#(ok my wording might get confusing but im RAMBLING OKAY)

[p1x1x]

me pushing myself further with my art drawing really cool perspectives and whatever with the Duo and then i turn around and make lame cutesy ship art waaahhah 😭😭😭

dont read the tags on this if you havent watched gbc i just ramble spoilers 😭 just uhh screaming yknow. mostly mmnn but i like the other characters i swear its just these guys are making me insane

[chrispotatos]

quit - chris sturniolo

summary: you had a stressful day at work so chris suggested you quit.

warning: none unless you're allergic to having chris as your bf.

a/n: i may or may not be projecting

a/n 2: i might only be able to write quick little stories like these then write smut and angst on the weekends because it takes me longer to write those generes than cute little fluffy shit.

my whole week was bad and it consisted of the same cycle on repeat work, eat nap. i could hardly see my boyfriend and my friends because of my busy schedule and when i wasn't with at work i was in my apartment trying to recollect myself.

today was friday and i promised chris i would come over to their house and stay till monday rolls around.

don't get my wrong i was itching to get there but i wanted peace and quiet. after all my social battery was drained and it felt like any minute i could cry if someone asked 'what's wrong' the feeling of taking my anger out on my friends and boyfriend because of a stressful day made my emotions subside by a little so something like that doesn't happen

i arrived and didn't hear anything i walked up the stairs and still no talking, laughing, nothing.

i took that as a sign they weren't here at all maybe they were filming. i leave chris a text letting him know im there.

i go down to his room and pick out some clothes that got cleaned from the last time i was here. the tub in nicks room was the only one that was here so i used it, putting in epsom salt and a bath bomb with a lack of scent so my headache doesn't get even worse.

when my bath was done i went to the kitchen and got ice cold water then headed back to his room.

i tried picking a movie but my thoughts flooded with what happend today and how my manager was yelling at me even though i was confused and needed clear instructions.

the thought made tear unwillingly fill my eyes and fall, it stung remembering the harsh words the way she made me feel small and disrespected.

i heard the triplets voices, slight bickering the front door closing after, i knew chris was gonna be coming to his room shortly after so i went under the blankets.

my predictions being correct the door to his room opened and he called for my name. i hummed as a response, that not being enough he came over to my side of the bed peeling the blankets off of my body.

"y/n, baby are you okay?" he asked worry coating his expression i cover my face crying more.

that question always tipped me over the edge "no im not okay, my boss- megan no maya i mean-" a frustrated grunt is all i could get out from all the clouded confusion. "it's ok take your time" he rubbed my arm being patient with me and thats what i needed right now.

"-my manager is a bitch and she was yelling at me. im tired and i don't wanna be mean but im so stressed out" i explained, it was more of a ramble with some words getting mixed together cause of the speed i was talking in.

"im so sorry" his arms wrapped around me, pulling me towards him, and rubbed my back while whispering comforting words to me, reassuring that everything will be all right.

"you should quit" he suggested i shook my head no, i couldn't quit it wasn't gonna work if i did my life would only get worse.

"no one should get treated that way especially you, you don't deserve that and it shouldn't have a toll on you. it's fucked up"

i draw back from the hug by a bit to see the sympathetic look on his face, he really felt bad for me and i know he couldn't wrap his head around why i wouldn't just quit if im being treated in such ways.

"it's not in my cards to just quit" he smiled unbeknownst of what he was thinking i reciprocated an awkward smile "I'll take care of you, you can move in with us" he stated it wasn't an offer he wanted me to do it.

"im not letting you do that" a humorless chuckle left my lips. chris wiped the tears that were left and kissed my forehead "yeah you will" he muttered giving me a endearing smile taking the glass of water off the night stand pressing the glass to my lips, i took a few sips then he put the glass back down and tucking me in.

"I'll come back in a few, i just need to talk with matt and nick real quick then take a shower and I'll be all yours for the rest of the day"

i nodded from where i was, snuggling into the blankets "love you y/n" he said on his way out even if he couldn't hear me i said it back.

[itsjustrosee]

hiiii idk really what to call you bc yeah anyways i have a request fir u but feel free to take ur time with it idm at all seeing as ur blog is relatively new and u probably have a bunch of asks and stuff because ur first two fics were absolute masterpieces like literally anyways im rambling im so sorry uh

(u can skip that part) So my request is basically where minho and fem!reader are really good friends and shes like a track-hoe and basically has a really flirty personality so she flirts with all her friends and minho always gets flustered uh or something like that and one time he sees her flirting with idk one of the gladers and he gets jealous thinking that shes dating (said glader) and then she confronts him about it and they kiss and live happily ever after :D

sorry this is super long and confusing dont rush to do it take ur time !!

Ok I'm honestly getting so impressed with these requests, they are so thought out and unique and I'm literally living for it. Btw my name is Rosalyn so feel free to call me that or sometimes I go by rose but address me however you'd like <3 Anyways thank you so much for the request and all of the praise, I appreciate it sm!!

Anyways, this was a super cute prompt idea I absolutely love it, so I hope you enjoy!

JEALOUS (Minho x fem!reader)

Context: pre Thomas, read above for summary ^

Warnings: spice

Word count: 4K

! I proof read but there might still be spelling mistakes !

When you arrived in the glade being a girl, it was quite a surprise for everyone.

Most of the boys tried to be pretty accepting, and after a while, you managed to get along really well with everyone. But if you're being honest, it was all due to your rather, flirty, personality.

That, however, you can't really be blamed for. I mean, you couldn't help it, it was just the way that you were!

It did, however, prove to be a slight problem during your first few months in the glade. You can't blame the rest of the boys for taking your subtle flirty gestures the wrong way, if you were them, you'd probably take the things that you said the wrong way too. So by no means was it their fault for thinking you liked them. But unfortunately, you never reciprocated their feelings, which only confused them more.

Anyways, the first person to understand this was Newt. He was always okay with your overly friendly personality and never actually got the wrong idea from you. That's probably why he became your first friend in the glade, and why when he said you should become a track hoe, you accepted his offer immediately. He, along with the rest of the track hoes' were rather chill and you enjoyed spending time with all of them.

You would consider yourself the closest with them out of all the other people in the glade, so you often hung out with them during the bonfires and dinner. However, you were relatively close with just about every boy in the glade, given your personality, but regardless, you naturally gravitated towards everyone.

It took a couple months for everyone to come to terms with your behavior and rather flirtatious personality, so after about five months, everything was going pretty smoothly. Under the given circumstances and all. Being trapped in a maze was by no means easy, but you were making the most of it. You had developed a good daily routine, and you can only imagine without the structure you and the other gladers had built for themselves, you all would've gone mad by now.

Part of your routine was waking up early. Alby had made Gally and the other builders build you a hut for obvious reasons, and Gally was happy to do it if it meant getting on your good side. You enjoyed the privacy from the rest of the boys but since you had a hut, you had a bed. A bed that was impossible for you to force yourself out of in the morning. After a couple weeks though, you got into the right mindset and started waking up right when the sun started peaking over the maze walls.

You woke up early so you could get a head start with some of the work in the garden. This meant you just spent a bit of extra time plucking out weeds and getting extra fertilizer from the deadheads. You did this to lightly the load that you and the rest of the track hoes' had to do, and you also did it because you just enjoyed being productive.

But one of the secret advantages of waking up early to tend to the garden was seeing the runners leave right when the maze doors opened. You took the brief amount of time they had before leaving to talk to them because they were all very busy people, and getting any opportunity to have a quick chat with them mattered to you. Especially because it meant you got to talk to Minho.

You never admitted it to anyone, but Minho was one of the only boys in the glade that you actually felt attracted to. You couldn't quite understand why, but you always felt drawn to him.

Maybe it was because he was held so high by all the gladers, even though none of them were ever able to talk to him because of how busy his schedule was. He was in the maze all day and when he finally returned from a long day of working to find a way out of the maze for himself and everyone else in the glade, he would be in the maze room. He was working, constantly. Which is why you felt special whenever you had the chance to talk to him. Even if it was just for a couple seconds.

Or maybe you liked him because he still got flustered whenever you talked to him. You would always try to be as respectful towards him as possible, but your flirtatiousness always found a way to shine through. And he seemed to be the only boy who hadn't gotten over how flirty you were, even though every other boy knew that that was just the way you were.

Needless to say, you had a pretty big crush on him, one that you tried your hardest to deny. But you really couldn't help it, which is why you chose to become friends with him. You decided to settle with that because you were sure he wasn't interested in being anything more. Even though Newt often tended to think otherwise.

But you still couldn't help but think that it was just so cute how whenever you talked to him he would fumble over his words, or get as red as the tomatoes you were tending to whenever you even touched him.

However, whenever Minho acted all flustered like this, he would curse at himself relentlessly, wondering why he was as awkward as he was whenever he was near you.

The truth is, he had been down horrendously for you the second Alby pulled you out of the box. At first, he chalked it up to you just being the only girl and well, he couldn't exactly remember the last time he had seen one of those. But as the weeks went on, his feelings for you only deepened. He never saw a point in telling you because every boy who confessed his 'love' to you got rejected. Part of that made him feel glad though because he knew that just about none of the boys in the glade were good enough for you, and he felt happy knowing you would never like any of them. But the downside to that was Minho thinking that he would never have a chance with you.

That never stopped him from wanting to talk to you though. He would purposely make sure to stop by the garden to talk to you before he headed into the maze. Whenever you weren't in the garden, he would check the deadheads to see if you were there. Once he found you, he would make some excuse by saying he was just taking a walk in the woods to clear his head before going into the maze.

He really didn't know why talking to you mattered to him so much, but it just did. And today was no different.

You were nealing down next to garden beds that Gally and some of the others had just built. It was a relatively new addition to the garden and you had just finished filling them with soil and fertilizer yesterday. So you were eager to begin planting some of the last remaining seeds that were sent up from the box into the beds.

You could always tell when a month would pass by when you ran out. The box always sent up a certain amount of seedlings and by the time you ran out, a month would pass and the box would come back up, providing you with another month's worth. So as you planted the last seed in the pouch, you knew that in a few hours, a new greenie would appear from the box, symbolizing the start/ end of yet another month in the glade.

You stood up, dusting off your knees as you congratulated yourself on your wonderful planting skills. But your eyes wandered away from the garden and onto Minho, who was now walking your way. Your heartbeat quickened as you saw him. He arrived slightly earlier than normal because you noticed that you hadn't seen any of the other runners with him, but you also knew it would only be a few minutes until they came to join him.

Minho mentally prepared himself while he walked up to you, telling himself that he was going to be normal today, and he wasn't going to start stuttering like an idiot.

At least that's what he tried telling himself as he approached you, clearing his throat, "Hey (Y/N)," Minho said while resting his hands on that runner's vest he always wore on top of his signature blue shirt which complimented each of the defined muscles on his chest.

"Hi, Minho." You said with a smile on your face that couldn't help but make Minho blush. "What brings you out so early? The maze doors don't open for another five minutes don't they?" You questioned. You had gotten pretty good at telling time around the glade, even without a watch like Minho.

"Oh yeah, I just thought that maybe I'd get over here a little earlier," Minho said with an awkward chuckle as he tried to smile back at you.

"Ah, I see," you said before continuing, "Is it cause you wanted to spend a little extra time talking to me?" You said with a giggle, trying to make a little light-hearted joke as you stared up at Minho with puppy dog eyes.

Minho however, did not take this as a joke. He began blushing, hard. "Oh no that's not why- wait no that's not what I meant. Like I love talking to you but that's not why-" Before Minho could continue to embarrass himself further, you cut him off.

"Minho I was just joking." You said with a laugh, trying your best to reassure him because clearly, he was mentally freaking out. You couldn't get over how cute he was when he was like this. You were always so used to seeing him act serious and stoic in every other situation, but whenever it came to you, he was a mess.

"Yeah- right. Of course." Minho said awkwardly, trying his hardest to laugh off the situation. He felt his cheeks heat up as you continued to look at him for a moment while taking off your gardening gloves. He couldn't help but take the time to admire you and the features on your face while you did so.

You had your hair tied into a loose braid that was slung over your shoulder and onto your chest. His eyes glanced up and down your body to see that you were wearing a pair of low-rise jean shorts paired with a V-neck shirt that clung to your curves and exposed your chest slightly.

You noticed his eyes drift to your chest and laughed silently to yourself but didn't say anything else to him. You normally didn't mind having the boys in the glade stare at you because, at this point, it was to be expected. But you couldn't help but feel butterflies in your stomach as Minho looked at you, and you couldn't help but feel happy that you decided to wear this shirt today.

"If it makes you feel any better, I love talking to you too Minho." You joked, even though you definitely meant it. Your voice broke the slightly awkward silence that had filled the air while you put your hand on his bicep. No matter how many times you've made this gesture toward Minho, it never fails to surprise you with how firm his muscles are. It also never failed to make Minho physically stiffen and make his mind go completely blank.

You absentmindedly began softly rubbing Minho's bicep with your thumb. You were genuinely curious about how he had gotten this strong. Was it all the running he did? Did they have weights in the glade that you just didn't know about? You weren't quite too sure what it was but you were loving it.

You snapped out of your thoughts though as you saw the other runners approaching the garden. You looked back up at Minho with a soft smile as you took your hand off of him, "Well I hope you have a good run today Minho." You said while trying to snap him out of whatever trance you'd unknowingly put him in.

"Thanks," Minho said. At least he didn't stutter while getting that out, but then again, he only said one word. But it was a new record nonetheless.

You greeted the other runners with a smile and a wave while Minho's feet stayed planted in front of you, unable to move.

"We'll meet you at the doors Minho." Ben said as he and the others jogged past you and him, snickering at the whole situation.

You stared at him again for another moment, expecting him to move but something in him couldn't. "You should probably catch up with them right?" You ask him, hoping that you didn't just cause the glades best runner to short-circuit just because you touched his bicep.

"Right, yeah- yeah you're right," Minho said while letting out a soft chuckle.

"Be careful alright? I'll talk to you later." You told Minho as you patted him on the back while he began to walk past you.

"Okay yeah. Talk to you later." Minho said, still very flustered about what had just happened. He was still trying to process it all because even though you had been touchy with him before, it was never like this. There was something very different about it this time. He thought about it for the rest of the day while he was running in the maze, and even when he came back and ate dinner.

While Minho was showering before heading to the bonfire, he couldn't help but wonder if you also felt it, if you also felt the same energy in the air that he felt. Or if he was just overthinking an exchange between the both of you that hadn't even lasted more than five minutes.

The truth was that he wasn't the only one whose mind kept racing back to that moment.

You couldn't stop thinking about it either and it was distracting you this entire day. You didn't know what was so different about it this time, but you could feel something shift between you and Minho during that simple exchange. You brushed it off as much as you could and decided to turn your focus on showing the new greenie around.

He seemed to have taken quite a liking to you and was practically following you around 24/7, which you didn't mind too much. He seemed like a sweet kid who was around your age, behaving toward you the same way every other boy had toward you in the glade at one point or another.

As the day continued, the bonfire began and you found a seat with a group of about ten people, the greenie being one of them. He chose the seat right next to you and after a couple drinks, he had his arm around you. In your eyes, it really wasn't that big a deal. You thought it was sweet that he was opening up so soon, and you had to admit he was pretty funny. You couldn't help but laugh at a lot of his jokes.

But Minho wasn't too big a fan of how the new guy clung to you. While everyone gathered at the bonfire he couldn't help but notice how the very obviously drunk boy, had his arm around your shoulder and it was driving him crazy. He had been hearing whispers from the other gladers about how you were going to start dating him and the mere thought of it made Minho's blood boil. Even though all the comments that had been made about you and the greenie were jokes because everyone knew you well enough to know you were just being friendly, Minho didn't know that.

You were in the middle of a conversation with the new guy and the rest of the group when you spotted Minho walking in your direction. At first, you got excited, you had been waiting to talk to Minho this whole day. But then you looked at him and noticed the stern, almost angry expression he had on his face. Your confusion only grew as he stopped right in front of you, his build towering over you as you stared back up at him.

"Hey, can we talk for a second?" Minho said through gritted teeth. The amount of anger in his voice was prominent, and you couldn't lie, it was kind of hot. Minho was not a hot-headed person, so seeing him be anything other than stoic or flustered was new for you.

"Uh sure, is everything alright?" You ask with genuine concern. You didn't know what could've gotten Minho this angry so you were relatively worried.

"Yeah, it's fine. Just- can you come with me?" Minho said quickly, and it was obvious to you that it, whatever 'it' even was, was not fine. You took Minho's hand anyway as he helped you up from your seat.

Everyone in the group was staring at you, just as confused as you were while you told them you'd be back soon. You shot the greenie a wave and you could've sworn you saw Minho roll his eyes and scoff as you did so.

Minho led you to the edge of the deadheads and stopped by a nearby tree. There was silence between the both of you and you were waiting for Minho to say something. When he didn't, you spoke instead, "So what is this all about?"

Minho crossed his arms as he began to reply, you couldn't help but notice fury in his eyes as he spoke, "I should be asking you that."

"What?" You questioned, slightly dumbfounded and slightly confused by Minho's harsh tone. He'd never spoken to you in such a way, so now you were really racking your brain trying to figure out what you could've done to piss him off so much.

"Oh don't pull that oblivious klunk with me (Y/N)." Minho sneered.

"I'm not acting oblivious, I don't know what you're talking about, seriously." You said while putting your hands up in surrender, and it was the truth, you really didn't know what he was talking about.

