#Bruce spent the entire time in such regret that he asked Clark to listen in for the entire night he KNOWS the little shit told Diana

[marauderundercover]

Taking Chances Ch. 21: Apologies (Father’s Day)

AO3

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Marinette purses her lips as she looks at the neatly wrapped package in her hand. She knew she should still give it to her dad, shouldn’t let her hurt over the Gala stop her from celebrating Father’s Day with him for the first time. She’d already gotten confirmation from her Maman that her present for her Papa had arrived. So that was taken care of. A small part of her, the petty part, wanted to use Kaalki and go back to Paris for Father’s Day. But she also didn’t want to hurt her dad, no matter how much he’d hurt her. She had to be better than that, she is Ladybug after all. Sighing, she drops the present onto her bed. Grabbing the rest of what she needed for a movie night at one of Jason’s safe houses, she rushes out of her room. She knew that her dad’s conversation with Superman in the Batcave wouldn’t last too long, and then he’d be looking for her and Damian to lecture the hell out of them. Unfortunately for him, neither of them planned to be around to listen to it. 

“Got everything Pixie Pop?” Jason asks as she rushes down the last of the steps, barely stopping herself from falling. She quickly balances herself and shoots her brother a small grin. 

“Yup. Let’s go before I can get grounded.” She says, rushing past him and out the door, grinning as she hears his loud cackles behind her. It will get better. She’d talk to her dad eventually, and shove the bad feelings away. But she was going to let herself mope for another day. After all, letting herself feel negative emotions was part of the reason her parents agreed to let her stay in Gotham for the summer. 

---

“What do you mean there’s an entire movie about you and Cat boy?” Jason asks, shoving another cookie in his mouth. Marinette shrugs. 

“I mean we have a movie. It’s not my favorite, it’s kind of ridiculous. None of it is accurate. Except, Adrien did voice Chat Noir for the movie...still not sure why he thought that was a good idea.” She says, thinking back to the original premiere of the movie and all of the drama that came with it. 

“Well shit. He’s not the brightest kid, is he?” Jason asks with a snort. Marinette opens her mouth to argue, then remembers some of Adrien’s….less brilliant moments. Okay, so maybe he’s not perfect.

“Ya know, we were once cast as Ladybug and Chat Noir in a music video.” She says, snorting at the look on Jason’s face. 

“You’ve gotta be kidding. Really? Kid, please tell me you didn’t go through with it.” He says, looking mildly distressed. Marinette just rolls her eyes. 

“No, we didn’t. The concept for the video changed and so no more hero costumes. I was terrified though. Kept losing the mask on purpose ‘cause I was convinced the mask would be what gave it away.” She admits with a small laugh. 

“Ya know, that’s almost as bad as the time that someone at WE thought it’d be a good idea to enter B in a Batman look alike contest. Sent in his photo and everything.” Jason says with a snort. Marinette’s jaw drops.

“Wait, really?” She asks. He nods. 

“Yup. But that’s not the best part.” He says. Her eyebrows furrowed together. What could possibly be better- Oh. No, oh my-

“He lost, didn’t he!” She cheers, laughing at Jason’s huge smile. 

“Of course he did! You didn’t really think Brucie Wayne could ever be THE Batman, did you?” He asks with a smirk. 

“Who entered him?” Marinette asks, kind of assuming that Jason did it with Tim’s computer. 

“No one could ever prove anything, but Lucius Fox couldn’t stop smiling for weeks after it happened.” Jason says. 

“No way, Lucius Fox? Oh my god!” She starts laughing again, the negative feelings from earlier almost completely gone. Disappeared. Times like these, she was beyond relieved that she wasn’t an only child anymore. She doesn’t know how she’d ever function again without her brothers and Cass. 

---

Bruce takes a deep breath before knocking on Marinette’s door. He’d spent some time talking to Clark in an attempt to calm down. He still couldn’t believe his two youngest children had gone to the Watchtower without permission...well, he could believe that Damian went. But not Marinette. And then there was her attitude towards him at the Tower. Her posture was very Damian, but her words and tone were very much Jason. He couldn’t decide if he was glad that they were bonding, or frustrated with the way his sons were corrupting his daughter. Not hearing an answer on the other side of the door, he knocks again. 

“If?” He says. Alfred nods. 

“Marinette, I know you’re angry, but shutting yourself away in your room is not the answer. I’ll give you ten more minutes, but then we need to talk about your behavior today.” He says, nodding to himself. That sounded good. That was right, right?

“I’m certain that wouldn’t work on Miss Marinette even if she was in her room, Master Bruce.” Alfred says, giving him an unimpressed look. Bruce’s eye twitches. 

“Indeed, sir. It seems that Miss Marinette will not be sleeping at the manor tonight.” He says, turning to walk away. 

“And I’m assuming you know where she is?” Bruce says, doubting that Alfred will actually give up her location. He’d definitely been picking the kids’ side the last two weeks or so. It was different, and he wasn’t fond of the change. 

“Of course I do, sir.” Alfred says, raising an eyebrow in a silent challenge. 

“Will you tell me where she is?” He asks, trying hard not to huff when Alfred shakes his head. 

“Of course not, sir.” He says before walking away. Right. So she wasn’t sleeping at the manor, but she was safe. If she wasn’t, Alfred would have told him where she was. He mentally runs through a list of possible places she could be. Dick’s apartment, one of Jason’s safe houses, the Siren’s apartment, Paris- He pales as he realizes that she could definitely be in Paris. Was she really so upset that she would go back to Paris? Would she ever come back if she left? He lets out an uneven breath. He messed up. He messed up and now she was going to go back to Paris and she’d never talk to him again. Unless- maybe she didn’t. Swallowing the guilt that appears at the thought, he pushes her door open. If she had left for Paris, she would’ve taken everything with her. The sight of her clothes and sewing supplies still scattered around the room makes him breathe a sigh of relief. She hadn’t left Not yet. He’s about to walk out when an envelope on her bed catches his eye. Frowning, he walks over and picks it up, ‘Dad’ written on it in neat cursive. Now standing by her bed, he realizes there’s also a neatly wrapped package (Batman wrapping paper) on it. He smiles, then glances back at the envelope. He opens it, smiling at the art on the cardstock. It was clearly Marinette’s art, but he was confused why it was addressed to him. 

‘Dad, I just wanted to let you know that I’m so happy you’re my Dad, and I’m so glad that I got to meet you. Finding out that I was adopted was a little scary, but you’ve made sure I’ve been okay through it all. Happy Father’s Day! Love, Marinette’

Bruce blinks. She was scared. If he had to guess, she was most likely scared that the family wouldn’t accept her. They’d been getting along so well, until the Gala mistake. Until he’d decided for her. Assumed she wouldn’t want to go to the Gala. And now she didn’t even want to stay at the manor tonight, and she was angry enough earlier to throw a chair at him. He pushes a hand through his hair, cursing lowly under his breath. He had to fix this. 

---

A sharp pounding at the door makes Jason leap off the couch. He holds up a finger and gestures for Marinette to hide. No one should be here. No one else knows which of his safe houses he was at today. Grabbing a gun, he walks over, glancing through the peephole. He scoffs. 

“Get the fuck outta here Bruce.” He calls through the door, watching Marinette as she immediately tenses as if she’s gonna run. He shakes his head at her. She didn’t have to run, he sure as hell wouldn’t open the door if she didn’t want him to. 

“Jason, open the door. I need to talk to Marinette.” Bruce calls, Jason snorts. 

“Yeah, not gonna happen B.” He says. 

“I would like to apologize to her.” Bruce says. Jason blinks. That’s new. Did the old man finally figure out that fuck ups warrant apologies? He glances over at Marinette, raising an eyebrow. It was her call. The unsure look on her face almost makes him decide for her. Almost. The kid’d had enough of people deciding shit for her. 

