#But I literally can't do anything I just cry every time I open this episode.

[mimicha-arts]

Take my hand and don't you let it go now We'll find our way out

[hopeful-puffin]

Some 168/169 thoughts

Long post is long.

These chapter have consumed my mind for literally weeks now. And, now that they aren't fast-pass exclusives (and I'm no longer on vacation), I wanna talk a bit about them. First and foremost, as with all of my posts, I'm rambling. For another, I've had 3+ weeks of processing, so I'm trying to remember my initial feelings.

With that out of the way, off I go.

Just getting this out of the way first. I absolutely adore how Siren automatically lowers himself to be eye-level with Kappa. It's such a little detail but I love it all the same every time I reread 168.

Siren is understandably in a lot of shock here. But he quickly realizes this is Kappa as a child. It's not an act of prostration as much as it is being on the same level as Kappa physically. Rather than make Kappa literally look up to him, he's choosing to look at this from Kappa’s point-of-view. I'm sure I'm just looking too deeply into this, but I found it both very sweet and conscientious of him. Whether Siren acted intentionally or reflexively is something only he knows though.

I'll be honest; I was mostly okay until this exact moment. At this point I've had to accept that my spirit fictional character may very well be a himbo, shark mermaid. Like, I've felt this, I've just never put it into these words exactly. And, let me tell you, it f*cking hurt reading this part. I'm weird, and reading out-loud helps me solidify and remember lines in a story.

I didn't pick up this series to see the ugly sides of myself being reflected back at me. I thought this was just some silly, cute romp with some LGBTQ+ feesh. Now I'm addicted. Thanks, Obama Ms. Martin.

It took me reading this until I could do so without crying to realize what I think Kappa is trying to get at here. Siren’s biggest fear is failing those he treasures; from his people to his boyfriend. What gave Kappa the courage to share this tragic part of his own personal history with Siren is more than just feeling safe with him or wanting Siren to understand why he hates knives so much.

Kappa has been where Siren fears to go. He's failed and only points the finger of blame at himself. But he survived it. He "failed" and he's still "here." Kappa is trying to show Siren that it's safe for Siren to express his failings with Kappa. That Kappa wants to protect Siren just as Siren wants to protect Kappa. That, even if he perceives himself as failing, Siren is still "here."

Going off of that, Kappa is trying to get Siren to a accept his perceived failings and be open about them. Because it's the only way either of them are going to heal with their past mistakes. Kappa is wonderfully patience and sincere here that it just breaks my heart. He repeatedly reaches out for Siren, being a literal light in Siren's darkness. Darkness that has loomed over his head since the God's Mouth (which he even mentions).

I have to say, I've always been a fan of how Ms. Martin frames these sequences. It's like getting a little window into the souls of these characters and how they are processing their situation. Siren’s going from fighting back against the hand Kappa is extending to him, arguing that he of all people doesn't "deserve" this, to gradually (and painfully) talking himself into making himself vulnerable with Kappa in a way he likely never has with someone else. It's especially obvious in the presentation of Siren’s teeth. He goes from baring them in a clenched grimace to hiding them behind a wobbly, frightened frown. It's hard. You can tell Siren wants to do nearly anything but this. But it's Kappa. And Kappa would never hurt him. Something he argued against Susca way back in episode 35.

He's having to prove just how much he still believes this to be true.

Throwing back to episode 150, we get some hindsight in Kappa’s perspective. Why am I bringing this up now? Because it was all I could think about in this section of 169.

Because I can't help but wonder if that thought is going through Kappa’s head again at this exact moment. Kappa "hates" that Siren feels guilty. No longer "doesn't like," which is how Kappa refers to his scales; hates. So being confronted with Siren admitting to the guilt Kappa suggested has to killing Kappa here. So I'm not surprised at all that this is what finally gets Kappa to start crying alongside Siren.

This isn't even getting into all of the people Siren is apologizing to. Siren feels guilty for not being, "able to end it," because he's still alive. He wants to give up. He wants to feel useful, to "deserve" their love. But he doesn't and he doesn't want to keep fighting this fight. He's tired. He hates himself because Siren feels like all these people he cares about wouldn't have suffered had he just died.

These thoughts, spoken out loud, I think rekindle Kappa’s fear of losing Siren. A fear that I wouldn't be surprised has been at the forefront of Kappa’s mind off and on since Siren’s botched attempt at asking Kappa to fulfill the prophecy should they not have a solution once his time is up.

That last image in particular has been living rent-free in my head for 3 weeks now. And I'm so happy to finally have a screenshot of it. I've been fighting making it one of my phone wallpapers since the chapter was released from fast-pass.

Someone else has already mentioned it, but Siren’s shock likely partially stems from him reeling from his experience within the God's Mouth. Of the fake Kappa holding his face and claiming that he loves him. But I'm gonna go a little deeper in the comparison.

Fake Kappa is also asking Siren to stay with him. But where they are creepy and possessive, the real Kappa is soft and pleading.

The fake blames the others for Siren’s pain. The very same people Siren expresses guilt for not helping. The real Kappa says he doesn't care about any of that. That he loves Siren despite Siren seeing himself as weak or a failure.

The fake heavily implies that Siren should just give up. That his pain will end if he does so. The real Kappa begs Siren to keep trying. Because losing Siren is unthinkable.

I think this is why Siren hesitates before accepting what Kappa is telling him. Because last time the fake placed a hand on his fresh injury, implicating the pain it will undoubtedly further inflict upon him should he stay with it.

The real Kappa, by contrast, has his hand on Siren uninjured cheek while pleading with Siren to stay with him. Kappa wants Siren to heal by staying with him. It's such a wonderful mirroring that I keep finding myself pondering over and over again.

To the point that, once Siren gets over his shock that, despite his aforementioned apologies and feelings of being unworthy, here is someone who truly loves him despite all of that. Which Siren recognizes means this is the real Kappa.

The one who makes Siren:

Which is drastically different from:

I could on and on about this. Maybe I'll make a Part 2 since apparently Tumblr has a 30 image limit per post. I don't know. It will depend on if I feel like this adequately got my feelings off of my chest. Esoecially because I didn't get anywhere near to discussing the whole bonding with the others heart bit.

By the Surface, these two will be the death of me. OTL

[aberooski]

The School Duel

So today the rewatch hit the school duel, which for me and for my fellow Chazz stans is a very loaded 2 parter. There's so much I have to say about these episodes not even really so much because of the Duel itself because as we all know, despite years and years of watching ygo religiously, I still don't understand fucking anything about this game somehow. But it's the character stuff surrounding and interwoven into it.

I'll try to keep it brief because I've talked extensively about this several times on this blog over the years. But anyways, the important part is that the School Duel is a pivotal moment and a turning point for his character in many ways. The effects of this run through episode 35 as well but we'll get into that when the time comes.

The School Duel is where the other characters are confronted by the fact that the Chazz they knew, wasn't the real one. It's the facade his had to put up in order to satisfy the insane requirements his brothers are pressuring him to fulfill. He doesn't get a say in what he does up until this point, it's already decided. He's going to win this duel and work even harder to prove himself to them and become the head of the dueling world.

He has to.

They've already decided this for him, which is why they literally televise the event. Because they've already decided that he's going to win and since they've decided that, there's no way it won't happen. So why not? Show the world that the Princeton's are the best at everything in every way. And the pressure of all of this is too much for him, because let's not forget that they are grown ass adults doing what they do and they're forcing all of this insane pressure and expectation on a child. And before the duel Jaden catches him having a breakdown and crying in the bathroom. Then he goes and tells Syrus and Chumley before the duel that he's starting to understand Chazz and why he is the way that he is, because Jaden now understands that Chazz isn't coming from "an easy place". Which no, he truly isn't. And up until this point the only ones who knew that, were the Princeton brothers, and the audience.

But now Jaden knows it too. At least to a certain extent based on what he overheard.

But this opens a door because Jaden throughout the duel is trying to coax the real Chazz out, he's trying to get him to forget about his brothers for a second and just enjoy the duel. But he can't. Throughout the duel Chazz keeps looking to them, and getting angry like they're literally breathing down his neck all the way from the stands.