"I'm talking about you and the greenie. How you guys were all over each other. Are you dating him or something?" Minho spits out, venom and jealousy lacing his words.

You couldn't help but laugh as he said this but you quickly realized he was being serious. "Wait you're kidding, right? Me and the greenie? No Minho he's just a friend." You said in an attempt to reassure him.

"Well, it didn't look like you were just friends. Not by the way he had his arm around you." Minho blurted out.

"Are you getting jealous Minho?" You asked with a grin on your face. Minho stayed silent for a moment after you asked, so you spoke again, "Why would you care anyway? It's not like you like me like that or anything." Annoyance in your voice this time. Who was he to act so pissed off about it if he didn't even like you?

"Who said I didn't?" Minho questioned while staring dead at you.

Now it was your turn to be silent.

"You like me?" You said as you just stared at Minho for a moment longer, wondering if you had really heard him correctly. A sliver of hope surged through you as you thought of the possibility.

Minho quickly realized what he had just said and just stared at you. Did he really just say that? Why did he just say that? His words got stuck in his throat and he stayed quiet.

"Minho answer my question."

"Yes, okay? Yes, I like you. So what if I do? Are you going to reject me the same way you reject every other boy?" Minho asked with genuine curiosity.

Before you or he could say anything else, you kissed him.

You hadn't even realized how long you had been waiting to kiss Minho ever since you laid your eyes on him. But as your lips merged into his perfectly, it all just felt right.

Minho melted into your touch as you wrapped both of your arms around his neck and he pulled you in as he placed both of his arms around your waist. The kiss you both shared was gentle yet passionate as you fell deeper and deeper into his warm embrace.

You pulled away for a moment to look Minho in the eyes, "I like you too Minho." You said with a warm smile that almost made him pass out. Minho's heart melted as he heard those words come out of your mouth. They were what he'd dreamed you you eventually say to him, and he couldn't think of anything else to do at that moment than to kiss you again.

The kiss between the both of you deepened and only became more sloppy and desperate as if the both of you couldn't get enough of each other. You allowed his tongue to enter your mouth and taste every bit of you. You could tell that he must've had some muscle memory from his life before the maze because he definitely knew what he was doing as his tongue wrestled against yours.

Minho pushed you onto a nearby tree and moved one of his hands from your waist and to your ass. You moaned softly into his mouth as he did so and you pushed yourself into him further, which only caused Minho to harden against you.

"Oh, there you guys are. I assumed you guys got everything settled?" Newt asked as he interrupted you and Minho. You both pulled away for the second time, breathlessly, and stared at him for a moment.

"Oh yeah- everythings um, settled. I guess." Minho said while turning around to face Newt. Newt gave you a look and you just gave a thumbs up and an awkward smile back to him.

"Alright well, I just wanted to let you know (Y/N) that the greenie was wondering where you were," Newt said with a smirk while scratching the back of his head.

"Oh, well- just tell him I'm busy or something." You replied hastily. You had waited long enough to let Minho know how you felt and you wanted nothing more than to turn all of your attention back to him now. Minho looked at you and grinned, obviously very pleased with your response.

"Will do," Newt said as he began to walk away and back up to the bonfire to join everyone else. You blushed as you put your hands up to your face and buried your head into Minho's chest.

"God that was so embarrassing." You said, your words muffled in the fabric of Minho's t-shirt.

"Oh come on there's nothing to be embarrassed about. If anything it's good that that shuckin' greenie'll get the message." Minho cooed as he wrapped one arm around your back and used his other hand to stroke your hair. He planted a kiss on your forehead as you took your hands away from your face and wrapped them around Minho's waist. You looked up at him again with a goofy grin on your face, which only made Minho grin at you back, "What, what is it?" He chuckled.

"You never struck me as the jealous type." You stated while tilting your head slightly before continuing, "Not like there's anything wrong with that though."

Minho only smiled back at you and brought his lips to yours once more, holding you in his arms as if he found the one thing that he wanted to hold onto for the rest of his life.

alright yall here is yet another Minho fic

I hope you guys liked it and tysm @minhoshotharness for the request!! It was so fun to write and I hope that you liked what I did with the concept.

plzplzplzplz keep sending me these requests guys, I literally LOVE writing them

[ittybittybumblebee]

Long story short: 90s Trigun Ending is good. Just rushed 😭

Yeah it IS good and also rushed. The conclusion/sort-of-conclusion-but-doesn't-quite-feel-like-one-entirely (?) Is good , It just could've been clearer! Thats my only gripe. Im alright with vague endings as in you don't know what happens after, BUT i'd like to know whats happening during??? The ending? As its going on??? That is all.

Ok if youll excuse me rant rambling but i just wanna say i have 2 say.

In MY opinion it wouldve been a more satisfactory vague ending if he LEFT his brother where he was. That leaves just enough mystery wihtout the confusing element of BRINGIN HIM BACK if he was planning on helping his brother get better from his i hate all humans disease id ont think hes gonna be cured by a few gunshots and going unconscious vash sweetie have you thought this through why are you BRINGING him BACK TO THE TOWN. RIGHT NOW. Not even a hesitation on that part? . In the credits it even shows him walking up 2 meryll and millie with his brother on his shoulder BABYGIRLLLLLLLLL TAKE HIM AWAYYYYYYYYYYY 2 HELP HIMMMMMMM SOMEWHERE ELSE DONT BRING HIM THERE WHAT ARE YOU DOING.......

Leaving him there wouldve been more satisfactory as it wouldve symbolized either LEAVING him to die OR live , stepping away. which Vash saying hes gonna start going by his own words and not Rems anymore would make more sense by.

And ...It could symbolize, with leave for speculation on what happens to Knives after leaving him. if his brother does survive, Knives, is probably yet again, going to try to get at Vash. To repeat it all. Vash will have to keep playing against his brother at this cyclical game to survive himself and protect the people he loves (which is all of em bc this guys got the biggest fucking heart on the planet) but neither are going to quit.

OR Knives has a change of heart, after being spared again. It wouldnt happen immediatly though this cunt needs a lot of work lmao. I can imagine years later he could come back to Vash and say something a long the lines of I Learned Some Things That Day That Told Me I Was Actually Wrong, and then go dissapear off to soemwhere else to start again (?) Not likely to happen though. It would be Nice. And Satisfactory. But not likely.

But EITHER WAY . NOW Vash is going to try and do what his heart says anyway and try his best which is all he has done and can do. And he IS going to get hurt again and he might hurt someone else again but he will do his Best and thats okay. And hes Learned that. Now. Sort of adjacent to being able to finally forgive himself. Learning to forgive himself for the mistakes. Forgive himself for who he couldnt save and what he couldnt or didnt do.

Thank you for coming to my TED talk

[carouselofrats]

All for the Best (No It Isn’t)

“Oh, how I pity you, Roman.” He chuckled, turning his back to the Side and feeling his own eyes begin to water as he lost control. The Lord of the Lies was only so good. It felt physically painful to walk out the door as he heard Roman break out into sobs behind him.

You’ll never get to hold him in your arms.

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Ao3 Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/32061952

Pairing: Roceit

Word Count: 2017

CW: Janus has a panic attack but he gets comforted don’t worry :)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Janus wasn’t sure exactly when he’d fallen in love with Roman. All he knew was that at some point, over all of the theatre scenarios and courtroom flirting, he’d fallen head over heels in love with the wonderfully dramatic prince. It was terrifying, to suddenly care so much for another. Because of this, it was both a comforting and depressing fact that he could never act on his feelings. For one, Virgil would kill him. He was already suspicious and hateful enough of the snake, he didn’t even want to consider the backlash that would come if he tried to romance Virgil’s best friend. I used to be his best friend .

There were times, of course, where he did wish for more. When the light of the imagination’s stage caught Roman’s face at the perfect angle while they traded lines; When they accidentally brushed hands or shoulders while talking over one of Roman’s scripts and he had to force himself not to linger; When Roman had had a nightmare and chosen to come to his room for comfort.

He finally reached the other facet’s door and knocked politely, as he’d become delightfully accustomed to doing over the past few months. There was a shuffling on the other side before a visibly nervous Roman opened the door.

“Hey Jan! Come on in, sit wherever you’d like!” Okay, now he was nervous. Something was off, very off.

Janus sat down on the corner of Roman’s bed, glancing around the familiar brightness of his love’s friend’s room. Roman gently sat next to him, causing the deceitful Side’s gaze to snap to him. Roman sighed.

“I asked you here today to tell you something important.” Janus’ heart clenched. Please don’t be what I hope think it is.

“I’ve been wanting to tell you for a while. We’ve had a rocky friendship, what with all of the stuff Thomas’s gone through, but I'm so happy that we got to the point we’re at now. You’ve become so incredibly important to me, Jan. It’s incredible how passionate you are about your role--and that’s coming from the literal embodiment of passion--and how much you care, even though you don’t like everybody to know it.” Roman chuckled a bit, Janus giving an exhale of amusement as well as the fear in his heart grew.

“I guess what im trying to say…” Please, god, yes no. “...is that I’m in love with you, Janus.” No. No, no, no.

Roman’s nervous yet earnest gaze travelled up from his lap, where it had drifted earlier, to Janus, searching for his reaction. Janus had short-circuited, his entire body frozen.

No no no, this wasn’t supposed to happen. How could he possibly love you? You can’t say you feel the same, no matter how much you want to, you know that. You’ve already hurt him before, if you tell him it’ll happen again and then you’ll really lose him and he’ll never look at you with his beautiful eyes or smile at you with his beautiful smile ever again. He can’t really love you. Just let him lose his infatuation. It can’t be real love. It might hurt him now but it will be way better than what you would inevitably end up doing to him.

No one could ever love you.

Janus forced his face into a smirk and his voice into something stable. He allowed the mask of the villain to slip over his face. You’ve always been the villain.

“Oh, Roman. You really have fallen, haven’t you?” he crooned. Hurt confusion slowly seeped into Romans face. He desperately pushed down the flash of guilt he felt.

“What are you talking about, Jan?” Roman spoke, his voice quiet and hurt.

“Did you really think that I could ever love you?” Janus hurt laughed. Roman’s eyes began to water, tears slowly falling down his cheeks. Janus stood up, forcing his hand not to shake as he patted Roman’s shoulder for the last time.

“Oh, how I pity you, Roman.” He chuckled, turning his back to the Side and feeling his own eyes begin to water as he lost control. The Lord of the Lies was only so good. It felt physically painful to walk out the door as he heard Roman break out into sobs behind him. You’ll never get to hold him in your arms.

As soon as Roman’s door was safely shut behind him, Janus sank out to his room, collapsing on the bed as sobs overtook him. It’s better this way, he tried to tell himself, he can get over it quicker and you’ll save him the heartbreak. It’s fine. Everything is fine. His heart, which felt like it was physically burning, said otherwise. Janus could barely bring himself to move, weakly shoving his shoes off and wrapping himself in his blankets as he sat there, sobbing. At some point his hat had fallen off. He didn’t care. He lost track of time, trying to tell himself that it was all for the best, you’ll get over it, though he knew he wouldn’t.

Suddenly, Janus heard his door burst open. He was filled with the urge to make himself presentable or even look up but he only succeeded in reducing his sobbing into a gasping panic.

“Why the fuck would you do that to Roman you- Dec- Janus? What the-” the intruder spoke. Janus’ panic only increased and he couldn’t breathe he couldn’t breathe help

Of course, it had to be Virgil. Now he knows and he’s seen you vulnerable. You fuck everything up, don’t you? Can’t go one day without hurting somebody else you stupid, ugly snake.

“Oh shit.” He felt the bed dip.

“Can I touch you?” Janus breathed rapidly, flinching when he felt a hand on his shoulder.

“Okay, okay, just calm down, Jay. Breathe in for four.” Janus tried, gasping, only succeeding after multiple attempts.

“You’re doing great. Now hold your breath for seven.” He did the same again.

“Okay, now out for eight.”

The process repeated until Janus could breathe somewhat normally again. He finally lifted his head up from his knees, feeling pitiful, to look at Virgil. After a few seconds of silence, the anxious trait spoke.

“What- What happened?” Silence.

“Did… did you reject Roman even though you like him back, Janus?”

His sniffling quickly turned to sobbing again as he threw himself into Virgil’s arms, the Side swiftly hugging him back once he got over the shock. Janus’ other arms came out too, gripping the other like a lifeline.

“I had to- he doesn’t- he doesn’t want me. I’ll h-hurt him. Just like in the courtroom. O-or when I c-called him the evil twin. Like- like I did with you,” his voice shrank to a whisper.

“It- it just hurts so bad. Make it go away, make it go away.” He gripped Virgil’s hoodie tightly, sobbing harshly once again. He felt Virgil’s chest rumbling but he heard no words. Suddenly, Virgil started to get up, detaching Janus’ hands from his hoodie. He curled back in on himself.

He’s probably gone to tell the others how pathetic you are.

A few minutes passed, Janus only calming himself slightly. He heard a few sets of footsteps enter his doorway. They’ve come to laugh at you. The bed abruptly dipped beside him and a new set of arms wrapped around him. He opened his eyes and saw a white and gold sleeve. He froze.

“Roman?” He spoke in a small voice.

“Shh, it’s okay, darling. You’re ok.” Roman spoke, rubbing circles into Janus’ back. His voice was thick with emotion, he’d obviously been crying and Janus’ heart crushed with guilt at the notion, more tears and gasps leaving him. He began rambling apologies, all six of his arms wrapping around Roman like they had Virgil.

“I’m so sorry- I’m sorry, I’m sorry.” Roman shushed the snake as he spoke, holding him tighter. “I never thought you’d feel the same way so I just b-bottled it up and then when you t-told me I didn’t know what to- to do and I’m so sorry”

Roman suddenly stilled. “So you really do? Love me back?”

Janus had run out of tears, left occasionally gasping for air. He leaned back and sat up, looking Roman in the eye and nodding before sheepishly looking away. Roman put his hands on Janus’ shoulders, causing the Side to stare back at him.

“Why did you lie about it, my love?” he spoke, his eyes full of earnest concern and love.

“I- you don’t want me. I-I’ll hurt you again. I always hurt them. And then they leave. I c-can’t-” but Virgil, who had been awkwardly watching the emotional exchange from the doorway, spoke up.

“We both hurt each other, Jay. It wasn’t all your fault.”

“Oh.” Janus leaned back against Roman as his thoughts swirled rapidly in his head. “Does this mean… that I can love you? I promise I’ll never try to hurt you and-”

Roman cut off Janus’ rambling with a kiss. Oh. Oh. Maybe Roman really did love him after all.

“Okay! Um, everything seems under control here so I’m gonna go,” Virgil hastily exited, closing the door behind him.

They pulled away from each other, both smiling. Janus wiped some of the leftover tears from his eyes, frowning at the wet marks on his gloves.

“I guess I’ve really ruined my reputation in front of you, huh?” Janus gave a light chuckle.

“Your big, tough reputation was ruined for me the moment you showed me your Scooby-Doo collection, you big nerd.” Roman teased affectionately.

“Like your Disney movie collection is any better!” Janus quipped back, Roman batting at his arm in retaliation.

“At least I have a variety to pick from!”

“At least my room isn’t a shrine to a billion dollar corporation.”

“My room only has 101 Disney posters! That’s not that many!”

“Maybe in your opinion.”

“Well, at least I don’t walk around in Hufflepuff-colored garb everyday!”

“I’m severely wounded, you take that back right now Roman Romano Sanders.”

“I refuse!”

“I can feel the dishonor of your insult burning me. I’m dying.”

“Stop being so dramatic!”

“I can see the light now.”

“Okay, fine! I'll take it back!”

“Nope, too late. I’m already in the afterlife. No, wait, I’m in Hell. It burns! It burns so much! But…”

“But what?”

“Nothing can ever burn me more than your insult! The shame! The shame…”

“Will you stop it if I finally agree to let you show me Scooby-Doo: Mystery Incorporated?”

“Suddenly I’m alive! They sent me back.”

“Mhm.”

“They said that all of you were just so lost without me. Especially you, my dear Braveheart.”

“Well, I can’t argue with that, can I?”

Roman pulled Janus in for another kiss, both of them sighing contentedly. In that moment, everything was perfect. Neither could wait for the many more perfect moments sure to come.

[ambivalent-anarchy]

Body |Peter's Turn

Part 2 of 2 (Part 1 -> here)

Masterlist

Gender: Female

Pairing: Peter Parker x reader

Warning: none (suspicions of cheating but no actual cheating lol just a lotta funny miscommunication)

Anon requested- can I get a one shot where the reader does the body positivity trend with the new megan thee stallion song and the reader is insecure about how ppl will react to it?? Most importantly how peter will react to it?? K thanks

A/N- Part 2 cuz I immediately knew what I wanted to do with this the second I got the ask. (Peter's turn)

---------------------------------------

When Peter heard that you'd been nervous about showing him your video, he freaked.

He thought he'd done something wrong. That maybe he gave off weird vibes or that he'd said something before that made you think he wouldn't have liked it. Which definitely wasn't true. He liked everything you did.

Well, except that one time you got bangs. He didn't really like the bangs.

Anyway, Peter felt like he needed to show you that he was okay with it all. That he was down with anything you wanted to do or show him.

He looked in the mirror early that morning and decided.

Peter wanted to show what he had to offer.

He looked down at your TikTok "body" video on his phone. He could do something like that, right? He was completely clueless, but he could at least try his best.

He pulled out his phone and texted the one guy he knew could help him out.

