#Debbie is fascinating and it's been fun to really go and look at the show from her POV

[chris-hartley]

Happy Pride! Today I decided to double up on prompts. A two-for-one, if you will. Misunderstanding/Unhappy Ending! What could go wrong, right? Hahaha. Anyway, this is again about my Total Drama OC, Dannie. With a bit of backstory to her life before she was on the show hehe. Once again, as usual, if you want to learn more about these OCs, do check out the blog @teadocs for all the fun!

Danielle Sidney Tate was born to be a horror enthusiast. Her parents had met at a horror convention. Her mother, Debby, was dressed as Sidney, and her dad, Tim, was dressed as Billy. They’d never met before, but legend has it, a professional photographer for the con thought their costumes were top notch and wanted to get some shots of the two of them together. They went out for drinks afterward… one thing led to another… and 9 months later, Dannie was born.

From a young age she was fascinated by this picture she had of her parents. Despite the fact they were no longer together when she was born, she had taken to romanticizing the kind of spark that her parents’ must’ve felt that day. And she clung to it.

The first time she watched Scream, Dannie was 13. She had been bugging her mom to let her watch it for at least a year, and finally her parents had sat down and discussed it, allowing her to watch it with their supervision. And once it started, she was hooked.

Scream led to Saw which led to Final Destination which led to Halloween and so on and so forth until she’d made it through both of her parents’ DVD and VHS collections.

Eventually, she was old enough to drive herself to conventions. With her mom’s old Sidney cosplay on, she went in search of the same spark that led to her parents meeting.

She was in line to meet Matthew Lillard, when she bumped into someone and turned around to see a girl standing there dressed as Gale specifically from Scream 2.

“Oh, shit, sorry,” she apologized.

The girl smiled back at her, “Wow that’s a great Sidney cosplay,” she ran her hand along Dannie’s arm, looking her up and down.

“And that’s a spot on Gale.”

“You recognize it,” this girl’s face lit up, “I swear I’ve been ignored all day.”

“People just don’t know Scream well enough then,” she joked nervously, unsure as to why her hands were sweating.

“I’m Sophie,” she smiled.

“Dannie.”

“Nice to meet you,” she nodded.

The two of them spent the time they were waiting in line chatting. Eventually they got up to Matthew Lillard and each took their photos with him. Afterward, Dannie turned to Sophie and swallowed hard.

“It was really nice to meet you.”

“You too,” she nodded, “Mind if I get your number?”

Dannie was taken aback, and nodded, “Yeah. Sure.”

As Sophie took her phone and entered her number in, Dannie couldn’t help but feel the spark she’d been romanticizing all this time. She always figured it would be with… well… a guy. But there wasn’t a doubt in her mind this is what it must feel like.

So she took a leap of faith and when Sophie looked up, she leaned in for a gentle peck. When Dannie pulled away a stunned Sophie stood there.

“Oh fuck.”

“What?”

“No. I- I see how you thought- shit. I’m in a relationship.”

Dannie felt her face turn red, “I’m so sorry. You can delete my number and just-”

Sophie reached out and held her shoulder, “Don’t worry about it. I thought you were cute too. And we could still pull together a kickass group cosplay. Just… I’m sorry I didn’t mention my boyfriend sooner.”

“Boyfriend,” Dannie muttered under her breath.

“I’ll catch you later Dannie. Or should I say, Sidney.” She winked.

Dannie nodded as Sophie walked off.

“What the fuck was that,” Dannie muttered to herself, walking back out to her car.

---

[dreamylyfe-x]

God your ask responses are so good. The one about Debbie is super interesting. In a lot of ways she has signs of the person she becomes early on but I do think she changes a lot too. From the beginning of season 3 to the end of season 4 - less than a year in the show - it's like she's two different people. The difference in her concern for Frank, from 3x01 to "he's been dying for years", is so extreme. She also goes from being hyper-responsible and not all that concerned (at least outwardly) that she has no friends in s2 to making seriously, seriously awful decisions in the pursuit of finding connections with people outside her family, especially romantic partners. (Then again, maybe that was always there... I hope aunt ginger is doing well) Do you think those two big shifts are related? Is it just puberty? What do you think changed to make Debbie become the kind of girl who made the all wrong decisions Fiona was so sure she'd avoid?

Hey! First of all -- that you so much. That's really nice to hear.

Secondly, I'm sorry this took me a few days, but I was giving it some thought because I wanted to answer it with some real idea of what is going on with Debbie. I also went and watched the episodes you referenced. ☺️

I do think some of the changes with Debbie are straight up developmental. 4x01 starts with a montage that outlines for us that Debbie is now a teenager and is mirroring Fiona getting ready in the morning. This is clearly a shift that we're supposed to think happened between seasons and to that end, I'm cool with it. (I am not cool with, like, how time works in season 4 -- but we just have to accept that it takes place in a vortex where six months can go by, but it's always February.)

When my Netflix rests on Shameless it always plays the same clip -- Debbie making worried noises because Frank is missing, followed by the kids all going out to look for him. I remember watching the episode for the first time and thinking the divide between Debbie -- scared and upset -- and Ian, Lip and Fiona was something the show got right. Because part of growing up with one or more crappy parents is getting to the point where the switch flips and you realize that everything that's happening with them is complete bullshit, you can't count on them, and you've been worrying about them and caring about them far more than they've been worrying and caring about you. So inevitably, we were going to see each kid have their moment where they go from loving Frank the way kids love their dads to just shutting the door on it.

To get a little bit personal -- I come from a blended family and there's a whole mix of different parental figures in this situation, and not everyone is living their best parenting life. So I've experienced, and watched, several people go from being the kid who is anxious when their dad isn't where he's supposed to be, to becoming someone who will tell their dad to go fuck himself over breakfast. In my experience that shift happens really fast. Because the evidence of their parent being terrible has always been there, and it's like they just have to get to point where they review the evidence and once they have... they're angry.

Debbie shows up angry in season 4 and one thing I find REALLY interesting is that, in her first scene, she's angry about two things. First, the suggestion that she might forget that she's supposed to watch Liam (because Debbie is responsible, damnit) and then the fact that no one knows where Ian is and Fiona won't call the police. Puberty has clearly hit between seasons, but Lip and Ian have also moved out. AND Frank is gone, just like always. She goes to see Mandy -- who was helping her pick out first-day-of-school clothes in season 3 and that conversation ends with Debbie getting a door slammed in her face. You can definitely see how she might have gotten jaded about not just her father, but her whole family.

It's interesting to me that Debbie spends a day with Lip mid-season looking for Ian. That the desire to find one brother, and spend time with another is definitely present. And they find him. And he's frightening. Doesn't make sense, isn't acting like himself, doesn't want to go home with them. Developmentally it's natural for Debbie to start looking outside her family for connection, but also -- her family is getting more and more scattered and looking less and less like the reasonably cohesive people she grew up with.

Debbie does so many infuriating things, and so many of them make her look monstrous because she stomps all over people to make them happen. And that's where she gets Frank-ish, because she's always very "by any means necessary" and she doesn't seem to assume willing help very often -- she assumes she's going to have to trick people. I think part of the reason Debbie decides to get pregnant is because, at a very young age, she feels her older siblings pulling away, she understands her parents are never going to be there for her, and she wants something for herself. Looking at the stuff that is going on with Debbie in season 4, 5 and 6... she's finding herself alone and abandoned a whole lot. Fiona is ruling with an iron fist and won't support Debbie's desire to have a baby. Lip is gone to college and then dealing with alcoholism. Ian is struggling with mental health issues, but has also directed most of his focus on his boyfriend, and their makeshift family. Shelia leaves. Even SAMMI, who originally gossips with her about boys ends up sending turning Ian in to the MP. Debbie just spends season after season not being anyone's priority and not getting what she wants -- which is primarily love and attention. It does make sense that, eventually, she would become someone who just takes, because how else is she ever going to get anything? And when it comes to going after things, she is impulsive and has this almost child-like grasp on consequence -- but I think that might be because the hurt kid is the one in charge. All that too-young maturity and sacrifice to help everyone else left her feeling bitter and abandoned and like she has a right to something. And that's never a place where good ideas flourish.

[gardenerian]

Mel, I've noticed you've mentioned your abundance of feelings re: Monica a few times, but I don't know if I've read them (outside some thoughts in your tags). If you feel like sharing, I'd love to read your thoughts and feelings on Monica.

okay alright sure, feeling very normal about putting this into words, not nervous at all totally confident okay yeah here are my thoughts -

first off, i gotta say that I’m biased. i freely and fully admit that. there is far more grace in my heart for monica than there is for frank because there’s a part of us that’s intimately connected. as such, this isn’t so much a meta post as it is me trying to verbalize some very visceral emotions 😬

what compels me most about monica, like what i find so tragic about her, is all the ✨ what if ✨ energy baked into her story. what if she’d crawled through anyone else’s window instead of frank’s? what if she left him, but not her children? what if she’d stayed in treatment for the long haul? what could she have been? what if her terrible fucking choices weren’t so readily enabled, what if she had a partner who supported her health, what if she loved herself and her children enough to commit to them? to commit to her own stability? or like... was she always going to be like that? i don’t know. we can’t know. 

i firmly believe that two things can be true at once. monica was not a good parent. her illness did not cause this. ultimately, she probably should not have procreated. she made choice after choice that i would have fought against. but she was also a victim. she also suffered. she was so multidimensional, and it makes me absolutely insane when people write her off as just one thing. she was kind, but not when it mattered. she was selfish, but she loved so hard, even though that love was fleeting. she was warm, but she’d also burn them up. she was fun and so alive, but she valued fun and self-destruction more than her children.    

the gallagher siblings have every right to resent her. she did not do right by them, and she let them down at every turn. i understand why fiona kicks at her, why lip pushes her away. i get why ian is so fucking scared of her. debbie and carl are absolutely traumatized by her. liam looks at her and asks who she is.... like, this is their reality. when you have children, you really forfeit the right to tank yourself. as a mother, she failed in every sense. 

but as a character.... as a piece of a story..... as a story herself... i just think she’s something special. i can’t explain it. she’s important. she struggles and she suffers and she has such clear and specific experiences with this disorder that i can’t help but understand her. just a little bit. there are things that she does that make sense to me, just as there are things she does that make me want to shake her (this is true of every single character on this show, of course). 

i have monicas in my family. i am very lucky that they are not my parent. but i completely understand what it is to want someone to chose you over their indulgences and self-destruction. to want them to try fucking harder, to put the work in. to crave them and want them, but to also fucking hate them and then hate yourself for wanting them. like there are moments with these people where i have to duck out and remind myself that they are not my future. but i still see them. in a way, maybe that’s what monica is for me too. like she is for ian. i don’t know. she terrifies me, but she’s fascinating. 

[entamewitchlulu]

so i did a reading challenge this year and i wanna talk about what i read

transcription under the cut

i did Popsugar 2019 and wanna talk about what i read:  Book Reccs and Anti-Reccs 

1.) Becoming a Movie in 2019: Umbrella Academy (vol 1) by Gerard Way and Gabriel Ba

4/5. A fascinating take on superpowers, dysfunctional families, and the apocalypse. Can get pretty gory, confusing here and there and you have to pay close attention to panels for lore, but overall an entertaining romp.

2.) Makes you Feel Nostalgic: Circles in the Stream by Rachel Roberts

4/5. Middle grade novel about the magic of music, belief, and of course, friendship. Definitely written for kids, and has some unfortunately clumsy Native rep, but overall an absolute joy to dive into once again.

3.) Written by a Musician: Umbrella Academy (vol 2) by Gerard Way and Gabriel Ba

4/5. Ramps up the confusion to ridiculous degrees with some absolutely bonkers, unexplained arcs, but still fun to watch this dysfunctional family do its dysfunctional thing.

4.) You Think Should be Turned into a movie: All That Glitters by Rachel Roberts

4/5. Continuation of Circles in the Stream, but with more unicorns, more rainbows, and more fae, which makes it automatically even better than the first.

5.) With At Least 1 Mil. Ratings on Goodreads: 1984 by George Orwell   

1/5. I understand why it's important and all but wasn't prepared for some of the more graphic scenes and the overall hopelessness of the message.  Would not recommend or read again.

6.) W/ a Plant in the title or cover: The secret of Dreadwillow carse by Brian farrey

5/5. A fantasy world where everyone is always happy, save for one girl and the princess, who set out to solve the mystery of their kingdom. Poignant and great for kids and adults.

7.) Reread of a favorite: Cry of the Wolf by Rachel Roberts

4/5. Yet another installment in the Avalon: Web of Magic series, which clearly I am obsessed with.  Please just read them.

8.) About a Hobby: Welcome to the Writer's Life by Paulette Perhach

5/5. A welcome kick in the pants, chock full of great advice told without condescension, and full of hope and inspiration for writers both new and old.

9.) Meant to read in 2018: The Poet x by Elizabeth Acevedo  

4/5. Absolutely beautiful coming of age novel told in verse.  Do yourself a favor and listen to the audiobook version.

10.) w/ "pop," "sugar," or "challenge" in the title: Black Sugar by Miguel Bonnefoy

2/5. I think maybe I just don't understand this genre.  Or maybe the translation was weird. I was confused.  

11.) w/ An Item of Clothing or Accessory on the cover: Our dreams at Dusk by Yuhki Kamatani

4/5. It had a lot more slurs/homophobia than I was prepared for, but otherwise is a very touching, relatable collection of queer characters living in a heteronormative world.

12.) Inspired by Mythology or Folklore: Ravenous by MarcyKate Connolly

3/5. A girl goes on an impossible quest to save her brother from a child-eating witch. Really wanted to like it more because I loved the first one, Monstrous, but it dragged a little.

13.) Published Posthumously: The Islands of Chaldea by Diana Wynne Jones

3/5. I adore Diana Wynne Jones, but this one was missing some of the magic of her other books. Not sure if it was because it had to be finished by someone else, or if I just grew out of her stories.

14.) Set in Space: Binti by Nnedi Okorafor

4/5. Powerfully written story of a girl straddling tradition and innovation, who wields power through mathematical magic, surviving on a spaceship alone with a dangerous alien occupation after everyone else has been killed.

15.) By 2 Female Authors: Burn for Burn by Jenny Han and Siobhan Vivian

2/5. Ostensibly a story about a revenge pact in a small island town, but leaves far too many dangling threads to attempt alluring you to the sequel.

16.) W/ A Title containing "salty," "bitter," "Sweet," or "Spicy": The Price of Salt by Patricia Highsmith  

3/5. It's okay but I literally just never know what anyone means at any time. Are they being reticent on purpose or do i just not understand communication

17.) Set in scandinavia: Vinland Saga by Makoto Yukimura

2/5. Technically and historically accurate and well made, but the story itself is not my cup of tea.  Very gory.

18.) Takes Place in a Single Day: Long WAy Down by Jason Reynolds

4/5. A boy goes to avenge his murdered brother, but ghostly passengers join him on the elevator ride down. Stunning and powerful character-driven analysis.

19.) Debut Novel: Nimona by Noelle Stevenson

4/5. Charming and then surprisingly heart-breaking comic about Nimona, a shapeshifter who wants to become a villain's minion. Really love the villain/hero dynamic going on in the background, along with the dysfunctional found family.

20.) Published in 2019: The Book of Pride by Mason Funk  

4/5. A collection of interviews with the movers, shakers, and pioneers of the queer and LGBTQ+ community.  An absolutely essential work for community members and allies alike.

21.) Featuring an extinct/imaginary creature: Phoebe and her Unicorn by Dana Simpson

4/5. Incredibly charming, Calvin and Hobbes-esque collection of comics featuring the adventures of Phoebe and her unicorn best friend.

