#(clair voice) almost threw hands with a silver-year-old

[marchsage]

i see the dad lance content and raise you: mentor/older sister figure (auntie) clair

[merci-bitch]

Her Lover

Alma LeFay Peregrine x fem!reader

Warnings: abuse, swearing, death, fluff, angst

Words: 5k

A/N: it’s been a while, hasn’t it. Lol. I’ve been having my exams and shit and I’ve been working on this for the longest time so I’m really sorry if there’s a word that’s not supposed to be there, I don’t really proof read. But hopefully more stuff shall be coming soon. Ta ta! Xx

Jake was surprised, it was all real. What his grandfather had told him, all those stories. They were real. It was unbelievable. At first, when he saw the boomed children's home he didn't really believe it. As that man said at the pub. 3 September 1943. No one survived, but then how come Miss Peregrine's letter had only come 2 years before to his grandfather. How was that even possible?

When we first entered the loop, he of course ran away and nearly got himself killed. Thankfully his new friends saved him from those angry Walsh people. The house looked so different from those ruins he saw. It was actually a very beautiful house. Big and tall and all those flowers growing up on the sides. Completely different.

Miss Peregrine wasn't anything like he'd expected. Not at all, despite from all the stories he'd got from his grandfather. Apparently she was the bird flying above him and his father when they first arrived to Cairnholm. Ever since Jake arrived, he'd notice that on the bird's right hand, her ring finger. There was a small ring with a single diamond. Jake knew it wasn't probably wasn't his thing to ask, but he didn't see anyone else then the people he'd already seen. His grandfather had never really mentioned anything or anyone else then the ones he'd already talked about.

He had helped Emma with the baby squirrel, it was a bit awkward wrapping the rope around her waist. He'd noticed Miss Peregrine's glare, it was uneasy. As if she felt some sort of jealousy? But that was ridiculous. Absurd. Jake had agreed to join them for supper. Emma was helping him in his grandfather's old room. He just couldn't but ask.

"Emma, could I ask you a question?"

"Jake, I told you that there are questions I can't answer." Emma said as she tied his tie.

"I know, but it's just. Does Miss Peregrine love you? Like, that way?"

Emma stilled. Almost uncomfortably.

"Jake. What's got you to even think of such disgusting things?!"

"I'm sorry! It's just, I saw her glare." Jake held his hands up in defeat.

Emma let out a sigh. Looked down before looking up again. "You must understand. Miss Peregrine, well all of us lost someone dear. It's taking her long time to actually get back to who she is. So please, stop asking questions." As she finished speaking the bell rang. They both walked down together and Jake almost sat down on Millard.

"Millard. Go and put some clothes on. Polite persons do not take their supper in the nude."

Jake almost felt sorry for him, he didn't mean to take his place really. He couldn't see him, obviously. He was, well he is invisible. During dinner, he couldn't help but stare at Miss Peregrine's right hand with that ring. Her long slim fingers with those long nails. The ring was silver. The small diamond was pretty. And shiny.

"Claire, why aren't you eating?" Miss Peregrine asked, looking with worry to Claire. Chewing on the piece of food.

"She's embarrassed in front of Jake." Hugh said, leaning over to Claire.

Jake shook his head. "Don't be. Please."

Claire looked over at Miss Peregrine with a small smile and Miss Peregrine sent Claire a wink before turning back to her own food. Claire grabbed the chicken leg and put it behind her head and a few seconds later she put the clean bone back on her plate.

"So Jake, what's your peculiarity?" Horace asked. Leaning over the table a bit to see Jake as he asked.

"Oh, I'm not peculiar." Jake stammered.

Enoch put down his fork and knife and said, "And that, my friends, is why he will not be staying with us. No matter how hard we try to persuade him."

Miss Peregrine spoke up again. Her voice light but firm. "We've spoken about this. Jake is just visiting."

Hugh opened his mouth, "He might want to say."

"Don't you want to stay, Jake?" Olive asked.

"Tonight? Or..-" Jake didn't get a chance to finish of his sentence before Claire irrupted him.

"Forever! You should stay forever." Her smile big.

"Why would he, if he doesn't have to? He can live out there, grow older, have a good time instead." Enoch said. Trying to make a clear point of why he didn't want Jake in the house. Jake could feel Emma slightly lift from her seat despite being strapped down. She was getting uncomfortable.

"He'll leave, just like his grandfather did." With that, Enoch started eating again and Emma got up and practically ran out of the room despite her heavy shoes. Miss Peregrine's call for Emma didn't stop her. As Emma left, a clothed Millard came into the room. Excusing himself. Sitting down and starting to eat his own food.

"Deep breathes Alma, you know how dear Enoch gets with new company."

Miss Peregrine closed her eyes at the voice inside her head. She was right. She slowly got up as the telephone rang. "I think you should all get ready for movie time while I answer that."

"But you always let us stay for it." Claire begged. Miss Peregrine turned around and gave the children a glare that almost scared Jake. She was a strange woman, yes she was. Miss Peregrine stepped out to the hallway, to the ringing telephone. This time, she nearly didn't answer it. Wishing the voice inside her head would come back. Missing the touch of that person with the voice nearly threw her off guard. She nearly kicked herself from going off schedule. Shaking her head, she answered the telephone and went on with the schedule.

The time went on, again. Horace's projected his dreams. One particular dream made Alma tense up. She couldn't watch it. She turned on the lights and heard all the groans from the children. It was almost re-set time. Olive asked Jake to stay and see the re-set. Enoch clearly didn't want him to. Alma felt herself chuckle softly. The arguments between Enoch and re-set. Alma stepped out in her raincoat and put on her gas mask after putting on the music. Run Rabbit Run. She would always sing along to the song-Alma kicked herself mentally again. She stopped her clock, she turned it 24 times to represent the 24 hours of the loop. She took of the gas mask and smiled towards her children.

She said her goodnight to the other children as Emma and Jake made their way out the door. Her smile faded as they disappeared from her view. She closed the door, knowing Emma would lock it. She slowly made her way up the stairs, to the end of the hallway, to her bedroom. She opened the door and walked in and closed the door again and locked it. Leaning against the door and closing her eyes.

"You know me better then I do. Can't seem to keep nothing from you. How you touch my soul from the outside. I still love you even though I'm scared. Learning to be grateful of myself. I wish I could love me like you did, how I wish I could trust myself like you did."

She moved from the door and towards her desk and sat down and started unpinning her hair. Brushing through her hair slowly. That black-blue hair. The little curls. She got undressed and dressed in her lacy nightgown and brushed her teeth and took off the makeup she'd been carrying during the day. She laid down in the cold bed, shivering slightly. Falling asleep after a few minutes.

***

"Clarice! Clarice come on. We have to get back. We can't stay in La Pari forever. We've been gone 7 years too long!" Claire let out a groan and stopped walking. "But Y/N! I love Paris!" Y/N shook her head. Her little sister was definitely a number. "Well, you wrote to Alma we'd be home, so let's go." Clarice didn't move. "I? I didn't write. She's your wife." Y/N felt herself tense up. Oh no. Y/N had forgotten to write, and she'd hopped her darling sister had written.

"When was the last time You wrote back home Clarice." Y/N looking over at her sister, with a glare almost identical to Alma's. Clarice bit her bottom lip. "5 years ago." Y/N felt her head spinning. She sat down and rubbed her forehead. Clarice started laughing. "What's so funny?!" Clarice threw her head back in laughter.

"Oh lord, the handful you will get when you get back. I mean Abe will definitely be in her side." Clarice said while patting her older sister's shoulder. "God. She'd kill me. I swear, I didn't mean to forget and I thought you'd been writing." Clarice shook her head. "But you're right. Let's go home."

***

"Jake, you're back. How wonderful." Miss Peregrine said as she held the Ymbryne tight to her.

"How's it doing?" Jake asked. "Emma said it was an Ymbryne."

"She. Not 'it'. Ymbrynes are always female." Miss Peregrine said as she looked up at Jake. "And Emma was quite correct. This is Miss Avocet." Miss Peregrine continued to give Miss Avocet the medicine.

"Her loop's in Blackpool, England." Jake said. Miss Peregrine slowly turned her head up towards him and saw him holding a piece of paper. "That was a private letter, Jake." She said as she put down the medication.

"Who is Mr. Barron?" Jake asked, slightly raising his voice.

Miss Peregrine's face expression turned blank and her right hand came almost protectively over Miss Avocet.

"Miss Peregrine, if my grandpa was involved with dangerous people. I need to tell the police." Miss Peregrine looked up at Jake again, her brows knitted with confusion.

"Police? Are you implying Abe died an unnatural death?" Her voice going quiet.

"I found him in the woods, with his eyes missing. I'd say that was pretty unnatural." Jake said as he watched Miss Peregrine raise from her chair. Miss Peregrine looked at Jake in disappointment, snatching the letter out of his hands.

"Unless essential, I don't discuss unpleasant matters. An Ymbryne's duty is to protect children, Jake." With that, she left the room, almost in a hurry.

"I'm not a child! He wanted you to tell me everything!" Jake shouted after her. Jake let out a sigh of frustration and walked down the hallway and was stopped when both Enoch and Olive came into his view.

"Oh. How frustrating for you. Between Miss Peregrine's rules and my housemates' little pact not to scare you off, it's like no one's telling you anything." Enoch was sarcastic. Olive stood quietly behind him. Jake leaned forward.

"Why don't you, then? It's not like you want me here."

This time, Olive spoke up.

"Enoch, you can't. You promised." Enoch looked back at Olive before answering.

"Olive's right. I do know someone who can get away with breaking rules though. Want to meet him?" Jake looked a bit uneasy at Enoch before following him up the stairs. Olive behind them.

"Enoch, don't do this. Please!" She grabbed his arm, begging him not to do whatever he was going to do.

"You want to spend time with me and Jake, we can all play together. That's what you said." Enoch said as they reached a door at the end of the hallway. Olive stood in front of them. Not letting them pass through the door.

"Well, here we all are." Enoch said. Olive looked up at him with a bit ready expression. "Move Olive."

"If you're going to be like that, then I don't want to be your friend." With that, Olive left. Sobbing quietly to herself while walking down the hallway.

"Enoch, leave Victor alone. It really upsets Bronwyn." Fiona said as she walked up to Enoch and Jake. Enoch put both his hands on Fiona's shoulders, "Stop fussing, Fiona. Don't you think Jake should meet everybody?" He said while looking over at Jake.

"He's trying to frighten you away, Jake. He's always jealous of Abe. And now he's jealous of you. Come and play with us instead."

Enoch crossed his arms and looked at Jake, waiting for an answer. Jake didn't really know what to say.

"I'd quite like to meet Victor." Jake said after some time. Enoch smiled and ruffed Fiona's hair. Enoch opened the door, letting Jake walk in. "After you."

In the middle of the room there was a bed, covered in thin layers of fabric, and Jake saw Victor, lying there. He slowly walked in, moving with small steps towards the bed.

"Hello, Victor. I'm Jake. I'm sorry to disturb.." Jake looked down at Victor. His eyes were missing.

"Yeah, he can't hear you." Enoch said. Enoch got on his knees and opened Victor's shirt and put the heart he held down into Victor's chest. Jake saw how Victor's chest started to heavy. Almost like a jump scare in movies, Victor sat up and looked over at Jake.

"Hello, Jake. I'm Victor. Do you want to know what killed me?" Almost like a puppet he was. It scared Jake and he ran out of the room, downstairs where Miss Peregrine and the rest of the children were waiting.

"Ah, there you are. Is Enoch with you? It'd time for our daily walk." Miss Peregrine said.

***

Alma walked into the room where Victor lay. Sighing once seeing Victor's covers down. She pulled them up, making sure they covered him and slowly sat down. Noticing the tear falling down his cheek. Softly wiping it away and pulling him up and held him against her chest.

One of the most disappointing things she'd ever done. How she couldn't be able to save Victor, how she'd let her poor child die. She never meant for him to die, she never meant for Bronwyn to lose her brother. Alma felt herself tear up.

"It's alright Alma, you did what you could and for that, Victor will forever be grateful."

She really wanted to believe those words. Oh, how hard life could be. She couldn't let herself to cry. She'd always say it was alright to cry, but Alma just couldn't. She slowly put Victor back in his place and looked at her watch. She had a few minutes before the children would be back, but she had to keep schedule.

Alma walked out of the room, closing the door. Walking down the hallway to the right and then further down that hallway and then into her own bedroom. Closing the door behind her, locking it. Just in case. She quickly walked over to the dressed against the wall, opened a drawer and pulled out a shirt that didn't belong to her.

Sticking her nose deep into the fabric, closing her eyes and breathing in the familiar sent. Holding onto the shirt tightly. Alma felt her eyes sting.

Why did life have to be so cruel? Why couldn't just one person live a life and be happy. Is it only fairytales that get their happy endings and not people in the real world? Was the 'perfect' life all just a big lie that you were told on the television outisde loops? Why couldn't you just live yourself in your dreams? Wouldn't life be so much better if you could? It would save all troubles from people.

Alma slowly sat down on the bed. Still holding the shirt tightly to her. Breathing in the sent again. Letting her eyes roll back for just a second. Accidentally losing herself in the sent. Letting a soft moan escape her mouth which caused her to blush. Hand covering her mouth as she blushed even more.

"My shirt hm?"

Alma turned around with a gasp. No one was there, she let out a sigh. Alma got up again, checked her clock and put the shirt back in the drawer and walked downstairs. Waiting for the children to arrive back home.

***

"Clarice, where was the loop again?"

"You can't be serious. We lived with Alma for years, you're married to her for gods sake!" Clarice sat down in the damp grass, crossing her arms. Letting out a huff.

"Awh, stop acting like a bloody kid! Maybe help me instead of acting like such a bloody moron!" Y/N answered to her sister.

She let out a huff and sat down on a rock. Y/N felt bad. She'd been gone 7 years too long and Alma probably thought she was dead. Just because her little sister didn't write as she used to. Y/N reaches into her pocket and pulled out a few photos. Photos she took, before she left.

Most were of Alma. It was one of the only times she'd let her time be taken from her. She missed the bird.

"Could you stop sobbing and perhaps do something to help? You cant stare at th-hey. Y/N. Was that Abe?"

Y/N looked up and saw nothing. She turned to her sister and hit the back of her head.

"Very funny."

***

The children were packing after they're realisation that they couldn't stay. As Alma had finally gotten the suitcase to close, thanks to the twins, the doorbell rang. How odd. She hadn't expected anyone. Alma walked up towards the door and opened the door and felt her whole body tense.

"Miss Peregrine, what a pleasure to meet you at last!"

Mr. Barron was holding his hand shaped knife against Jake's neck. Alma felt her breathing stop for only a second. What on earth was happening?!

"May we come in?"

Alma took a few steps back, letting him inside the house. Her children standing on the stairs.

"Children! Would you make your way down the stairs, please?" Mr. Barron shouted.

Alma raised her voice. "I give the orders in this house, Mr. Barron." Looking at him sternly.

"Not today. You should know that Jake has served his purpose. If you value his life, I suggest everyone does as they're told. Children!"

Alma raised her finger and shushed him. "No one tells my children what to do!" Alma turned around, a split of disgust in her expression. "Children, come down here, please." Her voice was strong but soft.

The children made their way slowly down the stairs.

"Miss Peregrine-"

"I thought I told you to be quiet." Alma snapped back at him. Giving him one of her famous death glares. She slowly made her way around again to look at her beautiful children. Knowing she might never see them again.

"Children, for Jake's safety, we're going to do what Mr. Barron asks. He wishes to take me with him to his rendezvous in Blackpool. So, for his protection, he'd like me to assume bird form, preferably caged. And he'd like you to make your way into a lockable room, such as the parlour." Alma turned her frame towards the parlour then back to her children before turning around to look at Mr. Barron.

"As he won't release Jake if he fears an attack could be mounted upon him once he loses his leverage. Correct, Mr. Barron?" Alma raised her chin, showing how she awfully despised him. Mr. Barron was at loss of words.

"You're sacrificing yourself and all of us, for Jake?"

Came behind her, Alma turned around and looked at Enoch.

"Me. Barrons travels with a Hollow, Enoch. Once it arrives here, we're all dead." She could almost feels Mr. Barron's wicked grin behind her. Alma saw Horace lean in to whisper something to Enoch but didn't bother to listen. It took everything not to shed a tear. She'd lost everything now. The woman she loved the most, her dear children. Everything.

She moved towards the parlours door and said her goodbye to each child that passed her, ending with a hug from Emma and the twins which made her she'd a tear. Once every child was inside the parlour, she grabbed the door handle to each door and took a deep breath and looked over her children.

"It's been my privilege, to care for you all. Goodbye my children."

Alma closed the doors and turned the lock and turned to face Barron, showing her anger through her tear stained cheeks. Taking steps forward.

"Now let him go."

"Oh, but the fun's just begun Alma." Barron let out a low chuckle.

"How dare you speak my name, filthy bastard." Alma tightened her tone. Growing more impatient by each second that passed.

Barron let out another chuckle, this time of surprise.

"My my, what words those pretty lips let out. Tell me, how's dear old Y/N doing?"

Alma clenched her jaw. Feeling as she might explode.

"How dare you speak her name?! How dare you come here, act like you own everything I have. You took her from me! How dare you mention anything of her's. I know what you did to her family, how her parents practically coward before you. On their knees begging to not die. Letting their dear children's lives pay their depth."

As Alma continued, Barron only chuckled. Jake was confused. Who was Y/N? What did this woman mean to Miss Peregrine?

"Technically I wasn't the one who sold her, her mother was. Her dear parents are still loyal to me as ever. I'd never gotten a chance to meet dear Y/N. So tell me, where is she?"

This time, it was Alma's time to be confused.

"What do you mean by that. No tricks Mr. Barron. I want the honest truth."

As he let Jake go, letting out a groan. "Listen, lady. I'd never meet her. If I had, do you think I'd be asking you? So come now Miss Peregrine. Where is she. Her mommy and daddy just wanna say hello."

Alma felt herself start to tremble. Y/N hadn't been in Barron's possession.

She'd spoken to Jake. Begging him to care of her children before turning into bird form. Flying into the cage. Leaving with Mr. Barron. If her dearest was really alive, she'd never see her again. Nor her beloved children.

***

"Emma, I have a question. Look-I know you don't answer them but it's about something Miss Peregrine said before she turned into a bird. Who's Y/N?"

Emma went quiet for a moment, not really wanting to speak. Jake let out a sigh and continued to talk.

"Mr. Barron said he'd never meet Y/N before. What does this mean-who is she?" Jake looked t Emma who's eyes looked at his. A slight tone of happiness appearing on her face.

"So, that means she could still possibly be alive." Emma's smile got bigger.

"Who is she? Is she another peculiar?" Jake was growing impatient.

Emma sighed. "Alright, if I tell you. Will you stop asking?"

Jake nodded his head and sat down and waited for Emma to speak.

"Y/N came to our home years ago, before Miss Peregrine had made the loop. She came with her sister Clarice. When they came they were both pretty young. I think Clarice was 15 and Y/N perhaps 20. I heard Miss Peregrine talk with them about what had happened to them. It wasn't really, nice."

Emma sat down herself and took a deep breath.

"Mr. Barron came to their house, in the middle of the night and killed their brother, well took his eyes. He was around 8. She talked about how their parents had sold them to Barron for their own safety. But before Barron could touch them they'd ran away. They'd taken the boat and arrived here."

Jake listened as she explained more about Y/Nk's past. But there was just one question bothering him.

"What about the ring on Miss Peregrine's finger?" Jake asked.

"Y/N and Miss Peregrine kinda fell for each other. A few years after the loop was created, they got married. Then again a few years later, perhaps 7 years ago. Both of them left, Y/N and her sister. But after two years they stopped writing back home. We heard nothing from them and since Barron wanted to recreate the experiment Miss Peregrine told you about.”

