#But oh my god I needed to see them married with childre

[hailqiqi]

I finally finished the books and

how dare

[dontworrysunflower]

Be My Valentine | Shawn Mendes

𝗪𝗮𝗿𝗻𝗶𝗻𝗴𝘀: just really cute shit

Just cuz he said he didn’t have a valentine (I volunteer as tribute), I had to write this

Masterlist in my bio

•••

He admires from afar, her tight black leather skirt accentuating her curves. The dip in her blouse leaves little to the imagination. God does he want her, not just in the sexual way. He wants all of her to be his.

He was leaving for tour in a few weeks, and he want to spend as much time he can with his friends and family before leaving.

He’s at a local bar with his friend group, Geoff and Brian already drunk off their asses, flirting with any girl around. Shawn watches (y/n) play a match of pool with Zubin and Matt. He watches her bend forward and hit the balls, getting two in at once.

“When are you gonna make a move?” Teddy asks behind him, startling the poor boy.

He clears his throat “I don’t know what you’re talking about” he says hesitantly, his eyes still on (y/n).

“Oh c’mon, Shawn. It’s so obvious you’re in love with (y/n). Just go talk to her, I’m sure she feels the same way” Teddy encourages, sipping at her alcoholic drink.

Shawn scoffs and turns to Teddy “And what makes you so sure?”

“It’s so obvious she likes you. Plus, she told me herself” Teddy smirks

Shawn’s eyes widen “Really? She did?” When?”

“I went to her house with Emily awhile ago, she got drunk off wine and just spilled it out”

He laughs, (y/n) was a lightweight. He knew it, he knew everything about her. He contemplates on asking her out.

“You know what you should do? Ask her out for Valentine’s Day! That would be so romantic” Teddy cheers

“I don’t know Teddy..” he doubts as he watches (y/n) walk around the pool table, losing his sight of her beautiful legs.

“I know what you can do, she came with me. I’ll say I had an emergency and had to leave early, you can take her home and ask her out for Thursday. Then on the date you’ll confess your love to each other, get married, have childr-”

“Slow down there Teddy. Maybe we could do that. You’d really help me?”

“Uh duh! Y’all are meant for each other”

•••

“Oh no, Emily hurt herself, I have to go and check if she’s okay” Teddy exclaims, the horrible acting very evident, but (y/n) doesn’t notice. Teddy starts to get up from her seat, but (y/n) pulls at her arm.

“But you’re my ride..”

“Have Shawn take you or something” Teddy says before walking out behind (y/n), Teddy turns around and winks at Shawn and a thumbs up.

“Yeah I can take you home when you’re ready” Shawn says calmly before taking a sip of his drink, but really, he’s freaking out inside.

This is really happening.

•••

It’s been a couple of hours, his adrenaline only low because of the drinks he’s had. He watches people’s feet move across the dance floor to some trap song when he feels a tap on his shoulder. He turns around and looks down at the his favorite girl.

“Um, I’m ready to go home” she says shyly, playing with the hem of her shirt, biting down on her lip. He gulps.

“Yeah sure lets go” He puts his drink down and leads her out the bar, his large hand on the small of her back.

He opens the passenger side door for her and held her hand to help her into his Jeep. He didn’t close the door until she was buckled in and then walked around the car to the drivers side, and turning on the engine. He buckled in and then slid his phone out his pocket, connected it to a cord and handed it to her “Pick any song you want, you know my password” he says before reversing out his spot and driving to her apartment complex.

•••

“You didn’t have to walk me up to my apartment” she says, her feet dragging on the carpet of the hallway floor.

“What kind of gentleman would I be if I didn’t walk a girl to her door?” He exclaimed, his hands shoved in the pocket of his jeans.

She giggles, and he smiles because it’s his favorite sound in the world. He watches her take out her keys from her purse and slide them into the hole. “Thank you for taking me home” she looks up at him, smiling tiredly.

“No problem”

Okay, this is it

“Uh, I’ll see you soon?” She asks, as she starts to step in her apartment.

“Um, actually I wanted to ask you if you were busy this Thursday?”

She furrows her eyebrows “That’s Valentine’s Day..”

He nods slowly, eyeing her, hoping she gets what he’s getting at. He bounces from the heels of his feet to his toes.

“Oh! Like a date” she realizes, turning bright red. “I’d, I’d love to go on a date with you Shawn” she smiles sweetly, biting down on her lower lip.

“Cool” cool? Really? “I’ll see you then” he leans in to hug her, and he cheerishes this moment, taking in the scent of her hair and perfume.

“I’ll see you” she says looking into his hazel orbs, and without even realizing it, she goes on her toes to kiss his reddened cheek.

He nods, mezmorized by her and the feeling of her lips on his skin. She steps back into her apartment and closes the door. He starts to walk back down to his Jeep when he fistbumps the air and yelps in excitement.

Now he’s gotta plan a date in 48 hours.

•••

🅣🅗🅤🅡🅢🅓🅐🅨

He looks at himself on his rear view mirror, fixing his hair to one side. He grabs the flowers and box of chocolate off the passenger seat and gets out.

As he walks up the stairs to her floor, he contemplates on the date. Is everything set? Will she like it? Then he finds himself at her door, knocking lightly.

“Coming” he hears her muffled voice from the other side of the door, then hears the knob jiggle and lock clicking. The door swings open to reveal (y/n) in a white cami dress with red roses-matching the flowers in his hand- a pair of strapy beige heels on her feet, a denim jacket around her arms. Her makeup is natural, almost like she’s not wearing any and her natural hair down in waves.

He forgets how to breath “Oh, hi” he smiles nervously and he runs a hand in his just styled hair, messing up his style.

“Do I look bad?”

“God no! Far from it actually. You looks so beautiful (y/n), like always”

She looks down, and blushes. “Are those for me?” She says, gesturing to the roses and chocolates in his hands.

“Uh, yes. Happy Valentine’s Day (y/n). Be my valentine?”

She nods as she giggles taking the gifts, “You can come inside real quick while I put these in water.” She moves away from the door to let him in and he closes the door behind him before follong her to her kitchen. He looks around her apartment, a lot of photos of their friend group, some of just the two of you. He then looks at her, reaching for a vase high up in her cabinets. He watches her dress rise up a little around her thighs, as she tries to reach for a vase on her tip toes. He then realizes she needs help.

“Oh! Here, let me help you” he walks behind her, subconsciously placing a large hand on her side to steady himself to reach a vase, he hears her take in a deep breath.

“Thank you” she says before walking to the sink, filling the vase half way with water and putting the flowers in. She rearranged them before placing the vase on her dining table “Ready?” She asks, turning around. She grabs her purse by the door, and opens it.

•••

“Will you please tell me where we’re going?” She pleads, holding his hand with both of hers as they drive down a road.

“Nope. It wouldn’t be a surprise if I told you” he brings their hand to his lips and kisses her hands repeatedly.

“Oh c’mon! Please? At least just a hint?”