Jaden reads him like a book, he calls him out for dueling for his brothers. Because he largely still is, but at the same time, he's already made the decision to take back his autonomy from them by choosing not to use the cards they gave him, and therefore, whether he knows it or not he is also dueling for himself. It's episode 35 where we see that little act of rebellion allow him to truly duel for himself again. That's a discussion for another time, but that's the thing about the school duel that gets me, it's seeing Chazz for kinda the first time be able to, in the face of his brothers, do something for himself. To make his own choice and stand up to them even by just not using the cards they gave him. Because for once he wasn't playing on their terms.

But the thing is that up until now, Chazz's entire demeanor has changed around them. He closes off, he shrinks down, he shuts up. He sits there and quietly listens and does what he's told and that's not the real Chazz, we all know that. But Chazz doesn't even know the real Chazz anymore at this point, but his little romp and North Academy showed him a glimpse of himself, his true authentic self. And that gives him that little push to find the strength he needs to defy his brothers and not use all the rare cards they tried to give him and stuck with his own cards and North Academy's cards that he was given to represent the school. That is a major step and it's his first step in breaking free and finding his true self again.

And I wanna bring in the idea of Chazz up until now having his choices dictated by others, specifically his brothers. Because this is where that begins to change. Chazz does still want to and plans on winning this duel (which sadly he doesn't) but the thing is, while he is still trying to please them, he's not doing it for his brothers completely anymore. He's not even doing it for North Academy, he's doing it for himself even though he doesn't recognize that yet because he can't yet.

And when he does lose the duel, I just wanna say it sucks that he lost for one, because it's so monumental of an occasion for him. It's everything. But it also gives us honestly another formative experience for Chazz due to that loss, because we see Jaden and the others actually stand up for him. He's never had that before in his life, I guarantee it. And certainly not because anybody actually cared enough about him and valued him enough as a person to do so out of any genuine concern and care for him. He's only ever had people hanging around him to be a status symbol, because of his wealth and high social status. The moment he loses any of it everyone turns on him. When Jagger grabs him practically by the neck and while his brothers are abusing him in front of TWO entire schools it worries me to think what goes on behind closed doors when we see what they'll do in front of that many people without giving a shit, Chazz is genuinely shocked to see Jaden defending him, much less the others backing him up. And that hurts my heart a lot, it kills me even.

This is where another shift in Chazz happens and the door is opened for him to actually become their friend. Because they are opening the door first, they are showing him that they care and again I say, that's something he's never had before. It's a beautiful moment in the midst of what for Chazz honestly must feel like is the world caving in on him. Yet another thing and another victory that he's been denied, another humiliation, another reason for his brothers to hate him and to treat him even worse and make his entire situation that much more unbearable. And yet, in the midst of it all, there it is.

The reason Luke Hemmings' Comedown is in my Chazz playlist.

---

"All my life

I've been beatin' this horse

Breakin' these same old wishin' bones

Hopin' they'd bring me back to course

All my life

I've been passin' this blame

And once you get on, you won't ever get off

And won't be the same

Let it come down on me

Let me see all the things that I was supposed to see

Light up a darkness I was never meant to

Climb out of like a bursting sunrise from the deepest sleep

A change of heart and a silver linin' down on Camellia Street

Let it come down on me"

---

Because at the end of this duel, there's that light, that silver lining, another defining shift in Chazz's character and no doubt a core memory in his life and all it took was Jaden telling Jagger to let him go.

The School Duel is everything to me.

Anyway that's why Chazz should've won the School Duel, thank you, goodnight.

[phoenixremix69]

How I think SUF should have ended

Ok, now, I'm gonna have to do one thing right off the bat, homeworld bound no longer exists. For one, it doesn't really do anything besides showing what the diamonds are up to and it would break up the plot cohesion for the next point.

Instead of shattering Jasper and eventually corrupting, that final bumrush is their fusion dance and the worm Steven is their fusion. We've seen a bunch of times that the more toxic a relationship is, the crazier the fusion gets. A self-loathing Steven mixed with a gem who literally only knows toxicity would probably be 90% feral anyway.

And here's the most important part. While I am my monster becomes the penultimate episode, it gets a second part. While all the stuff is going on on the outside with monster steven and the gems like normal, we also get an entire episode inside Steven's gem. Jasper's there as a voice in his head as we get a gallery walkthrough of some of the biggest points of the show, all his biggest highs and lowest lows with Jasper commentary. And at the deepest corner of his mind, he sees her. Rose Quartz.

And the very first thing he does...is start punching her in the face. He just starts wailing on he while getting out everything he's wanted to scream at her for years now "YOU LEFT SPINEL IN THE GARDEN WAITING FOR YOU FOR MILLENIA! YOU LEFT BISMUTH FOR DEAD IN A BUBBLE AND LET EVERYONE THINK SHE DIED! YOU TOLD PEARL SHE WAS FREE AND KEPT HER SILENT ABOUT YOUR BS YEARS AFTER YOU DIED! YOU MADE AMETHYST THINK SHE WASN'T A GOOD ENOUGH QUARTZ WHEN YOU AREN'T A QUARTZ PERIOD! YOU MADE GARNET HATE HERSELF BECAUSE YOU MADE BEING HERSELF AN OBLIGATION INSTEAD OF A CHOICE! YOU LEFT dad alone. You left me alone, and I had to suffer all of the consequences."

And she doesn't say a word, doesn't try to defend herself, just takes it and cries. until he finally peters out and she says her first words to her son "I'm sorry. You 're absolutely right, and I can't be sorry enough about it. I was petty, and cruel, and every single thing I accused the other diamonds of. And you're right to hate me for that. But you shouldn't hate yourself for it. Steven, just you existing surpassed every one of my wildest dreams. Something good, coming from me? Ha! But all this, helping all these people, making all the friends, I couldn't even imagine doing half of the things you did. But right now, you aren't just hurting me, you're hurting yourself, and the people who love you."

"What?"

Rose waves a hand to open up a window to what's going on outside with worm steven wrecking everybody

"Steven, you have every right to hate me, and to keep hating me forever, stars know I deserve it. But I'm just a ghost now. You're real and your friends are real, and they love you, and I love you and you should love you. So please, for your own sake, learn to accept that love."

"Ok"

the world starts to fade away, with the last Steven sees of his mom is her crying, smiling, and making a heart with her hands

And the episodes sync up with the big group hug. From there it's pretty much the canon ending, but there's also a time jump montage of Steven getting better and going to therapy

[queseraone]

Alright, next question: we’ve done favorite Chenford episodes, but what are your 5 favorite non-Chenford episodes and/or storylines and/or multi-episode arcs?

I sort of answered this one here, but that was specifically about favourite non-Chenford episodes, so I'm going to answer this with a mix of episodes and storylines/arcs.

It's really, really hard for me to separate Chenford from The Rookie, because clearly they're my favourite part (shocking, I know). So there are certainly more I'd love to include in this list, but tried to exclude because while I love every part of them, I love the Chenford parts most of all. (Looking at you Standoff (1x09) and Plain Clothes Day (1x14) and about a dozen more....)

1. The Dark Side (2x10) and Day of Death (2x11) - Sorry not sorry, this is absolutely the top of the list. Yes, lots of Chenford, which we love, but as an overall arc it's phenomenal. Everything from the Lucy/Jackson/Nolan/Armstrong bar night to the Angela/Wesley parts to the perfect creepiness of Rosalind Dyer to (yes, duh) the Chenford of it all. And I'll rave about the acting and the scenery and the sound editing (the song choices, and of course the use of silence) until the end of time, because it's just so, so good. (I'm resisting the urge to add Now and Then (2x12) to this, because while it's still a part of the arc, it leans more heavily on the Chenford side... but I can't leave this without celebrating them continuing the story beyond just the little bubble of those two episodes. It's truly refreshing that they didn't gloss over Lucy's recovery and have everything just back to normal right away.)

2. Safety (2x07) - I yammered on a bit about this here, but I LOVE this episode, and Tim and Lucy don't interact in it at all. I don't think there's anything I dislike? Football Tim cold open ✅, Tim and Nyla and the challenge coins ✅, the beginning of the Lucy/Nyla duo of awesome (seriously, everything at the bomber's house) ✅, Angela being a sassy queen in her security gig ✅, and how Tim and Jackson's football storyline suddenly tied in with Angela's story ✅. One of my absolute faves!