“Let him in.” She says. He opens the door, glaring at the man. 

“Is it okay if he comes in?” She whispers, and Jason nods.

“Up to you kiddo.” He whispers back. She stands taller, pushing her shoulders back before nodding. 

“She’s the one who let you in. Don’t fuck this up.” He warns before stepping aside and letting Bruce walk in.

“Marinette.” He says, nodding at her. Jason groans. Yeah, B was totally gonna fuck this up. 

“Father.” She says, shifting so that her arms are crossed, a neutral expression on her face. God, he really hopes her mimicking Demon Spawn is just a phase. 

“I would like to preface this conversation by letting you know I went into your room.” Bruce says. Marinette just raises an eyebrow. Yeah, Jason wasn’t seeing the connection either. “I apologize for invading your privacy like that, Damian has definitely reminded me several times that your personal rooms are not to be messed with. However, when Alfred let me know you weren’t sleeping at the manor tonight, I was worried that perhaps you had gone back to Paris.” 

“I wouldn’t have gone back without telling you. Well, other than akuma attacks. Do you really think I’d do something like that?” She asks, frowning. 

“I know that I’ve done things I’m not proud of when hurt. Things that I came to regret. And I saw earlier today how hurt you actually are. I didn’t realize-” He pauses. “I also read the card that was on your bed.”

“What! No, that was- that was for Father’s Day.” She says with a sigh. 

“I didn’t open the gift. I originally thought the envelope would have a note from you on where you had gone. Or that you never wanted to see me again. I thought the chances were pretty even.” He says and Jason snorts. 

“Oh, okay. Wait, why would you ever think that? Yes, I was hurt. I still am hurt, if I’m being honest. But I don’t want to cut you out of my life.” She says, shaking her head. 

“Nor do I want you out of ours.” Bruce says. Marinette blinks. “I realize now what it must have looked like, to you. Not informing you about the Gala, taking the rest of the family. It was, admittedly, not my best moment. I made a decision for you when I should’ve asked you what you wanted. You could have even come with us as MDC, but I took that option away from you. I am very sorry, Marinette. I am glad that you’re my daughter, sweetheart.” He says and Jason blinks. Well shit. The old man did have feelings. Too bad no one would ever believe him if he tried to say something about it. He watches as the tension in Marinette’s body drops almost instantly before she runs over and launches herself at Bruce. She wraps her arms around him and Jason can see the way her body shakes. Bruce just stands there, staring down at the top of her head in shock. 

“You wrap your arms around her.” Jason snarks. Bruce blinks before listening, returning Marinette’s hug. Well, they were still dysfunctional as hell, but at least now he’d be able to take Pixie Pop to the manor without feeling like an asshole brother. 

---

Marinette bounces nervously in her seat as she watches her brothers hand her dad presents. She’s shocked when Jason hands over a small gift, knowing that the two’s relationship wasn’t….great. She leans forward in anticipation, watching and waiting to see what he’d picked out. 

“Thank you, Jason. Clark will never let me live this down.” Her dad says, the fondness in his tone not matching the frown on his face. He turns the box around and the room erupts in laughter. Somehow, Jason had found a company that made customizable bobbleheads. The body was probably just a stock body, dressed in civilian clothes with a superman suit peaking through the shirt. And the head, the head was hilarious. It was very obviously crafted to look like their dad, specifically with his ‘Brucie Wayne’ smile. It was awful and amazing at the same time. 

“I think Jaybird wins best gift.” Dick says with a grin. 

“Tt. Unlikely. The new katana that Cass and I gave him is obviously superior.” Damian says, crossing his arms. 

“I don’t know Damian, I still haven’t given him my present.” She points out, grinning at the slight frown on Damian’s face. 

“While I doubt your present could be better than mine, there is no doubt it will be better received than Todd’s.” Damian says. Marinette snorts at the look on Jason’s face. 

“Listen Demon Spawn, there’s this thing called humor. That’s what my gift had. I know you wouldn’t know anything about humor, so let me explain it to you.” He starts, and Marinette jumps in to cut him off before they can start arguing. It was Father’s Day, the least they could do is avoid fighting with each other for a couple more hours. 

“And this one’s from me.” She says, passing him the present wrapped in Batman wrapping paper. She grins as Tim and Dick both laugh, not having seen it before now. 

“I think Mari might win just ‘cause of the paper.” Tim admits, taking a large drink of his iced coffee that Marinette had picked up for him. She’d had to fight an akuma right before they started presents, so she’d stopped and got Tim coffee from the shop that he’d tried when they’d all been in Paris. She watches in anticipation as her dad carefully unwraps the box, opening it and pulling out the black suit jacket. He smiles at her. 

“Did you make this? It’s amazing.” He says, and her brothers nod in agreement (though Damian does so reluctantly). 

“Look at the inside of it.” She says, gesturing for him to unfold it. His eyebrow twitches, but he does as she says. She watches his face for the moment he spots it, and grins when his face drops into a wide smile. On the inside of the left side of the jacket, she’d added a breast pocket. It wasn’t really for anything though. Instead, it was so that she could embroider all of his children’s names in a way so that it would rest above his heart. The jacket also had tiny bat logos embroidered at the cuffs of the jacket. The thread was shiny and very dark so that it would barely show up against the black of the jacket. It had to be lit just right to see it, but as he tilted the jacket again, she knew he saw it. It had taken longer than suit jackets normally do for her, but it was because she knew that it had to be perfect. It was, after all, the first piece of clothing she’d made for her dad. 

“It’s perfect, Marinette.” He says softly, running a hand over the names. She lets out a sigh of relief before smiling at him. Things were still a little rough, but they were so much better than they’d been the night of the Gala. She was glad that she had stayed, that she hadn’t ran like she had so badly wanted to.

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Tag list: @maribat-bdbwm @vixen-uchiha @stainedglassm @liquid-luck-00 @jayjayspixiepop @jjmjjktth @trippingovermyfeet @mizzy-pop @queenz-z @thepaceperson @iloontjeboontje @waiting247 @laurcad123 @toodaloo-kangaroo @ritacrow-blog @deathssilentapproach-blog @kittenmywaythrulife @nerd-nowandforever @tazanna-blythe @jaybird-and-co @jumpingjoy82 @lady-bee-fechin

[batarangsoundsdumb]

hae interrogationes multae respondeant quia demens .

if you read this entire ask post you deserve a gold star and financial recompensation

Um, Obviously because when you’re adopted by a white guy you automatically become white duhhh

this is about this post lmao and yeah youre absolutely right, you have to hand your poc card in when you get adopted by a white guy.

Do you think Cass would listen to Yanni, the YouTube channel epic symphonic rock, or some other stuff? There's some cool mashups but idk if that's up your alley, I kinda feel like I'm pushing it with my weird taste of music by recommending an orchestra cover of metal, but i just love that sort of thing and mashups :P @harvestyourcherries 

i haven’t heard of that? but in my personal (correct) opinion steph listens to classical music, and then both modern and older, and then also stuff like black sabbath, iron maiden, but also hardrock and hardcore. i like the idea of cass just liking the most extreme screaming songs full of noise and then also listen to pachelbel’s 370th sonata yanno? THANK YOU for the rec tho

speaking of ur cass playlist hc...reminds of the time (yesterday) i found 2 playlists randomly on spotify from the same user. one was abt 3 hours of instrumental/classical "dark" & "nostalgic" music. the other almost 11 hours of nothing but hardcore bass/synth/electronic music. just an incredible tightrope act to put on in public. the synth one was also called like "psalms for synth sluts" which is Also incredible

tbh i LOVE synth SO MUCH like for no reason at all but then also cannot handle a poppy electronic beat lmao. but this seems like the kinda thing i’d do but just in one (1) playlist bc i just sort songs by vibe instead of genre? that’s how i end up with britney spears and billy ray cyrus in the same playlist. 

