#But like that is an insane amount of research to consider any of this for a song that doesn't do anything

[persefoneshalott]

"Tholomyes is something of a Spaniard" bc 'Tolouse and Tolosa are cousins' (Tolosa is on the Basque Country, north of Spain) but then says it's a Gallega song (from galicia, another autonomous community from the North) and the song says "I'm from badajoz" which is in Extremadura, west & south of Spain.

[mothercetrion]

Johnny & Kenshi's "Relationship" in MK1

Well before MK1 was released, Ed Boon had this to say about Kenshi (and Johnny) and their roles in the story:

I was incredibly interested in this "relationship" from that moment and really hoped that it would pay off like he said. I think it has done so tenfold, and I wanted to compile their moments throughout the story together and go through their relationship arc, moment by moment, chapter by chapter, for everyone to enjoy.

This post contains spoilers for both Kenshi and Johnny's roles in MK1, as well as major plot points of the story itself. You have been warned!

To start, if you want to watch a compilation of their moments, you can watch this YouTube video by MKIceAndFire, which includes everything discussed in this post up to Chapter 7. 

Chapter 2: Their First Meeting 

The climax of Chapter 2 is the back-to-back events of Johnny’s wife, Cristina, leaving him, and Kenshi entering soon after. Kenshi is here on a mission: retrieve Sento from Johnny, no matter the cost. They fight, and Johnny wins. It’s here that they introduce themselves properly (or Kenshi introducing himself to Johnny), and Johnny learns more about his motives and why he needs Sento so badly. He does so to save his family, the Taira clan, from the Yakuza, which they joined for protection after the Siege of Aomori, according to Johnny. 

Soon after, Liu Kang, Bi-Han, and Kuai Liang arrive, where Johnny thinks that the trio is a part of Kenshi’s retrieval mission. After Johnny and Bi-Han fight, Liu Kang tells both Johnny and Kenshi about their new role as Earthrealm’s champions. Johnny openly questions Kenshi’s inclusion, still hardly believing his story about being part of the Taira clan. The chapter ends here. 

We know from here that Kenshi and Johnny openly do not trust one another and likely hate one another. For Kenshi, Johnny is the one thing in the way of his goal of saving the Taira clan from the Yakuza. When arguing with his wife, Johnny reveals that he paid 3 million dollars for Sento; considering that their impending divorce is over money, it makes sense that he is not willing to just give it to some stranger. 

Chapter 3: Bickering 

Johnny and Kenshi do not have many scenes in Chapter 3, with most of its focus being on Raiden, but the few scenes they have show us a lot about the state of their relationship. The four Earthrealm champions—Johnny, Kenshi, Kung Lao, and Raiden—discuss their circumstances and their training with the monks. Johnny expresses his desire to see Outworld to do research for the movie franchise that he hopes to make; according to him, they’ve been “cooped up” training for months. Kenshi sarcastically calls him selfless, and Johnny states that he’s only there to get Sento back, indirectly stating that they’re both only training for selfish reasons. Johnny also harshly calls him “Tattoo” as a nickname, not even using his last name as Kenshi does for him. 

When Johnny is defeated by Raiden in the mini-tournament set up by Liu Kang, the two glare at one another while Johnny exits the fight and Kenshi enters. The scene is adorned with dramatic music (relating to the tournament at hand) and a slow-motion shot of their expressions. The choices here are likely to emphasize the disdain they have for one another and the insane amount of tension they have between them. 

That night, before Raiden and Kung Lao fight, Johnny attempts to bet on Lao’s potential victory. Kenshi is open to a bet, but only if Johnny puts Sento up for grabs. Johnny laughs and says, “Not on your life,” revealing that he has not budged on his desire to keep Sento after all this time. 

They have a brief scene when the group leaves for Outworld where Johnny starts filming Kenshi. Kenshi turns with an annoying expression and knocks his phone out of his hand, much to Johnny’s shock. This scene is the last they have in this chapter that has any real significance, minus standing by one another. 

The few scenes they have in this chapter show that their relationship has not improved since they met a few months prior, even after spending every day together; if anything, it has gotten worse and more openly hostile. They judge one another’s reasons for being champions for Earthrealm and still do not respect one another. 

Chapter 4: More Fighting & Kenshi’s Blinding 

We play as Kenshi for the duration of this chapter. The two of them, alongside Kung Lao, are tasked with finding Shang Tsung for Liu Kang to question. Kenshi openly questions Johnny's inclusion on the mission and openly states that he would prefer Raiden to go along with them instead of “this one,” making it known that he does not value Johnny as a fighter or a teammate. Johnny protests and insists that he’s up to the job of finding Shang Tsung. Before they depart, they glare at one another once more. 

When out in the Outworld desert, Kenshi and Johnny begin to bicker once more. Johnny brings up the 3 million dollars needed to buy Sento and tells Kenshi that he would likely have Sento back in his possession if he were still with the Yakuza. Kenshi turns around quickly to yell at Johnny about the corruption that the Yakuza spreads and his desire to get his clan out, all while shining his flashlight on Johnny’s face.

After meeting Baraka and ending up in Shang Tsung’s laboratory, the three of them ambush Rain, Tanya, and Shang Tsung in an effort to save Mileena from what they believe is a Tarkat infection. Johnny makes the “get away from her, you bitch” reference that it feels like everyone has seen, much to Kenshi and Lao’s visible confusion. 

Kenshi defeats both Tanya and Rain in battle, and he briefly speaks to Mileena before her illness makes itself known. It is here that Kenshi does something he’s not done all of the story: he calls Johnny by his first name instead of just “Cage.” He asks for a hand in fighting Mileena, and Johnny hurries over to help. Johnny asks about a plan, and Kenshi states that the only real plan is to not hurt her. Johnny is visibly shocked and says that he’s more worried about “us” getting hurt than Mileena. 

They fight Mileena, and Kenshi and Johnny win. Kenshi asks Johnny and Lao (again calling Johnny by his first name) to hold Mileena down so Shang Tsung can administer the serum needed to subdue her Tarkat symptoms. They do so briefly, and she eventually knocks Lao away and goes to bite Johnny’s face. Instead, Kenshi comes from behind, grabs Mileena by the straps of her outfit on her shoulders, and pulls her away, saving the life of someone that until just minutes before, he has been shown to hate. 

Then Mileena shoves Kenshi away just long enough to grab a pair of sai from a nearby table and gouge Kenshi’s eyes out. His blood sprays, and Johnny is hit in the face with the splatter. In the horror of the aftermath, he yells Kenshi’s first name for the first time, nothing short of terrified and worried. The chapter ends soon after this. 

This chapter is the official shift in their relationship. This chapter is when both characters finally refer to one another by their first names, though it is all we see of any sort of genuine appreciation of one another. Kenshi calls Johnny by his name in the midst of immediate danger; he needs Johnny’s help, and he’s visibly frightened in the scene itself. Johnny calls Kenshi by his name in the aftermath of the danger, when he just saw someone that he’s known for months lose his eyes in the most vicious way possible (and gets hit with his blood in the process). The shift is not seen until later chapters, but Kenshi going blind while saving Johnny’s life is the catalyst for the change. 

Chapters 5 & 6: New Bonds

In Shang Tsung’s laboratory, the first thing Johnny does when he wakes up is check on Kenshi. He says his first name again, asks him about his pain, and states that he will not forget that Kenshi saved his life for the price of his eyes. 

Johnny himself is the one to give Kenshi his blindfold, torn from his own armor and placed over Kenshi’s eyes with his own hands. He is the one to give him the medicine and relieve him of some of the discomfort from his blinding in his own way. Johnny is the one who adds to Kenshi’s iconic character design; it’s forever associated with him and his kindness. 

When they’re finally able to escape the laboratory, Kenshi asks Johnny and Lao to leave him behind. Johnny refuses and wants to save Kenshi’s life. Kenshi tells Johnny that he is “useless” and that their lives do not need to be risked to save him. (He once again calls Johnny by his last name here, instead of calling him “Johnny” like he did hours before.) Johnny insists that the Taira needs him, and they’re going to get him back home and get him help. 

They walk through the Living Forest together near the back of the group; Johnny is the one who guides Kenshi around. Johnny continues to look back at Kenshi as they’re walking around to make sure he does not trip or stumble. He makes a remark about a movie he did that Kenshi reveals that he has seen before. Johnny comments on how difficult the scene was to shoot, but he is proud of the outcome. Kenshi says that he can “picture it exactly” and smiles for the first time since his blinding, a strong contrast to his earlier depressed state. 

They continue until they meet Ashrah and debate whether or not to hunt Quan Chi. When Kenshi steps forward to go, Johnny firmly tells him no, citing that they need to get him home. He’s visibly annoyed and perhaps even frustrated when Kenshi insists that they need to find Quan Chi to find Shang Tsung. In the end, Johnny is the only one opposed to continuing their mission. 

The penultimate moment of their development is the scene at the end of the chapter in which Sento is returned to Kenshi. Kenshi tries to fight Quan Chi, and Johnny is quick to tell him no, stating that Kenshi will trip up the others. He then asks Kenshi for his sword, and Kenshi hesitantly agrees. Johnny does what was previously established as impossible and gives Sento back to Kenshi. Kenshi is stunned, and then he tries to reject Sento. The one thing he has wanted for all this time, the singular reason that he hates Johnny in the first place, he tries to reject it. Johnny insists that it’s Kenshi’s now because he saved Johnny’s life. “It’s yours,” he says, and he means it. 

Chapter 6 largely focuses on the fight between the group and Quan Chi, but it’s the chapter in which Kenshi’s sight is “restored” with the help of his ancestors. After a fight with Ermac, Sento is imbued with the souls of Kenshi’s ancestors, who promise to help him. He is then able to sense his surroundings in a new form of sight, allowing him to fight as he did before. He also discovers his telekinesis soon after. 

Johnny and Kenshi have a brief exchange about Sento after this. Johnny jokes that he severely underpaid for Sento when he bought it and asks if Kenshi knew what it could do, which he did not. Johnny tells Kenshi not to forget who gave him the sword; Kenshi promises that he will not. They go back to calling one another by their last names, but instead of earlier in the story, when they were distant from one another and not friends, the use of last names here almost feels…kinder. Maybe even affectionate? Like calling a friend by their last name instead of someone that you dislike. 

These chapters are what solidify their bond. It starts with Johnny’s worry and concern over Kenshi’s well-being and safety, something that continues through the rest of the chapter. He checks on him in the dungeon, he is the one to give Kenshi medicine when he knows he’s in pain, and he motivates Kenshi to continue living when they leave the dungeon (and makes it known that he will help him however he can once they get him home). He makes it known that he’s willing to give up on Liu Kang’s mission, something that could potentially save Earthrealm, for Kenshi to be safe after losing his eyes. It’s one of the first things that Johnny clearly takes seriously. Until this point, he makes jokes about almost everything, but when it comes to Kenshi going home, he’s all serious and makes his opinion on the matter known. 

Their conflict regarding Sento is also resolved here. Just hours before this chapter, Johnny brings up the 3 million dollars he paid for it and his unwillingness to part with Sento unless Kenshi gives him the money. However, after Kenshi saves his life, Johnny gives it to him to potentially repay a debt. Kenshi essentially traded his eyes for Johnny’s life, and Johnny recognizes the importance of such a sacrifice. To him, giving him Sento is likely only the beginning of what he does to repay him for what he did. 

Their value in Sento differs greatly. Kenshi wants Sento because of the value it has to his family and their well-being. While Johnny seems to appreciate Sento’s history, the sword is still something with monetary value and something that helps Johnny “project” a celebrity image to fans. He is his possessions; he is what he spends money on. But Kenshi’s blinding makes him realize, in the worst way possible, that some things are more important than money. 

These chapters (4, 5, and 6) also show Johnny and Kenshi saving one another’s lives. Kenshi physically saves Johnny from Mileena in the laboratory by pulling her off of him before she can bite his face off. Johnny emotionally saves Kenshi when he’s at a low point following his blinding; he is the one to motivate Kenshi when he calls himself useless and asks the others to leave him behind, even if it means certain death. Johnny also helps save the Taira clan by willingly giving up Sento, something that he knows means a great deal to Kenshi and the rest of his family. 

Chapter 15: A New Arc in Their Lives 

The pair make a lengthy absence until the later chapters of the game, and they are not seen together again until the final scene of the final chapter when they are eating at Madam Bo’s restaurant. They’re sitting together on the same side of the table while Johnny talks about the location of his movie. He turns to Kenshi with a smirk when he laughs, and Kenshi assumes that Johnny will be the star of his franchise, as he always seems to be. 

Johnny then asks Kenshi to be in a movie, stating that no actor can do things quite like Kenshi. Kenshi openly admits that he would love to, but his work with the Taira keeps him busy. (However, we see in Johnny’s ending that he still involves himself in the movie-making process.) 

Liu Kang moves to leave for Outworld, and Johnny stops him to thank him for bringing them on as Earthrealm’s champions. He quickly glances at Kenshi before stating that joining him has truly changed the arcs of their lives, just like Liu Kang said it would. 

This final scene with them is just the beginning of those new arcs. Compared to their first meeting, Johnny and Kenshi have found a new respect for one another and a bond forged in a shared adventure and what looks like conflicting goals. By this chapter, they have undergone an entire arc of their own, and their lives are changed by one another as a result. 

Their new arc is only beginning.

[house-of-vandernacht]

To everyone freaking out over NM S2 premiering a wee bit later than expected. The amount of time/effort R&F put into this is colossal. They constantly and consistently pull 60-70 hour weeks. Week after week with no break, upwards of a year and longer, to the point they flirt with burnout like Leo/nore flirts with Annabel. That to me is the exact opposite of lazy. Over the last year, I and others have witnessed this mind-blowing work ethic first hand. Its insane the amount of work they put in. Often eps are well over the minimum panel amount, they don't have to do 10-20 panels more than the minimum, but they do it as they want to tell a good story with each episode ending where it feels natural. The next thing: Nobody is entitled to any creator's time, or gets to dictate how they spend their personal time off. A hiatus is merely an opportunity to create buffer. R&F are under no obligation to use it that way. It is their choice to. It is also a time for them to regroup, recover from fatigue -- as any artist or writer knows headspace is important to the creative process -- attend to the shop, catch up on any admin that needs doing, and a litany of other things that people need to do to go about their daily lives. This break -- because lets call it what it is, if this were a normal 8-6 we'd call it UPTO -- is for them to take time to themselves, same as any other job. If they want to play Star Dew Valley to relax or decompress or ruminate on an idea, who the heck are we to deny them that? They're two human beings, not machines.

Thirdly: Please consider: There is so much more that goes on behind the scenes of a comic of this calibre that we as readers don't see. (Think of an iceberg, how they are so much bigger than the tip that pokes above the ocean's surface.) R&F don't just make it up on the spot. There's script writing, planning, research, editing, more planning, rough storyboarding, more research, tests, and probably a heck of a lot more pre-production stuff than I can even guess at before sketching can even be considered commencing. We don't know their creative process, nor are we entitled to demand an explanation of their process, or that they use their personal time differently. (Personally, I listen to music and walk but what is one person's jam, might not be another's.) Nevermore S2 premiering a little later than expected is not some big drama its being made out to be. Its perfectly normal. I cant count the amount of times I've heard some comic/ book/tv series/movie has been delayed for whatever reason. (I've been waiting seven years for one book I won't mention here, as an example.) I don't know about you, but I know Id much prefer to read something that has been well thought out, with attention to fine detail applied to it than something rushed and shoddy. Give them grace to cook! I know we might be a wee bit disappointed, especially when we're so eager to find out what potential horrors might befall characters we've grown to know and love on the eve of one heck of a tantalising cliff hanger, but I ask that you all show a little patience and, more importantly, understanding.

[qqueenofhades]

Okay, sort of on that note: I know we are all thoroughly enjoying the Bird App's destruction and drama and firing shots in the air to keep our property values low and complaining about Twitter users moving here and all the rest. But I'm gonna be real with you for a second and offer a Hot Take that might well get my Tumblr elder credentials revoked:

As long as they are willing to play ball with us and understand the rules of the road and etc (and lbr, we have plenty of absolutely idiotic Disk Horse of our own, that will never go away), we should a) actually be glad that they're coming here and b) recognize the far more sinister aspect of Twitter's slow motion Jenga collapse. Because it's all fun and games until the massive human rights violations and democracy destruction starts (or rather, continues). Why is that? Well:

As noted a few weeks ago when this insanity started, the second-biggest investor in the Twitter takeover, apart from Musk himself, was the Saudi government. Now, I have a friend whose PhD dissertation in sociology I have been copy-editing/proofreading for the last few years (he is originally from Saudi Arabia but doing his PhD in the UK). A huge part of his research is about how ordinary Saudis use Twitter HEAVILY, and as a replacement for the freedom of speech they aren't allowed in any other formal aspect of their country, despite many cosmetic reforms and plans for greater international investment and openness. The Saudi government, while tolerating this newfound criticism on the surface, has also routinely jailed these citizens for one critical tweet about them, including those made while the person in question was not in the country. In other words, they're not nearly as happy about this as they like to pretend, even if they're putting a good face on it, and especially during the Arab Spring and other attempted uprisings/calls for reform in the region, Twitter was a hugely effective way to circumvent government narratives and get out community information. After all, it is the biggest communication platform in the world, and anyone can instantly use it.

So, enter Musk: a petty alt-right billionaire who pals with dictators and can do anything he wants by burning ungodly amounts of money. He partners with the Saudis. Two weeks later, Twitter is going down in flames, its entire top legal team has quit, Musk is braying about bankruptcy, advertisers have fled, it's 50-50 whether it survives the year. And yes, this could be because Musk is a sociopathic idiot, since he is. But if you consider that this one evil prick can literally destroy half of the world's only medium of quasi-free speech and community organising just by throwing $44 billion at it... well... that's a lot more sinister than just him wanting to make "free speech" for all the absolute dregs of the Internet who adore him. In other words, it starts to look awfully deliberate, and Musk is anything but a fan of democracy, community organising, and all the rest.

Anyway: Tumblr doesn't function the same as Twitter, we don't want it to, and we are able to laugh at its burning corpse because many of us don't rely on it as our one and only place of meaningful speech and ability to criticize the government. But if Twitter DOES go down in flames, it will be a huge and irreparable loss in a real sense, and in that case, if you see a Twitter user poking their head in here, give them some rules of the road, advise them to change their icon, and otherwise let 'em stay.

[redrose10]

The next chapter of Cinnamon & Vanilla should be out mid-to the end of next week. We’re getting close to the end and I really appreciate all the support on that one. Here is a little sneak peak at the next story that I plan to release. As you can probably tell I’m very Yoongi biased. This one will probably just be one big story instead of a multi chapter thing, but that could change. Let me know if this is something you’d actually be interested in reading!

Inn Keeper Yoongi x Female Author Reader

Summary: You have never experienced true love which is hilarious considering you write romance novels for a living. When you end up staying at The Interlude Inn located in Holly Falls you start to wonder if maybe the answer to your newest love story is sitting behind the welcome desk. Quickly, you find out that Min Yoongi hides a lot of pain and sorrow behind his shy smiles and quick glances.

Warnings: (may get updated) Swearing, character death, very very angsty for a while, mentions of physical and verbal abuse, bullying, a really mean letter, panic attacks, eventual light smut, it will get better

Teaser Below The Cut

Once you arrived at the airport you really wished you’d done a little more research about Holly Falls. After some digging and a conversation with a very outgoing Uber Driver you found out that eleven months out of the year the town is very low key and relaxed, but for one month it is a tourist hotspot thanks to the insane amount of blooming cherry blossom trees. According to your new Uber friend, people come to Holly Falls during this month to see the fields of trees blooming in all their glory. The normally quiet town embraces the crowds providing various festivals and parades and gimmicks to draw in the guests as well as their wallets. And of course you just happen to travel over there smack dab in the middle of it all.

The driver dropped you off in the middle of the fun so with your bag slung over your shoulder you started heading into different hotels trying to book a room. In the city you could walk into pretty much any hotel at any time and book a room. You had assumed it would be same in this small town so you had decided to wait to book a room until you could see them in person wanting to get the feel and make sure you chose the right fit. You imagine in any other month it would be much easier to obtain a place to stay here, but due to the large tourist presence every single hotel was completely booked for the entire month.

You were just about ready to give up and head to the airport to see about booking a flight home when an older gentleman came up to you carrying various handmade trinkets for sale.

“See anything you like miss? All of these are under $10.”, he asked.

Politely you smiled, “No thank you. Not right now.”

You thought he had left until you saw him dangling a hand painted sun catcher in front of you. The design a beautiful beautiful cherry blossom. Trying to bite your tongue and not snap at the elderly man you again shook your head.

“Here have it for free. You seem to need a little cheering up.”, he smiled.

Reaching up you grabbed the delicate glass from him, “Thank you. I really appreciate it. I’m sorry if I came off rude. I’m just really stressed out right now.”

“Didn’t know about the cherry blossom season and now you can’t find a place to stay?”, he asked.

“How did you know?”, you replied wide eyed.

The elderly man chuckled while taking a seat next to you, “There’s always at least one person that gets stuck here with nowhere to stay because they didn’t know how crazy things can get around here this time of the year.”

“Mmh yeah that would be me this year. I need somewhere to stay for a couple weeks or I’m going to have to head back home.”

“You know there might be somewhere that still has a room available. It’s just outside all of the hubbub. About ten miles just over that hill. If you get to Taehyung’s Strawberry Farm then you’ve gone too far.”, he said pointing in the opposite direction of the festivities.

“Really? You think they’d have a room? I wonder why they wouldn’t be booked like every other place.”

The gentleman stood up from the bench you were both on, “Its worth a shot. It’s a little farther away from all the action than people like to be. Plus the owners are a little on the unique side.”

You were concerned at this statement. The last thing you wanted to do was end up being the story line of a true crime documentary.

He continued, “They are very nice people. A young man and his grandmother. They just tend to be very secluded and to themselves. It’s called Interlude Inn. You can’t miss it.”

You thanked him for the information and watched as he walked into a large group of people trying to sell the rest of his merchandise. Placing the delicate sun catcher in your bag you ordered another Uber to take you over to the inn. A familiar vehicle quickly pulled up in front of you with the same talkative man from earlier. You wondered how there weren’t any other drivers available, but you smiled as you slid in the back seat anyways.

“Leaving so soon?”, he asked.

You chuckled, “No I just need to find somewhere else to stay. Can you please take me to The Interlude Inn?”

Suddenly the man stopped, turning to look back at you.

“Miss you don’t want to stay there. Surely there’s somewhere else around here you can stay.”

“Every hotel is completely booked. If this inn doesn’t have a room then I’ll have to just go home.”

He sighed, “Alright miss. If you insist.”

He began the drive to your location. His words about finding somewhere else stuck in your mind.

“Sir?”

“Yes Miss”

“What you said earlier. What is so bad about this inn?”

“Well, the grandma, I think her name is Mae, is very sweet. She’s done the best she can with what she had. But that Min boy, he’s a little odd.”

“Ohhh…Like serial killer odd?”

The man chuckled, “No not that kind of odd. He’s just very quiet and keeps to himself, but he is polite. He’s never seemed to have any friends and I doubt he’s ever had any kind of relationship. He comes into town only a few times a year, mostly when his grandmother needs something. He doesn’t acknowledge anyone, even when they speak to him directly. People usually only stay at the inn as a last resort during this busy season.”

From what you’re hearing he seemed like just a quiet introverted person who loves his grandma. You weren’t sure why everyone seemed so leery of him.

The car pulled up infront of the inn. The large wooden sign out front verified you were indeed at The Interlude Inn. Thanking your driver you grabbed your bag and made your way up to the entrance.

The Inn looked cozy and welcoming. It was smaller than you had imagined. There couldn’t be more than three or four rooms. Off to the side you noticed a little garden with various plants starting to bloom.

On the door hung a welcome sign adorned with hand painted lady bugs and butterflies. Turning the handle you gently pushed in the door being greeted by a heavenly aroma making your stomach grumble. The entrance room which also doubled as a living room had two couches, one on either side of a coffee table. A television hung on the wall above a fireplace. In the corner was a small desk which you assume would be where you could request a room.

Walking over you noticed a younger man crouching down so he was eye level with one of the drawers. He appeared to be about your age, mid to late twenties. Black hair with a slight curl to it hung over his forehead. Beautiful cat like eyes and his soft lips formed into a deep pout. You wanted so badly to reach over and squeeze his chubby cheeks, but you knew that was a weirdness you didn’t want to invoke. He was fidgeting with a drawer that seemed to be stuck and you could here the argument he was having in soft whispers,

“Come on you stupid thing.”

“It shouldn’t be this difficult.”

“Please, I just need a pen and then I’ll leave you alone for the rest of the day.”

You chuckled hearing him begging the drawer to cooperate. Reaching into your bag you grabbed one of your spare pens and set it on the desk, “Here I have a pen you could use.”

The young man let out a sudden squeal after you startled him. He jumped backwards and landed on his behind with a loud thud.

“Oh no I am so sorry. I didn’t mean to scare you. I thought you had heard me come in.”, you apologized feeling terrible.

The poor guy sat on the ground trying to collect himself before bringing himself back to a standing position. That’s when you noticed his cheeks were a bright shade of red, making you want to squeeze them even more. The man didn’t say a word. His eyes were barely able to focus on you, instead they would move around the room before returning to you for just a second before he’d quickly look elsewhere.

“Ahh this must be the Min boy the driver was talking about?”, you thought to yourself.

[musings-of-miss-j]

no rest for the wicked (nor the foolish)

part three: in which you're further reminded of the doctor's unsavoury methods while childe and a mysterious stranger occupy your thoughts

a harbingers x gn reader series!! (includes dottore, childe, arlecchino and pantalone x reader. the rest of the harbingers will most likely not be romantic interests)

notes: slowest burn that ever did burn, snarky and a tiny bit socially anxious reader, gn reader who is occasionally referred to as 'miss', fluff, crack

warnings: G O R E . blood, unethical scientific experimentation, minor character death, dottore is his own warning and frankly the reader is a little morally questionable too, reader experiences a small identity crisis and kills a man, attempted drugging (dottore tries to place the reader under the influence of a truth serum)

please let me know if you find any pronoun slips!!

series masterlist

word count: 5539 words

*  ੈ✩‧₊˚*  ੈ✩‧₊˚*  ੈ✩‧₊˚*  ੈ✩‧₊˚*  ੈ✩‧₊˚**  ੈ✩‧₊˚*  ੈ✩‧₊˚*  ੈ✩‧₊˚*  ੈ✩‧₊˚*  ੈ✩‧₊˚**  ੈ✩‧₊˚*  

“Oh, Lord Two? Um… At twenty to three.” Anya told you.

You cursed softly under your breath. It was half past two, so you teetered just on the edge of being late, considering how difficult it was to navigate the ridiculous labyrinth- like palace. You grabbed your best copy of your thesis, the typewritten one you’d paid an outrageous amount for in Fontaine, as well as your notes on your current research; elemental magic and the human body. It’s quite ambitious, the sage of your Darshan had told you, which roughly translated to ‘you’re completely insane if you have even an inkling of hope that this is a worthy investment of your resources.’

After carefully placing the stack of paper into the slim wooden casing Tighnari had made for you, you grabbed your room key and ushered Anya out while flipping through your notebook for the map you’d drawn. You locked your door before all but sprinting towards the spiral staircases, taking the steps two at a time. You were out of breath by the time you reached the landing, but the humiliating prospect of being late was enough incentive to maintain the brisk pace despite the searing stitch that grew in your side. (Cyno would roll his eyes and bracingly tell you that even a scholar needed regular exercise, and damn him for being right.) Several twists and turns and anxious glances at your pocket watch and notebook later, you arrived at the door with four minutes to spare. With a pleased huff, you rebalanced your glasses on your nose and ran your finger down the seam of the door and wall. The words flickered sky blue, and it eased open when you thought please. Telepathic magic at its finest.

you took care not to seem winded as you entered the laboratory. The Doctor had his back to you, focused on something out of your sight. You heard faint whimpering, and when you approached you were a little sickened to see a man strapped to the vivisection table. He was clearly drugged, eyes wide and pupils dilated, and the Doctor methodically pulled a long, red string from a tiny gash in his inner elbow. With a jolt of revulsion, you realised that the string was the man’s arteries. Archons above. You knew the Doctor was morally dubious at best, but surely he could’ve conducted such an experiment on a fresh corpse and yielded similar results. Bruises littered the man’s face, yet the rest of his body was perfectly intact, not a single broken bone though one of his eyes was swollen and his lip bled from a deep gash. Even the clothes he wore didn’t bear signs of extreme wear, not ragged or bloodstained. No more violence than necessary. You clenched your teeth. The subject must remain in a semi-controlled state to ensure validity of the experiment. His sleeve was tidily rolled up to his elbow, but the incision from which the Doctor withdrew the arteries gushed blood in a wavering rhythm; that of his heartbeat, which slowly but surely dwindled. The Doctor didn’t even look up from the forceps he was using to carefully draw out the blood vessels, inch by inch, when you approached him and the test subject. The man spotted you, and even in his delirious state he began to thrash and unintelligibly beg around the gag in his mouth. Distaste swelled in the back of your throat; he hadn’t even been granted the dignity of unconsciousness.  The restraints caused blisters and redness where they touched his skin, a sure indicator that he’d been strapped there for a few hours at least. You grimaced, but resolutely kept your eyes on him as the Doctor (ha. The Doctor) slowly, methodically, lovingly pulled out his lifeline. You didn’t deserve the comfort of looking away.

The experiment was familiar. The Akademiya sages, blasted hypocrites they were, had utilised it time and time again; the awful nature of the tests they conducted was a well-known and universally unacknowledged secret. So really, you didn’t even have the luxury of claiming yourself innocent or different from the Doctor. You’d known, just as well as any Akademiya student had known, that lives whittled away like wood chips at a carpenter’s workshop within the walls of the building you’d called home, and you’d done nothing to stop it. For science, you’d let yourselves think. For philosophy, for the good of humanity, for art, even! Looking at the Doctor now, his mask obscuring his expression but his jaw and mouth relaxed, his gloves and forceps stained red as he tugged away at this test subject’s- this person’s life with nothing more than a controlled flick of his wrist, you couldn’t even bring yourself to be adequately horrified. Which you suppose, in the very act of being accustomed to such gruesome displays, made you a monster too. To your dismay, the man wouldn’t even die. He gasped and wheezed and clawed at the table he was strapped to, and after counting to ten (no more than ten second’s suffering, Tighnari had taught you) you leaned across the table and cleanly snapped the man’s neck.

The Doctor’s pace never faltered until the red cord broke, a pile of it laying in a glass dish by his side and the other end indistinguishable in the red of the man’s wound. You stared at the body on the table, the broken neck. Yet another death on your hands. You were the one to break the silence this time.

“I suppose this is some form of a test, doctor.”

