#AU: NEET Princess

[nevermindtheweights]

Blake had planned to sneak into the Snee family Mansion as a new servant and planning their downfall when she met the young neet heiress. Realizing it's just easier to keep her fat lazy and socially inept and their family would fall apart in the Next Generation or two

Well, strictly speaking, the heiress had been.... taken off any notion of inheritance. She held the title but only in name. Winter and Whitley were the groomed and capable members of the family and given they were not in the mansion, implied they were busy keeping the company strong and secure. With Winter as the acting head though more out of respect than practical ability, the home was probably one of the weaker areas to target.

Still, if Blake thinks her pointless plan will work, then she is more than welcome to join the ranks of the servants at the Schnee Manor.

As for Weiss Schnee herself, she was a obese pampered shut-in who could barely look at even the servants without stammering. She preferred to stay in her room, playing video games and the remaining away from everything. The family seemed to accept this too, enabling it. The siblings knew it kept Weiss out of any degree of power and Winter just wanted someone to dote on since her husband has passed. Not that she had any love lost for the man...

"..... You keep looking at me... st-stop it..." The NEET mumbled, hand on belly, dressed in sweatpants and a messy t-shirt that had a graphic from her favourite online game. "Ouurrpp.... Nngghh... G-get me... some... soda..." She added, attempting to order the faunus servant around.

[sunderwight]

SV AU where Shen Yuan transmigrates into a dragon.

It's not so bad, at first. He's an extremely magical sort of dragon so he can easily take on a humanoid shape, and he has dominion over an entire mountain, with a magical gate that leads to his palace. Said palace has a fully stocked treasury, a library, garden, etc, with the only real downsides being that the place is kind of huge and very difficult for a neet with limited housekeeping or landscaping skills to keep up with. The original dragon had enslaved a bunch of fairy spirits to do it for him, but since Shen Yuan has moral objections to that, he'd let them all go and they'd run off before he could even think to offer to hire any of them as paid employees instead. Not that he can blame them for being in a hurry to get gone.

He does his best, and generally enjoys being a dragon lazing on his mountain, or wandering the beauty of his palace and investigating the books and scrolls kept there. He doesn't actually seem to need to eat or drink, so that's not really an issue, and nobody looks keen to bother him. But after a few months the dust starts to really pile up, and trying to figure out how to do his own laundry without modern equipment leads to several disasters, and even though he doesn't need to eat he's starting to think it would be quite nice to have a fancy sit-down dinner and enjoy it for its own sake anyway. He has an enchanted larder but his food prep skills aren't up to much.

So, Shen Yuan ventures away from his mountain. He keeps to his human disguise when he's not traveling, and at first tries to hire on some help from a nearby city. But when he explains that he lives on the mountain, he realizes the difficulty, because everyone in the area knows that only the dragon lives there. So they all think he's either a liar or a fraud, or some servant of a nefarious supernatural creature angling to trick and possibly devour them.

Shen Yuan tries approaching another town in his dragon form, to see if anyone will actually deal with him if he's being upfront and honest about the situation, but the townspeople just panic. He returns to his mountain to rethink his strategies, and in the meanwhile the alarmed locals hire a swordsman to go after him. The guy gives him a few very painful cuts before Shen Yuan mostly-accidentally sends him careening into a boulder. One broken arm later the swordsman is gently persuaded that the pay he was offered isn't worth the effort on this job, and leaves.

Discouraged, Shen Yuan decides he's gonna give this one last try. He picks the second closest city, flies up, and is like yes hello, yes I am indeed a dragon, no I'm not trying to burn down your walls, yes it would be excellent if you stopped shooting arrows at me, look they don't even get past the scales? It's kind of silly? Okay, yes, thank you very much. Good. Now, the thing is, I'm looking for some people. I want to take them back to my mountain with me, to my incredibly nice palace, and -- what was that? A princess? No no I don't want a princess, what would I even do with one? If anything I'm looking for the complete opposite of a princess!

Anyway, the locals take this to mean that the dragon is demanding a sacrifice in the form of a pretty boy of no particular pedigree, and Shen Yuan takes this to mean that he's finally made his case clear and they're going to dig up someone who is willing to overlook his being a dragon in exchange for free room and board and fair wages out of his massive treasury.

SY's a bit disheartened when the entire city could only apparently turn up one such person -- an underfed teenage boy who looks at Shen Yuan like, despite the situation, he is still expecting to be eaten at any moment. Poor thing! But at least having one servant means he can potentially get more, especially if it all goes well. The lad can tell others that working for a dragon isn't so bad! Well, provided that he doesn't give up in alarm at the state of the mountain palace.

For his part, Luo Binghe at first thinks he's definitely going to get eaten, and then that this dragon is weirdly nice about planning to eat him, and then that maybe the dragon has other (even less savory!) plans for him, until finally he sees the state of the dragon's laundry and the foot-thick layer of dust in the corners, and gets completely distracted. Mortal terror forgotten, those floors should not be that filthy, Lord Dragon respectfully that isn't how anyone should prepare rice either, but oh Binghe has never seen a kitchen so nice before in his life...!

Anyway, needless to say, it works out just fine.

[zarasu]

Bingyuan AU where Bingge is a disney princess (Mbj is his animal sidekick) that keeps marrying one prince after the other. (He's also a huge bridezilla, fyi.)

But of course, he has all of these hang-ups about the princes only marrying him because they think he's perfect. They don't really love him, they're blinded by the disney princess halo!

Then, Bingge is dropped into the modern world and his disney princess halo is gone and he's an utter mess.

He's found by Shen Yuan, a lanky neet, who loves him anyway.

[wonderverse-oc-asks-blog]

Welcome To Wonderverse

Here you'll meet unique characters, others are just fun side characters.

Here's the main crew

Zero - The bastard prince of hearts, (he doesn't know he's a prince), he grew up in Artemis's lab and escaped. He loves sweets, he's kind, carefree, flirty, punny, and an absolute sweetheart.

Akarui - Is Zero's older brother, he's chill, lazy, and obsessed with ducks, he's a huge pacifist, he'll fight when he needs to but he refuses to kill and believes everyone is good deep down, the perfect big brother.

Dr. Artemis - Is a scientist who's curiosity is more dangerous than his experiments, he loves spider tea.

Karma - The God of bad luck, anyone he touches will instantly receive bad luck, that's why he keeps his gloves and magic rings on at all times, he's an asshole, but he's actually just touch starved.

Cole - He's flirty and sarcastic he has a magic deficiency and takes medication for it he's also allergic to the sun so he's sorta a neet during the day.

Elizabeth - Elizabeth is a Vampire who prefers all the fine things in life, she has a princess like additude when she's not being a spoiled brat.

Sosu - Sosu is Karma's creation he's a living doll, his main purpose was to absorb evil magic and eradicate evil for the mortals, he wanders around the au but isn't much of a talker, his ref sheet explains the rest.

Spade - Spade is known as the "Jack of Spade's" he's a mermaid and an info broker who lives on a ship where his equipment is located, he never stays in one place, he's chill, laid back, money hungry and he loves coffee.

LockHart - He used to be a scientist but is now the timeline's guardian. He's the only person (besides Karma) who remembers all the timelines, he prefers to stay out of sight and in the shadows and keeps to himself, he only meddles in the timeline when it's necessary.

He switches between these two forms, one's for combat, the other when he's speaking to others.

[meatymidnightmultiverse]

NEET AU for the regular non-time traveling Lucina growing up to become a fat belchy princess because there isn't an apocalypse to worry about~

"Sw-sword practice? Why should I worry about that? We're at peace and that means more time to instead embrace the joys of a prosperous land."

Now about that, she's going to have herself another slice of cake!

[oraclememehacker]

10. anons 17. fanon interpretations 27. an old muse

send a number for me to talk about one of the following topics!

it can be a praise, a complaint, a good memory… anything that comes to mind!

10: anons

I don't mind anons, overall really. If I did I would have disabled them a long time ago. When anons send silly stuff or send stuff that I can really work with easily it's a lot of fun. But my major issue with anons is when it gets abused. I know that's not really a shocker, I think most people have this opinion but just because you're anonymous doesn't give you the right to be an asshole with it. It's a privilege, not a right. Also I find it weird that there's these copy/paste anons who send the same asks to several people? I kinda get it but at the same time it just kind of turns me off once I realize they are doing that. Just kind of weird and makes me question the motive. But yeah, on a whole I don't mind them.

17: fanon interpretations

I love how others interpret characters, though with that said, there's a lot of crap out there and I hate when a character gets boiled down to 1 thing. You know, like how Futaba's just the neet, or Ryuji's just the dumbass, or Yusuke's just the eccentric painter, that sort of thing. And it gets really bad at times to the point where I wonder if they ever even actually played the games. But with that said, it's still fun to see others interpretations of characters. I always personally like to stick as close to canon as possible but to add my own stuff to it as it makes sense, unless it's a heavily different AU that necessitates my own interpretations that go against the grain, that sort of thing.

27: an old muse

I've said it before, but my main muse before Futaba was Twilight Sparkle from My Little Pony Friendship is magic. Kind of like the persona series, I was obsessed with this show back when it was still in it's heyday, back when you could really call yourself a brony and pegasister and people would be like "oh that's cool" before it became hated on and then people stopped caring, I think anyways. With the fact that she used magic and having it set up the right way, it was really easy to do stuff like crossovers and adventure rps and the like. It was also really easy to do story arcs and to follow a long, linear narrative. Well, the best that I could anyways. A lot that I learned from her being my main muse I still carry over to this day. As for Twilight herself, I just fell in love with her. She was a nerd, an introvert (wow, I wonder why I fell in love with Futaba. It's almost like I have a type) and just kind of a dork. I know they kinda went away from the whole introvert thing in later seasons somewhat since she became a Princess and all that, but she's still a dork and an introvert to me, but loves making friends and learning new things. My muse for her is still there, though is so different from canon it might as well be a different individual at this point. Still, I do have her as a muse on my multi-muse, but I don't follow many pony blogs these days and I don't think many people are interested in rping with a human Twilight that follows a very specific timeline with a lot of baggage attached to it. Oh well.

[vennyriz22]

Reunion in Vegas

Spoilers for Lostbelt 5-2 below

Musashi and Osakabehime dated prior to the Olympus Lostbelt where Musashi sacrificed her to seal Chaos. The NEET princess was devastated about what happened and spent the better part of a month locked away in her room not interacting with anyone. Eventually, it took time for Osakabe to come to terms with Musashi's sacrifice and tried to move on.

It's until the Vegas rerun that Musashi reappears again from the void in her Berserker form. In this AU, Musashi's Saber Saint Graph was burned from existence. However, her Saint Graph for her Berserker still remained.

[bxdraws]

NEET Blossom #6 - “The Definition of ‘Fun’ [pt. 2]

I’m gonna be honest, this page’s punchline is just a repeat of the last page, I just wanted to draw those expressions on panels 5 & 6.

[escapekissed]

who wants to do a princess jellyfish au with me... huh... whose brave enough for HIGH FASHION and NEETs and JELLYFISHES and LOVE TRIANGLES

[aranciafiamma]

The Demon Wears Neon

My Holiday Gift for @teatimeunicorpia​ for @mp100ficrec gift exchange!