22.) Recced by a celebrity you admire: The Emerald Circus by Jane Yolen

2/5. Recced by my fave author Brandon Sanderson. An unfortunately disappointing anthology proving that any story can be made uninteresting by telling the wrong section of it.

23.) With "Love" in the Title: Book Love by Debbie Tung

4/5. One of those relatable webcomics, only this one I felt super hard almost the entire time.  Books are awesome and libraries rule.

24.) Featuring an amateur detective: Nancy Drew: Palace of Wisdom by Kelly Thompson

4/5. REALLY love this modern take on Nancy Drew, coming back home to her roots to solve a brand new mystery. Diverse cast and lovely artwork, though definitely more adult.

25.) About a family: Amulet by Kabu Kibuishi

4/5. Excellent, top tier graphic novel about a sister and brother who have to go rescue their mother with a mysterious magic stone. LOVE that the mom gets to be involved in the adventure for once.

26.) by an author from asia, Africa, or s. America: Girls' Last tour by Tsukumizu

4/5. Somehow both light-hearted and melancholy. Two girls travel about an empty, post-apocalyptic world, and muse about life and their next meal.

27.) w/ a Zodiac or astrology term in title: Drawing down the moon by margot adler

3/5. A good starting place for anyone interested in the Neo Pagan movement, but didn't really give me what I was personally looking for.

28.) you see someone reading in a tv show or movie: The Promised NEverland by Kaiu Shirai

4/5. I don't watch TV or movies where people read books so i think reading an adaptation of a TV series after watching the series counts. Anyway it was good but beware racist caricatures

29.) A retelling of a classic: Meg, Jo, Beth, and Amy by Rey Terciero

5/5. We can stop the Little Women reboots and retellings now, this is the only one we need. In fact, we can toss out the original too, this is the only one necessary.

30.) w/ a question in the title: So I'm a spider, so what? by Asahiro Kakashi

4/5. Cute art despite the subject matter, and a surprisingly enthralling take on the isekai genre. Love the doubling down on the video game skills.

31.) Set in a college or university campus: Moonstruck (vol 2) by Grace Ellis

2/5. An incredibly cute, beautiful, and fascinating world of modern magic and creatures, but unfortunately falls apart at the plot and pacing.

32.) About someone with a superpower: Moonstruck (vol 1) by Grace Ellis

4/5. Though nearly as messy plot-wise as its sequel, the first volume is overwhelmingly charming in a way that overpowers the more confusing plot elements.

33.) told from multiple povs: The Long way to a Small, Angry Planet by becky Chambers

4/5. Told almost in a serial format, like watching a miniseries, a group of found-family spaceship crew members make the long journey to their biggest job ever.

34.) Includes a wedding: We Set the dark on fire by Tehlor kay mejia

4/5. Timely and poignant, a girl tumbles into both love and resistance after becoming one of two wives to one of the most powerful men in the country.

35.) by an author w/ alliterative name: The only harmless great Thing by brooke bolander

3/5. Much deeper than I can currently comprehend.  Beautifully written, but difficult to parse.

36.) A ghost story: Her body and other parties by Carmen Maria Machado

4/5.  It counts because one of the stories in it has ghosts. A sometimes difficult collection of surrealist, feminist, queer short stories.

37.) W/ a 2 word title: Good omens by Terry Pratchett and Neil Gaiman

4/5. Charming, touching, and comical, probably the best take on the apocalypse to date. Also excellent ruminations on religion and purpose.

38.) based on a true story: The faithful Spy by John Hendrix

4/5. Brilliantly crafted graphic biography of Dietrich Bonhoeffer, and his assistance in fighting back against Nazi Germany.

39.) Revolving around a puzzle or game: the Crossover by Kwame alexander

4/5. The verse didn't always hit right with me, but the story is a sweet, melancholy one about family, loss, and moving on.

40.) previous popsugar prompt (animal in title): The last unicorn by peter s. Beagle

5/5. Absolutely one of my all-time favorite books, it manages to perfectly combine anachronism and comedy with lyricism, melancholy, and ethereal beauty.

41.) Cli-fi: Tokyo Mew Mew by Mia ikumi and Reiko Yoshida

4/5. Shut up it counts

42.) Choose-your-own-adventure: My Lady's choosing by Kitty curran

3/5. Cute in concept, a bit underwhelming in execution. Honestly, just play an otome.

43.) "Own Voices": Home by Nnedi Okorafor

3/5. The storytelling style was definitely not my style; while the first book was slow, too, it felt more purposeful. I found my attention wandering during this installment.

44.) During the season it's set in: Pumpkinheads by rainbow rowell

3/5. Cute art, but precious little substance.  The concept simply wasn't for me in the first place.

45.) LITRPG: My next life as a villainess: All routes lead to doom! by Hidaka nami

5/5. An absolute insta-fave! Charming art, endearing characters, an incredible premise, and so much sweet wholesome fluff it'll give you cavities.

46.) No chapters: The field guide to dumb birds of north america by matt kracht

3/5. It started out super strong, but the joke started to wear thin at a little past the halfway point.

47.) 2 books with the same title: Unfollow by Megan Phelps-Roger

4/5. A brave and enduring personal story of growing up in and eventually leaving the Westboro Baptist Church. Really called to me to act with grace and kindness even more in the future.

48.) 2 books with the same title: unfollow by rob williams and michael dowling

1/5. How many times do you think we can make Battle Royale again before someone notices

49.) That has inspired a common phrase or idiom: THe Outsiders by S.E. Hinton

4/5. Definitely good and deserves it's praise as something that pretty much revolutionized and created an entire demographic of literature.

50.) Set in an abbey, cloister, Monastery, convent, or vicarage: Murder at the vicarage by agatha christie

3/5. I just cannot. physically keep up with all of these characters or find the energy to read between the lines.

ok that's all i got, what did y'all read and like this year?  (oh god it’s gonna be 2020)

[marymccartneyphotos]

Mary McCartney Gets By with a Little Help From Her Dad

The Globe and Mail-- May, 3 2013

Mary McCartney’s life in photographs started when she was just an infant. That baby on the cover of Paul McCartney’s first eponymous solo record, released in 1970, is her, peeking out at the camera from inside the sheepskin coat of her famous father and Beatles co-founder. The photographer was her mother, Linda Eastman McCartney, who early on nurtured Mary, the first-born child of her union with the former Beatle, to share her love and passion for photography. Today an established artist in her own right, Mary McCartney has shot intimate portraits of some of the celebrities who have long orbited around the family of a Beatle: Chrissie Hynde of the Pretenders, Elvis Costello, Debbie Harry, Sgt. Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band artist Peter Blake, Marianne Faithfull and Vanessa Redrave to name a few. These portraits and others of contemporary celebrities such as Madonna, Kate Moss and Gwyneth Paltrow comprise the bulk of her 2010 book, Mary McCartney: From Where I Stand, now the focus of an exhibition opening at Izzy Gallery in Toronto next week. The range of black-and-white and colour images include behind-the-scenes portraits of dancers from the Royal Ballet and of her fashion designer sister Stella McCartney’s fashion shows. Mary McCartney discloses the point of view of an insider, allowing her viewers open access to the rarefied world of fame. But as she tells The Globe and Mail in a conversation touching on growing up on the road touring with her parents’ rock band Wings and her life as a mother of four sons, making that access look easy is all part of the art.

Let’s start by talking about creativity. Tell us about your process.

I think my process is thinking about the end images so I start with an atmosphere of a photograph that I want to get, then work back from there to attain that. I have an image in mind. For instance, when I did the ballet project, Off Pointe, with the Royal Ballet, an image came into my mind of a ballet dancer tending to her feet in her bathroom at the end of a really long evening of performance. And from there I worked back, and contacted the Royal Ballet and met the dancers. But it all came from an initial mental image.

You and I share a fascination with the backstage world of the ballet dancer. Why have you chosen to portray ballet dancers far from the footlights?

That’s a good question. I chose the ballet because I think it’s a private, very personal, almost all-consuming world. It’s quite intense. I’m not so physical. I’m more visual, and I would never be able to have the endurance and lifestyle that a ballet dancer has, so I think it’s so far from the stamina that I think I have myself. So, I find it fascinating that they can perform the way they can do, first of all. Then I met a ballet dancer years ago once. We were at a party in Soho and we were drinking together, and she was smoking, and a friend of mine was like, ‘You don’t smoke; you’re a ballet dancer,’ and from that, it kind of intrigued me more, and then meeting the dancers. They socialize together; they have relationships together and there’s like a whole other world of intensity and from that I was really quite intrigued about what goes on behind the scenes. And so I met some of the dancers, and they kind of let me into that world. So I think partly because I found it so intriguing because it was a whole lifestyle I didn’t know about, and secondly, it was to do with sort of gaining that trust, to be allowed into that world to shadow the dancers, and from there I really wanted to do it away from the stage and the rehearsal rooms as much as possible, mainly because that part has been already been captured really well, and I was more interested in their lives and relationships and what goes on away from the rehearsal room.

You have one of the dancers poised over a pool table.

Yes. That was fun. That was when they had done a performance and we all went out to dinner and a party and from there we went back to someone’s apartment and they ended up playing pool. But I just love the fact that you can tell she’s a ballet dancer by the way she’s draping herself across the table. It’s very much about their lifestyle. There’s another one where I stayed over with them at one of their homes, and in the morning one of the ballet dancers, her name is Sian [Murphy], wanted to make a cup of tea, and she’s standing with her feet in a ballet dancer’s position, but, you know, she’s just got her underwear on, and a towel wrapped around her head because she’s just washed her hair, and you can just tell she’s a ballet dancer even when she’s making a cup of tea.

I understand you are continuing to work with dancers for a new project. Can you tell us about that?

I’ve been working on my new book project, called Devoted, and it is carrying on from the dancers in that they have such devotion to their lifestyle and the commitment, the time commitment, everything that they put into their career. It kind of takes over their lives. And then you have the sacrifice, a certain amount, to live that life because it is a real passion. So I’m continuing with the dancers, and I am taking other subjects. I photographed a geisha, which also has that ritual and that dedication to learning the process. I am doing various other subjects based around that devotion and that commitment.

This behind-the-scenes point of view permeates all your work, even of celebrities. Why do prefer this approach?

I am quite intrigued by what goes on before the performance. I’ve always been curious. Like, if I watch a play or a dance recital or anything really, even if it’s a kids’ puppet show, I get really distracted thinking: Who is this person performing on the stage? How did they get there? What was their life like? How did they end up performing in this way? Even to the point of, What’s their dressing room like? And what’s their ritual before they come up on the stage? What do they eat? What time do they sleep until they don’t feel too tired? So you know, I get really distracted asking myself lots of questions. I really am quite fascinated by these people and their lives, these people’s personal stories, and I suppose it’s that privacy and that intimacy before the public display. So trying to get myself into these situations where I can kind of observe them in their more personal moments has always intrigued me.

But even when you are photographing people on the stage, like Bjork for instance, the approach appears shy and private. Why?

Hmmm. I think it sort of interests me more. It’s sort of looking at something from a different angle that isn’t the one that everyone sees. It’s the kind of thing, when I look at a photograph like that it makes me ask questions or want to know more about the story. Whereas if it’s more of a typical shot taken for the more normal kind of view point then maybe I’ll look over it a bit more quickly whereas I want to get something more arresting, to make people stop and make them look at it and wonder what the story is behind it, to make up their own story around it. I like images that make you question, make you wonder a little bit.

You got your first big start photographing the Blairs while Tony Blair was still in office as the British prime minister. Can you tell us about that experience?

Um, it was quite an interesting one. I started working as a photographer working in my mother’s photography archives, and helping her edit images, and through that Cherie Blair, we had donated one of mom’s photographs for a charity project they [the Blairs] were doing, and so we met though that, and then I just got a phone call one day from Fiona Miller, her adviser, saying can we meet somewhere to discus something privately, which was very intriguing. So, when we met she said, ‘Well you know, Cherie and Tony Blair would like you to take the first pictures of their baby because they are aware there will be a lot of public interest and they would like to have someone that they trust come and take the pictures in a relaxed environment and then release the pictures that way rather than have paparazzi stalking them that sort of thing.’ So they invited me in and it was very intriguing because it worked very much in my style in that I love to gain that trust of my subjects and go into quite personal situations and get portraits and photographs that way. [Those photographs] have an intensity about them. He was only about 36 hours old when I took those pictures, so there’s a tension in the air of a newborn, and just being in Downing Street, with all the press outside. It kind of had an excitement to it.

How else has your late mother, Linda McCartney, influenced you as a photographer?

I think that in her photographic style she would take pictures that looked really easy to take and really simple. She didn’t do a lot of big lights and fancy stuff around it. But she would get very intimate, relaxed photographs. She could get her subjects to really, really relax in front of her, and she used a lot of available light situations. So in a way the pictures look quite casual but they are capturing very important moments, so I think that has really influenced me, because that is something that I like to do.

We can’t leave Paul McCartney out of the equation. How has he influenced you as an artist?

He has influenced me in that he, as a child I remember he and my mom would sit together and he would edit my mom if mom was doing a book, and they would sit around with prints and he would help edit pictures of her and so he has a really good eye, and a really good opinion on things. So when I’ve done exhibitions and books, I get my edit together but then I meet up with him, you know for breakfast, and go through working prints and ask him his opinion. I think he’s got a good eye, and he’s always been interested in photography. And he’s had a lot of amazing photographers over the years take his picture, so I think he has a really good opinion. I ask his judgment still on his favourite shots, if I’ve got a shoot going on.

You grew up on the road while your parents had the rock band, Wings. Have you ever thought to rebel against all that anti-conformity that has surrounded you all your life as the daughter of a major rock star and icon?

No, I’ve never felt the need to rebel. I think that, there was a lot of time on the road growing up, and a lot of travelling, but I had my siblings with me so it felt quite normal. There was a lot of activity around, and mom and dad would, if we were somewhere for a while, rent a house rather than putting us in a hotel so it would have a kitchen and cooking and home living around it, still. Other than that, they were quite interesting, rounding experiences and also by the time I got to 8, 9, 10, they settled down, and stopped touring for a while. So it sort of was more those younger years where you’re still quite flexible. So when I got a bit older we did settle and I was at a school kind of normally and not moving around all the time. But I think, no, I haven’t rebelled against it. It’s made me enjoy travelling and seeing new things and I think maybe I’m quite adaptable to different situations because of it.

You dedicate your 2010 book to your family. How has your sister, Stella McCartney, influenced you?

She and I have worked on a few projects together. I worked on a campaign for her photography. But you know we are close and we hang out quite a lot so we bounce ideas off each other.

How about brother James?

He’s been quite a good subject. I’ve taken a lot of photographs of him over the years. I like taking pictures. I do commercial projects and I do more personal things during holiday times and so he’s quite fun, and quite quirky and I’ve done a nice range of pictures of him. He’s a great subject. He’s got a great sense of humour, and in the past he’s sort of performed well for me before the camera, so I’ve got a lot of nice photographs of him over the years but quite quirky, which I like, they make me smile.

Digital or darkroom?

A combination of the two. I do a lot of digital commercial work but my books and exhibitions and limited editions are generally on film. It depends. Depending on what the shoot is I kind of build the kit around that, so if I’m shooting and it’s just me and the camera on my own exploring then I generally use film, and if it’s more a shoot where I need a team, then I will shoot with digital because you can e-mail the edits and it’s much more practical, but my heart is still with film. That’s how I learned. A lot of the photographs that have inspired me are beautiful black and white, grainy prints, so I like that texture.

Do you like developing the pictures, then?

It’s more the film quality and the look of it and the actual shooting with film that I like. I’m not so into printing and that side of it. But with film comes uncertainty. Yes and you wait for the contact sheets and see what you’ve got. I like that. It’s a bit more magical to me. But you know digital, when you’ve got it set up properly, it’s pretty hard to tell the difference.