Oh, I want Kate Kane playlist next! It would be amazing if you could do one when you have time and will 🙏

how rude would it be of me to just say no? like sorry kate but idk you and also you seem way too keen on the us military for an institution that homophobically targeted you? (and also commits war crimes) but let’s unpack the fact that the institution that caused the death of your mom and sister and also got you blacklisted for being gay is still one you align with???

'yes i am' 'no you're not' 'yes i am' 'no you're not' 'yes i am' 'no you're not' 'yes i am' 'no you're not' 'yes i am' 'no you're not' 'yes i am' 'no you're not' --- when i tell you i fucking screamed LOL!!!!!!! i can imagine the cameraman not knowing if he should cut to commercial or keep it on these two weirdos fighting on stage (bruce definitely ruffled dick's hair/noogied him right?? 

about this post but yeah lmao. this cameraman just turns to like the audience to get a reaction and it’s just multiple moments of CLEAR shock.

you are the only funny person on this hellsite

how egotistical is it for me to say that i get this ask multiple times a month? bc it literally happens so often it’s hilarious to me.

Wish there was more john/Bruce content 😔😔😔 was so hungry I actually looked at canon media 😔😔😔 (Justice League Dark babeeeyyyyyy)

check out batman: damned for some mediocre content but at least it’s john/bruce (also very interesting story and stuff, just got very >:( over this weird part where harley quinn tried to r*pe bruce or something? it’s not for everyone)

dick grayson but he's nicki minaj

his anaconda don’t want none,,, unless...... 

Dick Grayson was never a cop, he played Marshall on Paw Patrol

you are SO right. also paw patrol is a fucking good show idc. that shit could’ve been the new steven universe on this hellsite.

https://www.instagram.com/p/CS1lI0bLI7-/?utm_medium=copy_link

...

why do people keep reposting my CONTENT. if you are not funny yourself don’t just grab shit off of tumblr and post it on insta,,, get a life. sidenote: should i start an insta and get all these ppl to take my content down that would be funny as hell.

Might I suggest for a Gotham City Meme: something about the true crime fandom thirsting for the rogues gallery

ok can i just say something slightly controversial?? no? i don’t find true crime ppl who are into criminals funny, that shits disturbing irl im not gonna bring that into my very chill universe.

i may have never seen a 'jason cleaning guns in sink' fic but i do know he WOULD

THANK YOU

bestie im sorry to say this to you but while you can, and people do wash their guns in the sink, that is a lot of lead in a very vital part of the kitchen.

people tend to do it in the bathtub.

WHY???? like damn why do you even have guns

i dont think i read many gun sink fics exactly but i have read lots of fics where jason cleanes his guns in the living room. usualy dissembles them and cleans them with a rag i think

lmao fair enough, like i think that’s a large part of what i remember as well.

if you say you've seen/read gun sink fics I believe you. I think those of us who didn't see them are lucky or maybe didn't search for fics by tags or something idk

i mean ive never sought them out but i HAVE seen them,, like definitely i know almost for certain.

saw your tags and I'm interested in Steph/Kara now. They would be the most chaotic couple <3

literally thoooo, i have a wip where they get together in a zombie apocalypse and like UGGGHhhh i am so in love with them.

I am the Breece anon. Thanks for the recommendation; am reading now. I’ve always been a hardcore Superman fan because I love my pure himbo farm boy. My logic is, if one Bruce is a Broose, then multiple Broose are a herd of Breece. And this is a hill upon which I will perish.

fair enough,,,, like moose, meese, goose, geese, bruce, breece. i get your logic and i stand by it as well. (glad you enjoyed the comic recs!!!!)

It's a beautiful day in Gotham, and you are a group of horrible Breece

OH my god dude lmao

there only being 42 fics on ao3 for tim and bernard is honestly so sad i need more

it’s like twice that now!!! we did it lads. (tho very sad that my fic isnt number one but like number 4 :((((  )

i'm too late you already did the poll lol but may i suggest bethy (bernard + timothy)

shit dude that wouldve been so fucking funnyyyyy. think ppl have just stuck to timber tho, tim/bernard kinda died down recently and i think it’s too bad, they’re a great couple and i love them.

Wait, hear me out

Bernothy @redlightofdawn

great recommendation (lmao this ask is from like a month ago) but very sorry to announce that NARDTH is the superior shipname

Wait, we know that bernard likes milfs (Tim's step-mom) but what about dilfs? gilfs?

Wait no, I regret sending that ask

these were two seperate asks and they’re HILARIOUS. in my personal opinion tho,,, milfs, gilfs, dilfs are just about vibes and bernard is just attracted to sexy ppl who may sometimes be milfs, dilfs, or EVEN gilfs.

crime in bludhaven would drop to half if nightwing had a boob window. in this essay i will-

WHERE’S THE ESSAY ANON, WHERE’S THE FUCKING ESSAY

Wait if Barbra and Tim r at opposite ends at all times what happened to Barbra once everyone’s Tim’s ever love before started dying lol

she won a lottery ticket and spent 2 weeks on a resort in the bahamas before returning home and finding out that the joker was arrested for tax evasion and then spent a month staying at her big tiddie goth girlfriend’s house before conner came back to life and she broke her pinkie playing table hockey.

Why is the opposite end thing so funny and compelling to me. Tim comes back from his depression quest for Bruce and Babs is now a literal god

lmao when tim loses his spleen barbara reaches nirvana.

Are you still taking music recs because I have three songs that remind me of Jason that I think you'd like

send to me or lose a toe

🌸 ⭐ put this star into the inbox of your favorite blogs. it’s time to spread positivity! ⭐🌸😋

thanks, i wont tho on account of i wont.

https://vm.tiktok.com/ZMduBy3Sr/

⬆️

This is the whole of Blüdhaven and everyone anywhere.

Nightwings ass alone saves more people in a calendar year and does more for so society than most heroes do their whole career.Also u are one of the funniest tumblr pages out there. The vibes are unmatched and the memes and tags ✨send me✨.Thank u and goodnight @julia-flow 

fanksss also lmao.

That's going to be a little bit difficult to explain, but

There's some music that you listen to and you think, "oh my gosh, I can perfectly imagine Dick Grayson singing this song, with the same voice as the singer because that voice matches with Dick Grayson"?

oh yeah totally lmao. i have a lot of songs that i think are just entirely dick grayson yanno? kind of all of my playlists have that vibe, but i really find bleachers to fit with dick? idk.

"Lois lane/Superman" fics this, "Lois lane/Clark Kent" fics that, (/lh) let's get into the real good stuff. Some people ship Lois, Clark, and Superman as a throuple. Most popular fic tag for sure

yes totally, i think they’d be absolutely killer on ao3 and clark gets so fucking embarassed about it.

I miss your post, hope you’re doing okay!!

haha this was like 2 months ago, but i was doing fine then too! just didn’t have a lot of inspiration in terms of content.