He sighs, letting go of her hand to only make a turn, and he returns his hand in hers “Fine, uh, scenery”

She scoffs “That doesn’t tell me anything”

“Exactly baby”

•••

“This is our date?” She asks, her hand enveloped by his.

The pick nick blanket is held down my his guitar case and a basket. The sun is starting to set.

“Do you not like it?” He starts to worry

“No, no! I love it. It’s so cute and romantic” she pulls him down on the blanket, and opens the basket to find a bunch of her favorite foods. “I can’t believe you’d do all of this for me”

“(Y/n), I want you to know that I really really like. As more than a friend”

“I really like you too,”

“I feel a ‘but’ coming”

“but you’re leaving soon. I don’t wanna start a relationship that’s a thousand miles apart when maybe later, I could have you not even a mile away,” she says, rubbing her thumb over his swallow bird tattoo.

That’s understandable. Having a relationship with his lifestyle is nearly impossible. He doesn’t blame her for having doubts.

“But I’d rather have some type of romantic relationship with you, then to not have one at all.” She says, looking out into the sunset, her hair flying behind her in the breeze.

“So, will you be my valentine, for life?”

She laughs so hard she has to clutch her stomach. “That’s so cheesy, but yes”

He places a hand on her cheek, moving her head up. He leans in slowly, his hot breath fanning over her plump, glossy lips. She shortens the distance and crashes her lips on his. Their lips move in sync against each other, the fruity taste of her lipgloss transferring to his mouth. She starts to lean back on the blanket, their lips never an inch away from each other. He moves to be comfortable above her, his hand slipping in her hair, she lets out a quiet moan. She pulls away reluctantly, he chases her lips, stealing a peck before helping her back up. “So you’re my girlfriend now?” He asks, smiling from ear to ear.

She giggles “And you’re my boyfriend”

Okay I don’t really like the ending but idk. Let me know what you think and reblog! Lets enjoy our lonely fantasy of Shawn as our valentine!

[yukiwrites]

Mixed Feelings

Thank you so much for commissioning me again, @breeachuu! I hope you like it! ;D

Summary: Through her countless years, Nidra watched marriages begin and end... Chrom and Robin’s ceremony struck her heart as deeply as one she had witnessed as a child, and now the manakete wonders if she’ll ever find a love for herself...

Commission info HERE and HERE!

The war against Plegia took precious people from Nidra. Their bonds had barely just begun forming and were abruptly cut.

And yet, all that time she spent with the Shepherds gave her back in equal measure. She felt truly at home amongst that ragtag group of humans and shapeshifters, as much as she felt only once during her long, long years.

The friends she had made back when she was young, the bond she watched grow and bear fruit... It so very much resembled the one Chrom and Robin shared.

This time, however, the manakete was older, wiser and had a more active role in the ceremony. She had been personally invited to attend as a friend of Ylisse and its new rulers, her heart a mix of emotions she never truly felt before.

Happiness. Grief. Melancholy.

Her human friends taught her how to deal with all the different kinds of emotions -- they were a very emotional kind, after all. And Nidra had much to learn, and a great amount of time to put it to practice.

She watched her precious friends confirm their love in front of the whole kingdom; the kiss they shared under flushed cheeks and uncertain hands... It would be etched into Nidra's heart for the eternity to come.

Her eyes burned with tears, the overflowing joy radiating around her from every side.

And yet, her heart also felt heavy.

She looked down to her chest, clutching it with one hand, blinking so as to shoo away the tears.

Nidra was used to that feeling: loneliness.

Fleeting as the human life span was, she knew that it would be only a matter of time until she said good-bye to her precious, precious friends. She wanted to treasure that moment fully, to give them her best regards with everything she had; but how could she, when the memories of thousands of years of solitude hanged over her shoulders?

Tears streamed down her face as she hugged the bride during the party, congratulating her friend from the bottom of her heart. "Truly treasure this moment, Robin. Live your life to its fullest and do not regret loving and being loved." She squeezed the hands of the now Queen, receiving a warm hug in response.

"Thank you so much, Nidra. For everything."

Nidra bit her lower lip, once again being washed over by loneliness. She needed some time to think, but it wouldn't be appropriate to leave during the ceremony, and frankly, telling Robin about it would do no good, either.

After the day was over and the happy couple retired to their quarters, Nidra transformed and left.

Flying always made wonders to clear her mind -- the sky was the only thing that remained the same no matter how many ages passed. It brought her comfort and much-needed companionship.

She simply closed her eyes and flew, enjoying the cold night’s breeze flow through her scales, followed by the blinding sunlight guiding her wings.

Nidra flew as high and as far as she could go, taking all the new sensations in.

Chrom and Robin. Frederick and Lissa. All of them shared different stories that intertwined into love; into the creation of new family bonds.

Nidra watched these stories unfold and couldn't be happier for her dear friends.

"Oh... I understand now." She spoke for the first time in three days, finally reaching an answer to her silent questions. "It is as I thought, and yet not... How complex the heart is!" She smiled bitterly, as much as she could in her dragon form, and took an U-turn back to Ylisse.

She had found her answer.

It took her another three days to fly back, her thoughts clear but her heart clouded. Robin welcomed her on the evening of the sixth day of her absence, holding both of her hands. "Nidra! Where have you been? I was about to mobilize the Shepherds to look for you outside Ylisse..."

From the balcony she had landed onto as she transformed back to her human form, Nidra rubbed her thumb over Robin's hand.

The manakete then looked up to the darkening sky, the first star shyly shining over the dark orange.

"It is a lonely one, this endless life of mine." She said with a bittersweet smile, leaning on the balcony. Robin followed, her eyebrows flickering with emotion. "It is alright, Robin, do not feel responsible for following your own path towards happiness."

Surprised but not fazed by her friend's perceptive skills, Robin looked down, pressing her lips into a thin line. "I... can lend you an ear, if you want to talk more about it. I can't say I even begin to understand how it is to be almost immortal, so..."

Nidra looked up at the sky, breathing in deeply. "Your marriage reminded me of another joyful occasion I have been part of, so many ages ago." She smiled softly, the rose-colored memory a fond one inside her heart. "The Prince and Princess had fought for opposing kingdoms despite having loved each other from childhood... And still managed to hold such memorable and loving ceremony. Theirs was a love as pure as the one you share with Chrom."

The mention of her husband made Robin smile and follow Nidra's gaze to the sky -- it was now of dark blue, splattered with the stars’ lights. "I'm... glad you see us that way. I just wish to build a happy and peaceful future with him from now on."

"So did they. Yours is a rightful path." Nidra replied, her smile slowly disappearing. "And yet, still alone I remain."

"Oh!" Robin gasped, not knowing how to react. "Um, I, uh..." She looked around, then remembered the question Miriel had asked Nidra so many months ago. "What are the manakete's mating-"

"Hah! Robin!" Nidra snorted, shooing the depressing mood away. "It was hard enough to shake Miriel away from me with these questions, et tu, now?"