Jake nodded, shocked. He had nothing against the LGBT community but he’d never thought Miss Peregrine was a lesbian. Perhaps she wasn’t, maybe just fell for the one person she trusted most.

They went on, the plan to save Miss Peregrine.

***

“Clarice, fix it. Please. Something has happened.”

Y/N was panicking. The loop was gone, not a child in sight. Alma wasn’t here either. Clarice had the peculiarity of restoring time, she restored the loop. Made everything go back to normal. The house looked itself again but no child was there. What the hell happened. How long has the house been like this? Clarice was too busy walking to her room.

Y/N looked around, saw suitcases. Were they leaving? But why, and where? It felt strange being back in the house, but with everyone gone. Y/N walked around, touching the walls and everything. Y/N walked upstairs and into the bedroom she once shared with Alma and closed the door behind her. Alma’s perfume hitting her like a smack in the face. The scent of smoke, flowers.

She pulled open the drawer and pulled out one of the dark blue lacy nightgowns and spelled. Alma. Y/N looked out the window. It was dark and it was raining. Y/N loved the rain. She walked over to the window and sat down by the window and opened it to listen to the rain and felt herself drift off into sleep.

***

Alma opened the door and walked in. How in the hell was the house still standing? She hadn’t reset the loop. She was wet and she was tired and drained. She quickly walked into the bathroom connected to her room and took a warm, long and hot shower. She wrapped the towel around herself and stepped out. Looking in the drawer for her nightgown but it wasn’t there. Alma turned her head to the figure she saw sitting by the window and nearly had a heart attack.

She grabbed her pillow and hit Y/N with it multiple times.

“You reckless little-“

“Alma, hey! Stop hitting me!”

“I have every right to be angry at you! I thought you were dead. For 7 years you’ve been gone and then you stop writing?!”

Y/N could see Alma’s cheeks turning red from anger. She stepped forward, grabbing the pillow out of Alma’s hands and kissed her knuckles. Which made Alma shut up.

“Why’d you do that to me, to the children.” Alma’s voice was on breaking point.

Y/N looked up, into those blue eyes. “I never meant to. I forgot to write-“ Alma cut her off with a snort.

“Of course you did.” Alma took the nightgown from Y/N and dropped her towel and put it on. Feeling Y/N’s eyes on her. It made her shiver. Then she felt arms wrapped around her waist and a soft kiss on her right shoulder. “I’ve missed you. Please don’t leave again.” She felt Y/N shake her head and turned around in her arms and kissed her lover on the lips softly. Nearly losing herself in her lover’s lips. Laughing softly after feeling Y/N’s hands tickle her sides.

“I hate you.”

“You love me birdy.”

[dreamescapeswriting]

Break In The New Year ~ MYG [Request]

WORD COUNT: 5.4K

GENRE: Friends to lovers, New Year’s Eve, Non Idol Au, angst with a fluffy ending

PAIRING: Yoongi x Fem!Reader

WARNINGS: Mentions of house being broken into, heartache, and police cells 💕💕 

"I would owe you a big favour, we already went through this. You can hold it over me for the rest of my life." You tugged on Yoongi's arm as you walked through the supermarket together, begging for him to do you yet another huge thing for you. Yoongi had been your roommate since you were in college and you both continued to be roommates even after graduating and getting jobs. Moving in together was the best decision either of you had made since you knew each other for such a long time it made sense.

"You already owe me from the last time I did something for you." You rolled your eyes at him before jumping up to reach for the box of corn flakes that were on the top shelf, always on the top shelve. He was talking about how you'd gotten him to go to a family event with you so you wouldn't be the talk of the party and he would be instead.

"Then I'll owe you double, you don't understand Yoongi-" When he reached up for the box for you you stopped talking and thanked him for it placing the box into your trolley.

"They're like the bitches of Eastwick," He finished off what you were going to say since he'd heard the story about your co-workers a billion times from you. It was the truth though, the three of them were evil, whenever they got together you swore they were planning the end of the world.

"I told you that one already?" You laughed nervously while following along behind him to the next aisle, he was pushing the trolley this week since the week before you had an "incident". Which he brought pleasure in bringing up every time you whined about not getting to push it.

"I still stand by the fact that the trolley rolled on its own." You folded your arms over your chest like a child earning a chuckle to come from Yoongi as he raised his eyebrow at you turning to his side as he picked up some toilet roll for the apartment.

"The trolley, which you were pushing, rolled on its own into a rack of wine with you hanging on the back of it and shouting-" Yoongi stopped still as he lifted up his hands into the air and shook them as if he was trying to do jazz hands.

"Whee look at me, so much fun, so much fun!" He mocked in a high pitch voice to which you threw a roll of kitchen roll at his head bouncing off and ending into the trolley.

"I don't sound like that," You pouted at him walking around to the next aisle when you saw someone from work walking towards you, fortunately for you it was one of the nicer females on your office floor. Always trying to be pleasant with you and everyone around her, even she hated the three bitches of Eastwick on your floor. Everyone hated those three though, you didn't even think your boss liked them if you were being honest.

"Y/n? Hi!" You smiled at her walking with Yoongi as he looked at you with an expression of 'who is it?'.

"Hey Dawn, Dawn this is Yoongi. Yoongi this is Dawn from work. She's one of the IT girls." You smiled at Yoongi to let him know that Dawn was friendly and he reached out his hand to shake hers.

"Nice to meet you, Y/n talks so much about you. Roommates in college, roommates again. You must be very close." Dawn was being friendly with Yoongi so he smiled at her and joked about it with her,

"Very close, I'm secretly blackmailing her to stay with me really." He teased as you walked towards the freezer sections to buy food you would both need at the home.

Once you were out of the supermarket Yoongi looked at you,

"I'll go. But you owe me big. Huge." He told you as you began shutting the boot of his car, turning to look at him you smiled at him innocently. All of this was to get him to come along to the New Year's Eve party that your boss was throwing, it was a huge party that would be thrown on your office floor. They did it every year and every year you were alone which was why you were begging Yoongi to go with you this time.

"I don't like when you smile at me like that, y-you look creepy. Stop it." He begged you but you smiled even wider before wrapping your arms around his neck and giggling like a possessed doll as you tried to get him to do this for you.

"Thank you Yoongi!" You yelled gaining the attention of couples in the parking lot who were all giving you weird looks as Yoongi tried to get away from you trying to pull his body away from yours but you kept your grip on him.

"It's a date-" Yoongi told you before cutting himself off, he looked at you as he began to turn a slight pink colour at the thought of taking you out on a real date.

"I'll be your fake date. Dawn told me how the Bitches of Eastwick all slam you for never having one." His words came out in a stutter but you knew what he was trying to say and do for you so you thanked him. Unwrapping your arms from around his neck and smiling at him,

"You're a lifesaver. You have my soul until you decide to use your favours." You promised him, taking the trolley back over to the trolley bay leaving Yoongi to start up the car trying to calm down his brightening cheeks.

"No funny business either, you have to dress nice that night. It's an office party but everyone's going all out." You told him once you were back in the passenger seat beside him, he knew he'd agreed to this but now he was hearing more about it he wished he hadn't.

"It's a New Years Eve party, it's not as if we need to go all out-" He stopped talking when he saw the sad look on your face, he'd always found it hard saying no to you whenever you gave him that look and you knew that. It was like looking into a puppy's eyes whenever they were begging for food and it made him think of Holy back home. He reached out to cover your eyes with one hand,

"Stop playing that to your advantage, it's not fair. I'm not dressing up in a suit just for a party!"

"I'm dressed in a suit for a party." He grumbled a week later when he was standing in the apartment living room in his tux, it was an all-black piece with a black bow tie to match. He brushed his hands down the fabric as he stared at himself in the huge mirror above your fireplace.

"You look great, shut up." You muttered from the bathroom as you applied the finishing touches to your makeup, you wanted to look nice since there was going to be a photographer on-site snapping pictures of everything. It was true though, Yoongi looked sexy...Not that you would ever tell him that to your face you would be too embarrassed to.

"Right, Bitches of Eastwicks, names!?" You called out as you slipped into the pair of silver high-heeled shoes you'd gotten to go with your dress. This was a test to make sure he could perform well tonight as your fake date.

"Blonde one is Flair, Brunette is Mina and then the one with dyed blue hair is Claire?" He looked over at the bathroom door when he heard it open and his mouth almost dropped to the floor upon seeing you. The red dress you were wearing was a high-low one with lace sleeves just off the shoulder and then the rest of the dress was multi-layered with tulle, and a satin lining.

"What? Does it look bad?" You panicked to yourself, looking down as you ran your hands over the fabric but Yoongi shook his head. He hadn't seen you this dressed up since it was your graduation night and even that was just a pair of jeans and a fancy shirt - which you'd stolen from him.

"You look great...S-Seriously, you look...Wow." He was at a loss for words as he continued to look at you, it was just something you'd picked up in a sale shop. It was almost 50% off so you knew it had to be the dress for tonight, you could never afford the real thing in your lifetime or the next.

"Good...T-That's er...That's great." You both turned tried to ignore the awkward tension that was lingering in the air. The thing was you'd had a crush on Yoongi since you were in your first year at college together but he'd never been interested in you that way before. Deciding to go for other girls around you rather than you so you forced those feelings deep down inside of you. Yoongi, in turn, doing the same thing when he thought you didn't like him either.

"I'll drive," He grabbed his keys from the coffee table in the living room and began walking out towards the driveway.

Neither of you had discussed what this fake date evening was going to entail so when you got to the office Yoongi took over everything acting as though he was your boyfriend. He wrapped his arm around your waist while you did your best to ignore the tingling sensation it sent throughout your body. He kissed your cheek whenever someone would look at you both and spin you around as you walked across the dance floor.

"Let's go get a drink," He whispered to you as he made his way through the crowds of people, all of them dressed up just like the two of you were. Some even more extravagant - as if they were taking it as some kind of competition.

"Y/n?! Is that you?!" Yoongi felt your whole body tense up as soon as someone screamed out your name, all eyes working their way onto the two of you as you stood at the drinks table. Taking in a huge deep breath you prepared yourself for the fakest smile you could manage.

"Flair!" You cried out in almost a higher tone than hers, Yoongi's grip on you tightened as he turned you around to face Flair, from what he'd heard he was expecting someone old and mean looking but that wasn't what he was met with. As soon as he turned to look at the blonde mouth fell open, even more so then when he'd seen you at home. The dress you were wearing was on Flair's body only in black and with more beading, on the top half of the dress, she'd clearly had it altered. Your stomach sank upon the sight of her in it, every cell in your body turning against you and telling you that she looked better in it than you ever would.

"Oh look! We're matching," She said condescendingly as she moved closer to you, one of the worst things about Flair was that she faked her niceness. She would act as though she was your best friend, mimicking her digs at the way you dressed or looked as though they were nothing but playful banter between two friends.

"Oh wait, yours isn't the same. It looks like you got yours at a sale," The tag! You'd completely forgotten to take the tag out of the back of the dress and your heart began to thump against your chest at the thought of people seeing it on you and laughing about it but it was too late.

"Ah, my fault. I forgot to remove that for her when I bought it." You looked at Yoongi with tear-filled eyes mentally thanking him for at least trying to save you from embarrassment, everyone around you was starting to giggle and chuckle amongst themselves.

The tag was removed so Flair moved onto something else to dig at you for as she always did with everyone around her,

"Did you do your makeup? I just love this shade of red you have on your lips," Your hand raised to your lips as you tried to hide it from her, whenever she said she loved something it meant she hated it. You'd worked with her long enough to know exactly what she did and didn't mean when it came to things like this.

"You must be her date, Yoongi was it? Dawn told me all about you." Dawn hid behind her own date as Claire and Mina pushed you to stand behind them while they interrogated Yoongi. Who didn't look scared in the least and was smiling bigger than you'd ever seen him smile around you before. It was just like college all over again when he would find other girls to be with.

There was an hour to go until Midnight, Yoongi was walking over to you after spending most of his night with the bitches of Eastwick all of them laughing so loud you could hear them over the music blasting through the speaker beside your head.

"This is great! I can't believe you think Flair hates you. She loves your dress, hair and makeup tonight. She's even going to take you out for breakfast one day next week." You smiled falsely at Yoongi who was feeding into all of her lies, it happened with every guy who came into contact with Flair. At this point, you were starting to think that maybe she was a witch and could put a spell over anyone she wanted to. Deciding you didn't want to put a damper on his night you played along with it,

"Sounds great, is that for me?" You asked as you pointed at the drink in his hand, he stared down at it before shaking his head at you.

"No, I grabbed it for Flair. She's going to give me a tour of the building-"

"I can do that if you want to see it." You told him as you got up on your feet ready to take him wherever it was he wanted to go but a panicked look spread across Yoongi's face.

"No! Flair said she'll do it. She knows the lay of the land better, she's been here a lot longer than you have Y/n." And just like that, he left you alone by the speaker to overthink everything that was running through your head. Did he forget that he was supposed to be pretending to be your date? Did he forget that Flair was one of the few people you hated in this world? Dawn slowly made her way over to you with a drink in her hand holding it out to you in an offering and sign of peace.

"I have a blabbermouth," She whispered as she slid the drink into your hand, you smiled weakly at her shaking your head. Flair, Claire and Mina had their own way of bringing out that side in people though. People always found themselves spilling secrets or gossiping along with them just so they could feel like they were a part of something with them, just like high school when people would try to fit in.

"It's alright, we've all been there." You whispered to her before downing the drink she'd given you and rose to your feet once again wanting to get out of the room for a while. Clear your head and just get some air,

"Going to go to the bathroom." You told her as you began making your way out of the office and towards the ladies on that floor.

30 Seconds to go until midnight and you were still rushing around to try and find Yoongi, Claire and Mina were both with their dates on the dance floor chanting out the numbers of the count down. Someone claimed to have seen Yoongi up on the roof so you were sprinting up the two flights of stairs that lead to the roof exit, you'd just hit the top flight when you heard the chanting of numbers.

"10!" You were starting to breathe heavily as you continued to go up the final flight,

"4!" You whimpered as you pushed the huge door open until to then hear fireworks exploding, for a second you looked up at the night sky to look at them but your whole world came to a crashing halt when your eye went down to see Yoongi kissing Flair. His arms wrapped around her waist as he pulled her closer to him, her arms wrapped around his neck as she let out a small whine. A noise left your throat as you tried not to cry but the tears were already beginning to stream down your cheeks as you turned to leave before either of them could see you up there. You needed to get out of the building before he could question where you were.

"Fuck," You croaked as you made it into the elevator on the floor where the party was, you smashed against the buttons trying to get it to move faster before sinking onto the floor. Drawing your knees in against your chest as you sobbed into them, wanting nothing more than to get home to your apartment and be left alone to cry the night away. There was nothing reasonably for you to be upset or jealous over but Flair knew what she was doing. She'd heard Yoongi was your date and decided to go against it all and kiss him anyway. Then there was Yoongi. Kissing someone you viewed as your enemy, someone he knew you didn't get along with. Your heart was starting to clench every time you thought about them kissing the scene on the roof was something you were never going to be able to erase from your memory no matter how hard you tried to get it out. Tears continued to roll down your cheeks as you reached the bottom floor, couples were making out everywhere you turned so you walked around with your head hanging low.

The walk home from the building wasn't that far so you didn't have to worry about a long journey but you just worried about how dark and late it was. You'd tried to get a cab but since it was New Year's Eve everything was pretty much booked out leaving you to walk home in the dark.

The whole way home you felt as though you were being watched, someone following behind you in the shadows but you put it down to being paranoid over it being a holiday. But something didn't sit right with you, there was a pit in your stomach but not the same kind you'd gotten when seeing Yoongi with Flair this one was different. It was like you knew there was something wrong but you didn't know what it was or had any idea what it could have been so you just picked up the pace of your walk. Trying not to jump every time a firework would go off or a drunken idiot would scream at you from across the road. You did your best to keep your composure as you reached your street.

The nagging feeling inside of you didn't stop when you got to your apartment but that was because when you reached your place the door was ajar.

"For fuck sake Yoongi," You muttered to yourself as you pushed the door all the way open and kicked off your heels. He was always the last one out of the apartment and always forgot to shut it and lock it properly. Putting you both at risk, tonight you didn't have it in you to ring him and tell him how much he fucked up.

"Fucking idiot-" You stopped whispering to yourself as soon as you walked into the living room, it was now clear what the nagging feeling inside of you was. The apartment was completely trashed, it was clear that someone had broken in and was looking for something. The TV was missing, the coffee table and mirror were completely smashed up along with a bunch of other stuff from the kitchen. Taking out your phone you walked through to the kitchen to see if anything had been taken and a bunch of kitchen appliances were missing. The drawers and cupboards open and everything inside smashed against the floor, you tiptoed back to the living room calling the police trying not to step on any of the glass that was on the floor.

"Hi, I need to report a robbery," You spoke into the phone as you worriedly looked around the living room.

"Can I take your name and address, please? Are you alone in the house or is someone still there?" The thought of whoever had done this to your apartment being inside hadn't crossed your mind until now and your anxiety began to pick up. Your heart raced against your chest as you glanced around not knowing if you were alone, surely if someone was in the house they would have made their presence known by now.

"I don't think so, I-I think they left-" There was a floorboard upstairs that creaked so you began to whisper to the lady on the phone telling her the address and name for the house while you tried to make your way out of the apartment without whoever it was that had broken in finding you.

Before you even made it to the front door someone came up behind you and grabbed you causing you to squeal and drop your phone on the floor. The operator began yelling but you couldn't hear what she was saying,

"LET GO OF ME!" You screamed out kicking back as hard as you could but whoever it was had the strongest grip imaginable on you as you tried to fight them off of you but it was useless.

"Fucking bitch!" A low voice growled as they dropped you onto the living room floor into the pile of glass that was below you after you bit their hand that had been covering your mouth.

"HELP!" You screamed out hoping that one of your neighbours would hear your cries and come to your rescue. You began crawling to get out of the way but the voice boomed out,

"Fucking come here!" Their voice was as deep as thunder which was scary enough, they grabbed onto your ankle as you tried to crawl away from them, you screamed as they dragged you along the class and into their grasp before they hit you over the side of your head-turning everything around you into black.

When you finally came to again there was a police officer calling out your name as they helped you up from the floor,

"You're Y/n, you made the police call?" You glanced at the officer and nodded slowly, your head felt as though it was on fire and the entire room was beginning to spin. A medic on-site began cleaning up your head, applying a cold compress to your skin.

"Yeah I made the call," You stared at his name badge and then back up at him. Officer Jimin. He had blonde hair and was writing down something in a small pad. The medic left you alone and went outside of the apartment.

"We found you on the floor, did the person who did this attack you? Did you get a good look at them?" You shook your head, whining out as you did so not wanting to move your head any more than you had to.

"Headache?" You hummed in response to his question and he sighed not wanting to put you through more any stress than you'd already been through.

"Do you have anyone you can call to go and stay with?" The thought of calling your mother terrified you, she'd told you not to move into the city with Yoongi so calling her and telling her the place was broken into wasn't an option. Yoongi was no doubt busy with Flair so you shook your head softly,

"No, my roommate isn't available." You mumbled as you got up from the sofa and looked around the whole place was a mess, you didn't know if you would be allowed to stay here or not.

"Well we're still doing some investigating but I can take you back to the station and have you in police custody for now. It won't go on your record, just somewhere to keep you warm and safe for the night," You didn't have the energy to fight him on it nor did you have anywhere else to go so you agreed to go with him to the police station. Provided you could grab some clothes to change into first.

The next morning Yoongi finally woke up in Flair's apartment with one of the biggest hangovers he'd ever had to nurse back to health but he bolted out of her place and headed for the nearest shop. Grabbing the largest fizzy drink he could find and began walking back to your apartment, all he wanted to do was get into the apartment and have a bubble bath but when he got to the street people were staring down at his apartment.