Doot doot!

noot noot

I’m confused. What did DC do now? Like with nightwing? And another sibling? Please spoil everything for me

lmao they gave him a secret sister plotline where they had his dad cheat on his mom with tony zucco’s wife, bc dick’s life wasn’t traumatic enough yet.

sorry but it's so funny that batman is called "the dark knight" when the gotham city baseball team is called the gotham knights. it'd be like if a vigilante was running around new york called like "the scary yankee"

lmaooo no. but like yankee comes from dutch names or something so wouldnt it be HILARIOUS if gotham knights came from like german names and bruce would be running around called the dark KLAUS UND NIEK @graysonnightwing 

(not a batcest shipper) it’s so funny to me that the responses are “i’m a batcest shipper because i can differentiate fiction from reality and and it doesn’t bother me personally, but i understand why you oils think it’s weird” to “i wish all batcest shippers a very fucking die”

yeah lmaoo. i personally basically flipped my entire stance around to ‘i dont care please leave me and everybody else alone’ bc i think there’s really no point in starting a moral dillema over some fucking fandom bullshit. Please just,,, go home,,, log off, find a nice forest to have a little walk in and remember that somewhere in history, somebody probably died in the place you’re standing. and you will also die someday, and somebody will have to look at your internet usage and see you fighting multiple people anonymously while being named ‘nightwingsbuttchin200186′ like... calm down, we’re all gonna die this is not the thing to worry about.

so since like "wards" don't really exist in modern society almost all the batkids are foster kids, right? i used to work in the system and imagine: monthly visits from social workers and guardian ad litems, bruce having to get permission to take the boys anywhere out of state, calling their social worker at like 8 a.m. like "yeah dick broke his arm again... a gymnastics accident this time...." their poor social worker. bruce send her a huge bouquet and box of chocolates every month to stay on her good side

i imagine the social worker just getting into the case like ‘yeah let’s get this kid a good guardian’ and then ending up having to work with 22 y/o bruce wayne and his 50 y/o dad. and so this social worker is like ‘okay we can work with this, this is the best home i can find’ and then like it ends up landing on its feet and then the kid gets adopted and then they get a call a year later like ‘uhm so hi, this kid tried to steal my tyres can i adopt him?’ and like 3 years later. ‘okay so basically, my neighbours’ kid imprinted on me and now they’re dead, can i keep him?’ two years later it’s like ‘okay so this assassin child-’

ever since I saw that one post of yours, the meme that's something like "I know that abba's backup dancer got me" with a picture of discowing, I've been haunted. Every once in a while I'll be minding my own business then the image of abba's backup dancer dick grayson aka nightwing aka discowing will flash in my mind and I'll be frozen in place. Today at work I was in the middle of folding clothes and suddenly once again discowing entered my mind and I suddenly lost the ability to see anything except He. Thank you.

wow. the IMPACT.

Braver than any US marine man props to you🤝

this shit is about the time i wrote an article on batcest, like man,,, the fact that i didn’t get cancelled is MIRACULOUS. also like,,, uh if anybody on here did gossip on me,, send screenshots i’d love to see it.

Hello, just wanted to say your article was great. Thank you for taking the time to provide an unbaised answer. It should provide people with nuances they couldn't possibly conjure on their own.

May I ask where your username originates from?

yes you may (also thanks!!!) i thought it up when i was trying to find an original username bc i didnt want to be called like ‘timdrakes something something’ or ‘jason todd something smoething’ or ‘dick grayson something something’ yanno? so i thought batarangs, they sound so dumb and that’s my username story... now it’s my whole entire brand lmao.

yno that bit in kick ass where red mist asks kick ass if he wants a hit of his blunt, was that the inspo for stoner tim

no? it’s bc i think stoners are hilarious and drugs are great. (dont do drugs tho) 

How would u feel if someone actually wore one of those bruce or ollie pride shirts u edited

fenomenal next question.

Dick as lil huddy and Jason as James gave me radiation poisoning and now I’m screaming crying throwing up so thx for that

(Rico suave as Tim is perfect tho literally no changes needed)

i was so funny for that shit wasn’t i??? lmao i loved those weird ass fancasts

You're doing the Lord's work by providing us with all these Gotham/Metropolis citizens memes, thank you for being so relentlessly funny @nellethiel-aranel

you’re welcome!! i really enjoy making memes, but getting validation for my content and my memes is REALLY nice.

Bruce is such a slut in your memes and honestly i love that for him @rhodey-rhudert-rhodes-main 

he’s that much of a slut irl too dw.

Bruce and Alfred have an emergency pride flag for the batkids. Oliver Queen printed an emergency "I love my gay son" t-shirt and as soon as Roy told him he was dating Jason, Oliver started wearing that shirt everyday and Roy always cringes when he sees it. Oliver also has an emergency "I love my lesbian daughter" shirt just in case for Cissie.

lmao YES i had a post like this bc like all of their kids/family members are so gayy

stop bringing back batfam fancasts it is not real it is not real it is not- 😀😀😀😀😀😀😀😀😀😀😀😀😀

oh yes it is my darling.

did discowing burn down the notredam because he hates the bees? @allulily

no he did it bc fuck the french.

im gonna beg for 1 thing and 1 thing only. please please please put physical by olivia newton john on dick's playlist

okay then beg. bc i wont. physical reminds me too much of glee and that hurts me mentally.

your playlist is sorely missing some Madonna. Specifically Into the Groove, Like a Prayer, and Vogue

i’m scared of madonna that’s why she’s not on there. she haunts me in my dreams.

suggestion: son of batman by aaron dews for dick’s playlist🤩

sorry, i listened to it and the vibe didn’t agree with me.

Hear me out, metropolis citizens sending rare pair fics of Clark Kent x Superman fics to Lois to edit

yes, absolutely hilarious. even more funny if they send like physical copies, no address attached and lois sends it back marked with red ink, SOMEHOW

Imagine all the smut Clark must of read editing the fics

clark reads smut confirmeeed

NOT LOIS READING SUPERBAT PORN AND EDITING IT A 2AM 

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

hc that alfred is a meta that boosts healing factor of the people around him. if the bats are injured as much as they seem to be they would be doing bat stuff MAYBE half the year. no one including alfred knows about this. whenever the kids move out they inexplicably dont recover from injuries as fast and feel better whenever they visit the manor they just chalk it up to homesickness. bruce just thinks he heals really fast. alfred thinks everyone doesnt take care of themselves properly @finchcollector

that’s actually such a great idea, but i think that alfred would find out and learn how to concentrate it better so he can help more people, bc he’s great and i love him.

One of your dickfast posts reminded me of that tweet that goes: 'so you've had sex how many times? Yeah technically that's not a bromance' lol that's dickwally or dickroy

literally tho. like that’s all of dick’s friendships. once it gets past a certain time dick is like ‘wow i wonder what it would be like to make out with wally, wally come make out with me’ and wally’s like ‘we’ve done this like 40 times, dick, you know what it’s like’ and dick is like ‘sorry are you complaining?’ and they just make out.

superfam and batfam associations??

-batman and superman

-dick/barabara and supergirl?

-conner and tim

-jon and damian

pls enlighten me I am confused

nope,,, uhm batman and superman, but dick and superman as well, and then conner and tim, jon and damian and steph + babs with supergirl

I came across a fic in which Wonder Woman calls Batman "Stella" (like Stellaluna, the children's book) and I can imagine the batkids hop on the trend and maybe copies of the book appear at random places (aka, everywhere Bruce frequents)

sorry can’t reciprocate that was the name of my high school chemistry teacher and it gives me nightmares to think about.

good human what are your pronouns?

wouldn’t you like to know?

I need me some gothamites preferring harley over joker memes

everyone prefers harley over joker youre just very fucked up if you dont

don't understand why people try to add like veteran policy to the batfamily

dick pulling out his veteran batfam member card so he can eat first: step aside, peasants

Do you know the song Simmer by Haley Williams? It (the first verse anyways) reminds me of Jason? It's about rage.

damn yeah i LOVE HAYLEY!!!! youre right thoo

Okay so I like listen to your stoner Tim Drake playlist 24/7 but would he listen to skegss? Also I keep adding songs mentally it’s killing me 😩✋🏼 Anyways,, I literally love and worship your playlist 😃🤞🏼 And uh yeah have a good day ✨

stoner tim drake playlist is lyfeeee. also dont know who skeggs is? i’m stupid? have a good day!!

All the Robins (and Batgirl) decide to trade costumes for one night just to fuck with Batman and all the villains in Gotham. @subspacecadet 

batman knows it’s them youknow but like,,, what does he call them? he’s like ‘red hood?’ and 3 people answer and he’s not about to compromise some identities so he’s just Pissed.

