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fantasticworldoffanfics · 7 years

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TOP FAVS (DEREK/STILES)

Fandom: TeenWolf

Pen Name

Author: rootbeer

Summary: Anxiety (/aNGˈzī-itē/): A feeling of worry, nervousness, or unease, typically about an imminent event or something with an uncertain outcome. ~~ "The set was busy; people bustled about with their various jobs. No one seemed to notice, or maybe they just didn’t care, as the gangly boy looked about nervously. He was all skin and bones, a track of moles across his light skin. He carried a bag across his shoulders, a coffee cup in his left hand and a curious look on his face. There was nothing remarkable looking about him at all, and perhaps, that was the most remarkable thing."

DILF

Author: twentysomething

Summary: "Today is Scott's first day of kindergarten and Derek is terrified."

**sidenote: you need an AO3 account to view this fanfic

Fireman Derek's Crazy Pie

Author: owlpostagain

Summary: “He can't blame me for the fact that I live in a building full of people united in the singular effort to ogle Hot Fireman as often as humanly possible."Laura laughs, loud and echoing in the empty restaurant."Hot firemen can make a girl do crazy things," she agrees, nodding towards her brother's name on the menu. "Derek won't let me date anyone from his company, but that doesn't mean I can't appreciate the eye candy.""Send them my way," Stiles suggests, finally loading up a forkful of pie. "Apparently I'm incompetent enough that I need to be babysat at all times, because it would be cheaper than dispatching a truck every time I try to use a kitchen appliance."

Prince Among Wolves

Author: tylerfucklin (Zimothy)

Summary: Looking for full day/evening sitter. 2 twin boys age 4. Must have exp. w/werewolves. Must be human. No pedophiles. No teenage girls. Pay negotiable.

This Quiet Torment

Author: oblivions172

Summary: Derek has had a crush on Stiles, a young omega who goes to his school since he first laid eyes on him. He has watched him continually come to school with bruises and flesh wounds delivered by his abusive father and all he’s ever wanted to do was help but Stiles never let him get close enough. Until, one night, Stiles ends up at Derek’s house, with more than a flesh wound and Derek will do everything in his power to protect him.

Fly a Little Faster

Author: mirrorkill

Summary: Everyone knows when you go back in time, you shouldn't step on an ant, just in case you accidentally kill your own grandparent or something. But what happens when you go back in time and, uh, accidentally interrupt the one event that apparently made the Grumpiest Alpha in Town into a ball of mindless manpain?Well, if Marty McFly can do it, so can Stiles Stilinski. All he has to do is get Derek and Paige to fall in love before he gets pulled back to his own time. And before he makes anything worse. That's easy as pie, right? Right?

In the Solstice of Our Hearts

Author: ravingrevolution

Summary: "You're not putting that up your butt," Scott told him flatly and Stiles couldn't stop the pissed off whine he made, but his friend continued. "Stiles, you can't put that up your butt, you know that. Your butt won't be ready for anything to go in it until-""Okay, okay!" he said, flailing his hands to stop his friend's lecture. "Message received, no butt stuff until I'm pounced on by some freaking animal in the forest and ravished to within an inch of my life. Got it. Thanks, Scotty, I mean heaven forbid I actually try to take control of my life and give myself a fighting chance or anything.""Not all alphas are animals," Scott said quietly.Maybe he was right, but Stiles wasn't holding his breath.

His Only Defence

Author: LunaCanisLupus_22

Summary: Stiles had just accidentally challenged an alpha.Oh God, and Scott had just stood by and let him do it. He was the worst best friend ever. Stiles was going to kill him. Except, oh right, the alpha was going to kill him first. Like beyond dead, ripped into tiny little pieces dead. So far dead that his dad would not be able to identify him, dead.

The Undisclosed

Author: Taila_Tai

Summary: For once the pack doesn't panic when a new hunter arrives. The gleefully sadistic man has labelled himself a collector of all things rare in the supernatural world and wants one of the rarest creatures; a werefox. Content that the pack is safe, the wolves focus on why their human member is acting so strange, ignoring the fact that Stiles only started once learning who the man wanted...

Pack Wars

Author: miss_aphelion

Summary: Scott liked to call it the Great Pack Divide of 2012.Derek liked to call Scott an idiot.(Or the one where Derek kidnaps Stiles to teach Scott a lesson, and ends up learning a few things himself)

Alpha Magazine 'Verse Series

Author: WhoNatural

Part 1: Not Like Bond & Moneypenny

Summary: (AKA, the Ugly Betty AU where Stiles is totally Betty)Stiles thinks he’s finally getting a break when a job at the sleek, sophisticated, Alpha Magazine opens up - but soon realises he’s not going to be writing anything and instead is playing tutor-slash-babysitter to their new Editor-in-Chief. Derek’s spoiled, grumpy, in way over his head...and so painfully attractive it makes Stiles want to lick his face. So there’s very little choice in the matter.

Part 2: What Bond Did Without Moneypenny

Summary: The lost months in Not Like Bond & Moneypenny, in which Derek pines, Laura tries not to meddle, Stiles blogs, and everything works out in the end.