“You’re quite right,” he confirmed smoothly, turning away from the body on the table and discarding his gloves. You sighed, tightening your gloves and glancing at your watch. The whole thing had taken barely ten minutes. Ten minutes to wrench the blood vessels from a human body. Usually it took longer. Bile rose in your throat at the way your mind so readily supplied the information.

“Did I pass?”

He grinned at you over his shoulder as he washed the blood from his hands, staining the water.

“With flying colours.”

“Joy,” you deadpanned, tugging at the collar of your cloak. The presence of a fresh body cloyed the air, pressing at your airways. You could never get properly used to this part, the blaring absence of life where there previously had been one. The Doctor walked back over to the vivisection table, pulling his leather gloves on along the way. Well, technically it’s an autopsy table now.

“This pathetic excuse for a man was a traitor to the Tsaritsa,” he began, staring down at the body. For once, you were grateful the mask hid his eyes; what if you’d seen glee, contentment in them? “Let it be known that this is the fate awaiting all who follow the same path.”

“Duly noted, doctor.”

“I do hope so.” He turned his faceless gaze onto you. “I’d hate for my student to end up nothing more than a test subject.” And strangely enough, he would dislike the experience of having to perform such a procedure on you. The thought perplexed him; why would he care? Bizarre. 

“I doubt you’d feel anything at all,” you countered, handing him the wooden case filled with your paperwork. You wished you’d been late, now. You wished you hadn’t been crowned valedictorian and piqued the Fatui’s interest. Perhaps then you could’ve left these malpractices behind as a chapter from your past. “Do enlighten me as to the purpose of this particular experiment, doctor. Other than observing my reactions to it.”

He ignored you in favour of reading your notes. Bastard, joke’s on you. You’re listening to me either way, whether directly or indirectly.

“Perhaps I should start calling you by a different title,” you remarked, more to yourself than him. “’Doctor’ isn’t very fitting after this display in human compassion.”

To your surprise, he answered, though without looking up from the papers you’d handed him.

“No. You will continue to address me in your usual manner.”

“As the doctor wishes,” you replied, making sure to inject a healthy dose of sarcasm into your voice as you took out the solutions you’d be using that day. As Nilou would've said, the show must go on.

A servant arrived some time later to wheel the body away, calm and unfazed. Clearly this was a routine occurrence, and you ruminated over the likelihood of being tied to the vivisection table yourself as you worked. By the time the thin, watery rays of light burned orange with the sunset and pierced through the relentless snowfall, you’d decided that it wasn’t a particularly pressing concern. If the Doctor had, for whatever reason, wanted to experiment on you specifically then the Fatui wouldn’t have gone through the trouble of recruiting you. They would’ve discreetly whisked you away instead. Hardly the most reassuring of conclusions to arrive at; regardless, as you measured out samples of the newly made elemental stabilisers you concluded that it could definitely be worse. After all, you had access to a marvellous lab and infinite time to pursue your research. And the Doctor was inarguably a genius, despite… Well, everything. You didn’t exchange any more pleasantries for the remainder of the day. Concocting the elemental stabilisers was a delicate process with disastrous consequences if your hand so much as slipped, and talking to the Doctor was mentally taxing enough without the threat of a possible electro explosion looming over your head. He read through every one of the papers you’d given him, and every now and then you hazarded a glance in his direction to try and determine his thoughts. A fruitless endeavour, as his expression (or at least what you could see of it) remained completely impassive as he sorted through the stack of notes. Still, having an academic higher-up evaluate your research was as nerve-racking as it had been in your first year, and you resented him for doing it in front of you. That was probably on purpose, too.

Once the stabilisers had been painstakingly measured out and stored away, you squinted at your watch to check the time through the remaining vapour after making the pyro-hydro stabiliser. The pearly face revealed that you’d been in the lab for four bloody hours, and your stomach pointedly seconded the fact by growling loudly enough that surely even the Knights of Favonius heard it. You noted the time you’d spent and the solutions you’d made into what you were coming to think of as your Fatui notebook, and after wiping your glasses clean of the spatters you made your way to the door.

“Take your documents with you if you’ve already finished.”

‘Already?’ Did four hours and twenty minutes of work not constitute anything? Damn him.

You pivoted on your heel and turned back to take your things from the Doctor’s desk.

“Anything else, Doctor?” you asked, rearranging the paperwork back into the order you’d had it in.

He settled on a response that he knew would get on your nerves, so that he could derive the thrill of watching you reign in your anger. “Fetch me a pot of tea,” he replied idly, his focus on the last piece of your paperwork.

“With respect, doctor, I am not a maid,” you said pointedly. Irritating as it was, you had to hover on the other side of his desk and wait for him to finish reading. Why would he tell me to take my things if he hadn’t even read them all yet? You were beginning to suspect that every one of his actions was specifically tailored to invoke annoyance, though how he so effectively pushed your buttons was beyond you.

He looked up from your report on the effects of prolonged elemental exposure on ancient mechanisms. It was one of your best, and if he attempted to criticise it you had at least sixty different explanations on why your method was the most effective. Defensive much? Alhaitham’s voice mocked.

“Are you refusing to accommodate your superior’s requests?” He replied, a contented smile spreading across his face. You took a deep breath and rationalised that punching said face wasn’t a suitable course of action, no matter how alluring it was. He didn’t even have the grace to hide the fact that he enjoyed prodding at your composure. Didn’t he already have tea anyway?

“Not at all. I'm merely bringing the inconsistencies of your requests to light,” you explained as civilly as possible. “The assistance required of me pertains to academic matters, and you don’t see how this includes fetching tea.”

“Then join me for tea instead.”

Your eyebrows must have reached your hairline. “I beg your pardon?” Every expression suited you, it seemed; each new reaction was something truly worthy of documentation.

“You heard me.” The Doctor’s vexing smile hadn’t slipped an inch. He leaned forward across the desk. “Take a seat. Or do you intend to display further insubordination?”

You tamped down the urge to snap and lowered yourself into the chair across from him. The report he’d been reading lay forgotten on his desk, and your eyes paused on the sheet of paper beside it. The writing on it wasn’t yours, and you realised with a touch of trepidation that he’d been jotting notes about your work, and although every one of your published reports had been approved after prolonged evaluation by the Akademiya you still had to swallow the lump of apprehension in your throat. He really did embody the air of a professor ridiculously well, with his ceaseless arrogance and lofty attitude, and it brought back too many memories of being a nervous rookie for your liking. A servant brought in a tray laden with a teapot, two cups and a plate of cake. Just when did he call for that? The Doctor poured out the tea, still smiling and being much too cordial not to rouse suspicion; as such, when he offered you a cup your first thought was poison. You stared at the tea then back up at him, frowning slightly.

“What’s the real purpose of this little exercise, doctor?” 

He had the sheer nerve to chuckle and lean back in his chair, relaxed and unhurried, as if you were so terribly silly for having your guard up.

“Do you need a reason to have tea with my student?”

You levelled him with a long, pointed look; the kind you used to give to the younger students you’d tutored every now and then. It wasn’t quite as effective on him, but he did drop the mocking smile with a sigh.

“Drink the tea,” he said bluntly, leaning forward with his elbows on the desk as if to analyse you more closely. “That’s an order.”

You snorted. “Well, doctor, you’ve just given me a marvellous incentive to not drink this tea at any cost.”

A muscle twitched in his cheek, but his lips remained in a straight, neutral line. You wondered what expression his mask concealed. (Annoyance would be the answer. He’d expected you to fall headfirst into his little trap; perhaps he’d underestimated you.)

“I am not patient enough to allow for your defiance. Drink the tea.”

You pursed your lips to hold back a grin. The Doctor had given you the upper hand by issuing an order you could refuse, and even though he probably did it willingly it still gave you no small satisfaction. Besides, your curiosity was piqued. What could possibly be in this tea that he so desperately wanted you to drink?

“Perhaps I’ll be more willing to acquiesce to your demand if you tell me precisely what’s in it.”

He released a long-suffering sigh, dropping the friendly act altogether, and leaned back in his chair. He tugged thoughtfully at his leather gloves, and it struck you as humorous that you shared such a similar tick.

“A truth serum.”

You raised your eyebrows. “And is that all?”

“I doubt you’d believe me even if I said yes.”

You laughed despite yourself. What a pleasant noise. Winning an interaction with the immovable Doctor so early into your studies was quite amusing, not to mention a massive ego boost.

“You’re quite right,” you conceded, relaxing in your seat and surveying him thoughtfully. “I'm grateful that you didn’t take a different route and simply inject it directly into my bloodstream when the chance presented itself.”

“You should be,” he replied, brusque and perhaps even irritated. Clearly he didn’t share your amusement. “It’s a mistake I won’t repeat.”

“The Fatui are so terribly fond of their blatant threats,” you mused, pulling your watch out of its inner pocket to check the time. “Wouldn’t it be more productive to ask your questions and see what I try to lie about? I'm sure you’re adept enough at reading body language to identify the truth.” At this point you were just gloating, trying to string him along. A fatal flaw you readily acknowledged in your personality; you savoured victories with a little too much enjoyment.

The muscle in his cheek twitched again, and you couldn’t help but feel quite pleased with yourself for getting on his nerves to the point where you could identify the tell-tale signs. The logical side of your brain thankfully decided to return to the situation at hand rather than calculating how long it would take for you to make significant progress in your research (two weeks maximum, if you were clever about your time), and you regained enough clarity to recognise that what you was doing was incredibly stupid. Riling up a Harbinger; Archons, where did your self-preservation go when your pride took the wheel?

You shoved the smug grin off your face and fastidiously schooled your features back to neutrality, slipping behind a façade of polite detachment. The Doctor, by contrast, smiled and tilted his head to the side as you forcibly removed the emotion from your face.

“Fascinating,” you heard him whisper, and for the sake of your own sanity you pretended you hadn’t. He fixed you with a stare that you could acutely feel even through his mask, and you stared right back. Two mad scientists.

You brushed the thought away; even if you did go insane you doubted you’d ever reach the Doctor’s level.

“You may leave. I expect you to be here at seven o’clock every morning.”

“Understood, doctor.”

He gestured at the door with an elegant wave of his hand, picking up the report he still hadn’t returned. You shot one last fleeting look at his writing on the separate sheet of paper before leaving the laboratory.

And bumping straight into Childe.

It took a few muffled curses and a thank you to every higher power you could think of that your glasses remained intact for you to regain your bearings, and the first thing you did once the corridor stopped spinning was shoot Childe a glare, though it was somewhat half-hearted.

“You’re incredibly lucky that my glasses didn’t break.”

He just laughed and even had the sheer nerve to ruffle your hair. You were so shocked by the gesture that for a moment you didn’t move to stop him, but once your brain had caught up with the situation you batted his hands away.

“And what would you have done if I did break your glasses, Trixy?” He challenged, following you down the spiral staircase with that ever-present grin. “Defeated me in a duel?”

Archons alive, he’s teasing me.

“No, no,” you replied sweetly. “I’d just slip some very potent toxin into your food.” Two can play at that game.

That elicited another delighted laugh.

“Stick to the battleground you’re familiar with, eh?”

“Naturally.”

You turned to enter the hallway where your room was, but he grabbed your cloak and tugged you in the opposite direction despite your protests.

“Oh, what are you doing-“

“You missed lunch,” he cut you off, practically dragging you out into the courtyard. It looked much more welcoming than it had when you’d arrived, with the hazy glow from the sunset glinting off the snow and the nearby sound of a chirping bird carrying through the chill air. You even glimpsed tiny blue flowers peeking through the layer of white. You relented, letting him pull you along without resisting.

“Oh, yes,” you agreed absent-mindedly, watching a fox with fur white as the snow disappeared into a burrow at the base of a pine tree. Someone within the palace probably fed it regularly, considering how it made no effort to hide itself.

“Is Dottore already overworking you?” He asked with a touch of humour, linking his arm in yours as he led you through the cobbled pathways. For some reason, you allowed it.

“He tried to poison me,” you offered, lengthening your stride to keep pace with him.

“That does sound like him,” he agreed with a snort as he dragged you into a pavilion adorned with glittering golden lights, which were naturally of the floating, magical variety because Archons forbid the Fatui do anything without being ridiculously extra. Still, watching the gusts of snowflakes through a golden frame wasn’t such a terrible experience, even if it didn’t offer any shelter from the biting cold and you had to properly fasten your cloak to keep it out. Childe evidently didn’t see the point in such frivolities, considering he wore nothing but that grey suit and the amused way he watched you adjust your gloves.

“You won’t miss lunch tomorrow, will you?”

You idly wondered why he was so fixated on that.

“Do the recruits and Harbingers even dine in the same place?”

“Don’t dodge the question,” he said mock-sternly. You chuckled.

“In the very act of issuing that instruction you also dodged my question.”

He dismissed the technicality with a flippant wave of his arm, leaning against the railing of the pavilion.

“Quit shoving your intellect in my face with those fancy words,” he said, his grin taking on a playful tilt.

“Only if you stop calling me by that childish nickname.”

He guffawed. “’Childish.’ Good one.”

You groaned, raking a hand down your face at the dreadful joke. Truly Cyno levels of unfunny, though you suppose you did set yourself up for it. He nudged you in the ribs with his elbow before you could swat him away.

“You scholars are so uptight,” he teased. “If you can learn all that complicated science jargon then you can also learn to take a joke.”

“I can take a joke perfectly fine. I'm tolerating your presence right now, aren’t I?”

He let out a sigh, throwing an arm around your shoulders and ruffling your hair with his fist. You immediately tried to shove him away with an indignant yelp, but you might as well have been a harmless ladybird as far as he was concerned. “You have no respect for my position as a Harbinger, Trixy,” he told you in a jokingly strict tone of voice.

“You’ve done nothing to earn it,” you countered, wriggling out of his grip and running a hand through your hair in an attempt to rectify the havoc he’d no doubt wreaked.

“Will I earn it if I defeat you in combat?”

“Why, of course,” you replied with as much sarcasm as you could muster. You’d been reliably informed of its sheer magnitude. “Considering my untouchable physical prowess and how magnanimous a defeat it would be if you somehow succeeded.”

He laughed good-naturedly. “I’ll have to challenge you to a duel, then. Can’t have my ego taking such a beating, can I?”

“Oh, Archons forbid. Anything but your ego.”

 The snow picked up, and you rushed back to the palace before it could pose a difficulty to finding your way back. Looks like a blizzard. Childe pushed the enormous front door shut and a few snowflakes fluttered inside only to melt the moment they touched the floor.

“Dinner should be ready in half an hour,” he told you as you approached the door to your room. Your stomach eagerly took this as a cue to growl.

“Three meals a day? We’re truly living in the lap of luxury.”

“So I’ll see you then?” Completely immune to sarcasm, as you were coming to learn.

“Alright.” you resolved to ask Anya to show you where the dining hall was so you could finish a quick lab report before eating.

He turned a corner and left the hallway, whistling cheerfully as he went.

The dining hall, as you came to learn in the coming days, was incredibly far away from your room. No hastily-sketched map would suffice to navigate the maze of corridors and ridiculous number of stairs, and you realised early on you’d most likely have to bring food back with you so you wouldn’t be obligated to make such a long trip every day. You were pondering the intricacies of what food would keep better and what options might be available when Anya gestured towards the dining room and then left. Embarrassing as it was, you still couldn’t find your way through the palace without guidance. The dining hall was massive and utterly packed with people as always. And unnecessarily lavish, but this particular aspect you were growing accustomed to the longer you stayed in the palace, though you still thought the crystal chandelier was a bit too much.

There weren’t many tables close to the windows because you was a little late to dinner that day, but you were nothing if not determined to maintain your own contentment, so you approached a table that was empty save for a young woman in purple robes and a swarm of strange creatures fluttering around her.

“Is anyone sitting here?”

She didn’t even spare you a glance.

“No.”

Ah, a fellow non-conversationalist. You sat down and began eating, surveying the dining room’s occupants and the whirling blizzard outside. You toyed absent-mindedly with the idea of striking up a conversation with the woman; after all, in a place like Snezhnaya where allies were few and far between especially for an outsider, even a casual acquaintance in the workplace would be beneficial. But it would also open more chances for backstabbing, figurative or literal. Best leave her be. You noticed with an uncomfortable prickle that every last person in the room wore a mask, though they varied in style and intricacy; the recruits with their bronze talismans had simple grey and black leather covering their eyes while the few odd silver talisman or Vision holders donned beautiful, decorative pieces. Though not as elegant as Signora or the Doctor’s, you noted as you ate. You wonder why you weren't given one.

As if she’d read your mind, the woman across from you spoke.

“Where’s your mask?”

It sounded almost like a demand, as though she believed herself entitled to the information, though a glance at the charms hanging from her waist revealed she held a bronze talisman just like yours; your ranking was more or less equal. It struck you as odd that a mere recruit would assert such authority in conversation, and you pondered the buzzing purple-winged creatures around her as an excuse to think before replying.

“I didn’t receive one.”

The buzzing picked up as the creatures flitted back and forth through the pointed ears on the hood of her cape. She abandoned her food in favour of staring at you through the slits in her mask.

“What do you mean you didn’t receive one?”

“I mean exactly what I said. I arrived here less than a month ago and wasn’t given a mask.”

“Ridiculous,” she muttered under her breath. You refrained from rolling your eyes.

“Which Lord or Lady do you serve?”

“Why the interrogative tone?” you asked pleasantly, or as pleasantly as you could in your irritated state of mind.

“Answer the question.” Her plate forgotten, she was leaning forward across the table with her eyes trained on you, and you once more marvelled at her brazen attitude.

“Am I obligated to answer?” You asked after a moment’s thought.

“Yes-“ she cut herself off, clearing her throat and relaxing back in her chair. “No. I guess not.”

You raised your eyebrows and took a bite of food. The Snezhnayans really were fond of their fish.

“You’re not really a recruit, are you?”

“What exactly are you suggesting?”

Her snappish manner was more than enough of an answer.

“I’d wager a guess that you’re a higher-up undercover,” you replied, twirling your spoon contemplatively. “Your behaviour is far too authoritative for someone who’s supposedly at the bottom of the metaphorical food chain.”

The buzzing purple creatures vanished into thin air. That surprised you; the annoyance they’d invoked had been enough to convince you they were real. The woman’s gaze was palpable, and you made a valiant attempt to pretend you didn’t notice it.

“You’re right,” she said abruptly. You hummed in acknowledgement, refraining from asking her about her real identity. “But who are you?”

“Me?” you offered her a quick smile. “I'm a recruit, well and truly. Not a disguise to be found.”

“Yes, yes,” she conceded impatiently, rapping her knuckles on the table. “But you didn’t tell me what Harbinger you serve. Or your name.”

You swallowed the lump of apprehension in your throat; the alias you’d chosen to keep your real name secret still felt unfamiliar and blatantly dishonest on your tongue.

“I'm apprenticing under Lord Two,” you said, avoiding her second question entirely. “Where did the horrible buzzing things go?”

“They were illusions,” she replied dismissively, confirming your suspicions. “How did you obtain such a position?”

You fiddled with the clasp of your cloak. “Is it a particularly difficult endeavour?”

“Dottore has never taken on any subordinates.”

That caught you off guard, and you nearly overlooked the fact that she addressed him the same way Childe did. Could she possibly be a Harbinger too? But why would a Harbinger go undercover at their own base of operations?

“Really?”

“Yes. I'm still doubtful over whether or not you’re telling the truth.”

“And I'm curious as to why you care.”

She chuckled under her breath.

“Fair enough. Trade?” She suggested, tapping her fingers on the edge of the table. The soft tap noise stuck out more than the hubbub of the room, and you wondered if it was a trick similar to that of the illusionary purple things intended to keep your attention on the conversation.

“Alright. One question in exchange for another?”

“Deal.”

Meeting a kindred spirit was truly an unrivalled joy.

“How exactly did you manage to gain an apprenticeship with the Doctor?”

You hesitated. Sharing the details of your offer didn’t seem to be a very clever idea until you remembered the Doctor telling you that verbal agreements were legally binding in Snezhnaya. How bothersome.

“I was sent a letter from the Director offering me the position a week after graduating from the Akademiya.”

The woman made a contemplative noise and drummed a pattern on the table with her fingertips.

“What’s so special about you that the Director saw it fit to offer you a never before available position?” She asked bluntly. Well damn, girl. Hit right where it hurts.

You grinned. “One question was our agreement, yes?” Her face contorted into a scowl, and you had to admit her anger was indeed fearsome.

“My turn. Who are you?”

“I'm not going to tell you that.”

Huh? You cursed yourself for so readily believing she’d uphold her end of the agreement. Clearly you’d spent too much time in Liyue, where contracts were irrefutable law, and this morally questionable and easily twisted system still came as a shock.

“That’s… not fair in the slightest,” you remarked, pushing away your empty plate. “But at the very least it confirms you’re in a high enough position to disregard the rules without a second thought.”

A pleased smile graced her face, and you suddenly and very belatedly realised that she was beautiful in a sharp, morbid sort of way; like the edge of a well-polished knife or a brand new musket.

“Fairness doesn’t concern me. This isn’t Fontaine, after all.”

“Have you ever visited?” you asked, more out of polite curiosity than anything else. If she wouldn’t outright tell you her identity, then perhaps you could glean a clue from the exchange of pleasantries.

“Yes,” she replied shortly. Clearly she didn’t share your sentiment, though it was rather understandable; if she really was as high-ranking as you suspected then she could gather as much information about you as she wished without having to resort to seemingly empty conversation.

“Do you refuse to give me so much as a hint about your identity?” You pressed, resting your chin in your hand and watching her pensively.

“Yes. I refuse.”

With a disappointed sigh, you stacked your cutlery onto your empty plate and left them on the table like you’d seen the other recruits doing.

“Quite cruel of you to pique a scholar’s curiosity and leave it unfulfilled like that.”

A flash of her teeth in another smile.

“What can I say? I'm a cruel woman.”

“So I'm coming to realise.”

You left the table with a nod in her direction, puzzling away at the interaction and wondering who exactly she could be.

*  ੈ✩‧₊˚*  ੈ✩‧₊˚*  ੈ✩‧₊˚*  ੈ✩‧₊˚*  ੈ✩‧₊˚**  ੈ✩‧₊˚*  ੈ✩‧₊˚*  ੈ✩‧₊˚*  ੈ✩‧₊˚*  ੈ✩‧₊˚**  ੈ✩‧₊˚*  

[explicit-tae]

Cruel Intentions (Final)

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Cruel Intentions: Organized Crime | Overthinking (Drabble) | Reward (Drabble)

Warning: masturbating (m), Jin-Seon being spoiled, dirty talk, oral (f receiving), jungkook constantly complimenting mc, unprotected sex, slight dirty talk, mentions of abortion, vomitting,

Word Count: 20,521

Description: While in therapy, Jungkook and you reveal secrets while Hyun-woo makes his long awaited appearance that threatens everything Jungkook worked too hard to achieve.

Jungkook concluded that he didn't like witnessing you crying - and you were nothing but a stranger to him. The harsh tears streaming down your face was aggressive - even as he sits in his car, windows tinted, he could see the clear tears.

You didn't see Jungkook - you never did. It was dangerous to not notice your surroundings and realize the same black car with tinted windows following you - but Jungkook was no threat to you.

You were speaking onto your phone to whom Jungkook assumed was your brother, Hyun-Woo. You're trying to be quiet, but even from inside his car - tinted windows only cracked slightly - he could hear your words to Hyun-Woo. You're angry, rightfully so, now having to go into your savings to get the man out of jail.

It wasn't the first time Jungkook has followed you - to which you never noticed. He couldn't answer his own question when he'd ask himself why he was invested in you. He'd tell himself it was because you were Hyun-woo's sister and Hyun-woo was someone who owed him money. It wasn't anything far-fetched - it could be easily paid with a paycheck, yet Hyun-woo didn't have a steady paycheck coming in.

The day you got Hyun-woo out of jail, Jungkook watches as your face twists into one of disappointment - you didn't cry, yet your eyes show immense sadness. The research Jungkook did of Hyun-woo was that the man had gone through something to turn to drugs - his drugs no less. You were the youngest of five children and Hyun-woo was once a hero in your eyes - yet you never gave up on him.

Jungkook kept his eyes on you as you and Hyun-woo went to a local diner for breakfast, even after you wasted all of your savings to bail the man out of jail. Jungkook has a clear view of you and Hyun-woo eating - the older man sculfing down an insane amount and all you could do was laugh.

Maybe that's why Jungkook decided he wanted that - you. He wanted someone who didn't give up easily. No matter how many times Hyun-woo would promise you that he was done doing these drugs, the older man always found a way into his office with the amount of money needed for a week supply of high.

Jungkook was never the one to sell to any junkie off the street - but Hyun-woo was different. This man was once the man that owed him money and was shorting his men each visit. Jungkook had to take matters into his own hands and use whatever he needed as leverage. He would consider Hyun-woo lucky that he had a large family who all had children to go home to at the end of the night - all accept you.

But Jungkook never harmed women - as long as he watched you go to and from work and visit your family, his mind was never adament on "hurting" you. You were already a woman hurting - working long hours and chasing after your elder brother to ensure he wasn't either thrown in jail or dead. But you never gave up on Hyun-woo - not even after time and time he would disappoint you and go back to his old ways.

And Hyun-woo went back to his old ways, now sitting in Jungkook's office.

Jungkook leans forward at his desk. He's holding the small bag of white powder as he flickers it in front of the man's eyes. Hyun-woo visibly stiffens, his eyes following the small bag of cocaine.

Jungkook removes said cocaine from the small bag and onto his desk. He reaches into his pocket to grasp his wallet. He takes out his card - a random credit card - and begins to line up the cocaine. "Do you want to try?" he asks Hyun-woo, only glancing up once he was done lining the cocaine.

"I-I don't have money-"

"I didn't ask you that." Jungkook hisses. "I asked," Jungkook leans back into his chair. "did you want to try the product?"

Hyun-woo gulps. Yes, he did. Yet he couldn't. He was in an insane amount of debt that he owed to Jungkook spanning for months. The drugs Jungkook contained were like no other - powerful and pure, but expensive. The first couple occasions in which he bought from Jungkook (not directly, Jungkook was no dealer - he had men for that), he was able to pay it back in full. Yet, he grew restless with the drugs and the high it gave him - it was becoming something he couldn't live without.

Hyun-woo found himself having to steal just to make up the money back to Jungkook - and to just borrow more drugs. It was a constant rotation that ensured he'd never be out of debt when it came to Jungkook and Bangtan in general.

"Okay." Hyun-woo murmurs in defeat.

Jungkook watches as Hyun-woo snorts the cocaine, his mind on you and how disappointed you'd be right now if you were here. While you worked hard to pay your bills and attempted to save what little money you had - Hyun-woo was sitting here getting high off of his product. It was a shame, really, how naive of you to think that Hyun-woo would stop just because you asked him to. The man was far gone, no longer being the man you knew of him when you were a child - and it wasn't your fault.

"Do you have any family?" Jungkook suddenly asks - but he already knows.

Hyun-woo clears his throat, pupils dilated. "Y-Yes."

Jungkook caught onto the look in Hyun-woo's eyes - the look of disappointment in one self.

"Are they proud of you?"

Hyun-woo scoffs. Jungkook never cared to get personal with anyone. Hyun-woo was brought into his office and expected to leave on a warning. The warning being his thumb cut off until he got his money - failure to do so would result in him leaving the office dead the next time. Yet, he couldn't do that - not to Hyun-woo. He had plans for the man and death was not an option.

"I failed all of them." Hyun-woo shrugs. The high's getting to him and he's rambling as if Jungkook's an old friend. "Y/N is the only one who speaks to me and even she can't look at me without being ashamed." Hyun-woo sniffles, his nose itching from the powerful substance, while leaning back. "She works so hard. Too hard."

You do, Jungkook thinks, but not for long.

"Is she the one that's going to pay me my money?" Jungkook crosses his arms. He knows his answer already - Hyun-woo stole from you before, but that didn't mean it was his first option. He started by stealing from others first, breaking into homes to find whatever he could to pawn for cash.

Hyun-woo shakes her head. "N-No. I can pay for it." he insists. "I don't want her involved in this. She...She's not like me."

Jungkook know's this - you aren't like Hyun-woo.

"You said she is the only one who speaks with you?"

Hyun-woo nods. "Y/N isn't a quitter. She should've gave up on me long ago."

Jungkook clicks his tongue. You weren't a quitter - and that would be difficult for him to break. You were stubborn and far too dependant on yourself, yet Jungkook had dealt with worse.

"Here," Jungkook places a few small bags of cocaine in front of Hyun-woo. "it seem's like you need it."

"I can't take this." Hyun-woo protests. He's deep into debt and Jungkook never gave product for free.

"Sure you can." Jungkook chuckles. "You have a week to get my money back. You can leave my office, Hyun-woo."

"There should be no secrets anymore if the marriage is going to work." Ren - a therapist that's been working with Bangtan for years - speaks to Jungkook and you. "Do you want the marriage to work, Y/N? Jungkook?"

"Yes." Jungkook answers without a thought. He glances at you. "I do."

You nod your head slowly. "As do I." you responded.

It wasn't a lie - even after a year of having Jin-Seon and being back with Jungkook, you concluded that you'll never be rid of him - not while Jin-Seon binded the two of you together. It was easier to give into the relationship instead of running and denying Jungkook. You were glad that Jungkook now wasn't the same nearly two years ago - even if Jungkook was more lenient with you.

Jungkook now takes things slow, not trying to push you too hard into anything. It was only recently that Jungkook and you slept in the same bed together - starting because Jin-Seon cried until the two of you hugged him close. Jin-Seon's bed was large for him - tiny for two grown adults, but the two of you made it work. Now Jungkook and you decided to sleep in the same bed - back into his large bedroom - and Jin-Seon climbs into the bed to sleep between the two of you.

"Y/N. What do you think of Jungkook as a father?" asks Ren.

You're taken aback by the question, but respond nonetheless. "He's an amazing father." your response was low, but you meant every word of it. "Jin-Seon loves him so much. He...always calls for him when he isn't home."

It brings a smile on Jungkook's lips to hear you say those words. It makes his heart flutter even thinking about his son calling for him. It was difficult being away from Jin-Seon - especially when he woke up to nearly falling off the bed while Jin-Seon and you were sleeping peacefully in the middle. It was times like that he savored - waking up to his wife and son.

"Jungkook? What about you?" Ren turns her eyes to Jungkook. "What do you think of Y/N as a mother?"

"She's incredible." Jungkook doesn't miss a beat. "It comes naturally...her love for Jin-Seon. I love watching the two of them - even if they're not doing anything. Just knowing they're happy makes me happy."

Jungkook catches your eyes but doesn't hold it. He's embarrassed slightly - you and him have been coming to Ren for a while now in hopes of fixing your marriage (organically). Talking about his feelings was never something he was good at, but it was refreshing.

"I'm glad the two of you are coming to terms with one another." Ren places her hands in her lap. "Are there any secrets the two of you wish to share?"

You shake your head. There wasn't a way for you to have secrets from someone like Jungkook. The only one you could say was you being pregnant, yet he found you just as Jin-Seon was born.