3. Man of Honor (3x10), Triple Duty (3x13), and Threshold (3x14) - I'm specifically talking about Tim as Angela's man of honor. Their friendship is amazing, and seeing this all play out is so much fun. Tim bursting into the bridal shop ("you're going into labor?") is hilarious, and then him helping her find a dress?? Ugh my heart! THIS FRIENDSHIP!!! And then Tim and Nolan trying to reduce the guest list, and Tim and Jackson showing up with riot shields??? I love it all so much. (Doesn't hurt that it culminates with Tim in a tux *fans self*)

4. The Q Word (2x19), The Hunt (2x20), and Consequences (3x01) - I'll give credit where credit is due, I absolutely did not see the Armstrong twist coming. It all seems glaringly obvious now, but hindsight is 20/20. This is one of my favourite arcs. It was unexpected, a great Nolan/Harper team up, brought Rosalind back, and just really exciting to watch. (And while I don't hate Nolan like so many others, I do enjoy when he gets knocked off his pedestal a little bit and faces some real challenges.)

5. Greenlight (1x12) - PAIN. I miss Andersen so much, she was an absolute badass. I can't watch this without crying, and that alone speaks to the power of this episode.

Oh, and for shits and giggles, I'm also going to name my least favourite...

I hate, hate, hate that arsonist arc from early season 4. It was painfully obvious who the real killer was - literally the moment I saw him I was like "yup, there's your guy". It was just too much. It felt like a departure from the overall tone of the show, just way too dark, and yet somehow also leaned into a bit of a cartoonish depiction of a villain? The worst.

(Oh, and the double dose of shoving of The Rookie Feds down our throats backdoor pilot for The Rookie Feds is a close second... hated everything about it.)

Part of me wanted to add Under Siege (5x22) to the favorite arcs list, but since it's still ongoing, I will instead say I can't wait to see how to all plays out! Love seeing this team come together for each other!

[fellow-nerd]

Time to go crazy about the characterisation changes in the new atla cuz oh boy do I have thoughts

The main thing I noticed for all of them is that this show is focused about telling a story about a war torn world and how that affected everyone first and a coming of age hero story second, which is a choice considering the source material which balanced them both extremely well.it never had to be so heavy handed for the audience to get it but that also could be because it's a kids show at the end of the day 😅

Aang: where is my adventure loving kid. He just wants to ride the Elephant koi and show his new friends cool things. Yes, his past weighs heavy on him and expectations press down, but he's still just 12. It takes him time to work through his grief and his reluctance to save the world and that is literally his big arc. Learning to grow up and save the world (becoming THE avatar ya know). This Aang gets with the program quick and is only concerned with helping people and stepping up, like little dude ur telling me u don't want to go penguin sledding. I dunno it just feels so off. Love the stuff with gyatso too.

Katara: she's actually the most true to her og character I think. I just wish there was more focus on her like there was in the og. She was my first favorite charcter, put some respect on her name. It was criminal to give the opening to kyoshi, like girl u have ur own novels to be in! ALSO WHY DIDNT SHE BREAK THE ICEBERG!!! UGH SO MAD AT THAT.

Sokka: look I get it It's the year of lord 2024 misogyny has no place. So why don't we tell the story of how a guy learns that those views are wrong and how to change ur views rather than pretending that it never existing, like erasing it. As much as it can be critiqued Sokkas misogyny was the catalyst for Katara to hit the iceberg and free Aang. Narratively this gets them both invested in Aang and just shows Sokkas growth on every rewatch. They could've toned it down but it's a big part of his character growth and what are the gonna fill that with, if anything at all.

Suki: now her in live action I can get behind. She ate and left no crumbs. She put Sokka in his place and stole the episode for me. Also I loved the addition of her mom, honestly goals. Can't wait to see how they utilize her throughout she's the best. No comment.

Jet/freedom fighters: pretty much the same, I didn't love the condensing plot lines all into omashu tho

Teo/Sai: same as above but I loved the Way the two interacted it had so much depth.

Iroh: not sure how to feel. It feels wierd hearing iroh not voiced by Mako ya know. Like his dailougue was fine but it lacked that inflection Mako had which really Gave iroh all his character. It's big shoes to fill and it comes so close. I did die for the line where he says he's the one who owes Zuko. Like. Ugh. The implications of that. How Zuko made him wake up and gave him a reason to keep going. Its enough to make a girl cry.

Zuko: oh zuko, zuko, zuko, zuko. Again tough shoes to fill. I think that the characterisation is all there the challenge comes later on when we get his redemption arc. I do love the seeds they are planting especially in his relationship to Iroh.

Azula: now I called it as soon as I saw that girl, knew it was her who else could I have been. Just as evil, just as lustful for power, definitely in character for her to be doing what's she's doing this early on. Will definitely keep tabs on this one.

Bumi: now he about WRECKED ME ok. It was rough. I loved this recharacterisation. If ur gonna give us a war torn world, give me the war torn ruler, whose been carrying all that trauma and burden on his back for 100 years. Of course he's gonna be mad at Aang of course HES gonna BE MAD himself. So yeah it was rough to watch but because it was so hard hitting to see how war destroyed Bumis mindset, and then so wonderful to see Aang give his oldest friend a piece of himself back

In conclusion I care about Avatar way too much and will be ranting about this even more as I continue watching

[di-girls-dem-sugar]

Episode 39 of Find Us Alive just curbstomped me. Nah. Nah. Nah. Nahhh. No. This podcast is TOO good. I'm legitimately dumbstruck by how fucking good every aspect of this shit is.

I MUST start off by saying that Raddagher's scream will haunt me for the rest of my life. I don't know if it's just my love for this podcast or the talent of the creators but I tend to get very immersed in it and I could legitimately feel the desperation and despair and agony and fear and everything that everyone was feeling this episode. In particular I have not been able to get the image of Raddagher closing herself off and silently losing her mind over Love ever since the beginning of the aneurysm storyline. Whatever Harley talked about how she was acting and how difficult it was to communicate, I kept thinking the main reason that she doesn't say anything is because if she opens her mouth she's going to scream. And she fucking did. That was the scream of a grieving woman. It wasn't even fear or anything, it was a sound from a woman who's physically been cut open and had something ripped out of their body and I really feel like Ingrid thinks she's lost her already. Maybe I'm stupid and naive but I just refuse to believe that she's gone and I will not give up on the hope of her waking up because I don't know what I'll do if she doesn't.

And Lancaster? Every time I think about Orion I just get so sad! Not only thinking about what he's going through but thinking about how him being contained is affecting everyone else. From the fact that Harley lost his best friend to the fact that Beatrix tried to do everything she could to prevent them experimenting on him even if that meant he would have to say locked up for longer to the way Ingrid cried over him keeping secrets even before they knew he was a dash three.....

He misses his friends and he wants to make things right but they won't even give him a chance to see them!!! And now this whole thing with Love.... not only does he not know what's going on and he hasn't even gotten a chance to see her, but he doesn't even have anybody to support him in his worry over her. Even though Harley, klein, and Raddagher barely spoke to each other, the fact of the matter is they still had the option to do so but they were just avoiding each other. Lancaster never had a choice but to stay by himself. And all he wants is so desperately to see his friend because it might just be the last time!+ Even though she can't talk to him even though she's not even conscious he just wants to see his friend he's just so tired of it all and I want to cry because he really doesn't deserve this idc if he tried to kill Harley that was a different guy!!!!!!! It was an accident that wasn't him!!!!!

And Kline my beautiful wife, trying so hard to keep it all together... as bad as it is I kind of understand why she was so reluctant to see Love because who wants to see their best friend like that? like let's be real. Her apprehension was totally understandable but at the same time I wish we had gotten to see all of them in one room just for this. Still, I kind of like the fact that they didn't have that big group get together and the whole gang wasn't in one place because it's kind of more realistic that way... not to mention it's really consistent with Kline's characterization cuz she's a very avoidant type of person.

In conclusion @raddagher You Are Literally Killing Me.

[bengiyo]

I Told Sunset About You Rewatch Ep 3 Stray Thoughts

It's time for the tension episode. This is where things come to a head. Let's just go.

