#All I wanted was to open the spaghetti hoops but the spaghetti hoops opened me

[strabane-asda0]

Is it inappropriate to describe in graphic detail the way I saw the inside of my finger after I cut it open to my Irish bealtrial examiner or will they take pity on me and sneak in a few extra wee points that I will invariably lose on the sraith pictiúr

[mandoalorian]

Pain Is For The Living [Javier Peña x F!Reader] - Chapter 1 (SMUT)

Summary: Sex work in the heat of 1980’s Colombia was never going to be a walk in the park. Especially not when you had a crush on your number one client, agent Javier Peña. You’d been warned about him and his reputation, but after one very specific incident that would change your life forever, you find yourself attached to him like never before and you’d do anything to make him yours. Even if it means endangering your own life.

Warnings: 18+ SMUT (male receiving oral), allusions to sex, reader works in a brothel, PTSD, anxiety, panic attack, mention of drugs, guns, character death, typical Narcos themes.

Word count: 4000>

Series Masterlist

*reblogs appreciated! Ko-Fi in bio if you want to support me!

It was the hottest summer in twenty years; or at least that’s what the weather lady had told you when you were getting ready for work this morning. 

You’d been searching for your best friend Rosa all over the brothel, asking your colleagues if they’d seen her anywhere. They all shook their heads or shrugged their shoulders before disregarding your presence completely so they could get back to their conversations. You understood their cold nature to a degree. You were new and fresh-faced in Bogotá, and this sex work was the only thing paying your rent. Sometimes you got the feeling they didn’t like you, but you did your best to shrug it off. The manner of your job wasn’t an easy one, that’s for sure. But Rosa had been with you from day one. Not only was she your only friend, but also, she was a mentor, and she taught you everything you needed to know about being a successful sex worker in the heat of Colombia.

You finally found Rosa outside the brothel, leaning against the brick wall, her sunglasses perched on the curve of her nose. Immediately something felt off. You couldn’t put your finger one what exactly it was, but everything about Rosa’s demeanor concerned you. The cigarette that she held between her fingers was almost completely puffed out, with just a noticeable pink lipstick stain on the foot of the filter paper. You stood next to her and leaned against the same wall, by her side. You noticed her shoulders relax a little at your presence, but Rosa still didn’t say a word. It was strange. She was usually bubbly and talkative, eager to tell you all the gossip she had learned from her clients. 

“Peppermint for your thoughts?” you asked Rosa, diving into your pocket and bringing out a carton of peppermint candies. As you waited for her response, you placed one on your tongue and sucked on it longingly. You’d been working long hours and it was the first thing you’d eaten all day.

“In a minute,” she said, dismissing the sweet and wiggling her finger in the air. She huffed and narrowed her eyes, watching the busy roads intently before taking one final drag off the cigarette. She stumped the end out and threw it away, but the cigarette that was once in between her lips was now replaced with her thumb as she nervously bit at her nails. “Has Limón  come by today?” she asked you eventually.

You knew the cab driver. He’d frequented the brothel a number of times. Rosa often had a lot to say about him until suddenly, she just didn’t.

“Not that I know of,” you replied innocently, but something still felt so incredibly wrong. “Rosa, is everything okay?”

Rosa’s head snapped to face you, and for the first time you noticed the fear strike in her honey coloured eyes. She sighed and pursed her lips together, before raising her hand and cupping your face. Her thumb grazed the height of your cheekbone and she finally smiled. But it wasn’t like her usual smile. It was soft and— sad.

“Of course,” she told you. “Nothing to worry about.”

And you knew better than to push Rosa, so you decided to leave it at that.

Silence with Rosa was comfortable. You both observed the bustling streets of Bogotá. You were thinking about the simpler things in life, like whether or not you could afford the luxury of canned spaghetti hoops in advance of this month’s rent payment, or where in the brothel you’d left your signature lipstick. Rosa, on the other hand…

“He’s an agent you know.” She announced suddenly.

You furrowed your eyebrows together. “Who? Limón?”

Rosa let out a bark of incredulous laughter, and you assumed as such. “No no, not Limón. I’m talking about Peña.”

You felt your cheeks warm up at the initial mention of his name, and you tried to fight back a smile. You had to keep cool in front of Rosa. Sure, the whole brothel knew about your crush on your client but only Rosa’s opinion mattered to you. “Javier?” you quizzed, as if you needed to question who Peña could possibly be.

Rosa rolled her eyes playfully and you stifled a laugh, realising how silly you sounded. “You’ve got it bad huh?” Rosa acknowledged and you felt a flush of shame creep upon your cheeks. “It’s okay. When I first started out I had countless crushes on my clients.” she confessed, and her revelation made you feel somewhat better about yourself.

“How do you know that… about Javier?” you wondered out loud, biting your lip and trying to sound as casual as possible. You’re the girl he’d been fucking with for the past two months and he hadn’t dared open up to you about a single personal detail in his life. Truth be told, that’s what made him different from the other guys. So if anyone was to know anything about the man, it should be you. Why wasn’t it you? You couldn’t help but feel a pang of jealousy that your beautiful best friend was seemingly omniscient. “Have… have you been sleeping with him?”

Rosa frowned apologetically and smoothed out your hair. “No honey. I wouldn’t do that to you,” she promised and you nodded your head slowly. You had no reason not to believe her but she still hadn’t answered your question. Just as you went to prod her further, she opened her mouth. “But be careful. Crushes on clients can be dangerous. You never really know who you’re working with. Javier has a… reputation amongst the brothels in Bogotá.”

You swallowed the lump in your throat… a lump that you didn’t even realise you were holding back. “He seems nice. Respectful.” you admitted with a slight shrug of your shoulders. You’d be foolish to dismiss a word of advice from Rosa, but warning you about Javier…? You knew him better than that. You knew him. You had every inch of his body memorised. You could spot his scent from a mile away. You knew he was a good guy.

Rosa hummed slightly before squinting at an oncoming truck that was pulling up outside the brothel. “Speak of the devil.” She muttered.

“Javier!” you couldn’t help but beam excitedly. You quickly turned to face Rosa. “Could I borrow your lipstick? I lost mine and I-” Out of nowhere, Rosa pulled out her pink lipstick and passed it to you. You took it willingly and gave her a quick hug of gratitude. “Thank you.” you mumbled into her neck before pulling away. 

“Be careful!” Rosa called after you as you ran back inside the brothel and into the lobby where you’d wait for Javier.

Be careful. You chuckled a little at her words. You had nothing to worry about. You quickly applied your lipstick with as much precision as possible and checked your hair in one of the many mirrors. Your heart rate picked up speed the second you saw him enter the lobby. Today, he was wearing one of his trademark colourful button down shirts - this one, a pale yellow colour that was comparable to the sunshine. He was frowning, just like always, but the bright colour on him radiated an air of enlightenment.

He looked around the lobby in search of you, and when his eyes finally landed on you, he immediately felt at ease. You waved him over with a smirk and he took off his aviators, hanging them in the v of his shirt. His eyes were beautiful, like the deepest shade of cocoa. You made an unfortunate habit of getting lost in them at any given moment.

“Hi Javi,” you cooed, placing the palm of your hand on his chest. “You’re early today.”

“I can’t stay long,” he grumbled. “Have to get back to the office. Can we make it quick?”

You tilted your head curiously. “What do you have in mind?”

Javier brought out his wallet and handed you enough peso’s to cover an easy blowjob. He looked up at you, hopefully, with an adorable sheepish grin on his face. You took the money from him and nodded your head before taking his hand and guiding him to your room.

It was the room he’d grown completely accustomed to the past few months. He knew his way around. He was comfortable. He closed the door behind him and immediately worked at undoing his belt. You glanced over at his payment that you’d discarded on your dresser and thought long and hard. You really liked Javier. Enough so that you felt weird about taking his money. He was different to the other guys. You fucked men because they were paying you, but you fucked Javier because you liked it. You wanted it. Every second he wasn’t with you… you only craved him more.

Too lost in your own thought, you’d forgotten the man of your dreams was standing by the door waiting to get sucked off. He cleared his throat awkwardly and your head snapped in his direction to face him, your eyes going comically wide. You felt embarrassed that you’d left him waiting and quickly paced over to him, kneeling down and unzipping his denim jeans. He was already hard, judging by the familiar shaped imprint against his thigh.

“Everything okay?” he hummed as you pulled out his cock. His question turned into a slight garble as soon as your fingers graced his leaking head. You gathered his precum and rubbed it along his thick length and his eyes immediately snapped shut.

“Yes. Why?” you asked innocently before pressing a kiss to his slit. You looked up at him through your eyelashes with wide doe-eyes.

“Looked like something was preying on your mind.” Javier muttered, scrunching his face up in pleasure as you licked a stripe along the base of his cock. You extended your hand to massage his balls and you continued to pump at his length.

“Isn’t that why you’re here?” You beckoned further. “To let go?”

“Fuck,” Javier hissed. “More.” he pleaded and you quickly obeyed, wrapping your lips around his head and pushing his cock deep into your mouth. You felt his body tense up and he threw his head back against the wooden door. “More!” he choked out.

You hollowed your cheeks and sank your lips as far as you could go, so his groomed pubic hair tickled the tip of your nose. Tears began to prick your eyes and you pulled off him quickly to gasp for breath. Javier was heaving and panting too, and you took a second to look up at him and lick your lips. He was so perfect, a thin sheen of sweat glistened along his collarbones, only just noticeable under the dim amber lights of your room. Before he could catch you staring like a hopeless lovebird, you reattached your lips around his cock and finished up the blowjob, feeling more than satisfied when his ropes of cum spilled into your mouth.

Once his cock softened enough to tuck himself back in, he zipped up his jeans and redone his belt but not before helping you stand. Meeting respectful guys like Javier Peña in your line of work was a rarity, that’s for sure. Still you couldn’t help but think about Rosa’s words as you watched him smooth out his shirt. No visible police badge. No signs that he was an agent. To say it irked you was an understatement. How did she know he was an agent? There wasn’t a chance he told her… not when he was so secretive with you. You’d been fucking him for two months now and you didn’t know a single detail about his life. You didn’t know where he lived, or how old he was, or if he had any siblings. Rosa might have been your best friend, and she swore to you that she wasn’t sleeping with him on the side, so how did she know?

Of course, it could’ve easily all been bullshit. She could’ve been scheming a way to get you to fall out of love with him. Nobody likes a cop. You couldn’t figure it out no matter how hard you tried, but you knew for sure Rosa would never want to hurt you. You were annoyed for letting yourself get so irrational. You just wished… you wished that he’d talk to you. Treat you more than just some whore he got to use at his own beck and call. Your stomach twisted when you realised that was exactly all you were. A fool facing the wrath of unrequited love. You sighed and grabbed his jacket from the bed.

“Thank you,” he said, taking his jacket and swinging it over his strong forearm. It was too hot outside to wear. You nodded in acknowledgement but didn’t say anything.

For the first time since meeting Javier Peña, you had let yourself get hurt, and for no good reason either. You couldn’t confront him about it. You couldn’t tell him no matter how much he asked you. You just had to suck it up and get over him. He was a client and that was all he could be. Nothing more. Rosa was right. Falling for your customers was a dangerous deal.

“You’re my favourite, you know.” Javier announced, his voice low and heated. You locked your eyes on his. 

“What?” you asked, completely taken aback. 

“You’re my favourite girl,” he clarified with a small shrug, as if his comment wasn’t life-changing. Just like that, you were once again putty in Javier Peña’s hands. Your determination to get over him lasted all of five seconds. Before you could reply, he took a step closer to you, breaking any distance and placed a hand on your cheek. He leaned in and placed a chaste kiss to your forehead, his lips lingering against your skin noticeably longer than usual.

You weren’t mad anymore. Your feelings for him were restored just like that. Your eyes were wide as he pulled away from you and licked his lower lip. You felt like you were melting over the sweet menial gesture. You wanted to say something - anything. You wanted to pull him on top of you and crash your lips against his. But no matter how hard you tried to say something, no words came out. All you could manage was a shy little smile. It was the same smile that made Javier’s knees weak. He squeezed his hand into a fist to resist the urge of kissing your perfect lips and instead readjusted his sunglasses. You ducked your head down shyly and opened the door for him.

“Stay safe.” he uttered.

The same two words he told you after every visit. Stay safe. It was almost as if your client had a genuine care for you. You nodded in affirmation and offered him one last smile before he left the brothel and headed back to ‘the office’. Do agents even work in offices? You wondered.

You paced around the corridors of the brothel to find Rosa, wanting to return her lipstick and also tell her about Javier. You were excited. He really said you were his favourite girl. Out of all the girls, you were his favourite. To say you were beaming was an understatement. 

You caught her speaking to Javier as he walked out the brothel front door and you felt an anxious knot in your stomach tighten. It was hard to make out from the distance, but by the looks of it, Rosa was crying. The conversation was only brief, and Javier nodded along to whatever she was saying, before handing her a card and leaving for good. You officially had questions. You went to push through the crowds of people but a man much taller and larger than you placed a hand on your shoulder and pushed you back.

“Whoa,” you stumbled. “Can I help you?” He made some crude gesture with his fingers indicating the type of sex he wanted with you and you couldn’t help but scrunch up your nose in disdain. “Yeah okay,” you agreed with a small sigh. “Just a second though, I have to find someone. My room is 20 if you would like to wait for me--”

“No,” he growled, pinning you against the wall. “Now.”

You glanced behind his shoulder searching for Rosa but she had evidently already disappeared. 

“Okay.” you huffed, pulling yourself out of his grip and leading him to your room. You supposed you could tell Rosa about Javier after you’d dealt with this guy.

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

He’d left about ten minutes ago, and you were just finishing up in your room, getting ready to clock out of work and call it a day. The brothel lobby was often loud and bubbly, but the second you heard all the muffled chatter stop, you knew something was up. You pulled your purse over your shoulders and locked your room before walking down the corridor. As you approached the lobby, you heard loud footsteps and yelling. The second you stepped foot in the main room, you saw the man Rosa had been asking you about earlier in the day, and your heart sank.

“Where the fuck is she?” Limón shouted. He and another man paced around in circles. It had gone quiet because the men had the other girls, your colleagues, pressed against the wall, holding guns to their heads. Your eyes widened in horror and you immediately brought your hands up in the air to surrender.

“Are none of you whores talking? Where the fuck is she?” the other man hissed. 

“La Quica,” — so that was his name — “Shut the fuck up. You’ll draw unwanted attention.”

They hadn’t noticed you yet. There was still time to escape. But your feet were frozen to the ground. How could you dare run away and leave the girls here, unable to fend for themselves?

Limón pressed the handgun to Martzia’s head. “Where is she?” he spat.

“Who?” Martzia gasped.

“Rosa!” Limón bellowed, clocking the gun in anger. “Where the fuck is Rosa?”

“I- I don’t know!” Martzia cried. She was visibly shaking in terror. All the girls were.

“Bullshit!” Limón snapped back, and within a second, he pulled the trigger and Martzia was dead on the floor.

On impulse, you looked away, but you’d already caught an eye-full. Martzia’s blood was not only on the wall behind her, but it was on Juliet too, who was now a whimpering mess. Taking a deep breath, you mustered up all your strength to look back at the girls. Most of them had their eyes closed and their tear stained cheeks glistened under the dingy lights.

“You. Shut the fuck up.” Limón  growled before moving over to Juliet and pressing the gun against her head. She choked out a sob and apparently that was enough for Limón to pull the trigger on her as well. You slammed your hands against your mouth and let out an incomprehensible noise. That got Limón and La Quica’s attention. La Quica grabbed you and pinned you up against the wall so you were only centimetres away from Martzia and Juliet’s limp bodies.

“How long has that bitch been standing there for?” Limón asked angrily and La Quica shrugged his shoulders. Limón pulled on your hair so he could get a good look at your face. “Hey La Quica this whore must be new. Haven’t seen her around before. Nice ass too.” He smirked, wrapping his hand around your neck and squeezing it. “Do you know where Rosa is?”

You didn’t. But neither did Martzia and that had got her killed. Even if you did know where Rosa was, you wouldn’t give up that information. You couldn’t. Your heart was slamming against your chest and when you felt the handgun press in between your shoulder blades you thought you were going to pass out right then and there.

“Limón.”

It was her. It was Rosa. You felt the handgun slowly slip away from your back as both Limón and La Quica turned around to face your best friend. When you were certain they weren’t looking at you anymore, you turned around too so you could take a look at Rosa yourself. When your eyes met hers, you saw her face soften.

“Rosa!” Limón hissed, running over to the girl. “Tell me it isn’t true. Tell me it wasn’t you.” Limón grabbed on to Rosa and began to shake her. “My apartment was fucking raided, Rosa. A kilo of coke, gone. They know. They know we’ve been chauffeuring Escobar.”

You were baffled. We? She’d been helping chauffeur Pablo fucking Escobar? You shook your head in disbelief, praying it wasn’t true. She’d been lecturing you about the dangers of your job when she’d been doing the most dangerous thing of all. And how could she not tell you? If she had just told you… maybe you could���ve helped her. Maybe you could’ve done something. It couldn’t be true.

“I called the cops,” Rosa confessed, her voice emotionless and her face stone cold. “I called the cops and they put me through to the DEA immediately. I met with an agent. I told him everything I knew. I ratted you out Limón, and you should thank me.”

Limón raised his hand and slapped Rosa across the face. “You bitch!” He shouted. “How could you do this to me Rosa? How could you fucking--”

Then, a gunshot.

The sound was blinding and everything went in slow motion. You swore that your heart stopped beating as tears streamed down your face. You screamed as you watched her body fall to the ground.

“La Quica you fucker! You killed her! You killed Rosa!” Limón cried out in anguish, grabbing his friend by the shoulders. “What the fuck man! What the fuck!”

“She confessed,” La Quica huffed, trying to calm his friend. “I know you liked her but she’s a fucking whore, Limón! She made her mouth go. She’s the reason you had the fucking DEA sniffing out your apartment. We’re not only in trouble with the cops but if Escobar finds out… shit man. I’m scared.” 

Both La Quica and Limón were visibly freaking out. They had put their guns away at least, but they were pacing around in circles again and shouting at each other. But you couldn’t hear a single thing. You couldn't see anything... just the blur of their bodies. You couldn’t smell and your fingers felt numb. You felt like you were falling. Your chest was tight and your heart was broken.

“We have to run Limón, three fucking gunshots. Three dead bodies. The cops have probably already been called.” La Quica informed Limón as he helped coach his friend’s panicked breathing. You looked down at Martzia and Juliet’s bodies on the floor and then your gaze followed over to Rosa’s body. As the men scrambled out the brothel, you fell to your knees and crawled over to your best friend.

“Rosa,” you whispered, tears streaming down your cheeks as you picked up and cradled her body in your arms. Her blood was all over you, and you felt like you could throw up at any second. “Rosa please. I- Rosa. No no no what… What did you do Rosa?” You chanted your best friend's name and cried into her body.

What did she do?

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[teruthecreator]

sweet surprises

lord forgive me for the cringe i’m about to post. i fully blame this post and this post for planting the seeds of berdley having a crush on kris in my brain. also shouts out to izel for listening to me go insane at 3 AM about this. 

anyways, here’s a thing. 

______________________________________________________________

Excitement is in the air.

Unlike the usual calm monotony of life at school, things recently have been quite...electric. Not because of the portal to the Dark World hidden behind the door of the closet, or the adventures had by a select group of students through the portal in the Librarby a few days ago. No, this isn’t about that.

This is about the Sadie Hawkman’s Dance. The once-a-year phenomenon where the school puts on its best interpretation of a formal dance for the incredibly small number of students who attend class. Students buzz in excitement for the event, preparing their most formal outfits and getting ready to dazzle their friends and fellow classmates with their dramatic entrances into the auditorium.

And, of course, there’s the all important ritual of asking someone to the dance.

There’s already been a few proposals made this week. Jockington rolled into class like a hula hoop and asked Catti to be his “best bro” for the dance, to which she happily agreed. (And by that, I mean she looked up from her phone, smiled, said not a single word, and went back to typing.) Temmie loudly announced to the class that she would be taking her egg, which was somehow...embarrassed that she mentioned it. And, of course, Noelle finally managed to work up enough courage to ask Susie to the dance. It was done in an incredible display of candy canes that spelled out the phrase: “CAN(E) YOU BE MY DATE TO THE DANCE?” Unfortunately, Susie was about halfway through scarfing the display down before she realized what it said. She then began choking on one of the candy canes out of disbelief, which wound her in the nurse for the rest of the day. But, when she could speak again, she very quietly agreed to Noelle’s proposal (and, if you happened to be a fly on the wall in that room, you could hear a tail thump rhythmically against the doctor’s bench as she did so).

Kris was pleased with everything. They were happy to see their friends so happy together. A long time coming, if you asked them. And they’d be just as happy attending the dance solo, since they’ll undoubtedly be dragged along by Susie. They’d never gone to the dance before--never had a reason to, truth be told. But with their newfound friends, they may just enjoy being a wingman for the night.

...Speaking of wingmen, Berdly will probably be going solo as well. Unsurprising, but Kris makes a mental note to ensure the bird will be in attendance. As much as he is kind of a lot sometimes, he’s their friend. And Kris is going to make sure all of their friends are having fun at that dance!

They walk into class thinking of this (surprisingly early, for a change), which is why they almost miss the massive display sitting boldly atop their desk. They freeze the instant it catches their eye and, for a second, they almost believe it isn’t real. Like some leftover thoughts of the Dark World lingering in their vision. But, after wiping their eyes and seeing that it’s still there, they decide to approach and...investigate.

The display is expertly crafted by someone who clearly knows their way around a glue gun. It is a heart-shaped arch that is decorated with a myriad of printed illustrations of Super Smashing Fighters Melee characters, all having cut-outs to hold different bars of chocolate. There are also numerous origami hearts glued around the characters on the arch, in colors spanning across the rainbow. The arch is painted in swirls of blues, pinks, and reds and covered with a border of glitter that sprinkles onto the desk when Kris reaches out to pluck a chocolate bar from its perch. On the desk itself is a big origami heart that says “TO KRIS” in gold calligraphy. It is by far one of the coolest, nicest, cheesiest things Kris has ever seen.

They look up from the display to see if anyone else is seeing this shit, and that’s when it all clicks.

Because sitting at the front of the classroom, fidgeting way more than normal, is Berdly. He keeps interlocking his ankles underneath his desk before unlocking them and kicking the air, turning around every half-second or so to try and catch Kris’s reaction. From the brief moments Kris can see the front of him, they notice he’s not in his usual white collared shirt and black khaki shorts. Instead, his shirt is buttoned all the way up, with a nice blue bowtie tied around his neck. He also traded out his khaki shorts for a pair of dress pants that look to be a tad too long for his legs. He keeps reaching up to smooth out the feathers on his head, which immediately stick back up from stress.

Now, Kris may be a straight B student, but they’re not stupid. Context clues are a very good thing, and all signs point to Berdly as the culprit of this public display of...affection?

Beyond Berdly is Ms. Alphys at her desk, who shoots Kris a look of deep understanding and maybe...guilt? She looks at Berdly for a split second and shrugs her shoulders, indicating he was probably in here long before she was and so she had no way of stopping him from leaving it there.

Kris looks back down at the display and picks up the large origami heart. As they begin to unfold it, they see a sprawling letter written in the same flashy calligraphy. Kris squints at the letters--they’re dyslexic, so everything kind of just looks like spaghetti on paper. Still, they’re able to make out the largely printed question of “WILL YOU GO TO THE DANCE WITH ME?” with no issue.

Huh, guess they won’t be going to the dance alone after all…? It’s a little confusing as to why Berdly would want to go with them, though. Like, they’ve hung out a little bit--usually whenever Berdly wanted a “worthy rival” to play video games with, he would come over and Kris would whoop his ass for a few hours. And, of course, there were the recent events in the Cyber World; but Kris is pretty sure them and Susie had thoroughly convinced Noelle and Berdley that that was all a dream. So, why them?