"Yes." Jungkook murmurs and the room feels as though it's closing in on the two of you.

"Is it something that's going to make me look at you differently?" you question without looking his way. "If so I'll rather you keep it to yourself."

What you didn't know wouldn't hurt you. Whatever secret Jungkook had you didn't wish for it to come between you and him. You were finally starting to trust him again - as a husband and a father. Jungkook allowed you freedom (along with his men if he wasn't available) and in return you gave a little bit of yourself. You'd rather be left in the dark then return to the way you were a year prior.

"I found your birth control." Jungkook swallows. "I changed them to placebo pills."

You inhale.

"I tracked your periods and ovulation cycles. Ever since...we have become intimate. Before Greece." Jungkook doesn't look your way - he's unsure how you'd react to his confession. "I know Eun-Young gave them to you. She's the only one who could've."

Jungkook never confronted Eun-Young or his brother, it was best that he solved the problem himself. Eun-Young didn't have the privileges you had and the last thing he wanted was for his brother to go overboard in punishing her.

You suppose now you got your answer on how you got pregnant while on the pill. You snort loudly, shaking your head. The sadness you felt that day taking the pregnancy test is a feeling you'd never forget - the depressive thoughts conjuring in your mind soon after.

"I want the two of you to speak alone. I'll be right outside for about five minutes." Ren excuses herself.

Once the door closes, Jungkook turns to you. Your expression is unreadable, but Jungkook doesn't stop. "I shouldn't have done it and it was selfish of me to do that. I...if I can take everything I've done to you back I would. I-"

"It gave us Jin-Seon." you interrupt him. You finally catch his eyes - swimming in a sea of regret and guilt. "As unhappy as I was early on in my pregnancy..." you try to find the correct words. It was complicated to think back on your life and how you felt - but there shouldn't be anymore secrets. "...I couldn't imagine my life without Jin-Seon."

"I can't imagine a life without both of you." Jungkook comes closer to you. He left you space on the couch as he always did, but now he takes your hand in his.

You're stunned. Jungkook's hands are warm and his thumb gently strokes your hands. It was weird being sentient with him. Jungkook and you were once so affectionate prior to having Jin-Seon and dealing with the wedding - yet it changed after you came back to him. He didn't rush anything with you - always saying he loved you and never expected you to say the words back. When he hugged you, he always made sure to ask for your permission first and never overstepped any boundaries.

"Do you remember what I told you in Greece?" Jungkook tilts his head, eyes scanning your reaction. "I promised that nothing would ever happen to you or our children."

You did remember - faintly. It was the night you insisted on him cumming inside of you - ironically enough.

"I promised that I'll always protect you and our children. I'll always protect you and Jin-Seon." Jungkook squeezes your hand gently. "He was conceived that same night. Out of love, Y/N. I know you don't love me and I'm alright with that. But we made Jin-Seon out of love, didn't we?"

As creepy as it was, Jungkook had always tracked your periods. Realizing Jin-Seon's existence had Jungkook calculating the months you've been pregnant back to the night in Greece - that wasn't the bedding ceremony he wished he didn't participate in.

Jungkook was in a dark place while you were gone that he only blames himself now when he thinks back to it. Days of hating you for leaving him, turned into delusion - that you'd come back on your own free will. He distanced himself from his Hyung's and only turned to drinking as a way to cope with your absence. He had no real desire for any of the women at the Brothel unless he was intoxicated, his mind telling him that he was being intimate with you. But, it never lasted long - they didn't moan the way you did or touch him the same. They weren't you - and even he wishes he could retract the harsh treatment he displayed towards them.

"Yes." you nod. It was distressing to think of your feelings towards Jungkook. You wanted to hate him for what he forced you into, but you couldn't. He didn't lock you away in a dungeon and forced you to do anything. He never threatened your family and you're forever grateful that he assisted them - even after you left.

A knock sounds on the door and Jungkook releases one of your hands, only holding one. It does so to see if you'd remove your hand from his, and when you don't he decides it was safe to hold you.

"Can I come in?" Ren questions, poking her head in. She gives you and Jungkook a warm smile, glancing at your connected hands. As long as she worked with Jungkook - since he was a child at the age of 13 - it was heartfelt to see the man grown into his own person and not the man his father wanted him to be.

Ren takes a seat at her desk. "I assume the two of you talked?"

You and Jungkook nodded.

"I'm glad to see this." Ren admits. "Though I am not certain of Jungkook's past actions..." Ren glances at the man. "...I can say he is changing for the better. Not only for himself, but for you and your son."

You believed Ren.

"Before we wrap today's session up. I feel as though the two of you should experience normal couple activities."

"What do you mean?" Jungkook tilts his head.

"Y/N and you never had the chance to become a couple. It was thrusted into her, correct?"

Jungkook nods nerevously, glancing at you.

"And now you two are parents and live, breathe, sleep Jin-Seon. That's how it's supposed to be." Ren assures, not wanting to offend both young parents. "However, maybe just a night with just you and Y/N alone. You two can truly talk to one another."

"Like a date?" you inquire. "I don't think we've ever been on one."

Jungkook goes to protest, but stops himself. He tries to rack his brain for all the activities you and him had done - and yet he couldn't find any. You accompanied him to many dinner parties with the rest of his Hyungs prior to Jin-Seon - and even after. You and him ate out occassionally, yet Jin-Seon was always by your side and though neither of you ever minded, it wasn't a date.

Jungkook licks his lips - now he felt shitty.

"Like a date." Ren nods, she holds back laughter. A date was foreign to the two of you - and you were already married with a child. "You're young and still overly attractive. Live life - I promise Jin-Seon isn't going to be harmed if you left for one night."

Jungkook turns to look at you, catching your eyes.

"It won't be easy. By what you tell me, he's attached to you by the hip." Ren leans back into her chair. "But he's a baby and no matter how young, children can feel whatever their parents feel. If he senses that you two aren't loving one another, as he grows, he'll begin to blame himself."

Jungkook grips your hand at this. He never wants Jin-Seon to feel what he's felt as a child - wondering if his father ever loved his mother. He could never look at his father the same way - even at a young age - after he's physically, mentally and verbally assaulted his mother.

"Okay." you nod, gently squeezing Jungkooks hand.

"Okay." Jungkook repeats your word, offering the same nod. He glances your way, ears flushing red. "Y/N will you go on a date with me?"

"You're embarrassing." You snort and this causes Ren to laugh, yet you couldn't stop your heart from beating out your chest.

"Who is she?" asks Taehyung as his gloved hands open your laptop screen. It lights up and music plays from it - you must've been in a rush this morning.

"Just some girl." Jungkook responds. He glances around your apartment - it was small, but you were one person. You were one to appreciate pictures - there were many littering your walls. The home appeared cozy - you had little knick knacks here and there as decoration and a few candles, some used.

Taehyung snickers. "You wouldn't be asking me to hack into her devices if she was just some girl." the man says, clicking on the keys of your laptop.

Jungkook rolls his eyes. He doesn't have to explain anything to Taehyung - especially when his work with you wasn't done. Hyun-woo had just been arrested not long ago and he was sure you were going through it - your savings money to bail his out of jail down the drain.

"Is this girl the one you've been following?" Taehyung questions. "I'm almost done transfering."

"You're asking a lot of questions, Hyung." Jungkook retorts. He looks at his watch - you'll be home in another hour. It was Thursday and on Thursdays you don't stay late at work - you usually came home and relaxed before your double shift the following day.

"Of course I am." Taehyung snickers. "My dongsaeng never shows interest in women if it isn't a quick fuck." Taehyung closes your laptop. He stands straighter to eye Jungkook. "I know she isn't a quick fuck."

Taehyung watches Jungkook's reaction. "You're right." Jungkook nods. "I never fucked her."

"Oh?" Taehyung's amused now. "She must be special." Taehyung glances around the apartment. It was hard trying to find who this girl was - the pictures littering the walls had different faces in each. "What does she look like?"

"Does it matter?" Jungkook steps in Taehyung's line of vision. "We need to go. She'll be home soon."

Taehyung snorts. "You know when she comes home? You must really like her."

Taehyung was only teasing. It was refreshing to see Jungkook interested in a woman - he was the youngest and went through a phase with Jungkook fucking anything that was willing. He didn't need to find one woman to settle down with - Jimin had two. Still, he was young and only 24 years old. No 24 year old neccessarily needs to settle down and get married, yet their line of business never guaranteed you'd live another day.

Jungkook makes his way towards his own car and gets inside. He looks through his phone - the new one Taehyung has programmed. He was able to see just what was on your phone - pictures, emails, messages and all. He first goes through your search history in hopes to find what exactly you enjoyed. He didn't find much - only a few bills that were past due. Your electric was due to be disconnected soon if you didn't pay it - you got paid on Tuesdays, meaning you'd be without electric for days before you can pay it.

Jungkook uses his credit card to pay for the past due bills and exits the internet. He goes through your pictures - you're cute. You take a lot of selfies that you never post anywhere, your social media being dry as can be. You have a few memes saved, some full body pictures that he stares at for too long and some pictures of your family members - mainly children.

Jungkook scowers your phone and reaches your messages. You didn't have a lot of friends - if he can call them that. He would call them acquaintances. You don't hang out with anyone special - nor were you dating anyone. Jungkook would've known, but you being as introverted as you were was good. He'd even say great. It made everything he was planning easier. An introverted person didn't have people looking for them.

Jungkook leans back into his seat and goes through your pictures again opening and closing different folders and albums - at this point he was just being intrusive. He comes across a hidden folder and it's as if he hit the jackpot.

You were introverted, yes, but that didn't mean you were overly shy. These pictures he found must've been ones you kept to yourself - you in just your underwear posing for the camera, some of your body naked, others in lingerie. It makes Jungkook's throat dry and he understands that this was the ultimate invasion of privacy. However, he doesn't stop himself from scrolling and zooming in on pictures.

Your skin is soft - it has to be. The curves in your body were like a work of art and Jungkook regrets unbuttoning his jeans and stroking himself to your pictures. He's glad his windows were tinted and no one could see just how perverted he was being.

Jungkook's panting - hands gripping his cock as his eyes trail the way your breast appears in the selfie you took. It wasn't much - yet he could see the thin line of yor underwear peaking through the bottom of it, and it was enough for him to imagine the way your ass was - how soft it cold be, how gripable it was and the sound it'd make if he was fucking into you...

The disgust came instantly after Jungkook cums into his hands. He wasn't some teenager seeing a naked woman for the first time, yet he acted out of pure lust. He turns off the phone and throws it into the passenger seat and rummages through the glove department to find a napkin to wipe his hands. Just as he's done, his phone begins to ring from his suit pocket. 

"Speak." Jungkook sighs into his phone as he answers it. 

"Jeon-ssi." the deep voice of Seung-hyun says over the phone. "It's done."

"Is it?" Jungkook starts his car. "Did you touch her?"

"No." Seung-hyun insists. "She was frightened, however."

Of course you were frightened having men in dark suits come to your work place and look for your brother. It was bound to happen, though. You were lucky that Hyun-woo had got his product from Bangtan - they were less vicious than most. Jungkook had no intentions of harming you or your family members. He'd admit that Sehun was once a person of interest being Hyun-woo's younger brother - but witnessing the man play in his yard with both of his sons has Jungkook going against his decision. 

"Alright." Jungkook pulls out and begins to drive. "Tonight I want you and Daesung to go to her home. I've sent you the address already. Bring Ji-Yong with you." Jungkook clenches the steering wheel. "Scare her. Break anything that doesn't appear personal. Don't harm any of her pictures or devices - and don't put your hands on her either."

"Yes, Jeon-ssi." Seung-hyun responds. "Is there anything else you need for us to do?"

"Yes. Inform her of Hyun-woo's debt and tell her she has a week to come up with the debt amount."

Hoseok hands Jin-Seon his phone and the boy takes it without a second thought. Jimin frowns when he drops the teddy bear he has given him not even five minutes prior. He sends a glare at Hoseok who now has Jin-Seon sitting in his lap and the boy happily opens and closes apps.

Jungkook had called all 6 of his Hyungs for help - claiming it was an emergency. The emergency being that one of them needed to babysit Jin-Seon for a few hours while he and you went on a date.

Jin was the first to come and soon gave up. He tried to take Jin-Seon - who was seated in Jungkook's lap - but the boy did nothing but scream and squirm in his arms. Namjoon came soon after and eased his way closer to Jin-Seon, but he does nothing but clench Jungkook's shirt.

Yoongi manages to hold Jin-Seon, lightly bouncing him on his leg until you walked in to check on him - which Jin-Seon now realized he'd rather be with both parents and not the uncles he pretends to not know.

Taehyung is successful in distracting Jin-Seon - he brings his son who's only about three. Jin-Seon follows around the older boy but as soon as Jungkook and you attempt to make a run for it, Jin-Seon is running after the two of you and whimpers.

"Do you wanna come with me?" Hoseok coos, wrapping Jin-Seon into a hug.

"Cheater." Jimin huffs, crossing his arms.

Jin-Seon's eyes lift and he trails them around. The boy begins to cry and squirm out of Hoseok's arms when he doesn't see the familiar faces of his parents - who are halfway out the door when he screams. He throws Hoseok's phone roughly onto the marble floor - receiving a laugh from Jimin - and attempts to run around to look for the two of you.

"Maybe you two should just go and we'll all just stay with him." Yoongi suggests. He's never met a child so attached to their parents and it was visible that Jin-Seon would never allow you and Jungkook to leave his side.

Jungkook pokes his head into the sitting room and feels terrible at his distressed son. Jin-Seon comes running as fast as his legs could and clenches Jungkook's pants. He turns back to look at his uncles and cries louder.

"You'd think we're strangers the way he's crying." Jin shakes his head. He was his father's son - Jungkook was just as dramatic when he was young.

"He's terrified." Taehyung brings his own son into his lap as he sits down. "Remember when Kookie was terrified of balloons when he was that age?"

Jungkook picks up Jin-Seon and sends a glare towards Taehyung.

"And Joon and Hobi would always shove them in his face? How could I forget?" Jin laughs aloud.

"Funny." Jungkook says dryly. "You all are useless."

"We can put him to bed a little early." you suggest. You come behind Jungkook and smile at Jin-Seon. He has his head resting on Jungkook's shoulder and refuses to look at the men in his home.

Jimin leans back. "As beautiful as always, Y/N." he smiles to you and you return it nervously.

"No wonder Jin-Seon doesn't like you. You flirt with his mother." Taehyung furrows a brow.

"As if he doesn't have two wives already." Namjoon jokes.

Jungkook's jaw clenches but he chooses to ignore his Hyungs. He turns to go down the hall to the bedroom.

"Yoongi-ah," Jin claps his hands. "let's cook."

"For what?" Yoongi groans. He leans back lazily.

"That spoiled child is never going to let his parents leave the home without him." Namjoon snorts. "It's like a radar goes off in his head when they're a foot out the door."

"Are you suggesting we bring the date to them?" Jimin tilts his head. "How kind of us."

"Run a criminal empire during the day and organize dates at night." Taehyung sighs and stands. "You wanna help us cook?" he leans down to his son.

"You're not cooking." Jin scoffs. "Go set up the table."

Jin-Seon still doesn't prefer to sleep in his own bed - doesn't matter if the walls are decorated with many different super heroes he enjoys watching (even if he doesn't know what's going on), he has a large twin size bed to himself with the softest sheets and stuff animals, a large tv hanging from the wall with a mood lamp that changes colors and even sings soft lullybies. Not including the toys you and Jungkook bought for him plus gifts - it was truly like a play palace that you'd without a doubt sleep in - Jin-Seon couldn't be bothered with it.

Jungkook opens the door and allows you to walk through first. You remove your heels and make your way towards the bed. The dress you wore rises up as you lay down and Jungkook peaks - just a little - at the exposed flesh of your inner thigh. But, neither of you were here for that. Jin-Seon places himself in the middle once Jungkook lies down.

You quietly laugh at your son. He knew just what to do to get his way and each time Jungkook and you fallen victim to such behavior.

Jin-Seon snuggles closer to you, back against your chest. His hand reaches out for Jungkook, who comes closer to him. Jin-Seon's tiny hand places themselves on Jungkook's chest and he closes his eyes.

"I don't think we're going to make those reservations." Jungkook murmur after a while. Jin-Seon's grip on his dress shirt loosens.

"I know." you snuggle into Jin-Seon's hair and inhale. "It's hard being away from him."

"It is." Jungkook agrees.

Jin-Seon could never annoy him with his attachment to Jungkook. He was just as attached to his son (and you) as his son was to him. It's an act he wishes he could have experienced with his own father - yet he doesn't dwell on the lack of relationship with the man. He was abusive to not only his mother, but his children. He could never harm you - in general - but especially not in the view of his son.

"It feels nice." Jungkook murmurs. His finger gently rubs Jin-Seon's cheeks. "Knowing that he loves us so much. I hope it never fades."

"As long as we love him just as much," your hand rubs Jin-Seon's hair softly. "it never will. Before we know it he'll be a moody teenager."

Jungkook groans. "I dread that happening. I was terrible." he shakes his head at the memory. "I can't wait when he starts school and joins clubs. I never got the chance to."

"Why not?" you murmur a response, still rubbing Jin-Seon's hair.

Jungkook removes his finger from Jin-Seon's cheek. "My father." was his only response and you understand it completely. "If it didn't concern the business he wasn't interested in it."

You listen to Jungkook speak - getting more insight to his childhood has you comprehending the man he became because of it.

"My mother always came to whatever I was interested in at the time." Jungkook continues. "Yet, a boy always wants his father there, too. I dropped out of many things because he said it was a nuisance. I realized to get my father to notice me was become involved with Bangtan much earlier than intended."

You swallow the truth. Your mind knows that Jin-Seon is expected to do the same - to become the same as Jungkook and the rest of them. You would eventually have no say in it - no matter how much it makes your heart ache.

"He told me he was proud of me for the first time when I shot a man right in the head. He was tied up and gagged and one of my fathers rivals." Jungkook's words are emotionless but your eyes widen at them, a gasp releasing from your lips. "I threw up afterwards. I was only 10." Jungkook snickers - not because it's funny, but the fact that his father showed actual interest in his was when he held a gun in his hands.

You're stunned - too much to respond. It makes you hold Jin-Seon closer to you.

"My father never dealt drugs on the street, he had men for that. All of the elites in Bangtan did - yet he insisted I learn how to count products in case one of my men shorted me. I got off of cocaine for the first time at the age of 13 - by accident. I thought I was going to die." Jungkook lets out a humorous laugh.

"I - that's not funny!" you hiss lowly to him. You're unsure how to process all of this new information.

"Laughing is a coping mechanism." Jungkook leans closer and presses a kiss onto Jin-Seon's forehead. "I've watched my father abuse my mother for years before I've done something about it."

You process his words, eyes narrowing at him. You're afraid to ask what he means, but deep down Jungkook recognizes the glint in your eyes. You know what he's saying - just afraid to ask further detail.

"I was done sitting around allowing my father to hurt my mother."

"You don't have to tell me." you quickly quip. You're holding onto Jin-Seon close to you - so close that you're surprised he hasn't stirred awake.

"I don't want there to be any secrets with us." Jungkook comes closer to you. He's reaching to see how far you're willing to let him touch you. He wraps his arm around you, Jin-Seon snuggling into his chest. "I told you my father has died but I didn't tell you that I killed him."

You're face to face with Jungkook, Jin-Seon sleeping soundly between the two of you.

"I shot him with the gun he gifted me on my 15th birthday." Jungkook's hand lift to touch your cheek - you don't flinch like he initially expected. "I'd want Jin-Seon to do the same."

You knit your brows.

"Don't look like that." Jungkook chuckles. "I'm not saying I want to die by his hands." Jungkook's thumb rubs your cheek. He's glad to have you and Jin-Seon so close to him - it makes his heart feel warm. "What I am saying, if I ever become my father and abuse my wife and son," Jungkook doesn't blink, dark eyes staring into you. "I want our son to protect you. Even if it's from me."

Jungkook has eyes on you at all times - mostly his own. It's unfortunate that you have to sell your belongings to get your own brother out of debt - but of course you do it.

Jungkook admires you. He knows you've cried for hours - he sees so on the camera he's hacked onto your laptop and phone. Yet, you refuse to dwell on your unlucky life now. You got to work quickly - selling your belongings in hopes of getting any amount of money for them. You stressed yourself out with work - staying long past your time to clock out.

You'd never make up for the price. Jungkook has assured that you'd never would - which is why he set such a high amount. Hyun-woo owed him money, however not the price he set.

Was it sadistic? To watch idly as you sold your belongings and overworked yourself? Maybe - yet this was part of his plan to have you. Eventually you'd have to give up and give into him.

First, he had to tempt you into joining the Underground Black Market by sending suggestive ads to your devices. All you had to do now was take the hint - and you did.

The Underground Black Market wasn't for outsiders or the public. It was an organization strictly for mafia families - Bangtan being heavily invested into it. Those around the world participated in said Black Market - Jungkook himself travelled from Thailand all the way to Mexico for said Black Markets.

Jungkook himself is unsure what you have to sell - but whatever it was, he was bringing an insane amount of cash to buy it. Even if yo got your ass on the stage and sold a gallon of milk - as comical as it could be - he'd buy it. It was all apart of his plan, after all.

"Knock, knock,"

Jungkook glances upwards and catches eyes with Jimin who walks right into his office. Jungkook leans forward, elbows on his desk. "Yes?"

"Is that how you greet people?" Jimin rolls his eyes.

"I'm busy." Jungkook glances away from Jimin and back down to his phone.

"Stalking that little girl?" Jimin scoffs. He sits down across from Jungkook and crosses his legs. "Is she cute?"

Jungkook takes a deep breath.

"She must be if you're doing all of this mess." Jimin giggles. "Have you fucked her?"

"Shut up." Jungkook groans, throwing the phone onto the table. "That's private."

Jimin is taken aback, but soon he's sporting a wide smile. "Oh." he hums.

"Oh?" Jungkook snaps his head to Jimin to furrow a brow. "What the hell do you mean 'Oh'?"

"You never touched her." Jimin's tone comes out teasingly. "You would've told me if you did."

"I'm not having this conversation." Jungkook's ears are turning red. "I have somewhere to be in an hour."

"This late?" Jimin questions. "Black Market this year doesn't seem promising."

How wrong Jimin was. It was very promising.

Jimin had insisted on accompanying Jungkook to the Black Market event. They sat front and center and Jimin fought back dozing off one too many times. He had nothing to buy and by the looks of it, neither did Jungkook.

The last category is what always catches any man's attention - the sex. Women always found their way to these in hopes of getting into the beds of powerful men. Jimin always made his attention conscious at this time - in case there were any women needed for the Brothel; for a price, of course.

Jungkook eyes catches you and his heart's pumping outside his chest. He feels himself stiffened and his mouth loses any moisture. You were beautiful - a true sight to behold. You appeared frightened to walk on stage in nothing but lingerie - cheap, he can tell, but enough to make him want you right then and there. You're nervous and by your facial features he notes you're uncomfortable to be in front of so many men.

You were selling sex; this is how desperate you've come to be to pay of Hyun-woo's debt.

You were right where Jungkook wanted (and needed) you to be.

Jimin snorts. "64 million won for some pussy?" he shakes his head. He was looking (respectfully) into looking if you were willing to be apart of the Brothel - you had the perfect fit, just needed a little bit more confidence.

""I'm not just selling sex." you speak into the microphone, the sea of people watching you making your stomach feel uneasy. "I'm selling my virginity."

Jimin widened his eyes - now that was different. A virgin in a sea of powerful men with a superiority complex - more hands went up at the new fact. "She's cute." Jimin whispers to Jungkook. "Should I-"

"No." Jungkook hisses.

Jimin pouts his lips, but decides to sit this one out.

One man offered 64 million straight out, his old shaky voice cracking. You were visibly disgusted, but kept your smile on your lips - Jungkook snorts. Another man shouted 65, the next 70.

Clearing his throat, Jungkook loudly declares, "400 million won."

Jimin snaps his head to Jungkook with wide eyes, then back at you. A light bulb flashes above his head and he's giggling to himself.

"Cash." Jungkook steps forward, eyes locking with you.

"Is this the girl you're-"

"Not now." Jungkook doesn't break eye contact with you.

"Sold!" the host says, head shaking in disbelief at the amount of money you were about to obtain for your virginity. You watch Jungkook make his way to the stage, all the while he's also watching you. You're captivated by him, completely stunned - he can tell. Maybe it was because of how young he was unlike the other men who want nothing but to take advantage of your innoncence.

Jungkook grasps your jacket and places it upon your shoulder. He pushes you gentle towards the left side of the stage and down the small stairs. The two of you needed to talk about the new found contract you're in.

You two had a lot to talk about. You marveled at the amount of cash he takes out of the black bag - the exact amount you needed to get Hyun-woo out of debt. He was serious about paying you for your time - at least that's what he wants you to believe. 64 million won was nothing but pocket change to him and handing it over to you wasn't anything he'd think twice about. 

Your fidgeting doesn't go unnoticed - you were intimidated. You were confused, and rightfully so. He was not a man that needed to buy pussy - he had pussy all around him. hat intrigued him more about you was not that you were selling sex - but selling your virginity for your brother's debt. It makes something in him want you more now - how selfless you were to help the ones you love. 

"Before we...make out a contract. Why are you doing this?" Jungkook asks you. He has taken you to his car, a black mercedes with dark tinted windows. You two sit in the back while one of his men drives the two of you - Jimin long gone.

"I need the money." you admit. He knows. 

"64 million won is a lot of money to need." Jungkook chuckles a response. "College? Mortage?" He watches your eyes glance around shyly.

"My brother's in debt." you say. Jungkook feigns ignorance.

Jungkook listens to you go into detail about everything that transpires. You were utterly exhausted - overworking yourself to pay your bills and deal with Hyun-woo's debt. You are nearing tears when you tell him of his men destroying your house and only allowing you a week to conjure the debt money - Jungkook feels a sting in his heart at your words and admission of how scared you were. You thought they'd come to kill you, and now Jungkook feels terrible about putting you in that position.

"I've sold nearly everything I could to pay off his debts." Jungkook hears the words come from your lips. "All I have left is my dignity and my virginity." you snicker.

"Do you hate him?" Jungkook questions. "For...doing this to you?"

Jungkook waits as you think a response, but it comes quicker than he expects. 

"No." you shake your head. "I can never hate Hyun-woo. He's my brother."

"He got you into this mess." Jungkook states. "You just admitted to being scared for your life."

You nod at him, and Jungkook feels his heart tighten when you give him a smile - a sad one - but a smile nonetheless. "I'd never give up on the ones I love."

The rest of the car ride remained in silence. Jungkook thinks of your words - how vulnerable you were left taking care of Hyun-woo. However, he understands you're the perfect woman for him, now more than ever. You're determination to get Hyun-woo out of debt with what little you have and Jungkook's positive that the woman he needs is a woman like you. 

"Here," Jungkook hands you a bag with the exact amount. "64 million won."

Your eyes widen.

"I'll come back to give you the rest." Jungkook ensures. 

"I-I...you don't need me to do anything for you now?" you ask. You're so pure and it's killing him. Just the thought of you doing anything for him in the car is enough to make his pants feel clasphobic. "I only need 64 million won - no more. You can come in and-"

Jungkook takes a deep breath. "I'll be back." Jungkook nods. "Pay your brothers debts."

You get out of the car and turn to him. You bow. "Thank you." you murmur. You lift yourself up to look at him, a soft grin on your lips. "I promise to be the best I can be for you."

Jungkook doesn't dount that, he licks his lips and watches as you stroll into your home. 

You jolt awake at the sound of knocking on the door, as does Jungkook. He checks on Jin-Seon before gently disconnecting himself from his son and you. You watch groggily as Jungkook makes his way to the bedroom. He opens it and frowns at the wide smiles of Jimin and Taehyung.

"Kookie!" Taehyung quietly cheers. "Han-jae's asleep in Jin-Seon's room."

"That's fine." Jungkook yawns. "At least someone is."

"But," Jimin claps his hands together - again, quietly to not wake Jin-Seon. "we need you and Y/N to come with us. It's important."

Jungkook turns to see you already looking towards them. Jungkook sighs. "She's resting with Jin-Seon. Is it actually important or are you-"

"Can you stop bitching and come with us?" Taehyung snaps. "Shit."

"Fuck off." Jungkook closes the door and Taehyung has the urge to kick it down, but for his nephew's sake he doesn't.

Jungkook makes his way towards your side. He looks down at you just as you untangle yourself from Jin-Seon. "What do you think they need?" you ask.

"Not sure." Jungkook leans down and puts a hand on Jin-Seon's head. "We can go check it out if you're not tired. If you are I'll go alone."

You shake your head. "I'll go." you give Jin-Seon a quick peck on his forehead.

Jungkook follows you out of the room, silently closing the door. He hears commotion coming from down the hall and already wants to throw everyone out of his home. He turns the corner with you and comes face first to his Hyungs.

"Finally." Yoongi groans.

"You're all still here." Jungkook deadpans. "Why?"

"You're rude." Namjoon crosses. "After everything we did for you."

"All you did was make the table." Hoseok laughs.

"What are you talking about?" Jungkook makes his way towards the kitchen where he smells food.

"Kook-ah!" Jin comes closer. He's wearing an apron around his chest. "And Y/N-ie. Welcome to the best resturant Korea can offer you."

You can't stop yourself from smiling. The kitchen had been transformed - where they got the round table, you're unsure, however the chairs come from the large dining area. Theres a white table cloth covering the table - a vase in the middle with an array of flowers. "Did you take these from the garden?" you ask no one in particular.

"Uh..." Hoseok stammers.

"I hope you don't mind. It's too late to get flowers elsewhere." Namjoon scratches the back of his head nervously.

You turn to Jungkook.

"Simps." Jungkook murmurs, but he's flattered none the else. "What'd you cook?"

Jin hurridly grasps the finest china Jungkook owned - which weren't fine in the slighest - and begins serving you two.

"Sit down." Taehyung pushes you and Jungkook towards the table. "There's already appetizers on the table."

"Bread." you giggle, nodding your head. "Amazing appetizers."

Hoseok places two wine and collins glass down. Namjoon has a pitcher of water and pours it into the collins glass while Jimin pours red wine into the wine. Jungkook crosses his arms but he can't hide the satisfied smirk on his lips. "Thanks, maid." he nods to Jimin who gasps.

"I'll let that one slide." Jimin places the wine on the table.

Jin comes with two plates down onto the table before you. Jungkook leans back to release a laugh.

"Samgyeopsal." Jungkook claps his hands. "You all did this just for me? I'm flattered." Jungkook jokes. "And Y/N says us men in our profession can't be simps."

"I stand corrected." you take a sip of your wine. "Thank you for...all of this."

"You two are going to make me cry." Jin pats his heart. "Have fun, tonight. We'll be going."

"You aren't staying?" Jungkook furrows a brow.

"And intrude on your date? No." Hoseok shakes his head.