~~

PeterParkour🤟: i need u to teach me the lip bitey thingy

PrinceHarry👑: bro what

PrinceHarry👑: ???

PrinceHarry👑: what is that

PeterParkour🤟: like when u make yourself look all cool when u bite your lip

PrinceHarry👑: ...

PrinceHarry👑: oh

PrinceHarry👑: OH

PrinceHarry👑: 😂

PrinceHarry👑: lmao why do u wanna do that???

PeterParkour🤟: im trying to make a video for y/n

PrinceHarry👑: what kind of video 👀

PeterParkour🤟: NOT LIKE THAT

PeterParkour🤟: well actually

PeterParkour🤟: kinda like that

PrinceHarry👑: PETER WHATTTTT

PeterParkour🤟: ill explain later which penthouse are u at tonight?

PrinceHarry👑: the one closest to ur apartment

PeterParkour🤟: ok ill come over

~~

Now, on your end, school was kicking your ass.

You weren't failing, but the amount of make-up work you had was so far through the roof that you might as well be. And the teachers were hellbent on making it the hardest they could.

To put it short, you needed a break.

And the second MJ heard your tired, irritated voice over the phone, she was on her way over with chips, dip, popcorn, and movies. If there was anything to calm you down, it'd be a nice movie.

MJ had gone to your kitchen to make the popcorn and you were laying on your bed finishing up some homework, when you got a phone call from Harry. "Hello?"

"I didn't know you and Pete were sending nudes."

You paused. "What?"

He carried on in a nonchalant tone. "I mean, I never took you guys as the types to do that, but damn, you two really surprised me. Dude's really over here asking for tips and everything-"

You sat up in your bed, alert and highly confused. "Okay," you said, taking a deep breath" ....what, again, the fuck?" Harry continued to ramble but one sharp scolding tone stopped him. "Harry, shut up."

He paused on the other side of the phone and then suddenly his voice came back, extremely hesitant. "...wait, was I not supposed to say anything? Did I just fuck up?" He sighed. "Oops.."

"No, Harry tell me what the hell you're-" BEEP. You looked down and saw that he hung up.

Just then, MJ opened the door, hands full with freshly popped popcorn. "Okay, ready to get the movie started?" She walked to the bed when she noticed that you were practically frozen in your spot. "Um, [Y/N]?"

You looked up with glossy eyes and she immediately knew that something was wrong. "Dude, what happened?"

You frantically shrugged a bit, and then let out a shrill laugh, half confused and half preparing for the worst. "Peter's- um... apparently... sending nudes to...me....Harry... someone?"

"What?"

-

Peter had finally made it to Harry's penthouse.

"So, nudes?," Harry chirped, very amused as he opened his door.

"What nudes?," Peter asked as he stepped into the living room. "What are you talking about?"

Harry paused. "Wait, what were you talking about?"

Peter only stared back in confusion, leaving Harry to pick through his own confusion fragments of information. He quizzically looked at him. "But-..the texts?"

"Oh!," Peter laughed, moving to sit on the couch. "No, I wanna make one of those thirst trap TikToks for [Y/N], that's all," he explained with a shrug and a bashful smile. "She made one for me, now I wanna repay the favor."

"Dude!," Harry hissed out. "You should've just said that!"

"Well, how about you just need to stop making assumptions," Peter said with a slight frown, not understanding why his friend was so wound up.

"Well, I had to since you kept being so vague!"

Peter rolled his eyes and started towards the refrigerator, if not to actually get something to drink, getting away from a crazed Harry for two seconds would be enough.

When he sat back down, Harry started to speak again. "So, what did you need me for?"

"Oh," Peter mumbled, shifting in his seat. "Well, you know how to do that sort of... stuff, right?"

"You mean looking like a fuckboy?," Harry snickered. "Yeah I'd say that's well within my reservoir."

Peter gave his typical bashful look. "So... teach me your fuckboy ways?"

Harry grinned. "Peter. You have no idea how long I've been waiting to hear you say that."

-

You held your phone in your handle, looking at Peter's contact number hesitantly.

"Just text him," MJ said with an eyeroll.

"But what if it's nothing?! I don't wanna be the crazy girlfriend!"

"But what if it's something?," MJ added. "Cuz if you put it off now, and it actually ends up being something, you'll be even more miserable than you would be if you just found out now."

You took a long breath and nodded. "Okay then I'll text him."

"But if it is nothing, you'll look pretty stupid jumping to conclusions like that."

You sighed. "So, no?"

"But then if it's something-" she continued, getting deeper underneath your skin with each word. "-you'll look even more stupid because you could've found out sooner and you didn't."

Finally quieting down from her rambling, MJ noticed you glaring at her. You sighed.

"So...do I or do I not text him?"

"Oh nah, dude. I mean, I wouldn't. After all, I'm not saying that I think it's something," she said with a shrug. "I'm just saying on the off-chance that it is, you'd be in bad shape."

"Okay can we please stop playing devil's advocate with my life?!"

"You know I love watching you squirm [Y/N]." "Anyway, I'm sure Peter's not cheating. The boys were probably just doing something dumb and Harry just explained horribly."

You bit your lip. "You sure?"

She shrugged. "Pretty sure."

-

"Okay, now lower the camera just a little," Harry instructed. "You gotta show the v-line, but still leave enough for imagination."

Peter dropped his arm and his posture and shot Harry an incredulous glare. "Harry, if you focused this much in school I wouldn't have to tutor you."

Harry rolled his eyes. "Whatever. Just keep going."

This was the third picture taken and though it was out of his element, Peter strangely felt very confident with what he was doing. He never saw himself as ugly, but he certainly never saw himself as hot either. Not like Harry. But looking at himself now, with Harry's corny chain necklaces on and his hair scruffed up in a way he's not used to, he knew one thing for certain.

He looked good.

"Okay," Harry said. "Now the last one, actually needs to be some dumb picture someone took of you in your gallery."

Peter frowned. "Huh? But I'm on a roll here."

"Yeah but the whole point is that all of these pictures weren't supposed to be taken directly beforehand," he pointed out. "Since you're breaking that rule, you gotta throw in a cute dumb one to throw off your scent." He smirked. "Also, you gotta show the ladies and gents that you have a softer, funnier side."

Peter stared for a moment. "..why do you have this down to a science?"

"Says the science geek?," Harry retorted.

-

Peter spent the night at Harry's and they drove to school early in the morning. He was glad that it was Tuesday because your schedules made it so that you'd both have lunch together every other day.

"You sure she'll like it?," he asked Harry as they walked down the halls before lunch.

Harry rolled his eyes with a laugh. "You know, she asked me the exact same thing for you when she made her video?"

Peter nodded quietly, still feeling a bit down about you feeling bad about showing him that video. "Yeah, I know."

"Jesus," Harry laughed. "You insecure little dweebs are made for each other!"

"I'm gonna take that as a compliment..."

"As you should," Harry said with a shrug, as nonchalant as ever.

The two boys walked into the lunchroom and to the table they knew best. You and MJ were already there.

Peter could tell just by the look on your face that something was wrong. "Hey," he greeted cautiously. "Is everything okay?"

MJ glared at him and he looked to Harry, whose clueless face was not helping.

Finally, you looked up and sighed. "Pete, be honest. Are you cheating on me?"

What.

"What?!"

You examined the utter shock and terror in his face. It didn't look fake. He looked saddened and scared as he began to ramble. "No no! I would never! What even made you think-!"

His eyes caught yours as you looked over towards Harry sittting next to him. Peter turned toward Harry and then looked back to you in confusion. "Wait, you think I cheated on you with HARRY?"

MJ bursts out laughing next you. "Jesus..."

Harry scoffed. "Well don't sound so excited Peter, jeez."

You let out a small chuckle but kept your eyes on Peter. "It's just... Harry called me and...said something about nudes and-"

Peter's face grew even more contorted with bafflement. "Nudes?!"

Harry hit his forehead, finally understanding what was happening. "Ooooooooh, me and my big mouth..."

All eyes turned towards him. "What, Harry?"

He sighed. "This is all just a big mix-up." Harry nudged Peter. "Just show her the thing dude."

"What thing?," MJ asked.

Peter fished through his pockets. "Okay," he mumbled, a bit shaken up by what happened. He took his phone out and handed it to you. "Here."

You looked up and saw Peter looking down at you, waiting for your reaction.

"So, this is what you were doing yesterday?"

He nodded.

You blew out a long breath of relief. "You're not cheating."

"God no, babe, I'd never cheat on you," he cooed, stepping over towards your seat. "I know you were really nervous when you showed me yours, and so... I thought I should repay the favor."

He didn't even have time to breathe before you were on him, wasting no time in bringing your lips to his. He kissed you back, mildly aware of the people in the lunchroom around the two of you, but he still didn't care.

Peter pulled away with a smitten smile until he noticed blood on his lip. He wiped it away with his hand and frowned when he realized it was not his own.

You almost asked what was wrong when you noticed him looking at you strangely, but MJ beat you to the punch.

"Dude, you have a bloody nose!"

You gasped, picking up a napkin from the table.

Harry laughed. "Did you really just get a horny nosebleed?"

"Horny nosebleed?," MJ snickered.

"That's not a thing," you scoffed. "...is it?"

"It actually is," Peter corrected, blushing profusely and rubbing his neck. "Just glad to know you thought the video was hot."

"It was really hot," you gushed.

Peter grinned and pulled you close. "Aww babe."

MJ rolled her eyes. "Okay lovebirds, get a room."

-------------------------------------------------------

Lol I know this was pretty trash but I was just trying to get to sleep while I was finishing this

Tagging: @allegra-writes, @allegra-soleil, @yumings , @hey-its-grey , @spideyyeet , @sunkissedspidey , @tommyunderoos , @chaoticpete , @sovereignparker , @thesherlockianavenger , @bubblebucky , @eridanuswave , @ithoughtthiswastwitterbutfr , @kidney9-9 , @gwenvrse, @the-weird-bisexual, @kelieah

[holdingforgeneralhugs]

Hiya!!  I am so happy you enjoyed your ship. I enjoyed writing it.

I just wanted to ask for a ship!! So to start i’m 5’9, brown hair, and green eyes. Personality is uh starting off i'm an infp and 3w4 who hides their emotions (or tries to and fails horribly). Important thing or something??i’m jewish. Cottagecore? More like shtetlcore. Hobbies include reading or writing poetry (or my fic), english discipline riding, and studying torah when i have time. I am quiet and usually observing people if no one is interacting with me. Loud noises scare me it's kind of funny. My emotions are very deep??like i just feel emotions much deeper than the people around me irl. But i’m okay with that. I don’t really get angry and if i do i go into a panic attack instead of anger. So if im angry i just cry and have to walk myself through a panic attack. Which leads to me not being able to stand up for myself. If something is wrong I won’t tell anyone unless i trust them. I hate pda. I’d be fine with like being cuddly in private. Probably because my love languages are quality time and words of affirmation. But in a more positive light i’m super sarcastic but sometimes my humor is just dry. Ok but heres the thing if i have a crush on someone i literally will laugh at any joke they tell. I laugh when im nervous as well??like one time in a zoom call i won a raffle in front of 400 people i kept laughing from being scared/nervous. It’s kind of funny. I love animals and want to major in veterinary pre med. I love mules, horses, and donkeys so much omg they're just too sweet.Also i love the history of the american civil war. Children are so cute???i love children. I like when people make me feel more extroverted, i’m constantly feeding off of other’s energy. I just match their energy. I can be pretty spontaneous around those who make me happier as well. This felt so much like a ramble. Anyways, thanks :)

Aaahhh Henya I'm so glad you sent one in and tysm for mine I loved it🥰 I ship you with Don Malarkey

You two compliment each other well. He's a bit more extraverted than you but you can't help but he drawn out by his charming personality.

The best sarcastic duo in history. "Really, it's hot, in Africa?" 🤨🤣

He loves your laugh, he thinks it's so cute, so he does everything in his power to make you laugh as hard as you can.

He tells the most stupid jokes ever but you always laugh at them so then he tells even more and its just a mess of you two laughing your butt's off.

He can always tell when your nervous or uncomfortable because he recognises the specific giggle you do, so he always makes sure to hold your hand and let you know that he's there for you.

He knows that you feel things way harder than anyone else, so whenever something happens that he thinks might upset you he always checks in with you and wraps you up in a hug.

He tried to kiss you in public once and when you backed off he was confused and kinda hurt and you couldn't figure out what was wrong with him. So eventually you cornered him and he told you and once you explained everything he didn't mind anymore. "Kisses in private are so much better anyway."

He thinks it's really cute how much you love animals and how your face lights up everytime you stop to pet one.

You and lieb got into an argument once and Don was convinced you'd chew Lieb out. So he was really surprised when you walked off and he saw tears in your eyes so he followed you and went into full blown protective caring mode helping you calm down.

Then you told him you don't feel like you can stand up for yourself, and he was all like "Don't you worry bout that, I'll always be here to fight in your corner." He made Lieb apologise to you after.

Chilling on the couch watching a movie? Perfect

He's always telling you how much he loves you, and how he thinks you'll be the best vet there ever was.

I hope you like it 💜

[in-the-whisper]

I'm sorry if this is a common/stupid ask but I fundamentally don't understand religion and I couldn't imagine believing so strongly in anything, but it seems very nice(?) and possibly even optimistic to have a constant like that in your life. so in the sense I think I have an idea of what religion is, what makes you decide(?) to follow it or believe in it? genuine apologies if this comes across as patronizing or condescending, it's not my intention and sometimes I'm just bad with words ':]

dude you are always welcome here and i will never assume that you are being mean you are very sweet <3 i am very happy to talk to you!

ok so i come from a super different background so it’s hard for me to even imagine like not knowing a ton of people who are religious so i will try to explain and then if it doesn’t make sense feel free to poke me and i will try again. also it makes me happy so dont be scared i will say oh! someone asked me about God! yay! and then i will write a silly tumblr post while making this face -> c: 

okay so one of your confusions seems to be why i would believe in something so strongly. in a way everyone believes things strongly, some even more than me (i mean look at politics and thanksgiving dinner). i think the reason that my relationship with God in particular is something i feel strongly about is because i derived my faith from my natural understanding of the value of my friends and from my understanding of morality.

i love my friends very much (most people do) and the idea of them getting hurt or mistreated makes me very angry (i think people would agree). and you could make the argument that the reason that i care so deeply about people and justice is because of all the stuff ive been through but i did think this before anything bad happened to me really.

there is a difference between atheist (philosophical) morality and Christian morality. for someone who doesn’t believe in God, there isn’t anybody who is more important than humanity who can tell them what to do. if one person does something, and i don’t like it, all i can say is, “i don’t like that,” and not “you shouldn’t do that.” because im not in charge of them. i’m just another person, who am i to go around establishing moral laws for other people?

but what that /also/ means is that there isn’t any “grounding” or like /reason/ for morality or the value of life other than personal preference. this Really bothered me about my philosophy class, every atheist philosopher did this. they all wanted to say that you could make morality for yourself (looking at you nietzsche). But then what happens? What about when someone is killed? or raped? I want to be able to say, “Rape is horrible.” and not just “Rape is horrible in my opinion.” Anything that doesn’t allow for these like absolute, unquestionable, overarching standards of how people /should/ or /shouldn’t/ live just doesn’t add up imo.

Atheist professor of law at Yale, Dr. Arthur Leff, wrote an article on this exact topic called “Unspeakable ethics Unnatural Law.” The entire thing is amazing and I recommend it, but here is the conclusion:

All I can say is this: it looks as if we are all we have. Given what we know about ourselves and each other, this is an extraordinarily unappetizing prospect; looking around the world, it appears that if all men are brothers, the ruling model is Cain and Abel. Neither reason, nor love, nor even terror, seems to have worked to make us "good," and worse than that, there is no reason why anything should. Only if ethics were something unspeakable by us, could law be unnatural, and therefore unchallengeable. As things now stand, everything is up for grabs. 

Nevertheless:  Napalming babies is bad.  Starving the poor is wicked.  Buying and selling each other is depraved.  Those who stood up to and died resisting Hitler, Stalin, Amin, and Pol Pot-and General Custer too-have earned salvation.  Those who acquiesced deserve to be damned.  There is in the world such a thing as evil.  [All together now:] Sez who?  God help us.

So if I think this is true, if I really believe that death is evil, that rape is horrible, that there are some universally binding and unchallengeable truths about how people ought to live, I have to believe in a God. or i can live in a state of constant existential dread hahahahaha, , I joke but I actually did do that for a while it was pretty miserable.

i think the next question was kind of what made me believe in it? and that is kind of a difficult question because i think in a way Christianity just encapsulates a bunch of things that i already believed, and i just found like a label for them i guess. i also grew up Christian, so for me my experience questioning my religious identity was more like, three people you love are dead why do you still believe in a loving God? Rather than which religion or philosophy do i like the best?

idk maybe they come out to be the same but it doesnt feel entirely the same. i’m still a christian because of sunsets and sunrises and because the world feels beautiful and intentional, and because i’ve been in a lot of pain and it was real. it really happened. it wasn’t in my head (looking at you stoicism). it wasn’t unimportant. there is not if buts ands ors it was just awful and that’s that. so what can explain it? what can explain meaning? only God can.

Christianity is specifically the religion im interested in because it’s the only one i’ve come across that is as internally consistent, historically accurate, scientifically accurate, coherent understandings of the universe.