They’re lost in this train of thought for so long that they don’t even notice the other kids enter the room until they suddenly hear:

“Yo, Kris???????? What the heck is this thing????” Susie’s voice doesn’t startle them, but it is loud enough to get them to look up. Susie is standing next to their desk, looking at the display with genuine amazement thinly masked by disgust. She’s also loud enough to basically stop the whole class (who were all muttering amongst themselves about it anyway), which gives Kris only a second to gaze around the room before--

SLAM!

The door to the classroom slams shut, leaving one seat unoccupied.

Berdley’s.

“This thing’s got chocolate on it????” Susie continues to marvel at the display while Kris looks at the door, frowning. They feel...bad. It isn’t Berdley’s fault for trying to fit in with the other kids' proposals; he admitted to feeling like he needs to do more just to stand out enough for people to acknowledge him back in the Dark World. And this thing is really...thoughtful! The characters are all ones Kris typically mains, or ones they know Berdley mains, which means he remembers things about Kris. And the chocolate is a given, but it is nice to be able to stock their personal snack stash with some fancy stuff. Ultimately, it’s very sweet, and Kris can’t help but feel a little guilty for not saying anything immediately.

They turn and lock eyes with Ms. Alphys, who looks extremely out-of-depth with this situation. She makes a number of gestures from them to the door in a flustered way of saying I have absolutely no idea what the hell is going on please help me Kris I know I’m asking a lot of you but I don’t know how to deal with teenage angst I’m like thirty-five. They sigh, standing up and walking past Susie (but not before giving her a stare that warns her if a single chocolate bar is gone that they will be holding that over her until the day she dies) and following Berdly out the door.

It doesn’t take Kris very long to follow the trail of labored breathing to where Berdley is--in the abandoned classroom, hyperventilating as he teeters on a breakdown. Luckily, when Kris opens the door, it seems to put a halt to his spiralling because he just kind of...freezes. Like a deer caught in headlights. Or a Berdley caught in Kris-lights. Kris takes this moment to let the door shut behind them, trapping the two in here. Together.

“U-Uhhhhh, hi--he--Um. H-Hello, K-Kris…” Berdly attempts to put on his usual bravado, but his voice betrays him brutally by squeaking and cracking on every syllable. Kris can’t help the smile that comes to their face.

“Uh, hey,” they reply with a wave. Berdley continues to stand there and stare (almost like he wasn’t expecting Kris to care enough to follow him) before the present circumstances return to his mind and he begins breathing hard again.

“I-I-I-I, uh...I was. Um. J-Just, uh. G-Getting some fresh air! Y-Yes! The classroom can be s-so stuffy sometimes, I’m sure y-you--you, uh...you agree?” Berdley makes a valiant attempt at hiding his panic, which Kris almost takes pity on. But they don’t think the monster will feel any better if they just pretend what happened back there never happened.

“Yeah. I liked the display.” Kris says simply. Berdley stands stock-straight at that, looking even worse for wear in the “being normal and completely cool” department.

“O-Oh??????? That ol’ thing????? I, um--well I just--y-you see, I--uh. Um,” You can really hear the gears in his head turning as he attempts to come up with an excuse. “I-I-I just thought you w-would appreciate the craftsmanship of!!! A t-true artisan, such as myself!!! So, I!!! M-Made it!!! COMPLETELY PLATONICALLY, OF COURSE!!!! I-I would never imply that my intentions w-were anything other than for bro-sies, i--You didn’t read that whole card, did you?”

“I can’t read,” They mean this as a joke, but they can see Berdley seriously consider this for a second too long. “Dude, I’m dsylexic. I can’t really read cursive…” Berdley freezes up once more, which makes Kris realize they haven’t really projected that as loudly as they might’ve thought.

“Oh! Right! How could I forget! That you’re! Dsylexic!” Berdley’s smile is stapled to his face as he begins to rhythmically knock on his head. “And I! Wrote! That! Entire! Note! In! Cursive! Which! You! Can’t! Read!!!” Kris steps forward in an attempt to keep Berdley from bashing his own skull in, but that only makes Berdley more tense, so they take a step back. “I-I just--The note isn’t important! None of it’s important actually can we forget this interaction ever happened okay? Okay yes that’s great have a wonderful day Kris I will be returning home to sitinmyroomandneverreturntothecorporealrealmalrightgoodbyeforeverKris--” He attempts to sidestep around Kris and out the door, but is very easily intercepted.

“Stop.” Kris grabs him by the shoulders, which seems to shut him up for a second. “Can you just tell me what’s wrong?” Berdley gapes at them as his face steadily grows redder, which makes Kris feel as if there’s something on their face. But he quickly shakes it off, going from completely neurotic to...dejected.

“I just…” He starts, trailing off immediately. “You deserve to have a big proposal, same as everyone else. I-I see you in the back of the class, just...watching. And I, uh, felt it was time to...give you the spotlight! But that was silly of me, wasn’t it?” He looks off to the side at the floor, smiling sadly. “After all, who’d want to go to the dance with me…? I-I’m alone every year, standing in the background. Just kind of...taking it all in...and th-thinking about how it’d be...nice to be a part of it. But that’s...not probable. It was just nice to think about taking you to the dance because you’re--well, you’re nice to me, and you’re funny, and you actually listen to me when I’m talking, an-and you’re a good person and an incredible gaming legend...but I shouldn’t have put it all on you in front of everyone...I’m. I’m sorry, Kris.” He won’t make eye contact with the human, but Kris can still see the tears collecting in his eyes.

“Berdley, that’s stupid.” Kris says, which Berdley cringes at, “Why wouldn’t I wanna go with you?” That part is...not what Berdley was expecting. He looks up at Kris, unsure of where to go from here.

“U-Um…? Because of all the previously stated things? Like me being a complete loser who nobody likes?”

“I like you,” Kris replies immediately, leaving Berdley’s feathers sticking straight up as he flusters. “And I like your display. It’s...really sweet.”

“E-Even if you can’t read the note?” Berdley’s voice cracks.

“I mean, I could read the: WILL YOU GO WITH ME TO THE DANCE part, so, like. Yeah.” Kris shrugs. “Plus, you got me chocolate. Nice chocolate. Nobody...gets me things like that.” They smile, a light dusting of blush across their face. “I’ll go with you.” Berdley’s entire body seizes up for the third time, eyes wide and mouth agape.

“W-W-w-W-w-w-w-w-W-W-W-w-w-w-Wh-Wha-wh-w-w-wha-wha-w-wh-Wh-Wha-wh-Wha-wha-w-w-W-W-W--” Berdley continues to struggle with the word “what” for a solid minute and a half before he’s finally about to manage a: “What?!” Kris can’t help but laugh.

“I said that, Berdley,” at this, they move their grip from his shoulders to his hands, “I will go to the Sadie Hawkman’s dance with you.”

The circuits in Berdley’s brain struggle with this frequency for an extended moment before his face erupts in the giddiest smile Kris has ever seen the bird monster sport. He even begins to jump up and down, taking Kris along with him, as he cackles. It is a surprisingly cute display that Kris finds themselves blushing a bit at. It’s nice to be this...cared about.

“I-I--We have to start thinking of outfits immediately!” Berdley blurts out, returning to their usual demeanor. “I was thinking of some complimentary color schemes on the way to school today which I will be happy to show you at lunchtime. I’m also a master with a sewing machine, so if you are unable to procure an outfit that meets the color requirements, I would be delighted to take your measurements and--w-wait, don’t read into that phrasing, I just m-meant that I could make an outfit for you! B-But I’d need your measurements, and--Oh, goodness, hasn’t class started already, Kris?! We should head back, but--” He looks from the door to Kris and back again a few times before finally settling on something.

“I’lltalktoyouaboutthislaterseeyouinclassKris!!!!!” He says this right before he gives Kris a solitary peck on the cheek before bolting out of the abandoned classroom, leaving Kris blinking at the Berdley-shaped cloud he left behind. Their hand gently grazes the spot on their cheek--luckily not actually pecked by his beak, but more of a quick-kiss kind of peck--and feel their heart skip a beat.

Huh.

That’s...different.

They elect to not dwell on that feeling any longer and head back to class. They have to make sure Susie hasn’t eaten all of the chocolate on that display.

They wouldn’t want to make Berdley go through the trouble of re-proposing  just so they could rightfully claim their other sweet surprise.

[crusheswhimsandfancies]

How’s your cooking? Any good?

“Quite good”, says Reece, (so matter of factly, it just kills me.)

Are you?

“Yeah.” (Even more blasé like it’s nbd💀💀💀)

What kind of things do you cook?

“Err, sort of childrens things…”

Laughing. Steve: opening tins?!

“Yes. Spaghetti hoops (pauses for the laugh). I can do spaghetti bolognese and cottage pie and kind of whole, kind of meaty sort of things…”

Do you like cooking?

“Sometimes I despair at how long it takes and how quickly it’s consumed. So it’s like all that work and then it’s gone in ten minutes. Somehow I want it to last longer and it’s like ‘do you know the work that’s gone into this?’”

Something for the Weekend, 2011

(x)

[ladyaj-13]

I posted 552 times in 2021

192 posts created (35%)

360 posts reblogged (65%)

For every post I created, I reblogged 1.9 posts.

I added 241 tags in 2021

#aj rambles - 58 posts

#louis tomlinson - 33 posts

#endeavour - 26 posts

#one direction fanfiction - 26 posts

#bbc ghosts - 25 posts

#1d - 17 posts

#tag game - 14 posts

#my fic posts - 14 posts

#aj answers asks - 14 posts

#fanart - 14 posts

Longest Tag: 129 characters

#i'm never sure who my mutuals are so if i ever tag you in something and you're like 'who is this person' pls don't worry about it

My Top Posts in 2021

#5

Fandom: One Direction, The Great British Bake Off RPF Pairings: None Tags: Baking, Friendship, Reality TV, Canon Compliant, Post-One Direction, Teamwork, Fluff Rating: G Length: 3.8k

Summary: The camera pans across lush parkland to highlight a white tent, crisp and blinding in the spring sunshine. Four people cross the green lawn, elbows knocking until one is shoved to the side. The camera shot changes, zooming in on the same four figures lined up in cream aprons.

“We’re One Direction,” they say, with cheesy grins and almost in unison. “And this is The Great British Stand up to Cancer Bakeoff!”

Read the fic!

65 notes • Posted 2021-06-23 18:10:06 GMT

#4

If you’re wondering what my sense of humour is, it’s this gif

79 notes • Posted 2021-01-07 09:02:29 GMT

#3

An underrated scene is when Lady Button opens up about her death, and the older ghosts say "Yes, I knew that actually. I was there." It's funny - not just Martha's delivery, but the undercutting by the other ghosts, and the revelation that Fanny never put 2 and 2 together when she learned about the afterlife and realised her day-to-day business was watched by a horde of unseen others.

And then you think about it a bit more, and realise that in that scene, Fanny still thinks it's a secret. It's been a hundred years. And not once, in all that time - all the disagreements and bickering and boredom - did anyone bring it up. Not Robin, who let's face it, messes with people for fun. Not Thomas, who isn't above trying to score a cheap point. Not Mary, who can be pretty oblivious. Not Kitty, who wants to bond and share secrets. (And not Humphrey, but of course he wouldn't.)

I just think that's actually really sweet.

126 notes • Posted 2021-01-07 17:09:55 GMT

#2

Fandom: One Direction

Pairings: Harry/Louis, side Zayn/Liam

Tags: Alternate Universe - College/University; Dual time periods; Enemies to Lovers; Recreational Drug Use; Zouis friendship

Rating: G

Length: 9.6k

Summary: Is it ethical to accept a dinner date for the free food? And will you hate me when I go anyway? Fact 1: Louis hates Harry Styles. Fact 2: Louis is temporarily living off toast and spaghetti hoops Fact 3: ...Louis may be semi-accidentally dating his worst enemy.

Read the fic! (would have been useful to add the link from the off, but hey, I'm a rebel :P)

210 notes • Posted 2021-06-24 12:07:25 GMT

#1

Can we just talk about how Mike is the real MVP of Button House? It must be weird, and not just in the 'not sure if there's a ghost watching me in the shower' way that the show riffs on, but that he's alone in this huge house with his wife who's constantly having conversations he can't follow, laughing at things he can't see, and has a whole new group of friends (if we're being generous) and a new life that he'll never be a part of. He must feel left out. But he handles it all with such... I wanted to use the word grace, but that doesn't go with Mike! Aplomb? Humour? I don't know - he's just very accepting and easy-going about it all, and it's a situation which could have easily gone the other way, and I love him for it.

506 notes • Posted 2021-01-06 08:25:06 GMT

Get your Tumblr 2021 Year in Review →

[nataliedanovelist]

GF - Knitting

Summary: Ford finally musters up the courage to ask Mabel to teach him something he desperately wants to learn.