"Jin-Seon's asleep. Get drunk and have fun." Jimin winks his eyes aggressively. "Extra fun."

"The type of fun that makes babies." Taehyung pipes in.

"Maybe Jin-Seon wouldn't be such a cockblock if he had someone to play with." Yoongi jokes, and laughs erupt throghout the kitchen.

Jungkook's flushing, as are you. But you aren't upset with their jokes - it was thoughtful of them to do this for you and Jungkook.

"I'll go get Han-jae." Taehyung begins, but you shake your head.

"No, leave him." you insist. "You can get him tomorrow afternoon. He's already asleep."

Jungkook nods. "Jin-Seon and him would be happy to play together."

Taehyung claps his hands. "It's settled then. No taking it back."

Soon it's just you and Jungkook. It's quiet as you both eat, only making small talk. Jungkook's flattered that he had the chance to be with you - not the date he expected, but the date he'd remember the most.

"You look beautiful." Jungkook takes a sip of his water.

You snort. "Don't lie to me. I have bed hair and it probably marks all over my face from sleeping."

"I'd never lie to you about how I feel." Jungkook's eyes burn holes into you. "You're beautiful."

You look away. "Thank you."

Jungkook takes a bite of the pork belly. "Thank you for being my wife."

"You're becoming the so called simp you called Namjoon and Hoseok." you tease.

"I'll always be a simp for you." Jungkook lifts the wine glass in salute. "My beautiful wife."

"Are you already tipsy?"

"Maybe." Jungkook shrugs. "Thank you for giving me Jin-Seon." Jungkook gulps down the rest of his wine.

"Drink some water. A glass of wine shouldn't be getting you this hype."

"I don't have to be drunk to shower you with compliments." Jungkook rolls his eyes. "Here," Jungkook grabs the wine to pour some more for the both of you. "A toast to..." Jungkook hums.

"To us." you quip, raising your class to click against his. 

Jungkook's lips curl upwards until he's beaming, bunny teeth on display. "To us." he repeats.

Jungkook takes a gulp of his wine, realizing that this date with you would be the date he'd remember until the end of time. It wasn't about how extravagant it was or how much money he spent to fund the date - it was about you and him; together. You smiled at him - a smile that appears genuine, like you wanted to be there. The two of you laughed and joked as if nothing had ever come between you.

"Thank you." Jungkook says again - he had 4 glasses of wine already and he's feeling it. 

You're on your third - only taking a sip of it - the food had long finished and now all Jungkook and you had done was drink and laugh - him occasionally sending flirty comments your way. But he couldn't help himself - especially not the way you're dressed. You appeared completely edible now - and he would do anything to taste you again. 

"What are you thanking me for now?" you question amused. 

"For being my wife." Jungkook shrugs. "For giving birth to our son."

"You already said that."

"Right." Jungkook chuckles. "For...forgiving me. Little by little. Thank you."

"I can't keep spinning you Hye-Jinnie." Jungkook laughs, giving the small girl another spin before placing her on the ground. "But I promise I'll be back."

Hye-Jin frowns, nearly falling from being dizzy. "Do you promise?" she asks, curly strands falling into her eyes.

Namjoon shakes his head, stepping behind his daughter. "If he breaks his promise he has to buy you ice cream."

"The one with cotton candy and sprinkles." Hye-Jin smirks mischeviously at Jungkook who could only laugh.

Hye-Jin makes her way out of Namjoon's office. His daughter was never usually allowed inside, only visiting when she realized Jungkook was over - someone who is considered a "big kid" to play with and also a jungle gym to climb on.

"You're the only parent I know who condones ice cream and candy everyday." Jungkook snorts.

"When you have children you'll understand how difficult it is to say no to them." Namjoon leans against his desk, arms crossed. "Let's talk about why you're really here, Kookie."

Jungkook nods his head. "I need help. More like back-up."

Namjoon waits for Jungkook to continue.

"I can't tell you anything now - I'd rather wait until the rest of us are together." Jungkook glances at Namjoon, waiting for a reaction. Namjoon was one of his Hyungs that wasn't afraid to tell him about himself (he appreciated it at times, sometimes not so much) and he'd rather not hear it.

Namjoon hums. "Does this have something to do with that girl you've been stalking?"

Jungkook snaps his head to Namjoon. "I wouldn't call it stalking." he retorts. "I was-"

"Taehyung says you had him hack her devices." Namjoon interrupts. "Do you know this girl personally or is she just your latest lay?"

"Tell Taehyung he can fuck off." Jungkook hisses. "If you aren't going to help me, Hyung, I'll go to Jin-hyung. Matter of fact - Noona will be better." Jungkook could never forget the way his Hyung's wife freely took down multiple mafia families and had Bangtan become higher than they once were.

Namjoon rolls his eyes. Jungkook was always overly sensitive and overly dramatic. Jin allowed Jungkook to do whatever he wanted without any type of consequences - regardless of how Jungkook acted. When it came to Namjoon's own wife - who is fully capable of doing whatever Jungkook requested without a blink of an eye - but she was a changed woman and he'd rather not have her go back to those days.

"I'll help you in whatever you need." Namjoon states. "Are we taking your car?"

"It's not like you have your own." Jungkook smirks, releasing a loud laugh when Namjoon's face remains stoic.

The ride to wherever Jungkook was taking him was silent. Namjoon notes that whatever Jungkook was thinking, it weighs heavily on his mind. He doesn't understand much of the woman Jungkook was infatuated with, only being told that she was being watched by him almost daily.

It's a weird sight that Namjoon needed to get accustomed to. Jungkook was the last of them to be wed - only using woman for sex and nothing else. He managed to ignore any meeting Bangtan had to offer with him being married and producing a heir - and yes, he was young and had some time, yet tomorrow is never promised in their career choice.

The car stops right in front of an apartment. Namjoon opens the door, a gun on his hip. Jungkook slams the door behind him and strolls towards the first apartment. Namjoon follows behind him and nearly slams into Jungkook when he suddenly stops. "Trust me on this, Hyung." Jungkook murmurs before he turns and slams the door open.

Namjoon draws his gun just as Jungkook does. His eyes land on three men inside the small apartment and one woman - eyes wide with confusion and fear. He recognizes these men - Daesung, Ji-Yong and Seung-hyun, all men who worked for Bangtan and directly under Jungkook.

"What the hell?" Daesung to the intruders, arms raised. His eyes widen in realization. "Jeon-ssi? What are you doing-"

Jungkook pulls the trigger and hits Daesung right on the shoulder. Daesung screams as he hits the floor - another shot rings and Jungkook shoots Daesung through his head. Namjoon is next to shoot Ji-Yong, who's arm raised ready to shoot. Taking Seung-hyun down wasn't an issue. Namjoon eyes the way Jungkook begins to saunter to you, stepping over the dead and bleeding bodies.

Namjoon releases a sigh, taking out his phone. He sends a text to Hoseok with his current location - cleaning up this mess was going to require a specific team of people. Jungkook had some explaining to do - Namjoon didn't like being left in the dark. Jungkook was his brother, and he'd choose him before any of the low class men, however, killing off their men doesn't do anything for them but cause chaos and skepitism.

Namjoon doesn't do anything but watch as you cry on the floor, Jungkook tangling his fingers in your hair and yanking you up. He doesn't like to see your tears and eyes - displaying nothing but pure terror. He wonders how much you know of Jungkook - if you do at all.

"P-Please..." you begged, trying to break away from Jungkook's hands.

Namjoon puts his gun back onto his hip just as Jungkook untangles his hands from your hair and take a step back. "Stop crying." he murmurs. "I'm not going to kill you."

Namjoon holds back a scoff. You're sniffling, and he doesn't blame you. Jungkook and him had come into your home and killed three men - that were extorting you, sure, but Namjoon knows well enough that Jungkook's plan was deeper than what he was telling him.

"That's it." Jungkook nods, a smile on his lips. He reaches out to wipe a tear from your left eye. His hand then caresses your cheek. "I can't believe these cowards left you in such a compromising position."

Namjoon raises his brows. His eyes glance down to the bodies, blood seeping through the hardwood floor and the carpet rug you had near your couch. Jungkook's plan - at least a section of it - was to appear like a hero in your eyes.

You gulp, shaking stiffly.

"Come." Jungkook says.

"W-Where are you taking me?" you cry out when you feel Jungkook grab your shoulders and bring you closer to him. Namjoon sighs - Jungkook could never take no for an answer, or read the room that you were visibly upset. Yet, he couldn't blame the boy, at his age he was possibly the same way in the eyes of his Hyungs. "I-I don't need the money anymore, take it-"

"Hyung, please wait in the car for us." Jungkook tells him.

Namjoon does, not say another word. He closes the door behind him and makes his way back to the car. He sits in the passenger seat and releases a sigh.

"You...fear me." Jungkook says to you. "After I got you out of debt and handled the men who disrespected you?" Jungkook isn't offended, of course. He understands that you have the right to fear him - he barged into your home and murdered three of his men (unbeknownst to you) right in front of your face.

You want to scream and cry, everything at once. You were beyond frightened and you swore if you could piss right now, you would.

You remain still when Jungkook brings himself closer to you. "Let's go home, Y/N." he tells you sternly, the look in his eyes telling you that he wasn't going to say it again. He's glad when you don't fight him, allowing his to wrap his arms around your shoulders and bring you out to the car. He opens the back door, making sure to add the child lock in case you had the idea to jump out.

Jungkook enters the car and begins to drive, his eyes glancing at the rearview mirror to look at you, Your cheks were tear stained and you were shuddering, but Jungkook vows that he'll give you a good life starting now. You wouldn't have to work a day of your life anymore, nor would you have to deal with Hyun-woo's addiction and theft wrapping itself into your life. 

Jungkook squeezes the steering wheel. He'll give you the life you and him deserve - together. 

Jungkook presses his lips upon yours, hands roaming up up your thighs. He doesn't care that the kitchen's now a mess, the left over food with plates and glasses on the floor. What he does care about is you - touching you, kissing you.

Your breath hitched when your lips are released from his. Jungkook kisses your neck needily, inhaling your sweet scent. It's been too long - so long since he's last touched you. Not since that day nearing two years with the bedding ceremony.

Jungkook couldn't help but nibble against your skin, soon sucking along it. He missed being intimate with you but he only has himselt to blame why it took this long.

"I need to taste you." Jungkook huffs, hands squeezing your thighs. "I need to taste you, Y/N. Let me make you cum again...it's been so long."

You're nodding your head. Maybe it was the wine you and Jungkook had downed that has the both of you needy and horny for one another. Deep down, both of you know this is wrong. You shouldn't be intimate with one another while tipsy.

But it felt too good to stop.

Jungkook's whimpers and dirty talks always got to you. The way he easily wants to pleasure you without anything in return was always a turn on - it's the reason you always wanted him.

"W-What if Jin-Seon wakes up?" you ask, more yourself then him.

Jungkook kisses your collarbone. "He never wakes through the night." and you know this - you're trying your best to resist him, but you can't.

Jungkook's hands push between your legs, swiping along your clothed clit. He shudders, as do you, at the moist touch. He'd longed for you for far too long. He rubs along your clit, giving wet kisses on your collarbone and breast.

"You're so beautiful, Y/N." Jungkook groans painfully. He doesn't stop rubbing your clit, managing to slide your panties to the side to rub harder. He gives quick bites along your breast. "You smell so good and I know you taste just as good."

You flutter your eyes open just as Jungkook enters two of his fingers inside his mouth and releases a moan. You bite your lip, eyes finding Jungkook's. "Let me make you cum, baby." Jungkook pleads.

"Okay." you nod, and without a second thought Jungkook's tugging your panties off.

Jungkook dives right into your pussy, tongue flat against your clit. He's sucking as though he hadn't already eaten, moaning just as loud as you were. His sole purpose now was to make you cum - not expecting anything from you in return.

Your hands grip Jungkook's hair and your eyes can't remove themselves from the familiarly filthy scene of Jungkook between your legs. His eyes glance up to look at you, eyes filled with the same lust you had in yours.

"I'm going to cum." you cough out, head leaning back and eyes fluttering close.

Jungkook lifts himself from your clit - glistening in the light. He enters two fingers inside of you, pumping them deeply. He reconnects his lips to your clit, bobbing his head side to side. Your hands squeeze his hair tightly, pushing him deeper into your clit as your high was reaching.

Jungkook couldn't stop himself from moaning into your clit. The grip you have on his hair sends goosebumps throughout his body - all you need to do now to satiate him was slap him like you've always done before.

Jungkook lifts from your clit just as you cum, his fingers covered in a mixture of your juices and you cum - he marvels at just how wet and beautiful you were.

"I need you to fuck me."

Jungkook grunts. "No." he swallows. "I should've had more self control. I don't want you to regret this."

You were positive you both were going to regret this. However, you were wet and the budlge in his pants didn't go unnoticed.

"Please." you open your eyes and plead with him.

Jungkook shakes his head, biting the inside of his cheek. "Y/N-"

You slap him across the face - hard. It echoes across the walls and nearly has Jungkook stumbling.

Jungkook's not ashamed to say it turns him on. The stinging in his cheek only makes his cock harder.

You slap him again, then again. When you were going to do it once more, Jungkook grasps your throat and places his lips upon yours. His free hand unbuckles his belt and throws his pants off.

"I don't have a condom." he stutters, tip of his cock so close to your entrance that he can feel the warmth radiating from it.

"You never did." you respond, reconnecting your lips. A condom was the last thing you were worrying about and all you truly wanted was for him to be inside of you. Your intoxicated actions would be dealt with when you were sober. 

Jungkook enters you. He's gasping - you're wet, warm and tight, just like he remembered. He takes a couple seconds to process the euphoric feeling before he begins to thrust. He starts at a delayed pace, feeling every bit of what your walls offer him - the blissfill sensation. "You feel so good." Jungkook quivers.

"You're going soft on me again?" you tease, but Jungkook hears the low hushed moan and you can't tease him with anything when you're enjoying what he's doing. "Simp." you fight back the smirk threatening to stretch upon your lips. 

"I'm suppose to simp over you." Jungkook places a hand on your outer thigh and scoots you closer to him. His other hand lays on your cheek. "You're my wife and the mother of my son." Jungkook thrusts deep inside of you, his pace starting up. 

You bite your lip. Your lack of sex life since you've left could be evident right about now. You're clenching tightly around him and your hand holds his that lays on your cheek. 

Jungkook thrusts into your harder and deeper, grunts releasing from his throat. He refuses to look away from you - it's a necessity that he remembers everything from this night - the way you taste, the way you feel. Even the way you came around him - he wanted to remember it all; he wasn't sure what the outcome would be when the both of you woke up the following morning. 

"You're-"

"If you call me beautiful again I'm going to slap you." you stammer. Jungkook's thrust were now powerful and it was challenging even trying to stay up without much help - but Jungkook had a firm grip on you.

Jungkook chuckles darkly. "-beautiful." he murmurs - only because he wants you to slap him. And when you do, his grip on your cheek tightens. "I missed the way you feel around me." Jungkook admits, yet it couldn't have been a secret to you. He leans closer to your lips, hovering a few centimeters above you. "I missed making you cum for me."

You connect your lips with his in a needy kiss. Your arms wrap around his neck to bring him even closer to you, cock only going deeper. You can feel the tension building up deep within you - you were going to cum, and Jungkook's words were just going to make you cum harder than what you needed to. 

Jungkook knows your body enough to know when you were going to cum. He disconnects his lips from yours and wraps a hand around your neck. "I want you to cum, baby." Jungkook murmurs. He quickens is pace, skin slapping echoing off the walls. "You always look so gorgeous when you cum for me."

"Shut up." you moan, clenching your eyes shut. 

"I've waited so long for you to cum around me again, baby." You're tightening around Jungkook even more as his thrust becomes sloppy.  He was close to cumming just as you were. 

Jungkook pulls out and cums along your thigh - he was tipsy, yet not enough to cum inside of you. He's unsure how you'd react the following day once the both of you sobered up. 

You nearly fell along the table if Jungkook didn't manage to catch you. You feel exhausted and haven't done anything but get fucked. "Tired?" Jungkook hums. 

You nod your head. 

"Let's get cleaned up then go to bed." Jungkook pushes you towards him to hop off of the table. 

"What about this mess?" you sigh. You're unsure how one thing got to another and you two left the kitchen this chaotic. 

Jungkook shrugs. "I'll deal with it tomorrow." he responds, pulling you with him.

You grab your discarded underwear and follow Jungkook towards your room to shower and sleep, far too exhausted to question anything that's just transpire.

You released everything you ate into the toilet, loud gagging noises could be heard. Jungkook had followed you after you ran from the breakfast table. His eyes widen at your figure, grabbing your hair to pull it back to ensure it doesn't get caught into the mess. 

"Get off of me." you hiss, slapping his hands away from you.

"Y/N-"

"Can you leave me alone?" you spit into the toilet, groaning at the way your mouth tastes. "You've done enough."

Jungkook doesn't respond. His eyes lower to the ground when he leaves the bathroom, making sure to close the door behind him. He sits onto the bed, eyes staring at the ground still. 

Even after a month and a half had gone by, his relationship with you has yet to change. The two of you had returned home and you managed to avoid him every chance you had. You didn't cuddle into him anymore and slept with your back facing him - Jungkook never touched you, afraid you'd flinch away from him. While he was at work, he constantly contemplated calling you, but he realized it'd go nowhere. 

Each morning the two of you ate breakfast silently, you never making eye contact with him. After the first week, Jungkook respected that you didn't want to talk to him now - but that didn't mean it made it easier. Dinner was just as silent and the home didn't feel warm anymore. 

Jungkook asked himself constantly if he went too far with the bedding ceremony. He sat through many bedding ceremonies with his Hyungs and watched half-heartidly and couldn't remember anything that went down besides quick sex. He told himself that eventually you'd come around - that you'd soon begin to forgive him. But as days turned to weeks, he craved for any form of interaction with you - even if it was you berating him. He longed for any form of physical touch - even if it was you kicking and punching him.

Jungkook knows he lost your trust - the same trust he fought hard to gain. His attempts to ensure that you were safe with him and that he'd never hurt you intentionally had since gone down the drain. You flinched away whenever he got too close and refused to even acknowledge his existance. 

Jungkook snaps his head up as soon as he hears the door creek open. He stands, eyes examining to be sure you weren't hurt. He's unsure why you're vomiting - you only ate a few bites of the breakfast. Maybe it didn't settle in your stomach the way it should've. 

"Are you alright?" Jungkook murmurs. He doesn't move closer to you, but nor does he step back. 

You ignored his words and made your way around him. Jungkook turns as you do so. "Y/N-"

"Please." you sigh out meekly. "Leave me alone, Jungkook."

"Jungkook?" Ren's words bring him back to reality.

Jungkook finally blinks, the moisture coming back to his eyes. He hadn't realized he had been staring at you as you spoke of the past.

"Y-Yes?"

"Is it becoming crucial to hear about the past?" Ren inquires. "You haven't blinked once."

Jungkook shakes his head. "It's something we have to do." he responds. "I want to right my wrongs." he turns back to you. "As long as you want to relive them. If it's too hard then-"

"I can talk about it." You nod at him. "It won't get better unless we talk about it."

"If it makes it easier to talk, I can leave the room once again." Ren suggests, but she's already standing and grabbing a few of her belongings.

"Doesn't it defeat the purpose of coming here?" Jungkook's eyes follows Ren as she strolls towards the door.

"Not at all." Ren shakes her head. She opens the door to her office. "I give you the tough topics to talk about and the two of you discuss them. I don't need to be present for it to happen." Ren walks out the door, giving the both of you a nod before closing it.

Jungkook turns to you and offers a small grin - an awkward one. The two of you had a list of topics to talk about - and you have yet to speak about the hookup the previous day. The both of you woke to Jin-Seon jumping onto bed to get your attention indicating that he was hungry. Just as you scurried out of the room, Han-Jae was coming out of Jin-Seon's room, rubbing his eyes. There was no time to talk when Jungkook cleans up the mess in the kitchen you made and you get both boys ready for the day - bath time was always an adventure with Jin-Seon, adding Han-Jae to the mix was just chaotic.

Jungkook had breakfast made by the time you're done, yet he's unsure how to approach you. He's unsure how to read you - if you were upset and regretted it, or did you feel the same as him?

You sat Han-Jae and Jin-Seon down between the two of you, both boys diving right into the breakfast Jungkook makes for you. You don't avoid his eyes, yet there still wasn't a moment in which you spoke about the night before - and Jungkook's unsure if he's overstepping if he asks you himself. 

"Where do you want to start?" You question. Ren had suggested that Jungkook and you recount how you were feeling once you returned home from Greece. It was a tough topic to speak of - especially when the outcome is you leaving while pregnant. Yet, there were little details that even you didn't wish to speak of. 

"Did you know you were pregnant then?" Jungkook whispers. "When you were vomiting?"

You shake your head. "No."

You grasp the small pills hidden deep within your closet and take one - just like you had ever since Eun-Young has given it to you. Still, you cannot shake off the feeling that something is wrong with you. You don't feel like yourself - food and aroma that once sat right with you has you vomiting within seconds. You felt bloated at times even without eating anything the cramps were becoming unbearable - you told yourself your period was coming, yet it had yet to come.

"Maybe you should see a doctor." Jungkook suggests when you come from the bathroom once more, wiping your mouth. "I can go with-"

"No." you interrupt. "I...I'm meeting Eun-Young today for lunch."

Jungkook furrows a brow. "I didn't know." he speaks. "How are you getting there?"

"Jae-beom agreed to come and stay with me." you walk towards your closet to get ready.

"Why didn't you ask me to take you?" Jungkook isn't upset with you - more at himself than anyone else. He's glad you came yourself comfortable with Eun-Young and Eun-Ji, yet he can't stop himself from thinking you're constantly away from home to be away from him.

"Thought you'd be busy." you respond without turning away from him. You scower the amount of clothes in the closet and try to piece together an outfit.

"I'm never too busy for you, Y/N." Jungkook states - but you know this. Jungkook has stopped what he was doing before when you asked him to get you some type of chocolate that could only be found 45 minutes away - all without complaining. You stated that you'd "die without it" and this was when he learned you enjoyed chocolate while on your period.

You don't respond, and Jungkook doesn't continue to talk.

Once you're dressed, Jungkook follows you down towards the foyer where Jae-beom is waiting. You don't say goodbye to him - even when he sullenly waves his own goodbyes.

Jae-beom doesn't take his eyes from you and sits in the next table over. He refuses to have history repeat itself - especially since Jungkook and you weren't on good terms. He's assured that the restrooms didn't have any escape route - and is satisfied when he doesn't find any.

You and Eun-Young speak lowly to one another but only exchange a few words while the two of you eat. Eun-Young's eyes rarely leave yours and she's no fool to know just exactly what you're going through. She wished she could have warned you herself about the bedding ceremony. It wasn't something she herself attended - none of the woman in Bangtan attended that - but going through it once, she understands how difficult it could be to go through. 

"Here," Eun-Young opens her purse. She glances at Jae-beom who was now shoving a piece of steak into his mouth. "I got this for you."

Eun-Young passes the rectangular box towards you - more like shoving it into your hands. You blink a few times until your eyes read the letters on the small packaging. "You think I'm pregnant?" you murmur.

"By what you've told me - yes." Eun-Young nods. "It doesn't hurt to check, right?"

You gulped. With all the symptoms you had of pregnancy, you refused to believe you could be. You never missed a day on the birth control Eun-Young has given you. You took them around the same time everyday - even while in Greece. What were the chances of Jungkook getting you pregnant during the bedding ceremony?

You visibly shudder and this makes Eun-Young grab your hand in sympathy. "It could be negative." she insists, yet she's sure it wasn't. "And if it is then we could drink to that."

You know Eun-Young's trying everything she could to cheer you up, but it wasn't working. The possibility of you being pregnant frightens you deep to your core. You ponce thought living alongside Jungkook wouldn't be too bad - but after what you endured in Greece, you saw the man in a different light. It was hard to separate yourself from him and even you could tell the regret and guilt coming over him - you couldn't bring yourself to forgive him. 

"I'll take it." you take a deep gulp of the water at your table. You were parched, throat dry with just the possibility of being pregnant. 

"I can come with?" Eun-Young offers and you only give a curt nod. You can feel Jae-Beom's eyes on you as you make your way to the restroom - you only hoped he wouldn;t follow. 

Thankfully, the restroom was empty when you arrived. Eun-Young lingers by the mirrors as you enter the stall. You hesitantly open the box. Your mind tells you to throw it away and come out after a few minutes and say it was negative - however, you don't. You know you can't. 

You never took a pregnancy test and only could hope you did something right while doing so. You placed the cap onto it and waited, eyes never leaving the stick test. It took about five minutes for the test to say the results - and when you saw the two positive lines it didn't take long for you to release the food you previously ate right into the toilet. 

"Y/N?" Eun-Young knocks softly on the stall. "Are you alright?"

No, you weren't. 

Jungkook listens intently as you speak and he himself feels sick. He doesn't want to speak and interrupt you, but he understands that this is hurting you to relive the moment. He places a hand on yours, thumb rubbing your hand and you lift your eyes to reach his. 

"I was scared." you admit to him. Reliving the moment you found out you were pregnant - in a restaurant stall at that - was something you wanted to forget. At that time in your life you weren't in the correct space of mind. "I scheduled an appointment for an abortion."

Jungkook's thumb stops rubbing and he stiffens. He doesn't blink when he scans your face for any form of lie - and finds none. After a few moments of silence, he swallows and blinks to regain moisture back into his eyes. "What?"

You chose to remove your hand from his. No secrets, like he wanted. "A few days later I scheduled an appointment for an abortion. I..."

"You said you were sick." Jungkook continues, the memories coming back to him of that day.  

It was the first time you'd ask for Jungkook to take you to an appointment that you set yourself - ensuring that he could wait in the waiting room. He was excited that day - you hasd actually spoke to him first and asked him to accompany you; to where you were thinking of aborting his child. 

"You're upset." you state, and when Jungkook shakes his head you continue. "You are."

"I'm not." Jungkook mumbles, but his eyes don't meet yours. He was upset at the thought of you aborting a child you two shared - but how upset could he be for you choosing what you wanted with your body? "Jin-Seon's...here." is all he manages to say. 

"I didn't go through with it." you nod your head. "I...started to cry. And the doctor kept asking me if I was sure and I wasn't sure."

Jungkook's heart tightens; not only at your words but at the way your voice begins to quiver. It makes him hate the way he treated you even more - you were hurting because of him and you couldn't come to him for comfort like you should've been able to.

"I didn't want to be pregnant and tied to you forever." your words hit Jungkook, but he doesn't show it. "But I couldn't go through with it. I'm not sure what changed because I still didn't want to bring a child into this world and force them to grow up and endure what you had."

"He's not going to." Jungkook is quick to state, head snapping to you. "I promised-"

"I know." you nod your head. The sheer flashback of you scheduling an appointment for an abortion always makes you cry. You couldn't imagine your life without Jin-Seon, he brought an immense amount of joy in your life. "I didn't know that back then."

You exhale. You'd admit that it felt good - like a boulder off of your shoulders - to speak to someone about this. Realizing you were pregnant by Jungkook, you swore that your life was over and everything he wanted from you was fulfilled. 

"Thank you for telling me." There's a lump in Jungkook's throat, but he is grateful nonetheless. You didn't have to tell him and went on with your life with leaving him in the dark - even if ultimately you didn't go through with it. "I wish I..." he licks his lips. How many times could he apologize until you grow annoyed? "...I was I was the man I should've been."

Jungkook eyes finally meet yours. 

"Is that why you left?" Jungkook murmurs. "You didn't want to be...tied to me?"

Carving the chip from your shoulder hurts like a bitch. You shed a few tears at the unfortunate circumstance - yet you didn't dwell on it. Tonight was the only night you were sure you'd be able to get away from Jungkook and Bangtan in a whole. 

Your plan was set in motion the day you decided you couldn't go through with the abortion. You sat in the restroom for half an hour to get yourself together - you were crying ugly tears. Jungkook couldn't know of this and would immediately catch on that something was wrong. 

You had a bag packed that you managed to hide deep within the closet with the essential clothes needed. You grabbed whatever you could find with value to it to eventually sell while on your escape. Jungkook didn't leave money laying around, but what you did find you managed to snatch and add to your possession. 

The same night of your escape was when you took the second pregnancy test - just to ensure that what you were doing was the right decision. There was the possibility that you weren't pregnant and maybe you'd have more time to plan your escape. But, even after you took this pregnancy test and witnessed the two lines you were left with only one option - and that was to escape and never turn back. 

It wasn't easy in the slightest, but you chose a day where there were limited guards in the Estate and Bangtan were holding a meeting elsewhere. You only had a limited amount of cash and used some of it to catch the train outside of Seoul - the rest being for cheap motels and food. 

You didn't have your phone with you, already knowing that Jungkook could easily track it. You only hoped by the time he realized you weren't home, you'd be far from Seoul and far from Bangtan. 

Your family weighed in the back of your mind. Would Jungkook ruin their lives out of spite? Were you being selfish for leaving them vulnerable to Jungkook's rampage? It's a thought you didn't enjoy thinking about. You could only hope that Jungkook wouldn't take his soon to be anger out on your family - they didn't deserve the shit end of the stick. 

You never remained in the same place for too long and made sure you weren't too comfortable anywhere. Your head remained down and you didn't risk speaking to anyone. As you grew in size, being out on your own was risky - yet you couldn't fathom going back to Jungkook now. 

You had no general plan. You only wished if you were gone long enough that Jungkook could get over you and maybe find a woman willing to be with him. You'd soon find a job and a place to stay and raise your child. Again, it was risky. You didn't have a set clinic you went to and only opted in Urgent Care who asked little questions and would tell you if your child was healthy or not.

You slept in motels? Outside?" Jungkook couldn't believe his ears, but it takes everything in him not to shout. It's all in the past and even though you and Jin-Seon are now safe - his mind still cannot fathom the idea of you being vulnerable out there without him.

"I survived...?"

Jungkook isn't amused in the slightest and you release a soft sigh.

"That's why I'm grateful to Soobin and Byeol. She was the one that found me unconcious and had Soobin bring me in."

Jungkook's jaw tightens, but he doesn't respond. Hearing Soobin's name brings back unwanted memories of the man. Truly, Jungkook couldn't be upset. It wasn't Soobin's fault that you grew fond of him - he was the opposite of Jungkook himself. Though it hurts to think that if you were never found that Jin-Seon would be raised with another man. However, how resentful could he be with the man? He assisted in taking care of you when he couldn't and in the end, he could only be thankful.

"Do you miss them?"

Jungkook leans back against the couch. He knows the answer to his question - you do. You spoke little of Soobin and Jungkook thinks it's because you'd rather not see him become jealous of the younger man. You speak of Byeol every now and then and Jungkook learns that you were truly content living with them. 

"A little." you admit. You often thought about sending a letter to them, but decided against it. Soobin surely hated you by now and Byeol would be disappointed - you never had the chance to say goodbye to her. "I wish I had...closure." 

