#...yeah this can't be a permanent arrangement

[whatifyoulivelikethat]

yes or no?, m | jjk

pairing(s): jungkook x reader, slight yoongi x reader

summary: Jeon Jungkook is distraught to know he can't jack off. After all, he spent all that money to complete his tattoo sleeve. He wasn't about to ruin all that hard work just for a quick nut. But it's going to take a while to heal. Days – no, weeks! – with no masturbating. Waaah! Why did he pick his right arm?! Thankfully, noona to the rescue... right? RIGHT?!

warnings: rated M (18+) for language; slight crack b/c JK's POV; JK is whipped, welp; smut (fem reader, minor D/s dynamics, sexual fantasies, heavy petting / teasing, cock-and-ball torture, finger sucking, spit kink, handjob / m-masturbation, edging / orgasm denial, hair-pulling kink, nipple play, m-receiving oral, multiple orgasms, mentioned forearm kink); noona!reader; pleasure is JK-focused and JK's POV

'magic-8' ball noona is back! no need to read, just know there's a yoongi x reader x jk sex triangle and they're roommates :D

--

Jeon Jungkook was in pain, horny, and depressed.

On the plus side, his tattoo sleeve was almost completed!

Woohoo!

Sigh, no, he still felt like throwing himself into a wall and sliding down to become an unmoving puddle of goo. So tired. He always felt like this after the adrenaline of a long tattoo session. Session days were fun while he was in the studio hanging out with the tattoo artist, even for hours on end. He had brought his own snacks, plenty of water, and pain medication. The artist had even brought lunch for him – probably because Jungkook was spending a LOT of money covering up some old tattoos he ragretted regretted, but hey! Free food! Jungkook was always happy to receive free meat!

Wait. That sound weird.

Eh.

Anyway.

He sighed as he fumbled with his keys, trying to use his left hand as much as possible. Today, the artist had worked on his right forearm and filling in his elbow with black. The skin there was irritated and covered in plastic, which made it annoying to do common tasks he noticed. Great. Another day of not getting off. Yeah, Jungkook loved getting tattoos but it made him grumpy that he couldn’t just jerk off whenever he wanted.

What?!

It was a legitimate reason to be grumpy, dammit.

Why did Jungkook pick his right arm for his tattoo sleeve? Simple. He had no foresight and tattoos were permanent. Whoops. (He was not an idiot. Trust.) He finally got the key into the lock and turned it. His life wouldn’t be so hard (keke) if it wasn’t for his current living arrangements. To be clear, he really did love living in Kim Seokjin’s house full of his friends. There was just one problem. One very sexy problem.

He opened the door cautiously, wondering if he would hear moaning today.

Silence.

Whew.

The house smelled really good though. Like food. Mmmm. Food. Jungkook wandered in, loosely holding onto the strap of his large black bag and stepping out of his shoes, neatly settling them into their spot… to avoid getting scolded later. He was a good boy.

Sometimes.

The current residents of the home were: Kim Seokjin, the owner of the house, actor, and professional whaler in too many games; Kim Taehyung, a fashion model and close friend that had taken over Park Jimin’s spot after Jimin had moved out to work overseas for a while; Min Yoongi, a music producer and quite possibly sex on legs (Taehyung’s words, one had to be there for it to be funny); and the Magic-8 ball noona. The only girl. Also, she was, erm, part of a consensual sex triangle that Jungkook was a member of but he definitely didn’t start it.

Really…!

Anyway.

She had a real name but Jungkook was always going to remember that cursed hunk of plastic denying him twenty-six times. Besides, it was just easier to refer to her as noona since she was the one female and older than him. It was proper and polite. She was only by name when he was on his knees and begging to cum.

Cough.

Anyway!

He made his way into the kitchen carefully. It wasn’t unusual for the house to be fairly quiet as it was quite common for the introverts to split up and occupy themselves with their respective hobbies, especially when Taehyung went out with his friends. Jungkook vaguely remembered Taehyung saying he was going to a sauna with his squad or something like that. Seokjin was probably playing MapleStory in the master bedroom with his headphones on. Something about a new update. He wasn’t coming out unless to eat and even that would be rare. Yoongi and noona… well, they were either fucking or holed up in their respective rooms being creative.

Oh.

Yeah, did he mention the other part of this sex triangle was his sharp-witted, cat-eyed, resting-bitch-face-but-secretly-a-tsundere hyung? And the first place Jungkook witnessed Yoongi and her having sex was the kitchen he was about to walk into? His dick twitched every time he entered the kitchen because of it. He both felt guilty and became aroused by the wrongness of it. Then got more turned on when he remembered that he couldn’t masturbate tonight. Maybe he should just touch himself with his left hand to relieve some pressure. Or make it worse. On purpose.

Ugh, maybe he really was a masochist.

Jungkook rounded the corner and yelped when found himself cornered by his hyung and his noona glaring at him.

“Wah!”

“Oh, look who decided to show up,” his grumpy hyung grumbled.

“There you are,” his mischievous noona mused, waving about a ladle like it was a magic wand. “Sit down, sit down. You must be hungry after a long day.”

“Why didn’t you text? We ended up having dinner without you, hah,” Yoongi hmphed, poking Jungkook in the chest. The older male looked tired and overworked. One glance between the glowing, calm smile to Yoongi’s messy black hair sticking up in every direction. It was pretty clear what went down. RIP, hyung. His hyung was wearing an elegant black silk pajama shirt and matching pants with the waistband slightly askew. Red mark on the fair skin of his exposed collarbone.

Here? Or in her bed? Or in his bed? Or… mine so it smells just like them?

It was an irrelevant thought, as Jungkook rarely slept in his own bed despite having one. He had a bad habit unique quirk of falling asleep wherever he was, whenever he felt the need to sleep. This greatly annoyed Seokjin and made Taehyung laugh. Sometimes Jungkook would wake up with the latter guy sleeping on top of him like a handsome sloth. Just Taehyung things. But most times, Jungkook was in his noona’s bed.

Hey! It was a comfy bed.

Ahem.

Jungkook received another sharp poke and he jumped, stumbling as he was pushed to the kitchen island, extra startled as Yoongi wordlessly pulled out the seat for him. He got a what? look in response, complete with black strands falling over those narrowed dark brown eyes.

“Don’t you have to be careful about your arm, especially the first night?” Yoongi puffed. “Don’t get used to it.”

“O-Oh… yeah… t-thanks, hyung.”

Yoongi pretended not to hear and scooted himself towards the stove. She was standing next to a pot on low heat looking remarkably put together in red plaid pajamas. Jungkook plopped his butt onto the tall chair and put his bag on the other, yanking off his beanie. Ruffled his hair quickly to avoid his short black hair looking flat and dumb. He pretended like he wasn’t checking out the way her juicy butt completely filled out the pants and the way they clung to her lush hips. He pretended he didn’t notice that the top was relatively cropped and he could clearly see her amazing waist to ass ratio. He definitely didn’t say anything about how nice it was to see the beautiful curve of her neck due to the cute sheep-shaped claw clip collecting her hair back. And he surely didn’t go completely breathless when she turned around with a steaming bowl, suddenly realizing her pajama shirt was held together by only a single button in the center and she clearly wasn’t wearing a bra. There was a row of buttons; she just hadn’t done them up.

Fuck.

It was violently unfair that she was allowed to look this hot in normal clothes.

She leaned over the counter and placed the bowl in front of him. He could see down her shirt. Damn. Even through the flannel fabric, Jungkook could still see the peaks of her nipples if he really stared. Really, really stared. For maybe ten seconds.

He jumped at the clink of a metal spoon against ceramic.

“You should eat,” she said with an enigmatic smile. Gracefully balanced her chin on the back of her knuckles, her fingers fanned downwards, her elbows resting on the counter to look into his eyes.

Shit, he was smooth melting like butter under that hot gaze.

“Pick your jaw off the floor,” said a gruff voice in Daegu satoori.

Jungkook jolted as crabby Yoongi appeared seemingly out of nowhere – well, he was here the whole time, oop – and cocked an eyebrow at him. Now the older two were both standing side by side, observing him expectantly. It was only then that Jungkook looked down and realized what was in front of him.

“Wait… it’s not my birthday.”

She chuckled. Her eyes sparkled with mirth. Ugh, he loved seeing them directed at him. “Seaweed soup will be good after a long tattoo day. You need nutrients. You need energy. Plus, Yoongi added beef in there for you. There’s some rice too, but not too much because Yoongi said you don’t like having too many carbs before sleeping. More meat, as you like it,” she concluded, using the spoon to show him all the ingredients. “We made it for you. Eat.”

She smiled exactly how the Cheshire cat would grin. He glanced at Yoongi who was staring at his fingernails like they were the most interesting thing in the world. They stood close to each other. No mistaking their closeness. The worst (best?) part was that even though Jungkook knew exactly what had happened while he was gone all those hours, he didn’t find this scene offensive.

In fact, he felt a bit teary from their consideration.

“T-Thanks…”

He took the spoon from her, his inhale hitching as his fingertips brushed against hers. Oh, her hands. Those lovely hands. His gaze shifted up, his heart beating fast. The side of her lips tugged upwards.

A smile turned smirk.

His cock twitched as Jungkook remembered her smirking face grinning up at him with his cum drenched all over her tongue. The last time he had jacked off into her mouth.

Argh!

He had used his left hand, mostly because he wasn’t sure if he was supposed to do the repeated motion of bending his right arm and bringing the utensil to his mouth right now. Hmmmm. He scrunched up his face and wrinkled his nose. It probably wouldn’t be the best idea. He didn’t want to mess up the line work and all that nice color shading. He was already doing the cover ups, after all. Plus, it did hurt a little moving too much. He would just see how far he could get. It was pretty easy since it was soup and the pieces of beef were cut pretty small.

They must have thought of that.

Jungkook tried not to cry grateful tears into his seaweed soup as he heard his hyung and noona busy themselves with cleaning the kitchen, ‘cause that would be utterly embarrassing and not very manly, sniff.

Thankfully, he was saved by his rising boner.

The thing was, Jungkook was pretty sure he wasn’t turned on by pain. Ahem. Okay, maybe a little (lotta) bit. But, time and place! This was precisely why he picked a very cool and very talented male tattoo artist. He could ask questions and be noisy and immature and not feel bad. Jungkook liked female artists but he would get too mentally distracted because he didn’t really know what to talk about, so his mind would end up wandering to another set of hands and then, bam! A not useful boner. Also, he didn’t want to creep anybody out or make them uncomfortable. That would be mean.

But, uh.

Jungkook was beginning to realize he enjoyed and hated these long sessions. He enjoyed them because he very much considered his tattoo artist his friend. He enjoyed them because his close friends were supportive, bought him snacks, and told him he was cool or brave for getting so many tattoos (very important, yup). And, yeah, he liked the repeated stabbing (it was addictive, okay?!). But he also enjoyed them because of how attentive his noona was before and during the aftercare process. She helped him prepare his bag prior to the appointment, would make sure to remind him to keep the area hydrated, make him his favorite meals (meat!), and be the first to help him in case he needed it. As for the hate part…

Ugh, it made him so fucking horny knowing he couldn’t get off without her help.

Yeah, sure, he could use his left hand. But the nut would be pisslow awful and not at all satisfying. Of course, Jungkook could wait and use his right when he felt like it was fine but that wouldn’t be for a while. He didn’t spend all that money to have to explain that he wanted a touch-up because he needed to cum being around a literal sex goddess his noona (not to mention what a mortifying thing to say to his poor tattoo artist that didn’t need to know all that). And there was no way in hell Jungkook was going to avoid his noona during his recovery. She had just made him seaweed soup! Oh, yeah, and Yoongi was there too. Anyway, the forced waiting turned him on even more than usual because there was a real reason behind it. After his first long session, he even clumsily edged himself with his left hand, multiple times, before he asked her to get him off, just so it felt even better when her lips closed around his leaking, desperate cock.

Jungkook choked on some beef.

“Are you okay?”

“I’m – ack! – fine. Totally fine!” he managed to hack out in a very not-fine tone.

“You look like you’re choking,” Yoongi commented matter-of-factly, eerily similar to a narrator of a nature documentary.

“Be careful,” she laughed, coming around the counter to rub his back. Aaaah! Jungkook lifted his right arm slightly and tried to subtly punch his dick down into submission but, as it turned out, his erection was as stubborn as he was. Awesome. Not to mention space was very limited under the counter. Shit. She patted in between his shoulder blades. “Want some water?”

“No, hah, I’m f-fine,” he wheezed, freezing up a little at her touch. He thought he was used to it by now but he really wasn’t, especially when his dick was already halfway up the stairs to heaven. Down to hell to the circle of lust? Whatever. She wasn’t too close, as she was on his right side, but he had enough memories to know how skin-to skin felt, enough times of her breasts pressed to his back and her hands exploring his chest, enough moments of her agile fingers splayed out over his pecs like blooming flowers, running her nails over his skin, flicking his nipples, all the while tracing her tongue along the base of his neck with her hard nipples rubbing against his shivering back…

Okay.

Jungkook was not fine.

“It’s kinda warm…” he mumbled as she moved away.

“That’s because you’re still wearing your jacket and having hot soup,” Yoongi pointed out, putting away some bowls. “Take it off.”

“Want help?”

It was a very innocent suggestion. Thus, Jungkook spent the next minute trying not to reveal that he had popped a boner while eating seaweed soup, sitting up and sticking out his arms like a Ken doll, letting those dreamy, long fingers peel away his oversized white and black racer jacket. Left arm first, then the right, taking care to slide it off, the sleeve cocoon stripping back to reveal the beautiful butterfly that was his fresh, brightly inked right arm.

“Oh? That’s right, you were covering up some big tattoos today, huh?” Yoongi perked up, his raspy voice with a twinge of curiosity, padding over to investigate. Underneath the jacket, Jungkook had worn a closely fitted, white, ribbed tank top. Comfy but wouldn’t get in the way. “Ho, so much color. Quite rockstar of you. You’re become such a cool guy, heh.”

“I wanted the individual images to stand out more and the artist suggested adding some color,” Jungkook clarified, slurping away at his dinner again. “I just trusted him.”

“He did such a good job,” she was saying, delicately holding his hand. Jungkook tried not to melt into a puddle. “The gradient is fantastic. The text here looks cleaner too.”

“Oh, yeah, I asked him to clean up some of my older tattoos too. For consistency.”

He continued munching happily until…

“So, what’s with the boner?”

Jungkook nearly choked again.

“Ay, Yoongi-ssi, leave him alone,” she chided, smacking Yoongi in the butt. Received a scalding squinty side-eye in response but she didn’t seem to give a shit. Nerves of steel. “You know he can’t cum unless I let him.”

Wow, okay, way to broadcast the facts!

“Hey!”

She tilted her head and rubbed the tip of his nose. Open-mouthed smirk included. Gulp. “Am I wrong?”

Against his better judgement, Jungkook pouted. “Noona…”

She patted his thigh. Condescendingly. He intensified his pout but it was futile. “Finish eating, okay? I’ll help you out in the shower…” She winked, devilish. “As usual.”

Yoongi snickered. “Just don’t be too loud.”

“Put on some headphones then,” she countered.

“Oi, I’m not blowing out my eardrums.”

“Then listen,” she hummed, caressing Jungkook’s jeans. “Or watch. No one’s stopping you.”

The bottom of Yoongi’s lips upturned, giving him the expression of a disgruntled cat. “I have to sleep.”

“Oh, like you don’t sleep enough, grandpa.”

“That wasn’t what you were calling me when I had you folded in half under me.”

Jungkook was left to slurp his soup to the sound of their bickering as her hand gently stroked the inside of his thigh. It could be worse. Could be better too, like her unzipping him and establishing dominance by jacking him off at the kitchen island. But Yoongi was not so easily fazed, so she didn’t, and Jungkook cried at (and secretly enjoyed) the feeling of pre-cum soaking through his underwear.

Turns out, he didn’t have to wait that long to enjoy suffering.

Er.

Attention?

Towards the end of his meal was getting a bit annoying to scoop up what was left, so Jungkook put down the spoon to pick up the bowl and drink of the rest of the soup. For a brief second, he was let go and he noticed Yoongi was flicking his hand over his noona’s chest. She grabbed his hand, pulling that scowling face to her into a sudden and tense kiss. Hey, he wasn’t above some adult entertainment while eating. Well, maybe not during the majority of the meal, but Jungkook kept a (big) peeper out. From his periphery, he saw Yoongi slip his hands under her shirt and heard her murmur in satisfaction, trailing kisses over Yoongi’s face. He saw his hyung smile in response, warm and genuine and butterfly-inducing.

Jungkook lowered the bowl slowly as Yoongi opened his eyes.

And winked.

Devilish.

“I’m leaving,” Yoongi suddenly announced, untangling himself and slinking away.

His noona snickered and shook her head. “Okay, nerd.”

Then she turned around and, before Jungkook could say anything about Yoongi running away like a criminal undercover, she revealed that her shirt was now open and fully exposing her perky tits and large, hard nipples.

“Oh!”

Jungkook felt his eyeballs nearly pop out of his skull at the unexpected surprise.

She acted as if they could ever have a normal conversation with her boobs right in front of his face. “So, are you still tired? Just wanna get washed up and go to sleep?”

He tried to answer but from the first word it was impossible. Her pajama shirt was sliding down her perfect shoulders, revealing smooth skin and the flannel fabric cradled her breasts, framing them perfectly. She smelled fresh and fruity, just like her signature lotion scent. Blackberry and vanilla. Her forearms lay against his thighs, forcing his body to turn, and he gasped as her fingers fanned out over his muscular thighs and squeezed them, basically half-crawling into his lap to look up at him, asking her questions in a very leisurely and unbothered tone.

“Tired…?” he echoed, his brain in a completely different dimension. “Wuh?”

Her hands glided up his sides and delicately closed in around his waist. He gasped, stiffening as her touch encased him, feeling the action through the fabric of his tank top. She hummed softly, caressing his waist. Slow. Tender. Not a second of rushing even though blood was rushing straight down into his dick at record speed. He felt her gaze on him and shifted his own to her face, seeing her observe him with lovely eyes that contained all the innocence of a kumiho.

So, none at all.

Her smile reappeared, mysterious and sinful.

Her palm grazed over his tense abdomen and he whimpered under his breath. Or so he thought.

“Feeling good?” she asked serenely.

“Y… Yeah…”

Down. Tracing the button of his jeans. His breath caught in his throat. Fingertip by fingertip, in slow motion, tapping lightly on his bulge. Barely any pressure. Solidly tucked between his legs, her ass sticking out. He would be fine with the other side of the view too. This house needed more mirrors, Jungkook concluded.

“Do you remember why you came to me?”

He stopped staring at her ass as the question registered. He was holding his right arm out and his left elbow was resting on the counter. “In the beginning?”

“Mhm.”

She was now cupping his covered erection and pulsing her grip around it, making his cock throb and leak everywhere. Great. His boxer briefs were a cum-filled mess now, surely. He could feel the squish and the stimulation against the tip. Agonizing pleasure.

His cheeks warmed. “Ah… Yeah… because… my previous girlfriends said I f-fucked like a robot…”

“You think maybe you just weren’t that into them?” she questioned, running her fingertips of her other hand along his back and waist, sending tingles up his spine.

“I…” It was impossible to concentrate. “Ah… Well… A-Aren’t you supposed to fall f-for their personality first…?”

“Is that why you’re into me? My personality?”

Jungkook looked down.

Right at her personali-titties.

He swallowed so hard that he almost choked.

Again.

“Hm?” she mused.

Ripped his gaze from the visual of her prominent nipples hanging down next to his open thighs and into that sly stare that knew everything. Gulp. She continued toying with his crotch, stroking along the length, dipping down to pat the outline of his balls, smirking wider as his cock jerked in his pants. The roar of his heartbeat thundered in his ears. Fuck. It was the power in that gaze. The confidence in her stance. The ability to be below him and be completely, utterly in control. The taste of forbidden fruit, just within reach. The sensation of his whole body being overcome with want and the way she gladly overwhelmed all his senses by her presence alone. She didn’t have to touch him at all. She didn’t have to expose herself. She didn’t have to smell so good. She didn’t have to.

She simply chose to do all those things to drive him even more crazy.

“Yes or no?” she purred.

He could lie, but he was a terrible liar.

“Y… Yes…”

She seemed very satisfied with his response. Slid up between his legs, her hand on his back dropping and gliding up against his chest instead. He shivered, his lips parting as she rose, closer, the warmth of her exhale washing over him, a soft sigh and then their faces close, centimeters from each other with his racing heart under her palm. Her fingers spread out. Her index found his silver chain necklace resting on his collarbones, playing with it with a small smile.

Her other hand was still on top of his hard dick.

Jungkook used to think that there was no way sex could be sexy. The idea of it was sexy. In practice, sex used to be awkward and uncomfortable, but essential to get his rocks off. It felt like something he had to do. But it wasn’t like that, at least with her. Well, he still sometimes felt awkward and uncomfortable, but Jungkook suspected she was doing it on purpose. He didn’t mind though, because she always touched him with such fondness and – maybe this was the delulu talking – but he really didn’t need the sex so much as he needed her to keep looking at him the way she did.

His dick throbbed suddenly in protest.

“Ah–!”

She tilted her head and kissed him.

Placing a chaste kiss right below his lips, the soft press taking his breath away, and then her lips ghosted over his, grabbing a fistful of his tank top and kissing him deeply. Fuck, how he loved her lips. How could he describe them? So fluffy and yet so insistent. Determined, seductive, pulling him to her and sighing, her contented breath filling his lungs and giving him life. His left hand found the collar of her shirt and gripped it tightly, not even realizing he had closed his eyes instinctively, wanting nothing more than to melt into her. Her hair brushed against his cheek and neck. Her scent warmed him, sweet and decadent. Her knuckles pressed into his sternum, unyielding. Her fingers tangled into the silver chain around his neck, possessive.

His brain melted into a puddle of bliss.

He moaned her name into her lips as she parted. She squeezed his inner thigh through his loose jeans. Still, the fabric was too thick for it to be satisfying enough.

“W-Wait…”

“You kinda taste like beef,” she remarked, releasing her hold and patting his chest. “Come on. If we fuck in the kitchen, I’ll have more to clean than your dishes.”

Jungkook felt his cheeks burn. “O… Oh.”

She backed up a step and took way too long to button a single button to cover her breasts again. He spent a good ten seconds gawking at their perky shape and the way her obvious nipples stuck straight out. She acted as if nothing was wrong, lingering between his spread-open thighs.

“You have to shower quickly, right? Go get started and I’ll come wash your back.”

“But, n-noona–!”

Her hand flew up and landed at the base of his neck. Thumb to one side, four fingers on the other. Jungkook froze.

She cocked an eyebrow.

Then she smirked.

His pulse hammered in his throat, so close to being constricted.

“Are you saying you’re flexible enough to wash your own back now?”

Jungkook shook his head so fast his vision blurred. “Nope. I’m weak. Help. I can’t take off my clothes either. Owie. It hurts so much.”

“Mmmm, very convincing.” She didn’t sound convinced. At all.

Damnnit.

-

“Gah!”

She gave him an exasperated look. “As if I haven’t seen you naked before.”

Minutes later, Jungkook found himself sitting in the bathtub, puffing his cheeks as he washed his hair with his left hand and felt the bath sponge rub against his back. Ah. She was leaning over the side of the tub, holding onto his left shoulder and rubbing circles into his back. Aaaah. He had left the plastic on his right arm for now, intending to remove the tape as his last step so he could rinse it off with a gentle, unscented cleanser. The water was lukewarm. Not the greatest, but he didn’t want to steam up the bathroom. It would be bad for the tattoos.

“U-Um… noona?”

“Hm?”

She rubbed down to his lower back. He sat up straighter. There was a wet towel blanketed over his crotch. Not really for any reason other than cold. Yeah. Anyway. She leaned over and kept going, massaging him at the same time. He gasped as she pressed the base of her palm into his muscle and kneaded.

“I… uh… about what I said earlier…”

“Mhm.”

He jumped a little but she was just leaning over to grab the detachable showerhead, adjusting the water to the correct temperature. “I hope… I hope I didn’t offend you or anything. I do like your personality a lot. You’re assertive and funny and you always remember stuff I like,” Jungkook rambled, lowering his left hand. His right was slightly hanging off the edge of the tub to keep it out of the way. Of course, he scrubbed his armpits before she came in. It would have been rude not to clean all the important bits first.

She rinsed off his back. “I’m not worried,” she chuckled.

“Oh, okay.”

“I don’t mind that you’re shallow. It’s flattering, coming from a hot guy like you.”

“That’s good – wait, what?!”