Your coming visit to Toronto: Is it your first time here?

I think it will be my first proper visit to Toronto. I’ve been before when dad played there. But I just came in for the evening and went to the show and then left so it’s my first time, yeah, it’s my second time.

What’s been your experience working with the Izzy Gallery?

They’ve been very encouraging. They’ve got a good eye and they’ve worked with my images, suggesting images that they like, so we’ve kind of worked together on the edit for this exhibition, and, um, they’ve been pretty easy and nice to work with.

How do you choose the galleries you work with?

I often work in the sense that I have a request. I was approached by the Izzy Gallery and then from there I do a bit of research on the gallery and then it works that way. They approached me and I knew some of the photographers who had worked with them before [Albert Watson and Ellen von Unwerth] and so I made the decision from there. I generally work with more specialist photographic galleries that specialize in limited editions. This interview has been edited and condensed.

[poemsforcowboys]

What a Feeling // Freddie Mercury

Chapter One  Chapter Two 

Pairing: Freddie Mercury and Katy Newton (OC)

Summary: Before she moved from London to New York at the age of thirteen, Katy Newton had always been friends with Brian May. He was the only one she knew who encouraged her creative side, especially her designs for fashion and makeup. So much so, that Katy is hired as Queen’s newest stylist. But what she doesn’t expect is her knew found friend, Freddie Mercury. Will their casual flirts lead to anything of substance? Or will their relationship just become another lost love as they both make their journey towards self acceptance.

Warnings: there will be smut eventually but not in this chapter, bisexuality (?), feels 

CHAPTER THREE 

“Newt?” Brian was proud of himself for coming up with the new nickname as he scanned the extensive menu of the small New York cafe he and his friend had met for breakfast in. It was adorable, with light yellow walls and peach undertones, they sat in comfy lime green large chairs, it was unlike any he was familiar with in England.

She looked up from her sketchbook and smiled, she rather liked that one.

“They don’t have tea here” he stated, a little flabbergasted, as he continued to search the menu in disbelief. Katy chuckled.

“Some places have it, Bri but some places don’t, it’s not as popular here as coffee” Katy used her now navy blue painted fingernail to direct his gaze to a large section of the menu, listing the different coffees served. He huffed and shook his head.

A short while later, they placed their orders and began to catch up. Katy showed him some of the designs she was working on, he had always encouraged her to make what she wanted, and soon the two were talking again like nothing had ever changed.

But things had changed. Things were constantly changing, Brian felt like every day was a new adventure, one that would take him farther from home. There was something that he saw in Katy,  it reminded him to take a break. That’s why he was ecstatic the entire time they were in that cafe, Katy just assumed it was because of the show and their reunion but she knew there was something else, she just didn’t want to push it.  

Finally, their tealess meal arrived and Brian knew it was time to “spilled the beans” (an American phrase he was extremely happy to have picked up from Jo).

“Katy” he took a cautious sip of his coffee and instead of her name, his funny reaction to its bitterness caused her to look up.

“Last night was fun, yeah?”  he asked, she smiled and nodded.

“Fun’s an understatement! Even when I fixed John’s pants” Brian just smiled, she had created the perfect way for him to tell her.

“Y’know, Debbie’s quit” he stated, taking another sip of the coffee, he didn’t like it but for some reason, he kinda liked it.

“Yeah, I heard Freddie screaming to your manager about it” she replied, not having the most sympathy in her voice. Debbie was the one who had originally sewn the pants John ripped last night and Katy could tell that she wasn’t the best at her job.

“Did ya also happen to hear what our manager said back to Freddie?” his smile grew larger every second. But Katy returned it with a confused look.

“No, I didn’t, what are you talkin-”

Brian interrupted her out of excitement.

“He saw what you were doin! Katy, he wanted me to ask ya if you were willin to come with us on our tour. Apparently Freddie talked you up” Brian was hesitant to relay the last part, but at the same time he was thankful that Freddie had helped to create an opportunity for Brian to see his friend maybe every day.

Katy’s eyes just widened, neither of the acts she had done last night were to insinuate this in any way, and she was in awe that their manager took notice to her. She was also a little confused. Freddie “talked her up?” What did that even mean? They had only met that night. She decided not to ask about it, she had a feeling that Brian wouldn’t be too keen on the idea of her becoming so interested in his cocky bandmate.

“I- I don’t know what to say, I mean, I’m-”

“Katy, we’d be paying you, you could show your parents that you can actually make a living off of what you want to do, not just that law shit” he egged her on. He had gotten his chance to do what he loved, and wanted nothing more than to let her have that same happiness.

Katy hadn’t thought about that. She felt her eyes beginning to well up, what if she actually showed them? Or, what if they never spoke to her again? In theory, her mother loved what Brian was doing, but would she let Katy bask in the same light? The proposition was overwhelming to her, and Brian got up to hug her, he didn’t care who was around.

“I mean, I don’t know Bri, I would be honored, but my mum, you know her” she hugged him back, her head only really reaching his mid chest.

“I know, but well um” there was a second piece of news that Brian had received since parting ways with Katy shortly after she had repaired John’s pants the night before.

“What is it?” Katy asked, it was now him who was struggling to speak, he didn’t know how she was going to react to what he was about to say.

“Your mum actually called me this morning” he started, and Katy groaned.

“She wanted to know if I wanted to come over for dinner tonight, and well, Freddie took the telephone from me and said he would love to. Your mum thought it was Roger who was speaking so she invited them all over too”

Katy stopped hugging him and just stared. You’ve got to be fucking kidding me. She thought. Brian with her family was one thing, but everyone else? This might even hurt her chances of being able to work with them on their American tour.

“Bri, I-”

“I know, but your mum is so excited, I never remember her actually being excited. Maybe you can bring it up to her tonight after she is so impressed by our manners” Katy couldn’t tell if that last part was sarcastic or not, she only perceived this as being able to go in one way: an absolute nightmare.

- 

Katy was just as nervous several hours later as she fixed her hair in the mirror. She hated the fact that she had to be more reserved around her parents, tying her dark hair into a neat low bun. She put on a black turtleneck with sleeves that ended just above her elbows and white shorts, it was summer after all. She still couldn’t believe she had agreed to this. If it wasn’t for the prospect of a new and fulfilling job possibly starting tomorrow, she would never have found herself in this situation, more worried than ever.

She made her way down the stairs, wanting to see how the cooking that her mother had insisted on doing was going. She ran into her little brother, who was trying to figure out how many people to set the table for. James was way younger than Katy and now thirteen, he wasn’t even born when they had made the move.

“I think there’ll be eight of us, let me help you with that” but before Katy could fully extend her arms to take some silverware, the doorbell rang. She froze. They were here already? She looked at the clock, it was her who was running late, not them, she had no idea how time had slipped away so quickly.

Katy rushed for the door, but her mother beat her to it “Kathryn, make sure the chicken doesn’t burn, please” she said, shooing both Katy and James off to the dining room before opening the door.

“Brian, dearie! Oh, you’ve gotten so big!” all four of them were standing there, Freddie even holding a bottle of wine, but Clara Newton ran straight to hug Brian. Even standing on her toes to kiss his cheek, he hugged her back, not as hard as she was holding him, and managed to make out a “thank you” through the suffocation.

Roger coughed. “Why did no one tell me Katy had a sister? Freddie did you call dibs on her too?” he winked at Mrs. Newton. No one was sure how serious Roger was being, but it caused both Freddie’s face and Clara’s to turn bright red. Roger was an asshole, both Brian and Freddie could agree on that at the moment. Freddie hadn’t even told Roger anything and he was already making things worse.

Mrs. Newton’s eyes squinted at the last part Roger said, turning to Freddie and looking him up and down, causing him to become extremely uncomfortable and self conscious about the outfit he was wearing. Brian had told him to dress “appropriately” so he had chosen one of his “safer” outfits, a white button up (although he hadn’t exactly buttoned it up), a red velvet jacket, and very subtle eyeliner, more for him than anyone else. He extended the wine bottle and she took it, smiling politely but still cautious.

“I’m actually Kathryn’s mother, but you’re sweet, come in and make yourself comfortable” she laughed to Roger, taking the wine bottle but deciding not to comment on Freddie.

The Newton home was a modest one, decorated in earth tones and covered in art and houseplants. They’re small black lab, Rocky, was only a puppy and stumbled into the room, making his way towards Brian to lick his boots. Although it wasn’t the same dog that Katy had had in England, it was sweet that he approached Brian with the same curiosity Katy’s old dog Finn did, and Brian received this curiosity with the same slight wave of anxiety.

Freddie looked around the room, Katy was nowhere in sight. He was really hoping tonight would go well and she would be able to join them on their tour. He had only spoken to her for a little bit, but the conversations they had had were fascinating to him, and he couldn’t stop thinking about them, to be honest.

Instead, a young boy with curly dark brown hair entered the room, chasing after the small dog, who was now nipping at the hem of Roger’s bootcut jeans.

“Sorry ma’am, he’s only a couple months old” James apologized, taking the small dog into his arms. Freddie burst out laughing and came over to pet the small thing, gaining a new respect for who he suspected was Katy’s brother.

Roger huffed. “Why do people ALWAYS do that” he stated, punching Freddie in the arm lightly for laughing.

“Have- have you looked at yourself, Rog?” John was also laughing. Roger hit him too.

“Hey guys! Bri, it’s been like forever since I’ve seen you” Katy let out a chuckle as she walked out of the kitchen, James mentally thanked her for ending the conversation he had accidentally started.

“That it has” Brian hugged her again anyway. Freddie wanted to say something, but he wasn’t quite sure what. There weren’t many moments he felt like he was at a loss for words, but the way that Katy looked tonight made him feel like he had forgotten how to speak. Her outfit really was quite simple and modest but for some reason he couldn’t stop admiring her legs and curves. John lightly kicked his foot and muttered something like

“Stop staring, Freddie.” Freddie cleared his throat, turning his fascination to the ceiling, he had no idea what John could possibly be talking about, and the light fixtures suddenly were very interesting.

Katy’s mother entered the room again, happy to see that she was talking to Brian. She clapped her hands, instantly gaining the attention of everyone, Freddie made note of the tactic.

“It’s time for dinner, if you could make your way this way” “Lovely home, Mrs. Newton, truly”

“Why thank you, John” he was always the best at impressing parents, Brian came in a close second, and whether Roger or Freddie was last was a heavily argued debate.

They took their seats at the small table, it was kind of a tight squeeze as Brian was arguably twice the size as Katy, his knees hitting the top of the table every time he laughed. During their meal, James asked John what his favorite lyric he had ever written was, and each of them took their turn replying with heartfelt responses, taking a few moments to really think about it.

“I was really proud of-”

“You call me sweet like I’m some kind of cheese? That one truly moved me Bri, I swear it did” Katy smirked, interrupting him and causing him to scowl.

“Ha!” Freddie laughed before quickly closing his mouth “I thought I was the only one who loved it, it truly was your best work, dear” he and Katy shared the laugh, looking into each other’s brown eyes, eventually everyone else joined in when they realized the sarcasm radiating from the two. Brian just glared.

Dinner was interesting to say the least, the red wine that Freddie had so graciously brought made the conversations flow a little easier for everyone, a lot easier for Freddie.

“And so, what I’m saying is,” Freddie took another long sip, he was sitting next to a very confused James, who was also trying to avoid Roger’s eye contact, they were sitting right across from each other. Freddie was in the middle of telling a story, one that no one was quite sure what direction it was headed in.

Katy, nervous, continuously glanced over at her mother. She seemed to be enjoying herself, thank god, even though Roger making the usual flirty chit chat that he was best at. She only hoped that the happiness would continue into the night, long enough for her to ask about the tour.  

“Brian was going to be an astrophysicist, Roger a bloody dentist! But now? They’re part of a band with a chart topping song! Not to mention enough pounds to support our families, and if that” he took one more sip, James couldn’t stop staring at the singer’s heels. Katy made eye contact with Brian, hoping Freddie would stop.  

“doesn’t tell you to follow your dreams, I don’t know WHAT does” he smiled, winking at Katy, her mother choked on her water.

Katy froze, why would he say something like that.  

“Freddie, can we PLEASE just eat our food” said John.

“Well” her mother cleared her throat. “I am glad that your talents have taken you that far. You should consider yourself lucky” she said coldly. James stared at his plate, now too nervous to admire Freddie’s shoes any longer.  

“Clara, this has been a wonderful meal, thank you” Brian said suddenly, he couldn’t have been more angry at Freddie.

“It really has, the potatoes were delicious” John added in, also aware of the situation. Freddie didn’t regret what he had said. He knew Katy was talented and that that talent would take her places too, he didn’t deny she would prove her mother wrong one way or another.

“I wish we could stay for longer, but I think we must be going, we’ve got interviews early tomorrow morning, but Clara, you are truly a gem” even Roger piped in, his addition making her crack a smile. Katy had to admit she appreciated that.

“Alright, well thank you all for coming, it’s been a pleasure” “The pleasure is all mine Mrs. Newton.” Roger kissed her on the cheek.

One by one, they cleaned their plates and helped Katy and James clear the table. Although Freddie didn’t regret what he had said, he still tried to be extra polite to everyone since that remark.

Eventually they filed out, each saying their goodbyes to Katy’s mum and younger brother.

“Goodnight, Katy I hope it goes well, best of luck to you and hopefully I will see you tomorrow” Freddie shyly hugged Katy, this time being aware of how loud he was talking and making sure her mother couldn’t hear it.

“Thank you” she smiled, hugging him back, a little surprised at his actions. She hoped she would see him again too.

Eventually the house was quiet again, except for some faint barks from Rocky, and James, Katy, and her mother were left sitting alone on their brown leather couch.

“So Mum” Katy started, more nervous than ever.

“Are you dating Brian?” her mother asked excitedly, James also looked at her a little expectantly.

“No! Mum for the last time, I will never be dating Brian, that will never be what one of these conversations is about” Katy laughed nervously.

“One of these conversations, Kathryn is everything okay?” her mother asked, furrowing her eyebrows and starting to look worried.

“Yeah, mum, everything is great actually but um, you know how Freddie talked about following your dreams and actually becoming successful?”

Now, her mother’s eyebrow was raised in confusion. “I do remember that, yes” her voice grew a little colder.  

“Well, Queen’s manager has asked me to join them on their American tour. I’d be their designer and stylist, Mum, I’d be getting paid and working normal hours, and I would be doing what I loved” Katy was hesitant to start, but with every word she became more confident and sure of herself. James let out a squeal, the whole night not wanting to admit how much he had enjoyed being around the band. Her mother just stared at her, unsure of what exactly to say.

“They really asked you this?” Katy nodded, trying to search her mother’s eyes for any hint as to what she was going to say, but all she saw was brown.

“They did Mum, they’re a band in extremely high demand and they asked me, their tour manager Mum, not even Brian, asked me to work for them”

“Kathryn I,”

“Oh come on Mum she’s been waiting for this for ages” James interrupted her, his help was necessary as he always brought their mother back to reality.

“Well” she started sternly “as long as they will be paying you, and as long as you keep yourself out of trouble, and in America, I don’t see why not. You’d just better be sleeping in your own room every night unless it’s Brian’s and make sure he protects you I don’t want my Kathryn getting swept up in-” she was interrupted again, by Katy’s tight hug.

“Mum I promise I won’t let you down, I will write and call to you and James every week I promise I promise I promise” Katy could not stop smiling, she couldn’t really believe what was happening. She was actually doing it. She was going on tour with her best friend and some already amazing people, doing what she loved most in the world.

Katy could cry, and she did. Her brown eyes welled up and she thanked her mother again before running upstairs to call Brian, James quickly running after her.