I aspire to treat cops the way my dad treats them. This man is a 45 year old Asian immigrant to the US and the treats them like his pets. He talks about them like unruly children. Sometimes he pays off local cops to shut up and stop acting racist. And usually it works. I don’t know why but I can see Oliver Queen doing this

vibes... and also yes? oliver queen handing a local cop a donut to shut the fuck up lmao. but yanno i commit enough crimes to not really want to ever see a cop ever, so they kinda scare the everloving fuck out of me.

seeing as tim hasn't aged in years, that means he was 17 at peak emo tumblr era. im back on my emo tim bullshit and im not letting it go

emo tim had a wattpad account send tweet

People seem to think that batman is so dark and serious when the rainbow batsuit is right there. He wore it with no shame.

dude the 60s were a DIFFERENT TIME

dick grew up in a circus, jason grew up on the streets, and tim was probably raised by the internet

all of them cuss every other word and you cannot tell me otherwise

bitch i KNOW but dc has to change to an 18+ rating if they want to sell comix with swear words in them so we gotta deal with imagining the swear words in ourselves

thoughts on teen titans and young justice

haven’t seen teen titans on account of havent seen it and young justice was LITERALLY my favourite thing ever, tho i do gotta admit it’s not at all similar to the young justice comics unfortunately. i really wouldve liked to see timmy bart kon cassie and cissie animated on tv!!

ew ew ew how to delete batcest shippers I genuinely digust them

log off tumblr?

Okay as poc who was called racist for calling an Italian pastabrain: in the batfam are Italians bit Damian just yells various insults about the others being Italian. Just him yelling “What are you doing you moronic spaghettihead!” At steph etc

huh? i meant real italians. homeboy is telling steph he hopes she chokes on her fucking garlic.

I think it's dumb as hell to pull the batman is the best fighter in the batfam argument because like it's just irresponsible of Bruce to let his kids fight when they couldn't possibly be on his league or something

fair enough, but also like who cares they could all kill you just sit down and take a beating.

lady shiva, thalia al ghul and Selina Kyle are all milfs @notanothertimburtonenthusiastugh 

unfortunately, i have to admit,,, you’re right

why tf didn't someone give joker a death sentence already? like he's a mass murderer...give him the electric chair treatment wtf

idk i think plenty of people would have tried to murder him already (boring answer is: he is a popular character so they can’t kill him off bc he brings in lots of money)

There’s no such thing as “ copaganda”.

all american media is propaganda. happy to clear this up for you

is it bad that I find lady shiva owa owa

no. find her as owa owa as you want.

aight I'm guessing the order of your favs in batfam:

1. tim

2. Steph

3. dick

4. Duke

5. the rest

you’re wrong but it’s cute that you tried, i generally don’t have favourites, but i have a special place in my heart for steph, tim, dick and cass. bc they were like my introduction to batfam. but damian, jason, duke, bruce, babs and alfred are NOT FORGOTTEN OR UNLOVED

oh my god i was literally just readily willing to believe that italians werent white ty for clarifying it was a joke im so dumb sdkvjskdfs

i mean some italians aren’t white? italian is a nationality as well as an ethnicity, so like ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

since I saw so many people doing headcanons about the nationalities of batboys, I see Dick as an Italian.

dont know if youre serious or not, but sure.

super random but

jason 🤝 damian

old english

lmao fair enough.

tim absolutely has 1 gay uncle and his parents shit talk said uncle all the time so after bruce adopts him he specifically reaches out to this uncle to be like "heyyyy just so you know you majorly influenced my life yes i know i havent seen you since i was 5 and at the family reunion yes i know you dont remember my name idc thank you im gay too" and then they never talk again.

yuppp lmao that’s definitely something that could happen. i can also consider tim having no family members, like none. until he does like a dna test and he realises he has like an aunt living barely 2 miles away from him who’s like some illegitimate child of his grandpa.

I dare you one of them sends clark superman/clark fic and clark corrects the shit out of it and then goes like ps his dick is not that big, just telling as someone who has seen it. internet either explodes or goes who tf did he not fuck at this point.

i think everybody would call clark a buzzkill and try to cancel him over that.

so you're telling me Tim Drake wouldn't buy Starbucks?

no. dunkin donuts all the way

One of my favorite things is imagining people finding out jason came back from the dead and being like "oh no does he have magic powers now?!?!?" and he just pulls out a gun and tries to shoot joker

now he doesn’t even have the gun :) lmao

my favorite batfamily fanfictions are the ones where they use their shitty codenames, unironically, in any context

bruce gets codename ‘ugh’ everytime. he hates it.

crazy that tim being a 17 y/o ceo and a stoner who does brand deals are all actual canon things written in detective comics comics and not made up for shits and giggles by you, tumblr user batarangsoundsdumb @rowdeyclown

SO CRAZY HUH?

batman au where everything is the same but his utility belt is bright pink

absolutely, but i raise you, his boots light up like sketchers when he kicks people.

unbeknownst to the superhero fandom writers in the dcuniverse, clark and BRUCE are one of the most prolific fanfic writers in the superhero rpf tag on ao3. clark writes the best lois x superman angst, full of unhappy endings and scenes that are a so detailed you'd think you were in the middle of a superhero beatdown. bruce made an ao3 account to fuel "the do the butts match" thing, and makes batman/bruce fics from time to time. he wrote a superbat fic as a joke but ended up making it REAL porny. @concrastinator

dude they’re WAY too busy for that. Oliver Queen and Hal Jordan on the other hand are the most prolific fanfic writers in the superhero rpf tag writing what is Mostly porn.

When the dining table topic gets to politics, Steph says "eat the rich" as the solution

bruce just silently takes away her fork and knife while she’s talking.

[ethelphantom]

perhaps the worst of timings and ideas (but I’ll still do it ‘cause I’ll do it with you)

Uh yeah I know this is day late but it’s still the prompt fill for day 22, wedding because well. It was meant to be a drabble but then seemed to decide that no, it wanted to be an actual, almost 3k oneshot. Maybe you’ll survive. The first almost 1,5k are just some people making Jon and Adrien’s life insufferable.

Ao3

______

So, perhaps they should have thought it through before all… this.

Whether that meant Marinette and Damian or Adrien and Jon, well, no one was sure.

If it was Marinette and Damian, then this would be about how much they regretted agreeing to help with the wedding, that they both promised to be the Best Woman and the Best Man of their respective best friends. The stress the organisation caused was endless, and that on top of their hero work and university was a lot to handle.

But, as it is, talking about how stressed someone is is rather boring, so no. Maybe we should talk about why Jon and Adrien regretted ever asking their best friends to do any of this instead. They should have just asked them to attend the wedding and perhaps do a short speech.

Not that they didn’t do the speeches anyway. Marinette simply didn’t make a short one and Damian, well, Jon was wishing he had explicitly told his best friend to just keep his mouth shut. To make matters worse, the two of them were doing the speech together, because how else.

“Dear everyone here, it’s certainly lovely to see you all here celebrating these two dumbasses who only took three years to ask each other out after mutual pining and our suffering. It’s certainly a little surprising that after seven years of telling them they actually like each other and goddamnit Adrien yes Jon is genuinely in love with you alright, now can you please propose to him so we’ll be done with your worries, we’re finally here at their wedding reception,” Marinette had said at the very beginning of their speech, earning groans from the happy just married couple and laughs from most of the audience. That, and a “moan all you want about how unfair this is, Adrien, but she’s right, we did have to suffer for years!” from Chloé, along with affirmative nods from Kagami who sat next to her.

Yeah, the only ones invited there who were from Paris were Chloé, Kagami, Marinette, Luka and Félix. Everyone else had at last announced out loud they weren’t friends a few years back, and neither Marinette or Adrien had looked back. Alya was definitely going to call them once she heard Lois Lane was at the wedding as well, but neither cared. It wasn’t like they were going to even answer to her.  