She sprayed the top of his head and sent him into sputters.

“Ah!”

She grabbed his shoulder, quickly and vigorously rinsing off his hair before pulling the showerhead away and turning off the water. Not before spraying him in the chest though. Jungkook found himself with his drenched hair flat against his forehead, making him unable to see. He felt like a wet dog. He almost wiggled away – until her arm slid down and rested against his chest, her other hand slipping under his wet hair and pushing it back, laughing playfully as she spoke.

“Oh, Jungkook. You’re so silly. Don’t worry about nothing,” she sighed, petting his head.

He couldn’t say anything.

Mostly because her tits were now pressed against the top of his back.

Oh, fuck. Her large, soft nipples rubbed against his shoulders. And her breasts, ooh, so plushy. “Everyone knows you like my personality.” So bouncy. Mmmm. “Just like how everyone knows you’ve been thirsting after me since day one.” No, it was more like first thirty seconds of seeing her. “Just like how everyone knows you’re a pain slut.”

Her breasts pressed against his shoulders.

Wait.

What did she say?

She plucked the towel away from his crotch and locked her fingers around his package.

“AAH!”

She slapped a hand over his mouth and pinned him to her body, crouching over him. It was then – how could it be only THEN – that Jungkook’s brain fully registered that she was topless. Possibly bottom-less too! Not only was she naked but also she was roughly massaging his balls with his rapidly hardening length trapped between her thumb and index finger, essentially making a cock ring with her two fingers and a ball cage with the rest. He gasped, rolling his head back onto her shoulder, moaning behind her hand as her touch switched between caress and choking his balls. There was no water in the tub as the drain wasn’t pushed down.

Her hand changed from covering his mouth to slipping two fingers into his lips.

“See? You like this,” she whispered, sultry and low.

He tried to gurgle out, n-no way, but he was too busy lifting his hips and thrusting upwards, trying to get the friction he so urgently desired but couldn’t achieve. She dragged her nails across his balls and his eyelids fluttered, sucking on her fingers, spit trickling past his lips and down his chin, his moan echoing in the bathroom when she finally closed her grip around his aching cock, pumping slow, running a fingertip over the head, slicking out the pre-cum leaking out.

“P-Please…” he whined.

“You gotta get out now,” she reminded him.

“No, please…”

She slowly thrust her fingers into his mouth, rubbing his tongue. “You should wait longer, shouldn’t you?” He tried to shake his head but he couldn’t, his hips bucking as her speed increased. “Don’t want you to get sweaty and all that.” Fuck, please, he wanted to scream and nearly did when she let go and lightly smacked around his stiff erection, slapping his cock against his tense inner thighs. It bounced around, the head dark red, aching for release. He was so hard that his cock popped right back into position, sticking straight upwards between his spread legs. “Do you really think you’ve been a good boy?” His own saliva was dripping down his chin. How did she get this level of desperation out of him so easily? She held his shaft up with only the back of her thumb and firmly smacked his balls, rapid and light, making him cry out and squirm. “Hold it up.”

“N-Noona, please…”

“Hold it up if you want me to suck your dick,” she ordered calmly.

The thrill raced up his spine. His hair was dripping, droplets down his cheeks and neck. This was it. This electric, intense feeling that seemed to control him, his hand ghosting down to wrap around his twitching length, gasping sharply when her fingers left his mouth. She cupped his chin instead, tilting his head up and now they were looking at each other, only for a moment, her sparkling eyes rich with passion, intoxicating pleasure snaking up his core as he melted under her hot gaze.

This was the feeling Jungkook always wanted.

She lowered herself down. He stared at the ceiling as she teased his balls, moaning and lazily stroking his cock as she slapped them, dragged her fingernails over them, squeezed them. Spit on him. He whimpered, teasing the underside of the swollen head of his cock, more, flinching as she spat on him again, gasping as she dug her nails into the sensitive area behind his balls, coaxing himself to the edge and then stopping, building the frustration.

She kissed his hot cheek.

“You’re doing so good,” she murmured into his ear, licking it softly.

Her right hand closed around his left and they edged him together, their fingers laced, her teeth on the curve of his ear and his moan radiating off the tiles. Long, deep strokes, building up the speed. So good. Tight, rapid pace, close, his chest rattling, so close, his eyes rolling back when her hand clamped around the base of his aching cock and squeezed hard, cutting off the high and colliding him into the mental wall, his dismayed cry drowned out by her lips devouring his.

Fuck!

Was he going to get to bust a nut or not?!

-

“Please, don’t.”

He put on his best pout as she held the Magic-8 ball in front of her body. Still wearing her black seamless panties, but that was it. She was lightly sitting on his thighs, straddling him on the bed as she shook it teasingly.

“Noona, come on…”

“Why not? It’ll be fun.”

She lowered it and Jungkook gasped as the black plastic ball touched his chest, wiggling uncomfortably as she rolled it back and forth. Foreign and cold. It warmed up against his skin.  She leaned over him, not adding more pressure, but giving a great full-frontal view with her breasts trapped between her upper arms.

“It won’t be fun for me,” he whined, gripping the sheets tightly.

He reached up to squeeze her breasts, using his left hand, shuddering as he felt her hard nipples against his palm, looking up to see her tongue dance at the edge of her smirk, her tousled hair trailing down her shoulder. That had been the game before. He would ask to have sex. She would shake the Magic-8 ball and get his answer – resulting in twenty-six straight refusals from that evil children’s toy. Unlucky? Maybe. Cursed? More likely. Extra cursed because it was Park Jimin who purchased and gifted her the thing.

Grr.

Jungkook was still pissed about that.

She tilted her head, sending part of her face into delicious shadow.

“We can make it a little game.”

His hand slid down her arm and covered hers.

“No games,” he begged, catching the edge of his lower lip with his teeth. Her eyes shifted down. He was playing all his cards. She muttered under her breath, hah, I love that underlip mole of yours, how can I resist a lip bite, fuck, and those cute, round, big brown eyes… all while lowering herself to him, drawn to his plea, releasing her hold on the Magic-8 ball.

She rolled it on his chest and into his open hand.

“Okay. No games.”

She kissed him again.

A claim to his lips. Soft and insistent, working him into a frenzy, making him grip that hard plastic ball tightly as his breathing shallowed, moaning as her tongue slid in, out, in, out. He felt her hands frame his head, crowning him with her fanned-out fingers. Tingling as her thumb rubbed across his temple. His jaw. His earrings, toying with them, nipping at his lower lip and sucking on it, her warm body settling between his legs, soft to hard, rubbing up against him.

Fuck.

Fuuuuck.

She pulled on his hair roughly and his lip slipped from her teeth due his own whimper, gasping hotly as her kisses danced down his throat, then running her tongue over the trail of kisses. She had a hand planted onto his chest to prevent him from arching his back, lapping at his collarbones daintily as she tugged at a fistful of his still damp hair. Sparks of pain showering down from the crown od head meeting the maddening bliss of her lips on his chest, traveling, decorating his clavicle, each mark of her teeth mirroring the redness of a fallen rose petal.

He tried to lower his chin and shuddered against the hurt, making better and worse at the same time, opening his eyes as she let go of his hair, seeing her sliding down his torso.

That ass.

He felt a nip at his nipple and his breathing hitched, snapping down to see her looking up at him, expression highly amused.

“Pretty nice ass, huh?”

No one said she was humble.

He grinned. “Yeah, I should take a pic and make it my phone background.”

She chuckled, running her tongue over his hard nipple and Jungkook shivered, transfixed by the image and the simultaneous surge of pleasure. He lifted his head higher off the pillow. Shallow breaths, watching, the glossy tip of that dexterous pink muscle against his dark nipple, her lips closing around it, feeling his body stiffen as he felt the sucking sensation vibrate through him. The moan bubbled in his tightened chest as she gently bit, licked, sucked, alternating between the actions. Her fingernails dragged over his sides and flexed abs, electrifying his skin with the pressure. He flinched when she released him and replaced the rough play with kisses, moving across his chest to do the same to his other nipple.

She glanced at him, witnessing his perverse enjoyment with a knowing glint in her eye.

He clutched the Magic-8 ball at his side with in his left hand, falling back into the pillow moaning, writhing slightly as the sucking intensified. Her hand slid down, stroking the inside of his thigh. He could barely feel the side of his half-hard cock brush against the back of her hand.

“F-Fuck… please…”

His entire body jolted when she popped her lips off him and sealed her work with a kiss.

“You’re so impatient, Jungkook,” she hummed, pressing her tongue flat to his nipple and rubbing roughly, saliva sticking to his skin. “So needy.”

His mind was spinning. Blood running hot under his skin, body uncontrollably quivering, clutching the sheets and the Magic-8 ball for dear life. The pent-up arousal was driving him insane but, as a wise man once said, gotaa go insane to stay sane. Or something like that. Jungkook couldn’t remember any wise proverbs right now. He was too horny. She was rising, re-clipping her hair with that cute sheep-shaped claw clip, keeping it out of her smirking face.

“Y-Yes, I am needy… a-ah… please…”

Slipping down, down.

She pressed her palms into the innermost part of his thighs, spreading her fingers over his crotch, and swallowed his cock.

He moaned so loud that Min Yoongi surely heard.

Hey.

No one said Jeon Jungkook was subtle.

Especially when being pleasured.

Immediately his cock swelled at her up-and-down motion that came with tongue and lips and a tight, wet, warm throat that pushed him in as deep as possible. He was always somewhat shocked at how easily she maneuvered him without her hands, preferring instead to use only her mouth to take him all the way to the base and lick at his balls, her constricting throat suffocating the thick head of his cock, and then back up, running the sensitive skin over the roof of her mouth and closing her lips around the tip tighter, teasing the underside of the slit with deft flicks. Then, again, swallowing his growing length, molding her tongue to his girth, slathering saliva over his balls.

God, Jungkook loved the bed suck.

She had an immaculate level of control when giving a blowjob on the bed. He didn’t have to do anything but lay back and relax, occasionally looking down to follow her head movements and see his length glistening in between her plush lips, then collapsing again as the erotic euphoria overtook him again, his chest fluttering with the intensity, his core tightening, lost in lust. He completely forgot the itchiness of his right arm. The colors were brighter under the overhead light and the lotion he had applied right before getting into bed, a sharp contrast to her bare arm against his hip, her elegant hand nestled up his side, her perfect round ass in the air. His pants blending into moans, floating on cloud nine from her tight, soft mouth and agile tongue, wondering how the fuck he got this lucky.

She’s basically a porn star in bed, Park Jimin once said.

She paused when she noticed him watching her again. Extended her pink tongue past her lips, slapping his balls and scooping them up against the base of his cock, raising an eyebrow at him.

Damn.

Truer words had never been spoken.

Then – thankfully – she returned her attention to his cock, except this time it was tighter, faster, and he gasped, feeling her push the head up and force it deeper into her throat when she descended, oh, fuck, he could see her breasts bouncing too, those perfect nipples, damn, obvious wet noises drowned out by the more obscene sounds he was making, crying out, moaning, the pace intense and deliberate and racing, and the only way he could describe it was as if somehow her mouth had become a warm, wet sleeve for his twitching cock, powerfully massaging his length all over, close, his eyes rolling back.

There.

He groaned as he shot into her suffocating throat, wanton and pathetic, finally, his mind going blank, pumping thick cum into that tight pocket and whining as she swallowed, fuck, finally, her pinning his flinching hips down as his shuddering length jerked again, another vicious throb and dripping cum, tears stinging the edge of his vision, gasping out her name as the apex of pleasure consumed his nerves and set them alight.

Fucking finally.

He felt his orgasm squish into the back of her tongue and around the aching head of his cock and he moaned. Long and loud and pornographic. He felt himself twitch in her mouth. She brought him down, slow and wet, a low hum vibrating from her throat to his cock to his core.

Jungkook panted.

Tension shimmered throughout his chest and limbs, keeping him breathless.

Wait.

Her tongue rubbed against the underside of his girth, fanning out along the pulsing, abused head, sending racing sparks over his ass and up his spine.

Wait a second.

Her fingertips glided over his slick balls, squeezing them and making him shudder at the shocking bliss.

I’m still hard.

He yelped, snapping his head down, but it was too late, too late to stop, the afterglow of his last orgasm building towards another, her head sliding up and down, her lips flush to his glossy shaft, him whimpering while he watched, shivering at the lewd image and the idea of back-to-back orgasms, so good, fuck, she looks so good and it feels so fucking amazing, the addictive adrenaline spiking, the lasting buzz radiating all over, oversensitivity increasing the forbidden pleasure, tight and wet and soft, taking him as so deep his balls slapped into her chin, the muscles of his body flexed and tense, hard underneath the soft.

His second orgasm slammed into him.

His head fell back and the pleasure swarmed him, knocking the air out of his lungs, drawing out his lustful moan, his heartbeat roaring in his ears. Her name tumbled out of his lips, praises, swears, her name again, the words mixing together on his confused tongue. She swallowed again, loud to his ears, so obvious, and he trembled all over. The sharp spasm of ecstasy left him rattled, whining, feeling her licking him again but tender, even more gentle this time, slurping around his softening cock, the sensitive skin prickling and pulsating under her warm tongue.

“So… fuck… s-so fucking good…”

Oh, how he loved the feeling of her lips and those kisses feathering his thighs, his crotch, his cock, his balls, shivering in delight, all his previous frustrations making it everything so much more satisfying.

Uh.

He didn’t just think that.

Shit.

“Man, you’re loud.”

“Gah!”

“Hey, Yoongi.”

She planted herself on top of his drenched cock, laying out all over him with her hands on his chest and shoulder. Jungkook gawked at her and then at his hyung standing there at her open bedroom door, looking around at the pastel sheep plushies decorating her room and pausing at the pink bunny and tuxedo cat plush sitting on her desk. Then those dark brown orbs moved back to her ass leaning against Jungkook’s still trembling thigh.

“You could have taken off your panties,” he grumbled in his low voice.

She turned her head to look back at Yoongi. “Sorry. I didn’t think about it since I wasn’t going to get any tonight. I didn’t know you would be watching.”

Her words made Jungkook frown. “What do you mean, you aren’t getting any?”

She faced him again, raising her eyebrows. “What are you talking about? We shouldn’t push it. You’ll get too sweaty.”

“But, noona, that’s not fair, I could…?”

Silence.

A bird cawed outside.

“Use you left hand?” Yoongi snorted. “Meh.”

She smiled. “I’ll wait. I can be patient.”

Yeah, well, guess who couldn’t be patient?

As the youngest, he protested. “You could use my thigh. Or… Or my forearm! You like that!”

“No, no. I’m fine with waiting.”

“You’re doing this on purpose! You’re torturing me by not letting me feel you cum!”

Jungkook paled as his hyung and noona grinned at the same time. Deviously. In unison. Scary as fuck. Yoongi leaned against the doorframe, arms crossed, his long black hair framing his cunning eyes and open-mouthed smirk, serving every bit the allegations of being sex on legs. Jungkook trembled as he felt her trail her fingers along the base of his neck, sensually rubbing his collarbone. Thumb on one side, four fingers on the other. Not moving up but reminding him nonetheless.

“Whatever gave you that impression?” she drawled.

They were in cahoots.

Not that Jungkook minded.

That was how he got this lucky in the first place.

The Magic-8 ball rested against his naked hip, the window reading, without a doubt.

--

masterpost

[runningfrom2am]

cold nights // part seventeen

summary: you showed him colours he knows he can't see with anyone else.

pairing: coriolanus snow x fem!reader

wc: 3.8k

masterlists / nav / requests

tags/warnings: tribute!reader and mentor!coriolanus, r is very sweet (too kind for this world. literally.), sunshine x grumpy trope kinda, he falls first, violence typical for the source material, depictions of mental illness (r has a panic attack), she's is very smart (as she should), district twelve!reader.

a/n: this is the tea guys get ready for a LOADED chapter. also,, i apologize.

my asks are also open to talk about this series! (i do have emoji anons open now too!)

send me any and all of your thoughts! here!

series masterlist // playlist

Coryo wants to ask you who that guy was- why he made you so instantly uncomfortable, and he wants to, but he's cut off before he can get a word out by someone shouting your name. You tense under his hold, freezing on the spot. Then your name comes again, and as Coryo turns to see the face of whoever it is, he was met with the very same blonde boy just a few feet away.

"Hey, leavin' already?" He asks, tilting his head at you as you turn. He doesn't even spare a glance in Coryo's direction. "Didn't even say hello."

"Oh, well, I'm just... not feeling well." You reply, dropping Coryo's hand in favour of shielding yourself around your waist.

"Oh, that's a shame. Can I walk you home?" He offers.

"I've got it, actually." Coryo answers stiffly, straightening his shoulders as he takes in the boy's attire. Blue slacks, a white T-shirt, and a buzzcut. He's a peacekeeper.

The boy looks him up and down, a smirk forming on his lips. "This is your mentor. Saw him on TV with you, I didn't realise that was a... permanent arrangement."

"Coriolanus just came to visit. He's a good friend." You say quietly, hardly to be heard over the Covey band playing in the background.

"Oh! A friend. Of course." He laughs, speaking to you, but his eyes are locked with Coryo's; unafraid, taunting. "And here I was thinking you had a type."

"Y/N has never mentioned you." Coryo states, shoving his hands into his pockets to keep himself from throwing a punch. "Who are you, exactly?"

"Right! Sorry, I'm Cole." The blonde boy replies.

Coryo could laugh. Clearly, he was local. "Should I take a blind guess at where your father works, Cole?"

His jaw tenses in response, but then he laughs. "Yeah, yeah. You'd probably be right." He reaches up, running his hand over his jaw. "You know, if Y/N isn't up to giving you a tour, maybe I could take you out in the woods and show you where your father was murdered. How does that sound, Snow?"

You look up at your friend, eyes wide. Coryo doesn't know what to say or do, but he looks pissed. "Cole, enough." You state, trying to steady the shake in your voice. "That was cruel and you know it."

"Oh, was it? Sorry." He apologizes, but he's looking past you at a seething Coriolanus. He can only hear his heartbeat in his ears, and he wants nothing more than to beat this guy to a pulp right where he stands.

"Coryo, let's just go, please..." He can suddenly hear your voice, and feel your hands against his chest, trying to urge him out the door.

"Yeah, you two head out." Cole chuckles, lifting one hand in a wave. "I'll give you some advice though, bud, you're not getting anything from her by walking her home. I've been down that road and jeez- it's really not worth it."

Coryo didn't care anymore if you were trying to get him out; he steps past you and is throwing a fist right into Cole's nose before you could make a move to stop him. Bringing up his father was one thing, saying something so disgusting about you was totally another. Coriolanus would not look past that and be a pacifist right now- even if that's what you wanted.

You stumble back with a gasp, hands flying up to cover your mouth. You stand frozen as Coryo knocks him down, laying punch after punch onto a boy you once thought of as a friend.

Hit. After. Hit.

You couldn't see his eyes. You weren't sure why you were looking. Deep down, you knew you wouldn't like what you saw.

You back up. Back, back, back until your head hits the wall and you can't keep going. You didn't realize you were breathing so fast until you started to get dizzy. People are shouting, a crowd is forming. Too many people, too much screaming- the music has stopped, and you watch from outside your body as Sejanus wraps his arms around Coriolanus's waist and yanks him back so he's standing upright again.

He wipes his bloodied mouth on his wrist, then promptly pushes his hair back out of his eyes as he spits the blood in his mouth down on Cole as he lies on the ground. Time is moving so slowly that you're not even sure he's moving. Is he dead?

Your eyes flit back up to Coriolanus again, and his eyes catch yours. You try to take a step back again, but the wall is still there. Shades of red cloud the edges of your vision, and you're stuck making eye contact with him. Frozen, and terrified.

"No- no, no Y/N, wait-" He starts to speak to you. You wonder if you're dreaming. If this was another nightmare- worse than the others. It was personal. "Y/N- hey, don't look at me like that. Come on, don't look at me like that. Talk to me." He's saying, pleading with you, and you can only read his lips as tears fall quick and heavy from your eyes.

He takes one step with empty but bloodied hands held out in front of him, and you're running. It's the worst kind of deja vu. You don't know where to go- you can't go outside. He knows where you live, where your family lives, and it's too long of a walk to be able to make it. He would catch you if you tried to run home alone.

You're trying to sprint through a crowd of drunk people, many of whom are fighting as well now, and you almost don't even notice when you take a hit to the side of the head with someone's elbow as you try and get to the back room. You don't have time to care. You look back over your shoulder, shoving your way through as quickly as you can. He's following you. You can see his blonde hair in the semi-cleared path you made for yourself.

You can't look back, you have to look forward as you dart down the dark hallway, praying that the Covey's makeshift dressing room has a lock on the door. You didn't even realize you were screaming until you slammed the door behind you, scrambling for the lock and sliding the rusty metal shut as you barricaded the door with your body.

"Y/N! Y/N, wait!" Coryo shouts, shoving his way through the crowd behind you. You can't hear him, even when he catches your eyes. That same fear behind them made his gut twist.

He only just clears the crowd behind you when someone is standing right in his path, grabbing his shoulders and shoving him back. Lucy Gray. She wasn't strong, but she needed to be. "What have you done!" She's shouting right in his face, pushing him back again, but it does little to move him. "Why would you do that in front of her?! Get out of here! Now!"

"No, no, Lucy Gray I need to-"

"Coriolanus Snow if you don't get away from her right now I swear to god I-"

"No, you don't understand I-"

"I understand damn fine, thank you!" She huffs. "Sejanus, go get Lennox."

He didn't even clock that Sejanus was holding onto him, keeping him from getting any closer to you even though you were locked behind that door he could see just feet away. He could hear you screaming, sobbing, and he only wanted to help.

"Okay, yeah. I will." Sejanus says, turning his grip onto Coryo's arm. "Come on, you gotta go."

He had seen Sejanus angry before, but it was never directed at him. "Sejanus, please, I have to help her, I can't go through this again I really-"

"You can help her by leaving."

Coryo's heart sinks in his chest, but he lets Sejanus pull him away, and he stares hopelessly back over his shoulder at the door as Lucy Gray knocks on it, talking to you through the metal barrier protecting you from him.

"Y/N/N, hey, it's me. It's Lucy Gray. You gotta let me in, sweetheart. Come on, open up." She's trying to stay calm as she knocks on the door, repeatedly trying the handle on it. "I'm alone, I promise you're safe, Y/N/N. Open the door, please."

You can hear her, but everything besides your broken sobs sounds distant as you're curled up against the opposite wall. There's not enough air in the world right now to keep you conscious- there must not be a window back here. You force yourself back onto your feet, stumbling as you try to stand up and you can hardly see. It's hot.

You look up, there's no vents. The ceiling is too high. Somehow, that makes you feel more claustrophobic.

You make your way over to the door, your palms against it and feeling soft knocks coming from the other side.

"Lucy Gray?" You sniff, unsure now that it was even her voice that you heard.

"Yes, sweetheart. It's just me, can you let me in, please?"

You take three deep breaths.

"Y/N/N?"

With a shaky hand, you reach up and slide the lock open.

She tries the handle again, looking back over her shoulder when it cracks open this time.

You step back quickly as the door is slowly pushed open, almost falling back with the urge to run. You hardly remember why you would open the door.

"Hey, hey, just me." Your best friend says, quickly closing the door again and locking it behind herself.

She eyes you carefully, and your arms are wrapped tightly around your midsection. You don't look like yourself- eyes wide with nothing more than terror behind them, like you're physically holding yourself together and it's not really working as your chest rises and falls so fast she can almost see your muscles straining to keep up. She wants nothing more than to pull you into her arms and tell you it's okay, but she's not sure touching you would be wise. "You okay, Hun?"

You look at her with tear-filled eyes, shaking your head.

"That's okay." She nods at you, understanding and filled with worry. "Do you want to sit? I'll get you some water and we can talk, okay?"

You nod, swallowing over the dryness you didn't even notice in your throat left over from all the screaming and crying. If you didn't know better, you would have thought you swallowed a full box of cotton.

Lucy Gray nods, double checking the door is locked before going over to her bag in the corner and grabbing a water bottle. You watch her the whole way and her calmness slightly soothes you, just enough to sit down at the bench and table beside you.

Lucy Gray isn't scared. You're safe here. You have to remind yourself over and over that you're safe now.

"Your brother is on his way." She assures you, sitting down across the bench from you and holding out the water she just opened for you.

"Okay." You say quietly, taking it and just holding it in your lap. You try and take a deep breath, your head falling back as you shut your eyes, trying to force the fear to leave your body.

"There you go, good. Keep breathing." You hear her tell you and you swallow again. "Can you talk to me? Tell me what happened. No one can hurt you here, I promise."