Part 3: After Bond Got Moneypenny

Summary: After all they went through to get here, it should be plain sailing from now on, right?

Kindred Spirit

Author: Stoney

Summary: Anne of Green Gables/Teen Wolf AU. [ You do not have to know AoGG to follow this fic, it would only enhance the reading experience. :D ] Essentially the world of Teen Wolf set in the late 1890s, with themes and some minor character names/places specifically borrowed from Anne's world (and no disrespect meant to LM Montgomery, because I love Anne Shirley to bits and pieces.)Stiles is the adopted son of the Sheriff, brought to Beacon Hills to hopefully stay for good. A family, a best friend, school, Jackson as Josie Pye (because who else could he be?) and the mystery of a dark haired, green-eyed boy which leads Stiles to discovering a secret within himself.

Gravity's Got Nothing On You

Author: zosofi

Summary: “Three weeks,” Derek says.“Still don’t want to,” Stiles says.“I’ll pay you,” Derek says, and that… that has Stiles interested. Alf’s Antique’s may be a great job, but it’s not a high-paying job, and half of Stiles’s tuition is coming from financial aid, so…“How much,” Stiles asks, “are we talking here? Because I know your family, dude. And it’ll be kind of awkward after.““My family thinks you’re some sort of fucking gift to the world,” Derek seethes, like he’s jealous, “they’ll probably be pissed at me when we break it off, so don’t worry about that. Five hundred bucks.”“A thousand,” Stiles says, because screw ethics. Also, the Hale family is loaded. Derek can deal.

The Skies Above are Blue

Author: Trelkez

Summary: Derek is a wedding DJ. Stiles just happens to go to a lot of weddings.

The Amber of the Moment

Author: redhoodedwolf

Summary: Ever since he was eight years old, Stiles had been running. Fate decided it was time to stop.

Academia Series

Author: KuriKuri

Part 1: Hemingway Can Suck It

Summary: “For those of you who just transferred into this class or simply decided that day one wasn’t important enough to attend, I’m Professor Hale. Welcome to English 346, The American Novel.”Stiles is pretty sure his mouth is hanging open right now and that his eyes are wide with shock, because holy fuck, he thinks he knows why his students transferred. Hell, if he was still an undergrad, he probably would have transferred, too.

(Or: In which Stiles is a Biology professor and Derek thinks he's a student.)

Part 2: Misinterpret Me Like Lolita

Summary: “You don’t even know the course name?” Derek growls after the guy blushes and stutters out an answer, because, Jesus, he thought the university had standards.And it sounds like the course the guy is describing is his. Isn’t it just his lucky day? No breakfast and another student who doesn’t give a shit about the course material.This class is going to be hell – he’s calling it now.

Part 3: Leave the Black Light

Summary: “We shouldn’t,” Derek protests, although the way he grips Stiles’ hips a little too tightly betrays what he really wants. “There’s another class in here in less than half an hour.”“Then I guess we’ll have to be quick,” Stiles says, unconcerned. “Good thing I came prepared.”

Tonight, the Fox Hunts the Wolf

Author: LucifersHitman

Summary: Stiles always knew finding a mate would be hard for him. He's not bright and beautiful like Lydia, or strong like Danny or adorable like Scott.He was just Stiles, fox kid with ADHD who loved to draw. Derek Hale was everything, popular, strong, smart and gorgeous.They get put together on an English assignment and it doesn't go at all like Stiles expects.

Honey Eyes and a Wolf's Heart Series

Author: Underestimated_amateur

Part 1: Pup and Kit

Summary: Derek is eight when he first meets Stiles. Peaking over at him from the end of the bed, he stared in awe. The thing was so small and chubby with lovely pale skin covered in the cutest of freckles. The little one didn't even have hair yet, just fuzz on top of his head. And the prettiest amber eyes he's ever seen.

Part 2: It’ll Be Okay

Summary: Derek was nine when he first stayed the night in the Stilinski household. Stiles was a few months past one year old.When the door suddenly opens, he races in like a man on a mission. Listening to the two other heartbeats in the house, he quickly knows which one is the one he's looking for. Stiles.

Part 3: Sourwolf

Summary: Derek was eleven when he learns the answer to a question that's been burning inside his mind since he met Stiles. Stiles is three when he shows the world what he is. Eleven was also the age when Derek begrudgingly gets a nickname that'll last a lifetime.

Part 4: Wishing Flowers

Summary: Derek is twelve when he teaches Stiles about wishing on flowers when the little one visits him. Stiles is four when he knows for sure what he wants.

Part 5: My Batman, My Catman

Summary: Stiles was in first grade when Derek learns he has to share sometimes.

Part 6: Innocent Lips and Locked Fingers

Summary: Derek is fifteen when he first takes the little one out by themselves. Stiles is seven when he gives his first kiss.

Part 7: Cindered Wreckage

Summary: It was like a story how everything played out. Like a tragedy his mother could've read to him from her library when he was younger.Derek is fifteen when he feels broken.

Part 8: Hiraeth

Summary: It's been a year after the disaster, but sometimes Derek comes back to his broken home.He is sixteen when he learns what it means to grieve. He is sixteen when he re-lets people in.