No other philosophy allows you to grieve. That’s why I believe in God. No other philosophy validates grief that a belief in a loving God, a belief that death isn’t meant to happen, that people are violently ripped from you without purpose and that you are meant to live together forever. It allows for a belief in the value of humanity and grace while also allowing you to believe that things that happen to you that might last with you forever are wrong and not just in your opinion. They were violently wrong, they violated ancient laws of the universe, they were an act of aggression toward God himself.

Ok im rambling now but I will leave you with this, which is what i wrote after finally deciding to remain a christian:

“There are several questions I asked that stopped me from rejecting Christianity.

Where did the universe come from and why does it exist?

Why does our experience involve morality?

Why is there love? (deep love between brothers, self sacrificial love, to die for another love)

Why is there goodness?

There are, of course, answers to these questions under ideologies other than Christianity, but I found their answers to be unsatisfying because to me, the existence of these things screams that there is something more to the universe than an unfortunate accident in a vacuum of uncaring nothingness.

When I listened to music encouraging its audience to live, when I listened to people fight for the lives of those they love, when i watched the sun set, or cried at the end of a deeply touching movie, I would think, “In light of this how can you say there is no God?”

In Christianity I found answers that profoundly satisfied my deepest questions. 

There is a universe because God in his wisdom fashioned it to be a beautiful gift. There is morality because we stand in the midst of a cosmic battle between good and evil. There is love because God’s nature is perfectly loving and the fabric of the knowable universe was woven in his loving kindness. There is beauty and goodness because life wasn’t created to be a void and an unknowable miserable darkness.

The true issue with atheism is that while intellectually and technically feasible, it gives empty answers to facets of life that do not have empty realities.

It forced me to ask myself this question: How can such a beautiful, meaningful, tragic world exist from nothing and for nothing?”

[tinyboxxtink]

Hey so loved your black magic series! I read your post about using REE/Rafael. I’ll read anything you write but this idea to me is RPF and kind of squicks. ☹️ Maybe if you use another character he played? Nevada?! Someone sees “Barba” doing something super bad and they’re all “omg omg” and think it’s Barba? 🤷🏻‍♀️

I hear you, I do. HOWEVER, I made a "Version" of Raul Esparza in this story that is 5 years younger, and...I hate to say it, "more" famous?

IDK I wrote a 'prototype' chapter last night, so I'm gonna put this to you. I assume/hope you're an avid reader and I can gauge the public consensus, but also I want ALL my readers to be happy!!

So here, read this and then tell me if you still find the idea "Squicky".

That goes for anyone else! Maybe I should put my tag list in here....

The way I wrote him though anon, I truly feel in my heart that it's not RPF, because like I said RPF freaks me out as well.

Before you already go in skeptical, let me set up the plot I had planned. {As told to @madamsnape921 in an IM:

the thing was gonna start that someone sees Rafael proposing to the reader, and tells a tabloid that Raul Esparza is engaged to some rando. Because they think that it was him. And then Rafa, the reader and Chloe start to discuss on how either it's a multiverse thing, or a doppelganger thing because it turns out that Rafael and Raúl are very similar, like personality traits and the Broadway dream, except that Raul's childhood was basically the opposite of Rafael's so Chloe THINKS that Raul is Rafael from a "multiverse".

Right and then Raul goes to Rafael's office to confront him and then the reader and Chloe are there to take Rafael out to lunch and they're like holy shit!

And Rafael is super uncomfortable with the idea of the reader EVER being in a show with Raul because obviously they're like the same person and Raul probably has more in common with her

Oh and also Raul is five years younger, and thinner. So then Raul's like you shouldn't listen to him, I could really help you with your career.

Annnnd that's all I have so far.

Okay so read this really and tell me you honest opinion.

Screw it putting the tag list:

Tag List

@madamsnape921

@lolliepopsicle

@chasingeverybreakingwave

@milkshqke

@wanniiieeee

@word-scribbless

@gibbs274

@sassyada

@aprildecker-blog

@bookishfanfic

@stars-in-the-skies-world

@stars-trash-18

@omgsuperstarg

You were walking towards the exit of Central Park hand in hand with your now fiancee, when all of a sudden two giggling girls came running up to you.

“Oh my god!!!!! Raul we didn’t know you had a girlfriend!” One of them started squealing.

“Fiancee,” He corrected. “Wait I’m sorry, what? Did you just call me Raul?”

“Uh...yeah, duh,” One of the girls made a face. “Raul Esparza?”

“What?” You bursted out laughing. “I’m sorry, you think he’s Raul Esparza?”

“Um, we know he is,” The other one crossed her arms.

“Um, no he isn’t!” You wrapped your arm around Rafael protectively, as if the two girls were going to kidnap him or something.

“I can promise you ladies, I am not-- whoever you just said,” Rafael assured them.

“Why are you doing this? Are you trying not to embarrass your lady friend here?” One of the girls made a weird face at you.

“Wha? No--” Rafael tried to defend himself but the girls were already clearly ticked off.

“Wow, I have heard of actors trying to get away from fans but completely pretending to be another person, that’s pretty low Raul,” One of them glared at Rafael.

“Yeah, it wouldn’t have taken you much effort to just take a selfie with us,” The other one added with a scowl.

“I...um--” He looked to you for help, but you just shrugged. You had no idea how to handle such a weird situation.

“I guess we can take one--” He offered.

“Oh no, forget it now,” One girl scoffed.

“Yeah, jerk!” The other one stomped her foot and they both sauntered away angrily.

-----------

“...What the hell was that?” Rafael looked at you in utter confusion and disbelief, you just gave him a “wtf” smile.

“I have no idea baby--”

“Oh my god, are you guys ok?” Chloe suddenly came running up behind you. “What the hell did those teeny boppers want? To rob you with water guns or something?”

“No they-- they wanted a selfie?” Rafael was still confused, trying to figure out what just happened.

“A selfie? With you?” Chloe snorted.

“No-- With Raul Esparza,” You looked at her with a confused smile. It was pretty entertaining to think that your fiance looked like a Broadway star.

“I don’t get it, you said that I didn’t even look like him!” Rafael looked at you.

“I mean I said I didn’t see it, and that you were more handsome,”

“....Yeah well you might wanna rethink that answer babe,” Chloe’s eyes were wide as she handed you her phone. She had googled RAUL ESPARZA, and the images that popped up were-- Rafael’s face.

“Oh my God…” You whispered, showing Rafael the phone. He quickly pulled out his own and started searching for himself. You handed Chloe back her phone and did the same. Pages and pages of articles about Raul Esparza’s shows, and accelaides, and all with Rafael's face plastered all over them.

“He’s….me,” Rafael whispered in horror.

“He looks more like you than you do!” You teased, he looked at you with a very serious face. Clearly he was not ready to joke about this yet.

“Holy shit. This is some multiverse shit,” Chloe muttered as she went through her Google search.

“Excuse me?” You asked her.

“You know, the multiverse theory? There’s an infinite amount of universes in every decision anyone ever makes.”

“Meaning…?” Rafael asked.

“Isn’t it obvious?” Chloe raised an eyebrow. “Raul could be Rafael, if he hadn’t given up on his Broadway dream,”

“Oh my god,” Rafael started laughing. “Chloe, did you get loaded in the park or something?”

“Oh okay, so you have a better idea, big brain lawyer?” She crossed her arms.

“He might not, but I do,” You piped up, showing her your phone.

“Doppelgangers?” Chloe read with a face.

“Yes, it’s a fact that there are 5 people in the world with the EXACT same face,” You continued reading.

“And he just happens to live in New York, where Rafael lives? AND is on Broadway, the one thing Rafael gave up?”

“Look sure it’s a million to one shot that those events would line up, but what’s more plausible: Doppelganger or ‘Multiverse’?” You looked at Chloe, who looked at Rafael, so you turned to Rafael as well.

“...Wha--are you asking me?” He asked.

“I mean it is your face,” You shrugged. “What do you think, baby?”

“I’m leaning towards a doppelganger, sorry Chloe,” He shrugged as well.

“Yeah well, you’re probably right,” Chloe nodded as she read her own phone, still on Raul Esparza info. “Most likely because he’s five years YOUNGER than you,”

“WHAT?!” Rafael grabbed her phone; as he read it, his face fell. “Oh God, no…”

“Wha--What does it matter how old he is, Rafa?” You furrowed your brows.

“Or the fact that he’s clearly thinner and more attractive,” Chloe added with a smirk.

“CHLOE,” You scolded her. “What the ever loving fuck?”

“Well, I’m just saying-- Look at them side by side,” Chloe had a photo of Rafael from some mayor’s ball next to Raul Esparza at the Tonys, both in tuxedo’s. You wouldn’t admit to Rafael but Raul was definitely thinner, and...he looked a lot younger. It was probably Botox or something you were sure, but still….

“Okay but again WHY does it matter--?” You wanted to change the subject.

“Are you kidding me? Y/N-- This is what you want to do!” He gestured to Chloe’s phone.

“....I don’t want Raul--” You started.

“No, you want to be on Broadway though!! And, and what if someday, God forbid, you end up in a show with this guy? He clearly already has a leg up on me compatibility wise, and as Chloe so kindly pointed out, a leg up on me age and attractiveness wise, and--” Rafael started ranting and rambling, talking lightening fast, as he did when he got upset or excited.

“Whoa whoa whoa whoa, back up there counselor,” You put up a hand to his face. “Are you actually insinuating that if I worked with Raul Esparza, that I would magically fall in love with him?”

“Don’t say it like that,” Rafael was triggered by the mention of magic and love.

“Okay but I’m not even saying ‘magic’ magic, I’m just saying-- What do you think because he’s an actor, and younger than you I’m just going to think I’m better off with him? Just because he has your face?” You gave him a small “oh honey” smile as you placed your hands on either of his face.

“No, but if you have to play his love interest, and you spend every day with him, it might blur the lines--” He started grumbling.

“Rafael, baby--” You shook his head in your hands. “I am still in SCHOOL. I am nowhere NEAR being in a Broadway show as a freaking techie, let alone a love interest starring opposite Raul Esparza,”

“Yeah, I mean this guy is huge-- 3 Tonys, 2 Emmys, an Oscar--” Chloe rattled off, but stopped when she realized you were glaring at her. “What? I’m helping!”

“...See? He’s far too famous for me,” You pressed your forehead to Rafael’s.

“Right, and I’m just the lowly ADA,” He muttered.

“Lowly my ass, Rafa,” You hit him playfully. “You are the most respected ADA in all of New York,”

“I’m the only ADA of New York,” He made a face.

“Not true! Just the city,” You beamed, proud of yourself you did some research once you had gotten together.

“My point is Rafael,” You now put your hands on his collar and pulled yourself into him. “You are all the acclaim I need,” You kissed him softly. “You’re my everything, I mean for fuck’s sake you just held a one man flash mob to propose to me! Let’s Raul Esparza do THAT,” You laughed, hoping to make him feel better. As his scowl melted into a smile, you knew you had succeeded.

“That was pretty romantic wasn’t it?” He beamed, proud of himself.

“It was EPIC,” Chloe chimed in, for good this time.

“Your voice is beautiful by the way,” You had forgotten in the midst of all of the romantic hubbub to compliment him. “I’m really sorry you had to give up Broadway,”

“Yeah, well-- apparently some part of me didn’t,” He gestured to his phone.

“Well he doesn’t have me,” You pointed out.

“He doesn’t know what he’s missing.” Rafael grinned as he pulled you into a deep kiss.

“Now can we please just forget about--” You hesitated, deciding not to mention his name again. “Anything else, and just focus on our engagement night?”

“Well, I suppose--” He nodded as he put an arm around you, and the three of you continued to walk through the park.

-------

Across town in a swanky New York Penthouse, an alert went off on Raul Esparza’s phone. He had it set to notify him any time his name appeared in a headline on the internet. He glanced over and picked it up, reading the notification. As he read it, his eyes widened and his face grew red. He stood up and yelled to no one in particular,

“Who the FUCK is trying to impersonate me?!”

[detectivecutiepantsandhisbabyfox]

29 for mazlek cause it sounds like such a hoe thing to say

This took longer than planned, probably because it’s longer than planned. Ive put it under a read more. I hope you like it anon. 

If anyone is triggered by illness, Joe is unwell in this - not seriously though. But there is talk of vomiting so avoid it if that's triggering for you. 

29. What do you mean you’re sick, you’re supposed to be my partner in crime.

Joe’s phone buzzed continuously on his bedside locker, the sound puncturing his temples like a drill.

His stomach rolled as he moved to lie on his side and attempted to reach his phone; memories of last night spent with his head in the toilet flooding back and causing him to flee from his bed for what felt like the millionth time in the last twelve hours. 

As he re-emerged from his bathroom; making a mental note to buy more cleaning products, he heard keys rattling in his front door.

“Joe!” His best friends voice made his head hurt, even from downstairs. 

Walking as slowly as possible so not to jostle his stomach, he peeped round his door and croaked “Up here.”

His voice was shot after last night, throat burning from throwing up so much. 

“Rami” God he sounded pathetic,

“Can you bring me water.......please?”

“You okay?” Rami shouted; Joe heard the water run as he made his way back to bed before he keeled over. Closing his eyes he could distantly hear Rami moving around downstairs.

“Joe?” He peeped open one eye and saw Rami standing over him; beautifully dressed as always, concern etching his face. 

“You look awful Joey.” He handed him the water. Joe sat up gingerly and took a few sips; immediately regretting it as his stomach cramped up.

“Sorry......I........” he dashed into the bathroom again, pushing past Rami on the way. 

“You alright?........want me to come in?” Rami hovered by the bathroom door.

“No.....god no” Joe managed to get out. There was no way he wanted Rami of all people watching him throw up. 

While Joe hugged the toilet, Rami eyed his sheets suspiciously; he could tell Joe had slept fitfully. The duvet was twisted and the bottom sheet had come off the corner of the mattress. By the time Joe emerged from the bathroom, Rami had fresh, clean sheets on his bed and had put the others in a pile by the door. He’d put them in the wash later. 

“You didn’t have to do that.” Joe mumbled weakly, as he slipped between the fresh, cool sheets; sighing as he closed his eyes.

Rami’s hand pressed gently against his forehead, “You’re not burning up......do you think it’s something you ate?” He sat down on the edge of the bed, pulling at a loose thread on Joe’s grey duvet. 

“Dunno.......too sick to go today though.... I’m sorry.” Joe’s hand flapped around looking to squeeze Rami’s in his own. 

“You can’t be sick. You’re my partner in crime. What would Snafu have to say about this?” Rami smiled, grabbing his hand and squeezing softly. 

“Probably the same thing you just said” Joe replied weakly, he attempted a smile; which quickly turned into a grimace as his stomach cramped up again. 

“I’m gonna call Jas and go get you some medicine.....be right back.” Rami’s patted his hand as Joe drifted off to sleep again. 

Rami picked up the sheets by the door and headed downstairs. 

He pushed his disappointment at Joe being ill aside as he put the washing machine on.

The reunion for The Pacific cast was an annual event and this year was the first time Rami and Joe could actually attend together, their busy schedules meaning only one or other of them had been able to show up previously. Rami walked past Joe’s navy suit, hanging up on a hook in the hall. He would have looked damn good in that, Rami thought as he made his way outside. 

“Joe?” Rami squeezed Joe’s shoulder, attempting to rouse him, “I have some stuff you need to drink......don’t want you dehydrating.”

“Mmmmmmm” Joe rolled over, blinking blearily at Rami’s face. 

“You need to go...you ll be late....” 

“I think I should stay.....I’m worried about you.” Rami pushed Joe’s hair back from his forehead. 

“I’m gross Rami.......you probably don’t wanna touch me.......and you’re going.....they’re expecting you.” Joe managed to push himself into a sitting position, sighing heavily at the effort. 

“But what if you get worse?” Rami asked; hands on his hips.

“I ll call you....it’s only..what? A ten minute cab drive away?” 

“What if you collapse or something?” 

Joe took a tentative sip of his mug of rehydration salts, grimacing at the taste, “Then you’ll find me when you get back.”

“Joe that’s not funny.” 

“Rami, I’m gonna be sleeping......please go have lunch and just give my apologies okay. I ll be fine.” 

Rami huffed “Promise you won’t try and go downstairs or anything?” 

“I promise......and thank you....for this ...........delicious concoction.” Joe lifted his mug in gratitude, wrinkling his nose.

“Right well if you’re sure?” 

“I am”

Joe watched as Rami fussed with his blankets, making sure his phone and bottle of water was nearby, adding the tv remote control and a large bowl that that he pulled out from beside the bed. 

“Just in case” he said as he placed it beside Joe on the duvet.

Joe felt a warm, comforting feeling spread over his chest, the crampy, sick feeling in his stomach eased somewhat by the butterflies now erupting in there. This had been happening a lot recently, Joe choosing to ignore it; but today that seemed a lot harder to do. 

A few drinks in and talk turned to relationships; most of the guys were happily married, Rami being one of the only ones yet to settle down.

He checked his phone again as Martin rambled on about some house he was renovating; he couldn’t stop worrying about Joe and it seemed some of the others had noticed his detachment from the conversation. 

“Rami” Ashton patted his arm, “You ok?”

Putting down his phone, Rami sighed and leant back in his chair, taking a long pull of his beer. 

“Yeah......I’m worried about Joe....” 

“He’s a big boy...I’m sure he’s fine.”

“You didn’t see him.....he’s really sick. Maybe I should go?” He raised his eyebrows at Ashton, “Do you think I should?”