"Coryo, go home." Sejanus instructs him, turning him in the opposite direction, as if he couldn't do it himself. He had absolutely zero interest in going back to that cold empty house they had borrowed for the month.

Especially after what he had done to you. Again.

He promptly turns back around in the street. "No, I'm coming with you."

Sejanus sighs, rubbing his hands down his face. "I don't have time for this-"

"I agree. Let's go get him."

"Don't you get it?" Sejanus laughs bitterly, eyes wide with exasperation as he shakes his head. "Don't you know what you've done to her?"

"Of course I get it!" Coryo shouts in response. "I've ruined everything! I know that!"

Sejanus opens his mouth to speak, quickly shutting it again.

"I'm killing her! I'm killing her and I can hardly breathe right now and I need her to know I didn't mean to scare her and the only way I can show her that is helping her now. That's the mistake I made last time, and I won't do it again. I won't." He shakes his head, reaching up and pushing his hair back out of his eyes.

"She talked to me, on the last night I saw her. She screamed, and cried, just like that," He gestures vaguely toward the building you're still trapped inside, "and she asked if that's who I was and I couldn't tell her no. She asked if I regretted it and I do, more than anything, and I'm pretty sure she's the only damn reason why and she doesn't know that!"

"I can't lose her." He adds after a moment of the two boys just staring at each other. "Not again, Sejanus. I'm scared of who I'll be without her."

Sejanus shakes his head slightly, looking up at the stars as he takes a deep breath. He was mad at Coryo for scaring you, but he was his friend, and if this is how he wanted to help, he couldn't bring himself to push him away after he was sure that Coryo had never been so honest in his life.

"Okay. Let's go."

There are still lights on in the house when Sejanus knocks on the door. Coryo is standing at his side, chest tight. Your brother already didn't like him- he knew this wouldn't go well at all, but he couldn't walk away from you now. If it was your brother you needed, he would get him for you.

The door opens and they're lucky to see that it was Lennox who answered.

"Where's my sister?" He asks immediately, noting that you weren't with them.

"Something happened, and Lucy Gray asked us to come get you." Sejanus answers, and Coryo's breath hitches as your brother's eyes lock on him.

"What did you do?" He spits, and for a moment Coryo wonders how you could even be related.

He feels himself go pale. "I'm sorry, I really am..."

"Pa!" Your brother shouts back into the house, not giving him the chance to explain further. "We gotta go get Y/N/N, somethin' happened to her."

"What?" Your dad's voice comes next, panicked and frantic as he hurries to the door, not even bothering to grab a coat as he and his son push past the boys on the porch.

Coryo hadn't had the chance to meet him yet, and the fact that this is his first impression makes him feel ill.

"What happened, is she hurt?" He asks, stalking quickly down the front path and they follow hastily after.

"She's not hurt." Sejanus assures him quickly.

"She, uhm, maybe..." Coryo says, embarrassingly non-confident. Everyone looks at him. "She caught an elbow to the head, I couldn't stop it. I'm sorry."

"You're Coriolanus?" Your dad says, turning to look at him only briefly.

"Yes, sir."

"Thank you for coming to get us." He replies, nodding to him. "You did the right thing."

Coryo has to ignore the glares Lennox is shooting into him. He must be the only one who knows.

"We didn't know it would be unsafe for her, but we should have. I apologize." Sejanus says, and your father slightly shakes his head.

"She's got a smart head on her shoulders. She wouldn't've gone if she thought something would happen. Can't blame anyone." He replies. "There's no guidebook on how to live with this stuff."

"I have a good idea of what not to do." Lennox cuts in, and Coryo catches him staring at his bruised knuckles. He quickly tucks his hands into his pockets.

Peacekeepers had cleared out the Hob by the time they got back. Coryo recognizes the other kids in Lucy Gray's band as they stand outside, presumably waiting for her to come out. She was still with you, maybe that was a good thing.

"Tam Amber, is Lucy Gray with her?" Your father asks the boy, who nods in response.

"They won't let you in here, but go try the back door. Goes straight to our room, that's where I saw her go."

"Thanks, Son." Your father nods, lips pursed together as he pats his shoulder and quickly brushes past, rounding the side of the building.

Coryo tries to follow, but Lennox stops him abruptly with a hand on his chest. "You better go."

"Listen, I, I don't know what she told you, but-"

"She told me everything I need to know about you." He says, looking back over his shoulder at his dad knocking on the door, ear pressed to it as he calls out for you and Lucy Gray. "And I know that you being here will just make it worse. So go."

Coryo nods, running a hand down his face. "Listen, I get it, I do, but I can't lose her again. I can't. I have to explain-"

"No, no." Lennox cuts him off. Coryo is sick of people cutting him off. "Can't you just let her be happy? We're doing everything we can to convince her she's still alive- that she's safe and it was hard enough already before you showed up. Literally every night she has nightmares about you, because she trusted you. Completely. You've been here less than a day and you hurt her all over again- I can't just stand by and let that happen."

"I did it because that guy said something horrible about her- I just, I couldn't let him get away with that!" Coryo protests, scared that no one would actually give him a chance. "Last time I didn't get to talk to her and I think that's what she needs."

"Oh, you think that? That's spectacular. She'll be cured!" Lennox laughs dryly, rolling his eyes. "We don't need you to fix her. I really don't have time for this, Coryo."

He practically spits the nickname at him, laced with venom as he turns on his heel to go to the door.

Coryo groans, running his hands down his face again as he watches the door open for your brother and father.

"It's like," You take a deep, shaky breath, squeezing the water bottle you're holding in your lap. "It's like he is a different person, Lucy Gray. Do you get it now? Did you see?"

"I believe you. I always have." She nods, looking into your eyes. "I saw it, but..." She sighs, breaking eye contact with you. "I don't think he's a vicious person, Y/N. And I don't think you think that either."

You chew your lip, shaking your head as your eyes fall to the floor.

"Can I give you my opinion?" Lucy Gray asks after a moment, reaching out to hold your hand.

"Truth is truth to the end of reckoning." You say plainly, nodding and gripping onto her hand.

"There's no reckoning, love, okay? I'm your friend first and foremost. I want to help you, and I will always be honest with you." She assures you before continuing. "But I think... I think he's just a normal boy. Boys get in fights all the time-"

"Lucy Gray you didn't see it."

Your best friend is calm, despite you interrupting her. You never did that, but she knows better than to fault you for it now. "Okay, alright. What didn't I see?"

Your hair falls into your eyes as you shake your head, and you quickly push it back with your free hand to look at her. "His eyes."

"His eyes, okay... What about them?"

"He gets... It's scary. Like he wants to do it. Like he enjoys hurting people and, and-" Just recalling it makes your heart rate increase.

"Okay. I believe you." She nods, placing her other hand on yours. "But I think this is more about you than him, sweetheart."

Lucy Gray can see the confusion that knits itself into your creased brow. "It was a scary, traumatic time for you, and I think you're still recovering and that's okay. You may never be the same and that's okay. But I don't think he'd hurt you. I really don't. I think he's a good person."

"I want to think that..." You sniff, shaking your head. "but just as easily that could have been me in the arena. And just as easily that could have been you out there, or, or..." Your train of thought dissipates. "I just mean it doesn't seem that anything is stopping him."

"I don't think it could have been you. He cares about you. You told me that, remember?" She smiles softly. "I think it was inconsiderate of him to act that way out there, but I think you were just reliving something you shouldn't have to. The games can make anyone do bad things."

"Maybe..." You mutter, second-guessing yourself now. You didn't even see his eyes tonight, not until he was looking at you and begging you to listen when you couldn't. He looked just as scared as you, as soon as he realized what he had done.

"Are you sure you saw that today?" Lucy Gray's question shocks you, but it's exactly what you were thinking. "His eyes, I mean. Did you see it again or did you just expect to after last time?"

You jump at the rapid knocking on the back door. Lucy Gray stands up, making her way over to it. You hear muffled voices for a few moments before Lucy Gray returns. "It's your family, I'm going to let them in, okay?" She pats your leg and you nod, and she smiles at you reassuringly before walking away.

You hear the door creak open and you stand up, brushing off the front of your dress and turning to face them as your father and Lennox rush in.

"Honey, are you okay?" Your father asks, quickly gathering you into a hug and you nod, biting back more tears.

"Fine just fine." You whisper. "I'm sorry you had to come all this way..."

Lucy Gray catches a glimpse of Sejanus and Coryo standing outside as she lets your family in, looking back at them talking to you when she slips out. She gently closes the door behind herself and walks up to them. "I thought I told you to go home."

"I know, I know, but-" Coryo looks between her and the door. He sighs, deciding to give up on defending himself. "Is she okay?"

Lucy Gray looks at him, arms crossed over her chest as his hair falls in his eyes and he doesn't immediately fix it, more concerned about you than anything else. "You need to cut your hair." She states plainly.

He's confused, opening his mouth to argue when she speaks again. "You need to cut your hair so she can see your eyes. She'll feel safer with you then." She turns on her heel, nodding to Sejanus before heading back for the door. "When we get her out of there you better be gone- she can't see either of you tonight." She pauses, hand on the handle. "But yes, she'll be okay."

taglist: @soulessjourney , @that-veela-girl ,  @dreamyysouls, @rockstarbfs , @maysileeewrites , @baybieruth , @kitscutie ,  @fratboyharrysgf0201 , @totallynotkaibiased , @stelleduarte , @secretsicanthideanymore , @bejeweledreverie , @drewsandsebastianswife , @niicole-87 , @queenofshinigamis , @innercreationflower , @nallasstuff , @scorpiolystoned , @iovemoonyy , @thatmarvelchick19 , @wearemadeofstardust0 , @regulusblackcore , @puredreamagination , @fantasticchaosthing , @becauseseaotters , @secretsicanthideanymore

okay suddenly tumblr isn't letting me tag more people than this so i just made some cuts unfortunately :') i just left the max amount of people i could whose users i recognized and see in my notifs all the time :) if you're not on here and you should be i'm so sorry!

also this taglist is closed now!! if you’d like to get a notification when i update, turn on my post notifications!! i promise i won’t spam y'all :,)

[hexonthepeach]

dive

pairing: f4!nct dojaejung x fem!reader (past johnny x reader mentions)

genre: hana yori dango/boys over flowers/meteor garden/f4 thailand reverse harem au (mild allusions and characterization only)

warnings: brief mentions of past bullying, dom!doyoung, hopelessromantic!jaehyun, mommykink!jungwoo, reader is a bit of a switch, smut (mmmf, double penetration, oral f & m receiving/giving, unprotected sex, anal, semi-public sex), degradation/humiliation kink (reader), pet names: baby, mommy (reader), puppy (jw)

wordcount: 10k

author's note: i wrote this as a distraction from other projects after listening to perfume on repeat and lamenting the end of promo. intended as a oneshot but i have some ideas for continuation. please let me know if you enjoy it (and more importantly, what you enjoy)

The Bangkok night is warm and thick and redolent with flowers. The expensive vacation home one of your three companions had arranged for your short stay is quietly luxurious, separated from the city bustle but still hazed with light past the high walls and thick foliage surrounding the pool. 

You'd never made a habit of asking who paid for what with your travel companions, but you guess by the mix of old world and new that it was Jaehyun's idea to stay here–perhaps even a Jeong family permanent accommodation. His family's import business had done well in the region, judging by the luxury sports cars parked in the driveway.

Everything about this trip is surreal–worse for the fact that a fourth presence lingers like a ghost in your periphery. 

He should have been here. Indeed, you've taken his place, filling the natural void like a small drop in an ocean-sized hole. 

Everything about this distraction brought you back to him: the rose petals strewn across your pristine bed, the snarling garuda statue lurking across the aquamarine oasis. 

Johnny is 8600 miles away and still very near. 

Jaehyun joins you at the pool's edge, slipping some well-concocted drink near your manicured fingers–most likely Jungwoo's contribution by the tasteful sprig of flowering basil. You'd refused multiple drinks at the club, still flagged from a day of travel and self-conscious of the eyes on your table and you’d finally agreed to one now that you were back safe in your own private enclosure.

He shucks off his sandals to dip his feet in beside yours, nudging you beneath the water to remind you that even with the grief that's hollowed you out inside, you're not alone.

Jaehyun doesn't speak–well accustomed to your need for silence when you've inevitably descended into that space again. 

Unfortunately, Doyoung isn't as accommodating. 

"What did we say about moping, Y/N?" A tall shadow stands beside you, swaying slightly. 

"I'm not moping," you say, sipping from your glass of Mekhong soothed with sugar and soda. "Just thinking."

"Wasn't the point of this vacation to get you to stop doing that?" Doyoung is touching his toe to the warm water when there's a sudden rush from behind you, a startled cry escaping the man before he hits the surface fully clothed. 

"Was he bothering you?" Jungwoo asks, looking completely unfazed about shoving the other man in.

"You bastard," Doyoung says, spluttering up and tossing his hair back as he holds his phone out of the water.

"It's waterproof."

"That's not–"

"I'll buy you a new one." 

"Now you're going to have him trying to return the favor," you say, giving him a sly smile.

"Oh I think I'll be alright," he says with a wink, backing up a few paces before cannon-balling in. If you'd been doused by Doyoung's ungraceful landing you're soaked thoroughly by the splash Jungwoo makes, finding yourself shielded by Jaehyun's torso wrapped around you. 

You hadn’t even thought to protect anything but your drink, your heart stuttering as you find yourself inches from his flushed face and rosy lips.

"You okay?" he asks, wiping water from your face with his silk sleeve. 

"Yeah," you say quietly. "Can't see the tears now, right?"

He blinks at you, believing you by the clouded expression in his dark eyes.

"I'm just kidding. Not crying, see." You smile at him as best as you can muster, hoping your carefully-applied makeup isn't running off your face. 

"Don't you want to join us?" Jungwoo has escaped Doyoung by pressing himself to your knees, shoulders well out of the water at standing level. You shake your head, suddenly shy.

"You should have let those girls come back with us," you say. "All that work wingmanning for nothing."

"Blame Doyoung for boring them talking about tariffs," Jungwoo says, ducking as the other shoves water in his direction. "Besides, we didn't want you to be alone."

"You know I don't mind, puppy." You tousle his wet hair, sipping deeply again. Through the fogged rim of your glass you catch his cheerful expression falter. It lasts only as long as he realizes Doyoung is floating on his back, swamping him with a tackle.

"I asked them to keep it just us for tonight." Jaehyun says, breaking his quiet. 

"Saving the party for Phuket!" Jungwoo shouts in the background, mispronouncing the first syllable deliberately to sound like fuck it.

"Have someone you're missing tonight, too?" Your tease lands with a thud, watching your best friend's mouth crease at the corner as he chews his lip. 

"I'm sorry, that was rude–"

"No," he says. "I know how you feel."

"How far away is Paris?" you ask, not expecting an answer.

"5 hours," Jaehyun says, grinning slightly. It's a callback to so many months of watching him stare out towards the airport from the school rooftop with you, letting you listen while he mused on what she might be doing at that hour, how long it would take to get there. 

You'd encouraged him even as your heart broke–feeling the dwindling embers of a schoolgirl crush on him turn to ash. You would never be as good as his childhood love, even if you had taken up her place as his companion seated beside him on the piano bench when he practiced, or studying beside him as he drifted off into one of his many naps.

It was better this way–more comfortable just being able to be with him without the worry that you could live up to her, your heroine in highschool. But there would always be something there.

Doyoung clambers out to sit beside you, far enough away not to dampen the fuschia Versace metal mesh minidress he'd gifted you earlier. It was the perfect costume to play the part of nouveau riche jetsetter for a girl who lived one step up from a basement apartment. 

No one would mistake you for class, or even an influencer, but in their company no one was looking at you anyway. Most people thought you were Doyoung’s assistant or Jungwoo’s sister. The nasty looks, sometimes worse, always followed when they introduced you as their friend.  

"What can we do to make this a magical night?" Doyoung asks. You find yourself unable to answer, eyes caught on the smooth definition of his chest through the barely buttoned translucent shirt he'd worn out. You note he's lost the matching loose tie, probably still wrapped around a girl's neck on the dance floor.

"It's already so nice," you say, looking up at the blink of stars through the light pollution. "Thank you for including me." 

"You think we'd leave you behind?" 

The way he says you carries all sorts of strange subtext, considering your history. It had been a long journey from being mercilessly bullied and shoved into the dirt you came from, as Johnny had called it, to here. The lap of luxury, attended to by three specimens of wealth and privilege so out of your league you may as well be batting a thousand.

"Well it’s not like I got you in the divorce," you say, knot twisting in your chest. "I guess even now it’s hard to tell if you’re just being nice to me because you feel bad for me."

"First of all, he left all of us," Doyoung corrects. His voice is a little raspy, as if he's controlling his emotions. The admission leaves you questioning. You knew how close they were but they'd never shown any sign of being affected by Johnny's sudden departure.

Maybe you'd just been too busy wallowing to notice. 

“Second, you’re special. Too special to let just anyone play with. If you hadn’t noticed, we enjoy your company.”

"And when have we ever done something nice?" Jungwoo rests his arms on your knees, almost pulling you into the water. Jaehyun pushes him back with his foot, earning a tug on his leg that does little to move his immovable weight. 

"You're a package deal, though. Like a blend," you raise your mostly empty glass to drive your horrible attempt at a metaphor to death. “Even with one ingredient missing you can’t beat the original.”

“Well I won’t deny you're a strange substitute,” Doyoung says, gracefully using your words to make his point. It reminds you of how he’d spent hours drilling you with details of tea ceremony when your ridiculous coworker had asked for a demonstration of his family’s heritage business. 

“But taste requires innovation, and it’s often the unexpected addition that changes the entire flavor profile. You’re new but you’re refreshing, and unique. Not something to be discarded because anyone demands it.”

“That’s a very poetic way of saying you still like me even if I’m an uncultured pain in the ass.”

"Poor little weed," Jungwoo says, hands splaying over your bare thighs before Jaehyun can foist him off again. “Are you insulting Doyoung’s taste? You're the first girl any of us have agreed on."

"I doubt that considering what I saw last Friday. Did all of you sleep in Doyoung's room or did you take turns–"

You catch Jungwoo's scheming look with Jaehyun right before the cocktail glass is plucked from your hand and you're picked up on both sides, Jaehyun lifting you by the waist and Jungwoo taking over once you're free of the edge.

"Let me go," you shriek, folding over his shoulder. 

"Are you sure?" Jungwoo bends his knees until your hem is submerged, not phased as you beat on his back with soft hits.

"At least toss me in so you can get a head start," you threaten. He indulges you, lifting you up out of the water like he's going to help you recreate that pivotal scene from Dirty Dancing only to throw you back and into the deep end. 

You hold yourself in a ball and sink, breath held, channeling your best hello darkness my old friend as you wait for the inevitable. It takes less than ten seconds before Jaehyun dives in after you, pulling you up.

“Got you,” you say, grinning through the trickles of warm water. Jaehyun looks less than amused, lips thinning into a tight line as water drips from his bleached blond hair.

"Don't scare us like that," Doyoung gripes, joining you a few seconds too late. You shoot him and Jungwoo a look over your perch on Jaehyun's arm, clinging to him for comfort.

“Yeah, please.” Jaehyun breathes. 

"Is my makeup coming off?" you ask. He's been staring at you funnily as you float beside him, bodies brushed up in the expansion of his clothing and the occasional contact with his frame.

"What?" Your best friend sounds dazed, water collecting in his dimples as he smiles softly.

"What?" You parrot, teasing, mirroring him in the way your eyes dart to his mouth, not surprised to find his lip trembling. His uplit face is shadowed with hidden feelings you can only guess at. 

That years-old urge to kiss him returns. It could be considered revenge for back when he'd grabbed you and given you a taste of what it would be like that day after he’d come back from his trip abroad. You'd melted into him like it was the most natural thing in the world, the illusion only broken when Johnny had slammed the rooftop door shut on the way back down, flowers for whatever apology he'd half-assed scattered across the dirty tar paper.

You'd slapped him afterwards, surprised to find him smiling. He's in love with you, isn't he? Had to be sure.

There'd been so many times after that he'd played with your feelings you'd lost count, but one constant remained: he would never pursue you fully if he believed it would hurt his best friend.

Your chest feels tight just imagining what might have been, had you changed course back then. But you've long given up dwelling on might have beens.

Jaehyun is less mercurial now that he's older so you’re the one to catch him by surprise, lips pressing to his cheek right beside his mouth–in the smile lines you know too well. It's a quick send-off before Jungwoo can grab his legs and pull him under from below. 

Doyoung takes the opportunity to capture you by the waist, keeping you from becoming a casualty of their underwater fight. He looks just as serious as always, even without his usual glasses.

"Sorry about the dress," you say, working to stay afloat.

He laughs at you, prone to condescension as always. "If you like it we can get you another. But do you really want to wear the same thing twice?"

"Some of us can't replace our wardrobe every week," you huff. 

"Are you under the impression I'm replacing a bespoke suit collection every week? All I'm saying is you should have a new dress for every occasion. Especially if you're with us."

You jab him in the side, surprised at the hardness of his ribs but also delighted by his startled wheeze. 

"I'm not your kept woman."

"Not even if we want to keep you to ourselves?" 

A little shiver runs through you, making eye contact with him as he mouths the waterline. It's said so innocently but you know better. He and Woo had been dropping double entendres since well before takeoff from Seoul.

Flirting was Jungwoo's thing, a silver lining to the dark shadow of a personality that enjoyed being subtly in control. As the future heir to a crime syndicate it was much better than experiencing his hidden anger. Doyoung though . . . as much as he dabbled in shadier scenes and pretended to be a womanizer he's old-old-old money, from a strata inaccessible to anyone who's genealogy can't be traced back to the Goryeo dynasty. 

The idea of him folding you into his life, much less keeping you, is absurd.

“Well that does seem to go against the whole idea of this being a trip to finally get over . . . everything,” you say, deflecting from his intensity. “What happened to letting me live like the F4 for one week?”

“Is this not it?” He quirks an eyebrow at you. 

“What if I want you to play wingman for me? Find me something meaningless to distract me?”

You're not expecting the dark storm that settles over his refined features.

“I think you have enough distractions here to keep you occupied.”

Your pulse picks up, hearing the hidden message loud and clear. He'd heard your laments to Jungwoo about how long it had been since you even thought about being with someone else, how you'd never really gotten to date after three brutal years of school, work, and accidentally making the worst chaebol tyrant in Seoul fall for you. 

Now that you're free for the first time in your adult life, you want to experience what it's like to be just another girl, like the ones they so frequently invited to their tables at function and club alike.

"Are you insinuating you're not going to let me bring anyone back if I find a fling? After I just spent all night singing your praises to a healthy pool of candidates? Double standard, much?"

Doyoung wraps an arm around you to keep your head from knocking against the tiled pool edge. He's backed you into it without you even noticing it. 

"You can try," he says, gripping the wall next to your cheek. "Though I would question the sanity and intelligence of anyone who took you up on it." 

There's his brand of cruelty: casual threats delivered without a hint of remorse. You'd been on the receiving end, perhaps were now, but you're not afraid of him in the slightest.

"You're not reporting all of this to him, are you?" 

Doyoung doesn't answer, nostrils flaring. 

"Or is he only texting 'Woo back?" you ask. 

"Who texted me?" Jungwoo asks with open curiosity behind him. 

Doyoung presses a single finger to your lips in warning, releasing you. 

"Didn't you get the number of that model? Miss Thailand 2016 runner-up?" You toss your head slightly to clear it, still feeling heat suffuse your cheeks from just a touch against your mouth. It really had been too long. 

"Oh she's too good for me," Jungwoo remarks, jokingly. "Besides, I already have a failed beauty queen right here." 

You snort. “In what world is second place a failure when it’s your first time?”

The contest had just been a university charity project but you'd worked hard to earn that spot after Johnny had entered you in as some kind of sick game from abroad. Jungwoo had helped you conquer it–had even got you a side gig modeling when his usual partner had dropped out at the last minute at one of his shoots. You’d just been there to deliver coffee and now you were on a cover being printed in 15 different countries. 

You always liked reminding Jungwoo of his Pygmalion moment because that's when you'd genuinely seen his kinder side–even if you suspected he may have threatened at least two of the judges to land you on the final stage. Losing had been worth it to spend time with the member of the F4 you’d never been close to in high school. 

"Maybe she doesn't deserve you," you say, swimming around him to grab him loosely around the shoulders. “Not many can appreciate having a personal rescue dog to save them from getting wrinkly fingers.”

You're immediately indulged, Jungwoo paddling you back to the shallow end where Jaehyun is lost in thought, staring at white blossoms from one of the trees in the courtyard floating in front of him. Doyoung is just as contemplative. 