Part 9: Taking a Shot

Summary: Derek is seventeen when he finally plays a basketball game. Stiles is nine when he sees his first game.

Part 10: Healing

Summary: Derek pays a certain someone another visit.

The Noble Tie That Binds Series

Author: minusoneday

Part 1: There Is A Brotherhood

Summary: So far, college has taught Stiles three things:1) Eight am classes are cruel and unusual and should be avoided at all costs, even if it means having to enroll in something truly hideous instead, like Econ 101.2) Dorm security is just as tight as Stiles’ orientation leader had promised it would be, and the dude guarding Scott’s dorm in particular does not respond well to bribes.3) Mrs. McCall clearly had no clue what she was talking about when she’d insisted that Scott and Stiles needed to branch out and room with strangers, so it’s all her fault that Scott ended up with a total dick of a roommate and Stiles got stuck all the way across campus with some guy who has a girlfriend two towns over and is thus never around.Or, the one where pledge brothers Stiles and Scott start a prank war with Derek Hale's fraternity.

Part 2: Your Lifelong Membership is Free

Summary: Uncle Peter’s spent years regaling Derek with tales of his time as President of the Alphas. Derek’s paid close attention, because Peter’s stint as President is a pretty comprehensive guide on ‘How to Successfully Run a Fraternity into the Ground,’ so Derek plans to do the opposite of what Peter did.***A Derek POV to There is a Brotherhood. In which Derek's life is hard.

Fang & Fur Series

Author: heartsdesire456

Part 1: Somewhere I Belong

Summary: When Stiles got an interview for an internship at Fangs & Fur magazine, the publication owned by the well known and widely respected alpha Talia Hale, he never expected it to be offered an actual job by Alpha Hale herself. He also never expected for his life to change so much after he met the man whose department he was assigned to.Stiles was not prepared for Derek Hale's cub, either.

Part 2: The Same Chains That I Kept You In

Summary: The story of how Peter and Chris got together in the Fangs & Fur 'verse“Why are you so annoying?!” “Because I CAN BE!”“Oh wow, that’s so mature, Hale-““Oh bite me, Argent!” Stiles was actually impressed by how long Peter and Chris had been fighting. He looked at Derek, who was holding out the book he was reading to show Alex the pictures where he was sitting in Stiles’s lap. “Dude, are they okay?” he asked softly, nodding to the doorway where Chris and Peter kept reappearing.Derek turned back just as Peter stalked past with Chris following him, arms waving as he argued with him. “Oh yeah, this is a near-monthly thing,” he said, and Stiles raised a skeptical eyebrow.Series

Part 3: A Gift From The Easter Bunny

Summary: SummaryStiles and his father are invite to the Hale Pack Easter Celebration.Stiles get's a special Easter Egg in his basket.

Part 4: Feelings That I’m Wrong

Summary: Stiles looked at him closely. “I know why Derek’s eyes are blue… but I’ve never heard anything about you.”Peter looked at Stiles and Stiles saw a slightly manic glint to his eye when he grinned predatorily. “Much like Derek was defending his cub, I killed another werewolf defending something I hold very dear,” he said bitterly. “It was kept out of the media by my sister’s influence, but it was actually just a few years ago.” He looked down at his drink, swirling the cup. “Let’s just say you don’t come to visit a pack and threaten the alpha’s baby brother’s mate.”

Part 5: Don’t Wanna Hear You Say Maybe

Summary: Stiles was getting really annoyed with Derek being secretive and excited over something he refused to talk about. All day at work Derek seemed distracted and happy but Stiles couldn’t work out why.

Part 6: Can’t Wait To Call You Mine

Summary: Derek and Stiles get married... and set up their friends.

Part 7: Baby Makes Four

Summary: When Stiles and Derek decide to adopt another child, they run into an unexpected obstacle that sends them down a painfully difficult path in hopes to adopt a child.

Part 8: New Beginnings

Summary: The start of the new year brought some changes to Fangs & Fur that nobody had really expected. The biggest of which shocked far more than just the Hale pack, or the company. It also shocked pretty much the whole supernatural community.

Part 9: Anything You Like

Summary: After an afternoon out shopping with his uncles, Alex asks a question that Stiles never expected (though he probably should have).

Part 10: A Very Hale Halloween

Summary: Stiles, Derek, and the kids get ready for Halloween night.

Part 11: In Memorium

Summary: On the 20th Anniversary of the Argent Terrorist Attack that took the lives of eleven people in the town of Beacon Hills, California, Governor Talia Hale gives a speech at a memorial event for the tragedy that killed her sister, her husband, and two of her children.

Part 12: I’m Thankful For...

Summary: Primary school Thanksgiving assignments and notes sent home from Alex's Pre-K teacher make Stiles cry.

Part 13: What’s Christmas Without A Trip to the ER

Summary: Stiles was just testing the lights to see which ones worked and which didn’t when there was a loud bang on the roof and the sound of a lot of smaller thuds going further towards the front of the house. He huffed and rolled his eyes. “Derek, be careful what you drop! You might break a hole in the roof!” he shouted, knowing Derek could hear him from inside.About five minutes later, Molly came skipping in. “Daddy fell off the roof and I think he has a booboo,” she said without preamble.Stiles jerked. “Daddy did what?!”