Ashton smiled as Brendan rolled his eyes next to him.

“Jesus Christ” he drawled and Rami was whisked back to Australia and Bill Leyden saying the same thing to Snafu’s new nickname for Sledge.

“What?” Rami felt all eyes on him as the table quietened.

“You have some patience man” Brendan continued “12 years is it? Go get your man and quit sitting here worrying about him.”

“What?” Rami said again. He knew he was flushed red and he also knew that what Brendan has said was true.

He pushed back from the table and headed to the bar.

“He’s right y’know.” Martin joined him at the bar, Rami’s second whiskey doing little to calm his nerves. How in fuck did everyone know? Did Joe? Fuck.

“Yeah well it’s not that simple is it? He’s my best friend.” Rami stared at the brown liquid in his tumblr “I can’t risk ruining it.”

“So you happy to carry on pretending? Think of what you might have if you take that risk. Joe’s not an asshole.......he‘ll .....he’ll be good to you no matter what.” Martin clapped him on the back and headed to the bathroom. 

He was right. Rami could have everything he’d ever wanted if he was just willing to risk everything he currently had. Knocking back his whiskey he cursed himself for coming and the boys confusing the hell out of him. He wished Joe was here. 

“Rami!” Ashton shouted from their table near the bar, “Your phones ringing!”

“It’s lover boy!” Brendan yelled and Rami’s stomach plummeted. Joe said he’d only call him if he felt worse, he needed to leave. 

Snatching his phone from Ashton he turned away from the table as he answered;

“Joey” the pet name slipping from his mouth unconsciously. He could hear Brendan snorting behind him and Martin and Ashton telling him to shut up. 

“What’s......what’s wrong? Are you ok? I can come back now...”

“Rami.....stop” Joe sounded exhausted, “I just woke up and I have a weird rash on my chest.”

Rami’s felt sick. A range of horrendous ailments entering his head at Joe’s words. 

“Is your neck sore?” 

“What? No..... why?”

“Meningitis” Rami rambled on “I’m gonna call Jas. Please don’t get up Joey....please.....just wait.”

“Okay” Joe whispered, slightly concerned himself over the level of Rami’s worry. 

Rami sat down heavily into his chair. The boys eyes all immediately focused on his pale face. 

It was Brendan that unsurprisingly broke the silence, but speaking softly and somewhat uncharacteristically.

“Is he ok?” 

Rami’s phone pinged on the table top, as a message came through. Joe had sent a picture of the rash on his chest - Send this to Jas. Might help. X

Ashton’s brow furrowed at the picture.

“Go see if he’s ok please.....I’m worried now.”

Rami nodded “Please can we do this again.... before next year?” 

They all nodded, murmuring agreements and adding “with Joe as well.”

“Im gonna head off then…..Joe....he....yeah.” Rami trailed off.

Martin grabbed his wrist from across the table

“Tell him Rami.”

“But what if he doesn’t feel the same?”

“Oh I honestly don’t think that will be a problem” smiled Ashton. 

Rami crept quietly up the staircase, not wanting to wake Joe from much needed sleep. His bedroom door was open and Rami could see Joe bundled under his duvet through the now dim light of the evening. 

Jas has said he needed to be cooled down to get rid of the heat rash, so Rami tiptoed quietly to the bathroom; leaving another cup of rehydration salts on Joe’s bedside locker. 

After wetting a washcloth with cool water, and wringing it out, Rami padded over to Joe kneeling down next to the bed and peeling back the covers. 

Rami’s stomach flipped at the sight of Joe sleeping, soft and peaceful. When had this started? When had things changed? Rami wracked his memory. Could you fall in love with someone over the space of 12 years and not realise? He stared at Joe’s sleeping face; he was so handsome, and Rami was taken aback by just how attracted to him he was. Rami smiled to himself, maybe he should take a chance? Joe was everything to him, and Rami was now realising he wanted him to be even more. 

“Stop staring at me” Joe’s croaky voice startled Rami into action. 

“Sorry.....I.....Jas said you need to cool down...you have a rash cos you’re sweaty. Here.” Rami showed him the folded wash cloth and Joe turned onto his back.

Joe shivered as Rami pulled down the duvet off Joe’s heated chest and placed the washcloth on his forehead. 

“Okay?.......there’s more salts for you to take there...” Rami pointed to the bedside locker. 

“Oooh yum...” Joe said sarcastically, rolling his eyes and grinning at Rami.

“How you feeling?” 

“Groggy....but my stomach isn’t crampy now....so hopefully I can actually sleep tonight.” Joe peered at Rami from under the washcloth. 

“Will you stay?........I hate to ask.....but....but..”

“Joe......you don’t have to ask....of course I will....”

“Thank you.....oh! how was lunch?”

Rami sat up against the headboard in Joe’s huge bed and filled him in on all the news from their cast mates, answering Joe’s questions but leaving out one very specific conversation. 

“They all send their love....hope you feel better soon.”

“Ashton text me actually....” Joe turned on his side “Said you left early.”

Rami couldn’t look at Joe, he felt his pulse race as he stared out the window at the darkening sky. 

“Rami......” Joe’s hand found his and he squeezed gently.

“You’ve always been so good to me...........too good to me......I.......I......thank you.” Joe sat up. He grimaced as his head pounded at the change of position, but crossed his legs and sat facing Rami.

“Joe.....lie down...” 

“Why did you come back early?” 

Rami searched Joe’s face for any sign that he was messing around. He knew Joe well enough by now to recognise a lift on one side of his mouth that always gave him away. It wasn’t there, his face was soft, open, and as gorgeous as Rami has ever seen it; even with his sickly pallor and bed head. 

“I think you know why” Rami murmured.

“I think I know too......but I’ve been really wrong about things like this in the past so......”

Rami winced, Joe had never had much luck dating. Rami had always been there to pick up the pieces with him. 

“Joe” Rami wanted, he wanted so badly to pull Joe into his lap. 

“You have no idea how much I wanna kiss you right now.”

Joe grinned, his whole face lighting up as Rami ran his hand up his arm; leaving goosebumps in his wake.

“Give me 12 hours and I’m all yours” he murmured as he pulled Rami into a hug. 

“Thank you for today......but.....can you sleep in the spare room because I honestly don’t think I’d be able to keep my hands off you if you’re......in here......”

Joe pulled reluctantly away from Rami’s arms, realisation dawning on what he’d just said. 

“Uuuh I mean.....I don’t wanna make you sick” he stared at the sheets below him, flexing his long toes.

Joe woke early the next morning , the rain pounding against his window. Stretching, he assessed himself for any stomach or headache and found that he felt much better, not one hundred percent. But better. 

Running his hands over his face as he yawned, he sat bolt upright in bed as he remembered who was currently in his spare room and the conversation they’d had.  His body moved without him thinking as he headed to the shower and to brush his teeth. 

As the hot water pounded against his back, he let himself imagine what might possibly happen today.  He’d always loved Rami; but had made himself believe they were just really close friends. He never really thought Rami felt the same though, and Joe wasn’t gonna jeopardise their incredible friendship by telling Rami how he felt. 

Turns out most of their cast mates on The Pacific could see it a mile away. They were both idiots really; all the heartache they could have saved each other. Although Joe laughed to himself as he remembered that anytime either of them had split with someone, they’d immediately gone to each other for comfort. 

It had been obvious to everyone, except them.

Joe knocked quietly on the door to the spare room; it was early and Rami liked to lie in at the weekend, but when Joe pushed open the door he found Rami standing at the window in his boxers. His mouth immediately went dry. 

“Uuuuhhmmmm morning...” Joe croaked.

Rami grinned. “You feeling better?” He asked as Joe moved into the room. His bare toes dug into the soft grey carpet, as his heart beat erratically in his chest.

“Yeah....I am....”

“Thank God” Rami interrupted him as he made his way over to Joe and took his hands in his own. 

“I’ve waited twelve years to do this......I can’t wait any longer.”

“Rami...” Joe whispered as their lips met and they finally fell into each other. 

“Breakfast?…..you feel like you could eat something?” Rami couldn’t stop touching Joe; any part of his body, it was like he’d been starved of it. His fingers were currently skimming the waistband of Joe’s sweatpants where they hung low on his hips. 

Joe’s head was pillowed on Rami’s chest, listening to his heartbeat. 

“I could eat you?” Joe smiled into Rami’s bare chest, breathing in his scent and nibbling at his nipple. 

“Hey!” Rami pushed him away, then pulled his face to his, both hands on his cheeks. 

“I want .........god I want you so bad” he pushed his hardening cock against Joe’s thigh, shivering at Joe’s answering moan. 

“But when you have your strength back......Jas said....”

“Wait....you asked your sister when we could have sex?” Joe began to laugh “Oh my god......” 

“No! Joe c’mon.....you know what I mean......” Rami pushed his erection against Joe again,

whispering in his ear “Just think about how good it will be.....”

Joe flopped onto his back groaning, “I’m gonna need another shower” he added as he pressed down on the bulge in his sweatpants. 

Joe didn’t ever think he’d been this sexually frustrated in his life. He’d had a semi all day, Rami only had to look at him and he wanted to bend him over the back of the couch. It was like his cock had now been given permission to  react to Rami. They’d spent all their spare time together the last few years, and he’d never had this problem. His cock was like a dog being finally let off a leash. 

Rami sat in his boxers and a t-shirt, Joe’s head in his lap as they watched a cooking show. Joe was snoring softly, his warm breath tickling Rami’s thighs. He ran his fingers through Joe’s soft hair, smiling at what today had brought.

Pulling out his phone he snapped a pic of his hand resting in Joe’s hair as he slept soundly on his lap. 

He sent it to Joe’s phone with the caption:

 “I’ve always loved you.” 

[sparkly-angell]

Stuckony Fic Rec because why not

*= series

ATTENTION! LOST ARM (If found please contact:) by Fakesheep-luna Teen, 8k Bucky doesn't understand why everyone is so worked up. He just went out for a few drinks, made some new friends and passed out in a dumpster. No big deal! "No big deal??" Steve squeaks, throwing his hands up in the air "You lost your arm! And you don't even remember how!" "Well, at least it wasn't the good one."

Guys!! This fic is comedy approved! its really good, made me laugh a lot, and the plot? amazing. Go read!

Break In by Tenspencerriedplease 7k Scott Lang, at least, understood why Tony hated this stupid job so damn much. He had a Masters degree in engineering but Tony was working on a PhD. Unfortunately for him even with his previous experience and schooling- good schooling- he was stuck working in a knockoff version of McDonald’s meets Subway. At least he works there until he meets Steve and Bucky.

askfjnsfdjsn aaaaaaaa I love gang AU and this one is Great. Highly recomend!

Brooklyn Boys - Bakey Au* by Quicksylver28 Teen/Mature 27k Tony is a bachelor college professor who walks into Steve and Bucky's Bakery/ Cafe. Awkward Flirting ensues.... and fluff, we wont forget the fluff.

ITS SO SWEET! Pun intended. Gosh, I wish I could eat all those baked goods. Sounds delicious. Anyways, the fic is sweet. Peter is a good friend.

Bruises and Drunken Heart Tattoos by Akira_of_the_twilight Teen, 6k An older man in his thirties was standing over Bucky with a bottle of aspirin in one hand, and the fingers of his other hand still gripping the rim of the cup he’d set down on the nightstand. Amber eyes blinked at Bucky in mild surprise. The man’s lips curved into a teasing smirk. “I hope I'm not interrupting anything."

I wanna hug Tony so hard over the course of this fic. It’s cute the way they fall in love. And it’s also funny. 

Canvas, Ink & Paint* by Ficlicious Teen, 11k Bucky's got one goal: to rescue a captured SHIELD agent and get out before the guards realize he's not one of them. Unfortunately, apparently he's also got soulmates, and when their messages and sketches start appearing on his skin, his mission becomes a complicated mess of trying not to get caught covered in their ink.

!!!!!! I love soulmate aus and this fic is one of my favorites!! Poor Bucky, tho, he was just trying to do his work. Go read!! 

Carrier by Just_another_tinker Explicit, 49k Steve and Bucky gift Tony with their jacket that survived from the 1940's. Turns out that wasn't the only thing that survived.

YALL. SO. MUCH. ANGST. and with a happy ending? someone said Pining? PERFECTION. I love the group dimensions in this fic. 

Comic Books and Kings by Ashes0909 Explicit, 10k Tony Stark read Captain America comics and everyone knew it, but it was only ever about Bucky Barnes.

Freacking great! Tony having a crush on Bucky before his crush on Steve? Godsent. 

Coffee Love* by Syriala Good, 8k Tony thought his best day was when Steve walked into the coffee shop he was working in. That was until Bucky came in a few days later.

The fluff!! The flirting!! Their kind of pining! *heart eyes*

Cried For Love (Can’t Stand It) by Potrix Explicit, 7k Bucky braces his hands on his hips, and tilts his head to the side, expression caught somewhere between anxious, confused, and nervous. “Well, shit.” “Yeah,” Steve agrees, worrying at his bottom lip, and rubbing at the back of his neck. “That can’t be good.”

Steve and Bucky become spirits and Tony blames himself (which he shouldn’t but thats Tony for you). I love this fic a loooot! (and i wanna hug tony a loooot too)

Difficult Conversations by Yumekiumono Mature, 34k HYDRA had brainwashed their Asset into silence, and then muzzled him to boot. It's not that surprising that Bucky no longer considers talking to be one of his strong suits. So why does he keep having to have difficult conversations? Or, the road to loving Tony Stark is never an easy one.

!!! Man! Tony/Bucky is strong in this fic, but also Steve is there and he is cute. Ive read some WinterIron fics with a similar plot, but the fact that this is Stuckony makes it 100% better. 

Don’t Say It by Bibliomaniac Teen, 35k Tony Stark is autistic and nonverbal. Which is fine, obviously, except for it means that Steve and Bucky don't have his words, and it only takes him a few minutes to decide they don't need to know he has theirs. That's also totally and definitely fine, until he goes and falls in love with them.

So. Fuckin. Good! Soulmate au. Its a must read fanfic. For real. The pining and the angst. Gosh, Tony is the best fuckin person. He doesn’t deserve all this pain.

Eagles by Spqr Teen, 6k Natasha presses her hand over her heart, and – Tony has heard rumors, that her skin is blank, or that she killed her other half, but he doesn’t believe them. “They deserve to know, don’t you think?” “They’ve been together for ninety years, Nat,” he says. “They’re practically married. There’s no room for me.”

Gosh!! Another soulmate au. Me addicted in them? yes. This one hurts more. I think i really cried while reading it. But has a happy ending so its worth it! 

From Winter’s Cold by 27dragons Explicit, 64 Thanks to one of Thor's crazy stalkers, Tony finds himself stranded in the past. If he significantly changes the course of history, he might never get home again. The choice, when it appears, turns out to be not nearly as difficult as he might have expected.

I simply love this fic. One of my personal favorites! Tony is taken back to 1945 and he finds no one other than.... Bucky. Go read! 

Liebestraum No.3 in A Flat by Daecyan_Shikoba Teen, 10k I humbly request to the pianist: Liebestraum No.3 in A flat

Im actually just doing this rec because of this fic. sfdjnsdkjfsn i love it SO much. Pianist Tony has a crush on his neighbours and has anonymous requests to play the piano. Its great. This fic is so relaxing to read.  

Long Distance by Notevenclosetostraight Explicit, 44k At the end of a bad day, Tony gets drunk and texts Rhodey all his woes. Except he typed the wrong number, and has been texting someone named Steve– who is blond, 28, teaches art and somehow charmed by Tonys drunk rambles.

Go read!!!!!!!! Its cute, full of sexy times and fluff. 

Hands by ezazahaz Teen, 1k He pushed harder, feeling the suit start to crack under his metal hand, the arc reactor giving way. Just a bit more force, and it might push through the grafted skin and false sternum that had replaced the device that had once been a part of the man. This time, instead of saving the man's heart, it would crush it, and he could never hurt Bucky again, never hurt Steve again. Bucky has a nightmare.

I know this one is smoll. But! it’s full of emotion and hurt/comfort. It’s cute. Mostly Bucky/Tony

Hollowness by amobisan Explicit, 63k It feels like a hollowness, when Tony first realizes. First sees. And the first thought, the first thought his useless, traitorous, genius brain can come up with was "At least this time when he leaves, it wasn't your fault."

So. Many. Feels. Tony is so selfless and sad it’s painful. But there’s also so much fluff!!! And a Lot of sexy times. 

How Good You’ve Got It by Orphan Account Mature, 2k Tony was only trying to work on deciphering Loki's power signature, which admittedly what Steve would call 'poking an angry brown bear with a pointy stick'. But if he could just- Shit. It wasn't supposed to do that.

Goddamn. One of my favorite fics!! I’ve already reread this like, three times. It’s small, I know, but the plot? Incredible.

Me through Him to You* by sahiya Teen/Explicit, 71k “You’re sick, you need someone to look after you. This mission could take a couple of days, and I want you in one piece when I get home.” Tony sighed. “Why do you care?” Steve’s mouth twisted unhappily. “I hope that’s the fever talking.” He stepped closer. “When I get home,” he said, so quietly that Tony didn’t think even the nosiest of their nosy friends could hear it, “we’re going to talk, all right? Until then, please let Bucky look after you. Consider it me looking after you, through him.”

First fic: sick fic, sick fic, sick fic!! Fluff!!! Love! Second fic: all. the. angst. you never knew you needed, with ahappy ending, tho. 