It’s probably best to not let it stretch out any longer–you were always a fan of ripping the bandage off quickly even if it hurt. 

"I'm going to go take a shower and call it a night." You announce, hearing Jungwoo groan. "Unless . . ."

"Unless what?" Jungwoo perks. Jaehyun squints up at you where you stand over him. You look at Doyoung instead, as he drags himself out of the water to sit on the ledge beside the stairs.

"Unless you tell me what we really are."

The buzz of cicadas seems to die a little, soft music inside the house drifting out through the glass. 

"Friends, hopefully?" Jungwoo says.

"Well you aren't bullying me anymore, so yes. But friends don't keep their friends from moving on from past relationships."

"That's not at all—" Doyoung begins.

"Let me finish," you interrupt. He's immediately quiet, throat bobbing as he looks beside you at Jaehyun's taut shoulders.

"I'll never fit in with you or your world but we both stopped judging each other for that a long time ago, I think. I like spending time with you, I like knowing you'll still include me even if . . . " You can't bring yourself to say Johnny's name. "Even if I'm just another ghost who's outstayed her welcome."

It was their term for dropped flings and casual encounters, with a whole subset of terminology for the ones who couldn't get the hint (poltergeist), or lost their cool at their dismissal by screaming and crying (banshees). 

It hadn't been like that for you even the second or fifth time Johnny had broken up with you–always for reasons out of your control. You'd shown him the same aggression and cruelty in answer, but you’d never begged for him to take you back, ever, and you certainly had never sought out his friends. 

It had always been their prerogative to spend time with you, and you’d leaned into it your freshman year of university study and singlehood, wanting the support network denied you by being alone and poor in a city you could barely afford. You’d never take their money but you had accepted their company, and had enjoyed it far more than you could have imagined. 

Even if it kept you in Johnny Suh’s outer orbit, what you had with them meant something to you. You didn’t want to lose it when he came back. From the press releases about his recent promotion, it would seem to be soon.

Waiting for that inevitability is like attending your own funeral before you’re dead, pallbearers for company. 

"You're not a ghost," Jaehyun says. "And we won't abandon you, ever."

"You'll just keep me and this dynamic trapped in amber until Johnny changes his mind, then? It's been a year already. I don't want to lose any more of my youth to him, and I don't want to lose you when he comes back and you all act like he's done nothing wrong."

"That won't happen," Doyoung says, sighing. 

"No, because I'll leave before then." You get out of the water, brushing your face free of the hot tears. "Wouldn't want to ruin your fun."

Jaehyun pulls you back, strong enough you lose your footing and sink into his submerged lap. 

"You're not going anywhere," he says. There's no malice or anger in his tone, just quiet assurance. He cleans your face again, blue silk cuff coming away black with mascara. 

"You asked what we are. Remember when you used to come sit next to me under that stupid ad?" 

"Yeah?" you sniff. You'd spent hours with him sitting on a city bench as he stared up at a billboard for luxury clothing with her face on it. She’d been the dream he chased at your urging, the fantasy that had sadly broken with proximity.

"When I was in France, after things became clear, I would go and sit somewhere and pretend like you were there with me."

"I hope it was somewhere fun, like the Louvre," you joke. 

"Too crowded." He shakes his head, smirking. "Would look weird talking to myself."

"Oh you talked to invisible me but you couldn't pick up the phone once?"

He shakes his head again, squeezing you. 

"Anyway. The point is you're stuck with me. And them."

"And Johnny . . .?" 

"Stop bringing up our ex," Doyoung says. Not your ex, our ex. 

"It's a valid concern," you say, adjusting in Jaehyun's hold to rest your head against his damp shoulder. "I'm not going back to him. And I know you'll choose him over anyone else."

"No," Jaehyun says. 

"You're the exception." 

You lift your head to blink up at Doyoung.

"Didn't think you made those."

"Well you just haven't spent enough time with me, then."

"You planning on spending time with me?" You smile lazily, hand drifting to squeeze his leg. It's always fun to see his unflappable face twitch.

"He already blocked off half his itinerary for private tours. Jaehyun had to fight him to split it equally," Jungwoo says. Doyoung splashes water into his face with his foot.

"I wanted it to be a surprise," he says sourly. 

"Like the massage tomorrow morning?" 

This time Doyoung's kick makes waves wash over you and Jaehyun, leaving you spluttering.

Jungwoo takes it, smiling once his floppy brown hair is pushed back out of his eyes again. He grins at you from the water. "You'll take your dog for a walk when you remember I exist, right?" 

"Why not just come with us?" You'd often wondered if there was an invisible tether for how often they appeared together.

Doyoung clears his throat, Jaehyun shifting uncomfortably under you. 

"What am I missing?" You laugh awkwardly, looking between them. 

"I forget the only man you've ever dated never dated anyone seriously, either." Doyoung looks somewhat pleased with himself. "Traditionally when you spend time with someone you're interested in you don't have company–"

Shock runs through you like ice dumped over your head. "You can't be serious."

Doyoung's face is incredibly serious, Jaehyun's proving only a little more relaxed about the disclosure. You turn around to Jungwoo, floating nearby with a humored expression. 

"You're not part of this are you, 'Woo?"

"Of course I am. You deserve a break from stuffy museums and romantic dinners to have some real fun."

His eyebrows lower a bit in some sinister joke, and for the first time a little fear courses through you. It's been a long time since you saw their manipulative and controlling side, but bringing you to a foreign country to date you, their best friend’s ex, without telling you . . . That's a whole new level of it.

"This isn't a competition, is it?" You hide the tremor in your voice. 

"Between us? Of course it is," Jungwoo says.

"And the terms?" You look at Jaehyun, who is unable to meet your gaze. "Let me guess, whoever fucks me first?" 

His eyes widen in genuine dismay, panicking. "No, of course not–we just wanted to give you a chance to decide if . . ."

"If what?" 

"If you liked one of us more than the others," Doyoung finishes for him. 

You find yourself breathing heavily, face flushed. 

"What if I can't choose?" You ask, gaze fixing on Jaehyun's mouth as he bites his lip, still looking guilty. 

"If you decide you don't want to be with any of us, then things stay the same. Nothing changes. We'll still be friends." He says it all slowly, deliberately, almost as if it’s rehearsed.

"And if I choose one of you? Do I get to suffer the jealousy complex of another deeply insecure and emotionally unavailable man?"

That hits them where it counts. They'd all watched Johnny take out his fears on you, masked under bravado, posturing for an audience that more often than not was just you and his friends. His peers had rarely done the same, unless you counted Jungwoo following his enforcement orders like a loyal hound or Doyoung orchestrating clean-ups. 

No, they'd skated clean through multiple horrorshows by simply being there to throw their weight. No one else had the notoriety and resources to cover up the trail of damage left in Suh's wake.

You stand up again, turning between them. "And none of you are worried about Johnny finding out?"

A lump forms in your throat, bitterness about even having to invoke your own personal demon. Yes he'd walked away, but you knew his sense of entitlement would never allow his interests to be compromised by another–especially his closest companions.

And here they are, looking between each other and discussing your fate with the deliberate calm of a business transaction.

Apparently the only consequences were for you.

"Or is that the real game you're playing here," you ask. "Degrade me so far in his eyes he'll want nothing to do with me while you write me off as disloyal trash."

Jaehyun sucks his breath in through his teeth, and you note how hurt he looks. Jungwoo seems even more upset, full bottom lip jutting out.

"I know what you've been through, and I know it will be a long time to forget," Doyoung says. "But we're not him."

You remember an old saying your father had taught you: when you're holding a hammer everything looks like a nail. Better applied to problem-solving perhaps, but you'd also been dealing with one, giant nail-shaped problem since he'd crashed into your life. It was stuck in your heart and time and healing hadn't removed it. Maybe it was permanent, but you still had to live with it. 

"I just don't understand how you think you think this will work."

"You're awfully concerned about what he thinks," Jungwoo says, rising over you. "What about moving on?" 

"I don't give a fuck what he thinks. I'm just looking out for you. You know he'll punch first and ask questions later. What if he does something reckless?"

Jungwoo is laughing at you through closed lips, eyes crescented in mirth. "We have you to protect us, right? Just roundhouse kick him in the face again."

“That was lucky,” you say. “He wasn’t trying to murder me, either. There’s probably an American hitman on his way right now to take us all out and make it look like an accident.” 

“He would definitely hire locally,” Jungwoo corrects you. 

“And here I thought you were braver than that,” Doyoung muses. “Do you think we need his permission? You certainly don't.”

That makes you pause. You look at Jaehyun. Of all the people in the world he was the closest to their former leader. They’d fought even more than he and you had, and Jaehyun had always conceded, taking it on the chin, letting Johnny drag him along in his wake. The one time he'd stood up to him had been for you and it had almost fractured everything irreparably.

His black eyes pierce into you when he looks up. 

“I think y/n can make any decision she wants to,” he says dangerously. “None of us will stand in your way, whatever you choose.” 

“You promise?” you ask, tilting your head to let your wet hair brush over your bare shoulder. 

“Cross my heart and hope to die,” Jungwoo says. 

You wait for the others to show visual signs of concession: Jaehyun nodding, Doyoung making the sign of the cross in what is an obvious misuse of the gesture. 

“Good. Because if Johnny finds out what I’m doing on this trip, he’s not the only one who will kill you.”

"I think we should start enacting a punishment whenever she brings him up again," Doyoung says.

"Great idea," Jungwoo says, sweeping you into his wet hold from behind. The chill you'd been feeling exposed to the air dissipates a little, his warm chest against your bare shoulders. You shiver a little at the intimacy, feeling him laugh even if he doesn’t make a sound.

“What will it be?” Doyoung defers to Jaehyun.

He leans back . “She does something to distract herself.”

You purse your lips together, affecting an air of deep thought. "My choice?"

"Always," he says, not breaking eye contact. 

"Rock, paper, scissors, then." You nod at him. He grins, Doyoung groans. Jungwoo's long arms wrap around your waist, hands already in position. 

"Surely there's a better way we could eliminate your options," Doyoung says, almost missing the cue and throwing paper to the other two's scissors. 

"Better luck next time," you tease.

"Kiss it for luck." The back of Jungwoo's hand presses to your mouth moments before Jaehyun initiates. 

Jungwoo loses the second quick round after a draw, crushed by Jaehyun's rock. 

"I should have known you were cursed." Jungwoo pouts, not letting you free until you've ducked back into the water to escape him. You give him a wink as you swim towards the stairs, emerging between Jaehyun's spread legs before he can close them. 

"What are you doing?" he asks, warily, still leaned back against the last stair.

"What I want," you say, blinking drops from your lashes. You move weightlessly on to his thighs, grabbing his soft face in your hands. He's unable to process what's happening quickly enough to respond as you tilt his face up and press a gentle kiss to his parted mouth. 

You ignore Jungwoo's wolf-whistle in the background, partially aware Doyoung has shifted nearby the moment you'd slid into your friend's lap. All that is noise as the gentle sound of the water feature drowns the startled sound you make when you're grabbed and pulled back to Jaehyun's mouth. 

This time it's real: solid and delicious as he crushes against you, tongue sliding across the seam of your lips until you let go of your held breath to softly exhale into his. Small dips of his chin coax you into opening for him, your hands threading into his hair to anticipate his movements as he kisses you like it's the last time in his life he'll ever get the chance. 

"That's enough," Doyoung says, Jungwoo booing him. 

The other two may as well not exist, your thumbs circling Jaehyun's cheekbones as you retreat to inspect the damage. He's usually so composed it feels like peering into a different universe's version of him, rapture and satisfaction warring with concern in his expression. 

"Thank you," you whisper. His eyes focus again, teeth exposed as he tongues them. 

"Any time," he says. It's funny how instantly he regrets the word choice, the pink in his ears and cheeks deepening.

"Not thinking about you-know-who now, are you?" Jungwoo asks, right behind you. 

"No," you say. "But I suspect you wish I'd say yes if only for the consequences."

"That was hot," he admits. "But I don't typically like my prospects thinking about other men." 

"Can I tell you a secret?" You crook your finger, clutching on to Jungwoo's wet patterned shirt when he leans down far enough to be in range. 

"I only made you play for it so we could find out who goes first." You say it in his ear, letting your mouth drag against the shell.

He pulls back, hesitant, nose brushing against your cheek. 

"Really?" 

"Kiss me and find out," you offer. 

He doesn't wait, lashes against his cheeks as he meets you halfway, tilting your head to the side for full exploration of your lips. He's much gentler than you expected, shy almost, tender even when your tongue meets his and you can taste the hint of sticky mango rice you'd had for dessert earlier. 

"Good boy," you say once you've broken free. He smiles in the way you're used to the most, right side of his face crooking with an edge of deviousness.

You turn to find Jaehyun watching, eyes starry with arousal but unreadable. Doyoung is on his feet as if he's preparing his exit, expression stony. 

"Is something wrong?" you ask, meeting his calculating stare.

Doyoung opens and shuts his mouth, water pooling at his feet. 

"Not enough punishment for you?" There's an edge to your voice that you recognize as the tone you'd used many times before, in your idiotic quest to tame one of his own. 

The tension breaks when Doyoung laughs softly, crouching down and crooking his finger. You wade up the steps to meet him, hyper aware of the drag of eyes on you as you emerge from the water, dress clinging to your skin. 

"I planned out such a nice trip for you, and this is what you really want?" Doyoung asks, eyes traveling down your body and back to your face in the kind of assessment that you'd seen other people wither under. 

"Why do you think I agreed to come?"

“Noted.”

He nods, slightly, but makes no move to take what you'd already given the others. You don't let it dissuade you, fingers digging into the hard line of his shoulders to press your lips to his. 

It's like kissing a statue. A challenge you're willing to meet as you delve further, rocking him back on his heels. You pry open his mouth with gentle bites and licks between each kiss, past his perfect teeth until you can explore his tongue with your own. You don't realize your hands are fisted in his wet hair until you're done, finding him collapsed on the wet cement, panting. 

"Was that sufficient punishment?" you ask.

"For you? Absolutely not," Doyoung says, the rare full smile gracing his kiss-swollen mouth. "For them? Yes."

You glance back at your other two companions, clocking that they're both nearer than you remembered. Jaehyun's hand drifts over your hip, as if he's questioning letting you go in the first place. 

"Should we set some rules? Or are you all going to take them as an excuse to break them?"

Jungwoo chuckles. 

"No competition. Equal time, equal attention. And no possessiveness," you state. Doyoung looks up from under his brows with amusement, clearly enjoying your groundless attempt to set boundaries. 

"I don't care what you throw at me as long as you don't walk back what you said about our friendship."

"I think we're something different now," Jaehyun says, voice cracking.

"I know," you say. You run a hand over his head, feeling his temple come to rest against your waist. "But you crossed that line first. I'm just saving you the trouble of playing some silly game to come on to me. I'm not a prize to win. I'm a person who knows you all better than you think."

You turn to Doyoung again, holding your ground. "You said you'd give me the true F4 experience."

"Within reason," he demures. 

"Then lose your hangups and let me have a taste of what it's like to be just one of those girls you have no problem with having fun with. No special treatment, no regrets."

The stunned silence has you feeling a twinge of embarrassment at pushing your agenda this far.

"Impossible," Jungwoo answers. 

"Why not?"

He pulls the hair away from your neck to kiss beneath your ear. Gooseflesh appears on your arms even in the warm air, anticipating his answer, but he's too occupied with trailing his mouth down, sucking lightly over your pulse. You feel dizzy, hand reaching back to hold his head to you.

Once he's had enough of watching you unravel Doyoung jerks you forward, grip tight around your wrist.

It's a familiar gesture, a reminder you are at their mercy. He cuffs his hand around your neck like he's going in for another kiss, stopping at a few inches. 

"You don't get to set all the rules. This one especially. You are not just some girl with whom we engage in forgettable, inconsequential relations."

He pauses, eyes darting to your mouth before meeting yours again. "If we go down this path you're getting the real thing. All of it."

"We know you have experience." Jungwoo adds. 

Oh you knew. They fucked around but they were careful about it, always gentlemen, always above board. NDAs in some cases, mostly for Doyoung. You didn’t know all of their specific proclivities outside of Jungwoo exclusively chasing women a generation older but you suspected whatever they enjoyed was much less wholesome. 

Like Johnny's needs once he'd finally had you. He'd bent that way and much, much more. The difference was he'd never been as precious with you as they were with their little conquests.

If they didn't want the safety of a legal cushion it didn't mean they didn't need it–they just didn't think it would be a problem.

"I'm sure you've heard a lot of things about me," you say. A whisper of rage underlies the words, colored by so many rumors foisted on you well before you'd ever accepted their company–even more when they had. 

Whore. Cockslut. Used goods.

Johnny had always been a contradiction–surprisingly prudish about sex but quick to use the grossest allusions to it when pressed for details by his friends, liberal in his name calling. They'd known him since childhood–they didn't believe him, even if everyone else had taken his words as gospel. You'd had your revenge by proving just how true those words could be in private.

"We don't know anything you don't," Jaehyun says, quickly. 

"Still, I don't think you know what you're signing up for," you say. "If anyone is using anyone in this arrangement, it's going to be me. Or I'm out."

"You worried we can't show you a good time?" Jungwoo asks. It's a funny question with him pressed into your back like he'll push your head down into the water if you answer incorrectly.

"I'm worried you'll chicken out," you say, grabbing Doyoung's wrist to keep his fingers on you, covering them with yours to increase the tension. You'd always been strong.

Doyoung's expression is matched by his lingering hold on your throat, squeezing a little and making your eyes drift shut in pleasure.

"You always did seem to enjoy the humiliation a little more than our other targets. Can't say it wasn't an encouraging factor. You like it, don't you?"

He lets you go with a slight push, registering the way your eyes haze over with reflected lust.

"Yeah. Blame a few formative years of getting my signals crossed. Just part of the damage." There's no shame in your voice, another casualty of their efforts.

"You're not damaged," Jaehyun remarks.

"Not beyond repair," you agree, gaze burning into Doyoung's. His regard is a thousand times more revealing than a kiss, most especially the tic in his cheek every time Jungwoo decides to leave a mark with his tongue and teeth on your throat and you reward him with a moan.

"Should be fun seeing which one of us can push past your comfort zone, then," Jungwoo says, breath cooling the last bruise he's left on the back of your neck. "Find out if you have one."

"You're not dropping the competition?" 

Nervous anticipation gives you butterflies, different than the ones springing up being teased by the three of them. Not one of them accepted being outclassed.

"No." Jaehyun says it well before the others. His hands drop to your legs to hold you steady as Jungwoo continues his assault on your neck. "But equal opportunity. I think we can all agree on that."

"Don't worry, we'll play fair," Jungwoo says, biting your shoulder. You jerk in his grasp, vaguely aware of fingers at your hem. Doyoung continues to watch, tongue darting over his lips.

"I hope not," you say. "I won't."

It's all the permission your captors need.

Your breath stutters as Jaehyun's hand slides up your inner thigh, circling the wet skin absent-mindedly. You whine a little, teased by the first intimate touch you've had in months.

"You better stay quiet. We do have neighbors," Doyoung says, voice pitched low.

"Think you can shut me up?"

He takes the hint, sliding his legs back over the ledge, letting you finish unbuttoning his shirt to expose his creamy skin. You spread your fingers over his firm abdomen, flicking aside the sheer fabric. He's intoxicatingly sensitive, muscles tensing as you follow the path of water down his long waist.

"You sure you want to play this game?" Doyoung asks, hand resting on your shaking fingers as you struggle to unbutton his damp jeans.

You look down at Jaehyun, smiling at him when you find he's still enraptured by your upper thighs. You wait until he looks back up, head cocked for permission.

"You alright with sharing me, tonight?"

Miles are crossed, bridges are burned as he contemplates the ask, returning to his shy efforts at warming your naked skin, lifting your hem to dangerous territory.

"Wouldn't dare stand in your way."

Jaehyun's approval is the best thing you've seen in a long time, even more so when he adjusts to be eye level with your now exposed underwear, back pressed to Doyoung's leg. 

Jungwoo tugs at the strap of your dress playfully. 

"Can puppy wait his turn?" you ask, looking up at your other torturer. 

Jungwoo kisses you over your shoulder, messily, before casually breaking one of the thin straps of your dress where it's attached to the delicate gold cherub adornment. The night air pebbles your skin, exposed nipple hardening more as he trails a fingertip lazily around it.

"As long as you need." 

He angles you down a bit towards the other man, just as Jaehyun's mouth finds you through the thin fabric of your lingerie–hot and perfect. Your knees are already weak and you have to catch yourself on Doyoung's thighs as you're touched and kissed and licked, still partially submerged and torn between warm and warmer.

There's a bit of menace in Doyoung's face, watching you unzip and find his length. He adjusts a little when you tug down the elastic waistband of his underwear, his cock already mostly erect despite the water. He's not as big as Johnny but perfectly sized, long and veined as he hardens in your hand. 

You experiment with laves of your tongue against his flushed head, watching him for a reaction through your lashes.

"Sucking me off before I can even take you on a proper date." He tsks, the sound changing when you lower your head, tongue folding around his tip to devour him whole. 

"You look so good with my cock in your mouth," he says. "Wish I could take a picture–"

You cut him short by taking him deeper, feeling him press at the back of your mouth. It's been awhile since you tested your gag reflex.

Thankfully Jaehyun has compromised on watching you while pushing your underwear into your sticky folds, Jungwoo playing with your breasts in the most maddening way possible with soft flicks and tugs. 

Both of them are sending you skyrocketing to a level of joy yet unexperienced this lifetime, much less this year. You have to concentrate on Doyoung to keep from falling apart too quickly.

Jungwoo's long fingers help clear your hair from your face so you can breathe, giving them all a better view as you choke, letting drool slip from your mouth as you take it deep and hard. 

The noises coming from your throat are nowhere near as obscene as the sounds Doyoung makes, angled back and thrusting weakly with each moan. You always thought his voice was beautiful, scratchy and breathy, but hearing him say your name in between gasps has your entire body enflamed. 

"Fuck, you're good," Doyoung says quietly, angled back on his elbows. 

Jungwoo holds your damp hair back, wrapping it in his fist to help guide you more gently. You relax your throat and take it, tears leaking from your eyes. If touch had you vibrating before, the sensation of being debased in this way has you dripping, your arousal exposed by Jaehyun's fingers slipping your panties down to the water.

"She's soaked," he says, running a single finger through your folds. You answer with a groan, other hand in his hair to hold him back before he can dip in again.

Jungwoo tests you, too, giving you a few swipes to collect your slick. He brings his fingertips to your mouth when you finally take a breath, letting you clean them.

It's delightful how Doyoung is unraveling already, arched back, eyes glassy. He drinks in the sight of you sucking two of Jungwoo's fingers until your cheeks hollow.

"You think you can finish what you started?" you ask.

"I don't think I'll ever want it to end," he admits.

"How about coming on my tongue?" You ask, pumping him slowly. You chase the taste of yourself with kitten licks of the beads of white on his head, going lower to trace his veins. 

"Only if you want to swallow everyone tonight," Doyoung says. The offer is tempting. You hesitate long enough that he reads you like an open book, adding an edge of threat. "Or do you want to be stuffed like the little whore you are?"

The affectation has you seizing up in long-withheld gratification. Jungwoo grinds against your ass as Jaehyun ignores your hold to finally lick long paths up your inner thighs, chasing trails of slippery arousal and water to dive in, fingers spreading your legs wide.

It's impossible to find a retort, sinking back into Jungwoo's embrace as you're attacked from below.

"I think you should only fuck me if you can make me come," you counter. "And it's still Jaehyun's turn–"

Your words are punctuated by a cry, Jungwoo's hand clapped over your mouth as Jaehyun pumps into you with two fingers, hooking into your g-spot.

"Ooh," Jungwoo says over your head. "Guess you'll have to wait." 

Doyoung sighs, taking over with his hand when you're bodily dragged back, Jungwoo lifting your dress to take it off. 

"Leave it on," Doyoung says. "The ravaged look suits her." 

You shoot him a look, unable to maintain your expression when Jaehyun's mouth works likes he's devouring you in turn, teeth scraping as he explores every inch of you, teasing your clit with darts of his tongue. Jungwoo frees your mouth to let you breathe, babbled words of praise spilling from you in between small cries.

"So good, so right, god, fuck–fuck." You're inarticulate as Jaehyun pumps his fingers slowly, spreading you and pressing right below his languid tongueing. Jungwoo's attention returns to your sensitive breasts, gently twisting each bud between his fingertips. 

"Keep it down," Doyoung warns, but it's impossible. 