“Katy” he hugged her “if you’re gonna call Brian, I think he’s still outside” he said laughing. They walked over to her window, to see all four members of Queen still at her house, sitting on the hood of their car. Freddie had asked for a cigarette break before they left, but at the same time he was hoping for one more chance to see Katy. He got that chance.

She smiled and excitedly opened her window, scaring John and causing him to stand up from his seat and look around, he spotted Katy and waved.

“Guess who’s your new stylist?” she called out, James giggled from behind her.

They all started to cheer.  

CHAPTER FOUR 

AN: thank you guys for reading! so, these updates came out fairly quickly but chapter four might not be done for another two or three days. I would expect something definitely by Tuesday night :) 

tagged: @come-with-me-and-imagine, @mimisfangirlfantasy, @runawayxwithme, @feministsatanworshipper, @axxl-rose  

[sassyshoulderangel319]

Notes: This isn’t part of my Sanders Sides merfolk story that I’ve been writing. TBH I’m not 100% sure where this came from. @puns-and-patton @eequalsmcscared (Tagging you two because you’re my friends!)

“OH WHAT A BEAUTIFUL MOOOOORRRNNNING! OH WHAT A BEAUTIFUL DAAAAAAY! I’VE GOT A BEAUTIFUL FEEEEEEEEEELING! EVERYTHING’S GOin’ my waaay!” Roman sang as he and his roommates piled their beach stuff out of Logan’s car and onto the asphalt in the parking lot so they could take it down to the beach.

Virgil rolled his eyes. The only compromise for the warm weather that he’d made was a purple T-shirt under his hoodie rather than the thick, dark, long-sleeved shirt he usually wore and a pair of violet plaid swim trunks with black sandals. His hood was still up over his purple hair. “The morning isn’t that gorgeous, Your Highness,” he snarked sarcastically, glancing up. “The clouds are gonna roll in soon and we might have to evacuate early---”

“Oh hush, Debbie Downer,” Roman retorted.

“Isn’t it Danny Downer for a boy?” Patton asked, hefting three beach towels, two huge umbrellas, a bag with their clothes, and a cooler into his arms and hands.

Logan shrugged, adjusted his sunglasses over his normal glasses, and picked up another cooler and his own towel. “Does it matter? Let’s go,” he said.

The four of them picked their way down the sandy, grass-lined path to the beach. It was a secluded spot that people rarely went to. It wasn’t an uncommon belief in their town that this stretch of sand was haunted. Older people would swear up and down that on some nights they could hear the most ethereal singing coming from this particular beach. Virgil loved listening to the tales, even if he didn’t believe any of them. Patton did too, mostly for the sake of a fun story. In fact, Logan was the only one who listened with irritation. He didn’t believe in ghosts---much less ones that sang.

Logan believed the rumor that the beach was haunted came from the fact that the Sirens’ Shoals was nearby---a shallow shoal that had wrecked many speedboats when the drivers weren’t careful. Nicknamed thus because sirens used to wreck ships and drown sailors.

When the four of them reached the beach, it was as empty as they expected. No one else ever came here. But the young men didn’t mind. They liked the privacy. They could be as loud as they wanted and no one could bother them.

They reached a spot near the rocks on the beach and started to set up. Patton put up umbrellas and Logan spread out towels. Roman slathered everyone in sunscreen---especially Virgil and Logan because they burned easily---while singing Broadway songs.

Patton was enjoying Roman’s performance. Virgil wasn’t. He put his earbuds in his ears and lounged back on one of the folding loungers they’d brought.

Though Roman’s singing was loud enough to be heard through the earbuds.

After a few minutes, Virgil rolled his eyes and got out of the chair, deciding to walk along the beach to the edge where the hill started again.

He stooped every so often to pick up broken pieces of seashells. The broken ones were his favorite. Reminders that not everything in life had to be perfect to be beautiful.

Virgil stopped walking as a monster wave washed up on shore and quickly receded. He could hear his roommates crying out in surprise and scrambling to get their gear out of reach. “The highest point of high tide is not supposed to be for another three hours!” Logan shouted.

Virgil didn’t even turn around to look at them.

He was too fascinated by what the wave left behind---more than wet sand.

A person with long hair flowing down to their hips. Though their hips and legs were buried under a layer of sopping wet sand. “Uh, pardon me, uh...” Sir? Miss? Was there a polite gender-neutral honorific that he was unaware of? Captain? Your Highness? “Pardon me? Are you alright?” he finished, deciding to forego the honorific altogether.

No response.

Virgil took a cautious step closer. The person was face-down so everything was hidden. Their face, their mouth---he hoped they could breathe---and anything that would indicate whether or not they were even alive.

Were they dead? Was that common? Was that why this place was thought to be haunted? Dead bodies washing up on the shore? How grim. He kinda enjoyed the thought. Another careful step towards the person. He should probably have called out for Patton and the others...

“Hello?” he pressed quietly.

The person sat up with a deep gasp, eyes wild and mouth open wide. They were covered in sand and panting. They seemed to present femininely, but Virgil decided not to preemptively assume anything.

They stared at him for several moments, still panting, as something dawned in their---remarkably dark---eyes. Which flicked up and down Virgil. Then focused on his legs.

Then another gasp. The newcomer scrambled toward the sea with their arms. Virgil noticed the legs dragging through the sand, still buried under a layer so he couldn’t see them well. Virgil didn’t even know what to do so he just stood, rooted to the spot, and watched them try to make it back into the water. The monster wave had washed them up pretty far though.

The person stopped. There was a moment of stillness. They slowly sagged back down onto the sand.

Virgil heard them crying.

He approached again---but only a few steps. “It’s alright. I’m not going to hurt you,” he said. “What’s wrong?”

Those dark eyes turned back to look at him. The crying continued.

Okaaay... other people crying was really out of Virgil’s comfort zone. He really needed to call for Patton...

No need.

“Great Odin’s eyepatch!” Roman exclaimed from two feet behind Virgil’s left ear. He jumped and smacked his boisterous roommate’s arm. “Patton! Get over here!”

Running in sand was difficult but Patton managed to reach them in good time. “Oh sweetie!” he whispered, looking heartbroken that this person, half-buried in wet sand, was weeping. “It’s alright. We’re not going to hurt you. What’s wrong?”

The person hiccuped. “I... I can never go home,” they murmured quietly.

“Aw. Why not?” Patton pressed, approaching gently, hands out to show he meant no harm. He crouched next to them.

They threw their arms around Patton. “I lost my tail! And now I can never go home!”

Huh?

Virgil scrunched his eyebrows. “Your tail?”

The person nodded and wiggled their hips. The wet sand slid off their lower half---

To reveal a scaly fish tail. Long and elegant. Shimmering turquoise in the sunlight with a hint of silver on the edges. The fluke was wide and gracefully draped over the sand.

“By Persephone! You’re a mermaid!” Roman gasped. He caught himself. “I mean---I didn’t mean to presume. What I meant was---you’re a merperson. A member of the merfolk, if you will---”

The newcomer waved their hand dismissively. “Don’t hurt yourself. Mermaid is fine. I’m a girl,” she said.

Patton kept his hand on her shoulder. “Doesn’t look like you lost it to me,” he said comfortingly. “How come you can’t go home?”

She sniffed and wiped her nose. “I got caught in a fishing net. Pulled into a fishing boat. Once I was out of the water, my tail turned into legs.” As she spoke, a shimmer that resembled heat off a hot road passed over her long tail, revealing a pair of short, thin legs and a skirt of scales. “In my pod, if we lose our tail to legs for even a moment we are no longer welcome home.”

“How come?” Patton asked gently.

The mermaid girl’s eyes hardened. “Because humans are a disease to the planet and it’s a disgrace to walk among them.”

Roman made a noise that sounded what, “???” felt like.

Virgil grunted, arms folded over his ribs.

The girl broke down again. “And now I have to walk among them for the rest of my life or return to the ocean podless!” She buried her face in her hands and cried even harder. “Merfolk can’t survive without a pod. Not even me.”

Virgil crouched in front of her, relating to that sentiment. Much as his roommates got on his nerves at times, he didn’t know where he’d be without them. Certainly in a less-happy place than he was currently in.

Patton and Roman looked thoughtful for a moment.

And then Logan finally joined the party. “What’s all the hullabaloo abou---oh.” He stared at the girl. “Where... did you come from?” he asked.

“That big wave washed her up,” Virgil supplied.

“Ah. I see.”

Another wave washed up on the sand, Roman danced out of the way but Patton let it wash right over his lower body so the mermaid girl could continue to hold onto him. The wave hung on the sand for a moment and then receded back to the sea. Clumps of wet sand slid off the girl’s tail---which had reformed with the water.

Logan stared at her tail. “That’s not... that’s not possible!”

“Don’t be such a stick in the mud,” Virgil muttered. “It’s literally right in front of your eyes.”

“But Virgil---mermaids aren’t real.”

“We are too,” the girl retorted, getting over her sorrow for a moment to drown it in sass. “We just don’t like humans so we don’t contact them.” She gave him a sarcastic grin.

“Hey, we never caught your name,” Patton pointed out.

The girl bit her lower lip. “It’s, uh, it’s kinda hard to say in English. Hmm. Uh... you can call me... Aaralyn,” she said.

“Aaralyn. How about you come home with us for a couple days?” Patton suggested. “We’ll help you figure everything out.”

“Uh... why?” Logan put in.

“We’ll explain in a minute,” Virgil said. He turned his attention back to Aaralyn. “Yeah kid. We’re pretty chill. We can give you a couple pointers on human life.”

She shook her head. “I really couldn’t ask you---we’re practically strangers---”

“That’s okay. You need help,” Patton pressed.

“Not to mention you’re a mermaid,” Roman added, looking awestruck.

“Which is not the point,” Patton chastised.

“Nah. Just a bonus,” Virgil put in, arms still folded over his chest.

“How about this, kiddo. We came to the beach to play and hang out. How about you stay with us till it’s time for us to go home and then make your decision?”

Aaralyn nodded. “I can do that,” she said.

Patton beamed. “Wonderful!”

Virgil watched Patton and Roman have a water fight in the waves with a disinterested expression on his face. Logan was reading a book on his foldable lounge chair. When Virgil glanced at said book, he expected it to maybe be a mystery novel---Logan’s favorite type of novel to read. Nope. Logan was legitimately sitting on a lounge chair reading a chemistry textbook.

“Didn’t you graduate college, like, six years ago?” Virgil asked.

“Yes,” Logan said blandly.

“So how come the textbook?”

“It’s fascinating.”

Virgil blinked. “Right,” he said.

“What’s a textbook?” Aaralyn asked from where she had quietly been sculpting the sand into a coral reef.

“It’s a type of book meant to teach,” Logan said. “Most often used for school.”

“Correction: only used for school by everyone except you,” Virgil joked. “You’re the only person I know who reads textbooks for enjoyment.” Logan shrugged and turned his page, pushing his glasses up his nose.

“PATTON!” Roman shouted. “PATTON THAT’S A RIP!”

The three heads of those on the beach whirled to see Patton fighting against a current, struggling to make it back to shore.

Aaralyn sprung to her feet and bolted into the waves. Virgil jumped up as well and ran to the edge, only able to watch as she dove in with perfect diving form. After a moment the fluke of her tail smacked the top of the water as it disappeared under.

There were several tense moments of silence while Patton fought the riptide before Aaralyn’s head appeared behind him. She wrapped one arm around his chest and pulled him onto his back. Roman, Logan, and Virgil watched tensely as she gently pulled him out of the riptide, off to the side, and then back to the beach. Patton washed up gracelessly, coughing and crawling onto dry sand on all fours.

Aaralyn washed up looking even worse, tail flapping uselessly in water too shallow to swim in and hair hanging in sopped clumps on either side of her face. Both of them were panting, sagged in the sand and not getting up.

Patton regained his feet first and went over to Aaralyn, offering her his hand. She took it and let him help her back to her face once her tail vanished.

Virgil would never tell Roman, but Patton was the strongest of the four roommates. Patton liked going to the gym and working out so he was strong enough to take care of his friends---and give the absolute best hugs.

One of which he immediately bestowed upon Aaralyn. He wrapped her up in a powerful hug. “You saved me,” he whispered.

Virgil ran and wrapped his arms around both of them. Aaralyn flinched but didn’t retreat.

Roman trudged out of the sea and he joined the group hug. Logan hung back, not particularly fond of physical affection.

“Thank you, Aaralyn,” Virgil said quietly.

She nodded. “Of course,” she replied.

“Are you going to let us help you learn to be human now?” Patton asked. “Come stay with us so we---well, I---can repay you?”

Aaralyn sighed. “You owe me nothing, Patton,” she said.

“Yes I do.”

“We all do. Patton is the heart of our little... band. We’d be lost without him,” Virgil said.

Aaralyn “Hmm”ed and rocked back and forth in the sand. “Oh. Well... alright,” she agreed. “Just for a little while.”

Patton beamed. “Yay! This’ll be fun!”

[alexsbrain]

Ocean’s 8

    The other night my brother and I went to the Carlton in Toronto to catch Ocean’s 8. I had stayed away from the film for a few weeks, I’d caught a few review headlines since it opened, dud, fizzled out, and franchise fatigue had cropped up a few times. When I first saw the publicity still last year, of all the women on the subway, I was amazed that a bunch of my favourite actresses, comedians, and pop singer (Rhianna) were all doing a film together and I put it on my list. I was pleasantly surprised by Ocean’s’8, it was a lot quirkier and funnier than I thought it would be, and occasionally I had to wipe away a tear from laughing.

Early publicity still

    The film follows the standard heist format pioneered by post war noir filmmakers. The star, Sandra Bullock, plays Debbie Ocean (Danny Ocean’s sister), and after hatching a scheme in prison for, “five years, eight months, and twelve days,” is released and has to put together a crack-pot team in order to steal a Cartier necklace worth over a hundred-million dollars. There are the typical vignettes of Ocean assembling her team, there’s her former partner turned nightclub owner (Cate Blanchette), the hacker 9-ball (Rihanna), a kleptomaniacal fence (Sarah Paulson), the jewelry expert (Mandy Kaling), the down and out fashion designer (Helena Bonham Carter), and the street wise pick pocket (Awkwafina). Together they execute Ocean’s daring plan to steal the necklace at the Met Gala. There are a few twists and turns in the plot which brings in an insurance agent from England, played by James Corden, to find the jewels. The audience is brought into the action through a series of well timed gags and hair-raising moments of suspense.

Hathaway and Bonham Carter at the Met Gala

    I’m a huge fan of heist films, there’s something about the sub-genre that appeals to me. Going all the way back to the Noir heists The Asphalt Jungle, and the French film Rafifi, I’m a sucker for a group of criminals trying to make one last big score. I wasn’t however a huge fan of the original Ocean movies, nor of the Soderbergh reboot. Which is why I was pleasantly surprised that this installment was so good and incredibly funny. It felt like I was watching an old comedy with Carol Lombard or Rosalind Russell, the comedic power of some of these actresses shines through in almost every scene. Helena Bonham Carter has some of the best reactions I’ve seen in years, her subtle head and eye movements executed just at the right time cracked me up, she wears a puzzled look on her face for most of the film which is incredibly endearing. Bonham Carter, being the veteran English actor of the bunch, even knows how to get all the mileage out of a costume during the Met gala, as she moves about in a bizarre outfit in such a way that makes it hilarious. She’s even poking fun at herself as she has been known for some odd fashion choices over the years at red carpet events. Sarah Paulson is very reserved but incredibly funny, her character, a waspy housewife, always seems to be on the brink of loosing her cool façade (she never does), and it’s fascinating to watch her play a mother role in a heist film. Some of her jokes were visual gags that were set up beautifully. The young Awkwafina gets most of the laughs as the street wise hustler, her role had the most potential for comedy, and she relishes every single moment she is on screen. She knows exactly when to hold a joke, letting in linger in the air, something most comedians don’t understand today. It’s not that you have to be funny all the time, it’s that you have to understand the rhythm of a joke. There’s a touch of Leslie Neilson or Bea Arthur in her comedic pauses.