Requested by both @starpossum and @3hobbitsinatrenchcoat. Thank you both so much, and I hope you like it!

~~~~~~~~~~

Ford had no reason to be so nervous as he stood as stiff as a board and tried to steady his racing heart, but he was. Maybe not as nervous as he was to walk into the principal’s office alone or when he was about to present his project to the college representatives, but a bit nervous. About what? Judgement? Rejection? But that was ridiculous! She was one of the most caring, open-minded, loving people Ford had ever met in his sixty years of living, in any dimension he had come across. Surely he was about to enter a safe domain. Taking advantage of his sudden flock of courage, Ford pushed open the screen door and let it creak to warn his grandniece of his upcoming presence.

Mabel was sitting on the couch as the early-morning sun shined through the trees, just recently risen. Ford smiled at seeing the thirteen-year-old girl knitting quietly with Waddles asleep by her side, a perfect way to start the day. Mabel looked up and instantly made a huge grin at her grunkle; this wasn’t the first time the two early birds had graced each other with their presence and she hoped it wouldn't be the last. “Hi, Grunkle Ford!”

“Good morning, Mabel.” Ford sat by her side on the couch and looked down at her work. Like every morning, she was knitting a sweater. While most of the time she knitted for herself, occasionally she would knit for someone else. “What are you working on today?”

Mabel held up her half finished sweater, which was black with a skull on it, a bit edger than her usual taste and it certainly caught Ford by surprise. “I’m working on my Summerween daytime sweater. And I can wear this at the vampire concert I’m going to this Saturday.”

“Oh,” Ford said and shrugged with a smile. “Well, be sure to eat something with lots of garlic before you go.”

“Don’t worry, Grunkle Stan already promised that he’ll make spaghetti and garlic bread for dinner that night.”

Ford chuckled lightly, “That should keep you safe,” and ruffled her hair gently. Silence fell between them comfortably as Mabel worked blindly, her eyes admiring nature at it’s finest, and Ford did the same, though his mind was elsewhere.

This was stupid. This was preposterous. This was ridiculous. This was ludicrous. This was absurd. Suddenly he was almost too apprehensive to talk to his own family, but why? Surely it wasn’t due to a lack of bravery; he had faced thousands of monsters and even an all-knowing braid demon. No, the fact was that Ford was far more afraid of the smallest possibility that Mabel would turn him down or laugh or deny his request than he was afraid of anything in the Multiverse. But really, the possibility that Mabel would say no was laughable, so he steadied himself with a quiet intake of breath and said quietly to have her attention, “Mabel?”

“Uh, huh.” She said and looked up at him and even paused her knitting to give him her undivided attention. Ford somewhat wished she hadn’t.

He cleared his throat and tugged at his turtleneck a little to try to make it easier to breathe. “Would it be… erm, I mean, I understand you’re a very busy young lady, but… I-I-I would be honored if you would find… um, I mean, if you would take the time to walk me through the details on how to create sweaters by hand.”

Mabel’s eyes widened. Ford misread her facial expression and quickly looked away. He could feel heat rising in his face uncomfortably. “You… want me to teach you how to knit?”

“Of course, I understand if you don’t want to, I fully anticipated that you would much rather…”

“GRUNKLE FORD, I WOULD LOVE TO!” Mabel threw herself into Ford, catching him by surprise, and she wrapped her arms around his neck and nuzzled her face into his shoulder. “I’ve been waiting almost a year for this moment! I’m so happy you wanna learn how to knit! What made you wanna learn?!”

“Oh,” Ford was still slightly too flustered to communicate properly, but he tried. “I… I suppose you inspired me t-to give it a try, y-y-you know?”

Mabel squeezed him and then let go to grin at him “Well then you came to the right gal! Give me a second, I’ll be right back with everything!” And very soon she was gone.

Ford smiled at himself, feeling a bit stupid. Of course Mabel would be delighted in teaching a loved one how to perform a task she had mastered. But still, he had been waiting to ask her for so long now and had built up the moment in his head that of course his insecurities would ram their ugly head.

Mabel came back with a suitcase filled to the brim and a messenger bag over her shoulder that was decorated with buttons. Ford raised an eyebrow as Mabel let the suitcase sit on the floor and she zipped it open. He was amazing to find dozens of balls of yarn arranged in rainbow order in the suitcase.

“Okay! It’s very important when you knit to work with colors you like.” Mabel instructed as she sat next to him on the couch. “You’re going to be looking at your yarn for a long time, you don’t wanna pick a color you’re gonna get sick of, so pick any color you want!”

“That makes sense.” Ford complimented and held his cleft chin in thought. There were so many colors it was like he was at a craft store. One caught his eye and he happily picked up a blue ball of yarn with white freckles in it. “I think I’ll use this one.”

“Oo! That’s pretty! Okay,” Mabel picked up a dark-green ball of yarn and rested it in her lap. She rummaged through her messenger bag, which from the soundso fi t was full of knitting needles, and she pulled out a pair of orange average-sized needles. “There’s different sizes of needles for what you wanna make, but this is a good beginner’s set. You can keep them if you want.”

“Thank you, my dear.” Ford said, quite excited now that he had the materials he needed to work. “So how do we make a sweater?”

Mabel giggled innocently and elbowed the sleeping pig. “Waddles, you hear that, Grunkle Ford is so cute.” She stopped her laughing to gently guide her student. “Sweaters are really hard, you have to master knitting first before you do something that complicated. The best thing to knit first is a scarf or maybe a hat if you’d rather make a hat.”

“Oh.” Ford did feel a little foolish to think one could go from not knowing how to knit to making sweaters, but he smiled was was excited to learn how to make several articles of clothing. “Very well, I think a scarf would be perfect!”

“Great!” Mabel picked up her ball of yarn and said, “First, you wanna find the tail, it’s usually tucked inside… right there, perfect! Now unwind some, you’ll need a few feet to get started. That’s good, perfect! Now, I’ll go ahead and warn you, getting started is harder than the actual knitting, so if you can get the ball rolling you’ll be gold!”

“Okay, so…”

“Right. First, you wanna make a rainbow… yes! Now cross the ends over like this… good! Then, you see this part of the string? Pinch your fingers, poke them through, grab that part, and pull it through. That’s it, you’re got it! That’s the main hoop, you put it through your needle and pull it tight, like this.”

Together the pair hooked on their first hoop and Mabel smiled proudly. “Good, now grab the long part of the yarn, not the tail, that’s the one! Now what you wanna do is twist it around your fingers, like this.” And Mabel demonstrated it on her hand. Thankfully it mostly consisted of her thumb and pointer finger, so Ford was able to copy it exactly. “Yes, good, now do you see this little hole? Just gently poke your needle through, and pull it off. Watch.” Mabel showed Ford what to do and Ford carefully copied her. He was delighted to see he successfully made another loop, and so he did it again and again.

“Wow, you’re a fast learner!”

“Well I had an amazing teacher.” Ford complimented.

Mabel blushed and said, “Okay, so these loops are how wide the scarf will be, see? So the more loops you make, the thicker it’ll be, so when it’s thick enough you stop. Don’t forget, yarn is fluffy, so it’ll be thicker than this first row.”

Ford nodded to show his understanding and thought of how thick he wanted the scarf. He made about twenty or so loops and then said, “I think that’s good?” He gave her a look that matched his questionable tone perfectly.

Mabel looked down at his work and grinned and nodded. “That looks great! Your scarf is gonna look so cute! Right, now to learn how to knit! This is a pretty basic stitch, but it’s a universal… nevermind, it’s an interdimensional stitch.” She joked. “Once you learn this you know the basics on how to make a bunch of stuff.”

“Okay, got it.” Ford held his opposite needle, excited to learn how Mabel can make clothes like magic by simply hitting two sticks together.

“Now, you see that big hole? The one the loop made?” Mabel asked, and when Ford nodded, she instructed, “Put your needle through that, just a little. Good, now loop the yarn around the new needle. Perfect! Now watch, this is the tricky part. There’s a second, smaller hole you need to pull your new needle through to make the knot. It’s right between the needle and the new loop. You poke it through, and pull. Watch me a few times, okay? You poke, loop, poke, and pull. Poke, loop, poke, and pull.”

“Hm,” Ford watched Mabel make a few stitches and tried to understand the smaller hole she was talking about. He gave it a try and thought he found the hole, but it was too tight and he couldn’t move his needle. He tried it again and found a looser hole he could work it, and when he pulled it made a stitch just like Mabel’s. Ford grinned and tried it again and was delighted to find it could do it successfully more than once. “I think I’ve got it…”

“You do!” Mabel watched him knit a few stitches and hugged him around the neck again. “I’m so proud of you, wow! Look at you go! Now just be careful not to split the yarn, like that. See, it’s okay, just unhook it, there you go. Now you just gotta do that over and over again. It’s kinda like typing, it’s easier the more you do it. Pretty soon you’ll be able to knit without looking!”

“Wow, this is incredible.” Ford marveled as he finished his first line and ran a finger over the stitches; it looked and felt like something Mabel would have made. “Thank you so much, sweetheart.”

“You’re welcome!” Mabel said as she knitted. “I’m just so happy you wanted to learn. Gotta be honest, I thought you’d never wanna knit.”

“Why is that?” He asked, generally curious as to why she would assume that. Had he accidentally given the wrong impression on the activity?

“Dipper tried it once and hated it.” Mabel giggled, but then looked kinda sad at the memory. “I tried to teach him, but he didn’t like the way he had to hold the needles and he couldn’t find the holes and eventually he got frustrated and quit. We hadn’t even finished the first lesson and he decided it wasn’t a Dipper-thing.”

Ford smiled sympathetically and guessed, “And so you predicted that it wouldn’t be a Ford-thing?”

Mabel shrugged apologetically and smiled sheepishly at him. “You and Dipper do like a lot of the same stuff.”

“It’s true that we’re very similar,” Ford admitted. “But we’re not complete copies of each other. I’m just grateful that one bad experience with a student hadn’t caused you to turn down another.” He smiled at her kindly and Mabel giggled and shook her head.

“Never ever. I’m glad you wanted to learn. I just hope you didn’t only wanna learn to spend time with me or cuz you thought I’d want you to. Not that I don’t wanna spend time with you! I do, but I want you to do stuff cuz you think it’s fun, you know?”

“No no, I understand.” Ford nodded. “I truly did want to try to make sweaters and scarfs and hats. It’s true that you inspired me, but I generally was intrigued by the activity and wanted to give it a try.”

“Well, I’m glad you did.” Mabel said matter-of-factly and gently stopped Ford when he made an incorrect knot and helped him fix it.

As the morning waned on and the day dragged on, despite Mabel leaving to do other things, Ford stayed on that couch knitting. He was very slow and constantly made mistakes, but he felt like he was getting the hang of it and he was having so much fun and was determined to finish what he had in mind. While all he had said to Mabel was true, there was another reason why he had wanted to learn how to knit so badly.

Mabel let his uncle enjoy the new hobby and occasionally praised him and reminded him that if he needed help all he had to do was ask. She said goodnight to him as he continually knitted on that couch and she requested that he not pull an all-nighter. Ford promised he wouldn’t, so Mabel went into her shared bedroom with Dipper for the evening.

The next morning Mabel was yawning into her hand as she cheerfully walked to the kitchen for some orange juice. She was surprised and disappointed to find her Grunkle Ford sipping coffee at the table. Just by looking at his eyes and the way he was sitting and inhaling the coffee Mabel could tell that Ford did not get a full-night’s rest.

“Grunkle Ford, you promised me you wouldn’t pull an all-nighter.” She scolded.

“I didn’t. I just woke up from a nap.” Grunkle Ford said cheerfully. “And good morning to you, as well.”

Mabel rolled her eyes at his cheekiness and she asked, “And how long was your nap?”

“Half an hour.”

“Grunkle Ford!” Mabel whined.

“I’m sorry, Mabel,” Ford chuckled amusingly. “But I was working on something very important.”

“Oh yeah, like what?” She asked as she opened the fridge.

“How about a gift for my favorite niece?”

Mabel turned around with the carton of juice in her hand and stared as Ford pulled a wrapped present up from his lap and onto the table.

Mabel had a tradition of making sweaters for Ford and wrapping them and placing them on his couch-made-bed. She would use tons of glitter and a big bow and would sometimes cut the wrapping paper too short and have to cut a second piece to tape over the hole. When Stan and Ford were out sailing and Mabel had to mail them the blankets and sweaters and hats and scarves and gloves and socks she had made them, she filled each and every box with glitter and included handmade cards and drawings and she always put everything she got into her gifts. As you can imagine, when Mabel caught wind that they were sailing in the Arctic Ocean, she was terrified of her favorite old people in the world getting cold and she made it her life;s mission to keep them warm even if she couldn’t hug them.

Ford desperately wanted to do the same for her. In his mind it was so unfair that she had never experienced the overwhelming joy of having someone make something so beautiful just for you. Ford wanted to make something for her he knew she loved and to take the time to wrap it and make it nice for her and to give it to her, not for a holiday or celebration, but just because she deserved it and Ford wanted to do something nice for her.

Mabel put the orange juice on the counter and slowly walked to the table. The present was wrapped in holiday wrapping paper that had reindeer and pine trees all over it. Ford’s math skills really came in handy, seeing how the present was beautifully wrapped, but it had a huge red bow on it and Ford used his really pretty cursive handwriting to spell out on a tag, “For my beautiful Mabel.” Mabel almost felt as if the gift was too pretty to unwrap. Almost. With trembling hands she quietly tore the paper for the gift while Ford rested his cheek on his knuckles and soaked in that star-struck look on Mabel’s face. Totally worth it.

Ford felt a small twinge of worry that she wouldn’t like the gift, but he quickly shoved that away. He wasn’t going to let his insecurities ruin this for himself. Mabel gasped and covered her mouth with shiny brown eyes as she stared at the gift. Really, compared to what Mabel could have done, it was half-decent at best. But it was still a nice scarf. Sure, there is an imperfection here and there, and the ends of the clothing material were bland with no fancy tassel or anything. It was clearly homemade, but the blue yarn was still pretty and the stitches were well made. Not bad for a first attempt, really not bad at all.

However, for Mabel, that scarf was the best gift she had ever received. Ford was startled to see her crying, legitimately crying with sobs behind her hand and tears rolling down her face. “Oh no, Mabel, my dear, don’t cry. It’s alright.”

“It’s so… so beautiful.” Mabel croaked and let Ford scoop her up into his arms. His warm chuckle rumbled against her chest as Ford rubbed circles into her back and she held him tightly. It was stupid to be crying over a scarf, but Mabel knew she wasn’t just crying over the scarf. She sniffed and wiped her tears on Ford’s red sweater and huffed, “Y-You did such a g-g-good job. It’s s-s-so… so pretty.”

Ford’s face felt like it was on fire. He did rinse off when he had finished shaving with fire, right? “Well, credit should be given where credit is due. I learned that all from you, sweetheart.”

Mabel hiccuped a giggle through her tears. It took a moment or two for her to calm down, overwhelmed with gratitude and love, and eventually she wiped her face dry with a tissue Ford had given her and she gently scooped up the blue scarf with white freckles and wrapped it around her neck proudly. “I-I-Is this how I make you guys feel?” She asked.

Ford chuckled and shrugged. “As a matter-of-fact, yes.”

Mabel hugged her scarf and giggled, “Then maybe I should stop.”

Despite the fact that it was obviously a joke, Ford grabbed her by the arms and begged very seriously, “Please don’t ever stop.”

From that day forward Mabel didn’t take off the scarf. Ever. Ford was a little embarrassed when she wore it to bed and wore it with her sweaters and skirts, but he was mostly very thankful she loved it so much. If it was too hot she would rather take off her sweater and wrap it around her waist than take off her gift, and once when she was having a bad day Dipper caught her in Scarfville instead of Sweatertown. When the summer ended Dipper sent the grunkles the new high-schoolers’ first day of school picture and Mabel proudly wore her grunkle’s scarf with her legging, skirt, and t-shirt.

Ford continually worked to improve his knitting and by the time summer came to a close Mabel was able to teach him how to knit a sweater. It took a lot of practice to get it right, but he was immensely proud when he could finally mail her a beautiful sweater that had a Milky Way galaxy on it. Ford was delighted when she texted a picture of her wearing it with a wet smile on her face and the fluffy gifts between the two just kept coming.

[storybookwolf]

Everybody Loves Jonathan

[This is my contribution to Day 1 of @jancyweek2020. The theme is Family, so I’ve shown Jonathan getting to know the Wheelers as Nancy’s boyfriend. It’s set just after season 2. It’s shameless cutesy fluff, and I hope you enjoy it!]

Mike (November 1984)

Nancy had asked Jonathan to pick her up for school at 8.15. ‘Just wait in the car and I’ll come outside. If you come in we’ll get sucked into a vortex of a million question from my mom, and I’d prefer to make a clean getaway.’

He was doing what she’d asked, but he still felt like he was being kind of rude and weird, loitering outside of a girl’s house. Especially since he’d arrived twenty minutes early. He sat there, trying to read One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest but instead just scanning the same paragraph over and over without absorbing it and repeatedly glancing at the Wheeler house for signs of life.

Finally, at 8.04, the front door opened, and he felt all the tension drain out of his body. It was instantly replaced by confusion, however, when he saw Mike emerge from the house and come running towards his car.

‘Jonathan! Hey, Jonathan!’ the middle schooler yelled, wrenching open the door and throwing himself into the backseat. ‘How’s Will? Is he okay? When’s he coming back to school?’

Jonathan smiled. He was so glad that his little brother had someone who cared about him this much. ‘He’s doing a lot better, but I think Mom’s gonna keep him at home for a few more days.’

Mike grinned. ‘Awesome. That he’s better, I mean. It sucks that he has to stay home.’ Then he leaned back in his seat and looked at the older boy, suddenly serious. ‘So are you, like, Nancy’s boyfriend now?’

Jonathan felt himself start to blush (he hated when that happened). ‘Um…yeah, I guess? I think so. Has she said anything about it?’

‘She refuses to answer any questions,’ said Mike. ‘It’s cool if you are, though. She always seems happier when you’re around.’ He shrugged. ‘So are you dating or what?’

Before Jonathan could answer, the passenger door opened.

‘Hey, you’re early!’ said Nancy. She leaned over and kissed him. It was just a peck on the lips, but Mike started to make gagging noises as though they were full-on making out in front of him.

‘Ugh, why are you guys so gross?’

*

Karen (November 1984)

Nancy checked her reflection in the bedroom mirror for the twentieth time. Should she change her earrings? The hoops had seemed like a good idea, but her curls just kept getting tangled in them. She decided to switch them for tiny gold studs. The rest of the outfit was okay – navy tights, denim skirt, the peach argyle sweater that Jonathan had said he liked. She knew it was silly to be nervous about their first ‘real date’, given that they’d been together for three weeks now (and given everything they’d been through before that), but she couldn’t help but be a little anxious.

And the fact that he was late was only making her more nervous. It wasn’t like him, he was usually either early or exactly on time. Frowning, Nancy grabbed her jacket and purse and decided to wait downstairs … where she found her boyfriend in the Wheeler family kitchen, helping her mother unpack groceries.

‘The tuna fish goes on the third shelf down, and the spaghetti has its own special Tupperware, on the top shelf,’ Karen directed. ‘Oh, hi Nancy!’ she said when she noticed her daughter. ‘Jonathan pulled up just as I was unloading the car, and very kindly offered to give me a hand with all this.’

Of course he did, thought Nancy with a smile.

‘What are you two up to tonight?’ her mother asked.

‘We’re seeing a movie at the Hawk. Actually, it starts pretty soon, so we should probably get going,’ Nancy said, taking Jonathan’s hand and starting to pull him out of the kitchen.

‘Okay, have fun! Make sure you’re home by midnight,’ said her mom.

‘Isn’t your curfew usually 11?’ Jonathan murmured once they were out of earshot.

‘I guess you doing grocery duty gets us an extra hour,’ said Nancy, grinning.

*

Holly (December 1984)

It didn’t take long for Jonathan to become a fixture at the Wheeler house. He’d bring Nancy home from school and stay to study with her. He’d come over for Sunday lunch and weeknight dinners. He’d arrive an hour early to pick up Will from D & D, and spend the time sampling whatever Karen’s latest baked creation was. And wherever he went, he had a shadow: Holly.

The youngest Wheeler seemed to think that Jonathan was actually there to visit her, and therefore it was her job to entertain him. So she’d show him her latest drawings, and make him play dolls with her, and insist that he watch her favourite cartoons. And Jonathan always played along, engaging with the pre-schooler on her level in a way that Nancy found ridiculously adorable. But after a while, it started to grate. She just wanted to spend time with her boyfriend, and it was deeply weird to have to compete with her baby sister for his attention.

Which was why Alan Stavinsky’s retirement dinner seemed like such a great opportunity. He had been her dad’s boss at the insurance company for nearly twenty years, so her parents wouldn’t dream of missing it, even though it was being held all the way in the city and was bound to be a late night. So they’d need Nancy to babysit – she could invite Jonathan over, and once Holly went to bed they would have some privacy.

But Holly just refused to go to sleep. There was yelling, and tears (from both Wheeler sisters). Eventually, the younger girl was persuaded to put on her pyjamas and get into bed. Three bedtime stories later, she reluctantly agreed it was time for lights out.

‘At last!’ said Nancy, snuggling into Jonathan’s side on the couch. ‘I thought she’d never leave us alone. Now, how should we spend the rest of the night?’

‘Do you have any more Berenstain Bears books? I’m pretty hooked,’ Jonathan deadpanned.

‘I have a better idea,’ said Nancy. ‘How about we—’

‘I can’t sleep!’ a small voice announced from the doorway of the living room. ‘Jonathan, play Hungry Hippos with me!’

Nancy managed to stifle a groan of frustration as her boyfriend turned away from her and towards the little girl.

‘I think Hungry, Hungry Hippos might be a little too exciting for after bedtime,’ he said. ‘Let’s make a deal. Do you promise to go back to bed and stay there if we watch ten minutes of one of your Strawberry Shortcake videos?’

‘The Christmas one?’ she asked.

‘Sure.’

‘Okay!’ Holly bounced over to the couch and squeezed in between Nancy and Jonathan.

Nancy dutifully put on the video and went to the kitchen to get a glass of water, hoping to miss as much of the nauseatingly sweet cartoon as she could. When she returned a few minutes later, her little sister had finally fallen asleep – and so had Jonathan.

Sighing, Nancy switched off the TV and settled into the La-Z-Boy with one of her mom’s Cosmopolitan magazines. So much for a perfect night with her boyfriend.

*

Ted (January 1985)

It was the last day of winter break. Jonathan and Nancy had spent the afternoon hanging out at her house, doing nothing much at all.

‘Are you sure you don’t want to stay for dinner?’ Nancy asked as they said goodbye at the front door.

‘I’m sure,’ he said, leaning in for a quick kiss. ‘I told Will I’d help him with some art project tonight. Besides, your family is probably sick of having me around.’

‘Not at all! They love you,’ Nancy protested.

Just then, Ted Wheeler walked by, the newspaper under his arm and his evening scotch in hand. ‘Good night, Steven,’ he said, nodding at Jonathan.

‘Um…Good night, sir,’ said Jonathan. Nancy buried her face in his shoulder, trying to contain her laughter until her dad left the room.

‘Okay, so most of them love you,’ she said. ‘Me especially.’

Jonathan paused at that, and raised one eyebrow in an unspoken question. Really? He didn’t have to ask; it was clear from her fixed gaze on him that she meant it.

‘I love you too,’ he said.

[willow-salix]

(Fluffember Prompt : Picnic)

Day 5 of Isolation on Tracy Island 2.0

“Are you going to eat all that yourself?” Gordon asked as he sidled up to me in the kitchen. I was making noodles, nice, simple, stir fried noodles, a little bit of chicken, some veg and a sweet and sour dippy sauce. Lush.

“No,”  I answered. There was clearly far too much for me to eat alone, I had a Space Hubby around here somewhere… or possibly up there somewhere, it was hard to tell.

“Oh, cool, can I ha-”

“No.”

Cue the pout, the epic Gordo pout. I am immune. I never thought I would ever be able to say that, but I’ve grown stronger, more able to resist the bottom lip of doom. Just about. I remember that I tried that once with John, and his exact words had been “Don’t even try, that won’t work on me, I’m immune, I have two younger brothers.” I’d thought his confident speech had been all bravado and false hope, but he might have actually been telling the truth, my pouts rarely worked on him and the ones that the terrible two dished out never did. Was my man secretly a god? I mean, I thought so, I’d seen him with his top off, but maybe, just maybe he had hidden talents. Hmmm…

“You’ve got that look on your face again.”

“What look?” I asked, needing to clarify his meaning so I could decide if I needed to be insulted or not.

“The one you get when you’re staring at John or that guy from that old TV show, the Scottish one with the time travel.”

“Jamie Fraser is the most perfect of men, he is the ultimate in husband goals, he is…” I trailed off and shrugged. “I obviously have a thing for hot redheaded men.” 

“Urghh,” he made a face similar to the one that Scott made when Alan shoved his shoe under his nose last week. Like he wanted to throw up but wasn’t sure which way to aim.

“Why are you in here anyway?” I asked. “Was it just so you could bug me and judge me? I’m busy here, I’m trying to cook.”

He snorted, a scoffing little noise that was quite rude.

“What now?” I sighed.

“Cooking isn’t that hard.”

“Oh really? Then why is it that barely anyone in this house seems to be capable of it? It’s not just a case of grabbing some random ingredients, tossing them in a pot with a prayer for luck and you’re good to go.”

He declined to comment and wandered off without another word. I should have been terrified, but my bean sprouts were trying to burn so I pushed it aside to worry about later. That was my first dumb move.

My second dumb move was to actually leave the comfort of the couch and John’s recently vacated warm spot.

“What the everloving crap was that?” I yelped when a loud crash sounded from the kitchen below us. I poked John gently when he failed to react. “Did you hear that?”

“Since I’m not deaf, it would have been impossible for me not to,” he casually swiped something away on his tablet and started reading again.

“What did they do?” 

“And since I do not, in fact, have the ability to see through walls, I don’t know.”

“Go and find out.”

You’d have thought I was asking him to go shopping with me again.

“I don’t think so, you go.”

“They’re your brothers.”

“You’re the one that cares.”

“They’re your brothers,” I repeated.

He gave me that look of his that promises retribution as I rolled sideways to let him get up, rolling back to steal his spot the second he moved. I dragged his blanket over my knees (I’m feeling chilly today) and stole his tablet to watch videos on as he walked away. 

I got so engrossed, having fallen down a hole of cute hamster videos, that I didn’t realise for a full twenty minutes that John had failed to return. I had sudden and very detailed visions of my poor boy hogtied and left baking in the sun or some such nonsense. I unwrapped myself from my blanket burrito and started my very slow and reluctant walk towards the kitchen. 