Part 14: Leaked

Summary: “In other news, Peter Hale, CEO of Fangs & Fur, the groundbreaking werewolf magazine, and brother of Governor Talia Hale, woke up to scandal today when racy photos of Hale and his husband were published on a website called The Den, a popular website aimed towards gay werewolves. So far Hale hasn’t been available for interview regarding the apparent leak.”

more top favourites

part 1, part 2, part 3, part 4, part 5, part 6, part 7, part 8

#Sterek #stiles stilinski #derek hale #teenwolf #fanfiction #fanfics #fanfic rec #tyler hoechlin #dylan o'brien #topfavs

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cinephiled-com · 7 years

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New Post has been published on Cinephiled

New Post has been published on http://www.cinephiled.com/interview-director-matt-tyrnauer-timely-lessons-citizen-jane-battle-city/

Interview: Director Matt Tyrnauer on the Timely Lessons of ‘Citizen Jane: Battle for the City’

Citizen Jane: Battle for the City is a fascinating and important look at what can happen when engaged citizens fight the power for the sake of a better world. Few people did more to shape our understanding of the modern American city than Jane Jacobs (1916-2006), the visionary activist and writer who fought to preserve urban communities in the face of catostrophic development projects. Director Matt Tyrnauer (Valentino: The Last Emperor) vividly brings to life Jacobs’ 1960s showdown with ruthless construction kingpin Robert Moses over his developments that would have devastated New York City, including his plan to raze lower Manhattan to make way for a crosstown highway. It’s a dramatic struggle over the very soul of the city, and one that we can learn a lot from today. I sat down with director Matt Tyrnauer at his Los Angeles office.

Danny Miller: What a riveting documentary! I was totally shocked at how close we came to losing such iconic and beloved parts of New York such as Washington Square and Soho. Do you think most New Yorkers know about this?

Matt Tyrnauer: Oh, no, not at all. Gore Vidal used to refer to this country as the United States of Amnesia. But there’s no question that Robert Moses was targeting two of the most popular parts of New York City today: Soho and Greenwich Village. He was trying to destroy them. At the time the West Village and parts of Soho were considered slums, but, of course, now it’s inconceivable to think of New York without those areas.

Which proves what a visionary Jane Jacobs really was, that she saw the value in these neighborhoods even if many people didn’t back then.

Exactly. That is really her biggest legacy. Jane Jacobs saw the brilliance of cities even when they were at their low point — and she understood the city in a much different way than the conventional wisdom of that time. This is why she’s worth knowing about. You can look at her legacy in two parts: as a brilliant author and journalist who wrote a classic book, The Death and Life of Great American Cities, which was published in 1961, but also an activist, which is an aspect of her legacy that is more relevant than ever in today’s political climate. She practiced what she preached and she took her concepts of the city, which were considered avant-garde at the time, and applied them in a spate of activism in the 1950s and 60s that was part of the story of the salvation of New York City from the bulldozers of Robert Moses.

It’s amazing how little known she is today considering the effect her work had on how we view cities today.

There’s no question that her book and her activism had an echoing effect across the nation and the world. She had a major role in changing the doctrine of urban planning and the way we think about cities.

It’s so easy to see developer Robert Moses as a true villain in the film. Stepping away from today’s sensibilities for a second, can you look at any of his actions in New York and ascribe any noble motives to his projects? Getting rid of disease and squalor or finding ways to help the poor?

Well, there’s good Robert Moses and bad Robert Moses, and for me you can draw the line roughly at World War II. In the early part of the 20th century, Moses was part of the progressive movement in New York. This is very important and part of the brighter side of his early legacy which, unfortunately, was mostly erased by the second half of his legacy. The progressive movement formed to help the poor and disenfranchised — we know that most cities were terribly overcrowded and rife with disease and many social problems, and that there was no social safety net in the country to address these things. So the progressives spearheaded this — people like Eleanor Roosevelt and many others, including Robert Moses.

So what went wrong?

What happened is that the progressive movement was slowed down by the Great Depression and the Second World War — everything is put on hold. And then, afterwards, this command and control style , the notion of a Big White Man in Charge top-down vision of how to run the world pervades because that’s how we won the war. Robert Moses was relatively mature in his career at this time and very powerful and he starts to apply this top-down methodology to a kind of progressivism writ large that’s funded by federal dollars and he proceeds to remake the city in this sweeping way that Jane Jacobs soon realizes is extremely dangerous, if not evil. One of her great lines from her book is, “Urban renewal is not the saving of cities, it’s the sacking of cities.” This was a very radical notion in the 1950s and 60s.

I can imagine how many people at the time saw things like the low-income housing projects that went up during this period as a good idea and yet we now know they were immediate failures. I’m from Chicago, and thank God we’ve seen most of these structures come down in recent years. But at the time do you think Robert Moses and others truly believed that buildings like this were good modern alternatives to the ramshackle tenements?

