bear the thought of seeing that wench every day or hearing about her either, so I cut off ties with Chan. It hurt, hell, it hurts today.

I throw my bags down on the floor, change and wash my face and fall face first down into my bed. It’s still just as uncomfy as ever but I’ll take it. I missed this too.

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“About time! Wake up! We have things to do and people to see! Let’s go. Up. Up. Up.” I hear someone and then feel someone rolling me around on the bed, attempting to wake me up.I’d become a heavy sleeper…

“Mmmm.”

“Nooo, wake it up woman!” Anya laughs, “Let’s go eat and get coffee.”

“My eyes flutter open and I see my friend standing there and I smile, “Anya! What are you doing here?”

“Come on, up. Your dad said I could have you today since he has to work.”

“You talked to my dad?”

“Yup, when you left-”

“No, it’s alright. I don’t want an explanation.” I say, honestly. That’s an old part of my life and it just needs to go away.

“So, come on. Up. We’ve gotta meet Donghun for breakfast and coffee.” She smiles and smacks my leg which is still cozy under my blanket.

“Alright, I’m up. I’m up. Let me throw some jeans on and a tank top.” I stand up and see her eyes widen. I look down to make sure I still have pants on and nothing is messed up, “What?” I ask when everything looks normal.

“Where did you go?” She asks, meeting my eyes.

“Really?” I put my hand on my hip.

“Lili, you look amazing!” She laughs and I smile, bowing to her. “Thank you. I’ve worked my ass off.”

“God, if Ch-” She cuts herself off but I already know what she’s going to say. “It wouldn’t change anything.” I say, “Now, let me change and we’ll go eat. I’m starving.” She nods, avoiding my gaze now.

I nudge her with my shoulder and smile, grabbing my bag to go change.

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“Donghun!” I squeal as I see him sitting in the booth as we enter the diner. He smiles widely and stands up, holding his arms open for a hug, “Hey, Lil. Long time no see.”

I squeeze him and he squeezes me harder to where I feel like I could pop like a balloon.

“Ah! I missed you.” I say happily. The smile on Anya’s face is priceless and we take a seat, staring at the menus on the tabletop.

“How’ve you been?” He asks, smiling and I see him take Anya’s hand that’s sitting on the table. I smile, wanting to ogle at them. “I’m alright. Working and being a homebody.” I chuckle.

“So nothing’s changed much then? Besides the obvious.”

“Nope, nothing’s changed.” I can’t stop smiling, I’ve missed them so much. “How have you been? I know Anya’s been working a lot too.”

“I’ve been good. Teaching vocal classes at the school this year.”

“Donghun, that’s great!” I put my hand over my mouth in awe. Then I see the waitress come up to take our order. I order something I haven’t had in a long time, indulging for once, “I’ll have the cheeseburger and loaded fries with a sprite, please.” She nods and the other 2 order as well. I hope I can eat all of that…

We eat and talk, just like old times and I couldn’t be happier.

“Anya? Help me pick out some ice cream from the freezer?” Donghun asks, pointing to the freezer in the corner. “Sure.” She says, getting up and I start to get up but Donghun tells me to stay here. I don’t understand why, but okay.

They walk over and then my view is blocked, “Lili…?”

I look up into the brown eyes I swore I’d never see again, “Ch-Chan? Wha- What are you doing here?” I can’t be here. I need to leave and I start to get up and grab my things, emotions flooding back that I’d buried for so long. Movie nights, dinners, his hugs and feeling safe..No. I can’t.

“Lili, please don’t leave. Just give me a minute.” He says and I put money for my food on the table and walk out the door, not looking back.

I hear the bell ring on the door and hear running before they stop, “Liliana!” I pause at my full name, rarely ever hearing it from him. It always sounded sweet. Tears fall down my face and I wipe them away then look back at him.

“What do you want, Chan?” I ask, feeling defeated.

He walks up to me and looks into my eyes. I can see his jaw tense and his hand start to move but stop, “Give me an hour. Please?” He begs.

“Cha-”

“Liliana, please?”

I nod and let him lead the way. He leads me to a black sports car that doesn’t fit him at all besides he likes speed, and he opens the door and I see yellow seats.

“Hop in.”

“This is yours?” I ask incredulously. He only nods and offers again. I do so and sit my stuff down as he’s walking to the driver’s side. He starts the car and I look at him to ask where we’re going.