“What are you doing?” I yelled the second I rounded the corner, entered the room and saw the scene before me. They all froze guiltily, including John, who was at that very second groping blindly around in the pantry. And when I say blindly, I mean it literally, he was wearing a blindfold that by the looks of it, had been made by them tying my shawl around his head. I don’t know what they were thinking, if anything I’m a little surprised that I’ve never seen smoke coming out of their ears when their two remaining brain cells rub together to give them an idea.

The other idiots were all standing around in various places, standing guard over small piles of produce like dragons over their gold. 

“What the hell is going on in here? And how the hell have you roped him in?”

“Hang on, he’s got twenty more seconds yet,” Alan told me, clicking a button on his comm again. “Go!”

John resumed his digging around, knocking over two jars of mustard and an open packet of pasta which poured out like a carby waterfall. He ignored it.

“Gordon?” I turned to the likely culprit.

“Why are you picking on me?” he asked innocently. "Why do you always assume it's my doing?" 

“Are you honestly trying to tell me that you had nothing to do with this?  Whatever this actually is.”

“We’re having a picnic,” Virgil told me.

“It’s blindfolded kitchen shopping,” Kayo elaborated. I switched my glare to her, she was involved, I could tell, mostly because she still had one of her workout head wraps around her neck and had her own pile of goodies on the counter in front of her.

“It was Scott’s idea,” Alan piped up, throwing his brother under the bus. “Time!”

John dropped the item in his left hand, retaining the one in his right and backed out of the pantry. He pulled off his blindfold and gathered up his treasures, a bag of donuts, a can of whipped cream and in his hand a tin of spaghetti hoops.

“What was Scott’s idea?”

“Well, when you told me that cooking was easy-” 

“I said no such thing. I told you that it wasn’t as simple as just bunging some ingredients in a…” I trailed off, I could already see where this was going and I wasn’t impressed.

“Exactly, throw some ingredients together and make food. Easy.”

“Not easy,” I insisted.

“So I happened to mention it to Scott, who said that he agreed, you can make anything if you’re creative enough-”

“You should not be learning from the Grandma Tracy school of cookery!”

“The rules are simple,” Gordon continued as if I had never spoken. “One minute to select three ingredients, all of which must be used in the finished dish. You’re allowed to add two more ingredients to aid the construction but that’s all. You can do whatever you want with what you have, be as elaborate or as simple as you like. You must taste your own dish, as does everyone else when everything will be shared as a picnic.”

He looked so damned proud of himself, the little snot.

“How did the rest of you numpties get involved in this?” I sighed, knowing I was beaten. No one answered me. Giving up, my blanket nest calling me, I retreated towards the door.

“Do you want to join in?” Virgil asked innocently.

“No, I really don’t.”

“Do you not have as much faith in your cooking skills as we do in ours?” Alan teased. 

I paused in the doorway.

“Dare you, unless you’re scared,” Kayo threw in, just to stir the pot.

“Dammit!” She knew exactly what she was doing, I can NEVER resist a dare.

“Gimme a blindfold.”

Alan tossed me his, which I think was a football sock, but I didn’t want to look at it too closely, I just prayed it was clean. I tied it around my head and Scott checked to make sure I couldn’t see anything. I don’t know what he did, because obviously I couldn’t see anything, but it made a few of them snigger, so I’m obviously suspicious.

Alan started the timer and I groped my way around the table to the fridge.

“Forty-five seconds!”

Crap! This was actually pretty stressful. How did you pick something without seeing it? I decided to stick to one place and hope for the best, open the fridge, feel around, grab some bits, done! Right?

Easier said than done when you have recently gone shopping, the fridge is packed to bursting and you can’t tell what anything is.

“John! Grab this!” I demanded as Alan happily started counting down from twenty as my time ticked away. I grabbed something small and weird, no idea what it was and tossed it over my shoulder in what I guessed was his general direction, hoping he caught it.

I fumbled around and selected something round and cold, that I hoped might be a tomato and held that out too, then in desperation I yanked out a random box just as Alan called time.

I pulled off my blindfold and looked at the things John was holding for me, which turned out to be an apple and a tiny radish. I was holding a carton of eggs. Could have been worse.

“Let the food prep begin,” Gordon declared. “No helping each other.”

Sighing I got to work. Obviously, eggs would be my main ingredient, I cracked four into a bowl and whisked them together. 

“Do we have to use all of the ingredients we picked out?” I asked.

“Yes, every one.”

“No, I meant do I have to use the entire apple or the entire box of eggs,” I clarified.

“Oh, no you don’t, it just has to have them in there.”

“Cool, OK, and we get two extra ingredients of our choice?”

“Yep.”

“Cool.” That was me sorted then. I grabbed a grater and shredded a quarter of the apple and less than an eighth of the tiny radish. I wasn’t a big fan of those spicy little buggers, I don’t like pepper and they definitely have a peppery quality to them, but I was hoping the sweetness of the apple would balance it out.

I opened the fridge again and selected some cheese which I shredded and some ham, chopping it up quite fine. That would do.

I set a pan on the stove top and waited for it to heat up.

“Do I get to use any kind of oil or something to stop my food sticking?” I asked.

The ringleaders, Gordon and Scott, looked at each other, obviously indulging in some kind of non-verbal conversation I wasn't privy to before making their decision.

“Yes you can,” Scott graciously allowed.

“Thank you.” I dumped in a generous knob of butter. Quickly I sloshed the eggs into the pan, and fluffed them up a little with a fork before I turned the heat down a bit and let them sizzle.

I glanced over at Alan who was constructing something with jam and a pile of cookies. Scott was wrestling with a can of tuna and Gordon was opening a carton of custard.

I sprinkled a little of the apple on top of the egg, then a tiny dusting of radish, followed by a large handful of cheese and ham. I eased the sides of my omelette away from the pan, making sure it wasn’t sticking and checking it was cooking.

John, I noticed, was doing something weird with a lettuce leaf that he had procured from somewhere, it was not one of his blindfolded items so he must have gotten it after. He had the leaf stretched over a small bowl and was spooning a tiny amount of the tinned spaghetti into it. Sometimes I wonder why I agreed to marry into this family. I must have been drunk.

I carefully folded my omelette in half and turned the heat off, letting it rest and continue cooking a little.

“I’m done,” I declared, turning around to survey the chaos that had become our kitchen. Oh the humanity. I would NOT be cleaning this up.

Alan, it transpired, had blindly chosen cookies, cheese slices and curry sauce left over from some McDonald’s nuggets I got a few weeks ago, bringing them and other goodies with me in the space elevator. His extras appeared to involve pilfering a few of the McVities digestive biscuits that I’d brought from home the day I arrived that Kayo had chosen in her blind scrabble around the snack cupboard. 

He’d proceeded to make a weird stacked thing he was calling a cookie burger which consisted of a cookie base, a layer of jam on top of that, the digestive and lastly a slice of cheese with a drizzle of curry sauce on top.

Gordon was constructing something very elaborate, involving a bowl and lots of layers. His random items appeared to be the custard, half a vanilla sponge cake and a tub of left over chili. My mind was boggling. 

Scott was hacking at a rather stale looking half loaf of bread that John said he found in the rarely used bread bin, I don't know how he'd managed to open the bread bin without seeing it, but apparently he had. He'd also blindly chosen a can of Tuna and a packet of fruit gummies. 

Virgil, the adorable chonk, had managed to choose a package of cocktail weenies, a tin of peaches and a few sticks of celery. He had stared at his bounty for a good few minutes, before giving up and wandering over to the pantry. He'd stared into that too, like he was looking into a black hole or contemplating the mysteries of the universe. 

Eventually he'd chosen a pie crust from the baking shelf and had begun to assemble his creation. He tipped the peaches into the pie dish, chopped up the celery and cocktail sausages and dropped them in on top. He'd looked around, rather desperately I thought, and reached over to steal John's can of whipped cream, squirting a generous amount on top of his frankenpie and called it good. 

Kayo appeared to have more sense than the others, she had been the one to find my stash of digestive biscuits and, after Alan had liberated a few, proceeded to crush them into crumbs which she lined the inside of a bowl with.

"What are you making?" I asked, because it didn't look too awful. 

She continued to construct her…whatever it was…adding some cake pilfered from Gordon, some grated carrot mixed into cream cheese that was one of her chosen extras and topping it all with strawberries. It kinda…vaguely…could be a cheesecake, if you tipped your head to the side and squinted. 

I turned to John, my man, the one that I was supposed to trust with all my heart and soul…he was…I don't know how to describe it. He'd taken the donut and hollowed out a little bit more from the middle hole, then he'd gathered up the sides of his lettuce leaf/ spaghetti hoops thing and had made it into a little parcel, twisting the end closed. He then popped that inside the hollowed out donut. I have no idea why. He'd finished by decorating the top with whipped cream and sprinkles. What was it with them all thinking that whipped cream was the answer to all their problems? Because three of them had done it so far. 

Gordon had sprinkled in a handful of peas, actual peas, on top of his custard layer, then added cream on top. I honestly don't know. 

Scott had moved on from his bread and taken some of John's lettuce, insisting it was his first, and put a leaf on the stale bread and topped that with Tuna and sweetcorn, which actually had the potential to taste OK. Time would tell. He'd used the fruit gummies to decorate the plate with, I'm not sure if that counted but since he and Gordon seemed to be in charge I assumed it was allowed. 

I slid my omelette onto a plate and vaguely wondered if I should grab a few sick bags before the picnic portion of this weird event started. 

They all looked incredibly proud of themselves, why I had no idea, no one should be proud of the mess they had made, this was not food, this was barely a step up from mud pies in the yard. 

They all took their food offerings and trooped outside, setting up camp on one of the picnic benches near the edge of the beach and settled in. 

One by one they presented their masterpieces. Here are the reactions.

SCOTT’S

“This bread’s hard, very hard,” Alan said.

“It’s very fishy,” Gordon said, although we don’t know if it was a bad thing or not.

“Not bad, I could eat it if I had to,” Virgil allowed.

“I don’t like the sweetcorn on it, it keeps rolling away,” John frowned. He was always a bit funny with tinned sweetcorn anyway, he prefers it on the cob.

“That isn’t just hard bread, that is rock bread,” Kayo complained.

“It’s edible, with fresh ingredients I’d eat it again,” I said, trying to be nice. Honestly it wasn’t that bad, I’d definitely eaten worse over the years.

“It’s almost exactly like the subs we made in college,” Scott said, popping the rest in his mouth and chewing happily. He’s weird, that one, he pretends he’s not, he offers the illusion of being the capable, responsible older brother, but it’s all an act.

ALAN’S

“Erm…” Scott hedged, spending at least a minute turning the thing in his hand looking for a way to attack it.  

“I don’t know what to do with this, Al…” Virgil was even less sure.

“Give it here!” I had less issues and snatched it away from Scott. I ripped off a bit of the curry sauce topped cheese slice, licked the sauce off the cheese, popped the cheese in my mouth then took a bite of the sweet stuff. It was hard to get my teeth through all the layers of biscuit, but I managed it. It was actually OK, separating it was the way to go. “That’s actually quite nice.”

John copied me exactly, because I’m the sensible one although he’d never admit to that. “You’re right, it’s not bad.”

 “Wimps,” Gordon bit straight through it, cheese, curry and all. Then he gagged.

Kayo took the cheese off her’s, ate the sweet stuff first then finished with the cheese, an unconventional method but it wasn’t like any of this was normal. She made a noise that could have been approval but could just as easily been a whimper of surrender.

Virgil took the whole thing apart and ate everything separately, one piece at a time, declaring it to be, “Not bad.”

Scott glanced at me with that look in his eye that said he was about to do something stupid… He reached for the curry sauce pot… 

“Scott, no!” I warned him.

He ignored me to tip the rest of the curry sauce on top of the cheese and threw it in his mouth. Immediately he let out a noise that sounded like a mixture between a gag and a burp. He chewed frantically then swallowed. We waited to see what would happen. “Not deadly,” was his verdict.

VIRGIL’S

“I’m sorry, no, I’m not eating that,” I told them, flat out refusing.  “I’m semi allergic to peaches, they give me migraine headaches and I’m not risking it. I’m out.”

“I’m excused because she can’t eat peaches and I won’t risk cross contamination,” John said, leaping on my statement as a way to get out of it.

“That’s a flimsy excuse!” Scott accused, he knew it, John knew it, we all knew it. John didn’t care.

“You’re just mad that you can’t use it,” John said, squeezing my leg under the table in thanks for my weird kinda-allergy. I patted his hand in solidarity.

“No one has to eat it, I did my best,” Virgil winced, knowing that his was likely to be the most disastrous yet.

“I’m in!” Gordon declared, picking out a cocktail weenie and dunking it in the cream before popping it in his mouth. He chewed frantically as he scooped up a spoonful of pie crust, peaches and a slice of celery and shoveled that in after the weenie. He kept chewing, his face registering at least six different emotions, none of them pleasant before he finally swallowed. “It could have been worse.”

Kayo copied Gordon and picked out a weenie which she ate first, on its own.  That’s where she got smart, washing it down with a mouthful of water before continuing. She spooned up some pie, peach, celery and cream concoction and tasted it. “Not bad like this, the celery is a slightly weird addition, but it can be ignored.”

“I feel sick,” Alan said, having shoved a large mouthful in. 

Scott, the brave boy that he is, shrugged and cut a whole slice, lifting it carefully to his mouth.

“He’s a madman…” Alan whispered in awe.

“A brave man…” Gordon added.

“A stupid man…” I sighed.

Scott bit into it, chewing slowly, rolling it around his mouth. “It’s fine.”

I stared at him in utter shock.

Virgil nibbled on a corner, made a face and pushed it away. “No.”

GORDON’S

“What the heck is this?” he of the iron stomach and nuclear powered taste buds asked.

“It’s that thing they did in that show,” Gordon answered, yet Scott still looked bemused, as did we all, blank faces all round.

“Which show, babe?” I felt the need to ask.

“The one with the friends in the coffee shop.”

“You mean ‘Friends’?”

“If that’s what it’s called,” he shrugged. “It’s a meat trifle.”

Cue horrified gasps all around.

“With a few modifications, obviously, since I had to use chili,” he hurried to explain, although it was anything but reassuring.

John pushed his fork into the center of the dish, looking more and more scared the deeper it sank.

“Don’t eat it and just say you did,” I side whispered to him, worried about his stomach since he usually lived on simple and non perishable food in Five.

“I heard that!” Gordon accused as he spoons up a big bite, determined to prove it was edible, and chowed down. “Huh…” he kept chewing, “not bad…”

“Not bad?” Scott goggled. “Are you serious?”

“The chili is good, the custard is good, the cream is nice, the peas are a bit weird but overall it's OK.”

Virgil was the next brave soul to scoop up a tiny forkful and I did the same getting the smallest amount I could onto my spoon, mostly trying to get just custard and cream, although I think I did spot a lurker pea in there.

Kayo and Alan both scooped up a spoonful and shoved it in their mouths, obviously figuring that getting it over with was the best way to tackle it. Kayo spat hers out instantly, Alan managed to chew and swallow his. Virgil got his down but there was a fair bit of gagging.

“It tastes like a foot,” Alan declared.

John took a small bite and reacted almost like a cat with a hairball, his body shuddering, neck stretching as he silently gagged. I handed him a tissue and he gratefully spat it out, sagging against me as if he was about to die.

I looked at Scott, who nodded in return and dug out his own small amount. “On three?”

Scott nodded and began the count. “One...two...three!” We both stuffed our spoons into our mouths. Scott made a face but managed to get it down, my plan had worked and, while the pea was indeed lurking and rather weird, it wasn't that bad a bite and I swallowed without issue, pleased to have survived.

MINE

“This doesn’t look too bad,” Scott said assessingly.

“How dare!” I gasped. “Cheek of it, it looks tasty.”

Virgil cut himself a small portion, being cautious, since everything else has been questionable at best, downright disgusting at worse. 

Gordon cut himself an actual slice, a godsdamned slice of my omelette and lifted it up like he would a piece of pizza then wondered why we were all staring at him like he’d lost his mind.

“What?” he asked, genuinely confused. John just shook his head in utter despair at his dingus brothers and cut a more sensible sized bite. 

“I’m sure it will be edible,” he says diplomatically, it’s never good to insult the wife’s cooking even when it is so obviously crap.

Alan, disaster child that he is, cut a bit with the side of his spoon like a damned savage and spooned it up.

Kayo helped herself to a small fork full and got ready.

I reached over and broke a piece off of Gordon’s mega slice. 

“OK, good luck my friends,” I offered as I popped the eggy weirdness in my mouth… it was interesting. Nowhere near as bad as I thought it would be, the cheese and ham had mostly drowned out the spicy kick of the radish and the apple had added a weird sweetness to it, but at least it was edible if not to my tastes. I managed to chew it and swallow without choking.

“That’s oddly nice,” John said, chewing slowly, thoughtfully. 

“Well, you are the person that likes baked apple pieces on your pizza,” I shuddered in revulsion at the memory of his birthday meal.

“What a man chooses to put on his pizza is his own business,” he told me.

“Not when it’s that weird.”

“It’s no weirder than pineapple on pizza.”

“He’s right,” Scott interrupted, “this is strangely OK.” He took another bite to make sure.

“I don’t like it, it’s too sweet,” Alan said, making a face. “ I like sweet, but not mixed with savoury like this.”

“I agree,” Virgil said, setting his aside, “it’s too sweet, but you did your best.”

Gordon didn’t say anything, but he was steadily munching through his piece, I watched him, oddly fascinated.

“It’s edible, that’s all I can say about it,” Kayo told me, which for her was a compliment.

“Well? Verdict?” I asked Gordon when he eventually finished.

“I don’t know. I don’t like it or dislike it, it just is.”

“You’re being philosophical over a weird omelette?” Scott laughed.

“Had to happen some time.”

“How? How did it have to happen?” John asked, utterly bemused, looking like his brain was going into a meltdown. “Who says to themselves ‘one day I will have to say something deep and meaningful about a randomly concocted omelette’? How do you even assume that?”

“I never say never,” Gordon shrugged, not caring to explain any further. Personally I don’t think he knew what he meant either but was just brazening it out by that point.

JOHN’S

I picked up his donut creation a little gingerly, because I saw what he’d done to it and I was wary. He obviously saw my hesitation because he lent closer to help.

“Just be careful with it and follow my instructions,” he whispered in my ear under the guise of being romantic.

One eyebrow rose in response...I mean, what do you say to that?

He continued, still whispering. “Bite down gently and try to avoid the sack,” he dropped a kiss on my neck before sitting back in his seat. Smooth, boy, very smooth. My other eyebrow lifted to join its sibling.

“I’m just trying to help,” he assured me.

“You’ve said that before.”

“And you listened then and look how well it turned out,” he said as if that was all the proof I needed.

I heard a snigger from Gordon who was obviously eavesdropping. 

“I was referring to the fact that you often use the excuse of just trying to help,” I sniffed.

“Oh...well…” he tried to look innocent but failed, flashing me one of those devastating grins that just melted me on the spot. “Just taste my damn donut.”

I debated the wiseness of listening to him but decided that, as trust is supposed to be the cornerstone of any good relationship, I should probably pay attention.

“OK, here we go,” I bit down carefully, right at the edge, trying to measure the distance between where my teeth were and the no go zone. I think I brushed the edge of the lettuce leaf but managed to stick to just the donut which, though ever so slightly stale, was still good.

“That’s nice,” I allowed, trying to keep my cover as I passed the donut over to John who took a bite in exactly the same way and therefore stayed safe.

He passed it on to Kayo, who had been watching us intently, studying our moves with her usual mix of suspicion and calculated plotting.

 “You’ve got some cream on your lip,” I was told and sat still while he wiped it away with his thumb.

“What do you think, Kay?” Scott asked. 

Kayo, having executed a perfect bite from the other side of the donut nodded before passing judgement. “Edible.” She was now fully on board with our trickery and would never rat us out as she passed it innocently on to Alan.

Alan, trusting baby that he is, bit blindly into the donut, hitting the lettuce sack which exploded, squirting spaghetti hoop juice into his mouth.

“GAAAH what the…” he yelped, gasping in shock, dropping the demon donut with its hidden core of evil.

Scott picked up the donut, the spaghetti sauce now leaking out freely and soaking into the dough. Uncaring he takes a bite. “Not gonna lie,” he mumbles around his mouthful, “it's not great.” 

Virgil relieved him of the donut and studied it from all sides. The artist in him wants everything to look appetizing and pleasant the whole time, this did not. “This looks hideous.” He nibbled a corner. “Disgusting,” he declared, offering it to Gordon.

Gordon reluctantly accepted it and bit down carefully. He chewed, swallowed and shook his head. “Nope, gross.” 

KAYO'S 

Kayo pushed her bowl over quite proudly. “Dig in.”

It didn’t look that bad, and since I’d seen a lot of what she used I knew the ingredients wouldn’t be that bad when mixed. Hopefully it wouldn't be the obnoxious assault to the tastebuds that some of them had been. 

I slammed my spoon  confidently into it and scooped out a mouthful, popping it in my mouth before I could back out.

“Humm…” I chewed thoughtfully, what did I actually think of it? I couldn’t decide so I just spoke my thoughts as I so often do. “It's quite nice. I mean, biscuit, cake and cream cheese is nice, I don't really like the carrot mixed in but it doesn't ruin it to the point of being disgusting. I like the strawberries, so I guess it’s a win.” 

John followed my lead, digging his spoon in. “That's pretty good.” 

“I really like that,” Scott dipped his spoon in for some more. “The carrot is different enough to not bore me but the rest is normal enough to make it nice.”

“It's too sweet for me,” Virgil said, putting his spoon down after his first taste. 

“I'm not liking the carrot but the rest is good, I could eat it,” Alan said, his usual aversion to vegetables or anything healthy rearing its ugly head. 

“It's all good. I don't mind the carrot either,” Gordon said, agreeing with Scott. 

Kayo, obviously emboldened after using us as test subjects, risked tasting it herself. “Not bad.” 

Well, we've tasted everything,” I said, glugging down some of John’s water in an attempt to cleanse my tongue a little. “Was there an actual point to all of this?” 

Scott and Gordon both shrugged, not that I was that surprised, there is never much point to anything that any of these idiots do when bored.

“Not really,” Scott admitted. 

“I wanted to prove you wrong,” Gordon told me, “and I think we did.” 

“How? How did you? Some of this was disgusting, it clearly didn't work. How can you honestly think that you proved my wrong in any way, shape or form?” Seriously, the mind boggles with these guys. 

“It showed that it can be done,” Gordon insisted.  

“It shows nothing!”  

“Just let it go, love,” John soothed, obviously trying to save what little sanity I have left.

“You joined in!”

“So did you,” he countered.

“I give up!” I yelled, throwing my hands up in frustration. “It’s like talking to monkeys, you’re all mental.” I climbed awkwardly off the bench and headed back to the house.

“So, did I win?” I heard Kayo ask as I rounded the corner, leaving them alone. 

Stupid competitive Tracys! I should never have left the sofa, hell, I should never have left England. I knew this would be a mistake. I’d be insane by the end of it.

I stopped off in the kitchen to make myself a coffee, hoping it would take some of the taste away. I grabbed a few abandoned cookies and a non Johned donut and retreated to the sanctuary that was the couch and my blankets, which would be lonely without me.

I settled down, retrieved my book (I’m re-reading Outlander, which might be contributing to my Jamie Fraser love right now, all the best husbands have J names, fact) and got comfy, might as well make the most of what little peace I’d get before the chaos found me.

“Move over.”

I stayed where I was, maybe if I ignored him he would go away.

John, being John and refusing to be either insulted or put off by my rejection, simply lifted my legs and settled in their spot, dropping them back down over his lap.

I looked over my book at him as he reached for my coffee cup and gulped down half its contents. He offered me the mug and I put my book down to take it.

“Thanks,” I said because what else could I do? I sipped the coffee then put the mug down on the little table next to the couch and picked up my book again.

John took that as a sign that he was welcome to stay and started making himself at home, stealing some of the blanket and shifting to stretch out beside me. I moved over to make room, letting him settle his head on my chest as he found his tablet among the cushions.

OK, maybe there were a few good reasons to be here instead of alone at home, but I’ll never admit it outloud.

[hollyxqx]

chained  //  yoongi  //  01

↪ PAIRING: Min Yoongi x Reader ↪ SUMMARY: Min Yoongi, a demon, has been ordered to protect you as punishment for his crimes; no matter what...and he's not happy about it. ↪ WORD COUNT: 6.3k 

↪ WARNINGS: dubious consent | blood | violence | attempted sexual assault | filthy demon sex

ONE | TWO | THREE

Her? Seriously?

Those were the first thoughts that entered Yoongi's mind when his target was revealed to him. He was sat on a chair in the courtroom with a guard on either side of him, each one had a hand on his shoulder to keep him in place. Not that he would have dared move, anyway. He had caused enough trouble, which had landed him in this precarious position in the first place. And now he was paying the price.

Being a demon there were rules and restrictions they had to follow; just like humans. Yoongi had broken not just one but many of them. He'd killed another demon. He'd killed an ancient demon, which was considered heinous. You were to respect your elders, not kill them. The ultimate sin. He was lucky he wasn't being obliterated.

Instead, his punishment was you.

Apparently you were important for a human. Just looking at you, Yoongi couldn't see why, you looked like every other human to him. But according to the Judge you were going to be the mother of a baby who allow demons to finally live freely on earth. Something his kind had strived for since being banished from the planet thousands of years ago. You were the one to change that. Allegedly.

He was ordered to protect you. At all costs. Your life was essentially in his hands. The last thing he wanted was this kind of responsibility, this burden. Especially considering if he failed and you died, he would too. A demon's death wasn't exactly painless either. It was far worse than any human could even imagine. It was the ultimate punishment.

"Do you have anything to say before you are banished to Earth?" The judge's voice reverberated throughout the room and straight through Yoongi. Even he found it frightening.

"No." Yoongi said, head hanging low. He had a smart mouth and did not trust himself to speak in that moment. Knowing him he would make it worse for himself.

"Then I hereby sentence you to protect the human Y/N. You may return when your task is complete."

With a pounding of the gavel, Yoongi's world went black as he was teleported to Earth to begin his prison sentence.

***

Earth always smelled strange to Yoongi. He had been here three times before, on hitman business of course, and it always smelled the same. Like humans, he thought to himself. Humans had a very distinct odour, it was their blood. They smelled metallic. Sometimes Yoongi could even smell their emotions, human pheromones were highly detectable by demons. Especially when they were scared or frightened, sometimes even when they were happy.