Electric tingles spread down to your toes, tipped against the smooth pool floor. You let yourself relax in Jungwoo's hold, curling over your lover's head. Jaehyun is incredibly careful with you even as you're brought deeper, water lapping at his collarbones as he holds you spread and licks you in broad swaths. 

"Need a hand?" Jungwoo asks, somehow catching Jaehyun's nod mid-effort. You're unmoored by the hand that slips in from behind, fingers curling into you shallowly, water lapping your immersed buttocks. Jaehyun gives up control but he's still also buried in you, drawing wetness out of you with each stroke of his fingers.

Jungwoo matches his speed, knuckle to knuckle, as Jaehyun moves up to apply pressure to your clit again. 

"You two can get her ready. I want her after she's been used," Jungwoo says. 

"Of course you do," Doyoung says, dropping back in the water, demanding your attention. You indulge him with your hand, pumping him loosely beneath the surface. It's hard to coordinate as Jungwoo's hand fucks you into the pressure of Jaehyun's grip tight on your upper thighs, each circle of his tongue on your clit making your vision shimmer. 

"She's so close. Bet we can make her squirt." 

"No," you say, automatically self-conscious. 

"Did you hear that? She thinks she has a choice." The heel of Jungwoo's palm smacks wetly against your ass as he finger-fucks you, already too much before Jaehyun seems to pull you towards him, pressing hard into your walls. It's unlike anything you've ever felt, completely at their mercy as Jaehyun applies suction to your clit to bring you to the brink. 

"Come for us," Doyoung says. He's pressed to your side, rutting against your waist while taking your mouth to keep the shriek building inside your throat muffled.

There's no controlling the powerful waves tearing through your core, your legs shaking and buckling as the orgasm begins and doesn't seem to end, torn from you between all three of them. A hot gush of liquid coats your thighs as you throb around their fingers, pleasure morphing into pain until you're begging for them to stop. 

Jaehyun is the first to let you go, rising to share your release with a crushing kiss that takes your breath away, Jungwoo's fingers still reaching deep inside you.

"Good girl," Jungwoo says. "Was that your first time?"

You nod, cheeks hot, forehead pressed to Jaehyun's. You cling to him, still not quite down to earth from your climax. 

"Thank you," Jaehyun says, laughing slightly. "Was that too intense?"

"No," you shake your head. "Just hold me, please."

"Forever," he says, lifting you to straddle his hips. He manages the stairs to collapse on the deck, wrapping you tight in his arms as you kiss him deeply, cleaning his face of your release with gentle swipes of your fingers.

"You sure you don't want to go inside?" he asks, when you begin to unwrap him from his shirt. 

"I need you so much," you say. "I can't wait another moment."

He grins, shyly, kissing you as you help him out of his undershirt to reveal his swimmer's frame, triangular torso buckling into visible abdominal muscles. He's breath-taking, even more beautiful when you help him out of his pants and underwear to find his thighs flexed beneath his hard cock, shorter but thicker and so perfectly full and ready for you to sink down on. 

He doesn't question taking you raw–brow furrowing in concentration as you adjust to his girth slowly.

"We'll do this without an audience soon," you whisper, hoping he can still hear you as he bottoms out in your heat and his eyes flutter shut. 

"Yeah," he says, breathily. He's not moving, soaking in the sensation of having you completely wrapped around him. "I couldn't wait, either. You feel just as perfect as I imagined."

"So good," you assure him, moving for him. The lingering effects of coming harder than you think you ever have in your life aren't stopping you from bearing down on him, taking him harder and deeper with his wide shoulders for leverage. 

"Fuck, baby," Jaehyun growls. "I'm not gonna last like this."

He takes control with a firm grasp on your waist, pumping up into you. Soon he's bouncing you mercilessly into his hips, laid back on his wet clothes.

You haven't forgotten about the other two men, not when Doyoung's kneeled behind you, straddling Jaehyun's legs to stroke himself against the swell of your ass. 

Jungwoo grabs your hand to wrap around his own exposed cock, letting you feel him before you can even take in the sight of him bobbing over your head. Your finger and thumb can barely connect around his shaft, length too much to fit half of it in your mouth before you know it will be in your throat. Now you understand why the screams you'd heard from his room always sounded on the borderline of pain. 

"Too much for you?" He asks, angling the velvety soft head to catch on your open lips. Jaehyun slows down his thrusts to let you ease into taking the other man, pumping Jungwoo's base as best as you can as you sloppily accept the suffocation.

"Must have had a lot of practice getting your throat fucked to take me so well," he says, angling your head to move past the back of your tongue. You can't answer so you squeeze his balls instead, applying just enough pressure with your nails to have him groaning in appreciation. 

You lose your rhythm when you feel spit drip down your back, Doyoung collecting your earlier release from your thighs and mixing it with his saliva to rub his fingers against your puckered hole.

"Are you gonna be a good girl for all of us?" he asks, pressing a digit into the ring of muscle, causing you to choke on the heavy weight in your mouth.  

Jungwoo pulls out, saliva trailing from your lips as he gives you a break to adjust. You press your forehead to the sheer tank separating you from his flat belly as you look over your shoulder.

"I can take it," you say, trying to relax. Doyoung inserts another slender finger, making you clench around him and Jaehyun until the other man is panting. 

"I didn't ask if you could take it. I asked if you were going to be good."

"Fuck me and find out," you taunt. He's not like the others–he denies you anything but the wedge of his fingers into your ass, adding a third to stretch you when you're not loose enough. 

Jaehyun fucks against the intrusion, holding out until you're closer as he twines his fingers with yours and watches you work Jungwoo's oversized cock in your mouth and hand. 

"Knew you were a little slut who wanted to have all her holes stuffed. One of us wasn't enough for you, you had to make us share. I'm the only one who gets to fuck this tight little ass, though."

Doyoung drops another gob of spit on the dimple at the base of your spine, letting it slide over the gape left when he slides out his fingers. You cry out at the first intrusion of his cock into your barely-lubed hole, fighting to stay on top of Jaehyun as he works in with shallow thrusts, inch by agonizing inch.

"Keep forcing me out," Doyoung says. "I'll just fuck you harder." 

As if to prove his point he grabs on to your ruined dress at the back, arching your spine for you and making you take him deeper. The burning pain blurs into delicious aching pleasure–you needed this more than you could have even imagined. Jaehyun grunts inarticulately, palming your breasts and squeezing them in time to the ecstatic shudders rolling through your body as you're filled. 

"Open up for me," Jungwoo says, cock back in your gaping mouth. You let him hold you by the hair to fuck into your mouth, spit and tears mixing to splash on your breasts. 

When they resume their individual efforts you feel yourself being pulled apart by sensation, only able to manage sharp breaths through your nose to keep from drowning as tears leak from your eyes and sobs rip from your throat. 

"No cumming until she creams herself on Jaehyun," Doyoung says, reaching around to press hard into your clit. It's a hard ask with how overstimulated you already are but you can feel your muscles tightening against your will. Doyoung and Jaehyun's uhhs and mms mix in your ears, Jungwoo softly praising you when your jaw relaxes to swallow him despite the rock of your body against the other two. 

"Fuck she's so tight," Jaehyun says. "I don't know if I can wait."

"Wait." Doyoung orders, picking up his pace. "She's close. Make sure she remembers to breathe."

Jungwoo groans, pulling out with a last slap of his head on your tongue, letting you lap at the precum leaking from him. "You two are useless." 

He kneels down beside you, wresting Doyoung's hand away from your sore folds and rubbing soft, tight circles around your nub. It's not the stimulation as much as his mouth on yours, kissing with as much care and intimacy as you'd felt before, that carries you to a peak again.

"Oh fuck," Jaehyun says, lifting you with a last upwards jerk of his hips and spilling inside you. The rush of warm heat is so good you chase it, overworked muscles unable to hold against the sensation and twitching powerfully around both of their cocks buried deep inside you. 

Just as quickly your knees give out, collapsing half on Jaehyun and Jungwoo. Doyoung's shallow movements turn violent as he no longer bothers to keep you locked on Jaehyun, thrusting a few more times into your throbbing heat before emptying himself and pulling out to rub the last few spurts onto your skin.

"Shh," Jungwoo says when you continue to whimper, sniffling from the tears sliding down your cheeks. "You're almost done."

You shake your head half-heartedly, clinging to his shirt. You're dizzy, adrenaline fading and leaving you boneless and blotted out.

"Please. Maybe just a breather?" you beg. "My legs . . ." 

Jaehyun lifts you, and you hiss at the raw pain of your abused knees, grit brushed away by someone else's hands.

"Poor baby." Doyoung says. "Should have done this in bed but you just couldn't wait."

"'S fine," you mumble, swimming in the glow of your last orgasm. "Bed sounds nice."

"Get a towel," Jungwoo says, and Jaehyun rushes to grab one for you. Instead of cleaning or drying you off Jungwoo carries you to the edge of the pool, slipping in and cramming the soft fabric under you as he lets your legs dangle over the edge and into the water.

"What are you doing, puppy?" You manage to ask, holding on to his neck.

"Don't worry. I'll be careful," he says, palming himself between your legs. "Someone want to keep her head up? I need her to watch." 

Jaehyun adjusts to embrace you from behind, spreading your limp legs so they can all see the steady leak of cum from your gaping holes. You hear the telltale click of a picture being taken, distantly aware Doyoung's phone is still–obviously–working.

"What . . . ?" You ask drowsily, acquiescencing to the pull of your dress over your head and off of you. You shiver deeply, warmed by the body heat of the man behind you as the other strips in front of you. 

"You're going to come for us one more time," Jungwoo says, rising out of the water to pump himself at your leaking core. "I'm not letting you go until I can wring every last drop out of you."

"Fuck," you protest, writhing as he pulls you almost off the hard deck and onto his ready length. Jaehyun holds you tight, arm under your breasts as Jungwoo slides into the mess of cum and slick between your thighs. 

"That's right, take it," Jungwoo says, pinning you against Jaehyun. "Breathe, baby." 

"Too much," you sob, finding he's not even fully sheathed when the familiar ache in your belly of being hit too deep whites out your brain. 

"You don't want your puppy?" Jungwoo can barely speak, ramming in deeper with each rock of his hips. "Don't want to be a good mommy and take all of me?" 

Jaehyun is already semi-hard against your back, and you catch Doyoung's approval before he replaces it with a feigned look of disgust, slipping into the water to watch you both. You can see his arm flex, jerking himself underwater, the other holding his phone up. 

"If we'd known you were such a whore we would have fucked you sooner. It looks like you'll need some more breaking in."

You cry out, stretched tight around the thicker root of Jungwoo's cock, letting him wrap your legs over his shoulders for maximum depth. Whatever pain you feel is so merged with the fullness and perfect hit of him against your walls that you don't mind it, you can't help but slip into a dreamy state of bliss. 

"You're doing so well," Jaehyun says into the hair at your temple. "Can't wait to treat you right. Make you come on my tongue again as many times as I can before the sun rises."

"No, no, no," you moan.

Jaehyun pinches your nipple to wake you up, Jungwoo gasping when you manage to clench around him. 

"You both got her pussy first. You should let me take her tonight. Keep her awake by fucking her as soon as she falls asleep." Doyoung threatens, pulling your leg aside to get the best angle of you being impaled and stretched fuller than you'd ever thought you could be. 

"No one's getting her if she doesn't come again," Jungwoo says. He meets your tear-filled gaze, eyes half-lidded. "Is that what you want? To fall asleep on my cock and let me warm you all night until you're ready to fuck me?"

"Please, come for me, puppy," you manage to bite out, touching yourself in earnest to try and fight back. "So big for me, fill me up."

He takes the bait–you're folded in half, legs bent to your chest as he drives in, balls slapping wetly against you. When you're pliant again he readjusts his strokes to press into your upper walls with each rotation of his hips, and for the first time in a long time you realize you're getting close on cock alone. 

Jaehyun seems to feel the change in you, grinding against your back as his hand holds your throat so you can't turn away. The pressure makes you practically feral, crying out for more. 

"Just like that, like that, please please please," you moan over the lap of the water.

"Feel you sucking me in," Jungwoo says, face flushed and sweaty over you, hair dripping water onto your curled belly. "Let go for me so I can come in you so deep you can taste it."

"Yes, yes, please." You buck with the sudden electric tingle of another climax, steady tempo leading you to softer spasms than before. It's fine if you can't tell where you're at or what you're feeling because Jungwoo can, one final snap of his hips dropping you into fucked out darkness. 

When you come to again you're wrapped around him in the pool, gasping at the sensation of his cock still slowly pumping the last of his release into you.

"Trust me," he says, hands under your backside, lowering you into water suspended between the night and the warmth below. 

Doyoung spreads a hand over your breasts, Jaehyun beside him to hold your neck like he's teaching you to float. You let your mouth fall open and your eyes clench shut, tasting pool water before one of them–Doyoung probably, by the sounds--releases thick, white stripes across your tongue. Jaehyun follows suit, cockhead nudging against the underside of your breast as he paints your torso with molten heat. 

"Fuck that was incredible," Jungwoo says, slipping out of you finally so you can sink into the water. You submerge as much as you can to lose the coat of stickiness, until Doyoung decides you're done, pulling you out and against his chest.

"That was . . . a lot," you admit, shaking against him. 

"You did so well." He soothes you with a hand on your head, clearing your hair from your face delicately to press a kiss to your forehead.  The gesture is so at odds with his recent persona that you can't resist burrowing into it, relaxing fully against his naked chest. "Not bad for an initiation."

"I'm one of you, now?" you murmur. 

"Always were," Jaehyun says. He doesn't dare take you from Doyoung but he does lean down to kiss you deeply, hand running broad circles over your spine.

"Just think of all those red cards as an invitation." Jungwoo jokes, sinking down to eye level to caress your cheek. 

You remember scraped knees and busted lips, cafeteria trays dumped on you by entire tables of jealous girls and sycophantic boys. Johnny humiliating you, ordering you to clean his shoe with his tongue when you'd taken the place of your weaker friend who'd spilled on it. 

But you also remember the small moments of acknowledgement–the way Jungwoo had lingered outside your work waiting to get off when you closed to walk you home at night, or how Doyoung had bought out the entire store when you'd used the shitty part-time job as an excuse to duck out of being his date to a formal dinner you had no business being at. 

And most of all, all those hours spent sitting beside Jaehyun in your rooftop retreat, silently appreciating the late afternoon sun turning the city brilliant as you shared one half of a wired headphone.

Maybe having your heart ripped out was worth it, if it meant having this.

"Which one of us do you want to take care of you tonight?" Doyoung asks. 

You smile into his cool skin, melting into the knowledge that you've earned a place very few had shared. You'll enjoy it as long as it can last.

"Play for it."

[heeseung-min]

[10:00]

"Oh, Sarah?"

You who were looking for your favourite snacks on the aisle turned to your right and looked at the person who called you with unfamiliar name.

"Are you talking to me?"

"Yes, of course! You are Sarah right?"

"I..I think you got wrong person. My name is Y/n not Sarah."

You said with an awkward smile. Though, that didn't stop the person to continue telling you about 'Sarah'.

"No no. You are Sarah. We have been looking you for years, Sarah."

"Again, miss. I'm sorry but I am not Sarah. I am Y/n. Plus, I don't even know you."

You started to get annoying when the lady didn't want to believe you and keep calling you Sarah. You took your phone to call your boyfriend until you felt someone was hugging you from behind.

"May I know what is your problem with my girlfriend?"

You automatically turned to look at Jungwon, your boyfriend. He was glaring at the woman in front of you. He looked at you for awhile before asking you okay or not.

"Let me tell you again. My girlfriend's name is Y/n not Sarah. You maybe mistaken her."

"Show me her shoulder then."

"What?!"

Both of you and Jungwon were shocked at her sudden request. The lady looked so confident to show that you guys are wrong.

"Sarah has a big scar on her right shoulder. It caused from an accident when she was a little. So, show me your shoulder. I will leave if I'm wrong."

You wanted to say something but gasped when Jungwon pulled your round collar to show your shoulder. The lady frowned when she didn't see the scar. The confident expression on her face gone just like that. Jungwon rolled his eyes when she became silent.

"Are you done? I told you that you have mistaken my girl. Now, please leave us before I call the police."

The woman left with disappointed sigh. Maybe she really mistook you for someone else. She apologized to both of you before leaving.

"That was such a hassle. Are you okay, baby?"

"Yeah, I'm good. Thankfully, you appeared."

"Are you done picking the snacks?"

"Yep. Let's go check out. I can't wait to go home."

Jungwon smiled and fixed back your clothes then kissed your lips for a second. You guys actually just bought a new home to live together. Both of you just finished arranging the furniture so he made a trip to supermarket for groceries.

"Do you need help for the store room?"

"No need, baby. I can do it by myself. Just prepare the food for us."

"Alright." You cheerfully said and started to prepare a meal. Jungwon on the other hand started to carry the boxes that needed to put in the store.

When he finally put all the boxes, he saw a paper on the floor. Looks like it fell from one of the boxes when he was arranging it. He took it and read the context.

"Ah, thank god I refused her help or not she will see this."

'A woman got kidnapped on her way back home, if you find her please contact us.'

That was the headline and a picture of you on the paper. It has been two years since Jungwon took you to come with him. He made sure to change your identity and even paid a doctor to remove your scar permanently. He had planned it perfectly.

"Jungwon! The food is ready."

Jungwon put a reminder for himself to burn the paper later. He can't let you know the past that has been hidden perfectly.

-

-

🤭🤭ngl i like this one eheheh hopefully u guys enjoy this too

Taglist: @stacey-stonem @duolingofanaccount @lamoons

[the-ace-with-spades]

Another unhinged buddie fic idea - amnesia Eddie at his best and dumbest

So Eddie gets hurt, hits his head, is unconscious for like two weeks and when he finally wakes up, he thinks it's 2018, he's almost finishing fire academy and his parents are still saying he should let them take Chris away permanently.

To say he panics is an understatement — his muscles are weak after the lack of stimuli but he still puts a fight with the nurse that's trying to take his blood pressure.

He keeps on asking about where he is and where is Chris, only gets a you're in Cedars Sinai MC in Los Angeles and doesn't take for answer anything that tells him to stay still or to be careful with the IV, until the nurse says, "Your partner is right outside, I'm sure he's arranged something for your son."

He freezes. "My partner? I don't have a partner. Who is taking care of my kid?"

The nurse's face changes and there are suddenly more and more questions about what he remembers last, what year he thinks is, and does he remember his partner's name. He tells her - he fell asleep in his bed, 2018, he doesn't have a partner because he's been separated from his wife for a few years now.

Apparently, the year is 2023, he was on a call with his fire crew and got hurt, his partner is definitely his partner because he's his power of attorney, next of kin, and has been taking care of his kid.

So the nurse leaves to talk to the doctor and his partner who is still outside, with said doctor.

(Eddie doesn't know that but the nurse was either absolutely sure this is what Buck is because there are assumptions and there are legal medical documents or she is sure this is the mythical firefighters' bond and they're just very close work partners - your pick. Either way, Eddie thinks she means romantic life partner.)

Meanwhile, Eddie goes through all stages of grief because his apparent partner he acquired in the past five years is a he and apparently such a sure thing he's in all of Eddie's medical documents.

A guy. What kind of a guy he would have to be for Eddie to choose him as his partner?

Then the nurse comes back with a very tall, very handsome guy built like a brick wall but also making a face that makes him look like an eager but sad golden retriever and—

Oh. That explains some stuff. If just looking at him makes Eddie feel like it, then he can't even phantom what being with him feels like.

The guy stops mid-room, not going for a hug like Eddie expected him to. "Heard you don't remember me."

And he sounds so sad that Eddie reaches his hand out and the guy — his partner — is instantly at his side, gripping his hand, and Eddie doesn't let him go until he gets the point and pulls a chair closer and sits with him.

"I don't. So a name would be nice."

"Buck. Well, Evan Buckley, but everyone calls me Buck."

And like, Eddie's never been big for pet names but even in this short moment Buck seems so bright he wants to call him mi sol. "I call you Buck?"

Buck chuckles. "Yeah, you call me Buck. Unless you're really serious, then you call me, you call me Evan."

"Evan," he tests out. "Sounds like you're in trouble."

And Buck smiles at him so softly Eddie is melting in that bed, warmth hitting him where he's still holding Buck's hand hostage and traveling up. "Not to me."

Bobby, who is apparently their captain — even though Eddie has a feeling like he's talking to his in-laws again the whole time he is there — brings Chris to the hospital and he's so big, already eleven, and so sassy with Eddie.

He's also very, very familiar with Buck, which calms him down - he talks about the funny sandwich cutters Buck's been using the whole time Eddie was in the hospital to cheer him up and tentatively admits how they slept in the same bed the first week because Chris had nightmares.

And even though his dad landed in the hospital — again, apparently? — Chris seems very, well, very well-adjusted to the situation at hand, even if Eddie can see he's being a bit clingy with both Eddie and Buck. Like the adults in his life are doing a good job at shielding him.

Buck is the one who has all the hard conversations with him, about Shanon, about his parents, about his abuela moving to Texas because of a whole pandemic, about the accident he had at work, and what will happen once he leaves the hospital.

It's really reassuring, that it's Buck telling him all that.

If he had any doubts about Buck being a very, very good and very, very close partner, all of it disappears when they go back home from the hospital.

His whole house has signs of Buck living their best lives in there — there are photos, cookbooks, cooking utensils Eddie doesn't even know the names of, Buck's clothes mixed in his wardrobe, cards from Chris for the both of them. It's very clear Buck is not only a big part of their life but also lives with them full-time, too.

He knows where everything in the kitchen is — "I have a system, Eddie" — and he knows where all Eddie's insurance paperwork is, knows the PINs to his phone, his cards and accounts, he knows all about Chris' medical needs. He knows how Eddie likes his coffee, how Chirs likes his toasts, which shaving cream Eddie likes, which toothbrush is Eddie's, which pair of shoes Eddie's only bought because they were on discount and never worn, which of Christopher's notebooks is the one for math.

He doesn't remember the past five years but he can't imagine not having Buck as his partner. Knowing he is there doesn't make him anxious like he thought it would — it makes him calm, settled.

So he's offended when the first night comes and Buck tries to bring spare blankets onto their couch. He wants him in their bed.

He gets that Buck is trying to give him space since Eddie doesn't really remember all the years they've been together, but that's a bit much. They're partners, and pretty solid ones at that, not just a new couple figuring stuff out, they must have slept together a million times.

So Eddie tells him to go off the couch and sleep in bed with him. It takes some convincing but eventually, Buck agrees. They lie down, Buck is being unnecessarily awkward, turning his back on Eddie in the dark. Eddie is not having this — turns towards him and spoons him, holding him in his arms. He's pretty sure Eddie getting hurt and forgetting five years is stressful on Buck, too, even if he doesn't show it. He deserves the comfort of his partner, even if said partner doesn't remember all of their life together.

It happens again the night after, and the night after that, until Buck stops tensing up whenever Eddie wraps his arms around him.

Because Eddie was unconscious for so long, he still needs PT, and Buck somehow manages to arrange that Eddie's and Chris' PT is at the same time and Buck oscillates between staying with either of them for the duration. There's one time when the receptionist at the therapy center asks him why he comes in so often when he looks fine — she's flirting with him, Eddie knows, which makes him glare at her, and Buck just tells her, "I'm just the chauffer for my boys." And Eddie calms down.

They assessed him at the hospital and he's supposed to have someone's handheld assistance or use a stick or a frame when he walks, until the PT gets his legs to the state from before. Using either the stick or the frame makes him feel like an old man, and the feeling doubles when Buck, the hunk of a man that he is, is nearby, so he refuses to use it when Buck is around. Which ends with Buck helping him around by placing an arm around his back and holding his hand with the other whenever Eddie needs to move.

Which is an absolutely amazing feeling because Buck is both the gentlest of giants, always knowing when Eddie needs reassurance and so freaking fit and big, Eddie can just rest against his chest whenever he feels wobbly or needs comfort from the embarrassment. It's a very contrasting feeling because it makes Eddie want to be held and pecked all over his face and thrown into the wall to make out.

Eddie's physical fitness improves and he misses Buck's touch the second his therapist says he can start moving without assistance.

That's the only problem Eddie has — Buck refuses to touch him. Again, he knows it's a bit weird with Eddie not remembering. At first, he thought it was just Buck giving him the lead on how much he wants them to do but then Buck keeps on ducking out any time Eddie initiates something.