“I’m honoured Jon made the mistake of letting me speak at his and Adrien’s wedding,” was how Damian had started. At that point, Jon had already looked like he was ready to run away from his own wedding, or perhaps it would work better if he just threw Damian out.

Not that either of those actually happened.

“As my lovely girlfriend already said, we indeed had to spend years watching these two dance around each other before they even asked one another out. It took us less time to start dating, and we actually met through them — which reminds me, perhaps I should thank you, Jon. If you hadn’t tried to break through my window and hurt yourself at the process when you wanted to moan about how he brought his ‘cute girlfriend’ with him to the States, I might not have ever met the love of my life you at the time thought was dating her very much platonic best friend.”

Dick started laughing (“so that’s why little D asked us to replace his windows with something unbreakable while muttering something about idiot best friends from under his breath”) and couldn’t stop before Kagami threatened to drag him out by his ear to calm down. It was clear the happy couple wanted the Earth to swallow them alive, preferably right that second.

Then the two ended up giving yet another set of shovel talks to their respective best friends’ husbands, and perhaps the only reason they hadn’t been dragged off the stage and away from the microphones one and half minutes into it was probably the fact neither Jon or Adrien were capable of standing up from their embarrassment and both the Paris Crew and the Batfamily and Conner, Clark and Lois were having too much fun listening to it.

Well. If that wasn’t all, once they got out of the main hall they were using as the dining room, the wedding reception started to look more like a chaos than anything. Nothing bad happened, really, but it was bemusing and a little frustrating, the least to say.

One of the main halls was filled with fake rats, as a very confused Clark tried to explain to his son and son-in-law, and by saying “filled”, he really did mean filled — even Mar’i could only barely fit into the room what with all the stuffed toys in there. Dick was absolutely baffled as he dragged his baby brother (“I’m not your baby brother, you dick”, Jason had yelled as he was being pulled by his collar towards the toom) to help him empty the room.

There were supposed to be filled water glasses in the cafeteria area of the mansion ready to just be taken and drunk. Instead, over half of them were upside down — yet filled with water — along with a computer written note “Have fun cleaning up! Or, try to turn them around without spilling any water. Love you!”

Needless to say, the mess that followed was enormous. Adrien wanted to fling himself off a cliff or maybe a window, but Jon stopped him just in time.

Then there was the area just in front of most of the toilets. Filled with plastic cups full of water, all of them.

Adrien buried his head in his hands, resigning to his fate.

Once they did get to the toilets, some of the soaps were coated in dried clear nail polish. The only reason they figured it out was because Chloé was there and she was able to recognise it without missing a beat.

One of the smaller dining rooms was covered with rather embarrassing pictures of Adrien and Jon. Chloé, Luka, Dick and Tim were all immediately able to find some that they had taken in the past years. It threw Bruce completely off because then who was the culprit?

By then Jon was ready to follow Adrien to jump down from the highest room in the mansion.

Alfred sat them both down, gave them two glasses, a bottle of champagne and a box of chocolate and tissues.

Conner found out some of the caramel apples were replaced by caramel onions.

Neither Adrien or Jon were ever told about it to save them from more chaos.

No one knew who to blame for all of this.

By the time they got back to the main dining hall, two of the biggest tables were covered in post-it notes — and it seemed that all the leftover post-it notes had been attached to the windows lazily once the culprit got bored. Cass took one look at it before she turned around and simply left to breathe some fresh air, dragging Stephanie with her.

Turns out, that was rather impossible since all their jackets were taped to the ceiling — which was rather high up there — and only Kagami and Cass could really get them since everyone else that was a superhero or a vigilante had to play normal nothing-to-see-here to the few non-superheroes in the entire celebration.

And finally, in the very back cold room they found a gorgeous wedding cake — more beautiful and definitely bigger than any of them had ever seen — waiting, which Tim approached with high alert. It was suspicious as it was not supposed to be there, but well. It was a cake. Then again, considering everything else that had happened, it was still far too dangerous to go without being careful. There was a note attached to the wall next to it.

Sorry. Maybe this compensates for all the other stuff. No pranks this time, I swear. Just a delicious cake baked by yours truly. Your favourite flavours. Sorry again. We just needed a getaway plan. Love you, and Adrien, do not try to find us or you’ll find your apartment in less than perfect condition once you visit it again~

You two must be baffled by now, but I have to say I do not find myself too apologetic right now. You’ve caused us enough suffering in the past few years, this is merely a simple payback of equal value, is it not? Have a lovely rest of the evening, Jon. You may want to keep your husband from trying to race to wherever we may be in approximately ten seconds, and it would be preferable if you didn’t try to do so as well.

A beat.

Then, a confused whisper full of suspicion echoed in the dark room, “…where are Marinette and Damian?” It was soon followed by two loud, irritated and frustrated screams of “Marinette! Damian! Get back here!” which could be heard throughout the mansion they rented and the forest surrounding them.

⬷۵⤐

“Thanks Kaalki, here are some sugar cubes for you as thanks,” Marinette said smiling tiredly and yawned. Then her eyes landed on the flowers she had taken with her and she laughed.“I wonder how long it will take them before they realise I stole Adrien’s bouquet before he can throw it over his shoulder.”

Marinette leaned against her boyfriend and let him pick her up to carry her to the bedroom. It had been a stressful and tiring few weeks, and considering it was past midnight in Paris already, she decided that it was completely reasonable for them to go sleep already. Even if they had just spent the past two weeks in Gotham and Metropolis and her internal clock should correspond to theirs instead of Paris’.

They had first gone to The Seine to calm down and to breathe for a while. Damian had searched up the exact coordinates of their wanted location before simply taking the Miraculous from Marinette and transforming himself. There was no way he could have let his far too exhausted girlfriend to handle this — there was a good chance they’d end up in The Seine instead of next to it.

After that, Damian had transformed once more to take them to Adrien’s apartment, and the only reason they ended up in front of the building instead of inside it was because Marinette had insisted she wanted to open the door with the keys Adrien had given her the previous summer. Both could have bet he was regretting doing that more than anything right now, but that was fine.

Damian set her gently to the bed before helping her change into her pajamas so that they could just go to sleep. He had plans for the day that his best friend had almost ruined for him by deciding he wanted to get married the day before, and now that Damian had a chance to go through with his plans anyway, there was no way he was going to let his Angel exhaust herself even more. He needed her awake for the morning.

Once he was sure Marinette had fallen asleep, he took both their phones and simply turned them off, knowing that soon enough they would be blown up with messages and he would rather not have his Father or Drake to hack their phones to turn up the volume again. After all, there was a real chance they would do just that. Harder to do it to a phone that’s just simply off.

⬷۵⤐

“Good morning, habibti. I hope you slept well. I made breakfast, please dress and get to the kitchen,” Damian said, waking her up from her peaceful slumber. He kissed her forehead gently before turning around and leaving to give her some space.

Marinette buried her face to her pillow before smelling the amazing scent that came from the kitchen. Damnit. Now she really couldn’t just continue sleeping. Damn her boyfriend for being a sneaky bastard and making sure she wouldn’t be able to fall back asleep.

So, Marinette opened one of the luggage, not really caring which one of them owned it, and took the first sweater she could find and pulled it over her head. Then she stood up and walked to the kitchen, following the wonderful scent in favour of ignoring the need to brush her teeth.

“Good morning, mon tresor,” she said, leaning against the door frame and watched her dear boyfriend cook them something to eat. Once he turned around, he simply stopped in his tracks, staring at her. “What is it? Did I dress up in something dirty?”

Damian shook his head and smiled at her. “No, it’s not that. It’s just, I can’t believe you’re actually wearing my clothes,” he replied, taking a few strides across the room to get to her. He swept her up into his arms and squeezed her. “You’re too adorable for your own good,” he told her as blush crept to her cheeks.