He had landed on the street that you lived on, but with nothing other than the clothes on his back. He looked down at his wrists. Tattoos had appeared around them, black intricate lace bands that looked pretty but were actually handcuffs, tying him to you. He peeked at his ankles, confirming his suspicion. Tattoos had appeared there too. Shackles to go with his handcuffs, he was a prisoner after all. He sighed. He needed to find some accommodation.

Instinctively he could sense you were near by. It must be part of the spell that was written within the tattoo. He assumed he would always be able to feel where you were and if you were in danger. He followed that feeling, walking to your apartment building. He would choose to stay here for convenience sake. If he had to save you at a moments notice at least he would be close by.

Yoongi walked in to the foyer. There was an office marked 'building manager' and he listened for a moment. His heightened sense of hearing allowing him to realise that no one was on the other side. He unlocked the door with force, breaking the handle as he did so and entered the room.

There was a filing cabinet to his right and he opened the top drawer and started rifling through. He was looking for a list of the building's tenants, for two reasons. One; he wanted to see if this definitely was your building and two; he wanted to see which would be the easiest apartment to take over. Ideally a single tenant. Dealing with a family would be...messy.

He hummed in satisfaction when he found exactly what it was looking for. His eyes quickly scanned the page and to his delight there Y/N L/N was. His instincts were right. Next he looked for his target. When he saw a single guys name in apartment 3B he knew that was where he would head next.

He put the file away and left the office, taking the stairs to the third floor. He reached 3B and knocked on the door. After a few seconds the door swung open and a middle aged man stood before him. "Hello," Yoongi said and used his powers to throw the man with extreme force backwards into his apartment. He hit the wall and instantly was unconscious. "Thanks for the apartment." Yoongi said, striding in and closing the door behind him.

Step one, completed.

***

You were struggling with your shopping bags as you awkwardly fumbled with the door to your building. It was your fault for going grocery shopping on an empty stomach. You practically bought everything in sight, your hunger getting the better of you. However, you managed to make it to the elevator and press the button for your floor. Just a few more minutes and you would be home and free of the heavy bags on your wrists.

You reached your apartment and as you struggled with the keypad one of your bags split open and the contents spilled all over the hallway. "Oh shit." You groaned at the mess. Carefully you placed the remaining bags on the floor and did your best to gather the spilled items. However one stray tin can had rolled away and you crept along after it.

"Does this belong to you?" An unknown hand had reached down and picked the can up, inspecting it with a smirk. His eyes went to you and he wiggled the can at you. You let out a slightly embarrassed laugh.

"Oh yes, guilty!" You smiled, standing up. "That's mine."

"Spaghetti hoops, huh?" He asked, grinning almost wickedly. Your face flushed with embarrassment and you cursed your impulse buying.

"I went shopping on an empty stomach, what can I say." He reached out and handed the can back to you. "Thanks."

"Do you need a hand with the rest?" He asked, gesturing to your shopping bags strewn on the floor.

"Oh no, it's ok, I got it. Thanks though." You replied with a wave of your hand.

"If you're sure..." He trailed off. "I'm new to the building. May I ask your name?"

"Welcome," You said brightly. "I'm Y/N. And you?"

His eyes flashed with something you didn't recognise and it made you uneasy.

"Yoongi."

***

Yoongi paced the length of his stolen apartment, mind ablaze. After meeting you in the flesh earlier that day he knew exactly why he had been assigned to you, of all humans. You weren't like the rest of them. He suddenly understood why you were so special. And it was all because he had an almost uncontrollable urge to eat you. He wanted to devour you slowly.

He'd never had that feeling for a human before, ever - and he had been around a lot of them. You didn't smell like any human he'd ever come across either. You smelled sweet. Like sugar. It was bizarre to him. He wasn't even aware that it was possible to feel this way about a human. To his knowledge it had never happened before. He couldn't even contact anyone in the demon world to ask for more information.

As he continued pacing he felt something strange in his chest. That's new, he thought. Was it you? He paused for a moment, closing his eyes trying to focus on the feeling. It was you. But it didn't feel good. Something was wrong.

Suddenly, he was overcome with the urge to find you as this new feeling in his chest worsened. He didn't know how he knew it but he was certain you were in danger. Immediately he left the apartment and just let his feet guide him, trusting his gut instinct. He made his way down the stairs and out the building. His chest was burning now, he knew you were close.

As he scanned the parking lot he spotted you. You were pressed up against the wall where the trash bins were, hidden away from the world and a man was holding you at gunpoint, trying to snatch your purse from you. Yoongi rushed over and using his demon strength he lifted the man by the scruff of his collar, easily pulling him off you. With his free hand he casually snatched the gun out of his hand, to prevent the man from doing any damage. Yoongi didn't miss the wide eyed look of shock on your face.

Yoon giacted on instinct, twisting the man's head, instantly snapping his spinal cord. He crumbled down to the ground in a heap, dead. You screamed.

"Are you ok?" Yoongi asked you. He could hear your heartbeat and the smell of your fear almost turned him on. It radiated from you, filling his nostrils and making his brain cloudy. You didn't reply. "Are you?" He urged.

"Y-y-you, you - he's d-dead." You stuttered, raising a shaky hand to point at the body. Yoongi hadn't even thought twice about killing the man. He was a demon. Killing humans was normal for him. They were weak and inferior, their lives didn't mean much to him.

"He was going to kill you." Yoongi stated the obvious.

"You can't just kill people!" You hissed. He shrugged.

"He was only human. Not much of a loss." He said simply. Your face twisted in confusion at his words. No one told him he couldn't tell you what he was. He wasn't breaking any rules....as far as he was aware. "How did this even happen?" He asked, gesturing to the body.

"He followed me home..." You whispered. Yoongi closed his eyes for a moment. You're trembling voice and frightened demeanour combined with the smell of you was threatening to overcome him. He needed to be in control and you were making it difficult. "Why did you do that?" You asked shakily.

His eyes slowly opened again. "To save you."

"How did you know where I was?" You looked at him with such large, innocent doe eyes it almost made him want to bite into your flesh there and then. If only you knew what a monster he was, you wouldn't be gazing at him like that.

"I felt it." He said, eyes hardening as he looked at you. You looked bewildered.

"You...felt it?" You queried. He nodded. "How?"

"I'm not what you think I am, Y/N." He said quietly. "Go inside. I'll get rid of him." You didn't move and it frustrated him. He strode over to you and in one swift move, picked you up and forcibly took you back in to the building. He ignored your cries to put you down until you were at the elevators. "Go home." He instructed, giving you one more stern look before walking away.

"Wait!" You shouted but he ignored you. He had a body to dispose of.

***

It had been hours since you made it home and your heart was still hammering in your chest. What you had just witnessed outside made you question everything about your strange new neighbour. He had said some incredibly odd things that you could not forget, no matter how hard you tried to push them out of your mind. Yet, without him there was a high chance you would have been six feet under now. The thought made you restless, doing nothing to calm your shaking hands.

You thought about trying to find Yoongi's apartment, in a wild attempt to pry any answers you could from the man. You realised, with a sigh, you had no idea which door belonged to him. You'd have to wait for another chance encounter, and even then, you weren't guaranteed anything.

You made yourself some tea and with trembling hands you wandered over to the window ledge. Looking at the night sky was always calming to you and you loved this little nook where you could sit in your apartment. All you wanted now was calmness, after the chaos of the earlier evening. However something caught your eye in the parking lot. It was Yoongi.

He was stalking across the concrete, almost prowling and you noticed something animalistic in the way that he moved. His shoulders were hunched slightly and his brow furrowed with what looked like fury. It sent a shiver through you. It was only when he crudely used the back of his forearm to wipe his mouth clean did you notice the blood on his face. It covered the whole lower half, spilling down on to his neck and shirt. Was he injured? What was going on?

It was as if he could feel your eyes on him. As if by magic he paused, looking up directly to your window. You gasped, spilling some tea on the ground as you leapt back, caught. How could he have possibly known you were standing there? It was late, and dark. Any normal person would be long asleep.

You waited a moment before cautiously leaning forward to peek out the window again, but he was gone.

***

Weeks turned in to months and although you didn't see Yoongi you never forgot about him. It was strange to you how he could just vanish like that and you even questioned that he might have moved out. You were just going to have to accept that this person did something heroic for you once upon a time and that was it. Part of you wanted to thank him but you'd never be able to.

You were sitting at the red light, fingers aimlessly drumming along to the car stereo as you hummed along with the song. You were in no real rush to get home so you didn't mind the wait. Suddenly, a banging on the window caused you to almost leap out your seat. You turned to the source of the noise, mouth falling agape when your eyes locked with Yoongi.

"Get out the car!" He practically screamed, banging furiously on the window. He tried to open the driver door but it was locked, the handle clicking adding to his frustration. You were utterly bewildered. "Y/N listen to me! You need to get out now."

You rolled the window down as you frowned in confusion. "What are you talking about?" You asked, incredulously.

Yoongi said nothing, leaning inside the open window and unlocking the door. He then proceeded to swing the drivers door wide open and made quick work of your seatbelt. He ignored your cries of protest, choosing to essentially rip you out of the car. In a moment you were in his arms being dragged to the pavement. "What the hell are you doing?!" You yelled, hitting your fists against his chest, struggling in his grip.

He said nothing, however your question was answered for you when a car came careering into the side of yours, crushing the metal where you had been sitting only moments ago. The sound of metal hitting metal rang in your ears and you gasped loudly in shock. "Saving your ass, again. You're welcome." Yoongi said almost smugly. He let go of you and you almost crumpled into a heap, legs weak from fright.

"H-how? How did you know?" Your voice was hoarse. You looked up at him wide eyed in terror.

"I felt that you were in trouble." Was his vague reply, much the same as the last time you had questioned him.

"That would have killed me." You stated the obvious. "You saved my life. Again."

"You're a fucking headache, you know that?" Yoongi said suddenly angry, pointing a finger at you. "You're the most troublesome human I've ever come across."

There he went using the word 'human' again, almost as if it was an insult. As if he wasn't human himself. "I didn't ask you to do that!" You retorted, matching his anger. "That was your choice!"

"It's not my fucking choice." He uttered darkly. His eyes narrowed at you. "Stay out of trouble, Y/N." And with that he turned to leave. You were quick this time though, reaching out to grab his forearm, stopping him in his tracks. He turned slowly to look at you.

"What does that mean?" You asked. He shook his head, refusing to answer. "Will you at least let me thank you properly this time?"

"How are you going to do that?" He scoffed, shrugging your arm off him.

"I was hoping you could tell me." You offered, somewhat shyly. You couldn't let him get away this time and disappear for months again. "Let me just sort out my car and I'll buy you coffee or food or something. Please."

You didn't care how desperate you sounded, you just need to make sure he wouldn't leave. He sighed, running a hand through his hair. "Fine, whatever."

***

Yoongi couldn't believe he was sitting opposite you in a fucking human coffee shop of all places. The only reason he'd even agreed to it, aside from the pitiful look on your face, was because he was getting bored living on earth. All he did was wait around for you to get in some petty human danger so he could step in and save the day. After months he'd had enough.

The two of you were sat in a quiet corner of the coffee shop as you sipped a latter. Yoongi had ordered as well but he didn't drink it, he just didn't want to pique your curiosity and invite awkward questions by not ordering anything. After all, you thought you were doing him a favour. He smirked to himself. Cute, he thought. Humans are dumb.

"Will you tell me how you knew where I was today?" You asked in a small voice, stirring your coffee absent mindedly. Yoongi audibly sighed.

"Call it intuition." He replied, watching you curiously. He'd never seen you in daylight before and he took the time to study your features. You were attractive, by human standards, that was for sure. His eyes roamed your face, down to your neck and he could see the veins there. It took everything in him not to lick his lips as he imagined his teeth sinking into your flesh.

"Intuition..." You repeated, your voice trailing off. "Is it the same intuition that brought you to me before? That night I was mugged?"

Yoongi nodded.

"You're like my guardian angel or something." You joked, letting out a little laugh.

"I'm no angel, Y/N." He said darkly. You watched him carefully. "Trust me."

"What are you?" You said quietly, eyes never leaving his.

"I'm a bad guy." He said, unable to resist enjoying how you visibly tensed at the words. He couldn't help it, he loved when you were scared. He licked his lips. "I'd be your worst nightmare if I was allowed."

"What does that mean?" You asked cautiously.

"I told you before; I'm not what you think I am." Yoongi replied, leaning his forearms on the table, edging closer to you. "Human." He whispered deviously. Your face contorted in confusion, mouth falling open in shock.

"Human?" You whispered. "What are you?"

"Let's just say...I'm a prisoner." He offered.

"I don't understand." You frowned.

"You're not supposed to." Yoongi couldn't help but crack a smile at your expression. Oddly, he enjoyed teasing you. "I guess you'll be needing a ride home?" He asked, switching the subject. Yoongi had recently been able to acquire a car, having learned to drive a long time ago.

"Oh...." Your voice faded away at the realisation. "Yeah. Yeah I will."

"Follow me." He instructed, slipping out of his chair and making his way to the door. You reluctantly trailed behind.

***

Months passed again and still no sign of Yoongi.

It wasn't like you missed him exactly. It was more a winding curiosity about him. After the day he joined you for coffee and dropped you home you felt like you had even more questions than before.

A thought occurred to you, maybe there was a way you could summon him. He appeared whenever you were in danger, so logically...if you were in danger again, that would cause him to show his face, right? Why didn't you realize this earlier? You could have seen him months ago. The only question now was, how exactly do you put yourself in harms way without dying or getting seriously injured.

Acting on impulse you grabbed your jacket and keys and made your way outside. You had an idea. A risky one, nonetheless, but an idea.

You made your way downtown, to an area you knew was dodgy, especially at this time of night. It was notorious for prostitution and gang violence, often appearing in the news when there were gun related deaths. A place you'd never go before, but now you had a guardian angel. You had a sense of confidence you didn't have before.

As you walked you heard catcalls and whistles from the men sat drinking on the side of the street. You ignored them as you strode by, unsure of what the next part of your plan should be. However you didn't have to think for too long because someone was approaching you.

"Hey baby, how much?" A man was leering over you, a sneer on his lips. He had a silver tooth and a menacing looking face tattoo, like a stereotypical bad guy.

"I-I-I'm not a - " You stammered, backing away from him. He noticed and grabbed your forearm, snatching you close to him.

"I know a whore when I see one." He breathed, his disgusting breath tickling your face. You screwed your face up at the sensation, trying to yank your arm back. His grip only tightened.

"You've got the wrong idea!" You shouted, struggling in his grasp. "I'm not."

"So does that mean you're free then?" He smirked. Before you knew it he was pulling you down an alley, his strength overwhelming you. You stumbled along behind him, fighting him the entire way. He seemed to enjoy your suffering.

He stopped under a light on the side of a building, harshly pushing you up against the brick wall, caging you in with the weight of his body. You heard him grunt as he gripped your hips tightly, pressing his hard length against you.

"Stop, please!" You whined, beating your fists against his chest. He had the audacity to laugh in your face.

He ripped open your blouse, buttons flying off and landed somewhere in the distance. The fear started bubbling in your chest and you began to scream. "Shut the fuck up." He hissed, a hand flying to your mouth, pressing his palm against your lips to muffle the sound. With his free hand he fumbled with his zipper on his jeans. You panicked and started to thrash against him but this only made him wedge his knee against you to hold you still.

Your jeans were next to go, shoved down to your knees along with your underwear. You started to panic, eyes wildly searching for any sign of Yoongi. Surely he would know you were in danger and come swooping in any moment now? The alley was deserted aside from you and the creep and some trash cans.

This was really happening. You were an idiot.

The man's hot breath was against your neck as he kneed your legs apart. You felt yourself start to sob, fighting to keep your legs closed. Before he could do the thinkable he was torn away from you, leaving you to collapse in a heap on the ground. Your theory had been right. Yoongi was here.

You watched as Yoongi threw the man on the ground as if he was a rag doll, giving him a harsh kick to the side as a good measure. The man groaned and rolled over but Yoongi wasn't done yet. He stood over him and picked him up by the throat, high enough that his feet dangled off of the ground. The man was choking and spluttering, grasping at the arm Yoongi was using to strangle him.

Yoongi's eyes were dark and thunderous, narrowed in to slits. His strength was terrifying. The man's eyes started to bulge as blood started to pour from his mouth. He was thrown to the ground and Yoongi was left standing there, pieces of the man's throat still clutched in his fist and you realised what had happened. He'd torn the man's throat out with his bare hand. Your mouth hung open in shock.

It was as if he finally remembered you were there, dark eyes turning towards you. He stalked over to you and for a moment you felt pure, unadulterated fear, wondering what was going to happen next. Instead, he offered a hand to you and you scrambled to your feet. His eyes shifted uncomfortably, desperately trying to avoid looking at your naked lower half and you hastily pulled your jeans and underwear back up. However, your top was still broken and you shivered exposed in the cold night air.

"Here." Yoongi was offering you his leather jacket and as he looked at your bare chest you blushed. You slipped it on, zipping it up. "What the fuck are you even doing here?!" He hissed. You finally met his eyes and you could see his jaw was clenched, a vein popping in his neck.

"I was walking." You said quietly.

"In this area? Are you fucking stupid?!"

"I-I didn't realise."

"You are a fucking nightmare." Yoongi gripped you by the elbow and began to drag you out of the alley. You followed almost dutifully behind, scared to speak incase he got angrier.

You didn't get any catcalls this time as you walked with his protective arm over you. He said nothing as you walked and you knew by the route he was taking that you were headed back home.

"I'm sorry!" You eventually squeaked. He gave you a dark look.

"Do you do this crazy shit on purpose?" He muttered. You remained silent.

It wasn't long before he was leading your shaking body into your apartment, closing the door behind you. You realised this was the first time he'd ever been inside your home. You stood awkwardly a few feet apart from each other. His head was low, avoiding looking at you. "Thanks for saving me. Again."

"It's not my choice." He uttered lowly. He looked tense, almost as if he was in pain.

"Still. I appreciate it."

"I've never seen a human who gets themselves into so many dangerous situations. Have you ever thought you might be cursed?" He sneered, running a distressed hand through his hair. He began pacing your living room, almost as if he was frantic.

"Um...are you ok?" You asked tentatively.

He didn't stop pacing. "It's you." He said gesturing to you, still not meeting your eyes. "I can't deal with this."

"No one's forcing you to help me!" You replied. He let out a mocking laugh.

"That's exactly it y/n. Someone is forcing me to help you. I don't have a choice." He stopped pacing to look at you. "You are my punishment, because being around you was the worst thing the council could think of."

"What?" You stammered, bewildered.

"See these?" He rolled up his sleeves, showing you his wrists where there were intricate black, almost lacy tattoos. "And this?" He yanked down the collar of his t-shirt and you saw a similar pattern around his neck. "These are spells. They are shackles, tying me to you. I couldn't escape you even if I tried."

"Spells? What are you talking about? This is a weird joke, Yoongi."

"Do you know what I am, y/n?" He said huskily, licking his lips. You were frightened again. He took a step towards you and you took one back. "I'm a demon."

"No you're not." You utter weakly, not entirely convinced of the words yourself.

"But I am." He took another step forward. "How do you explain half of the stuff you've seen me do then? Hmm?"

"I-I don't know."

He stood an arms length away from you now. "It's torture for me being around you."

"Why?" You whispered, feeling a little guilty and a little let down.

"Because the smell of your blood drives me fucking crazy."

He was mere inches from your face now and you noticed his eyes were a different colour than they were before. Instead of the black orbs you had become familiar with his eyes were a fiery hazel shade, blazing with something you didn't quite recognise. Whatever it was, it made the hairs on the back of your neck stand up.

"So you are a vampire now?" You shot back, feigning all the confidence you didn't have in that moment. He chuckled lowly, shaking his head.

"I told you what I am. Demon's have bloodlust too." He gripped the jacket you were wearing - his jacket - and pulled you towards him. "Your scent is going to be all over this now." He murmured.

"Is that a bad thing?" Your voice came out whisper like. It was overwhelming to be this close to him. A demon. Someone you've watched kill twice now. Someone who could kill you in a heartbeat.

"No. It's not."

His head dipped low into the crook of your neck, nose running over the skin. You should have pushed him away but something in you was almost enjoying it. After a few moments his lips brushed your neck and instantly you felt your skin heat up at his touch. He planted a soft kiss  before you felt his tongue lap at your flesh. It was dizzyingly pleasurable. He must have been enjoying it as well because he groaned.

His teeth began to scrape at your skin and you panicked. He was going to bite you. "Yoongi," You said fearfully, trying to push him away. "Stop."

It was almost as if you had burned him because he leapt away from you. His eyes were spaced, almost as if he was drunk, lips plump and swollen. "Sorry. I didn't mean to. I got carried away."

"Is it because of my...my blood?" You asked curiously. He nodded.

"I should go. Are you going to be able to stay out of trouble or do I need to stay and babysit you human?" He asked.

"Stay." The words left your lips before you could think about it. He quirked an eyebrow at you, as if questioning your sincerity. "I feel...safe when you're around."

"You shouldn't."

***

Yoongi lay on your sofa for that night, staring at the ceiling, still trying to process the fact that he was there. He'd agreed to stay for one night, neglecting to tell you the fact that being around you almost made him feel drunk on your scent. It only got worse the longer her spent around you. It was bordering on torturous now.

The sound of your footsteps interrupted his internal turmoil. You padded barefoot on the carpet to the kitchen, passing him as you went. He decided to get up and follow you. He nearly groaned out loud when he saw you were in nothing but an oversized tshirt. "Y/N." He spoke lowly. You gasped and dropped the glass you had been drinking water from. It smashed on the floor.

"Yoongi! You startled me."

He crossed the room using his entire body to push you up against the counter. You stumbled backward and he caged you in with his arms against the granite. "You can't wear stuff life this around me." He growled. His eyes swept your flimsy t-shirt. It was clear you didn't have a bra on. Yoongi wondered if you even had panties on.

"It's just a t-shirt." You said almost breathlessly.

"You don't understand how being around you affects me." He clutched at material of your shirt, balling it in his fist. He could barely contain himself when he heard your breath hitch.

"Yoongi." You whispered. His head dipped down to your neck, nose running over the flesh. You smelled even better than earlier. "What are you doing?"

He didn't answer you, instead choosing to lick a long, hot stripe up your neck and to your jaw, giving him a small taste of you. He felt your skin ripple with goosebumps. You were frozen as he kissed your jaw, then your cheeks and then finally capturing your lips with his. To his surprise you let him, kissing him back, even moaning when his tongue slipped into your mouth.

Yoongi's brain was foggy as his tongue slid against yours, wet and dirty.  He pressed himself into you harder, a hand running up your shirt to grip your bare hip, keeping you in place against him. You gasped and pulled away when you felt his erection. It only made him move back to your neck where he started to suck on your skin. It was the only thing holding him back from biting you.

"I want you so bad, it's hurting me y/n." He said, slipping his other hand up your shirt and grinding his hips against you. "You feel that? You feel how hard I am. That's you."

"Can you even have sex?" You blurted, breath short from want.

He smirked. "Yep. And so much more."

He moved, lifting you up and placing you on the counter as you wrapped your legs around his waist. Lips returned to yours as his hands wandered over your breasts, twisting and rolling your nipples in his hands. As if on autopilot he lifted your shirt up and off your body so he could look at you, tossing it to the floor with little regard.

"Are you going to fuck me?" You asked, looking at him coyly.

"I'm going to ruin you." He replied devilishly.

Hands fisted your underwear, tearing them clean off your body as if to drive his point home. The elastic snapped against your skin. Yoongi stroked the outside of your bare pussy, keening when you shivered.

"Please touch me."

His finger slipped into your folds and he moaned out loud feeling how wet you were already. You wanted him too and it made his ego swell. "You've wanted this for a while haven't you? Wanted me to touch you like this?"

"N-no." You stammered.

"Lying is what bad girls do." He stopped stroking you and you whined. "I won't touch you again until you tell the truth."

"Yoongi, please."

His lips returned to your neck as his fingers danced over your thighs, teasing you. "That's why you were naughty tonight right? You wanted to see me. You've been thinking about me a lot huh?"

"Ok fine." You groaned. "I wanted to see you. I wanted you."

"Good girl."

He resumed touching you and enjoyed how you squirmed beneath him but the hardness between his legs was beginning to ache. He unzipped his jeans freeing his cock and pressed the tip of it at your entrance, gripping the back of your thighs. He was still fully clothed and you had a death grip on his t-shirt.

"Wait," You panted, pushing his chest. "Condom."

"I'm not human." He laughed. "You can't get pregnant."

Unable to wait any longer he pushed inside of you swiftly. You wailed at the stretch. He knew he was big and he knew he should have gone a bit slower but he was loosing any and all inhibitions. He started to fuck in to you, rough and controlling. You squeezed your eyes shut as you clung to him.