Prompt:  High Fashion AU starring designer Teru

Ship: None, Kageyama Mob & Hanazawa Teruki

Summary:  Mob has been set a challenge by his parents. He needs to learn how to live on his own. Which means find a place, find a job, and then keep the job. That sounds easy enough. (No Powers AU) -Inspired by the Devil Wears Prada and Princess Jellyfish

INT. DOWNTOWN BOUTIQUE - MORNING

Stylish. Chic. Desperately trying to be bougie. Looks like the backstage of a runway, with employees that just stepped away from a photoshoot.

SHIGEO KAGEYAMA, 22, stradles the line between homely and homeless. He appears so unremarkable that he goes by a second name, MOB.

Mob loiters in front of the entrance. He looks up at the big, lit up sign and then at the job opening flyer posted on the door. He peers inside for the nth time.

The contrast between the sharply-heeled, precise-cut outfitted clerks and himself is apparent. Comparable to the way a multi-million, downtown condo contrasts an abandoned cottage in the woods. He sighs.

MOB There's no way...

He shifts his gaze down.

A shot of his scuffed-up sneakers on the concrete sidewalk.

INT. KAGEYAMA HOUSE - EVENING

Two weeks ago.

A shot of the same scuffed-up sneakers but on the laminated floor of a genkan. Shot pans up.

MRS. KAGEYAMA, middle-aged with a no nonsense look that can only be cultivated by raising two boys. She stands in front of Mob, hands on her hips.

Mob just got home, looking like he went out for a run. He's in a pair of sweatpants with a white T-shirt damp from sweat.

MOB Oh. I'm ho-

MRS. KAGEYAMA Are you doing anything tomorrow?

MOB No? I don't-

MRS. KAGEYAMA What about the next week? Or the next month? Or the next year? Do you have any plans at all?

MOB Um...

Mrs. Kageyama drags a hand down her face.

MRS. KAGEYAMA Shige. You're a grown man now. It's time you learned how to live on your own. Just look at Ritsu! Gone off to college!

MOB But you agreed college wasn't for me.

MRS. KAGEYAMA I did. That doesn't mean I wanted you to just hang around the house. You're not even working! You know, your father and I won't be here forever. We can't keep waiting for you to get moving.

MOB What does that mean?

MRS. KAGEYAMA We agreed to provide you with one month's rent. Just to get you started. Find yourself a place. Find yourself a job. It doesn't have to be anything fancy. You could work at a 7/11. I just -

Mrs. Kageyama sighs. Every year of her age seems to catch up in a single second. She looks tired and worn out, like a beloved blanket washed too many times.

MRS. KAGEYAMA We just need to know that you're going to be okay...

Mob looks down at his feet. Silence for an extended pause.

MOB That's one month?

MRS. KAGEYAMA Yes. Plenty of time, don't you think?

A front shot of Mob's face, focus on his eyes - a flat, dead-fish looking stare.

MOB Yeah... Yeah, okay.

INT. DOWNTOWN BOUTIQUE - MORNING

Same shot of Mob's eyes.

MOB This is a bad idea.

TERU Blocking the door tends to be.

A full shot. Mob jumps and whips around to see TERUKI HANAZAWA, 23, the human personification of LMFAO's "Sexy and I Know It". His personal style is disco night meets black light parties - a lot of sequins, a lot of neon. 

He peers over his bedazzled, heart-shaped sunglasses, giving Mob a once over. He is not impressed with what he sees.

TERU Well?

Mob blinks at him.

TERU (clicks tongue) Get out of the way.

Mob scrambles off to the side. Teru flounces in, his many shopping bags hit Mob on the way. Stunned, Mob dazedly follows him inside.

There's an uproar as all the store clerks swarm Teru. They take his bags, asking rapid fire questions, presenting him with products. Mob watches, swept off to the side.

ARATAKA REIGEN, 36, like a car salesman but fashionable. He strides through the crowd, holding up two belts.

REIGEN There you are, Teruki. I'm planning to change the window display. Help me pick a belt.

Both belts are teal, wide, and flat but with different buckles and base materials. To the casual onlooker, the belts appear identical.

MOB Aren't those the same belts?

A pause. All the store clerks and Reigen look at him. Mob becomes a living statue - maybe not even living - a soon to expire statue.

Slowly, dramatically, Teru turns to face Mob.

TERU Oh. The boy masquerading as a door mat.

Mob draws up his shoulders, a turtle ducking into his shell.

MOB I... There was...

He points at the job opportunity flyer. Teru frowns.

TERU I knew that flyer was a bd idea. It invites all kinds of riff raff.

MOB Puh- Please. Two weeks. Rent due. I need - That is, I can... Please.

Reigen sighs and lightly nudges Teru.

REIGEN Listen kid. We need more help. I'm sure with the right training-

Teru glances at Reigen, glances back at Mob, then gives Reigen a look that could dry up the seas in second.

TERU We aren't running a charity here. Our job candidates should at least start from rock bottom, not the inner depths of the Earth's crust.

MOB I can work very hard! An - And I can follow orders! I'll do my best to learn!

REIGEN Oh give him a chance. He can work in the back, doing inventory. No one has to see him. We really need the extra help.

TERU I heard you the first time.

REIGEN Did you.

Reigen and Teru lock eyes. A tense moment.

TERU Alright! Fine. We can take him on. Temporarily. If he messes up my shop, it's on your head.

MOB ... Wait. This is your shop?

Teru and Reigen stare blankly at him. A beat. Teru turns to Reigen with a grin that could put a laughing Buddha to shame.

TERU Good luck, Arataka. You are going to need it.

Teru walks away with a dramatic spin on his heel. His staff follow after him like particularly noisy chickadees - chirping out new questions and suggestions.

Reigen and Mob both watch them go. A pause. Reigen looks over to find Mob preoccupied with a nearby sweater. His fingers run over the smooth cashmere in a repetitive rhythm.

REIGEN (clears throat) Alright, kid. I just stuck my neck out for you. Don't let me down.

Mob blinks. His eyes got that thousand yard stare. Reigen's brow twitches.

REIGEN Geez. You really make a guy feel confident about his choices. What's your name?

MOB Shigeo Kageyama. My friends call me Mob.

REIGEN Like a mob boss?

MOB Like a mob character.

REIGEN .... Right. I'm Arataka Reigen.

Mob nods. A long, stretched out pause. They stare at each other.

MOB Oh. Thank you. And please excuse me but, why did you do that?

REIGEN What? Help you out? Listen, a new stock of our famous Jellyfish couture just came in. It's a massive order. I could either go crazy doing it by myself OR we could hire you to give me a hand. Now come on.

Reigen walks away, beckons Mob to follow. Mob stays put.

MOB We're starting now?

Reigen doesn't even pause or glance back.

REIGEN Why? You got other stuff to do?

Mob stumbles after him, trying to catch up.

INT. CRYPTID APARTMENT - EVENING

Messy, cluttered, obviously occupied by more than one twenty something. Anime merch scattered on every surface. Sci-fi posters plastered on the walls. A roach sets out from the Take Out Box street and visits its cousin in Candy Wrapper lane.

TOME KURATA, 24, self-identifies as a cryptid but actually she's just a NEET. She's camped out on the living room floor, playing a console game.

Mob enters. He looks like the patient of a medieval doctor - as in someone stuck a bunch of leeches on him and now he's nothing more than a husk of a human being.

TOME Ossu! How'd the job hunting go?

MOB ... I got one.

Tome pauses her game and faces him.

TOME Nice! Did you - Woah! What happened to you?

Mob doesn't answer. He shuffles over to the couch and faceplants on it. He is dead now.

Fade to black.

TOME Mob? Oi, Mob! Mobbu-kun!

INT. CRYPTID APARTMENT - AFTERNOON

Two weeks ago.

Blackout.

TOME Mob?

Fade in. An unimpressed Tome stands with her arms crossed. She looks Mob up and down.

TOME What kind of name is that?

Full shot. MAMETA INUKAWA, 22, vaguely resembles a Shiba Inu. He's standing next to Mob, a hand clapped on his shoulder. They're both facing Tome.

INUKAWA Oh it's just something we liked to call him.

MOB My name is Shigeo Kageyama. It's pleasure to meet you.

TOME Huh. I'm Tome Kurata.

MOB Oh. That's my grandmother's name.

TOME Neat. So. Our last roommate fucked off without paying in advance. We're really in a bind here. I'm not even asking for the full payment just half.

MOB Yes. I can pay. But I need a room.

TOME Pfft! If you keep paying, you keep staying. Just don't murder us all in our sleep. And for the love of all things holy, wash your fucking dishes after you eat. That's all.

MOB I can manage that.

TOME Excellent. Welcome to the Cryptid Den, Mob-kun.

MOB Uh... Cryptid?

INUKAWA Because we're all hopeless shut-ins who barely scrape by on night-shift part-time work. So, seeing us is like sighting a cryptid - you know, Big Foot, Nessie...

TOME BZT! Wrong! We're cryptids because we all have a mysterious allure!

INUKAWA Oh. I thought that was just the smell from your unwashed bras.

Tome shrieks wordlessly and flails at him.

A torso shot of Mob, standing in front of the door.

INT. CRYPTID APARTMENT - EVENING

The same shot of Mob, sitting at the dining table. The rest of his roommates have trudged out of their self-imposed isolation. They're eating take-out sushi.

SARUTA SHIRIHIKO, 22, big, broad, and butt-chinned. He casually steals sushi from Inukawa's plate. HARUTO KIJIBAYASHI, 24, always looks stressed out but it's just his resting face. He laughs as Inukawa thumps Shirihiko.

Mob focuses on carefully dipping a roll into soy sauce.

Tome walks in, carrying a pack of beer. She thumps it on the table before taking a seat.

TOME Right, boys. I don't have to remind you. But I'm still gonna so don't you give me any excuses later. Rent is due in two weeks. That is 14 days. Got it? Mob, you listening?

Mob lifts his head. His roll slips from his chopsticks and splashes soy sauce on him. He flinches and reaches for a napkin. He pats himself down.

A pause. Everyone is waiting for him to respond. Distantly, the front door can be heard opening.

RITSU KAGEYAMA, 21, a Hot Mess pretending to be the Cool Guy. He walks in.

Tome clears her throat. Mob returns his attention to her.

MOB Ah. Yes. I heard. I can pay on time. I have a job now.

RITSU Really, Nii-san? Congratulations!

Ritsu grabs a beer and takes a seat next to Mob. Tome eyes him.

TOME Oi, Kageyama. If you keep coming around here, and I'll start charging you for rent.

RITSU Please, Kurata-san. I am a poor college student. I don't have a penny to my name.

INUKAWA What's the job? Where at?

MOB So far it's been managing inventory. At some place called Teru.

KIJIBAYASHI Whoa. Wait. Teru?

RITSU Do you like it?

MOB Mmmm... I have a lot to learn. It's very tiring.

TOME Yeah. You looked half-dead when you got in today.

Ritsu frowns, gripping his beer can hard enough to dent.

RITSU Well. Don't work too hard.

MOB I'll be fine. You don't need to worry about me.

RITSU Just promise me if you get too stressed out-

KIJIBAYASHI I can't believe you're working at Teru!

INUKAWA Why is that such a big deal?

KIJIBAYASHI It's like super popular! The store owner is supposedly some kinda fashion prodigy.