Not Like That At All by Catchclaw Explicit, 8k One last gig. That’s what Steve tells himself this'll be.

Hilarious! I s w e a r it’s so funny. I mean- theres a lot of smut that happens but the end? comical. And sweet. Go read!

One Date Wonder by Arukou Explicit, 20k Every week, the same guy comes into Steve and Bucky's diner and every week, he's got a new date on his arm. Guy just can't seem to catch a break, and after a particularly bad date, Steve and Bucky start taking matters into their own hands to help him out.

Sweet, cute, fluffy! Poor Tony I want to hug him :’( Amazing Diner!Au, a must read.

Pretend You Don’t Know Me!  by Aknightofagoodking Teen, 16k Peter forgets that his class is taking a field trip to Stark Tower. Tomorrow. ["So you want us to pretend we don't know you that well?" Mister Stark asks, looking somewhat unhappy. "Yes! Exactly! Pretend I'm actually just an intern. Can you do that for me, please?"]

Ok, so this focus more on Peter. But Stuckony as Peter’s dad? Isn’t that just the best thing in the world? 

Scientific Heresy by Antigrav_vector Mature, 34k In the process of running the particle accelerator in his basement and fixing the arc reactor, Tony finds himself flung into the past where he has to take on a fight not his own if he wants to get home to stop Vanko. At least he had a chance to replace the old rector that had been killing him with the new one before everything went sideways... But now he has no choice but to face off with family, friends, and old heroes, and none of that sounds remotely appealing. Well, okay, getting to meet them all during their glory days kinda does.

AAAA Ok, I love time travel stories, so i might be biased a little, but this is the best!! There’s a lot of action scenes which are great and engaging. It’s a must read. 

That Damn Flight Suit by Orphan Account Explicit, 2k James and Steve make a very interesting discovery about what really is under the Iron Man suit. Cue awkward boners, oblivious Tony, and slightly possessive super-soldiers who really don't want to share his...assets... with the world.

I mean- It’s smut. 

The Sex Shop Around the Corner by sadieb798 Mature, 16k Tony really hates his job. When he tries to figure out what he wants to do next, Tony decides that instead of making weapons for war, he should make things for pleasure. So he decides he's going to open his own sex shop.

cmon, tell me this isn’t the best au out there. skdjfsdkfsn but for real tho, the fic is full of fluff, some pining and kind of a mis communication? perfect. 

The Shirt by Sailorchibi Explicit, 3k How an impulsive decision that Tony made at sixteen and an equally impulsive decision that Tony made at forty-three combined to have the best outcome ever.

Smut. Again. But its damn good as well.

The Stories We Write by Notevenclosetostraight Mature, 33k A question at an interview leads to Steve and Bucky discovering fan fiction, and after piles of coffeeshop au's and fake dating tropes (and screaming over ABO fics) they find an author that writes some of the best fics they've ever read-- reader inserts starring a dark haired, dark eyed male reader as their shared love interest.

This fic is so freacking amazing!! Steve and Bucky are such nerds. Tony is mostly unaware until--

Thats it!!! Hope you enjoy reading them all :) If you want more, you know where to find me ;)

[bdamanlover4ever]

Heya:P I was wondering about a MitsuBoru fic revolving around the two just chillin after the whole “Mitsuki betrayal ark”and then Mitsuki starts talking about his love of (what ever, hobby, animal, person, toy, picture etc.) and Boruto is McFuckin Floored, Not Ok, bc watching Mitsuki babble on and sparkle with what he loves Boruto realises “sHIT IM IN LOVE” the more fluff the better :D -Boruto Gen = Gay Minefield

Word count: 1,244

‘Maybe there was something in the way Mitsuki talked. No, No, not the way…how? No, not how. Prehaps it’s when.’ Boruto nodded to himself, satisfied with this conclusion.  His brain configuring, ‘There is something special when Mitsuki talks.’

The wind seemed to change, the air felt more thicker, and it could be freezing outside, but Boruto would still sweat. A sensation of endearment would flood his senses, and he’d stay locked in yellow orbs. Ears tuning in to hear the soft sound of Mitsuki’s voice.

“I thought about it.” Mitsuki explained, “I really did take a bunch of things into cons-”

“During your journey of self awareness?” Boruto cut him off, a dopey smile resting on his face. His pretty blonde locks covered up his cheeky sky blue eyes, as they twinkled in admiration.

The blue haired boy closed his eyes as if recalling the memories implanted in his mind. He swayed a bit, listening to the trees rustling, birds chirping, and other pleasant sounds of Leaf Village.

Boruto tucked his head down in his jacket. He was slightly embarrassed for interrupting his friend like that. It was an accident, he’d get so excited and impulsively blurt something out. Shyly, he fumbled his thumbs. “What did you miss most about this place?” He asked lowly.

Mitsuki blinked his eyes open, just in time to see the sun catching through blond locks. Boruto was steadily messing with his hands and blush claimed his face, but his blue eyes kept right on staring into Mitsuki’s.

There was something dazzling when their eyes fell into each other. Simple gestures, and emotions could be felt just by a single gaze.

Mitsuki raised his eyebrows to a serene position, lips quivering as the sun slowly sank into the horizon. It made him inch forward, just until his nose touched up against Boruto’s. “You.” His voice was less confident than before, when he was rambling. Instead it had switched out to be more delicate and peaceful.

Boruto scoffed, trying to disregard the answer. “That’s not true!” He fired out, yanking his head back away from Mitsuki. He ended up slamming his whole back against the wall, which made him wince. “Oops, dang it! I didn’t mean to bump…” He turned back to sputtered, “Hold on, it’s a wall…What are you do-” His face turned an even brighter shade of red, he was ready to smack himself on the head. “Why am I talking to a wall?!”

Snake like hands grabbed his wrist, and pulled him close. “Boruto, walls can’t talk.” Instead of allowing Boruto to smack himself for his own stupidity, Mitsuki gentle patted him on the head. He ran his fingers through soft blonde locks and combed them back.

At the sensation, Boruto shuttered. He felt like he might boil over, with Mitsuki’s smooth touch messaging his scalp. Closing his eyes, he broke their trance. “I know.” He mumbled. In comparison to Mitsuki’s voice, his sounded distant, gruff, and slothful. It much much more interesting to have Mitsuki ramble on, then to hear his own.

Yet Mitsuki grew silent again, and withdrew his hands from Boruto’s hair. Soon as the delicate touch left him, Boruto whimpered like a homeless puppy.

“What’s wrong?” Mitsuki grew concerned for his friend once more. There was confusion and heartbreak written all over his face. It was times like these, he wished Boruto would be more clear about stuff.

Boruto popped open his eyes, to watch the sunset in the distance. “Everything and nothing at all.” His eyebrows melted together, as he finally stopped fumbling with his thumbs.

“How so?”

“I overreact is all.”

“To?”

Boruto turned to face Mitsuki. He pierced his lips together, carefully observing the other boy. He scanned his face for any hidden signs of loneliness, or if he was annoyed with him yet. There was never any signs of that on Mitsuki’s face. It was just paranoia that always made him have to check.

Mitsuki shrugged his shoulders, “I overreact too. Mostly, when I see my friends get hurt.” A mischievous gleam came in his eye, “Especially when I see you get hurt.” It seemed to read but the words were never actually verbalized aloud.

That was the thing. Words just didn’t get said between them. Actions spoke louder. The strings tugging in their hearts, silently pleaded things best left unsaid.

Boruto agreed with Mitsuki. “Same!” He nodded feverishly, “I overreact all the time, even on accident.” This was his way of saying, “Right now, I’m overreacting. Your touch, makes my heart flip out. Haha.. get it overreacting?”

Mitsuki’s drive to keep on rambling wavered. He uttered a simple, “Okay.” A one word response, which meant that he was ending wherever this was going.

A sigh of relief escaped from Boruto, one that he didn’t even know he was holding in. In times like these, the more he took into consideration feelings and emotions, it would make him get more discombobulated.

He had to keep his head up, eyes locked on, ears focused. Boruto couldn’t afford to miss a single word that past through Mitsuki’s mouth. From now on he was going to take all his friend had to say straight to the heart.

“So you say you missed me the most, well now you probably think I spent my time talking to walls while you were gone.”

“I don’t think that. You came looking for me, so that’s something.”

“Something?” Boruto retorted, as if there sound have been more substance to that word. He motioned to the wall behind them, “That is something.” He switched up and pointed at Mitsuki, “Me going after you was….” All at once his mouth went dry, words fled from his tongue before he could properly explain.

Mitsuki tilted his head, curiously awaiting an answer. Then, he read the perplexed awestruck look on Boruto’s face. The blonde fumbling around with vowels and consonants that didn’t make any sense, as he attempted to string together a valuable sentence. A little sly smile came on Mitsuki’s face. “I don’t need to know what it was, your eyes and expression say it all.”

For a long time, neither one of them spoke. They just took in the view of the sky and watched the sunset together.

The whole time Boruto was struggling to find a way to explain himself. Yet, how could he explain the inexpiable? Mitsuki said he didn’t need to know, but Boruto wanted him to know. He wanted the other boy to hear him say it.

“Dang it!” Boruto complained hunching over, he folded his arms bitterly. “Out of the times to overreact.” He muttered under his breath, eyes flicking to catch a glimpse of Mitsuki smiling at him lightly with his face in the palm of his hand.

“Hmm?”

“Why are you looking at me? The sun is setting over there.”

Mitsuki kept on watching Boruto’s adorable reactions. “Well, I’m watching my sun set.” He got a vibrant excited ring in his tone, “Ya know, the sun doesn’t set the same, when you don’t see it in person.” Yellow eyes flickered, as cherishing words fell from lips. “I missed seeing it in person.”

Boruto felt his heart flutter, at the declaration. His blue eyes falling into yellow, desperate to convey words that he knew might never be verbalized. But even if he never said it aloud, the fuzzy sensation in his chest could no longer be denied.

[emikvs]

﹤𝙽𝙰𝙽𝙰 𝙺𝙾𝙼𝙰𝚃𝚂𝚄, 𝚂𝙷𝙴 / 𝙷𝙴𝚁, 𝙲𝙸𝚂 𝙵𝙴𝙼𝙰𝙻𝙴﹥; * - hello EMIKO " EMI " SATO. long time no see. i know a lot about you. like how you're TWENTY ONE, how you're a CLASSICS major,  and in fact.. how you LIE AND TELL EVERYONE YOU STUDIED ABROAD FOR A YEAR WHEN YOU WERE ACTUALLY IN REHAB. would be a shame if it got out, wouldn't it ? so let's play a game. 𝚃𝚁𝚄𝚃𝙷 𝙾𝚁 𝙳𝙰𝚁𝙴 ?

*itzy vc* hey hey hey ! SDBJWBDJW what’s up......its xan aha ... this is gonna be the biggest mess ever ...just winging it as i go. and u know what ? thats on on brand babey ! lets get it ...TW: drug use/mention, accidents/hospitalization ( just in case)

backstory

virginia born and raised babey ! she’s the youngest of five siblings and ...it shows. SJDBJWBDJW growing up would have been pretty chaotic had it not been for the fact that her dad was a pretty well-respected police officer in their town ! him & her mom were high school sweethearts which made no damn sense to emiko considering they’re still happily married...the concept just seems fake to her </3

while her parents had a lot of  mushy love for each other, when it came to their kids they opted to take a more emotionally distanced kind of parenting style bc they didnt wanna like spoil their kids or anything but.....it wasnt exactly the best plan ! emi and all her siblings just learned to be very good liars JDSBWBDJW as kids with strict parents do

being the youngest emi took a while to get into her rebellious phase. for a while she’d just watch her older siblings sneak out and party and do walks of shame and all that jazz...and while she was always down to help them get out of trouble none of them ever really trusted her ? since she was the baby they figured she’d be the most likely to snitch which just made her really ///: bc she wanted to be included so bad

flash forward to senior year of high school and finally emi’s like . okay fuck this it’s MY turn ! her dad had recently decided to get into politics with some encouragement from the police chief so he was busy with his career and her mom was busy helping him. it was the perfect time to do what she wanted since it was less likely she’d get caught

so she goes to this graduation party.....and it’s BAD like she gets fucked up & carried away so she calls her oldest sister ( who had come back into town for emi’s graduation ) to come pick her up & on the way to get emi from this house party, her sister ends up getting into an accident 

she didn’t die though JSBJDSBBWJDBWJDBJWDW just broke some stuff and ended up needing surgery ): and emi obviously got busted that night by her parents which ... wasnt pretty at all especially bc they low key blamed her for her sister’s accident which just made emi feel like pure shit babey ! 

visiting her sister in the hospital is what kinda sparked her fear of hospitals ! bc emi was like super guilty and paranoid that maybe her sister was gonna die or her surgery would go wrong and she’d essentially be at fault...it was just a lot of anxiety that turned into a genuine phobia of hospitals after that

but her sister made it she was okay and her dad used all the buzz and tragedy around his family to kinda boost his political career....which was ugly. her sister had been prescribed some pretty heavy pain killers for the pain & thats where things got.....messy

emi isnt sure when exactly it started but between the guilt she was harboring over her sister’s accident, the stress from her parents as her dad got further and further into virginia politics as well as college anxiety since she was about to start at the universoty of virginia.....she stole some oxy and thats what started what would be a very messy and tumultuous addiction  

as soon as she started college, emi felt as if some of the weight had been lifted. she was living away from her family for the first time and dorming so she promised herself she’d take these four years to grow and figure out who she is......except that didnt exactly happen. instead of exploring herself in a healthy way, emi was using drugs as a sort of escapism from her “old” self. she’s extremely smart and she loves her major, but her professors would often comment her papers had the energy of a “rambling and troubled mind”. by the time she was about to finish her sophomore year she was getting so high people would find her literally passed out in the dining hall. but no one was that worried bc for a good two years, she was a pretty high functioning addict. 

cue the summer after sophomore year when emi overdoses at a party. she woke up in a private hospital room with only her father sitting on the couch, the look on his face something she’ll never forget. while him and her mother knew exactly what happened to emi, they hadn’t told any of her siblings. or anyone at all, for that matter. instead her dad had informed the university emi would be taking a year off to privately study abroad and told emi that’s what she was going to tell people bc he’d just decided to run for mayor ! he essentially guilt-tripped her into thinking telling people the truth would be a selfish act, and one that would basically ruin the family reputation and make everyone really miserable JSDWDBWBDJW he also tells her she’s gonna be shipped off to rehab ! 

so she goes to rehab for a good seven months. everyone at school thinks she’s studying abroad in italy, and emi is literally just counting the days til she can go back home to her dorm bc she’s lonely !!! in rehab !!! and she gets that she should take it seriously but shes just so mad at her dad and herself and the world too ig ... just some good old fashioned angst ! but she finishes rehab and her dad got elected as mayor of her hometown in virginia and shes like good for u can i go back to school please JSBDWJDBJW and he says yes

so she’s back ! ready for the universe to give her a break.....ahaha.....

personality + tidbits

so emi......my baby......she’s a strange one. she’s that bitch that’s super nerdy but in the weirdest way like the stuff she’s into is so specific and just....generally stuff literally no one else would care about but to emi it’s like holy shit this is the coolest thing in the world JSBDJWBDJWBJD she knows a little about a lot so she has the tendency to come across as pretentious if you don’t know her outside of class when in reality she’s just read one too many random facts. also weird in the sense that she’s a STRONG believer in the paranormal and in aliens and in witchcraft and stuff like that as well as believing in things that seem “logical”. it can be confusing to people who view that stuff as silly that someone so smart would be into it. 

speaking of smart.....she’s a polygot which basically means she can speak a bunch of languages ! she’s self-taught, and since she’s a classics major some of her favorites to study include greek and latin ( dead language who ? ). she’s pretty chill about it though and if you wanted to learn she’d be the type that’s 100% down to teach you. she always learns the curse words first just you know....for the fun of it ! she probably has very specific “pet names” for everyone in the friend group in random languages 

anyway she’s also stupid. ASDJWBDWBJDBWJDWJD i mean like in the way that she makes the most .... impulsive decisions that usually have negative consequences. she’s the type to convince herself she knows exactly what she’s then come up with the worst plan you have ever heard in your life. an example of a dumb decision emi has made ? your girl ate a pot brownie the day after she got back in her dorm after rehab bc she convinced herself it was a good way to de-stress. some other dumb decisions include various drunk tattoos ( which thankfully haven’t been too bad save for the words eat me tattooed in small font on her ass ). also owns a stick & poke gun so she’s for sure tried to tattoo friends while intoxicated despite.....not being a tattoo artist ... she’s not even an art student .... SJBDJWBDJW....but she’s very very good at convincing people to join in on her dumb antics so be weary

big on photography !!! she loves taking pictures. always that one friend who reminds you to document the moment and you get annoyed but then when you want to post a picture on insta you’re thankful she was there <3 she has the energy of like .... the dad friend when you need support JSDBWBDJWBDJW she tries to be caring but it just turns into like ... emi high off her ass putting her hand on your shoulder and being like “you know fuck it man you’re amazing” not that good at the emotional stuff like she really wants to be but she legit doesn’t know how.......kinda accidentally turned into an emo kid bc she channels her feelings though some kick ass playlists and the notes app in her iphone instead of talking to people JSBDJWBJDBWJDBJ 

she’s high key struggling but she’s the type to be like no its fine this is fine life is a ride babey better hold on ! tries to keep things flirty and fresh 99% of the time but then you’ll witness the rare emi breakdown which.....involves a whole lot of tweets that will all be deleted within 24 hours and emi will in fact deny they ever existed

really a laid-back girl but the chaotic energy is there folks......she can also very easily get into her youngest child complex if she’s upset which just involves emi being a pain in the ass and everyone having to deal with it JSBDWBDJWBDJWBDJW  she likes to make it hard to say no to her.....not exactly manipulative but sometimes she can get close /: not listed in her fears but she is in fact scared of genuine love and affection ! it’s like she craves it so much she’s terrified abt what will happen if she ever gets it.......so she makes sure she’s never in danger of that by never getting into anything serious.....but then at night shes like damn . kinda want a freak to hold my hand rn and tell me they love me ... JSDBWBDJWBDJWBJDWJDW it’s all fun and games.............

ok thats it im done rambling.................this is so long..............and for what !!!!! i made her more of a clown than i intended but thats okay (: JSDBJWBDWJDBWJ emi might hate clowns but im embracing them ! 