"Y/N." He whispered, tongue languidly lapping at your neck once more. He couldn't stay away. "I'm going to bite you."

You protested, shaking your head desperately but Yoongi was gone, past the point of no return. His teeth sank into your flesh and you cried out. He knew it would only hurt for second before the endorphins took over. A long, hot, red line dripped down your chest between your breasts. He moaned against your skin as he sucked the blood into his mouth. You tasted even better than he imagined.

Your pussy squeezed around him as you came, it made him light headed. Yoongi had to physically tear himself away from your neck before he did any real damage. He was scared he wouldn't be able to stop if he didn't.

Yoongi came a few thrusts later inside of you.

He pulled away to look at you as he came down from his high, feeling completely and utterly blissed out. You gave him a dreamy look. "Are you ok?" He said, voice low and breath ragged. You nodded. He gently put you down, a stark contrast to how he was fucking you before, his lust fuelled frenzy over.

"I'm going to be sore tomorrow." You said as you hobbled over to your discarded shirt and slipped it on. He readjusted his clothes and made himself decent as well. "Are you still going to stay?"

Yoongi scoffed. "I said I would didn't I?!"

"I'm going to go clean up." You looked at him as if you wanted to say something else but didn't. You left the kitchen and the regret of what he had done immediately began to sink in. He'd had sex with a human.

↪ chapter 02 

masterlist

[leafs-lover]

Because Two People Got Drunk: 22

Series Masterlist

Chapter 22

A/N: So I haven’t been to Greece, always wanted to. I originally planned on the entire trip being 1 chapter so it was going to be vague, but decided to break it up into a few which meant I needed some more details on locations/sights. I’m sorry if you have been there and I got some info I got wrong, I relied on google for most of it.

Summary: You and Fred begin your short vacation without Oliver. You enjoy the first couple days sightseeing and exploring the island together.

Warnings: Swearing, smut

Word Count: 4900

“Where are we going?” you question as you sit on the plane. You are about two hours into the flight, and Fred booked a small private plane to take you. The flight crew didn’t mention where you are going before takeoff and it’s driving you crazy. 

“Just going to have to wait and see” Fred says smiling and not looking up from his book. You spent the last few days in Denmark trying to get him to tell you, and this was always his response. You tried to get his mom or sister to crack while at the spa but neither would tell you. You even tried to bribe Oliver, but he responded with “I don’t know” and you believe him; only because Fred knows that your 1 ½ year old son can ‘t keep secrets.

You huff in disapproval and hear the man beside you chuckle. He places a kiss in your hair “we’re almost there babe and then you will find out. Just have to be patient.”

“Ugh you’re the worst” you joke.

The rest of your time in Denmark went really well, you spent it with his family showing the city to Oliver. You really felt like all the issues were in the past and you belonged; were a part of the family.

“Fred, did you…are we in Santorini?” you question as you step off the plane. You smell the fresh air warm salt water, looking around and see the colourful cliffside villages.

“Mhm” he hums in your ear as you take in the breathtaking views.

“Babe this is insane, it’s too much.”

“For you? My amazing girlfriend, mother of my child? I don’t think it’s enough” he says kissing your cheek.

You turn and jump into his arms “you’re too good to me” you say smiling. Fred leans in and kisses you lightly “I really am aren’t I?” he jokes earning a light laugh from you.

After a short car ride you arrive at your hotel, which is tucked in the side of a cliff. You open the door to your room and see that you are staying in a room that is actually a cave carved into a cliff. You have a massive bedroom, with doors that open up to your own private balcony. The décor in the rooms is simple, with a lot of white and some accent colours on the pillows. But you realize the space is amazing on its own and doesn’t need anything more, it speaks for itself.

You move to explore the room, but Fred grabs your hand and pulls you onto the veranda, which has its own infinity pool and overlooks the Aegean Sea. Crisp blue waters are all you can see. Fred wraps his arms around you as you lean back into his chest, “tonight we are having dinner out here while we watch the sunset” he whispers, sending chills down your spine. You tilt your head to look up at him as he places a kiss on your lips “can’t wait” you whisper.

Later that night you have showered off the plane ride, and put on your white spaghetti strap midi dress. It has a floral lace overlay that extends to your knees. You pair it with the shoes Fred bought you for your birthday.

You walk onto the balcony and see Fred in a pair of beige shorts with a navy collared t-shirt tucked in. He is setting the dinner on the table when he hears your heels on the floor causing him to look up at you.

A smile spreads across his face and he stops setting the table. “How did I get so lucky?” he says kissing your lips lightly.

“I ask myself that every day” you respond leaning in to him.

“Please, we both know you are out of my league” he laughs.

“That’s a lie babe. I’m nothing without you” you say. You move to the table and he pushes your chair in behind you, taking a seat at the chair beside you. You eat dinner looking out over the water, listening to the sound of waves crashing on the shore. You have an easy conversation, laughing and enjoying your time.

“I never asked why were you single the night we met?” he asks.

You laugh as you start eating your chicken. “What a girl like you, I just can’t believe that you were single when we met. What poor idiot messed things up with you?”

“Uhh, that would be me” you say taking a drink of wine. Fred continues to eat but has his eyes locked on you waiting for you to continue. “I had a boyfriend in high school, and another in college. Stephen, my college boyfriend and I broke up during 3rd year; I was single for a little bit. Dated a couple people, but nobody serious for a few years. Then when I was 26 I met Cody. We dated for almost 4 years; I was in love with him, thought I would marry him and have a family. Then he got offered a job in Vancouver, I knew he had applied to it so I wasn’t overly surprised. We had talked a little bit about what we would do if he did get it, about me going with him. My company has offices out there so I could have looked into a transfer, so it’s not like I wouldn’t be working. But when it became real, when it was no longer a hypothetical and I had to act on it, I couldn’t.”

“What was the problem? If you wanted to marry him why go?”

“It just didn’t feel right. I had this feeling that I shouldn’t go and I didn’t know why” you explain taking a sip of wine. “I guess it took that for me to realize I didn’t actually love him, or not in the way I thought. Because if I did love him, like 100% wholeheartedly in love… I wouldn’t have hesitated; I just wish it didn’t take me 4 years to realize I didn’t love him.

But it’s weird, because I had 4 years with him, but after like 6 months with you I made the choice to move to Pittsburgh. And that was six months that revolved mostly around sex, we weren’t even dating then. But going there felt right, not just for Ollie, but it felt like the right decision for me.”

A smile crosses his face “like you knew I was going to have an impact on your life outside of Oliver.”

“Yeah” you agree smiling. “What about you? You have girls messaging you all the time, why didn’t any of them ever lock you down?”

He laughs a little at your comment “I don’t know. I mean I’ve dated a bit in Toronto but nothing serious. I guess no girl ever had what I was looking for. I would sometimes meet up with the girls who messaged me, but they were only messaging me because of who I am. It never really turned into anything serious between us. And then I met you, and I honestly wanted to date you after our first night together.” “I’m sure you did” you say laughing.

His large hand slides across the table touching your wrist lightly “I did babe, I was upset I was rushed and couldn’t get your number. Whenever I was at Hoops those weeks after I would hope to see you; that you would walk through those doors again. It was easy to talk to you, and you didn’t know who I was which was nice too. But that night I was feeling like shit, and you made me feel better.”

“Blowjobs and sex tend to do that” you say smirking at him.

Fred laughs at that comment “Well obviously that helped. But I was going to say the conversation at the bar made feel better. Sitting there with you for those few hours that cheered me up and made my night better. If we had of went our own ways after the bar, I would have left feeling 100% better than I was when I walked in. I guess I just knew from the beginning there was something about you.”

“I think I knew there was something about you but I was too scared to admit it” you start, pausing briefly when Fred laughs “yeah I’d say.”

“After Cody I took some time, and tried to evaluate myself. I guess I just couldn’t understand why I had this man in front of me that I couldn’t love. Like he was an amazing person, every quality I thought I wanted, the kind of person anyone would be happy with. I thought something was wrong with me for it, who takes that long to realize they don’t love someone. Then with you I guess I was scared it would happen again, but this time I had to think about Oliver not just myself. I didn’t want it to happen again. To be with you and we start something together and when the time comes for me to commit I can’t do it. And then it ruins us, but not just our romantic relationship but also our parenting relationship. I… I panicked.”

“So how do you know that you’re ready now?” he asks. “Ready for me, for us?”

“Because I can’t imagine life without you, I can’t imagine not waking up to those brown eyes. The thought of not having you in my life makes me sick, not hearing your voice. I can’t imagine a life where I walk into the living room and see you and Ollie playing, or snuggled on the couch.

You are the second greatest thing to happen to me, the first being Oliver. I’ve never felt this before; I’ve never had anything that compares to this. I think a year ago, everything felt like too much all at once, I was a little overwhelmed. I don’t think I was ready to head down that road at that point in my life.

I just needed time to get there, to get out of my head. I think if we had of tried a year earlier we would still be together now and everything would be amazing, but I was overthinking everything. But I’m here now and I’m not going anywhere.”

“Well I’m happy you figured it out, and for the record I’m not going anywhere either” he says placing a soft kiss on your cheek. He grabs your hand and pulls you over to the outdoor couch. You sit comfortably on his lap as the sun is falling towards the horizon. The once blue skies now have now turned to warm red, yellow and orange hues. You listen to the waves crashing into the shore, the waves hitting each other as a light breeze lightly moves the branches of the palm trees. Fred’s lightly strokes your side, sometimes he will place a soft kiss on your cheek or jaw as you both sit in silence.

You are the first to speak “this is amazing” you turn to look at him. “And I don’t just mean the sunset” you lightly press your lips to his. You stay outside a little while longer, wrapped in his arms until the sun fully sets the stars and the moon illuminating the world around you.

“You know seeing you in this white dress” he says shifting under you, making you feel his erection poking through his shorts “makes me think of what you will look like in a wedding dress.”

You turn and look at Fred raising your eyebrow “I’m not proposing skat. It’s just before you I never really thought about it, I was never really in a relationship where I saw it heading to marriage and kids. I almost didn’t see it happening for myself, now I find myself thinking about it randomly. I’ll be lying in bed trying to sleep, or on the plane heading to a road game, and I just start thinking of the future. What two years, 5 years, 10 years with you will look like with you.”

“One day I will be Mrs. Frederik Andersen” you whisper against his lips. “But tell me what does our future look like? What do you see for us?” Your fingers begin to lightly run through his hair as you sit and listen.

“Well I see us being married. A little girl running around playing with Oliver, and she’ll be just like you. Not just appearance but her personality, laugh, her heart; all you. She will definitely have your sass and attitude, which will be mayhem as she grows up. A puppy for you because all you talk about is a puppy.” You laugh at that comment, but he is right; you talk about it so much Oliver has even started to ask for a puppy. He starts to pepper your jaw and neck with kisses as he continues talking, “I see us in a house, the five of us on Christmas morning. You making us wear matching pyjamas, even the dog. Me pretending to hate it but secretly loving every moment of it. Playing with the kiddos in the snow, making snow angels and snowmen.”

You smile and kiss him again “does Denmark get much snow?” you ask him.

“Babe we can’t really visit during the season –“

“I know, I meant after your done hockey. When you retire we could live there. I mean if you wanted to live there.” “You would move to Denmark?” he asks you pushing some hair behind your ear. You nod in response before he continues “I never thought about the where we would live, means a lot that you would consider moving to Denmark though.”

“I mean it is your home” you say lightly.

“And Toronto is yours” he responds kissing you.

“As long as I have you I could be happy anywhere. Maybe we figure out the where later on” you say as Fred’s hands lightly stroke up the back on your arms. “What else do you see in our future?”

“I see you with grey hair” that statement causes you to wrinkle your nose slightly at the thought.

“Don’t want the grey hair?” he asks and you shake your head.

“Personally I can’t wait to be old and grey with you. Sitting on a porch swing while the grandkids run around or swim in the pool. Family barbeques and trips. I can see you going by Nana, teaching them your family cookie recipes, sleepovers and…”

“Okay, having grey hair doesn’t sound terrible now” you mumble before kissing him. You run your hands through his hair, grinding your hips against his erection. Fred groans into the kiss before his hands slide to the back of your thighs hoisting you up. You giggle and wrap your legs around his waist; he carries you to the bed where you spend a few hours tangled in each others arms before finally dozing off.

The next morning you wake up at 8:30 with Fred spooning you, he is placing soft kisses on your shoulder. You moan and shift back slightly to be pressed up against his hard chest, “morning” you mumble.

“Breakfast will be here at 10, and we have to leave at 11” he says lightly before kissing your neck one last time.

“You planned everything out didn’t you” you question pressing your ass against him. He runs his fingers up your arm kissing your neck “well I didn’t plan on any morning fun or else I would have woken you up sooner.”

You turn your head to look at him “well add it to the schedule for tomorrow.” Fred brushes some hair from your face, he engages you in a soft but passionate kiss. When he finally pulls away he has a large grin on your face “definitely sweetheart” he says to you. He pulls the blanket off of you “go get ready skat.”

Later that day you are wearing you’re favourite sundress, with your bathing suit underneath. Fred has booked a private boat tour around Santorini, and to some of the smaller nearby islands. After about 90 minutes the boat docks and you disembark at Palea Kameni, two small islands formed from volcanic eruptions. There are many large ships that resemble pirate ships in the harbour.

“The island has been building up slowly throughout time. Every eruption has deposited additional pumice to the island expanding its footprint. You have about 45 minutes to explore the area, there is even a hot spring up there” your guide says pointing to a path.

Fred quickly grabs your hand and you start the short hike. You notice that most of the landscape is barren likely due to the acidic soils caused from the volcanic eruptions, but there are some succulents sparsely across the ground. You stop at the top of a hill and take in the view, you are overlooking the bay, and to the east you can see Santorini in the distance.

No matter where you look you see sparkling blue water, Fred quickly pulls his phone out and snaps a few pictures of you two with the harbour as the backdrop while he kisses your cheek. He pulls back and puts his phone away; you lean in and kiss him, wrapping your hand arm around his neck.

Your fingers snake into his hair, his hands on your lower back as your tongues fight for dominance in each other mouths. Fred groans into the kiss, one of his hands slides further to your ass giving it a soft squeeze.

“Freddie” you squeal jumping slightly. He kisses your jaw laughing wrapping his arms around you, holding you against his chest.

“What? Nobody is here” he mumbles kissing the top of your head. After a minute he eases his grip and takes your hand and continues on the trail leading you to the hot spring. You both strip to your bathing suits, and Fred beats you to the water sitting down first.

As soon as you step into the warm water Fred shifts to give you some space beside him. Instead you walk in front of him and place your hands on his shoulder. Fred looks up at you, and you sink down onto his lap, straddling him.

You grin at him, bringing your hands up to his hair. Fred’s hands slide up your body and stop on your waist, he runs his hands up and down your back while smiling at you. You lean in gripping his hair tight and lock him in a deep kiss, your tongues fight for dominance in each other’s mouths as his as his fingers toy with the strings of your bathing suit bottoms.

You rock your hips against him, feeling him start to harden beneath you. His hand undoes one of the bows you have tied on your bottoms. His mouth moves to your neck, peppering kisses on your sweet spot. You continue to grind your hips against his erection, hand sliding down to palm him over his bathing suit when you hear some laughing from behind you. You quickly jump off him and sit beside Fred when you see a family making their way up the steps towards the springs. You casually re-tie your bathing suit bottom, the family walks by you finding a spot a few metres away.

“We should get back to the boat” Fred says to you a few minutes later. You nod and get out of the spring and dry off. You pull your dress back on and start the short trip back to the boat.

You continue on your journey and after another boat ride arrive in Thirassia, which is on the west side of the volcano. It is another island off the coast of Santorini. While the crew prepares your lunch you and Fred snorkel in the clear water.

The staff alerts you that lunch will be ready in 15 minutes, so you both return to the boat; you make your way to the private room to change and Fred follows you. Since you are done swimming for this trip you remove your wet bathing suit and wrap a towel around yourself. After you have dried yourself off you drop the towel and bend into your bag pulling out some dry underwear.

You stand up straight and can hear Fred take a deep breath and mumble some swear words behind you. Not even a second later you feel his hands wrap around you. He cups your breast and begins to massage your nipple. He bends down and nips you on your shoulder, his other hand runs up and down your stomach. Your head falls back onto his chest “babe they’ll hear” you moan.

Fred pulls you closer into him and you can feel his erection pressed into your back “you knew what you were doing when you dropped your towel” his other hand slides down and presses circles on your clit. “You knew what you were doing when you climbed in my lap in the hot springs” he says sucking on your neck.

You push your hips back, and grind against him causing him to groan loudly. “You are a very smart woman. You have known what you have been doing to me all day and you kept doing it.” His finger is lightly playing with your folds, waiting for your permission to slide in you.

His mouth attaches to your neck and sucks hard, he isn’t wrong. You two have always had a healthy sex life since you got together, but this trip is different. You don’t know if it’s because Oliver isn’t around, or the romantic feeling Santorini exudes but since you have gotten here you haven’t wanted to leave the bed. It doesn’t help that your boyfriend spends most of his time in the sun without a shirt.

You could wait until you got back to the hotel, but you don’t think you want to. His finger continues to dance around your entrance as you bite your lower lip as you grind your ass further back against him. The only thing holding you back is the fear of being heard by the boat staff. You think you are going to make him wait until later; which you know would lead to some wild sex complete with multiple orgasms and bruises on your hips. But in that moment he rolls your nipple in his fingers and bites your neck, his other finger presses hard into your clit.

“Fuck” you mumble, feeling him smile against your neck. He knows what he is doing is working, and he pushes his hips forward his erection pressed between your ass cheeks.

“What are you going to do about it” you groan unable to wait any longer. Fred quickly pushes you to the bed, you fall forward and climb up on your hands and knees sticking your ass out for him.

“Frederik” you sternly whisper as he slaps your ass. He quickly pushes two fingers inside your folds.

“You know what happens when you call me that” he growls pumping his fingers inside you. You moan loudly, when you feel his hand come around your mouth.

“You have to be quiet skat or they will hear” he says his fingers still pumping inside you.

“You have to be quick so they don’t come looking for us” you retorts. Fred pulls his fingers from you; he grabs you by the neck and pulls you up so your back is against his chest. He brings his fingers to your mouth “lick” he orders.

You open your mouth as he slides his fingers inside your mouth, while simultaneously sliding his hard cock inside your folds. You close your mouth on his fingers, groaning as you clean your flavour from him and your walls are stretched out by him.

He rocks into you slowly at first, using the rocking of the boat to guide his movements. Once he is satisfied with his fingers he pulls them out of your mouth and pushes you forward onto your hands. His hands tightly grip your hips as he pulls you back onto him.

He thrusts firmly inside you; your ass hits his pelvis as he bottoms out each time. You bite your lip trying to stifle your moan, a whimper escaping your lips. You hear Fred chuckle because he knows how hard this is for you. He continues thrusting before he increases the pace. The room is filled with the sound of your skin flapping when you can’t hold it in anymore, your mouth opens and a loud strangled groan leaves you.

“Smuk” he growls, he brings a hand to the front of your neck and pulls you back up against him. He keeps his pace, while his hand tightens its grip around your throat, restricting your airway. This causes you to stop moaning as Fred continues pumping inside you.

You are getting close, and can feel your high approaching and your walls begin to clench. “Not yet, wait for me” he whispers, you let out a loud groan in disapproval.

He quickly tightens his grip against your throat and pumps inside you; he brings a knee up onto the bed. This allows him to change the angle and push deep, pounding against your cervix with every thrust. Your ass is being pulled back against his pelvis; you feel him becoming erratic behind you. Fred releases your throat and you take in a deep breath, one you didn’t notice you needed.

His hand goes to your other hip, using it to pull you back hard into him as he chases his high. You fall forward, tightly gripping the bedsheets. Your orgasm is right there, but you want to hold out for Fred. You feel him increase the pace, your mouth falls open and a loud strangled groan leaves your mouth.

You don’t care if the crew hears you anymore; you are unable to contain yourself. The sounds leaving your mouth are filthier than a porno, but you are more focused on waiting for Fred than anything else. Fred slaps your ass which has you coming undone, you clench around him.

Your walls tighten and you hear him quietly mutter some Danish curse words before he twitches and pushes deep inside you. You fall onto the bed and Fred collapses on top of you.

“You weren’t quiet” he jokes kissing your shoulder.

“You weren’t quick” you reply laughing.

After a few minutes Fred pulls out, you both clean up and get changed before returning to the deck for lunch. You and Fred walk out hand in hand, when you walk by two of the workers shoot you a glance and have a hushed conversation. Your face immediately goes beet red, Fred squeezes your hand “it’s fine dear” he whispers as you arrive at the table for lunch.

A couple hours later you are back in the hotel and have showered. You are still embarrassed about what happened on the boat, and are tired from the hiking and your afternoon activities. Not having the energy to get ready for dinner you change into a pair of grey track shorts, you pull on a loose off-shoulder lounging shirt not even bothering with a bra or underwear. You pull your hair up in a messy bun, and apply some moisturizer to your otherwise naked face.

You see Fred sitting in a pair of shorts on the patio and make your way over to him. He hears your footsteps and looks at you, smiling as he takes you in. “I didn’t feel like getting all dressed up tonight” you explain sitting beside him.

Fred places a hand on your thigh and kisses your cheek “I don’t care what you wear, or what you look like. Could dress like this every day from now on and I wouldn’t care.”

You roll your eyes at him, but before you can respond he gently tilts your chin to look at you. He places a soft kiss on your forehead “babe I mean it. I think you are the most incredible woman out there, and I’m not with you because of how you look with your makeup on and a tight little dress. I mean I’m not complaining about the tight dresses that drive me wild, but you are so much more than your clothes. I’ve never met a more compassionate, thoughtful and selfless person in my life. Looks can fade, but that, the things that make you the person you are, that won’t change.”

Before he can continue you kiss him, you lean back on the couch and Fred follows, his hand sliding up your shirt. His hand reaches your bare breast when a knock is on the door indicating dinner has arrived. You hear him groan, and you aren’t sure if it’s because he was interrupted or the lack of clothing under your shirt.

The hotel:

White Dress:

Next Chapter

[cloveroctobers]

ROBERT “BOBBY” MCKENZIE —

IG info/bio : @/returnofdamckenzie | 426k followers | @/mclitgs2 is my forever boo🤟🏽😍 while @/cardib is my WIFE! She just doesn’t know it yet ❤️ support my work & be part of my family: @/bobbymckcares

24 (25) years young

Born in Dundee, raised in Glasgow, Scotland

Jamaican father named Badrick who is a African studies professor

Caucasian/Scottish mother named Catriona who used to be a au pair but now works as a receptionist in senior living — one eye is honey hazel and the other a dark brown

It was difficult growing up in a school that didn’t accept Bobby being biracial, it resulted in bullying to the point where he needed to switch schools (A lawsuit was also in place) The next school was slightly better but Bobby slowly learned to accept himself as it was not something he could control and not something he would want to in the first place. He was proud of where he came from and never thought he was better or less than anyone else, that wasn’t how he was raised

He’s an only child, his parents thought about adopting (and fostering) but with Bobby they had their hands full and he was just enough for them

His family is very family-oriented so he would never have to feel lonely since they gave him a lot of attention, slightly making him spoiled but he was also around his cousins & spending time with them as well

He’s extremely close to his younger cousin (only by a few months) Femi who he views as his sister. They’ve been through a lot together and are always there for each other so it only makes sense

Most likely an active kid always up to some sort of shenanigans whether it’s by himself or with his group of friends, “why would you do that Bobby?” “Don’t ask why but ask, why not!?”

Definitely suffered some broken bones, concussions, & sprain injuries but would never show signs of pain...guys got a high pain tolerance that’s for sure

Fan of films/series “stand by me” & “the goonies” & “scooby doo” since he feels they relate to his life??

Hospital caterer and loves making those feel better with food that he’s created. If he can’t put a smile on patients face with words then he feels like he can show them with food

Food is an art to him. He went to school for culinary & it’s very important for him to show how much it is to him. He picked up the craft from of course his family, who always used food for numerous of things: to bring people together is one of them

Perfected Jerk haggis, it is now he favorite dish next to desert & breakfast!

I’m struggling to figure out what sign he maybe? He’s very playful which may come off as childish at times, which makes me think of Leo? (Maybe Gemini?) Only because they usually hold onto their childhood as best as they can, very generous, & give their energy to you but I also don’t see him being a fire sign at all? So maybe very little Leo in his chart. I also feel like he might be a bit of an empath? He knows when situations around him don’t feel right, knows how to read the room, and always wants to help others by lighting things up.

Idk but I’m feeling he’s libra sun + Gemini moon + Leo rising? Who knows

