#'m mostly fine. I was just thinking about what the future is going to be like 30 years from now and if I'll ever actually accomplish anythin

[icewindandboringhorror]

I think the hardest thing in writing for me sometimes is the like “show don’t tell/let people communicate through subtext/Normal People don’t just walk around openly explaining their motivations for everything That’s Unnatural” thing because like.. I literally DO walk around openly explaining my motivations for everything, that is how I talk, I am an analytical detail oriented over-communicator who explains everything as thoroughly as possible and and will give a fully detailed 2 minute long answer to something simple like “how are you doing today?” .. like it’s hard to make things sound Natural and Normal when you yourself are inherently unnatural and abnormal in your methods of communication to an extent lol

[babygazette]

HOW I BECAME YOUR MOTHER

synopsis : rafe meets your strict parents for the first time and the dinner goes to shit. rafe takes it out on you after and keeps his word.

warnings : minors dni, 18+ smut, passive aggressive parents mostly reader’s dad, talks of impregnantion, mainly oral (m!receiving), light mention of penetration, p in v.

author’s note : i think the timeline is a bit fucked up and yes ward is actually dead in this, i can bend my fics however i want so welp. hope you enjoy anyways!!

word count : 1,273

📠 📰 ────────*𑁍༘⋆ ────────

it really depends on which rafe it is. s3!rafe would do well cause mature businessman or whateva but s2!rafe is funnier because its

— a complete disaster. that is what it was. you knew you should've never let this cocaine addicted psycho dumbass of a boyfriend meet your strict parents. it's a recipe for disaster and disappointment. you had been putting this off for so long until your parents insisted on inviting your boyfriend over and here you were.

"babe, come on you look fine!" you huffed out at rafe who was currently freaking out in the car because he hates parents but he loves you so. "just be yourself, they'll love you. pleaseee, can we go?" you whine out, tired of sitting in his car that was parked a block away to not let your parents see you two or more specifically rafe. you have been parked here for a while, just listening to rafe go on and on about all the things that could go wrong which was a lot and to be honest, you weren't exactly doubting it but you just wanted to get the possible trauma over with.

"oh yeah, yeah real great advice, genius. i'll just go snort coke in front of them or— or fuckin' i dont know!" he runs his hands down his face, trying to calm down, "alright. y'know what, lets just fuckin' go. i'm sick of this already."

────────*𑁍༘⋆ ────────

"so rafe." rafe's head snaps up at the sound of your dad's voice, the dinner table so silent until now as you awkwardly pick at your food, your parents didn't seem too impressed about the boy. "no college?" you almost groan aloud at the question cause of course.

"oh. uh. no, no, not currently sir." rafe shakes his head with his lips pressed together, you don't remember the last time you saw rafe actually take a bite instead of playing with his food. your eyes glance at your dad who just nods before taking a bite of his food, elbows on the table as he folds his hands together, giving rafe a certain stare while your boyfriend continues. "yeah uh, i've got my dad's business in store so."

“heard what happened, my condolences, real unfortunate.” you bite your lip as you watch the whole interaction, looking at the clock on the wall and just hoping that the time was gonna speed up somehow. “yeah, yeah.. real unfortunate.” rafe replies dryly meanwhile you think it would be great if a car just ran into your house right now.

“you’re young to be running a business on your own, you sure you don’t got someone else to run it?” this makes rafe’s eyebrow twitch because that’s his business, no one else’s. you close your eyes like you were saying a prayer before your hand slips underneath the table to squeeze rafe’s hand like please don’t freak out right now. “no? i think i’m perfectly capable, sir. why you— you don’t think i can do it?” his craziness was slipping and so were you, wanting nothing more to melt into the chair with the tension in the air.

your mom just silently judges rafe, not saying anything. i mean, at least she’s okay with it but only because he's a cameron, a win is a win i guess. you clear your throat before your dad even thinks about replying because you really did not want this to escalate but your dad talks anyways. “of course not, just looking out for you. i guess i shouldn’t right? it’s not like i have to worry about my daughter being taken care of in the future since this won’t be lasting any longer.”

hold up, excuse me? your head snaps in your dad’s direction, eyebrows furrowed because you did not like what he was implying right now, “what do you mean by that, dad?”

you’re met with a scoff from your dad as he placed his fork down, “you don’t seriously think this little thing is gonna last right? it’s just something you’ll grow out of!” now this has got you fucked up because you tilt your head at him like he was talking nonsense and he was.

rafe quickly interjects, “yeah, this was a very nice dinner. you don’t gotta worry about us, uh..” rafe lets out a sniff before smirking, “i’ll see you at the next one, yeah? i’ll take very good care of your daughter— gonna look real nice next time when she’s pregnant.”

────────*𑁍༘⋆ ────────

the next few minutes were a blur, all you remember is your dad yelling at rafe for his words and your mom looking horrified before rafe dragged you away. you don’t know how you’re gonna face your parents next time you see them but you know you’ll look nice with a pregnant belly. after all, rafe always keeps his promises. maybe your kids will look so cute that your parents will boil over.

but rafe was pissed and you of course had to help him let out his anger. “fuck— that’s good, baby. look at you, your dad’s gonna have a stroke if he ever saw this.” he chuckles as his hand pushes your head farther down his dick making you gag. you pull him out with a pop, letting your drool slobber all over his cock as you stroke it, you glare at him with your eyebrows furrowed. “rafe, don’t bring up my dad while i’m doing this. that’s gross.” you whine at him while rafe just rolls his eyes and grips your hair in a nice ponytail, shoving your hand off before forcing you back down onto his dick. “yeah, yeah, shut up and keep taking it down that throat. gotta let him know what a good cocksucker his daughter is next time.” a groan slips past his lips as his head tilts back against the headrest, guiding your head up and down with his hand.

your hand slides over to his balls, massaging it in a way that makes rafe close his eyes and grunt loudly. the reaction causing you to fight off a grin. you look up at him with glossy eyes, the car carpet’s not too pleasant on your knees, rafe can’t help but fuck your throat harder when he sees how helpless you look. his balls hitting your chin over and over while his dick hits the back of your throat causing a burning sensation that almost makes you choke. your nails dig into his thigh as rafe’s arms flex to help guide your head to meet halfway with his hips.

he’s so close but instead of giving you a taste, he pulls your head back up with a grunt. “alright, get up. now, c’mon.” rafe orders you, reaching over you to knead your plump cheeks before slapping it. “can’t waste this load here, need it in that pretty cunt. gonna do exactly what i promised at that dinner. you remember what i said, baby, huh? repeat it for me.” he says as you scramble onto his lap, positioning your entrance over his leaking tip as rafe holds his shaft for you.

“gonna make me a mommy.” you flutter your eyelashes at him, slowly pushing yourself down, your tight walls wrapping around him and molding to the shape of his dick. rafe’s hands instantly grab onto the plush of your ass once you get one or two bounces in, hips thrusting into you from underneath even though you haven’t even adjusted yet. he’s always too impatient when he’s got a plan in mind, “that’s fuckin’ right, good girl. my girl.”

you can already imagine how the second dinner went.

[intimacyequalsdeath]

Bubz's Slasher Fictober Apple Crumble NSFW Alphabets Day 21: Billy Lenz

Day 21! Welcome to the final day of the third week of Fictober! Thus that means we will be winding down the NSFW alphabets shortly but we still have one more week of Fictober goodies to come!. I do also plan to do more NSFW alphabets in the future including in the fun things I have planned for November and December <3

Notes: Minors DNI, Smut, NSFW

A is for Aftercare (What they're like after sex):

Not gonna happen, sorry but it's the truth. If anything your going have to be the one who takes care of Billy afterwards if he even sticks around. Though most times he ends up just going back into the attic.

B is for Body Part (Favorite on them and their partner):

On him he likes his hands, he likes how good he makes you and himself feel with them. Though that's about it, Billy has never really thought of his own self long enough to have a "Favorite part"

On you though he likes just about everything. If he had to pick he'd probably choose your ass or your thighs for obviously sexual reasons. Though like I said he really likes everything.

C is for Cum (Anything to do with cum):

Everywhere, literally everywhere, and if you try to tell him otherwise he's not going to listen to you. So be ready for there to always be a mess. The messier the better in Billy's opinion.

D is for Dirty Secret:

Billy is really just one big dirty secret and whether you actually know about his secrets or not is questionable but as long as he thinks you don't know that's fine with him. He does everything from stealing your underwear to watching you shower.

E is for Experience (How experienced are they?):

If creeping on sorority girls while they had their boyfriends over counts then sure, but if not then Billy is the most inexperienced person on the planet when it comes to actual sex. Don't let all his dirty talk fool you, Billy is all bark no bite.

F is for Favorite Position:

He likes cowgirl and reverse cowgirl the best. Mainly because he can just lay there and not do having and have you do all the work for him.

G is for Goofy (How serious are they?):

I don't think Billy is capable of taking anything seriously. Like anything at all really. So expect him to be cackling and talking your ear off pretty much the entire time.

H is for Hair (How well groomed are they?):

Contrary to popular belief and the fact he lives in an attic I do think Billy keeps himself at least slight groomed. He's not the best at it but he doesn't let himself get unruly.

I is for Intimacy (How are they during the act, romantic etc):

This is something I feel like could be up in the air. Like Billy is capable of being at least a little romantic but whether you see romantic Billy or not is up in the air. It depends on his mood and a lot of other factors including if baby Billy wants to throw a fit or not.

J is for Jackoff (Do they masturbate and how often?):

Very often, like almost everyday whether he has you nearby or not. It's almost his favorite thing in the world besides you... and well being a creepy peeping tom murderer, but who's counting.

K is for Kink (Their kinks):

Mommy or Daddy Kink

He has a major choking kink. You'll sometimes have to pry him off if he ever gets a little too into it, but he would never actually hurt you too terribly bad.

Knife play is real big for Billy too. Another instance where he may get too into it but again he would never cause major injury to you.

L is for Location (Favorite places to have sex):

In your bed pretty much always. He likes in the attic for god sake it's not like he ever leaves the house to begin with. Sometimes he might take up a couch or floor somewhere if you can't make it to the bed but he's mostly a classic bed kinda guy.

M is for Motivation (What turns them on?):

If you catch him right after a kill that's when he's most ready to go. He's still got all his adrenaline pumping and also make sure to show up in a slutty outfit. Something about seeing you in barely there clothes drives Billy up the wall.

N is for No (Something they won't do):

There isn't a lot that he wouldn't do, like I said he never wants to cause you any actual severe injuries but they do happen. It's basic as fuck but a big no for him would be anything you wanted to do that involved leaving the house. If you have to leave the house he isn't interested.

O is for Oral (Oral Preferences):

Billy loves to give, like LOVES it. He lives for giving you pleasure and making you happy. He likes to receive too but nearly as much as he likes to give.

P is for Pace (How fast or slow? Are they rough?):

It's a spectrum for Billy. He can go at literally any speed at all depending on his mood. Sleepy slow morning sex to fast hard rough sex after he's killed somebody.

Q is for Quickie ( Do they like quickies?):

Half your sexual encounters with Billy are quickies. Billy loves them, he'll tackle you onto your bed and you won't be able to get him off of you until the both of you have finished about three times each.

R is for Risk (Are they down to experiment?):

Billy is totally down, bring up whatever you want to him and he's entirely down to try it. Bonus points if he ends up hardcore liking it.

S if for Stamina (How long can they go for?):

Billy's good for a few hours, he gets tired and cranky after a while but when he's got full stamina he can go like a rabbit.

T is for Toys (Do they use toys and do they like them?):

Another thing he's entirely down for. I don't think he would use them on himself as much as he would like teasing you with them. Another thing were he loves seeing you writhe with pleasure.

U if for Unfair (Do they like to tease?):

Billy can get mean, especially with his words, but he never ends up teasing you long as it always ends up backfiring and ends with him working himself up and giving you both what you want.

V is for Volume (How loud can they get?):

Billy is loud as hell, he moans, groans sometimes even yells. Hope and pray you don't have any roommates or Billy won't be a secret for long.

W is for Wild Card (Random things):

Billy may not be one for aftercare but you'll get him to stay around longer if you pull his head to your chest and hold him. Billy loves to be held especially by you.

X is for X-Ray (What are they packing):

A good 5 or 6 inches, though he's really skinny without much girth. There's also a curve towards the end of that makes him appear bigger then he actually is.

Y is for Yearning (How high is their sex drive?):

Extremely high though if it's obvious your not in the mood he'll backoff and go jerkoff somewhere.

Z is for ZZZ (How fast do they fall asleep?):

Billy like never sleep really. He's bouncing off the walls pretty much 24/7. So he might leave after you guys are done but sleeping is the last thing on his mind.

[eds6ngel]

heyy can i ask for steve trying to teach reader to drive and he just gets turned on by her driving his car and yea.... :)

have a good day!

ignore my knowledge of driving, i have not learnt how to drive, and do not plan on doing so in the near future. but, yeah... driving is hot. period. so i get this. i get him. he's a valid boy.

warnings: 18+. smut. afab!reader. established relationship. steve gets hard when r drives. mention of masturbation. mention of oral (m receiving.) fingering. mostly alluding to sex rather than anything hardcore [0.5k].

Steve tried his best to focus, to give you the tips and tricks to become the best driver possible, but there was something so incredibly hot about you in the driver’s seat.

During your relationship, you were not shy of letting your boyfriend know of how much seeing him drive turned you on, and although Steve took that with great pride, he was always confused as to what was so fascinating to illicit your body into a state of horniness.

But, seeing your hand tightly grip the joystick, the other wrapped around the leather steering wheel, rubbing it with your thumb aimlessly as your face scrunched up in concentration, travelling carefully around the parking lot, everything sunk into place.

He shifted in his seat, trying to calm down the obvious hard-on that had developed underneath the denim of his jeans, you sweetly asking him, “Am I doing good, baby?”

He stumbles over his words, no position in his seat allowing for his cock not to be straining against the tightness of his clothing, “Um— Yeah, honey. Just… Just great.”

“You doing okay, babe?” you check in on him, Steve forcing a smile on his face as your eyes remain fixed on the road. “Yeah, um.. Yeah, just fine.”

He was debating on asking you to park up, run to the bathroom inside the grocery store and jerk one out, but the moment your right hand moved back to the steering wheel, squeezing it as you graciously moved around the corner, he couldn’t handle it anymore. Thank God it was early in the morning.

“Baby, I’m going to need you to stop, please.”

The sound from his mouth came out in a hiss, you worried for his safety as you cautiously drove in a straight line towards the nearest parking spot. Putting the car in park, you turn the keys, switching the engine off as you focus your gaze upon your boyfriend.

“Baby, is something—” However, before you can let any words escape your throat, a tongue is slipped into it, a squeak being let out at the forcefulness. You instantly kiss back, melting into him as he cups your face, scrunching the ends of your hair up.

Pulling away breathless, he pants, “I get it.”

“Get what, honey?”

“The whole driving thing. Fuck, you look so hot doing it,” he breathes out, attaching his lips to your neck, carefully biting and sucking at the skin.

Gasping in a breath as he nips at your pulse point, you feel his right hand travelling south, “Told you it was fucking hot.”

“Yeah,” he replies in between kisses, “And now, I think after how many times you’ve blown me in here, it’s only fair that I return the favour. How’s that sound, sweet girl?”

You nod quickly, “Yeah, s-sounds great.”

You can feel his finger slipping underneath the white lace of your panties, ultimately knowing the end fate to his forthcoming action. He pushes one in, curling it in a way he knew would cause you to whine out, “Good girl. It’s a good job no one else is here this early, huh?”

You sigh out in pleasure, Steve leaning in and whispering into your ear, “Because I’m about to make you scream this whole damn parking lot down.”

taglist: @cosmorant @tlclick73 @steveshairspray

steve masterlist.

[jazeswhbhaven]

Just Another Day in Hades...(Requiem of the Survivors Event React III)

Henlo again, third post time! Make sure you check out the previous parts before continuing! ->Part 1 -> ->Part 2->

Good to go? Let's finish this~

So we're back and this is final part to my react post!! It's mostly the damn image limit that kills me. Let me have 50 images per post ugh. Anywayssss

WOMP I spelt his name wrong in another post like all the way wrong. It's bad enough Orias couldn't even remember his name lmao

I'm crying because level with me... I read his name because of the typo as "Zaddy" instead of Zadkie Sure. I mean I'll call him Zaddy ᕕ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡° )ᕗ (btw this is a different way of calling someone "Daddy" during sex) Now you know your admin was being horny for another angel again. I am never leaving the streets at this point and Dre has his eyes on me ready to have some words. m o v i n g o n n nn

So Orias is hyping up the angel trying to get him ready for when leviathan gets over to him. they see him from afar and have their little talk, and Zadkiel is nervous asf (as he should be) but Orias is like "you're fine :D" all while he's over there slobbering over Levi's soul again.

See. Look at him. Just confident. Also this part I'm just gonna hurry up and paraphrase so "Levi" walks up to Orias and the angel and after the two of them stare at each other BAM Orias tells the angels to attack "Levi" immediately.

Looks like they got him right???

W R O N G

After Orias ripped through "Levi's" chest and ate the orb, it didn't taste at all what he expected, and...it had the opposite affect of what he thought it would too.

Won't you look at that, Orias wasn't the only one who fucking came in with a failsafe key sort of speak. SO remember back when I said Zadkiel was staring at Levi??? Well he knew who it was because it wasn't really Levi at all but an old colleague of his named Ose that was disguised by the real Levi who only half trusted Orias's note. And as I suspected, Levi was too smart for that and if we remember that he and orias are the ones that can lie. so both parties threw everyone for a loop.

Leviathan played his cards right and he won. Foras witnessed such a thing before his eyes knowing he was probs gonna win anyway lol

And omfg how cheeky, Levi also just wanted to know what would happen if Orias swallowed the soul omg. Lol this is wild. So in short honestly, Zadkiel gave up, seems that he was under Gabriel since he said his name as his last words and the Leviathan monster pretty much swallowed everyone up. It nearly goes for Orias but Levi stops it.

Yes, even after all this bullshit, Levi sticks to his original promise that he wasn't going to do anything to Orias. In fact, he even has the monster spit out a few souls for Orias to eat.

Now see here, this whole "omg being over 21 means your so old now wow" joke is tiring because no one in their 20s looks like Orias who I assume looks like a wrinkled fucking peach under there and his hair is kinda greyed out too? which I mean I've heard of that happening but come on. lol

otherwise though it comes to a conclusion that Orias was pissed off that he was tricked even though he's the one that tricked Levi in the first place

I can't either Foras. I really can't. Orias needs the timeout chair if he's gonna act like this because omg it's almost like Levi is gentle parenting him so he can act better but I mean technically none of this is a good example of gentle parenting lol But also, Orias has a new noose on his neck and if I'm reading the room correctly, I think Levi intends on using it in it future because of how he says "your life belongs to me" and that it's not like the old one.

Orias is on a tight leash now, Levi's promise still hasn't changed, and our nobles learned more about him and us too.

CONCLUSION So for this event I give it a 9/10. One point off because Orias is being a little brat which kinda came off to me as in his big age, he was still acting like a child. Like yes, give him some grace because he was at that farm with Levi and had horrible stuff done to him and especially one that causes aging to where he may even die in another year or so and he's addicted to angel souls now and it makes him want more and more. I'm pretty sure I'm forgetting to highlight something...but I'mma be honest I'm running off fumes and I haven't slept at all SO if I do remember I'll just edit it in here. But but I hope you all enjoyed the heavy lore again, I really appreciate this that they're doing for the story because it's starting to kind of align with the main story kindish? And we get to see glimpses of how the devils are without MC around so I'm getting my piece of slice of life demon pie.

NOW though with the event done. I'm sure the next one crossing my fingers will be a Lucifer-centered one. maybe. Because they have told us before chapter updates would be every three months or so so that's a lot of waiting that I'm glad for because that means more time to beef up cards, unlock holy board stories, farm for materials. The best time for a f2p peep. btw these advanced candies are gonna fucking be the end of me, it's almost like I need to ONLY nab those during events because they get you at the end with those.

As always appreciate you all for reading my stuff, after I sleep today I'll get back to work on those requests again T^T byeee~ -your lovely admin ♥( ˆ⌣ ˆԅ)

[kingofbodyrolls]

Friendcation (m) | myg | six

← previous | s.masterlist | m.masterlist | next →

Summary: Your vacation is coming to an end but your thoughts are spiraling and filled with anxiety as a tiny mishap makes you question your future with Yoongi.

Pairing: Yoongi x reader (female)

Other characters: Jimin, Jungkook, Taehyung, Namjoon, Hoseok and Seokjin.

Genre/AU: best friends to friends with benefits to lovers, non idol!au, camping!au, roadtrip!au, mechanic!Yoongi, humor, slight angst, smut and fluff

Rating: mature/explicit/R18  (This is mature/explicit content, so minors, please do not interact.)

Disclaimer: I do not own BTS or know them personally and this work of fiction is purely fictional and for entertainment purposes only. The actions and personalities described in the story do not reflect those of BTS— it’s just fiction. Also, if you would kindly read the tags/warnings before reading, that would be lovely: and if you don’t like whatever is described in the tags, just hit return and find something else to read. Thank you 🌸

Status: completed!

Word Count: 11.3K

Warnings (general): angst, anxiety, talk about feelings and future, teasing friends and mention of pregnancy. Warnings (explicit): explicit sex, exhibitionism, voyeurism, protected sex, oral (female and male receiving), dirty talk, nipple/breast play, ass slapping, hair pulling.

Author’s note(1): Wow, these last weeks have been hard on me to be honest. For a moment I really struggled with dwindling engagement for the series, and it honestly made me want to quit the whole thing and not finish it… I had to realize who I write for (I concluded it’s for me) and whatever I receive is just a really nice bonus 🫰I felt like the decline in engagement meant you didn’t like the series (which is fine if you feel that way), but it hit me hard. I understand a part of it can be the recent long chapters (I’m truly sorry and I’ll be better at keeping it at 10K for a smoother reading experience in the future). I have so many stories in my head that I just want to put to paper, so I’m going to keep doing that. I think I’ll keep posting whatever new stuff I write in the future, because I think it’d just be a waste to have a full fanfiction parking in my Drive. 