"Yoongi dear! You're okay?!" He frowned when one of his neighbours, an elderly lady Mrs Park, asked if he was okay. Of course, he was why wouldn't he be?

"I'm fine, I went to a party. What's going on? Where's Y/n?" The small lady began shaking her head as they watched a police car drive down into the driveway. The whole world seemed to slow down as he saw another cop car making his way onto the scene.

"Not sure, I woke up this morning to sirens and police tape, when I asked what happened they just told me to move." Another van passed by them and this time Yoongi could see the words "crime scene investigation" written across the side of it. His heart sank as he began racing towards the tape, dropping his bag onto the floor as he just sprinted ignoring the police yelling at him to stop.

"You can't be in here," An officer said as he looked up from the floor, Yoongi stared down at where he'd been looking to see blood on the floor. Bits of your dress was shredded everywhere,

"W-What happened?! Where's Y/n?!" His voice was cracking and going up in pitch as he stared around for you, you would have called him if something had happened right?

"Relax. Y/n is fine, she's in police custody while we investigate what happened here. You are the roommate that was busy last night?" The way the officer said that he was "busy" annoyed him but he grit his teeth and nodded along with him not wanting to get into trouble with the officer,

"Yeah, I'm Yoongi. Can I see her?" The officer shook his head,

"I need to ask you some questions before I take you down to see her. Where were you last night?" He rolled his eyes, he knew that it was their job to investigate every leady possible but what was the point in questioning Yoongi when he already had an alibi.

As soon as Yoongi walked into the precinct his heart sank and he began to feel heavy with guilt as he realised none of this would have happened if he had been with you like he was supposed to have been. You were sitting at a desk with a female police officer going over everything that had happened the night before, there was a bruise on your lower eye and a huge band-aid on your forehead that looked as though it needed changing since it had blood on it.

"Y/n!?" He yelled out, you glanced up at him and without smiling, you went back to talking to the police officer in front of you ignoring Yoongi as if he wasn't even there right now you didn't want to look in his direction.

"What happened to her?" Yoongi questioned Jimin as he was walked over to a separate desk.

"She walked home alone, found her apartment broken into and the assailant knocked her out after finding her in the house. You're lucky she isn't hurt worse than she is," Jimin grumbled as he began to write down Yoongi's night, taking note of every name he was giving to him. Yoongi did he best to remember exactly what time he got to Flair's apartment and what time he woke up so he could be in the clear.

"Y/n..." You glanced at Yoongi who was now sitting beside you in one of the staff rooms of the precinct.

"How was the party?" You asked him as you looked into the cup of coffee you were drinking, it tasted worse than anything you could imagine at this moment in time but it was the only coffee they had.

"How's your head? Did you see them?" You shook your head at him as you looked down at your hands, trying not to tear up at the thought of whoever it was being in the same house as you and hurting you.

"I should have been with you, I'm sorry." He dragged you into his arms but you didn't fight it. You rested your head against his chest as you sobbed silently into his ribs, listening to the way his heart thumped against his rib cage.

"I never should have left you alone at the party." Thoughts of where he'd been all night began to creep into your mind and you felt yourself getting jealous all over again but you bit down on your tongue as you fought the urge to say something about Flair.

"D-Did you go to Flair's?" You questioned, pulling away from him and getting up from the small sofa to bin the crappy cup of coffee you were drinking.

"Yeah. Nothing happened." He told you quickly, you looked over your shoulder at him.

"Not that it has anything to do with me. You're an adult Yoongi you can do what you want." You turned back in front of you and began looking into the vending machine for something to eat,

"Y/n..." Yoongi breathed out as he got up from the sofa and made his way over to you, his hand was resting on your waist. Tears welled up in your eyes at the thought of him touching Flair the same way the night before.

"We're not a couple Yoongi, it doesn't matter to me who you go home with or who you make out with on the rooftop of my office building." You turned around to face him to continue your rant when his lips were on yours. Finally, after 5 years in college and then another two in your apartment, he was kissing you deeply. Your arms naturally wrapped around his neck pulling yourself closer to him while he smirked against your lips,

"I went back to her apartment to cool down...I'd been drinking a lot since I wanted to kiss you at midnight...I kissed her on the roof because I was too intoxicated to try and find you." It was a dumb excuse he knew that and he could tell by the look on your face that you were thinking the same thing.

"I never should have left you alone...If you give me another chance and let me take you out on a real date. I'll make it up to you." You bit down on your lip as you stared into his eyes,

"I don't know..." You lied, trailing off your voice as you pretended to think about his office. He growled pulling you closer by the arms wrapped around your waist.

"You still owe me favours, this is me cashing them all in to take you out on a date." He whispered to you as he leant down to kiss your lips again.

"After we get the apartment back...A-and get new locks and a security system." You whispered to him as you kissed his nose, he nodded at you. Leaning forward and leaving a gentle kiss on your lips.

"Deal," He whispered against you lips before kissing you deeply once again.

Tagline: @lyoongx @mitzwinchester @fan-ati--c @rjsmochii​ @kneel-begyourpardon​ @taestannie​ @bisexualmess007​ @innersooya​ @sw33tnight​ @sweeneyblue1​ @jin-from-the-block​

[totally-incorrect-theatre-quotes]

The Dance (fanfic)

Hey! As promised here’s that fanfic I said I would write. It’s a doozy, it’s long, it’s angsty. Grab your tissues. :)

TW: homophobia

Lydia wasn’t expecting much during the fall of her sophomore year. She’d adjusted pretty well to her new school and new life here in Connecticut. She even found a friend group she liked to hang out with during lunches and study halls. She wasn’t popular by any stretch of the imagination but she was content where she was. Flyers for the Home Coming dance were being passed around and posted on the walls of her normally dreary High School. All the underclassmen were chattering away about it while the juniors and seniors laughed about how lame those dances are. Lydia didn’t like parties all that much, the idea of being stuck in a cramped room filled with all her classmates while deafening music was playing wasn’t exactly her idea of fun but it suddenly sounded like the most fun thing in the world when Claire Jones asked her to go to the dance. 

Lydia had had a massive crush on Claire since freshman year, and while they weren’t exactly friends she thought that the two of them had a lot in common despite their very different personalities. Claire was like sunshine, with her blonde hair always done up nice with a scrunchie on her wrist matching her outfit for the day. She on the cheerleading team and in the chorus at the school, but she wasn’t one of those bitchy popular people. She was really down to Earth and even complimented Lydia’s doodles on her history notes. Claire asked her to the dance between classes in the hallways. Lydia had been so shocked that she didn’t even know how to respond but with an excited nod. She left school that day on cloud nine, and skipped into the house to tell everyone the good news. She told Delia and Barbara first, she loved the guys but they didn’t understand this kind of stuff. Her dad wasn’t good with feelings, Adam would probably embarrass her, and Beetlejuice...well he was too everything. 

Without any hesitation, Delia whisked Lydia away to go looking for the perfect dress that would wow Claire at the dance. After an hour or two of trying on dresses, they hadn’t found anything yet that they liked. Delia told her to sit down and that she would be right back. When she returned she had a beautiful navy blue dress with lace sleeves draped in her arms. The bottom till of the dress shimmer with specks of glitter that made it look like she had a galaxy on her skirt. When she tried it on she twirled around in it and felt so beautiful. She didn’t mention it but she was the tears welling up in Delia’s eyes. The two bought the dress, put it in the back of their car, and sat in the parking lot for a little while before heading to their next stop. 

“Do you want to know why I picked out that dress?” Delia asked, Lydia, nodded in response and Delia pulled up a blurry photograph on her phone, “I was looking through some of the old books that you and your dad had laying around and I found this old picture of your mom when she was going to her senior prom. I know the dresses don’t look exactly the same, and I wish she was the one taking you shopping for your first school dance, but I thought you might like to wear something you can remember her with.”

Lydia gazed at the photograph of her mother. She was so pretty, a few years older than she was at the time, and she stood at the top of her staircase wearing a floor-length, lace, navy-blue dress. Her hair was done up in brunette braids and a blue flower sticking out behind her ear. Even if it hadn’t been for the fancy dress and hair she still would have looked beautiful. Her smile, even in picture form, warmed up the room. Lydia was crying now, a stray tear falling on Delia’s phone screen. Without saying a word Delia reached over the console and pulled her into a tight hug, both of them letting the tears roll down their cheeks.

“I know you know I wish my mom were here, but I am really glad that you took me today.”

Delia tilted her head and smiled, “Any time kiddo. I’m always here for you.”

“Thank you, and we really did find a pretty dress. Anything was better than that yellow monstrosity you tried to make me wear last year. I still haven’t forgiven you for that one.”

“Dutifully noted.”

The days leading up to the dance Lydia could hardly contain her excitement. BJ was extremely confused about what had gotten into that kid, she’d been married before it wasn’t like this was her first time in a relationship.  Adam punched him pretty hard for making that remark and told him to just leave Lydia alone about it. Charles tried his best to figure out what his daughter needed but really Delia and Barbara had it all covered. Charles really just needed to drive her there and pick her up after the dance was over. 

The night of Delia offered to do Lydia’s hair but she politely declined. While she didn’t exactly hate her fashion sense, Delia’s hairstyles were another question and she would much prefer Barbara’s minimalist style than the fancy updo that Delia had suggested. She slipped into her dress, letting herself twirl around in it like a Disney princess one more time, before heading downstairs. She rolled her eyes at the scene her family was making, Barbara pretending to faint in Delia’s arms and Adam putting his heart to his chest. When she locked eyes with her father she was he was fighting back tears as he came over, grabbed her hand delicately and lead her down the rest of the stairs. 

“I know you said you didn’t need anything from me but I thought you might like to have this.” He pulled out a little black box from his pocket and handed it to her. She popped it open and saw a stunning silver necklace with a diamond connected to the loop, she looked up at her father and he explained, “I had this made after...after your mother died. It’s the diamond from her engagement ring. Another way you can carry her around with you...always.”

Lydia launched into the tightest hug she thinks she ever gave her father and kissed her on the cheek, “I love it dad. I love you.”

“Aw come on now Lydia. You know I don’t do well with the whole emotions thing...don’t go making me cry now. Besides we’ve got a dance to get you to!”

She said a quick goodbye to everyone and promised to behave, be safe, and text them if anything happened and she wanted to go home early. She laughed at the last one, she didn’t think she’d need that option. She was ready to have the best night of her life with the girl she had been daydreaming about for almost a year now. She took in a deep breath before pushing the doors of the school gym open. Claire texted her and said she would be in a pink dress and sitting at a table towards the center of the gym. When Lydia got there she was smiling so much it hurt her face, but she didn’t care. She walked over to where Claire was standing with what she assumed was a group of her friends, and tapped her on the shoulder, “Hi Claire, You look beautiful!”

“Oh my god, I can’t believe she actually came.” she heard someone whisper behind their hands. Lydia tried her best to ignore it, feeling the smile on her face falter as Claire looked at her expressionless

“I uh, I brought you a corsage. You don’t have to wear it if you don’t want to..my stepmom thought it would be nice to get one for you though.”

More snickers from the now growing crowd closing in on Lydia. She wrung her hands nervously wanting Claire to say something, anything. Lydia had anxiety she reminded herself. The people probably weren’t really laughing at her or circling her, she was just nervous and making more issues for herself. That had to be what was happening because Lydia was going to have a good time that night. She had been so excited, dreaming of this day for months and it was actually happening now. She was at the dance with the girl she compared to sunshine in her dairy, whose eyes were golden like the sun but now when Lydia looked into them they seemed cold, calculated. Lydia clutched the fabric of her dress trying one more time to get some kind of affirmation from Claire that they were okay, “Do you..do you maybe want to go dance? Or we could get drinks. It really doesn’t matter to me.”

“Oh my god Claire does she actually think she’s here with you tonight?” a boy from her grade laughed out loud, “That’s hilarious.”

Lydia felt a knot in her stomach, “Claire? What’s going on. I thought you invited me here. You asked me to go with you...in the hallway after class.”

Suddenly Claire started laughing too, “You honestly thought I’d ask someone like you to go to the dance with me? Sweetie that was a dare. A joke!”

“A joke?” Lydia repeated, holding back a sob

“Yeah, a joke.” Claire picked up a cup from the table and walked menacingly towards Lydia. She backed up but found that she was surrounded when her back hit up against someone taller than her. She felt her heart racing in her chest as she looked desperately around for a way out. She didn’t even care about what was happening she just wanted out of it. 

“Oh my god, she’s like a scared little bunny!” someone laughed

“Why are you doing this? I thought we were friends...I..you asked me-”

“Who in their right mind would want to be friends with a d*ke like you?” She threw the drink back and splashed it on Lydia’s face soaking the front of her dress. She stalked towards her and pushed her down on the ground by her shoulders. Lydia had never felt smaller than she did at that exact moment, the girl she thought she liked standing over her like a menacing God with Lydia sat pathetically on the floor trying to hold back tears. 

“Alright, alright that’s enough!” a teacher’s voice boomed over the crowd, “We said no dance circles at this dance break it up!”

The crowd scattered, and Claire fled before she could get caught. The teacher stopped dead in his tracks when he saw Lydia crumpled on the floor hiccuping back a cry that was desperately trying to break out.

“Hey,” he bent down to her level, “Are you okay? What happened?”

Lydia just shook her head and bolted out from the gym. Her chest felt tight and like she couldn’t breathe. She just kept running and running until her legs wouldn’t go anymore and she slumped up against the brick exterior walls of the school. The only light coming from the street lamps and the marque advertising the homecoming dance. With tears in her eyes, she clutched desperately to her phone trying to think of what she was going to do next. She wanted to go home, lock the doors and be alone for eternity but she didn’t want to call her father. She didn’t want him to see her like this. She knew if she called Delia her dad would come with and she couldn’t deal with their heartbreak right now. Adam and Barbara would be less emotional about it, they’d still be worried about her obviously but they wouldn’t be attacking her with more emotions. They couldn’t leave the house though, they were stuck there. Out of options, scared and alone she whispered, “Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice.”

He appeared before her mostly just confused but when he saw her with tear streaks running down her face and her dress a soaking wet mess he just sat down next to her and let her cry on his shoulder. He didn’t ask what happened, he didn’t pry her for the details, he just sat there and comforted her until she was ready to talk. 

“I don’t know how I could have been so stupid.” Lydia sobbed

“You’re not stupid Lydia, she’s a fucking bitch. I’m a literal demon and I’m not that heartless. I’m not going to tell you that bullshit they always say about bullies “oh they’re insecure and they’re just taking it out on other people” I literally could not care less what that fucker Cathrine-”

“Claire.”

“- has going on, she should deal with her issues herself instead of making your life a living hell.”

“I just can’t believe how powerless she made me feel. BJ, I was so happy before tonight, everything felt like it was falling into place even with mom gone, but now I just I don’t know anymore.” she started crying again, “Every time I feel like I’m finally doing okay someone goes and ruins it.”

He rubbed her shoulder lovingly as a brother would, “I’m really sorry Lyds.”

“I thought she liked me.” she sobbed, “That’s the worst part about it. I thought for once somebody my age actually liked me for who I was. She lied to me for weeks! She humiliated me in front of everyone. I don’t know how I’m going to go to school on Monday and look anyone in the eyes. I feel like I’m broken.”

“Here, come with me I want to show you something.” BJ stood up and picked Lydia up under her arms. She scowled at him because she knew he knew how much she hated him flying her his way, “I know, I know. It’s just for a little bit.”

“Where are we going?”

BJ set her down in the grass of someone’s yard and motioned for her to be quiet.

“Beetlejuice where are we?”

“Listen kiddo,  Time heals all wounds.” he bent down and picked up a large rock from the yard and chucked it as hard as he could towards the house. The shattering of glass filled the night sky and Lydia held her hand to her mouth. Beetlejuice turned back around to her with a big grin, “But it won’t fix this bitch’s window. Let’s bounce.” 

He picked Lydia up again and flew them both away before the Jones’ could come outside and investigate

“Was that..?”

“Claire’s house, yup.”

“And we just broke her bedroom window?”

“Absolutely shattered it.” He brought her back to the school, the very spot where they had been sitting no less than five minutes ago, and sat her back down on the concrete, “Now you’re gonna call Delia or your dad and have them come to pick you up. But you’re not gonna come right home okay? You can mope around tomorrow morning but tonight don’t be alone. Go see a movie with them, go get icecream. I don’t fucking care, but just don’t let it bring you down anymore tonight okay? Do you promise?”

Lydia nodded, her eyes still puffy and red from all the crying but there was a hint of a smile peaking out, “I promise.”

“See you around Scarecrow.”

Lydia did what Beetlejuice suggested, she anxiously clutched to her phone as it rang waiting for one of them to pick up. She noticed the confusion in their voices immediately, because even though it felt like this had been hours it had really only be about forty-five minutes. All the feelings started bubbling up again and she whimpered a “Come pick me up.” Within ten minutes they were at the doors of the school where Lydia was still sitting alone on the curb. She stood up and haphazardly walked over, opened the car door and slide in. Her father was driving and Delia was in the front seat, both were looking back at her with a mix of pity and concern. 

“You’re dress…” Charles commented and she just gave a sad nod

“Did you bring me a change of clothes?” 

Delia handed a bag back to her with a hoodie and pair of jeans neatly packed in. She quickly changed in the car trying not to meet their sad gaze. Without wanting to get into the details right now she swallowed the lump in her throat and said, “Let’s go get ice cream.”

They went to a little corner shop near their house. Lydia had taken Skye there a few times when she was babysitting her, even though her parents think the girl scout is already too hyper. Lydia didn’t really like ice cream all that much, but Beetlejuice was right anything was better than being alone. She went up to the counter to order a cone when she saw someone she recognized from school wearing the tacky shop uniform. She had fourth period chemitry with her, but they didn’t sit anywhere near each other so they didn’t talk much. Her name was Wendy, Lydia thought.

“You skipped out on the dance too?” Lydia asked in a joking manner

“Yeah, I figured it would be a slow night at work anyway and I could make some extra cash. Forgot most of my paycheck comes from tips though, and its been pretty dead.” she gestured to the empty store, “You three are the first customers I’ve had in like two hours.”

“God, you must be so bored.”

“Yeah, I was.” she polished a glass ice cream dish with a rag, “So what can I get for ya?”

Lydia ordered for all three of them, the total was only seven dollars but she handed Wendy a twenty and told her to keep the change. She was sure her father wouldn’t mind and even if he did she’d pay him back later on. Wendy brought their treats over the three of them spent the next hour just talking and joking. Nobody bringing up the dance the whole time, when they were finished Lydia brought their dishes up to the counter so Wendy didn’t have to walk all the way over. Wendy smiled thankfully and handed Lydia a folded up napkin. Lydia started at it dumbfoundedly and put it in her pocket wishing a bashful goodnight to the icecream clerk. 

Back at home and through many tears and hugs, Lydia explained to the whole family what happened. Beetlejuice absently mindedly filing his nails when Charles got a call asking if Lydia knew anything about the Jones house being vandalized. Charles cursed them out saying Lydia was sitting outside the whole time. Lydia hid a smirk behind her hands and winked at Beetlejuice. For the rest of the night, they all crammed into the attic to watch cheesy movies that Lydia loved. By around 11pm her father and Delia were off to bed and Lydia was laying on Barbara’s lap while they played lovingly with her hair. As if a shock of realization struck her she scrambled to pull the napkin out of her hoodie pocket, flicked on the lap, and unfolded it. 

Inside was a ten-digit phone number proceeded by a message written in Wendy’s dainty handwriting “You’re cute” with a little heart drawn after the phrase. 