Probably lived in a 2 bed flat with his old uni mate. It was small and a bit shit but it was their shit and they made the best of it

Now lives in a stone cottage or farmhouse with MC that was built in the 1900’s & is slightly haunted. He’s decided to call them Duncan??? But he believes they’re a good spirit, maybe even a friendly ghost!? since he got comfortable with the bizarre happenings in the new flat & it doesn’t seem like they want to hurt them

Lottie offered to bring her ouija board next time she visited—Bobby declined

House is mostly neutral based but three of the rooms in the flat are covered in ridiculous patterned walls or furniture much to MC’s distaste but, “what’s yours is mine” right? No. But Gary approves!

Has two dogs: a terrier & a collie since MC wasn’t down for getting a sheep

They do have chickens to raise their own eggs tho!

Definitely the kind of significant other that will ride on the cart when they’re out grocery shopping, will make you breakfast in bed, & will send you memes while he’s at home and you’re out or even when he’s at work and you’re at home, let’s you put his arm to sleep when you’re laying on it in bed (big ass head gang!), definitely chooses the candles from bath & body works that smell like food items (majority of them suck let’s be honest)

Probably smells like cucumber, melons, lemons, and eucalyptus

Has your wedding date in his IG bio & is proud

Annoys Gary & Lottie with his food pics, “oh, Not this shit again! 😡 looks brilliant, but enough!”

Has zoom/FaceTime movie nights with Marisol & MC who stopped feeling like she was third-wheeling months ago

Talks to hope & Noah (in the background) as much as he can. Feels like they’re his inspiration for love, even tho he’s the only one married out of the villa

He values marriage just like his parents do and often has Sunday dinners with them & MC ofc

Probably has relationship guide books and only reads them out of boredom but finds fascinating facts/advice if he pays attention & tries to apply it to his relationship with mc. If it works, it works! & If it doesn’t, you can’t say he didn’t try!

Works long hours but will still come home to cook for MC or brings leftovers from the events he’s catered (most are for the hospital but occasionally he’ll do other events)

Has a separate IG for his work

When WAP dropped, he almost lost his shit. Even tried to get MC to do the challenge with him, he’s pretty bad but MC eventually learned it just for him 😜

Is thrilled that Cardi made the best decision EVER on divorcing offset, “are you thinking of leaving me now?” “... I might.” “BOBBY!” “Haha, I love you!

Absolutely loves Christmas!!! It’s his favorite holiday and he loves giving back to everyone in his life. Usually he’s working overtime for the holidays & it makes him emotional due to the stories he hears & he puts a little extra love in his food

Goes all out for Christmas. Tries to buy/make everyone something. Even if he doesn’t really care for them...he’ll at least send them a x-mas card, if they keep it or burn it it’s entirely up to them—if he knew about it he’d probably be a little sad not gonna lie...he’s a soft king

Once bought Lottie black crocs with spooky pins , “are you joking Bobby?!” He knows she secretly loved them

Uses salt and peppermint in his dark hot cocoa...

Rather make deserts for Christmas than the food, he feels like it’s his duty

King of giving the thumbs up, especially when situations have gone to shit. He’ll still shoot them up with a smile or a grimace

Always inviting someone somewhere. “Bobby, hun. You’re 4-6 hrs away and it’s 1 am.” Hope groaned after listening to his bright idea, thinking something bad happened. “Ah, you could still make it if you tried, lassie.” “I’m gonna hang up now. Good night, bonkers man.”

Needs constant reminding when to get his locs touched up & moisturized

Either has a trampoline or a funhouse jumper in his backyard (maybe both) “we’ve got the space and this is better than a pool, or almost!”

Wants children, a whole footie team! There’s no specific time frame for him, when it happens, it happens

Used to cool & wet temps & loves vacationing in Greenland. Sure the hot weather he experienced in the villa was awesome & something different than what he’s used to but you can’t take the scot out of the man. So he typically sticks to places that are similar in temps, that way he doesn’t have to change his clothing choices much

Loves a good bath. Bubble baths are better than bath bombs to him, PERIOD!

Loves bubbles so much he put too much laundry detergent in the wash (does this on purpose now) and came back home to the dogs and room covered in it. Do you think he cleaned it up before MC came home? No. He decided to have a bubble party in the room with a Caribbean playlist playing in the background

MC definitely posted about it the first time & joined him for a bit, dreading the work that came with cleaning it all up. Now whenever Bobby needs a bubble party, he knows what to do. MC preferred him to have his little bubble party in the tub but 50% of the time he chooses not to listen & they leave him to pout & clean it himself

Likes to hold hands with fingers interlocked. When it’s cold and if you’re both wearing hoodies, he’ll slide his hand inside the arm of your hoodie to help keep you warm

Canon: His version of a snack is spaghetti hoops on toast & can eat that for the rest of his life & be content

If he didn’t end up marrying MC, probably finds his significant other working as a nurse at one of the hospitals he caters to or a volunteer at a old folks home

Never had a serious relationship, very few hookups, was either always placed in the friend zone or there was one person he wanted to be serious with but they rejected him and continued loving someone else who treated them like shit—so he kinda swore off of relationships and just flirted a bunch and kept his love life non-existent

Fav ice cream? Rocky road ice cream with one scoop of cotton candy & one scoop of cookie butter blue

Doesn’t believe in measuring when it comes to culinary. He uses his eyes as his measurement, could be a bad thing, could be a good thing, that’s up to you

If he’s up at night, he’s eating something sweet. A nice glass of single malt scotch whiskey + a splash of coconut milk (🤢) with a slice of angel food cake & he’s out like a light

Absolutely loves shopping for the kitchen, finds immense joy in doing so. If you lose him in a store, one of the places you’ll most likely find him is in the kitchen decor area

Owns a bagpipe & wants to get better at it, even tho he scared the living shit out of his dogs & chickens

Wears his shades quite a bit even tho the weather is hardly sunny and mainly windy & damp

Will hold the door for strangers even if they don’t say thank you

He’s open when it comes to music. Will listen to anything but feels like the music has to be a purpose for something...Everything he does in his day to day life has to feel like a soundtrack to him since in his mind he’s daydreaming about his life being made into a movie. Who isn’t?

He thinks wentworth Miller should play him in a film and that kid from blackish should play him when he was a wee lad, Marcus Scribner

Always keeps a positive attitude because he knows what it feels like to feel low and he doesn’t want anybody else in the world to feel like that so he wants to uplift and if he can try to be someone’s happiness he’ll gladly be that— which isn’t always the right move, he learned

Listens to: Rotimi, Shaggy, Sean Paul, Skip Marley, H.E.R., Jhene Aiko, Jorja Smith, UMI, The Kooks, The Killers, Cold War kids, Milky chance, Blood Orange, The 1975, Vampire Weekend, Bad Suns, BRYSON TILLER, Kilo Kish, & Ella Eyre (although he misses her old music)

Celeb crushes? Cardi B is his mfkin celeb wife okay?! Nobody else comes above her! He also thinks FKA twigs is pretty & super talented, sevdaliza!, Tia & Tamera, Iman, and brandy from the 90s makes him swoon

Anthem = jaden, “Boys and Girls”

[harryxmac]

✨💘🌙MOON&BACK🌙💘✨ Chapter Four

Fic Masterlist

Chapter 3

Masterlist

summary: in which luna loses her cool, then harry swoops in and they try.

Luna knew she was fucked. The moment her lips touched her boss’, she knew she was fucked. At the time she kinda liked the idea of being wanted and desired the way Harry had made her feel. 

But yet, here she was three days later with neither of them bringing up their kiss. Luna’s aim was to get on with her days, do her job and keep one little girl on the top of her priorities. 

But, with Harry coming home from work and focusing solely on Ruby, she couldn't help but feel a little left out and jealous. She tries to feel guilty and pushes it to the back of her head that she’s jealous of a five year old, but it doesn't go away.

She at least thought he would have the decency to either be like ‘hey, that was a mistake, lol, sike’ or either confess his love and live happily ever after. The latter seemed a little over dramatic and hopeful, but a girl can dream, and she definitely dreamt.

On the occasion, like today, that Harry was running late, she was to start dinner for them as part of their new dynamic that seemed to be working for them all.

Ruby was definitely liking the idea of having Luna around more. She seemed a lot happier, played a lot better and overall her happiness kind of shot up.

Luna and Harry found this kind of off seeing as they expected the opposite with the lack of Fenn around, yet here Ruby was bursting with personality and pure joy.

Luna thinks that spending time with Ruby is quite possibly her favourite thing to do at this given time. Beyond the endless episodes of Paw Patrol, spaghetti hoops and toys jotted randomly across Harry’s house, she truly does enjoy her time here.

For example, today Luna had come up with the great idea to have a cinema night (afternoon) with Ruby, renting a new kids movie that came out and loading up on popcorn, chocolate milk and twix’s. 

Ruby had taken it upon herself to grab her duvet from her bed and bring it down to the living room. When Luna laughed and said it was a fabulous idea, Ruby had trotted upstairs to grab Harry’s duvet for Luna to snuggle under.

When Luna saw the five year old draped in Harry’s king sized duvet, she gasped and led to a fight of giggles.

“Ru, that's your daddys!” She exclaimed, grasping it in her hold to take it back upstairs.

“No! What are you going to snuggle under?” Ruby asks, her tiny hands holding a strong grip on the duvet, so much that if Luna let go the poor give year old would topple over and she’d have to find her in a mess of duvet.

“But it's your Daddy’s, Ruby.”

“He won't mind! Daddys says you can’t watch a movie if you aren’t comfy!”

“M’not sure Ru” Luna hesitates.

All Luna can remember how good he smelt up close, that Tom Ford cologne engulfing her sense of smell. Consuming her so much that he was all she could smell for the rest of the evening. She reminisces on how when he kissed her neck she rested her head on his shoulder where her nose was up against his neck and all she could smell was him.

Luna wishes she could put to a point more of what he smelt like but she couldn’t. So for Ruby to be forcing her to snuggle on his bed sheets is almost blissful and she has to kick herself for wanting to squeeze them and bring them up to her nose. 

Especially with Harry acting the way he is, not bringing up their steamy kiss they shared, she feels like it's pushing a boundary that she doesn’t want to push, yet, even when the words leave her mouth, she doesn’t regret them.

“Okay”

Ruby squeals with excitement and scurries to sit down on the floor padded with sofa cushions.

“Can we have popcorn, please Lu?”

“Only a small bowl, okay?” Luna compromises and goes to the kitchen to prepare a bowl for Ruby.

-

Pulling up to his incredibly impressive home, holding a sleek and expensive reputation within the neighbourhood, all he wanted to do was just snuggle up with his little girl and kiss his kids babysitter.

Harry, being well aware of how he couldn’t get the thought of her lips off his mind, urged himself just to forget, paying no mind to the fact that without even trying or with intention, she stole his heart.

And he doesn’t mean that he wants to stick his dick inside of her, no. He wants to take her to dinner, see that adorable smile on her face, turn over to wrap his arms around her in the morning, make her feel like she can do anything, he wants to love her. 

Walking into his home, feet shuffling as he walked, he slipped off his shoes and chucked the keys of his 2020 BMW X5, a car he had bought for both looking good and safety for his little girl.

Harry sees his little girl gingerly moving and placing her teddies in the right positions in order to watch what he assumes is a film. She doesn’t notice him straight away, so he takes the opportunity to take off his jacket and make his way to the kitchen to make a cup of tea first.

“Salt or butter?” He hears Luna calls.

“It's me” He replies. 

Luan turns, too quick for it to be played off well. Meanwhile Harry takes a seat on the bar stool as he watches her navigate around the kitchen making popcorn.

“Oh, welcome home” She smiles.

“I’m just getting some popcorn for Ruby, she wants a movie afternoon” She adds.

“‘Oh, welcome home’?” He mocks.

“Don’t sound too happy I’m home” He laughs to soften his statement.

“Oh, I didn’t mean it like that, I was just looking forward to having a movie afternoon with her, and of course, I guess I should get going now you’re home” She smiles, popping down the popcorn bowl in front of him. 

She had already popped the kettle on too, knowing he would want a cup of tea.

Luna walked towards the closet in the hallways to grab her coat.

“Luna” He calls, getting up from the bar stool. He follows her to the closet, which is abnormally large for a closet in a hallway. 

“Why are you leaving?”

“Because you’re home”

“But, you don’t always leave when I’m home?”

Luna stutters among her words, urging to find some excuse to just leave.

Harry stares at Luna as she places on her coat.

“Luna”

“Harry”

“This is about the other night isn’t it?”

“What when you pushed me up against your door, kissed me, made me all flustered after telling me how your marriage hasn’t been right for years, then never brought it up again? Most bloody probably.” she raised her eyebrows and sighs, losing her cool.

And it’s within this moment that Harry cannot think about anything other than how much he wants to kiss her.

“Can I kiss you? Please?”

“Harry! Are you absurd? We need to talk about this, you’re crazy! I’m leaving” She turns, but Harry’s quick to just touch her arm and call her name.

“Please stay. We’ll cook Luna something then bath her and pop her to bed and we’ll order in and talk okay? I want to talk.” He assures.

Luna stands for a moment, dumbfounded that the man in front of her, in a way, is begging for her to stay and just talk. She weighs her options. 

And naturally, Luna did the thing she thinks anyone would do with a sexy, begging Harry Styles in front of her, she stays.

Ruby doesn’t question why Luna doesn’t leave before she goes to bed like she normally does. But, Ruby quite enjoys the presence of Luna when it's time for Harry to read her a bedtime story.

Luna can help but drool. He’s in sweats, a tight-fitted t-shirt showing all his muscles and more, but he’s talking so sweetly as he reads a Princess story. Being the best father he is, he reads in different voices, and creates all different manner of noises. She begs herself to not find him so hot, to not fall under his CEO, Dad soft persona he has going on.

All she wants to do is snuggle up with them more and fall asleep.

It's not straight away Harry and Luna discuss their situation. No. It’s after Harry orders way too much food from the local Dominos, and pours them both a glass of wine in the garden. The garden being full of warm fairy lights and cosy outdoor seating. 

The doors left partially open, just in case Ruby woke up to find Harry, which happened often enough to be cautious.

Luna bites on the greasy pizza, if he was going to let her down, at least she could get some pizza off him.

“Now can we talk about this?” Harry asks, sipping his wine as he glares at Luna who has tried everything within her to restrain looking at him.

She gently swallows and turns to him.

“Look, if it was a mistake that’s fine, we’ll forget about it, but don’t fire me, that's not fair for me or Ruby.” She states putting her glass down.

Harry’s dumbfounded, fire her?

“Luna,” He starts.

“Because, I get it, I’m young, I look after your little girl, it’s fine, just please don’t fire me” She pleads, part of her is embarrassed, but the other is infuriated with herself for being in this situation in the first place.

“Luna, I’m not firing you, muppet”

Luna’s eyebrows scrunch, he’s not?

“Well, then, thank you. But it's okay ‘about it being a mistake then, all is forgiven and we can be done.” She smiles.

Harry is instantly a little heartbroken. Mistake? This was no mistake.

“Luna, I don’t think this is a mistake, love” 

Luna's head tilts and she smiles a little.

“You don't?”

“Far from it,”

“But, I was under the impressio-”

“The wrong impression”

“I know it seems soon Luna, but things just feel so right, like I said, things hadn’t been right with Fenn and I, I know that now, I was kidding myself. What I feel right now, for you, is something I haven’t quite felt before, I’d quite like to explore that” He adds.

Luna cannot move, she tries, oh how she tries. But she’s just stone in her spot, he actually wants to try with her? Just Luna? 

“I -mean” 

Harry chuckles at her loss of words.

“What do you say?”

“Of course! I want to try with you too” She smiles, pressing a chaste kiss to his lips.

“We decide this and that's all I get?” He banters, patting the seat next to him, which Luna shuffles up to him giggling.

“I hope you don’t think it's that easy, Mr”

Harry smiles, slowly dragging his lips in to press a kiss on her lips. Sending a tingling feeling throughout her body. His lips encasing her bottom lip, he slowly pulls away only to remain against them once more, biting and suckling her lip, leaving her putty in garden furniture. 

Harry taps her hips in suggestion of moving onto his lap, which she gladly partakes in and sits quite comfortably in his lap. 

Luna pulls away, looking at Harry.

“We have to take this slow, it isn’t going to be easy, we’re really going to have to be careful.”

Harry looks down, sighing. Of course she’s right, he knows that.

“Daddy?” A small voice from the corner calls.

Luna quickly shuffles off his lap and sits next to him.

“Hey, darlin’” Ruby’s small feet shuffle through to the garden and in front of Luna and Harry.

“You're not at home” She states, looking at Luna.

“I’m not”

She hums.

“Shall we get you to bed?” Harry asks, trying to distract her.

Luna watches as Harry trots upstairs with Ruby in tow. She begins to grab her things and slowly get ready to leave. She leaves a few of her books on the kitchen counter, knowing she’d be here tomorrow so there was no point in taking them just to bring them back.

She decides Harry won’t care.

“Leaving me already?” Harry says as his feet shuffle down the steps of his carpeted stairs.

“Yeah, have an exam in the morning.”

“Close one, huh”

Luna tuts and smiles as she wonders over and presses her finger against his broad chest gently.

“That is why we need to be careful.” she laughed.

-

-taglist-

@kiwiisgolden   @vilintiniti   @harryspirate @kitykatnumber @Allmylove-hxx   @vivi-guerra     @Sanfranciscocablecar @iloveshawnieboi    @bookwormandtea    @ughhhitsafan       @spideyboix   @strawberryblogg    @lovely-Harry-styles    @holographic84     @sohani02          @kialawley7274     @odetostep    @omaha00 @Havethetimeeofyourlife       @Kylaharvey54       @mv-am

[jungshookz]

hi cee !! i just thought of how cute coach!jungkook would be where he trains little kids and one day y/n drops off her little brother at practice and sees this cute new coach and is suddenly volunteering to bring snacks for the next game lol

➺ pairing: jeon jungkook x reader

➺ genre: if it isn’t obvious by now this is 110% fLUFF, y/n is an obnoxious older sister but we love her, banana milk and animal crackers for everyone!!!!

➺ wordcount: 3.5k

➺ note: hi i want coach!jungkook to hurl a soccer ball at me thanks 

(gif isn’t mine!)

                                       ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* 　　 *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

“alright, twerp.” you crank the brakes before punching the unlock button on the dashboard “get outta my car.”

you push your sunglasses up to the top of your head before turning to look at lucas in the back seat and raising a brow

…

why is he not moving

“…mommy always walks me to the field.”

oh dear lord

you have places to be and people to sEE

more specifically you have to pick yoongi up at his apartment because you guys are going to watch that new spiderman movie together and you typically like to get there early so that you have more time to decide what you’re going to do in terms of snacks

“well, mommy didn’t drop you off today. sissy did.”

okay quick note: maybe don’T address yourself as sissy ever again

“-big boys walk themselves to the field.” you point out before glancing over at said field “y’know, lu, the world is a big, scary soccer field that you’re going to have to face alone one day…” you sigh and shake your head playfully as you yank the keys out of the ignition

of course you’re going to walk him to the field

you just like messing with him

“-you might as well get a head start now.” you unbuckle your seatbelt before opening the door

“…maybe next year, when i turn 6.” lucas mutters and kicks his legs against the seat

you can’t help but snort at his comment before shutting the door

your parents insist that lucas was planned but let’s be real

he’s more of a… happy accident!

the boy is sixteen years younger than you

he’s 5!

you’re 21!

a sixteen year age gap is never intentIONAL

nevertheless you still love him more than you love yourself

he’s a sweet boy!!!

he actually never went through the whole terrible twos phase and for that you are grateful because you’re pretty sure 18 year old y/n would’ve willingly flung him out the window in a heartbeat

and you know for a fact that he worships you

well

alright

not reaLLy

but he’s a good little brother and you’re a good older sister and you’re just glad that the two of you get along

you just like acting like he’s a little stiNker all the time because it’s fun seeing him get worked up

>:-)

“by the way, don’t tell mom i didn’t put your car seat in my car.” you help lucas out of the car before reaching in to grab his bag for him

you were going to be a responsible older sibling and put his car seat in for him but there were so many things to click and clack and lock and pop and honEstly you just didn’t have the energy to put it in your car so you just buckled him in and made sure to drive a little less recklessly

also you didn’t see the point in installing it in your car since this is going to be the only time you’re ever going to drop him off at his soccer practice session

your mom usually drops him off because duh

she’s m o m

but she had an emergency meeting at work and your dad is on a business trip for the entire week which means that yoU have to take care of him for the afternoon

which is fine!

except you made plans with yoongi, as mentioned earlier

which means you need to get this show on the road if you’re going to get back on the road to get to the show  

“okay, as long as you don’t tell mom i threw my grapes away.”

“wha- you threw your grapes away?!” you gawk at lucas as you shove your keys into your pocket “are you kidding me? you could’ve given them to me! those grapes were organic, too! they were the goOD juicy grapes!”

lucas smiles sheepishly before shrugging

goD

kids these days

throwing away their damn juicy organic non-gmo grapes

what a waste!

“what time am i supposed to come and pick you up again?”

“6:30” lucas hums in response as he swings his hand with yours

hm

the movie is set to end at 7

…how mad would your mom be with you if you made lucas wait an extra half hour in the dark for you?

u know what

it’s a risk you’re going to have to be willing to take

you are SO brave

not all heroes wear capes

“any preferences for dinner? mom won’t be home til late so it’s just the two of us.” you glance down at him as the two of you approach the field

there are already a bunch of other kids there with their parents

usually the parents just sit on the side and watch

and you would totally stay and watch but like…

spiderman > watching a group of sweaty 5 year olds running around and tripping over themselves

“mcdonalds!” lucas grins excitedly

he likes it when you’re in charge of dinner because it actually means that he’s in charge of dinner and he aLways likes it when he gets to choose what to eat for dinner

one time he asked for spaghetti tacos and you just gave him spaghetti tacos with no complaint

it’s amazing!

you’re a pushover for him and he knoWs it

“alrighty. but i’m getting the apple slices for you instead of the fries because you threw your grapes out.”

lucas immediately deflates

oh

u win some u lose some

“okay, bud. i’ll see you at 7!” you chirp before dropping to your knees to give lucas a goodbye hug  

“6:30” lucas corrects you smartly and you resist the urge to roll your eyes

uRgh

you don’t want to miss the ending of spiderman!!!!!!! what if you miss something mAjor that links to the next spiderman movie?!

whaTEver you’ll just watch it again when it eventually gets on netflix

anyways

back to business

one huGE perk of being an older sibling is the fact that you get to embarrass your younger siblings any time and anywhere

it’s your given right!

you’ve earned it

…and this is one of those times

“oH i’m going to miss my lulu so much-“ you’re practically suffocating lucas considering how tightly you’re squeezing him and you can’t help but giggle as you squish sloppy kisses to his chubby cheek

you don’t want him to ever grow up because you lovE kissing his cheeks

they were exTra chubby when he was younger

he’s starting to lose some baby fat :’(

lucas whines and starts to shove at your chest “stop it, my friends are watching!!!”

“well they’re just jealous because they don’t have an older sister as cool as-“ you immediately cut yourself off because-

holy SHIT

who the friG is thAT

it’s almost as if time itself slows down when you’re suddenly made aware of this very beautiful human being

warm brown eyes that you can already envision yourself drowning in

a bright bunny smile tugging at the corners of his mouth

honey caramel brown hair peeking out from underneath a plain black cap

two small, silver hoops hanging from his ears

he’s wearing a plain black hoodie paired with a pair of plain black shorts but somehow he’s making it look like he just walked straIght off a paris fashion week runway  

he has that boyish quality about him that’s making you weak in your knees

and to top it all off

he’s great with kids

your ovaries are quaking

he laughs and throws his head back before giving one of the boys a fist bump and getting back up on his knees

is it weird that you think his thighs are hot?

…yeah that’s a little weird

get it together

you pull away from lucas before resting back on your heels

you reach out to grasp onto his shoulders to make it seem like you’re having a serious conversation with him because let’s face it this is a very serious conversation

“lu. i’m going to ask you a question, and i want you to answer me honestly.” you look him dead in the eye

“…wha-“

“don’t make it obvious, but… is that your coach?” your eyes flicker over his shoulder and lucas whIPS around to look at where you’re looking

okay

way to make it nOt obvious

“mhm! that’s coach jungkook.”

huh

coach jungkook

that has a nice ring to it

he looks to be around your age which is vEry appealing

working man with a stable job

…you’re into it

lucas is obviously blissfully unaware of the way you’re practically drooling over his coach because the next thing you know- “hi coach!!!!!!” lucas waves wildly and starts bouncing up and down excitedly when coach jungkook glances towards your guys’ general direction

you immediately get up off the ground and reach down to dust your knees off

you should’ve worn something cuter had you known lucas’ coach was going to look like that

“hey, buddy!” jungkook leans down to ruffle lucas’ hair when he rushes over to hug his knees “you ready for a fun session?”

you feel your heart skip a beat when he looks up at you and offers you a friendly smile

o god

“hi! i’m jungkook.” he sticks his hand out for you to shake and oH sweet lord even his hands are pretty

“hi…!” you clear your throat and shake his hand briefly “i’m y/n, i’m… uh, i’m lucas’ sister. older sister.”

okay

you’re not sure why you had to throw in that last detail

you’re obviously his older sister you waLNUT

“ah, that makes sense. usually lucas comes with your guys’ mom, so i was just curious… are you going to stay and watch? there’s plenty of space to sit…” he gestures over to where the parents are and you’re about this close to texting yoongi and cancelling your guys’ plans together

spiderman

“she can’t!” lucas blurts out “-she’s watching spiderman with yoongi!”

uh oh

lucas is blowing your chances with coach jungkook right in front of ur eyES

“yoongi- riGht, yeah, i’m watching spiderman with- lu, why don’t you go and warm up with your friends, hm?” you nudge him a little and he nods before ziPPing right off to join his pals

a beat of silence goes by

“yoongi’s my friend. just my friend.” you clear your throat again before glancing at your watch

“good to know…!” jungkook trails off and purses his lips slightly

okay

this interaction is going downhill vEry fast

“i… should probably go if i’m going to get to the movies on time but thank you for the invitation to stay!” you chuckle lightly and jungkook nods in acknowledgement “i’ll see you later? when i come to pick lucas up? it was nice meeting you…?”

you are a hoT mess

you’re all over the place

why are you phrasing everything as a question?

what’s wrong with you?

you complete moron?  

jungkook can’t help but watch as you jog back to your car

hm

lucas never mentioned an older sister