He goes in for a kiss when Buck is drinking coffee and he dodges, standing up before Eddie can try again. Eddie gives Chris a kiss goodbye and goes to give Buck one, where he's standing next to their kid, and Buck skips out the door, telling him he's going to start the AC in the car. He tries to curl up against his side on the couch and Buck gets up with an excuse of making popcorn or tea or anything else possible. When Eddie slips into the shower while Buck is brushing his teeth, he leaves the bathroom with the toothbrush still in hand. Buck pretends to be asleep when he kisses his neck and swats Eddie's hands off when he moves them under his t-shirt when they're spooning, always calls out Eddie in the dark, like he isn't sure Eddie is comprehending what he's doing.

(Buck is pretty sure Eddie is trying to kill him — just make him have a heart attack or something — even if not deliberately. He isn't suspecting a thing about Eddie's partners assumption.)

It's like Eddie has a partner that loves him but without the bits that are funny. Like, he thought life-affirming sex is a thing and he is cleared for physical activity now and still out of work and going stir-crazy.

He doesn't get it and he can't talk about this with Buck because it almost feels like Buck is rejecting him, every time he ducks away from Eddie's affection or doesn't reciprocate it.

"Buck is—He loves me, right? He hasn't stopped after the accident, he's—He finds me attractive, he wants me, right?"

(Hen, sweet Hen, thinks he figured out Buck is in love with him now that he has a bit of an outsider perspective, and mutters, "Oh boy," cursing in her head because it's too early for this conversation. She isn't even suspecting Eddie heard partners once and ran wild with it.)

"I don't see where you're going with this," Hen says diplomatically.

"It's just, he's not doing anything about it," he explains. "It feels like he's barely touching me."

Hen is freaking out because of all times, Eddie had to realize now—"Do you... want him to touch you?"

"Have you seen him?" Eddie asks and then frowns. "Oh, right, playing for a different team."

"You just had a brain injury," she points out, hoping Eddie will find his brain somewhere, actually, and think.

"It's been almost two months, the doctors say I'm fine, memories aside," he says stubbornly.

"Eddie, I don't think Buck is going to make any first moves when you don't remember the past five years you guys—" She needs to change the track because she's saying too much. "Why don't you just talk to him about it?"

"And say what? Please bend me over our kitchen table? Please shower with me? Please give me kisses goodbye? Please hold me at night?"

"You probably should start with something more...tame," Hen suggests.

He's tried tame — he's tried initiating kisses and hugs and Buck doesn't respond. It's like he is afraid to touch him and Eddie isn't made of glass.

He needs to do something drastic.

So at night, he waits for Buck to come to bed, lights dimmed, and when Buck pulls the covers away to slide into bed with him, Eddie is naked — he can't be more blunt, if this flies over Buck's head, he'll be worried.

"Oh my god," Buck keeps on repeating, not looking at Eddie, blindly trying to put the covers over Eddie.

"Oh, come on, I can't be more obvious," he complains. "Why can't you just touch me, Evan?"

He's taking deep breaths, not looking at Eddie at all and this is the opposite of what he aimed for. "You don't want me, Eddie, you don't even know me."

"I definitely want you," he protests, irritated. He knows what he wants, it's Buck who's been missing the signals right and left. "And I know you, you're my partner, my Buck—I know you want this, too."

It's the truth — when he thinks Eddie can't notice, he looks at him like Eddie is everything he could ask for. He wants him to look at him like that now, too. He knows Buck, even if memories aren't there.

"We're not doing anything until you get your memories back and you actually know who I am."

"What if I never get my memories back?"

Buck doesn't reply and for a second Eddie think he got him, but then Buck stands up from the bed and says, "I think I should move out."

"What?" Eddie protests because that's definitely not what he was aiming for. Buck's place is with them, even if things in their relationship are a bit dry or stilled. "And where exactly would you go?"

"I do actually have my own place, you know?"

And how Eddie was supposed to know? He lives with them. He should not have a back-up place to go.

"I think I'm sending you mixed signals and you obviously don't remember enough to interpret them with clarity in your head," he tells Eddie and leaves.

He actually leaves the house, too, no matter how much he's asking to just sit down and listen to him. He spends the night trashing from side to side, expecting Buck to be back any moment but never getting him back.

(Meanwhile, Buck doesn't go to the loft because everything is dusty in there since he's moved into Eddie's place when he had to take care of Chris when he was still unconscious. Instead, he goes to Maddie's and complains to her over a glass of wine, aiming to stay on her couch overnight. "You didn't see him, Maddie, he was just lying there like a starfish, completely naked, going all, now you can touch me all you want—" and Chim wakes up Jee with how hard he drops the pans he was pretending to clean while eavesdropping.)

Buck comes back in the morning to take Chris to school — he doesn't offer Eddie to take him together and they don't talk at all.

Eddie needs to talk to someone about this because he might have somehow ruined the relationship with the man he's pretty sure he'd like to marry one day. By wanting him to touch him, of all things. But everyone is at work.

Pepa is retired, though. The problem is, Eddie isn't about to tell her Buck had threatened to move out because Eddie wanted him to fuck him.

So he asks the more appropriate question, "Why are we not married yet, actually?"

Maybe if they were married, Buck wouldn't have some secret place to escape. Maybe he'd feel like he can touch Eddie because Eddie is his on paper, too.

Pepa gives him a look that says he's crazy. "Who?"

"Buck and I, obviously." Forget crazy, Pepa stares at him like he's insane. "What? Does Buck—not want to get married? Did I say anything about this to you?"

"Mijo," she says, sounding like it pains her to do so. "You and Buck are not—you're not together, Eddie."

Eddie laughs because that's—that's not possible, they're partners, Buck's been taking care of him and Chris since Eddie woke up, and long, long before that even if Eddie doesn't remember it. He's Eddie's power of attorney and next of kin and he's in Eddie's will, he's all but a step away from adopting Chris, knows all of Chris' and Eddie's medical history, their allergies, their likes and dislikes. He's Eddie's partner.

Pepa is not laughing, just looking at him with that pitying expression on her face,

"But—he loves me, he loves Chris, he loves us," he says dumbly.

"Believe me, I know, we all know," she says. "We've tried stirring you in the right way but you're very stubborn, mijo."

[dinogoofy]

Okay, reading back through my WIP for Bi-han arranged marriage part 2 has me giggling and kicking my feet an shit- but I gotta ask, would yall want a sweet cut off or a short spicy scene?? Be aware that spicy will take me just a lilll but longer to write!

And just for fun, here's a tidbit!

“You should have gotten stitches.” He rumbles. Bi-han leans over to a drawer on a bedside table, opening it and taking out a wallet sized first aid kit that even you didn't know was there. You watch him carefully as he threads the needle, steeling yourself as he starts to stitch up the cut without a word. He's not rough, but he's certainly not gentle either, and you can't help but wince once or twice.

He still looks mad when he finishes, but he’s less rough with you as he wraps bandages around your hand once again. He places it back in your lap and his thumb runs over your wedding ring. Despite the permanent scowl on his face, for once you know he's not scowling at you.

“He deserved it.” You say outright. Bi-han huffs, looking up at you with angry eyes.

“That doesn't matter.” He snarls. “If you have a problem with someone, you come to me.” You roll your eyes at that. Yeah, sure. Like he's been so great at protecting you. The thought is automatic, and for a moment it has you stalling- remembering the blood of your captors staining his hands. It's brief however, and you're still angry.

“For what? I can handle things myself, Bi-han.” He gives you a sharp glare, standing up from the floor in a quick, sudden movement. You have to look up to meet his eyes, and it almost makes you frustrated at the stupid act of intimidation.

“Can you?”

[itsclydebitches]

Did I just saw with my own two eyes an episode, where Ted’s mother shows up and acts in this very disinterested “I am not interested in you and your achievements whatsoever, you are not even the main attraction of this trip and I’m going to tell you that in this indirect passive-aggressive way, but at the same time I AM here because I am displeased with you, now guess what’s wrong while I tell lies about you to your friends and colleagues. The lies that are kind of nice but also lies and it makes you feel uncomfortable and I do not care”.

And then Ted goes back to Kansas where he can’t have his career, his friends, but he will be in contact with Michelle (who dates their couple therapist, and that is something that makes Ted very uncomfortable) and mom???? Like? And Henry never asked him to return and in fact is not suffering at all. Henry is shown to be fine. He never has meltdowns when he leaves London, he doesn’t express any hurt feelings towards Ted. They seem to just have an unconventional arrangement and Henry misses Ted, but doesn’t feel neglected. It also seems like his mom just believes that Ted should be home with his son, an unassuming father who doesn’t have public panic attacks and causes her embarrassment??? Because the way she showed him the clippings from the papers?? Boy! I don’t know how else to interpret that tbh

Ted has just achieved one of the best moments in his career and his mom actively and purposefully poisoned that moment for him, this whole thing is being contrasted to Jamie’s mom, I just don’t believe that Ted is going to stay in Kansas. That can’t be.

Also I feel like the tedependance tinfoil hat is not a tinfoil hat at all because actually! Ted having suppressed a huge part about himself (bisexuality), and not being able to live his life because of his roots works really well here.

It's precisely readings like this that make me hope a permanent Kansas ending can't be possible and likewise believe that if that is our ending... Ted Lasso will have failed in a pretty significant way. Even just a few episodes ago I was fully on team, "I 100% don't want Ted to return to Kansas, but if he does I accept that this was an ending long in the making and just because I personally dislike it doesn't make it bad." Now though? They've introduced so much lately -- and emphasized so much else from past seasons, like Ted's rocky relationship with Michelle/Jake -- that I just can't read Kansas as a positive ending for Ted anymore. It's not just me and my preferences anymore, I don't think that ending fits the show, period. Is, in fact, a betrayal of everything Ted Lasso has argued for.

Ted's mom was a big part of that feeling this episode, as you've nicely laid out, anon. It's no coincidence that in an episode titled "Mom City," Ted's story with his mother does not run parallel to Jamie's (unfailingly supportive, knows him better than he knows himself, Jamie comes to her when he's ready, an act of agency that Dottie doesn't allow Ted), but rather closer to Jamie's dad. Which I don't mean as a way to say, "She's abusive!" but rather the more nuanced take that we end the episode on: You can forgive someone while still acknowledging that they've hurt you so badly. Ted, normally so polite with his "Oh boy"s and "Darn"s and "Shucks"s really says it all with a string of direct, angry, "Fuck you"s. That level of anger and disappointment will not be magically fixed with one dinner. By continually introducing Kansas-aligned characters that make Ted uncomfortable at best, uncharacteristically angry at worst, it HEAVILY sells the idea that the space itself is no longer healthy for him. He can slowly rebuild those relationships -- and arguably should -- but that's not the same thing as throwing himself back into their mix. Allowing Ted to stay in London with visits from his family is akin to Jamie remaining removed from his dad, but sending him a text on his own terms.

As for Henry, yeah. I've been arguing for ages that Henry does not act like someone who feels abandoned and the few arguments I've seen fans bring up aren't very persuasive to me. Basically, framing every normal child struggle as a result of Ted's distance. Henry being a short-term bully is not automatically some cry for attention tethered to an absent dad -- there's no evidence for that, especially when Henry uses Ted's own teachings to realize his mistake and apologize -- and him being sad with Beard is because he's finally seeing his dad and Ted is ignoring him. I'd be sad too if I hadn't seen someone in a while and they were spiraling instead of hanging with me. That doesn't mean I need them to drastically change their life to accommodate me in new ways. Henry as a character needs to be allowed to make mistakes without that automatically reflecting badly on what Ted has chosen for his own happiness and mental health. Anyway, yeah, Henry has consistently been shown to likewise be happy, well-adjusted, and fully engaged with Ted through visits/over Zoom, so this claim that Henry needs his dad in this way doesn't jive with three seasons of Henry flourishing through Ted's parenting this other way.

All of which means that, frankly, I think we should take Dottie's "Your son misses you" with a serious grain of salt. That's a damn broad statement because of COURSE Henry misses Ted and vice versa, but that basic reality of missing people in life when you're separated from them doesn't mean he misses him in the way that I think Dottie is implying: he's hurting to an extent that you need to fix in this specific way (moving back home). Beyond everything you've listed about how Dottie makes Ted uncomfortable, I think it's significant that she has Very Traditional Ideas about how this family should function. She couches it in a lot of humor and starts to demonstrate a bit more open-mindedness at the end of the episode, but we're still left with:

Telling all Ted's friends that he's done Amazing, Unique, Super Cool Things That are Objectively Impressive. To be clear, I found her interactions with the team as funny and surface-wholesome as we were supposed to, but I do think there was this underlying implication that Dottie is not as satisfied with Ted's choices as Ted himself is, so she 'accidentally' makes up stories that make him seem 'better' than he actually is. This is compounded by what you've pointed out, about how she only gives a cursory congratulations for this MONUMENTAL achievement. Compare that to Jamie's mom absolutely loosing her shit in support of him.

She brings the 'gift' of the clippings -- Ted should be GRATEFUL for this. Only a terrible son would be upset by a mother keeping track of his accomplishments! -- which not only include the headlines about the panic attacks, but she's situated them front and center, ensuring they're the first thing Ted sees. Combine that with her 'concerned' question about whether he's still getting panic attacks and you have this strong implication that Ted Is Bad For Showing Weakness. Men don't do that. The Lassos don't do that. They bury things in positivity, even the suicide of a father/husband. The fact that Ted immediately lies and says the panic attacks are gone says it all. He knows trying to explain this to her is a lost cause.

Speaking of mental health, are you really seeing that therapist? Oh, well, good for you, I guess. Me? No, no, no, I would never see one. I'm going to be suspicious of it to the point of implying that it's a flaw to need one. This is the one point where I cut Dottie a lot of slack because Ted himself went through the same arc of needing to accept the benefits of therapy, but we're nevertheless seeing where he (in part) got that biased perspective from.

There are a lot of throwaway lines that paint Dottie as a Good Traditional Mother, very much in contrast to Ted Lasso's queer, open-minded, gender roles-bending world. She continually reminds him that she is NOT having sex, it's those Australians. Why-ever would an older woman be having loud, enthusiastic sex? (Compare that to Rebecca nearly getting it on with the boat guy, a celebration of romance and sexuality for older women.) Dottie can't take the bed. That's not the polite thing to do. She needs to be coaxed into accepting even the simplest of care while, simultaneously, expecting Ted to offer it despite the inconvenience. (If I bring up the awful hostel I've been staying in you'll offer to let me crash here instead, right?). That's one of the big differences between Ted and his mother: Ted has a lot of trouble accepting help, but honestly doesn't expect anything in return for the intense kindness he doles out to others. In contrast, Dottie has trouble admitting that she's accepting help, she pretends to do the nice thing while waiting for someone to insist strongly enough that she do what she's wanted to do from the get-go, then she's off the hook because, well, they basically made her. Will Dottie go to a football game like Henry and Higgins and Rebecca and Keeley and Bex and all the other emotionally open characters, screaming for her son in the midst of chaotic action? Oh no. No, no, no, that's not for her. She'll just stay home and do the Proper Thing of making a home-cooked dinner for her little boy... while making him feel guilty about that by sending texts about how now she kinda does wish she was at the game. The conclusion to their moment of honesty and growth is Ted (a man, the child in the relationship) serving her (the woman, the mother) for once, which I think highlights how much of the Good Traditional Kansas Woman mask Dottie has learned to maintain.

All of which is to say that we've been introduced to a loving but incredibly flawed mother who puts a LOT of stock in old-school values and appearances. There's no way that this all doesn't extend to her views on Henry, her grandson. Right now, Dottie is not someone who can fully embrace Ted's nontraditional style of life (divorced, in therapy, taking some risks like drinking not-actually-drugged tea) or parenting (long-distance, "It takes a village"). She doesn't outright reject Ted's choices, but she does spend the entire episode being passive-aggressive, even manipulative at times, to make it very clear that she does not approve of all this. When she says, "Your son misses you" it reads as a very biased view of the situation, driven by the idea that no child could possibly be happy without that nuclear family living their white-picket fence life in the good old US-of-A. Ted needs to move back to Kansas not because of Henry, but because that's what Good Fathers Do. I don't think Dottie should be seen as a reliable source here for what Henry actually wants or needs. She certainly hasn't been a reliable source for Ted.

Which -- as said numerous times -- paints Kansas in an incredibly negative light. We haven't actually seen Ted in Kansas on the show, so our understanding of his relationship with that place is filtered through the people living there. Michelle, Jake, and Dottie are all emotional landmines that Ted still needs a lot of time to diffuse and Henry is written as perfectly content with their arrangement. If Ted permanently goes back to Kansas I'm really gonna be ????????????????????????????????? about it.

[bubski-mcboo]

Why "No Nightingales?" It's a safe word!

@destructokitty34 this is for you - thank you for the inspiration.

So I was reading an article which I'll link here when it becomes relevant. This post is semi-related to the "Crowley put something in Aziraphale's mouth" theory, which I didn't subscribe to until a new, related theory hit me like a sodding truck.

Strap in my ineffable nutters, this is going to be a pretty long and wild ride.

It's their song, duh.

Well, yes.

It is heavily implied, though not outright stated, that the song A Nightingale Sang in Berkeley Square by Vera Lynn is Aziraphale and Crowley's "song" - i.e. a song that couples sometimes choose to represent their relationship.

At the end of season one, it was playing at the Ritz, and attention was drawn to it by God. It was not acknowledged by anyone in character unless you count the pianist actually playing it.

The end of season two is the only time we hear it referenced again.

We are led to believe that this was Crowley's way of ending it with Aziraphale, albeit with one last final attempt to get him to change his mind.

HOWEVER

Crowley has known Aziraphale for a long time. He knows Azzie's idiosyncracies, he knows when he's "going too fast" for Azzie, and has learned over the years how to gently and carefully nudge Azzie out of his comfort zone, such as introducing him to food for the first time, "the arrangement," and the holy water, to name a few off the top of my head.

Do we really believe that Crowley would make such a colossal mistake?

I concede it's possible that Crowley wasn't thinking clearly at that moment.

But here is what I think...

"No Nightingales" Is A Safe Word!

So, hear me out. Some of you may have already clunked the pieces of the puzzle together and already agree with me, and some of you might think I need to sit the f down. Both are valid, but let me say my piece anyway.

Here's how I came up with this theory.

The Clues

The theme of a couple having a song is smacked squarely in our faces with the Gabriel-Beelzebub reveal.

Sometimes a couple's song marks a particularly strong and important memory.

Sometimes a couple's song is one they happen to love, and it maybe reminds them of each other, but they never say it out loud, because they don't need to. They just know, because they never say what they're thinking, that this is "their song"

But also, sometimes a song... "Contains information in a tuneful way."

Okay, I know Crowley didn't sing it. It's the "contains information" part that I'm latching on to. I didn't think much of that line, other than it being a "mhm, yeah that's true" kind of moment.

Until now, obviously.

Aziraphale's Reaction

Look, look, look!

Aziraphale senses something is wrong, in a different way from before. He is on full Alert.

Look at Aziraphale's reaction. Sure, you could interpret that as,

"Oh shit, he's serious,"

but nah, see...

Here is the dialogue along with what I think the subtext is, based on Azzie's reaction: Crowley: "Exactly. No Nightingales." Crowley: "You/we are in danger." Aziraphale glares at Crowley. (taken from the audio description) Aziraphale senses something is wrong, in a different way from before. He is on full Alert. Crowley: "You idiot. We could have been... Us." Crowley: "Everything I do and say now isn't really me. It's going to hurt us both. I'm sorry. Aziraphale turns away and starts to cry. (AD) Aziraphale: "Pointing out and blaming our imminent and permanent separation solely on me is the worst thing you could do. Crowley kisses Aziraphale. Aziraphale: "I stand corrected."

Note that the emotional stakes of this kiss had it been as a means to transfer something, are not undermined due to this theory, which is crucial for a theory to stand in my opinion.

Aziraphale looks at Crowley with disappointment (also taken from the audio description) Aziraphale: "I HATE that you have corrupted our first kiss like this. I'm about to say something significant, perhaps, 'I can't believe you did that, or maybe even 'I love you,' but you've just told me we're in danger, so I have to be tactful. How do I say something loving and scathing at the same time? Oh, I know..." Aziraphale: "I forgive you." Crowley: "Don't bother." (no subtext here. He meant what he said).

It fits well with other meta

See here for @actual-changeling's post about how the kiss may have been with tongue, which in turn supports the "Crowley put something in Aziraphale's mouth," theory.

I am still sort of on the fence about this one, but it does seem far more likely in my mind now that I have this "safe word theory" living rent-free in my head.

To Conclude

My theory is that "No Nightingales" was a safe word, and this might support the "Crowley put something in Aziraphale's mouth" theory.

I will update this post later as this was sort of a messy, raw brain dump. I know I have more to say about this, especially relating to the beats leading up to this nightingale moment and what came after. There's also other meta swimming in my head which might be compatible, but I may have to think about separating those posts out.

But right now, it's 4.46am as of writing this and I need to go to bed.

[copperbadge]

I'm sure I'm not being original, but surely there is an au where the King and Queen Emeritus court Jes Demos together? Given that the Queen had, uh, gal pals in their shared bed.

I think you're the first to suggest it actually!

(Honestly if I knew how much I'd expand this universe I would possibly not have had Miranda die, but that would have changed the series a lot and it's a trouser leg of time we won't go down.)

I can definitely see an AU where Miranda never got sick, and Michaelis and Miranda retired similar to the time frame in the books but found themselves still a little at loose ends the way Michaelis did in canon. I think Miranda, who could be imperious at times, might have been rather offended that Jes didn't do them the courtesy of notifying the palace they were doing the podcast about the country; she might very well have marched down to the recording studio to give that Deimos a piece of her mind not because she didn't like the podcast but because she felt it would have been polite to inform them.

I think a fight between her and Jes would have been fucking epic ("It's common courtesy!" "Are you attempting to curtail the freedom of the press?" "Are you delusional??" etc) and also extremely hot. And then Miranda would vent to Michaelis, who as a diplomat would attempt to smooth things over by inviting Jes and Lachlan to dinner on neutral ground and negotiating the Pax Podcastrum.

After which Lachlan would undoubtedly be like "it's a good thing you're bi because they both want a turn" which Jes scoffs at but also finds intriguing, and we go from there. It does add some twists and turns since Miranda would probably be the one more overtly interested, and Michaelis might just be like "If you like them, that's enough for me," but take a while to warm up to Jes.

In the canon, and this will pop up at some point, Miranda and Michaelis didn't have an open marriage (not that I thought you implied that, just clarifying generally) -- they had one close, intimate friend who wasn't around very much but basically was their booty call when she visited. I plan to have her show up eventually and be delighted by Jes and the positive change they've made in Michaelis. In this possible AU scenario I can see Michaelis and Miranda discussing the idea of perhaps a more permanent and stable arrangement with Jes. It'd be an interesting story to write, I think. The Emeriti Take A Young Lover. :D (I mean Jes is younger than they are...)

Fascinating to consider what they might tell Gregory and Noah. Not to mention whether the press would eventually get wind of it. I remember listening to one of my regular podcasts and one of the hosts speaking openly, but somewhat suddenly, about her polyamory, and my eyebrows shooting up. Not in judgement, I have no problem with polyamory and a lot of poly friends, it was just unexpected to hear someone being that upfront about it in a public forum that wasn't explicitly about the topic. I suspect the general reaction of the populace would be a) what and b) yeah if I could take any two of those people to bed I would too.

Be especially funny if at first everyone thinks it's an affair but can't figure out which one of them is cheating. Miranda would enjoy herself hugely. "We can finally have a sex scandal after forty years of marriage, my love. Let me at least bask in it for a week or two."

[michelleleewise]

The Proposal

Pairing: Sugardaddy Loki x reader

Warnings: dom loki, sub reader, mild swearing, smut, light bandage (consentual), mentions of subspace, edging, orgasm denial

Summary: the weekend is finally here, and Loki introduces you to something new....

**yup.....another long one.......sorry.......not really though.......well kinda......but no.......🤣💚

Part Six-

It was finally Friday and your nervous energy was through the roof, Loki had told you this weekend he was going to introduce you to a few things and honeslty you couldn't wait. You had felt a bit better after your talk with a few days ago, but then questioned why you even felt that way. He wasn't your boyfriend, you weren't dating...so why did the thought of him sleeping with someone else bother you so much.....

You made it home from school deciding to call the one person who could help. "Hey y/n, everything ok?" Tanya asked on the other end "yes, I just..can I ask you something?" You asked sitting on your bed "shoot." She said. "Ok so, with my...daddy...is it normal to feel...like jealous?" You asked biting your lip. "Honestly for you, that doesn't surprise me." She said laughing "what does that mean?" You asked laughing. "Y/n, you are a very emotional creature, but you have to remember in your arrangement there are no emotions." You heard her say "you can't get attached to him because it isn't permanent, you have to kinda close off that part of your brain." She said. "Yeah, that makes sense." You sighed.