This boy really liked Oh-aew so much that it rewired his sense of smell. It's really incredible how much Billkin was willing to be unattractive in this show. This team understood that to be truly beautiful, there needs to be a little ugly.

I'm really glad they took time for us to see Teh thank Hoon for the plane ticket.

I forgot we started with Oh-aew in the tub. The girlies were not ready.

Of course Teh is up at 4 am for Oh, but he wouldn't get up for Tarn. That poor girl. Look at Tuty in the background watching this gay shit go down.

Teh asking Tarn to go off with his friends while they all watch silently from behind the screen is still one of the best scenes in the e fire show. Will also never get over PP making Billkin cry for accidentally hitting him too hard during the horseplay.

See, even Tarn knows that Teh is making exceptions for Oh he wouldn't make for her.

They just love letting Billkin play Teh being awkward. The cut to Oh falling behind Bas? Incredible. Bas always knew what was going on and was so powerless to do anything about it.

Teh is actively flirting and confusing everyone!

"I'll be with Bas, then," but looks directly at Teh? Both of these boys need to stop using Tarn and Bas as a way to one-up each other.

This going back and forth between them, Oh-aew? Heart wrenching.

Truly, how much money have PP and Billkin made from Lays because of this scene on the deck?

Poor Bas. Puts his heart out there and gets crushed. Oh knew what agreeing to that New Year's date would mean. At least be has enough class to let Bad down.

This couch scene is great because it almost feels like it could be from a multi-cam sitcom.

Hammock scene my beloved. Oh-aew is so brave. He breaks the subtext of all of their interactions and pushes Teh directly. Lets him know as they're literally on top of each other that Teh is the source of his confusion about Bas. He asks Teh the question in a way that doesn't let him deny it. Teh knows it's coming and pretends like he doesn't. "I think you know. You really don't? But I think you do. Or you really don't? But I do think you know?" Teh can't help but ask, "Since when?" And can only answer "I don't know." And admit his desire for closeness when Oh leans forward and pushes.

And now Skyline. It's out in the open now. They may not have moved much, but everything shifted.

Oh, Tarn. I need you and Bas to get a scene like Lennier and Vir in Babylon 5 where they commiserate about Delenn and Londo.

Oh shit Teh is wearing the shirt. It's about to go down.

I get it, Teh. Oh-aew is just so alluring. This man is on the floor inhaling the paper. Mess of his face. He is so gone.

Skyline really is undefeated. The amount of control Oh exerts over Teh with just his presence is just so incredible to watch even still three years later.

"Why do you have to think so hard about it? Forget about it. Do whatever you feel like. There's no need for an answer, if there's no answer." This is what I'm saying!! We get so caught up in the warring over labels. They're just tools to help us think about ourselves. Oh knows intrinsically that these two are drawn to each other and it's stronger than what he's ever felt for Bas. That feeling is what matters. He offers Teh the time and patience of "secret" to let him figure it out. You can see Teh instantly relax at that and try to fall back into the flirtatious studying they've been doing.

Man, what is it about Teh? If Teh tells him he can't quit, Oh always finds a way to dig deeper.

Jesus, Skyline remains undefeated.

"As promised." It gets me every time.

I tell ya. It's always queer boys and their moms.

I don't know what went wrong with the original translation scene or the final scene from this episode when they were in post, but what we got was so good from the reshoots that I legit never want to see the discarded takes.

I still can't believe they filmed this while surrounded by tourists. The translation scene is still my favorite confession in BL. Oh knew what was happening. He knows Teh is flirting through these Chinese lessons. It's absolutely incredible. It's just so much. Teh connected the series that helped him find his purpose to his feelings for Oh. Just omg.

That's right, Tuty! Regulate!! You can smell the sexual energy! Don't let nothing gay happen on your watch!!!

Notice that the leg touching begins as soon as Tuty leaves? She lost focus and now look at us.

Oh is so careful, he mentions being tired from walking before touching Teh's leg. He's giving Teh another way to ease in by framing it as normal help. But the score knows. Oh's hand on the inside of his thigh knows.

Oh's shirt literally says sunset, and Teh is wearing the branded shirt. They wanted us to know how this was really the climactic moment of the show. That's where his head is still at.

JFC Teh pushing Oh's face to say he's not ready for that. Look. I need to pause for this one. So many of my young encounters did not begin with or ever involve kissing. It's just too much. We can rub each other's legs and grope all night, but there's something about kissing when you're in the closet that makes it too much. Oh made it clear it's what he wanted, Teh couldn't give it to him, but they can still touch.

"What if there are two male protagonists?" I was holding my breath at this point in 2020.

It's the way Teh can't stop moving as he pulls Oh onto his chest. He just can't stop touching. The breathing gets heavy. We know where this is going. And then he stops at Oh's chest and the spell is broken.

The hot, bothered, and devastated look on Oh's face is the most impressive single expression I've seen in all of BL.

The silence at the end is deafening, and then we go into PP singing Skyline? I remember this week breaking us.

What an incredible episode. All of the games. All of the rituals. All of the safety valves. All of the blinders. All of it just to have Teh bail in the moment because he faced the physical reality that Oh wasn't a woman. He once again made Oh think he wasn't enough after pouring it on thick all episode. Goddamn.

[crepuscularqueens]

tysm for the tag @sambambucky <3 <3 <3

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

27

2. What’s your total AO3 word count?

193,604

3. What fandoms do you write for?

marvel (mostly sambucky but i've played around with other pairings), the magicians (penntin, queliot, wickoff), ofmd, and one black sails fic (despite that being my main fandom i guess lmao, it's so hard to write for because i can't make it better. i just have to make it worse. and boy do i have plans to make it Worse.) (also i do have an rnm fic, almost forgot about that! i would love to write more i just need the inspiration and motivation to hit at the same time lmao)

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

he kisses me softly to wake me up (by a wild amount, which i think was just luck of timing with that fandom blowing up overnight) flowers for the gentleman (first published sambucky fic. looking back on it it's like... cute but could be better. natasha is in it though) held by you (felled by you) (my fav of the ofmd fics i put up, personally) what you wanted (first of my tfatws series that accompanied the show. literally wrote each fic as the episodes came out, it was so fun and idk how tf i kept up with it) hear my name in your mouth and i'm done for (hahaha. yeah.)

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

i love responding to comments hehehe! bc i love getting responses when i comment on other author's fics idk it just feels so fun! and when you notice the same people commenting on your fics idk it's just. holding hands with all of you love you sm <3

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

omg uhhhh jinx i think mine also be a samsteve one lol. stuck in the bed where we lie bc i love writing angst but i usually resolve it? but they're my favorite tragedy forever.

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

hmmm i guess after it all calms down? resolution of my tfatws series

8. Do you get hate on fics?

not on anything that's still up teehee <3

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

it's mainly what i write haha oops

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?

crossover is when there are characters from two separate medias in one fic right? not like taking characters from one universe and putting them in the other? if it's the first then... no not anymore. no further questions.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

not that i know of (i'm not like... overly concerned by the idea)

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

someone once translated a teen wolf fic i wrote into russain

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

no, but i am open to the idea of collaborating like that (i've done events where i drew art to accompany a fic which was really fun and i miss that event a lot)

14. What’s your all time favorite ship?

i am so so bad at picking favorites, but if you want to go by what i have the most fics and wips for it would be sambucky

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

i want to finish shores begging for big moons so badly im so sorry to everyone because. it was so so fun to write! and i had this big grand plan and knew how it would all work out and then.... i hit a wall and now it's been years and i cry for her every day. i could save her! i could do it! but i also need to reread it bc i can't remember the details anymore lmao. it's a daunting task.

16. What are your writing strengths?

i think like... rhythm if that makes sense? like i get into a groove of this is what is happening, here are the beats, this is the action and this is the dialogue and it flows so nicely and has a good rhythm to it.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

focusing. i get distracted soooo easily, what is that all about haha. ha.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

i love seeing it in fic! i'm always scared to include it bc i don't want to mess anything up, so i usually have it from another character's POV and that they don't know what's being said. which is a cop out, i know. i should probably be better about looking into translations!