Awkwafina as Constance shines

     Anne Hathaway steals some of the show as the vapid gum chewing movie star Daphne Kluger. Her timing is incredibly precise, she uses her gum chewing and big beautiful eyes to really sell her jokes, chewing on her pauses and delivering her lines with surgical precision. I think Hathaway needs to do more comedy outside of the schlocky rom-com type of humour that is ill fitting for her and reboot some the old Carol Lombard type plots that are entirely missing from cinema today.

    What was surprisingly nice was that the two headliners, Sandra Bullock and Cate Blanchette, never once took the spotlight away from someone else. They played their roles effectively and knew how to share the stage with the supporting cast allowing each of the others to grab some laughs and shine in their roles. If anything, the film was missing one good fight between Bullock and Blanchette. It would have been nice to add just a little tension between the two characters early on in the film, the should we do this scene was flat and self aggrandizing in their sisterly bond.

    Ocean’s 8 was co-written and directed by Gary Ross who’s resume includes Big, Pleasantville, and Mr. Baseball (one of my favorite cinematic guilty pleasures). He knows exactly how to set up a joke or a gag and executes it beautifully. What I found interesting is that most of the audience didn’t laugh at some of the funniest moments in the film. It seemed my brother and I, and a group of friends behind us, were the only ones who got the subtle jokes. I think one of the problems is that audiences today aren’t used to the subtly of reactions and visual gags. My favourite moment in the film is when Sarah Paulson’s character is introduced. She is living in the idyll of suburban America and making a healthy green smoothie when Debbie Ocean calls her, her son playing in the background. Answering the phone, she says, “Buddy do you want to stop that,” the threat is implied. Debbie tells her she’s in her garage and when Paulson walks into her garage there are boxes and boxes of stolen goods. It’s such a wonderful joke, that here in this perfect suburban house lies a kleptomaniacal fence. When Debbie asks her what she tells her husband about all the stolen goods Paulson replies dryly and at just the right moment, “eBay,” I couldn’t help but crack up at her delivery.

The perfect life, the perfect house, a life of crime

    The other problem plaguing the film is it’s underwhelmingly simplistic visual style. The camera moves and cuts competently enough, but the whole style is reminiscent of a de-contrasted Instagram photo or a mediocre Tumblr mood board. It’s a problem shared with a lot of commercial films these days, lackluster shadow-less vistas of muted colours that lacks any texture or depth. One thing that made last years The Florida Project so appealing was its rich palette and crisp composition, great care was taken at figuring out the mise-en-scène. It’s disappointing that the Ocean’s films, being reboots of the iconic 60’s jet set era, don’t devote more effort to their visual look. There was one sequence in a post-modern airport for a fashion show, and the occasional horizontal venetian blind wipe, but aside from that, the film looks like some washed out mediocre miniseries on the FX channel.

Strong composition, but the lackluster, and washed-out lighting renders the style bland

    Ocean’s 8 isn’t pretentious or hokey, it’s just an all female version of a heist film with some incredibly talented actresses. Checking over the box office receipts, the film is doing incredibly well this summer, and along with the Black Panther, is proving to the Hollywood establishment that you can deliver a great product with an all female cast, or a cast of people of colour, or on queer themes, and still turn a tidy sum. People want to watch a good product and they want to see themselves in the characters on the screen. Aside from a few missed opportunities to set this film apart from its predecessors, it’s a fun diversion this summer. If you’re a fan of good comedic pacing, or of any of the actresses, it’s worth the price of admission.

[dreamylyfe-x]

Would you describe Mickey as a full blown situational alcoholic or just someone who did some hard drinking during an incredibly low point in his life?

Oh. THAT'S interesting. Hmm. Well. Let me think on it.

They all drink a lot. Certainly far more than I would ever consider normal. Far more than they should. But I kinda feel like Mickey is mostly responding to trauma and tragedy in the way he's been taught that it's ok to respond to trauma and tragedy. Something awful happens to him, the correct masculine response is to get drunk. The way people get drunk at wakes. He's not supposed to feel the feelings or process what happened to him. He's supposed to get drunk and then feel the feelings.

Off hand, I can think of five times when I feel like Mickey is drunk. Like it's being indicated to us that he's over his limit. The first is fun drunk. He's out of juvie. He's hanging out with the boy he likes. They're getting drunk, fucking around and talking about calculus summer school. Mickey's got this lovely buzzy, slurry energy around him when he talks about pissing on first base. That time it's like... getting drunk with someone as a way to bond.

Then we have the two times we see him after 3x06. He's drinking a lot. Hard liquor. The guns suggest he's feeling particularly self-destructive. This is probably the time I find his drinking the most dangerous, and when it feels most like situational alcohol abuse. But I still feel like he's in control of it. He's doing it so that he won't do other things. And he's doing it to work through some of his anger and pain. This whole period is marked by how completely impossible it is for Mickey to even talk about what's happening to him in a real way. But drunk, he can express rage that I don't think he would otherwise.

Then there's the drinking in season four. I do feel like the time we see him drunk off his ass after seeing Ian in the hospital, that's a wake. That's Mickey in deep mourning because he's really understanding that his life with Ian is going to change in some ways that he can't anticipate. And in a weird way, I wonder if that was good for him. If taking that time to just grieve helped him get to where he needed to be to support Ian. I find it fascinating that, once he's truly inebriated, he goes looking for company. I can see a scenario where he finds someone -- a sibling or just some other random person -- and sits down and just pours his heart out. I think it's a very really think for Mickey, at that point, that he needs to be really drunk to talk about his feelings. At least those feelings.

Then there's the determined "angry drinking" from the next episode. Which turns off like a switch once Debbie calls him out. Informed that this is unlikely to work, Mickey sobers up to a degree that makes me wonder how drunk he ever was. Probably some? But nothing like the night he ends up on the floor holding Ian's uniform.

I think some people might describe Love Is a Battlefield as drunk Mickey, but I think that's mostly drunk Ian. Mickey's had a few, but he's mostly just drowning in the relief of having fun with his super-drunk-off-one-beer boyfriend. It wouldn't surprise me if he's had, like, two beers tops.

All of these are incidents happen in the first five seasons and we don't really see him hardcore drunk after that. But we do see some shitty things happen to him. And the episode where we see him dealing with the biggest blow, he's sitting on the bed sobbing. And then he's talking to Ian about his memories and his feelings. He's letting his husband put an arm around him at his father's grave. And I don't think that shift happens because Mickey gets therapy and figures out different coping strategies so much as he just... ceases to feel like he has to be drunk to express his feelings.

He still drinks beer like water, which they all do, and that's problem drinking. But I think Mickey's binge drinking tends to be a choice he makes, as much as it's also a coping mechanism. It's not the ONLY choice he can make and as the show goes on we see him abandon it.

Though I imagine he got pretty drunk his first night in Mexico.

[itshollandsgirl]

You Had Me At Hello

Anon asked: I'm sorry I'm such a big fan of you...but can you make a fanfic about you and Colby brock are in highschool and Colby is the popular kid and you "can she be named bella? thank you <33 its fine if she cant be lmao" is not that known she gets bullied by Colby's girlfriend (pick a name it don't matter) but then one day bella bumps into Colby and the rest is history (there can be smut ;>) A/N: I don’t do smut, especially for Colby because I have the ongoing fear one day he’ll see this and it’ll be featured in a youtube video and I’ll have a cringe attack. Girl’s name is Y/N cause I like giving everyone a chance to be in their own imagination with Colby.

Y/N’s POV

“Are you ready for your first day of school, kiddo?” My dad asked. “No, not really but you’re still gonna take me there regardless of what I say.” I replied. “Don’t be such a Debby Downer, who knows maybe it’ll be different this time.” Mom said. “That’s what you always say.” I mumbled.

I see her ready to reply, but instead closes her mouth probably not wanting to provoke me anymore. This is my third school in two years, each time I had one or no friends. I begged my parents to home school me, but they said I wouldn’t get the “fun” high school experience they did. Honestly I don’t want that, I rather stay in my room listening to music and working on my art. We arrived to my new hell hole here in Kansas, Blue Valley High (A/N: Such a genaric name I know, but it’s actually the name of his high school). 

“Have fun, dear.” Mom said. “Make friends, please.” Dad lowkey begged.

I waved them off to leave and made my way through the court yard. Walking up the steps, ignoring the many stares from students, as I go to the office. Building structure wise, it was nice. Walking into the office, I receive my schedule and locker information. Going back into the war zone, aka the hallway, I somehow by the grace of God found my locker. Cliques were all over the place and of course they had to be close to my locker. Next to my locker were a group of band kids, how do I know they’re in band? They all have an instrument or instrument case in their hands. A couple of guys and girls leaning against the lockers. I made eye contact with one of them, he had bright captivating blue eyes. I had this odd feeling in my chest when I saw him, I don’t know what it is. I’ve never felt this before, what is this? Breaking the eye contact, I fidgeted trying to open this locker. I did a quick glance at him and he’s still looking. Going back trying to undo this lock, I began to get frustrated. Damn this stupid lock. All of a sudden another pair of hands came on top of mine and a sudden feel of heat came to my side.

“Here, let me help.” A deep male voice said.

Without taking my eyes off the lock, I knew it was the boy with the blue eyes. I moved to the side giving him room and also because he was too close to me.

“What’s your combo?” He asked. “23-1-19″ I said quietly.

Why have I lost my voice? Why do I feel nervous?

“You have to turn it twice to the left, once to the right and wait for the click. Just know your first two numbers, the third one is the click to know it’s unlocked. There you go.” He said opening my locker.

Finally looking at him, he had a smile on his face and his eyes sparkling. Never before have I been so fascinated by someone’s eyes, but his were just so mesmorizing. 

“T-thanks.” I said attempting to smile. “My name’s Colby, Colby Brock.” He introduced himself with his hand out. “Y/N Y/L/N.” I said taking his hands. “Nice to meet you, Y/N. Looks like we’ll be locker buddies. This is mine next to yours.” He said patting the metal box. “Cool.” I said. “You’re a shy one, I can tell. But don’t worry, over time I know you’ll open up.” Colby smiled.

His happiness is rubbing off on me already, I gave him a genuine smile and nodded. 

“What homeroom are you in? Can I see your schedule?” He asked.

Handing him my schedule, I put my things away locking my locker and turning to him again.

“Looks like you’re in luck, we have all the same classes together. Except for one, I’m in band and you’re in Honours Painting. That’s cool, so you must be really good at drawing.” Colby said. “Y-yeah, I am.” I said putting my hair behind my ear. “What do you draw?” “What I like, what I feel, what I find interesting. My drawing is subjective, it can with one idea but then turns into this whole other idea.” I explained happily. “That’s cool, you’ll have to show me sometime.” He smiled. “S-sure.” I said a heat creeping up to my face.

We stood there for a good second kinda just staring at each other. What is he looking at? Is there something on my face? Does my breathe smell bad? Is there food on my teeth? Why do I care so much all of a sudden?

“Colby! There you are, I was looking for you!” I heard a voice boom in my ear.

All of a sudden a girl with brunette hair and about my height came out of no where and started to kiss Colby. Now the feeling in my chest turned hollow, why does it hurt?

“Well, I was here. Like I am every morning.” Colby said to the girl in a matter of fact tone. “Well I didn’t know, I didn’t see you. So who’s this freshie?” The girl said turning to me with a judging stare.

She gave me a once over before sticking her head up a bit too high. Who does she think she is? Queen of the world?

“Katherine, this is Y/N. She’s not a freshman, she’s a junior like us.” Colby introduced us. “Katherine Hive, Colby’s girlfriend.” Katherine said. “Hi.” I said quietly.

I can already tell we aren’t going to get along. The bell rang meaning it’s time for homeroom. I started to make my way to homeroom leaving that little awkward minisode of a situation with Colby, until he called out for me.

“Y/N, wait up. I’ll walk with you.” Colby called.

Turning back, I stood against a locker waiting for Colby. He laid his hand on Katherine’s shoulder telling her something before turning to me and walking. But before he could reach me, Katherine pulled him back kissing him on the lips which looks quite sloppy if you ask me. She smiled at him and glared at me before making her way to her homeroom.

“Sorry for that, she-” “Don’t want to know, that’s between you and her.” I stopped him.

Clearing his throat awkwardly, he walked me to homeroom and told me to sit next to him. This school year I already can tell is going to be full of drama. Yay...

(A/N: Part 2?)

[drinkthehalo]

Shanghai. Again.

So I went to Shanghai again last week.

(I know. Ridiculous.)

A few thoughts... Consider this a sequel to last year's concluding thoughts and guide.

The Show

Some cuts that made me sad; some improvements that made me very happy. I'll do my best not to spoil.

The Porter/Boy Witch story has improved, because they have incorporated moments to replace some of the ones that are missing due to the changed lobby space.

I love one moment where Boy Witch looks at himself in a half-shrouded mirror. If you stand behind him, you see his reflection looking back at him in the mirror, and the Porter, like another reflection, peering at him from behind the curtain to the lobby desk.

And while I still miss the Porter's mirror in "Moonlight Becomes You," I love that if you stand in the right spot, you can watch both him and Lady Macduff, their movements mirroring each other.

Boy Witch has a great moment, coming up from the ballroom dance and after teasing the audience at the lost & found, where he walks through a long dark corridor into the lobby. Following behind him, you walk into the darkness, his shadowed outline slowly becoming apparent as you approach the light of the lobby. It's a powerful moment; Boy Witch in general feels more ominous in Shanghai.

"Witches 1" looks so beautiful. I've never found a reliable place to watch the New York version - some angles are always difficult to see. But in Shanghai, the lobby desk functions like a proscenium stage, and if you stand in the center you can see the whole thing clearly. They use the space so well, the witches spending more time behind and atop the counter, and the symmetry of the spacing and the movements is gorgeous to watch.

The lack of "Is That All There Is?" is still a huge loss. :(

I also adore the moment of the Bride dancing in the trees - not only is it beautiful, but it feels achingly like Wendy in Drowned Man.

I'm sad that they cut the hide and seek between Sexy Witch and the Bride on High Street. It was so much fun, although I'd guess that the logistics were too difficult.

I do love the new scene those two have together, but in general I don't feel like the Bride's story has as compelling of a narrative arc now as it had in December. Her relationship with Sexy Witch also isn't as clear to me now.

I really miss Hecate's fifth floor scene with the Bride, also cut. :( I felt that it incorporated the Bride more clearly into the existing narrative, better clarified her relationship with Hecate, and added emotional resonance to her story.

The Husband has a more developed story now, and I loved the emotional arc of his loop.

Duncan does something totally unexpected and brilliant. Which again, I won't spoil. But I loved it.

I greatly appreciate how much more dynamic and interesting the loops of Duncan, Cunning Man, and Speakeasy Barman have become. I know there are fans who enjoy watching a character sleep, or sew, or scrub cardboard, but to me these just seem like side effects of poorly defined character loops, and I don't mourn the loss. I think it's great that these characters have more to do.

There are new 1:1s. I had some but not others. All of the ones I had impressed me very much. I won't say anything else since it's spoilery, but kudos to Punchdrunk for doing a great job developing these. 

The commercialism of the product tie-ins is a little bit distracting. But I don't think that the integrity of the show itself is compromised. The show is a work of art; I'd rather Budweiser and Kans spend their money on it than on another stupid TV commercial. I think people who criticize forget that art throughout history has been sponsored by those with money.

For the most part, the audience has gotten better since December. The stewarding is great, and one of the Woman in Bar characters actually demonstrates in her lift speech how to give performers space. It helps.