I tried to pour my heart into the last chapters, and I’m really proud of it. To be honest, it’s mostly smut (and sexual teasing) – because well 🤷 

I really hope you enjoy this chapter (and the final one). Love you 💜

Taglist: @idkjustlovingbts, @constancelayon, @wobblewobble822, @ktownshizzle, @moonchild1, @ultimatefangirl0, @baechugff, @jimintaemin, @parapiop7, @fckkntired, @iluvfndms, @citypop-princess, @tarahardcore, @bergandysam, @massivelyfullenthusiast, @tatyhend, @gimeow *strikethrough means tumblr isn’t letting me tag you :( **you can still be added to the taglist, just drop a comment here, on any chapter or the masterlist and I’ll add you 🌸

It’s been cross posted to AO3 if you prefer to read there.

These past couple of days have left you with a strange, unsettling feeling. 

It’s not just the relentless banter from your friends, teasing you about what they term as ‘sickening love and adoration’ between you and Yoongi. 

No, there’s something more, something that eludes definition but refuses to be ignored. 

As your friends continue to jest and joke about your relationship, a knot of unease tightens in your stomach. It’s not a matter of their words bothering you; rather, it’s a lingering doubt, an unspoken concern that seems to dance at the edges of your consciousness. 

Your mind is filled with tension, and you can’t shake the feeling that something isn’t right.

It took an unusually long time for the realization to sink in – the absence of your period. 

How could you have missed something so significant? 

Perhaps it was the whirlwind of fun and excitement, the joyous moments shared with Yoongi and your friends, that allowed this crucial detail to slip through the cracks of your awareness. 

As the truth settles over you like a sudden storm, a wave of introspection crashes upon your thoughts. Why had you not noticed sooner? 

A sinking feeling settles in the pit of your stomach as you meticulously do the math, tracing back to that one moment you and Yoongi had sex without protection in the forest. 

The pieces fall into place, forming a picture of uncertainty that leaves you standing at the crossroads of emotions. 

Regret, fear, and maybe a hint of excitement swirl in a tempest within your mind. The weight of the realization becomes a stormy sea, tossing your emotions like relentless waves. You grapple with conflicting feelings, torn between the potential of new beginnings and the fear of the unknown. 

For years, you made a conscious choice to steer clear of hormonal contraception. 

The decision wasn’t made lightly; it was a journey of self-discovery and resilience against the societal norms that often dictate women’s reproductive choices. You recall the moments when hormonal contraception wreaked havoc on your body, the side effects casting shadows on your overall well-being. 

It was then that you decided it wasn’t the path for you. The journey to this decision was marked by personal reflection, moments of doubt, and a fierce determination to take control of your reproductive health. Condoms became your chosen method of both contraception and protection. The decision was not just a practical one but a statement of agency over your own body.

Sure, you’re a grown woman, and you should have been more cautious. 

The irony isn’t lost on you; after all, it only takes a few determined swimmers to set the wheels in motion for a baby. 

The realization brings a mix of emotions — surprise, anxiety, and a touch of disbelief. You can’t help but question your own judgment.

As the weight of the situation settles in, you find solace in the fact that it’s with Yoongi, a man you not only adore but love (even though you haven’t spoken those words to him yet). 

The history you share, the years of friendship and the open conversation about future possibilities soften the unexpected blow. He’s expressed openness to the idea of children down the line, creating a glimmer of hope in the midst of uncertainty.

As the revelation sinks in, your mind becomes a battlefield of conflicting emotions. 

The foremost among them is the relentless uncertainty that echoes through every corner of your thoughts. 

Did Yoongi genuinely mean what he said about wanting kids, or were those words spoken in the heat of the moment? The weight of the questions threatens to drown you, leaving you grappling with the unknown.

In the tumultuous sea of your mind, the uncertainty stands out as the dominant wave. You find yourself questioning the timing— is it too early in your relationship to venture into such uncharted territory? 

The prospect of an impending headache looms, a physical manifestation of the mental strain that accompanies the myriad thoughts swirling within your head. The room feels suddenly smaller as you navigate through the maze of emotions. 

Each question begets another, creating a web of doubts that threaten to entangle your sense of clarity.

Who knew a tiny stick could unleash a whirlwind of chaos in your mind? 

You can practically feel your thoughts spiraling faster than a rollercoaster, and you haven’t even taken a goddamn test yet! It’s like your brain decided to host its own circus without your permission.

The prospect of a simple test morphs into a mental acrobatics show, complete with somersaulting doubts and high-wire uncertainties. You catch yourself mid-thought, berating the overthinking brain of yours— Calm down, it might be nothing, right? 

As you camp in the serene outskirts of Gunsan, surrounded by the symphony of nature—crickets singing their nightly lullaby and the earthy aroma of the rural landscape—you find yourself at the crossroads of revelation. 

The revelation, however, is a delicate secret that you’re hesitant to share, not with your friends and certainly not with Yoongi, at least not until you’re certain. 

A few more days, and you’ll leave for another city, and hopefully you can sneak in a pregnancy test at a store without anyone noticing.

Amidst the bustling thoughts of your mind, your boyfriend’s voice cuts through the noise like a familiar melody. His warm, loving smile, revealing those endearing gums you adore, welcomes you back to the present. 

“Hey, babe, are you coming?” 

His voice, tinged with affection, carries a hint of playfulness. His eyes, like windows to his soul, flicker with concern as he notices a shift in your mood. A subtle furrow in his brow goes unnoticed, replaced by a comforting smile that stretches across his face.

“Yeah,” you nod in response to him. His silhouette is framed in the doorway of Holly, and the tantalizing aroma of barbecue chicken and pork wafts into the air, teasing your senses. 

The savory scent wraps around you, awakening your appetite.

A playful breeze carries the distant sounds of laughter and clinking utensils from the gathering outside. The chatter of friends intermingles with the sizzle of the grill, creating a symphony of anticipation. 

With a soft smile, he holds the door ajar, casting a warm invitation into the confined space. The golden hues of the setting sun paint the scene, casting long shadows that dance on the interior of the van.

“I’ll be right out,” you assure him. 

As you step into the outdoor feast, the savory fragrance intensifies, enveloping you in a culinary embrace.

As the sun begins its descent on your next-to-last day in Gunsan, the air becomes infused with the tantalizing scent of barbecue. Yoongi and Seokjin, the culinary maestros, have orchestrated a feast of flavors, transforming the open fire into a canvas for their culinary artistry.

The crackling flames dance beneath skewers laden with an assortment of barbecue delights – succulent chicken and pork, each morsel dripping with savory juices. The aroma, a symphony of spices and char, teases your senses and ignites a ravenous anticipation within. The sizzle and hiss of meat meeting open flame create a hypnotic melody, luring everyone closer to the culinary spectacle.

As you emerge from the cozy confines of Holly, the brisk evening air kisses your skin, carrying with it the mingling scents of grilled delights and the lively chatter of your friends. The crackling sounds of the open fire draw you closer, promising a reprieve from the whirlwind of thoughts swirling within your mind. 

A sense of gratitude swells within you. God, you love their cooking. It’s more than a meal; it’s a celebration, a manifestation of the bonds that tie you all together. 

You settle into the chair beside Namjoon, the sturdy wood offering a welcome support beneath you. 

A cool beer materializes in your hands, a gesture from Namjoon that elicits a small, appreciative smile. As the effervescent bubbles dance in the amber liquid, you find momentary distraction in the tactile sensation of condensation on the cold bottle.

The ambient hum of conversation surrounds you, friends exchanging anecdotes and laughter. However, their words become distant echoes, mere background noise, as your mind undertakes a journey into the realm of more pressing thoughts. Could you be pregnant?

The crackling of the nearby fire, the occasional gust of wind rustling the leaves, and the laughter of your friends create a symphony of sounds. Yet, within the symphony, your thoughts stand out like a solo, demanding attention.

As you take a sip of the cold beer, you suddenly remember that maybe you shouldn’t and put down the beer as you catch a fleeting glimpse of Yoongi, his eyes meeting yours with an unspoken understanding – does he somehow know?

Namjoon’s voice cuts through the haze of your thoughts, his concern palpable in the furrow of his brow and the gentleness of his inquiry. 

“What’s wrong?” he asks, his words a lifeboat in the sea of your turbulent thoughts. The concern in his eyes is mirrored by the gaze of your friends, a united front of worry that surrounds you.

“I’m fine,” you offer a weak smile, the words slipping from your lips as easily as a silk thread. The campfire’s glow dances in your eyes, casting flickering shadows that betray the turbulence within. 

You catch the subtle exchange of glances among your friends, a silent language they’ve perfected over the years.

Namjoon arches an eyebrow, a silent question lingering in the air. 

Hoseok’s voice breaks through the haze in your mind, and you blink, realizing you’ve been somewhere else entirely. He wears a furrowed brow, a genuine concern etched on his face.

“Did you even hear what we were talking about?” Hoseok’s question hangs in the air, a lifeline thrown to a drifting mind. He glances around at the others, a silent plea for confirmation that you’re still tethered to the conversation.

“I’m sorry,” you admit, a genuine apology tinting your words. You glance around at the concerned faces of your friends, a slight frown forming on Namjoon’s forehead. 

“No, my mind was elsewhere,” you confess, your eyes momentarily dropping to the beer bottle in your hand. A swirl of conflicting emotions dances in your gaze – the weight of unspoken worries, the fear of the unknown, and the delicate balance of a secret you’re not ready to share.

“Something going on?” Seokjin’s question hangs in the air, his eyes reflecting genuine concern. Normally, their fond and caring hearts would be a source of comfort, but at this moment, you wish for solitude. 

The weight of immense turmoil presses against your chest, and you offer a weak smile to mask the turbulence within.

Your heart flutters, caught between the comfort of their understanding and the fortress of secrets you’ve built around yourself. The crackling of the fire seems to intensify, a background chorus to the unspoken truth lingering in the night air.

“No, I’m fine,” you assert, but your attempt at a reassuring smile doesn’t quite reach your eyes. The weight of unspoken thoughts sits heavily on your shoulders. 

“Just tired,” you add, stretching your arms above your head in an attempt to shake off the invisible burden. The forced yawn escapes, a theatrical touch to your performance. 

As you exhale, the weariness is palpable, not just in your body but in the weary creases that temporarily mar your forehead.

You catch Yoongi’s gaze, and for a fleeting moment, his eyes betray a hint of concern. It’s a silent exchange, a language only the two of you understand. 

Worried stares linger for a moment, probing, questioning. You deflect them with a half-hearted smile, a feeble attempt to reassure both yourself and your friends. Thankfully, they relent, returning to their earlier discussion with an air of nonchalance. It’s a welcome diversion, giving you a momentary respite from the mounting unease.

But as your friends immerse themselves in chatter, your attention is captivated by Yoongi. His gaze, softer and more perceptive than the others, lingers on you with an understanding that goes beyond words. In the depths of his eyes, you sense an unspoken connection, a recognition that he, too, perceives the silent storm brewing within you. 

As the aroma of grilled meats fills the air, your thoughts drift away, carried on the scent of uncertainty. The upcoming days loom ahead, casting a shadow on your once carefree demeanor. 

Each passing moment feels like a countdown, the ticking clock resonating with the pounding of your anxious heart. The idea of taking a pregnancy test, a seemingly simple act, now carries the weight of your fate.

A symphony of laughter erupts, a harmonious cacophony that almost mimics a melody. Your gaze sweeps across the group, catching each friend lost in the infectious mirth. Their joy is palpable, manifested in hearty belly laughs and eyes crinkled with delight. 

However, as your eyes dart over to Yoongi, you notice a stark contrast.

His demeanor doesn’t mirror the jovial atmosphere; instead, his expression remains stoic, a subtle tension etched on his features. 

Your gaze flits from one friend to another, their laughter echoing in the warm air. They share an inside joke, a moment of camaraderie that has eluded you. A subtle unease settles in your chest, the feeling of being adrift in a sea of amusement, disconnected.

Caught in the undertow of your own thoughts, you find yourself lost in the laughter, unable to decipher the humor that dances between them. It’s not just a missed punchline; it’s a fleeting moment of connection slipping through your fingers.

Hoseok’s eyes light up like twin stars as he bursts out, “Now, that’s a brilliant idea!” 

His voice, brimming with infectious enthusiasm, resonates through the campsite, attempting to suppress the laughter bubbling just beneath the surface. His shoulders shake slightly with restrained mirth, and a mischievous gleam dances in his eyes, hinting at the amusement he’s struggling to contain.

The air crackles with the energy of the moment, as if Hoseok’s excitement has sparked a lively current that electrifies the entire campfire. The others catch on, their own laughter simmering beneath the surface.

You turn your gaze to Hoseok, brows furrowed in both wonder and confusion. “What’s the brilliant idea?” you ask, your voice tinged with curiosity, as if you’re about to embark on an unexpected adventure. 

Hoseok grins mischievously, his laughter evolving into soft chuckles. “We were thinking of giving you and Yoongi some alone time tomorrow,” he suggests, the glint in his eyes hinting at a secret plan. 

Seokjin smirks, his eyes twinkling with mischief. 

“So you can,” he begins, drawing out the words with a pause for dramatic effect. You roll your eyes at his theatrics, but then he raises his eyebrows suggestively. 

Suddenly, your ears and cheeks flash red as you realize the implication of his words, and the campfire bursts into laughter, leaving you caught in a delightful mix of embarrassment and amusement.

They all burst into laughter, and you catch Yoongi rolling his eyes with a mock sigh. 

You wish the ground would just swallow you up, but you manage a playful glare in his direction. “Thanks for the moral support,” you mutter under your breath, earning a teasing grin from Yoongi, who clearly enjoys the banter as much as the others enjoy the spectacle.

Yoongi nonchalantly shrugs his shoulders, his ‘I-don’t-give-a-fuck’ attitude on full display. You’re well aware he truly doesn’t care about the teasing, but no matter how many times your friends crack jokes about your intimate life, it never gets less awkward. 

You shoot Yoongi a sideways glance, raising an eyebrow. 

“Really? This again?” you quip, a playful smirk tugging at your lips. It’s a game you all play, and deep down, you know it’s all in good fun. Yet, you can’t help but wonder if they’ll ever tire of it.

“You seem like you could use it,” Namjoon adds, his voice laced with concern as he gently nudges your shoulder. 

You’ve buried your face in your hands, hoping the shield of your palms could protect you from the lingering embarrassment. The laughter of your friends echoes around you, but you can’t bring yourself to look up just yet. 

The warmth of Namjoon’s touch seeps through your hands, a comforting gesture amidst the teasing storm. As you finally gather the courage to peek through your fingers, you catch a glimpse of his reassuring smile, a silent understanding passing between friends. It’s moments like these that make you appreciate the bonds you’ve built, even if they come with their fair share of playful ribbing.

“Please don’t say stuff like that.” 

You plead, the cringe evident in your voice as you instinctively recoil. A shiver of discomfort crawls down your spine, and you find yourself desperately wishing for an escape from the awkwardness that lingers in the air. 

The weight of their words presses on you, and you subtly shift, trying to distance yourself from the subject at hand. The vulnerability of the moment tugs at your conscience, leaving you exposed in the face of their laughter.

“With that stunt you pulled at the restaurant, I think you have a lot of pent up sexual frustration.”

Hoseok chuckles, and the teasing tone in his voice causes your cheeks to flush with embarrassment. You shift uncomfortably in your seat, memories of that daring encounter at the restaurant flooding your mind. 

The heat rises in your face as you recall the unexpected aftermath, as you had walked out to the table with Yoongi’s cum on your face, and a wave of self-consciousness washes over you. 

The campfire suddenly feels too warm, and you find yourself desperately wishing to change the subject. Hoseok’s laughter lingers in the air, a constant reminder of that daring escapade, and you try to suppress the vivid images that threaten to resurface.

“And we would rather not be here when you let off some steam,” Seokjin adds, his laughter echoing through the air. You roll your eyes playfully, a mix of amusement and embarrassment coloring your expression.

The teasing banter continues, and you sense the warmth of embarrassment creeping up your neck. 

A fleeting glance at Yoongi reveals his nonchalant demeanor, his composure unbroken. Inspired by his cool attitude, you decide to take a page from his book. With a smirk and a playful glint in your eyes, you raise an eyebrow at your friends, challenging them to bring it on. 

“Thanks,” you say with a mischievous glint in your eyes, looking around your friends. 

“I could definitely use a good fuck and Yoongi’s thick cock just hits all the right spots,” you chuckle, adding a playful wink to your statement. The campfire falls silent and it’s almost deafening. 

“So thank you so much for thinking about my vagina and Yoongi’s dick. It’s really appreciated and we’ll look forward to tomorrow.” You say with a mischievous twinkle in your eye.

As your friends sit in stunned silence, you bask in the unexpected power of your words. 

With a confident grin, you raise your beer and offer a casual shrug. 

“What can I say? You asked for it!” 

Your tone exudes a mix of playful confidence and nonchalance. Meanwhile, Yoongi’s proud gaze intensifies, and you can almost hear him whispering, ‘Well done’ without uttering a word.

As the weight of your words settles in the air, Namjoon breaks the silence with a low whistle. “Well, I guess that’s one way to shut us up,” he chuckles, shaking his head in both disbelief and amusement. 

The group erupts into a mixture of nervous laughter and awkward glances, uncertain of how to respond to your unexpected boldness. You’ve found a bottle of ice cold water and take a sip of it, maintaining your confident demeanor, and exchange a knowing glance with Yoongi, who seems thoroughly entertained by the unfolding scene.

The remainder of the meal unfolds in a symphony of laughter, shared stories, and the clinking of utensils against plates. Conversations shift seamlessly between topics, from future plans to nostalgic memories. The camaraderie of your group takes center stage, overshadowing the earlier teasing. 

Each moment is filled with genuine connection, reminding you of the unique bond you share.

The midday sun casts a warm glow over your lunch with friends, the flickering flames of the campfire dancing in the background. Laughter intertwines with the aroma of yesterday’s leftovers, creating an atmosphere that is both familiar and tinged with anticipation. 

As you savor each bite, you can’t help but feel a subtle tension in the air, a delicate undercurrent that stems from the impending alone time with Yoongi.

Your friends, oblivious to the internal struggle you’re facing, continue to share stories and jokes, but your mind keeps drifting back to the unspoken dilemma that lingers like a shadow. 

The prospect of finally being alone with Yoongi excites you, yet the fear of him unraveling your internal turmoil weighs on you.

The crackling fire mirrors the conflicting emotions within you, casting shadows on the faces of your friends. You steal glances at Yoongi, wondering if he senses your unease.

The sun hangs high in the sky, casting a golden hue over the campsite as your friends bid you farewell after a satisfying lunch. 

There’s a subtle understanding among them, a shared unspoken decision to give you and Yoongi the precious gift of time alone. As they discuss their plans to explore the nearby town, you can’t help but appreciate the warmth of their friendship and the unspoken support they provide.

With cheerful goodbyes, your friends set off, leaving behind a trail of laughter that gradually fades into the distance. 

Now, as the tranquility of the campsite settles around you, there’s a palpable shift in the atmosphere. The rustling leaves and distant chirping of birds create a serene backdrop, underscoring the anticipation of the solitude that awaits you and Yoongi.

Turning towards each other, you and Yoongi share a knowing glance, a silent acknowledgment of the precious moments ahead. 

The air is charged with a mix of excitement and intimacy as you prepare for this secluded interlude, grateful for the thoughtfulness of your friends who understood the significance of this time for you and your boyfriend.

As you and Yoongi cocoon yourselves in the comforting confines of Holly, the air becomes infused with a sense of tranquility. 

The soft glow of his laptop casts a gentle illumination, creating an intimate bubble within the vehicle. The flickering light from the laptop dances across your faces, casting shadows that playfully intertwine with the laughter and stolen glances. 

As Yoongi’s lips graze the delicate expanse of your shoulders, a shiver dances down your spine, eliciting a delicate sigh of contentment. 

His nuzzles become a tender exploration, mapping the contours of familiarity that make your body a cherished landscape for him. The warmth of his touch creates a cocoon, enveloping you in a sanctuary where time seems to linger.

You revel in the softness of the moment, the gentle pressure of Yoongi’s affectionate gestures making you feel cherished and understood. The rhythmic pattern of his nuzzles mirrors the quiet cadence of your breaths, creating a silent language that speaks volumes in the tranquil cocoon you’ve woven together.

Yoongi’s fingers, like skilled maestros, trail a symphony of comfort across your shoulder, their tender dance ascending to the curve of your neck. 

As his touch transforms into a soothing massage, you feel the knots of tension unravel beneath his fingertips. The rhythmic kneading becomes a balm, dissolving the worries that had taken residence in the recesses of your mind.

In the gentle cadence of his strokes, you find a haven where each movement is a whispered assurance, a silent promise that you’re not alone in whatever may be troubling you. 

The warmth of his hands carries an unspoken invitation to share the burdens of your heart, creating a space where vulnerability is embraced. As his fingers work their magic, the stresses of the day seem to dissipate, carried away on the currents of his affectionate touch. 

The sensation is both physical and emotional, a tangible reminder that you have someone by your side who cares deeply for you.

Yoongi’s voice, soft and laced with concern, further reinforces the sanctuary of this moment. 

“What’s wrong, babe?” 

He inquires, his words a lifeline thrown into the sea of your thoughts. The genuine curiosity in his eyes invites you to open up, to let the weight of your troubles be shared and lightened by the strength of your bond.

In the cocoon of Yoongi’s touch, you find solace and a momentary escape from the complexities swirling within. His fingers, tracing soothing patterns on your shoulder, evoke sensations that transcend the physical. 