19. First fandom you wrote for?

harry potter (i know. there is no need to talk about it)

20. Favorite fic you’ve written?

how do i choose! tbh it's a tie between i bit the fruit and holy water. don't read into that.

absolute no pressure tags for @dr-lizortecho @unwholesome-gay @verdanthoney @nymhciv !

[cf56]

My thoughts on episode 10

SPOILERS for season 3, episode 10 of the Animaniacs reboot

So that's great. I took two hours to write this entire review, and then with one press of control + Z, it was completely gone. Great site Tumblr. Really works as intended.

I was in a better mood, but having to rewrite this ENTIRE thing sucks so badly. I try to give my genuine thoughts as I go, and it's impossible to replicate that on the second try. I want to scream. Why can't this week just go right?

So now you're getting a negative opening for what was a super positive review. I seriously want to punch a wall. A website meant for long posts doesn't have an editor designed for them. That's just great.

I can't rewrite that whole thing. Just have a collection of screenshots and some jumbled thoughts.

I'm sorry for Pinky and the Brain fans that their final showing was so short. I didn't like Brain talking about the "endlessly repetitive formulaic rebooted franchise that relies on just a handful of tired characters." You can say it's the writers taking a shot at themselves, but it really isn't. It's not their show. They didn't create the characters. Combined with the ending, it just feels a little disrespectful to the people who put their heart and soul into creating this show in the first place, and to the fans who genuinely love these characters.

Look at them being silly!

I can't gush enough about the song. Such cute animation, such powerful music!

I teared up while listening to it this time. I'll probably do the same on every future watch.

I liked that Wakko was right about everything and had the idea that saved the day. The Warners literally saved the world and they'll still be treated like garbage by everyone around them.

The Joe segment was funny, especially the zoom out at the end. I liked hearing "Waltzing Matilda" in the background.

Dot was so cute wanting to go on the teacups, just being infatuated with the idea of spinning around in a little teacup!

This segment is the epitome of "this is my life now."

Poor Wakko has the worst luck. The SAME CLOWN just happened to be at this carnival? At least we know he got down from Mars.

I thought it was weird to have two cataclysmic endings for the reboot six minutes apart from each other. Although they say this sketch was written for season 1, I find it really hard to believe that this wasn't originally meant to end the season/reboot, especially with Dot's quip at the end. I'm not sure I would want this to be the ending, though. It would have sucked if the Warners were the ones who explicitly ended their universe and killed everyone inside. That would have proven everyone right about their destructive nature all along.

I thought this was a refreshing segment. Slappy sounded and looked great. Like I expected, it was short and there was no Skippy, but I'm happy it exists. I was surprised and happy to see that they got Sherri Stoner to return for work on the reboot.

I liked how Everyday Safety was just a never-ending cascade of total nonsense.

The Council is not pleased.

I thought Wakko's bottle song was catchy. I liked that it actually sounded like Wakko blowing. I wonder if they got Jess to do that for real in the studio?

And the ending. I wrote four paragraphs about it, and it sucks so bad because I thought I made my points quite well. Let me try again.

I understand the metaphor with the abrupt and sudden ending. I know the asteroid is meant to represent Hulu. I just don't think they should have pushed their bitter disappointment with the show ending directly onto us. They should have thought it through a lot better.

If they were going to go doom and gloom, which they shouldn't have, they should've at least given the ending some emotional weight. How am I supposed to feel anything when the characters themselves don't show any reaction to their unexpected, oncoming violent deaths? I'm not saying it should have been super depressing with crying and begging. They just should have given a genuine reaction instead of doing business as usual. The closest set of siblings in the world is about to go out in a fiery blaze, and they're not even touching each other. They're just standing near each other awkwardly. Have them embrace and accept their death with a positive remark about how it was all worth it. That would at least give some closure.

What they should have done, if I could rewrite it from scratch, is give us a satisfying, happy ending. Show the Warners finally earning their freedom from the tower after 90 years. Maybe have them gaze at the sunset together, mirroring how the sun rose at the very beginning of the reboot. Even if they didn't have time to animate new scenery for something like that, anything would have been better for this. This ending just feels empty. It lacks any emotion besides pure shock and it feels like an F you to everyone who cares about the show. The creators might have intended that F you to feel like it was coming from Hulu, but Hulu didn't write this scene. The reboot writers did, and they had the power to leave us with something better. This could be the last Animaniacs we ever see.

I'm at least happy they attempted an ending. The original didn't have one at all. It just sucks that Animaniacs had to end unexpectedly and unsatisfyingly both times it's been suddenly cancelled. The reboot was supposed to fix that.

This was perhaps the most entertaining episode of the season for me. It has one of the greatest Animaniacs songs ever, maybe the best song of the season, I'm still not sure. I still love The Island of Dr. Warneau a lot, so I'm giving this episode a solid second place in my final ranking for the season.

Episode 6

Episode 10

Episode 3

Episode 9

Episode 7

Episode 4

Episode 2

Episode 1

Episode 5

Episode 8

That means that the majority of episodes this season are episodes I would consider really good. The top 4 are all episodes I would consider really great. I'll give my thoughts on the season as a whole in my collective season 3 review, but I'll need a few more days before I start writing that. I need some time to collect myself and reflect.

I'm sorry for how this review turned out. The first version felt a lot more positive, because in this attempt I just wanted to express my more well-developed thoughts, which happened to be criticisms. I liked this episode a lot. I just so desperately wish I hadn't lost that first version. It only adds to the most heavily conflicting mix of emotions I've ever felt in one week. I was feeling good, and now I'm knocked down again. I'm sorry to be the one putting so much negativity into the fandom. I want this to be a positive place for all. If I wasn't able to express my emotions here, though, I wouldn't be able to deal with them at all. So thanks to those that have been listening.

I encourage you to add to the discussion of this episode if you want. If you're from the future, please don't say anything about any of the episodes that come after this ;)

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[castle-dominion]

castle 6x16 room 147

the cult hypnosis episode liveblog

(side note I can't believe they didn't have dever & huertas-- heck I would have loved the OTHER dever to do an audio commentary. The castle's dad one had the audio instead which, like, valid ig.) Anyway I'm on a new dvd now, which is why I am complaining about the lack of (my preferred) bonus features.

Not QUITE the same mess lol

KABOOM I loove alexis sm <3 <3

Oof I'm quitting my job to go to school I can't imagine having a job & a non-job & a tutoring gig & paying a lease & holy crap I am so privileged

Yay calling him Sito.

were not was

Jane: He didn’t have to. Good looking guy, no bags, checking in for one night?

that's a flip phone... Plenty of people have their own website. too bad the guy doesn't have imbd tho

random lady yelling.

Love esposito's outfit! so chill!

You never get a confession this early in an ep. u KNOW smth's going to go down. Is there going to be another one really fast like this where they solve it hella fast & after the third murder with an instant confession they get suspicious?

Ah she has an alibi! Is she confessing to cover for someone else?

Love the doodle. Maybe it was a code to whoever is going to read her confession I love the flashbacks. While I'm here, the door opened on the left, attached on the right. I don't think it was like that in the crime scene. wdym you don't think so?

someone is making her confess to their crime that's why this stuff is happening.

Yeah that's how addiction is alright.

I loooove how she doesn't remember! Anita Miller: No, from me!

RC: What about forensics? Did CSU come up with anything? JE: Yeah, a hotel room in New York City? (he shudders) They found all kinds of fun stuff. (not clipping)

Clipping the theory part. unless there was a tall/cext to the phone you don't have!

Doc holloway's back!!!!

Ryan & me: Two weeks? Wait a minute, that’s how long Anita says she’s been feeling blurry.

RC: As much as I love a good mystery, a small part is hoping he can give us some clarity on what the hell is going on.

idk why I find the "ask for help" poster with the guy crying in their hands so humerous. Maybe bc it reminds me of the cotton eyed joe meme I made. Me: *just commit autosurgery trying to cut off my own breast* My surgical tape: *won't stick* Me: *crying* my adhd: IF IT WEREN'T FOR COTTON EYED JOE I'D BE MARRIED A LONG TIME AGO

Love background artists.

I need details.

I love love love the way it goes with the filming. POV filming. (markiplier moments, girl hand, man hand, we also need a black guy. Like that aone scene where you have three hands at some point bc you're picking up the artifact, swapping the teddy bear, holding his nose so he doesn't sneeze, & every single movement is a different person's hand. for Diversity. We need a left-handed person now tho.