"Who else is he sleeping with?" She asked "he said no one, Just me." You told her. "Wait....just you?" She asked "yeah, he said he prefers only one partner." You said hearing silence on her end. "Hmm...well the best advice I can give you is don't get too deep, try to turn your feelings off and just enjoy it for what it is...hot sex every weekend" She said making you laugh "ok, I'll try." You said "I've gotta go, he's going to be here in a bit." You said standing up. "Ok, and y/n be careful. I don't want you to get hurt." She said "I will, I promise. I'll talk to you later." You said hanging up. You pulled off your uniform and headed for the shower.

You dried off slipping the green lingerie set on Loki had given you looking at yourself in the mirror. Flipping your hair to the side you practiced your best "fuck me" eyes, placing your hand on your hip trying to look sexy. Frowning you grabbed your robe "God im awkward." You said to yourself laughing as you made your way to the living room. You looked at your phone seeing you had ten minutes before Loki arrived you paced back and forth squeezing the tie of your robe as your nervous energy returned. What was he going to do, would you like it..you liked everything so far. You were pulled from your thoughts hearing the front door open.

You walked to the entry way seeing Loki smile at you "Hello pet, you don't have to meet me at the door." He said closing the door turning back to you "but...I wanted to." You purred walking up behind him grabbing the collar of his coat sliding it down his arms hanging it up. "Oh..is that so?" He asked turning towards you. You looked up into his eyes, they really were the most beautiful green, his long obsidian hair gently curling around his shoulders. Your eyes wandered over his features, his sharp jaw line..his flawless skin..his neck that you wanted to suck on. Your eyes traveled down to his broad chest, biting your lip wanting to run your fingers up and down chest and abs.

"What is going through that pretty head of yours pet?" He asked smirking. "C..can I touch you sir..please." You asked looking back to his eyes. "Well..since you've been good i will allow it." He said smirking. You reached forward slowly, grabbing his shirt you looked into his eyes as you untucked it, reaching up loosening his tie you slid it from around his neck dropping it to the floor. He reached forward, pulling the tie on your robe slipping his hands under the fabric he slid it down your arms "Mm pet...you do look exquisite in my colors." He smiled running a finger under your bra strap. You smiled reaching up you unbuttoned his shirt exposing his chest and abs. You bit your lip as your fingers traced the lines of his abs hearing him sigh.

You looked up seeing his Adam's apple bob up and down, stepping closer you reached up on your toes placing a gentle kiss on it as your fingers ran up. You laid your hands flat rubbing his chest as you placed an opened mouth kiss at his pulse point, sucking gently hearing him moan. One hand slid to the other side of his neck, the other slid around to his back, pulling him towards you moaning feeling his skin on yours. How was it possible to be warm and cool at the same time. He reached up lacing his fingers in your hair pulling your head back gently to look at him. "My turn pet." He smiled making you shiver. "Go to the bedroom, take these off and lie on the bed." He said sternly "yes sir." You said rushing off to your room.

You laid down on your back looking at the ceiling biting your lip. "Pet, how did you feel about being restrained?" He asked walking up to your side. "I..I liked it sir." You said looking into his eyes. "I am going to try something, what's the safeword?" He asked watching you "red sir." You said firmly "good girl, are you ready?" He asked. "Y...yes sir." You said as two pieces of green fabric appeared in his hands. "How did you.." you started seeing him wink "Magic pet...now don't move." He said sternly leaning over tying the fabric to the column of the bed frame, grabbing your wrist he tied a loose knot before going to the other side tying your other wrist. "Pull." He said as you attempted to bring your arms down with no success. "Comfortable?" He asked "yes sir im good." You said settling your head down on the pillow.

"Look at me." He said making you lift your head seeing a silver bar with two leather straps at each end appear in his hand. Since your arrangement began you had done your research wanting to be prepared and you remembered seeing one being used in a video you watched, a pleasure device used to keep your legs spread open for him while he dominated you. "Do you know what this is?" He asked "y..yes sir, I do." You said clearing your throat. He smiled leaning down he gently grabbed your ankle fastening the leather strap before doing the same to the other. He stood up holding the bar in the middle watching you, the look in his eyes making you shiver as he extended the bar out spreading you open for him. "How are you feeling?" He asked setting the bar down "g..good sir." You breathed watching him slide his shirt down his arms.

He kneeled between your legs, his fingers ghosting up your calves to your thighs. "You will not come until I say, understood?" He growled "y..yes sir, I understand." You breathed gripping the fabric in your hands. "Such a good girl..." he growled lowering himself between your thighs. You watched as he kissed his way up your thigh towards where you needed him, feeling his warm breath on you clit as his tongue circled it slowly. You layed your head back on the pillow feeling him lick from your entrance to your clit when his lips latched around it sucking hard. Your back arched off the bed feeling his teeth nip at your bud. You tried to rock your hips against him but his iron grip held you in place.

"Oooh god....sir...i..." you moaned feeling his tongue pressing harder on your bud. He gripped your hips harder growling vibrating your core. You lifted your head, your eyes meeting his as he licked and sucked, the site almost making you come on the spot. You threw your head back pulling on your restraints feeling his finger circling your entrance slowly sliding inside. You gasped as he added a second, slowly pumping in and out of you as he sucked hard on your bud. "Fuck...god aah...im..." you panted feeling your walls tighten around his fingers when he suddenly pulled them out making you whine. "I said you come when I say." He growled leaning back on his knees. He crawled up leaning over you pressing his fingers to your lips "open." He growled, parting your lips he slid the two fingers that were in you into your mouth "suck pet." He said as you sealed your lips around his fingers, swirling your tongue around them "Mm that's it, clean me up." He breathed pulling them out with a pop.

He leaned down pressing his tongue past your parted lips, tasting yourself mixed with him making you moan on his mouth. You felt his cock pressing against your entrance..when did he take his pants off?..he rocked his hips against you, his cock sliding through your folds as he claimed your mouth. You tried to lift your hips to nudge him where you needed him but he pulled back "did you need something pet?" He asked smirking "y..you sir, I need you...please..." you panted "your so pretty when you beg pet." He said leaning down kissing your neck. You turned your head giving him better access when he bit down on the skin under your ear making you yelp. "Remember what I said?" He asked sternly "not to come until you say." You panted trying to scoot your hips to meet his, your restraints stopping you "good girl." He growled as he thrust into you, bottoming out making you cry out.

He slowly rocked his hips back and forth with long deep strokes, not near enough for you to reach your peak. You began lifting your hips to meet his thrusts when his hand pushed your hips down holding you there "patience pet, you take what I give you." He growled continuing his torturous pace. You panted feeling his other hand slide under your shoulder, his fingers gripping the back of your neck as he picked up his pace, thrusting into you faster, harder hitting that soft spot inside you making your toes curl. You felt your walls clench around him, the spring threatening to snap when he suddenly slowed to his previous pace feeling your orgasm slip away "pleeease sir...please let me come..." you begged feeling yourself get lightheaded. "Not yet pet." He said leaning down pressing his lips to yours feeling his hips rock against yours.

His thrusts began to speed up again, slamming into you hard "aaah sir...i..im...gonna..." you panted gripping the fabric around your wrists you were on the edge of release when he stopped entirely, your orgasm denied again your eyes began to water looking up at him "please....please let me come....i need to feel you....please daddy.." you cried out in frustration feeling him wipe your tears away "since you asked so nicely." He smirked kissing your cheek he leaned back on his knees gripping your hips he thrust hard and fast, jolting you up the bed as he snapped his hips against you. The sounds of your moans and his grunts filled your ears "are you going to come pet....ahhh fuck...I can feel you squeezing me life a vice..." he groaned hitting your cervix "y...yeesss...God im...aaahh..." you trailed off, your brain stopped working as you neared your peak.

"Come pet....aahhh come for me now!" He growled as your orgasm slammed into you, your walls clenching hard making him moan loudly "Gods y/n...your so...so fucking good....aaahhh..." he cried out slamming into you hard releasing inside you. He slowly thrust into a few more times riding you through your highs, leaning over you he gently grabbed your chin making you look at him. Your eyes met his, your head feeling light and fuzzy, your body tingling as your limbs went limp. You felt him grab your wrists guiding them down to your side "stay right here, do you understand pet?" He asked as you nodded "use your words pet." He said sternly "y..yes sir." You mumbled feeling him lift off you, doing something with your ankles as he laid your legs down.

You stared at the ceiling, your mind wandering when you felt the bed dip between your legs, a warmth touching your core making you hiss "I know, I just need to clean you up pet, hold still." You heard him say. You felt the weight on the bed leave, turning your head seeing Loki by your nightstand "sit up pet." He said pulling you up setting you in his lap wrapping a blanket around you "drink this." He said holding a glass of water to your lips. You drank slowly looking at him. He pulled the glass away setting it down. "Your so pretty." You said seeing him smile "so are you pet." He said tucking your hair behind your ear. "Your cock feels nice too." You said laying your head on his shoulder "well I'm glad you like it." He said laughing. You sighed closing your eyes nuzzling into his neck. "Mmm you smell nice too." You said "thank you pet, how are you feeling?" He asked "good, im.....good." you smiled feeling his hand rubbing your back.

A few minutes later the fog in your brain lifted, looking down realizing you were sitting in his lap you looked up at him "there you are, how are you feeling?" He asked smiling. "W..what happened?" You asked "You went into sub space." He said watching you. "What..what is that?" You asked "I'll explain tomorrow, right now you need water and rest. Are you hungry?" He asked "no, just exhausted." You said yawning. He lifted you off his lap pulling your duvet down he laid you down pulling it up around you "sleep in tomorrow, I want you to rest after tonight and we'll talk more when I come over tomorrow." He said sternly "yes sir." You smiled snuggling under the covers. "And plenty of water, I mean it." He said "I will sir i promise." You said "good girl, I'll see you at 6 sharp tomorrow." He said leaning down kissing your head turning off the light.

You closed your eyes vaguely registering the door opening and closing as you drifted off to sleep and the world around you fell away.....

💚🐍💚🐍💚🐍💚🐍💚🐍💚🐍💚🐍💚🐍💚🐍💚

@vbecker10 @lokisgoodgirl @holdmytesseract @el-zef @ijuststareatstuffhereok89 @123forgottherest @lovebyloki @javagirl328 @loopsisloops @high-functioning-lokipath @immersed-in-mischief @chantsdemarins @lokisasgardianvampirequeen @midnights-ramblings @slpnbty2001 @angelaf1978 @sinsandguilt @usagishira @xorpsbane @lokifriggadottir365 @your-taste-on-my-lips @asgardianprincess1050 @cakesandtom @agentandreastark @sekaishell @dukes2581 @aniar4wniak @spork-fighter @stupidthoughtsinwriting @d1a2n389 @hypergamer7744 @buttercupbestie @cabingrlandrandomcrap @lokiprompts @daggers-and-mischief @kats72 @mochie85 @commanding-officer @lokis-coffee221 @huntress-artemiss @limiworld @lulubelle814 @idfkgabby @glitterylokislut @highkeysimpingforloki @myworldgoesboomz @lonadane @budugu @cloud-of-daisies @all-envy-suyu

[julieverne]

Maura had hidden cameras in her kitchen.

She also had one in Jane's kitchen, with a view of her front door, fire escape and living room.

Jane had been taken from her more than once. She wasn't willing to risk losing her permanently.

She didn't watch when Jane was there, usually. Sometimes she turned on the audio when she couldn't sleep so she could hear Jane breathe, no matter how far apart they were. The microphone could pick it up from the bedroom easily.

Jane slept late and little. No wonder she consumed so much coffee.

Jane slept fully dressed on the couch more than she should as well, but she refused Maura's offers to let her stay. She'd been withdrawn lately. Susie's death had barely grazed her. She never mentioned her, even when Maura desperately needed to talk about the woman who'd been at her side for four years of her life.

Maura heard a muffled moan and let her eyes open. Jane was asleep sitting up again, and her sleep didn't look restful. It looked stressful, her hands wringing the blanket on her lap.

"Maura!" Maura sat up with shock as Jane jolted awake, fumbling with her phone holster. Maura muted the tablet on her bedside table as she reached for her own phone, picking up as Jane's face flashed on the screen.

"Maura?"

"Jane?"

"Okay. You're okay. You are okay, aren't you?"

Maura looked at Jane on the screen, running her hands through her hair then running her thumb and middle finger of her free hand over her eyebrows so she could rest her head in her hand.

"It's two am. I'm as okay as someone can be at two am. Is there a body? Do you need me?"

"Yeah. I mean no, no body. Just needed to make sure you were okay."

"I'm fine, Jane." Jane sank back onto the couch and Maura watched, fascinated. Jane's free hand rubbed the back of her neck, then pulled her gun from the holster, pulling her phone holster off as well so she could remove her belt.

And her pants.

"Jane?" Maura asked. Jane had been quiet a while. There was noise of a struggle, then Jane's bra was evicted from under her shirt. Jane swayed as she got to her feet, taking her gun with her to the bedroom.

Maura hadn't bugged the bedroom. It felt too intimate, even to two women who were used to intimacies. She heard Jane's sigh as she slumped against the mattress, heard her arrange herself, the crumple of the cotton covers. She could picture Jane there, curled a little onto her side, her mouth slack without the energy for smart-aleck remarks. She heard Jane yawn.

"Jane?" Maura asked again.

"Tell me something you've always wanted to tell me. Something sciencey. Tell me your version of a bedtime story."

It was kind of sweet, that Jane wanted Maura to stay on the line as she fell asleep.

"Well, the metabolic rate of..." Maura kept going until she heard Jane's breaths deepen into sleep, then kept going a while longer, hoping some of it would permeate into Jane's subconscious mind.

"And as for something I've always wanted to tell you? I love you, Jane. Sweet dreams."

Maura hung up, went to the bathroom and went back to bed. Jane was back in the living room, pacing this time. Maura's breath caught, and she turned on the volume again. Jane hadn't been asleep, and Maura's confession had been heard. She'd said it before, but it hadn't felt like a dirty secret back then, when Jane had loved her just as much. When they'd lived in each other's pockets, at one home or the other, always together. That Jane, the one who'd loved Maura, would have held her when she looked at Susie for the last time. That Jane wouldn't have let her sleep alone, wouldn't have told her to find a uniform to drive her home. That Jane would have made her feel safe and loved.

This Jane paced urgently, rubbing her scarred hands, chewing her nails. She slammed her palms against the counter, then her fist against a wall.

"I can't," Jane said out loud, cradling her hand to her chest. Maura longed to check it for herself, to hold it tenderly and attempt to kiss it better. "I can't love her." Her voice cracked. "I can't keep her safe. I can't even keep myself safe. I gave up Jo because who knows who was going to break in here and hurt her to get to me." Jane paced again, still holding her hand. "So if I can't love her, she can't love me. I was half asleep. I must have dreamt it. Yeah, I must have. I can't, so she can't." Jane put the blanket over her lap again, gun in hand, facing the door.

---

Maura woke when Jane did, a little under a hour later. Jane groaned and ran her hand through her hair, looked at her phone and her gun in her lap and took them both to the bedroom. Maura turned up the volume. She heard Jane flop onto the bed. Then, a deep ragged breath. Like another nightmare. And then, in an impossible low, husky voice, Maura's own name.

Maura rang this time, and Jane snapped when she answered the phone.

"Maura! Geez!"

"I just wanted to make sure you were okay. I though I heard you say my name in a dream I had."

Jane appeared in the kitchen, washing her hands. No. One hand. Odd behaviour, even for Jane.

"I'm fine," Jane snapped. She was even more agitated than usual.

"Did I wake you?" Jane had been this rude and snippish with her lately, and Maura was hurt. Wondering what she'd done wrong.

"No, I just... are you okay? You sound..."

Maura knew she sounded sad, but Jane surprised her.

"You sound scared. Are you okay?" Jane went back to the couch, and Maura almost touched the screen, wanting to be closer to her. Knowing she shouldn't watch Jane in her private moments but unable to look away.

"I just - I think you fell asleep. I just wanted to tell you I love you."

"You shouldn't."

"But I do."

"Please don't." Jane's voice was small and low and fragile, as though if Maura pushed Jane might break.

"Jane. It's nearly four am. I called because you called because you were worried about me and it made me worried about you. Of course I love you."

"You can't."

"I can, and I do."

"I don't want you to."

"Jane. Tell me you don't love me, and I'll get out of your life. You've been pushing me away. If you want me gone, just say it. You can have Angela back, and I can work abroad like I've always wanted to. Just tell me and I'll leave."

"I don't -" Maura could hear the anguish in Jane's voice, could see it on her face. "I don't want you to leave."

"If you don't love me then I have no reason to stay in Boston. Do us both a favour and tell me the truth." It wasn't like Maura wanted to go, but she'd spent half a decade following this woman who wouldn't even hug her when her dear friend and co-worker died. She couldn't love that Jane. She loved the one from their past, but perhaps that version of Jane no longer existed.

Jane hung up, then threw her phone across the room. She huddled on the floor, knees to her chest. And Jane wept.

Maura turned the tablet off. In the morning she could put the house on the market. Or perhaps keep Angela on as a tenant - the Rizzolis had always been more at home here than she'd ever been. No, she wanted to sever ties. She'd buy Angela a property somewhere else, make it look like she'd inherited it from someone else. Cailin was in London, and Maura could join her, then go back to Paris. She'd missed the cities of her childhood.

---

Jane called twice more that night, but Maura rejected both calls, then blocked her number. She couldn't resist checking the tablet, watching Jane pace again before turning it off.

---

There was a tentative knock at Maura's door at six am. Maura checked her perimeter camera on the tablet. Jane, looking contrite. She sighed and considered not answering it but her car was on the street. Jane knew she was home.

Jane smiled as Maura opened the door, roses clenched in her hand like a weapon, held out stiffly in offering.

"I love you," Jane said quickly. "Okay? There, you win. I've always loved you. I don't love you the way you love me, and that's why it's been so hard to say it."

Maura watched as Jane's cheeks flushed.

"How?"

"Like a... like a man would. Like a man would love you. That's how I love you."

Jane wouldn't meet Maura's eyes, and Maura felt guilty now about the camera in Jane's home. The privacy she'd invaded to get this confession from Jane. She remembered the little gasp before Jane had said her name, the way Jane had washed her - oh.

"Like a man," Maura asked, hoping for clarification. Jane nodded, looking guilty. "But you're not a man. And I'm not a man."

"I guess that makes us lesbians. Or at the very least bisexuals. Hmm. I've always wanted to be bisexual."

"We are not men," Jane nodded, happy to have a solid fact to agree to.

"We are not men, but we love each other the way men love women? That's too complicated."

Maura stepped forward and kissed Jane, expecting resistance. Expecting it to be awkward. But Jane merely froze, then returned the kiss with the same kind of passionate energy she used to hunt down killers. Maura broke away and closed the front door.

"I don't think it works like that?" Jane's voice was strangled; with laughter or anxiety, Maura couldn't tell, but Jane was finally looking at her with the kind of adoration Maura had been used to from her.

"Let's find out. Form a solid conclusion based on evidence." Maura dragged Jane into the house by the hand, and then up the stairs. She regretted, now, not having a camera in her bedroom, but evidence-based science needed repeat simulations, so there was always time to install one later.

Right now she had Jane at her mercy and she was not feeling merciful at all.

[ordinaryxxgirl]

Okay, so...Update time under the cut. I'm not going on permanent hiatus, but...Yeah.

So, first off...I made it to Houston safely Sunday evening. I'm still more or less settling in, but I'll be more sporadic due to my living arrangements...And, I'm not completely fine. I still have moments...A lot of them. But...I'm safe.

As for the blog...I won't be archiving it, but unfortunately I'll be far more active on Discord than here due to my arrangements. To my new followers, I appreciate your following...But, I'm just sorry you followed at a time where I can't be as active, ahaha. If you add me on Discord, tell me here so I know, please? It's sacchiko!

Finally...I really am sorry for the dip in availability, even for me.

[eriexplosion]

Starting the journey to the final few episodes with the last nice time anyone has in this season. Pabu!

Genuinely do not understand why people consider this filler, it supports the season long theme of people trying to survive after their homes are destroyed (both with Pabu as a whole as a city of refugees and after the tsunami) AND we desperately need this come down after The Outpost because Good God.

Also this is just the most attractive opening ever. The lighting! Phee negotiating! Hunter picking up the bad vibes of both the guy trying to steal his credits and the DEVIL MURDER BUG. Wrecker beating the shit out of some guys! I could watch this all day!

Still obsessed with the fact that Omega kills. This child has taken life.

I love that Tech is playing against himself but I love more that Gonky is apparently being accusatory about it.

"WHAT other skills?" Tech does not understand the problem here. Of course she only has friends that are other clones, that is all the friends you need. Clearly!

Cid's message is still weird with the voice glitches, obviously she does turn them in but like what's with that? I have no idea if it means anything but would be interesting to see it pop back up in season 3.

"Our mutually beneficial arrangement wasn't so beneficial... mutually..." Hunter is so so beautiful and his head is sometimes so full of fluff.

God the way that Tech only slightly reacts to Phee's hand on his shoulder but REALLY reacts to "Brown Eyes" like oh he felt that one didn't he

Pabu is still so unbelievably prettyyyyyyy just look at it

Yeah ever since @niobiumao3 posted about the Archium looking like a Jedi Temple I can't get it out of my head or see anything else.

Your Artifact is Cheap

SHEP SHEP SHEP SHEP SHEP SHEP SHEP

GENUINELY I LOVE HIM SO MUCH HE IS SO GENTLE AND SOFT LOOKING, ROUND OF BELLY AND BIG OF HEART.

He has such kind eyes and I could watch him greet them over and over, I just adore seeing the batch receive kindness actually.

"You've got some competition" Wrecker knows what's up

Tech pausing to look back at Phee when she walks away is a great moment, the way that his interest really did escalate finding out that the artifact wasn't about money, it was about culture and preserving it. I just love that this is what makes him actually start to respond more obviously to her.

I just love the slow build between them, that they don't really Have a Thing yet but there's clearly mutual interest. We rarely get actual lead up or developing of attraction (also it just fits with Tech that he's more interested in her when he finds out more ABOUT her like this)

God Shep is all but inviting the Empire with the 'why would they come here?' thing.

This episode is so fantastically vital I think to the batch's story though and it's so often overlooked. They needed the option to stay behind somewhere to make their decision to go after Crosshair have weight, but they also needed somewhere that showed them what a community even looks like. The Batch has always been on their own, always been separate, they aren't used to experiencing community. I'm still not sure if they'll actually end up on Pabu permanently - it feels like part of the bittersweetness that the ending apparently has might be that they'll never really be safe from the Empire - but they still need to EXPERIENCE IT.

Also WRECKER BEING FULL FOR THE FIRST TIME IN HIS LIFE (and Tech marking the occasion lol)

PHEE SHOWING TECH THE LIGHTS <3 <3 <3 And then Hunter walking immediately between them looking vaguely ill. Is something coming or is he going to throw up, we just don't know.

I love Shep like 'if we were at risk the early warning siren would have activated' followed IMMEDIATELY by sirens. Also the water receding is really well done and honestly pretty eerie to watch.

I feel like the entire tsunami portion is often forgotten in the face of 'batch experiences 5 seconds of peace' but it's just as vital, because the community action in the face of the oncoming disaster is what makes the evacuation of Lower Pabu a success, it doesn't work unless everyone works together. Community keeps them alive!

The animation on the wave hitting is a real FLEX. That water spray.

"Property was destroyed. But my people are resilient. We'll band together and rebuild." He just lays it out, the Themes, they're right there.

[androideql]

OK, but

I've been going through one of those periods where I just want to purge my entire internet presence. It's not the worst one, but I'm also having a really hard time wanting to stick around even though I know that not doing so means people kind of... stop interacting with me, permanently. I'm not sure if it's because they find me weird, or because they lose interest, or because they think I'm being purposefully rude, or whatever other reason there might be that I haven't considered but yeah

It feels well-deserved. People can only really handle so much absence and silence until they become tired of my bullshit, and there's nothing wrong with that. If it's not a good arrangement there no reason for anyone stick around until I finally stop being strange about it, and then only for the cycle to repeat again. And at that point I really start questioning if coming here and trying to reach out was even a valid idea in the first place. If I'm always gonna be a let down so consistently that I need to keep going from person to person as they become fed up with me, then how is that a good thing? Leaving a trail of disappointed folk that will probably soon forget and move on to others that are better adjusted sound like an awful thing to do.