[softstraykidsimagines]

Boyfriend!I.N (Jeongin) 

MASTERLIST 

WOOT WOOT

Little Jeongin!

This is gonna be so damn fluffy watch out 

Here we go!!!

Ok so Jeongin is shy at the best of times

So God help this poor child while he has a crush on you

He won’t even be able to talk to you properly

Most likely runs away whenever he gets embarrassed

Which is very often

Just

Can’t function

If one of the members even try the subject of his crush on you when you’re in the room

He lets instinct take over

And he dolphin screams to distract everyone

As people look in his direction

Because he is hella loud

He’ll scream again and die on the inside

Why can’t I think straight with y/nnnnn

He’d be so frustrated with himself

He’ll probably mentally slap himself every other second when he talks to you

Why did you say that? What is y/n gonna think of you?! IDIOT

I highly doubt he’d confess to you himself

At least in person

One of the members probably told you

So you went to see him

And scared the bejesus out of him when you asked if it was true

But he eventually nodded and confessed and VERY quietly asked you out this baby my God save him

To which you OBVIOUSLY said yes

And he probably jumped around happily to your response

Tried to stay cool, because he is Mature™

But as soon as you were not around he’d scream with happiness and run around because he is a ball of energy and he’s gonna explode

He’s whipped, your grace

Dates with Jeongin

Is it really such a mystery?

So so SO soft

His first date with you was going to a carnival

Because he made it his new goal in life to win you a stuffed toy

And win your heart forever

Little did he know that had already happened

Got really grouchy when he didn’t win anything

But immediately felt better when you both had something to eat who doesn’t feel better with food?

Forgot how to human when the date came to an end

And you kissed him on the cheek

Half as a joke, he collapsed onto the ground in a heap of giggles not really a joke it was genuine

He was, at that moment, the happiest boy to walk the planet

You can probably guess that this kid is too shy for PDA

But he’s all for hand holding wherever you two go

He really loves to swing your arms back and forth like children cause that’s what you are

Sometimes will peck your cheek if he’s feeling bold

If you initiate skinship out and about, he’s gonna turn a dark shade of red

But will hold in his squeal thank goodness

If the members tease him for being shy

Because where’s the lie

He’ll greet you and become insanely clingy

If you ask him why he won’t tell you

“I just really really really wanted to hug you”

“Jeongin you’ve been clinging onto me for 10 minutes, are you okay? And what if the boys tease you”

“They won’t I’m proving a point”

“Say what?!”

First kiss.

You’d think it’d be you who would have to make the first move right?

Wrong.

So freaking wrong

Because realise: once he makes his mind up about something, Jeongin carries his decision through to the end

And he decided to make a certain evening walk in the park very special

You were walking around, and it had gotten dark, only a few street lamps lit your way

You were both talking about absolute nonsense, laughing at each others jokes etc

And then he suddenly became very serious

“Can I ask you a favour? It’s really important to me…”

You got kinda nervous, because when was the last time Jeongin managed to keep a strait face like that?

From his pocket he pulled out a chain bracelet, with a pretty but subtle pattern on it. “Can you wear this? For me? And whenever you’re sad, or scared, look at it and think of me, and I can protect you”.

You were absolutely dumbstruck, so you just quietly let him out the bracelet on

You were about to cry as well

He showed you a second one which he had on his own wrist. “I want this to be something special between us”

And then he siezes the moment

And connects his lips with yours

Very gently

He kisses you so delicately, like you’re made of ice, about to break

When you part, he smiles softly

And starts walking again, calmly

Making you stand there confused af

Like where tf is shy Jeongin? Who is this?

Spoiler alert, it’s I.N, not soft Jeongin

Oh lord prepare yourself before meeting the rest of SKZ

Physically and mentally

Knowing them they’ll probably try to lift you up and get you to crowd surf

While still teasing the Maknae

They’ll be so protective of you, just like with Jeongin

You have become family, don’t doubt that for half a second

You are also now in charge of being the mood lifter for Jeongin

And his reassurance

Especially if he’s sick

Because he gets really tired whenever he so much as catches a cold, because he refuses to stop working and rest common sense who?

And when he’s tired, he thinks way more negatively

You were once alone with him in the practice room, and he was trying to improve a few moves to a really difficult choreography

For a while he kept smiling like the child he is, staying positive

But after trying over and over, having to catch his breath from fatigue, having trouble breathing from a blocked nose, he still couldn’t get the moves right

And out of pure exhaustion and frustration, he burst into tears no judging I’ve had this it’s painful

You immediately went over and hugged him tightly, reassuring him and calming him down

You both sat together on the floor, until he wasn’t upset anymore, but you still refused to let him practice after that

You took him home and looked after him until he passed out that night

The members were confused af as well 

“What’s wrong with Jeongin?”, asked Chan, being his usual protective-leader self

You replied simply because you didn’t want to upset the other boys. “He got frustrated at the dance he’s learning, and was exhausting himself, so I dragged him home to sleep...”

They were all really grateful the you were looking after Jeongin so well, and their love for you with the Maknae you only grew

Now this boy is not at all afraid of speaking his mind

So you two basically leave everything out in the open

No secrets

If one of you is pissed at the other, you will freaking say that you’re pissed at them

You don’t hold back

So then you can both talk rather freely about why you might be pissed

Basically what I’m saying is that fights are super rare

Because they don’t even get a chance to start when you two are so open with each other

So at most you bicker over food

But there are times

Like I said, insanely rarely 

Jeongin doesn’t tell you how much he’s struggling

He doesn’t want to seem like he’s complaining too much so he stays quiet about his worries about being an idol

It’s a bit like his situation during The 9th: he doesn’t want to burden anyone about feeling down, so he keeps a bright smile on his face

You kinda sense that there’s something up, but he convinces you for a long time that he is totally fine 

But when it becomes too much 

Being tired, frustrated, stressed and worked to the bone, and he still hasn’t said anything to anyone

He’ll break and yell at you over something not even worth yelling about

It’ll shock you so much that you’ll flinch away from him

He won’t just yell at you 

He’ll yell about how tired he is, about how unfair he thinks it is that he can’t learn a dance as quickly as anyone else

He’ll yell about everything and nothing

You understand quickly that he’s letting of steam, getting it all off his chest 

So once he’s quiet again, breathing heavily, crying silently

You’ll hug him gently, and reassure him that you’re there no matter what and that he can ramble and complain all he wants with you

NO MORE ANGST IM OUTTA HERE

He tries to force you to watch Mukbang, until you threaten him that you’ll secretly feed him black beans

You both love blasting Bruno Mars in the dorms, driving SKZ up the wall as you sing at the top of your lungs

He’ll try to teach to sing trot like him

But you both know that you’ll never be as good at singing it as him

He loves texting you whenever he has a spare half-second

He always gets in trouble with the other members because as soon they stop what they're doing, he's off to get his phone

“Where did Jeongin go”, asked Woojin. “He was here a second ago...” 

Chan sighed. “I can take a guess. JEONGIN PUT THAT DAMN PHONE DOWN!” 

He uses his Maknae Influence™ to get our of trouble lol

You both like to try and cook together

Doesn't really work

You usually end up making a mess

Or if you’re baking something

Like cookies

You'll end up eating all the batter before it even reaches the oven

Stray Kids will be deprived of cookies RIP 

When you suggest him meeting your family

He gets super nervous

But refuses to show it

You'll kind of pick up on his attitude

The way he answers questions on the matter so directly and seriously

But you're too kind and high-key impressed to point it out 

But when he does meet your fam he's super smiley and actually seems genuinely comfortable 

You on the other hand

Get hella stressed when you're supposed to meet his parents 

Will they approve? 

Will his brothers like you? 

As soon as you voice your concerns to Jeongin

He hugs you, reassuring you that they'll all adore you

He couldn't have been more right

His parents are so so sweet and love you from the word go 

Both his brothers love you just as much

Especially his younger brother, who just idolises you 

It’s so cute

You immediately exchange contacts and stay in touch

Jeongin ended up making a group chat with you and his bros because he was so excited that you got on so well

His favourite thing to do in the evening with you is just watch a random show

From a K-Drama to a weird comedy neither of had ever seen

He just likes relaxing with you, usually with your legs draped over his lap 

Probably screamed the first time you walked over wearing one of his jumpers

“ISN'T THAT MINE?”

“Oh, sorry I'll go put it back...” 

“DON'T YOU EVEN DARE I LOVE IT” 

Low-key snuck his hoodies into your closet just so he could see you wear them

But as soon as you brought it up

He'd refuse to give any answer on the matter

“What are you talking about? You must have stolen them yourself, thief”.

“Alright, I'll give them back, then”.

“No no, you stole them, so you must keep them”

“... Right” 

The first time he said 'I love you’ resembled your first kiss 

He had thought about it and planned it out 

The plan didn't really work

He'd meant to cook something for you

And watch your favourite movie 

And surprise you by just saying ‘I love you’ casually

But he messed up dinner

Accidentally spilled too much salt into the dish

So instead ordered takeout from your favourite place

Then 

Just because the universe was against him, for some unknown reason, the movie wouldn't work

So you ended up watching something else

And he was about to give up and plan for another day

But it just kinda slipped out?

“I'm sorry I couldn't make this a perfect night”, he said, dejected. “I wish I could just... easily show you how much I love you...” 

Sort of panicked after he said it

He started stuttering while trying to explain himself

Until you kissed him to shut him up

Telling him that you loved him too

And that's how he had a happiness heart attack

This bean will go public after a couple of years

He posted a photo of you smiling brightly in a cafe

With a simple caption: 'Love you so much’ 

Now naturally the internet is gonna die because hello?

Little baby Jeongin is dating?! 

But after a few hours of commotion there's gonna be something unexpected

People will recognise you 

From clips in SK TALKER

They'd seen the two of you

Just barely within the view of the camera 

Messing around and playing a bunch of games to pass the time

Some had naturally insisted that you two were dating

But you were mostly just written off as Jeongin’s best friend who had come to see him a few times backstage

But now that he had officially announced your relationship

There were A LOT of people saying 'I told you so’ on the internet

Whoops

Low-key, kpop fandoms area group of mini Sherlock Holmes’

He becomes so happy at the very mention of your name

Low-key hopes in every convo that someone will bring you up

Just so that he can talk about you nonstop

He talks a lot about you

SKZ always get a real earful

Especially when they’re away

He'll never stop talking about you which pisses pretty much everyone off

His coping mechanism for being away from you is just to recap a bunch of his favourite moments with you

So naturally anyone within earshot of him will hear a bunch of cute stories about you two

Right up until the moment he sees you again

Thank heavens the rest of SKZ will say as they watch the Maknae crush you in a hug, giggling excitedly

All in all, you two have a soft af relationship

With lots of giggles, cuddles surprisingly, and a lot of love

Can I please just get a Jeongin?? 

There we go! That concludes my soft-ass day! 

Now, I’m going away on holiday (sooner than I thought I would), but that’s not gonna stop me from writing! There’ll just be a few posts that won’t be on the Masterlist for a while. But as soon as I get access to any computer, I’ll update the Masterlist :) 

[chanyueda]

my dumbass previously posted this on my sideblog lmao but its ok i posted it privately and now i have to suffer the consequences of copy pasting it manually on this phone because apparently i cant copy paste the whole thing

Dearest pen pal,

You did not write back again. I’m starting to feel like I really annoyed you with everything that’s happening to me. Tell me, should I even continue? I’m sorry, Steven. I really am.

Can’t you at least write back, just one? I’m not really telling you to actually do it but I haven’t heard from you! Are you okay? Do you need help? I’m worried! You don’t know how you make me feel so distracted with everything that I have to do. I’m on my final year at college, it’s stressing, yes, but what stresses me more is the fact that you’re not writing back to me.

Please be okay, for my sake? That’s all I ask of you now. Forget about writing back. Just...be okay.

Your pen pal,

Andrew

Something nagged at the back of his mind. Why did he decide to not write back anyway? His conscience slowly swallowed him. This...Andrew, kept hoping he’d write back one day, but he never did.

Steven unknowingly crumpled the letter. He felt a wave of anguish that boiled inside of him. He was confused; why was he feeling this way? It’s only the second letter, but the emotions were already too much for him to bear. He could only crumple the paper more for he can’t translate his feelings into words.

Steven wanted to write back immediately after crumpling the paper. He was already on the move to get a pen and paper, but he realized he didn’t know the address of this person. Usually, the letters are put in an envelope with the name and address of the sender, but looking inside the chest, no envelope was found. It only contained Andrew’s letters, which baffled him more.

It’s not like him to leave letters like this. When he received one, whether it’s from a carrier company or some random one, he’d keep the envelope. He thought, maybe if he kept it, if ever he wanted to send a letter, he’d have a clue of the address. So why, in this case, the letters were not placed on their envelopes?

“Why are you being weird, standing in the middle of your room like that?” Star, his roommate, stood in the doorway again, doing a facepalm.

“I’m not...?” Steven glanced around, yeah, he was definitely standing up.

“What’s gotten into you?” Star asked, already concerned. He approached Steven cautiously.

“The letters.” He replied with no hesitation. “They’re weird. Not me.”

“Care to share?”

They sat down on the bed and Steven got hold of the two letters he just read minutes ago. He fumbled with his fingers in nervousness, and straightened the second crumpled letter. Star could not help but laugh, which earned a look from Steven.

“I’m sorry, it’s just that...you crumpled it. And you’re just on the second one! There’s hundreds of them for you to crumple.”

“Stop...” he groaned. “Look, I’m not good at this but, this person...Andrew, keeps on writing to me.”

“Yeah, you got that much from reading 2 letters.” Star shrugged. “What I mean is, you’re assuming shit.”

“No!” Steven unknowingly shouted. “I...I’m sorry I shouldn’t have...”

But Star didn’t get offended or anything, instead, he laughed it off, saying, “You’re just confused okay? Naturally, everything about you will affect everything else, including your feelings and emotions. Anyway, continue on! I want to hear more.”

Steven sighed before continuing, “He’s been writing...no, telling me that I’m not writing back to him anymore. Like, he’s insinuating that we were communicating before but I just...stopped?” He let out an exasperated sigh. “I don’t know!”

“Let me see that!” Star forcefully grabbed the letters from Steven’s hands and read them on his own. His facial expressions varied from time to time; he was shocked at first but soon after, he found himself close to tears.

“You’re overreacting.” Steven commented while watching him.

“Wow, the audacity! You’re the one who’s overreacting! I’m mainly conveying normal emotions while reading shit. Besides...he really made it sound like you were exchanging letters before. Why would he even bother to write pen pal if you two weren’t doing this?”

Steven remained quiet.

“Plus the second letter—“

“What’s wrong with it?!” He said suddenly, which sent Star into a fit of shock. “Sorry.”

“Who’s overreacting now bitch?” Star rolled his eyes. “Anyway...Andrew didn’t write your name at the first part. The...salutations shit. I don’t know, I don’t write letters.”

“Wait, what?” Steven stole the crumpled paper and reread it again. “Y-You’re right! I...I’m confused. Maybe he just forgot it? Or...maybe he purposely left it out?!” He rambled, which earned a look from his roommate.

“Why...do you seem angry?” Star shook his head. “No, why are you angry? What’s it to you, anyway?”

Steven couldn’t make out a reply to that.

“You’re affected!” Star laughed once more. “Minutes ago, you were ready to fight whoever this Andrew is and now…”

“I’m still ready to fight him! For a different reason, that is…”

The question still stands, what’s it to him anyway? Andrew just didn’t write his name and now, he’s mad about that? Something tugged at the back of his mind, but he paid no attention to it.

“Yeah whatever, you gotta get ready. We’re leaving in 5.” Star stood up from the bed and went out the door. “Take the letters with you, if you want.”

Steven stared at the unread letters. It was too early to form conclusions, and he knew that, but he can’t help it. He just wants this whole letter thing to be over. But he knew it wasn’t going to be that easy. These letters might, and still contain the answers to the questions he’s had on his head. These letters might give an insight as to what happened between him and his mysterious pen pal.

What even happened between the two of them?

i fucked up the middle part HAHA im too lazy to edit more ☹️ anyway i really love editing your parts @avantbergara bc im really trying to align it to your personality but i think im doing worse? lmao idk whatever

[professor-hiddles]

One and Only pt.2

pairing: peter parker x reader

word count: 3.9k

warnings: super minor mentions of death, post-breakup brooding & again, cute lil peter

pt.1

Your hospital visit was nothing out of the ordinary, the E.R. staff knew you by name at this point. After playing sports your whole life, breaking bones here and there, you’re bound to end up in a hospital at one point or another. The last time you were there, it was a fractured wrist from falling during soccer practice. Your doctor told you to take it easy, but ‘easy’ wasn’t in your vocabulary.