She felt her cheeks redden and Barbara squealed excitedly for her pseudo-daughter. She wasn’t ready to jump headfirst into an attempt at dating just yet, but something about Wendy seemed right. She would text her the next morning, but for now, they would just be friends. If Wendy was really thinking about her she’d be willing to wait a little bit. Suddenly though she didn’t feel the loneliness she had been dreading come Monday morning

The night Lydia fell asleep nestled in Barbara’s arms, her mother’s necklace still around her neck and while her heart was still hurting from what happened that night she didn’t feel alone anymore. 

[coleisunderrated]

Reunion

Happy New Year! As promised, here’s the sequel to the Christmas story! I hope you like it & may this new decade not be as fucked up.

Countless years have passed but Cole never forgot that poor match seller and the one match he bought was the only proof that he ever existed. At least that’s what everyone thought.

Just outside the village of Terra, there was a small mound and over the years, the villagers forgot why it was there but accepted it as part of their reality. But Cole never forgot. Every Christmas, he would bring a bouquet of flowers and a slice of cake to the seemingly odd location. Over the years, he tended to the earth and the mound became the only place near Terra where the snowdrop flowers grow.

As time moved forward, Cole adopted numerous children who would’ve had nowhere to go. He wasn’t able to give the match seller the life he deserved but he won’t let anyone else suffer the same fate. He loved and treated all these children as if they were his by blood and eventually, they grew up and had children of their own and so forth. They were the only ones besides Cole who knew the significance of that little mound. Underneath the bed of white flowers, the match seller laid in eternal rest, free from all the pain and suffering he faced in life. His sad story was passed down from Cole to his children and now, only the family knew he was a real person who came to this village and found peace in death. The family will now pass down the tale of the poor match seller through the generations so he will never be forgotten.

Now Cole was reaching the end of his life when a new year was about to begin.

Cole didn’t want his funeral to a huge event. He only had one request he bestowed upon his loved ones.

“I ask for nothing...” His feeble voice came out as nothing more than a whisper, “Except... for one final request...”

“What is it?” Jake, one of his now grown sons, asked with eyes shimmering with tears that were increasingly difficult to restrain.

“The mound of snowdrop flowers... I only wish to rest there...”

Knowing what their father really meant, his children were more than willing to oblige though it didn’t ease the pain of having to see him leave this world.

Cole turned his gaze towards the match by his bed.

It is time.

Cole grabbed the tiny stick and stroked the fuel-laden tip against the surface of the nightstand but alas, he was too weak to do it.

“Are you sure you want to do this?” Gene placed his hand over his father’s, not wanting him to exhaust himself in the end.

The dying man simply nodded. His son swiped the match and laid it upon the tiny tray so Cole and see the flame the match seller must’ve seen during his final moments.

“...Warm...” Cole could feel the heat radiating from the tiny flame. He wondered what the match seller saw when he lit those matches all those years ago. Even now, he still remembered that smile. He could still see it clearly in his memories where it lived on and now, he will also be remembered in the memories of his children and their kin.

Cole turned his weary eyes to his family, understanding how heartbroken they are to see him go. He didn’t want to leave them only with sadness. For him, life was worth living because of them and he wanted them to know that. He wanted them to know how important they were to him.

“...My children... It is time for me to go... You have all made me happy... I won’t forget you... and... I love you all...” Cole uttered his final words and looked back at the little match. The tiny bit of warmth grew until it enveloped his whole body while the flame diminished. The moment the flame went out and a new year began, Cole closed his eyes.

Moments passed and the old man felt nothing.

Until now.

Suddenly, Cole felt... rejuvenated.

He hasn’t felt this sort of energy coursing through his body in years. He can’t even bring himself to care that this surge of stamina literally came from out of nowhere. He opened his eyes and sat straight up from his bed, something he couldn’t do without struggling in the last few years. Even more surprising was that he was able to get off the bed and stand tall. He would’ve been elated if he hadn’t heard the heart-wrenching wails behind him.

He saw his children and their families crying in terrible anguish like nothing he had ever seen before. His parental instincts were as keen as ever and all he wanted to do was comfort them.

“Shhh. Don’t cry. I’m here.” Cole raised a hand to stroke Claire’s hair only to pause at the sight of it. His hand bore no wrinkles or blotches and his fingers strong and healthy, not at all like the literal skin and bones they were moments ago. Next, thick ebony bangs obstructed the edge of his view, suggesting his thin grey hair regained the midnight hue it had once lost. Even his voice sounded different. It never wavered and was robust with youthful vitality. If he could see himself, he would see that he regained his youthful appearance on that fateful Christmas day. Cole wasn’t sure how to handle these changes and then he saw his old motionless body lying on the bed.

It immediately dawned on Cole what just happened.

He died.

Cole never imagined death would be like this. He didn’t feel anything until this moment. Everyone talked about how terrifying it must be but he felt... free. He also felt a comforting warmth coming from behind him, the kind one would expect from someone dear who have waited for them.

Indeed, there was someone waiting for him.

Cole turned around and walked out the door of his home and instead of the snow-covered streets of Terra, he saw a face he almost failed to recognize but it’s impossible to forget when he spent his whole life keeping this person’s memory alive.

It was the match seller!

Cole couldn’t believe his eyes but the match seller now stood before him in his true splendor. He was still pale but nothing like the pitiful skin and bones he was in the mortal realm. Fair hair of gold and silver spun together crowned his gentle face as pure as freshly fallen snow. Peering from pristine white were eyes in an enchanting icy blue that left Cole mesmerized. The match seller stood tall and beautiful and looked very much like the angel he now was.

Cole raised his hand to reach out to the match seller, silently hoping this was real. Fear still dwelt in his heart and he tried to tell himself this was some kind of illusion but the match seller covered his dark hand in his. He didn’t say a word because the beautiful smile on his face said more than any words could. And Cole can feel him.

After so many years, he fulfilled his promise.

“...I... I finally found you...!”

Cole was overcome with joy and freed his tears from all restraint and let them run down his face. Without any care in the world, he threw himself at the match seller and held him tight in his strong embrace. His body that felt so cold when he found him that fateful day was now warm. It felt so real he didn’t want to let go. He can feel him, from the soft, fine clothes, to his face buried upon his shoulder, to the wetness soaking onto his body. The match seller stepped back so his icy blue eyes meet with earthy green. He wept but there were no traces of sadness in his tears or his smile.

“I’ve also waited so long for this day to come.” The match seller spoke with a voice smoother than the finest velvet.

“You’ve been waiting for me for all these years?”

“Yes, and I’m so happy you never forgot me.”

“How could I forget after the promise I made?”

Cole and the match seller embraced again, now knowing they will never part again. He was also happy to be with him again, so much so all he wanted to do was dance and he may have found the perfect partner.

“You mind if I share this dance with you?” Cole held the match seller’s hand in his as an invitation.

“I would love to.” The match seller graciously accepted his offer.

Never letting each other go, the two young men danced in perfect harmony. Cole was always a good dancer and even now, never forgot the steps to all the dances he have performed in life and the match seller’s moves were graceful and elegant. They were perfect for each other.

Then Cole remembered when he wished upon that shooting star to get the match seller’s name. Now that they will never part, this opportunity couldn’t be any more perfect.

“I’m Cole.”

“My name is Zane.”

“Zane? That name... It suits you... Zane.”

“And I can say the same for you... Cole.”

Cole and Zane, after having finally found each other, danced towards the heavens where they now dwell together in eternal happiness.

[amercsmemoirs]

The Handful and The Healer

Chapter 1: The Fateful Encounter 

AO3

Anders checked the time. 5:03am. Time to check on his newest patient. His ID said Damien Amell, and he was rushed in with alcohol poisoning. Anders pumped his stomach and got him an IV and, after some pain killers, went to sleep. Anders hadn't had much time to talk to him, but on a Wednesday night, there weren't that many people who needed emergency care.

Anders picked up the clipboard on the end of Damien's bed and examined his sleeping patient. Damien's face scrunched and he groaned. He blinked, and his eyes opened and - wow. Grey eyes. Anders had never met anyone with grey eyes; the few born with it typically develop some pigment as a toddler.

Anders was snapped from his train of thought when Damien started coughing. Anders looked over and Damien was sitting upright, hand at his throat.

"Side effect of the stomach pumping, unfortunately," Anders explained. "It's going to be a little hard for you to talk for a while."

"Heh, no kidding," Damien said. His voice was raspy and hoarse, and it probably hurt to even say that, but he still had a weak smile.

"How are you feeling? One word answers are fine," Anders added quickly.

"Hm. Better than yesterday," Damien croaked. "You sure did look surprised when you saw me wake up, doc. Was I that bad?"

"No - And you can call me Anders. You’re just awake earlier than I expected you’d be."

Damien’s face broke out in a grin.

"Heh, thanks. This isn’t my first rodeo, you know.” Then he coughed.

At that, Anders chuckled. His patient was resilient, he’ll give him that much.

"So, was last night a special occasion?" Anders asked.

Damien's head tilted in confusion. Anders's brows furrowed. Maybe he should rephrase the question?

"You know... the binge drinking?" Anders motioned to the hospital bed Damien was laying in.

Damien looked down at the bed and then realization struck.

"Oh! Hah, no, just a regular Wednesday night," Damien answered with a grin. "What, are you new here?"

Anders was completely baffled. How was he the one getting such a I-can't-believe-you-didn't-know-this look from someone binge drinking on a Wednesday night?

"I, uh ... I just transferred here last week from Fereldan. So yeah, I guess you can say I'm new."

Damien's face broke out in a grin. "Welcome to Kirkwall! You seem like a handsome, capable doctor. Why do you work at the smallest hospital in Low Town?"

Anders blinked. Was his patient ... hitting on him?

Damien's toothy grin really made Anders noticed his well-defined cheekbones, and his white teeth really shone next to his dark skin. Huh.

"Oh you know, the old story of med school debts, constant failure, and avoiding the problem. Kirkwall's Lowtown seemed a good place to start over."

Damien's expression darkened as he nodded solemnly. Like he understood where Anders was coming from.

"Where did you go to medical school?"

"Oh! Uh, I didn't. My older brother - he just graduated a few years ago."

"Does he work here?" Anders hadn't seen anyone who looked anything like Damien, but it's possible they just worked opposite shifts.

"Oh, no, he's one of those fancy doctors at that Amell Hospital in High Town," Damien responded casually. But also like he was surprised Anders didn't know that, either. "He's - oh, he's here."

Anders turned around and saw a tall man with shoulder length dreads making a beeline straight towards them. And he was tall. 6'4'' maybe? He probably towered over everyone. Broad shouldered, muscular - he was a doctor? That's insane -

Damien grunted as he threw his legs over the edge of his bed.

"Hey, you shouldn't be moving yet -"

"Damien!"

The man reached them and man, was he tall. And big. And looked incredibly haggard. Bags under his eyes, premature wrinkles. When was the last time this man slept?

The tired looking man pushed up the sleeves of his button up shirt as he pushed past Anders to examine his brother.

"Hey Zeke," Damien said as 'Zeke' turned his face back and forth.

"What's your temperature?," he asked, forgoing a greeting.

"Haven't had the chance to ask." Damien looked a little amused.

"Blood pressure? Last night's blood-alcohol content?"

"I'm pretty sure a doctor would know better than I would. Just ask Anders."

"Damien, please. At least call him 'Doctor'," 'Zeke' said, exasperated.

"Actually, I'm an EMT," Anders interrupted, finally finding his voice.

At that Zeke finally turned to him. It just dawned on him that he probably didn't even see him when he rushed to his brother. He looked him up and down, as if he was suddenly judging him.

"Hello Zeke," Anders began nervously. Damien's eyebrows raised. "I'm Anders. He doesn't have to call me 'doctor'," he added, hand stretched out. "Just my top notch, friendly bedside manner."

"He doesn't have to call you 'doctor'," Zeke agreed, rather coldly. "You aren't one. And it's Ezekiel."

Ouch. Anders lowered his hand.

"Hey, Zeke take it easy - " Damien hopped off the bed - well, less of a hop and more of a plop. He was almost as tall as his brother! And they both were taller than he was. Anders was already almost 6’ -

"We're leaving, Damien.”

As Ezekiel strided past Anders, Anders thought of saying a goodbye - but then thought better of it when he caught a glimpse of Ezekiel’s glower. Damien took two steps after Ezekiel and stopped in front of Anders.

“Yeah … He doesn’t really like it when people call him ‘Zeke’. Sibling privilege, unfair, I know,” Damien mused, patting Anders’s shoulder. This close, Anders could see small, silver lines on his face, marking old scars.

Then Damien winked. “Don’t worry, Anders, you’ll be seeing plenty of me. So you’ll be able to get to know Ezekiel better too! Works out for everyone.”

“Hah. Not too often, I hope?” Anders asked. He wouldn’t mind seeing those grey eyes outside the hospital.

Damien gasped, rather dramatically, and gripped his chest. “Anders! Don’t tell me you’re already tired of me!”

Anders laughed, but before he could get a response out, Ezekiel called for his brother from down the hallway. Damien said his goodbyes and followed his brother out of the hospital. The pair got stares from nurses, doctors, patients - literally everyone they passed on the way out. Ezekiel was cold, but he very clearly dropped everything as soon as he’d heard about his brother. And his brother, Damien … obviously a wild card. Anders felt like Damien walked away knowing more about him than the other way around. But, as extreme as he seemed, he still felt warm and friendly. What an interesting pair.

*~*~

A few hours later, Anders was finishing up his paperwork for the day in the hospital lab. He usually tried to stay out of the lab, but it was usually quieter there than anywhere else. And only doctors had offices. His eyes glanced over his patient list and his eyes caught the name Damien Amell. Why did ‘Amell’ sound so familiar?

“Hey, Bethany,” Anders started. Bethany Hawke was a new intern, fresh out of med school, aspiring to be a doctor. Apparently, she’d shown promise, as Chief of Medicine Orsino had pointed her out to Anders several times since he’s been at the hospital. Anders had to admit, Bethany was quick witted, completed all of her paperwork on time, and had excellent bedside manners. He hadn’t heard a single negative thing about her, and she’d been at this hospital for a few months now.

“Yeah, Anders?” Bethany’s voice rang up from the other side of the desk, behind a stack of papers. The lab wasn’t huge; relatively small for the amount of work they had to get done there, but they had as much equipment as they could fit there. Bethany learned to work around it all pretty quickly, and became pretty adept at stacking what she needed very high.

“What do you know about the ‘Amell’ family?”

“Amell?” She popped her head out from behind the stack and looked over at him. Her dark brown curls bounced as she got up and walked over to him.

“They’re my cousins,” she stated plainly.

“What?” Anders scanned her hazel eyes, trying to see if she was bluffing - but no, people as good as Bethany didn’t bluff.

“Yeah, my mom’s sister and her kids. Ezekiel, Damien, and Claire. Ooh, who did you meet?” She peeked over his shoulder at his paperwork.

“Damien Amell,” Anders answered for her. “And Ezekiel came to pick him up.”

“Oh you met Damien and Zeke!” Bethany exclaimed. Apparently, ‘Zeke’ was okay for siblings and cousins. Anders wondered if Damien knew. “Yeah, Damien is here a lot. It’s pretty much the only way to get Zeke to leave the hospital.”

“What hospital? Damien told me he was a doctor, but I don’t remember which one.”

“Are you kidding?” Bethany looked him up and down, an incredulous tone in her voice. Why did everyone in this family do that to him? “Ezekiel is the chief physician at the Amell Hospital. It’s the biggest and oldest hospital in Kirkwall.”

Now that was something Anders should have known. Maker, the Amell Hospital was huge. And cutthroat. Anders would be lucky to even get an interview. And yet, he did not envy Ezekiel. Even being born into the family, maybe even especially, getting the Chief of Medicine position was not going to be easy. And he still dropped everything to pick up his brother on the other side of town?

“That’s crazy,” Anders started, barely able to wrap his head around this new information. “Why is Damien so … out of control if he’s the son of the Revka Amell? How is he in and out of a rival hospital on a regular basis? Why is Ezekiel risking his position at the most prestigious hospital in the Free Marches to pick up his brother from a hospital? And why aren’t you working at your cousin’s hospital?”

Bethany laughed, her brown skin wrinkling at her eyes. Even her laugh was light and airy.

“Well, Damien has already established with Auntie Rev that he’s not going to be a doctor, and she’s already publicly disowned him. And I would barely call this place a ‘rival hospital.’ Ezekiel spends almost every day of the week in the hospital, doing Auntie Rev’s bidding so he can take over the hospital. So he can spare a day or two to spend with family. And me, I just like helping people. Amell Hospital doctors are a little too … ‘out for themselves’ for me. Except for Zeke, of course,” she added.

That gave Anders pause. That family was so complex, with so many different pieces to the puzzle. Oh, Maker. What had Anders learned?

“Why all the questions, hm? Interested in one of them?” Bethany teased. And she didn’t even sound malicious.

“Huh?” The question caught him off guard. Interested? In whom, exactly?

“Honestly, nearly everyone here wants to get Zeke, somehow.” Bethany seemed to shudder at the thought. “Don’t feel bad about it, but you’d have a long line of doctors and nurses to get through to get to him.” Another laugh.

“No, I’m not interested in Ezekiel, I was just - curious. There’s so much more going on than I’d thought.”

None of that was a lie, really. He just didn’t feel like it was the whole truth for some reason. Not that it mattered; the work he had was more important that this dysfunctional family.

“That’s fair. They are a bit of a mess.” She grinned a little sheepishly. “Well, I’m gonna finish my lab work, unless you had more questions about my cousins?”

Anders chuckled. “No, no. Sorry for taking up so much of your time.”

“No worries!”

She returned to her side of the desk and disappeared behind the stack of papers. He decided to return to his paperwork, as well. Damien Amell. Huh. Well, he’d rather not gonna worry about it right now. If he runs into him again, he’ll consider giving the Amells a second thought.

*~*~

Anders had about a week of normal, adrenaline rushing EMT work before Damien showed up again.

Over the weekend, the work picked up of course; bar fights, car accidents, self-repair mishaps. Nothing out of the ordinary for Kirkwall. He’d spent a few days recuperating at home with his new kitten, Ser-Pounce-A-Lot, and tending to the herb garden he’d set up in his kitchen. He was renting a small apartment in Lowtown, the most reasonable space he could think of given his workplace and his salary, and there wasn’t much room for greenery. However, modern inventions had created things like hanging pot racks and window sills, so Anders made do with what he had.

Then, Thursday night around 7:50pm, Anders was paged to go down to the ER to patch up a street market brawl patient. Apparently, the patient was jumped by four other men, all of whom were in surgery or getting stitches, but they just needed a few wounds sewed up. In hindsight, Anders felt like he really shouldn’t have been as surprised as he was to see Damien in the hospital bed. And to see that he was chatting with an elven nurse he seemed to know really well.

“You really didn’t need to involve yourself, you know,” she was saying as she wiped the blood off his face.

Damien winced. “They were giving Isabela a hard time! And they were drunk at like, 5 in the afternoon!”

The nurse - Anders recognized her as Velanna Ilshae - shook her head. “It was seven in the evening -” Damien protested. “And Isabela can handle herself. You and Carver got too involved.”

Damien looked fake appalled. “And what kind of gentleman would I be if I allowed a lady to be verbally accosted on my watch?”

Velanna stared at him for a few seconds and then smacked his nose.

“Hey!” Damien rubbed his nose and turned to see Anders at his bed. “Anders!” Damien grinned at him, then winced - Anders could tell that probably wasn’t the best idea. There were cuts on his cheeks, near his jawline - likely from multiple rings - and bruises up and down his arms. Whoever he’d fought against had to have been shorter than him. But realistically, who wasn’t? Anders wouldn’t be surprised if he had a fractured rib, honestly.

“Hello again, Damien.” Anders couldn’t help but smile just a little.

“Anders, please talk to Nurse Ilshae about her bedside manners. She just assaulted a bedridden patient!”