Oh, it’s very complicated. There were no monolithic answers to these problems, and an important part of Jane Jacobs’ legacy is the idea that these one-size-fits-all approaches to the issues of city squalor and urban decay were ill-founded. The ideas of Le Corbusier which were founded on noble ideas of getting people out of slums seemed very sexy and modern in the 1920s and 30s when they were introduced. Le Corbusier was a great marketer, really, his drawings were great looking, the sleek modernism of these schemes was very attractive, and people were ready for something new. When it came to the matter of city planning, everyone bought into it, and there’s no question it was much cheaper to build.

And with the changing technologies of the time, I’m sure it seemed to make the most sense to build up.

Right, certainly with the invention of the elevator. All of things were coming together — why not try something new? I’m sure it all seemed terribly exciting at the time. But the way that it was implemented was deeply flawed. Wipe the slate clean, and it also involved a kind of social engineering. If you’re doing that in the name of some utopian project, which is sometimes what they were professing to do, fine, maybe that’s a decent experiment, but they very quickly saw that things weren’t going right. Jane Jacobs saw this very early, as these projects were starting to be built. So why didn’t the whistle get blown, why did it all continue for so long? I would venture to say that the reason it didn’t get changed is because the people who were using these projects, the people they were being built for were generally minority populations.

With no power whatsoever.

Right. They didn’t have a voice, and the system was rigged against them. As James Baldwin said at the time, “Urban renewal means Negro removal.” A sociologist in our film says that what Baldwin means is this was an assault that meant that if you were African American you should go someplace over there and die. I think that’s a harsh reality we have to reckon with. Many of the projects did have that as a result.

So what might have started out as a progressive idea quickly turned into something much more nefarious.

Yes. Jane Jacobs saw that and wrote a book about it, but it took a long time for people to absorb this reality that she was presenting. Eventually it did get absorbed.

And now, in Chicago, for example, I know that many of the old high-rise housing projects are being replaced by low-rise housing.

Exactly. And it’s not unreasonable to say that you have Jane Jacobs to thank for that. People like Robert Moses were saying, “If you don’t build tall, you can’t get enough people in.” But even back then Jacobs was saying that this was simply not true.

And her other ideas about what makes a functioning city were fascinating.

Jacobs doesn’t just focus on crime and the decay of the projects, she talks about the city as being a lively, interesting place, and a lot of what she assailed planners for was building dull, regimented, antiseptic environments. She believed that cities were social networks and the results of individuals each doing their own thing and mutually supporting each other. And when everyone contributes and there’s that kind of diversity and individuality, it functions like a mega-organism made up of many individual parts — that’s the miracle of the city. The “clean slate” solutions to urban problems eradicate all of that social capital and destroy the city. That was her major point.

And apart from all her issues with the negative aspects of the social engineering that was attempted, thank God her actions led to so many amazing buildings being saved from the wrecking ball — buildings that could never be replaced.

Yes, if you look at what Le Corbusier wanted to do in Paris, the section that certain buildings he wanted to build were intended to replace, it was the Marais, sort of the Soho of Paris. You can see that these architecturally significant and very beloved parts of cities were the places that were on the chopping block in the middle of the last century. And now it seems like utter madness, just as it seems like utter madness to have torn down Penn Station, but there was this “out with the old, in with the new” groupthink at the time that was sexy and appealing, It was marketed and there was a lot of big money behind it.

Was Robert Moses directly involved in the building of New York’s Lincoln Center?

Very much so, he was the driving force behind it.

Today there’s this mythology of how it replaced these horrible slums and that at least Lincoln Center was something that could be enjoyed by everyone, something that could conceivably benefit the whole city. Did Jane Jacobs fight against that development, too?

Oh yeah, she was very displeased with Lincoln Center.

Maybe my feelings are different about something like Lincoln Center because I’ve had many good theater experiences there, it’s not just some hideous rectangular office buildings that I’d never step foot in.

Well, before you and I were born, there was another metropolitan opera house that was near Times Square, the New York Symphony was in Carnegie Hall — another building that was supposed to be torn down but thankfully never was, the ballet was at City Center. Why not have those beloved institutions scattered around the city, why do you need them all in the same place? You need them all in the same place because someone like Robert Moses said you did. And he wanted to get rid of an area that was called San Juan Hill that was mostly Puerto Rican, and he didn’t care about those people or those homes. If you want to see what it looked like, it’s where they actually shot the movie West Side Story after all the houses had already been cleared out. It was made up of all of those wonderful brownstones that still exist farther up on the Upper West Side.

Okay, you’ve convinced me, I’m removing my approval of Lincoln Center! The miracle of Jane Jacobs is that she was actually able to fight against these big money interests and win some of these battles.

The system was rigged, which is why I think people are seeing Jane Jacobs’ lessons as so relevant to look at today. If you’re on the left side of things, you can see that Trumpism is all about collusion between rich people and government or in this case the fat cats taking over the government and making it into a kleptocracy. Robert Moses was a manifestation of that. In his case, I don’t think he cared about personal enrichment as much as he cared about power. But he made a hell of a lot of other people rich. For anyone in that period who was in the real estate game, Moses was your friend. That was the establishment, and the fix was in. It’s a sad story that continues not only in this country but around the world, and the poor are usually left out of the equation. That is one of the huge value of Jane Jacobs — explaining that to us in clear, understandable language and giving us a model for social action that can short-circuit that rigged system.