As you sink deeper into the bliss of his massage, the barriers around your heart momentarily soften, allowing vulnerability to seep through.

“I don’t want to talk about it yet.” You confess, the words slipping from your lips like a whispered secret. The timbre of your voice, tinted with a mixture of fragility and desire, hangs in the air. In this moment, you feel pliable, molded by his care and affection.

With a tenderness that mirrors the flickering warmth of a candle, Yoongi turns your gaze toward his, locking eyes with a sincerity that speaks volumes. His touch is both a reassurance and an unspoken promise, a reminder that within this cocoon of shared vulnerability, there exists a haven for your thoughts and emotions.

“Okay.” He utters, the word carrying the weight of understanding and patience. In the silent exchange of glances, there’s a recognition that time unfolds at its own pace, and the space he provides is a canvas for your unspoken words to manifest.

As he cradles your face in his hands, his touch becomes a conduit for reassurance, a silent pledge that he’ll be there when you decide to unravel the intricacies of your thoughts. 

“I’m here when you’re ready to talk.”

The depth of his gaze invites trust, assuring you that this haven isn’t bound by a ticking clock or the urgency of spoken words.

In the quiet cocoon of Holly, gratitude for Yoongi blooms within you like a delicate flower. His intuitive understanding, the way he navigates the uncharted waters of your emotions, is a testament to the depth of his love. It’s more than just appreciation; it’s a profound acknowledgment of the bond you share.

As you rest against him, the subtle rise and fall of his chest a comforting rhythm, the weight of your feelings finds solace. His ability to read the unspoken nuances, to dance with the ebb and flow of your emotions, is a symphony of understanding. 

It’s not just about giving you space; it’s about crafting a sanctuary where vulnerability is met with patience, and time is a gentle companion.

In these moments, the love you harbor for him swells, an ocean of emotions that transcends the need for words. His presence becomes a balm, soothing the edges of uncertainty, and you find yourself enveloped in a warmth that extends beyond the physical.

You revel in the simplicity of his knowing glances and the way he respects the sacredness of your thoughts. It’s the silent assurance that he’ll stand by you, unmoved by the passing seconds, until you’re ready to unfurl the chapters of your heart.

“I can help you take your mind off whatever’s troubling you?”

His lips linger on yours, leaving the taste of warmth and affection as a gentle reminder that in his embrace, solace awaits. The simplicity of his offer carries a wealth of unspoken understanding, a silent promise to be your anchor in the sea of uncertainties.

As he speaks those words, his eyes, windows to a soul that intimately knows yours, search for a sign in the language only you two share. 

There’s an invitation in the way he holds you, an unspoken pledge to share the weight of your troubles.

Perhaps, in the sanctuary of each other’s presence, you can find respite from the storm brewing within. His touch, a soothing melody, offers an escape into a realm where words are unnecessary, where the language of love becomes a salve for the wounds of the heart.

You consider his offer, the genuine concern etched on his face, and for a moment, you allow yourself to be carried away by the prospect of a temporary reprieve. 

The weight of his desire reflects in the shadowed depth of his gaze, a silent confession that transcends words. His eyes, normally a window to his soul, now betray the subtle dance of passion and want. As you lock eyes with him, you find yourself ensnared in the magnetic pull of his longing, a current that sparks anticipation.

The soft droop of his eyelids harbors a secret world, one where desire takes the lead and whispers promises only lovers understand. There’s a languid rhythm to the way his gaze caresses, each blink a heartbeat echoing the pulse of the moment.

In the subdued light, the flames of passion flicker within those dark orbs, leaving an indelible impression of the fire that smolders beneath the surface. You feel the intensity of his silent plea, a plea that beckons you to acknowledge the uncharted territory where your desires intertwine.

“I wouldn’t say no to that.”

A playful chuckle escapes your lips, a mischievous melody that dances in the air, echoing the lighthearted rhythm of your connection. 

As you lean in, your teeth graze the edge of his bottom lip, not just in a tease, but in a silent declaration of your shared desire. The playful nip is a prelude to the symphony of sensations waiting to unfold.

His responding grunt is a low, primal note, a testament to the delicious tension building between you.

As you pull away, a knowing glint in your eyes, you leave behind a promise lingering in the air—a promise of the unrestrained passion that simmers just beneath the surface, waiting to be set free. 

“Then lay down and let me make you forget your own name.”

A surge of anticipation electrifies the air as his words wrap around you, a sultry promise that sends shivers down your spine. The confidence in his voice resonates, a magnetic force pulling you deeper into the allure of the moment. You surrender to the rhythm of his suggestion, feeling the weight of the world lifting as he guides you gently to recline.

His eyes, dark pools of anticipation, reflect a hunger that transcends the constraints of time. There’s a deliberate slowness to his movements, a silent vow to savor every nuance of pleasure that unfolds between you.

As he expertly slides down your sweatpants (you did not steal those from Yoongi, you swear!) he unveils your desire-laden form, leaving you in nothing but your panties. The room seems to hum with a charged energy as his eyes meet yours, the spark of lust reflected in that magnetic gaze. 

Your longing gaze locks onto him, capturing the fiery essence of your arousal. His long, ebony locks frame his handsome face.

“You know you’re so damn beautiful, right?” 

He murmurs, his fingers orchestrating a slow, tantalizing symphony as they traverse the path from your toes, ascending with deliberate grace up the landscape of your legs. Each stroke is a promise, a prelude that sends a shiver of anticipation racing through your veins, your skin awakening with goosebumps.

The sensation is electric, every inch of your skin tingling with anticipation. The journey of his touch creates a symphony of shivers that dance in harmonious tandem with your rising desire. 

Your cheeks flush with a rosy hue as his gaze lingers on your legs. Feeling a twinge of self-consciousness, you stammer, “Um, don’t pay too much attention to my legs. I haven’t shaved recently,” your words escape in a hushed admission, and you instinctively attempt to shield your face from his gaze.

His fingers delicately peel away the protective shield you’ve built with your hands, revealing your blushing cheeks and the vulnerability that lingers in your eyes. 

A soft hiss escapes his lips, and his gaze intensifies with a fiery determination. “I don’t care,” he declares, his voice a low, husky murmur that hangs in the air, “every inch of you is beautiful.”

He gently tilts your chin up, meeting your eyes with an affectionate gaze. He reassures you, his fingers tracing a delicate path along your jawline, his touch a comforting affirmation that transcends the superficial. 

There’s an intensity in his words, a raw honesty that sends shivers down your spine. 

A soft moan escapes your lips in response to his words, the praise sinking into the depths of your being. Your breath quickens, and a tingling warmth begins to pool between your thighs, a visceral reaction to the arousal ignited by his intimate acknowledgment. 

The air around you thickens with anticipation, and you can feel the subtle friction as your panties cling to your skin, a tactile reminder of the desire that courses through your veins.

His hands, like gentle phantoms, trace tantalizing patterns over the fabric covering your core. The teasing caresses send shivers down your spine, creating an electric dance of anticipation on your skin. 

As his fingers weave through the unseen pathways, you find yourself instinctively arching your back, a silent plea for more, a desire that threads through the very fibers of your being.

Each feather-light stroke becomes a whisper of promises, a seductive invitation that beckons you to surrender to the impending ecstasy. The subtle friction against your clothed core intensifies the yearning, creating a magnetic pull that draws you closer to the edge of desire.

The anticipation in the room crescendos as Yoongi, his eyes heavy with desire, firmly grips the edge of your panties. 

A subtle yet deliberate tug sends a thrill through your body, and you instinctively arch your back, offering yourself to him in a silent dance of longing. Your ass lifts in a graceful surrender, a gesture that speaks volumes without the need for words, inviting him to unveil the secrets hidden beneath the fabric.

He slowly peels your panties down your legs, each inch of exposed skin kindling the flames of desire. His unhurried touch is both a torment and a pleasure, awakening a craving within you that only he can satisfy. 

The fabric trails over your thighs, leaving a tingling sensation in its wake. As your panties reach your ankles, you find yourself teetering on the edge of vulnerability and excitement, the cool air of the room caressing the newly exposed skin.

The pace is torturous, yet the sweet torment only adds to the fervor of your need for him. Your breath catches, and your heart pounds in rhythm with the silent crescendo of desire, as he takes his time, savoring every moment of the seduction.

Yoongi’s lips descend with a feather-light touch, igniting a cascade of sensations that ripple through your core. The warmth of his breath, coupled with the gentle press of his lips against your clit, creates an electrifying dance between pleasure and anticipation.

“Already so damn wet for me.”

His words, a whispered declaration against your skin, send a jolt of desire straight through you. The tenderness in his kiss contrasts with the building heat, a delicious paradox that has your body responding eagerly to his every move. Your body aches for the touch of his hands, for the intimacy that promises to follow his seductive declaration.

As he explores the delicate contours of your pussy, his hands expertly coax your legs apart, allowing for an unhindered journey into the realms of ecstasy.

The velvety caress of his tongue on your most sensitive spot sends shockwaves of pleasure cascading through you. Your body, a canvas for his artistry, responds with an involuntary moan, a testament to the electric connection forged between you. 

Each languid stroke, each artful flick, becomes a brushstroke painting a masterpiece of desire.

With an artful blend of tenderness and hunger, he delves into the intimate landscape, leaving no territory uncharted. The sight of him, a devoted architect of pleasure, navigating the peaks and valleys of your pussy, etches a sinful image in your memory, a visual symphony that resonates with the raw, primal energy between you.

His exploration is thorough, a sacred pilgrimage that transforms your most intimate sanctuaries into altars of pleasure. 

As his tongue dances with purpose, each exquisite movement sends ripples of pleasure through your body, eliciting gasps and moans that punctuate the charged air.

Your fingers entwine in the velvety strands of his midnight-black hair, a tactile dance that blurs the lines between pain and pleasure. The sensation of your grip sends a seismic shiver through him, a tangible expression of the fusion between your desire and his arousal. 

His groan, a harmonious blend of both agony and ecstasy, resonates in the intimate space between you. 

His adept tongue orchestrates a tantalizing symphony, each rhythmic stroke sending waves of pleasure through your core. The artful dance of his lips and tongue creates a crescendo of desire, a masterful performance that leaves you gasping for breath.

As he delves deeper into the artistry of your desire, his movements evoke the most primal and exquisite sounds — a melodic fusion of slurping and sighs that harmonize with the symphony of your escalating pleasure. 

In the languid exploration of your body, his tender touch becomes a testament to the depth of his affection. Each deliberate caress is a celebration of intimacy, as if he’s unraveling the layers of your being to expose the essence of your bond. 

The unhurried pace of his movements whispers of a profound appreciation for the canvas of your skin, savoring every nuance as if committing the map of your body to memory.

The love you feel for him, and the love he showers upon you, intertwine like vines, creating a tapestry of shared passion that envelops both of you in its rich, intricate patterns.

As you lie there, engulfed in the warmth of his adoration, an unexpected realization strikes you — he possesses the qualities of an extraordinary lover and, perhaps, an incredible father. 

Your mind, caught in the whirlwind of emotions, begins to spiral. It’s not a descent into chaos; rather, it’s an ascent into your possible future. The thought flickers through your mind like a gentle flame, casting a soft glow on the image of your shared moments. How loving he would be towards a child, how amazing he would be. You can feel the telltale signs of anxiousness slowly seeping into your body.

In this moment, you can’t help but acknowledge the depth of your feelings for him. Damn, you love him so much.

As Yoongi tenderly explores the landscape of your pussy, your mind, like an unwelcome guest, insists on revisiting the uncertainties that have been haunting you. The touch that should be a remedy becomes a battleground between the present moment and the lingering worries that threaten to steal your focus.

In this emotional tug-of-war, you find yourself caught between the desire to surrender to the sensations and the compulsion to confront the uncertainties head-on. 

As Yoongi’s skilled touch ventures into your warm walls, your senses respond with an electrifying awareness. The moment he slips a finger inside, a surge of pleasure cascades through you, momentarily eclipsing the persistent thoughts that have plagued your mind. 

The explicit bond between you and Yoongi becomes a lifeline, grounding you in the immediate sensations that demand your attention.

“Ah, fuck,” you moan, wanting more of his electrifying touch.

In a slow and deliberate rhythm, Yoongi withdraws his finger, creating an exquisite tension that leaves you yearning for more. The anticipation builds as he re-enters, his finger becoming a conduit for both pleasure and promise. 

With every measured thrust, the world around you blurs, and the only reality is the electrifying connection between you and him.

As his finger dances within you, the dual sensation of his intimate exploration and the tantalizing strokes on your clit forms a harmonious symphony of ecstasy. It’s a delicate balance between sweet torture and the promise of release, a dance that makes you teeter on the edge of losing yourself entirely.

Your mind, once clouded with uncertainty, now revels in the intoxicating sensations he elicits. 

Each stroke of his finger becomes a stroke of liberation, freeing you from the shackles of doubt and leading you into a realm where pleasure reigns supreme.

As he introduces a second finger into the dance of pleasure, a new dimension of sensation unfolds. The subtle stretch sends tendrils of pleasure through you, and you find yourself instinctively meeting his every thrust. 

His fingers, now working in tandem, navigate the depths of your pussy with an intimate familiarity. Each calculated movement is a testament to his skill, an artful exploration of your most sensitive realms. 

As he delves deeper, you can’t help but surrender to the crescendo of pleasure building within you. The hunger for more intensifies, an insatiable craving that propels you both into uncharted territory.

The precipice of pleasure looms ever nearer, a tantalizing edge that threatens to consume you entirely. Every caress, every thrust brings you to the brink, and the intensity becomes almost overwhelming. The electric current of desire courses through your veins, a pulsating reminder of the ecstasy that hangs in the air.

Your breaths come in shallow gasps, mirroring the urgency of your body’s response to the impending release. 

“Yoon, I’m so close!” 

The words escape your lips in breathless pants, carried on the wings of passion that envelop both of you in a cocoon of desire.

The room is filled with the husky hum of satisfaction as he skillfully introduces a third finger into the delicate equation, causing your breath to hitch in a symphony of pleasure. 

The subtle, rhythmic sound of your mewls, like a sweet melody, harmonizes with the intoxicating atmosphere of shared desire.

A whirlwind of thoughts engulfs your mind, a tempest of emotions and musings that dance in a chaotic waltz. It’s as if a storm of contemplation has descended upon the landscape of your consciousness, leaving you breathless and slightly disoriented.

His teasing suction on your clit becomes a rhythmic pulse, each pull and release sending ripples of sensation through your body. Your spine arches involuntarily, a physical manifestation of the pleasure that courses through you like a current. 

Your breath catches in your throat, a melody of moans and gasps escaping in harmony with the rising pleasure.

You’re losing yourself in the cadence of pleasure, surrendering to the rising tide that threatens to pull you under.

As his fingers expertly navigate the landscape of your pussy, seeking out the elusive treasure of your G-spot, the anticipation within you becomes a taut string, ready to unravel in the most euphoric crescendo.

Each deliberate stroke against your G-spot is a seismic pulse, sending shockwaves of pleasure through your core.

The knot in your stomach tightens with every rhythmic press of his fingers, the tension reaching a point where it can no longer withstand the impending release. 

As the wave of climax crashes over you, every muscle in your body tightens, a testament to the intensity of the pleasure coursing through your veins.

The sheer power of the moment finds its voice in a raw, unrestrained scream of his name, a primal melody that reverberates through the van. The sound is a visceral release, an unbridled declaration of pleasure that echoes in the air.

Simultaneously, your vision blurs, the world reduced to a kaleidoscope of colors as tears stream down your cheeks.

In the aftermath of your climax, Yoongi moves with a swiftness that speaks volumes about his care and concern. 

He withdraws from your core, his face adorned with the glistening remnants of your orgasm. The concern etched across his features mirrors the tenderness in his touch as he strokes your cheeks, his fingertips collecting the tear-streaked evidence of your emotional release.

“What’s wrong, babe?” he inquires, his voice a gentle melody that resonates with genuine care.

As the haze of passion begins to dissipate, you become acutely aware of the tears streaming down your face, each droplet a silent witness to the complex interplay of pleasure and emotion. 

It’s a realization that unfolds gradually, like the petals of a delicate flower unfurling under the touch of the morning sun.

Your eyes flutter open, meeting Yoongi’s concerned gaze, the soft orbs reflecting a myriad of emotions—care, tenderness, and a silent inquiry. The unspoken question hangs in the air, inviting you to share the intricate tapestry of feelings that now envelop you.

As you tenderly cup his face, the warmth of your touch conveying a myriad of unspoken emotions, you draw him into a soft, lingering kiss. The sensation is a delicate dance, a symphony of lips meeting in a silent exchange that transcends the need for words. In that fleeting moment, the world outside ceases to exist, and all that remains is the intimate connection between your souls.

As your lips meet, there’s a subtle play of emotions on his face—confusion mingled with a growing awareness. It’s as if your kiss serves as a revelation, unraveling layers of uncertainty and paving the way for a deeper understanding. 

“I’m…” you choke on the words, the weight of them hanging heavy in the air. Your voice trembles, a symphony of vulnerability as you muster the courage to confess, “I’m late.”

He sits up on his knees, the subtle play of emotions flickering across his face—confusion, concern, and a tinge of fear that he’s trying to mask. 

The world around you seems to pause, caught in the gravity of the revelation. The soft glow of the room casts shadows on his features, emphasizing the lines of his furrowed brow and the intensity of his gaze.

“My period.” You exhale the words, each syllable a confession carrying the weight of uncertainty. The air in the van seems to crystallize as the truth hangs in the space between you two, a revelation that both defines and challenges the contours of your shared reality. 

There’s a palpable shift, a seismic ripple that traverses the emotional landscape.

As you release those two words into the room, you can almost sense the burden lifting from your shoulders, the unspoken fears and the silent cacophony of questions dissipating. 

Yoongi’s ‘oh’ escapes his lips like a subtle revelation, a key turning in the lock of understanding. His laughter, a melodic cascade of mirth, breaks the tension that hangs in the air, diffusing it like a gust of wind through a dense forest. As he laughs, his eyes crinkle at the corners, and you can’t help but be captivated by the sheer joy that emanates from him.

You turn to him, an arched brow, an unspoken inquiry, a silent prompt for an explanation to unravel the mystery of his amusement. 

“Is this what has been on your mind lately?” 

Yoongi’s chuckle resonates in the air, wrapping the room in a light, casual ambiance. As the sound tickles your ears, you find yourself frowning, an unexpected twist in his reaction catching you off guard. This wasn’t the response you anticipated, and it leaves a flicker of confusion in your eyes.

His chuckle, like a riddle yet to be unraveled, compels you to seek clarity. The lines on his face soften into a playful smile, but you sense there’s more beneath the surface—layers of emotion waiting to be uncovered.

You gracefully sit up, your hands instinctively finding support behind you. As you rise, there’s a subtle grace in your movements, a dance of poise and strength. 

His voice, a soothing melody, envelops you in a comforting embrace as he reassures, “It’s okay, babe.” There’s an innate understanding in his tone, a blend of empathy and strength that makes you feel seen and supported.

As he utters those words, his eyes become a safe haven, inviting you to share the weight of your concerns. You notice a subtle glint of concern, a reflection of his genuine care for your well-being. It’s not just a question; it’s an invitation to share the burden, a bridge to traverse the uncertain terrain together.

“Have you taken a test yet?”

Your head shakes with a slow, deliberate motion, a silent admission that echoes in the stillness between you two. “We haven’t really been close to a store these couple of days,” you mumble, your words carrying the weight of circumstance and a touch of vulnerability.

Yoongi’s voice carries a soothing cadence, a melody of reassurance that wraps around you like a comforting embrace. 

“Then you can take one when we get to Ansan, and then we’ll know, okay?” His words resonate with a mix of tenderness and practicality, casting a lifeline of certainty in the sea of uncertainties.

Your voice trembles with genuine curiosity as you turn to Yoongi, searching for the calm center in the storm of your emotions. 

“How are you so okay with this?” The question lingers in the air, heavy with the weight of your uncertainty.

“I told you before. I want kids, so I don’t mind. And I love you,” his voice, filled with a sincere tenderness, caresses your ears like a cherished melody, a symphony of reassurance. As Yoongi’s words wash over you, carrying the warmth of his love, you find yourself enchanted by the sincerity in his voice.

“I love you too!” 

Your words spill forth like a cascade, infused with a passion that dances in the air. The sincerity in your voice creates a melody that resonates in the space between you and Yoongi, a sweet harmony of shared emotions. He can’t help but chuckle, a tender sound that mingles with the affectionate atmosphere, like a secret language only the two of you understand.

“Whatever happens, we’ll face it together. Pregnancy or not, I want to be with you,” he declares, sealing his words with a kiss that carries the weight of unwavering commitment.

“Now lay back down so I can make sweet love to you,” he murmurs with a playful slap on your ass, drawing a light chuckle from you. As you comply with his request, the air crackles with anticipation, and the van seems to buzz with the shared energy of desire.

With your tears now dried, a renewed sense of elation washes over you, lifting you into a state of weightlessness. The earlier worries and anxieties have dissipated, leaving behind a serene anticipation for his tender touch. 

With a subtle yet confident movement, he draws you back up, skillfully assisting you in shedding your shirt. The air crackles with a charged energy as he guides you back down, each motion deliberate and unhurried. 

As he hovers above, fully clothed, a sudden intensity sweeps over the room. 

He descends urgently, his lips finding yours in a searing kiss that eclipses time. The embrace is fervent, a fusion of desire and hunger. He bites your bottom lip, a delicious intrusion that elicits a gasp, and as your mouths meld, tongues entwining in an intricate dance, the van seems to vibrate with the electric charge of longing. 

His moan reverberates within you, sending delightful shivers down your spine.