Velanna and Anders made eye contact and her expression completely gave off the idea that she would not care about what he had to say about that. Better to leave it alone.

“I can take it from here, Velanna,” he said instead.

She nodded and put the gauze down. Damien waved goodbye as she went to check on another patient.

“So is this a typical Thursday night?” Anders asked as he settled in Velanna’s spot. Those cuts were going to need cleaning and stitches.

“Hah!” Damien laughed, quite cheerfully actually, and then winced again. “Ow! Uh, no. While I do like to keep things interesting, this was more of a night out with friends after work.”

“That’s not very reassuring.” Anders finished cleaning Damien’s face and picked up the butterfly stitches.

Ander would have to get up close and personal to fix up Damien’s face. Time to put that top notch bedside manner to work.

“So, I met your cousin Bethany last week. Well, I’d met her before but I didn’t know she was your cousin. Your families are pretty well established here.”

Damien nodded instead of responding. He was either not good with needles or he knew the routine when someone is sticking his face back together. Probably both.

As Anders finished, he saw Damien’s hand reach up towards his face. Anders suddenly understood how Velanna got comfortable with smacking him.

“Don’t touch.”

Damien’s hand lowered quickly and Anders moved to stitch up the other side.

“But, you wouldn’t know how well established you and Bethany are just by looking at you. You’re both incredibly humble.”

Damien stifled a chuckle. Anders finished the other cheek and wiped the remaining blood off his patients face.

“So, where do you work?”

“The Bone Pit Construction Company,” Damien responded with a grin.

“The - The old mining facility?”

“Hah, yeah, crazy name right? Apparently, it decided to go into construction,” Damien explained. “The owner just didn’t feel like changing the name, I guess?”

“Huh. Well, I’m not too confident about you working in a construction zone with your injuries. I can write you a doctor’s note to get out of work for a few days.”

Damien shook his head. “No, don’t worry about it. I own the place, so I pretty much just bark orders.”

“Aren’t you a little young to own a construction company?”

Anders knew from his ID that he was only 24. Two years younger than Anders and yet so much taller.

“You’re telling me. But, you do a few favors for the owner, clean up some messes, uncover a few murder mysteries, and suddenly they just want nothing to do with the place. So it’s mine now, I guess.” Damien shrugged, then grabbed his side.

That didn’t sound right to Anders, but he didn’t know enough business ownership laws to argue.

“Sure. Alright take a deep breath for me.”

Anders put his stethoscope on and listened to Damien’s breathing. Nothing sounded out of the ordinary, though his heart rate was a little faster than normal.

“Are you feeling alright?” Anders asked.

“Yeah? I mean, relatively speaking. Could be better, could be worse.”

Damien sounded pretty calm.

“It’s just, your heartbeat is a little fast.”

“Oh! Uh, really? That’s, uh, strange, I feel fine. Hey, why were you using a needle earlier? You’re an EMT right? I thought they couldn’t do anything that breaks the skin.”

Was he changing the subject? Anders really didn’t know him well enough to tell if this was him being embarrassed or nervous or if he was just like that.

“Don’t tell me I make you nervous, Damien,” Anders teased. “This is a small hospital and since all of our doctors are taking care of their patients or the men you beat up, I can bend the rules a little.”

“Hm, you should have seen Carver,” Damien said. “He got away without a scratch. He’s Bethany’s twin, by the way.” Anders’s brows shot up. “Yeah, I figured you didn’t know.” Damien grinned yet again.

“Are there any other family members I should know about?” Anders couldn’t keep the exasperation out of his voice, but Maker, did Damien have a lot of relatives.

Damien laughed heartily - and then groaned in pain. Yeah, probably a bruised rib. “Uh, let’s see - Zeke, me, and Claire. And Bethany and Carver have two older sisters, Amber and Alexis. But uh, yeah, that’s it, I’m pretty sure. Do you not have siblings?”

Anders was taken aback by the question. It wasn’t out of line or anything, but Damien’s voice suddenly carried interest and concern. It was unexpected.

“No, I’m, uh, an only child. My parents passed away about a year ago. It’s actually why I was gone for a while.”

“Oh - And I kept making jokes. Sorry - well, sorry for your loss.”

Damien’s voice dropped a little and he looked so concerned and why was Anders even telling him this?

“Don’t worry about it. We weren’t that close. They weren’t too fond of me after I dropped out of med school.”

There was also the whole, preferred-sleeping-with-men thing, but Anders didn’t feel compelled to share that with this near stranger. But then Damien nodded like he understood.

“Yeah that’ll make someone’s parents disown them if they aren’t too careful.”

“Speaking from experience?” Anders asked.

“No, not uh, mine. Zeke went through a lot with Revka.”

“Revka.” Not “mom.”

“Well, I do not envy Ezekiel’s position.” Anders picked up Damien’s patient clipboard and started writing. “You seem fine, other than needing stitches, and your rib is likely just bruised. Nothing’s been punctured or broken, but you should still get some anti-inflammatory medication and keep your side iced for a few days. You should be fine. Also, here’s a doctor’s note anyway,” Anders added, handing him the paper. “You know, just in case you’d like to take a few days from your highly exciting lifestyle.”

Damien chuckled. “Thanks, Anders. I’ll definitely consider that.”

“So is your brother picking you up? I figured he’d show by now.”

If Anders didn’t know any better, he would have sworn Damien’s face fell for the briefest moment.

“Who knows. Maybe they told him it was just a fist fight and I wasn’t dying this time,” he responded casually.

“That would make sense -”

“Nevermind, there he is.”

Damien motioned behind Anders and there was Ezekiel, striding down the hallway to them. Again, Ezekiel pushed past Anders to get to Damien. Anders was convinced he was invisible or something.

“Hey, Zeke.” Damien wore a sheepish grin. “What took so long? We were scared you’d forgotten about me.”

Ezekiel frowned but didn’t dignify that with a response.

“Are you alright?” The older brother was eyeing the stitches on his brother’s cheeks. Maker, Anders didn’t want to know what he’d say if Ezekiel learned he did it and not a certified doctor.

“Yeah I’m fine. Carver is too,” Damien added.

Ezekiel’s teeth clenched. “Carver was with you? Is he here - Is he hurt?”

“No, no, bro, relax. Carver didn’t get a scratch on him. He dropped me off at the hospital and then took Isabela home.” Damien placed his hands on his brothers shoulders in an attempt to calm him down. It looked like that worked.

“Isabela was there too? What, did someone ‘verbally accost’ her again?”

Damien laughed and grabbed his side. “Aaah. Ow. Yeah. Those men are also here, if you were interested in knowing that.”

Ezekiel paused for a second. He seemed to be considering if he cared? Maybe? “I wasn’t. Who did your stitches?”

Damien pointed behind Ezekiel at Anders. “Anders the EMT.” Damien grinned.

Ezekiel turned and looked at Anders for the first time. Yeah, he was definitely invisible to this giant. Ezekiel looked almost the same as last week; bags under his eyes like he hadn’t had a good night’s rest in years, a few lines on his face, and - sunken cheeks? Was he getting enough to eat? The clothes were different, at least. White, purple, and grey plaid button up with black slacks.

“Anders.”

“Hello, Ezekiel.” Anders didn’t want to risk saying more than that after last week’s interaction.

Ezekiel and Damien exchanged a meaningful look and then Ezekiel sighed and turned back to Anders.

“The stitches look - good. Like they won’t get infected.”

Damien groaned loudly and Anders held back a laugh. He had to assume that was Ezekiel’s version of a compliment.

“Uh, thank you. I do my best with what we have. It’s not Amell quality resources, but we get by.” Anders smiled.

Ezekiel frowned and Damien grimaced and - Did Anders say something wrong?

“Right. We should get going, Damien.”  

Ezekiel walked by Anders down the hallway.

Damien got off the bed with that same grimace and stood next to Anders.

“You weren’t wrong, but you shouldn’t have said it. Zeke’s actually convinced Revka to donate supplies to Kirkwall’s hospitals twice a year. So some of this stuff is Amell quality.”

Anders could have kicked himself. Of course that sounded bitter.

“Can you tell him -”

“You’re sorry you said something so hurtful in your ignorance and hope to make it up to him?”

Anders suppressed a frown. “The first bit is more accurate.”

“Heh, alright. I can pass that along. Take care, Anders.”

Damien patted Anders’s shoulder and caught up with his brother, saying something about grabbing dinner before going home.

Just like last time, heads turned as they made their way out the building. Anders was impressed, just like last time, but he was starting to understand why. Sure, Ezekiel was definitely a catch, but Damien had his own charms. He was quick witted and funny and could take a punch, apparently. Actually, a great deal of pain, as many times he’s been in the hospital.

Anders called a nurse to clean what was left of Damien’s blood and moved on to the next patient.

*~*~

Anders strode through the hallway to the break room as quickly as he could. Doctors and nurses flitted about, rushing from one room to another, administering flu shots and changing bandages. It was a Tuesday afternoon and there were a lot of people in the ER with flu symptoms. Some just had stab wounds (this was Lowtown) but more than the usual were sick. He’d already been working since 10am and it was already 3pm. And he was starving. If he could just make it to the break room he’d be in the clear -

“Anders!”

Maker’s balls.

Anders stopped and turned to see Velanna flagging him down.

“Hey, I need you to take over a patient in the clinic for me.”

“Why, Velanna?”

“Because it’s time for my shift to be over.” Velanna crossed her arms, daring him to challenge her.

“Velanna, I’ve been here since 10 and I haven’t eaten -”

“Anders, I’ve been here since last night and I was called in to help with the sudden wave of sick people and I had to cancel a date with a handsome man to stay here.”

Anders glared at her and her superior smirk and gave up. It wasn’t his first full shift without eating and probably wouldn’t be his last.

“Fine. Whatever.”

“Thank you so much, Anders,” Velanna said sarcastically. She patted his arm once as they passed each other. He groaned in response and headed to the clinic.

----

Anders grabbed the clipboard in front of the door and knocked. This patient was diagnosed with a bruised rib and needed a follow up, but they weren’t sick, at least. He heard a voice confirm his entry and opened the door.

“Hey Anders!”

Anders looked up at the cheerful voice and there was Damien, leaning back on his elbows in the bed. His red shirt was torn just above his bicep and was tucked into his black jeans. Damien sat up as Anders crossed the room to him.

“Of course it’s you.” Anders sighed.

“Oh - yeah, sorry, it’s just me,” Damien responded despondently. “Didn’t really mean to bug you again -”

“No, no. No. Sorry Damien,” Anders cut him off. “I’m glad to see you - especially since it’s not in the ER.”

“Yeah, just a follow up, doc.” Damien seemed to be proud of that.

“I’m just really tired and starving and Velanna fed me some story about having to cancel a date with some guy and I just realized it was all a ploy to get me here -”

“She told you she cancelled a date with a guy?” Damien asked, incredulous. “She has a girlfriend, Anders. They hang out with Bethany and Claire sometimes. I’ve even seen them go on double dates with Carver and Merrill. Her name is Sigrun, I think?”

Anders pinched the bridge of nose in frustration. Velanna lied to get him in room with Damien. Why?

“Right. Of course. Just to mess with me I’m sure.”

“No! No, that’s not why - uh, look Anders I don’t wanna impose but -”

“Yes, right, your ribcage. Let me check you out.” Anders approached Damien and poked Damien’s ribcage and he jumped a little, but no groaning, no wincing.

“Your ribs are okay?”

Damien nodded and Anders examined his face - thin, dark lines replaced the red ones from a week ago. Damien’s arms weren’t bruised anymore either.

“You’re all healed up. This is literally the first time I’ve seen you uninjured. Why are you here then?”

“Right, yeah, hang on.”

Anders took a step back as Damien got off the bed and picked up a bag from the floor. He pulled out a small container of pasta, a smaller container filled with - maybe meat? - and a third full of red sauce.

Damien couldn’t be doing what Anders thought he was doing…. Could he?

“I don’t want you to feel like this is a bribe, or anything - I just made dinner last night and I figured you would need something to eat or whatever. I wanted to give this to you whether or not you said yes - Also I wasn’t sure if you ate meat? And I didn’t want to assume, so there’s vegetarian red sauce and some chicken -”

Damien went on and on with increasing nervousness and Anders just couldn’t wrap his head around this. Damien asked Velanna to get Anders into the clinic so Damien could bring him food and - what else?

“Damien, Damien,” Anders interrupted him. Damien stopped talking almost immediately. “What are you trying to say?”

“That, uh, this is your lunch that I made whether or not you say ‘yes.’ I mean - if you want it.” Damien extended the containers to Anders.

“Okay. Thank you, Damien,” Anders started, as he took the containers. “Say yes to what?”

“I was hoping that, maybe on your next off day or something, maybe you and I can … you know … go out to dinner? Or, like, lunch or a movie or something.”

Anders blinked. He went through all of this to ask him out?

“And if you don’t want to it’s fine! I’ll leave and you won’t have to see me again.” Damien paused. “Well, you will see me again, ‘cause I’m here a lot, but not like, in a ‘potentially romantic’ situation -”

“Damien. You’re rambling.” Anders couldn’t hold back a grin. When was the last time he was asked out on a date? Couldn’t even remember the last time he asked someone else. Maker, was he being courted? He suddenly felt nervous.

“Mhm.” Damien stopped talking again.

“I’d be glad to go on a date with you. One thing though; it’ll just be you and me, right? No family members?”

Damien’s eyebrows shot up in surprise and then he laughed. “Yeah, yeah. Just you and me. No family.”

“Then I’ll let you know when I’m free.” Anders smiled up at Damien and might have even thought he was blushing. Maker, he was too old to blush.

“That’s - Awesome! Great! Can’t wait!” Damien leaned in towards Anders, like he was going for a hug but then decided not to. “I’ll, uh see you around!”

Damien grabbed the bag and his jacket and bounded out the door. Anders looked over the stack of containers he’d gotten. How could anyone be so sweet?

And then he realized he didn’t have Damien’s number. So sweet and so impulsive. Anders supposed he could get Damien’s number from Velanna or Bethany -

Then he saw black writing on the largest container:

My brother’s number: (xxx) xxx-xxxx -Ezekiel

[petehparker]

Flames (Peter Parker x Female Reader)

Request: Hey honey! How are you? Can I have an imagine that you are the youngest avenger and in love with your friend peter parker? when he figures it out he distants himself cuz he likes liz. but with new scholarship program jean (your bff) and pietro (your ex) comes to the tower and something blossoms again between pietro and you so Peter becomes jealous and finally realizes his feelings? I would really like to read that so pls?? <3 Love you!

Word Count: 1,796

A/N: decided to try out Peter’s POV for this one and honestly I kinda loved it ngl. Hope you enjoy!! -Claire xx

“Oh, god, Y/N, how many times can I embarrass myself in front of her?” I run a frustrated hand through my hair.

Y/N sighed, rolling her eyes. “Calm down, Peter. You knocked over a book.” “I knocked over her book!”

“And then you picked it up, like a gentleman, and said sorry-”

“I stuttered, like an idiot, for fifteen minutes.” “It was thirty seconds. I was there.”

“She must think I’m so clumsy.”

Y/N set her book down on the bed. “You know what bothers me?”

“What?” I asked.

“You’ve had a crush on Liz since freshman year. She’s a senior. She’s leaving next year for college anyway, and the most contact you’ve ever legitimately had with her was that high five she gave you once after the scholastic bowl, and you talked nonstop about it for the entire day afterward.” I opened my mouth to object, but she shouldered on. “You’ve watched her talk about other boys, Peter. You’ve helped her do anything she asks you to do, you’ve been by her side, and nothing has happened. She’s nice to you, sure, but is she as nice to you as you are to her?” I was at a loss for words. “What do you mean?”

She sighed, shifting closer to me and the end of the bed. “I mean why not go for someone else? Someone who actually likes you?” My eyes flickered to hers and I was surprised to notice how somber she looked. “Liz likes me.”

“Liz is a very nice girl, Pete, don’t get me wrong.” Y/N grabbed my wrist. “But don’t spend all your time looking for what you think is perfect if- oh my god, this is so cliche to say, but what if what could make you happy is right in front of you? And you’re missing it?” “I still don’t get what you mean.” I felt like a hundred different things were flying through my mind all at once.

“Peter, I...” She trailed off, looking downwards. Strands of hair fell over her face. “I like you.” Her hand slid a little more tentatively into the palm of mine, but I couldn’t help pulling it away.

“Y/N, what are you doing?”

She shrunk back a little. “Peter...” I was confused and still a little embarrassed. “We’re friends, Y/N. Why are you trying to mess with that?” “I’m not trying to mess with anything, Peter, I just didn’t think it’d be fair if you didn’t know how I felt.” Her whole demeanor changed. In the blink of an eye, Y/N was standing up, grabbing her jacket off of one of my bedposts and sliding her backpack over her shoulder.

“Y/N, wait-” “I can see this was a bad idea, Peter.” I could hardly wrap my mind around what was happening; I could see tears glimmering in her eyes. “I’m sorry for doing this to you, I’m just going to go.” With that, she swept out of my room, leaving me confused and alone.

***

It had been days since I’d last talked to Y/N.

She had been busy helping out at the facility with the new training program. It didn’t take long for Tony to figure out something bad had happened between us and he had clearly been trying to keep us away from each other- for Y/N’s sake or mine, I had no idea. He certainly hadn’t been any nicer to me since then.

I still had no idea what to think about what Y/N had told me. I had no clue she had feelings for me, and I didn’t know what this meant. When I told Ned what happened, he threatened to slap me upside the head for being stupid, although when I asked him to explain what he meant, he had just laughed and gone back to our Lego construction.

Her words had been like a bucket of cold water. I couldn’t stop thinking about what she had said about Liz. It was true that I had been hung up on her for far too long, and also true that she would be gone next year.

The next time I saw her, we were walking towards each other in the hallway at the facility. She was walking with a tall girl with long red hair, but before I could register much else, her friend had steered her down a side hallway and they had disappeared by the time I got there.

I looked for her everywhere I could think of. Tony locked me out of the training rooms, so she spent most of her time in there with the new trainees. It didn’t take long for me to figure out who the girl with the red hair was- Jean was an old friend of Y/N’s. It was no wonder they had reconnected so quickly.

When I called her, I usually got voicemail- to which I left long, babbling messages, asking her to call me back and going on and on about how badly I needed to talk to her. Once, another girl had answered and shouted into the phone about how Y/N didn’t want to see me again. I didn’t call after that.

Of course, I had no idea what I would say if she did answer. I didn’t think I liked her back, at least not the way she felt for me. She was pretty, I’d admit, but I hadn’t put much thought into whether or not I really had a crush on her. All I knew was that I didn’t like not having her around, not having someone to text until 3 in the morning or call for the walk home from school. I had never really noticed how much space she took up in my life until she was gone, and that was the worst part.

The next time I saw Y/N, she was outside helping one of the trainees practice. It was hard to tell who he was- he was darting around so rapidly that all I saw was a blur of blue and silver. I watched from afar as she threw targets into the air for the blur to catch until he crashed into her, the flimsy targets flying everywhere as his arms wrapped around her waist. They were both laughing like crazy, from what I could see from where I was. I was only there a second longer before Happy steered me away from the scene.

Needless to say, my texts also went unanswered.

***

It became overwhelming after a couple weeks had passed.

I kept seeing her with the source of the blur, who I had learned was named Pietro. He was handsome in a way that made me feel a little sick to my stomach. Jean also seemed to follow them around, seeming more like what looked to me like a third wheel than anything else.

It boiled over one night. I found myself in front of her door, knocking heavily. I had no idea what I wanted to say, and I wasn’t even trying to figure it out until Y/N pulled the door open.

“Peter?” She asked.

“Y/N, please let me in. I need to talk to you.” I worried for a second about sounding needy but stopped caring almost immediately.

She hesitated a little but stepped aside to let me in. I followed her down to her bedroom.