I don’t think you mention him by name in the film, but how does Donald Trump fit into this narrative?

Trump and Moses are similar. They’re both sons of New York privilege who never had to work for a living but were workaholics who were very interested in their own aggrandizement. But the comparisons only go so far because I think Robert Moses was actually a genius and a great intellect, somehow who could recite Shakespeare and Shaw from memory. I think Moses went very much off the rails, but you can’t make intellectual comparisons between them. Still, some of their instincts were very similar. They knew how to work the system, they knew how to work the media, and they both managed their public profiles very carefully.

youtube

Citizen Jane: Battle for the City, is currently playing in New York and Los Angeles and will be opening in other cities soon. Matt Trynauer will be doing Q&As at the Nuart Theater in Los Angeles following the 7:30 pm screening on Saturday, April 29, and the 2:50 pm screening on Sunday, April 30.

#Citizen Jane: Battle for the City #Jane Jacobs #Matt Tyrauer #New York City #Robert Moses #Interviews #What's Hot

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harmonizedheroine · 8 years

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Winter2017

I. Confused - Jan2

Here I am, sitting at the mesmerizing cliffs of dover pretending that I am making decisions that are worthwhile, writing words that I thought could offer me solace. It is my last year here and I fear that there is no clarity near, like I will always be drowning in the same relentless cycle of malcontent.

It’s almost choking me at this point, the thickness of the grime from that past year inching up towards my cranium, threatening to fill up my brain with its thoughtless dark.

But, at the stroke of midnight all of that passed. The silent orb of brightness escaped the shadows and caressed my face… “You’re so beautiful.” I melt under rays of endless summer that promise me joy, joy and nothing more.

I remember, there was a cloudy shine awaiting me outside, but I shouldn’t have left. What if I missed it. The chance, the opportunity, the perfect one.

But, there’s a whole year. A whole year to figure out how I can near my inevitable bliss because I know one day I can reach it. I can achieve happiness and I am willing to persevere whatever obstacles I must in order to do so.

“This is my year,” they all say each year. But, I mean it. This is the year that I take control of my life because fate is passing. I have to do something because if I don’t, who will?

So, this is me…and these are the ramblings of a mad woman. I can’t wait to spend the next year with you and I hope this post grows as long as….the Nile River.

II. Ability - Jan5

I want to be able to…

reach the moon with only the help of one balloon,

break through the walls with a single push…pop,

make my childhood last as long as infinity

time and record the blissful surrender into calamity

witness the dark and passionate affair with a soul that of Dorian’s

worry even the smallest person passing me by

capture the attention of an untamed lion with a gaze

because god only knows what I’d be without you.

III. Weirdo - Jan7

Dude, so apparently it’s #wastemytime2k17 because I have been scammed, yet again. Honestly, it would have been dope if Joanne the Scammer herself had scammed me, but alas...t’was not. So, basically, Nate is over which is a rough situation for me to be in, having had liked him and spent a lot of time with him for several months. I still have his bracelet. He gave me literally $170 worth of Vans and I can’t return a pair because I wore it BUT I plan on returning the other pair because it just feels wrong.

He literally ripped my heart out. I drove to Megan’s after I made up a very smooth excuse that my mom needed me home. It was 2am. It made sense. I just didn’t wanna cry in front him...So, I just dipped. Like...it was just a boozy night. What the heckaroons, 2017 is MY year. People have to stop trying to ruin my year. But, you see, that only ruined my week. I’ll get over it. No one is worth my year. And, in the coming months, I will forget all about it and him. I just need a little bit of time!

Donald Glover’s Weirdo is one of the best one-hour stand-up’s I’ve ever seen. It is insanely funny and I love Donald Glover because he is an absolute gem. It totally repaired my night. And I found out that I’m the bomb. Like what an L for Nate. Maybe it wasn’t meant to be. I mean...he doesn’t like Kanye which is like fine whatever I guess I get it. But, then he said he doesn’t like Frank Ocean because he’s too mainstream. I SHOULD HAVE KNOWN THEN. Also, he’s not into Star Wars??? I was shook.

I found out several things from my time with Nathan. If a boy says he doesn’t like the major things that I like....AKA FRANK FREAKING OCEAN (like who doesn’t like him), then that means that something is up. I also learned that I can be like really nice sometimes or...you know what I’m saying? Like I can be really really nice when people are really really nice to me. Reciprocation was a big takeaway word from this lesson. I honestly think that it ended because cuffing szn has officially concluded. Onto living life to the fullest. This is my year. And I can’t wait to makeout with cute college boys at parties again (haha kidding, but at the same time let me LIVE, mom).

IV. Quirky - Jan11

frick

frickity

frack goes the click clack

goon

fiend

shoots patoots

any form of the word baboon

baboon

baboonery

to be continued….