When Damian finally returned her back to her feet, she pulled him down by his collar and pressed a kiss on his nose, only then letting him return to whatever it was he had been doing. Marinette rubbed her still sleepy eyes, yawning before she slumped on the chair closest to her. Burying her head to her arms, ready to fall asleep at the table again, she sighed happily as Damian reached out to comb her hair a little. It was nice and comforting. Well, up until he found a tangled area and had to use a little more force to untangle it. Marinette winced and stiffed, only relaxing when Damian kissed her head.

“I apologise, love. I did not mean to cause you pain,” he said, his hands never leaving her hair.

“It’s alright. Just, please, be more careful.”

“I will.”

Damian continued for a short while more before declaring he was done and went to get her a plate full of food. She sighed happily at the delicious smell of it all. Without thinking, Marinette put a forkful of the scrambled eggs in her mouth, only to then realise it was still hot. Damian laughed at her as he went to fetch her a glass of cold water.

As they ate, they talked about the previous day. Marinette wondered why she hadn’t gotten any messages from them — they should have realised she was a part of the scheming, unless they hadn’t found the cake — but then Damian told her it was because he had turned both their phones off. But, perhaps there weren’t that many messages from everyone waiting for them. Hopefully, anyway.

“Isn’t this our third anniversary already?” Marinette suddenly asked. Damian nodded.

“Yes. Isn’t it strange how time flies?”

“Yep, definitely. Especially since it feels like we’ve been together forever. I honestly cannot get over how a few years back I wanted to learn your name and now I’m having breakfast with you in your sweater,” Marinette said chuckling and leaned against her palm. She watched how he stared at her before digging something from his pocket.

Damian walked around to her and cleared his throat. “I understand the sentiment,” he said, playing with a strand of her hair. “Personally, I can not believe how miraculous it is I got the first date and even the first year, let alone these wonderful three years I’ve now had with you.”

Then he dropped on one knee and showed her what he had taken out of his pocket. A beautiful silver ring with a sapphire and a double halo. Marinette gasped and felt tears prickling in her eyes, all of the exhaustion gone from her. “So, Marinette Dupain-Cheng, habibti, my dearest angel, will you do me the honour and stay by my side until death do us part?”

“Yes! A thousand times yes!” she breathed out and launched herself at her boyfriend — fiancé? —, tackling him to the ground as she embraced him.

Damian returned the embrace, squeezing her tight against his chest as she kissed his forehead, hair, eyes, nose, anything she could easily reach.

Her fiancé had a horrible sense of timing, but that was fine with her. So what if they ended up getting engaged the day after their best friends got married? They would live.

A few hours later, they finally turned their phones on to tell their families of their engagement. As they had guessed, they had hundreds of notifications, both worried and frustrated messages. And about three hundred missed calls each. Oops?

If they had hoped telling them of their engagement would have helped them calm down, they were horribly wrong.

The messages that followed that absolutely flooded their phones.

Maybe the akumas could wait a little until Adrien was less done with her, and the villains in the states could wait until Jon was ready to face Damian without wanting to launch him directly at the sun and his family was ready to not start a screaming match about him proposing to her somewhere they could not see it happen.

Perhaps they should stay away from all of them for the next few days… or weeks.

Yeah, that sounded like a good idea.

__________

@ladysblackcat​ @daminett4life​ @tinyterror333​ @annabellabrookes​ @7-sage-7​ @theyellowfeverexperience​ @thethirdwheelfriend​ @lady-phoenix-of-tardis @kris-pines04​ @daminette-december2019​ @bluerosette23​

[fishfingersandjellybabies]

Not Again, Not Again, Not Again - fic

Characters: Tim Drake, Conner Kent, Damian Wayne, Jon Kent Pairing: jondami for sure, timkon maybe/could be platonic Summary: A Superboy has killed a Robin before. He wouldn’t let Jon kill Damian too. A/N: This whole thing is based on @guerrahilarante ’s caption on their art here, about not getting attached to superboys. Damian and Jon are like 17 and 15 respectively, Tim and Conner are in their 20s obvi. Dick probably knew all of this years ago, before Damian complained to him haha. Like I said, the TimKon here could be seen as romantic or platonic, it’s up to the reader. I hope this angers that anon who told me I’m not allowed to write about the Super family anymore. >:)

~~

From the second Tim met Jonathan Kent, he didn’t like him.

He didn’t like his overly positive attitude, didn’t like how babied he was by basically the entire hero community, but most of all – he didn’t like how much time he spent with Damian.

So he didn’t allow it.

If Jon called, he ‘accidentally’ lost the line. If the Supers were working a case near Gotham, Tim volunteered to work with Damian on a case out of town. If an out of town case wasn’t an option, then he chaperoned. Stayed close whether Damian and Jon wanted him there or not.

And he knew the moment it started to happen. Knew as the two grew into their teens that feelings were starting to be developed. A few extra, secret smiles. More unannounced visits, standing a little too close together.

And he started to hate Jonathan Kent even more.

He was subtle at first, but as the years went on, he became more and more obvious with his disgust. It didn’t bother Damian any – in fact it seemed to just fuel him to hang out with Jon more, just telling his friend, “Drake’s just a freak. I’m pretty used to it. Don’t let him bother you.”

And with anyone else, the hurt look in Jon’s eyes might have made Tim feel guilty or regretful, but here? Here it did nothing but annoy him, and cement why he was doing this in his mind.

Because no one else could see it. Not even Damian with all his training, but Jonathan Kent was a threat. Jonathan Kent was going to kill him.

And Tim wouldn’t let that happen. Not again. Not to Damian. Not to another Robin.

He also knew the moment Conner was told. Knew the moment Jon went crying to his own older brother about it. Could see the sad look in his best friend’s eyes whenever they saw each other. Whenever Tim lashed out at Jon by separating he and Damian while Conner was present.

Conner never asked. Maybe he already knew, or thought he did. Maybe he assumed it as a Bat thing. Maybe he thought Tim was doing it to upset Damian, and just using Jon as a tool.

Regardless, everyone tolerated it. Damian, Conner, Jon. Even Bruce and Clark – though they more avoided their children’s angst than tolerated it.

But yeah, everyone tolerated it – until they didn’t.

It was a morning in Titans Tower. A Titans case and one Tim and Conner were working turned out to be one in the same, so they all met up at the tower to compare notes.

They were in the computer room, just the four of them. Jon and Damian at the computer, looking for the files, Tim and Conner standing not far behind them. After a few minutes, Damian decided to go get some of their physical evidence, to which Jon disagreed. Damian snorted at him, and playfully, Jon grabbed his sleeve, dragging behind him while gently pulling him back.

And without thinking – Tim reached out, slapped Jon’s hand away with a grumbled, “Don’t touch him.”

Jon released his arm, and instead of looking hurt, just looked annoyed, narrowing his eyes at Tim. “Why not? Who said it was your choice?”

Damian had turned back towards them by now, face as blank as ever. He opened his mouth to respond, probably to tell Jon to calm down and not let it get to him, but he was too late in his attempt, as Tim spoke first. “It’s not my choice, I’m just not a huge fan of people accosting my brother.”

Jon’s face heated up as he turned towards Tim, balling his hands into fists. “I am not accosting hi-!”

Damian and Conner were between them in an instant, Damian shoving Jon against the computer banks, while Conner grabbed Tim’s shoulders and pushed him backwards.

“Okay, enough!” Conner shouted, even as Damian looked over his shoulder at them. “Tim, what the hell is your problem!”

“I don’t have one.” Tim defended coolly. “If anything, it’s your brother who has a problem. Needs to learn to keep his hands to himself.”

There was the sound of Jon lunging forward, and Damian stopping him.

“Loathe as I am to admit it, I agree with Conner.” Damian hummed, looking back once more. “You’ve appeared to have an issue with Superboy for years, it’s about time you explain yourself. And that idiocy you just spewed doesn’t cut it.”

