#BIOWARE MY WORST ENEMY BUT HOLY SHIT

[pigeonrocks]

I love them so much

alt versions under the cut

[meggannn]

3, 5, 8

@ferociousqueak and @servantofclio also asked for 3, what a coincidence!

3. What was your big “Wow” or “Oh Shit” moment in Mass Effect? Approaching the Citadel? Seeing Sovereign take off on Eden Prime? Something else entirely? I’ll try to think of the biggest ‘moments’ for me… Unfortunately I was spoiled for a few things but even still there were a few times I was a little surprised/startled, like “I didn’t think they’d do that" like when Saren killed Nihlus (“what the fuck?”), or Sovereign talks to you on Virmire (“hot damn lol”), or you drive into the citadel through the relay statue after realizing the Citadel itself is a relay (“HOT DAMN LOL”). but the biggest intense, reactionary moments for me were:

I think the first time I took a second and kind of sat back in awe of the story was talking to Vigil on Ilios; this VI talking to a strange alien 50,000 years in the future, surrounded by scores of its dead brethren that it failed to save, in the slim hope that she might defeat what wiped them out, like, I realized how many times this had happened, how many histories and races that had been wiped out that Shepard would never fully know about, how many times THEY had each tried to warn future generations. it was the first time I got a sense of the grandness of the game and universe, and just how I’d barely scratched the surface. the music, tension, and overall level design was just really well done there.

the first “oh shit, did that really just happen?” moment was when we see Shepard’s profile close up against the black of space, and then we pan out to see her oxygen line has been cut, and her hands go to her throat as air escapes from her suit, and her body flies out into the darkness and becomes a speck and we don’t follow her. and then we see MASS EFFECT 2. like, what the fuck bioware?????!!!!

the first “oh shit” chills-down-my-spine moment was I think when I brought Garrus and Tali to the Collector ship, you meet no enemies but the sense of foreboding and claustrophobia that hovers over you as you travel through all the tunnels, and then you open up to this grand valley full of empty pods for future human victims, and Garrus says, “They’re going to target Earth.”

the Arrival DLC was another plot twist I said “oh shit” to that felt different, just because I genuinely thought Shepard would be able to save the day. I loved it though, I loved that we had a protagonist that failed. even though everyone supports/is behind you, like…. no other moment in the series really made me feel the weight of all the people Shepard couldn’t save. it wasn’t even a choice like “save the council vs sacrifice the council,” like, this was a mission that Shepard could not win, because sometimes you get always there too late, because that’s war, and also the nature of the work. it felt so realistic, added more depth to the gray morality (and really one of the most “Spectre-like” actions Shepard ever does imo) and I appreciated that we saw a character fail.

other misc “holy shit” moments: kalros taking down the reaper on tuchanka, SHEPARD FIGHTING A REAPER ON FOOT, and in the worst way possible, that short little sequence right after harbinger hits shepard in the beam run, and you hear someone’s voice saying “nobody made it” and the screen flicks back to light and everything’s fuzzy and bloody and slow, but through it all you see shepard GET UP, BE SHOT, AND KEEP WALKING. anyway i’m dead just thinking about that moment goodbye

5. Have you ever accidentally slept with Sha’ira the Consort? On purpose? LOL YEAH, JUST THE OTHER DAY (I’m replaying ME1 rn). I didn’t know that asking for more payment resulted in sleeping with her, I was just trying to be stingy on my renegade playthrough. Whoops.

8. What was your reaction the first time you realized the choice you had to make on Virmire? What was your choice the first time you played? This was one of the downsides of coming to the series late, I knew what the word “Virmire” meant and what choice I’d have to make :( I picked Ashley just ‘cause in the moment it made sense for Shepard to go back to save her (she’d planted the bomb) and I reasoned that Shepard could probably rationalize it to herself that she could save Kaidan too in time if she was quick enough. I also felt really bad that I’d accidentally triggered Kaidan’s romance without meaning to, knowing I’d romance Garrus later, and I didn’t want to flag any romances going into the next game. but I also just genuinely liked Ash too.