But I did make the mistake of going to the 100th show party, which was by far the worst audience experience I've ever had at a Punchdrunk show. I've honestly never experienced anything like it. People shoving ahead and pushing you behind them like a wild mob. There was no way to win - either you fall behind and can barely see, or you push ahead too, and either way you feel awful. I can't imagine how stressful this must have been for the performers as well. :(

On the plus side, 100th show Follies was delightful. (Only it's not called Follies there, I forget the actual name.) Fun to see such an interesting combination of people on stage - Lily and Sam, Conor and Garth, and several of the local cast.

The Performers

I don't even know where to begin. There are so many brilliant performers doing exceptional work; even in eight shows I didn't have time to follow everyone I wanted to see. A few specific thoughts:

Andrea Carrucciu

Andrea is brilliant. I can't complement his performances enough. He's exceptionally expressive with both his body and his eyes. From Porter to Macbeth he absolutely transforms, from sweet and awkward to intense and terrifying.  His "Moonlight Becomes You" is beautiful, and his Macbeth is convincing both in his monstrousness as a killer and the aching vulnerability of Macbeth as a man who is in way over his head.

Fania Grigoriou

Fania is delightful to follow and brilliant at engaging the audience. She fully embodies her characters in every way. The contemptuous blasphemy of her Bald Witch must be seen to be believed.

The witch combination of Fania, Miranda, and Olly is the best I've ever seen, which is saying a LOT. They have the most amazing energy, pushing each other to the next level, shrieking and cackling and smacking each other, so absolutely delightful and wicked and thrilling. I'm in awe.

Lee Wen Hsin (Debby)

I somehow ended up watching her Dragon Boat scene like five times, and was consistently awed at her performance every time.

Lily Ockwell

In some ways Lily was the star during this visit. Every show she popped up in a surprising role - Lady Macbeth, Bride, Sexy Witch, Lady Macduff, and Nurse.

I never would have expected to see her as Lady Macbeth, but she totally killed it. Lily exudes sympathetic humanity, which made the cruelty of her actions toward Duncan even more painful to watch, and her remorse completely convincing. Her final bathtub scene was heartbreaking.

Also, her Sexy Witch scream in the rave deserves its own credit in the program. I knew it was coming and I still jumped out of my skin.

Liu Yu

His Calloway is charming, handsome, and by the end he remembered the names of everyone in my group. Seems like the entire show might stop running if he ever takes a sick day.

Miranda Mac Letten

Miranda's Sexy Witch is a work of art. Dark and haunting, more layered and mysterious and compelling than I ever thought Sexy Witch could be. Her bar solo seems to defy gravity and move at light speed; it's a stunning accomplishment.

Olly Hornsby-Sayer

Olly has totally come into his own as a performer - he’s very confident and comfortable with the audience, and seems like he enjoys his roles. I had a great time following him. At one point as Boy Witch, he startled me and other audience members so much that we screamed out loud. He's gotten so great at the Boy Witch eye contact and audience interaction. As Speakeasy he was an absolute delight - I found myself laughing multiple times throughout his loop.

Omar Gordon

Some of his dialog as Cunning Man cracked me the fuck up, which I will not quote here because it's spoilery, but omg. Brilliant.

Omar's Banquo is also fabulous, never more so than in the ballroom dance, where his chemistry with Fania's Bald Witch lights up the room.

Sam Booth

Sam is a genius, let's be honest. He took a character that spends half his NY loop sleeping, and made it into one of the most interesting performances in the show. I don't want to spoil anything, but I will say this Duncan feels deeply and uniquely human, and his story is absolutely haunting.

Shen Ni

Her Hecate is riveting and terrifying.

Tang Tingting

In both her roles, she is one of the most impressive Punchdrunk performers I've ever seen. She has such presence, and can go from otherworldly and intimidating to profoundly human and sympathetic.

Tim Bartlett

I was very impressed with what I saw of his Taxidermist - didn't get any 1:1s, but even just watching his loop, I loved the intensity of his nervous energy, and the humor in his friendship with Speakeasy.

The Spaces

The Drama Hotel is open - it's Shakespeare-themed, expensive, and not designed by Punchdrunk.  It has an outdoor bar on the ground level, which is more lively than the Manderley after the show.

The eighth floor rooftop has the Cosmos Cafe, which looks like a bland version of Gallow Green, also isn't designed by Punchdrunk, and doesn't serve alcohol. The views are gorgeous.

The seventh floor has both a speakeasy and a restaurant, also not designed by Punchdrunk. I didn't go into the restaurant (it doesn't have vegan options) but I loved the speakeasy. We met a fabulous bartender there named Eddie, who'd traveled the world - his cocktails and conversation rivaled the best bartenders I've met anywhere.

The different bars feature two different cocktails named "Sleep No More" - one absinthe-based and one espresso-based. The espresso one was particularly fabulous (and appropriately named!).

Shanghai

A few updates to the recommendations I shared last time:

* James Turrell "Immersive Light" exhibition at the Long Museum. Fascinating series of artworks created with light; worth spending half a day to take it in.

* M50 Arts District, especially the Island6 gallery and its amazing artworks incorporating video, light, sound, and interactivity.

* Propaganda Poster Museum - incredibly interesting, and sheds so much light on China's historical perspective on the West.

* Huangpu River Cruise at dusk - amazing to watch the futuristic cityscape light up around you as the sun sets.

* Mount Sanqingshan - we took a two-night trip here via high speed train and climbed a beautiful mountain. Thank you @whenwillweawake​ for planning it!

The Drowned Man

I was traveling with a group who were mostly Drowned Man fans, and talking mostly to cast members who'd been in Drowned Man. Everything seemed to bring up memories of it, and we talked about it for hours. It continues to awe me how deeply that show left its impression on our souls.

[swearronchanel]

Tired of these yet? A Christmas journey in March with 4.09

I’ve actually been productive today *claps* I’m the worst™ and a procrastinator to the core, so it was about damn time I got shit done. Plus+ I ran out of clean jeans so that was some motivation to do laundry & once I started moving I just kept going haha. But today I watched the Debbie Reynolds and Carrie Fisher’s memorial & omg it was so emotional ugh. Now that I’m so sad I guess I’m going to watch Call the Midwife. Care to join me?

I closed my eyes and pointed to the episode list, looks like we’re watching 4.09 aka the 2015 Christmas special

I don’t have to pretend very hard that it’s Christmas because it was like 17 degrees f the other day lol

Am I the only one who hums along in their head to the theme song? ok nvm

Aw a baby

Tom is actually in church lol, we rarely see him there

Sister MJ lol, what is she looking for?!

Sister Winifred actually cooks/bakes pretty often

SISTER EVANGELINA 😭💔 I still miss her

Sister Winifred aka queen of cringey facial expressions, I love it

Ah no! the death joke is no longer funny sister E 😭😭 rip💔

My bby Trixie on the scene😍

What is quality street? I looked it up before but forgot. Candy right?

whoops is my American showing

I hope Sister MC comes back soon☹️

“Behold, I have located the Brandy” three cheers for alcohol 🍻 I wouldn’t choose brandy though what am I a rich old business man at a country club?

Lol Sister MJ & Sister W giggling so pure !

“You give us enough gip when you’re stone cold sober“😂 same

Gremlin kids in the front haha

Oh no😂 Babs gave them all candy and now has to make them spit it out😂

Aw I love Christmas

But looking at this snow is triggering even if it’s fake😭😂

WE’VE HAD SO MUCH THIS MONTH HERE & IT’S MARCH❄️

yikes these kids are awful, who let them up there! 😭😂

SHELAGH’S FACE 😂 SHE IS DISGUSTED OMG HAHAA

Patrick laughing so hard like same 😭😂

Welp he’s lucky, Saved by the bell thanks to Trixie

Doesn’t Sister MJ explode whatever’s in the pot?

Ahh Shelagh looks so good™!😍 I love when they dress her up!

In other news, Laura tweeted me, which means she knows I exists. What a time to be alive™😭✨👏🏼you know I was shook

Angela so precious aww, I hope my future baby is that pretty

Now I just think of The Crown when I see Mrs Willens *she’s in it if you haven’t watched*

Oh no Sister MJ!!! 😭😭 why are they always giving her illnesses! Dejala sola!

She was legit ill in the first Christmas special 😭

Love Trixie’s ponytail, why Patsy’s hair a mess tho? LOL I SHOULDN’T BE TALKING

I’m a walking ball of frizz. And when I don’t wash my hair for a few days it actually dread locks 😂 gotta love curls

Aw Delia’s not here- I forgot she cracked her head open and went back to Wales

Protect Sister MJ at every cost

Violet literally sewing Fred’s ass into the Santa pants 😂😂😂 fun fact they  did that to Olivia Newton John in Grease

not sure if I knew that because I have a junk brain of useless information or because I’m trash that reads buzzfeed

Violet’s been wearing blue eyeshadow for 3 series

“I’m not biting this, it’s too close to your backside” lol okay vi give it time. You’ll be cringeyly very handsy with each other in a bit anyway 😂

She’d do it now with no hesitation I bet

I’m here for their relationship tho😂

SISTER MJ HAD PNEUMONIA IN SERIES 1 DID SHE NOT?

Ugh distaval, fuck that. Just wait and see what chaos it brings

Aw Pats looking at the photo of Delia💔 oo wait that was a parallel then in the Cuban missile Crisis episode this series

PHYLLIS !! I missed her presence lol

Tom’s opening letter from bbc it’s lit

also: he looks good™

Poor Sister MJ! What are they feeding you, liver ew

Ah I forgot, this is when they get the tv😭

Poor Babs can’t go home for Christmas

You’ll have the nonnatus fam❤️❤️

“All should head home” *breaks out into song* THERE’S NOOO PLACE LIKE HOMEEE, FOR THE HOLIDAYSSS

Which is true because NYC is pretty beautiful at Christmas time, I can’t deny that

But also is when 100000x more people are visiting 🙃and stop in front of you when you’re walking to take pictures 🙃 *clenches fists* moving on..

Lol Tom you need to be more clear on this, they’re not getting it

Sister J shut him down 😂

“Mrs Mop” lmfao this BBC guy is a jerk😂

Laura’s another queen of facial expressions

“Aesthetics are vital” I feel

Aw Shelagh so cute being defensive of the kids of poplar

Lets be real though Shelagh’s always adorable bc Laura is an actual angel

pink wafers aye

i still have been craving them lol, there’s no bodega’s around my university though☹️

Angela is giggling, was this the last time we heard her make a noise lol

Wait this is when Sister MJ runs away

yikes measles

when did the vaccine become a thing then? that mmr shot ugh

Glad I got it because there’s supposedly someone with mumps on my campus like wtf

Why was Sister E so harsh yelling at Sister Mj!? That was unnecessary !!

LET 👏🏼SISTER 👏🏼MJ 👏🏼DECORATE👏🏼FOR👏🏼CHRISTMAS 👏🏼AND👏🏼WATCH 👏🏼TELEVISON !!

I’m so protective of her, stop😢😢

She doesn’t deserve that 💔

Sometimes I forget Patsy’s name is Patience

Fred’s Santa beard is gross ew😂😂

yikes an enema

I’d rather die

Oh no, there she goes *sings* there she goessss todayyy

Yes Babs lollipops are fascinating

She just slipped that baby out

I want to go to London at Christmas time

I love lights ✨✨

Delia! What up Bitch where you been!

BUT WAIT I HAVE A COAT THAT LOOKS REALLY SIMILAR TO MRS BUBSY’S LOL

It’s vintage too, i love it, makes me feel fabulous af

until I remember it’s probably a dead woman’s coat

WATCHING THEM LET THE BABY JUST HANG MAKES ME SO ANXIOUS OMG

“You clever girl!”

Aw poor iris 😭💔

Violet is actually so sweet & we don’t see much of her w/o Fred like why 

Everyone on this show is so sweet and pure !!! I just love it too much!

remember when I was normal and didn’t care so much about television? Yea me neither 😅

Sister MJ is gone

ALL SHE WANTED WAS TO PUT UP THE TREE!!

that necklace and sapphire ring were so pretty though 😭 wish my mom had a sapphire ring for me to inherit 

Shelagh is too pretty for this grey suit, where’s the navy one?!

I will never be comfortable with cookies being called biscuits tbh

“No dogs!” “If it can’t sing silent night I’m not interested”  SHELAGH IS GOLDEN

SHE HAS SOME GREAT LINES BUT GIVE HER MORE !!

Oh Hay Peter

if you think about it Miranda Hart put this poor guy out of a job. Like he used to have more screen time lol but he can’t be around much with out her

“Very like a family in fact” 😭 I love when they call themselves family cause they are !!

Wait rehearsing before school? Ugh that must have been so early 😂

I couldn’t have been in that choir. In high school I woke up at 6:45am everyday & started at 8:05am & only lived 2 blocks away but I still got there at 9:15am 🙃

plus I’m an awful singer 😂

“She probably thought her habit would keep her safe”

Sister Mary Cynthia says that about her self the next series when she’s attacked 😢

Babs was right though! She was just excited bendito 😭😭

How much is a bob?? £??

I barely can keep up with how many $ is a £ tbh

Lolol had to check when I donated to Laura’s fundraising 😂😂

Delia has been with this big ass bun for 3 series as well

The cafe they’re in is aesthetically pleasing

so Delia’s mom is hella protective but didn’t notice she left to another town lol??

well I guess they’re even now since patsy left & then lost contact for a bit

LET ME TELL YOU, THE FIRST TIME I WATCHED THIS EPISODE I WAS SCREAMINGGG

I THOUGHT THEY HAD KILLED SISTER MJ AND WAS FREAKING TF OUT ™

I’m trying to think of what Phyllis’s hat reminds me of

I wanna say Mary Poppins 

IT’S NOT SISTER MJ👏🏼

I knew it wasn’t but still!!!

Is Shelagh wearing lipstick? i’m here for it!

but I don’t like her dress

@ wardrobe/costume ppl be nicer to my bby pls

“Well, there’s just a word that no-one likes singing. It’s in that line and it begins with a "b”’ 😂 lmaooo c'mon Tim 😂😂

He was talking about breast feeding like how many episodes ago why is he embarrassed now? 😂

Patrick laughing 😭 me as a parent tbh

Poor sickly Sister MJ 💔

My bbys Trixie and Shelagh are ¡interacting!! 💕😍

How do I get my hair to look like Trixie’s/Helen’s

SORRY CANCELED

Lol jk all will be well bby

SISTER MJ REALLY OUT HERE IN THE WOODS, LIKE HOW ??

Ah Shelagh’s dressed up again! Love it 😍 and she’s wearing earrings & matching pearls!! so pretty!! 💕💕

this has been an episode of gushing over Laura sorry not sorry

Look at her hat, she can wear anything

LMAO HE WASN’T EVEN PETER PAN GET OUT OF HERE MAN

You have to be impressed that this 80 yr old woman with dementia found her childhood home

for real though I want Shelagh’s coat

mrs willens + shelagh was kinda a friendship & was cute

“Well I stopped holding out against that happiness, didn’t I?"💔💖

people on this show are always holding hands platonically & romantically like how sweet and pure !?

"Almost all the world was before your time child … you are concerned to see it last a little longer”

Hell yea lets get it, round up the nuns and nurses lets SING !!

“But it sometimes seems to me the older I get, the more I have to learn” 😭

“We get so much out of love, we find strength in it and courage. Love is our foundation and our fuel”

DAMN IT WHY IS THE WRITING SO GREAT??!