“Peter, what are you doing here?” She sat on her bed, tucking herself even deeper into her sweatshirt, which was easily too big for her.

“You’ve been ignoring me,” I stated like it wasn’t obvious.

She shrugged. “I thought maybe you’d go talk to Liz and tell her how you feel.”

I didn’t know how to respond to this. I felt so upset and exasperated and mad at myself for not being strong enough to do this earlier, I felt like I might puke. I pulled frustratedly at the ends of my sleeves. “Y/N, I haven’t thought about Liz in weeks. I haven’t seen Liz in weeks. I can’t stop thinking about what you said, it’s driving me crazy.” “Why didn’t you talk to me earlier?” She said it like she already knew the answer.

“I called you! I called you and called you and called you, pleading with you to let me sort this out with you, and you never picked up. You just left, Y/N!” My voice was beginning to get raw. “And of course you replaced me right away, right?”

She looked shocked, pushing herself off the bed so that she was level with me. “I did not replace you!”

I shook my head fervently. “You might want to tell Pietro that!” “Peter, what are you saying? You rejected me, okay, and I was embarrassed.” There was so much energy coursing through my entire body, I knew I had to do something. “I get it if you want to just be friends and I thought maybe you might not want-” All my stamina finally went into overdrive, and I wasn’t expecting what I did next. I found myself framing her face with my hands, leaning in quickly, and-

I kissed her. More than kissed her, actually. It felt like more than I had ever felt in my entire life. The flames in my stomach were flaring brighter than ever. I didn’t know what I expected, but when she started to kiss back, I knew that that was what I had wanted.

When the kiss ended, she pulled back with wide eyes. “Peter, what are you doing?” She sat back down on the bed and I remained standing. “I mean, where does this put us?”

“Y/N,” I took a deep breath and sat a couple inches away from her on the bed. She looked so soft, like this, her hair drifting in loose strands around her face, the tips of her fingers just poking out of her sweatshirt sleeves, her eyes wandering. “I was a complete idiot. You were right- I was being blinded by Liz. It was a childish crush, something I used to shield what I was really feeling.” I hesitantly started to reach for her hand on the bed between us. She let me slip my fingers between hers. “Y/N, you mean so much to me, so much more than I ever could have imagined. I was a dumbass, for lack of better words. But I want to start this. I want to have this, with you.” Her breathing was starting to slow. I looked at her as meaningfully as I could.

“Will you go on a date with me? Can you give me a second chance?” The flames I felt in my stomach only started to shrink as soon as I saw her slowly start to nod.

I gripped her hand even tighter.

TAG LIST:

@kawaiitickles

@evenmyphonemissesyourcall94

@clean-and-claire

@manyfandomstohandle

@tiny-friggin-human

@anastasiaannaa

@1022bridgetp

[wonderlandinrope]

Not All Monsters Part 6

Sam x Reader

Summary: Sam and Dean are stuck between a rock and a hard place while Aris fights her urge to feed after being turned. 

Warnings: Fighting, Violence, some swearing

A deep laughter erupted from deep within the vamp's chest. Sam struggled with the one holding him but couldn’t move without risking his arm breaking. The vamp holding him was stronger than some of the other’s they had met. Sliding a long sharp nail across Sams' throat a red line appeared catching the attention of the newly turned vampire. Shoving Aris toward him almost to tease her she lunged taking Sam down to the ground. Struggling with the other vamp Dean shouted at Aris, but to no avail. Aris was on top of Sam who was holding her at arm's length.

The vampire holding Dean began to bite into his neck the fresh blood caught Aris attention. Snapping her out of the savage hunger that was manifesting itself as physical pain. Looking down she found herself staring into the hazel eyes that had brought her so much comfort the past week. Feeling herself regain the slightest amount of control return she turned on the other vampire standing over them. Sam stood placing his hand on the cut on his neck, Grabbing the knife he charged at the one holding Dean.

Lights began to flicker then die as a storm rolled in, wind shaking the door to the garage. With all the commotion no one noticed the door creaked open, the sound was disguised by a roll of thunder. What they did notice was the sudden lack of laughter. The younger vamps froze as a head rolled across the floor, landing at their feet. Now outnumbered the two of them took off leaving Claire to chase after them. One continued to stay trying to hold its ground as it struggled with Aris.

“What the hell happened?” Jody helped Dean off the ground

“Dude had a serious Ax to grind. Aris got caught in the crosshairs.” Dean grabbed his own machete swung severing the head off of the vampire that was trying to rip out Aris throat.

Finding a wall Aris gripped the workbench so tight her fingers began to create divots. “I’m sorry!” She shouted.

Finishing off his own vampire Sam rushed to the decapitated vamp taking the head then running out the Impala. Claire reappeared a moment later machete at the ready, Jody and Dean stood before Aris who was now cowering in the corner. Without hesitation, she rushed at Aris, as she stood to anticipate the blow. It would be sweet relief to no longer has to face the fear that lived inside her. Or fight the craving that seemed to burn within her.

“Claire wait.” Sam reappeared grabbing her arm, “She’s with us.”

With a slightly confused look, she dropped her arm. Taking another look at the vamp she saw someone who was terrified beyond compare. Leaning away from them.

“That’s odd doesn’t seem like your type.” She took a step away letting Sam take the lead.

“Drink this.” Reaching out he held a glass with a red liquid in it that smelled appalling. Pulling back Aris feared to try to hurt him again. “Aris you need to drink this it will turn you back.”

Hesitantly she took it near gagging as she choked it down. Waiting for the cure to take effect, as she heard sobered up her attention became needlepoint to the body laying on the floor. Like a magnet, she gravitated to the body taking in the lifeless heap on the floor. His throat shredded hamburger meat, eyes open already fogging over. As an invisible weight lifted from her shoulders she felt a fiery wave of words spew from her mouth.

“You Dick! Every opportunity you had to tear me down. Taking away my voice, the ones I loved! You stole my fucking life. Five of the worst god damn year of my existence. Not a day went by that you didn’t try to run me off a cliff.  Threatening me threatening my sister. But look who’s still standing you fucking ass hole!” her voice breaking on the last word

Her foot swung hitting the body with the full force of her body. It felt good, better than any therapy might be able to supply. Kicking him again harder this time letting herself lose control, landing a physical kick for every mental one he dealt her, wishing desperately that they hurt even an ounce of the agony she had been dragged thru. A pair of hands pulling her away she yelled then let go relaxing into Sam’s chest clinging to him. Afraid that this may be another dream.

Walking her out to the car, as the others rounded up the bodies to get ready to burn them, no words were spoken. However, there was no need for words. Sam knew how she felt and couldn’t blame her for acting as she did. Every one of them has had run in with monsters. Even living with them in their heads for a period of time. Of course, not all monsters were things that could be cast away with a spell, holy water,  or killed with silver.

Gathering around the pier Dean looked to the group. “Anything you want to say?” He held the lighter out ready to set the building ablaze. The rain coming down softer now, more like a mist that clung to the air unable to find a place to rest.

“Wish I could have killed him myself.” She stated flatly.

Taking the lighter from Dean she threw it onto the line of gas, it lit instantly they watched for a moment as the old garage began to catch. One by one they turned away until only Aris and Sam remained. Their hands just brushing against each other at first then fingers intertwined, looking up at him she nodded knowing that it was time to go.

Standing outside the bus station people were busy making their way to their various destinations, be the counter or the parking lot. It was busy a chaotic scene but somehow in the madness of it, all Aris finally found herself calm for the first time in nearly five years. She no longer felt the need to look over her shoulder or think two steps ahead. She could enjoy the moment for what it was.

Placing a duffle bag next to her feet Aris turned smiling at the men who had changed her life in the most extraordinary way. While they had confessed her the realities of the world and the real-life monsters that resided in it. They had also provided her with a piece of mind as to how to defend herself from them. And the best part of all was that they had helped free her from the only monster that ever truly struck her with fear. Dan was gone never to come back. It was time to go find her sister, start over so that she could live a normal life as possible.

“Before I go I wanted to say thank you both so much for everything you have done.” Her voice soft but stern.

Clearing her throat to avoid getting over emotional she looks up at them giving them a smile that had been dead for too long. Without a second thought, she threw her arms around Dean giving him the type of hug one only receives when someone is saying goodbye. Deep and genuine. Reciprocating the hug they break apart Dean Smiling a cocky half-smile she’d come to love.

“No problem, we’re going to miss you too. Keep fighting pipsqueak. ” He encouraged.

Nodding she grinned. “Always.”

A silence fell between them. Sam adjusting his head to the right. Dean, feeling out of place took the opportunity to look at the pamphlets that sat on the wall nearby.

“You going to be ok out there on your own?” Sam asked.

Aris felt a lightness to her. “Yes, thanks to you.” Reaching upward she found herself lightly kissing him on the lips.  “I’m sorry.” She whispered eyes closed.

“Don’t be.” Pulling the spare phone Aris had given back from his pocket. He placed it in her hands. “Take this. It’s got my number in it, call if you're ever in trouble. Or if you ever just want to talk.”

“I will. And if you’re ever in Washington look me up.” As they said their last goodbyes the loudspeaker announced the bus was loading. “This is then. I’ll see you around.”

“See you around.” It felt odd saying goodbye after everything. It would have been just another case but it wasn’t he didn’t want to let her go.

Turning to Sam she couldn’t help herself, reaching up on her toes stretching as much as she could she wrapped her arms around his neck but instead of the hug, he was expecting her lips crashed into his. The kiss was soft, warm, gentle in a way that felt like home. Sam a little taken aback at first found himself sinking into the kiss.  The kiss lasted a only a minute but it felt like a lifetime that could have been. Then as quickly as she could she go onto the bus

Watching out the window she waved goodbye hoping that this wouldn’t be the last time she would see the remarkable duo. Just maybe next time it would be under better circumstances.

One Year Later

Waiting in line at the Gas n Sip after a long night of werewolf hunting Sam held a basket full of the best road foods. Jerky for Dean, protein bars for himself. Beer for later when they needed to stop or if they decided to stay the night somewhere. Looking out the window Dean was filling up the car. As he turned back to the line before him a petite figure appeared a familiar voice asking for change for a twenty.

Feeling a smile creep across his face he hoped that she would see him. But took the moment to watch her as she was unaware of his presence. He missed her little mannerisms the tapping her fingers as if she were playing the piano, the way her hair was a tangled mess even when pulled back in a ponytail.

Taking the change from the cashier, she went to walk out only to freeze in her footsteps, as she saw a familiar black car with a cocky man with short hair leaning against the Impala. It was Dean which meant that her favorite Winchester would be close by. Not seeing him in the parking lot she turned abruptly only a few feet from where she had been standing Sam gave a little wave. Almost dropping everything on the floor, she let out a squeal, making everyone turn as she half ran jumping, throwing her arms around his neck.

“I can’t believe it! How have you been?” Aris was so lively so enthusiastic that she almost seemed like a different person.

“Great. You seem to be doing well yourself.” Sam paid for the food as they made their way out of the store.

“I got my life back, thanks to you guys. Spent two months with my sister then caught the travel bug.” Aris boasted. Feeling proud of all the progress that she had made over the past year.

Still leaning against the car Dean watched carefully to make sure that the tank was full before they left. Placing the gas pump back he looked back for Sam but out of nowhere a small body flew at him arms wrapping around him. At first instinct, he thought he should reach for something to fight back but then his brothers smiling face came into view. Looking down it took him a minute to recognize the girl before him. Aris looked so much healthier, she had a tan, gained some weight, having a glow to her that resonated with happiness.

“Aris!” He picked her up swinging her around before placing her back on the ground. “You look great! What are you doing in Kansas?”

“Traveling. Seeing the world. living.” She shrugged leaning against the Impala. “I’ve missed this baby. How about you guys? Still hunting I assume.”

Nodding enjoying the energy she was giving off Dean found Aris to be a completely different person. “Of course. We need to stay sharp, just finished a werewolf hunt last night.”

“Dean she doesn’t want to hear about that.” Sam rolled his eyes. “If your not in a hurry, How would you like to join us for lunch?”

The thought of spending time anytime with the brother sounded amazing. In Fact another day she would have traded her left arm to see them again. To feel like she wasn’t stuck on the edge of society, knowing the truth about what was out there both set her free to not take a day for granted but it also turned her into Alice in Wonderland. Walking around seeing things for what they were, while others wore rose-colored glasses.

“Sadly no I can’t. I’m meeting up with a group to go rock climbing today. It’s the only good day this week to go.” She looked off as an old station wagon pulled in to the parking lot. She waved. “Here they are now.”

Sam looked over to see a man sitting in the driver seat he smiled at Aris in a way that made him a little uncomfortable, and just a tad bit jealous. He cleared his throat, Dean gave him a look laughing a little to himself. Sam ignored it running his hand through his hair.

“We could go with you.” Sam offered rather quickly.

Turning to look at the brothers delighted at the idea. “You mean it?”

“Of course.” Dean backing up his brother offer. “Can’t let you go that quickly.”

“Sounds great! I’ll let them know, just follow us ok?” Aris gave Dean another hug. Turning to Sam she reached up pecking Sam on the cheek. Speaking more to Sam than to Dean she added: “I’m really happy I ran into you guys.”

As the brothers loaded into the car following behind Aris and the small group that she had met up with Sam watched the group bouncing around the car. He could see Aris laughing, joking around. He bit his lip questioning if it was really a good idea to re-enter her life. Even with the kiss still burning on his cheek, it had been a year so much could have changed. Aris said it herself, after all, she was getting her life back. And that life may be better off without him.

“Man, she has changed,” Dean commented. “I almost didn’t recognize her. And she seems to still have a bit of a crush on you.”

“Yeah, I know but look at her. I don’t want to come in crashing her world. She has a good thing going from the looks of it.” As they turned the last bend into the trail the Station Wagon was parked just ahead. Everyone already gearing up.

“So what you want to play it cool? Not make any promises we can’t keep?” Dean questioned.

“Preferably yes.” Getting out of the Impala the each grabbed a ready hiking bag. Throwing in a few extras, a gun, the demon knife. Just in case.  

“No promises then Romeo.” Dean hurried off to meet with the small group of hikers.

Aris excitedly waving them over to introduce them to the group. As Sam made his way something off in the distance caught his eye. At first, he thought it might just be a torn up tree from the storm a few nights ago. Or even from a bear, but as he walked closer there was something in his gut that warned him against letting his guard down. Looking around again he spotted a few drops of blood on the ground a smear on the tree. “Shit.”

[imagineclaireandjamie]

A request for mod MBD... more of the Casualty AU please! I just *need* to know what happens next! Love... you know who ;)

PART 1.

With his shoulder dislocated - again - Jamie had been on bed rest. Claire had busied herself with her usual routine, coming to visit as often as she could. Even though Joe had pressed her to do it, neither her or Jamie had made mention of Brianna.

Things at home had changed dramatically. Bree had always been a fairly easy going child, but now she seemed to have sensed that something had awoken within her mother and subsequently had become quite insular. Always watching, the intuitive seven year old had taken to silently watching Claire as often as she could.

“Can I leave soon?” Jamie perked up, cradling his mending arm against his chest much as he’d done on his first meeting with Claire all those *centuries* ago. Claire shook off the thought of their daughter in favour of attending to Jamie’s remaining wounds.

“I should think so, Joe says he’s pleased with the progress you’ve been making. I’ll get him to O.K you first though, alright? So that means no lifting!” Side-eyeing him, she saw him sink a little into the thin mattress, his eyes looking immediately guilty. Claire knew he’d been helping the night staff move heavy equipment but so far they’d all been relatively silent on the matter. “I know you, James Fraser. Bed rest means *no* heavy lifting. Stubborn man.”

The atmosphere in the room changed in that moment and Claire knew what was coming the second quiet rose up around them. He’d be waiting to ask since the moment he’d accepted that he was alive. But he’d been scared too, petrified of what she might tell him. Since she was here alone, no Frank in tow, he’d been afraid something terrible had happened after he’d sent her back through the stones.

“Ye havena told me, Claire,” he began, his voice soft and slow as if approaching a wild animal face on.

She didn’t even bother to feign ignorance. Instead Claire folded the final towel and turned to face Jamie, her eyes shining with tears, Bree’s face coming to mind the minute he’d started talking.

“Our bairn, Claire. Does he -- she -- live?”

His voice was alight with such tenuous hope that Claire couldn’t bear to keep him in the dark any longer.

As if summoned, and before Claire could even open her mouth, the door to Jamie’s room slammed open and Brianna herself darted in with her wild red curls flying around her face, her tiny school bag bobbing madly against her back.

“Mam! Uncle Joe said…” sliding to a stop, Bree turned to face Jamie, excitement thrumming through her veins as she threw the rucksack from her shoulders. Paying no more attention to her mother, Bree slid on the balls of her feet across the slippy lino of the private hospital suite. “You came,” she whispered, holding her small hand up towards Jamie as he, in turn, shifted his weight so that the pair were almost nose to nose.

Claire gasped, the lump in her throat growing until she felt as if she might suffocate on the spot.

Jamie couldn’t speak. It was as if Brianna’s arrival had stolen the words from him. She was his, he kent it in an instant without Claire having to introduce them.

Bree tipped her head to the side, appraising Jamie with a careful but open gaze. Laying her hand against his cheek, she slowly slid her palm against the plains of his face. “You were lonely, like mam is.” It was a statement borne of fact, not a question. Seeing straight through his fast recovery, the lines of his time apart from Claire still stood stark beneath his eyes and Bree had picked up on it without hesitation.

Jame smiled and nodded. No need for words, he was captivated by the arrival of Brianna -- and he hadn’t even been told her name yet.

 “J-Jamie,” Claire stuttered, realising the information he was missing, “this is Brianna. Bree, this is Jamie.”

“I know,” she said with conviction, her large blue eyes flitting between Jamie and Claire as she watched them both, continuing with zero caution. “He was lost, mam, like you. He needs us.”

“How do you--” Claire’s mind was buzzing with questions, how on earth could Bree know Jamie? She hadn’t mentioned her parentage for fear of how to describe Jamie or his absence. She had often just thought to say he was dead, being young, Bree would have accepted that as fact. She knew about the war, surely she would have just guessed that was the reason. Claire needn’t have said anymore but she’d been reticent to do such a thing. Now with Jamie miraculously restored to them, she had to explain what he was to her. Yet it seemed Brianna had her own ideas.

Clever lass.

“Dinna tell me that,” Jamie joked, ignoring doctors orders as he hauled Bree onto the bed with his good arm, “yer mam has never been lost. She’s the most incredible survivor, aye?”

Bree waggled her feet off the bed, her focus solely on Jamie now as Claire silently paced forwards, her heart beating madly in her chest.

“Aye,” she returned, picking up on his deep Scottish brogue and unconsciously mimicking it, replacing her own soft Scots with Jamie’s highland lilt. “She is, but you both have pieces missing.”

“Bree…” Claire’s hand reached forward, cupping the back of her daughter's head as she placed a delicate kiss on her forehead, “I-” attempting to pull together some semblance of normalcy, Claire tried to dismiss the notion that Brianna might *know* that Jamie was her father. Understanding her desolation was one thing, Claire wasn’t that good at hiding her emotions and even though she’d improved on leaving Frank, she still wasn’t -- nor ever would be -- as good as Jamie at masking her feelings.

“Did you really live in a cave?” Brianna piped in, too highly charged to wait for her mother to finish her sentence.

Claire’s eyes flashed to Jamie immediately, her breath catching in her throat as the room fell into a shocked silence.

His mouth dry, Jamie tried desperately to answer Bree’s question. “Yes,” he choked out finally, his words barely a whisper in the quiet room as he licked his lips and nodded.

“Woah,” Bree mouthed, her lips lifting into a smile as she bounced over Jamie’s knees.