His hands travel down your body, his destination becomes clear as his lips find your breasts. A wave of pleasure courses through you as he takes one of them into his mouth, his tongue dancing with a rhythmic intensity. Simultaneously, his hand expertly caresses and squeezes the other, creating a symphony of sensations that leaves you breathless, lost in the exquisite rhythm of his touch.

His mouth envelops your nipple, coaxing it into a hard bud as he skillfully circles his tongue around it. The teasing bites send electric pulses of pleasure through your body, and you can’t help but moan in ecstasy. 

A surge of arousal courses through your body, igniting every nerve and leaving you acutely aware of the growing intensity between you and Yoongi. 

It’s as if a tidal wave of desire has been unleashed, sweeping away any lingering tension and leaving only the magnetic pull drawing you both closer.

Yoongi shifts his attention to your other breast, and a shiver runs down your spine as his skillful tongue creates a tingling sensation that sends waves of pleasure through your body. Each gentle bite and swirl of his tongue feels like a carefully orchestrated symphony, and you can’t help but arch your back in response to the electrifying pleasure he’s unleashing.

Your breath quickens, and the anticipation of another orgasm builds within you.

Yoongi, attuned to your heightened arousal, allows his free hand to navigate the landscape of your pussy. With deliberate intent, his fingers find your throbbing clit, and a jolt of pleasure courses through you as he gives it a teasing pinch. 

The dual sensations from both his mouth on your breast and his skilled fingers dancing on your most sensitive spot send shivers down your spine, amplifying the intensity of the moment.

“Ah!” an involuntary cry of pleasure escapes your lips, a raw and unfiltered expression of the ecstasy coursing through your body. Your breaths come in ragged pants, each exhale a testament to the overwhelming sensations Yoongi is coaxing from you.

His fingers dance skillfully over your clit, expertly pushing you closer to the edge. Simultaneously, his warm tongue flicks sensuously across your nipple, intensifying the pleasure coursing through your veins. 

In a crescendo of sensation, the knot in your stomach unravels, and you succumb to the powerful waves of ecstasy crashing over you. 

Ecstasy courses through every fiber of your being, causing your toes to curl involuntarily. Your breath comes in hurried pants, and the world around you blurs into a hazy abstraction.

As you slowly open your eyes, you find yourself ensnared in the gaze of Yoongi, his eyes reflecting an ocean of love that threatens to engulf your very soul. In those deep pools of affection, you sense an unwavering connection, a silent promise that transcends words. 

“I don’t think it’s fair that I’m the only one completely naked,” chuckling, you playfully swat at Yoongi’s sculpted chest.

With a surge of desire, you sit up, pushing him backward. The room crackles with anticipation as you grab his shirt, flinging it haphazardly onto the bed. Your lips crash against his in a hungry kiss, an unspoken urgency that reveals the depths of your longing for his touch.

Your fingers trail a fiery path down his chest. The heat between you intensifies as your hands venture lower, reaching the confines of his pants where a pronounced bulge yearns to be released—a silent plea echoing the passion that simmers beneath the surface.

In a fleeting moment of daring desire, you tease him with the tantalizing touch of your hand through the fabric, evoking a frustrated moan that hangs in the air. With an intoxicating mix of boldness and anticipation, you deftly pull down his pants and boxers, unveiling his throbbing dick.

As the last barrier of clothing drops away, leaving him gloriously exposed before you, he joins in the mirth, a playful chuckle escaping his lips. With an affectionate gleam in his eyes, he guides you back down, eager to continue the symphony of passion that has only just begun.

As his lips meet yours in a tender dance, his eyes lock onto yours, a silent exchange of emotions passing between those beautiful orbs. In that moment, it’s as if the entire cosmos is reflected in the depths of your gaze, and the world outside fades into insignificance.

As he reaches for a condom, you raise a questioning eyebrow at him.

“One last time before we find out if you’re pregnant or not?” 

With a playful smirk, Yoongi holds the foil in front of you, his question hanging in the air like a sweet promise. 

As the anticipation lingers in the air, you find yourself questioning the necessity of the condom. The unspoken desire for a deeper connection, to feel him without barriers, tugs at your thoughts. Yet, you understand the significance of this moment, a delicate balance between shared passion and the impending revelation. 

It’s a bittersweet dance, the choice wrapped in a poignant acknowledgment of the unknown future, making this last embrace all the more meaningful.

“Fine, one last time then.” 

A playful chuckle escapes your lips as you surrender to the shared decision. 

With a mischievous glint in your eyes, you wrap your fingers around his impressive hardness. A playful stroke elicits a deep, appreciative moan from him, resonating in the air like a sweet melody of desire.

His breath hitches, and he whispers, “You don’t have to, babe,” the words laced with desire. 

“I still want you to forget your name,” he whispers against your ear, his breath creating a delicate dance of sensations that sends shivers down your spine. 

You hum, a pleased and sultry melody resonating through your words. “But I want to. Please let me suck you; you taste so good.” 

He pants, his breath hitched with a blend of desire and amusement. 

“Fuck,” he mutters, a playful smirk tugging at his lips. “How can I say no to those sweet eyes and that dirty mouth of yours?” 

With a languid motion, he settles back on the bed, creating an inviting space for you between his well-defined legs. 

You crawl between his legs, a mischievous smirk playing on your lips. Slowly, sensually, you run your tongue along the length of his throbbing dick, savoring the moment before releasing a teasing droplet of saliva that glistens in the soft light. 

You take him into your mouth in one smooth, deliberate motion, the warmth and wetness engulfing his cock entirely. A primal hiss escapes his lips, a symphony of pleasure echoing in the van as you work your magic. 

With determination, you savor the taste of his precum, deciding to be bolder. You inch your way down, taking him deeper until your nose brushes against his coarse pubic hair.

As you breathe through your nose, hollowing your cheeks, the obscene sounds escaping him become a symphony that resonates through your core.

His fingers entwine in your hair, tugging gently, a visceral reminder of the intimate connection between you. 

“Such a good girl,” he murmurs, the praise dripping with desire and approval. The sensation of his touch, both tender and possessive, sends shivers down your spine, creating a delicious tension in the air.

As you pull away, a satisfying pop resonates in the room, accompanied by the symphony of your shared breaths. Gasping for air, you meet his gaze, and a playful chuckle escapes his lips, filling the space like a melody that only the two of you understand.

You plunge eagerly, your tongue tracing a sinuous dance around his length, creating a tantalizing symphony of pleasure. As you hum with a subtle vibration, the sensations reverberate, amplifying the intensity of the moment.

“Shit,” he breathes, his voice a low rasp as you feel his dick twitching in your mouth. 

You pull away once more, savoring the moment, and playfully trace the contours of the head of his dick with your tongue. Without further delay, you take him back into your mouth, the shared pleasure deepening with each devoted stroke.

You sense his hands in your hair, a gentle yet urgent pull, as he tries to guide you upward.

“As much as I love your mouth on my dick, I really want to make love to you.” 

He murmurs, drawing your head towards his, initiating a fervent kiss. The taste of himself on your tongue is a fleeting reminder, you know he doesn’t mind, it only fuels the passion between you.

He presses you gently into the sheets, the heat between you intensifying. With a swift motion, he retrieves the discarded foil from the tangled sheets, tearing it open before expertly rolling the condom onto his cock. 

As he lines up his dick with your eager entrance, a shiver of anticipation courses through both of you. With deliberate slowness, he eases into your folds, a dance of pleasure that draws out the exquisite tension in the air. 

The languid pace of his movements creates a sweet agony, a tantalizing dance that turns seconds into eternity. His unhurried rhythm, though almost maddening, speaks volumes of his desire to etch this time into the very fabric of your memories, turning the passage of time into a canvas for your passion.

Ecstasy courses through your veins as he delves deeper, the exquisite stretch sending a shiver down your spine. A symphony of sensations unfolds, and a breathy moan escapes your lips, a testament to the delicious ache that accompanies the perfect alignment of your bodies. 

With each rhythmic thrust, he unearths your most sensitive places, creating a euphoric melody that resonates with the primal rhythm of desire.

Your voice, laced with a desperate plea, dances in the air as you succumb to the overwhelming pleasure. 

“Fuck, Yoongi,” you moan, the words a fervent hymn to the ecstasy that engulfs you.

His grunt reverberates through the van, primal and intense, echoing the raw desire coursing through both of you. He begins to thrust with a tantalizing combination of slow, deliberate movements and rapid, passionate surges.

Every deliberate movement is a languid dance, a symphony of intimacy orchestrated by his tender touch. The deliberate pace allows you both to savor every sensation, each gentle thrust a declaration of his love and desire.

As he descends to capture your lips, it feels like a plunge into a world where time stands still. The kiss leaves you breathless, suspended in a moment that defies gravity. It’s not just a meeting of lips; it’s a celestial dance, leaving you weightless, floating in the ethereal connection between you and him.

Your thoughts dissolve into an exquisite haze, the only clarity emerging from the waves of pleasure he orchestrates. It’s as if the symphony of sensations has drowned out everything else, leaving only the echoes of ecstasy reverberating through your mind.

The knot in your stomach, a manifestation of building pleasure, tightens with every deliberate and passionate movement. Your hands instinctively seek solace on his biceps, anchoring you to the reality of the intimate dance unfolding between your entwined bodies.

As he bends down, his warm breath tickles your earlobe, and in a husky whisper, he confesses, “I’m close, babe.” 

The words, laden with raw desire, send a delicious shiver down your spine.

In the heated passion of the moment, his kisses are fervent and demanding. As his hands explore your body, a surge of desire courses through you when he skillfully pinches both your nipples with his calloused fingers. The sensation makes you arch your back, an involuntary response to the electrifying pleasure that his touch ignites.

In the throes of ecstasy, you can’t help but vocalize the overwhelming pleasure. Your breathless confession, “I’m close too. It’s so good, Yoongi,” escapes in a sultry melody, a raw expression of the intense pleasure coursing through your veins.

With a skilled move, he shifts his hand from your breasts, seamlessly guiding one of your legs over his shoulder. The new angle intensifies every sensation, his every thrust reaching new depths, causing you to release a symphony of moans that echo the escalating pleasure pulsating between you.

“You feel so good around me,” he murmurs, the praise mingling with his ragged breaths. As he maintains the unhurried rhythm, his skilled hand works wonders on your breast.

An electrifying surge courses through you, an unstoppable wave of pleasure crashing into every nerve, leaving you breathless and temporarily adrift in orgasm. As the echoes of ecstasy reverberate through your body, you find yourself in a cocoon of bliss, tethered only by the warmth of Yoongi’s presence above you.

“Fuck!”

Ecstasy courses through him, a guttural exclamation escaping his lips as the rhythmic clenching of your warm walls becomes his undoing. He succumbs to the wave of release, finding solace in the intimacy you both share.

As he releases your leg, it descends gracefully to his side, a silent testament to the shared intensity that just unfolded. Your bodies, now entwined and damp with shared desire, settle into a momentary stillness. His head, heavy with the weight of shared pleasure, finds a resting place atop yours.

He seals the moment with a lingering kiss, a sweet echo of the passion you both just shared. Gently withdrawing from your pussy, he eases himself down beside you, and discards the condom to the floor.

You witness the rhythmic dance of his chest, an intricate ballet choreographed by the ebb and flow of his breaths. Each rise and fall seems like a silent symphony, a testament to the shared intimacy that still lingers in the air. 

You gracefully position yourself on his lap, catching him off guard with the sudden move. The subtle sway of your breasts becomes a tantalizing dance, drawing his gaze irresistibly. A mischievous smile plays on your lips, a silent promise of the passion that’s about to unfold.

As you bask in the afterglow, a surge of emotions overwhelms you, and you can’t hold back the confession bubbling within. “I love you so much. No matter what. I’ve loved you for so many years,” you whisper, laying bare the depths of your heart. 

His eyes mirror your affection, and a serene “Me too,” escapes his lips, carrying the weight of years and years of longing. With a tender smile, you lean into him to seal the moment with a soft, lingering kiss, sealing your love in the quiet intimacy of the shared space between you two.

Hoseok’s frustration spills out as he declares, “I told you it was a bad idea to take Joonie there; he breaks everything!” 

The edge in his voice carries a hint of irritation, directed at Seokjin. As they make their way back to the van, the tension in the air is palpable.

Namjoon, wearied by the perpetual reminders of his purported clumsiness, rolls his eyes. It’s evident that the narrative of him breaking everything has grown stale, and his expression reflects a mix of resignation and mild exasperation. 

His steps come to an abrupt halt as the mesmerizing sight unfolds before him. The camp comes into view, revealing a sight that seizes his attention – you, cradled in Yoongi’s arms covered in blankets, perched on a stool by the flickering warmth of the campfire. 

The scene, painted with the hues of the dancing flames, captures a moment of intimate togetherness that momentarily holds him captive.

He playfully smacks Hoseok’s chest, a mischievous glint in his eyes. “Look at that,” he chuckles, his finger extending to showcase the van standing proudly in the distance.

Seokjin’s eyes soften with warmth as he gazes upon your tranquil figures. “Aw,” he gushes, captivated by the peaceful scene before him.

As you gradually awaken in the cocoon of Yoongi’s warmth, your eyes flutter open to find the circle of your friends seated on stools beside you. Their eyes meet yours, each reflecting a unique blend of affection, camaraderie, and unspoken stories.

Yoongi grunts a sleepy “hi,” his voice carrying the weight of the peaceful slumber you both shared. 

Hoseok’s laughter rings out, breaking the serene night air. “Hi, sleepyheads,” he chuckles, searching for a beer in the dimly lit surroundings.

Namjoon’s voice breaks the quiet night, daring to remark, “You look tired and glowing.” 

You release a soft breath, snuggling deeper into Yoongi’s pectorals, fingers intertwining with his.

Seokjin begins to utter, “Did you finally f–” but you abruptly cut him off, declaring, “If you finish that sentence, I’m gonna skin you alive and wear your dick like a party hat.” 

Your words hit like venom, leaving Seokjin, Namjoon, and Hoseok gasping, their eyes widened as if about to fall out of their sockets.

Yoongi’s chuckles resonate underneath you, the melodic sound wrapping around you like a warm embrace, a symphony you wish would play on a loop for eternity.

Author’s note(2): Thank you so much for reading! 🌸 I appreciate every like, comment and reblog, and please don’t be afraid to let me know what you think; your kind words makes me extremely happy 💜

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[i-am-baechu]

Chapter Three

Wishes (M) (Season One) 

Summary: After a long day of classes, Min Yoongi decides to take a break at the music hall that has become his second home. He walks in with his cigarette lit and his blank expression quickly changes when he sees a girl playing his piano. The moment their eyes meet, their lives become complicated and Yoongi blames himself for her future pain. Was the love we had honest? 

Genre: Gang au!, college au!,  strangers to enemies (one-sided), strangers to lovers, slow burn, friendships, romance, angst,  little comedy, and smut

Main pairing: Gang leader! Min Yoongi x Pianist! Reader 

Warnings: Explicit language, smut, mature themes, gangs, violence, smoking cigarettes, drugs, and alcohol usage 

Warnings for this chapter: Drugs, murder, and smut

⇜ Masterlist ⇝

“Make sure you turn in your assignments online! Have a nice one.” Yoongi closed his binder and let out a small sigh. He leaned back in his chair and ran his fingers through his hair roughly. It was another day of classes and Yoongi wasn’t having it today. He had a long night looking over things for his group, it was mostly numbers on drug deals and he didn’t have a problem with that but damn does it get tiring. He cracked his neck and grabbed his binder in a lazy manner. He didn’t go to bed until late and all he wanted to do was sleep.

He continued to walk on the campus but stopped to stare at the music hall, “I’ll see you tomorrow?”  He quickly shook his head and made his way out of hell. He had a meeting with Hoseok and Taehyung about what they saw last night. Hopefully, it's not that serious because he just wants to take a nap. Before he left the campus he stopped. He let out a frustrated sigh and turned around to walk back to the music hall. He opened the doors and silence hit his ears. His chest felt heavy and it was annoying. His eyes landed on the piano but he quickly looked away. He slammed the door shut and left the campus with pure annoyance. 

He entered the headquarters with a chip on his shoulders and Namjoon raised his eyebrow at this, “You good?” 

“Tired. Where’s Hoseok and Taehyung?” 

“Waiting in the office. After that, you should get some sleep because tonight we're going to the club.” 

Yoongi raised his eyebrow as he set his binder on the bookshelf, “Why?” 

“Taehyung wants to see if the club has new visitors and well...Jimin wants to get his dick wet.” 

“Fine. I’ll be back.” 

He dragged his feet up the steps as Namjoon watched closely. He was tired but there was something also. He couldn’t figure it out. He turned towards Jin who watched the scene with him, “What do you think hyung?” 

Jin shrugged his shoulders and continued to cut cucumbers, “Maybe he needs to fuck someone...he could be stressed.” 

“I’ve seen him stress and this isn’t stress.” 

“It could be that girl Y/N...”

Namjoon looked back at the steps with a small nod, “I need to confirm that it's the right girl but why would Yoongi be interested in a L/N?”

“You never know with him.”

Yoongi sat at the table as Hoseok nodded his head at him, “So far, there haven’t been any changes. No new clients for our supply or anything like that. It’s been normal.”

Taehyung took a sip of his drink and he nodded his head, “That’s why I thought we should go inside the clubs. Just to see things.” 

Yoongi sighed and leaned back in his chair, “Isn’t that dangerous? Think about it, if there are people there wanting to fight us then we're just walking into a trap.” 

“Boss, it's our club. If anything there’s going to be two or three. Not a bunch of them spread out.” 

“Fine. We go together as a group.” Taehyung smirked at this and before he got his question, Yoongi rolled his eyes, “Yes, you can fuck whoever you want.” 

Hoseok chugged his whiskey and let out a loud laugh, “Finally.”

“Hey! You're still on the job.” 

“We know, boss.” 

Yoongi went back into his room and sat on his bed. He stared down at his floor and sighed, it's been two days since he saw Y/N. Maybe she was just bluffing about seeing him again. People just lie to make others feel better, it was just human nature to do so. Yoongi scoffed and fell back in his bed staring at his ceiling, “Thought she was different...” 

“Boss, take a nap because around 9 we're going!” 

“Okay!” 

Yoongi slipped off his slippers and moved to lay his head on his pillow. He turned to face the wall and the frown on his face somehow got deeper. He closed his eyes and the only thing he heard was Y/N’s melody. 

Yoongi was playing the piano in a dark room with a single spotlight on him. The melody was pure sadness and each time he hit a key, darkness would spill out. No matter how bright the light was above him, the darkness always took it away. It wasn’t until heels clicked through the empty stage that he turned his head to see Y/N. She was dressed in a simple white silk dress with white heels. She had a white rose in her hair as she gave him a soft smile. With each step she took, butterflies erupted and flowers started to bloom. He couldn’t look away and she was standing in front of him. She sat next to him and glanced at the keys, “We should play together...” 

“Boss?” Yoongi sat up at the sudden voice and looked at the culprit. Jungkook looked at him with a confused look, “You were snoring...you haven’t done that in a while.” 

“I was tired...get out so I can change.” 

“Okay, we’ll be waiting downstairs.” 

Yoongi nodded his head and when the door closed he cursed under his breath, “What the fuck was that?” 

During the car ride, there was silence between the members with music being their conversation. Taehyung and Jimin were already high while Jungkook was tipsy. The youngsters were always messy, no matter what they did. Yoongi stared out the window and his eyes would focus on the streetlights. It was like his dream, the only light in the darkness that guided anyone home. For some reason, his brain made Y/N the light. That’s annoying. He needed a drink. 

The club was loud as everyone danced around him. He sat in the VIP room with Namjoon talking to Jin about something. Hoseok was chatting away with some blonde and the other three idiots were gone. Yoongi sat back watching the drop of condensation fall down his glass. He wondered if the drop was having a conversation with him or if he was going crazy. He looked up and saw Nina Lee staring at him. Nina was his usual fuck and even though she was married, it didn’t matter. He chugged down his whiskey and went towards her. 

She gave him a small smirk and tilted her head, “You haven’t called me.” 

“Been busy.” 

“Busy? Even for me?” 

“Let’s go.” 

He walked away and he knew she was following him with the sound of her heels. In his dream, Y/N’s heels clicking added to the melody while Nina’s heels distorted the melody. He shook his head and continued to walk down the hall to the private room. He sat down on the couch and lit up a cigar as Nina stared at him. The stare felt ugly in his eyes but at least he had someone’s eyes, “Cigar?”

“Yes, sir.” 

He lit it up and handed it to her. He puffed out smoke and he watched the smoke hit the ceiling and let out a small chuckle when he remembered Y/N yelled at him. The look of determination was laughable to him but he couldn’t help but smile at it. Yoongi burns out his cigar and turns his body towards Nina who followed him, “How’s Lance?” 

“Are you really asking about my husband?” 

“I’m asking because I know he's an idiot. Has he been talking to other gangs?” 

Nina shook her head and looked at the wall, “No, he only talks to you guys. He’s too scared to talk to others after the whole thing about the new gang.” 

“Good. Keep an eye on that.”

“Anything for you sir.” 

His tongue poked against his cheek, he hated that word from her. He did a come hither motion and she listened. He pressed his lip against hers, her lips tasted like smoke and cheap lipstick. The tip of his tongue licked at her lips and she knew what he wanted. She straddled his hips as his hand snaked around the back of her neck bringing her closer. 

He hissed when she rocked her hips and rolled his eyes, “You should know by now that I'm in charge.”

“Sorry, sir.” 

She whimpered at the dominating tone. His tongue traced around her earlobe before nibbling it. He squeezed her ass roughly and rocked her hips into his. She let out a moan but it wasn’t the melody he wanted. He spanked her ass roughly and watched her grind away on him, “That’s it. Lift up your skirt.” 

She nodded her head and did what she was told. He unbuckled his belt and let his semi-hard cock out. He already knew that she had no underwear on, she always did that. He began to rub circles over her swollen clit with his thumb, “Oh sir.” 

“That’s right slut. Sit down on my cock or I’ll leave.” 