[warrentrolls]

Ⓐ bioware

ATTRACTIVENESS:

    repulsive ― hideous ― ugly ― not attractive ― unappealing ― not unattractive ― meh ― no preference ― ok ― mildly attractive ― nice looking ― cute ― adorable ― attractive ― pleasant on the eyes ― good looking ― hot ― sexy ― beautiful ― gorgeous ― hot damn ― would tap that ― perfect ― godlike ― holy fuck there are no words

[he’s so pretty how can anyone not think he’s gorgeous]

PERSONALITY:

    grating ― irritating ― frustrating ― boring ― confusing at best ― awkward ― unreasonable ― psychotic ― disturbing ― interesting ― engaging ― affectionate ― aggressive ― ambitious ― anxious ― artistic ― bad tempered ― bossy ― charismatic ― appealing ― unappealing ― creative ― courageous ― dependable ― unreliable ― unpredictable ― predictable ― devious ― dim ― extroverted ― introverted ― egotistical ― gregarious ― fabulous ― impulsive ― intelligent ― sympathetic ― talkative ― up beat ― peaceful ― calming ― badass ― flexible

[just because they smooched doesn’t mean that fear all went away. still tho... he believes in him]

HOW LIKELY THEY WOULD BE TO HAVE SEX WITH THEM.

    not if they were the last person on earth and the world was ending ― fuck no! ― never ― no way ― not likely ― not sure ― indifferent ― i’m asexual ― maybe ― probably ― it depends ― fairly likely ― likely ― yeah sure ― yes ― would tap that ― hell yes ― fuck yes! ― wishing that could happen right now ― as many times as possible ― we are already having sex

[HE’LL WAIT. HE GONNA TEASE BUT HE’LL WAIT]

LEVEL OF FRIENDSHIP:

    never in a million years ― worst of enemies ― enemies ― rivals ― indifferent ― neutral ― acquaintance ― friendly toward each other ― casual friends ― friends ― good friends ― best friends ― fuck buddies ― bosom buddies ― practically the same person ― would die for them ― true friends ― my only friend

[u have unlocked friendship w/ lacain. lacain will now die for you]

FIRST IMPRESSION OF THEM:

    i hate them so much ― i don’t like them ― i don’t trust them ― they annoy me ― they’re weird ― i’m indifferent ― meh ― they seem alright ― they’re growing on me ― truce ― i think i like them ― i like them ― i’m not sure if i trust them ― i trust them ― they’re cool ― they’re genuine ― i think we’re going to get along ― i really like them ― i think i’m in love ― oh fuck they’re hot ― i love them

[SPOOKY WEIRD DOCTOR MAN THAT TAKES HIS PAIN AWAY??? COOL I GUESS]

CURRENT IMPRESSION OF THEM:

    i hate them so much ― i don’t like them ― i don’t trust them ― they annoy me ― they’re weird ― i’m indifferent ― meh ― they seem alright ― they’re growing on me ― truce ― i think i like them ― i like them ― i’m not sure if i trust them ― i trust them ― they’re cool ― they’re genuine ― i think we’re going to get along ― i really like them ― i think i’m in love ― oh fuck they’re hot ― i love them

[sighs, finding out all the shit endale had to go through explained a lot and he just wants him to feel safer and happier.]

HOW GOOD OF A KISSER:

    worst kisser ever ― terrible ― bad ― awkward ― just okay ― alright ― pretty good ― good ― makes me moan ― excellent ― exciting ― oh god they’re good ― i dream about it ― fucking amazing ― absolute perfection ― we haven’t kissed

[we gotta work on endale like... staring at him the whole time lmAO]

[sleepymarmot]

MEA liveblog #8

I finished it! I’m free!

Multiplayer

Hell yeah level 9/10 rank I asari adept -- full extraction and top score on a silver APEX mission with bonus to combos! Against outlaws, but still. And I got an outlaw badge for it!

Yoo, two human female vanguard cards! And my Charger is now at X!

Looked up my statistics:

Dialogue:

Interrupts: 11

Casual: 151

Emotional: 187

Logical: 206

Professional: 187

Kills:

Kett: 983

Outlaws: 857

Remnant: 520

Wildlife: 377

Holy shit, the Pathfinder killed almost as many former Initiative members as the Initiative's enemies...