“Where did you learn that?” Claire asked, glancing over at Bree and then back to Jamie with awe dancing across her face. A cave? How could she know such a thing, when even Claire didn’t know that.

Feeling guilty, Claire leant her weight against the windowpane. She’d been too enraptured in Jamie’s company to ask too many questions about their painful separation. In attempting to avoid mentioning their time apart she was oblivious to the half-life Jamie had been living in her absence.

“I read it!” Bree announced proudly, “in a school book wi’ some history bits and bobs in it. Then I dreamed about you,” she said, addressing Jamie once more, “and I asked you to come...and here you are.”

“Jesus H…” Claire pushed herself off the thin glass, pulled the bedside chair closer to the cot and sat with one hand on Jamie and the other against Bree’s knee. “How did you ask, Bree?”

Without even contemplating such an action ludicrous, Bree patted Claire’s hand lightly, her small warm hand soothing Claire’s shaky ones as she pursed her lips and squinted her eyes - distinctly Fraser eyes - cat like and sharp, exactly like Jamie’s. “I just -- asked. I saw him, he saw me and I told him ye needed him. Do you remember it?”

She seemed so hopeful, her whole body vibrating with delight at her actions as she shimmied herself sideways, slipping into Claire’s lap as she snuggled closer to her mother.

Struggling to sit, Jamie pulled himself upwards, letting his legs fall over the side of the bed. Closing his eyes and tilting his head back he tried to pull forth the memories of the cave. Pain shot through him but he pushed it aside. Knowing that Claire was close eased the dark echoes of the past. His dreams had been sporadic and wisp-like. Unable to grasp most of them, the only ones he’d recalled were the ones of Claire herself. Did he remember seeing his wee lassie? He couldn’t be certain.

Half starved, cold and alone, he’d often envisioned Claire and the child though he’d never guessed as to the gender of the wean. She was only a tiny dot in his mindseye back then. A small bairn with nothing to denote the precious child he saw before him now.

“Doesna matter!” Bree interjected, pulling both Jamie and Claire from their internal thoughts yet again. “You’re here now, you came.”

“Brianna,” Jamie sighed, leaning further forward and laying his large hand against her buoyant curls - his colour with Claire’s volume - distinctly rolling the r’s in her name as he spoke. “Do ye ken who I am...truly?”

Bree cocked her head. In that moment it was clear to both Jamie and Claire that the rather adult notions she’d been relaying to them before had dissipated. She’d vocalised the notions she was certain of but now she was the same precocious seven year old she usually was.

“You’re Jamie...you and mamma, you’re meant for each other.”

The innocence in her voice brought fresh tears to Claire’s eyes as she wrapped her arms more fully around Bree, bringing them that much closer to Jamie as she brushed the stray curls from her daughter’s brow.

“Brianna, there’s something we should tell you, alright?”

Unable to second guess what it could possibly be, Brianna settled herself. Bright-eyed, she glanced excitedly between Jamie and Claire and nodded.

“Jamie and I, well,” reaching out, Claire took Jamie’s hand gingerly, his silver ring glinting in the glow of the bedside lamp, catching all of their eyes as she took a large breath and continued, “Jamie is your father, Bree. Your biological father.”

[seenashwrite]

SNIPED (Part Three)

Status: Complete (Part 3 of 5) Word Count: 7.8K Rating: 18+/Mature/Explicit for Adult Themes including - Graphic sexual situations; Mild-to-moderate violence; Coarse language Categories: Drama; Action; Romance; Porn-with-Plot; Smut; On-the-hunt Character(s): Dean; Sam; Reader/O.C. Female; Jody; Crowley [briefly]; Alex & Claire [mentioned]; Castiel [mentioned] Pairings: Dean x Reader/OC Female [Pts. 2 & 5]; Sam x Reader/OC Female [Pt. 3] Warning(s): See “Rating” section above Author’s Note(s): See Part One Overall Summary: The Winchesters receive assistance on their case from a sniper. Part Three Summary: The sniper rushes to aid Jody, getting caught in Winchester crossfire for her trouble.

             || SNIPED Master Post ||

I had just gotten out of the shower and was naked in front of the mirror, squeezing my wet, finger-combed hair, when I heard a soft rapping at the door.

I sighed, glanced down at the handgun I'd left next to the sink. Anyone coming after me that was worth their salt could've just kicked in the cheap motel's plywood door. Besides, I knew who it was; no need to arrive armed.

I wrapped the thin towel around myself, holding it closed as it was too small to tuck, padded over and opened the door, an expressionless look already plastered on my face when I raised my head.

Sam briefly glanced over me, gulped.

I rolled my eyes, then raised my eyebrows.

"I, uh... thought I'd take you up on..."

I stood aside and he walked in. "Over there," I said, turning away to walk back to the bathroom, pointing at the small bottle of tequila set next to the single-wrapped plastic cups and ice bucket on the dresser.

I closed the bathroom door, my privacy now gone, finished drying off my hair best I could, then glanced around. Shit. I'd stripped off in the room, and knew the dress I'd been wearing had been thrown to god knew where as soon as I'd unzipped it and pulled it off. So I re-wrapped, opened the door, walked back out.

Sam was sitting on the bed, leaned against the headboard, one leg partly propped up, the other still on the floor as if he didn't want to give the impression he'd totally made himself at home. His hair had gotten longer since I'd last seen him, and it was mostly held back in an elastic. He still had on the long-sleeved plaid shirt from earlier but it was unbuttoned atop his white tank undershirt now. The denim had been traded for loose track pants, untied boots thrown over bare feet for his walk to my door.

He was sipping on my tequila, and he'd brought the bottle over to the nightstand next to him. He'd also gathered and straightened up my things. The shoulder holster was hung on a chair, and the now un-crumpled dress was draped across the back of the other chair, pumps aligned neatly underneath it. He met my eye, I shot him an odd look, then walked to the dress.

"You're putting that back on?" Sam asked.

"My go-bag was in my car."

"What?"

I turned to him. "Got the call, grabbed some gear, got in the jeep, came to you. My options are naked or this, soooo..."

I could practically feel the heat radiating off of his bright red blushing. Good. I wanted him to feel embarrassed, ashamed. He deserved it.

Earlier that night, when I'd turned my phone back on upon getting home, it was filled with messages. I'd just gotten in from doing some recon; well, recon of a sort. It required a low-cut black dress with a mostly open back that was a little too tight and a little too short, though not so short as to reveal the upper thigh holster and switchblade strapped to it. The rest of my uniform only consisted of diamond studs, and black patent pumps with ankle cuffs that fastened via a shiny zipper up the back.

Jody had been at my old house helping me pack up my husband's things when they'd arrived; I'd ordered them to wear out on our one-year anniversary. The anniversary we'd never gotten to. She had opened them for me, absently commenting on what great "fuck-me pumps" they were without thinking, but the moment of levity had made me laugh for the first time since that night. Jody said she'd buy them off me, but I kept them. Turned out to be a valuable piece of tactical gear in the long run.

Valuable for the current leg of my mission, at least - an expensive dinner, the third that week, full of light groping and fingering under the table, with my latest lead on Red Smoke, which is what I'd taken to calling my target. My lead was a good fifteen years older than me, but quite handsome, reminded me of that actor on that show, the one that Jody's kids called "a silver fox". Shitty kisser, but easy to keep at bay with teasing promises of the next time. He liked me, and he would keep liking me, for as long as it took. I needed to know what all exactly his reportedly shady dealings involved, how exactly he’d gone from rags-to-riches in just under a decade.

I was now on my own. My latest P.I. had gotten taken out. I hadn't heard from him for several weeks following the text I’d gotten after my night with Dean. He'd never answered my return call, was never at his office. Despite a slew of fake names, I finally tracked down where he lived. Good timing, too.

Found crime scene tape, cops, coroner, the smell of rotting flesh spilling out into the apartment building's hallways. Courtesy of a fake badge Jody’d helped me with, a neighbor told me they'd called the police once the stench had gotten so bad. Pity they didn't know the smell of human decay well enough to separate it from the smell of garbage in their minds.

I wasn't going to involve anyone else. Not really out of care for my fellow man; more because trails of bodies could lead back to me. Which is why I hauled ass to the P.I.'s office and torched it. The cops would just assume it was his killer, and in a round-about way, I suppose that was true. I had probably gotten him killed.

Sam thought I had gotten Dean killed.

At least, that was the impression Jody had, it was amongst the things she'd relayed in the first few voice mails. Seems Dean had been a busy boy. To Sam, he referred to his secretive solo outings as "snipe hunts", and the younger man had finally put two-and-two together, namely because of the condition in which his brother would return. Sometimes physical signs, mostly behavioral signs, both telling Sam that Dean wasn't going on fool's errands; he was hunting for me.

And Sam had not been shy when sharing his theory with Jody. I already knew Dean had been pestering Jody for my current address, the house that wouldn't show up on any background check because I was paying my rent in cash to the little old lady who owned it, keeping it under the table so she wouldn't have to claim the income. Dean kept saying he didn't want to bother me, just wanted to check on me. Jody knew he'd been texting me sporadically since my disappearing act, but also knew I wouldn't get in deeper with him.

Not now. Not when I was getting close. And Dean had respected Jody when she firmly told him she was not breaking my confidence. It seemed, however, that he had not taken my desire to distance myself from him to heart.

There were at least a dozen messages screaming at me, texts and voice mails, all over the span of a few hours. The texts were garbage, short spurts of CALL ME-s and 911!-s and WHERE ARE YOU-s. The longest text was the first: 

Dean's in bad trouble. Sam doesn't want you involved. Need you to be.

Three words into her initial voice mail, I turned and immediately went to the large safe in the basement, not because of what she was saying - I could get filled in on Dean’s journey into stupidity later - but because of the panic in her voice. Putting it on speaker, I laid it on the long metal table that lived against the wall. Grabbed the large duffel, laid it out on the floor, spun the dial on the safe, clicked to the next message. More panicked, but still focused, now describing the location I'd be going to, outlining what she knew of the opposition.

Good girl. Jody was scared, but she was with it enough to relay precisely the things I'd have asked. And by the sound of it, the logistics of the location were more of an issue than its occupants.

I smiled, removing my favorite rifle, the one that was like another limb for me, the one for which I didn't need a thousand fancy accoutrements to nail anyone - or, now-a-days, anything - on the other end. So to the bag I only added a suppressor, a night-vision scope,  and a small box of the appropriate ammo. Then on second thought, the laser sight - not for need, just because I wanted these assholes to know they were about to meet their maker.

Next message. I threw on a shoulder holster, pulled a .9 mil, made sure the mag was full. Satisfied, I fastened it in. Squatting in front of the low shelves, I looked over the rest of my options. Now Jody's voice had gone to an angry tone, demanding to know where the hell I was, what happened to the promise I'd made to Dean, that I'd be there for them if they needed me. I chose two flat packages, stuffing them in the bag along with their corresponding remote triggers, tuning out the rest of her rant.

Next message. Obvious tears, a new pitch, a catch in her usually strong voice. I felt my neck and face flush with anger. Fucking Winchesters. But, more information through the tears - my latest targets were using a webcam to communicate with Sam. So he could see and hear a live feed of what they were doing... what they had been doing... to Dean. For the past 36 hours and counting. I shook off my annoyance at Sam's abject idiocy for waiting so long to reach out for help.

And not to me - I'd not heard from them regarding help on a job since the hunt we'd gone on almost five months prior. Even though now they were close; very close. Just as close in proximity as they were to Jody, they knew I lived near her, and in a situation like this I couldn't imagine how they thought a sheriff could lend the same level of assistance.

I swung the bag over my shoulder, picked up the phone in one hand, grabbed one of several burners plugged in and charging along the backside of the table with the other. I dialed a number I'd had memorized for years. I made mental note to wipe it down and toss it at some point on the road.

A former bureau colleague of mine in surveillance had believed me when I'd said I thought we were targeted that day, though I’d phrased it as suspecting the team had been targeted. It was, after all, at least moderately probable - the intelligence on the op was shown to be false. The subsequent investigation had revealed no evidence of a threat anywhere in that building, but of course the intel failure didn't make it to the official report, what with all the room detailing my supposed break-down had taken up.

I always thought he felt somewhat guilty about that, even though he was a low-level analyst, because he had a bit of a thing for me. And he'd proven it by agreeing to be my contact on the inside. I had a favor still on the books, courtesy of the quick oral thank-you I'd bestowed upon him. So fuck the Winchesters again, for forcing me to use the favor on them.

Next message. Told me she was about to go back to where she and Sam were positioned, told me where, then went into borderline hysterics, which I hadn't heard coming out of Jody since I held her in my arms and she released all the pain, describing the night her dead son tore apart her husband. I stopped the message before it even finished; “furious” didn’t even begin to describe what had flooded over me.

In the garage now, I set down the bag, grabbed a set of keys off the hook. I pulled the cover off of my husband's trusty old jeep. Battered to hell, still ran like a dream. I'd kept up its maintenance, every once and awhile still taking it out to dusty open roads, pushing it to the limit, taking curves too fast. I took the briefest of moments to run my fingers across the hood. He wasn't perfect. Our relationship was far from perfect. If I was honest, we'd gotten married partly to try and save it. But goddamn, we'd had some good times in that car.

I threw the bag in back. Cranked the engine, backed it out, left it running while I closed the garage door. Then before I peeled out into the night, I texted Jody:

Breathe - coming to you now

I'd gotten to the location in under fifteen minutes without raising any suspicion. It was one of several foreclosed houses that were in a gaudy, over-priced, mostly vacant subdivision filled with eyesore after eyesore about ten miles outside of the main metro area of town. I took the jeep off-road, as it were, up the cleared-off, steep hill at the back of the division. It plateaued and butted up against an undeveloped wooded area.  

According to my surveillance contact, based on the brief glimpses he could afford, the satellite showed heat signatures were sticking to the front end of the house where Dean was being kept. Not wise in terms of detection, but perhaps the trade-off was being closer to one of the still-occupied homes. A piggy back off of their wi-fi to send their feed would make sense, as their hideout wouldn't have its own.

Sam and Jody were crouched behind a fallen tree at the top of a slope to the side of the cul-de-sac where the home was located. It backed up to a particularly dense area of the trees, which was the smartest damn thing Sam had done that day, limiting his exposure. I hated him for bringing Jody into this. Hated. I silently crept up on them, but not before I'd taken care of a little business.

"Thank god," Jody exhaled, squeezing my knee once I'd dropped the bag and knelt beside them.

Sam's eyes shot daggers through me, then he looked back down to his phone. The volume was low, the feed slightly glitched, but I could glimpse Dean's battered and bloody face and torso. Clearly heard the occasional grunts of pain.

"Mute that shit," I hissed.

Another glare, but Sam complied.

Jody glanced down, saw my pumps were slightly muddied, and that my calves were splattered with the same. "How long have you been here?" she whispered.

"Long enough to leave a few presents," I replied, then I looked coldly at Sam. "And take out the four perimeter goons that were gonna make you soon." You fucking suck at your job, I thought. Direct your hate to a mirror, not at me. "Is he cuffed or tied?" I asked.

Sam gulped, glanced away a second, then back. "Tied. They've... they stood him up and had his arms above his head a few ti---"

I turned my head back to Jody. "I don't have any way for us to communicate once Sam and I get closer---" 

Sam started to interrupt, but I cut him off with a back-handed slap and it stunned him. 

"Shut. The. Fuck. Up. This was your best. Congrats. My turn." Back to Jody again, now winding my hair up in a top knot and pulling an elastic from my wrist to secure it. "So if we aren't back with Dean in ten minutes, you get the hell out. The jeep's just on the other side of this clump of trees, in another cul-de-sac. Keys are under the mat."

Jody nodded slowly and silently, absorbing what I had said. She knew why. The sheriff needed plausible deniability if things went awry.

Sam had kept silent, too, so I sat back to look at both of them. Good. Both had expressions of concern mixed with focus. I'd have preferred all focus, but I'd take it. I had already prepped my rifle with the suppressor - and used it, by that point - and was now attaching the scope as I continued.

"A surveillance contact of mine confirmed nine people, including one that was stationary - Dean. Minus the four on the perimeter, we've got four to go. There's a picnic table below us in the side yard." I looked at Sam. "That's where we start." 

I unzipped and took off my shoes, Jody looking on, staring at their scraped and muddied state wistfully. Sam and I crept down, crawling the last yard or so to the picnic table. There was a generator humming nearby, but the floodlights weren't being used, so we had better coverage than I'd hoped for, despite the bright moonlight. But these kidnappers were far from pros.

The ones on the perimeter didn't have walkies or earpieces, so the ones on the inside likely had no clue they'd been downed. I had a decent line of sight through one window on the side of the house that we faced - left completely uncovered - which let me see the doorway into the room. Had an even better line across the front porch. I continued to be in slight awe at these dumbfucks - they'd actually turned on the front porch lights.

I set my rifle down beside me as Sam and I got into crouched positions. I pulled out the remote trigger I'd stuck in the top of my dress that was being held by my strap and handed it to him. Then I pulled a second from the other side, setting it gently on the table.

"When you pop that," I whispered, "we wait one minute. If anyone runs out, let me take them. Then we pop the second." I pointed. "Dean is against the opposite wall of this room. You're going to go through this wall and get him."

I heard the intake of air as Sam was about to speak, and I quickly reached out and squeezed the hell out of his arm.

"I brought the good stuff. Thermite breach. They'll be distracted by the first one. Do you have a knife?"

"No."

I hiked up my skirt to the holster, handed him my switchblade. "Do not stop. Do not stop cutting rope. Do not stop moving with him. I have eyes on the only way in and out of that room. If you see my laser sight, do not stop. If you hear gunfire, do not stop. Do you understand me?"

"Yes."

I balanced my rifle atop the picnic table. Got into mindset. Just another mission. Just another breach and capture.

I was in a goddamn cocktail dress.

Silence. Nothing but Sam and I quietly breathing. I watched one of them come into the room. Waited til he walked back out. It was the only activity for several minutes. 

"Pop it."

Moments later, a horrific bang from the other side of the house. We could hear footsteps pounding around crazily. I grinned. Morons.

One suddenly ran out onto the porch, holding a semi in an ineffective manner, cigarette hanging from his lips, head swiveling around. I could see the whites of his wide eyes as they searched for an answer. I had one for him.

ZIP

That's five. 

I directed my aim back through the window and onto the doorway of the room. "Anything?" I whispered.

"No."

I handed him the other trigger; voices carried from the far side of the house.

"Pop it."

After its detonation, I could see that the hole it made - taking out part of the window as well - was plenty substantial for Sam and Dean to get through. Cheaply made overpriced shithouse. Gotta love it. The voices faded - they were either coming around or heading back inside. Either way:

"Go."

Sam went, and fast, too. While he was freeing Dean, I spotted movement.  Someone was coming around to the side yard from the rear of the house.

Six

As soon as I'd gotten my first glimpse of Sam making his way back to the hole, the last two appeared at the doorway to the room. I saw the open-mouthed gasp of the one in the rear when he spotted the laser, heard his impossibly high-pitched scream when the blood spurt from the one in front splattered across his face.

Seven

But he scurried away, just as Sam had made it to the hole with Dean. They stumbled off the drop, both falling briefly to the grass under what was left of the window, but regrouped quickly. Dean seemed to be moving under his own strength fairly well. I didn't have time to be glad about that - one more cockroach to exterminate. Sam guided Dean to my position. 

I handed him my rifle. "Get to Jody. One of you cover me. Go."

Thank god, Sam just took it and went without a thousand questions, and I removed my pistol from the holster, shot out those stupid lights, then crept onto the porch.

And now, I was walking back out of the motel bathroom, clad in Sam's shirt, which hit me right below the knees. I had to admit, it was incredibly comfortable. Hopefully it would distract me from the cheap, scratchy sheets. I had gotten a room where Sam had holed up when he'd come for Jody's help earlier. Didn't feel like going to her place, wasn't up to explaining why I'd been so distant.