She nodded her head and his hand grasped her hip as she sat down on him. She started to whimper at the thickness but Yoongi didn’t budge. She lifted her hips a few times letting the head of his cock be coated. His lips traveled to her stiff nipple as his tongue circled around her flesh. He spanked her ass as she moaned at the feeling, “Hop on my cock, slut.”

“Yes, sir.” 

She began to bounce on his cock as her moans echoed in the empty room. He leaned forward to light another cigar as Nina rocked her hips. He leaned back against the couch watching her rub her clit as she grinded against him. He let out a puff of smoke and wanted this to be done already. He started to thrust up and he watched her close her eyes. She let out a loud moan as he continued to thrust up, he took his cock out and rubbed himself until he cummed on her thigh. She was about to lean into his chest but he gently pushed her to the side. She closed her eyes as she gained back her breath. He sighed to himself and put his cock back into his pants. He grabbed a napkin and wiped her thigh the best he could. He pushed down her skirt and walked out of the room. 

He ran his hand through his hair roughly as he made his way back. He stopped in the middle of the hallway and looked up at the soft light. He brought his hand up trying to grasp the light itself. He sighed and shook his head, it felt like the millionth time today. He saw Namjoon talking to Taehyung and he raised his eyebrow, “What’s going on?” 

Taehyung turned around and took out his cigarette, “There was a murder by Heliotropes.”

“Who?” 

“Min-Jun.”

Yoongi nodded his head and took out his phone, “Hwan is already calling me. Let’s go.” 

“Yes, boss.” 

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*

Another class was done and Yoongi was going to leave the campus but his eyes landed on the music hall. He bit his lip and headed towards the small building. He opened the door and raised his eyebrow at the scene in front of him. 

“How do you know my name?”

“You capture someone’s attention. I wanted to see for myself.”

She scoffed at this and stood up from the stool, “Who the hell is this someone?” 

“Wouldn’t you like to know?”

“That’s why I asked. Who is this someone?” 

“He’s right, you're feisty.”

Yoongi rolled his eyes at this and walked up to stop the fight or whatever this was, “Taehyung, what the hell are you doing here?”

He watched Y/N turn around to look at him. He felt frozen under her stare but he ignored it as he stared at Taehyung with a raised eyebrow, 

“Should’ve known.”

Yoongi raised his eyebrow at this as he made his way toward Taehyung, “Known what Bambi?” 

She went back to the piano with her back towards them. He couldn’t help but stare as Taehyung watched with a small smirk on his lips, “That you know each other. Tyrants know each other.” 

“The fuck is she talking about?” 

“She's calling us tyrants because we smoke in the music hall. Keep up. Don’t you have somewhere to be?” 

Taehyung pouted but nodded his head at his boss. Taehyung walked out and he watched Y/N playing the piano again. His eyes widened at the melody he was playing, it was the same one he was playing in his dream. He walked up to her and She looked up as her fingers continued playing, “Can I help you?”

“I want to play.” 

“Well, I’m playing right now-”

“I want to play with you.”

She stopped playing and looked at Yoongi with a raised eyebrow, “You want to play with me at the same time?” 

“That’s what I said. Unless you think your better than-”

“I never said that so don’t put words into my mouth. Sit.” 

She moved a bit and ignored the scoffing. When he sat next to her she glanced at him, “What do you want to play?” 

“Don’t you usually compose your own music?” 

“I do but that wouldn’t be fair for me to do that to you. I can’t expect someone to follow me when they don’t even know my next move. It’s not fair.”

He nodded his head and looked down at the keys, “We can do Mozart.” 

“I don’t have a problem with that...Why did you want to play with me? You don’t seem the type.”

He scoffed and looked at her with a raised eyebrow, “What does that mean?”

“Your vibe just tells me you want to do things your way. That’s all. Not bad.” 

Yoongi started playing and his mind started to replay his dream from last night...

He was at the river with Y/N next to him. The only sound that could be heard was the running water in the distance and the leaves falling from the branch. She looked up at him and smiled, “Dance with me?” 

He didn’t say anything and gently grabbed her hand, intertwining their fingers together. As she nuzzled her head into his chest. They swayed back and forth as the flowers around them opened up. He rubbed her knuckles gently as she looked up at him, “Don’t be evil. I know you're not. Be the Yoongi you are with me...the world will see the real you...” 

 “That was fun.” 

He snapped out of his thoughts and turned towards her, “You kept up.” 

“You didn’t think I would?” 

“No, but you were shocked that I kept up.” 

She glanced at him and nodded her head, “I would be lying if I said no. Obviously, you play piano but I didn’t know the skill level. Did you ever go to school for it?” 

Yoongi rolled his eyes and took out a cigarette, “I didn’t have time for that. I just learned whenever I had the time.”

“You're very talented.”

“I know.” 

She let out a small laugh when she felt her phone buzz in her skirt pocket. She took her phone out and saw her mom was calling her. She sighed and looked at Yoongi, “I have to go.”

“Let me walk you.”

She shook her head and glanced at the cigarette, “No because you're going to smoke. I don’t want to smell like smoke.” 

He rolled his eyes and placed his cigarette back into the box, “Is that okay, Bambi?” 

“Yes...are you really going to walk me?” 

“Yes.” 

She let out a small sigh and decided not to argue with him. She picked up her backpack and glanced at him, “Can I stop by a store?” 

“You're not a prisoner.” 

“I beg to differ.” 

The two left the hall and Yoongi couldn’t take his eyes off of her. He knew that her parents were powerful in the business world and it made him think, why would she want anything to do with him? He was a lowlife and she was the girl that every lowlife dreamed of. She knew how to stand her ground and in the few interactions they had, he was already thinking of her. It annoyed him how much he thought of her. She was the wind and the flame to his candle, she was constantly around him or maybe he was going crazy. Who the hell is Y/N truly? 

She walked into a liquor store as Yoongi followed her closely. She went towards the drinks and turned towards him, “Are you going to pick a drink?” 

“Why would I?”

“Because I want you to have a drink?” 

He glanced at the drinks and then back at her, “So the rich girl is going to pay for me.” 

She scoffed at this and picked up her tea, “Don’t call me that. You know I have a name.” 

“Fine, Bambi.” He opened another section and took whiskey out of the cold. She glanced at the drink and then at him with a raised eyebrow, “You getting whiskey? It’s only four in the afternoon.” 

“Bambi you said pick a drink, you never said I couldn’t get alcohol.” 

“I guess...” 

She walked towards the cashier and went to take out her wallet. Yoongi glared at the man and he gulped at the look. He knew who he was, of course, he did. Yoongi was his boss, “You don’t have to pay.”

She furrowed her eyebrows at this and tilted her head, “I have alcohol...you need to see my ID..”

She watched the cashier glance at Yoongi and then back at her with a nervous look, “It’s covered. Don’t worry.” 

She looked at Yoongi with a confused look, “Is this-”

“It’s fine, Y/N. Let’s go.”

She nodded her head but before she left, she took out 50,000 KRW and slid it to him. She gave him a small smile and bowed her head at him, “Have a good day.”

Yoongi grabbed her wrist and left the store without saying anything. They went to a bench and she sat down next to him. He glanced at her and looked at her drink, “You like lemon tea?” 

“I do. You like whiskey.” 

He let out a small chuckle and nodded his head, “I do. Want a drink?” 

“Sure.” She took the bottle and took a small sip of the dark liquid. She frowned at it and gave it back to him, “It’s not bad but it’s not good.” 

“Do you drink alcohol?” 

“Sometimes. It’s not a common thing in my day-to-day life.”

“What do you drink then, Bambi?” 

She rolled her eyes and let a small smirk appear, “I like tequila...wine...nothing else comes to mind.”

Liar. Yoongi knew she was lying with that look in her eyes but he didn’t want to bring it up, “Interesting. Don’t you have to get going?” 

“I do...but I can stay a little longer.” 

He took another sip and raised his eyebrow at her, “You don’t follow orders, do you?”

“I already told my mom I was finishing off my piece. She understands.” He leaned back into the bench and she followed his lead. She opened her tea and took a small sip. She felt his eyes on her and she glanced at him with a raised eyebrow, “You look like you have a question.” 

“What are you majoring in?” 

“Music and programming.” 

He nodded his head and looked her up and down, “Smart.”

“What about you, Yoongi?” 

“Business.” 

She smiled at this and nodded her head, “I can see you as a Ceo.” 

“Why is that, Bambi?” 

“You just have this aura for it.” 

“I hope that’s a good thing.” 

“It is, don’t worry.”

They both stared at each other and she looked into his dark eyes. There was something about her eyes that held light. It wasn’t the type of light that you saw from the sun but the light that someone craves for. It was as if eyes knew the truth about him and understood him. That scared him. How could someone already have this hold on him? He barely knew this girl but here he is being understood with just a look. It felt safe and warm. He needed to push this away before it killed him. 

“Are you ready?” 

“I am, Bambi.” 

The two walked in silence but it made Y/N think more. If Yoongi was an outcast at his school, why was he interacting with her? He was weird and she didn’t know if he was a good weird or a bad weird yet. He was just weird to her for now. They stopped in front of her gate and she turned towards him, “Thank you...again.” 

“I wouldn’t want you to walk alone at night. It’s dangerous.” 

“I think everyone knows that...I’m assuming you heard about the murder.” 

He let out a deep sigh and looked away from her, “I did...” 

She nodded her head and pushed the button to go in, “I’ll see you when I see you.”

“Yeah, Bambi.” 

He watched her leave and he couldn’t help a smile appear on his face. A real smile, he hasn’t felt that in a long time. He watched her enter her house and the smile disappeared. He was annoyed with himself. He shook his head and walked away until his phone started buzzing. He pulled out his phone, “What Hwan?” 

“You need to pay a visit.” 

“Who? Don’t tell me what to do.” 

“Park Joo Won.”

Yoongi stopped in his place and scoffed, “The restaurant son? Why would I waste-”

“He witnessed the murder and there's a rumor that he’s a part of Demony na Zapade.” 

Yoongi felt pure anger in his body. That fucker was Y/N’s friend and he was a part of that group, “Don’t worry I’ll pay a visit.” 

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*

Yoongi knocked on the door and when the door didn’t open he turned towards Jungkook, “Open it.” 

Jungkook nodded his head and went to kick the door down but it opened, “Who is it?” 

“Joo Won?”

The door opened wider and Joo Won glared at him, “Oh, you're the dude that was with Y/N. What do you want?” 

“Rumor has it, you witnessed the murder of Min-Jun and we have questions.”

Joo Won's eyes widen and they shifted from Yoongi to Jungkook, “Listen-”

“Let us in now.” 

Joo Won nodded his head and let them in. Yoongi stood in the kitchen with Jungkook standing next to him glaring at Joo Won, “Talk.”

“It was the wrong place at the wrong time...I swear.” 

Yoongi nodded his head and took his pocket knife. He looked down at the blade and then back at Joo Won, “If you don’t tell the truth, I will kill you.” 

“I-I got that. I was taking out trash and I heard a gunshot...I saw this dude hit the ground, that's it.” 

Yoongi stabbed the table causing Joo Won to jump, “There’s more to the story. Now tell it!” 

“Fuck, I-” 

There was a gentle knock at the door and Yoongi looked at Jungkook, “Make sure he doesn’t move.” 

“Yes, boss.”

Joo Won's eyes widen at this and glared at him, “You're a gang leader...stay away from Y/N-”

“Shut the fuck up.”

The door opened and he was looking at the person that Joo Won told him to stay away from, “Yoongi? What are you doing here?” 

“Bambi? What are you doing here?” 

She tried looking past Yoongi’s shoulder but he blocked her view with the door. She looked at him with a confused look, “I’m here to see oppa...now answer my question, what are you doing here?” 

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*

Tag List:

@hopefulrascalstatesmantoad @secfir

[goldvenuslvrs]

sfw alphabet ; jj maybank

word count: 1.3k

warnings: mention of potential future childbearing, can be read as platonic (mostly) or romantic (reader’s choice)

note: ik it’s not a full fic but i wanted to get a couple of things out before/around christmas so merry christmas! (if you celebrate it), i’m planning on doing this for a few more characters as well as a nsfw alphabet (which i’m betting you heathens will enjoy more than this one lol)

A = Affection (How affectionate are they? How do they show affection?) As soon as he’s comfortable with you, he’s basically attached to your side as often as is humanly possible; the pogues have to literally pull him away from you and restrain him so you can leave to go to work. JJ’s open to all love languages but his favourite is physical touch, he loves holding your hand

B = Best friend (What would they be like as a best friend? How would the friendship start?) JJ is a little shit so a friendship with him could start one of two ways: either (1) you grew up together/you’re one of his friends siblings and he got a two-for-one deal when you met or (2) you work together/partnered up for a project in class and he basically said ‘this one’s mine’ and asserted himself as your best friend

C = Cuddles (Do they like to cuddle? How would they cuddle?) Is the sky blue? JJ loves to cuddle, he didn’t get a lot of love after his mom left (Luke definitely left something to be desired in regards to affection) and the pogues aren’t the most cuddly people in the world so as soon as he realised that you liked cuddles, he’s like your pet koala - wrapped around you as often and as close as physically possible

D = Domestic (Do they want to settle down? How are they at cooking and cleaning?) As seen by the fact that he tried to eat moldy bread, cooking isn’t his strong suit but cleaning? he’s not a big fan but he turns into Mrs Hinch’ when need be

E = Ending (If they had to break up with their partner, how would they do it?) JJ’s definitely a ghoster (sorry), he hates confrontation so he’ll either ghost them or break up with them over text so he doesn’t have to see their reaction/experience their anger

F = Fiance(e) (How do they feel about commitment? How quick would they want to get married?) He’s not really a marriage guy, he doesn’t see the point, he doesn’t need a certificate to promise to be committed

G = Gentle (How gentle are they, both physically and emotionally?) JJ can be a bit brash and intense but he can be gentle and caring when the situation calls for it

H = Hugs (Do they like hugs? How often do they do it? What are their hugs like?) (I refer you back to ‘C’) He loves hugs, they become his way of greeting you - he’s the type to fully lift you off the ground and spin you around if it’s been a particularly good day

I = I Love You (How fast do they say the L-word?) Getting JJ to say those three special words would take extreme patience (the guy’s got trust issues), it would take a year+ for him to say it (in a romantic sense)

J = Jealousy (How jealous do they get? What do they do when they’re jealous?) He doesn’t get jealous often but when he does, it’s usually over close friends rather than strangers or kooks - he knows he doesn’t have anything to fear with tourons or Rafe Cameron but Kiara? John B? Sarah? Pope?

K = Kisses (What are their kisses like? Where do they like to kiss you? Where do they like to be kissed?) He loves forehead kisses (giving and receiving), he thinks they’re so pure and while he enjoys the not so pure stuff, he loves them just as much

L = Little ones (How are they around children?) Babies are fine, JJ can handle them but as soon as they start speaking and forming actual opinions, he’s sure he can handle that (although he assures you that if you and he ever have kids one day, he’ll be a hell of a lot better than Luke)

M = Morning (How are mornings spent with them?) JJ is a late riser (with the amount he drinks and smokes?) and it usually takes someone coming in and shaking him awake to rouse him, especially if he went to a kegger the night before

N = Night (How are nights spent with them?) JJ is stubborn, he’ll refuse to admit that he’s tired until you quite literally drag him to bed, and after a certain time, he gets pouty and clingy and won’t let you go

O = Open (When would they start revealing things about themselves? Do they say everything all at once or wait a while to reveal things slowly?) He definitely takes a while to open up, it’s not easy for him to trust someone but once he does, you know every single thought he has, there’s nothing he’ll keep from you

P = Patience (How easily angered are they?) It depends on the situation - if you break something of his or forget something, he genuinely doesn’t care but if you ignore him or purposely do something to hurt/annoy him, he’ll go from 0 to 100 instantly

Q = Quizzes (How much would they remember about you? Do they remember every little detail you mention in passing, or do they kind of forget everything?) It varies - he’ll remember you saying you wanted/liked something in passing but he was no idea about your allergies or fears

R = Remember (What is their favorite moment in your relationship?) JJ will never forget the day you yelled at Rafe for him - Rafe had been badgering you about dumping JJ and how he wasn’t right for your ‘image’ and JJ had walked in on you screaming at Rafe about how much you loved JJ and it warmed his heart

S = Security (How protective are they? How would they protect you? How would they like to be protected?) Insanely protective - he’s protective over his friends but with you, it’s an entirely different ballpark; when you’re out in public, he always has an arm around your shoulder/waist and his hand in yours; at keggers, he’s always ready to jump in if you give me a sign that you’re uncomfortable

T = Try (How much effort would they put into dates, anniversaries, gifts, everyday tasks?) All or nothing - for significant dates, he’ll do the whole nine yards, nothing is too much but day-to-day, he’ll settle for a day out on the boat with you or a surfing date

U = Ugly (What would be some bad habits of theirs?) Whenever you argue, he’ll bail - he won’t show back up for a few days, obviously making you worry like crazy, but he doesn’t want to accidentally lash out at you

V = Vanity (How concerned are they with their looks?) Not at all, he knows he looks good so why would he worry?

W = Whole (Would they feel incomplete without you?) No - initially, he felt like you were his everything but overtime he’s learned that while you make him a better version of himself and he’d be devastated if you left, he’d be able to survive without you

X = Xtra (A random headcanon for them.) JJ has ADHD, it was Pope that suggested it and when he did, JJ was angry, he’d always been taught that having any ‘special needs’ made him weak but eventually you all sat him down and made him see that it wasn’t a bad thing

Y = Yuck (What are some things they wouldn’t like, either in general or in a partner?) Lying, he can’t stand people lying to him, especially people he loves/respects

Z = Zzz (What is a sleep habits of theirs?) Snoring, he used to keep everyone up with his snoring until Kiara bought everyone noise-cancelling headphones and bought JJ some nose plugs 

[burgycreeper405-blog]

*passes the microphone to you* so what is your fav ii dark fic about m8

super duper glad tou asked and didn't have to make you asked that bcuz no one was asking me about it/hj djfh

but my fav darkfic is simple actually

it's about mephone4

shocker i know sjdhsj

i started reading this when i wasnt even that into mephone yet lol

i was still doing the mp4 stock image meme dance lol

i m very sad that im not sure if this would get updated cuz this was published in april and updated in april, just a few days and aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa i am hurt in two ways jfhdjddj

caution, there are gorey stuffs there that even if there's tags there, it still shooketh me that i was like, *"holy sh1t, what am i reading?!"* (but not in a negative way) snfhsjf

like it went from 1 - 100 real quick (spoilers, or, warning,, it's about a animal that made me go "wtf" bcuz they're robots, it's fine lmao, but animals mmmmmmmm not sure about that sirmadam djdhsjj, and it's in chapter 4)

anyways, my explanation is gonna be very messy and short so bare with me here, i just wanna get this out now bcux most darkfics are just bad/mid/weird

so, this fic is mostly a what if/au

and that what if is a "what if mp4 failed to escape meeple hq" and ii doesnt exist bcuz, mp4 never escaped,, and the sad part about it is mp4 doesnt try to escape again bcux he forgot about it, cobs made him forget everything that makes mp4 want to leave

did i mention cobs is an absolute bastard here/neg didhjs

like dude, at the start of the fic, he is drunk, and he gave mp4 a smol task

but mp4 failed that task and since he was hella drunk, he smashed mp4 using a wrench, almost breaking him permanently

the brotherly bond of 4 nd 4s really makes it feel all wowie zowie, the author wrote them greatly like holy crap bruv

there's more in that fic, i think theres like 9 chapters and it took me 2 hours to read it in one go djdha

and i think that's the end of my explanation bcux my brain is all over the place rn and i just wanna get this out so bad

i might add more in the future but sheezus, yall should read it if you haven't/nf

i want it to continue so bad but i think it’s forgotten maybe,, hopefully not cuz it was just getting more juicier jhgfj

long story short, i love this fic and im still geeking out about it, i hope i can do fanart for this soon bcux i very much want to but brain says do it later, and you should read it/nf

[xoxobuckybarnes]

November 2023 Stucky Fics

Completed

Yours, Steve (Rated: G, Words: 9K)

Summary: “I’ve been writing a lot lately, y’know? Sam told me it’d do me good.” “Oh yeah? What do you write about?” Steve shrugs, suddenly self-conscious. “Stuff about him. How I feel. Stuff that I feel would help him remember, if he ever read them. It’s... weird. They’re letters, you know? Letters for him. Even though I know he’ll never read them.” “Well,” Nat says. There’s a determined glint in her eyes. “Do you want him to?” Steve blinks, dumbfounded. A smile slowly creeps across his lips. (In which Civil War never happens and Bucky makes a life for himself in Bucharest, tries to heal on his own. Steve waits for him, and writes.)

The Intelligence Nerd and The Avengers (series) by LilyInTheSnow / @lilyinthesnow

Bucky Barnes: Intelligence Nerd (Rated: E, Words: 114K) Summary: How Bucky Barnes accidently became an Avenger and married Steve Rogers. Or some shit like that.

Twitterpated (Rated: M, Words: 12K)

Summary: Steve's POV of Chapters 1-7 of Intelligence nerd. Steve's not twitterpated. Really he's not. Bucky's just a total badass and his future husband is all.