Your doctor, Dr. Collins, decided it would be best if you stayed overnight, just so they could watch for any potential internal bleeding or other complications. This sounded absolutely ridiculous to you, but understandable to your father.

“Honey, its only one night. I’m sure you’ll survive. Anyway, I gotta go, I have to pick up your brother before work. I’m working the night shift today, but call if you need anything, I love you,” your dad said, kissing you on the forehead and walking out. Now, it was just you and your thoughts left in the room.

[P.P.] Hey, Y/N, how’s the hospital?

You smiled at the text, happy that someone actually cared enough to text you.

[Y/N] eh, could have been worse, but nothing I haven’t seen before lol the food still sucks, and my dad left so i’m a little lonely at the moment

[P.P.] What if I told u I was on my way there? I might bring food too if ur nice lol

[Y/N] PLEASE DO I’LL LOVE U FOREVER PETER

Just as you put your phone down, there was a soft knock on your door. Your head snapped up, to find Peter standing there, pizza box and teddy bear in hand. A wide smile formed on your face, and you beckoned for him to come in.

“Peter! You brought food!” You threw an arm around him, careful not to further agitate your already hurting ribcage.

He chuckled, opening the box and handing you a slice. “Thought you might want some company. I was actually on my way up when I texted you, and then I saw the gift shop, and this little guy was just calling my name,” he said, handing you the bear.

“Now I wont be lonely! Also, I don’t think this counts as our date, so I’d be more than willing to go out with you as soon as I’m out of here,” you said, smile still planted on your face.

He smiled, knowing that the both of you subconsciously counted this as a date, but neither cared to admit it. He grabbed your hand, squeezing it a bit.

“That would be awesome, Y/N. So maybe we should start brainstorming? Like ideas for the date, you know?” He almost looked nervous, though you doubted that this was his first actual date. You nodded your head, pulling a piece of paper from your backpack that your dad left. ‘Do some homework, Y/N. Keep your mind on track.’

Even in the hospital you couldn’t catch a break.

“Alright, so, what do you want to do? Movies, dinner, hang out; what style of date do you fancy, Mr. Parker?” You joked, smiling. The gears were turning in his head, trying to think of places he liked.

“Okay, well there is this one spot, right in the middle of Central Park, there’s a huge-ass rock that I like to lay on and look at the stars, but I get it if its too far for you. I know you  sometimes have to watch your brother, so if you want to stay closer to home, I’m sure I could think of somewh—“ You put a hand over his mouth to stop his rambling.

“Peter, that sounds perfect. It really doesn’t matter if its a kind of far, I can always get my neighbor to watch my brother. If it’s somewhere you recommend, I’m sure I’ll love it. Now, when do you want to go?” You chewed on the end of the pen, heart fluttering at the thought of actually going on a date with him.

“How’s Friday? I could swing by around 7? You know, if you feel good enough, with your cracked rib and all.” He chuckled a little under his breath, at the small spider-man pun he made. You didn’t seem to catch it, which was a small relief for him. 

You nodded, setting the date in your calendar. “You’ve got yourself a date, now hopefully I can convince my dad to let me go. He’s too protective sometimes, you know?” Peter laughed, thinking of his Aunt May, and how protective she was. His phone then buzzed with an important message from Tony Stark, signaling it was time for him to leave.

“Yeah, I completely understand. Speaking of protective family, I gotta get going. My Aunt May would kill me if she knew I wasn’t at decathlon practice right now,” he said, watching for your reaction. Your face did fall a bit, but you understood why he had to go.

“Don’t miss me too much, Parker. Text me when you get home though, so I know you’re safe, ok?” He nodded his head, giving you a quick hug and a kiss on the head before making his way out.

Once you were alone, you looked at the small bear that he bought for you. You noticed it was dressed like Spider-man, which made you laugh a bit.

“Guess its just me and you now, Spidey. Hope you like ‘How I met Your Mother,’ ‘cause thats what I’m putting on.” Your hand reached for the remote, and you settled into the hospital bed, with a slice of pizza and the bear.

The next morning, you were woken up to doctors and nurses clamoring around your room. You rubbed your eyes, confused as to what was going on. Your father was there, arguing with the doctor, who apparently wanted to keep you there for another night.

“Oh, good, you’re awake. How do you feel? Any pain? Nausea? Vomiting?” The doctor was moving you around, getting your heartbeat, checking the wounded area, looking very frazzled.

“No, I feel absolutely fine. Great, in fact. Why is everyone so antsy? Did something happen while I was sleeping?” You were incredibly confused, no one wanted to tell you anything.

“Sweetpea, this might sound strange, but the doctors told me that somehow, your rib healed itself while you were sleeping. Something that should have taken at least a few weeks to heal, miraculously happened overnight. They want to keep you for further observation, but I don’t want you to be an experiment,” your father had a comforting hand on your shoulder, but your mind was struggling to grasp what had just been told to you.

Your first instinct was to poke the rib, for whatever reason. No pain. Your eyebrows furrowed, more puzzled than ever. How is this possible?

“Your daughter is a medical mystery to us, right now, Mr. Y/L/N. With your permission, we would like to take a blood sample, to see if theres maybe something strange going on within her,” the doctor said to your father, who had a nervous hand running through his hair.

“No. Absolutely not. If she’s healed, then I’m taking her home. She has school, after all,” he said, gathering your things. Dr. Collins was trying to get him to stop for a moment, but your father wasn’t having it.

“Sir, I really don’t think thats the best thing to do right now. If we can figure out what exactly is going on, we could potentially help so many people,” the doctor said, trying to convince him. Your father still refused, he didn’t want them poking and prodding at you, and since you were still a minor, you didn’t have much of a say.

“Like I said, absolutely not. If she want’s to do this when she’s eighteen, thats going to be her decision. But while she’s under my protection, I’m going to have to say no,” He signed the discharge papers, and you were out.

It was a bit irrational, but you knew why your father said no. Your mother died in the same hospital three years ago, after a gunshot to the abdomen. She had lost too much blood, and the doctors couldn’t do anything. Your father blamed the doctors and the hospital, so he was reluctant to even take you for minor injuries.

You decided not to break the awkward silence in the car, so instead you took out your phone and texted Peter.

[Y/N] guess whatttttt

[P.P.] what????

[Y/N] i got discharged!! i still have to go to school though :((

[P.P.] its only 7:30am how are you out so soon?? i was sure they would keep you at least until noon

[P.P.] also yikes @ the school thing

[Y/N] apparently my bones healed overnight its super weird

[Y/N] OMG WAIT AM I A SUPERHERO

[Y/N] SHIT I COULD BE LIKE SPIDERGIRL OR SOMETHING

[Y/N] brb trying to shoot webs rn

[Y/N] catch me as the next member of the avengers bb

[P.P.] im sure spiderman would love to have you as his sidekick

[Y/N] LISTEN BUDDY I AM NOT A SIDEKICK

[Y/N] if either one of us had to be a sidekick its you peter parkour

[P.P.] keep telling yourself that lol

[P.P.] wait did you just call me parkour

[Y/N] yep i did meanie

You slipped your phone into your pocket chuckling when your dad pulled up in front of your house.

“Go take a quick shower and change your clothes, Y/N. I gotta have you at school for third period,” he said, chuckling at your groan.

“Do I have to go? Its not like anyone would miss me, dad,” you said, giving your best puppy dog eyes. He almost fell for it, but shook his head at the last second, telling you that you had to go.

You trudged into the house, dreading going to school. Another groan escaped your lips as you realized that you had practice today, and since your rib was healed, you couldn’t use that as an excuse. You took your sweet time getting ready, much to your fathers chagrin. You were finally dressed and ready to go an hour later, your dad shaking his head, because it shouldn’t take that long for someone to shower and put on a hoodie with sweats.

You rode the whole car ride with your hood up, headphones in. When your dad finally pulled up in front of the school, you left the car reluctantly, backpack hanging off one shoulder.

Your hood was still up, and you sat down in third period physics with a sigh. Formulas littered the board, a barely audible groan escaped, as Peter looked over from the seat next you, chuckling. Your teacher was going on about angular velocity at the moment, but everything went in one ear and out the other.

“You look like hell, spider-girl,” he said, trying to contain a laugh. You shot a glare his way, tightening your hood around your face. You slumped further down in your chair, wishing you were invisible, or sleeping.

“I feel like it too, parkour. I’d rather be back at the hospital being tested, dude. Anything would be better than physics right now,” you said, pouting and turning back to the notes on the board.

The rest of the day went by rather slowly, until you got to practice. You jogged onto the field, greeting the rest of your team and your coach. She told you to take it easy, but you had no intention of actually listening.

The drill that was currently going on was weaving, your favorite. The ball had started at you, and was going smoothly until the two girls with you decided only to pass to each other. This frustrated you, as you knew they just wanted to pity you for being hurt the day prior.

You let out an angry groan, charging after the ball even though it wasn’t your turn. If they don’t want to play fair, we won’t.

You dribbled the ball down the field, people were yelling at you, but you drowned it out. Your team’s goalie looked more than ready to block your shot, but all it took was a fake left and shot right to score on her.

Adrenaline pumped through you as you smiled, walking back up the field. You heard someone cheering for you on the sidelines, surprised to see Peter in the stands. Your smile grew wider, and you waved to him, acknowledging his cheering.

You could have sworn you heard him yell ‘thats my girl’ but you just shook it off, deducing that your ears were playing tricks on you.

“Y/L/N, what the hell was that? You just screwed up that whole drill! Not cool, Y/N,” one of the girls, Casey Jones, said, looking aggravated. You scoffed, ready to fight back, but your coach spoke up for you.

“No, she did exactly what I would have done. You two weren’t passing to her. This drill is about team work, not exclusion. So, if I’m not mistaken, Casey, you and Adriana are the ones who are ‘not cool’. You two can sit on the sidelines and watch until you figure out how to work as a team,” your coach said, earning glares from the two girls as they walked to the side, but ultimately they stopped talking.

“Thanks, coach,” you said, giving her a small, grateful smile. She clapped you on the back, turning away.

“Its no big deal, really. I’m proud of you for taking charge in that drill, you executed that shot perfectly, Y/N, and apparently I’m not the only one who thinks so,” she said, nodding her head toward Peter.

“Oh, we’re not together, coach. Its..complicated,” you said, before taking a sip of your water.

“I saw him with you at the nurse’s office the other day, you two looked pretty cozy. But, if you say its nothing, then I guess I have to believe it. All I’m gonna say is that you could have fooled me,” and with that, your coach turned and walked back onto the field, leaving you standing there, smiling like an idiot.

You looked back over, looking to see if he was still there. He wasn’t in the stands anymore, he was talking to Liz Toomes. Of course, I should have known. Every negative possibility ran through your head in that moment.

You jogged off the field, trying to figure out why Liz was the center of his attention. He had been so flirty with you, even going to the lengths of setting up a date, and you couldn’t help but wonder if his intentions with you were simply platonic. You knew he had a ‘crush’ on Liz last year, he was always staring at her, he even took her to homecoming! It hurt you, you had really thought that he was over her.

Granted, you did have a boyfriend last year, that was the only reason for why Peter went after Liz. Of course, you didn’t know that. He was seeking comfort, since you couldn’t be his at the time.

Your boyfriend had broken up with you over the summer, and it made you sad to say the least. The two of you were in love, or so you thought. He was cheating on you with a girl on your team, forcing you to question the integrity of the whole relationship.

Even when he broke up with you, it was done maliciously, he never wanted you to date anyone else. He decided that it would be best to break your spirit, not just your heart. In turn, you moped around for all of August, barely wanting to go outside. 

You barely even got out of bed. Your family had no idea what to do, your brother would try to comfort you, by bringing in little lego creations. Your father bought endless pints of ice cream, it was a wonder how you didn’t weigh 300 pounds by the end of summer. He had never been on the receiving end of a breakup, he had no idea how to get you through it.

He decided it might help to call his old college friend, May Parker. Unfortunately, she couldn’t make it, so she sent Peter instead, knowing that the two of you went to school together (and because he had a crush on you, but he didn’t know that she knew).

Of course, Peter was over the moon that he got to see you, but also heartbroken at the sight of your sadness. He broke things off with Liz that same week, but the two were still friends. He did everything that he could to make you feel better, he even sat through your favorite Disney movies with you.

It was perfect, but only lasted for a few days. You both had obligations, Peter with his Stark Internship, and you with your volunteer work. The two of you didn’t see each other again until school, and that brings us to the current time.

After seeing Peter with Liz, you went to the locker room, muttering under your breath. You slammed your locker closed, the girls around you jumping at the sudden noise. You whispered a quick ‘sorry,’ and left the room. You moved through the halls of your school quickly, hood up trying not to draw any attention to yourself.

It wasn’t unlike you to be seen in the library, its where you went to cool off. You settled into a chair in the back, cracking open the first book you pulled off the shelf, which happened to be 'Norse Myths and Gods: A History.’

You loved reading about mythology and gods from all cultures, it fascinated you to every extent of the word. You opened the book to see weapons and tools, your eyes falling on one, called the Megingjörð. Apparently, it was a belt worn by Thor, God of Thunder, said to double his strengths, but current whereabouts are unknown, if it was even real.

You were shaken out of your concentration when a body plopped down in front of you, causing you to jump a bit. You looked up, eyes falling on the one person you didn’t want to see.

“Norse Gods, huh? You know Tony Stark’s met Thor? Apparently he’s a super cool dude, super buff, too,” Peter said, flipping through the book. You pulled the book out of his hands, eyes focusing back on the page.

Without looking up, you replied flatly, “Thats nice, Peter.”

You saw his face drop from your peripheral vision, and he looked down at his hands.

“Did I do something? Y/N, whats going on?” He asked, barely a whisper. Your heart nearly broke at the sight, he looked genuinely upset.

“No, nothing. Its my fault for thinking that someone would actually want to be with me. But I guess I don’t really deserve to be happy,” you said, trying to focus on the book instead of looking at him. He grabbed your hand, desperately trying to figure out why you would say such a thing.

“Y/N, why would you think that? Did someone say something to you? ‘Cause if they did I’ll beat them up, I swear,” He said, puffing his chest outward, you caught your lips turning upward.

“No one had to say anything, Peter. I saw you talking to Liz earlier, so if you want, you can go talk to her and let me wallow in my pity party,” you took your hand from his, putting your attention back on the page of the book.

He looked around, trying to get a sense of what was going on, and then it clicked. “Y/N, can you look at me please? Are you jealous of Liz?” he said, pushing the book down with a finger.

You huffed, closing the book and looking dead at him. “What do you think?”

“I think that you have absolutely no reason to be jealous. She’s in my calculus class, and needed the notes from todays lesson. And if we’re really talking about deserving things right now, I honestly think you deserve the world. Come on, I have something to show you,” He grabbed your hand, pulling you up. You barely had time to grab your bag off the floor, he was pulling you to the door.

He took you in front of a set of lockers, nothing particularly out of the ordinary. “Okay, you have to promise not to tell anyone about what I’m about to show you. I need you to swear, Y/N,” he was looking you in the eye, holding a pinky out for you to swear on.

You grabbed his pinky with yours, rolling your eyes. “Alright, so whats so special about this set of lockers?”

A grin crossed his features, as he looked from you to the lockers. He bent down, and with seemingly no effort at all, he picked up the set of lockers, pulling out a small bottle.

“Dude, what the hell?! How did you just pick up those lockers? They have to weigh like a thousand pounds!”

He didn’t answer the question, instead just tossing you the bottle of a very sticky substance. “Uh, Peter, I know we’re close and all, but I don’t know if we’re this close.”

Peter looked confused for a moment, before disgust and amusement both appeared on his face at the same time. “Ugh, Y/N, thats so gross. Why would I keep that in a bottle?”

You shrugged, looking between the bottle and the boy in front of you. “So what is it?”

“This, is my Stark Internship. This stuff is the webbing that Spider-man uses. I made it myself,” he said, looking awfully proud of his creation.

“Wait, theres no way. Why would Tony Stark ask a sixteen year old to make Spider-man’s web fluid?” you asked, placing one hand on your hip and looking closely at the bottle.

“It’s a story for another day. Look, I can prove to you that this is the web fluid. Do you trust me?” he said, holding out a hand, which you reluctantly took.

“I guess so, why? How do you plan on proving it?” he again neglected to answer the question, taking the bottle from your hand and pulling you away from the school. You walked with him until the two of you reached an alleyway, your skepticism only growing.

He placed his bag down on the floor, reaching into it. He dug around for a moment, before seemingly landing on what he was looking for. He pulled out a small contraption, it looked like a high tech bracelet of some sort.

“You pulled me all the way out here for a damn bracelet?” you asked, growing frustrated with the boy for the lack of answers you were receiving.

“Just watch, its worth it, I promise.” He said, pulling the gadget onto his wrist. He stepped away from you, aiming his hand at a fire escape that was around three stories high.

“Are you sure this isn’t dangerous, Peter? What if you fall?” you asked, crossing your arms over your chest. He shot you a smile, before shooting his web at the fire escape. It brought him up effortlessly, and he landed with such grace that it seemed like he’d done this a million times over.

You stood there, mouth agape, as the realization dawned on you.

Holy shit, Peter Parker is Spider-man.