Tim frowned, his heartbeat speeding up. “I don’t have a problem. In general or with Jon.” He shook himself free of Conner. “But if you all think I do and don’t want me here, then fine. I can take the hint.” He turned away, towards the door. “Conner can handle-”

“Tim, stop. You know none of us said that.” Conner whispered, hand slipping gently around Tim’s wrist. Tim froze at the contact immediately, feeling that familiar lump swelling in his throat. “Please, tell us what’s wrong.”

Tim swallowed, but the lump remained. He glanced over his shoulder. Saw concern melting off Conner’s features. Even Damian seemed worried, his head tilted in interest. Jon just watched eagerly.

“Please.” Conner repeated.

Fine. Fine.

“He’s gonna kill him.” Tim said softly. In his periphery he saw Jon’s eyes widen in surprise, Damian’s eyebrows scrunch in confusion. “Jon’s gonna kill Damian, and I can’t let that happen again. Not to someone else.”

“Again?” Conner asked, as Tim pulled his hand away, turned to face the other three completely. Jon was looking desperately at Damian, whispering frantically about how he’d never, he’d die first himself. Damian was waving him off, straining to listen to Tim. “Tim…what do you mean again? To someone else?”

“Superboy has killed Robin before.” Tim murmured. “And I won’t let a Superboy kill a Robin again.”

Pain flashed across Conner’s face. “Tim.” He breathed. “Tim, what are you talking about?”

“When you died, I…I was destroyed.” Tim explained quietly. His heart hurt, it hurt so bad. “It killed me, and I…I never recovered, not even when you came back.”

Conner just stared at him, absolutely devastated himself.

“Not even now.” Tim admitted. “God, Conner. You know I love you, but even now, all these years later, I look at you and all I can think about is the time when you were gone. When you were dead and I was alone and I…I couldn’t breathe. Not for years. And then I couldn’t cope when you came back. Because you came back and it was like nothing happened, and that all that pain and heartache and everything I went through was for absolutely shit. And with you back, everyone seemed better and everyone recovered, and I still couldn’t.”

No one said anything. Damian and Jon just looked at each other.

“And when I look at Jon and Damian, I…I just see the same damn thing happening.” Tim could feel tears in his eyes now, just thinking of the possibility. “Because they love each other. They’re in love with each other and it’s so obvious, and…and Damian’s already been hurt and wronged by so many people he loves. By his parents, by Dick, by me. And the idea that he’d let his guard down for Jon, for Jon to convince him that he loved him, and cared about him, only to up and die and leave him with nothing…”

Tim felt a tear fall, gasped in a breath.

“He’s my brother, Conner.” Tim sobbed. “He’s my brother, and it’s nothing against Jon. Really, it’s not. I just can’t let Damian get hurt again. Not in general and not like I was. I can’t let what happened to me happen to him.” A watery laugh. “I’m bad enough, you know?”

“Tim…” Conner tried. Suddenly he dragged Tim forward into his arms. “God, Tim, why didn’t you tell me?”

“Because it wasn’t actually your fault.” Tim chuckled again. But he accepted the embrace anyway. Returned it as tight as he could, buried his face in Conner’s chest. “And I didn’t want you to feel guilty about how fucked up I am.”

“But you could have at least let me help you.” Conner offered. “You didn’t have to go through all this alone. Especially since that’s exactly what you’re trying to save Damian from…”

“I promise, though.” Jon interjected from behind Conner. “I promise I won’t leave him, Tim. I won’t do what Conner did to you. I swear on my life-”

“But the problem is you can’t.” Tim closed his eyes, held Conner even closer. “You can’t promise that Jon, no matter how much you want to.”

“…Drake.” Damian whispered. Tim looked around Conner’s arm to see Damian and Jon had moved closer now. Damian was standing almost-protectively in front of Jon, but they both had a clear look of understanding and compassion on their faces. “I…appreciate your concern. And it…makes sense now, your actions over the years. Keeping Jonathan and I apart would save me the heartache of if he ever died while being stupidly heroic.”

Jon blinked, and slapped Damian’s arm in a display of mock offense.

“Same goes for you, idiot.” He mumbled, rolling his eyes and looking away.

“But I am…happy with him. And I don’t see the pain of losing him ever making me regret knowing him in the first place.” Damian glanced back at the other. Jon looked at him and grinned as bright as the sun, reaching out for Damian’s hand. Damian took it instantly, even as he turned back to Tim. “It didn’t with Father or Grayson. It didn’t with you.”

Tim tried to smile as he pulled away from Conner, and wrapped his arms around Damian instead. Knew it came out wrong. No one said anything though.

“I’m sorry.” He whispered into Damian’s hair. Felt Damian release Jon’s hand to hang onto him instead. “I’m so sorry, Damian.”

“An honest mistake.” Damian promised. “But…it is nice to know that should anything happen to him, I can probably count on you to help me through the aftermath.”

“Every day, for as long as you need me.” Tim agreed instantly. He looked at the other teenager. “And…and I will be for Jon, should he ever lose you himself. If he wanted me to be.”

Jon smiled, nodded silently, as if saying that all was forgiven. Tim nodded back to him too.

“I’m sorry, Jon. It really never was personal.” He tried. “Any way I can make it up to you?”

“Let me take Damian on a proper, not-secret, not-having-to-sneak-out-to-do-it date?” Jon laughed. “…Let us take care of you and your trauma, now that we know about it?”

“…Sure.” Tim hummed, even as Damian released him. “At least to the first thing. The second thing…”

“We’ll be doing whether you give us permission to or not.” Conner interjected, throwing his arm around Tim’s shoulders. “So, you’re going to have to deal with it.”

Tim smiled sadly, but nodded all the same.

“Great, so pizza and a bad movie marathon for all of us as a makeshift makeup for Jon and Tim.” Conner decided. “Just as soon as we put this case to bed.” He looked to Damian. “You said you had some other evidence?”

Damian nodded, relief of the conversation being over clear. “Jon and I will go get it.”

And with that, Damian and Jon disappeared through the door, leaving Tim and Conner to themselves.

“…I wish you would have told me.” Conner mentioned again, after a moment of silence. Tim carefully pulled himself from Conner, moving across the room.

“I still wish I hadn’t.” Tim sighed, slumping down in the computer chair nearby. “You know I hate…emotions and all that.”

“Ha, well, sorry to inform you, Red, but you’re human. Emotions are inevitable.” Conner laughed. “Though…maybe Damian and Jon aren’t the only ones in desperate need of a date.”

Tim ran his hand down his face. “Sorry, Con, but I’m not super into double dates. Especially not with my baby brother and a guy so obviously madly in puppy love with him.”

“Haha, oh god, no. I mean just you and me.” Conner explained. Tim heard Conner shift, and glanced over to see Conner crouching, leaning against the arm of Tim’s chair to look up at him. “So I can take care of you properly. The way you deserve. I know it won’t make up for all these past years, but…”

Tim felt his face heat up, even as Conner trailed off. “Yeah, okay.” He whispered, even as he heard Damian and Jon on their way back. “I…I think I’d like that.”

“Good.” Conner grinned as he stood back up, and left a gentle kiss on Tim’s forehead, even as the door slid open and Jon and Damian returned, bickering quietly amongst themselves. Conner smiled down at him, and Tim found himself returning it instantly. “Because I think I would too.”

Conner took Tim’s hand to help him out of the chair, and didn’t let go, even as Damian began speaking about the case once more.

(And later, when Jon took Damian’s hand as they walked their elders back to their plane, Tim, for once, didn’t scold him for it. And it felt nice, not to.

Especially when Damian smiled with an emotion he didn’t let others see very often. An emotion Tim hadn’t felt for a long time himself, but did now, as his brother was content, as Conner knew his secret, and chose to remain at his side.

Clear, unadulterated happiness.)