Jungkook's eyes examines the way your face falls and now he's mentally sighing. He told himself that you'd never go back to that place - and never see Soobin, the man who took you from him. Yet, Jungkook accepts that you grown to love the two of them and if given the decision just a year ago - you'd wouldn't be here with him. 

"We can take Jin-Seon..." Jungkook begins and when your eyes snap to his, he feels his heart flutter. "...and visit...?" he's unsure how to word it. Soobin despised him - by the words of Jimin and Jin - and he's never met Byeol herself. But, if it would make you happy and grow to love him, it's an act he'd had to go through. 

"I thought-"

"I'm trying, Y/N." Jungkook groans. "If you and I are going to be better than," Jungkook releases a sigh. The things he did to get you to love him. "I guess we can-"

"Ok." you nod your head without a second thought. "I, um...Hyun-woo is coming over tonight for dinner."

Oh.

Jungkook nods his head slowly. He makes an attempt to smile, but it doesn't appear as one; more like a grimance. 

Hyun-woo had been released a week prior from rehab. He began a program that offered him housing as long as he worked, and so far it's been successful. 

"Have you seen him since his release from rehab?"

You shake your head. 

"I see." Jungkook nods. He's unsure what to say. "Does he know about me?"

Another shake of your head and Jungkook manages to feel some weight release from his shoulders. That only meant that Jungkook had time to prepare for Hyun-woo's arrival. 

"Are you alright?" Jungkook hears your words and if only there was a way to explain to you his distain for Hyun-woo - he would. However, there wasn't a way to do so. Would you forgive him if you knew he was the one selling your brother the drugs that made him an addict?

And was responsible for the debt?

And his men ruining your apartment - and traumatizing you in the long run?

Of course you wouldn't.

"I'm fine." Jungkook murmurs. "I think we should have a family dinner, don't you? I can invite my hyungs and you can invite your siblings." 

Jungkook's intention was to purely threaten Hyun-woo. Having all 7 of them there, he wouldn't dare speak aloud. 

"And of course the children. It's not every day someone special enters your life again."

Even if Jungkook wished Hyun-woo remained far from him, you and his son. 

"Okay." you're beaming - so beautfiul in eyes that he returns the gesture. 

"Can't wait." Jungkook mumbles.

"Jungkook." you murmur, voice dangerously low. "Why is my son in the bath tub when I bathed him an hour ago?"

The dinner hasn't even started and you were already stressed.

Jungkook insisted that he bring back his personal kitchen staff to cook for the night so you and him didn't have to run around and do much. You agreed - however, Jin-Seon and Jungkook had different plans. After you dressed him for dinner, Jungkook thought it would be alright to give his son a quick treat. Nothing too much to spoil dinner - just ice cream. However, it only took Jungkook turning his back once for Jin-Seon to ruin his outfit.

"Oh no," Jungkook quickly removes Jin-Seon's hands from inside the bowl. His dress shirt was covered in the chocolate ice cream, as were his hands and cheeks. "eomma is going to be upset." he shakes his head. "Not with you. With me." You'd been running around making sure that everything was perfect - and now he would surely have to hear you scream.

Jin-Seon lifts his ice cream covered hand to Jungkook who shakes his head again. "No, I'm not hungry." he murmurs to his son. He lifts his son in his arms and ensures that his small hands don't touch and dirty his own shirt. "We need to bathe you before eomma sees."

Now Jin-Seon happily played with the water toys Jungkook had put into the bath while he rubbed his arms and back.

"Y/N, baby." Jungkook gives you a short smile with widened eyes. "Why aren't you down-"

"What happened to his clothes?" you groan, eyes cast down to the discarded clothes by the large bathtub. "You gave him ice cream, didn't you? I told you-"

"Not to give him anything messy." Jungkook sighs in defeat. You told him this day by day - and each time Jungkook never listened. "I'm sorry. That's why I'm bathing him now."

"There isn't any time to clean these." you huff, lifting the cute matching outfit Jin-Seon would've worn to match Jungkook and you perfectly. "Now we have to change our clothes."

Jin-Seon and Jungkook watch as you kick off your heels and scurry off with a huff. Jungkook could only laugh - you were cute when you were anxious.

Jin-Seon loved taking baths and removing him from said bath was what caused a meltdown. Jungkook chasing his naked and wet son around the bathroom was something you didn't need now - not when the both of them needed to be dressed and ready.

"Jin-Seon!" Jungkook hisses, raising his voice slightly. If he didn't get him dressed he was going to have to deal with your wrath.

Jungkook stops in his tracks as Jin-Seon flinches. He soon falls to the floor and begins sobbing loudly.

"Why is he crying?" you scurry back into the bathroom. You examine Jin-Seon, concerned that maybe he fell and hit his head.

Jungkook overcomes with sadness, his heart pumping at the sight of his son. He scoops Jin-Seon into his arms and cradles him close. His small arms wrap around Jungkook's neck as he continues to cry. "I didn't mean to yell at you." he rubs his sons back.

You huff and roll your eyes. Any other time, you'd be concerned for Jin-Seon's whimpering - but now was not the time. Especially if he was crying because Jungkook raised his voice slightly at him. Jin-Seon was spoiled by his father and never had to deal with Jungkook's temper - it amazes you how this was the first time he had to.

You place Jungkook's clothes onto the bed besides Jin-Seon. "Get dressed. I'll dress him." you say as Jungkook finishes lotioning Jin-Seon's skin.

"No, what if he thinks I'm mad at him?" Jungkook frowns. "Appa didn't mean to raise his voice at you." he says to Jin-Seon.

"That's cute," you sigh. "but we need to get dressed so-"

"I'll get him dressed." Jungkook stands to face you. "You go downstairs and get ready to greet our guests. I'll make sure we're down in the next five minutes."

You take a deep breath and nod. You're unsure why you're so anxious. The only person you haven't seen in nearly 2 years was Hyun-woo - and maybe that's why you want to appear as though you had your life together. "Ok." you murmur an agreement.

Five minutes turned to fifteen, and Jungkook finally has Jin-Seon dressed when he enters the sitting room to find most of everyone already there. He's holding Jin-Seon, whose head is laid on his shoulder with both arms wrapped around his neck. As he enters, it's already chaotic with the amount of children running around - you had a total of 9 nieces and nephews and that didn't even include his Hyung's children.

"Jin-Seon-ah."

"Noona, hello." Jungkook smiles once he sees the familiar face of Namjoon's wife - behind her Momoka holding hands with Cho-he and Yui. "Momoka-ah." he nods his head.

Jin-Seon lifts his head and soon reaches his arms out for the woman before him. Jungkook shakes his head - it appears as when it came to his Hyungs, Jin-Seon could only stand to be around them for so long. Their wives were a different story - he adored each of them, Namjoon's being his ultimate favorite.

With Jin-Seon being gushed over by his Hyung's wives, Jungkook makes his way around to find you. When he does, he couldn't help but think how beautiful you looked. You barely slept when it came to organizing this occasion - making sure everything was perfect, even if it was just a dinner with family.

"Is there a reason why we're doing this, eomma?" Soobin crosses his arms. "How are we certain that it's even safe?"

"Do you know something about these people that I don't?" Byeol asks her son, furrowing a brow at him.

Yes - Jungkook and the mountain of men that he sent to their home were more than "good and generous" people like his mother believed. After a year of hearing nothing from Jungkook, there was another knock on their door - this time another man calling himself V. The man made himself at home and spoke mainly to his mother instead of him. He showed pictures of a now one year old Jin-Seon - Soobin's mind convincing himself it was just a ploy to butter his mother up - and inviting them to a dinner.

Byeol was none the wiser - but Soobin wasn't convinced. He was threatened to stay away from you and Jin-Seon, now they were inviting them to a sudden dinner? He wanted nothing to do with it - but his mother wouldn't hear any of it. She missed you and Jin-Seon, and having the chance to see the both of you (with no questions of where the hell you two been and why the sudden leave - she was an understanding woman, afterall) she was going to take it.

"We're here." Soobin murmurs sullenly, the large estate was a home he'd never thought he'd ever come across. It appeared to be something from a movie inside a gated community.

Soobin removes himself from the car - brought to them by V of course - and allows his mother to hold onto his arm. He follows close behind the men as they make their way to the front entrance - huge doors with carvings upon it, Soobin scoffs. Even Jungkook's doors and knobs were far more expensive than anything he could afford.

Byeol smiles as the doors open for them, a sea of people already inside and chatting amongst one another. Kids running around and playing in the large area, the sounds of laughter and joy coming from their youth makes her heart feel warm.

"We can always turn back and-"

"Soobin." Byeol hisses, and Soobin shuts his mouth. He wasn't impressed - sure, the estate was huge, luxurious and possibly the best he's ever been in. However, Jungkook and his friends - whoever the hell Jimin, V and Seokjin were to him - were to not be trusted. This money they flaunted had to be obtained illegally - how else could one man live like this?

"Ah, our guests."

Speak of the devil.

Jimin wears a devilious smile on his lips. He rolls his eyes sassily at Soobin who only scoffs beneath his breath. He holds out his hand for Byeol who removes herself from her son and takes it without a second thought. "Thank you for coming, ajumma." he says sweetly to her, but Soobin only huffs at the fradulance. "Cho-hee, Yui," Jimin waves a hand to the side at two young girls who come towards him at the sound of their names. "These our my daughters."

Soobin crosses his arms. He's unsure what's going on, and why they're being introduced to his children. They were cute - whatever - but this isn't what Soobin would thought would happen. His mind told him that he would be bound and gagged upon arrival - not meet two children, and a dozen more belonging to these men.

Byeol adored children and soon, she's caught up by the two girls to realize Soobin seathing behind her.

"Soobin." Jimin hums. "How's-"

"Why are we here?"

"Rude." Jimin chuckles. "You should be glad to be in the presence of Bangtan."

"Bang...tan?" Soobin knits his brows. "What-"

"You know what we are and there's no point in hiding it any longer. You're not stupid enough to go against us any longer." Jimin waves his hand dismissivly. "Kookie was the one that insisted we invited you."

Soobin crosses his arms.

"Do you not want to see Jin-Seon? He might not like you, he's attached to his father's hip." Jimin rolls his eyes. "Cute kid, though. How about I get him for you?"

Jimin strolls away without hearing what Soobin has to say - if he was truly getting Jin-Seon was unsure to Soobin.

"We have guests to speak with." Jungkook places a hand on the small of your back. Prying Jin-Seon away from his hyung's wife was a challenge, but he managed to do so with taffy candy.

You turned around and glared at Jungkook. "Why is he eating candy? We're about to-"

"You can slap me around later about it." Jungkook sighs. "Come on."

You allow Jungkook to lead you to wherever - towards the front entrance. As you come closer, your eyes train on the familiar faces. Your throat tightens and soon, you're slowing down. "Why are-"

"Did you invite them?" you murmur to Jungkook who nods. "I-I...what if-"

"They wouldn't have agreed to come if they were upset, Y/N." Jungkook assures. "I'm trying to right my wrongs." Maybe breaking into a home, pointing a gun at Soobin and disrespecting not only him, but his home was more than wrong - but, he was attempting to correct it. 

"Okay." you nod, but the uneasiness in the pits of your stomach doesn't die down.

Instead, it bubbles with each step closer - especially when your eyes meet Soobin's. You swallow - he doesn't appear upset with you, more shocked to see you. His eyes flicker to Jungkook and Jin-Seon and noticeably softens. 

"Soobin." you bow when you reach the two of them. "Byeol-ah."

Cho-hee and Yui had scurried off once they didn't have the attention of Byeol. The older woman widens her eyes at you, then turns towards the tall - and handsome -  man besides you holding Jin-Seon. 

"Y/N." Byeol doesn't contain her excitement. She wouldn't ask what happened to you, or where you'd been - she never truly understood your situation. She wasn't going to judge and instead would rather enjoy the time she could spend with you now. "Is this..."

"Yes." you nod your head, a smile on your lips. Your eyes glance at Jin-Seon, sucking on the taffy when Jungkook goes to put him down. "He's a bit-"

"attached." Jungkook murmurs when Jin-Seon clenches his suit pants tightly. His small eyes look up at Soobin who does nothing but look down at him. 

"Watch the way you speak to me in front of my son." Jungkook hisses at Hyun-woo. He has Jin-Seon in his arms as he glares at his uncle. He's rocking him gently side to side to soothe him."A man like you should be grateful that you're out of rehab and clean - all at my expense." Jungkook's words were dripped with venom - sinister even. "I'm not against tying you down and having you injected with whatever drug to prove to Y/N that you're nothing but the addict we all know you are."

Hyun-woo's eyes widened, but Jungkook's words didn't stop. "Y/N and I are happy. Jin-Seon is happy with both parents and you're not taking that away from me." Jungkook shakes his head, chuckling. He begins to rock Jin-Seon in his arms. "You have two choices, Hyun-woo. You can stay and continue to live comfortably at my expense or..." Jungkook shrugs. "I'll have to comfort my wife and explain to her that some addicts cannot be saved. And you'll be right back at rehab - this time, there won't be no coming back home. Your choice."

Of course, how Hyun-woo and Jungkook gotten here could not go unexplained.

Your eyes nearly teared up at the sight of your brother. He entered behind Jae-beom, and immediately it was as if time stood still. His hair was cut short and no longer the greasy mess it once was. He was cleanly shaved and overall appeared much healthier. His eyes darted around the room, finding Sehun first. It didn't take long before the five of you all stood around one another hugging the eldest of the family.

Jungkook stood back, not yet making himself known. Yoongi stood closest to the doorway, Taehyung creeping to his side. Namjoon and Hoseok stood directly behind Jungkook while Jimin and Jin stood opposite of one another and on each side of Hyun-woo. No would would have suspected their intimidation tactic - they were just men introducing themselves to a new (but familiar) face.

"Hyun-woo. I told you I had someone you should meet." your voice was filled with excitement and Hyun-woo's eyes matched them. When you turned and motioned for Jungkook and Jin-Seon over was when the light drained from his eyes. "This is Jungkook. My husband." Calling Jungkook your husband was foreign on your tongue - at times you nearly forgot the two of you were bound by law. "And our son."

"Jin-Seon." Jungkook smiles - too sickly sweet for Hyun-woo's liking.

The man felt sick and he turned his head to the right side, Jin's eyes staring back into his own. His heart pumps outside of his chest when his eyes catch Jimin to his left - and behind Jungkook to meet eyes with Namjoon and Hoseok.

"Are you alright?" you place a hand on Hyun-woo's shoulder and the man flinches.

Hyun-woo nods his head. "Y-Yes." he swallows the lump in his throat. "I-I...this is all news to me. You have a son." he tries to smile down at his nephew - but the similarity to him and the man you called your husband and father of your son was frightening. "And a husband."

"It's a change. But a good change." you hold your hands out for Jin-Seon and the boy willingly comes from his father's arms to you. "Say hi, Jin-Seon-ie."

Jin-Seon doesn't say or do much - just blinks at the unfamiliar man. Hyun-woo blinks away, eyes on Jungkook's - whose eyes were already boring into his own. A silent warning - they all were giving Hyun-woo's warning. Don't say anything, don't do anything - don't act out in the slightest.

"Let's eat." Jungkook claps his hands, eyes never leaving Hyun-woo's. "To welcome back our special guest."

Hyun-woo is sickened to his stomach throughout the dinner. He'd admit that he missed his family that grew before his eyes. He had mountains of nieces and nephews that his siblings gave him - especially you, his youngest sister.

However, Hyun-woo was no fool in understanding that they were brainwashed - all of them. His siblings adored Jungkook, as did their children. Their eyes shined at the man and their smiles plastered on their lips were wide and genuine. Jin-seon, though having his own seat between you and Jungkook, insisted on being in his father's lap while he ate. Jungkook appeared to be like the kind father figure and family man.

And not the Drug Lord he truly was.

Hyun-woo glances at you to find your eyes already on him. He offers a quick smile before he takes a few gulps of the water. You must've not known who exactly you were married to and he cannot blame you for this. How in the world Jungkook managed to slither his way into your life is beyond him, but he hates himself for not being around to allow him to do so.

The dinner was successful in your eyes. Hyun-woo appeared stiff and standoffish, yet you were glad he was able to be here with you tonight. Having your full family here with you - and even the family you've been married into - makes your heart full. You're glad you've had the chance to see Soobin and Byeol and was grateful immensely that they harbor no hard feelings for you. Byeol adored Jin-Seon and as the dinner wrapped up, she made sure to ruffle his hair affectionately.

As for Jin-Seon himself, the young boy was fighting his own sleep in his fathers lap. His small hand clenches his shirt while his head rests against him. You smile gently and kiss his head. You glance at Jungkook. "Do you want to take him to bed while I show Soobin and Byeol out?"

Jungkook nods his head slowly. He adjusts Jin-Seon in his lap who begins to whimper.

"Can I?" Hyun-woo speaks up. While the rest of his siblings began to scatter to gather up their children to leave for the night, he remained at the table. "Um, wish him goodnight?"

Jungkook tighten his jaw but he nods. "I'm sure he'll like that." he murmurs out.

You nod your head. "Okay..." you hum. "Kookie. Hyun-woo." you nod. The tension couldn't go unnoticed by you - but Jungkook was trying and so was Hyun-woo.

"Follow me." Jungkook stands. He can feel your eyes on him as he makes his way out of the kitchen, making sure to say a few words to his Hyung and their wives as Jin-Seon and him made it past them.

Hyun-woo follows closely behind Jungkook, eyes glaring at his back. His nephew's eyes catch his and his eyes soften. There was a part of you in Jin-Seon and it makes his heart tighten that he feels little adoration for him because of who his father was. Jungkook stops after a few moments of climbing stairs.

"How did you get involved with Y/N?"

Hyun-woo doesn't waste any time in questioning. Jin-Seon's eyes were closed, arms limp around Jungkook's neck. "That's what you have to ask me?" he chuckles. He turns around to furrow a brow at Hyun-woo. "A thank you would be a better conversation starter?"

"Thank you?" Hyun-woo hisses. "You-"

"I what?" Jungkook snaps quietly. He didn't need anyone hearing the - especially you - or Jin-Seon waking. "Got you out of jail? Paid for your rehab?"

"Don't try to portray yourself as some type of Saint!" Hyun-woo hisses. "You're nothing but some type of Drug Lord that conned your way into my sisters pants!"

"Watch the way you speak to me in front of my son." Jungkook hisses at Hyun-woo. He has Jin-Seon in his arms as he glares at his uncle. He's rocking him gently side to side to soothe him - he began to stir. "A man like you should be grateful that you're out of rehab and clean - all at my expense." Jungkook's words were dripped with venom - sinister even. "I'm not against tying you down and having you injected with whatever drug to prove to Y/N that you're nothing but the addict we all know you are."

Hyun-woo's eyes widened, but Jungkook's words didn't stop. "Y/N and I are happy. Jin-Seon is happy with both parents and you're not taking that away from me." Jungkook shakes his head, chuckling. He begins to rock Jin-Seon in his arms. "You have two choices, Hyun-woo. You can stay and continue to live comfortably at my expense or..." Jungkook shrugs. "I'll have to comfort my wife and explain to her that some addicts cannot be saved. And you'll be right back at rehab - this time, there won't be no coming back home. Your choice."

Jungkook turns away from a stunned Hyun-woo and opens the door to his bedroom. He strolls towards his bed where he places Jin-Seon right in the middle. Jin-Seon whimpers lowly, but doesn't wake.

Hyun-woo's eyes watch Jungkook place a kiss on his nephews head before lifting the covers to his torso. He swallows, feeling his hands sweat. His mind swirls around Jungkook's words. He wouldn't doubt that Jungkook was a good father and possibly a good husband to you - you didn't appear as if you knew what he did for a living, and by the attire and the massive estate you lived in, you and Jin-Seon were comfortable.

But, Hyun-woo also didn't doubt that Jungkook would do what he threatened. The idea of Jungkook injecting him with whatever to get him to relapse makes his blood run cold - he was the same man of 2 years ago, now just a father and husband. 

Hyun-woo blinks just as Jungkook closes the bedroom door behind him. He's facing Hyun-woo, eyes glaring and shoulders bulked. 

"Do you want to see Jin-Seon's room?"

Jungkook strolls past him without a response and opens a door to a room exactly across from them. 

"He doesn't sleep in here often." Jungkook murmurs, flickering on the light switch. "Only plays. He prefers to sleep with us."

Hyun-woo hums at the sight of the room. The array of toys littering around the room and the large TV was enough to tell him that Jin-Seon was already spoiled - in a good way. He enjoyed to see children have what they needed and desired. 

"Are you trying to convince me you aren't a bad person?" Hyun-woo asks Jungkook. His eyes linger on a picture hanging above Jin-Seon's bed - a neat bed that appears to not have been slept in. It's a picture of you, Jin-Seon and Jungkook and his eyes blinks away what appears to be tears forming. 

"I don't need to convince you that I am anything." Jungkook shrugs. "You know who I am and that's all you'll ever see me as."

"Does Y/N know?"

"Yes."

Hyun-woo spins around to face Jungkook. "You're lying." he shakes his head. "Y/N would never willingly-"

"She knows who I am and what I do." Jungkook hisses. "And we're happy."

"Does she know who sold her brother the drugs?" Hyun-woo snaps. "Does she know it was-"

"You're a grown man, Hyun-woo. I'm not going to take responsibility for your own actions." Jungkook scoffs. He leans against the door frame with crossed arms. "I'm not going to allow you to take my family away from me."

Hyun-woo eyes lingers on the seriousness in Jungkook's eyes. 

"I gave you that coke that you snorted in hopes that you'd flip it and get me the money I needed." Jungkook says. "Instead, you snorted it all like the addict you were. That amount of coke happened to be worth the exact amount of money you owed me. If you were smart..." Jungkook hums. "...maybe you would've never ended up in jail. And maybe, Y/N wouldn't be my wife or the mother of my child."

Jungkook shrugs. In the end, there was truth in Jungkook's words. The drugs he given Hyun-woo that night in his office was the exact amount the man owed him. However, he's no idiot. Hyun-woo is an addict and giving an addict their addiction would do nothing but make them fall into temptation. He was well aware that Hyun-woo wouldn't sell it and instead would use it all for himself. 

"You still hate me, however. I'm well aware." Jungkook licks his lips. "And you should. I was the one that sold you the drugs I knew you could never pay."

Hyun-woo clenches his fist. His eyes are glaring at Jungkook - the man who stood before him with a smug look upon his face. 

"And while you were arrested, I was also the man who required your sister to pay the price you owed." Jungkook continues. He places a hand in his pocket. "Of course, I didn't want Y/N's money. I wanted her, my beautiful wife. However, of course, she was far too independent. Why would she need a man like me, Hyun-woo? When she could do everything she needed herself?"

Jungkook pulls his hands out of his pocket, a small syringe in his hands. 

"I had three of my men go to Y/N's house and break anything they can find and tell her she had a week to come up with an insane amount of money. More than you even owed." Jungkook scoffs. "She was desperate to pay off your debts. The debts you left her, Hyun-woo."

Hyun-woo watches as Jungkook lifts the syringe, all the while the older man is stiff. Listening to what Jungkook has to say is making him feel sick to his stomach. 

"So desperate that she was willing to sell her own virginity." Jungkook shakes his head with a tsk and Hyun-woo's eyes widen. "Luckily, I was there to buy her virginity. I'm no heathen, Hyun-woo, of course I didn't sleep with Y/N until she was ready."

"Shut up." Hyun-woo shakes his head. "Why-"

"I mind as well tell you the truth, right?" Jungkook shrugs his shoulders. "I gave you two choices, Hyun-woo. You'd either leave here tonight and enjoy your freedom like the rest of your siblings or," Jungkook toys with the syringe in his hand. "I'm going to drug you. Y/N is going to find you drugged up in our son's room and she's going to hate you for it."

Hyun-woo swallows. 

"And of course, I'm going to be the doting husband. I'm going to send you right back to rehab and pay for it. This time - you'll never leave. I have connections and those connections will make sure you never recover. Y/N will never know that, however."

Jungkook blinks at Hyun-woo. "Regardless, Hyun-woo. My wife and son will be happy and comfortable. You're not taking that from me."

You climb the stairs, your heels in your hands. You were exhausted, but glad that the dinner was successful. You promised to come visit Soobin and Byeol, but the goodbyes weren't easy. You had to thank Jungkook for allowing them to re-enter your and Jin-Seon's life.

As you got to the top, your eyes find Jungkook in the doorway of Jin-Seon's room. 

"Is he asleep in his own room tonight?" you ask from down the hall, coming closer to see if it was true. 

Jungkook's eyes disconnect from Hyun-woo's and his hand swiftly hides the small syringe. 

"No." Jungkook shakes his head. He gives you a smile as you appear. "I was showing Hyun-woo his room."

"Ah." you nod. "It's like a wonderland in here, right?" you giggle, eyes connecting with your brothers.

Your smile turns to a frown soon when you notice tears dripping from Hyun-woo's eyes. You glance at Jungkook who appears just as confused as you. You step forward, hands reaching out for your elder brother. "W-What's wrong?"

Hyun-woo shakes his head. "I..." How could he tell you the truth? That he's the reason you've been through so much, and Jungkook hasn't even scratched the surface on everything you've been through since he's been gone? Even if he did tell you everything Jungkook was about, would it matter? It was his fault for allowing Jungkook the opening to you because he was nothing but an addict. 

"I'm so happy that you found happiness." Hyun-woo murmurs pathetically. He glances at Jungkook only briefly before his eyes connect with your own. "You've grown and now you're a mother and..."

Hyun-woo is stunned to feel your arms wrapped around him - he doesn't deserve it. He doesn't deserve to feel your warmth or be the center of your love; not after he failed you as a brother. 

Jungkook takes a few steps and places a hand on the low of your back. "Y/N's happy to have you back." he nods at Hyun-woo, satisfied that the man wasn't dumb. He chose the right side - the side that wouldn't put him into an early grave. "She's told me so much about you while you were gone. You enjoyed baking in your youth."

You disconnect yourself from Hyun-woo and nod your head, eyes shining. "Jungkook knows people who could get you back into baking. It won't be easy, of course, since you haven't baked in so long but-"

"If it's something you'd want to do." Jungkook stares at Hyun-woo deeply. "It can be done. Ye-Rim has her own restaurant and you could have your own bakery eventually. You just have to want it."

You just have to want it.

You just have to want it.

Hyun-woo nods his head. He did want it - but he couldn't shake the feeling of regret going through his veins. He couldn't shake the feeling that he was becoming a sell out and allowing Jungkook to throw whatever money he had at him. 

"Good." Jungkook smiles, a sinister smile that doesn't reach your eyes. "Tomorrow I'll make some phone calls. We have a guest bedroom down the hall to the right where you'd be comfortable."

Hyun-woo nods and doesn't say another word to you or Jungkook. The heel of his shoes is heard clicking against the tile until it's inaudible.

"Thank you." you sigh to Jungkook. You place your head into his chest. 

"You don't have to thank me, Y/N." Jungkook wraps his arms around you. He inhales the scent of your hair and feels the goosebumps rise upon his skin. "You're my wife. I'll do whatever makes you happy."

You take a deep breath. You don't respond and Jungkook doesn't need you to because he understand you're content. You're happy now that Hyun-woo is back and better - safer. 

Jungkook ponders how his life would be if he never proceeded to go through with his plan. He wouldn't have Jin-Seon - and he wouldn't have you. Sure, there's the constant display of events that plays out in his mind that one day you'd find out about him - about what he's done to get you. However, it'll be against his dead body to see you and his son be taken away from him.

In a way, Jungkook thanks Hyun-woo for turning out the way he did. He gave him a wife who he adored and a son who he'd do anything for. All Hyun-woo had to do now was take what was being handed to him - a better life in the career he adores. 

Jungkook was happy. You were happy. Jin-seon was happy - and that's all he could truly wish for. 

Thank you all for reading and enjoying Cruel Intentions 🥲

Overthinking (Drabble) | Reward (Drabble)

@silversparkles11 @jungkook-selcas @minthairwhen @aajjks @sunshine066 @mwitsmejk @jnghs @shescharlie @whipwhoops @douknowbts @ultimatebasura @yoongixthot @janedukiesworld @thvhoe @juju-227592 @etsuko-99 @teresaisla @barbiethingzzz19 @doublebunv @exfolitae @bjoriis @sweetempathprunetree @raynom @swweetnightt @wonieeee @ayoongiverse @seajae @ungodlyjoon @mooncuddler @charcharfairy @breadgeniedope @pb-n-juju @jjhmk @devilsbooksworld @jiminscheekies @joonie-tunes @lilyflowerguk @ciderxi @theblueslytherin @seokjinkismet @kisskissjk @bloodline1632 @ebonynextdoor @hollyweird0 @katsbqbe @jjk7lys @darkuni63 @thmrdrs

[happyhauntt]

a writer & his muse — sirius black

writing masterlist | askbox

─── summary: renowned mystery writer sirius black has a new muse, and it just so happens to be the homicide detective who hates him. (castle!au)

─── pairing: mystery writer!sirius black x detective!reader.

─── warnings: fluffy banter, mild threats of violence, sirius is a little bastard and knows it, honestly just a fun time. muggle au.

─── word count: 1k.

You're not entirely sure what you did to deserve this sort of punishment.

The station is pretty quiet when you arrive, as it usually is this early in the morning. A sigh of relief escapes you as you arrive at your desk, dropping your bag at the foot of your chair, and you realise that aforementioned punishment — the newest irritation in your life — has yet to arrive.

You’d really love to know what you did to deserve this. Whether you accidentally pissed off some ancient deity, or cut in line at the supermarket so your cosmic karma is unbalanced, or perhaps your boss just really hates you, even though he invited you to his birthday barbecue a few months ago and had called you, endearingly, the 'best detective he'd ever trained.'

You hadn't thought he could be harbouring a secret grudge against you, but really, what other reason could there be for this kind of punishment?

And it is a punishment. Of that, you have no doubt. It is a tooth-grinding, migraine-inducing kind of punishment, and if you weren't acutely aware of the consequences, you might have tried to murder him by now.

Him being, of course, the world-famous mystery writer, Sirius Black.

What a smarmy, egotistical little bastard.

From the very moment he sauntered into the station, wearing a beat-up leather jacket and a devil-may-care smirk, you'd known your life was about to get complicated. Or, well, more complicated.

Your job is difficult enough, chasing down criminals and solving murders all day, without having a nosy moron breathing down your neck, spouting crackpot conspiracy theories when the evidence is much more straightforward.

You hear his footsteps on the linoleum before he strolls around the corner, clutching a cup of takeout coffee in each hand. He sets one of them on the desk in front of you, brandishing a crooked grin like a weapon.

"How is my lovely muse this morning?" He winks at you as he slumps into a nearby chair, pulled close to the corner of your desk for research purposes. You wonder if he's ever heard the phrase 'personal space'.