The Queen laughed, "haha, sorry. But I'm half-serious, you see." She lifted her finger, as though she were a teacher giving out advice to her student. "I can help you find a good husband! I don't know many male manaketes, uh, I actually don't know any, but I know plenty of humans!"

Nidra never lost her smile. "So you want to play matchmaker?"

"Um, I'm sure we can find you some good-"

"I shall humour you, friend. What did you have in mind?" The manakete chuckled.

"Really?" The Queen beamed, quickly taking her friend's hand. "Let's go to my study so we can sit and talk this over!"

Nidra let herself be led, the warm feeling finally taking over her chest.

She didn't feel the creeping loneliness that had always made itself present whenever she was enjoying a joyful moment.

No matter how happy she had been, it would always linger at the back of her heart, ever reminding her of her ultimate fate.

And yet, it was nowhere to be found now.

Not for the prospect of finding a husband, no. But for simply enjoying a little girl's time with a close friend who wanted nothing more than what was best for her.

In truth, ROBIN was the one humoring Nidra.

"Okay, so, from the Shepherds? We got Frederick- no wait..." Robin started, sitting down by a table at her study, inviting Nidra to sit beside her.

The manakete complied. "Indeed. Surely he will ask Lissa in the upcoming weeks? I tire of waiting for them to move in accordance to their hearts."

"Hah, yeah. Maybe we can get the ball rolling? I keep telling him to just GO, but he won't listen."

"Surely we should." Nidra nodded solemnly.

"Okay, so Frederick is out... What about Gaius? He's not the most righteous one, but he'll at least care for you- oh, wait."

Once again did Nidra snort. "He married Tharja not too long after we returned from Plegia."

Robin face-palmed, remembering how Tharja asked her to be the best-lady if they ever had a proper ceremony. "Alright, then. Gregor? He's wise and, uh, closer to you in age than anyone here."

"..." Nidra waited for the clicking moment, the corners of her lips already curving up.

"Oh, wait." Robin sighed. "Panne."

"Indeed." Nidra snorted. "Surely she can build her race back with him."

"This isn't going well, is it?" The Queen sighed. "What about Libra? I'm sure he'd treasure you- oh."

Nidra bobbed her head to the sides. "Even if he hadn't married Maribelle, I do not think I'd feel comfortable with him. He offered me a prayer in more than one occasion, see."

"Pfft. Did he ask you to deliver it to Naga?" Robin tried not to laugh, leaning her back on the chair.

"Actually, yes."

"No way! Oh, gods, I was just joking!"

"He was quite serious, so I did send it to Her. She rarely replies, however, so he was simply content with my intention."

"I see. Well, Vaike is also out, despite being single. Sorry, Vaike." Robin snorted, then sighed. "This isn't going well at all! I'm going to have to check the rank-and-file soldiers now. I'm not stopping until we can find you a suitable husband-"

"Posh, Robin. It is fine." Nidra chuckled, holding her friend's hand so she couldn't get up and check the soldiers' documents. "Simply spending time with you and the others is enough for now. Forgive me for troubling you, but thank you for caring so much about me."

Robin's shoulders sagged. "Aw, it's no trouble at all! I'm sure I can find you a good man." I did matchmake a WYVERN, and that was a beast. Nidra at least has a human form! "But if you'd rather talk, I'll always lend you an ear."

"Thank you, dear friend. I did so enjoy our conversation just now, so why not continue it with another purpose in mind?"

Robin tilted her head to the side. "What purpose?"

"How do you think their children will look like? And yours as well, for that matter?" Nidra smirked, the smile growing as Robin's face reddened.

"I- childr- mine? N-Nidra!"

"Haha! It is part of life, friend! Come now, let me hear your thoughts on the matter..."

[youremyonlyhope]

Children of Earth: Day Four

AKA Wow, things get even worse. You don’t think it’s possible, but here we are.

OR: This episode is so relevant to this week that it was physically painful to watch and I’m even more mad at Trump than ever before.

I’m not ready for this.

Been super busy the last 2 weeks, gonna watch this episode now. Who knows when I’ll get to Day 5. Maybe over the weekend if I’m lucky. Doubt it.

See, I know how intense Day Three is since I literally just watched it a few weeks ago, but somehow I blocked it out over the last 2 weeks. And the “Previously...” reminded me. Oh god. THIS IS WHY I REFUSED TO REWATCH THIS SEASON. Why is this episode an hour long why do you need to add MORE time to my pain? Oh... Gareth’s name on the opening credits for the last time... I’m sad. “In 1913 the Spanish flu killed something like 5% of the human race.” “I know, I was there.” Ok, taking a second to pull focus from this horrible thing they’re doing to say how much I love Jack’s little “LOL I remember that” “But that was 100s of years ago” “Haha, yeah...” moments throughout Torchwood. They’re my favorite things. Also, I had forgotten that they gave them the 10 kids in return for a cure to save 25 million people... I mean... it’s still horrible... but for all these years I hadn’t remember any type of justification. For some reason I was thinking they were just doing it because the aliens asked and they didn’t want angry aliens coming at them, not that it was because of an actual deal made. It doesn’t make it... that much better... but it’s not as bad? I guess? I don’t know. I guess I’m relieved I remembered it wrong. Also hi Sophie! I remember when Benedict married her I was like “I know her... I KNOW I know her...” and sure enough, Torchwood. Britain has 5 actors, and they’ve all been in the Whoniverse. “Just 12? Sounds like a good deal.” Oh Jack... oh Jack oh Jack oh Jack... I mean he’s in such a tough situation, but also I wonder if his immortality skews his judgement. Not even wonder since we know it does sometimes. More like I wonder if this is one of those times. “They say they’ll live forever” Ohhhhh god they kept their promise. Oh god. “Actually, we need someone who doesn’t care.” OOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHH. SEE. IMMORTALITY. SKEWING JUDGEMENT. THEY KNOW. THEY TAKE ADVANTAGE OF IT. JACK. GROUND YOURSELF MORE.

Ugh. My episode’s frozen after Gwen says “You just handed them over and hoped for the best?” but if I go 1 second ahead of that it’s fine. What is wrong with this 1 second that keeps freezes?