Melee: 276

Assault rifle: 60

Pistol: 135

Shotgun: 100

Sniper rifle: 59

Biotic: 679

Combat? Force?: 0

Tech: 316

Jump: 5

Construct: 35 (wow)

Combos: 777

Hello patch 1.05

Why did they remove the priming icon from Throw? Does it not prime anymore?! 

Good news: Throw still primes. Idk why they removed the button. Like misinforming their players?

Bad news: the game is super laggy. Did I set my graphics too high?

The fusion mod perk is still broken!

No, I don't have a new email, SAM! I got one from Peebee, very cute but referring to I don't know what.

Multiplayer

Kroguard level 7/rank I successfully extracted from Silver!

Maxed out Avenger and Katana, goodbyeeeee

Singleplayer

Fuck, I opened all my reward boxes and then realized the game loaded the autosave with the still-bugged fusion mod support :( Goodbye all my rewards ughh

I lowered the graphics to default but the game still keeps stuttering... I don't understand

Peebee on Voeld: "I should have dressed warmer" Sigh, once again game writers blame their sexist costume designs on female characters who have to wear them...

Finally I got to hear PB&J's conversations about asari reproduction myself...

SAM asked me about my romance and I picked the sappy option because it was the safest...

Journey to Meridian

I don't like how the patch changed my Ryder's face. The lips are too narrow and round now.

Damn, I should have taken Jaal. I knew the spoiler though. Want to know what from? A freaking side romance video I clicked because I was sure something so inconsequential wouldn't have spoilers. Ha!

Peebee says something like "They created life but the Archon wants to destroy it!!" in the most melodramatic tone. Ugh! The tendency to say overly sweet things like this is the worst part of her character.

Ha, screw you ascendant! I'm a bit offended that my rifle doesn't one-shot his orb. Ah well, I'm not wearing any weapon damage bonuses...

Oh, a Destroyer and a Fiend are fighting each other? Good, I'm not going to get involved.

The Destroyer won and came for us but had the decency to open up its chest as it turned to face us lol

I'm overusing Bio-converter + Life Support like hell on this mission lol... Too many bosses

lol nullifiers im not scared of you

Why is my mouth so small! It's bothering me.

Tempest

Lexi doesn't want to talk to me lol. Can't interact with her

Jaal's door is closed, I knew he'd have a lot to say

Well this conversation was saccharine. Jaal are you a positivity machine?!

Don't you "love" how you can go through the entire game not knowing that Gil is gay?! There's even a dialogue option about him "loving" Jill! This entire dialogue tree is a mess. At least everyone on tumblr has ranted about that so I don't have a lot to add. But even if you (try to) set the homophobia aside it's a mess. He talks about fathering a friend's child and you can't even be surprised because usually only romantic couples start families? And you can't even disapprove really, the most negative thing is "it's crazy" said in an awed, surprised tone of voice.

Cora I took you to Meridian and you have nothing to say?

More forum threads! And a shitload of emails!

Aw, Liam is such a good vivid character -- both the conversation and the email are great. I love his email attachments. I mean I'm still angry at him about the stupid, irresponsible, dangerous shit he did in his personal storyline, but he's definitely the most engaging of the male starter companions in ME.

Here's the Movie Night continuation, I was starting to worry it was broken...

The ship's doctor asks me to buy some booze on the Citad--the Nexus, why does it sound so familiar

Let's appreciate the fact that the "golden worlds" are not just inhabited -- they were created for someone other than us! The Initiative has even fewer rights to them than initially thought.

I'm glad Bioware sped up the galaxy map (not surprising after that kind of outrage) but the stupid and vertigo-inducing camera turns and pans are still there.

Btw I preferred my own more abstract interpretation of the Scourge as the Chaos to the Remnant's Order. Now they look even more mundane. As if the mystery and awe didn't already evaporate after about the second vault because they're all the same thing with slightly different puzzles!

Nexus

What?! I don't get to actually play with Drack, Kesh and Vorn?! What's the point then?

Keri where are you? I can hear your voice but it's coming from nowhere.

Oh my god I can see Kandros's purple tongue through the hole between his jaws(?)

Tempest

Well at least I could get Gil a date!