Because he did what to you? aiy dee kay. Love the music sm KB, explaining like bonvolio: Yeah, you and Anita Miller are working together on this. You’re either covering for each other or you’re covering for someone else out there.

love how there are two interrogation rooms. She's very adamant that she did this. Why not take the out? "So I didn't kill him? I'm hella confused after all..."

Get doc holloway back here. RC: What if their lives intersect, just not in such a literal sense? Me, just participating in the fictional canadian character poll: ramona flowers? powers? renata? Hold on... scott pilgrim dreams is what I'm saying.

RC: (dryly) Really? Alternate universe? That’s how little you think of me? RC in a future episode: *goes to an au where lanie is preggo & rysposito is canon. unless that was just a fanfic i read...)

I love her ring KB: (off is look) I’m sorry, it’s just, you got excited. It’s kind of cute. RC: Yeah, yeah, yeah. You know how I like the weird stuff. Me: SEASON ONE

WHAT'S nothing? on your phone there?

I LOVE this kid, this absolute child. radar oreilly vibes off him, esp with castle's psychic link theoryu.

OUTSTANDING! LOVE THE WORDS! consistency bc of slaughter! "I need to confess!" 'take a number'

"She remembers bc she thought it looked suspicious" that's the only reason someone WOULD remember! & the only reason they'd take a pic.

a big bald man!

It's just a doodle. It is a celtic knot holy trinity sign, no? the van you've been disoriented. How long have you had that symbol in your head? KB: this is important! Dwight: *I killed a guy but fuck ok bestie*

Assertiveness training I love this tranny sm. He needs to get on testosterone.

Sometimes THEY scrub footage, sometimes it's the detectives...

her phone again. what is even going on with that?

I love it. love the way she picks up her jacket, the boys, she's coming back to work this late at night in an hour... I love these folks this family their dynamics their movements & body language I thouht it was jim not alexis. Peter's cafe/bistro

Her face. she is rolling her eyes & I love alexis & I love her bangs & I love alexis & the alexis-kate relationship kjsdflkjkldjfsd It IS pride! Ooh music!!

Love those two cops smiling in the elevator. IT implies that there was a conversation in there that we missed.

Me: native Esposito: also technically native EHI: *kills ppl in their "sweat lodge initiation"*

lmao SO culty he talks so slow. Need to speed this up. good gravy. Ooh I only just noticed her eyeliner. love it.

this place reminds me of japan. Why is he expecting? Oh maybe bc he killed the guy! ooOOooh! SHUT THE DOOR SHUT THE DOOR BY WHICH I MEAN NO DON'T SHUT THE DOOR YOU'RE GOING TO BE TRAPPED THIS IS MY PARANOIA KICKING IN.

Love the art of himself on the walls. Where is that? Sweden? years????

Bauer: I’m struck by the level of your hostility, Detective. It’s not healthy. RC: You know what I’m struck by is your total lack of curiosity as to why a homicide detective is asking about your employee. "little group" THOUSANDS of members across the globe! RC: Wow. That’s – amazing, how you would just know what off the top of your head. Bauer: I make a point of meeting every member of my EHI family. The people you mentioned are not among them. Me: thousands of members & you have met every one sure but u remember every one?

Bauer: *looks to the side offscreen* RC: *looks to the side too* *realizes* *rolls his eyes up* Me: I do the same thing when my brothers are standing behind me irl & annoying me so I whip around to face them...in minecraft

btw what is that glass thing on there?

grande poobah??? his what???

RC: So all three of our confessors have had problems in their lives. Alcoholism, anger management, assertiveness issues, all things that they could have gone to EHI to treat.

that's true! RC: Wipe memories. Think about it. The fogginess, the confusion over the last two weeks? KR: So you’re saying that a glorified self-help group can erase memories? How? Doc H: With drugs.

Me: *seen the s7 premier* Memories actually change all the time. Outstanding! Love the words! KR: Castle, do you have any idea how insane that sounds? I would clip that but meh RC: Just not in person. Me: Not your psychic theory again!

"Ok he did NOT flirt with me" (why does the woman's vers need to be flirty tho? /gen q for EHS or w/e their name was)

Just letting them continue to argue lol

KB: Yes, a genius at annoying me. (not clipping) RC: Yes, a genius at annoying me. KB: (aside) I’m starting to feel the urge.

the door opens the wrong way THE DOOR OPENS THE WRONG WAY THEY MENTIONED IT RIGHT AFTER MEEEE (tho I have seen it too) wait all these rooms have the same painting? srs?

the way ryan says "su'm" instead of something, I looove it. kinda hate it tho.

CSU: Detective, I traced the signal from Bauer’s video conference with Beckett. JE: So where in Stockholm is he? CSU: That’s the thing. The signal was routed through Stockholm, but it looks like it originated from a local IP address. JE: Local, as in Manhattan? CSU: As in inside this building.

Love esposito's giant coats & layers & stuff.

that hand is slim, but pretty masculine. He smiles but idk if it is flirtatious. None of the suspects said that the bathroom door was open. Why do they know his name tho? Two versions, one for women & another for men? You don't have one for left-handed ppl or someone who maybe can't use or doesn't have their right hand, for Black ppl, for any poc, for ppl who are women but don't want to smile flirtatiously with justin, for fat ppl...

Someone from the crew, yeah you do need a bunch more ppl than just justin, the suspects, & the head of ehi.

At least she pronounced her T. Oof the music. it's so good.

Aw dwight never got to confess slkdjfslkdfjl these three have become friends & I love it sm. Friendship forged in a situation like this.

KB: It’s okay, Castle. You know I like the weird ones. Me: YES YES SJDLFSJKDFLSJDKLFJDS THIS IS THE SERIES

KB: (slyly) How do you know what I do to you when you’re sleeping?

Alexis!!!

[cyarsk52-20]

14 Things Said During The 'Vanderpump Rules" Finale That Will Stay With Me For The Rest Of My Days, Including "You're Worth Nothing" Ariana looking Sandoval dead in the eye and whispering, "You're worth nothing. And I want you to feel that, deep in your soul. I want you to hear that. I regret ever loving you."

14 Things Said During The 'Vanderpump Rules" Finale That Will Stay With Me For The Rest Of My Days, Including "You're Worth Nothing"

BuzzFeed Staff

Have any of you recovered yet from the other night's Vanderpump Rules finale???? I woke up yesterday (and maybe today) just wanting to hug Ariana. You too?

Basically, the whole world has been counting down until this week's episode — Season 10, Episode 15, titled "#Scandoval" — to see what exactly happened in the Vanderpump Rules bubble when news broke that Tom Sandoval and Raquel Leviss were having a seventh-month-long affair.

If you're not up to date on what happened Wednesday night, here's a very helpful — and detailed — recap.

A lot went down, so I decided to do a fun little roundup of quotes from the finale that will live rent-free in my head FOREVER. Here are some of them.

1. In the opening scenes where Ariana was on her couch taking in the Scandoval news, she said to her friend about Tom, "He gives me the ick."

Producers knew what they were doing here because as Ariana said this line, cameras panned to Tom looking at himself in the mirror, truly giving EVERYONE the ick.

2. The now-famous scene where Tom asked Ariana if she wants anything and she casually turns to him and says, "For you to die."

3. During the emotional conversation between Ariana and Tom when she bravely told him off and she said, "'Selfish' is the nicest word you could use" when Tom said his and Raquel's actions were selfish.

4. During this same conversation when Tom said to Ariana, "You put pressure on me to stay in the relationship." I wanted to throw my TV right out the window when I heard this gaslighting.

5. TBH, Ariana was full of great one-liners during this intense conversation with Tom, so another favorite of mine is when she asked him, "Any last words before we never speak again?" MIC DROPPED.

6. Ariana looking Sandoval dead in the eye and whispering, "You're worth nothing. And I want you to feel that, deep in your soul. I want you to hear that. I regret ever loving you." YES, QUEEN. 👑

7. Fast-forward to when Tom Sandoval went over to Tom Schwartz's apartment and the two were digesting the affair. The conversation that took place between these two was on another level. Like, when Sandoval said to Schwartz, "I wanted to tell [Ariana] and every time I wanted to tell her, I got this vibe that she just did not want to fucking know." WHAT DOES THAT EVEN MEAN?