I wonder if there was something that drew the kids in? Because even though Jack is super charismatic, and kids are super obedient and trusting, they wouldn’t just walk into a bright light because a guy told them to... or at least I hope they wouldn’t... Well at least Jack’s super mad about it. I mean, they shouldn’t have even attempted to stop Clem from shooting. That’s the good thing about Jack, you can keep shooting him and killing him over and over again until you get all your anger out, and there are no consequences.  Especially since Jack already hates himself enough to agree with you for whatever reason you’re shooting him. Wow I hate Torchwood. “Can’t believe you didn’t mention this before.” Ianto, all of your scenes last episode had me going “WHY ARE YOU TWO ONLY JUST TALKING ABOUT THIS STUFF.” so there’s sooooooooo much you don’t know. I can’t tell if Johnson asking about Steven not knowing who Jack really is is her genuinely being interested in the situation, or if she’s mocking them. It could go either way. Part of me feels like I remember her being redeemed, I hope I’m right because I REALLY want to like Johnson. Wait why did the computer sound like it was combined with Bridget’s voice? Does it assume she’s a woman so it adds a woman’s voice over the computer voice? Or were the editors just lazy and altered Bridget’s actress’ lines instead of rerecording them with a computer voice? Oh deep breaths. I can’t handle this. JUST THE STUPID SMOKEY BOX MAKES ME ANXIOUS. I love that Frobisher mentioned the Prime Minister. I know it’s not him outrightly telling everyone that the Prime Minister’s a part of it, but still it’s more recognition than the PM wanted so I’m glad Frobisher brought him up, even in that way. And only mentioned him. He could have said “The Prime Minister, an American General, and a UNIT Colonel are watching.” but no, he said “The Prime Minister of this country is watching.” Yes. I love it. Who is this brave soul walking into the box though? What’s his story? I love Lois getting closer and Bridget giving her a “What is this girl doing?” look. Oh god the child. And the Prime Minister’s like “Oops I’ve been caught” AND I’M LIKE STOP BEING SO SELFISH YOU IDIOT THERE’S A CHILD IN THERE AND YOU’RE CARING THAT IT’S PROOF AGAINST YOU. WHAT ABOUT THE CHILD WHO’S STILL A CHILD 44 YEARS LATER AND HOOKED UP TO STUFF? DON’T YOU WANNA KNOW IF HE’S OK? Oh I don’t think I noticed Ianto’s tears before... baby no... “Do you think he knows? Is he conscious?” Wow Rhys asking a good question. Is it better if he’s not in pain? Oh Lois no don’t cry no this hurts. I FORGOT ABOUT THE 456 JUST BEING LIKE “LOL BUT I THOUGHT YOU GUYS WANTED THIS OFF THE RECORD LOL WELL YOU SHOULDN’T HAVE COME IN LOL” THAT’S BOTH HILARIOUS AND HORRIFYING. “What does it want them for?” “Bit late to ask now.” OOOOh Rhys I love you. Asking good questions, calling out Jack. Love love love the American General. Right now. I think I remember ending up hating everyone in that room debating which kids to take. But right now, love him. And the Prime Minister’s an idiot. But we knew this already. Old news.

OH MY GOD. Oh my god. Watching this season in the midst of the outrage over Trump’s family separation policy... just... it all suddenly hit me really hard. Wow.

“I’ve only just scraped the surface, haven’t I?” Unfortunately, yes.

Jack: I’ve gotta go, I won’t be long. Me: Here we go again. Running away. Ianto: You’re doing it again. Me: GOOD. CALL HIM OUT.

Yes, Jack, it’s ok to call Frobisher. It’s smart to do it far away so it can’t be tracked. Just TELL them you’re going to do it. Once again, even just shouting it as you run off is better than nothing. Wow ok now Jack’s spilling everything. I do love that coat though. Jack’s iconic coat. I know I just ruined an emotional scene, but since losing the original coat I REALLY appreciate the new one, ok? It’s his thing. That picture they pulled up of Jack is from They Keep Killing Suzie when they all arrive all dramatic and we are introduced to my queen, Detective Swanson. Did they just pick that episode for everyone’s pictures? Owen’s official picture’s from that scene too. Also, still super disappointed we never got more Detective Swanson. She was the BEST. Love her. HEY, PRIME MINISTER, FROBISHER NEEDS A NAP. PRIME MINISTER. STOP BRINGING FROBISHER INTO THIS. DEAL WITH STUFF FOR YOURSELF FOR ONCE. STOP SAVING YOURSELF. THINK OF THE ENTIRE POPULATION OF THE WORLD. OR AT THE VERY VERY LEAST THINK OF FROBISHER. “Unaccompanied asylum seekers awaiting deportation.” Guys. Guys. This is getting too real. This was too real in 2009 when it aired. This was too real in 2013 when I watched it for the first time. And this is WAY TOO REAL IN 2018. “Orphans in ‘65, asylum seekers today. There’s progress for you.” Uugggghghhhhhhh “And no one would miss them.” Wow all of this is too real why are we here why are we at this point. Calling them units instead of kids to make it easier. THEY’RE ALL SAYING DIFFERENT NUMBERS? THE 456 KNOW EXACTLY HOW MANY FROM EACH COUNTRY THEY WANT? OH GOD. 2,340,000 from America oh god. “325,000 is 10% of the childr- the, uh, units in this country.” WHY WHY WHY WHY WHY. WHO IS THIS DUDE SAYING “OH IT’S WORTH CONSIDERING COMPLYING” STOP IT. RICK. STOP IT. Also apparently he’s played by Nicholas Briggs aka the Daleks and Cybermen so hiiiiiiiii nice to see your face! NOW, TELL YOUR CHARACTER TO STOP SUGGESTING GIVING AWAY THE CHILDREN. Also this is Infinity War too. Dwindling resources. Instead of finding a way to make more resources, just kill people so whoever’s left can have more. Perfectly logical. If you’re Thanos. Come on Johnson. Come on girl. Start snooping into your bosses. “We are now facing the worst-case scenario.” Yep. From now on, they can’t call anything else the worst-case scenario. Nothing is worse than this. PM. DUDE. STOP PUTTING ALL OF THIS ON FROBISHER. “Which is out of my hands, over to you, sir.” Subtly fighting back just a little teeny tiny bit. Not letting him put anything else onto him. Good. IF ONLY YOU WOULD JUST QUIT AND WALK AWAY AND SHOUT ON THE STREETS WHAT THE PRIME MINISTER DID TO YOU AND IS PLANNING TO DO TO EVERYONE ELSE. I like the guy who wants it to be random. Dalek-Rick gave the genius suggestion of doing it alphabetically. Wow. Just get him out of here. Convincing the PM to go through with it, suggesting doing it alphabetically. Why is he here? Every second-born child? So I’d be taken since I’m a twin who was born a minute later than my brother by chance. But also I was 13 in 2009 so I wouldn’t have been considered, but STILL. SECOND-BORN IS DUMB. ALL OF THIS IS DUMB. “If this... this lottery takes place, my kids aren’t in it.” Uggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. I mean, I get not wanting your kids to be taken from you, but just ughghghhghghghhhghhghghhhhhhhhh YOU’RE NOT BETTER THAN ANYONE ELSE. “I’m sure the families of Gold Command will be exempted anyway.” “In fact isn’t that official policy?” Why are we here why are we here “Whatever happens, the children and grandchildren of everyone around this table will be exempt.” Oh, but everyone except Frobisher? Right? Ok but lady, I bet you anything your brother’s kids are not as bright as you assume they are. Not as “valuable.” You just have more investment in them than kids you’re not related to. What if you brother’s kids were evaluated and seen to not be valuable? Denise talking about good schools and failing schools while NYC has a debate over the SHSAT is also too real. Frobisher’s the only one horrified. Oh god oh god Jack and Ianto are going to Thames House oh no oh no no no no no no no. She’s been wearing those contacts for nearly 24 hours now oh god. See, I want to see what kind of outrage there was when someone finally figured out what the number meant and it spread to the general public. Oh Trinity Wells. She’s one of my favorite characters in the Whoniverse honestly. Love her. Just gonna leave a parked car in the middle of gridlocked traffic. Great. “This goes to you people listening in on the wire too.” IANTO YES. This scene where he tells Rhiannon how much he loves her and the kids is so much worse knowing Ianto’s about to die... Oh wow. I went from smiling to my face just dropping as I remembered. Ok Frobisher, I will admit that’s a well thought out plan to get out of this and avoid the blame. I will give you that much. BUT I STILL HATE THAT THIS IS HAPPENING AT ALL. “No one in this room is a willing accomplice.” Ehhhhhhhhhhh you’re the highest on the list since you enjoyed not having your name on this and never intended to take any credit. You had no stakes for a while while you gave Frobisher orders. So shut up PM.