Twenty Minutes in Heaven (Rated: M, Words: 5K) Summary: Bucky's missing twenty minutes from chapter 9? of Bucky Barnes: Intelligence Nerd as told from Steve's POV. Plus a little extra. Pandamonium (Rated: M, Words: 4K) Summary: Bucky has a nightmare. It's pandamonium. xD A Small Matter (Rated: E, Words: 13k) Summary: Steve gets shrunk during a fight with Hydra, but retains everything else the serum gave him. Bucky's not quite sure how to handle Twink!Steve. In the end Twink!Steve handles Bucky. Tony, Bruce, and Doctor Strange have no idea how to fix it and Thor thinks Loki might've had something to do with it. It's fine though. Everything is perfectly fine. Probably. Or: Steve gets shrunk, fucks Bucky's brains out, and they make a trip to Jotunheimen, Norway. Steve might steal Stormbreaker from Thor and they might get chased by a mutant maneating weremoose. They also might get into a drunken snowball fight. Oh, and Loki is there too. Reading Fanfic Pays Off (Rated: E, Words: 16K) Summary: Steve and Bucky from Intelligence Nerd wind up in the Hello Future Husband verse. Barista!Bucky takes Intelligence Nerd!Bucky lingerie shopping and some other stuff happens too. Like maybe Steve gets jealous and bones Bucky against a tree.

***These fics are complete but the series is not. ***

Hello, Future Husband (Rated: E, Words: 20K) by LilyInTheSnow / @lilyinthesnow

Summary: Bucky Barnes might kind of, sort of, be desperately in love with Steve Rogers. Steve might be a little bit oblivious. Bucky might be a little bit desperate. Natasha and Clint decide to help. Kinda. Mostly they just watch and giggle, but whatever. Enter: Lace panties, super tight skinnies that may or may not be cutting off circulation to various parts of Bucky's anatomy, see-through shirts, and a small variety of now visible nipple jewelry. Nipple shields that look like Captain America's shield? Bucky's never heard of 'em. Never seen them before. How'd they get in his jewelry box?

Let me love you (Rated: T, Words: 4K) by thatgreenleaf

Summary: The Winter Soldier keeps trying to shower Steve with affection in the middle of fights. Steve keeps mistaking them for fight moves.

Fantasmic! (Rated: T, Words: 11K) by mambo / @whtaft

Summary: It's Steve's second summer working at Disney World when he meets Prince Charming (aka: Bucky Barnes, college kid from Brooklyn whose ass looks absolutely devastating in his Prince Charming slacks) and maybe starts to feel a little Disney magic in his heart.

I Held You in Gloved Hands (And I’m Not Letting Go) (Rated: E, Words: 48K) by Voylitscope_speed / @voylitscope

Summary: Bucky Barnes jumps at the chance to take a job opportunity hours from home. He's expecting a fresh start and a decent salary jump. He's not expecting to run into his childhood best friend, Steve Rogers, on his first day. The years since they last talked have been hard ones for both of them, but falling back into their friendship is shockingly easy. Despite their time apart, December in this small town might bring them closer than ever. (Or, a holiday romcom in which Bucky reads to children, Steve teaches art, new friendships are made, difficult conversations are had, cookies are baked, way too much coffee is consumed, home is found in surprising places and, eventually, feelings are confessed.)

I Feel Warm with You (Rated: G, Words: 7K) by LelsieSphinx / @kittytheroseofkirea

Summary: 5+1 winters throughout the lives of Steve and Bucky; filled with fun, kisses, wars, separation, reunions and softness.

Podfic

Late Show (Rated: E) by ipoiledi & thatsmysecret

Summary: “Rogers,” Bucky says, seriously, “You wouldn’t know how to shake your ass if one of those sweet ladies herself tried to stand you up and teach you.”

WIP

Treading Water (Rated: M, Current Words: 261K) by sparkagrace / @sparkagrace & art by Dyslexic_Fetus (Reagy_Jay) / @reagy-jay

Summary: Olympic swimmer Bucky Barnes always believed that when the time came to retire, he would walk away with his medals and world records firmly in the history books and never look back. He never thought the water would leave him first. ***Part of the series Lane Lines: Lane Lines (Rated: M, Words: 132K), Lumière (Rated: M, Words: 5K), & New Traditions (Rated: M, Words: 6K)***

Lost Vocabularies that Might Express (The Memory of These Broken Impressions) (Rated: E, Current Words: 76K) by dorian_burberrycanary / @burberrycanary

Summary: The worst of times, like the best, are always passing away. How’s that for some consolation on the road? A post-The Falcon and The Winter Soldier Stucky fix-it as part of the all-American road trip, detours included. ***Part of the series A Man Takes His Sadness Down to the River (The Consolation of Philosophy): The Same River, Twice (The Man Is Still Left with His Hands) (Rated: G, words: 4K), Still Left with the River (The Paradox of Motion) (Rated: G, Words: 14K), &  Not Language by a Map (The Grammar of Sensation) (Rated: E, Words: 20K)***

[hezuart]

What’s your Rating when it comes to Hazbin&Boss’s Songs? I Love most of them and some not to much, I Love That Short Western song When Striker was Fighting M&M and sound so Awesome! but was switched to a Pop Song and it was long, Plus I wished they could have stick to one Song instead of switching to the other in That Episode and we really didn’t need that montage of Loona being chased by the vet, Do we? I don’t know 🤷🏻‍♀️ I wish there were full versions of the Songs tho, What do you think?

Oh my rating? Let it be known I am not a musician, so I'm mostly rating these based off catchiness, lyrics, and context.

For Hazbin, the new official songs aren't out yet, so I'll judge the pilot's. The first song with Charlie... the "I'm always chasing rainbows" is a cover of an old song, and I think it's quite beautiful and perfect for her character. It is unfortunate that the song that isn't even original catches my attention the most. Her song "Happy Hotel" is too fast-paced and the VA sings too high, I couldn't understand what she was saying through half the song so I don't like that one very much. Alastor's was fine, I actually love the first part of it, that one would probably be my favorite. Angel's "Addict" is extremely average, but catchy pop, the lyrics are pretty nice. The animation that goes with it was also very good as far as an AMV goes.

Helluva Boss songs: (First=most favored to last=least favored)

House of Asmodeus: I have friends who don't like this song because it goes on pretty long and isn't all that interesting, but I truly adore this song when Asmodeus and Fizz interrupt. It's jazzy, and it's Asmodeous scolding someone for not playing by the rules of his establishment- and maybe even hints at the irony of what they're saying because Fizz and Ozz have a relationship that maybe (at least confirmed now) they aren't ready to acknowledge. We also get to see Blitz and Stolas get verbally attacked in the club, putting their whole relationship into question when this was supposed to be the first date they've ever properly had which misled Stolas into thinking there was more- only for Blitz to become embarrassed when Stolas doesn't stand up for him, solidifying his fears of their relationship being a "thrust"- I mean I could go on and on but the context is just so ... deep????? and it involves all of our characters and was a major turning point for the series, a really good eye opener finale all around.

You Will Be Okay: It's a lovely lullaby with pretty lyrics and a sad context, one that hints at a future tragedy to befall Stolas. A song that reveals Octavia, Stolas's daughter, who is very attached to him, and her fear of losing him. Stolas comforts her, but in the way that... if he dies, she will be fine on her own- that when the time comes, she won't need him anymore. Only to smack right into the change of Stolas now no longer seen in a positive light in Octavia's eyes- feeling betrayed and confused and hurt by him. It's just a subtle but powerful song.

Stolas Sings: I acknowledge the lyrics are useless in the context because it reveals nothing about his character, and this is the episode that completely messed up his relationship writing with not only Blitz but also Stella........ if the lyrics were tweaked I think this would have been good, but... idk I know its not great but I actually really really like this song. It's just so pretty and angsty... I can't help but love it regardless of the nonsense

Vacay to Bonetown: Verosika is a popstar, so, of course, we gotta get a song for her. She mostly sings about smutt and self-care, so the song doesn't have a bigger meaning, but it is very relaxing lo-fi kind of style. The lyrics are interesting, though odd in some aspects- but the point is a double meaning. Singing about going on vacation too, I don't know, it just feels like a nice summer song in a way- if it weren't so R rated ksldgjlkfdg but this one has always been a top fav

Monster's Ball: This is like??? The PROPER song that Beezlebub should have sung? This is really good and has unique lyrics that help, in a quick way, describe Beezlebub's personality and ...career? It's average pop yeah, but parts of it are rather catchy. This song is actually pretty good. I have no idea what is going on though with the music of this episode because Kesha was initially part of it and ended up going through legal troubles against Spindlehorse and no one really knows why. So there was a lot of weirdness surrounding the music made for this episode. I wish I had more behind-the-scenes context but... I don't.

My World Is Burning Down Around Me: A short song that Octavia listens to. The lyrics are on the nose and the song itself is only in there for like... 30 seconds tops... but its angsty and catchy so here's a shout-out to it.

The Ballad of Striker: I really really like this country song, the Mariachi band and lyrics are really fun. But context just doesn't fit, unfortunately, because Striker is no longer a secret assassin but in fact a very well-known outlaw for hire in the ring of wrath... just doesn't feel true to the original character

Oh Millie: A pilot song, but it's sweet. Millie's contributions are actually cute. It's used as a funny gag, but it also shows an interesting Bonnie and Clyde romance, where Moxie, despite his logical nature, actually really enjoys killing and adores his wife for being just as vicious. And Millie is enamored with his softer musical side, and may not be as good with words, but she still loves to be part of it. I don't know... Millie and Moxie from the pilot are different characters from the official series. I miss what they were before. Somehow I think their romance is more believable and equal, revealing so much about their characters in a single song? Like it's just really good. I don't know how else to explain it.

Mustang Dong: A song Blitz is listening to in his car. It's a fun catchy rock song, and the lyrics are downright hilarious. Very befitting of Blitz. Very funny for such a short sequence.

Loo Loo Land: A silly jingle, I laughed with the running gag of "No copyright infringements ever seen." And He did mock Charlie's "Happy Hotel" song which was also pretty funny. It's got references and gags and it doesn't go on for crazy long, I think it's a pretty decent song for the episode, and the context fits perfectly- Stolas enjoying himself like a kid, but Octavia hating every second of it. It's an entertaining plot device- and the character who sings it is gasp- surprise! Involved with our main character Blitzo! What a mystery?!

Moxxie's Bad Trip: This is like an odd opera-poem reading- er... I really don't know the genre it's a bit confusing. Some of the lyrics seem off-tempo while some seem on tempo. The lyrics fluctuate though, between serious to comedic. It's a bit of a messy tone, but I like it. Feels like a classic Helluva Boss song. It's really unfortunate though, because this is Moxie confronting Blitz over his bad behavior, giving Blitz a mysterious nature to himself, a Phantom of the Opera parody- it just has all this unique inspiration and mysterious context- and this is the song where Moxie and Blitz are meant to have a confrontation and grow as people in a character arc- but this whole thing is happening in MOXIE'S HEAD... and they act like it also happened in Blitz's too... so the context is just kinda screwy unfortunately...

CHERUB JINGLE: Silly. It's fine- I actually love it when they harmonize, but it was a little awkward because Cleatus's voice is deep in the official song where in the show its super high pitched- they did the best with what they could, but when I first listened to it I was like "WHO IS THIS MAN???"

IMP JINGLE: Same feelings as above kind of- wish it were IMP singing this though, instead of just some dude. It was written mostly for the pilot so it was rough stuff.

Watcha thinkin bout now?: The first part where it's a country genre is really good and fits- but then we swap to pop, but it's unfitting, it's not funny, kinda takes you out of the scene because it causes tonal dissonance. Despite me adoring the first half, I will admit it has empty lyrics. It's sort of just repeating its title, and is too short to really be considered a full proper song so.... again, love the first half... wish it could have been longer and wish it had more interesting lyrics.

You Got the Power: Random guy singing a song for that weird episode where Moxxie is really out of character and Millie is just screwing around on stage performing for humans. The context is silly since its literally just imps punching and stabbing each other, there isn't really any "power" in a magical sense here, or other sense, I guess... idk, but it's a pretty nice rock song despite the context being bad!

Crashin a Muthafckin Wedding: A countryish kick ass song for Millie at Moxie's wedding to Chaz. I don't like this episode, but the song fits the action scene. It's actually quite decent, all things considered.

Til the Day We Die: A more boring Millie x Moxie song ... I mean hey, at least it HAS Millie in it, so points to that. Just a song about being in love... where the context is jsut bad... preforming for human money to buy street art? Who thunk this up, huh?

Striker's Song: I couldn't hear the VA at all, the music was too loud and he was too quiet. The lyrics are really arrogant and weirdly sinister towards Moxie, it just didn't feel natural, it felt like a forced conflict. I don't see Striker as an overtly arrogant dude, throughout the episode he's definitely competitive but he's rather humble and respectful towards everyone else. Naturally, that's a ruse, but even so... I just don't like this song.

Regular Joe: Millie's first song by herself and it's completely useless. It's just about her being boring and plain, and somehow people love her for it. (looks into the camera like on the office) With the context being she and Moxie are wasting time on a mission that Moxie is supposed to be in charge of. It's just an average song, the VA does a lovely job at least, very pretty voice... interrupted by annoying screaming fans in between the lyrics.

Chaz Time: Still processing this... episode... Chaz is so useless.... I actually couldn't understand the lyrics because his singer was whispering so quietly... maybe the music was louder than it should be?

Look At This: useless lyrics, causes tonal dissonance in the context, makes the other characters look stupid and incompetent, the genre of the song is all over the place, intermixing into techno, heavy metal, pop, opera, etc

Cotton Candy: completely useless lyrics, extremely average-sounding pop, doesn't give us an idea who Beezlebub is or what she really does, the lyrics conflict at certain points

If I missed any, then I probably didn't pay attention to them and therefore probably wouldn't care about them even if I relistened

[lesharl-eclair]

strollonso fic recs pt 2: authors

4 amazing writers whom i am Watching for strollonso content. may or may not be their primary output, but whatever they have is certified delicious. apologies if you've read these many many times just take it as classic literature ;))

[part 1]

all fics below the cut; if you enjoyed these fics, please show the authors comment and kudo love; should you be the author of a fic that's here, and don't want to be here, please reach out to me and your wish is my command :)

@alpaine:

a strollonso pioneer (these works were written in 2022!) somehow i do not detect a single trace of rancid vibes. almost jarringly wholesome. very good :)

something in the air (T, <1k)

Fernando Alonso keeps complimenting Lance. It's weird. He's not going crazy, it's weird, right?

this is delicious (fernando Knowing and Choosing to praise lance knowing full well what it does to him........) short and sweet. a little glimpse into interactions that are dizzying to think about.

game misconduct (T, 2.6k)

**BREAKING NEWS 🚨** Alonso to the Canadiens. The return is still being worked out, but expect an official team announcement by the end of the day. “Fuck,” Lance exhaled.

the author really said "i love fanfic because i can write fernando alonso as brad marchand and no one can stop me" and i am compelled. compelled. i think the inherent homoeroticity of ice hockey really helps matters.

"holy shit, alonso" basically encapsulates this fic so well -- all the characters really come through and meld so well despite it being a different sport, and the strollonso is given the space to shine.

***

2. @wewentcarracing:

for me this is the essence of strollonso. little else comes close :")

silver platter (E, 9.7k)

Lance is well aware that the first word people typically associate him with is "spoiled". He's fine with it. Well; not fine, maybe, but mostly past the point of caring. He's not delusional about it, either. He's gotten more or less everything he's ever wanted, and he wouldn't have any of it without his father. If that makes him soft or weak or a brat or anything else people like to throw at him—whatever, fine. It's a nice life. He can also admit to himself that it's left him kind of ill-equipped for knowing exactly what he wants but not having any idea how he's supposed to get it.

if there is one strollonso fic to read, let it be this.

i adore the way this author does characterisation it is actually insane. the sheer intensity of nando. the way he puts his pussy into it. the magnetic charm and easy confidence. ESTEBAN AS A CHARACTER. and lance oh my goddddd the way you write lance is breathtaking. rich child mindset? how he isn't spoilt per se but there's still this lingering attitude at the back of his mind??? spot on.

also possessive nando might just be my favourite thing: “Let them hear. Why not?” Fernando says, voice rough and low and close enough to Lance’s ear that Lance can feel it against his skin. “Let them see what I do to you.”

all teeth (E, 3k)

Fernando has always been able to play with his food for a long time before he's too hungry to resist it.

this one i am actually addicted to. i have reread it an embarrassing number of times. pOSSESSIVE NANDO. and lance not being as naive as one might expect. the attention to detail here is insane (the parallels between the before and during....... the metaphors.....) the vibes here are like the richest dark chocolate cake. decadent and fantastic and so so rewarding.

***

3. @vicsy:

so much tenderhorny introspection. excellent character studies.

snapshots (M, <1k)

The photos Fernando keeps on his phone always tell a different story.

it's poetry, is what it is. short and sweet and the scenes it proposes are so fitting and immersive, a tiny glimpse into just how deep their relationship runs.

little flame, consume my hate (M, 17.6k, wip 1/2)

The problem at hand is that Lance can't bring himself to care enough — about his father's wishes, about his fate as the future king, as a ruler of a kingdom standing on a shaky foundation; about slaying a dragon who hasn't scorned him in any way. Even the thought of not coming back and perishing on this unwanted quest doesn’t instill as much fear. He has everything and thousands would wish to be in his place, but his life feels empty and artificial; lacking a spark or a purpose. Or: Lance is a knight who’s sent by his father, the king, on a quest to slay a dragon in order to prove himself. Instead of a mighty beast Lance stumbles upon a peculiar man named Fernando who wears a lavish robe and spends most of his time reading. Or so it seems.

this was such a fun read!! i really admire this author's scene-setting ability, everything is so balanced, detail-rich and a pleasure throughout. also also also also the au/worldbuilding....so much love mwah mwah <3 even through 17k words the narrative is well-paced and well-timed, and really drew me in :) simultaneously scared and excited for part 2!

shatter my life apart (see me for somebody else) (M, 1.5k)

For all of Lance’s naivety, for how easily he follows down that narrow path, it’s a rush no money can buy. A touch here, a not-so-friendly pat there, a show of teeth in a smile that is lethal and Lance knows Fernando wants a taste, craves to do so much more, something unspeakable, something that could turn into the nastiest paddock gossip to this day but it’s exhilarating — knowing he does that to a man by simply existing. Knows that, maybe, he wants it, too. 

this needs to be framed and hung up somewhere, i think. author's way with words is insane - the almost dreamlike quality of how lance is blown away by nando again and again, the jarring difference between lance's perceptions and the reality are rendered so beautifully here. a character study to remember.

***

4. @merenwenformulauno:

you make nando suffer sO MUCH... ....... but i'm still here for it <3

Between Gravel Traps (series) (E, 3-5k per part)

It starts in Budapest, then Spa. Then Zandvoort, then Monza.

i think this took me a few reads to truly wrap my head around. the quality is pretty damn impressive and the potential is insane - a relationship that's a little rough around the edges, but still so distinctly Them. nando brute forcing (?) (there is no way that's the right word) his way into lance's affection is something i definitely did not expect, but plausible and lovely nonetheless. i love the way it's slowly growing into a race by race thing, looking forward to more!

against the clock (E, 28.5k)

fernando is a cop. lance is the wildcat behind the wheel of a bus that can't drop under 50kpm or a bomb goes off. a normal way to fall in love. 

i had been putting off reading longfic for sooooo long you had no idea. this one kind of snapped me out of it !! a very masterfully done speed au. (loved all the little references but i will not go into detail bcs i dont want to spoil it here) this author has a penchant for suffering methinks. this work is still unfairly riveting despite all the pain, and the deliciousness of bonding through trauma is UNMATCHED.

***

that's all for today and thank you for reading to the end of this very lengthy rec list hee hee....there's actually so much more to this growing corner of ao3 so keep an eye out for more amazing works!!

if you enjoyed this, or if i missed any fic, please let me know :) drop me an ask mayhaps if you would like more fic recs, and i will try my best to give timely unqualified opinions <3

[reashot]

Summer Haunting/The Haunting of Ruby's House.

This takes place after the Battle of Beacon...

Ruby: Hey mom it's me again. Sorry for being late I have difficulty getting here because of my injury... Anyway I'm good baring the obvious. And I just wanted to tell you about my day...

But the real reason I'm here again mom is that... I ne-need your advice mom. I'm losing everything. Blake is missing, Weiss returned to Atlas and, and Yang won't even speak to me.

*starts crying*I lied. I'm not fine. I'm slowly losing it. I'm not a great Huntsmen like you and I'm not as strong as you mom. Please, please help me. Just tell me something, anything! Mom help me, please... Anyone...

Jaune: Oh, there you are Ruby?

Ruby: *wipes her tears* Jaune! What are you doing here?

Jaune: Yang told me that I can find you here. And what is that in front of you Ruby?

Ruby: Oh it's my mom's grave.

Jaune: I see... I'm sorry I didn't realize it.

Ruby: It's okay Jaune. And why are you looking for me?

Jaune: I'm worried Ruby. We thought you might be lost or get hurt out here.

Ruby: Well you found me and I'm fine as you can see. I'm just going out for a walk as part of my rehab while visiting my mom's grave. It's two bird with one stone as they said.

Jaune: It's dangerous Ruby if you want to walk outside you need to tell someone about it.

Ruby: Hmph! I may have difficulty walking but I'm not as frail you might think.

Jaune: I'm sorry if I offended Ruby. But I just wanted you to be safe.

Ruby: I know you mean well Jaune. But I just have to come up here and see my mom. I miss her so very much you see...

Jaune: *embrace Ruby from behind* I'm sure she misses you too. Ruby m-may I talk to your mother? W-with your permission of course.

Ruby: *blush* S-sure go ahead. I bet she likes talking to you.

Jaune: *blush* O-okay then. H-hey Mrs. Ruby's mom how's it hanging? Besides you know... I mean Ruby is okay, no she's great even. She kick major butt, she's a great team leader. Well liked by her teammates, heck everyone in the academy likes her. She made so many friends that it's actually hard to count them. She even made friend with a dummy like me. So please don't be worried about Ruby. She's in good hands.

Ruby:

Jaune: A-and I wanted to tell you that she's so awesome I once saw her cut a huge Grimm in half, she's... Ruby what are you trying to do?

Ruby: *trying to escape from Jaune's embrace* Meow! I mean. No! Let me go!

Jaune: Oh my goodness. Are you okay Ruby?