SHIRIHIKO And how do you know this?

KIJIBAYASHI My girlfriend. She's all about this kinda stuff.

TOME Hold up! When the hell did you get a girlfriend?

The rest give Kijibayashi hell. Ritsu turns his attention to Mob.

RITSU If it gets too much, you can always quit.

MOB I know. But I really do need money.

RITSU I can talk to Mom. I can convince her to let you come home. You don't need to put yourself through this.

MOB Mom's busy taking care of Dad. He's still on medical leave, you know?

RITSU Still?

MOB ... I want to do my best.

Ritsu scowls and takes an angry sip of his beer.

Tome has moved to throwing pizza crusts at Kijibayashi and Shirihiko. Inukawa is in tears from laughing.

RITSU If you need anything-

MOB Ritsu. It's fine. (beat) And you need to stop checking up on me. I know you're busy with college.

RITSU (sighs) Okay, Nii-san. Okay.

INT. DOWNTOWN BOUTIQUE - MORNING

Mob enters. The boutique is in a frenzy. Store clerks run about blindly. Teru is at the center of all the mayhem. He's fixing up a mannequin, paying little attention to the panic.

TSUYOSHI EDANO, 24, stuck in his "high school punk" phase but now in a suit. He stands next to Teru, taking notes.

TERU Details of your incompetence do not interest me. Tell Simone I'm not going to approve that girl she sent me. I asked for clean, athletic, smiling. She sent me dirty, tired, and paunchy.

Reigen appears next to Mob. He grabs his arm. Mob jumps.

REIGEN You're late!

MOB I... But... You told me to come at 8am. It's 8am.

REIGEN Clearly I meant to come 15 minutes earlier. That's how it works around here.

Reigen pulls Mob through the store. Mob watches the store clerks rush around.

MOB Is it always like this?

REIGEN Just the Teru effect. But he's in fine form today. The shop isn't even open yet and he's already sent someone crying.

Mob blinks, slightly frowning.

REIGEN I wouldn't worry about it. Your job is out of his way. Unlike mines.

MOB If you don't mind me asking, what is your job?

REIGEN Mostly I handle the daily operations of the shop. But I'm also the event planner. Teruki puts on fashion shows, you see. It's what all those fancy brands - Gucci, Prada, Versace - they all do it. And that kid, well he believes himself on par with them. So of course whatever they do, he will too. Never mind that they've got more resources and reach. So he's just stressing himself out for not much pay off. And of course, us underlings get the brunt of his freak outs - I'm ranting, aren't I? Don't mind me, kid.

MOB I wasn't. I didn't get... any of that.

They enter the backroom. It looks like the kind of place where simple joys die slow, drawn out deaths. No windows. Buzzing, overhead lights. A small mountain of unopened boxes next to a second door. Rows and rows of shelves and racks, most empty. Not a lot of breathing room.

Reigen glances over at Mob.

REIGEN Mob, right? Just do as I say and we should get along fine.

Mob stares at Reigen.

REIGEN Think you can do that?

MOB Oh. Yes.

REIGEN Good. Now, where did I leave off yesterday...

INT. DOWNTOWN BOUTIQUE - MONTAGE

Mob hard at work. He's carrying a huge box. He can't see where he's going. He bumps into a store clerk who stumbles back, knocking over a set of mannequins. There's a deafening crash. Reigen comes running over.

REIGEN Mob!

Reigen carefully jotting down the inventory. He double checks to make sure they received everything. Behind him, Mob unpacks a few boxes. He pauses for a moment, wiping his brow. He notices an electric fan in the corner - it's huge, industrial sized. He switches it open. The sudden breeze sends all of Reigen's files flying.

REIGEN Mob!!

Mob walks in, carrying a tray of tea. He trips over his feet and sends the drinks flying, headed right for the unwrapped stock of very expensive cashmere skirts. Reigen yells and makes a mad dash. In slow motion - like watching a hardened soldier take a bullet for a fallen comrade - Reigen steps in and shields the skirts from the tea splash.

MOB ... Oops.

Reigen now dripping wet.

REIGEN MOB!!!

EXT. BACK ALLEY - AFTERNOON

A cramped area behind the boutique. Largely bare. Only a recycling bin full of flattened boxes, a mostly empty trash bin, and Mob.

He squats next to the door. He picks at a store-bought bento.

MOB (sighs) Man. I suck at this.

Door swings violently open. It knocks into Mob, upturning his bento and spilling the food all over him.

Teru enters.

MOB ... Ow.

Teru glances over and sees him.

TERU You know, if I had wanted a doormat, I could have bought a perfectly serviceable one at a department store. It would have been better looking too.

Mob focuses on brushing the food off him.

TERU Hello? I'm talking to you.

Mob slowly lifts his head and turns to Teru.

TERU Are you deaf?

MOB No.

TERU Then why didn't you say anything?

MOB Was I supposed to?

TERU Sorry would be a good start.

MOB But... You're the one that hit me... With the door...

Teru turns away from him. He pulls out his phone and a cigarette. He starts a call, puffing out smoke.

Mob gets up, throws away his bento, and enters the boutique.

INT. DOWNTOWN BOUTIQUE - AFTERNOON

Mob walks into the backroom. Reigen is using a box for a desk, scribbling fast. He sees Mob and turns to him.

REIGEN Whoa. Did you eat lunch or did lunch eat you?

MOB I-

REIGEN Yeah, yeah. Listen. Kid. This isn't gonna work.

MOB What won't?

REIGEN You are just constantly in the way. I can't believe you've stayed on. You're clearly not cut out for this. You should quit.

A pause. Mob shakes his head slowly. He scratches at his arm.

MOB ... No.

Another pause, drawn out. Reigen studies him.

REIGEN This is a fashion boutique. Employees should have an interest in fashion. Which you don't.

MOB I can learn.

REIGEN Who's going to teach you? Because I just don't have the time.

Mob scratches his arm faster.

MOB Give me - Give me one more chance. I need to work. I can't - Mom and Dad - tired of disappointing.

A pause.

Teru enters with his usual dramatic flair.

TERU Reigen, I need coffee.

REIGEN I'm busy, brat.

TERU Then get your little errand boy to do it. Isn't that why we hired him?

Mob stops scratching his arm. He balls his hands into fists.

MOB I can do it!

TERU You don't have a choice. I want a triple grande caramel macchiato in a venti cup, 1/2 whole milk, 1/2 almond milk, a splash of soy, double the amount of vanilla syrup, caramel wall in the cup, extra whip. Understood?

Mob did not understand.

MOB Y-Yes.

TERU Then what are you standing around for? Go!

INT. STARBUCKS - AFTERNOON

No place special. Just somewhere to get the usual caffeine fix.

Mob stands at the counter. A hand furiously scratches at his arm. He stares at the menu. Seen from his point of view, the menu starts to blur into an unreadable mess.

ICHI MEZATO, 22, the love child of Sherlock Holmes and Lois Lane. She mans the register, eyeing Mob. A line is forming behind him.

MEZATO Hey! I know you! Don't you work at Teru?

Mob jumps. He stops scratching.

MOB Ho-How did you know?

MEZATO I stopped by this morning and saw you knock a store clerk into those mannequins. Man, that was funny. Lemme guess. You're here for the bossman.

Mob nods.

MEZATO I gotchu. He always gets the same thing. I've memorized the order by now.

MOB That's... convenient.

MEZATO Hey, don't question your luck. It seems like a stressful place to work at. You're gonna need all the help.

MOB Thank you...

Mob squints at her name tag.

MOB Mezato-san?

MEZATO That will be 400 yen.

Mob freezes.

MEZATO ... He didn't give you money, did he?

Mob mournfully pulls out his wallet, sighing.

INT. DOWNTOWN BOUTIQUE - EVENING

Mob enters. Teru dashes over. Reigen stays standing at the register. He watches them.

TERU Finally! What took you so long? I thought you died or something!

MOB Please excuse me.

Mob hands the coffee to Teru. He eyes the cup suspiciously before taking a sip.

TERU Hmph. I suppose that will do.

Teru turns around and flounces away. Reigen walks up to Mob.

REIGEN That brat always orders the most elaborate stuff. I'm surprised you managed it. So you can follow instructions, huh?

MOB Yes.

REIGEN Alright. I can give you one more shot at this. But if you mess up, that's it.

INT. CRYPTID APARTMENT - EVENING

Mob and Ritsu sit on the couch. Tome and Inukawa play some sort of dancing game. They are both obviously out of shape.

RITSU How's work?

MOB It's going okay.

RITSU Not too stressful?

A pause. Mob keeps his eyes on the game. Ritsu watches him.

MOB I'm handling it.

Ritsu says nothing.

A beat. Mob yawns. He stretches and the sleeves slip down. His arms have raw-red scratch marks. Ritsu grabs Mob.

RITSU What is this?

MOB Don't worry about it.

RITSU Nii-san! This job is obviously awful. Please quit. I can loan you some money. You don't need -

MOB I need to be treated like a grown up. I'm the older brother. I should be taking care of you not...

RITSU I don't need to be taken care of.

MOB Then at least let me take care of myself. I'm not quitting.

RITSU But-

MOB Drop it, Ritsu.

Tome and Inukawa finally collapse from overexertion.

INT. DOWNTOWN BOUTIQUE - MORNING

A week later.

Mob and Reigen are in one of the dressing rooms. Reigen is carefully outfitting Mob with some of the store's best-sellers.

MOB Um... Reigen-san.

Reigen buttons up a smart-looking vest. It's very tight. Mob scratches at the seams. His posture has gotten very tense.

REIGEN What, Mob?

MOB Do you really think I'm ready to work at the front?

REIGEN Nope. But if you stay working in the back with me, I might just go completely insane.

Mob deflates.

REIGEN I'm just kidding. You've really gotten better.

Reigen winds a tie around his neck. Mob squirms, trying to loosen it. Reigen knocks his hand away.

REIGEN Stop that.

MOB Is all this stuff really necessary?

REIGEN Unfortunately. Teruki doesn't let anyone on the floor unless they're looking runway ready. It's part of the hashtag-aesthetic.

MOB I don't know what that means.

REIGEN Same, kid.

Reigen claps Mob on the shoulders. He spins him around to face the mirror.

A full shot of his reflection. It's still Mob, with his bland-looking face and his severe-looking haircut. But his clothes are well-fitted and the dark colors complement his skin tone. He looks... well, pretty nice actually. Mob puffs up, smiling a bit

REIGEN There, now. All you gotta do is keep the racks stocked and the shelves organized. We're not throwing you behind the register or anything. So don't worry. But you should be familiar with what we carry. Right?

MOB Um...

REIGEN Say yes.

MOB Yes.

REIGEN Good. Now get out there.

Reigen shoves Mob out of the dressing room. There's a cart full of stock waiting for him. He blinks and stares at it.

REIGEN Take that to the front. You can figure out where to put it all.

Mob jumps and jerks into action. His movements are stiff, almost robotic. He wheels the cart into the crowded sales floor. Store clerks are buzzing about, flitting from customer to customer.

Mob watches them all and idly tugs at his tie, scratching his neck. He nearly crashes into a customer.

CUSTOMER Hey! Watch it!

MOB Sorry - Excuse me!

Mob hastily drags the cart over to a corner, breathing fast and hard. Both hands reach up to his neck, digging his nails in and scratching hard - leaving the skin an angry red.