OH GOD JUST POOR LOIS. GIRL SHOWS UP, THINKING SHE HAS A NICE LITTLE SECRETARY JOB FOR A SMALL BRANCH OF THE GOVERNMENT. GETS PULLED INTO A INTERNATIONAL AND INTERSPECIES CRISIS. AND IS NOW COMMITTING TREASON IN AN ATTEMPT TO SAVE THE WORLD. I LOVE HER. SHE’S BEEN THROUGH SO MUCH. AT LEAST TORCHWOOD AND FROBISHER AND THE PM KNEW ALIENS EXISTED AND WERE READY (to an extent) TO DEAL WITH IT. LOIS WAS JUST THROWN INTO IT ON HER FIRST DAY. And she’s handled it so well. God. Lois deserves all the appreciation.

God. Just watching her, I’m getting that feeling I get when I talk in class. The nerves, feeling all warm like I can feel the blood in all of my veins. Oh god I can’t imagine how she feels. “Oh yeah, you and whose army?” “Torchwood.” LOVE LOVE LOVE LOIS. LOVE LOVE LOVE THEIR SHOCKED REACTIONS. My girl Lois. Blackmailing the entire British Government. Your fave could NEVER. Oh god 13 more minutes in the episode. I wonder if Dekker and Jack ever met in 1965. Wait nooooo is Dekker about to die?!?!??!??!?!?!??!?!?! HE’S IN THE BUILDING. NOOOO DEKKER NO. Also yeah, the “computer lip reading” is just them editing the actors’ voices. Try harder Torchwood, you have Nicholas Briggs right there! The king of robotic alien voices! 10 feet away! Ooooh nooo Dekker why must you be in the building. “Happy now?” PRIME MINISTER. YOU HAVE NO RIGHT TO BE SPEAKING. THERE ARE MAYBE A COUPLE HUNDRED PEOPLE IN THAT BUILDING, DYING OF A VIRUS, AND YOU’RE ACTING LIKE IT’S WORSE THAN THE MILLIONS OF CHILDREN YOU ARE HANDPICKING AND PLAN TO GIVE AWAY TO BE USED AS DRUGS!??!?!!?!? GET OFF YOUR IMAGINARY HIGH HORSE. Ugh stupid bulletproof glass. Last time, I didn’t think Ianto was actually dying and barely reacted. It’s because I spoiled myself and saw that the only original Torchwood actors in Miracle Day were John, Eve, and Kai. But I thought Kai was Gareth’s name, and I assumed Ianto would be in Miracle Day, so I didn’t take his death seriously. This time, my eyes are a little wet. I rarely cry. Didn’t cry over either of Owen’s deaths, Tosh’s death made me shed one tear and then her goodbye video made me shed another. So. I’m not shocked I didn’t cry. But I actually felt sad this time instead of going “No, but he’s supposed to be still alive next season?” the whole scene. Frobisher. This is where you quit. This is where you get up, and walk away. Oh god poor Jack, remembering what happened. Ok. Ok. Gwen crying nearly got me. I got very close to crying just then. Gwen. Girl. Why you gotta make me sad?

Yeah so... everything sucks.

And I really did not believe that Ianto was dead. I was like “Ok but he’s gonna be back” and then I watched Day 5 and Jack flew away or whatever he does and then Gwen and Rhys go off with the baby and Ianto was still dead and I was like “...WHAT.” And then I reread the Tardis Wiki page for Torchwood (That’s what spoiled me) and saw it said “Kai Owen” and I clicked on Kai and I was like “...Oh... Kai’s Rhys not Ianto...” SO it was my own stupidity. BUT IN MY DEFENSE: I had been watching Torchwood nonstop for 3 days by this point. I had only taken breaks to sleep and eat (sometimes eating while watching). I did not look into any of the actors until after I finished Children of Earth. I don’t know when I had the time to look at the Tardis Wiki, but I did at some point in season 1, yet Tosh and Owen’s deaths at the end of Season 2 still felt like they came out of no where even though I should have known they’d be gone by Miracle Day.

See, when my brother watched Titanic for the first time, he’d managed to make it 16 years without being spoiled for the movie. Me? I’ve never seen it, but I was spoiled a long time ago and I don’t feel like putting myself through that pain so I kind of refuse to watch it. But he didn’t know what was coming at all. Apparently, halfway through the movie, he was so into the story that he forgot they were even on a boat, let alone the TITANIC, so once everything started flooding it was like he was slapped in the face by reality. That was me with Torchwood. I knew that Stolen Earth and Journey’s End only had Gwen, Jack, and Ianto since I watched Doctor Who first, but I didn’t really comprehend that that meant something had to have happened to keep Tosh and Owen away from that episode. And when they died it was like “Oh yeah. They’re on the Titanic.” except it was “Oh yeah. They weren’t in Journey’s End.” Kind of the same thing happened with End of Time Part 2. I didn’t question why Jack was on his own and would be single and therefore interested in Alonso, but once I watched Day 5 I was like “Oh yeah. Jack’s on his own and single by End of Time part 2.”

Basically, my horrible memory spares me from spoiling myself sometimes. Funnily enough, I saw the ending of Journey’s End when it aired because my mom watched it. I remember asking her why there were 2 Doctors, but didn’t remember until I was watching the scene myself after starting the show from the beginning years later. And when I saw the scene where Donna was forced to forget the Doctor, I remember saying to mom “Wait, what? Why did she just introduce herself?” and mom saying “He took away her memories of him” and once again, I didn’t remember that I’d already seen the scene until it happened.

So yeah. Everything about Day 4 is way too real. Especially because of what’s been happening this week. I’m almost glad I had to wait 2 weeks to watch it because the fact that this is kind of happening right now made everything SO MUCH MORE PAINFUL. BECAUSE IT’S NOT FICTIONAL. WHY IS THE WORLD THIS WAY? WHY DID PEOPLE LET TRUMP WIN?

Ok. So that’s it for Day 4.