Ruby: *trying to hide her face* (No! I'm not okay you blonde himbo!) Yes, yes I'm fine can we please get out off here?

Jaune: O-okay Ruby. I'm sorry.

Ruby: You did nothing wrong Jaune. It's just that. Ouch!

Jaune: Do you need help Ruby?

Ruby: No-no it's okay Jaune I'm fine. It's just my legs that's all.

Jaune: Then I'll carry you on my back Ruby. C'mon hop in!

Ruby: W-what!? Uh-uh no way.

Jaune: C'mon Ruby it'll be too dark if I just let you walk back home.

Ruby: *grumble* Okay fine! You win, you big meanie! I'll let you carry me. *piggyback on Jaune's back*

Jaune: Yes I'm the big meanie for trying to help you.

Ruby: *lightly punches Jaune's back* shut up vomit boy!

Jaune: Crater face!

Ruby: Dork Knight Rises!

Jaune: Gun Nerd!

Ruby: Milf Bait!

Jaune: Future School Shooter!

Ruby: Hey that's going too far! *bite Jaune's neck*

Jaune: Ouch! Ha, ha, ha. I'm sorry but did it help?

Ruby: ... It did help. Thanks Jaune.

Jaune: No problems Ruby that's what I'm here for.

Ruby: ... Jaune do you mind if I talk to you?

Jaune: Sure. You don't need my permission.

Ruby: I lied. I didn't came here because I miss my mom. I mean I do but I mostly came here because I want to ask for her advice... I know it's stupid.

Jaune: It's not. I know how you feel Ruby. Sometimes when I'm having trouble I usually ask my grandma in heaven for advice.

Ruby: Really. You do too?

Jaune: Yeah. It's not as strange as you might think. And don't mind me asking Ruby, but what advice did you ask your mom anyway?

Ruby: Oh for everything but mostly asking how I can get my team back together.... Oh gods I'm so sorry.

Jaune: No need to apologize Ruby. Pyrrha lost has been difficult for all of us but I'm okay. And by the way, getting the band back together, I gotta say Ruby it's going to be hard. Even with your mother's help.

Ruby: I know it's a long shot, but what else can I do? I can't just wait here forever doing nothing.

Jaune: Well, maybe we can go find them ourselves?

Ruby: Seriously it can't be that simple Jaune. Besides I can't just find them all by myself.

Jaune: Then you can join our team and we will help you find them.

Ruby: You would, but why?

Jaune: C'mon Ruby we're friends. And besides you will do the same thing for me.

Ruby: You know what. I'll take you up on that offer. After I'm done healing up. I'll join your team to find Blake and Weiss, and dragged them back here together whether they wanted to or not.

Jaune: That's the spirit. Except you will not be joining my team I'll be joining yours.

Ruby: Wait, what?

Jaune: Yeah I think you'll be a great leader. And besides I don't think I'm cut out to being a leader.

Ruby: But they're your team. Aren't you at least upset about it?

Jaune: No, not at all Ruby. After all I trusted you to lead us after all. And because I know you can do a better job than me.

Ruby: It still doesn't feel right Jaune...

Jaune: Oh c'mon Rubes I insist. Also remember what you said to me back in Beacon. You must put your teammates first and yourself second.

Ruby: No fair using my words against me Jaune... But I understand I will lead you and your team. On one condition though, I will lead until I'm reunited with the rest of team.

Jaune: All right, fair enough. Then that means team RNJR is now official!

Ruby: RNJR?

Jaune: Yeah RNJR? You know. Ruby, Nora, me, and Ren.

Ruby: I see you must have put so much thought to the new team's name?

Jaune: Ah, ha. You got me Ruby. So do you like it?

Ruby: Hmmm..... I like it. It got a nice ring to it. And Jaune thank you for cheering me up earlier. I seriously needed that. And... *yawn* maybe we can just walk back home in silent. I'm so tired after walking all the way here.

Jaune: No problem Ruby. Do you want to hear a lullaby to help you sleep?

Ruby: Knock yourself out... *drowsy*

Jaune:

Frère Jacques, frère Jacques

Dormez vous, dormez vous

Sonnez les matines, sonnez les matines,

Ding ding dong, ding ding dong

Ruby: *giggle* Such a funny song... I like it very much Jaune.. Zzzz.

Jaune: (Sleep tight Ruby)

Unbeknownst to the two of them a shadowy figure from a far was watching the both of them these entire time.

??? : I found *** Ruby. We **** soon ** reunited...

Jaune felt a sudden chill he then turns around and look at his surrounding and found that there's no one there. Worried that it might be Grimm, Jaune quicken his pace but he made sure that it didn't distrurb Ruby's sleep.

Sometimes later...

Ruby: Zzzzz.....

Jaune: We're home Ruby... Ah, shoot can't wake you up. Well I better just put you to bed then.

Tai: That's far enough, Punk... *pumps shotgun* Stay where you are.

Jaune: M-mr. Xiao Long?

Tai: Is that Ruby on your back? Did you do something to her?!! *points shotgun*

Jaune: No, no wait please I didn't do anything to her. I swear!

Tai: You expect me to believe that you didn't do anything to my Ruby. Just look at her she's an angel, and you telling me you didn't take advantage of her while she sleep?

Jaune: No I swear I will never do anything like that to her.

Tai: Nice knowing you...*snatch shotgun* Hey!

Yang: Hey Vomit boy. Get Ruby inside. I'll handle my dad.

Jaune: Thanks Yang.

At night...

Jaune can be seen sleeping on the couch of the Xiao Long residence with Ren sleeping close to him on the floor on a sleeping mat. But then suddenly he begin to toss and turn in his sleep.

Jaune: Py-pyr..... D-dont go. Please don't leave me...

Ruby?: Oh Jaune~ can you come inside my room please? 💕

Jaune: Huh, uh... *wakes up* Why do you wake me up in the middle of the night Ruby?

Ruby?: *giggle* I promise it's something you might like to see. 💕

Jaune: Can it wait till tomorrow morning?

Ruby?: Oh no Jaune. I'm afraid it's something that can only be done in night. 💕

Jaune: But wouldn't it be strange to rummage around in the night?

Ruby?: *giggle* not this one~ And it can only be done at night... And during the day if you are adventurous enough. 💕

Jaune: Oh you mean. Like playing game during school night?

Ruby?: Well you are right it can be like a game. Except it played on a bed and preferably without anyone close to hear us when we do the deed. 💕

Jaune: So just play with your headset on, then.

Ruby?: ...... Are you kidding me? 🤨

Jaune: Look Ruby if it's not something important then it can wait. If not just let me go back to sleep.

Ruby?: ..... There's a spider in my room.

Jaune: *rise up* I'm on it Ruby.

Ruby?: .... Girl, you are not kidding when you said he is dense.

Ren: ... It seems Jaune about to finally get it on with Ruby. Good for him, good for him...

Before entering Ruby's room. Jaune notices Ruby's dad. Tai has fallen asleep guarding the hallway across from Ruby's room still holding on to his shotgun.

Tai: Zzzzz.... Must, protect beautiful daughter, must protect her from the blonde brat.... The strong must protect the sweet, the sweet.... Zzzzz

Jaune: Excuse me.... *quietly opens doors* Okay Ruby where's the spider?

Ruby?: *locks the doors behind her* Please sit down with me on the bed first, Jaune. I want to talk to you about something. 💕

Jaune: Okay...

Ruby?: Do you like me? 😌

Jaune: Eh? I mean yeah, I like you.

Ruby?: No, no. I mean do you like, like me. 🤭

Jaune: Like, like... *sudden realization* Oh.... I mean I don't, I can't. I don't think I can give you an answer just yet...

Ruby?: Then lets make it easy on you. 😈 *push Jaune on the bed and proceeds to mount him*

Jaune: R-Ruby?!

Ruby?: Shush. Not too loud. We can't have you wake up the entire house now can we. 🤫

Jaune: (W-wait what just happened?! Ruby ask me whether I like, like her and then she started mounting me out off nowhere.)

Ruby?: Tell me if you see something you might like? 💕 *starts to undress*

Jaune: R-Ruby w-what are you doing???

Ruby?: Honestly Jaune. There are limit to how dense you can be. We are going to have SEX *thrust pelvis*, hot *thrust pelvis*, steamy *thrust pelvis*, raunchy *thrust pelvis*, SEX... Oh it seems you are already hard. And oh my, you are so big! Oh by the brothers you are going to ruin my little Ruby in more ways than one.

Jaune: *internal screaming* oh okay let me go Ruby. This has gone too far as a joke... *tries to escape* (oh right, she is stronger than me. Oh I hope someone will come and finds us...)

Meanwhile in Yang's room.

Yang: Ruby finally decides to make a move on Vomit boy. Good for her, good for her...

Back in Ruby's room.

Ruby?: Oh, did you think you can get away? Did you forget that you are weaker than me.

Jaune: What?... You're not Ruby are you?

Ruby?: How did you know?

Jaune: Ruby will never demean me like you did. And she's never this forward before. Who are you?

Ruby?: Ooh, good looking and smart too. I would love to have you as my son-in-law.

Jaune: Son-in-law. Wait who are you supposed to be?

Ruby?: Eh, heh. I'm Ruby's mom. My name is Summer. Nice to meet you, Jaune. 😉

Jaune: Wait Ruby's mom. But she died?!

Summer: Shhh 🤫. Keep it down can't have you wake up the entire house.

In the hallway...

Tai: *wakes up* Hmm... My fatherly senses are tingling.

Back in Ruby's room.

Jaune: B-but how? A-are you a g-ghost? If so please leave Ruby alone.

Summer: Relax Jaune. I'm just borrowing Ruby's body for a while.

Jaune: That still doesn't makes it okay. And does Ruby knows about this?

Summer: Well. I maybe... Didn't ask Ruby for her permission to borrow her body.

Jaune: That is messed up. Please can you give Ruby back her body?

Summer: Ah, wait a minute Jaune. Don't you think we should continue where we left off? I owe you a "happy ending" at least. 😉

Jaune: No way Mrs. Summer. I can't do that to you. And I can't do that to Ruby too because I don't think she would like doing it with me.

Summer: *smirk*

Oh Jaune. This is where you're wrong. All those dirty things I said and wanted to did with you comes from Ruby. All I did was trying to make her dream into reality. Is that such a bad thing do as her mother?

Jaune: Wait is that true?

Summer: That's right. I have full access to her memory, wants and dreams. Turns out she's not as innocent as you might think. And she clearly have feelings for you, but she's too embarrassed to admit it herself. So... What do you say we continue where we left off? I'll even allow you to be on the top. What do you say?

Jaune: I - I have to politely refuse unfortunately.

Summer: Wow. A teenage boy refusing to have his pole shined.

Jaune: It's not that I don't want it, it just that I don't think it's the right thing to do here.

Summer: Look, Jaune you are a very nice boy and you are right. But I did said that she's actually in love with you so by doing this with me you actually will make her a very happy woman.

Jaune: I'm not going to lie by saying I'm not interested in it, but I still have to refuse.

Summer: Is it because I'm still inhabiting my daughter's body? I know it maybe a deal breaker but I can switch with her midway. I bet she will be so overjoyed in finally doing it with you. 😋

Jaune: No please! The last thing I want to do is to traumatize Ruby. And I haven't yet hear what Ruby's opinion on the matter.

Summer: She wouldn't mind because I'm her right now...

Jaune: Still, still I wanted to hear for myself whether she truly loves me and wanted to do this type of things with me.

Summer: Then I ask you this Jaune what do you think about my daughter. Do you love her too?

Jaune: Do I love Ruby? Well... To tell you the truth. I don't really know. But I think she's cute. Very cute. She's friendly, a bit awkward but that just made her cuter. She's also brave and smart and kind and, and. There just too many good things I want to say about her. And if I have to be honest it took everything I had not to tackle Ruby to the bed and have my ways with her ... Oh crud.

Summer: Hoouu.....

So whatchu saying is that it took all you had not to force yourself on my dear Ruby, violating her repeatedly, making her say your name over and over again. Hmmm?

Jaune: W-what no I'm not actually going to do it! It's just that the thought may have passed my mind because of how incredibly cute she is. And even then I still, will not do it.

Summer: Oh so cute you maybe want to eat her? 😙

Jaune: Okay, stop trying to twist my word... I like Ruby a lot okay and maybe I do love her. Maybe. But I can't give an answer yet. Not right what happened to Pyrrha.

Summer: Oh you sweet innocent boy...

*crash*

Tai: You?! You dare laid your hand on Ruby. Prepare to die!!! *points shotgun*

Summer: Wait Tai don't!!!

*BANG💥*

The next morning... 🌞

Jaune: *yawn* Oh what happened last night?

Tai: Morning Jaune. *whistle* Breakfast are on the table.

Jaune: Oh thank gods it was all a dream....

Ruby's Room.

Ruby: MOM!!!!

Summer: Yes honey?

Ruby: How could you possessed my body without my permission!?

Summer: Oh c'mon Rub-Rub. I did you favor by borrowing your body for a while. Thanks to me we now know what Jaune thinks of you. Now you and that Arc boy can go declare your love for each other.

Ruby: No!!! I can't do something like that!

Summer: Can't or won't Ruby? Because the two are completely different things.

Ruby: I-I just can't okay. I can't just say I love him especially not so soon after Pyrrha. I want to give him some time for him to grieve.

Summer: And after giving him some time, then you two are going to fuck right? I can't wait to have grandchildren.

Ruby: Mom no! I won't do that Jaune not until we go to a few dates at least. So till then I'm not going to pursue him.

Summer: Ruby I know you are just being considerate. And I know the feeling well, but you have to tell him how you feel.

Ruby: Maybe someday, but not now.

Summer: ... That's unfortunate, but will you also tell him the truth about the other thing?

Ruby: What other things?

Summer: You know... About the thing?

Ruby: I don't understand?

Summer: *sigh* about what really happened to Pyrrha...

Ruby: W-what do you mean?

Summer: I read your memory Ruby. I know what happened... You need to tell him the truth.

Ruby: I-I don't understand what you mean?

Summer: Ruby... Why did you let Pyrrha die?

Ruby: N-no. I didn't. I couldn't. I would never...

Pyrrha: Ruby... Why did you let me die?...

Ruby: NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!

----------------------------------------------------------

[starstruckunknown-princess]

Lilac - Jamie Tartt x F!OFC

Lilac (Syringa) - Meaning: First Love, Reminiscence

Summary: Jamie Tartt and Katie Archer were childhood best friends and had planned their futures together, but what happens when childhood ends and it's time to face reality?

Pairing: Jamie Tartt x F!OFC Katie Archer (NO physical description other than a name)

Word Count: 1371

Warnings: Language, takes place mostly pre-show, childhood idealism gets shattered, Jamie's anxious/angry reaction is slightly violent (NOT against reader), mention of Jamie's dad being a crap parent, enduring childhood love

Day 3 of the In Bloom Writing Challenge! I originally wanted this to be a whole series, but couldn't find the right way into it so I condensed it into a short fic. Also, this is my first ever Ted Lasso fic! That show is pure dopamine, I swear. Perhaps a teammate or coach of Jamie's will appear in his own fic later this month? Who knows? Oh wait, I do :D

In Bloom Masterlist

Comments, Likes, Reblogs are always appreciated! Thanks for reading! <3

9 May, 2009

Jamie Tartt and Katie Archer’s Unbreakable Life Plan To Remain Friends Forever

Become pro footballers (in the same city but not on rival teams or they’ll make us stop being friends)

Marry the fittest people we know (models, actors, or royalty ONELY)

Have neighboring houses with a pool that goes across both our backyards and a football pitch

Katie can have as many cats and dogs as she wants and Jamie can’t say anything

Jamie can wear whatever he likes and Katie can’t make fun of him

Our partners have to be best friends too

Our mums will live in our pool houses when they get old

And, the most important rule of all!!!! 

8. Any changes to this life plan MUST be discussed with your best friend, OR ELSE!!!

Signed,

Jamie Tartt 

Emily Archer

_________________

21 March, 2014

“Who is this? And what has she done to kick Renaldo off the wall?” Katie asked, holding the corners of the poster while Jamie taped them. 

“This,” he said, rolling the poster down to reveal the blonde girl holding two footballs in front of her bare chest, “is me future wife, Keely Jones.” 

“But I thought you were going to marry Heidi Klum and I would marry Orlando Bloom? That way we’d be the Klum-and-Blooms,” she joked, referring to their life plan since they were eleven. 

“‘Course I remember, babes, but I think Keely here is more of a sure thing. ‘Sides, she’s closer to our age.” He taped the bottom corners to the wall and stood back, admiring the poster while Katie flopped onto his bed. 

“As long as you’re sure,” she shrugged, opening her maths book. 

A football materialized and Jamie started dribbling, “Wanna go kick the ball ‘round?” 

“No, big test tomorrow, remember?” 

“Dunno why you’re bothering with that,” Jamie fell on his back on his bed next to her, “Don’t need school if you’re gonna be a footballer, yeah?” 

“Even if I played half as well as you, we both know I’d get less than half what you’d make as a footballer,” she said, rolling her eyes at the injustice of unequal pay. 

He rolled over and flipped around so they were parallel to each other and threw his arm over her shoulders, “Don’t worry, babes, I’ll loan ya cash if ya need it.” 

She giggled and shoved him off her, “Well how will you know how much I end up owing you if you won’t study your maths?”

“Fine! Five minutes to study, then we go work on your football skills. Maybe you’ll get so good you can play for a men’s team and get paid what you’re worth.” He smiled at her and she rolled her eyes at him. He was too charming for his own good sometimes. 

_________

5 August 2016 

Jamie perched on the edge of her mattress, absolutely gobsmacked at the news she just shared. “You’re fuckin with me, right? You…you’re just messing with me.” 

“No, ‘m not. I’m going to university,” she confessed, squeezing his hand that she held in both of hers to try and comfort him.

Instead, Jamie looked at her like she’d just confessed to being Jack the Ripper. “But, we were…what about the scouts from City?”

“I turned them down.” 

Jamie exploded then, yanking his hand out of hers, shooting up from where he sat next to her and began pacing. He crossed and uncrossed his arms, ran a hand through his hair, pulled at the strings of his hoodie. His limbs felt like they were too full of electricity.

“So what, all these years, all the plans we made, just fuckin’...don’t matter to ya anymore?” 

“You mean the completely unrealistic plans we made when we were kids? Become top footballers, marry some fit fuckin’ models, have adjoining houses with a pool going across both backyards? Come on!” 

That was the twist of the knife. 

“Fuck you, ya know that? I’ve wanted that all this time, believed in it! It’s all I’ve been workin’ toward since we came up with it! And you just go and fuck up your half…how’m I gonna do it without ya?” 

She reached out for him again but he backed as far away as he could in her small bedroom. “You’re incredible, Jamie, you’re so talented and you’re gonna go far. But it’s not for me.” 

“You mean I’m not for you.” 

“What? Jamie, you’re my best friend!”

“That’s not…we were…fucking FUCK!” Jamie’s brain felt like it was full of fire ants and his stomach lurched. He kicked a hole in the drywall before slamming her bedroom door on his way out.

The very fabric of their friendship had torn and there was no going back. If she didn’t care about him the way he cared about her, then fuck it. He didn’t need her, he would be the best fuckin’ footballer Man City had ever seen and she’d have to watch from wherever it was she ended up, hopefully somewhere miserable. 

He didn’t speak to her for the rest of their break. He didn’t see her off when she moved her things into the dorms. He never responded to her ‘Congratulations!’ text after his first game with Man City. 

The only response she ever got were three dots, appearing and disappearing. 

And then, nothing.

____________

August 5, 2021

Slipping off his jersey, Jamie couldn’t help but think about her. After all this time, he still remembered why he’d chosen 9 as his number. It was hers, her lucky number, her birthday in November, only 20 days after his. 

They’d grown up together, their mums having met at work and becoming best friends. He sometimes heard about Katie’s life on his phone calls with his mum but he hadn’t really listened to any since Katie had decided to give up on their friendship, on their life plan — the one they had come up with together when they were eleven so they’d never have to be apart.

Katie had seen how difficult it was for him to deal with his dad’s frequent appearances and disappearances and wanted him to know she would always be there for him. At the time Jamie had only gone along with it because she insisted that he could have whatever he liked in their future — it wasn’t until she’d announced that she was going to Uni that he realized the only thing he truly wanted from that list was their future. 

Together. 

He didn’t care much what it looked like, as long as it was theirs. As long as she was there at the end of every day. Which is why it devastated him when she left. Why he’d thrown himself into training and took his new life as a football star for granted as much as he had. 

Now that he was back at Richmond and apologized for his behavior, she’d been on his mind more and more.

Did he pop into her mind ever? Had she been following his career? Seen him embarrass himself on that stupid fucking dating show? 

It had only been five years but if he ran into her now, would they even recognize each other? 

It was a sad thought to have about someone he was once so close to — someone he, deep down, knew he had loved, and even deeper down, knew he still loved. It wasn’t like the love he had for Keely, his only long-term relationship amongst the revolving door of fit women he’d dated.

He wished he could describe it better than ‘a love I grew up with,’ or ‘love I didn’t even know was love at the time,’ but alas, Jaime Tartt was no poet.

He finished his post-training routine and made his way out into the summer night. On a whim, he decided to walk home. He needed time to think. About a block away from his house, he pulled out his phone and let his finger hover over ‘Contacts’ but he thought better of it and tucked his phone away. 

Only to pull it out again a few steps later and press her contact before he could chicken out. 

“Here goes nothin',” he said to himself as the phone rang.

[squidkid15]

Core AU

This shit’s gonna be LONG so lets do this. 

So Basically

Core AU is less of an AU and is instead more of the name me and @lotusmonkey came up with for our RP. It’s canon adjacent/continuation taking place after the end of season 3 and includes all of those events as well as as many headcanons as we can possibly cram into it. It’s really kind of impressive how many we keep shoving in there as we go. It’s ever evolving and we keep adding more and retroactively making things important. 