HEIDI CAN WRITE MY EUOLGY SINCE SHE’LL BE THE CAUSE OF MY ACTUAL DEATH WHEN THIS SHOW IS  OVER ONE DAY *WHICH IS HOPEFULLY NEVER, ..I MEAN DAYS OF OUR LIVES IS ON SEASON 50 SO IT’S NOT IMPOSSIBLE🙃🙃*

shelagh and sister j❤️❤️ so pure. I love their relationship + moments together

BUT I STILL *NEED* TRIXIE & SHELAGH TO HAVE A REAL FRIENDSHIP + ACTUAL SCENES TOGETHER

no sister, it’s not your fault that she ran away😢

broadcast about to be lit

Why did we never see Trixie giving Barbara a makeup lesson😭😂

Trixie getting excited about putting makeup on Babs like same 😂I like helping people with makeup *even though I’m not even that good haha*

“Oh some lipstick might be nice, with a touch of gay geranium you’d look quite like Jean Simmons” SISTER W SNEAKS OUT TO THE MOVIE THEATRE ON HER DAYS OFF AND NO ONE WILL CONVINCE ME OTHERWISE OK

PHYLLIS GARGLING OMG

WHY IS IT SO FUNNY 😂

yea sister E I’m sorry you were kinda bitchy

I’m sorry to call a fictitious nun a bitch oops lol

SHE’S GOING TO REDEEM HERSELF AND FIND SISTER MJ THOUGH SO IT’S OKAY!! 😭👏🏼👏🏼

Tom is so handsome! i think the collar distracts you from noticing though haha

What does wet behind the ears mean and why does it sound cringey?

on the next episode of I didn’t know I was pregnant: Christmas miracles in Poplar

No but for real it seriously was a show on TLC😂 I had a phase where I watched like every show on that channel

“Antonia! Nanny found a bible in your room again” so?? like you wish she would’ve found drugs or something?

Ugh I don’t think Sister MJ will live 3 more series & I WILL BE A WRECK™ WHEN SHE DIES

Surprise! you’re pregnant & will give birth in the next 12 mins before this show ends

imagine omg never mind not feeling safe Iris I’d be freaking tf out

I told you sister Julienne just shows up and speaks and you just feel calm

“Love is not going to be halved, but doubled” I swear someone says this again in another episode but I can’t remember

maybe I’m lying idk

The Fred + Sister E dynamic was golden

what is Sister Evangelina holding?

it looks like a bong tbh

Sister MJ saying pawning her mother’s jewels was an “interesting experience"😂 dios te bengida, she needs to always be protected  

aw pats & deels reunited *and it feeelsss so gooddd*

Fred saying rigging this raffle is immoral like HE WASNT THE BIGGEST SCAMMER IN POPLAR

I was here for it though lol😂

Phyllis gargling 😂😂

Wait omg she has earrings on how precious!

I always notice when girls/women don’t have their ears pierced because I didn’t realize for the longest time that it’s mainly just hispanics that get their ears pierced when they’re babies😂 I’ve had mine since I was six weeks old👶🏼

"Beatrix Franklin, midwife of mystery” aka my bby and ray of sunshine✨😭

it’s all good though, Trixie has Christopher, Tom has Babs, now where’s my handsome Englishman??

cue Vanessa Redgrave

“Sometimes the route to joy is indirect, our journey home not quite as we expected. There is no magic star to guide our steps, no ancient prophecies to predict our way. The greatest gift is to know that we travel not alone, but in the company of others. That there are hands as can reach for and hearts to keep us warm..”

Laura’s angelic voice blessing™ me on this Saturday night

I need it after being degenerate every other day of the week

*sings loudly* CHRISTTTTTTTT THEEEE SAVIORRRR IS BORNNNNNN

AHH I WANT CHRISTMAS NOW ! + THE CHRISTMAS SPECIAL 

patsy lowkey snuggled up on Phyllis I love it

Trixie is serving looks in the corner 😍!

I still want those hoop earrings she has!

And they finally got a tv😭👏🏼

“And the family gathered round, watching their faces flicker black and white. Their very presence in the room an act of love, a welcome home”

*BANGS FISTS ON AN IMAGINARY TABLE* THIS SHOW IS SO BEAUTIFUL AND PURE AND IF YOU DISAGREE WE CAN FIGHT

I love it

Now I must go. until next time..

[a-friendinthedark]

and three, two, one, go!!1!

 as asked by my bff, fellow God of our oc world, @sakamotorei

5. On an average day, what can be found in your character’s pockets? 

Emily –

Cash/change/cards/keys

Compact mirror/lipstick/lip-gloss/misc makeup stuff (she checks and redoes her makeup frequently)

Breath mints (in case she needs to kiss anyone lol)

Phone/portable phone charger (never leaves the house without them)

Sunglasses (there’s always a pair of sunglasses somewhere in her bag)

Pepper spray

Pads

Sometimes, jewelry she took off when she’s out 

Occasionally, bubblegum (she likes to chew them and blow bubbles, also this is a way to make her look mysterious in insta pics lol) 

6. Does your character have recurring themes in their dreams? 

Jacob –

Can’t think of any for this

7. Does your character have recurring themes in their nightmares? 

Jacob –

When he was around 7 all the way till maybe 12 he used to have dreams where he went to school, but he wet his pants, and everyone laughed at him. He would be hugging his soft toy and feeling horrible

Another dream he had all the way till he was a preteen/around 12 was a dream where he would be out with Yvonne in a foreign country but then they got separated and he couldn’t find her. He would spend the whole dream looking for her in grimy, threatening places where people leered at him

I feel like being lost in a crowd is a genuinely terrifying fear he had when he was younger. He would clutch Yvonne’s hand very tightly when they were in crowded places and press quite closely to her.

4. Has your character ever witnessed something that fundamentally changed them? If so, does anyone else know?

Jacob –

So, as a follow-up from the previous question, he probably did get lost once. It was probably when he was a kid. He was with Yvonne in a crowded place. They got separated by accident, and he couldn’t find her. He was very, very scared, and I don’t think he remembers how it ended. He only remembers that it felt like a nightmare.

Yvonne was honestly horrified/horror-struck when she realized that she lost him. She would have fiercely/frantically went to retrace their steps, but quickly decided that a faster and more efficient way was to just to go to the information counter to ask them to announce it.

It scared him badly enough that he has nightmares about it.

Nova –

If you’re looking for some deep, dark secrets……the answer’s gonna be no

I can’t think of any life-changing moments. I can see smaller moments; she was an avid reader when she was a teen. She read classics, history books, critical thinking books, all kinds of books. It started because she read a novel for school that made her think, and opened up her world-view. She was fascinated by all this information.

The other incident that affected her was when her family moved to the US in her midteens.

11. In what situation was your character the most afraid they’ve ever been? 

Jacob –

That time when he got separated from Yvonne.

Emily –

She has had one or two experiences walking home at night when she almost got mugged. She was both furious and also terrified. It’s why she carries pepper spray everywhere.

Also, it’s likely one of the many guys who liked her tried to harass her. Though I don’t think she was scared. Maybe a little. But mostly mad.

Nova –

If someone she loves was in danger. She would be terrified but furious.

12. In what situation was your character the most calm/comfortable they’ve ever been?

Jacob –

At night when he is at home, and Yvonne is also at home. It’s his safe place. Maybe he reads a book or watches TV with Yvonne. He’s peaceful and content.

Nova –

She is calm nearly 80% of the time (the other 20%, she is angry).

She is most calm and comfortable when she is spending time with people she loves (her family, Emily).

Emily –

When she’s doing something engrossing and no one is interrupting. E.g. when she does her makeup, she hums cheerfully/energetically to herself.

She is most comfortable when she’s 

13. Is your character bothered by the sight of blood? If so, in what way?

Jacob & Nova & Emily –

Around the same tolerance for all of them tbh, in other words, it depends on how much blood. 

None of them are bothered by a bit of blood. E.g. if you get a papercut or a scratch.

If they see test-tubes of blood or blood in packets, they are also not very bothered by it. Jacob will be uneasy and grossed out if he can taste or smell blood.

If there’s a lot of blood, then naturally they are all anxious/concerned/worried. Nova keeps her cool best, and starts giving orders. Emily might start panicking. Older!Jacob can keep a cool head, and will quietly/urgently try to staunch the blood.

19. What is your character’s biggest relationship flaw? Has this flaw destroyed relationships for them before? 

Emily –

Depends on which age the question refers to.

When Emily was younger, one relationship that was ruined was teen!Wemily. Because of her fun family and siblings, she had a pretty good time at home, so she was very cheerful in a way that’s breezy. Think kid!Judy Hopps. She was happy about everything, and she liked everything. She didn’t really stop to appreciate or think of the meaning something might have had to her. That kind of ruined her relationship with Wendie.

When she’s 20+, she appreciates people more and spontaneously shows affection. She’s quite easy-going about most things…maybe her temper? When she lets her temper get the better of her and she says blunt things? E.g. Ana calling Elsa out: “There it is, the door you love to slam in my face.” (Sagittarius lol) She doesn’t mean it maliciously, she just calls it as she sees it. Her temper blows over quickly, so after she vents it, she’s fine.

Nova –

When she was younger, she kept to herself a lot, and showed outsiders a cool, composed, and controlled front. That guarded facade stopped others from getting close to her/her from getting close to others. Also, she was more rigid and controlling.

Now that she’s 20+… It depends. She doesn’t proactively share about herself/she’s quite taciturn, so that could be a problem…but she voluntarily shares information about herself if the conversation is on that topic. She just doesn’t volunteer information out of the blue. So, I’d probably pick her detachment/indifference. When she is closer to a person, she does show more warmth. Hasn’t ruined any relationships yet.

20. In what ways does your character compare themselves to others? Do they do this for the sake of self-validation, or self-criticism? 

Emily –

In the timeline without her siblings, she used to compare to validate herself when she was a teenager. She would frequently compare herself with others who were ‘uglier’ than her, or of lower social status, and she would dismiss/reduce them, so it affirms how she’s the queen bee.

With her siblings around, she tends to look down on people less. She tends to find people cool more often, and look up to these people. So…encouraging/positive self-criticism?

Nova –

During her teenage years: in school, she tended to compare to others who were not as successful as she is, and feel validated. She would also compare to other students more successful than her and feel begrudging/resentful/jealous/insecure. It was because she felt that she was superior, so she should be the most successful/superior.

But she also aspired to be like her father, or to live up to him. 

When she grew a little older, she also started to aspire to be like certain public figures who caught her attention.

Jacob –

He doesn’t compare to validate himself, but he doesn’t really compare for self-criticism either. Because he doesn’t really….he doesn’t really take other people’s achievements personally? I guess? Even if he saw people successful, he thinks “That’s nice", but he never thinks of it in relation to himself. He rarely wants to be like other people. 

Even if he met someone who was good at something he likes, he asks the person for help, but doesn’t feel insecure about it. I can see him starting to compare in a self-criticizing way when people around him start to deride him while praising the other person. He starts to feel bad about himself, and he wants to be like that other person. But he doesn’t really want to be that person, he just wants the acceptance that the other person is accorded.

22. What does your character like in other people? 

Nova –

She tends to like people who know what they want. She also likes people with opinions, especially if they are unconventional. She might not agree, but she is interested in hearing their reasons and she thinks it shows that the person has depth, coz it means they think about things. (Unless it’s someone like Theo who is deliberately provocative and has no real reason for things except just coz he can). She also appreciates expressive and social/friendly people coz she is not good at small talk.

A dealbreaker for her is sloppiness. She is very irked by disorganization and bad habits, like leaving things on the floor, not tidying up after yourself, dumping everything everywhere…

Emily –

She likes people who know how to have fun. She also likes people who can match her pace and introduce her to new things; and she likes people who are unique and bold.

A dealbreaker for her is someone who is a wet blanket. Debbie Downers, and people who are pessimistic and bleak. It makes her feel really constricted/restricted, and she really hates that.

(I’m seeing even more why Nemily works out).

Jacob –

He likes people who don’t make him feel threatened and unsafe, e.g. loud, obnoxious, invasive, rude (think Theo). He doesn’t like things to be sprung on him, and he likes people who are reliable, trustworthy, and consistent.

23. What does your character dislike in other people? 

Emily –

When it seems (to her) like you’re purposely being an ass. E.g. Theo. Someone who is very antagonistic and hostile to anything she says, tries to turn every friendly overture she makes into something to attack her with. She starts frowning a lot, and after a while, she sharply calls you out and then goes off in a huff to talk to someone else

When you talk shit about people in a way that uses personal attacks and makes it very ugly, especially if it’s someone she likes. She bitches about people too, but it’s more of a vent/expression of her frustration and irritation, and less of a personal attack. So, if you do this around her, she starts to frown. She finds it unreasonable and she doesn’t like it. She will try to redirect the conversation, but if she can’t, she will just leave lol

When you try to tell her what to do. When you condescend to her, tell her what choices/decisions she should make, how she should feel, tell her what to do, judge her, control her… She’s pretty fine with it if you don’t like things she does. She’s not okay with it when you try to change her

37. Is your character more concerned with defending their honor, or protecting their status? 

Nova – 

Dignity and honor are most important to her. But how she chooses to act depends on what’s at stake in each situation. In some cases, she would swallow her dignity and pride and protect her status instead, because she thinks it’s more important to the long run. In others, she chooses to defend her honor.

Emily –

I feel like honor = status to her? So defending one is defending the other?

41. Does your character feel that they deserve to have what they want, whether it be material or abstract, or do they feel they must earn it first? 

Jacob –

He doesn’t have inferiority issues, so, not really.

But I think he feels better working/earning for what he gets/wants. Coz if he got everything he wanted without any kind of effort, I feel like he feels uneasy about how lucky he is.

44. How easy or difficult is it for your character to say “I love you?” Can they say it without meaning it? 

Nova –

Doesn’t say it unless she means it. She always says what she means and means what she says. 

It is a little difficult for her to say it. She expresses her love in other ways, and tends not to say it (forgets to, if that’s possible) except when she’s feeling really affectionate.

Emily –

Says it quite easily and casually. Someone does a favor for her, she’s like, “Thank you so much!! I love you!!”

I don’t think she can say it without meaning it coz she doesn’t lie, she’s very guileless to the point of bluntness on occasion. But she’s already very casual about saying ILYs, so it’s really people she doesn’t like that she can’t say this to.

Jacob –

He is self-conscious, because Yvonne brings him up and she doesn’t express her love for him in this way. It’s probably coz of Day that he is comfortable with it at all. When he is older, he is comfortable with it.

He can’t say it without meaning it. He would just keep quiet in that Jacob-way HAHA. He only ever says ILY to Day lol.

Thanks for asking! That was really long and I tried to keep it as organized as possible. Hope it was entertaining and easy to read.

[deanssexplorations]

New York (Married) Couple

About two years ago I had a trip to New York in which I would have a free evening, but nothing to fill it with. After a little online searching I met Debbie and Greg, an attractive, professional, married couple living in Manhattan with their two pre-teen children. Interestingly I met them on AdultFriendFinder as opposed to my usual OK Cupid, so I knew they were serious.

As it turns out I was also their first face-to-face meeting via AFF, and even moreso, while they were in an open marriage and were actively exploring play opportunities, I was also their first complete stranger - i.e. I was the first person who was not already a friend of one or the other who they were planning to meet, and, assuming everyone agreed, go off and fuck. In fact, this was a sufficiently large step for them that we did a Facetime meeting before even getting in person together in New York. I think that was the only time I've done that prior to a face to face (and I seriously doubt they do that anymore either). They were both articulate, intelligent, and attractive. I was psyched.

The morning of my trip I made my way to San Francisco airport, only to find that my flight had been cancelled due to a huge storm in New York. Unfortunately, that was the night we were to meet, and I had arranged an early morning departure to allow the time. It was actually a bit of a nightmare because everyone else was trying to book seats on one of the few remaining flights that day. My travel agent tried to get me on a redeye, or barring that a flight arriving at 11:30 p.m. in New York (instead of my original 5:00 arrival time) and as much as I wanted to explain that I really needed to be there because I had an important sex date I needed to keep, I managed to find other ways to convey my urgency to my travel agent.