Oh my god. 5 years ago this week, I watched Torchwood for the first time. I forgot to commemorate my 5th anniversary... I had planned to, but was too busy. NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO I missed it. June 15-18th (maybe early morning of the 19th) was when I watched Torchwood for the first time. Over 3 very, very, VERY intense days.

Also, every single shoutout goes to Lois Habiba. She’s the MVP. Love her so much.

AND IS DEKKER OK?

Update: pressed post before watching the preview. Dekker’s ok! Which doesn’t make sense since he should have been exposed long before he put on the suit, but whatever! Also. I’m not emotionally ready for Day 5.

[dailyaudiobible]

04/11/2019 DAB Transcript

Joshua 3:1-4:24, Luke 14:7-35, Palms 80:1-19, Proverbs 12:27-28

Today is the 11th day of April. Welcome to the Daily Audio Bible. I am Brian and it's great to be here with you as we move our way to the back half of the week and enter into the 101st day of our year together. Yesterday we finished the Torah or the Pentateuch, the first five books of the Bible and we began the book of Joshua and we’re just getting going, but this is a new era in the story. Today, today we will be crossing the Jordan River into the promised land. So, we’re reading from the New International Version this week. Joshua chapter 3 and 4.

Commentary:

Okay. So, we crossed over the Jordan River into the promised land today and you can just see the scene. A hoard of people crossing the Jordan River and setting up camp on the other side while everyone in the land is terrified, the closest city being Jericho. And, so, they would be on high alert. And what do we see happen here? Because what we see happen here is something we've been seeing happen and we will continue to see happen. So, the children of Israel, all of the tribes, they get to the other side of the Jordan River and what are they instructed to do? They’re instructed to bring 12 stones out of the Jordan River and stack them up representing the 12 tribes of Israel and that monument being stocked up, that pile of rocks as it were, is meant to be a memorial so that when future generations passed by, they can ask, “why are these pile of rocks here” and the story can be told. Oh, the pile of rocks is here because this is where we crossed the Jordan River. God dried it up and we crossed into this land, our homeland. The idea of creating a monument so that you do not forget what happened there continues until today, I imagine in all of our societies. I am most familiar with the culture that I live in here in the United States, but I’ve been all over the world, I've been in all kinds of different cultures and I've seen this very thing in all of them. So, like, there's a battlefield not too far from where I live, there's a monument because the battle happened there. It's been erected and placed there because it's a part of our American history, and it's left so that we, the future generations, and those in the future who come by this place and see this monument and wonder what happened there will be able to find out what happened there. I've seen this in all kinds of cultures. I've been at genocide memorials all throughout the country of Rwanda in back villages far, far away from main roads even or places where things happen that shouldn't be forgotten are kept as a memorial to remember. This is one of the reasons that we so deeply encourage journaling in some way as you take the adventure through the Bible and make it the rhythm of your life. If something is happening in your life that you need to not forget, or the Bible is speaking, God is speaking to you in some way, you should write it down so that you don't forget because then you can review and see the monuments in your own life to God's faithfulness. When you were standing at that battlefield and didn't know what was going to happen and then it worked out or you had to depend on God for dear life and you didn't know how you're going to make it, but you did. Those are memorials. Those are piling up the rocks so that you do not forget who you are and where you've come from and who God is, which has been ultimately the message of the wilderness, which is ultimately the message of any wilderness we face. So, we've tried to bake this idea into the culture of the Daily Audio Bible community as much as we can. I mean, you can’t just pound things over and over and over and over until they’re not heard anymore, but this idea of remembering where you’ve come from and writing it down as you're going to the Bible is part of our culture. You can take notes every day just using the Daily Audio Bible app, just little things that you might want to jot down that you don't want to forget, just like a scratchpad, but we have also designed carefully and intentionally the Daily Audio Bible Journal and it doesn't have a bunch…it's not to instruct you...like, here's how to make your life more efficient. It's just there for you to write down whatever it is that becomes apparent to you as some sort of revelation or some sort of memorial to kind of Journal your way through your life and see what God has done and know that in future generations your story can still be told. And it may be your story of God's faithfulness that actually sets right your great, great, great grandchildren. Who knows? So, yeah, the Daily Audio Bible Journal as well as all of the black wing line of pencils, that's what I use. I found those as my mom was in her final months of her life and I thought they were so fun…I…just so interesting to think…ha…I haven't written with a pencil since I was in elementary school. What would writing with the best pencil that can be made, what would that be like? And I just found a love for it. And, so, now I like to Journal in my own hand. I used to do it digitally, but I found that I journaled far less digitally. To just sit down and in my own hand, write my own story…yeah…there's something to it. And we see this established, this rhythm, this idea, this concept in the Scriptures. And we see it very clearly as we crossed the Jordan River today. So, all these resources are available in the Daily Audio Bible shop, but it doesn't take the Daily Audio Bible shop to write down your life. You can use the Daily Audio Bible app Journal free, no problem. All you need’s a piece of paper and something to write with, right, and a way to collect it. But it's good to find a way to journal your way through the Bible. If God’s gonna speak to you, you should take notes. So, check that out.

Prayer:

Father, we thank You for bringing us this far for giving us tools, practical tools like this, to chronicle the journey that we are on together with You. And as we just simply look back over the first 100 days of this year we can think of some things that You've spoken to us and then we can think of other things that were important, but we can't quite remember because it's getting just out of sight. And if we haven't written down then it's just becoming a part of the tapestry of our lives, rather than something that we can actually intentionally go back to and relearn and recommit ourselves to. So, we’re taking Your encouragement that we find in the Scriptures today to be more intentional about remembering what it is You're speaking to us and what it is Your…how it is that You are leading us. Help us to understand what placing memorial stones in our lives would practically look like. Help us to know how it is that we can create remembrances that we need so that as we pass by that territory again we remember what You've done, and so as future generations may pass by the story can be told. Come Holy Spirit we pray. In Jesus’ name we ask. Amen.

Announcements:

dailyaudiobible.com is the website, its home base, its where you find out what is going on around here.

Today begins the More Gathering for women. And, so, we have been here on Sharp Top mountain preparing for that since last evening and all of the buses and flights and cars will be arriving today for the beginning of the More Gathering. And, so, yet again, I just call out to the community here. Pray, ask God to put a bubble over the top of this mountain, where his Holy Spirit is just hovering. That is our prayer and we thank you for standing together with us as we move into the a More Gathering for women. It has been planned out for so long, it's finally here. So, thank you for your prayers.

If you want to partner with the Daily Audio Bible, you can do that dailyaudiobible.com. There is a link on the homepage at dailyaudiobible.com. If you’re using the Daily Audio Bible app, you can press the Give button in the upper right-hand corner or, if you prefer, the mailing address is PO Box 1996 Spring Hill Tennessee 37174.

And, as always, if you have a prayer request or comment 877-942-4253 is the number to dial.

And that is it for today. I’m Brian I love you and I'll be waiting for you here tomorrow.