“We’re going somewhere that I go when I want to think.” He says without even looking at me and drives away. The ride is silent and I sit there and fidget with my nails, “Quit before you break one.” He sighs and I look over at him in a double take. I stop and look out the window, biting my lip now and wonder where we’re going because he’s driven outside of town.

We pull up to a lake on the outskirts of town, about 8 miles from the college and I get out, looking around.

The freshly fallen snow, only touched by rabbit paws and the trees weighed down.

Walking up beside me, I see his breath before I see him. “Come this way, there’s a place to sit and stay warm over here.” He leads me towards a little fishing cabin, not very big, but big enough to start a fire in and talk.

He puts some firewood in the pit and starts a small fire, “It’ll be warm in just a minute. Don’t worry.”

“I’m not. I’m still used to the cold. I left but I didn’t stray too far.” I mutter. I watch the fire grow, getting lost in it for a minute.

“Why’d you leave?” He asks and I can hear the pain in his voice. I look up and see it written on his face too. This was a bad idea.

“I shouldn’t have come here today.” I grumble, standing up and trying to walk past him to get to the door. He stands up, blocking my way, but not angrily, “Wait. Please?”

“I can’t do this, Chan.” I sigh.

“You don’t have to talk then, just listen.” He insists. I close my eyes and nod, turning around and moving back to my seat. I hope I made the right choice.

“For starters, I’m really freaking happy to see you. You look great, not that you didn’t before and I wanted to tell you that at the diner but you ran. But you look amazing, I’m really proud of how far you’ve come.” I look up at him, in shock at what he just said. “Anyway, I don’t want to get off track. I know Liliana, I know about what Sam did.”

My heart stops. I didn’t want this today and I didn’t want him to ever know what had gone down. How did he find out? “H-H-How?” I stutter.

“You really want me to tell you how I found out?” He asks, looking shocked. I nod.

“Anya sent a picture of it to Donghun the day of graduation. Actually right after we walked... He sent it to me but I’d broken my phone, remember? Not everything was coming through when it should have, especially photos. I didn’t get it until the next day.” I hear the anger in his voice and the tears in my eyes start to fall. She must have taken the photo before she asked me what it was, knowing I wouldn’t tell her.

“She should have left it alone.” I grumble.

“No, you should have fucking told me earlier, Liliana.” He stands up and glares down at me. He’s never been angry at me and I don’t think he’s truly angry this time, just hurt.

“Why? You were happy.” I look up at him, acting unaffected but my heart is shattering into pieces.

“Yeah, because I wanted to be happy with someone who was treating you like shit.” He says sarcastically. I stop what I’m going to say and just stare.

“What was I supposed to say? She said you’d never believe me and after everything that’s gone wrong before, do you really think it felt that far off for me?”

“You knew me better, you should have come to me.” I see a tear fall from his eye and I don’t want to be here anymore. This is breaking me.

“I wanted you to be happy, that’s not changed.” I say, standing up and trying to walk around him towards the door. He’s too big, I can’t unless I step over the fire.

“I broke up with her that day. I broke up with her the day after graduation and came with Anya looking for you. You left without saying goodbye, you left me. You could have given me a chance, taken a leap of faith on me.” He chokes out.

“She broke me, Chan.” I sob, hiding in my hands. “You knew what I was like back then and how I was growing up. I told you and I care too much for you to see you unhappy.” I feel his arms wrap around me and for the first time since that day in the science lab 2 years ago, I feel safe.

“I do know and that doesn’t change the fact that you should have come to me then. I would have believed you over her anyday of the week.” His hand pushes my head up gently, looking at my eyes, which are probably red and swollen now.

“Really?”

He nods, “Of course. You knew me better than anyone. Probably still do.”

This time I let the tears flow freely. I had held them back for far too long and he just holds me while I cry. “Lili?” He says softly.

“Yeah?” I answer, drying my eyes on my coat.

“Do you remember the night we met? The night in the club?” He asks. I look at him confused, I don’t understand why he’s bringing this up now… But I nod, “Yeah? Why.”

“You know that night, we were there for Jun but he was dancing and once we saw you two, we just kind of left him. That’s why he was so aggravated. We were supposed to be his wingmen but Donghun saw Anya and was hooked and once I started talking to you, I was too.”

“You’re my best friend, I mean..were my best friend, Chan. We hung out and it was great.” I smile sadly.