Your lip curls. A slew of paperwork has been spread across your desk for an hour, all related to the case you solved earlier in the week, where Black had been, surprisingly, somewhat helpful. Your boss had been liberal with his praise, and Black's ego had puffed up to an insufferable degree.

Unfortunately, you're now reaping the consequences.

"Considering if I can kill you and make it look like an accident," you reply, your voice flat. You sniff the coffee before taking a sip. Annoyance punches through you when you realise he has your coffee order memorised. You want to bury him in a shallow grave.

Black leans back in his chair, a wide grin sweeping over his face. "If anyone could, it would be you."

"Does any part of this shadowing gig involve helping me with the, frankly ridiculous, amount of paperwork you generate?"

He purses his lips in thought for a moment before shaking his head. Strands of shaggy black hair fall around his face. "Never really written the paperwork into my books. A bit boring, you know. Nothing the readers want to bother with."

You roll your eyes. "And yet, Mr Black, you insist on bothering me."

"Sirius, please." He chuckles at you. How were you unlucky enough to catch his attention? How insane is he, wanting to follow a homicide detective around for research on his new book? "Mr Black is my father, and a large part of the reason I write mysteries, not horror." He feigns a shudder.

"Mr Black," you say, fixing him with an unamused glare. "When, exactly, do you think you'll be finished with your book?"

"Detective, you wound me!" He splays his hand over his chest, just above his heart. You try not to stare at the tattoos flexing across his knuckles, or the way his shirt goes tight across his chest. "Here I was, thinking you enjoyed our time together."

"Like a hole in the head," you mutter.

There's a teasing twinkle in his eyes. He takes a long sip of his own coffee while you return your attention to the paperwork, scribbling your signature in the appropriate places.

Every once in a while, you can feel him watching you. Eyes like swirls of cigarette smoke, analysing your every move. There’s an odd little tick he has, his fingers tapping an unfamiliar rhythm against his leg. Whether the sound is soothing or frustrating, you can’t quite decide.

The shrill ringing of your desk phone startles you both. He’s trying not to laugh, you can tell, as your hand darts out to answer it.

I wonder if this is how zoo animals feel, you think to yourself as you listen to the officer on the other end of the line. You scratch the information out onto a post-it note, an address and a few other key details, before hanging up.

He’s a bundle of energy beside you. His knee bounces, and there’s a gleam in his eyes that is beyond inappropriate, considering the circumstances of your job and his so-called research.

It’s like being stalked by a golden retriever, except you’re certain you would prefer the dog over Sirius Black’s presence.

“Grab your coat, Mr Black. We’ve got a body.” You push yourself away from your desk, filing the paperwork away in the drawer for later.

He bounces to his feet with a level of enthusiasm that should, frankly, be illegal.

“Try to be a little less excited,” you say in a chiding, exhausted voice as you lead him out of the station. “Someone is dead.”

“I’ll try to be as macabre as possible, detective,” he assures you. He climbs into the passenger seat of your car, drumming his fingers against his leg in that bizarre non-rhythm again. “I’ll channel my mother. You know, I based one of my characters on her…”

Tuning him out is easier said than done, but you do your best. The book must be nearly finished. How much more research can he possibly do?

You just have to grit your teeth and bear his presence for a few more weeks. You just have to make sure you don’t kill him for a few more weeks. He’ll surely get bored of you and find a new muse at some point, right?

[demonicc0024tt]

I’m tweaking so have this flippy age theory

So being in the htf fandom I’ve noticed that lots of people portray Flippy as this traumatized war vet in his early 20’s and it bugs me out because there’s no way this man is 20 by the time he’s “discharged” from the war. Although it was never confirmed by any means that he’s actually discharged, he may be on some leave or the war just ended. But what war did he even go to? Well it’s only mentioned he went to W.A.R wich stands for Weaponized Animal Regiment, but seeing that Fliqpy’s booby traps are heavily inspired by the viet cong many say it may be possible that he also went to the Vietnam war (i also thought that would be the most rational explanation) which would make sense considering the insane trauma he has but also make him 60 even if he was drafted at the end of it, so i think he was just really interested in it but never actually got to fight there since it ended. He could have taken part in the Persian Gulf War but i doubt that. All we know is that Flippy went to the W.A.R so let’s stick to that.

What age did he go to the war then?

There is a possibility that if he was interested in joining the military from a young age and enlisted by himself then he may have been 18 at the beginning , though if that wouldn’t be the case and he was drafted instead, he would be around 20-25 years old. So let’s go with 20.

In the W.A.R journal episode he’s said to be a private, which is considered the lowest military rank (E-1) , but seeing the patch on his shoulder that could be inspired (definitely is) by the military rank insignia he could be a E-2 second class private.

The mission Flippy, Mouse Ka-Boom and Sneaky are on where they have to confront a literal General, could be seen as a very serious and important mission that would take at least 4 years of amazing performance and service for a literal second class private to go on without any forces except for two other privates, which i think makes sense because Flippy killed a literal General and that on it’s own could get him promoted to a sergeant (E-5). While promotions from E1 to E4 are mostly gained by time, E5 and higher are mostly performance and binding time earned. For a E2 to get to E5 it would take a great amount of time. To get to E3 could take at least 10 months and to E5? That could even be three to six years based on performance or even more!

So let’s say that Flippy was a great soldier for at least four years, got assigned to a serious mission, completed it alone because his teammates died, and that got him promoted to a Sergant at about 24/25 years old.

Although there is no real number of years he was at war it would make sense for it to be at least ten years if we look back at how long he had to be a private to be promoted,and how long he could fight as a sergeant. If we went down that route then he was like 30 when he left.

His first appearance is the hide and seek episode that came out in the year 2000. If we used the year when the episode came out as the year that Flippy left the military then that would make him about 31. Why 31 and not 30? Because imagine you leave a war you’ve been fighting for ten years. You don’t just immediately move somewhere new and make so many friends that you feel comfortable playing hide and seek knowing about your ptsd problem in the span of like 11 months (not saying that’s impossible but just not likely).

The episode Party Animal where we see flaky and others prepare a party for his birthday aired October 2nd 2006 that means,of course that he turned 37 that day.

The last episode featuring Flippy was In Over Your Hedge that got released (for free) December 22 2018 and that would make him 49!

In conclusion Flippy throughout the whole series is in his early 30’s to late 40’s.

Im sorry in advance if some of this info is not right, i tried doing as much research as i could! If something is wrong pls say so i can correct myself!!! Also sorry if the grammar is wrong but English is not my first language😢

[loversberceuse]

Allow me to guide you through this experience.

The year is 20XX, and the world's population has finally succumbed to a disease. While such an event was expected, this disease didn't turn anyone into zombies or wipe out an entire population due to sickness. It is a sickness, sure, but nothing like what was expected.

It all started with a steep increase in crime.

At first, the constant murders and missing persons' cases went unnoticed. These things happen all the time, especially in big cities. As the amount of crime increased, so did the panic. With thorough research, which took about a year and a half to complete, the cause was discovered. This disease caused people to go insane, caused them to obsess over one singular person. They'd do anything and everything in their power, even murder, if it meant keeping the person they were so incredibly infatuated with close to them. In short, it turned people into what a person would call a yandere.

The disease spread rapidly throughout the world, leaving insanity and death in its wake. Despite the steps taken to counteract this, nothing helped. This disease continued to spread, continued to destroy what people used to know as their daily lives.

It's now been two years since the disease was officially announced on live television. While most of the world's population are now classified as yanderes, a few unaffected by the disease still remain. Among those few are, luckily for those reading, you! Somehow, you, the reader, have managed to make it this far. Congratulations! You've made some friends along the way as well.

Valkyrie, who you managed to save from an awful eye injury after some chaos in your hometown two months ago. While he did still lose his eye, he's still happy to come along and help keep you and the rest of the group safe. (TAG: lbValkyrie)

Lune, though apprehensive about joining this small group due to fear of catching the disease, has become a great friend to everyone in your little team. He dislikes being touched, though, so you've learned to keep your distance. (TAG: lbLune)

Elias is.. Well.. He's simply just someone you ran into one day. He seems fairly reserved, but is also probably considered the most "normal" of anybody else in the group. Not much else is to be said about him, he's an alright guy. (TAG: lbElias)

Your little squad has been just fine, everyone has managed to fend off any stray yandere along the way to safety. These guys do make everything easier, and finding supplies is much easier with more people around.

Lately, though, all three of them have been acting strangely...

Hello! Welcome to my blog! This is a two-sided yandere oc x reader blog! My friend, who will be writing for the other three, has their own blog for this as well (You can find it here) .Speaking of my dear friend, all art on my blog (unless said otherwise,) was made by them! (They can also be found here at @buriedpair )

[unknown-drug]

A GUIDE TO SURVIVE

All the things I wish someone would I told me before descending in this Hellhole.

🦋 ️ If you were thinking about diving into the EDs World for the first time, go back and think again (this is not worth it, I swear to every God in this universe. Just run as far as you can from it) But if sadly you are, you have to be completely educated.. Do some research about everything it consists of. Literally get as much information as you can (pros and cons, nutrition, exercises, side effects, long/short terms, overuses of anything, etc). There is so much more than diet and food involved, so just don’t be stupid about it.

🦋 ️EDs DON’T HAVE NUMBERS. Someone who is 200+ pounds is as valid as someone who is 100 and under. Stop bullying people because they are heavier or lighter than you are. Society fucks us enough so no need to add more hate. We are all in the same shit anyways… No one has the same body as you. Your number compared to others might not look the same. So yes, your thinspo is all cute but you have to consider all the criterias. Genetics, overall stats, gender.. Weight is just a number among many other things.

🦋 Weighing yourself every single day is NOT the most effective or accurate way to see/track results. The scale can shift up to 5 lbs a day (minus or plus, I know this is insane). Some specialists recommend doing it 1-3 times a week, always on the same day, so that you can see a more accurate graph of the fluctuation. (Keep in mind that you have to account for any hormonal changes/cycles when it comes to your result, I suggest comparing each week of your cycle with one another.)

🦋 You should consider using other methods to track your progress other than weighing yourself like a tape measurement can be really effective for body dysmorphia and if you have access to a gym ask them to check your body fat percentage. You would be surprised to see just how much it can help. Because at some point, the balance between muscle and fat is so small that physical change won’t be as noticeable. But seeing actual results from other means can really boost your mental state.

🦋 Those who will notice “the problem" won't be the ones you want. And those who are really there for you are not always the one you thought would be.. But do not throw away the help if you need it.

🦋 Do not beat yourself too hard if you slip up. It might get you to binge 10x harder, too. Nobody is perfect. We all binge once in a while. The weight did not appear out of thin air. It is a work in progress..

🦋🦋🦋

I know there is this big debate about the famous “body reset” metabolism day. Some say it helps others would disagree. It's the same thing when I come to fasts and detox/cleanse. At this point, you can follow whoever you wish. All of these help to some degree but aren't necessarily what your body needs. You need to have a good understanding of your system before committing to anything. To each their own.. All studies point to a “sort of reset” but there is not a universal way of doing it. So yes, here are your most common options, but this would depend on too many specifics to have a straight answer. There is no on/off switch when it comes to your body, yes it can feel like it “slowed down” but it is just because your body takes more time to use whatever it has to formulate energy. It takes your organism unequal time to synthesize different food - fat compared to carbs or even muscular tissues. This is why it is not just about the starvation aspect of your ED. It is also important to look at what you're feeding yourself with. Not all diets work the same and provide the same amount of energy. Choose your own path, but just be aware of all the knowledge you can put your hands on.

🦋🦋🦋

✨️✨️✨️ There is no magical pill, no tea bullshit and no fucking food miracle to lose weight. Yes there are some meds that can help (laxative, diuretic and appetite suppressant) but it is mostly out of side effect. Ultimately, your body will get used to them so they will feel like they aren't working anymore and you will feel the need to take more. Do not take more than the recommended amount. Be extremely careful if you are using them and please if you see anything out of the ordinary talk to professionals. Medications without the proper follow up can be horribly harmful in the long run. ✨️✨️✨️

🦋 TAKE YOUR FUCKING VITAMINS. I can't stress that enough but you need them just to make sure your body won’t rupture. It can prevent so many side effects to EDs and even trips to the hospital. Look for multivitamin, biotine, B-complex, folic acid (ladies), iron, potassium and magnesium… See to have some blood work done every year just to see where/or if you are lacking anything crucial.

🦋 DRINK YOUR GODDAMN WATER , BITCH. Your body will give up faster if you don't drink enough water compared to food. If you are fasting or anything, this shit is MANDATORY. And no, coffee, coke zero and teas should not count in your water intakes (sorry). It is so important for weight loss, plateaus and in general. The general rule is about 2L a day but you will need more depending on your lifestyle. There is many any calculators online or you can just go with the basic **1500mL - 20(weight in kg-20)= x**. It is the average amount in mL you should aim for.

🦋 Doing the same exercises over and over again will not help you lose weight. In fact, it is quite the contrary. You will have to switch it up, do cardio (even if it sucks), and try weight lifting (nooo it is not gonna make you look bulky.. Lean muscle burns more calories even though it weighs more.), find a sport that you like, yoga and pilates count, and even dancing is a good way to lose weight. You don’t have to spend endless hours in the gym (if you want to, go for it), 4 exercises is a good workout, and 30 mins a day every day is the bare minimum. Walking is quite underestimated but is actually pretty effective. Have fun with it cause it will be easier to stick to it and not dread it.

🦋 Sleep is MANDATORY. Don't think that staying awake all night doing exercises is helping you. In fact, your metabolism will go down 10 to 20 % if you sleep less than 6 hours a night. Get the rest you need.

🦋Food is not the enemy. When it becomes your aly it’s going to be a blessing. At the end of the day, you need the nutrients, So stop working against it and make it a tool for you to reach all your goals. It can get you the body that you want without too much work tbh.

🦋 ️ You guys have to stop with the famous “breakfast is the most important meal of the day”. If you were to look deeper into things you would know that the word originates from “breaking a fast” because it is the first meal after a long period of fast (when you sleep) depending on how long and everything but technically it still applies. So yes, it does help to kick start your metabolism, but there are many other ways to do so. Do what works for your lifestyle. Intuitive eating can really help with the disorder.

🦋Not all diets are going to work for you. Don't get discouraged. Try a few and see what works. Keep in mind to incorporate a little bit of every food group (if possible) to make sure you won't lack any crucial nutrients. Again, do your research.

🦋When reaching your GW or UGW, you may still feel unhappy. Yes, it feels like if you were skinnier, the world would turn around and become a wonderful place to be, but it’s not necessarily the case. It is not a magical way to solve all your problems, so be aware of possible disappointments.

🦋Keep yourself accountable. Stop blaming others or your life for things you have done. At the end of the day, you are the one doing everything. Excuses are not gonna help you achieve anything.

🦋The saddest part about this is that the sense of control is only temporary... If you have any other mental illnesses, it can mess you up so bad.. Mixing everything can be a lot at times, and I know how overwhelming it is to do all that by yourself. But, one way or another, you will have to go up against your demon and fight them or die trying.. Literally.

🦋This is not all rainbows and unicorn illnesses. It is hard to live through and even harder to witness it on someone else. You will cry, you will scream, and you will feel depressed and hopeless at times. Try to get someone you can talk to or vent to. This is why the online community is a huge part of EDs. Don't keep it all inside. It will break you.

🦋If you ever relapse after more than a year of recovery, you have to keep in mind that your body has changed. Especially if it went through puberty or if it is somewhere in your adulthood. If you plan on using the same old tricks you did as a teenager, I am sorry to announce to you that it might not work. Your relapse is like a whole new ED. You have to relearn everything about your body. It has adjusted to your harsh treatment and will definitely not cooperate the way it did before.

🦋If you are not ready mentally for recovery, it will NEVER happen. It cannot be forced. Recovery is the hardest part of the illness, but it is doable. And it takes time. It is not something that can be done overnight. Be patient, and at the end of the day, love yourself. But keep in mind that even fully recovered, the numbers won't magically stop in your mind. It will stay there as an afterthought. Some can live with it, and some can’t. If you need help, go get some.

🦋Calorie Counting🦋

So this is the most controversial topic of all but fuck it. This is my blog anyway I do what I want. Do with this information as you please. I am no doctor, just a bitch with a pharmacy and nutrition background.

🦋If you are to calculate calories, there are two crucial details you have to account for; your BMR (basal metabolic rate) and macronutriments.

🦋For macros, learn what they are and how to use them. It’s not just a question of fat, carbs, and protein. Look into understanding food labels and portion size and the percentages it represents in your daily food.. Especially when it comes to dry and wet food (ex: food labels on pasta and rice are for quantity when it is dry). It can really make a difference at the end of the day to have a good ratio of each group.

Most diets given by your trainers or dieticians are based on your BMR. Depending on how they calculated it, your exercise is already accounted for. So, in that case, you can not add your “active calories burned” from your smartwatch or whatever in your own calculations, thinking you can eat more or lose more. If you do so it’s going to nullify your progress for the day.

First, calculate your BMR (and no I’m not going to get involved in the gender debate, so use what you want).

Men= 66 + (6.23 x weight lbs) + (12.7 x height inch) - (6.8 x age in years)

Women= 655 + (4.35 x weight lbs) + (4.7 x height inch) - (4.7 x age in years)

Then multiplyz it by your activity level, and you will get your calories to maintain your actual weight. (1.2 = nothing, 1.375 = lightly, 1.55 = moderate). **I recommend just sticking with the lowest activity level possible since you want to know the minimum deficit of calories you can consume. So either do the 1.2 or not.

Now look into your goal. How much weight do you want to lose and by when ? The rough estimate is that 1 lbs = 3500 cals.

Let’s say you want to lose 10 lbs in 6 weeks. You will need to burn about 35,000 cal total in 6 weeks = 5,834 cal / week = 834 cal / day. (This is your deficit). Take your BMR again and subtract the last number to see how much your allowance is (ex: a BMR of 1800 means that your diet would be 1800 - 834 = 966 cal a day) It’s only a rough estimate. Because your BMR changes from day to day depending on the amount of stuff you do. If your deficit ends up negative, you need to revise your goal because on paper, it is unachievable and highly dangerous.

✨️✨️ Like I said , everything is just an estimate. Water weight and hormonal cycle are not included in this little math. ✨️✨️

🦋Purging🦋

You have to understand a few things before even thinking about doing it

🦋The biggest thing about purging is the long-lasting consequences. The acid in your stomach is extremely harmful. Think about it. It literally dissolves organic stuff to virtually nothing. There are a lot of medical problems that are linked to purging.

🦋The calorie absorption starts as soon as you begin chewing your food. There is acid that is released through your spit (yes, even if it is less acidic than your stomach, it is still there). So the famous method “chew and spit” is not the best because it is still harmful to your mouth health.

🦋 Purging is not a miracle erase switch. There is no Uno Reverse here. Even if you were to purge the entirety of your stomach, and that only a mere second after finishing eating, your body has already absorbed a portion of the calories ! A general rule is that about 1/3 to 2/3 of the calories will be left behind.

🦋 Now, even after all that you do purge, DO NOT BRUSH YOUR TEETH RIGHT AFTER. I swear to God that this is the worst thing you could do. 🦋

🦋If you were to ask the dentist when is the best time to brush your teeth in the morning, they would all agree that you can do it right after you wake up or 30-60 minutes after consuming food because of the acid mentioned earlier. Imagine how bad it would be after vomiting. So after a purge, you should try to swish some bicarbonate and water to bring the pH down and swallow half a glass to ease up your mouth, esophagus, and stomach. (I do 1 tbsp for 1 cup of water).

🦋Also, DO NOT PURGE if you don't drink enough liquid in your stomach. It is easier to do it when you do not only have solid shit in and less gross. Also it helps to reduce the acidity when it comes out.

🦋 Unfortunately, not all people have a gag reflex. Some studies show that nearly ⅓ of the population claim to feel it. Furthermore, it is shown that people who use any tobacco substance or other smoking substitute may be more prone to experience the lack of it. But it might also be that your body got used to your “mia” methods, thus being more resistant to where and how you are doing it. In that case, specialists point to other factors that can trigger it. So people will have a reaction caused by smell, others would find it with different stimulus points such as the roof of the mouth, back of the throat, tongue and near the tonsils. Moreover it can help to change the “tool” you are using (like going with something with a different texture like a cotton swab or the dental wood stick since it might help to trigger the reaction).

With that being said, if there is one thing you should remember about this whole thing is to be careful and aware.

Stay safe lovies. 🦋

[cementcornfield]

Brandon Aiyuk just signed!! Could this be a good thing for Ja’marrs case? (I hope so Bengals twitter is making me mad)

i saw!! thank god that particular saga is over lmao. but unfortunatley i’m not sure this is really going to move the needle much for ja’marr’s case since, i think in general, aiyuk is considered at least one tier below the caliber of receiver that justin, ceedee, and ja’marr are at. (but maybe this firms up the market a bit? one tier below = 30 million per, establishing that ja’marr NEEDS to be making more than that) 

and oh my god bengals twitter has me ENRAGED (going to use this ask to rant a bit under the cut, sorry!) 

ok like. i get it. the majority of us are never going to see the kind of money ja’marr is set to make, so i can understand the frustration people might feel. Especially with the fact that he WAS practicing, he WAS set for week 1, and now that rug has been pulled out from under us. everyone is understably upset. but being upset at ja’marr??? that’s bullshit in my opinion. he has so little power and leverage here, and he’s using what he can to advocate for himself against a CORPORATION with all the power! i’ve said it on here before, but it is insane to me to be on the billionaire owner side compared to a worker who is only ever going to make a FRACTION of the profits he brings to the league. 

and ugh, i keep seeing the argument: oh he has 2 more years on his contract! he’s being selfish for not honoring that! blah blah blah. ok, first of all, joe got a new deal when he had two years left on his rookie deal. no one batted an eye on that! and then you might argue, well, QBs operate under different rules, but! at least two receivers that i know of from ja’marr’s draft class, devonta smith and jaylen waddle, got their extensions this year! and that is GOOD for the team btw, it allows them to spread out all that money over more time, and eases the cap hits!! and waiting until the next year will ALWAYS raise the price! 

i’ve been doing some research on this and here’s what i understand about rookie contracts per the collective bargaining agreement by the nflpa…the owners negotiated the current system because they were mad that rookie contracts were getting out of control. guys were coming fresh out of college, never hitting the field, and were being paid absurd amounts of money!! and then sometimes, they’d be complete busts! but they’d still have to get paid. so the owners and nflpa collectively agreed on our current rookie contract structure, which is that rookies would make very little (comparatively) during their first four years (with first rounders have an added fifth year option that would add yet another year of control by the team). it became all about reaching the second contract for rookies, which is when they would really get paid what they had proven was their worth. PART OF THIS AGREEMENT!!! IS THAT ROOKIES ARE ALLOWED TO START NEGOTIATING A NEW DEAL AFTER THEIR FIRST THREE SEASONS PLAYED IN THE NFL!!!! this is part of what the owners agreed to!! this is one of the only advantages players get in trying to control what little they can!!! so FUCK EVERYONE who pulls that “he has two years left he needs to honor his contract” bullshit. this is part of the system that was agreed upon by everyone. ja’marr has EVERY RIGHT to negotiate for a contract that better reflects what he’s currently worth. and he is one of the best receivers in the league still making rookie money. why shouldn’t he try to get more?? 

why does he want it now? i was a little confused by that myself at first, because again, price only goes up, cap only goes up, he WILL get more next year (and if he has to wait until then, then fuck the organization and i hope he robs them blind tbh) (well no i don’t. i want him to get what is fair! which will be more next year unfortunately, sorry mike!!) and okay, we can’t know for sure, i always try to emphasize that we don’t really know any of these players and what their thoughts and motivations are. but if i had to guess, he’s just watched one of his best friends (tee) get completely screwed over by the organization (with a chance of him getting screwed again by a second tag btw!!) he saw another close friend, joe mixon, take a pay cut to stay with the team last year, have a productive season, and then the team got rid of him anyway. he saw jessie bates get tossed aside. he just saw evan take a deal that was definitely below market value. sure, the bengals say that ja’marr is different, that they’ll bend over backwards to pay him. but what proof does he have of that? how does he know that if he takes the risk of playing this year, he won’t get screwed over like the majority of players by this organization. and yes okay, that’s loaded language, the bengals aren't maliciously fucking everyone over of course, they’re just doing good business. but that’s what ja’marr wants to do for himself! and there’s no reason he shouldn't be able to! 

the bengals eventually (way way too late into the process) gave joe the deal he wanted. mike brown called joe the most important player and said that ja’marr was right after that in importance. so ja’marr wants to see if he means that. he wants to see if he really is respected and valued by this organization. good for him! and while he’s been using this "hold in" negotiation tactic, by all accounts he’s still been present and involved in the meetings and at practice as a coach-like figure. he’s been upbeat, positive, and DISCRETE (unlike other receivers this contract cycle 🙄). he finally starts practicing again, per his agent as a sign of good faith. and i can only imagine that the organization threw this back in his face with some lowball offer or refusal to continue negotiating, so now he’s back to holding in. so fuck mike and duke for that! in particular! 

woof ok this was way too many words and no one will read this. but god i just hope they get this resolved. i want ja’marr to practice. i want him to play in all the games he can. i want him to beat the chiefs!!! let’s just hope the organization finally comes around and gets their shit together. and until then, bengals twitter better put some respect on ja'marr's name!!

[trashcanwithsprinkles]

Now that CN is over I need more fics to read (I say as if I'm not in the middle of rereading CN and plan to reread ITYSG(AINLY) again because I'm literally obsessed with your fics). Do you have an recs? Also what's your favorite fics/comfort fics (you can include your own)? I always find it interesting to know what the authors of my favorite fics like to read when they aren't writing.

other than my other fics (babysitting in the apocalypse is my other zhongchi fic), i do have a some zhongchi recomendations! sadly i cannot actually go to my bookmarks atm nor provide direct links. i also don't really remember the authors' names of most of them? and you'd have to like.... save them for later, what with ao3 being down and all;; but here are some off the top of my head if you want to get planning:

(once ao3 gets back up i'll update this list with proper links and the authors' names and maybe more recomendations since i do have many more i just can't remember,,)

○ entirely out of spite by Bgtea - i generally assume everyone's already reading this one given how big it is (and how it was kind of my inspiration for cyanide even tho i never said it), but if you're not, holy shit are you in for a good one. literally anything bgtea makes is wonderful. this one is an au based on the premise of a different story, but you don't need any knowledge whatsoever of it to enjoy and understand eoos (tho consider it if you like the premise, bc it's also really good). the rundown is- a mondern ajax dies and wakes up in the body of tartaglia, the antagonist of genshin impact, a game he'd been playing before kicking the bucket. he is tasked by a weird isekai-anime looking menu to fill in the shoes of the antagonist or else, but he's not technically stopped from altering the story just a tiny bit or being ooc, so he goes about trying to play the tartaglia role without meeting the same end as tartaglia (who dies ingame). it's such a good fic i cannot recommend it enough - it's not complete yet, but the wait for each chapter is more than worth it, and bgtea always does an insane amount of research for everything they post.

○ literally any other zhongchi fic by Bgtea. there's this short one about pulcinella or capitano (i can't remember, it might've been pantalone) selling pictures of childe to increase morale in the fatui (something something pr strategies), that one is hilarious. there's another one about zhongli getting stuck as a dragon and childe taking care of him as the world slowly goes to shit from rex lapis being missing (a comment pointed out it might be called "ajax' adventure with dog-lizard" and it sounds about right for me). another one they have is the autumn winds are sighing i think. that one was posted WAY back, some of the info is a bit outdated, but it's still so, so good. i can't remember what it was all about, but i do remember it involves zhongli going to snezhnaya to meet childe's siblings. the pining and tension on that one is off the roof. i should read it again,,,

○ after everything by Amanveth (i think that's how their username is written,,) - literally palate cleansing fluff. there's really good angst as well but it's overall just very sweet and soft, very much a feel-good fic. it's about zhongli and childe going back to being friends after the events of the archon quest and slowly realizing they're in love. it's still ongoing but it updates shockingly fast, and it's a nice little thing to read before going to sleep.

○ the white cicada society by clementinesgulag. still ongoing i think, but i have paused reading it for reasons unrelated to the fic itself, so i can only really atest to the frist arc of it? but holy fuck is the first arc good. the angst is godly in this one, and i'm always a sucker for a good horror mystery. this one is about the gritty and slow reconciliation of post-archon quest zhongli and childe as they investigate a series of awful murders and terrifying paranormal shit (i'm pretty sure) going on in the city. (it might be revealed to not be paranromal later in the fic as that partiuclar plotpoint hadn't yet resolved when i paused it at the end of the first arc, but i wouldn't know. wouldn't make it any less good if it wasn't tho)

○ death became him by Merianon. also still ongoing i think, but part of the many fics i have paused reading for reasons unrelated to them (i have... way too many saved,,,). this one is about childe going back in time after dying and waking up as a god, and the fic starts there, so it's about how the events of the game go with childe as a god and not in the fatui. i can't remember all that much about it tbh, but i remember i really liked it, the concept was so interesting. i'm waiting for it to end.

○ a sight for sore eyes by ToumeiKyoudai. still ongoing afaik, but i paused reading it as of very recently (again for reasons outside of the fic). this one is the events of the game except childe is legally blind. you have no idea how interesting and hilarious this fic is, the premise is so simple but it's so nicely executed. i can't really say all that much more about it since it's basically just that- it's a retelling but childe's blind. and he's so fucking funny. it's all so fucking funny, and the worldbuilding is stellar, and i just really really like it i can't explain why exactly. it's not a comedy! but fuck it's so entertaining.

i have so many more that i wish i could put here but i'm not 100% confident in their titles nor which fic was which (happens when you have a ton bookmarked but have paused reading a lot of them), so i don't want to risk saying this fic is one thing when in reality it's something else completely different,,,

these last two i put below for reasons i'll explain in each of their blurbs, but they're still as recomended as those above!