A pause. Mob inhales deeply and faces the sales floor again. He looks at the cart then at the racks and starts heading out.

The chatter of the customers and clerks steadily grow louder. Mob scratches at the seams of his vest. He rocks on his heels as he hangs up some of the stock.

A store clerk passes by, casually re-applying perfume. Mob doubles over, clapping a hand over his nose and mouth.

A pulse can be heard - it's Mob. At first, just a steady beat hidden under all the noise. But slowly deafens everything else. Close up on the customers lips - smiling and talking away. Close up on the display lights, blindingly bright and everywhere. Close up on the vest's material, the starchy woven fabric embroidered with gold thread.

A full shot of Mob. He appears completely frozen. The cart is off to the side, abandoned.

A customer approaches.

CUSTOMER Hey, excuse me. But I'm looking for a cashmere skirt. It's part of your fall line, I think. Could you help me?

A hand reaches out and gently nudges Mob's shoulder. Mob flinches away - as if electrocuted. He slaps away the hand and snarls at the customer. He looks ready to go apeshit.

A beat.

CUSTOMER Um. What the he-

Mob dashes away. He tugs off the tie, flinging it away. It hits Reigen, dealing with a customer nearby. He turns.

REIGEN Ow! Hey, who threw tha - Mob?

Mob exits the sales floor.

INT. EMERGENCY ROOM - NIGHT

Five weeks ago.

Whitewashed walls, sterile-tiled floors. Buzzing flourescent lights. A crossbreed between a lab and a holding cell.

Mob is curled up on a chair. He scratches his ears. Mrs. Kageyama paces, wringing her hands. Ritsu enters, dashing in.

RITSU How is he?

Mrs. Kageyama stops pacing.

MRS. KAGEYAMA Oh, Ritsu! You didn't need to come all this way!

RITSU Didn't?! Dad just had a stroke! How can you -

A pause. Ritsu breathes in deeply. He looks over at Mob. He approaches cautiously.

RITSU Hey, Nii-san. You okay?

Mob doesn't answer. He doesn't even glance at Ritsu.

MRS. KAGEYAMA Oh don't bother him. When your father collapsed, I thought to faint myself. Must've seemed worse for Shige.

RITSU And is Dad...?

A pause. Mrs. Kageyama slowly shakes her head. A sob bursts out. Ritsu rushes over and drapes an arm around her.

Close up on Mob. Mrs. Kageyama can be heard crying in the background. He squeezes his eyes shut, gripping his knees hard.

INT. KAGEYAMA HOUSE - EVENING

Three weeks ago.

Mob stands at the entry way. He's dressed in a pair of sweats and a white T-shirt.

MR. KAGEYAMA, middle aged, stooped over from years of hard work and a very recent hospitalization. He is escorted in by Ritsu. They pass by Mob.

MR. KAGEYAMA I can walk just fine. You're making me feel old, son.

RITSU You are old, Dad.

MR. KAGEYAMA Yes. But you shouldn't say it.

Mob watches them disappear into the kitchen. Mrs. Kageyama enters, stuffing her wallet into her purse.

MRS. KAGEYAMA Shige, if you've got time to be gawking, then you should be setting out the plates for dinner. You did order the take-out like I asked, did-

Mob pushes past her, kicking off his slippers and shoving on his sneakers.

MRS. KAGEYAMA Shige? What - You're going out? Now?

Mob remains silent. His expression is the most serious seen. He dashes out the door.

MRS. KAGEYAMA Shige!

EXT. STREET - CONTINUOUS

Empty. Rows of unlit houses cage in the lane. The sky is a heartbreaking purple.

Mob runs. He runs and he runs and he runs. His face is a rictus of pain as he draws sharp, short breaths. He stumbles a little but quickly regains his footing. He keeps running.

A shot of a streetlight, flickering on.

EXT. BACK ALLEY - EVENING

Close up on a streetlight.

Pan out. Mob leans against the wall.

He's pulling off the vest, rocking on his heels. His breathing is fast and short. He frantically scratches everywhere.

Reigen enters. He's got the tie hooked around a finger. He watches Mob.

REIGEN I'm guessing you didn't like the fit?

Mob doesn't answer. He's crumpled up the vest in his hands, squeezing tightly. Reigen winces.

A long drawn out pause.

REIGEN So. How long are you gonna stay out here?

Mob stops scratching.

REIGEN Just ran out the door. Honestly. You scared a customer.

Mob slowly turns to Reigen.

REIGEN You're really bad at this. Dunno why you stick around. It's not a good fit for you.

Mob blinks.

REIGEN ... Just finish out the rest of this week. Then, you can get paid and go.

Mob shakes his head. He turns to face the wall, inhales deeply. A beat.

MOB I want to work. I can. I have to. I'm - I want to stop running.

REIGEN Okay... Why...?

MOB Be-Because I need to prove I can.

REIGEN To who?

MOB To myself. That I can grow. And I'm going to be fine. And if I - if I just work hard enough...

A pause. Reigen hisses out a breath.

REIGEN Right. Well you don't need to kill yourself in the process. Look, you've scratched your neck into bleeding.

MOB Happens. Been trying not to scratch so much.

REIGEN Okay. So how about this. Let's go back to managing the inventory for a bit. And then... Well, if you still really want to, we can ease you into the front.

MOB But wasn't this the easy job?

REIGEN Then I guess we'll have to make it easier.

A pause. Reigen studies Mob.

REIGEN Are you absolutely sure? You don't have to. You can get a job that isn't retail.

Mob doesn't answer. Again he faces the wall and holds his hands, trying not to scratch.

MOB My parents. They never... When they first found out I had autism, they never treated it like a big deal. They just went - "Ah, okay." They never stopped me from doing what I wanted to do. (beat) They honestly believe in me. That I can take care of myself. I want to - I want to believe it too.

Then Mob glances at Reigen and smiles.

MOB And. You know. Not a lot of options for part-timers with no work experience. I can do this.

Reigen barks out a laugh, shaking his head. He spins the tie around his finger.

REIGEN Then let's get started.

INT. DOWNTOWN BOUTIQUE - EVENING

Two days later.

The boutique is closed. The store clerks have fled. Reigen and Teru argue loudly. They stand by the registers. A cup of coffee on the counter.

Mob enters, carrying several shopping bags.

TERU I don't understand why it's so difficult to confirm an appointment!

REIGEN But I did confirm last night!

Teru notices Mob at the door.

TERU Who are you? The store is closed! Can't you see the sign?

MOB Oh but -

REIGEN He works with me, remember? Helps out in the stock room? I just sent him to pick up some scarves for your little fashion show.

TERU And it took him this long to come back? What happened? Did he get into an accident?

MOB I got lost.

TERU You got lost. He got lost. Okay you know what. Get out. I already sent everyone home but you - you won't be returning.

MOB ... What does that -

REIGEN Hey, don't pick on him! He's trying his best!

TERU His best clearly isn't good enough. I expect nothing short excellence.

Teru gifts Reigen with a sneer that threatened to melt the flesh from his face.

TERU And there's seems to be a shortage of that around here!

A pause. Reigen shakes his head.

REIGEN That's it. I'm done. Come find me when you're finished throwing your tantrum.

TERU Find you? I'm firing you!

REIGEN Is that right?

TERU I'm the boss around here! Seems like you forgot!

REIGEN Just never figured you to be an idiot. Stupid sometimes sure. But not an idiot. Have fun trying to figure everything without me!

TERU Fine!

REIGEN Fine!

Reigen storms out, exiting through the backroom.

A pause. Teru sees Mob watching.

TERU And what are you looking at? Huh? Yet another mistake of his. Didn't I tell you to leave? You're fired too.

MOB That was mean. He was only trying to help.

TERU Didn't you hear me? You're fired.

MOB I heard you. And... And I don't care. All Reigen-san has ever done is help you. He works overtime trying to put together your fashion show. But you just keep yelling at him. That's not right.

TERU Who are you to lecture me? Get out!

MOB You go around yelling at people and for what? Why do that? It doesn't actually help anything except maybe make you feel better. That's not - You can't just lash out.

TERU Watch me.

Teru picks up the coffee and flings it at Mob. He ducks. The coffee splashes across the front doors.

MOB Hey! That's dangerous! You'll ruin the clothes!

TERU Those are my clothes! And I'll ruin all of it if I please!

Teru pulls out a pair of scissors from the counter. He picks up a skirt and proceeds to cut it into pieces.

TERU You think you're better than me. Is that it? Is that why you keep lecturing me? As if I'm some poor, retarded child.

Mob balls his hands into fists.

MOB That's enough.

Teru picks up shirt and slices it into ribbons.

TERU When really, between the two of us, whose the real retard here? Hmm?

MOB Shut up.

TERU You think I didn't know? Please. I know everything that goes on inside my little shop. You almost lost me a customer.

MOB I said shut up.

TERU If I wasn't so busy, I would have fired you earlier.

Mob screams. He throws the shopping bags at Teru. Some fall halfway. Some miss. But one hits Teru right in the face.

A pause. Teru turns to Mob, a truly ugly grimace on his face.

TERU You!

Teru grips the scissors like a knife and lunges at Mob. He jerks back, hands catching Teru's. There's a struggle for dominance. Snip.

Snip?

Both freeze. They eye as a huge chunk of Teru's hair falls between them.

A long pause.

Teru lets out a heart-wrenching wail. He drops the scissors. Hands reach up, clutching at his now very uneven hair do.

MOB ... I'm sorry...

Teru falls to the floor. He curls up into a ball, shivering.

TERU It's over. I'm ruined. I'm done. Finished. A washed-up has-been.

MOB You can still fix it. Just even it out. Maybe.

Teru finally lifts his head. Tears and snot stream down his blotchy-red face.

TERU You don't get it! How could you? Living your dull, ugly life.

MOB You're not much better looking.

A pause. Teru blinks at him.

TERU Excuse me?

MOB You look the same as everyone else. To me, at least. It's good that you wear all those neon clothes. Or else I wouldn't know it was you.

A beat. Teru starts laughing. He laughs long and hard. The laughter turns into soft sobbing. Mob watches, unsure what to do.

TERU You're face blind? Of course you are. What is a god to a nonbeliever?

MOB ... Should I call an ambulance? Are you... okay?

TERU No, I am not. I've been arranging this stupid fashion show, when I don't have anything to show. I try and I try to design. But nothing comes. Hey, what do you think I'm doing wrong?

A pause.

TERU Look at me. Asking help from a -

MOB I can't wear any of your clothes. And I always thought it was a bit unfair... If only certain people can wear your clothes and others can't.

TERU That's just how the world works. It caters only to the special ones - those gifted with beauty and talent. Like moi.

MOB I don't know who moi is, but they can't be very special. And if you're just following what the world does... Then aren't you just like everyone else?

Another pause. Longer this time, softer. Teru looks at Mob, really looks at him.

TERU ... I'm sorry I called you... Well, you know what I called you.

MOB Yes. I'm still angry about that.

TERU Right. As you should be. I would like to... I don't mean to sound presumptive, but I'd like to earn your forgiveness - if I may!

MOB ... How?

TERU Well, first. You're definitely not fired.

MOB And Reigen-san?

TERU He isn't either. In fact, I'm giving you two some very important jobs.