Community Prayer and Praise:

Hello Daily Audio Bible family, this is Emmanuel. First-time caller. I am a listener. I am actually asking for all prayers __. Seeking a lot of love from God to speak into my heart. At this point it’s been a few months and a prayer request is to restore and help and heal my marriage with Karina. It’s been a really tough ride. We’ve been married 10 years, three beautiful children. It’s just come down to a very tough moment and she’s asking for divorce. I know I haven’t been the perfect husband, the perfect man, but I am trying to make some changes in my life to better myself. It’s not enough at the moment. I have given time and space for her as she’s requesting but I’m doing really things of love that God’s just asking me to not give up on my marriage. I just really need…really hi prayer. Brian, thank you for so much for sharing the word every day with us and family a if there’s anything I could ask it’s to please pray for us in this tough season. God bless you all.

Hi DAB family this is Tony the Painter. I just heard Victoria Grace’s prayer request and it kind of…it kind of hit me hard because I’ve got a son and a daughter who were adopted, basically I get told by a judge that I lacked the empathy to raise two small children, which I’m sure is legalese for you’re a man and we don’t trust you. But I’ve never once stopped loving my daughter and my son, but you just really reminded me to get on my knees and to pray for my daughter. And, so, Victoria grace every single time this week that I pray for my daughter I’m also going to say a prayer for you as well and for your brother. Just…yeah…it’s really hard because that’s one of my fears…is that I won’t to be there when my children come to find me. So, yeah, I’m praying for you. God bless you guys. God bless all of you. Thank you. Love you.

Good morning Daily Audio Bible and this is Heartbroken in Tennessee. I just was listening to the community prayer for the weekend of April 6th and I wanted…I didn’t get all the way through the complete prayer requests but I did hear one that touched me because I just went through the same issue and I think it was from Victoria out of Houston and she talked about not seeing her father or having met her father, her birth father of over 23 years and as she proceeded to try to find him and locate him he had passed prior to her seeing him and I just want to comfort you right now with that because I do not that feels. I went through something very similar. My dad, I’ve known him…at 15 was my last time seeing him and unfortunately, I did search for my father through the years and unfortunately through stubbornness and anger and resentment I didn’t do it fast enough. So, when I did finally do it I learned that he had passed away and I was so heartbroken because I wanted that opportunity to see my father. I did find his burial site. I did go and visit him and make peace with that and I believe that God had it that way because I think he didn’t want me to see my father in the condition that he passed away in. He had Alzheimer’s. He was 80 years old and perhaps that would’ve broken my heart even more, that he wouldn’t have even known who I was. So, sometimes God has things happen for a reason and I do that believe in that and Victoria I just want to send you my love and my comfort and just know that I know how you feel and know that God had a purpose for how things happened and why and hopefully you’ll have some conclusion with that with some peace and know that God did everything for a reason and at the…

Hi this is Toni from Germany and I’m calling for a couple reasons. One, Denise, I heard your beautiful, beautiful prayer request to help you proceed with what you feel the Lord has asked of you in regards to your relationship. And it’s a very, very touching and beautiful even testimony and prayer request and I’m sure they’ll be a lot of people calling in and I’m praying. I also want to shout out to see if Victoria…Elina from Victoria is still on and I’m remembering you in prayer. And I would like also to ask for prayers for the people that are providing for my parents in their nursing home and also for my parents. Hi mom and dad. Then, the other thing is…the main reason I called is I had a thought. Think about how many times we are meeting people wherever we are whether it be when we’re traveling or we’re calling someone for customer service…assistance…when we’re going to a store. And what does everyone always ask? “How are you doing?” How do we know if those people are not actually DABbers? And I have a suggestion. How about replying with…this year anyways…”I am Maintaining.” This is an indication that we are a DABber. And, so, it’s just a thought, you know. So, when people start asking me, “how are you doing” and if I’ve never met them before I’m gonna say, “I am maintaining” and I’m hoping that others will pick up on that for this year and that we will connect with our DABbers. God bless everyone. Love you.

[sapphiresassenach]

A Far Away Infinity

Sorry for the delayed update, especially with that cliffhanger. But exams are the worst. I am really going to try and finish this story up in the next few weeks. I intended for it to only be like five parts, but I think it’s going to be a few more than that! Anyway, finals are coming, so I am going to try really hard to write it all before I have to go back into exam mode. I hope you enjoy and as always, let me know what you think! Also, thanks again for all the love for this story :)

Part 1 2 3

Part 4 // I carry your heart with me ( I carry it in my heart) //

The focus of her last few hours of existence has been staring at a small scar on Jamie’s left arm. She had never seen it before. It was something he had acquired since he had left for the states. Just one more thing she had missed. One more thing she didn’t know.

Had his ex known about the scar? Did the perfect blonde with the bright smile see him get the original cut? Did she know the sound he made when someone bit his inner thigh? Did she know what his face looked like when he fell of the edge? Staring at Jamie’s coma-induced form caused her to question a lot of things.

The insistent beeping from his monitor faded in and out of the background as did the sound of the nurses and doctors shuffling around the outside of the curtains that made up his small room. The constant beeping gave her comfort though, for it meant he lived.

They had put him into a shared room after surgery, but she had used her connection to get him some privacy. And privacy was something that was to be cherished as the hospital was full of patients in need of rooms and care.

A delivery truck driver had fallen asleep at the wheel and plowed into incoming traffic, causing a massive domino affect of accidents in the city. Apparently, Jamie had been hit while walking on the side walk by a car spinning out of control.

The surgeon who had worked on and tried to repair Jamie’s crushed hand told her that he was lucky. If the car hitting him had been going only a little faster, the force would have crushed his chest, killing him instantly.

Lucky. Lucky seemed like a funny word as he lie on the small white bed, covered from head to feet in white bandages, sprinkled with red from the blood that had seeped through since his last change. She could never thought Jamie could look small to her, but he did. And she wanted nothing more than to cradle his head in her lap, but she couldn’t and it hurt.

It had only been six hours since she had seen him in the ER, but it had felt like 10 years. Joe had transferred her to the break room and had allowed her to wake from her shock-induced faint. The moment she had seen him there, bloodied and broken, something in her heart snapped. It had dropped to her stomach and she felt that it would never come back until she saw his blue eyes open and smile crookedly at her.

After he had come out of the surgery, all she wanted to do was see him, but he had been taken to get a skin graph for his back almost immediately after he had come out from his first surgery.

Calling Jenny had been hard, not knowing how or what to say. The call was at 2 a.m. and she didn’t answer her phone, so she had to leave a message.

 Jenny…I don’t know how to…I’m sorry I haven’t called…it’s Jamie. He’s hurt. You need to come to Glasgow. I’ll…I’m here, I’ll call if anything changes.

 The thought of seeing Jenny and Brian made her feel queasier then she already was. They would be waking up and calling her soon, no doubt.

But she tried not to think about it, just to concentrate on the feel of Jamie’s blood pulsing through the hands that she held tightly in hers and looking at his eyes, waiting for them to flutter open.

She talked to him almost constantly, telling him all her regrets, all the things she would have done differently, all the things she wanted.