V. Takeaway - Jan12

I figured from a few posts ago that I learned something or, you know, a lesson from each of the boys that I’ve spent time with, whether short or long or recurring like Megan Fox on New Girl...it’s all a struggle. But, let’s take it from the start!

Ben - Cool cat. All I can take away from this is that we were both fetuses and it was the longest relationship that I’ve ever been in (1 year I think??), yet it wasn’t even one lol. But, he’s the bomb and we’re still really good friends. I guess I can take away from this that exes CAN be besties.

Nick - My on-and-off boyfriend. We’re currently off, obviously, and hopefully forever. I learned from this kiddo that I love funny guys, they’re the best. I was really sad to see junior Nick turn into a douchebag compared to the Nick I knew just a few years before. I learned that I don’t deserved to be cheated on and that boys can be boozy. It was just ratchet. And I’m dope. Also, friends with benefits works only in the rarest of occasions and please don’t enter that sort of relationship with you EX. Bad idea, buddy.

Ethan - He spent more time with video games then paying attention to me. Obviously, the lesson here is that that is completely dumb and I’m dope. Except, it also showed that drummers are my kryptonite (reference one of my two biggest high school crushes: Matthew Butler). But, yeah, I love video games and I can totally play and actually enjoy that shit because...they’re dope. But, it was just boozy.

Ted - Okay, this is the first boy to take me out on dates and it was literally so adorable and I loved how much effort he put into things because he liked me. We went to the city and the zoo and you know all of this cute shit. But, it was supposed to be casual. He was perfect and amazing, but it was destined to end. I learned that you can’t make someone like you. The whole time, I thought that he would maybe realize that he would want to actually be with me. FALSE. But, it’s okay. Because I still enjoyed my time with him.

Yash - Yeah, it was fun. But, I hate boys that love drama. I know he kept saying that he hates drama, but I literally told one person about Yash and he flipped shit and it wasn’t cute. Also, after a while, he stopped being all cute and nice. Not cute. I learned that assholes are never fun, to not take people’s shit, and that I deserve like waaay better lol.

Nate - He was absolutely too nice to me and he treated me fantastically. Totally sweet and caring and compassionate and kind. But, that can only amount to so much. That could only come to be so much, though, you know? From my last post about him, I could say that I learned liking a few of my major likes like Frank Ocean are kind of important. I want to talk to someone about everything, even like intellectual stuff. He was absolutely too good to me, but in the end I wasn’t enough. Which is okay because I’m enough for myself. I learned that nice guys definitely don’t finish last, that I’m a great girlfriend, and that I deserved someone who goes to the third floor (future me: I hope you remember what this means lol. I DESERVE SOMEONE WHO GOES TO THE THIRD FREAKING FLOOR, IS THAT TOO MUCH TO ASK FOR.

VI. Enough - Jan14

IM SORRY FOR ALL OF THE RELATIONSHIP POSTS... my love life is boozy and I promise to fill this szn-long post with more fulfilling and relevant life stories and shiz because this relationship drama is getting boring.

my relationships have all ended with one word in mind looming over me for weeks on end afterwards: enough.

i feel like i’m never enough. i get that boys like me, maybe even a lot do/could. but they never like me enough. i just want someone to care about me enough to not cheat and actively tell themselves that they would never cheat because…in all honesty, i think i’m a fairly good person. it’s not like im an awful girlfriend or even an awful person. you know…i get that people can “like” me, but they just don’t like me enough…enough to want to keep me in a real relationship, to try. because i try. i always try and lose myself to trying to make people happy, whether it’s with relationships or even just my friendships. i always exert all of my energy and find none of it reciprocated. and i guess im not really complaining, it just sucks you know?

all starts with nick. im not enough for him to stay loyal (these hoes aint loyal). for ted, i wasn’t enough for him to keep once northwestern started. for yash i wasnt enough for him to not eventually treat me like trash, straight up. for nate, i wasn’t enough to put his faith in, until college and maybe even further.

like i hate getting my hopes up, waiting for something that would never happen, and just trying so hard to care about people who couldn’t even…i dont know. its just…im tired. im so so tired and so discouraged and boys keep treating me like trash and ugh.

it might sound dumb or whatever, but i feel like i deserve more than this at least. because im enough for myself and that’s for sure. so if im not enough for other people, then that’s on them. seriously.

what just tears me apart is the whole nate thing right now. like yeah for sure im talking to danny right now and he’s an absolute dreamboat, but the whole nate situation still manages to upset me, you know? like he’s literally pretending that i don’t exist. it’s like we don’t know eachother. and he doesn’t wanna date me because college. well yeah, but that’s in 7-8 months. Also…I’m not the type of person to cheat or leave someone as soon as I see the first cute person at college. I feel like I would care more than that. rough. yet another case to validate the fact that nothing ever goes.

so here i am now, going back to my fall go-to of “casual” things with people. because i don’t want to cry over a guy again. freaking 2017 is my year. im over it. lmao. sorry i just needed to rant, please don’t read this :/

VI. Scammed - Jan20

There has been an update.