Mob eyes Teru warily.

INT. CAFE - AFTERNOON

A popular hangout for college kids. Mismatched decor, worn out furniture, posters for open mic night. Currently crowded.

Teru and Ritsu sit together.

TERU Model for me, mon chéri.

RITSU I’m sorry. You want my brother to... what?

TERU Really. It's that simple.

RITSU ... And we are talking about my brother, right? Kageyama Shigeo?

TERU Do you have any more brothers?

RITSU Look... I... Can you just explain? Why him?

TERU Why is this so unbelievable? Do you not think he can be a model?

Ritsu flinches as if struck.

RITSU That’s-

TERU Well, if you really don’t understand.

RITSU Okay, you know what-

TERU I've worked with many top-class models. As I'm sure you know.

RITSU I didn't, actu-

TERU I'm used to certain standards of beauty. And your brother... failed to meet any.

RITSU So why -

TERU And I admit, upon first glance, I practically dozed off with how utterly dull he looks.

RITSU Hey now -

TERU But then! Oh but then! My eyes were opened! I was enlightened! Your brother has a certain... Mmmm... Je ne sais quoi...

Ritsu thumps his fist on the table.

RITSU Enough with the French! I get it! You're very cultured!

TERU Oh grazie.

Ritsu gifts him with a stare that could peel paint. Teru replies with a smile that could withstand a nuclear meltdown.

RITSU Alright, listen Hanazawa. I watch my brother very carefully. And ever since he started working with you, he's been more stressed out than ever. He's scratched himself hard enough to scar.

TERU I've been told that he's gotten better at that.

RITSU He shouldn't be working at your place. You need to fire him.

Teru studies Ritsu.

TERU ... You approached me to say this? Shouldn't you be convincing your brother to quit? Wouldn't that be easier?

RITSU Don't you think I've tried? He won't budge.

TERU Then why should I fire him? He's willing.

RITSU But he's not able! Surely you've noticed by now. My brother has... special needs.

A pause.

TERU I think your brother is perfectly capable of assessing his own limits.

RITSU And I think you just want to use him for your little scheme.

Teru's smile widens. He gets to his feet.

TERU Oh please, mon frére. None of my schemes have ever been little.

Teru exits.

Ritsu grits his teeth. Close up on his pained expression.

EXT. STREET - AFTERNOON

12 years ago.

Same shot of Ritsu's pained expression, now a 9 year old kid. He's got a cut on his head. It's bleeding profusely. He's watching a 10 year old Mob, currently in the middle of a meltdown.

RITSU Nii-san... Stop...

Mob is throwing rocks and beer bottles and whatever else he can get his hands on. He is screaming furiously and helplessly.

RITSU Please stop.

A bunch of older middle-school boys flee from him.

RITSU Stop!

Mob drags his hands down his arms. Scratching heavily. He curls into a ball.

A shot of Ritsu, squeezing his eyes shut.

INT. CAFE - AFTERNOON

Close up on Ritsu, eyes squeezed shut. He runs a hand down his face. He breathes out.

A pause.

He looks out the cafe window. He blinks. He sits up.

Pan over. Seen from Ritsu's point of view, Teru exits the cafe and dashes over to Mob, waiting across the street. They walk away together. Mob has his usual blank expression but he nods occassionally.

RITSU Nii-san... What are you up to?

INT. TERU'S WORKSHOP - MONTAGE

Mob and Teru bent over the drafting table. Teru presents some fabric swatches. Mob feels each one, giving feedback. Teru listens very carefully.

A dressform. A shirt mockup pinned to it. Mob attaches a sleeve. He looks back at Teru and gets a thumbs up.

Mob runs his fingers over a swatch of fabric. He takes in the dressform with its mostly assembled outfit. Teru approaches from behind, carrying two cups of tea. Mob accepts his. They both turn to look at the dressform.

Close up on the outfit. It's an elegant piece, made of soft material with no visible seams. It has a low-hemline, with long sleeves and a loose turtleneck collar. A blazer is draped on top and pair of loose, square cut pants. It looks appropriate for the office or a night out.

TERU I think we did a pretty good job.

Mob nods. A pleased smile.

INT. BACKSTAGE - EVENING

Chaos. Well-ordered chaos. Models are putting on their clothes, getting their make up done, being fussed over by Reigen. They all start lining up, ready for the runway.

Behind a dressing screen. Only Teru's and Mob's shadows can be seen. Teru is helping Mob put on the outfit they made.

TERU You can back out right now. I don't mind. I've treated you badly and I'd deserve it if you -

MOB I don't care about that. Not right now, at least.

TERU You're right. You're absolutely right. This is all about you. Mob, what do you want?

MOB I want to do this. I can.

TERU You can. You practiced. We did that dress rehearsal. This is your style. Own it.

A pause. Mob's shadow looks at Teru's.

MOB No more running.

TERU No more running. Now we strut.

Reigen rushes over. He's tapping at his watch.

REIGEN Teruki! Showtime!

INT. STAGE - EVENING

It's a packed room. People are seated on 3 sides of the catwalk. Bright lights render them all faceless. Lots of indistinct chatter.

Close up on the Cryptids. They're all seated together. Pan over to Mezato, seated off to the side.

Close up on Mr. and Mrs. Kageyama seated with Ritsu. They have a front row view. Mrs. Kageyama holds onto both her husband's and son's hands.

Teru walks on. Everyone hushes.

TERU Hello, everyone. Thank you for coming tonight. This collection gave me the hardest time. I had an artistic block. And then someone wise - much wiser than me - gave me a push in the right direction. I'd like to say this is my night. But it's not. My collaborator is the true heart and soul of this show. He focused on clothing for those with sensory issues. He forced me to think outside of my usual parameters. And if I am very lucky, I hope to continue working with him for a long, long time. (beat) Now you didn't come here for me to monologue at you. Let's start the show.

Teru steps off the stage. The models start walking out. The music is lively. The clothes are beautiful. Everyone murmurs appreciatively with each new piece. The music changes. The lights dim.

INT. BACKSTAGE - EVENING

REIGEN Alright, Mobbu. It's your turn.

Reigen turns around. Mob is out of the shot. But Reigen clearly likes what he sees.

REIGEN Go get 'em, kiddo.

INT. STAGE - EVENING

Mob walks on. He's wearing that elegant outfit. He looks confident. His shoulders are squared. His chin is lifted. He steps with grace and care and just that touch of attitude. At the catwalk's end, he strikes a simple pose - hands loose and free at his sides. His usual neutral expression shifts to allow a small smirk. Then he spins around and walks back down.

The Cryptids cheer wildly. The Kageyamas cheer wildly. The rest of the crowd follow their example. There's roaring applause.

The music quiets. The crowd slowly stops clapping. Teru retakes the stage.

TERU Please give it up for my excellent collaborator! Shigeo Kageyama!

A beat. The crowd claps. No one comes out. Teru glances over his shoulder.

Mob gets visibly pushed back on stage. He almost stumbles but manages to hide it by taking a wide step. He repeats his walk down to Teru, no less confident. A wide grin now obvious on his face.

The two face the crowd. They bow. Cheers fill the room.

THE END.

[osokaraddict]

Osokara Zine Entries + AN Notes

This is super late but who cares! I wrote for the first time and had lots of fun collaborating with Noriko in the Osokara Zine (please have a read here if you haven’t already!)

I did a total of four entries (ノ°▽°)ノ 

But the Rose was Completely Unharmed Summary: AU - Magic Teacher x Magical Girl; Professor Osomatsu thinks his student is an idiot. His student begs to differ and calls himself the Guilto Warrior of Love™.

Earl Grey, with a Teaspoon of Blue Flowers Summary: AU - Teacup Spirit x Teru Teru Doll; a (not) lonely teacup spirit meets a white spirit by the window.

Rain, with Signs of Drowning Summary: R15 - NEETS;  According to Osomatsu, humans are made out of 80 or 90 percent out of water; Karamatsu thinks his older brother should get his head checked by a doctor.

Matsuno Karamatsu’s Ingenious Plan  Summary: R18 - NEETs; Karamatsu thinks he has a greatest plan in the world; Osomatsu’s head is hurting.

Nori and I also did a bonus entry that missed the deadline. Please have a read if you are interested! (۶•̀ᴗ•́)۶

Feast and Indulgence Summary: R18 - AU - Shuten Douji x Dark!Aoandon; The oni's nature is to pillage, indulge, and feast to their heart's content. This is no different.

And below the cut is author notes of each entries plus a related short snippets that might be fun if you wanted to know more about each world ✨ The author notes are filled with spoilers and mostly safe for work (and not proofread).

But the Rose was Completely Unharmed

I had the most fun writing this... just because I’m always biased to Magical Girl Kara 😳💦 I had problems thinking of Painful Lines of Magic but that’s when Tundrea popped in my head with sunglasses and I was filled with rage🔥 Getto out! I’m writing this with Noriko in mind! Not you!!!

Oso-sensei is seriously infatuated with his student but since he’s in adult, he thinks he needs to be proper. It’s hard not to ogle crossdressing student on all-fours on the floor with pretty blue hair everywhere. He desperately is trying to figure how to get Kara to graduate properly so he can put his hands on his student without guilt in his mind. Hence why this shitty teacher is even trying to teach properly! Amazing!

This story wasn’t actually written together with Nori’s art at all 😌 But when I saw it, I thought it’ll be nice to connect the two, hence the “I will protect you” line. Unfortunately, it made Osomatsu cooler and I’m forever regretting it as he’s just shitty shotacon... Like all mages, Osomatsu’s real age is unknown, though Kara thinks it’s not too far from his own.

Speaking of Nori’s comic, we had a conversation that went something like this:

K: Nori, those magic crystal thingys… will reflect? Right? N: Yeah they do. It's magic (??) K: THEN THEY WILL REFLECT KARA’S PANTIES AND SENSEI CAN SEE THEM ALL THE TIME! N: But Kara is wearing shorts ��😂 K: ...KUSOOOOOOOOO ( ۶ ༎ຶД ༎ຶ) ۶ MY HOPES AND DREAMMMSSSS

Thus began Oso’s journey to melt the crystal trapping Kara and finally get to see the panties 😔

A back setting Karamatsu has is that his flooding magic is actually really weird in that there shouldn’t be fish and stuff in the water but there is. It’s not transportation magic so then Karamatsu is created them himself...? And maybe this leads to his fate later on...

Also, Karamatsu fell in love at first sight because Osomatsu resembled him, thus a dangerous guilty guy✨ Osomatsu’s real personality is just shitty, pathetic, clingy, and attention-hungry, so Karamatsu decided he will do the world a favour by looking after this useless teacher with immortal RABU. He sees Osomatsu clearly, but at the same time, kissing and even more is the last thing on his mind.

“Heh. I will exchange a hot, passionate baiser with you anytime you wish, my Dear Teacher!” The crossdresser said as he puckered up his lips with sparkling shitty looking eyes.

“Your teacher prefers not being thrown in jail so no thanks~” The teacher replies lazily, not looking up from his newspaper.

“WHY!? Such a handsome guy is offering this bountiful opportunity to you, and you refuse!?” Karamatsu looked at his teacher like his teacher was insane. And he thinks he’s probably right since all those gambling newspaper were probably bad for the brain. "There is no need to hold back. Come, MY DARLING!" He spread his arms with enough enthusiasm for the both of them.