“Jamie, I love you. You know I do. I didn’t want you to go to California without me. I want you to stay here. I wanted to marry you. I wanted to carry our babies and live at Lallybroch. I’m sorry. I’m so sorry,” she choked out through the tears, wiping her eyes on her sleeve. Wishing with all her heart that this could be like the movies and he would wake up at the admission of her love. But Jamie didn’t move, nor did his eyes open. 

The time slugged by, with each ticking of the clock a silent reminder that Jamie’s life was hanging in the balance. He lived somewhere in the limbo between reality and his mind. 

But nothing was worse than waiting for him to come out of surgery. She had had to sit in the emergency waiting room with other families weeping and shaking along with her. She was used to being on the opposite side of the room and there feeling was quite unsettling.

The trauma to his head was what scared her the most. She knew the moments in and after surgery were the most vital in telling how he would recover…if he would recovery. 

 The moment of truth would be when he woke from his induced coma. Or if he would wake up. Would he be damaged? Would he remember her?

God, the chaos of her head screamed and spun until she finally had to get up. Kissing his cheek lightly before hesitating and pressing a chaste kiss to his bloodied, chapped lips, patting his hand, she got up from her hard chair and stretched.

She would kill for a strong cup of coffee. She needed to be aware until he woke up. Hopefully, there would be some in the intern break room.

It physically hurt her, leaving his helpless form on the bed, but he needed this rest. Rest so his mind can try and repair itself from the trauma of not only the force that had hit him but from the trauma of the accident itself. He would wake when he was ready.

Reluctantly, she turned out into the bright hallway, squinting until suddenly the bright light was blocked.

 The man that stood before her wasn’t something that she remembered. Gaunt cheeks, pale skin, dark, black circles under his eyes. A shell of the man she had last seen when he told her to break her own heart and the heart of his son.

 “Brian?”

~Five Years Earlier~

The next few days were bliss. All she could think about was Jamie, which was slightly inconvenient because of her exams. They hadn’t been able to see each other much because of finals in the last few days, but they were in constant contact. 

Will ye come to Lallybroch this weekend with me?

The thought of the rolling hills and smell of fresh air made her almost relax. The city could be a bit much after a while. And the thought of returning to his land as his….a wide smile spread across her face at the thought. 

Of course ;) 

Her phone buzzed immediately. 

Pick you up Friday afternoon, mnd

Happiness flooded her and she was just about to put her phone away when it buzzed one more time.

 :)

She had told him in a late night phone conversation the other day that he was too serious of a texter in jest. The smiley face was his effort of being more silly with her. Butterflies made her stomach flutter in the best kind of way.

The beginnings were always the best. A time where possibilities were endless and anything could happen. She saw everything with Jamie, more than she had ever felt before. The future blossomed before her eyes. A few years of dating, a wedding, perhaps on Lallybroch’s fields in spring. A few children running around with his mop of copper hair and her eyes.

 They hadn’t discussed their intentions or what exactly they were to each other now, but she suspected that the talk would come this weekend as they walked at sunset through the fields and watched the sun dip below the horizon as they came together in the grassy hills.

Da had to come into town last night, we can drive back with him.

Sounds good! See you tomorrow. 

She walked around campus that day with the most ridiculous smile on her face. The thought of seeing Jamie tomorrow made her heart feel like it had grown three times in size. All she wanted was to kiss his red lips and hug him hard enough so he dissolved into her.

So, later that night when there was a knock on her apartment door, she flung her textbooks down. It had to be Jamie.

Running to the door, she ripped it open, almost embarrassingly fast, but she stopped herself short of jumping into his arms when she noticed that the man in front of her wasn’t Jamie, but his father.

“Brain? What-

She turned to see past him and if Jamie was jumping up the steps, but nothing. 

“I need to talk to you,” he said, looking down at her door mat with his mouth turned to the side. Her stomach did a flip-flop.

“Is Jamie ok?”

The pounding of her heart that was starting calmed a little when he looked up and tried to smile and shook his head.

“Jamie’s fine. I just came from a quick dinner with him. Though, he rushed me out to keep studying, but I’m proud of my boy,” the smile became more genuine as he spoke of all Jamie’s hard work.

“May I?” He inclined his head towards the inside of her apartment 

“Oh, of course,” she opened the door to him and stepped aside as he walked in, glancing behind him one more time to see if Jamie was there.

Sighing, she shut the door and shuffled into the small living space she shared with her roommate as Brian sat down on the sofa.

“I ken yer disappointed that Jamie’s no here,” he smiled at her and motioned for her to sit. “Trust me, all he did was speak of ye at dinner.”

Looking down with red cheeks, she smiled a little, trying to understand why he was here. Not that it was strange all together. He, Jenny and Jamie had been to her place more than once and she did love those visits, but Brian certainly had never dropped in without notice or without one of his children.

Reading her mind, he said, “I ken yer wondering why I am here without Jamie, but I needed to talk to ye about something important.”

Folding her hands in her lap, she nodded and waited for him to continue, her nerves revving up again as he fought for the right words. Did he not like she was with Jamie? He and Jenny used to joke about her and Jamie running Lallybroch with their 10 children all the time. But now, when that image may be coming a little more realistic, his face was far from joyous 

“Claire…ye ken that I love ye. If circumstances were different, I would be over the moon that ye and Jamie were together.”

Looking out the window, he hesitated again.

“But…” she said, trying not to let the tears she felt brimming in her eyes escape. 

“You know that Jamie was offered a position to work under a world renowned editor in California,” he spoke, looking back to her and reading the shock on her face.

“No, I didn’t,” she said quietly.  

“Well, I suspect he didn’t want to tell ye yet, but he has only know for about a week.”

A week. So, he knew when they were together the other night. Her mind was spinning out of control. California? That may as well have been a different planet. Had he accepted already? Brian interrupted her thoughts.

“Now, you’ll see the problem. Jamie won’t want to leave ye and I ken you are staying here for medical school since ye got a full ride, as ye should,” he smiled at her. “Congratulations, by the way.”

Sputtering out, she managed to find a few words. “How did you know that? I haven’t even told, Jamie.”

“I ken someone who works at the hospital, they told it to me in passing today.”

Her mouth was open as she fought for words. “I-

“But ye canna keep Jamie from this opportunity,” Brian put his hands on his knees, looking at his spread fingers, not making eye contact as he spoke. His tone was almost desperate, like he was begging her to let him go.

Feebly, she tried to respond without breaking down.

“We can do long distance,” she started to say but Brian was already shaking his head. “And maybe he wants to stay here, he always wanted to run Lallybroch someday.”

“No! He canna stay here,” he said harshly, then cleared his throat and looked at her apologetically. 

“No, I ken how he looks at ye, he would never have his head about him if he spent all his time thinking about ye and the next time he will see ye.”

Brian got up and walked over to her, putting a hand on her shoulder.

“He loves ye, Claire. He always has…and if you love him, you will do what’s best for him.”

He patted her shoulder one more time and then walked out the front door, leaving nothing but pain in his wake.

Continued here