○ lungs full of roses, by SecretlyACatLady. if this is the title (and i'm 99% certain it is, but i can't check), then this is hands down the BEST hanahaki angst i've ever read. i'm not kidding. this one is very specific in its angst tho, and i gather likely not what everyone is looking for in a hanahaki fic, but holy fuck. basically childe gets hanahaki here but knows he cannot afford to have anyone find out he has it (bc fatui) and also not that he died from it, i think? might be mistaking that particular plotpoint for another fic. anyway- he leaves liyue but zhongli goes to look for him bc he's confused and just wants to apologize for the whole tsaritsa's contract and all. it gets out of hand real quick when the ppl of mondstadt try to help by acting as pushy wingmen and it's so GOOD holy fuck. i've never liked when other characters try to push the main pair together and act all 'just kiss already we all know!' around them, and seeing it backfire as horribly as it could if it were a realistic scenario (tho enhanced bc childe) is so incredibly satisfying. the reason why i put it down here is 1) i'm not 100% sure that's the title and 2) if it hasn't been abandoned, it's been in hiatus for a while now. which is hearbreaking, but it's also such a good fic that i'd honestly recommend it regardless if only for the angst at the start. but i understand not everyone is in for something like that if it doesn't resolve/likely won't resolve (idk if it's abandoned tho but i understand that if a fic takes too long to update, people will fear the worst). so yeah,,

○ non-playable character, by Jouicifer. this one is here exclusively because i'm a sucker for horror mystery - it doesn't mean the zhongchi isn't good, but it's not as prevalent in the plot as in white cicada (another horror mystery), so i can't exactly put it with the other more zhongchi-centric fics? not that the zhongchi isn't here, but. hard to explain. this one is also hard to explain in general, i'm not sure if it's based on the premise of another story or if this is a highly-secific trope/sub-genre in china (i think?), but the author refers to it as 'unlimited flow', so look it up if you want to be sure. either way, much like with eoos, it doesn't matter if you know anything about whatever that might be to enjoy and understand the story. the rundown is childe and a bunch of other people are players in this sort of virtual-reality scenario hopper, where they get put in 'games' with other players where they can die (tho idk if die die irl as well). basically, in the newest scenario they get thrown into, it's a horror murder mystery about a haunted mansion, and their guiding npc is zhongli, whom childe has met in another scenario and whom he is an absolute simp for. god idk how to explain it, it's just so good; but you need to be there for the plot first and the ship second. the ship is there! it's just the plot takes presedence. but holy fuck is the plot good. the reason why it's down here, like lungs full of roses, isn't bc of the plot or the ship being secondary, but... well, it's also been in hiatus for a long while now. to this fic's credit in particular, it was in a long hiatus before, but updated! out of nowhere! and then it went into its current hiatus, so. again, i understand people don't like that, but i'm a patient person so i'm willing to keep it in my bookmarks for as long as it takes (and forever if it gets abandoned). it's just THAT good. and since there's not much horror murder mystery in this fandom (or in fics in general), i'll take whatever i can get. the mystery is good in this one, so it helps.

(edit: added some authors and a fic title, thank you archon-of-chaos and redwormonastring!)

[castaway-achlys]

Castor's Backstory!

Warnings!

If you are uncomfortable with dark topics, this may not be for you. Please also keep in mind that this is quite long, around 2200 words, and only really encompasses Castor's background. Please let me know if I have missed anything regarding triggers.

Triggers include: genetic experimentation and modification, medical horror, marital issues, child abuse, racism (their mother hates fae), corruption, manipulation, deception, lying, a narcissistic parent (their mother), monsters (phantoms), body horror, self harm, bodily mutilation, disrespect for the dead, severe neglect, starvation, death, blood, torture, mental trauma, forced hormone therapy, isolation, gender inequality, overblotting, and brief mentions of dysphoria.

Castor and Pollux were born to parents Astraia and Iason Achlys on the 22nd of May under the star sign of Gemini. Though, upon seeing the results of Astraia's alleged modifications in the pursuit of the twins' health, it was impossible to ignore what she'd done. The beloved twins that Iason had waited so long to see... were now freaks of nature.

One twin was incredibly small despite both Astraia and Iason being rather tall, though still average humans. The other? Not outrageously large, but definitely shocking considering the stature of the other.

Iason was a bit outraged at his wife. The small female twin he'd dubbed as Castor, upon closer inspection, had pointed, fae-like ears. It didn't take a genius to also notice that this baby was... strong, despite being a newborn. When Iason provided his finger for her to try to grab, she had an insane amount of grip strength. He wasn't in any danger of being harmed or having it broken by her just yet, but this was not normal.

On the other hand... Astraia couldn't care any less about her husband's opinion now that he'd found out of her experimentation. Her work had resulted in a success. That was all that mattered.

Almost immediately after the discovery of the twins, Astraia's corruption began to seep through the cracks of the elaborate mask she'd designed. Her marriage had been a consummation of her and her spouse's love at the beginning, but now that she was pregnant, it was simply a hoax; another addition to the compendium of deceit she was maintaining to everyone, even her employers.

Iason was kept in the dark, and was none the wiser as to her plans. To him, she was the perfect woman, intelligent and beautiful, and someone he deeply treasured. He was so happy and excited to see the child-- or children, they'd later discover-- that would be born into a home filled with love.

Everything, even down to her employers, became tools which Astraia used to wield her hate and create her own tool-- no, her own weapon. As a top researcher at STYX, she had access to many things, and with every injection, every manipulation of the DNA of the eggs developing inside her, she took another step down a path from which she could not return. The creation of monsters... both her twins, and Astraia herself.

Upon seeing further developmental stages, it became evident that one twin was progressing much faster than the other. Its milestones were much more akin to a developing fae than the other twin, who was on track to becoming a healthy human baby.

From the time Astraia began noticing the fae-like traits of one of her twins, she felt a mixture of delight and disgust. She vehemently hated fae, regardless of what anyone would tell her or say. They were lesser, monsters, vermin. Even as they integrated into the world, and even if some of them had become her "friends," her co-workers... they were nothing short of scum that had taken the lives of so many humans in the past. Having one of those... those pests, growing inside her? Even if it was mostly human, it was still disgusting.

She defiled many bodies, both of her own twins and of deceased fae who had donated their bodies to science, using both in tandem to corrupt the unborn Castor and Pollux into her own monstrosities. Guilt barely crossed her conscience as she asked her husband what she'd like them to look like. Iason was admittedly unnerved by the question, but she coaxed him into telling her what he hoped the two would look like. After being assured nothing would go wrong, that she was simply ensuring their hair and eyes would be as desired, he finally gave into her wants.

One twin, the girl, would have one of Astraia's two eye colors-- bright pink-- and Iason's own dark blue hair. The other twin, the boy, would have her other eye color, a gentle blue, and opposite hair to his sister's, a bright pink. This way, both twins had her eyes, and one of the twins had his hair, and they would always be connected and recognizable by their opposite features.

Her true work began after that, in which she began injecting them with everything she'd prepared; at least, until she hit a roadblock. The larger and more human-like of the two, who would later be named Pollux, had been rejecting most of her edits. It was frustrating, but at least one of them, who would become Castor, was showing signs of success.

Immediately after Iason had a moment with his twins, they were whisked away to be cleaned up, though this was the last time Iason would see either of his beloved children for quite some time. Under the guise of ensuring their health, and now that he knew a little of what she'd done, she locked the twins away.

Despite screaming and crying, pleading with their tiny voices until their poor throats were raw for their mother's love, neither twin saw heads or tails of her. They were merely tests, and only fed enough to be healthy in these critical stages so soon after their births. Neither twin was given the opportunity to become attached to any worker that tended to their needs either; it was a new one each time. 

Nobody could fight back against Astraia, lest she terminate the experiment-- meaning their lives were at risk if anyone so much as snuck in to feed them, and thus, as they grew, neither twin knew how to speak. They only ever cried to alert someone to their needs. No sounds, no babbling, no words. 

The very first time they spoke, and for a long time after, they only uttered jumbled, incoherent medical terms they'd heard.

By the time that they could walk, the torture and torment to their small bodies had long since commenced. One twin, Castor, outshined the other, Pollux, in terms of results, but Pollux outshined Castor in terms of personality. He'd begun speaking a lot more, and had become very friendly, while Castor remained eerily silent. Her eyes were dark and devoid of life despite her young age, though Pollux made up for it with his immense amount of child-like curiosity and wonder for the world. Despite what happened to him, Pollux maintained a kind heart and sweet demeanor, while Castor only grew cold towards the world, except her brother.

Only Pollux could make a shimmer appear in her cruel, calculating gaze.

Around the age of 5, Castor's world would grow a thousand times darker. Pollux was released from the facility to live with Iason, who put him in school and began immediately atoning for the fact both of them had been without each other for 5 long years. 

Meanwhile... Castor began the next stage of experimentation, where Astraia introduced phantom-- monster-- DNA to what she had already been doing, including hormone therapy. She'd been making Castor into a boy as much as she could without touching the child's body to surgically "fix her." Men were simply stronger, and she didn't intend to stop until Castor was more manly. Castor naively assumed this was normal. She was never told her own gender, much less taught about gender and identity.

Pollux had rubbed off on her, and now that she was older, Castor knew how to speak. She copied Pollux, and used her newfound words the only way she knew how-- to scream. To beg. To cry. To plead for mercy, for the torture to cease as her mother injected her small veins with a black tar-like substance that felt like fire, burning her from the inside out. It swallowed her whole, forcing her to quickly accumulate blot and pushing her body to the limit.

Her untrimmed nails clawed at her pale skin, digging into the flesh until scarlet liquid trailed down her arms as she attempted to stop the pain that seared and slowly spread through her body, all the way to her core. Astraia simply watched her daughter's blood spill with an upturned nose and an air of disgust. This pathetic being, begging her for mercy, was something that came from her? It simply wouldn't do.

With a snap of her mother's fingers, workers forced Castor down and strapped her to the cold, unforgiving surface of the medical table, where she'd yell daily until her voice no longer worked, tear stains were plastered to her thin, underfed cheeks, and the tears themselves no longer had enough supply to continue their flow from her doe-like eyes that began, once again, to lose their light in the absence of her brother.

When the experiment-- at least for that day-- would conclude, Castor would be released from the restraints, only to inflict more damage to herself. It was allowed to continue until enough data had been collected regarding her healing process, and then it would begin the worst cycle of neglect Castor had ever experienced. 

Healing wounds, scabs, and scars all adorned her flesh until Astraia had grown sick of her fighting, and ordered workers to keep her strapped down for days at a time. During this period, Castor was denied food, water, attention, everything, and left to make a mess of herself and live in her own filth until people would unstrap her, drag her weak body up, and force her into a shower that felt like ice. Tubes were shoved down her throat without much regard for her safety, and food forced into her stomach, which would inevitably leave her throwing up from too much being fed too quickly after starvation.

As time passed, the workers would regret everything they did to her. Left on her own, in an imprisonment of white walls and artificial light, Castor grew feral, full of hatred and rage that coursed through her veins until one day, it stopped. On the outside, Castor was overblotting and committing atrocities, spilling the blood of workers, both innocent and guilty, but inside her mind was a comforting numbness that set in.

As Castor watched blood and light drain from the bodies of the people who had done this to her, a wicked smile stretched across her face. It was the worst outbreak the facility would ever see, both Castor and her phantom using magic that they'd not previously seen or known of to destroy entire sectors of the facility and squadrons of innocent fighters desperately trying to quell her anger.

Eventually, she was brought down, though not without consequences. As the price for destruction, Castor was forced in and out of an overblot state time and time again until her body could no longer withstand the sheer power it held, and gave out. It nearly resulted in her death, but the experiments simply continued without care from Astraia.

Over the years, visits from her brother became allowed once again, though it was during one of these visits that Castor, who had hit puberty at a young age, was finally informed of the things her mother had done. Normal girls bled, Castor did not. Normal girls did not have a significant change in their voice to make it lower, Castor did.

Once this had sunk in, it would take a few years before Castor did anything about it. Thanks to Pollux, who had grown so much, Castor did discover that she felt dysphoria and a disconnect from her birth gender, which was lucky for her considering the changes her mother had caused to take place in her body. Castor requested surgery to correct his breasts growing and make his chest flat, and had his matted, unkempt hair shaved off.

In solidarity for his new brother, Pollux, who already had longer hair-- though his was actually cared for-- continued to grow it out. If his brother felt down about his body and looks, Pollux would show Castor that his hair was long and pretty, and he was still a boy despite it.

It was small actions like this by his brother that gave Castor the strength to endure anything thrown at him, and to begin to calm the hatred that resided within him. It still very much raged silently in the very depths of his soul and threatened to seep through the cracks, but Pollux held him together despite his darkness.

Castor became much more docile, though not happy by any means. He simply allowed things to happen and trusted that he could make it through until the next time Pollux would be allowed to visit.

12 years passed, and Castor's progress, at least within the facility, had plateaued. In her benevolence-- which was mostly just to appease Iason, who threatened divorce and degrading her image-- Astraia allowed Castor to be freed.

Castor raced through school, absorbing so much knowledge that he graduated on time with his brother at the age of 17-- a mere 5 years spent on education that took most humans over a decade. During this time, he learned so much about the world and how humans worked... though nothing Iason tried-- medicine, therapy, support-- could heal the damage Astraia had done. Only his love and Pollux's could help Castor, who was stunted beyond belief.

[redrose10]

Part 1

Here is part 1 of this new story that I’m working on. I was going to post it as one big chapter, but I’ve received feedback that multiple chapters are preferred so that’s the route I went. I really hope that everyone likes it! This first part is very very angsty.

Inn Keeper Yoongi x Female Author Reader

Summary: You have never experienced true love which is hilarious considering you write romance novels for a living. When you end up staying at The Interlude Inn located in Holly Falls you start to wonder if maybe the answer to your newest love story is sitting behind the welcome desk. Quickly, you find out that Min Yoongi hides a lot of pain and sorrow behind his shy smiles and quick glances.

Warnings: (may get updated) Swearing, character death, very very angsty for a while, mentions of physical and verbal abuse, bullying, a really mean letter, panic attacks, eventual light smut, eventual fluff

Word Count: 9,602

Tag List: @viankiss

You slunk down in your office chair hanging your head low. Your boss had just chewed you out after you presented her with a draft of your newest novel that you had thought you were just about finished with, but it appears you were going to have to start from the beginning.

“I’m guessing it didn’t go as well as you thought it would?”, your best friend and coworker, Nari responded.

“She said that it’s not believable and that I need to use my own personal experiences as inspiration. I can’t keep writing the same story over and over just changing the names and location. The reader will be able to connect with it more if it’s from experience. I have two months to send her the new story or I’m on unpaid leave until I submit something worth publishing. It’s such bullshit.”, you huffed.

“I mean she kind of has a point. Anyone can put a bunch of words down on a piece of paper, but unless there is real feeling behind it then those words won’t get far.”

You rolled your eyes, “Seriously? You too? And what personal experience should I use?”

“Y/N you’ve been in relationships before. Just use one of them or a combination of all of them.”

“Oh yeah, should I go with the one who cheated on me or the one who ghosted me after he got me in his bed, or the one that would loose his temper at the smallest thing I did to upset him? I’ve never had a good relationship experience.”, you chuckle self deprecatingly.

“Hey Y/N, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to rub it in like that. Maybe try writing something else. Not every story has to be about a relationship, good or bad.”

Running your hands over your face you sighed, “I just don’t know what to do any more. I feel so burnt out and unmotivated. I don’t think I could come up with another story if I wanted to.”

“Why don’t you take a break? You know, get out of town for a while. I’m sure our boss won’t mind, especially if it gets you to clear your head and write something decent.”

Pondering this theory for a minute you began to think she might be on to something.

“Where would I go though? I can’t really afford to travel far and I don’t want to be too distracted that I can’t get anything done.”

After some silence Nari jumped up, “Oh I’ve got the perfect place. It’s just a four hour flight out to the countryside. A little town called, Holly Falls. My sister and her fiancé stayed there several months ago.”

Thinking it over a little it sounded like a good idea. After some begging and promising your boss that you were going to get work done while on the trip she agreed.

Once you arrived at the airport you really wished you’d done a little more research about Holly Falls. After some digging and a conversation with a very outgoing Uber Driver you found out that eleven months out of the year the town is very low key and relaxed, but for one month it is a tourist hotspot thanks to the insane amount of blooming cherry blossom trees. According to your new Uber friend, people come to Holly Falls during this month to see the fields of trees blooming in all their glory. The normally quiet town embraces the crowds providing various festivals and parades and gimmicks to draw in the guests as well as their wallets. And of course you just happen to travel over there smack dab in the middle of it all.

The driver dropped you off in the middle of the fun so with your bag slung over your shoulder you started heading into different hotels trying to book a room. In the city you could walk into pretty much any hotel at any time and book a room. You had assumed it would be same in this small town so you had decided to wait to book a room until you could see them in person wanting to get the feel and make sure you chose the right fit. You imagine in any other month it would be much easier to obtain a place to stay here, but due to the large tourist presence every single hotel was completely booked for the entire month.

You were just about ready to give up and head to the airport to see about booking a flight home when an older gentleman came up to you carrying various handmade trinkets for sale.

“See anything you like miss? All of these are under $10.”, he asked.

Politely you smiled, “No thank you. Not right now.”

You thought he had left until you saw him dangling a hand painted sun catcher in front of you. The design a beautiful beautiful cherry blossom. Trying to bite your tongue and not snap at the elderly man you again shook your head. “Here have it for free. You seem to need a little cheering up.”, he smiled.

Reaching up you grabbed the delicate glass from him, “Thank you. I really appreciate it. I’m sorry if I came off rude. I’m just really stressed out right now.”

“Didn’t know about the cherry blossom season and now you can’t find a place to stay?”, he asked. “How did you know?”, you replied wide eyed. The elderly man chuckled while taking a seat next to you, “There’s always at least one person that gets stuck here with nowhere to stay because they didn’t know how crazy things can get around here this time of the year.”

“Mmh yeah that would be me this year. I need somewhere to stay for a couple weeks or I’m going to have to head back home.” “You know there might be somewhere that still has a room available. It’s just outside all of the hubbub. About ten miles just over that hill. If you get to Taehyung’s Strawberry Farm then you’ve gone too far.”, he said pointing in the opposite direction of the festivities. “Really? You think they’d have a room? I wonder why they wouldn’t be booked like every other place.”

The gentleman stood up from the bench you were both on, “Its worth a shot. It’s a little farther away from all the action than people like to be. Plus the owners are a little on the unique side.”

You were concerned at this statement. The last thing you wanted to do was end up being the story line of a true crime documentary.

He continued, “They are very nice people. A young man and his grandmother. They just tend to be very secluded and to themselves. It’s called Interlude Inn. You can’t miss it.”

You thanked him for the information and watched as he walked into a large group of people trying to sell the rest of his merchandise. Placing the delicate sun catcher in your bag you ordered another Uber to take you over to the inn. A familiar vehicle quickly pulled up in front of you with the same talkative man from earlier. You wondered how there weren’t any other drivers available, but you smiled as you slid in the back seat anyways.

“Leaving so soon?”, he asked.

You chuckled, “No I just need to find somewhere else to stay. Can you please take me to The Interlude Inn?” Suddenly the man stopped, turning to look back at you.

“Miss you don’t want to stay there. Surely there’s somewhere else around here you can stay.”

“Every hotel is completely booked. If this inn doesn’t have a room then I’ll have to just go home.”

He sighed, “Alright miss. If you insist.”

He began the drive to your location. His words about finding somewhere else stuck in your mind.

“Sir?”

“Yes Miss”

“What you said earlier. What is so bad about this inn?”

“Well, the grandma, I think her name is Mae, is very sweet. She’s done the best she can with what she had. But that Min boy, he’s a little odd.”

“Ohhh…Like serial killer odd?”

The man chuckled, “No not that kind of odd. He’s just very quiet and keeps to himself, but he is polite. He’s never seemed to have any friends and I doubt he’s ever had any kind of relationship. He comes into town only a few times a year, mostly when his grandmother needs something. He doesn’t acknowledge anyone, even when they speak to him directly. People usually only stay at the inn as a last resort during this busy season.”

From what you’re hearing he seemed like just a quiet introverted person who loves his grandma. You weren’t sure why everyone seemed so leery of him.

The car pulled up infront of the inn. The large wooden sign out front verified you were indeed at The Interlude Inn. Thanking your driver you grabbed your bag and made your way up to the entrance.

The Inn looked cozy and welcoming. It was smaller than you had imagined. There couldn’t be more than three or four rooms. Off to the side you noticed a little garden with various plants starting to bloom.

On the door hung a welcome sign adorned with hand painted lady bugs and butterflies. Turning the handle you gently pushed in the door being greeted by a heavenly aroma making your stomach grumble. The entrance room which also doubled as a living room had two couches, one on either side of a coffee table. A television hung on the wall above a fireplace. In the corner was a small desk which you assume would be where you could request a room.

Walking over you noticed a younger man crouching down so he was eye level with one of the drawers. He appeared to be about your age, mid to late twenties. Black hair with a slight curl to it hung over his forehead. Beautiful cat like eyes and his soft lips formed into a deep pout. You wanted so badly to reach over and squeeze his chubby cheeks, but you knew that was a weirdness you didn’t want to invoke. He was fidgeting with a drawer that seemed to be stuck and you could here the argument he was having in soft whispers,

“Come on you stupid thing.”

“It shouldn’t be this difficult.”

“Please, I just need a pen and then I’ll leave you alone for the rest of the day.”

You chuckled hearing him begging the drawer to cooperate. Reaching into your bag you grabbed one of your spare pens and set it on the desk, “Here I have a pen you could use.”

The young man let out a sudden squeal after you startled him. He jumped backwards and landed on his behind with a loud thud.

“Oh no I am so sorry. I didn’t mean to scare you. I thought you had heard me come in.”, you apologized feeling terrible.

The poor guy sat on the ground trying to collect himself before bringing himself back to a standing position. That’s when you noticed his cheeks were a bright shade of red, making you want to squeeze them even more. The man didn’t say a word. His eyes were barely able to focus on you, instead they would move around the room before returning to you for just a second before he’d quickly look elsewhere.

“Ahh this must be the Min boy the driver was talking about?”, you thought to yourself. They weren’t kidding when they said he was quiet and reserved.

“Hi, I’m sorry again for scaring you. I was just wondering if you had a room I could rent for a couple weeks.”

The man just continued looking around the room.

“It’s okay if you don’t have any available. It was just recommended for me to come up here for a room since all the others are booked.”

Again silence. You were about to ask if he was okay when a door off to the left swung open and a very sweet looking elderly woman came walking out. She must be the grandmother that was mentioned. She was covered in flour so you assumed that’s where the heavenly smell was coming from.

“Yoongi dear did you get that pen yet? I need to label the jars of blueberry jam.”, she spoke. When she noticed you she jumped slightly, but not in a scared kind of way. More like an oh no how long have you been standing there while my grandson stares at you kind of way.

“Oh hi sweety, how can we help you?”, she asked. Her grandson, that you now knew was named Yoongi, was still standing off to the side. You had to intently stare at his chest to make sure he was still breathing because you were honestly getting very concerned for him.

“Yes ma’am, I was wondering if you had any available rooms that I could rent for the next couple of weeks?”

She smiled while pulling out an old and beat up note book to take down your info. You liked the old school feel. It was much different than the digital kingdom of the city where you lived.

“Of course dear. Did you need one bed or two?”

“Just one will be fine.”

“Okay and you said two weeks?”

“Yes please.”

“No problem. Just fill out your name and address here. Payment will be due at the end of your stay when you check out.”

Quickly you wrote down all the requested information before handing the book back over. You couldn’t help but notice that Yoongi still hadn’t moved, but his cheeks were still a bright shade of pink so you knew he was at least breathing.

The grandma spoke again, “Thank you so much dear. My name is Mae, but you can call me grandma, granny, halmeoni, MaeMae, just don’t call me late for dinner.”

Even though you’ve heard that joke countless times you still laughed. Something about this sweet woman warmed your heart.

She continued, “This is my grandson Yoongi. He can help you with your bags and show you to your room. You’re more than welcome to join us for dinner. It should be ready in about twenty minutes or so.”

You thanked her profusely and watched as she walked back into the kitchen. Yoongi walked around the desk without making eye contact. He reached for your bag that was currently sitting on the ground and you noticed a shake to his hand due to his nerves.

“Uh uh um y-you c-can follow me.”, he spoke before walking down the long hallway. He opened the door to small cozy room. A window sat overlooking the garden. A bed adorned with a lilac colored quilt sat against the wall. There was a dresser available for storage and a desk off to the side. It was perfect.

Yoongi laid your bag down at the foot of the bed. You wanted to ask him if he needed to lie down based on how terrified he looked. Instead you opted to try and get him to speak to you at all.

“Hi Yoongi, I’m Y/N. It’s really nice to meet you.”

You stuck your hand out offering a hand shake. It was getting awkward waiting for him to return the gesture, but just before you were going to dejectedly pull your hand back he reached up and took your hand in his.

With his cheeks back to bright red he quickly bowed and walked out of the room closing the door behind him.

Since dinner was going to be ready soon you opted to just lay in bed enjoying the comfort after a long day of travel. When Mae called you for dinner you entered the dining room surprised to only see her and Yoongi sat at the table.

“Am I the only guest?”, you asked suddenly feeling out of place.

“Yes dear, but don’t worry. We are so happy to have you here.”, she smiled pulling out a chair for you.

You nodded taking the offered seat while she filled up your bowl with some beef soup.

“So Y/N, what brings you to Holly Falls? I’m assuming it’s the cherry blossoms.”, she asked.

“Oh no I just needed to take a little vacation and clear my head. Having some work problems. My friend recommended this town to me. I didn’t even know about the cherry blossoms until I got here.”

“Well you’re going to love it here. There’s no more of a relaxing place.”

You smiled and accepted the second helping of soup. The two of you kept the conversation going talking about this and that. Yoongi never said a word. Out of the corner of your eye you noticed him sneaking little glances in your direction before quickly turning his head but you chose to ignore it, not wanting to embarrass him.

After dinner you offered to help clean up the kitchen which was greatly appreciated. Mae sent Yoongi out to the garden to collect some chamomile to make tea. As she rinsed off the dishes you would take them and dry them before putting them in their respective spots.

“Thank you for being gentle with Yoongi.”, she spoke breaking the silence.

You weren’t quite sure what she meant by that and apparently your face showed it because she continued,

“He really is such a caring and sweet young man. He’s just been hurt so many times and he’s so afraid of letting someone in for fear of it happening again. I worry what will happen to him when I’m no longer here. I don’t want him to be alone. He deserves the world and I hope that one day he finds someone that will give it to him.”

You wanted to ask questions, but felt it wasn’t a good idea to pry when you’ve only known this family for a few hours.

“He seems very sweet. I’d love to get to know him more.”, you responded.

“Oh please do. Go slow, but I think if you keep at it he just might open up to you. As soon as you went to your room he came to me and said you seemed like a very genuine person.”

You felt your cheeks heat up at the thought.

“Do you know if he has any interests or anything? Maybe something I could ask him about.”

She lightly chuckled, “Well he loves music. He has these notebooks that he’s always writing lyrics in, but he has never let anyone look at them. He likes basketball. He was really good when he was younger, but he doesn’t play it much any more. Oh! And you’d never guess it but he likes to knit. He’d be furious if he ever found out I told you that so you didn’t hear that one from me.”

You nodded in agreement before putting the final plate away just as Yoongi returned with the requested chamomile. He shyly smiled at you before nervously running out of the room. After enjoying a cup of tea you said goodnight and made your way back to your room for the evening.

The following morning you cranklily padded to the dining area. Mornings were not your thing. Thankfully you were greeted with the smell of coffee and fresh baked bread. Mae was nowhere to be seen, but Yoongi was standing at the counter chopping some vegetables for what you presumed was an omelet based on all the ingredients in front of him. You stood in the doorway thankful that he hadn’t noticed you yet as it gave you a chance again to admired his features. You smiled at how the tip of his tongue poked out in concentration as he focused on chopping an onion.

Silently you walked up next to him and smiled, “Anything I can help with?” The poor thing nearly jumped two feet in the air also letting the knife slip which sliced the tip of his thumb. When you saw the small amount of blood coming to the surface you panicked.

“Oh my goodness I am so sorry Yoongi. I didn’t mean to scare you like that. What was I thinking?”, you said grabbing his hand and pulling him over to the sink. He hadn’t said a word.

After thoroughly washing the cut and using a paper towel to dry it you asked if there were any bandaids. Shyly he pointed underneath the sink and you found a first aid kit.

“Okay this might sting a little.”, you said applying the disinfectant. You felt awful when you saw his body flinch. After the cut was securely wrapped in a bandaid you began apologizing again, “I’m so sorry Yoongi. This is not how I intended for this to go. Are you going to be okay? Does it hurt still? Is there anything I can do?”

For the first time since you arrived you saw a full blown smile on his face. He shook his head, “N-No thank you. I think I’ll be okay.”

“Well let me help you prepare breakfast. It’s the least I can do.”

After some hesitation he agreed so you cleaned up the work station and got a new cutting board before you got to work chopping the rest of the vegetables. When breakfast was over and you had helped clean up you decided to go back to your room for a while and try to get some work done. Unfortunately things weren’t going that great. You were still struggling to put together a decent storyline and after two hours of staring at your laptop you decided to give up and take a break.

Peaking out the window you noticed Yoongi working in the garden. He looked adorable in his overalls and dark green sweater. A matching green beanie on to give a little more warmth. You wondered if he had knit it himself. You grabbed your jacket and decided to head outside for some fresh air.

Not wanting a repeat from the morning you loudly made your presence known as to not startle him again. Only when you were sure that he had noticed you did you decided to say something.

“What are you working on?”, you asked crouching down next to him.

He whispered something that you couldn’t quite catch. You noticed the redness intensifying in his cheeks too. He was just so incredibly cute.

“What kind of seeds are these?”

“Oh they are um cabbage and um radish seeds.”, he said without looking up from the dirt.

“Hmmm I know nothing about gardening, but isn’t it still too cold to plant these? I always thought it needed to be hot for seeds to grow.”

“S-Some s-seeds can grow when it’s colder out. Then we’ll h-harvest them and p-plant the rest.”

“Ahhh I see. I never even knew that was possible. What else are you planting?”

Did you care about gardening or seeds or soil quality? No absolutely not. But this was the most Yoongi has spoken to you so you rattled off question after question and made odd comments here and there just to get him to keep talking. By the time you were done his face was beet red and his hands were shaking quite a bit more than earlier. You were starting to feel bad and like you were pushing him past his breaking point so you wanted to give him some space.

Standing up and brushing the dirt off your knees you said, “Well it’s gotten quite chilly out. I’m gonna head inside. Thank you for teaching me so much. Maybe one day I’ll have a garden and you could come see it for yourself.”

He nodded without looking up at you and you took that as his way of saying goodbye. Once inside you found a smiling Mae standing in the kitchen.

She handed you hot bowl of leftover soup for lunch and sat at the table next to you.

“You know, that’s the longest I’ve ever seen him converse with someone other than me in a long long time. Normally he’d just get up and walk away without saying a word.”

The thought of asking about Yoongi’s past crossed your mind again, but you pushed it aside still not feeling that it was the right time.

The next couple days followed a similar path. You’d wake up, help Yoongi make breakfast, try to work for a little, and then you’d go find Yoongi and try to talk to him and get him to open up to you. He never said much but he’d nod or say a word here or there to let you know he was listening. Mae would always be amazed at how well Yoongi responded to you. After a while you’d give him some space and then join the two of dinner followed by tea and then you’d head off to bed.

On the fifth day you decided to go out and explore a little. You ended up at Taehyung’s Strawberry farm which was just up the road from the Inn. Taehyung or Tae as he told you to call him was a very kind and outgoing guy. The farm had been passed down in his family for six generations. He gave you a tour of the entire farm and introduced you to his farmhands/friends Jin, Hoseok, Namjoon, and Jungkook. Jin was in charge of harvesting the strawberries and also coming up with new items to sell at the onsite bakery. Hoseok or Hobi as he was called was in charge of maintenance of the crops, things like making sure they got enough water but not too much water and pruning the plants where necessary. Namjoon was the bookkeeper. He kept track of orders and anything numbers related. Jungkook was the youngest of the four. According to Tae, he was the muscle of the group and would do various things around the farm that involved a lot of physical strength.