The teacher had enough of his student's pestering and waved his wand to levitate an all-so-conveniently placed plushie to smack it right into the crossdresser's face.

"MUFH!?" A rather unladylike (gorilla-sounding, even) escaped Karamatsu's mouth before he pulled the said plushie off his face. It was kind of an ugly red thing. The crossdresser somewhat remembers this toy to be part of the 'Geruge' set with its oversized tongue and fluffiness. Still, it had a charm to it in that, the more you look at it, the more this red geruge thing start to look kind of cute. "Teacher, where did you get this from?" He couldn't help but ask since it was strange his teacher had this.

Osomatsu shrugged his shoulders. "It was the consolation prize they gave after I lost badly at magick pachinko~ I thought maybe it'll help me attract some boobs so I took it with me but it's too ugly." It did not come in a two-set. And there definitely wasn't a blue one he kept at home or anything. The series did actually have some strange popularity to it, so he didn't hide it until it was detention time or anything.

Really.

The unfair teacher opens his mouth to continue and says, "Go throw that in the garbage can for your teacher, okay? Thanks~"

"T-Throw!?" Karamatsu gasped dramatically like Osomatsu predicted. "How could you throw this Poor Innocent Sheep geruge Boy into the garbage can like that!?"

"Eh~ Cause it doesn't attract girls~" Osomatsu whined.

"And that is why you are the least popular professor here," Karamatsu deadpanned.

"So mean! I've just been hurt and insulted by my student! And the world is cruel 'cause teachers can't insult their students but the opposite can happen!"

Karamatsu didn't pay attention to his whining teacher and held up the red geruge in the air and twirled around. "Fufu~ Now that I look at you closer, you look at bit like Teacher," he laughs. "Since your Master doesn't want you, I shall take you home! Your name is Osogeruge from now on~!"

Osomatsu's heart skips a beat.

"Hey, could you not name that ugly thing after me~?"

"Hmm~? Don't worry, Teacher! I will make sunglasses and a leather jacket that will fit Osogeruge just right and he'll become a GUILTY GERUBOI in no time!"

"NO, PLEASE STOP!!!"

Osomatsu nursed his ribs that almost broke by imagining that red geruge in sunglasses and leather jacket (it was horrible).

"Teacher~" Karamatsu calls out, making Osomatsu looked out. He held the ugly red plushie in his hands before he dropped a kiss on it. "Since Teacher doesn't want my hot, passionate baiser, then I shall give it to this Karamatsu Boy instead!"

"...Okay, you are so getting a second detention and lines on the board! Get back here you shitty crossdresser!!!"

And a few weeks later when Osomatsu actually places a kiss on Karamatsu's forehead, his dumb student turned even redder than his Osogeruge plushie.

"...I think I saw a nostalgic dream," the teacher mumbles to himself. It seems he has fallen asleep even though that was the last thing he had time for.

When he looked up, it relieved him to see his student still there --- even if his student was captured inside crystals.

Shaking his head to clear away the fog in his tired mind, he forced his aching body up. "I'll be off. Be a good student and wait for your teacher until he comes back okay?" He places a smile on his face like nothing was wrong at all.

Tomorrow. The day after. Five years. A century.

In the end, it didn't matter how long it'll take for him. There was something much more important to him than time and his life itself.

"Please wait for me. Just a bit longer."

Earl Grey, with a Teaspoon of Blue Flowers

The ✨CUTEST✨ couple in the world, is thanks to Nori and her wonderful ideas. Incidentally, talking to her about it was enough to make the whole plot of this story, which is why this is the only story with an actual plot! Amazing Noriko power!

I wrote an outline of the story on piece of lined paper and the word limit of 5k was already making me sweat. Supposedly Teacup-kun was going to successfully bring Teru-chan outside and have a picnic. He was going to suffer having to hold hands with Teru-chan the whole time cause the white spirit was too curious of everything ("WHAT IS THAT!! AMAZING~ WOWOW~") and ignorant of all dangers in the world. On one hand, Teacup-kun gets to hold hands with Teru-chan; on the other hand, he was trying to make sure that Teru-chan doesn't get kidnapped by a bird or something 😂 The moment Teacup-kun loses sight of Teru-chan, Teru-chan comes back with the royal osokara round dogs he made friends with. Mini Oso and Kara on top of those round dogs are too cute... 😳

Speaking of this story, Nori and I had a conversation something like this:

N: I had to put fluff in Teru-chan's skirt because he will show his panties (??) K: NORI I THOUGHT WE HAD A DISCUSSION THAT TERU IS SUPPOSED TO HAVE NO PANTIESSSSS ( ۶ ༎ຶД ༎ຶ) ۶

But eventually it's been decided that Teru-chan needed panties or Teacup-kun would be distracted the whole time and wouldn't have been able to make a proper conversation  ;つД｀) Damn you panties...

Incidentally, that royal prince and princess are together and they spend lots of time together... Lots of time. Enough that Teru-chan knows only all the things at night in the two weeks he was made and lived in the princess' room (making Teacup-kun a shotacon✨). The prince is also a shotacon✨ Which leads to Nori's art here of Teru-chan lifting his dress when Teacup-kun had steeled his heart to take it slow so that he doesn't scare his new wife~

It is thanks to the prince that Teru-chan knows the concept of marriage when he knows barely anything else. It is also thanks to the prince that Teru-chan has the 'wrong' image of marriage, so good luck Teacup-kun!

Their end is something like this. It comes unexpectedly, but at the same time no one was truly in the wrong. A nervous new maid, afraid of all the expensive things that surrounded her, felt like she was walking on top of needles. The moment she made a mistake, she was sure she would get fired and end up on the streets since she needed this job more than anything. With quivering fingers, she tried to wipe the multiple tea sets to the best of her ability.

Unluckily for her, the combination of this new environment, her anxiety, and her discomfort and inexperience in wearing her complex maid outfit, she accidentally knocked her one of the teapots and cups she was cleaning.

Even before she heard the sound of porcelain shattering on the wooden floor below, she paled. She panicked – what should she do? Clean up the mess? Where’s the broom? Or maybe they can be mended? She swallowed down the urge to scream as tears slipped her eyes.

Before she realized it, she ran, trying to find her senior maid and ready to confess what she did.

In the next room, there was a white doll dangling by the window. It heard something shattered, and right away, it realized what happened.

He thought heard his husband scolding him to stay away but he didn’t listen at all. He floated down from the window and hurried as fast as his small body can take him. It took almost an eternity before he found the source of the sound – the sight of shattered porcelain. He called his husband’s name, begging for an answer. He knew he wouldn’t receive one, but he still held a small hope.

“Forever. Always.”

Surely that was the answer to everything, so the white doll roughly wiped his tears away. He held out his white dress and used it to collect every piece of the broken cup that made up his husband. Those uneven shards, small and big, eventually cut and tore the white doll’s body but he didn’t care.

He may not be able to hear his husband’s voice anymore but his husband was in these shards.

It hurt. It did hurt. His body cried in pain but his heart cried even more. Even then, despite that, the white doll tried to gather all those parts, almost breaking from the weight.

“…Forever… always,” the white doll whispers to himself. “…to have and to hold, from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, until death do us part.”

But even if the vow they made was until death, the white doll knew he will be lonely in no time. No, he was already feeling so, so lonely like he was trapped in a drawer on that day long, long ago.

That is why, he was sure that his husband will scold him for following all the way to death to see him. Yet that husband of his was always so kind that the white doll was sure he’ll get a hug and a kiss after being lectured.

With such a dream in his mind, the white doll tied up his tattered dress with the shards of his most beloved and crossed his eyes to sleep.

They are later buried together in the garden at the royal family’s wish. It didn’t take long before flowers and mushrooms sprout at the very spot the family buried them. Everyone could take a deep breath of relief. Somehow, they could come to believe the teacup and the white doll will meet again but in a different shape and form.

Always. Forever.

With you.

Rain, with Signs of Drowning

The first proper fanfic I wrote. If you read the rest, you can tell because the mood is actually sombre and serious 😂 It helped that I was writing with Nogi in mind? Probably. Writing is hard desu.

This fanfic was written in Kara’s POV and thus he missed a lot of hints and doesn’t know how desperate Oso is actually is~ But Oso is unfair in that he always wants to be cooler and ‘win’ since he’s the big brother. He wants Kara to drown in him because he doesn’t want to admit he drowned in Kara waaay before. He hides his internal turmoil behind a cocky smile and strips Kara naked with his eyes. But Kara is an idiot and doesn’t think about sexual acts and instead thinks Oso is literally hungry and wants a bite of his flesh 😰 (Kissing and biting must be how Osomatsu endures with his cannibalism urges! And me who lets him... is the true duty of the second son. Bang!! 😎✨)

Oso’s goal is to make it so that Kara can’t live without him.

He’s the shitty type that pulls sweaty Kara dressed in a tank top, really short shorts from the floor in the summer on top of him.

The fan barely relieved the effects of the boiling summer’s heat on him, and now with the added weight on him, it was even more suffocating. Even as his brain shouted it was frying and his lungs only took in hot air to scorch his body, he pressed the body on top of him close so that their skin touched more.

Who knows. Maybe they can melt together and become one like this, he thought with blood rushing down his lower body.

“It’s hot,” Karamatsu complained shortly. No doubt the heat was making the second speak less and without painful words. His eyes said ‘let go of me’ but Osomatsu pretend he saw nothing.

“Then push me off the sofa,” Osomatsu instead pointed out. He knew giving a choice will make Karamatsu stop and use his empty brain to try and think. But that empty brain doesn’t work long and soon Karamatsu will reach a no-conclusion. It took too much to push Osomatsu off, and, at the same time, it took too much will and energy to think of another option. Thus Karamatsu did nothing but lie on top of his older brother with an unamused frown.

Osomatsu just laughed. It was the kind of ugly face Karamatsu had when he just wakes up. The kind of expression he wouldn’t make to his little brothers on purpose at all. It’s not like Osomatsu didn’t feel a hint of guilt; still, he will use whatever he could.

His cute, cute stupid little brother. Narcissistic, kind, painful, timid, slow, airhead, and dumb.

“Don’t change, Karamatsu.” Like a curse. Like a prayer.

Don’t ever bother notice the wrongness of this relationship that’s too immature and depraved to call ‘love’. However, if he had to, Osomatsu would use that cheap, clichéd word ‘love’ Karamatsu liked in place of ‘possessiveness’.

But he’ll only do that if Karamatsu realizes something was off. If that day never comes, he won’t even bother, especially since he didn’t want to give unnecessary information to Karamatsu at all.

‘You don’t have to think, and if someone has to weigh down by this forever then it can be me. ...Cause I’m your big bro.’

“It’s hot,” Osomatsu says instead with common and simple words that his stupid little brother’s brain can actually comprehend and get distracted.

Karamatsu commented back, “Yeah, it’s hot,” not realizing he said the same thing earlier. But before those gears in his head can click in place, Osomatsu slips his hand up Karamatsu’s tank top and shorts to enjoy the bare feel of his little brother’s skin.

This body he forcibly opened up to take him inside remembers his touch and shivers. A small gasp escaped from Karamatsu’s mouth, which Osomatsu stole away.

“It’s so hot that I’m going to die~” Osomatsu complains.