Dean had refused to go to the ER or to Jody's - that, and the occasional grumbled curse was all he would say, and not a word of it was to me. After Jody helped get him into Sam's room, she hugged me so hard, it almost hurt. And as she pulled away, she looked at me so sincerely, it almost made me cringe. Even more so when she spoke.

"I truly do love..."

Oof.

"...those shoes."

Why do I doubt her? 

"Get out of here," I advised with a grin.

So that left me and the Winchester boys. Dean waved off everything Sam offered - food, a bath, painkillers - all he wanted was to go to sleep. I had stood quietly, leaning next to the door, holding my shoes in one hand, rifle in the other. After Dean had closed his eyes - still frowning as he turned from me - Sam tried to adjust his covers, but Dean slapped his hands away. Sam gave up, straightened his bent-over posture, and passed the frown along.

I sighed, pushed myself off the wall, opened the door. Then I stopped, turned back around. I had my mouth open to eviscerate his ego to the very core, but then thought better of it. Dean had drug him into this, I'd drug him out. It was over as far as I was concerned. Sam should still feel like an asshole for not calling on me. But they could hash out their shit on their own. Not my problem.

"If you get tired of staring into the abyss---" I glanced to Dean, then back to him "---there'll be a drink waiting for you in room 25."

Because god knew I needed one. My husband had faithfully kept a small bottle of tequila in the storage of the jeep and I'd kept up the tradition, replacing it any time I'd used it for a margarita night with Jody. He and I would do a celebratory shot together after every successful mission, back when we’d only been partners a short while. It was after one of those shots, right beside that jeep, after we were showered and back in normal clothes, and after the rest of the team members were all headed to their respective lives, that we'd shared our first kiss.

But here, now, I was going to celebrate with Sam Winchester, who - despite the gentlemanly surrender of a piece of his plaid-and-flannel collection - was still alternating between moderate disdain and mild anger when it came to his expressions and tone.

"Where did you find the last guy?" he asked. He'd poured a drink for me, and I took it from his hand as I came to sit on the opposite side of the queen bed, tucking my legs under me.

"In a downstairs bathroom," I replied, taking a sip.

"Did you ask him anything?"

"Should I have?" I asked in return, and honestly.

Sam's brow creased. "They got Dean while he'd been out looking for you."

I just looked at him. Then I took another sip.

"He's concerned you've gotten involved in something dangerous."

I didn't respond.

Sam shook his head, glanced away, made a little huffing sound as he looked back to me. "You know, Dean really cares about you. That not matter at all?"

Another sip.

"I don't know what all happened between you two when you were at the bunker---"

"No," I cut in. "You don't." 

Sip.

We stared at each other. I was re-thinking the whole sweet and goody-two-shoes label I'd placed on him months prior. There was something... dark... something intense... brewing under his typically affable demeanor. Interesting.

Sam broke the stare, drank what was left in his cup, then moved to get up and, I assume, leave. But before he stood, he asked, "Do you not want to know what they did to him?"

"Will that change what they did to him? Make it better? Make him feel better? Make you feel better, if you have some company in your guilt?"

Sam's jaw tensed up, but he did seem to hear me.

"This is really good, huh?" I asked, lightening my tone, holding up my cup.

Sam's posture relaxed somewhat, and he nodded. "Yeah."

"Sam, you came down here because you didn't want to sit and stare at him, looking at things you can't figure out or fix," I continued, gently as I could muster. "So let's you and me kill that bottle and we can trade war stories til you're drunk enough to walk back in there and pass right the hell out."

He watched me carefully for a moment or two, I suppose in an effort to determine my level of sincerity. Then he poured himself another drink, sat back against the headboard, this time pulling both legs up, plopping them on the bed and crossing them at the ankles. He took a deep breath, then a healthy sip before he met my eye again. "You slapped me."

I nodded slowly, trying not to smile.

Sam looked back to his drink. "I think I needed it," he admitted.

Now I did smile. 

"So, what do you want to hear? Wendigo or vampire?"

I chuckled. "One of each, please."

It wasn't until we were nearing the end of our best stories, as well as the end of the bottle and dancing at the line of sobriety, that Sam's mood seemed to shift to that darker place again. Dark, but honest.

"I have a hard time getting what he sees in you," Sam stated.

I raised my eyebrows. "Golly gee, Sam. Thanks?"

Sam laughed. "I didn't mean---"

I laughed, too. "Yeah, you did!"

"No!" he insisted, and while he was sitting himself up straighter against the headboard, managed to slosh the last of the tequila in his cup out, onto, and rolling down his undershirt. "Oh shit," he muttered.

I took his cup from him as he stood. "It's just an undershirt."

"No, I'm bummed about the tequila!" Sam replied with a wide smile, which was obscured briefly as he pulled the wet shirt over his head and tossed it to the side. He flopped back down on the bed again.

Dean was well-built, but christ-on-a-cracker. I clearly had no idea what had been lurking under baby brother's exterior. I chugged the rest of my drink, begging it to burn its way down and kick in quickly so my epiphany wouldn't show on my face.

Sam picked up the bottle but I shook my head vehemently. "No no no no, sir," I said, setting our cups on the bedspread. I made a gimme motion with my hands and he grinned, passing it over. "You have wasted, but I am benevolent," I informed him.

"Oh, yeah?"

"Mmm-hmmm. The last of this will be distributed equally." I unscrewed the cap and Sam observed as I carefully poured. I lifted them up to eyeball them once, adjusted the amount again. I nodded my head. "That'll do," I stated, handing him a cup, then holding mine toward him. "Last call. Got a toast?"

Sam thought for a second, then slowly shook his head and met my eye. "Nope."

"Nope, it is."

We did our shots, then Sam stacked our cups and leaned a little to set them on the nightstand.

"Oh, whoops," I commented, feeling the empty bottle bump against my calf with the movement of the mattress.

Sam was just leaning back when I shuffled in his direction, still on my knees, then leaned across him, planting a hand on the mattress to balance myself, putting the empty bottle on the night stand as well.

I'd shuffled onto the front hem of the shirt, feeling cool air as the back got hiked up, but my lack of any other garment didn't register until I felt Sam's fingertips ever-so-barely touch the bottom curve of the ass cheek closest to him, then slowly trail down the back of my thigh before it faded away. Though I'd set the bottle down, I didn't move, hand still planted on the mattress to the side of his hip.

"I saw you," Sam said, barely above a whisper, his fingertips repeating the touch, leaving no doubt that I'd misinterpreted or imagined anything. "That night. I saw you and Dean by the staircase."

I tensed slightly, brought my other hand down to grip the mattress. I needed the support. Not because I was drunk. Because I didn't feel as uncomfortable at his touch as perhaps I should've been. Because of what had already started between Dean and I.

"Did you?" I asked, not looking at him. The tracing from cheek to thigh and back up continued, meandering a bit to my inner thigh on the next pass.

"Mmm-hmmm."

"Do you think I should feel embarrassed?"

"No."

Sam's fingers pushed the hem of his shirt a little higher, exposing more of my ass. I glanced over at him. He was watching his fingers.Up, over, down, up, over, down.

"Do you think you should be embarrassed?"

A tiny smile and chuckle. "I don't know."

"Are you?"

"No." The smile faded. The shirt hem got pushed a little higher. The fingers drifted a little further. "I got so hard," he whispered, still watching his fingers.

I wanted to hear more. "Tell me."

"The sounds the two of you were making..."

Sam's fingertips pressed a little harder, no longer on the back of my thigh, only going from my cheek to my inner thigh now.

"...how Dean's hand was moving in your pants..."

The shirt hem was resting on my lower back, my ass completely exposed now.

"...how you were grinding your pussy."

My eyes fell closed briefly, and I shivered when, on that last word, Sam's fingertips barely grazed that very area. A glance downwards showed me perhaps Sam did know what Dean saw in me. And I tilted my head towards him again. "Were you as hard as you are now?" I asked.

He met my eye, his hand still moving, though not as quickly, the fingers lingering as they moved to the center, drifting up between my cheeks then slowly moving back down. "Harder."

"What did you do?"

"Went back to my room." Another pause at my ever-dampening entrance, then back up, over my taint, over my asshole, back down.

"Then what?"

"Thought about the two of you fucking."

"While you stroked it?"

"Til I came."

The corners of my mouth went up. "But you just can't figure out what he sees in me."

Sam's eyes flashed and a wicked little grin came to his face. "I know you wouldn't kiss him, he told me. And that you didn't fuck him."

I narrowed my eyes. "Then I guess you know all there is to know. Sammy."

Sam's grin disappeared, but his touches continued, albeit more firmly, more the pads of his fingers than just the tips.

"Why'd you come down here?" I asked, trying to take a little edge off my tone.

"Why didn't you kiss him?"

"Why'd you come down here?" I asked again, harshly, because fuck my tone.

"Why didn't you fuck him?"

I rolled my eyes, sighed, then began to move to sit up when suddenly Sam came forward, pressing his lips into mine. Though he'd made the bold move, he suddenly hesitated. And I immediately got annoyed at this boy and whatever game he was trying to play.

I pushed my lips back against his, deepening the kiss. Sam responded in kind, and I opened my mouth, letting his tongue in to wrestle with mine. I pivoted, bringing my body around, one knee on either side of his thighs. He gripped my bare ass in his huge hands, squeezing with every thrust of our tongues.

"You're a good kisser," I breathed out when he moved his lips down my neck. Sam licked his way back up, bringing his mouth to mine again. I sucked on his bottom lip. A small groan emerged from his throat. As I pulled away, letting my teeth pull on the lip a bit as I did, I whispered, "I didn't kiss Dean because I didn't want to. I'm kissing you because I do want to."

Sam looked at me with hooded eyes. I felt his erection pulse beneath me. I leaned in for another round of kisses, and this time they were deeper, rougher, more tangled than before. He wrapped his arms completely around me, pulling in tightly, pushing my naked pussy directly against the rock-hard bulge.

"Ask me," I whispered when we pulled back from the kiss and were each catching our breath.

Sam didn't hesitate. "Do you want to fuck me?"

I looked at him seriously. "Will you promise to put it all the way inside of me?" I pushed my pelvis into him and his eyelids fluttered.

"Yes," he gasped.

"Will you pound me til I come?"

"Oh god yes," Sam practically moaned, gripping my ass so tight I knew I'd have bruises.

"Stand up."

I moved off of his lap, raising back up on my knees as he stood. The tip of his cock was peeking above the waistband of the track pants. I gently pulled the pants down, licking my lips, getting wetter and wetter in anticipation. Sam's cock was thick, and while it wasn't the girth of Dean's - because, fuck, whose was? - it was easily an inch longer. I knew immediately it would hit me in every conceivable spot.

While I briefly contemplated attempting a blow job, I just couldn't wait any longer. I felt slick drops beginning to run out of me at just the sight. So I gently gave the tip a little lick and a tiny kiss. And then I turned around, still kneeling on the mattress, raising my ass and presenting my wet pussy to him. I heard an audible gasp, but then Sam seemed to recover quickly because the next thing I knew, he had entered me.

"Oh, fuuuuck," I groaned at that first long stroke, willing myself not to push back into him, wanting him to take the lead, see what the younger Winchester would be bringing to the table.

"Holy shit," Sam gasped, gripping my hips as I felt him adjust his stance. He began to pull back but paused before he got a rhythm going. I glanced over my shoulder. "Did you mean it?" he asked in the lowest register I think I'd ever heard his voice take.

"Mean what?"

"Pounding?"

I grinned, and then turned away from him once more, this time extending my arms in front of me and grabbing up two fistfuls of bedding, preparing to brace myself. "Sam. I don't say anything I don't mean."

The next thrust was deeper, and on the third, he was completely ensheathed, those luscious hip bones grinding into me. "Oh yessss," I heard him hiss, just as he ramped up the speed.

Before long, my entire body was being jolted as Sam took my instruction to heart, pounding, swiveling every now and then so he made sure his dick hit every square inch. He was back to kneading my ass cheeks, pulling them apart, squeezing them back together, thumbs running over and pressing around my asshole.

I leaned down more, resting on my forearms and arching my back, now unable to resist pushing myself back onto him, matching his thrusts. Better braced, I used one hand to unbutton the borrowed shirt, letting it fall open so my breasts could move freely, and my erect, sensitive nipples wouldn't keep scraping across the fabric. Then I moved my hand lower. 

Sam moaned as I made a V with my index and middle finger, placing them so he felt an extra bit of pressure with every pump. "Stop, I don't want to come yet," he managed, and then he pulled out, grabbed me by the waist, turning me around and pulling me up to face him.

As Sam crushed his mouth to mine again, our tongues angrily battling each other, he slid his shirt off of me, throwing it away, then wrapped his muscled arms around me, smashing our naked bodies together. I put my hands on either side of his face then drug them down, pressing into his pecs, over his nipples, over every taut ab. Right as I was about to stroke his cock, he looked at me and spoke.

"Did you do this with Dean?" Sam asked, his voice husky, his eyes seeming almost angry as he pulled me closer, running the fingers of one hand between my ass cheeks again, pulling moisture from my pussy to my taint and asshole, letting his finger linger there, stroking over it.

And though he knew the answer, I confirmed it for him. "No."

Another quick trip, gliding down, returning with more wetness, pressing his middle finger more firmly to my asshole. "Did Dean touch you here?"

"No."

Now pinning my body against his with his left arm, Sam reached between my legs from the front with his right hand, jamming his first three fingers inside my cunt all the way to the knuckles, making me yelp in surprise. He brought the dripping fingers out, up and over my hip, smearing the wetness down my crack, swirling his middle finger on my asshole, pushing in with every rotation til he was slowly fingering my ass, in and out, increasing the speed.

I clutched onto his shoulders, as he let my torso go. I was groaning into his neck as he grabbed my right cheek with his now free left hand, pulling it to the side, opening me more, gliding another finger inside, scissoring, up, down, side to side, fast and rough.

"Did you let Dean stretch your asshole?" he asked, pumping and pumping, his cock even harder between us.

"No!" I gasped, digging my fingers into his shoulders, and he captured my mouth in another wild kiss. 

He eased his fingers out gently, but then clamped down on my hips as he ended the kiss to look at me dead in the eye. "I'm going to fuck you so hard," he stated, then pushed me backwards.

Leaning back on my elbows now, I looked up to him with a cheshire grin. His face was set in such an authoritative mode, he looked nothing like the little brother I'd associated him with in my mind. He stared down at me, eyes roaming over my breasts, then to my crotch, then back to my eyes as he gave his cock several fierce tugs. He grabbed a pillow from the head of the bed, doubled it over.

"Raise your hips," he ordered.

"Yes, sir," I replied, and he stuffed the pillow under me, tilting my pelvis completely off the bed. I let my knees fall open, the cool air hitting my hot core and making me shiver. 

He gave his cock another few strokes, eyes never leaving my crotch. "Spread your legs."

I complied.

"Wider."

I did as I was told.

Sam reached down with both hands, studying every fold intensely, running his thumbs over, around, then between the puffy outer lips, pointedly ignoring my huge, engorged clit. He ultimately planted his knuckles on either side of my entrance, his thumbs continuing to keep my folds and lips to the side, pushing my hips even wider, opening me completely. 

"Fuck, you've got a pretty pussy," he muttered. Then he met my eye."Did Dean go down on you?"

"He licked me clean after I made myself come," I replied with a raised eyebrow, fully aware that I was taunting him. "Does that count?"

The side of Sam's mouth twitched up briefly before he broke eye contact and practically dove between my legs, thrusting his tongue in-and-out of my cunt, dragging it up and finally, blessedly, paying much-needed attention to my clit.

I sighed, letting my head fall back as he suckled at it, his lips as delicate as his thrusts were rough, thumbs still keeping my swollen lips to the side so he could occasionally run the tip of his tongue over and between every fold, swirling it around my entrance before plunging it in again.

And then Sam moved to a kneeling position beside the bed, putting my boosted pelvis more on his eye-level. I missed his face and his mouth, wanted it back in my pussy, and made a little whimper sound involuntarily. He didn't make me wait. Returning his lips to my clit, he again sucked at it, then up, over, under with his tongue, though when he moved down, he changed his pattern, going further, spreading my cheeks, running his warm tongue over my tender asshole for several moments then moving back up, kissing along my inner thighs til he stood. Then there was one last order as he moved to kneeling in front of me on the mattress:

"Put my cock in your cunt."

I reached down, barely had the tip in my entrance when Sam shoved it completely inside of me. I had no footing, nothing to brace myself with, so I extended my arms up and behind me, grateful I was close enough for my palms to make contact with the headboard. I was practically seeing stars, my breaths coming in ragged pants now. I was so sore already, and all I wanted was more.

Every pump was rapid, and every third or fourth, Sam would pull almost all the way out before slamming in deeper, jack-hammering my core relentlessly. My breasts were bouncing wildly and suddenly his huge hands were on them, squeezing, pulling, catching my nipples between his fingers, pinching, twisting. Nothing was gentle, nothing was tender, and I was grunting, craving more.

The pillow was yanked away and I felt Sam's body press down on top of me, felt his hands snake up, pull mine away from the headboard, wind his fingers through mine, his grip tight, felt his mouth crush into mine, his hips continuing their work. I wrapped my legs around him, dug my heels in below his ass and he moaned into my mouth as the shift in position let him sink even deeper.

Our eyes locked as I began to match his rhythm, the pace slowing a bit as I clenched purposefully around his cock every now and then, delighting in how it would take his breath away. A tiny bead of sweat ran from his hairline down to the tip of his nose. I grinned, and his stoic expression wavered as he grinned back.

"What?" he asked.

"You need a break."

Sam shook his head. "No way," he replied, nearly completely breathless, but increasing the speed of his thrusts as if to prove me wrong.

"Mmmmm," I hummed in pleasure, but I had a request. "Let me ride you?"

For his answer, Sam let go of my hands, putting his arms underneath me, then flipping us over so I was on top. Sitting up, he scooted us down to the end of the bed, planting his feet on the floor, keeping his arms around me and his cock inside me the entire time. We kissed like maniacs again, then just as I was beginning to find a rhythm, Sam whispered in my ear.

"What else can we do?"

I chuckled, swirling my hips, and replied, "This not doing it for you?"

"I just..."

I stopped. What the fuck was it about me riding either of these men that seemed to bring things to a weird halt? I was going to get a complex at this rate. "What?" I demanded, looking him dead in the eye.

"I.. I... I want to do things with you that... that..."

Shit. The return of the Aw, Shucks Sam.

"That's different than what Dean and I did?" I finished for him.

A timid nod.

I climbed off of him.

"Wait, no--" Sam began.

"Here's one thing that's different: Dean and I didn't talk this much about Dean when I was naked with Dean and playing with Dean's cock and grinding on Dean's fingers - get it, Sam?"

Sam seemed dejected, and I was so angry at myself for thinking I could fuck my way out of feeling... feeling...

Feeling so helpless seeing Dean so hurt.

Because I did ask the eighth goon why Dean was taken. Assured him I'd let him go if he was honest. He told me they were hired to take him and rough him up because he'd been asking around about me in all the wrong circles. That Dean was bringing attention to me, and there were other parties who did not appreciate it. The crew would get a bonus if they drew Sam out too, triple pay if they brought back proof of death on both Winchesters. I told the goon I believed him before I pulled the trigger.

So, yeah. It was me. Dean was hurt because of me.

And now I felt like seeing Sam hurt more.

"As a matter of fact - how many times have you said my name tonight, hmmm? Because I lost count of how many times you've said your brother's name about five or six 'Deans' ago."

Sam remained completely quiet, looking at me with glassy eyes.

I picked his shirt up off the floor and tossed it to him. "Thanks," I said flatly, then went to the bathroom and turned on the water.

I heard the door close a few moments later.

I climbed in the shower and burst into tears.

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