We’re just having fun. 

It’s not all that cohesive, we think of fun plots and go YEEAAHHHH and shove them in there and play it out. There’s a vague through thread in that it all happens in order to the same monkeys, but that’s about it. 

Characters

Okay so it’s mostly Macaque and Wukong, MK also plays a big role but we really focused on the two monkies. 

Important to note, this is NOT a shadowpeach AU. They are incredibly close now that they’ve patched things up and would do anything for each other, but there’s nothing romantic between them.

Macaque (I play him hi) is if you took canon mac and made him just a bit less angry and a whole lot more abandonment issues. Snarky bastard, more or less on the good side but only because that’s where Wukong is. All he ever really wanted was to go back to how things were before he and Wukong had their big fight, and now that he’s gotten that (more on that later) he’s pretty much mellowed out. He’s still an ass (and he knows it) but he’s not out to get anyone, other than rib Wukong at every change he gets (but its more playful than biting now). He’s very much of the “i’ll do whatever i want and fuck you if you disagree” but luckily for the rest of the cast, what he wants generally aligns with what they want. He’s back by Wukong’s side again so he’s pretty happy there. So, unfortunately, he hasn’t gotten much chance to be a huge pain in the ass lately. I miss his sarcasm.

He’s a demon through and through, with his “true form” (second pic) being mostly made of shadows and a whole lot more spooky than normal. He uses layers upon layers of different kinds of glamor magics he’s developed over the centuries to basically erase that form, he hasn’t even seen himself look like that in centuries. 

We lean HARD into the ‘mage macaque’ narrative, no one can match him in terms of magic alone. Getting into a fistfight with him isn’t fun either, but he’s mostly magic and brains. Can talk his way out of just about anything, we keep using the word ‘battlemaster’. He’s the thinker and the planner, and he and Wukong both know it. 

Good actor also. That’s come up a couple times. 

His core was broken when he died, and the resurrection put it back together enough for him to live, but it wasn’t healed (that comes later). A touch of Wukong’s magic runs up the side of it and deep through it, from how close they were when they were younger. A splash of LBD’s magic runs through the front and to the right, mimicking where the ice was. The gold (that comes from much later in the rp) that mended it is inspired by Kintsugi. It broke, and it broke badly, but was eventually mended once more. 

He has the very unique ability to interact with Cores on a physical level. It’s a very rare ability in the AU, and even among those rare few Macaque has incredibly fine control over it. He can give and take magic from them, rip them free, put them back, etc. We don’t do much with it too often, but it’s VERY important when it does come up. 

He got his past & future hearing back fairly early in the RP (lost it when he died) and since then no longer hides the six ears unless he has a reason to. 

Also he’s just. Full on cat. I think he purred once.

Wukong (played by Hawk/ @lotusmonkey ) is if you took canon Wukong but held together by ducktape, MK, Macaque, and at least seven prayers. This man needs SO much therapy. He’s really good at hiding this fact, however (to everyone but Macaque) and instead puts on a really good carefree front. Pretty confident in himself in the moment and when things work out, but he’ll second guess himself pretty quick if they go to shit. He’ll rib back at Macaque at every opportunity, and we’ve made several jokes about him tackling Mac from across the room. He’s super protective, especially over MK and Macaque, and will get himself brutally injured in a heartbeat if it means keeping the others safe.

He has like 0 sense of self preservation. After centuries of getting injured in new and brutal ways it really doesn’t phase him anymore. He knows nothing can kill him, and has decided it’d be a nice surprise if something ended up managing it. 

He’s super attached to his glamors, and will not go around without them under any circumstances. There has been one time in the RP where he dropped them willingly, and it was for only in one spot and only a couple minutes. There was another time where he was forced to drop ALL of them for an extended period of time, and it took a pretty big toll on him. 

He sees MK as a son, though he doesn’t admit it out loud, and is unbelievably proud of him and everything he’s accomplished. Again, very protective of him and will do anything to keep him safe while also helping him unlock his powers to the fullest. 

He’s very happy to have Macaque back in his life and on good terms once more, and has promised to ‘never leave him behind again’. For better or for worse, they’re sticking to this. Calls Macaque his ‘battle brother’ and ‘best friend’ and means it. 

The weight of being ‘Monkey King’ rests heavily on him, with all the expectations to have all the answers and fixes and having to be perfect at all times. Tired of the weight of the world on his shoulders, but has also more or less accepted that he doesn’t have much of a choice in the matter, despite how miserable it makes him. 

He needs a lot of hugs. 

MK has a bit less screentime/building time than the other two, but he’s just as important in most of the story. He’s much the same as in the show, but maybe a bit calmer/more responsible. Hawk and I both play him depending on which monkey he’s talking to at the time, but its primarily Hawk. He’s still a good kid, and shares Wukong’s wildly protective nature, for both monkies. He sees them both (and the rest of the gang) as family, and would do anything for any of them. 

He’s very curious, always excited to learn more about how something works or about a new power and magic, and eager to try it right away. 

His powers are a bit more of a combination of the two monkies, he sees them both as his mentors even if Macaque would deny it and Wukong would be wildly offended. His powers are much more adaptable, so he he actually has a mix of the two of them. All of Wukong’s strength and resilience, but after the first event in the RP (more on that later) he’s gained the ability to tap into some of Macaque’s powers as well, including eventually his ability to interact with cores. 

We turned him into a monkey very early on (yes, turned into) but he’s taking it well. Macaque and Wukong taught him glamor magic immediately after so he could look like his old self if he wanted to once more. 

The more he gets to know Wukong on a personal instead of student/teacher level, the more he’s slowly starting to see beneath Wukong’s mask and just how much of a mess he is beneath it all, and is working on trying to figure out how best to fix it. 

Cores

The namesake of the AU, cores are the biggest difference/headcanon that really defines how the AU plays out, and a whole lot of the plot points. The biggest separation from canon and the AU is cores and how we treat them and interact with them in the AU.

Cores are, essentially, souls. Every being has them, but immortals are several times the size of a mortals because they also double as a magic source/storage. They are pure magic, not a physical entity like an organ, though they are just as essential. 

A soul is everything a person is. Thoughts, feelings, personality, etc. To immortals, they are also a power source. A finite (but very large) pool of magic from which immortals draw upon for magic. Some immortals tap into theirs more than others, it all depends on their magic. Macaque uses his far more than Wukong, for example, because Macaque uses far more magic. He opens portals, summons shadows, forms shadows into things, etc. All of these tap into his core. Sort of like a mana pool in a video game. Wukong, on the other hand, hardly ever taps into his. He’s far more physical, and will instead punch or kick instead of using magic. 

Cores can be depleted through various means. It could be as simple as using too much magic before there’s time for it to regenerate (very rare, there is VAST amounts of magic in a core, naturally burning it all down is almost unheard of) or something draining it (which we have toyed with a few times in different ways). Draining a core is dangerous, but not fatal until and unless they are drained dry. Recovery is as simple as not using magic and resting for some time. If the mechanism to deplete a core is a bit more violent, it can sometimes take some time before using magic feels normal again, and can even be painful if too much is used too soon. 

Cores can also be broken (different from being drained). Cores can only be broken by magical means, or the death of the body. A core breaks naturally in death, but can also be the cause (as was Macaque’s). A broken core is fatal. 

Cores can crack or be damaged over time, and this is actually fairly common in immortals. The cracks don’t do any real tangible damage to the core, but is a sign of some sort of trauma. Either to the core directly, or emotional/mental can be a cause as well. 

They’re...sort of nebulously physical. They aren’t a physical thing like an organ, there is no space in the chest for them and they aren’t there after death. They’re entirely magical, but do have an appearance (Wukong and MK can see them with gold vision/true sight). Each one looks different to each person in color/design. They only gain a physical form when one is given to them by some sort of magic designed to interact with them. A weapon that has been enchanted to target the core specifically can touch a core (in my head they have a similar texture/material to those solid glass ball knickknacks). Macaque can also give them a more physical form because of his ability to remove them. Once removed they can be held by others, but it’s only after Macaque has given them a form. It makes sense in my head but as soon as I put it on paper it sounds a bit silly lmao. 

Plot

It’s ongoing, like I said, because we just keep thinking of fun new things to add to it and we’re planning like 15 plot points ahead of where we’ve already written, but the barebones of where we’ve gone so far:

1. MK saves Macaque & Macaque saves MK

This whole thing actually started as just a one-off idea & RP (as you do) and was meant to just explore an idea. But now we’re almost a month into a single throughplot. But the original idea was based on mage mac and how he relies much more heavily on magic to run than MK or Wukong, who have just their 7 kinds of immortality. MK and Macaque being trapped somewhere that sapped their magic (we later decided they got kidnapped when MK delivered noodles to Mac’s place, sorta retconned in the “how”), Macaque’s a lot faster than MK. MK manages to hold out/make it easier on Macaque for as long as he can, until they’re both on death’s door. When he’s basically out, he offers his core to Macaque to take, break, and use it to save himself (like how he does when they first meet, but more willingly and a bit more desperate). 

Mac, who has since grown a bit fond of MK, does something slightly different. He still takes some of the power from MK’s core to open a portal and get them both out of there, but doesn’t break it. Instead, when he pulls it out, MK turns to stone. 

Wukong shows up at this point, having felt them arrive on his mountain and sees Mac like seven eights dead and MK turned to stone trying to protect him. He’s Not Happy but after a bit of explaining from Mac, doesn’t take it out on him. Instead, to reverse it, Macaque acts as a conduit to recharge MK’s core using Wukong’s. One hand on Wukong’s, one hand on MKs, letting the power move through him to charge MK’s core enough that it’s no longer in any danger. Mac struggles with the urge to just crush Wukong’s core right then and there because they’re still on terrible terms. He resists. The stone cracks, MK is saved, but is now monkey after getting a direct shot of Wukong’s magic (this is also where MK picks up his ability to use some of mac’s powers). 

Head back to the mountain for some recovery time, teaching MK how to glamor. Wukong and Mac snark at each other over it. Eventually they break into an argument about Macaque’s death - turns out Wukong had no idea Macaque died. He thought macaque went off on his own after their fight to stew and wanted nothing to do with Wukong again. Macaque was killed by a third party immediately after the fight, soon enough that he thought it was Wukong. They make up (maybe a bit quick, if I could go back and rewrite I would maybe make it take longer, but thats just me and we were excited to get to the fun of them being buddies again. Like I said, this is mostly for fun instead of a cohesive plot)  and make a Very Important promise. 

"I.. I can't go back, I can't change it. But.. I won't leave you behind. Never again."

“I'm going to hold you to that this time. For better or for worse, you're not leaving me behind again."

Mac finishes recovering, MK takes a bit longer because he was so much more damaged.

2. Storming heaven & the mayor

Turns out, while mac and MK were captured and being drained like batteries, Wukong was running around interrogating people trying to figure out where the fuck his rival and kid ended up. He gets a few vague leads before they manage to escape on their own.

During the recovery, before he and Mac made up, Wukong was periodically popping in and out to continue his hunt for answers. After they make up, Wukong stays true to his word and doesn’t leave Mac behind. Once he’s all better, however, they’re off. One of the leads Wukong found was that the assassination attempt was orchestrated by someone up in the celestial realm itself, and he and Macaque go kicking in their door (very literally) for answers. 

They get a couple. The attempt on Mac’s life was because heaven saw him and Wukong working together in the battle against LBD and feared what would happen with the two of them together once more. The attempt on MK’s life was because they feared a second Wukong, and some calamity he was supposed to bring (foreshadowing go BRRRRR). The mechanism of the attempt on their lives is something (we made up) called the Dark Ravine. Some ancient thing that was used to kill immortals, drained the magic out of them. It hasn’t been used for some time. 

They also find that one of heaven’s court is infected with...something. They don’t know what it is. But the noble keels over half-dead after muttering some ominous nonsense. Mac and Wukong are understandably a bit wigged out, as is the rest of the court. Ne’Zha (who we again passed back and fourth, but usually ended up being me) is assigned to join them on their quest to figure out what the hell happened. They leave with more questions than answers.

They keep searching, busting in more doors in both the celestial and mortal realms. After one such dead end in the mortal realm, the three of them are attacked by the not-mayor, who appears to have a new master. Macaque and Wukong beat him up pretty good (Ne’Zha stays out to evacuate some civilians because the two of them is already wildly overkill) until Macaque stumbles, his core flaring up after so much intense use so soon after it was damaged. The Mayor tries to take advantage of this, going for Macaque, but Wukong takes the hit instead. Immediately after, the mayor makes his exit with some cryptic words. 

3. Sick Wukong & the shadow

They keep going, Macaque notices the hit seems to be bothering Wukong some but Wukong plays it off well enough that Mac sorta forgets. Keep searching, Macaque pushes Wukong into a river at one point when they stop for the night. It’s very cute. Water wars part one. 

We do a lot of timeskipping at this point as the 3 go around. At one point Wukong astral projects to check on MK. He’s still doing good, the rest of the gang came up to the mountain to hang out.

Wukong slowly starts to slow down, acting sick. He goes from being the first person awake to the last one, and he’s just not all there. Very cold, and Mac starts to notice and get worried. Before he can really properly bring it up, however, they’re attacked again. 

This time, but some broken, twisted Shadow Macaque. It looks like one of his clones, but it’s all sorts of messed up. It gets a couple really good hits on Wukong, and is definitely targeting him, more or less ignoring Macaque and Ne’Zha. One of the hits rips Wukong’s glamors (& hoodie, he slept in a hoodie and they were attacked pretty early in the morning) and reveals a big black crack looking thing over his chest, where the mayor hit him. He’s Not Doing Good, so Macaque and Ne’Zha have to try and protect him. 

The shadow thing, turns out, is using Mac’s lantern as a core/power source, but Macaque can’t get to it without risk of being infected the same way they now know Wukong was. Wukong, being the self sacrificing idiot he is, uses himself as bait to give Mac an opening to rip the lantern free, but Wukong gets really badly injured in the process. Now with his old weapon in hand, Mac’s more or less unstoppable and crushes the shadow before rushing to check on Wukong. 

4. Mac’s turn in the blender

Right after he gets there, a portal opens beneath him and Wukong. It’s some twisted thing, one he almost recognizes (black center & blue fire ring), and it drops them both in the ruins of LBD’s mech. Snowy cold and big chunks of metal scattered everywhere, very cool image. They got separated in the portal travel, and Mac starts hunting for Wukong. 

Wukong, meanwhile, is REALLY not doing good. The attacks from the shadow made the infection worse, and he’s basically delirious. The mayor (the one who portaled them) finds him before Mac does, and starts dragging him off to Somewhere ( :) ). 

Mac keeps searching, and eventually finds the both of them in the center of the ruins of the mech. Big, empty circle where the butt of the staff crushed everything under it. In the center there’s the furnace, and the mayor dragging a very limp Wukong towards it. 

Mac jumps in to protect Wukong, and it....doesn’t go well. 

The mayor’s new master is the ravine (which is sorta weirdly semi-sentient, enough to make plans but all it really wants is to feed on magic) and he’s working with it in order to eliminate the major threats that thwarted his lady, getting them out of the way so he can can continue her work. Part of that agreement is that the mayor gets some...upgrades. The ravine has already chewed on a decent chunk of Mac’s power (where the shadow came from, and where the mayor got the almost-familiar portal) as well as MK’s and now Wukong’s (from the infection). And the mayor got some of those powers in order to help deliver the entirety of the monkey’s cores to the ravine.

Mac gets flattened. 

He’s broken in all of the places in only a couple hits, and the mayor goes back to trying to melt Wukong down again. Mac manages to talk the mayor into trying to kill mac first, with the plan that he could portal away from the inside of the furnace without the mayor ever knowing. 

Unfortunately, the furnace acts as a sort of nullifier, and mac’s magic doesn’t work inside it. Wukong woke up enough to see Mac getting dropped in and panics hard enough to basically nuke the area, blowing up anything that could be used to light the furnace and damaging the mayor enough that he leaves to recuperate. He knocks himself the fuck out when he nukes the place, and the mayor gives him a solid kick in anger before leaving, really messing his chest up.

Mac has no idea this has happened, the furnace is completely soundproof, and he’s stuck with the sound of himself alone. 

Ne’Zha, meanwhile, has started searching for the monkies after they dropped through a portal that didn’t seem too intentional - Mac left the lantern behind. After coming up empty each time, he contacts MK in the hopes that they had gone back to him. This, in turn, freaks MK out and he and Ne’Zha meet up to go track the monkies down. Combining his gold vision with the magic in Mac’s lantern, MK manages to lead them to the monkies. They see the remains of Mac’s fight with the mayor and are Immediately worried because there’s a whole lot of blood. They see Wukong first and fret over him before the furnace starts yelling to MK again (like it did telling him to stop in the show) and they find Mac. 

In the time it took for Ne’Zha to find MK and for them to arrive at the furnace, it’s given Macaque his past & future hearing back. (the reasoning being that it gave wukong sight, and talked to MK, we were wondering what it would do for Mac). Mac hasn’t had this power in centuries, and he’s beyond overwhelmed by hearing everything all at once as well as how broken he is from the fight.

They manage to get the monkies home, but it’s not fun for anyone. 

5. Fever Wukong Arc (tm)

Ne’Zha borrows a healer from heaven to at least get the monkies off death’s doorstep, but there’s only so much they can do because they don’t know what’s wrong with Wukong, and Macaque is VERY broken. 

They spend a few days unconscious, and eventually Mac wakes up first. MK gives him some pretty heavy duty earmuffs to block out most of the sounds because Mac is in Sensory Hell while he can’t control this power, and doesn’t talk for a while because its too loud. 

Wukong takes a lot longer to wake up, and he’s barely there for most of it. He’s deep in the fever and super delirious, it’s not very often he’s fully aware. He accidentally reveals some Trauma in his haze, and his glamors are forced to drop when the infection drags on his magic too much. Macaque actually has to forcefully remove them because Wukong would have killed himself trying to hang on to them and fighting the infection like that. He doesn’t take it well. 

Macaque and MK start looking for a cure in Wukong’s library, but find exactly no information on the ravine anywhere. They do, however, find information on a forest (that we made up) that will answer any question you ask of it, assuming you can pass its trial. They start banking on this being their best bet to save Wukong, because he’s actively dying. 

And he knows it. 

Macaque knows it too, but he’s Very Deep in denial.

As of the time of writing this, we’re in the middle of a bittersweet fluffy moment where Mac and Wukong are grooming each other and Macaque is talking about the stupid shit they’ll get up to when Wukong gets better. 

The last reply is from Hawk, and Wukong is humoring him asking about where they’ll go as he’s actively passing out and his heartbeat is slowing. 

And that’s as far as we’ve gotten. 

:)

[manstrans]

someone said on that post that trans men’s identities will be seen and respected by the majority

what world are these people living in

people are just outright denying transphobia exists as a whole at this point by acting like only one kind of trans people get it.

i guess any suicidal trans mascs need to man up and not make such a big deal. i guess any of us who went through that were deluding ourselves into thinking that society will reject us and that we may end up abandoned by families. all my family members were quick to get to call me a guy.

none of them ever accused me of saying anything perverted that I never said when I came out to my little cousin. or harassed me with my dead name. told me i was tied to my bones and when they dig me up in the future they would say i am a woman. that would just be mild discomfort though really if that did happen

getting harassed online, being called an ugly woman or a dyke or a deluded little girl (adults or not) all results in said mild discomfort. it is very easily brushed aside at the end of the day. it has no impact on mental health for people to say your top surgery scars make you look like frankenstein’s monster. people do not think a “beautiful woman” is being lost when trans mascs transition. because if people hate women, they would be totally fine with the idea of one “abandoning it”. instead of staying as pretty women that aren’t too much gnc. because a man doesn’t want to be with someone who looks like a lesbian

trans mascs never find struggle trying to get reproductive care because they are not being taken seriously. or ever had cases where doctors were late to diagnosing cancers due to this as well. because putting M down would mean anything to do with differing sex organs from cis men would not be ignored. that this is not the case for every trans person. that we do not have the issue in common of facing transphobia, and in this the shared experience of cissexism as well, in medical spheres

trans mascs never get misdiagnosed with borderline personality disorder when psychs misgender us as woman and think us being trans is the “identity disturbance” symptom. this doesn’t get any resulting impact from ableism, as personality disorders then will get you branded as a doomed person by many psychs.

people never try to fear monger trans mascs into thinking tesosterone is going to turn you into a violent, angry brute. the show The L Word never perpetuated this idea to millions of mostly cis queer women watching.

Boys Don’t Cry isn’t based off a true story. No trans masculine person can ever be rape victims as well. Or if they were, the perpetuator would never bring up the person being trans masculine as a reason.

i never saw terfs talking about correctively raping trans mascs back into lesbians

homophobia is faced by both gay men and lesbians. if anyone said gay men never facehomophobia i would ask them if they actually learned our history. or only snippets

if told that is not the same, I think they should look up Lou Sullivan for the intersection of being trans masc and gay. ask some trans mascs stories about going into bath houses and what happened when accused of being women in there. that this never led to anxiety over a consensual sexual interaction in being accused of rape for “tricking” a gay man into having sex with a “straight woman”? the trans panic defense ever comes up as a known concern in these cases

alright yeah the sarcasm is evident here.

just how do they not realize that implying that trans mascs do not experience transphobia with this is the actual terminally online take? holy shit.

either that or they get to live in a more generally progressive city and not a white suburb in the US. while also being not white. btw you don’t have any reason to think any of these problems may be emphasized if you are brown or black.

any response to this about accusing us of biological essentialism is victim blaming. what is being described are the consequences of biological essentialism that we both endure. we cannot ignore its existence. I wish we could. but transphobes won’t let us. because we challenge the fact and show that it isn’t true

YEAH I just read through this and like. everything in it. people in these echo chambers think a few snappy lines outweigh our lived experiences but it doesn't work that way at all