“Y-Yeah,” Karamatsu replies absentmindedly, out of reflex.

Osomatsu bites that tanned throat in front of his eyes and grinds his lust and heat mercilessly without hesitation.

Surely the cries of the cicadas will distract his little brother from remembering how to complain.

Matsuno Karamatsu’s Ingenious Plan

Essentially all the porn I read is Japanese porn, so this 'plot' isn't all that strange if it's in Japanese 😂 I have read some pretty dumb Karamatsu, but I'm sure canon Karamatsu is a bit smarter. I'm also sure my Karamatsu in this fanfic was merely distracted by wondering if he wanted a glow-in-the-dark d*ldo or one that played music (because Ozaki). He is really happy, enjoying the NEET life to the fullest that he won’t survive very long in the outside wrong.

Onii-chan is super worried you know, Kara-chun~?

Hence why Osomatsu did suffer lots through the ages from horror that he gets hardty at the sight of his little brother’s smile to beating up weird guys that ‘invite’ an oblivious Karamatsu to things. Him eating Karamatsu’s love letters like a goat in high school was inevitable as Osomatsu did his best to sabotage all romantic relationships from ever happening. Osomatsu was that annoying older brother that will pop out of nowhere and throw his arm around Karamatsu’s shoulder to interrupt conversations. Once in a while, Osomatsu’s hand drops down to rest down on Karamatsu’s hip in a very possessive way but Karamatsu doesn’t get a thing.

Osomatsu did try confessing his love several times but they all end in failure. One of the cases is: “I LOVE YOU!!” “Heh. I RABU you too, my first BURAZA~😎✨ I am such a sinful guy to be so LOVED by my siblings!! Wowowow~!”

Osomatsu cried.

He would also like to argue that anyone in his shoes would do the same thing if their cute, stupid, sexy little brother comes by with a ruler and asking for your size ‘cause he wants a toy exactly the same.

On the side note, I realize the awesomeness of art drawn by western fandom because of no need for censorship. I GOT NONCENSORED DIKKU AND PEACHES FROM NORIKO WOWOWOW!!!! \(°口°๑)/ \(°口°๑)/

Totty will have lots of fun getting Am*zon to stop showing all those ‘interesting’ recommendations due to his search history. In fact he went and half-killed Karamatsu and then killed Osomatsu because it’s always Osomatsu’s fault.

Osomatsu groaned. His whole body ached and he could have sworn he saw his whole life flashed before his eyes. Actually, it felt like his soul left his body for a moment there?

He turned just his eyes and spotted his little brother, half-beaten up. He wondered why he got mixed up in this mess when clearly it was this idiot narcissist's fault. At the very least, he argued in his mind, Karamatsu should have gotten as beaten up as he did! Except Karamatsu might cry so maybe he didn’t want his little brother as beaten up as he is.

He forced his hand just the tiny bit forward so he could touch his little brother’s hand. It twitched back, which made Osomatsu happy for some reason so he entwined their fingers together.

“Hey, Karamatsu~ Still alive?”

“Heh… I saw Lord Enma and came back,” the second boasted with a similarly tired tone in his voice.

“Really~? And what did he say?”

“He said I looked like his pet snake? And that his ribs might break?? So he sent me back,” Karamatsu answered with confusion.

“Ah, somehow, it feels like I can drink beer with that guy,” Osomatsu mused. Yet, at the same time, he didn’t feel like meeting this Lord Enma dude. There was this shitty vibe to this so-called king of hell even he has never met the guy. Maybe just the pet snake instead.

The first shook his head; he was going off-topic because of the pain when more important things were going on. Osomatsu gripped Karamatsu’s hand tighter, still remembering the feel of his little brother’s skin below him. He faked a cough when he felt heat rush to his face. His heart thumped loud – no matter how many fail tries he gone through, he always felt nervous.

“S-So, Karamatsu~” He almost squeaked.

“Hm~?” The second made no indication he knew what Osomatsu was trying to get.

“S-So… umm… errr… ahhh…”

“What is it, Osomatsu? Do you need to go to the washroom?”

“No, I don’t need to poop!”

“Forgive me. I thought you wanted a shoulder to the washroom…”

Osomatsu mentally banged his head against something. This idiot little brother is horrible at reading the atmosphere when it actually counts. No, he can’t give up like this. He already ate his little brother’s maidenhood, and he's going to take responsibility and get his dreamed lovey-dovey normie life with lots of kisses and sex!!!

“Karamatsu!!” He shouted loudly.

Karamatsu twitched at sudden volume and looked almost frightened. “W-What is wrong!? Are you pooping in your pants after all, Buraza!?”

“No!! The one that does all the pooping in public is Ichimatsu! Or Choromatsu’s head!!”

“Oh, Mistake!! Ichimatsu, just you wait! I will bring the Miracle Lovely Angelic Feather of Harmony for your buttocks right now! Choromatsu, wait for me as well!!” Yet, despite those gallant brave words, this shitty narcissist made no move to get up because he was tired.

Osomatsu swallowed the urge to shout again because he needed to get away from this topic of poop (for once in his life).

“K-K-K-Karamatsu.”

“Hm~?”

“…I stole Totty’s wallet while he was beating us up. Wanna go to pachinko with it?”

“Heh. You can count me in!!”

F-First is a pachinko date, Osomatsu said to himself with a tremble. Small steps at a time! He was a virgin after all! (Except not.)

Feast and Indulgence

The entry that didn’t end up in the zine for a couple of reasons 😂 Actually, to be honest, the whole author note is the after story. Since the deadline passed when I handed it to Nori, she suggested writing Karamatsu’s side when I telling her the backstory to this fanfic. I was like?? (°口°๑) OH YEAH. THERE’S NO WORD LIMIT NOW??? NORI IS GENIUS!

And so I wrote Karamatsu’s side that totally destroyed the mood in the first part (I regret nothing) and now it wouldn’t be complete with it 😂 I didn’t mean to write with a darker(?) tone but I did comedy three times (Rose, Earl Grey, and Ingenious Plan), so for balance, I needed something more serious. As for why it became Shuten Douji x Dark!Aoandon, I wanted it to have ties with all the other fanfiction and Aoandon is perfect as he is the ‘gathering of tales’. Also, I did R18 for NEET so I needed R18 for AU next haha!

Shuten Douji used to be an outcast human child that would later be sacrificed to appease ‘kami’. In their world, kami do exist but they probably don’t care for humans much. If they decided to help out of whim, Karamatsu went and burned down the whole village and surrounding area before they did anything. In fact, Karamatsu probably consumed the surrounding kami and took their power. Before Karamatsu was Aoandon, he was certainly an incarnation of ‘fear’.

Perhaps Osomatsu reincarnated to be an oni because in his mind, oni were strong, frightening and more real than kami. But above all, they can live long, so he can be with Karamatsu for as long as he wants. As Shuten Douji, he was always irritated, starving for something that he didn’t know what, and drowned himself in alcohol. His tough body didn’t let him die easily and he became the head of all oni and soon reunited with Karamatsu once again.

…Well, we all know how that reunion went 😂

In about a hundred years, they will become that calm, loving married couple you see in Shuao! Really!!

Though the day Osomatsu wakes up to the smell of breakfast and sees his wife without the braided blue rope on his horn, he freezes.

Karamatsu frowned, raising an eyebrow like he was daring the red oni to say something. “Sit down and close your mouth before you eat a fly, my dear lord.”

“Eh? But… but your braid,” Osomatsu says, hesitatingly. He looked almost lost like a small child.

The blue spirit merely sighed.

For someone who's always concerned about any past ex-lovers showing up or friends or anything that knew Karamatsu from before they ‘met’, Osomatsu was strangely fixed on that braided rope. In fact, it was the only thing that Osomatsu accepted of Karamatsu's past. The red oni would go on a rampage if Karamatsu suggested that he would go back to his ‘hometown’.

“Unfortunately, unlike a brute like you, a stylish man like myself must keep up with the trends,” Karamatsu said with smirk. “I cannot be wearing the same thing for centuries, you see~? Hm~?”

“Ehhh…” The red oni let out in a mixture of disappointment and disbelief.

To begin with, that braided rope was a gift given to him from his human child friend who passed away long ago. It was important, yes. It was a memento of a past long gone and would never come back.

‘I no longer require such a thing to tie myself to the living world.’

Karamatsu was in love with the present he had now. He loved the past just the same – neither of them were a colour fainter than the other and both were beautiful vivid shades of red. If he could, he would like to gaze those shades of red for eternity.

“If it bothers you this much, my dear lord, then go buy something new for me,” Karamatsu instead says coyly.

Shuten Douji’s eyes brightens and he runs for their closet to rummage for his wallet. “I haven’t used my allowance for this month! I’m going go buy something! Just wait here, Karamatsu!”

“You can have these onigiri on your way down the mountain.”

“Thanks, Karamatsu~!” The red oni munches onigiri in one hand and a spiked club in the other as he hurried down to find the nearest clothing store.

The blue spirit shook his head due to how simple-minded his husband was, but it can’t be helped.

It took a whole day before the red oni comes back, dirty and beaten-up in places, with a big grin. “Here you go, Karamatsu!” He gives his wife an ugly flower he plucked from the mountain on the way up and a ‘present’.

Karamatsu took the present and inspected it. It was a black collar which would  be fastened by the long red braided ropes on each ends. “I would have preferred a skull but… I suppose it isn’t too bad when it comes to your fashion sense, my dear lord.”

Truthfully, it didn’t matter what his lord got him. Karamatsu was happy to get anything.

“It’s my colour this time,” Osomatsu boasts happily.

Karamatsu also came to realize this fact and laughed. “Then will you put it on for me, my dear lord?” He asks before handing the collar back and facing the garden.

Osomatsu took the collar and kneeled down on the ground. He secured the collar around Karamatsu’s neck before tying the red braided ropes into a clumsy bow. “W-What do you think? You don’t mind it right?” The red oni asks.

The blue spirit presses a hand against the black collar, feeling the weight. “Yes. This is mine and mine alone,” Karamatsu speaks with a heaviness that he was sure that Shuten Douji wouldn’t understand now.

“Huh?”

Karamatsu patted his lap and right away Osomatsu dropped on the ground to rest his head on his wife’s lap.

“And? Why did it take so long for you to come back, my dear lord?” The blue spirit asks closing his eyes as he caressed his husband’s hair

“That’s going to be a loooong story,” the red oni grumbles.

“We have all the time in the world, do we not? Tell me of your tale.”

“It won’t be a tale of love that you like but it’ll be a tale of how awesome your husband was!”

“I will keep my expectations low.”

“Hey! I was really awesome this time!!"

Thank you for reading! (๑˃ᴗ˂)ﻭ ✨✨

[nevermindtheweights]

NEET Princess at her massive gamer battle station, slurping down monsters as she bitches on her discord channel about how her limited edition figures got delayed again.

[nakura-san]

Durarara!!SH vol.2 - Chapitre  6A Les Visiteurs (Partie 3/3)

Quelques minutes plus tard.

Yahiro et Himeka, qui avaient été guidés jusque dans le salon et à qui on avait servi des gâteaux, s’échangeaient des regards, ne sachant pas quoi dire.

Pendant ce temps, leur interlocutrice, assise les jambes contre la poitrine et servant le thé, ne trouvait pas non plus d’opportunité de parler.