I’ve been informed by Megan and Max, two excellent sources, that I was, in fact, scammed by Nathaniel. So, it turns out that he kind of used me to see if he could get over Corey. Throughout the two-three months, I was actually just part of a social, personal-discovery-esque experiment. A lab rat, of sorts. Which is absolutely bogus, in my humble opinion.

So, right after he broke things off with me, he goes straight to Corey, pours his heart out to her, says he still loves her, and they kiss. Fast forward to him bringing her to the opening night of my show, the school musical which he damn well knew I was in. I didn’t know about the whole “Still In Love With Corey” thing at the time, so I freaked out to Megan and was super down about what I was hypothesizing was them being back together.

So quick for him to jump the boat. Anyways, after that, I heard that Corey told him she doesn’t want to be in a relationship again. Sucks for Nate, truly. And I really have 0% desire to be petty about this and talk about how karma had it coming for him. Because I don’t believe that.

Out of all people, I would understand very well the situation he was in. To like someone, but still be in love with the last one. I think I was just super unlucky to be caught in the crossfire of something happening. It’s kind of like Ross’ girlfriends throughout the show. Everyone knew he would end up with Rachel because he always loved Rachel and those poor girls in between were just unlucky people caught in the crossfire. Yeah, he liked them. But, Rachel was always the one. I’m not Nate’s Rachel and that is absolutely fine with me.

If I think about it, in the long run, it wouldn’t have worked either. He doesn’t know anything about politics and I love talking about politics. He hates Frank Ocean, Chance the Rapper, Kanye, and literally just everyone that I like but listens to heavy metal all the time because it has amazing drums YET he doesn’t like rock and alternative rock because???? He doesn’t go to the third floor. And he’s not planning to go to college and I am. I want someone who can care about me, make me laugh, and who I can talk to about anything. And it just wasn’t there with Nate.

(also, megan and max said it wouldn’t have worked out anyways because he’s a virgo and i’m an aquarius. sounds like bullshit, but i read up on it and it all was so real so i guess that theory checks out)

What I’m really just upset about is that I had to be the pawn in this. I wish I was just left out, that I never had my feelings hurt. You know what? I actually take that back. I wish that he told me the truth when he broke it off. You know? “I really like you, but I think I’m still in love with Corey and I’d hate to hurt you while I’m still confused and going through this,” would have been a lovely approach at breaking it to me. I wish you told me this BEFORE I wasn’t New Years hanging out with you :/ Well, whatever. New year, new me (minus Nate!)

VII. Questioning - Jan22

I just don’t know where I stand in the world right now.

I’m sitting here, on my couch, crying more than I have in a long time because I am so afraid that my parents won’t love me no matter what.

I was born into a faith, a life which was chosen and destined for me. Roman Catholicism would be my religion and that was the final word. As I grew up, with the influence of my environment and the people that I’ve come across throughout my years, I’ve slowly but surely come closer to finding who I am. And, with that, comes doubt. For a really long time now I’ve had so much doubt in my religion and so many questions and...it strikes me. What is the purpose of it all? I understand the reach it has for certain people; I understand the bond and importance of this religion and its impact on so many lives. But, I just don’t know if I believe in it all. I mean, of course, I think I do. But, was I just conditioned to think that way? Is this all the culmination of my whole life being surrounded and pushed into this lifestyle? I’m so lost and have so many questions.

Less than twenty minutes ago, I asked my parents if I could skip church this week to study. I have so much homework because of the musical and I still have a shift pretty soon. Of course, my dad freaks out.

I understand that I have amazing parents who are completely not strict on me at all and I am so thankful for my freedom that’s been allotted to me. But, what struck me was when I almost made my dad cry when I said that I feel no spiritual connection in going to church anymore. “This isn’t how we raised you,” he said, voice painfully cracking. He walked away to get some water. I just didn’t know what to say. Because it was true. It was the full disclosure: I don’t understand why church is important for me to prove my faith. Why is there more importance placed on this one hour of the week then actively trying to spend time with me or get to know me.

I want my parents to know me: know what music I like and how much I love it, know my political views and why and just take time to understand instead of debate against it. I want to have dinner with my parents again because I just have not been home this entire year. I study so hard and I just...I’m missing part of myself to this.

What struck me during my tear-driven talk with my parents was when my dad said something about “non-negotiable” and I was hurt. “Religion is non-negotiable?” I’ve known for years now that I wasn’t planning on attending church in college, but I’ve never said it out loud.

I think that before you further your spiritual connection at things like church and mass, you have to establish your connections here on Earth. Show activism in your connections to people, show you care, and strengthen that before you try and “prove” it in a setting like church. I think that one hour does not define you and that you can be a fantastic person and Christian without it. I think I want to work on being a better person first. Of course, Catholicism helps in matters of after-life...faith of a world after this one. But, how can that work of there’s not importance placed on the life we have now?

There is nothing more that I value than what my parents think of me and I never want to disappoint them-- one could argue that that is my first priority. But, it comes at a price because I find myself sacrificing who I am to serve this false facade, giving them the perfect image of the daughter that they raised the “right way”...

I’m still lost and don’t really know where I stand on this. I don’t know. And I don’t think I have to have all the answers, at least not yet.

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