8. I can't stop thinking about when Schwartz said to Katie in the midst of a serious convo, "There's man-eating crocodiles in Florida right now." Is he OKAY?!

9. When James was on the phone with Raquel calling her out on her shit, I lost it when he said to her, "All the people you were building friendships with, you literally trashed it for Sandoval's little cocky cock.

10. James continued... "His stinky 40-year-old cock, like seriously Raquel?" JAMES KENNEDY FOR PRESIDENT. 👏

11. Okay, how about that very cringe, awkward scene when Sandoval went over to Raquel's apartment for them to hold each other and cry? 🙄 When talking about his family liking Raquel, he said "they love you" and Raquel responded by saying "I love you too."

12. It really got even worse when Sandoval replied, "I said 'They love you' but I love you too.” I almost FAINTED.

13. When Tom said in his confessional, "When I kissed Raquel, I felt hope." To me, this is a ridiculous cop out and him trying to justify his horrible actions.

14. When former VPR cast member Kristen Doute went over to Ariana's house to counsel her, Ariana was explaining what Tom's camp came out and said to the public. "They said [my and Tom's] relationship was one of companionship and convenience and not love and romance." Talk about a pathetic excuse.

There is a lot to digest here! Tell me all your VPR finale thoughts in the comments below.

Watch the finale episode and more Vanderpump Rules on Peacock!

Read in BuzzFeed: https://apple.news/A8c0k-w_SSgeJfc25GHuI6Q

Shared from Apple News

Sent from my iPhone

[jmflowers]

30, 31, 36 :)

30. favourite tv show(s)

Impossible to answer. But the top few I've been obsessed with through the years are...

Ghost Whisperer (started watching when I was in middle school and was a hardcore fan the entire time it was on air - the first show I ever wrote fanfic for when I was about 12)

Alias (found it towards the end of its run, but watched and rewatched religiously for many, many years - I can still recite the season 1 opening monologue)

Grey's Anatomy (there's a huge gap of time between my obsessions here, as I binged through various genres of shows for a few years before being forced into Greys at 17 - my first ever episode was Song Beneath the Song and then I inhaled all of it in its entirety a couple of times... this was the first show I was involved in the fanfic corner of fandom for and began posting my own work online)

Orphan Black (this is just really, really solid Canadian-made sci-fi, but it ended a few years ago and I still haven't been able to watch the last two episodes which is embarrassing... can't get over that one death)

Gilmore Girls (who doesn't watch this show on loop every once in a while? fell into it in 2017 and found the best companion fanfic ever written that I've never been able to locate again... a truly iconic time in my life)

The Haunting of Hill House/Bly Manor/literally anything Mike Flanagan touches (I'm a sucker for good horror, especially if there are queer women involved... I've watched most of Mike Flanagan's work a few times and Bly makes me cry every time)

Covert Affairs (I loved this one when it was on air, but I binged it again at the start of COVID lockdowns and was reminded how comforting I find a spy drama, especially when all the locations they shot at are within driving distance of where I live)

Station 19 (if I hover in that happy space of season 4 Maya x Carina moments, this is the best place to exist... struggling greatly with over-analyzing it because of what I'm studying in school, though, so I'm like a season and a half behind on episodes)

And then, of course, there is a vast collection of shows I enjoyed greatly during the period of my life where I binged everything I possibly could from specific genres to "study the story arcs and writing development". There are too many to name, but if it was on TV before 2010, I've probably seen it.

31. 3 random facts

I have a "rare" disease/condition called Chiari Malformation that basically means part of my cerebellum doesn't fit inside my skull and is instead in my neck. When I was first diagnosed, my doctor pulled Gray's Anatomy off her bookshelf and read the section on CM to me, as she'd never heard of it before.

For much of my childhood, the mere sight of a giraffe would make me cry (out of pure excitement). Everyone took this to mean I needed to be gifted anything and everything giraffe-related for the rest of my life.

I often wake up with songs stuck in my head. Occasionally, they are songs that I haven't heard in my waking-life for several years. I think I must dream about music.

36. 3 dreams you want to fulfill

Oh, man... It feels like there is so much, but most of my genuine wishes are relatively small and simple.

I'd love to see The Script perform in Dublin, Ireland. (There's something about the recordings of their hometown shows that just get me choked up every single time.)

I'd like to climb a mountain at least once in my life. Standing on a peak is incredible and I can only imagine how amazing it must feel to reach one as the result of your own physical determination. (There's a group called 29029 that does an event where you scale a mountain over and over again a certain number of times in 36 hours until you achieve the altitude of Everest and... that. I wanna do that one day.)

I'd like to pack up and separate myself completely from all the familiar securities I've always known, just to see what I'm really capable of. I think it'd be a perfect opportunity to travel and experience the world without the blinders of my life thus far.

question game

[ariaisabitch]

ALRIGHT LOVE IS BLIND REACTIONS AGAIN

idk i did these last season and got a lot of notes from it so. Time for a single lesbian to judge a bunch of random straight people!!

S3 Ep2

I did episode one but then tumblr crashed and i lost it all and no way in hell am I re-typing all of that. Just know that I already dislike Cole and am feeling antsy with uhhh whatever his name is. The dude in the first couple. Ok anyways onto the reactions ig.

BRENNON. His name is Brennon. Idk I feel like he's gonna react badly to Alexa (probably cause i'm plus size as well and have that same fear LMAO)

MAN'S WHISPERED "Yes!" under his breath when he saw her, nvm.

Awww ok they're kinda cute. They're like the awkward couple, but they're awkward together. Love that.

HES JUST STARING AT HER AS SHES SPEAKING OK NVM ALL DOUBTS ARE GONE. Why can't I find me a girl like that. This show is so rude.

oh yeah this girl got rejected twice in the same day. Ouch. I mean, I understand their sides cause why would you marry someone when they can't decide what they want? Like this show is literally speed dating x10000000. But also I understand her want to find someone to love her, I just don't think it would be on this show of all things.

YO THIS DUDE GOT MARRIED AT 18 FOR 8 YEARS? AND THEY BROKE UP? FUCKING OUCH. Holy shit. Give this man a massive ass hug.

Ok, she's literally just gonna go to her third choice? This feels like another Jess situation ngl. This shit happens every season omg.

(yet i eat it up everytime)

Yo, Nancy is so fucking beautiful, man. Like holy shit.

Andrew gives me douche vibes. Just the way he holds himself. Dude has barely talked yet and i'm like "nope. ew" he's literally bragging about traveling and cars and shit dude.

Nvm, man's just dropped some really deep shit. Wtf. Where tf did that come from? the casual sip afterwards

I know she did not just basically call this man humble.

Bartise is giving me bad vibes. Like he hasn't necessarily done anything that bad yet, but he just feels off. Idk.

Raven is so gorgeous too. Weren't these the two that randomly started working out on the first date? I forget. oh wait she said she was insecure about something, i missed it.

Honestly, I think the Bartise feeling i have is just his voice. I just really don't like his voice LOL

She's just pacing around in a circle, and she keeps looking directly into the camera and it's fuckin hilarious omg. Girl is just doing hip thrusts as he tells a story.. Dude this girl.. LMAO He's opening up and she's just doin jumping jacks.

LMFAO HE HEARD HER WORKING OUT, THATS GREAT. Aww i kinda feel bad for him now.

SK's voice on the other hand, is so smooth. I could listen to this man read me audio books bro. YOO HIS PARENTS ARE POLY?? Omg this man is an absolute sweetheart. I like SK way more LOL. He's so nice about everything.

HOLY SHIT WAIT COLE

HE LOOKS LIKE AMBER AND BARNETTS KID

I KID YOU NOT

He annoys me so fucking much tho omg. I feel like he's trying to be quirky hyper, but he's just annoying hyper.

Zanab is great as well. They're all so nice this season and then the dudes are shit. Except for SK and- why tf is he crying? is he fake crying or just? cause both are incredibly weird. He's fake crying... wtf. Anyways. Except for SK and Brennon.