Mais alors, Kotonami Nozomi parla d’une petite voix, sans les regarder dans les yeux,

« Vous devez être, Mizuchi Yahiro-kun, et Tatsugami Himeka-chan. »

« ! »

Yahiro était surpris qu’elle connaisse leurs noms et prénoms alors qu’il s’était seulement présenté en tant que ‘Mizuchi’.

Himeka demanda d’une voix monotone,

« Vous connaissez nos noms ? »

«  Bien sûr. Vous êtes les amis de mon adorable petit frère. »

À la vue de Nozomi, qui souriait, toujours en détournant le regard, Yahiro était un peu déconcerté.

Mais sans se poser plus de questions, il accepta que la capitale ait des gens comme ça aussi, et continua la conversation sans s’attarder dessus.

« Um, en fait, Kuon-kun n’est pas venu à l’école aujourd’hui, donc… »

« Oui, je sais. »

« Hein ? Donc il était absent pour une raison en particulier, pas vrai ? »

« Oui, il y a une raison. »

Alors qu’elle sirotait son thé, un sourire sombre apparu sur son visage, et elle dit, joyeusement,

« Il a été enlevé la nuit dernière. »

« … ? »

« Il a été enlevé ; kidnappé. Mon frère Kuon. »

« Quoi… »

Elle dit cela d’un ton si détaché que Yahiro pensa d’abord à une blague, mais il se rappela ensuite de leur échange plus tôt.

« A- alors, vous n’avez pas ouvert la porte juste parce que vous pensiez qu’on était le kidnapper ? »

« Pas vraiment. J’ai peur des étrangers. Je n’ouvre la porte qu’à Kuon et aux livreurs. »

« ??? »

Incapable de comprendre ce qu’elle voulait dire par là, Yahiro se tourna vers Himeka.

Himeka, calme comme toujours, demanda doucement à Nozomi,

« …On dirait que vous n’avez pas prévenu la police à propos de ça, hm. »

« En effet, je ne l’ai pas fait. Kuon doit avoir des problèmes, et je détesterais que la police vienne dans cette maison. »

Elle se balançait d’avant en arrière, et même maintenant elle frissonnait encore légèrement.

« Honnêtement, c’est vraiment stressant que des gens que je n’ai jamais vu avant soient chez moi en ce moment, vous savez ? Je me sens mal à propos de la situation, surtout que vous avez fait tout le chemin jusqu’ici… »

Le regard perdu au plafond, Nozomi sorti un carnet et un stylo, et le fit passer à l’autre bout de la table, devant eux.

« P- pouvez-vous écrire vos numéros de téléphone ici ? Chacun d’entre vous. »

« ? »

-      Donc elle nous demande de laisser nos contacts et de rentrer chez nous.

-      Bon, on est entré de force, donc on pouvait s’y attendre.

Yahiro interpréta la situation de la sorte, et avec un regard à Himeka, il nota son numéro et rendit le carnet.

« M- merci. Buvez votre thé. Il y a plus de trucs à grignoter dans le frigo, donc servez-vous, okay ? »

« Er, huh ? »

Yahiro, qui s’attendait à être renvoyé chez lui, pencha la tête sur le côté en signe de confusion.

Alors, Nozomi rampa ou presque jusqu’à la porte, et se glissa dans sa propre chambre au fond du couloir.

« Qu’est-ce qui se passe… Qu’est-ce qu’on doit faire ? »

« Aucune idée… »

Les deux s’échangèrent des regards quand soudain, le téléphone de Yahiro sonna.

« Huh ? »

Yahiro fut surpris qu’un numéro inconnu l’appelle, mais il décrocha quand même.

Et alors –

‘Yaho~ ! Ça va bien ? Ah~, désolée qu’on n’ait pas été capable d’avoir une discussion correcte à l’instant !’

C’était la même voix que celle qu’il avait entendue dans le salon juste avant.

‘Ah~, on peut enfin parler ! Je suis vraiment nulle pour parler en face à face, tu vois ! Ça me rend tellement nerveuse que j’arrive plus à parler correctement ! Je suis vraiment désolée ! C’est pas que je vous aime pas ! En fait je vous adore ! Je vous aime vraiment beaucoup tous les deux !’

C’était la même voix ; mais tellement plus enthousiaste qu’il était dur de croire qu’il s’agissait de la même personne.

« Um… Nozomi-san ? »

‘Oui, c’est moi ! Ah, tu sais comment passer en haut-parleur ? Comme ça Himeka pourra parler aussi.’

«  Désolé, je sais pas comment on fait. »

Après ça, grâce à quelques explications, Yahiro parvint à activer cette nouvelle fonction de son téléphone avec succès.

‘Hello~ ? Himeka-chan, tu m’entends ?’

« Oui, ça marche. »

‘Ok~ ! Je peux t’entendre moi aussi !’

Apparemment, en projetant la conversation à travers le haut parleur, ils étaient capables d’avoir une conversation normale.

Après tout, leur interlocutrice était dans la pièce d’à côté.

‘Je me présente à nouveau ! Kotonami Nozomi ! Une sorte d’ermite, mais je gère toutes les dépenses de la maison, donc je ne suis pas une NEET ! Je paye aussi l’école de Kuon et les courses.’

« Êtes-vous écrivaine alors ? »

Himeka dit la première chose qui lui vint à l’esprit en pensant à une personne vivant recluse mais avec un travail, mais elle fut rapidement corrigée.

‘Nope, c’est pas ça ! Ah, mais je suppose que c’est quand même en rapport, vu que j’utilise un nom de plume et que j’écris des articles !’

« Un nom de plume ? »

‘Yep, c’est un pseudo, mais vu que j’écris, peut-être que nom de plume ça sonne mieux en fin de compte !’

Puis elle énonça un nom spécifique à travers le haut parleur :

‘Avez-vous entendu parler de … Lila Oha Zaiya ?’

Lila Oha Zaiya.

C’était un nom bizarre et c’était dur de savoir de quel pays il venait, mais Yahiro avait le sentiment de l’avoir déjà rencontré auparavant.

-      Huh ?

-      Je crois que j’ai déjà vu ce nom quelque part aujourd’hui…

Avant que Yahiro ne replace où, Himeka parla.

« … l’admin d’‘IkeNEW’, c’est ça ? »

‘Bingo ! Tout juste !’

« Ah- »,

s’exclama Yahiro en se rappelant.

Il se rappela que pendant la pause déjeuner, ses camarades de classe lui avaient montré un site qui avait diffusé la photo de Kuon avec le Motard sans tête.

C’était un blog appelé IkeNEW, et l’administrateur se nommait Lila Oha Zaiya.

« Huh ? Quoi ? Mais… »

‘Yep. L’article entier était une vaste mascarade de notre part~. Tu ne pourras pas retrouver le blog d’origine, vu qu’il n’existe pas ! Tout le monde s’est complètement fait avoir, trop drôle n’est-ce pas ?’

« ??? »

Des points d’interrogations apparurent tout autour de la tête de Yahiro.

-      Un article basé sur un faux blog ?

-      Pourquoi faire une telle chose ?

-      Et répandre des mensonges sur le Motard sans tête en même temps ?

-      C’est vraiment une bonne chose pour un site d’information de mentir comme ça ?

-      Au final, qui a kidnappé Kuon ?

A côté de Yahiro, dont la tête était trop occupée avec tout ses ‘?’, Himeka demanda à travers le téléphone,

« Et c’était… et du coup il a été kidnappé ? »

‘...Oh ? tu es vraiment futée.’

« … »

‘Il y a un problème Tatsugami-san ? Tu as une idée de qui peut bien être le kidnappeur, peut-être ?’

Yahiro, mettant de côté ses propres doutes, répondit à Nozomi, qui venait de dire des choses si étranges.

« Elle ne sais pas. »

‘Pourquoi tu dis ça ?’

« Si elle savait qui c’était, elle l’aurait simplement dit à la police. »

‘Je peux pas croire que je viens d’entendre quelque chose d’aussi droit et innocent à notre époque !’

Un rire rauque sorti du haut-parleur ; Yahiro pencha la tête sur le côté se demandant s’il avait dit quelque chose de drôle.

‘Yahiro-kun, tu es plus intéressant que je ne le pensais. À ton avis, qui a kidnappé toutes ces gens ?’

demanda Nozomi, clairement sérieuse.

Yahiro réfléchit intensément pendant un moment, avant de répondre,

« Les yakuza, peut-être… »

‘Et pourquoi tu penses ça ?’

« Um, je n’ai pas grand-chose sur quoi m’appuyer, même si… j’ai moi-même été kidnappé en 2ème année au collège, donc… »

‘...’

« … »

Himeka et Nozomi restèrent silencieuses.

Les deux étaient maintenant conscientes que Yahiro n’était pas du genre à faire des blagues.

Mais comme elle ne pouvait pas savoir pourquoi il aurait été kidnappé, Himeka était complètement incapable d’assimiler l’information, et même Nozomi, qui était plus ou moins consciente des rumeurs qui couraient sur Yahiro, était restée sans voix par la portée de ce qu’il venait de dire.

« À l’époque, ma grand-mère avait parlé avec quelqu’un de très important venant de ce groupe et m’avait récupéré, mais j’ai eu très peur tout du long. »

‘Tu es vraiment très intéressant.’

Puis Nozomi murmura :

‘Je vois~, c’est donc pour ça que Kuon est aussi intéressé.’

« Um, donc au final, est-ce que Kuon va bien ? Vous ne semblez pas très inquiète. »

Bien que la sœur de Kuon soit la victime dans cet incident, Yahiro énonça tout haut ses doutes.

Et elle répondit, nonchalamment :

‘Bon, je ne sais pas s’il va bien, mais il a son propre plan, je suppose ?’

‘Et puis, comme notre princesse vient de le dire… il a fait exprès de se faire kidnapper.’

<<début <précédent | suivant>

[nevermindtheweights]

I adore the NEET princess Weiss AU. Please I need to know what changes in the timeline led to such a based universe.

The vague idea is that it is probably a more modern AU where stuff like Grimm don't exist for a start, allowing a more peaceful measure of life. That'd be the biggest change.

I would also likely have it that she lives in Winter's shadow and lacks the confidence to really amount to much, making her retreat into staying inside and opting into worlds where she can be who she wants to be. Likely something happened to her early that shattered her confidence in general.

Her father would of passed away, leading Willow to have a more direct role too. They would have a better relationship with Willow partly enabling Weiss' habits, out of love. Willow herself runs most of the Schnee Company at this point, shared with Winter and Whitley who are being more directly groomed.

No-one really talks much about Weiss outside of the home either, out of a sense of embarrassment. Her family like her but not her choices but aren't able to do anything about. As Winter and Whitley are given more direct power as a result of what Weiss is, they don't see much reason to try and change her either.

So yeah, that leads to Weiss, the NEET Princess.

[nevermindtheweights]

NEET Weiss has no level of notable confidence in real life. She stammers, she avoids physical contact, she barely leaves the house let alone her room. Only her mother is her most direct form of contact and companion.

In game or online, she's the same sort of girl you know from the main timeline. She's prideful, she orders around, she is a little entired. She has bouts of gamer rage. She uses her family money to treat and reward her friends online.

She's a total shut-in.