“You’re not getting the point, dork. I loved being around you. You made me feel better, always. We were always talking or texting or hanging out. It was everyday. Anya and Donghun and you and I. It wasn’t awkward and it wasn’t anything we worried about, it just happened and I hadn’t realized it until you left that day.”

His words hit home.

“I’m sorry for not realizing it sooner and I’m sorry that I didn’t know that she was being such a witch to you. I never meant to hurt you-”

“You didn’t hurt me, Chan. I did it to myself. You’re right, I let her get to me and I should have known better. I knew you back then and knew you would believe me but I was afraid that my feelings for you were getting in the way and making me overreact.”

“Feelings for me? What do you mean?” He looks down at me.

Well, I messed that up. I never wanted to admit this to anyone and now I ruined that. Fuck it.

“Yeah, feelings for you, smart one. I’d had a crush on you for the longest time. The night at the club, you had me interested but when we went to dinner the first time was when I knew.”

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February 7th- 2 years ago

“What are you doing?” I laugh as he grabs his wallet and keys.

“Come on, we’re going out too.” He says, holding out his hand. I look at him in confusion and wonder why.

“Okay?”

“If Anya and Donghun aren’t going to be home then neither are we. Let’s go. We’re going to dinner.” He smirks.

“Chan! It’s snowing!”

“So what? Then we can get soup and hot chocolate.” And that’s exactly what we do. The snow fell hard enough to make it annoying to drive in but nothing too difficult. We pull up to the diner we always visit and run in, freezing since his car doesn’t have heat.

“You’ve gotta get that fixed.” I whine.

“I will. When I get a better job.”

We take a seat at the back of the place, where we always do and I order potato soup and water, reminding myself to get hot chocolate later. Chan orders chili and pepsi and I regret my decision. I want his..

“Man, I should have gotten what you did.” I grumble.

“Why didn’t you?” He asks.

“It didn’t sound good when I thought about it.” I answer honestly.

I start to eat my food, though he tries to switch me and I swat his hand away. Laughing and trying once more before giving up.

“Let me eat the food I don’t want Chan.” I laugh.

“I eat anything though, so either one sounds fine to me.” He smiles.

“Yes, but I ordered it. Not you, I’ll eat it. It’s fine.”

“Share?” He asks, pouting.

“You’re joking.” I giggle.

He sticks his spoon in my soup, taking a bite, “Okay, you may not get any of it.” He chuckles, reaching for another spoonful.

I look at him and just laugh hysterically and he looks at me with soup on his lip now. I lean up and take my thumb and swipe it across, cleaning it off.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Present

“Really? At the diner?” He chuckles, remembering too.

“Yep.” I say, popping the ‘P’. I don’t even notice, but I feel more relaxed now and finally I notice, I’m still being held by him and my heart beats faster.

“Wow, so if only.”

“If only?” I ask.

“If only I’d have realized then what I realized the night I found out that you had left.”

My heart beats out of my chest, “What did you realize?” I was almost too afraid to ask.

“Are you seeing anyone now, Lili?” He asks, out of nowhere and my automatic response kicks in, “Um, no?”

He leans down and his lips meet mine and I lose all air from my lungs. I close my eyes, feeling lost in a dream. It’s not a deep kiss but it’s sweet and lasting. He pulls away and I wonder if I was dying from frostbite somewhere in a delusional state of bliss.

I open my eyes and see him smiling down at me, “Wha- what did you realize again? I’ve forgotten how to think.” I say sarcastically. He leans down, planting a softer kiss on my lips and I didn’t think that was possible.

“That I should have been looking in front of me the whole time. Instead of chasing something I was blinded by that wasn’t special to me in any way, I should have been chasing you.”

“I’m sorry I ran and didn’t have faith in you.” I say, trying to avoid tears again.

“It’s not your fault and you’re here now. Do you forgive me?” He asks.

“There’s nothing to forgive. I tried to protect you to make you happy.”

“Yeah, well you make me happy.” He smiles.

“You make me happy too.” I smile back, standing on my tiptoes before kissing him again and he tangles his hand in my hair, “Can we go back to your car now? I can’t feel my fingers.”

“Sure, Lili. Sure. But we have a lot to talk about later.” He smirks, kissing me one last time and turning to put out the fire before we head back to the car as fast as possible.

#a.c.e #acewriters #a.c.e chan #kang yuchan #yuchan #에이스_찬 #에이스

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