For someone with my condition, I sure think a lot about my inability to stick around for long enough to get comfortable with anyone. I know I make no sense. I can't make myself act in a way that does. I can't help but freeze up and spend weeks nowhere but inside my head.

Would any self-respecting adult want to stick around regardless? Do I want them to? If the answer to both is "I don't know," why am I even here?

[crossdressingdeath]

for the dark urge asks: 5 + 15 + 1 (because i really need to know why kyvir is a bard of all things for a durge)

x @zoneofsmites

(Durge asks!)

Yeah bard sure is a choice for Durge huh.

1. What circumstances led to your Dark Urge becoming their Class/Subclass? I've talked about this a little before, but when Kyvir was eleven or so and mostly living on the streets he got caught murdering someone by a woman who happened to be a not-particularly-scrupulous bard (I'm tentatively saying a tiefling woman named Euphoria, but I'm not entirely settled on that just yet). While the murder child was... a lot, she decided that his skill at sneaking around would come in handy, so she made him a deal: she wouldn't turn him in to the Fist if he stole some notes from a rival bard for her. When that went well, she offered to teach him the bardic arts in exchange for his continued services as a spy and saboteur, an arrangement that worked quite well until she ran out of things to teach him that he couldn't pick up just as well or better on his own and Bhaal got sick of his kid having affection for someone else and made him kill her. (Don't feel too bad for her, she didn't even let Kyvir live with her. This did make it easier for him to indulge his Urges without her noticing, but still!) She also taught him the basics of College of Swords stuff, but he picked up most of it on his own after her death. Also, since I'm seriously considering multiclassing him into assassin rogue next run: that came entirely by instinct, and is why he was a reasonably successful murderer before even hitting his teens.

5. What opinion does your Dark Urge have about the Gods? Keeping in mind I'm not super knowledgeable about Forgotten Realms cosmology (and setting aside Bhaal, since that's a separate question on the list)... The good gods are a bunch of self-righteous bastards and the evil gods mostly just get in the way. Kyvir's not fond of any of them. Well, except for Bane; he has a genuine, deep-seated respect for Bane. Turns out that when you've got divine daddy issues and a bone-deep terror of being out of control, the god of tyranny starts seeming like a pretty compelling option for worship! What no it's not even a little bit a sex thing shut up.

15. What is your Dark Urge’s greatest fear? Losing control of himself permanently. The way Bhaal can take control of him and force him to kill even people he very firmly doesn't want to scares him at the best of times (and plays a part in why he can't fully commit to his relationships with Gortash pre-amnesia and Astarion post-amnesia until after he's tried to kill them and they've managed to stop him), but the thought that one day his father might decide not to give control back? The idea that one day Bhaal might yank his leash tight and leave him nothing but a mindless, obedient puppet moving only at the whim of his god forever? That terrifies him. Orin's fate keeps him up at night longer than his own death does.

[cainluvr69]

Surely, We Can Make Miracles Chapter 22

Previous Chapter

Arthur: Shylock…!

Shylock: Very well done, Murr, Prince Arthur.

Arthur: I'm glad you're not hurt…! Now we just need to remove these restraints…

Murr: Wait!

Shylock: …ugh…!

Arthur: …! I'm so sorry!

Murr: Looks like the restraints are designed to damage their captive if anything is done to them. Balthazar is pretty infatuated with you, so I don't think it'll hurt you enough to kill you. Plus, we're low on time. Good thing you're great at putting up with this kind of stuff, right?

Shylock: Could you have a few more reservations about this, perhaps?

Arthur: I can't let your dear friend Murr do this to you. I'll do it.

Shylock: Prince Arthur…

Murr: Aww, you're such a good kid.

Arthur: I apologize in advance, Shylock. <Pernoctant…>

???: Stop…!

Arthur: …?!

Shylock: …It's you…

✦✧☾✧✦

Borda Island Youth: Everything's going great, Miss Natalie! There's a mob on the castle's doorstep, and it's too big to be ignored. There's no way they'll keep on letting the wizards have their market now. Thank goodness those weird incidents kept happening, with a dragon showing up, too. The seafood crackers we got that wizard from the Town of Foam to make did great work, too…

Natalie: You're being too loud. Just leave it at that. Kick up too much of a fuss, and the powers that be are going to start cracking down on things. We won't be able to buy the land we'd be able to otherwise.

Borda Island Youth: S-sorry.

Natalie: For crying out loud… We already have arrangements with several nobles to use that land for their island villas. But that meddling little lord just had to butt in… If the wizards' market is allowed to become permanent, all the land and residencies we've worked so hard to acquire will be rendered pointless. I want another order of this.

Borda Island Youth: Miss Natalie, aren't you eating a little too much?

Natalie: It's fine. It's not like I can drink right now.

Borda Island Youth: Not even a single glass? I know this little bar with a great view.

Natalie: Don't be stupid. No one will trust the flattery of a woman who smells of alcohol.

Borda Island Youth: I mean, I would. You're a real beauty, Miss Natalie.

Natalie: Fufu.

Borda Island Youth: If our plan works out, we're gonna get hitched and buy a house somewhere, right?

Natalie: Yeah, sure.

Borda Island Youth: Hehe! Then I'll work hard! Since I'm thinking about it, though, I wonder why that dragon showed up.

Natalie: No clue. If we could make sure it wouldn't actually come close to the island, it'd make for a good tourist attraction. Well, I'm stuffed. Time to get back to work.

Borda Island Youth: You sure are a hard worker.

Natalie: This is nothing more than me valuing the prep work. It's all so that when dawn breaks tomorrow, no one on the island will ever want to see another wizard's face ever again.

Borda Island Youth: Should I go with you?

Natalie: No, no need. You drank some alcohol, didn't you?

Borda Island Youth: Haha… You caught me.

Natalie: I'll be off, then.

✦✧☾✧✦

Borda Island Resident: What is it? What's going on?

Natalie: Oh, things are terrible. What can we do?

Borda Island Resident: Do you know what's going on, lady?

Natalie: There's a group of adults outside the castle, demanding the lord think of the island's children and put a stop to the wickedness of the wizards around here.

Borda Island Resident: That's pretty big… Did something happen?

Natalie: Wizards in the market distributed poisoned snacks and summoned a dragon to the outskirts of the island.

Borda Island Resident: A dragon?! Damn, I wish I could've seen that… Could you see it from here?

Natalie: Yes. It seems like they were planning on kidnapping children in the uproar.

Borda Island Resident: Holy shit!

Natalie: Right? And yet our wizard-loving lord isn't doing a thing about it…

Borda Island Resident: She's not doing anything but screwing us all over!

Natalie: Things just can't stay the way they are right now. Someone needs to do something. Maybe even someone as reliable as you…?

Borda Island Resident: Y…you're right! I'm gonna try to get the guys to hear me out about this one.

Natalie: Good luck. … Hehe…

Owen: Wow.

Natalie: …!

Owen: Looks like a pretty fun game.

Natalie: A game? Whose children are you talking about, playing this late?

Owen: I'm talking about you.

Natalie: …

Owen: I think it's fun, too. Let's talk. I'm sure we can get along.

Natalie: It's quite nice hearing that from someone as lovely as you…

Owen: I know, right.

Natalie: Do you want something from me?

Owen: Sure. What do you think it is? I could feel your intentions all over town. You know that everyone's just pretending to go along with you while laughing at you behind your back, right? So I'm here to watch you make a fool of yourself.

Natalie: … …What are you talking about?

Owen: I said, I'm talking about you. You're the one telling them the right way to jump into Hell. You know what I'm talking about, right?

Natalie: …If you want to talk with me, we should do it over drinks. Everyone's in such a tizzy this evening, the bars should be nice and empty. My boyfriend just broke up with me, so maybe you can help me feel a little less lonely…? (Heh… It should be easy enough to win over a young man like this…) (You just can't get enough of how vulnerable I look, can you?) (And his two-colored eyes are so beautiful, too…) (I think I met another young man with the same color eyes earlier this afternoon, didn't I…?) (I need to look up and make sure he's not the same man. I think I've got him wrapped around my finger enough by now…) …?!

Natalie?: …

Natalie: …Huh?! What?! You're…me?! There's another me…?!

Natalie?: Hey, don't you want to talk to me?

Natalie: What are you talking about…?! Who are you?!

Natalie?: If you don't want to talk to me, I guess I'll just have to find someone else to have fun with instead.

Natalie: …?! You're floating?! Are you a wizard…?!

Natalie?: Heeeey, listen! I was the one who was handing out the magic snacks in the market today. It was so much fun watching you all run around like idiots!

Borda Island Resident: What's going on?! There's a woman floating in the air…!

Borda Island Resident: Wait, I've seen that lady before. I thought she was human, but she was really a witch?

Borda Island Resident: Even if she is a witch, she's not one from our island! I've never seen her before!

Natalie: Wait…! Stop it…! I'm not going to be able to keep working like this!

Natalie?: Ahaha! Come on, panic more! I want to see more and more chaos!

Natalie: I said knock it off…!

Borda Island Youth: Miss Natalie, what's going on?!

Natalie: Tch…! We need to go! We can't do any more business here!

Borda Island Youth: Huh?!

Borda Island Resident: Hey now. Just what did you mean by that?!

Natalie: Shut up! Get out of my way…!

✦✧☾✧✦

Mitile: Look over there! There's a bunch of people!

Riquet: Ah…! The person in the middle of them all is the woman I talked to earlier!

Mitile: The one who was making everyone panic more, right?

Riquet: Yes! …But something seems a bit odd here… There seems to be…two of her…?

Mitile: Huh… The crowd of people looks like it's starting to break up…? The whole fuss looks like it's starting to calm down…

Riquet: You're right…

Mitile: Thank goodness! I'm glad no one will have to call the guards about it. If things aren't going to get any more worked up than this here in the market, then… That means the crowd at the castle gate won't get bigger, either.

Riquet: You're right… Let's go back and tell Nero and Dr. Figaro.

Mitile: Yeah!

Riquet: (Something really does feel different about her from earlier, though…)

Mithra: <Arthim>

Mitile & Riquet: Wah…!

Mithra: Oh, good. I can collect you both at the same time. Where's Rutile?

Mitile: He went down to the bottom of the sea to save Leno…

Mithra: The bottom of the sea?!

Mitile: Yeah, so that they could defeat the Northern wizard Balthazar…

Mithra: Defeat a Northern wizard?! I think I feel faint…

Riquet: Are you alright? I can rub your head for you.

Mithra: I need to bring him back… Oh, but first, I need to make sure Mitile is tucked away somewhere safe…

Mitile: Wa--wait a second! The Sage gave me a favor to ask you!

Mithra: A favor for the Sage…?

Mitile: Yes! After we finish baking torta di cocco, you need to bring it with you!

Mithra: I do…? Do I…need to bake it, too? Because let me tell you, no one's ever asked me to do that before. I mean, I'll do it, but.

Riquet: The first time you bake something, it might not rise properly. That happened to me when I tried.

Mithra: Huh? I can rise just fine.

Mitile: Ah, wait, sorry! No, you don't have to bake anything! You just need to wait for it to finish baking.

Mithra: What? But that's so easy. Anyway, let us return to the castle. <Arthim>

✦✧☾✧✦

Akira: Figaro…!

Figaro: Master Sage, Oz…!

Akira: We have the cintamani stone! You can save Snow and White with this, right?!

Figaro: Yes…! Thank you so much, Master Sage, Oz.

Oz: Will you succeed?

Figaro: Just who do you think you're asking? They'll be fine. I'll save them.

Oz: …

Akira: Oz?

Oz: … …I cannot feel White's presence…

Figaro: …Remember, that's Lord Snow's job. Just believe in him.

Oz: Yes. Figaro. Take some of my blood.

Figaro: …You sure?

Oz: Yes.

Figaro: Thanks, that's a real help.

Oz: I am trusting the twins will be safe in your care.

Figaro: And I'm trusting the Sage will be safe in yours. Master Sage, are you planning on meeting with the sea dragon?

Akira: …That's the plan, yeah.

Figaro: Alright. If that dragon finds out that I'm planning on saving the twins and comes here to do something about it, I'm going to kill it. I'm not going to ask you to forgive me for that. But… I did want to apologize in advance, Master Sage. I'm sorry I couldn't only do kind things for you.

Akira: … No… I'm sorry too, Figaro…I'm putting everyone through so much trouble…

Figaro: …Master Sage…

Oz: …

Figaro: …What's that face for? I'm not trying to make them cry or anything. I'm always doing my best to keep from hurting them, but things end up like this anyways.

Oz: I know you are. Do your best.

Figaro: "Do your best"?

Oz: We are leaving, Sage.

Akira: …Okay…

Oz: <Vox Nox>

Figaro: … Thank goodness, Lord Snow… I will be able to save you… I can make an antidote with the stone…

Mithra: <Arthim> Where's the torta di cocco?

Mitile: Dr. Figaro! We found Mithra!

Riquet: Things seem to be okay in town, too!

Figaro: Welcome back. You just missed the Sage, sadly.

Mithra & Mitile & Riquet: Huh?

Figaro: Look. They brought me the cintamani stone.

✦✧☾✧✦

Natalie?: I thought the people of this island would lose their cool and kick up a fuss, and what do you know? They did. You all look so stupid.

Borda Island Resident: Shut up!

Natalie?: You shut up.

Borda Island Resident: Excuse me?! …Damn, you're a cruel bitch! You think we'll let you mess with us?!

Natalie?: Hmph… …It's a good thing I gathered up the rest of those seafood crackers in the market and found their real source. What a pain. It would've been easier to just tear everything here down instead. It was pretty great forcing Bradley to eat a ton of them, though. Hehe… That was fun. … Cain's eye… …What's he doing right now? …I can sense other wizards, and… …And a sea dragon…? Tch… For crying out loud…

Borda Island Resident: Woah… The woman who was just standing here suddenly disappeared! Was she a wizard…?

✦✧☾✧✦

Nero: It's gonna be fine, Dianne. Y'just gotta show your face and talk to 'em, and the mob outside the castle gates will start settlin' down.

Castle Servant: Your Highness, ah, err, your Lordship, we will all protect you with our lives…

Dianne: I fear neither blade nor arrow!

Castle Servant: O-of course, my apologies.

Nero: Hey, simmer down a little. Can y'tell me what you are scared of?

Dianne: E… Everything…

Nero: Well, I feel ya there. Tellin' lies like that is a good way to support yourself, though. How about I say I'm actin' as your substitute, and…

Dianne: Absolutely not! As the lord of this castle, I must be the one who carries out my duties…

Nero: Then sorry, but I gotta make you go out 'n do 'em.

Dianne: …But I'm scared…

Nero: Man, there's no end to this.

Dianne: …sniff…

Nero: Ah, sorry… I went too far…

Dianne: …wahhhh…!

Castle Servant: Your Highness…! Your Highness…!!

Nero: See, it's gonna be fine, like I keep sayin'! You've got amazing charisma!

Castle Guard: Your Lordship, we have a problem! The castle gates are on the verge of breaking…!

Nero: What?! Didn't you guys tell us the crowd was gettin' smaller?

Castle Guard: W-well, all of a sudden, they've started acting like a well-trained army… It seems like someone capable of directing them has appeared. They seem to have outstanding leadership capabilities…

Nero: (Did a higher up from the merchants' guild show up?) Gotcha. I'll go check things out.

Dianne: Nero…

Nero: Don't worry. I'll be back in just a sec.

✦✧☾✧✦

Bradley: Hell yeah, brothers! Keep it up! You're all doin' great!

Borda Island Residents: Yeahhhh…!

Borda Island Resident: Mister Bradley! We've got more logs!

Bradley: Sick. Let's get 'em passed to the head of the crowd and break those gates down. Y'guys hear that?! We're gonna count down and all work together now! We're just gonna go one, two, three, got it? Let's go!

Borda Island Residents: Yeahhhh…!

Bradley: One, two, three…!

Borda Island Residents: Uwoooghhh…!

Bradley: Hell yeah! One more time! One, two, three…!

Borda Island Residents: Uwoooghhh…!

Bradley: Damn, you guys rock! One, two, three…!

Nero: …

Bradley: Yo, Nero! I was feelin' pissed off and wanderin' around the island when I heard people were attackin' the castle! Figured I'd give 'em a hand. By the time the sun rises, that castle's gonna be mine, baby! Hey, once it's mine, you should make me somethin' tasty to eat. How's that sound? Wanna help out?

Nero: Boss, can I have a sec?

Bradley: Huh?! Uh, yeah, sure…

Nero: Sorry, comin' through.

Borda Island Resident: Mister Bradley?!

Bradley: Keep goin'! We got a good thing going here!

Borda Island Residents: Yessir…!

✦✧☾✧✦

Nero: 'Kay, just need you to stand here…

Bradley: Like this?

Nero: I want you to do some work on this side, too.

Bradley: This side? You tellin' me I should be protectin' the castle instead?

Nero: Yep.

Bradley: C'mon, man. You really think I'm gonna help the establishment instead of tearin' it down?

Nero: Man, shut up. Things are already complicated enough as it is without you shovin' your face in them. The local lord's already plannin' on comin' out and givin' a public apology to everyone so we can wrap things up lickety-split.

Bradley: So why ain't she standin' here and doin' that, then? This is the best place for lookin' over the castle gate and below, ain't it? So where is she?

Nero: She's terrified, that's why. She's brand new to the whole role, so of course she is.

Bradley: Hell, of course a newbie's gonna get scared. Ain't she got anyone to kick her ass into gear?

Nero: Well…

Bradley: If there's no one, I can do it.

Nero: Hey…

Bradley: Just leave it to me, partner.

Nero: Hey, wait! Brad! You're gonna come on way too strong for her! Dammit, listen to me, Brad…!

✦✧☾✧✦

Nero: Uh, lemme introduce you… This is my…friend, Brad…ley…

Dianne: …

Bradley: Yo.

Dianne: Who is he…?

Nero: He's another of the Sage's wizards…

Bradley: I'm a Northern wizard and convict.

Dianne: …A convict…

Bradley: Thanks for the food this afternoon. Can't say it was any good, though. Sayin' that made Nero really throw a fit, though.

Dianne: Ah… I… Please let me apologize for that… I was the reason that happened. I was the one who threw the castle staff into chaos, and they were simply trying to move according to my whims.

Nero: Dianne…

Bradley: Heh. You've got a better look on your face than you did this afternoon. C'mon. Walk with me.

Dianne: Wh-where to…?

Nero: Hey, Brad…

Bradley: We're just gonna be throwin' some shit out.

Dianne: Such as? What are we throwing out? I-I… All I can do is keep asking you things. Do I seem stupid to you?

Bradley: Why would you? The ones who actually ask people about what they don't know are the smart ones. Brave, too.

Dianne: …

Bradley: We're gonna go toss that fear of yours in the trash. I'll teach you how.

Dianne: …O…okay…

Nero: Brad!

Bradley: Yo.

Nero: I'm countin' on you. Don't let me down.

Bradley: Yeah.

Nero: Hey, Dianne, if he tries to pull anything, just use some pepper…

Dianne: Pepper?

Bradley: Man, don't listen to him.

Nero: …Jeez… But, well… He's always been reliable at times like this.

Riquet: Nero! The torta di cocco is almost done!

Nero: Gotcha! Mithra's here too, right? I'll come to the kitchen right now.

Riquet: Where's Dianne?

Nero: She'll be okay. I had to go through a pretty similar rite of passage m'self.

Riquet: Huh?

Nero: Oh, uh… What about you, are you okay? Are you scared?

Riquet: No. I'm feeling just fine!

Nero: Good t' hear. Why's that?

Riquet: Because I have you and so many others watching over me.

Nero: …

Riquet: Let's go, Nero!

Nero: Yeah!

✦✧☾✧✦

Figaro: Now, to make the antidote… <Possideo> … Lord Snow… Lord White… … The antidote's been properly refined… I only need to collect as much as Lord Snow needs to drink… And then I'll save him. So please, just hold on until then, Lord Snow…

✦✧☾✧✦

Lennox?: …

Faust: What's wrong…? He stopped moving all of a sudden…

Lennox?: …!

Faust: …?!

Heathcliff: How is he doing…?! He looks just like the mermaids under Balthazar's control right now.

Shino: Heath! Focus on the circle!

Heathcliff: S-sorry!

Lennox?: …!

Faust: (What's going on?! His eyes are hollow, and he's attacking in a pattern.) (And he's not saying anything…) (Has Balthazar's control over Leno weakened?) …Leno…! Leno, it's me…!

Lennox?: …

Faust: (He stopped!) Le…

Lennox?: …!

Faust: …ghh…!

Heathcliff: …Mr. Faust…!

Shino: He stabbed Leno's key into Faust's shoulder…!

Faust: …gh, I'm fine…! Focus on the circle…

Heathcliff: Understood!

Faust: …gh… (Lennox…)

Lennox?: …

✦✧☾✧✦

Shylock: It's you…

Balthazar: …

Arthur: …A wizard that's only a head…?

Murr: No… Not just a head… His skull's wrapped up in crystal. He's connected to a huge piece of abyssal jade. It's pretty rare. I've never seen this much in one place. It can only do so much, but abyssal jade can give eternal life. It's amazing seeing it get used like this…

Balthazar: Don't touch me!

Murr: Hey, did you make this?

Balthazar: …Haha… You really think I'd make something in such poor taste as this? You think I'd tie myself to these rocks, forced to live in such a wretched state…

Murr: Hey, those "rocks" are precious gemstones! Abyssal jade is super valuable. Someone's lovingly keeping you alive. It's probably that dragon, huh?

Balthazar: …You're right.

Murr: He must like you a whoooole lot!

Shylock: Balthazar… …So you did turn to stone when you sank Adams Island. Or rather, you should have.

Arthur: You mean, that dragon saved him…?

Balthazar: …That's correct… I was kept alive without my knowledge after the island sank. According to Hwylryn, I slept for a very, very long time. But… I felt <the Great Calamity's> power, and my eyes opened again on a night illuminated by moonlight.

Shylock: …So you awoke because <the Great Calamity> drew close…

Balthazar: And yet, I was still only half awake… What finally woke me up was the sensation of Oz and another Northern wizard and the intense anger I felt from them. I swore an oath. I would acquire a body that would let me move freely, and I would have my revenge on Oz.

Arthur: So that's why you've been capturing people and beheading them…

Balthazar: Correct. But though I could join my head to their bodies with magic, it was never long before they…stopped working. But this latest one was so excellent…

Murr: Hey, Balthazar. This is just a suggestion, but. I can make a body for you. So can you let Shylock and Lennox go?

Balthazar: …You will make my body?

Murr: Sure. And then you can get up to all the vengeance you want.

Arthur: …

Balthazar: Can you really do such a thing? Shylock. Who is this person?

Shylock: …

Balthazar: Shylock.

Murr: I'm Murr!

Balthazar: …Murr… Murr…?!

Arthur: Wh-why are you getting angry?!

Murr: Shyyyylock! What did you tell him about me?!

Shylock: I spoke nothing but the truth.

Balthazar: I'll turn all of you to stone here and now! <Mare Praeda>!

Arthur: Murr, back me up! <Pernoctant Nixzo>!

Murr: <Eanul Lambru>!

Balthazar: … Get out of my sight, you worms!

Arthur: …That didn't work at all!

Murr: That's a Northern wizard for you.

Arthur: We need to hurry, or else Cain and the others will…

Balthazar: <Mare Praeda>!

Arthur & Murr: …!

Shylock: Watch out…!

Murr: …We're not going to be able to get close to Shylock like this!

Arthur: I'll draw his attention! You take care of Shylock!

Murr: Arthur?!

Arthur: Balthazar! I am Arthur Granvelle! Disciple of the Great Wizard Oz!

Balthazar: … Oz's disciple, you say…? Fascinating! I'll eat your stone and tell Oz how it tastes!

Arthur: Oh, but can you? Lord Oz's lightning is much faster than you are. Just try and catch me!

Balthazar: Hold still…!

Shylock & Murr: …

Murr: Let's hurry.

Shylock: Yes, let's. Should anything happen to Prince Arthur, Oz will turn us both to stone. Please pay no mind to my agony while you break these restraints.

Murr: Gotcha! Count down from three!

Shylock: Three…

Murr: <Eanul Lambru>!

Shylock: …gh!

Murr: Aaaand they're off! How was it? Did you pass out?

Shylock: …Why… Why didn't you wait until I'd finished counting down?

Murr: There's a theory that catching someone off guard with something icky causes less mental strain than letting them anticipate something.

Shylock: And who came up with this theory?

Murr: Me.

Shylock: Please record in your paper that I solemnly disagree. Let us be off.

Murr: Okay!

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