They all seemed like very sweet gentleman and made you feel very welcome from the start.

“So what brings you all the way out here? Most people try to stay closer to the main town this time of year.”, Jin asked setting a strawberry cream puff in front of you.

“I wasn’t able to get a room in town so I’m staying at The Interlude Inn.”

“I see. With Mae and Yoongi? How are they doing? I’ve been meaning to stop by and drop off a strawberry pie for them.”

“They seem to being doing well. They’ve been so hospitable.”

“Even Yoongi?”, Jungkook said taking a seat next to you. You noticed a hint of a chuckle in his question.

“Yes even Yoongi. He’s on the quiet side, but I think he’s starting to warm up to me a little bit.”

“Wow he must really like you then. I’ve been trying to get him to open up for years.”, Taehyung said walking over.

“What do you mean?”, you asked confused as to why everyone always seems to think he’s some cold jerk.

He continued, “We’ve just been trying to get him to hang out with us for the last few years. I’ve offered him multiple jobs around here. We’ve invited him over for dinner or to go get drinks in town. Namjoon tried to set him up on a date with his sister. He just always turns and walks away without saying a word. We’ve kind of just given up.”

“Oh yeah I guess maybe I’m just special then.”, you said before taking another bite of the cream puff.

It was pretty late by the time you had gotten back to the inn. Jin had given you a ride back as it looked like there was an early spring thunderstorm about to hit. When you walked inside you set the strawberry pie on the counter. Mae had already gone to sleep, but Yoongi was sitting in the common area watching a basketball game. He looked so cozy wrapped up in a hoodie that was a little too big for him and a fluffy fleece blanket on his lap. Now that you thought about it he was always dressed very warmly. Sweatshirts, sweaters, or multiple layers all with long sleeves. You’ve never seen any skin other than his hands and neck and face. It was on the chilly side being that it was barely the beginning of the spring, but nothing that you thought warranted that kind of clothing constantly. It was odd to you, but nothing you wanted to question him about right now because maybe it was just a comfort thing for him you thought. Instead you walked over to the couch making your presence known so that you didn’t startle him.

“Mind if I join you?”, you asked. Silently he scooted over to make room and you took that as a yes. You watched the game for a few minutes trying to come up with something to say, but you really didn’t know much about basketball or sports in general.

“Is that Michael Jordan?”, you asked after the camera followed a player who had just scored a basket.

Yoongi’s eyebrows furrowed as he shook his head.

“Lebron James?”

He shakes his head.

“Steph Curry?”

Again another head shake.

You chuckled, “Well those are the only basketball players I know so I give up.”

Out of the corner of your eye you saw the slightest smile from on his lips which you took as encouragement to continue.

“Oh so did he just score a touchdown?”, you asked. In reality you knew that was a completely different sport, but you were hoping that somehow this would get a little engagement on his part.

You looked at him expectantly noticing his cheeks heat up under your stare.

“Umm n-no that was a free throw, not a touchdown.”

“Hmm and a free throw is worth one or two points?”

“It’s w-worth one point.”

You didn’t want to over stress him out so you decided to give him some quiet and stop with the questions for a while.

The referee in the game blew his whistle and started making a bunch of hand gestures. You were about to lean over and ask about it when a bright flash of light shown through the windows followed by a loud clap of thunder. The floor beneath your feet seemed to shake from the force. Another flash of light lit up the room and some more thunder hit making even you jump a little.

“Wow that’s some storm.”, you said looking over at Yoongi only to be met with nothing.

“Yoongi?”, you question looking around the room wondering how he was able to get up and run so fast.

After standing up from the couch and walking towards the kitchen to see if maybe he had went in there you saw the fleece blanket he was holding earlier leaning up against the back of the couch and thanks to the added light from another lightning strike you noticed that the blanket was also covering a lump. Getting closer you saw little tufts of black hair poking out. Gently you reached and pulled the blanket down slightly. You could feel your heart breaking seeing him like this. Curled up in a ball with his hands over his ears and tears on his cheeks.

“Yoongi it’s okay. It’s just a thunderstorm.”, you said trying to soothe him. When your words didn’t seem to help you went to reach for his hand feeling him tense at your touch.

“No please don’t hurt me. Please.”, he cried out making you recoil. “Yoongi it’s Y/N. I’m not going to hurt you. Just let me get you to be-.” You felt a hand on your should and found Mae looking down at you with a sad expression on her face. She bent down the best she could in her old age to get his attention and when he finally recognized her the tension seemed to leave his body, at least momentarily until another crack of thunder rang through the air.

Mae helped him up off the ground and you’d stayed m back watching as she helped him down the hall, his legs shaking ever so slightly. Just before they entered his room Mae turned to you and pointed towards the kitchen. You took the hint and went to get a couple cups of tea ready.

After about fifteen minutes she returned and took a seat next to you thanking you for the tea.

“I’m sorry you had to see that.”, she sighed.

“No I just, I don’t, I…”, you couldn’t find the words. You knew it was slightly odd for a grown adult to be that petrified of a thunderstorm, but you knew there must be a reason. Judging by Mae’s reaction this seemed to be a common occurrence. You just didn’t know how to move forward without sounding rude.

“Mae, please forgive me if this comes off to forward or harsh, but has some thing happened to Yoongi in his past?”

She took a sip of tea before getting more comfortable in the chair and nodding her head.

“Yes dear. Yoongi, my sweet sweet Yoongi, has been through a lot. More than any person should have to especially at his young age. You see Yoongi’s father left a few weeks after he was born. Yoongi was born too early and was very small and sickly. His father didn’t want any part of his life. My daughter did the best she could with Yoongi. I helped whenever I could as well. She was such a loving mother. When Yoongi was about two years old she married a man who I didn’t necessarily approve of, but there was nothing I could do. She was an adult and she seemed happy. He quickly moved my daughter and Yoongi to the other side of the country. I only got to see them a couple times year. I started to have suspicions that something was wrong when Yoongi was four years old. I went to visit and noticed that my daughter and Yoongi both had old bruises. When I questioned it my daughter claimed that she tripped while carrying him and fell down some stairs. Then when Yoongi was six he told me how he had heard his mom and stepdad in their bedroom making lots of noise. His mom was yelling and there were loud bangs, but he couldn’t hear what she was saying. I questioned her once again and she said that her and her husband must’ve just gotten too loud while in bed together and that she’d remind him in the future that they needed to be quieter. I wasn’t completely convinced, but I had no other proof.”

Mae took a long breath clear that this was hard for her to recall and you were starting to feel guilty for even asking.

She continued on, “When Yoongi was about seven his mom got very sick and unfortunately passed away. I tried to visit him more, but as time went on his step dad cut me off more and more. I tried getting a court involved, but he was considered his legal guardian and without any significant proof there was nothing they could do. So I tried to do what I could. Over time I noticed a change in Yoongi. He was sadder, seemed more down on himself. I rarely ever saw that smile that used to melt my heart. He was having a hard time at school. The friends he had stopped hanging out with him. Then one day when he was around thirteen he said something back to his stepdad and his stepdad beat him so badly the neighbors ended up calling the police because of the noise.”

She stopped to take a shaky breath. Tears forming in her eyes. You hadn’t even noticed that you had started biting your bottom lip trying to stop your own tears from falling until the subtle taste of blood hit your tongue.

Once again she continued, “Thankfully his stepfather was arrested that night and eventually sentenced to forty five years in prison, but it was already too late and the damage was done. When I got to the hospital that night they started showing me different x-rays and scans and going over Yoongi’s injuries. It was worse than I had ever thought. There were old fractures that hadn’t healed correctly. Scars both fresh and old covered his body from where his stepfather would beat him with a tree branch or use his skin to put out his cigarettes. He had torn his shoulder at one point and because it was never properly taken care of he’s always in pain, even to this day. He had surgery to correct it, but it only helped a little. I cried in the hospital. He was released after a week and came to live here with me. I was taking him to therapy a couple times a week and he seemed to be getting on the right track. He was smiling more and getting a little more talkative. I had enrolled him in the high school here and he made a couple friends. I knew there’d always be a part of him that struggled, but I thought that maybe he was going to be able to move past all of this for the most part and go on to have a happy healthy life. When he was in his second to last year of high school there was going to be a big dance and after some convincing he asked a girl to go with him as a date and she said yes. So I got him a brand new suit and the day of the dance we went and picked out a beautiful bouquet of flowers. I offered to drive him, but he didn’t want to be embarrassed by his grandma driving him around, you know how teenagers are. So I watched him walk out the door.”

Mae took a moment to composer herself by staring out the kitchen window. You in no way wanted to rush her.

She took another sip and then went on, “I was in the kitchen a little while later when I heard the front door swing open and slam back shut. I thought it was much too early for Yoongi to be home already and assumed it must be some guests so I cleaned myself up real quick and walked out to greet them, but instead…instead I found Yoongi with tears streaming down his cheeks and then I noticed his suit was covered in brightly colored paint. He still had the bouquet of flowers in his hand except they were now all damaged and dirty. He refused to tell me what happened and ran off to his room. Monday morning I went to the school and apparently the girl and some of her friends, including her actual date, were all waiting for Yoongi to show up at the school. When he got there they all poured cans of paint onto him and called him a freak and a monster. I was told that one of the other boys saw Yoongi’s scars when they were changing for gym class and started making fun of him for it. This girl had no intention of actually going to the dance with him and told him he was ugly and would never be loved because of the way he looked. I tried to have all of those kids reprimanded, but Yoongi refused to cooperate so the school said their hands were tied. He begged me to take him out of school and homeschool him instead which I did, but he’s been pretty much to himself ever since.”

By this point you were full on balling your eyes out. You hadn’t known him for very long, but you could just tell that he was such a sweet gentle person. You didn’t think there could possibly be any thing else that Mae could tell you, but she cleared her throat and went on,

“Honestly, I think the worst thing that ever happened to him was the letter he received from his biological father on his twenty first birthday. I actually still have the letter. I’ve been holding onto it because I think it would be beneficial for Yoongi to be the one to destroy it, but I don’t know how to bring it up to him.”

She slid the letter across the table to you. Shakily you opened it up and immediately noticed the tear smudged ink and you took a deep breath trying to compose yourself before diving in,

“To Yoongi,

You most likely have no idea who I am, but I am your biological father. I left not long after you were born and if my calculations are correct you should be twenty one years old today. You were born early, somehow I’m certain that was your mothers fault even though the doctors said it was not. Anyways, you were born very small and sick. The doctors did not know if you would make it and to be honest I spent most of the time hoping that you wouldn’t. I did not want the burden of having a son, especially a first born, that was weak and useless. I gave your mother an ultimatum, either abandon you and we will move on and have a child that will prosper and do well in life or she can keep you and I will leave. Obviously you see what she chose. I heard that your mother has passed away since then. She was an ignorant woman anyways, wasting her time with a child like you. I told her that you weren’t worth the time which has been proven by the fact that you still live with your grandmother working at that stupid inn. You’ll never be anything more than that. I don’t really know the point of this letter any more. I guess I’m just a little drunk and wanted to get this off my chest after all of these years. Yoongi, I do wish you well. Truly I do because I know deep down that you’ll never achieve it. With regret, Your Father.”

You don’t know at what point you went from crying to blood boiling anger, but it happened.

“What the actual fuck!”, you shouted slamming the letter down on the table. “Sorry, excuse my language.”, you said towards Mae suddenly feeling bad about your outburst. She chuckled, “Don’t worry dear. I said much much worse when I read that letter.”

You continued, “Seriously? Who does something like that? And to their own child on top of it? You walked out of his life let him be. That letter was completely unnecessary. I swear I’m gonna hunt him down and kill him myself.”

Mae shook her head, “No need Y/N. After he dropped the letter off at the post office he drunkingly crashed his car into a tree. Killed him instantly. Unfortunately though, Yoongi never really recovered from this letter. He’s been very reserved and depressed ever since. He’s refused therapy or any help that I offer. I’ve tried for many years to get him to make friends or find a partner or just get out of the house and experience life. I won’t be here forever and I want him to find someone and just be happy for the rest of his time.”

While you would normally never wish harm on anyone it did bring you some joy knowing that his father was no longer around and could never hurt Yoongi again.

“Y/N, I’m sorry to drop all of this on you, but I thought you should get an explanation for what you saw earlier and why he is the way that he is. Yoongi can be kind of jumpy around loud noises and sudden movements and things like that. Please don’t run away from him. I’ve seen him smile more in the week you’ve been here than he has in months. He just sees something in you. I can tell. Call it grandmas intuition if you will. I know you’ll soon have to go back home, but I’m really hoping that maybe you’ll keep in touch with him. No pressure of course. I wouldn’t blame you for not doing it, but I just really think you could be a big positive in his life.”, she said before walking her mug over to the sink.

“Thank you for telling me all of this. I’m sure it was difficult to recount everything.”, you said almost in a whisper. She smiled before laying a hand on your shoulder, “Get some rest Y/N. I’m gonna head off to bed myself. These old bones are tired.”

As you laid in bed you could still hear the faint rumblings of thunder from miles away. You wondered what Yoongi was doing. You hoped he was peacefully sleeping in his bed, but you knew most like that wasn’t the case. It pained your heart to think about what he’d been through. No one deserved to ever have those things happen to them and you decided in that moment that you were going to try and help him. You yourself felt the connection that Mae keeps talking about and you were starting think that maybe things do happen for a reason.

The following morning when you woke up your body felt sore from the stress you experienced. Your first reaction was to go and find Yoongi, but you also knew that he was most likely going to feel embarrassed about what had happened the night before so you opted to take a seat at the desk and try to get some work done. After about an hour and only a couple paragraphs written the smell of bacon started to fill the air and the sound of your stomach grumbling in hunger followed not long after. In the kitchen you found Mae at the stove tending to the bacon. “Would you like some coffee Y/N?”, she smiled. You nodded happily taking the cup from her. Yoongi was already sitting at the table peeling some carrots and potatoes for what you assumed would become part of dinner later. You tried your best to act causally as you took a seat a chair away from him to give him some space.

Mae walked over and set a plate of eggs down in the middle of the table along with the bacon. After Yoongi cleared the vegetables that he was working on the three of you began eating your breakfast.

Mae peaked over at you and with a sly grin she began, “Y/N, thank you for bringing that strawberry pie from Taehyung’s last night. I already snuck a piece as I just couldn’t help myself.”

“Oh you’re very welcome. It did look delicious.”, you replied waiting to see where she was going with this.

“I’m going to make them a big pot of pork stew. It’ll be a good hearty meal for them while they work on the farm. I was thinking that maybe you and Yoongi could take it over to them when it’s finished.”

Now you get it. It was an easy yes for you. You really did like all of the boys from the farm and it would be a chance to spend a little time with Yoongi, but you couldn’t help but notice how red his cheeks had gotten once again and his shoulders visibly tensed. You weren’t going to force him by any means.

“Uh yeah sure that’s no problem for me. I can go alone though if Yoongi doesn’t want to go.”

“Yoongi would you be okay taking some stuff over to the farm with Y/N? For me please.”, Mae asked placing her hand on top of his.

“Okay.”, he whispered with his eyes focused on his lap.

A few hours later your little cart was packed up with a large pot of the stew and some fresh bread and jam. You and Yoongi headed off towards the farm. The first half of the walk was silent other than a few birds or rustle of leaves here or there.

“I’m sorry about last night. If I had known it was going to storm I would’ve stayed in my room to not disturb you.”, he spoke startling you out of your thoughts.

“Yoongi you don’t have to be sorry. And please don’t ever hide who you are from anyone. If they can’t handle who you are then they don’t deserve you in their life.”

He nodded in understanding pulling on his ear. A nervous habit of his. Feeling a little brave you reached for his hand to give it a light squeeze. He jumped slightly, but for a few seconds he let you hold him before removing his touch from yours. You were going to take that as a win.

Entering the strawberry farm you were quickly greeted by Jin and Namjoon. “Hi Y/N, didn’t expect to see you back so soon.”, Jin smiled.

“Mae wanted us to bring over some stew and bread as a thank you for the pie.”, you responded handing over the items from the cart. Jungkook appears out of nowhere excitedly grabbing the bread and jam from you.

“Jeeze I haven’t seen this kid all day, but as soon as food is involved he magically appears.”, Jin rolled his eyes. Taehyung came walking over after noticing your arrival. He wrapped you in a big hug and began making small talk. You could feel Yoongi’s presence behind you. He was almost using your body to shield himself away from everyone.

Taehyung gestured for you to follow him, “Y/N and Yoongi come on into the bakery. We’ve got a new strawberry milk latte we just put on the menu and I want your opinion. Personally I think it’s wayyyy too sweet, but Jin thinks it could be award winning.”

Jin scoffed, “You don’t even like coffee so your opinion means nothing.”

“I think it’s amazing.”, Jungkook added.

“You’d drink lake water and say it was good if we put a flavored milk in it.”, Namjoon quipped.

Chuckling at the argument going on infront of you it took about twelve steps before you realized your shadow was not behind you. When you turned you saw Yoongi was already walking back towards the path to the inn. Namjoon came up behind you and gave you a nudge in Yoongi’s direction and you knew what he meant. Jogging up next to him you reached for his arm, but opted not to as you’d quickly learned touch is not his first choice.

“Hey where are you going? Come hang out with us at the bakery.”, you said once you caught up to him.

He simply shook his head and kept walking.

“They’re really nice guys. They were asking about you yesterday. I think you’d really like them if you gave them a chance.”

Still he continued walking in silence. Without thinking you reached out to grab his arm just in an attempt to stop him, but he flinched.

“No. I just want to be left alone. Please.”, he whimpered near tears.

Instantly you backed off with your hands in the air to give him space and show that you weren’t going to touch him.

“I’m sorry Yoongi. I won’t force you to hang out with them. I just wanted you to get to know them a little. I think it would be good for you.”

He ignored you and began walking back home again. You sent Taehyung a quick text apologizing for your sudden departure and letting him know you’d stop by on a different day to try the latte before you left. Yoongi walked surprisingly fast so you had to go back into a light jog to catch up. You decided to hang back a little and not walk right next to him so you weren’t suffocating him. You pretended not to notice him peeking back to look at you every once in a while.

As you walked you noticed a few cherry blossom trees just over a hill. You’d completely forgot about the trees and made yourself a mental note to go see them before you left Holly Falls. When you finally made it back to the inn Yoongi was waiting for you at the front door.

“You didn’t have to walk back with me. I’m an adult and I could walk back myself.”, he said with a pout.

“I know. I just wanted to come back with you.”

“But what about hanging out with them?”

You shrugged your shoulders, “I’ll go back another time. I’d rather hang out with you anyways.” His face instantly turned a deep shade of red.

“So tell me, what does Yoongi like to do in his spare time?”, you questioned.

“I’d rather just be alone to be honest.”

You wanted to push him harder, but you were concerned with what the outcome might be so instead you gave him a smile and watched as be walked inside letting the door close behind him. Dropping down to take a seat on the steps you let out a long sigh. This was going to be more difficult than you had imagined and to make matters worse you were only supposed to stay for another week.

“Excuse me miss, are there any rooms available?”, someone spoke making you to jump. Since your head was hanging you hadn’t noticed the young man walk up to the front door of the inn. You took in his appearance and noticed how exceptionally handsome he was.

“I just came from the main part of the town and there are no rooms available so it was suggested that I come over here.”, he continued.

“Oh um well I think there might be a couple rooms left, but I’m just a guest as well. If you head inside the check in desk is in the corner and they can help you out.”

The handsome man held out his hand for you, “Sorry I didn’t mean to assume anything. My name is Jimin by the way.”

You smiled graciously accepting his hand, “Y/N and no worries. Hopefully you can get a room. It would be nice to have another person around here to talk to and stuff.”

He chuckled, “Well I guess I better get in there then and see about a room.”

You gently leaned to the side to give home more space to get by before you returned back to wondering how you could get Yoongi to open up to you a little more without making him too uncomfortable.

After he had walked inside Yoongi took a deep breath and after a quick heated discussion with himself going over all the pros and cons he decided that giving you twenty minutes of his time to talk would be good for him and maybe over time he could work up the courage to actually spend time with you, maybe even like a date before you left. The thought of that made his head spin. Just as he was about to open the door to find you he heard your conversation with Jimin and how you said you were glad there was going to be someone else at the inn. He felt his heart crack at that. In Yoongi’s brain you were already done with him just like everyone else in his life, except his grandmother of course. He always managed to chase everyone away. He quickly accepted that he was a lost cause so he scurried off to be alone in his room before you or the new guest could see him. Once in his room he heard you introduce Jimin to Mae. Your voice sounded excited as you showed Jimin to his room just down the hall from yours.

Yoongi sat on his bed squeezing his favorite stuffed animal, a blue koala bear named Koya, a gift from his mother just before she had passed.

He heard you let out a loud laugh at something funny Jimin had said and he curled up on his bed feeling the tears start to fall.

He hated that he was like this. He wanted to be what he would consider normal, but there was this little part of his brain that always reminds him of what he’s been through and how many times he been told how unwanted and unloved he is. Even if he did manage to speak to you he’d never want to burden you with having someone like him in your life. He needs a lot of mental care and you don’t deserve to have someone that week. So he chose to lie in his bed squeezing his Koya a little closer every time he heard you laugh in the hallway wishing it was him that was making react like that instead. Your laugh was just as pretty as you are he thought. With each passing minute he could feel the panic setting in more and more and he eventually used the koala bear to muffle the sobs leaving his body not wanting to disturb you any further.

[spectorbear]

— strangers (soulmates) part 1

pairing: erwin smith x f!reader

summary: erwin smith was the embodiment of intimation, money, and power. and you were his personal assistant.

genre: office au; slow burn, smut, angst

word count: 2.1k

warnings/notes: swearing, no real warnings for this part; purely self-indulgent bc i just watched aot for the first time and i love him so bad

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masterlist 

YOU EASILY SLIPPED THROUGH THE CITY STREETS, despite the pile of things you carried. Two coffees, a binder of paperwork, a folder for a new proposal, your laptop, and a wrapped pastry. It was your routine at this point, and you grew accustomed to having an insane amount of things to rush around with.

It has been just over a year since you became Erwin Smith’s assistant. You were an intern with the company the year before, and you were extremely excited when they asked if you would be interested in the assistant job. Erwin had never needed an assistant before. It boosted your ego a bit, if you were completely honest, so you did your best to be needed.

You shifted through the people, finally making it to the business building. You sent the front-desk attendants a smile as you scanned your ID to head up the elevators. Erwin shouldn’t be in for at least another fifteen minutes, you were making good time.

Hange Zoe’s assistant held the door open for you, greeting you with a similar stack of paperwork and coffees in his hands.

“Good morning, Moblit.” You greeted, thanking him for holding the elevator. Moblit Berner had been there longer than you have, assisting one of the other higher ups you considered a friend. “I thought I saw Hange’s car here already?”

“We haven’t left.” He confessed, clicking the 11th floor. “They sent me on a coffee run, then ended up printing a bunch of paperwork downstairs, and then sent me for some research products. I don’t think either of us has slept.”

You felt bad for him, and you would’ve given him a reassuring gesture if your hands weren’t full. “It’ll pass soon, they’ve finally confirmed the deal with Yeager.”

Moblit motioned to the pile you held. “Mr. Smith seems to keep you busy too.”

“As always. What are we assistants for?” You half-joked. He chuckled.

The elevator dinged as you made it to your shared floor. He started to the right, giving you a quick smile as he departed. You smiled back, heading towards the left.

Erwin’s office was larger than the others, in the corner of the building and surrounded by floor-length windows. You had a desk just outside of it, fully decorated and meticulously organized.

You plopped into your chair, setting everything down quickly. The binder was an assignment due today, and the folder was given to you last night for you to create notes; both were completed and ready for your boss.

You started your morning routine of checking your email and confirming the schedule for the day. As you replied to someone about meeting times, you felt Erwin come in.

There was always a shift in the air when he arrived. He had a commanding presence, sucking all of the air from your lungs like a vacuum. You had worked with him for over a year and you were still greatly intimated, anxious, and small under his gaze. You didn’t think he knew just how terrifying he truly was, oblivious to the effect he had on everyone. Or maybe he did and used it to his advantage.

He always looked incredible, with a tailored suit and clean shave. You would be lying if you said that he wasn’t attractive. But in the morning light, he always looked the best.

“Good morning.” You greeted when he reached your desk. You handed him his coffee, the paperwork, and his daily schedule. “Everything should be ready for the Yeager deal. Please let me know if you need any changes.”

“I do.” He said, voice deep and warm. He hasn’t even spared you a glance. “An old friend of mine is visiting today. Could you reschedule my lunch meeting and make a reservation for me?”

“Absolutely, Sir.” You agreed instantly. “Is there anywhere specific you’d like to go with this friend?”

“Somewhere clean will do.” He flipped open the binder with one hand. “I will keep you updated on these notes.”

You felt yourself let out a breath the second he entered his office. You hadn’t realized you were holding it.

You made a few calls. The lunch meeting was supposed to be with other people in the building, so you were lucky enough to have an easy conversation with each. You reserved a spot at a nicer restaurant in the city that was known to be clean and well-reviewed. You sent Erwin a new version of his schedule via email and he instantly approved it.

When you first started this job, you had no idea that you would be here long. It was your first job out of graduation, and you only planned for the internship to get you to a bigger and better administrative or business-related job. Yet, here you were. Because you were good at this job and rather enjoyed it, and not just because it was a job.

Hange Zoe, followed closely by Moblit, plopped down at a chair right in front of your desk without so much as an introduction. Moblit stayed standing, looking exhausted and clear-minded all at once.

“The schedule update!” Hange exclaimed, as if you knew what they were talking about.

You raised an eyebrow. If they wanted to argue with you about moving their lunch with Erwin, they wouldn’t be so chipper. You were confused.

“Mr. Smith’s?” You offered. You only made scheduling for you and your boss; Hange’s had nothing to do with you.

“He’s having lunch today with an old friend of ours.” Hange explained, finally; they were nearly jumping out of their skin. “You should totally ask him to invite me!”

You would never do that. You were not one to talk to Erwin outside of what he asked of you or if he talked to you directly. In your two years with the company, you don’t think you have ever asked him something out of turn. Let alone invite someone to a lunch that he is hosting and that you already reserved.

“Hange, I don’t…” You started, but they were already cutting you off.

“Please! I’m sure they’d love to have me with them!” They pleaded, though you could feel an aura of anger behind their tone. Then they paused. “Wait, why wasn’t I invited in the first place? This is ridiculous! Is Erwin currently in a meeting?”

“No, but he is preparing for one in about half an hour.” You told them. “How do you even know who he’s going to lunch with? I only wrote lunch with friend on the schedule?”

“Because Erwin does not have many friends.” Hange sent you a wink and jumped from your desk to knock on the office door. Erwin let them in with a quiet, “Come in”.

You exchanged a look with Moblit.

“Their birthday is coming up.” Moblit said, changing the topic, sighing as he took a seat where Hange just was. “And I’m thinking about getting them melatonin.”

You chuckled, looking towards the door. You couldn’t hear a thing that they were saying. “Don’t you think it would’ve been fun to know them in college?”

You and Moblit were the youngest ones at the company, close in age though he was a little older than you. It was nice to have someone your age and at your same position to talk to.

He smiled. “I don’t think I can imagine them in a classroom, or at a bar, or at a sports game. I think they’ll always be in business suits in my brain.”

Before you could reply, they both exited the office. Hange was still talking, saying something about how they were the one who introduced them and how it is stupid, but Erwin was just gently guiding her out of his office.

“I have already told you that we can meet together after work.” Erwin replied, seemingly unaffected by Hange’s antics. “This lunch is just between us, you must understand.”

“There’s been radio silence for years. And I deserve to talk to him too.” They said, standing directly in front of your boss. There was no fear, no hesitation.

“I understand. And as I’ve said, we can meet together after work.” He almost reassured her. You had never heard him use that tone before, it was almost soft. Almost. “However, Levi has asked to speak to me alone for lunch. If it makes you feel better, I will report everything back to you.”

You had never seen them like this. Friendly, casual, and talking openly. You had never really considered your boss anything other than that: your boss. You never considered him to be a friend or have friends, or have a social life outside of work. It seemed to be the only thing he did; he was always working weekends, holidays, and you even got a call in the middle of the night from the office before. The way he spoke to Hange, with ease and friendship, was strange to you.

This lunch seemed to be important. You had never heard of this “Levi” before.

“Sir?” You asked, mainly because the tension in the room could be cut with a knife. “Is everything alright?”

He seemed to register where he was and who he was around. He looked at you and Moblit, nodding a bit as a greeting as if you were not there the whole time. He was typically very observant; this friend they were discussing must be very distracting.

“I apologize.” Erwin told you. He straightened his back. “Everything is just fine, thank you for your concern.” He turned to Hange again. “I will talk to you after lunch.”

And he was back in his office.

———

IT WAS LATE. The sun was low on the horizon, letting in spears of orange light into the office. Everyone else had gone home for the night, yet you still had plenty of work to do. You wanted to get as much as you could done before you got home, never wanting to take work home with you.

You were typing away on your keyboard when the elevator dinged, indicating someone was getting off on your floor. It must be the janitor, you thought, and continued to work.

“You are still here?” Erwin’s voice interrupted you.

You nearly jumped from your chair. His interruption made your skin hot, a strike of electricity shot through your spine. You looked up at him.

He was no longer in his suit; instead, he was in casual jeans and a button-down blue shirt that matched his eyes. The oranges and reds from outside reflected off of him in a way that made him look like a photograph. His hair was still perfectly styled, and he still stood as if the world was at his command. And it was.

“I just wanted to get some final work done before the weekend.” You confessed, swiveling in your chair to face him. “What are you doing here?”

Erwin stood there for a moment, blinking down at you with a furrowed brow. Considering. Thinking. You felt tiny under his gaze. He wasn’t going to answer your question, so you assumed he was grabbing something he left.

“Did I give you too much work?” He finally asked.

You took a breath, trying to get oxygen into your empty lungs. “No, no.”

He paused again.

“Finish on Monday, then, and go home.” He said. “It’s late on a Friday night. I am sure you’d prefer to go out with your college friends.”

You nearly laughed in his face. “That’s what Saturdays are for.”

This was the most you two have talked outside of work-talk. You kind of liked it.

Erwin almost smiled. The edges of his lips quirked up only a little, but not enough.

“I suppose you’re right.” He started to pass your desk, placing a hand on the back of your chair. You stilled, looking at him. “But go home soon. If there is ever that much work for you to do again, please inform me.”

The electricity went down your spine again. A jolt of something unfamiliar, loud, and present, that made you almost gasp out loud.

You nodded.

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