THEY DATED FOR A FEW MONTHS, GOT MARRIED, AND SHE LEFT HIM IN A FEW MONTHS AFTER THAT? Girl nah, that's a red flag in itself. There's a reason that girl left.

dude just casually asked her to be his girlfriend. He's like the fucking couch steve impersonator from last season that dated natalie.

Colleen and Matt. Forgot about him. Why do so many men have southern accents here? I think it's like two actually. Oh wtf, I blanked out and now he's talking about getting cheated on. Ok, but that situation actually does suck ass.

LMAO RAVEN JUST STOPPED AND STARED AT IT. Can she say no, man? Like, if he's about to propose let's just say no. SHES JUST EATING CHIPS WHILE HES ABOUT TO PROPOSE. Honestly, I don't feel sorry for him ngl. He sounds like a prick rn. LMFAO HER FACE OMG THATS AMAZING.

"I go out there looking for girls that make me feel better" absolutely not.

LMAO THIS GIRL. SHES AMAZING. Raven has been picked as my favorite this season. Absolutely love her. Queen.

I KNOWWW HES NOT TALKING SHIT ABOUT RAVEN. LMAOOOO he calls raven obviously very attractive and SK is like "She's very smart! 😁" he's adorable.

Bro Nancy is just picking the douchebags. Like Andrew needs to be humbled, and Bartise needs someone to smack sense into him.

Nancy is so cute, girl I need you to run. Rip those heels off and full on quarterback run outta there.

Wtf is this? Silent disco? That's not random at all. Literally where tf did that come from.

"I wouldn't want it any other way, I want love in your way" this man..

Cole is a literal child omg

i can't believe she said yes. Well i mean i understand it, but me, personally. Absolutely not.

Matt, that "me too" was not convincing at all

AWWW YEAH SK IS PROPOSING

Her pacing around the room is such a mood

SHE DID NOT JUST SAY "YES SIR" LMAOOO

"Husband material" girl.... be honest...

"i couldn't see myself being with zanab" yeah cause you got rejected by your number one. Rightfully so.

ok i did not need to hear her moan

"has bigger boobs than i expected" bruhhhh

ok that's enough kissing... ok...

i feel like nancy's gonna pick baurtise and it makes me anxious

I don't think Andrew's amazing, but he's better than baurtise.

[kinetic-elaboration]

October 18: Yellowjackets S2 Eps 1-6

I took the morning off sick from work, so life is going really well right now. I did manage to make it in, and then go shopping afterward. I've felt mostly okay since coming home--tired, but not sad. I watched another episode of Yellowjackets (took me like 2 hours with pausing and so on) and soaked my feet, which does seem to be helping with how badly they've hurt the last couple days. It doesn't usually feel as good as I think it will while I'm doing it, but it feels better after.

Anyway, I don't know what to write about and I also really want to shower and get to bed, so here are some few thoughts on YJ S2 so far. I've just finished Ep 6, Qui.

I guess I get why some people really don't like this season and consider it a sharp drop off from S1. I don't, but I haven't been totally inhaling it like I did S1. It's slower, I think. That makes sense for the 96-era scenes: it's winter, there's not as much to do, they're losing their minds a little. I've read some criticism of those scenes too and various arguments as to how they could be done better but I honestly don't take any issue to anything (other than having to get used to the idea that newly introduced minor characters have been here this whole time). They do a lot to provide plot even though what's really happening is they're sitting around devolving: Tai and Van's relationship, Misty and Crystal, the mouse, Ben's alternate life (which I actually find rather chilling), the Javi stuff, and of course, the growing cult situation. The mood of the scenes matches the mood of the characters matches my mood while watching.

The '21 story line... I don't know. Mixed feelings. It's a little frustrating that every YJ is doing something totally different. A part of me gets it, like, they are all being ushered toward the compound and I still have 3 episodes' worth of plot for them there... and I also get that there was a fair bit of separation between stories in S1 as well. But it feels like the separation is more severe now; they're even in different genres in a way. I was also worried at the end of S1 that killing Adam would sort of spiral the show into something else--it's hard to not make a big deal out of a literal murder--and that's sort of happening. But only for Shauna. I actually do like how the story is allowing for Callie and Shauna's relationship to develop, but it still feels... like they opened a can of worms with this and now they're either stuck with it for a while or they have to stuff the worms back in as fast as possible, which will be unrealistic and unsatisfying. And what of uh Shauna literally killing a man? I know it might be nothing compared to the '96 crimes, but it still doesn't really gel with me, that she would be really that unbothered. That seems to make a claim about her character that I don't think is otherwise supportable. I don't know. Just thinking as I type here.

I don't hate the wilderness compound stuff at all, though I'm not quite sure what to make of it yet (or Lottie... a tough nut to crack for me honestly; she's like almost a couple different archetypes but not quite), and I like Taissa and Van meeting up again. I love Van. I love Lauren Ambrose. I want to watch Lauren Ambrose in everything. Van grew into one of my favorites over the course of S1 and I'm liking where she's going in S2. Tai's story in the pre-Van eps surprised me a little: she is spiraling way harder and way faster than I thought; it was very creepy and well-done, though.

This ep (6) was really hard to watch, as I'd been anticipating, and I definitely did cry at the end. Well done but sad. It's like you can't even be angry at something that upsets you that much when your emotion is tempered by respect for the craft. That's how I feel anyway.

[irregularjohnnywiggins]

So, because I'm in a Doctor Who mood at the moment and you all willingly followed me, here's one of my favourites in the ongoing saga of 'Doctor Who continuity does not matter, except when it does':

In the 1996 Movie, the Doctor opens the film describing the Master being put on trial on Skaro and summarily executed by presumably the Daleks, and for the next 26 years fans have been confused about that plot point, although I will note with amusement that they're not confused about how exactly Skaro is back when the last time we saw it the Doctor tricked the Daleks into blowing it up.

No, the main thing that threw people about this line is that... the Daleks have a legal system? The literal embodiments of fascism and ethnic cleansing have a concept of 'innocent until proven guilty'? The routine manipulators and masters of deception, who in every story they appear in working alongside someone else inevitabily kill them as soon as they get the opportunity have a concept of perjury? When I say fans have been confused about that plot point for 26 years, I'm not kidding - I still occasionally see someone edit a Dalek into a judge's robes and wig, or an Ace Attorney case, and whilst that may simply be the immortal and unfailingly funny joke of Daleks doing anything aside from ethnic cleansing, I can't help but feel like it's also a reference to this.

However, I have good news for you all: this plot point is actually explained, and in a really cool way to boot, in the 2006 Big Finish Audio Drama I, Davros. See, the framing device of that series is Davros conveying his backstory to the Daleks, for this stated purpose:

Dalek: YOU ARE ON TRIAL.

Davros: And I am to recognise the authority of this "court"? Daleks holding a trial... how low have you sunk without me? ... For what crimes am I accused?

Dalek: NO CRIMES.

Davros: Then what am I on trial for?

Dalek: YOU ARE ON TRIAL!

Davros: I say again, what- Ah... I see. Not a trial. I feel like secondhand goods. I cannot be returned if you consider me faulty!

It's never explicitly stated, in this piece of EU or any other to my knowledge, but I do like the idea of the Daleks trying out the Master to see if he'd be able to help them, and coming to the conclusion that the Master is way too unstable an ally to trust him - especially because, this being at the end of Seven's time and the beginning of Eight, we're barely a few centuries away from the Time War, where the Time Lords will actually resurrect the Master specifically to fight for them, and I just really like the idea of the Daleks being more savvy of what the Master is than the Time Lords.

It's also a great example of what I mean when I say 'Doctor Who continuity does not matter, except when it does': Doctor Who is a massive endeavour, it would take 18 straight days without sleep or breaks to just watch the tv show, let alone all the supplementary stuff like Torchwood or SJA or Big Finish, but the series is built so that its really easy to get into it - pick a starting point (a Doctor, a companion, hell watch all the Dalek episodes and nothing else if you want) and you're off, and you don't need to worry about continuity the way you would for, say, your average comic. But at the same time it is really fun to get into the lore, and debate and argue about stuff like the Daleks holding a trial or the Timeless Child vs the crying boy in the barn or hell even what the hell all the plot holes and inconsistencies mean in a Watsonian sense. Doctor Who is one of those experiences where you get in what you get out, and I love it for that.