a very pretty older sister, as a matter of fact

of course, lucas doesn’t really mention anything besides a) soccer, b) snacks, and c) power rangers

interesting

very interesting

“how come you’re driving me to practice again?” lucas’ brows knit together in confusion as he looks at you through the front mirror

needless to say he was very much confused when you came to pick him up from school… again

the act of you picking him up from school isn’t weird but usually you only pick him up maybe once every two months

but this is your sixth time picking him up this month

so yeah

it’s a liiiiiittle weird

“because i wanted to give mom… another day off!” you smile brightly and turn on your signal before smoothly swerving to the right and heading down the familiar path to the field

“oh.” lucas nods and slumps back down in his car seat

about five seconds go by before he speaks up again

“how come you have so many drinks and crackers back here?”

your eyes flicker up to the front mirror again and you see him leaning over to look into the huge tote bag sitting next to him

“you know, lu…” you sigh and shake your head “-as your generous, thoughtful, veRy caring older sister, i just want to make sure you have enough energy for practice which is why i took it upon myself to provide nourishment for you and your little friends!”

“…what’s a noorushmint-”

“-just out of curiosity-“ you veer right into your usual parking spot before cranking the brakes

you turn to look at lucas over your shoulder “has coach jungkook… said anything about me?”

“i- oOH banana milk!!!!!!” lucas grins excitedly and pulls one carton out of your bag

here’s the thing

as mentioned earlier this is your sixth time picking lucas up from school and driving him to practice

that means that this is your sixth time seeing jungkook

and each time, he somehow becomes more and more attractive which mEans that you progressively get more and more nervous and awkward-flirty with him each time you see him

every time he looks at you you get all weak in the knees and your palms get sweaty and you end up regurgitating some lame joke about soccer

every time he laughs at your lame jokes about soccer you feel your heart skip a beAt

and you’re obsessed with how attractive he looks when he’s focused on something

he does this thing where he pokes his tongue into his cheek and it just-

oOh it just gets to you

“hey, twerp-“ lucas glances back at you as the two of you start trekking down the grassy hill to get to the field “don’t tell your friends that you already drank a banana milk in the car otherwise they’re going think that i’m playing favourites which i guess i kinda am buT-“

“y/n!” you immediately freeze when you hear jungkook call your name and you neaRly trip over your feet in surprise “-let me help you with that!”

you swallow thickly before offering jungkook a bright smile “hey! oh, that’s so nice of you…” he takes the two tote bags from you eaSily

what the heck

you were out of breath just picking them up and he’s acting as if they’re as light as feathers

you feel your mouth go dry when you catch a glimpse of his biceps flexing

the lord is testing you toDay

“hi coach!” lucas greets enthusiastically

jungkook grins down at lucas before wiggling his brows “someone’s certainly very energetic today-“

“y/n gave me an extra banana milk and i drank it all in thirty seconds!!!!!”

well

he totally just blew your cover

“you said you wouldn’t tell!” you scold playfully and lucas giggles before dropping his bag to the floor and spRinting over to his friends

“banana milk, huh?” jungkook peeks into one of them before looking over at you

he loves banana milk!!!!!!!!

“banana milk and animal crackers.” you correct and jungkook raises a hand in defence

oh fRick

he loves animal crackers too!!!!!!

you are the girl of his dreams!!!!!!

,.,.,.but like.,,., in a super casual way

because he hasn’t known you for very long

but it’s safe to say that he’s already become veRy fond of you and your company

you’re super friendly

and you’re super funny

and you’re super pretty

it’s also super cute when you’re cheering on for lucas on the sidelines

whenever he scores a goal you jump up and down on your feet and clap suPer excitedly and basically scREAM for him

jungkook loves how supportive you are even though this is a kiddie soccer game and the stakes are so unbelievably low

and his heart melted into a warm puddle that time lucas tripped and scraped his knee and you imMEdiately rushed to his aid

you patched him up and even kissed his boo-boo!!!!!! (lucas was a little embarrassed by that) ((he wouldn’t have minded if u did that at home but u did it in front of all of his bROS and he’s like the resident Cool Guy))

it doesn’t get any cuTEr than that!!!!!!

and jungkook knows that he’s here to coach but he’s finding it vEry hard to do his job whenever you’re around

because you smell like warm vanilla and your laugh is contagious and your smile makes his stomach do flip-flops

and the fact that you brought snacks and drinks for the kids is honestly just the icing on the cakE

“wanna split a banana milk?” jungkook jumps in surprise when he feels a gentle tap on his shoulder

“wh- sorry, what was that? i was, uh, thinking about… stuff.” he clears his throat

wow

talk about s m o o t h

“i put the bag down for five seconds and the kids went wild but i managed to snag one carton without losing an arm.” you snort and poke the straw through the top “you wanna split one with me?”

he knows you’re not a mindreader but it’s taking every single one of his brain cells to try to noT think about how kissable your lips look right now

you turn slightly before holding the carton up for him to take a sip and you just have the cutest smile on your face right now and before he knows it he-

“do you wanna grab dinner sometime?” jungkook blurts out and his eyes widen in surprise when he realises that he just asked you out on a date

cuRse him and his complete lack of fiLTER

your own eyes widen in surprise and you blink owlishly

where did thAt come from

you’re not complaining or anything because yes of couRse you want to go out on a date with jungkook but heLLo where did that come from!!!!!!

“um, i-“

“oh, god. sorry! i’m sorry, that was totally- ah, jeez-“ jungkook groans quietly and reaches up to adjust his hat

“-jungkook-“

“-i’m sorry, you’re just really nice and pretty so i thought-“ he can feel his face burning hotter than the damn sun “-i just feeL like we get along really well even though we don’t really know each other buT we can always get to know each other on a date-“

“-yeah, you’re right about that-“

“-i don’t know what i’m thinking!!! i haven’t gone out on a date in a long time so maybe it’s not a-“

“-jungkook!” you slap a hand over his mouth and he stumbles backwards a little from the impact

“…myeah?” his voice is muffled and you give him a warning look so he shuts up quickly

you pull your hand away before adjusting your cardigan a little “i would… i would love to grab dinner with you sometime.”

“oh!” jungkook’s voice is slightly pitchy and he clears his throat quickly “cool. sick.” he says with a lower voice before sniffing and looking back over at the boys

it’s totally whatever

he’s cool

it’s casual

dinner is casual

he’s like… suuuuper chill about it, bro

“mm. sick, indeed.” you tease lightly before nudging his side “…you still wanna split the banana milk with me or not? because i’m going to inhale this entire thing if you don’t want any.”

(the entire time you and jungkook are taking turns taking sips of the banana milk he can’t help but feel like he’s indirectly kissing u)

((but whatever))

(((he’s like…. suuuuuuper chill about it, brO)))

help me help you make your wishes come tru (aka send me a request)

drabble masterlist // main masterlist

[captnbarnesrogers]

Fall: Pick Your Lover Over Prom Dresses

Pairing/Characters: CollegeAU!Bucky Barnes x Reader Warnings: Jealous Bucky, swearing, not much lmao alotta fluff Chapter Summary:  WC: 2.3k+ A/N: 3 more chapters to go!!

PREVIOUSLY FALL MASTERLIST

When you woke up from your deep slumber, you were in Bucky’s arms, warm and secure. You felt more comfortable to walk down the stairs by yourself. To your surprise, Winnie had left a note on the fridge that she and George had gone to work for the day. She added that the plates of food for you and Bucky were inside the fridge, ready to be heated and eaten. You prepared two cups and made some coffee for the both of you. You heated up the food and placed them on a tray, carefully bringing them up the stairs. You placed the tray on the bedside table and snuck yourself in between Bucky’s arms once again.

He began to turn in his sleep before finally opening his eyes and peeping at you.

“Am I in heaven? Because I think I’ve seen an angel.” You laughed as he kissed your cheek.

“If you’ve seen me, you’re probably in Hell.” He let out a groggy chuckle, his arm resting across your stomach, “Hungry?”

“Starving.”

“Well, I’ve made coffee and heated up some food.” He sat up as you handed him his mug, taking a sip straight away.

“If this is Hell, I wanna stay here forever.” You handed him a fork and you both shared the plate.

Suddenly, there was a knock on the door. Enters Rebecca, panic flushes on her face. You stood up from your spot and rushed over to her.

“Are you okay?” You asked with concern. She took a deep breath before beginning.

“Jessica bailed on me, now I have no one to pick prom dresses with and I’m gonna look like shit and Alex won’t take me if I look like shit.” She says without a breath.

“Well, if Alex won’t take you because you look like shit, he’s an idiot.” Bucky explains with a mouthful, “That’s why I’m dating Y/N, she looks like shit all the time.” You glared at him jokingly.

“Your brother’s right, prom night should be a time to have fun with your friends, not to focus on boys.”

“I dunno Y/N, I lost my-“

“James!” You laughed, “Your sister doesn’t need to know that.”

“Yeah, gross, you gremlin.” He couldn’t stop laughing.

“Besides your brother being stupid, I’d be happy to help you pick a dress out.” You gave her a hug, Bucky watching with adoration with his eye – although he hid it quite well behind his mug of coffee, “Half the fun is picking out a dress.”

“Oh, thank you, thank you, thank you!!” She exclaimed, embracing you tighter. Rebecca looked at Bucky whilst you both hugged and mouthed, ‘Marry her.’ He shook his head and smiled, hiding his blush.

“Okay, let me get ready and we can go.” She nodded and ran off to her room to do the same. You walked back toward Bucky who finished off his coffee, you planted a kiss on his cheek, “Drive us over?”

“Sure.” He croaked, taken aback by your actions. Surprised at his tone, he laughed, “Yeah, yeah sure.”

He watched you from the bed getting ready. A sweater, some jeans, a beanie; all so simple but you made it look like something that took hours to put together. He began thinking through your entire friendship. How you were the only relationship he put in effort to keep and maybe this was an excuse to finally up the courage he didn’t have back at the university. He shook himself out of the thought and brought the fact back to himself that this was a fake relationship and it was only going to last two weeks. After the two weeks, you’d look back at him as Bucky: your flirtatious friend. You snapped him out of his thoughts.

“Helloooo? Earth to James Barnes?” You giggled.

“Yeah, sorry! I’ll just put some pants on.”

“Okay.”

Rebecca rushed down the stairs excitedly. Her crossbody bag over her shoulders. She described her perfect dress to you. Light filling her eyes and smile plastered across her face.

“Okay so, it’s going to be a red silk dress, right?” You nodded, “with like a dropped neckline and spaghetti straps.”

“Oooh! That’s going to look so good!” You rubbed her back as she entered the backseat of the car and you made your way to the front seat.

“And I’m thinking rose gold hoop earrings and red strappy heels.” Bucky rolled his eyes as he started the engine of the car.

“Geez, it’s senior prom, not a wedding, Bec.”

“Leave her alone, James, I think every seventeen year old senior girl should have a show stopping dress.” Bec agreed with you, hitting the back of his head, truly showing the relationship that she and Bucky had.

Rebecca asked for the Bluetooth in the car to Bucky’s demise. He scrunched his nose at every song that played which made you laugh. He parked in front of the dress shop and stopped the engine.

“Thank the Lord that’s over!” Bec rolled her eyes at her brother’s annoyance, “I’m gonna go meet some friends while you guys pick some dresses, that alright with you, doll?” You nodded. Bec leaned in the middle compartment of the backseat, eyes hopeful, “What do you want, squirt?” You both looked at her.

“Well?” She began.

“What?”

“Aren’t you guys gonna kiss goodbye?” You blushed. Bucky choked on air.

“Um, yeah, of course we were about to!” You said leaning into Bucky and giving him a peck.

“You guys are the most unromantic couple on earth… That? That was pathetic.” She exited the car and entered the store. You finally breathed out and your cheeks flushed a deeper crimson.

“That bad, huh?” You asked Bucky nervously.

“I’m not complaining.” He couldn’t stop staring at you and he began to lean in. His hand snaking its way to your cheek and behind your neck. He looked at your lips and back to your eyes. This was it. This was the kiss that would seal the deal.

Multiple loud knocks made their way through the window, disrupting the moment.

“I’m gonna kill her.” You smiled down.

“Duty calls.”

“I’ll see you later?” You nod and he plants a kiss on your cheek. When you exit the car, the icy cold breeze of the air hit your cheek, making you grasp a hold of your body against it. You entered the store and Rebecca was already trying on dresses. Bright lights shone down on the display dresses and the sound of the heaters running through the vents were loud. Bec grabbed a dress from the rack, a little bit different to how she described but she had stated that she was ‘keeping an open mind’. It made you laugh.

“Are you going to try some dresses on as well?” She asked. You shook your head.

“No, but I’ll be brutally honest with the dresses you try on?” You both came to that agreement. She tried on dress after dress after dress. Nothing seemed to look nice and fitting on her until, she found the red dress that she had described a few hours beforehand, “Now that, looks amazing on you.”

“Mind zipping me up, please?” You walked over and pulled the zip up. The dress fitting perfectly on her, “He likes you, you know?” You hummed in response, “Bucky, I can tell, he really likes you, loves you even.”

“Why do you say that?”

“Well, for starters, he brought you home.” She looked at herself in the mirror and walked over to the shoe section, picking out black strappy heels, “He doesn’t do that, he likes to keep his love life and home life completely separate.” She sat down and put the heels on before standing up and walking over to the mirror again.

“That might just be to keep your mom from asking questions.”

“Maybe.” She turned to you and smirked, “Also he looks to you a lot, even when someone else is speaking, ever notice that he’s always following you around like a lost puppy?” Come to think of it, now that she mentioned, he really did, even back at the university, “and how he’s always concerned about where you are, what you’re doing, and pushing himself in situations and places where you are?”

“Your brother and I have been friends for a long time, Bec, I’m sure it doesn’t mean anything.”

“I don’t know, Y/N, sounds like he’s pretty smitten, huh?” You couldn’t help but blush at the thought, “I mean, I guess you’ll just have to wait until he gets jealous, it’s always the better tell.” She winked. The sales lady walked over with a smile.

“That’s so fitting on you, love!” She fixed the straps and continued, “it’s the only one in the store, guaranteed no one else would have this dress at your prom!” Bec jumped with joy, clapping her hands together. She took off the dress and the heels, taking them to the counter to be bought.

“Do you wanna get a smoothie or something?” She asked.

“Know any good places?”

“You’ll have to learn that I know all the best places.” She said with confidence, propping up and walking down the street. You were distracted from how much Bec and yourself were talking that you didn’t notice someone heading towards you. Before you knew it, you had bumped into them.

“Oh my god,” you shrieked, “I am so sorry!” You looked up to find your friend, Peter, a guy from your screenwriting class.

“Hi, Y/N, what are you doing here?”

“Peter!” You gave him a hug and a smile, “I’m actually here with Bucky.” You turned to Bec, not wanting your little lie to get busted, “Why don’t you head on in? I’ll follow.” She nodded and when she entered, the bell above the door rang out.

“Little sister duty?”

“Yeah, kind of, she needed a prom dress.”

Meanwhile, in the smoothie shop, Bec was texting Bucky. He had asked where you were and she told him where you both were. She had also mentioned to Bucky that you had bumped into a friend. Almost to his convenience, he was nearby and ready to pick you both up.

He looked from afar; you laughed at Peter’s jokes and conversed with wonder. Something bubbled up inside of him. Almost like a fire ready to explode with each word that came out of Peter’s mouth. He started to wonder if you ever laughed like that at his jokes, if you listened with wonder in every conversation you both had. Finally, you both hugged goodbye and you entered the smoothie shop, following Bec.

“Hey!” Bec greeted with a smile, “I got you one of my favourites, it’s an orange sherbet smoothie.” You took a sip.

“Tastes good.” The door bell rang through the shop and in entered Bucky, “Hey.” You leaned in to kiss his cheek and he smiled but almost as if he didn’t want to accept it. His demeanour had changed from this morning and it made your stomach turn. Had something happened whilst you and Bec were picking out a dress?

“Ready to go?” He asked.

“You don’t want a smoothie, Buck?” He shook his head, no. Bec shrugged toward you and stood up from her seat, grabbing the plastic which contained her dress and her shoes. He almost raced to the car as rain started to spit onto the ground.

The ride on the way home was silent. Although, Bec was too busy to notice. You did though. There wasn’t a flirtatious comment coming anytime soon. You were so curious but didn’t want to bring up whatever it was in front of his sister. You tried to put your hand on his shoulder, comforting him somehow but he shrugged your hand off of him. It was you. He was upset at you. You don’t know what you had done but you were so desperate to know why he’d suddenly become so cold. He parked the car in the driveway and walked to the door, opening it and stepping inside. Bec followed and gave you a smile.

“Thank you for today, Y/N, I had fun.” You leaned forward and gave her a hug.

“No problem.” You looked around the room and noticed Bucky had disappeared, “Well, if you’re happy to do this again, I am too.” She nodded and headed into the kitchen. You made your way upstairs and entered the room. Bucky kept himself busy as you sat on the bed, “Is everything okay?”

“I don’t know, Y/N, is it?”

“I don’t even know what I did, Bucky.” You stood up from the bed and followed his each step. The room was quite small but you wondered why he felt miles away, “I can’t read your mind.”

“Didn’t say you could.”

“You’re acting like a child!” You stated, making him scoff. He cleaned his desk, stacking notebooks and notepads on top of each other. You walked over to him and hugged him from behind, “Please, Bucky?” He sighed.

“I just-” He turned to face you, “I don’t know, I don’t have the right to but I do- Bec told me that you bumped into Pete.” He hand made its way to your back, rubbing with comfort.

“And?”

“Don’t make me say it, Y/N.” He kissed your head, “I’m sorry.” You’d suddenly put two and two together. You and Pete. He had seen you with Pete.

“You’re jealous.”

“I don’t have an excuse to get me out of this.” He chuckled nervously.

“And you’re jealous because?” You were baiting him to say it, a smile plastered on your face. He shook his head, “Well, you don’t need to be.” You looked up at him. Your hand snaking its way to his cheek. Pulling him down, you planted a kiss on his lips.

“I’m convinced.” He laughed.

----

TAGLIST:

@captianlibby​

[nancythebisexualslutwheeler]

Reddie Tutor!AU

So what if we do a tutor!Eddie AU, where everything is #normal, it’s just shitty, normal HS. So Eddie is a junior and he’s on the track team and he’s little but his speed makes up for it.

He’s smart as hell, for real. In all AP classes and honors. I mean in math they only offer AP Calc as the highest option- which is what you need to pass twelfth grade. It’s not hard, even though it’s AP, the school just needed the extra funding. In Derry, everyone needed extra money.

So he’s smart and does track and that’s about all his mom allows him to do. She barely allows track, but the insurance money from his dad’s death is running out and words like scouts and scholarships made their mark. She never left the house of course, so it was nice for him to be able to have something to himself. It had taken a lot of convincing, but finally it was his. And then his principal who’d wanted him to apply to their student council and run for class president and more things that Eddie’s mother wouldn’t allow him to do, asks him to be a tutor. He will need to dedicate one afternoon after school and his Saturday mornings. He only has two friends, Bev and Ben, who are dating each other, so no one is too worried about him. Not all the time at least. (That’s mean. They’re good friends, he’s just bitter.)

He accepts the job without even asking who he’s tutoring. Mainly because tutoring means they’d have to have a chance of passing the class. Richie Tozier does not have a chance in hell at passing the class.

Cue mean girls style montage... let me tell you about Richie Tozier. He’s a dick. He’s cocky and rude and dirty and he’s 19 and this will be his second go at his senior year. So no, he has no chance of passing.

He can’t very well say no after he’s said yes so on Wednesday afternoon, he’s in the library, in the back corner, to avoid being seen caught dead with the loser, when Richie shows up.

Yadayada when Richie sees him he has a field day.

But eventually the two find an uneasy relationship.

So I’m here for when:

***

Richie gets a D on his first test because it’s not an F!!!! And he pats Eddie so hard on the shoulder he’s sure he’ll have a bruise.

***

One day Richie is staring at Eddie. His legs more precisely.

“What are you wearing?”

“Track shorts,” he holds a leg out. It’s obvious. They’re purple.

Richie rolls his eyes,

“No shit.”

“Why?”

“Practice after this.”

He nods...

“Um, what kind of-“

“Track.”

“Oh no shit.”

“You run?”

He snorts,

“I only run from cops.”

                                             ***

  “Hey I can’t meet on Saturday this week.”  

“Why?” Richie demands. He looks a bit frantic, their test is on Monday. But Eddie also knows it probably has to do with the way Richie put his hand on Eddie’s leg as he drove them home. Eddie had reassured him with a small smile, but he figured the older boy still needed validation.

“I’ve got a meet.”

Richie raises an eyebrow,

“Yeah,” Eddie itches the back of his head.

“Where?”

“Gravesville.”

“Oh.”

“I have one on Friday night too though. Here.”

And Richie makes some dumb excuse about being busy and yet on. Friday night he’s out there. Well, at the bottom of the bleachers right before the fence and he watches Eddie and smokes a cigarette.

And Eddie is so shook and ends up running over to him after like wtf? And Richie’s wearing a leather JACKET and they lean against the fence and chat and Richie lights a cigarette and Eddie can’t take his eyes off of his mouth and then Richie offers him some and Eddie’s like ... ahhh.. but then does and chokes and Richie’s like alright my innocent bon bon, none for you.

                                                          ***

Then Richie starts bringing them coffee on Saturday’s. He’s got a new job. He always makes Eddie’s coffee perfectly. Like he’s memorized it or something. A hazelnut vanilla latte with less oat milk (he’s lactose intolerant) than espresso and three sugars. Sue him, he likes his coffee sweet.

Richie is vegan. Eddie about falls over when he starts talking about the environment and passionately. The mistreatment of people of color comes up and the fact those words just came out of stoner Richie Tozier’s  mouth is making him rethink everything he knew about the world.

                                                           ***

Richie fucking lifts weights which wouldn’t be a problem if he arms weren’t so fucking buff.

                                                       ***

Okay the thing is Eddie knows he shouldn’t like Richie, but’s he’s just so damn attractive that it’s hard. His dark hair and beaming blue eyes and ridiculous glasses that happen to work for him. He has a goddamn hoop nose ring and he’s always biting at his chapped lips. He has a chest tattoo (Eddie has only seen what pokes out of the too tight, stretched out necks of his t shirts. He wears assorted band tees or white T-shirts that ride up when he stretches his arms over his head and shoves off the treasure trail that Eddie wants to lick.

So anyway the first time Richie takes off the flannel he’s wearing over a T-shirt, Eddie balks at the artfully decorated tree on his arm. It’s an elegant oak tree with autumn leaves adorning the branches. It’s... exquisite, and before Eddie can help himself, he’s reaching out to touch it. He stops himself before he does and when he looks up, Richie is smiling at him. He offers his arm and Eddie traces the tree,

“It's beautiful.”

“Well thanks Eddie spaghetti,” he says.

Eddie realizes he’s still touching his arm and quickly pulls away.

                                                      ***

It only takes a few times of mentioning his mom before Richie asks. Richie is trying to offer to drive him home after a study session runs late and it’s dark.

“You’re not walking home.”

“It’s fine, I promise.”

“You scared of my driving skills?” Richie swings his keys around his index finger.

“No, I mean yes, of course, but my mom’ll flip.”

“You say that a lot. What’s her deal?”

Eddie pales,

“Nothing. Just overprotective.”

They head to the door, Richie still insisting on a ride, and when they step out into the chilly fall air, Eddie wraps his windbreaker around himself tighter and then Richie offers again, knowingly.

“You have to drop me off around the corner.”

Richie looks at him curiously and then nods,

“Of course. Can’t have mom seeing you with big bad huh?”

“Yeah, you’re not meeting the parents material, huh?”

“That’s what they tell me,” he shrugs, “As long as they let me sneak into their bedroom.”

Eddie makes a face. Girl’s rooms.

***

One Saturday Richie doesn’t show up. He thought they were over this, Richie ditching. He hadn’t even texted. So Eddie is annoyed. No pissed. Because it’s 8am and Richie isn’t even there to give him a coffee. So he calls because he’s fuming.

Richie sounds like shit,

“Hello? Eddie? Wait. What day is it? Fuck. Eddie I am so sorry. I’m sick as fuck.”

Speaking of which, Eddie doesn’t remember seeing him in class on Thursday.

“You couldn’t call? Text?”

“Bro, I’ve been in bed for days. I’m about to die of dehydration, my parents are out of town and I can barely manage to get out of bed to pee so no, I couldn’t text.”

Eddie pauses. Hesitates. He does it to be nice. That’s all.

“What’s your address? I can bring you a few things.”

“That’s unnecessary.”

“I’m not, I’m not taking a no for an answer.”

Eddie buys too much but he can’t stop himself. About three kinds of cold and flu meds, Tylenol, cough syrup, OJ and sprite and saltines. A couple of magazines. He’s pathetic.

Richie answers the door looking like death and Eddie is Lowkey in love because he looks like a muffin. (A very sick muffin) but a muffin nevertheless.

                                                         ***

Richie returns the favor by inviting Eddie over for a movie and pizza night. He thinks about it because they’re not friends. But Richie seems sincere and he did take care of Richie. He’d changed his bed sheets and everything. They haven’t mentioned it.

So Richie’s house is nice and he has a thirteen year old sister who is way cooler than Eddie was at 13. Anyway Richie orders pizza and he orders Eddie a regular pizza but he wants to try Richie’s because it looks good. And he does and it’s good and Richie just grins and turns on some dumb Netflix movie.

They absolutely do not cuddle, but Eddie sits a touch closer than he needs to and Richie’s arm ends up draped behind him on the couch and it’s nice and goddammit, Eddie is gay for Richie Tozier.

                                                      ***

Richie never seems to tire of him, or make any move to stop their tutoring sessions even when he gets a B on their latest test.

                                                   ***

One day it’s raining and Richie is sitting across from him and parts of his white shirt are see through. And his chest is hairy and Eddie is in to it.

                                               ***

Richie’s birthday comes and goes and Eddie brings him a single German chocolate cupcake complete in a container and everything.

Richie doesn’t stop absolutely beaming. He eats the whole thing and fawns over Eddie.

“It was so good. Best thing I’ve ever put in my mouth,” he says with a wink.

“Richie,” he complains.

“Scouts honor,” he salutes, “the very best.”

“Gross!”

                                                       ***

So idk what happens but somehow they’re alone together, maybe in like a bedroom. Richie’s got his big hands open in his lap, palm up, and Eddie is firmly pressed against him and Eddie nudges Richie,

“You’re a lot cooler than I thought you’d be.”

“Aww, you too Eddie spaghetti.”

“Puh-lease fuck off.”

“Never.”

Eddie nudges him,

“Promise?”

Richie looks down at him then,

“Promise.”

Eddie stares at him and licks his lips.

Richie leans down slowly, giving Eddie plenty of time to move away. He doesn’t.