Am I like... supposed to give a shit about Jaal? I mean Ryder is getting all emotional no matter what I choose and I'm sitting here like "idc". And I don't want to bash such a nice person, it feels mean to dislike someone for doing nothing wrong, but that's the problem, he's so bland. From the promotional videos I assumed that Peebee would be the irritating designated best friend/love interest like Liara, but it's mostly Jaal.

Tempest again -- after a week-long break

Why couldn't Bioware add a "take all rewards" button? Why do I have to spend 10 minutes clicking “space”?

Ah yes, Bioware's trademark mashing naked dolls together! When Peebee's eyes flashed black it was pretty creepy.

Movie Night requires one more step... After the main mission, then.

Great, another galaxy map fetch quest -_-

Yoo finally the point of no return!

The final mission

Fine, I'll take you Jaal for plot relevance, though I'll probably miss Cora's Shield Boost...

Playing as my twin is cool, but why is he underpowered? Trying to kill a single mook with no powers and that tiny pistol was torture...

Where's Peebee? On the bridge?

Why open the equipment screen but not let me change the squad? It made sense to take the Science Team PB&J to the Meridian, but not to take back an ark! It makes no sense! I'm on my ship with everyone, but can't choose a new team?

Ah, so it was a romantic goodbye with the LI, and I didn't have to choose the "schmaltzy" version to make it more personal? Damn.

Ughh, so much lag... It's not fun to fight when fps falls below 10 sometimes.

The final fight is so badly designed. Apparently I have to hold ground at the quest marker position, but it's not explained clearly, and the circle doesn't appear until you're almost done. I jumped into the abyss several times because the quest marker was hanging over it.

Ah yes, Meridian, home for the humanity. Despite the fact it was clearly built for the Angara... Ugh!!

I don't get it. We're selecting a representative of whom? The entire cluster? The Nexus? It's bullshit.

Oh, this wheel is confusing. So each candidate is assigned to a "tone", when I first click it it's a question, if I click for the second time it confirms the selection. 

Hmm, my first choice was the Moshae, but maybe Morda?

Went with the Moshae. Thankfully, Ryder said exactly what I wanted to say! Haha, Addison: "That's the point, you colonial wad"

This human woman got a name from Quarian godparents?? That's a thing? Okay.

I don't understand how Ryder could use the Remnant without SAM. Has SAM changed her brain enough that it's now superhuman even without SAM's active involvement?

Oooh, interesting email. I haven't thought of angaran reincarnation as a designed feature to carry extra information in DNA. So they can be genetic hard drives -- again, like the kett? This has got to mean something. And angara "remembering" how to use the Meridian, or being sleeper agents? I demand a big storyline in the sequel about this!

Um. Using the Remnant involves not just a connection, but moving your consciousness into them? Okaaaay. That doesn't sound ominous at all. This entire terminal is like a sequel teaser...

Yeah Jaal, I can't stop joking because everyone is being so sugary sweet and I can't bear it anymore

The Moshae doesn't sound too excited about her new job... :(

The Quarian-Volus-Elcor-Hanar arc! Yoo! Sequel or DLC?

"Seeing you in cahoots makes me all misty" I don't know which is worse, the line itself or the delivery...

Aw, the science team are all in the same lab! ...With the dancers. What?

Tempest

Peebee sent an email saying she wants to explore the galaxy "with or without me". Aw.

Okay, I'm tired, let's leave The World is Waiting and Movie Night for tomorrow.

Watched alternate dialogue choices on Youtube.

I chose the casual option to rally the fleet, but logical is good too. But I think that after watching her brother being kidnapped and tortured, Ryder doesn't have the patience to be inspirational...

The emotional option as you walk out victorious is addressed to your LI! And Peebee's reply made me laugh and clap: "And now they all know you're mine!" And they walk away hand in hand. Aw.

Can’t find logical and professional options for the goodbye with Peebee before the final mission :( Not a fan of emotional and casual.

Oh. I thought Habitat-7 would have something more than one cutscene...

My edition of the Movie Night glitch: Ryder was simply invisible. Peebee was embracing thin air. So much for romance.

The funniest thing, tbh, was that Ryder leveled up when the scene ended.

Aaaaand now I'm free! 92%, 97,5 hours. I still have some sidequests to do, but let's leave them until later.