In the end I got a business class seat on another airline (good thing my client was paying for it!) and ended up having a perfectly enjoyable flight. I did arrive a little after my original schedule, but Debbie and Greg were running a little late anyway, so it didn't end up making a difference in the end.

Whew.

We had agreed to meet at my hotel bar for a drink and to assess the chemistry. I had finished my grooming and prep schedule early (I do like to be manscaped when I meet new people) so headed down to wait. I found a table with a view of the entry way, ordered a drink, and waited for my nerves to settle a bit.

For yes, I had a good amount of nervous energy going on. While I had done threesomes before, this would be my first married couple. And heck, I was about to (possibly) have sex with them!  I was certainly excited and ready to go.

After a while I saw them enter the bar. Debbie was wearing a sexy, slinky black dress. She was extremely attractive with short, blonde hair and a winning smile. Greg was the consummate gentleman, and was looking very dapper in a black suit and sport coat with a purple shirt and no tie. We introduced ourselves and ordered a drink, and fell into easy conversation - although all parties admitted right then and there that we were all experiencing some nerves. That alone was a great icebreaker!

After we finished our drinks, I proposed we get a second drink, but take it up to my room. They readily agreed. Once in my room, we did the "awkward standing around shuffle" that I've come to associate with threesomes or moresomes in hotel rooms with too few places to sit (other than the bed). And this being a small Manhattan hotel room, elbow room was at an even greater premium. So to break the ice (and receiving Greg's encouragement), I leaned in and gave Debbie a kiss.

She was incredibly sexy, and was a fantastic kisser. Our lips meshed as her body melted up against mine. I wrapped my arms around her slender waist and traced the curve of her amazing ass. I don't think I mentioned it, but she was an executive at a New York health club, and she had the tight body to show for it.

Lucky me.

We had established when enjoying our drinks that Greg didn't mind watching, was happy for Debbie to enjoy herself with other men. But I also established that I am very inclusive and didn't intend for any one of us - Greg especially - to be left out of the mix. So as much as I was enjoying her company, I made a point to make eye contact and check in with him. At this point he was preparing the room, pulling out his cock ring, and making sure the bed was prepped. I beckoned him over to give his wife a kiss, and while the two of them were thus engaged I entertained myself by peeling Debbie's dress off - which turned out to be a black skirt and a black top - so even more to peel off!

Things went from there. Debbie was naked pretty quickly, and Greg and I got there as well albeit a bit more slowly. Part of my pre-encounter prep consisted of donning my own cock ring, and as soon as she took my boxers off, Debbie exclaimed, "look, Greg, Dean's wearing a cock ring!"  This because Greg was in the process of putting his on as well. Great minds think alike.

As it turns out, the similarity didn't end there. Once the two guys' cocks were out, we all three were amazed at how similar they were. Our cocks were almost exactly the same size and shape, with the same hood and the same balls. If the two were in a lineup, I'm not sure I'd be able to tell for sure which was mine.

Which was probably a tad freaky but I'm sure pretty fun for Debbie. Sort of like getting fucked by her husband's cock. And by her husband's other cock. She sucked my cock while Greg fucked her, and I fucked her while she sucked his cock. At which point I asked if they had done DP, and Debbie excitedly ventured that no, they hadn't done it, at least not successfully - yet. She asked if I had done it (I told her I had) and we agreed to give it a try.

I was the man on the bottom, with Debbie sitting on the edge of the bed straddling my cock, and Greg standing behind her ready to do ass duty. Unfortunately there were too many legs vying for the same space so we never actually made it work. We also tried DV while we were all in the right position, and I think there was a fraction of a second during which the tip of Jeff's cock joined mine in Debbie's pussy, but for the most part the DP/DV adventure went unfulfilled.

But not to worry. Debbie got her wish a few months later with another gentleman they met in New York. I know because I have photographic evidence.

So instead we went back to sucking and fucking. I spent some lovely time with her fantastic pussy. It was small and tight and beautifully proportioned. And I fucked it quite a bit. But I think the iconic image from that evening, in my mind at least, was Debbie on her knees while Greg and I stood in front her, both fully erect, both sporting our cock rings, while she enjoyed the two nearly identical cocks. She had one in each hand, then took one in her mouth, then the other. She went back and forth like this for a while as Greg and I enjoyed the view.

Finally I came in her pussy, while Greg came on her chest, and after cuddling for a bit, we decided to go for dinner. They took me to a nice Italian place nearby while the three of us compared notes on former lovers and friends with benefits (and talked about work and family of course). Interestingly to me, they hadn't really connected with the swinger's/sex club crowd in New York yet, and they were fascinated to hear about my experiences with that scene in San Francisco. I told them they should come out at some point and that we could double date at my favorite sex club. Pulling out my phone, I even showed them some of my FWBs and took requests.

I guess I was sufficiently persuasive, because we kept in touch when I returned to the Bay Area, and I convinced them to schedule a weekend in San Francisco at the end of the summer. They did make it out, I found a date (actually, two), and the five of us ended up having a mind-blowing evening at my favorite sex club in San Francisco.

But that's another story, one which you'll just have to wait to read...

;-)

[secondsofhappiness]

But do you remember we were really looking forward to seeing how Rob dealt with Aaron in self destruct mode - he hasn't really been in the thick of it with when Aaron's been like that before & is lashing out at other people instead of himself so it's really interesting seeing it play out on screen- I hope it doesn't disappoint!! Also one more question- why do you think Aaron is such a marmite character? 🙏

I think most of the characters on the show are to be honest.I love Aaron to death, have done ever since he showed up. A lot of that is down to Danny's acting because he makes him painfully human. I can't relate to a lot of what he has gone through as a character but it doesn't matter because I feel for him and some of the things I do understand and connect to his character with make me love him more. He does go from light and fun to extremely dark in a heartbeat (take this week...!) and I think some people might struggle with that. He's a great character though, so varied and funny and dark and complex and sad and strong and sensitive and loveable and soft and yet he can be so angry. I love him and always have done but he is VERY complex and I can see why some people might not get him or like to watch him and that's fine :) I think Robert's WAY more of a marmite character! My love for Rob is also massive for very similar reasons - mainly the fact he has MANY different facets to his character that makes him fascinating to me!There are tons of characters on the show that you either love or hate like Cain or Charity or Chas or Debbie or Paddy... i tend to love complex, quirky, weird, difficult or varied characters which is why so many of them are my favourites.So I guess I don't think Aaron, personally, is any more of a marmite character than half of the village!!

[mredlich21]

Last part!  Which is also frankly my favorite part because the Rajesh Khanna funeral was INSANE!!!!  Also, I really like Twinkle’s post-marriage life. (part 1 here and part 2 here)

First, my usual disclaimer so no one gets mad at me: Everything I am about to say may be true, or it may not be true.  I don’t know these people personally, I am just telling you what is the generally accepted “truth” about them, in case you are new to the films and hadn’t heard it before.

  In the first two parts, we went over Rajesh Khanna’s rise to be India’s first superstar, his surprise marriage to an untried teenager Dimple, Dimple’s leaving him and taking her kids and restarting her career, their respective post-marriage relationships (Rajesh with Tina Munim-going-to-be-Ambani, Dimple with Sunny Deol), and then the launch of their daughters, Twinkle and Rinke resulting in average careers and retirement and marriage for both daughters.  Twinkle married one of the top actors, and top playboys, in the industry, Akshay Kumar.  And she was the making of him, guiding him towards profitable and critically acclaimed roles, improving his career enormously post-marriage.  Which Akshay acknowledges.  Which makes him seem like a really great husband, even if he was a terrible boyfriend (secretly engaged to 3 woman at once and cheating on all of them with Rekha).

Post-marriage, Twinkle retired almost immediately and had their son and became a housewife/interior designer/writer.  “Interior design” is one of those things star wives like to do, Suzanne and Gauri are “interior designers” too.  I’m putting it in quotes not because I don’t believe they take it seriously, or even have made a success of it (with Gauri’s branching out into real estate development and everything else), but it’s definitely a kind of job you can only have if you are that kind of wife.  With the start up funds and the connections and the free time to focus on it.

What really impresses me about Twinkle is that she is all 3 of these things, and does all 3 of them well.  She is very very good at being a star wife/house wife.  She knows what to wear and where to go and who to be friends with.  And she makes it look easy and natural, not like she is trying to suck up to anyone.  And she is also a good interior designer.  She may not have the huge success that Gauri is enjoying right now, but she has her store and has had it for several years.  And finally, as a writer, she has had a column for several years and kept it up regularly.  Her first book, a collection of columns, was released a little bit ago.  And her second book, a collection of sort of human interest sketches, just came out.  I haven’t read the new one yet, but I read her first book and highly highly recommend it!  It’s a fun and easy read, she has a charming voice in it, and it’s a really fun inner look at life in a superstar’s house.  I am sure she wouldn’t have been offered the original column if she hadn’t been Akshay’s wife/Rajesh’s daughter/Dimple’s daughter, but after being given that first chance, she has succeeded on her own merit as a writer.

(Highly recommended!)

Oh, and she also made Akshay’s career!  He credits her with helping him focus and work better, and it’s certainly true that the years after their marriage were very very good for him.  And more recently, he credits her with reviving his artistic merit, because she straight up told him she wouldn’t have a second child unless he stopped making rubbish movies.  I believe that it is good for Akshay to have someone who tells him the truth and is upfront with him in general, this is a big advantage of having a wife.  And I also believe that Twinkle is very smart and insightful just on her own (like I said, I really liked her book).  But I can’t help thinking about Twinkle growing up watching her father make those producers wait, watching her mother successfully get her second innings in the industry, even watching her “Chote Papa” navigate his launch.  She’s got way more knowledge and training in how to build a career that lasts than Akshay ever could have.  That’s the difference between a sort of insider-outsider like Akshay (right schools, right neighborhood, right friends), and a real insider like Twinkle (grew up with 90% of the people working in the industry today).

(Love her and Karan together. That’s why Rani’s character was named “Tina” in KKHH, it was supposed to be played by Twinkle)

My favorite thing about the Twinkle and Akshay relationship is how AWESOME Akshay is as a son-in-law!  This all female family had been struggling along for years, and now suddenly there he is!  Escorting Dimple at every event, joking with her, taking care of her, and seeming to sincerely enjoy all of it!  I also, by the way, love the little glimpses we get of how Twinkle and Dimple get along in her writings.  While Akshay is enthusiastic and interested in everything, Twinkle is a bit more sarcastic and irritated with Dimple’s sudden impulses and constant optimism.  Kind of reminds me of the stories that are coming out about Carrie Fisher and Debbie Reynolds.  I would love it if someday Twinkle writes her own Postcards From the Edge book!

(here’s Akshay joking with Dimple while Twinkle laughs at them.  And Aamir is there too for some reason.  It’s Twinkle’s book launch, maybe she pulled on those “I’ve known you since we were in diapers” connections)

Akshay, supposedly, also settled down.  Likes to avoid location work, to be at the studio at 9 and out by 5, to be home and in his own bed before ten and up to have breakfast with his kids.  But there are, very occasionally, still rumors about his little flings with his co-stars.  Priyanka, Katrina, Sonakshi.

When rumors are this consistent, I either don’t believe any of them or believe all of them.  With Akshay, I’m not sure which way to go.  It could just be that he is a supportive and friendly co-star, and so it appears that he is having an affair with everyone he works with, but really he is just being nice.  Or he could actually be having an affair with every co-star he works with.  However, if he is, I think it would be with Dimple’s awareness/permission.  Maybe it’s just the afterglow of their fabulous Koffee appearance, but really, all their public appearances feel the same way.  Not touchy and respectful and putting on a show for the media, but just kind of casual and natural and unrehearsed.  And, if nothing else, I’ve seen Twinkle’s old films!  She just isn’t that good of an actor!  So they must be happy in their marriage for real.

Before leaving Twinkle and Akshay, I want to take a moment for their kids.  They are very protective parents, there are few photos available of their son and almost none of their daughter.  But as their son gets older, they are slowly bringing him out more and more.  And I have to say, he looks EXACTLY like his grandfather!  Or maybe I’m imagining it, what do you think?

  Since I mentioned Rajesh, yaaay!  I finally get to talk about his funeral!  And, I guess, the slow decline that lead to it.  Rajesh’s film career was essentially over by the 90s.  He switched to politics at this point, and Dimple even campaigned for him.  Again, I am fascinated by how the lifelong marriage works!  Sure, they had been separated for years, and still were living separately, but he was also her husband and always in her life, and so she would campaign with him and appear together on his victory parade.  And, from the other side of things, sure Rajesh had had at least one other serious relationship post-marriage, but when it came time to appear in public, the only woman who would want by his side is his wife, forever.

That “forever” was true at the end as well.  It came fast, his end, the rumors started going around that he was sick, and suddenly Dimple had moved back into Aashirwad to take care of him, Twinkle and Rinke were in and out of the house too, we all got daily updates, and then he was gone.  But not before making a few final appearances to greet the crowds who were once again, after years away, massed outside his gates.

  Now, look at the timeline of these photos.  Akshay helps him out.  Akshay explains what is happening.  Akshay shows him how to wave.  Rajesh waves.  Akshay starts waving too, and Dimple backs up and tries not to cry.

You see why I love Akshay for this?  He is SUCH A GOOD SON-IN-LAW!!!!  And it’s not just that he showed up to help take care of his ailing father-in-law, anyone would do that.  It’s that he took charge of the public face of it too, used his own stardom powers and experience to give dignity to Rajesh and take some of the public scrutiny off of Dimple.

He couldn’t protect them from everything though.  Remember Anita Advani who I was a little mean about in the last section?  Yeah, there was a reason for that.  She had lived with and taken care of Rajesh for years.  But at the very end, he asked for his wife and daughters.  Dimple dropped everything and moved back into that house (which must have been all kinds of painful for her), and eventually so did Twinkle and Rinke.  Even Anju, his very first girlfriend (who never married after they broke up), came too, because he wanted her.  But Anita was quietly shut out.  And, after Rajesh died, she learned that he hadn’t even left her the house, the one thing he promised her.  He left everything to his daughters, and they did not want her there.

Okay, all of that kind of makes me sympathize with Anita.  But what kills all of that sympathy is that instead of trying to find some way of gently conveying her situation, homeless and having wasted 20 years of her life on a man who never really cared for her (sample memory: “When I would ask him if he slept with other women while he was on location, he would say ‘what does it matter, I come back to you, don’t I?'”), she went straight to the media.  And I mean STRAIGHT to the media!  Like within days of Rajesh’s death, while the family was no doubt still in shock with grief, suddenly there are stories everywhere about “Rajesh Khanna’s last love”.  And how Dimple was so cruel and heartless to her, how the whole family didn’t appreciate her feelings, how Rajesh really really loved her, not his horrible old wife.  I’m sure poor Dimple, having just lost her husband who, no matter what problems they had, was also the father of her two children and the man she married at age 15, having had this emotional rollercoaster of moving in and taking care of him, only to see him fade away, was not in any state to read a bunch of articles about how she was the villain in a soap opera, getting into a catfight and heartlessly throwing out the poor innocent heroine.  Anita even filed a lawsuit against them, including the random detail that she claimed her relationship with Rajesh started when she was only 13, and threatening to release photos and videos of “intimate moments”.  I just googled a little, and it looks like the lawsuit is still dragging on in various ways, and Anita is still popping up to offer quotes criticizing the family at the drop of a hat.

Let’s see, is that it for the Twinkle-Dimple-Akshay-Rajesh story?  I think so!  YAAAAY!  My reward!  I get to write about Rajesh’s funeral!

Rajesh supposedly left detailed specific instructions for how he wanted his last journey to go.  But really all he had to say was “I want to go out like freaking Snow White!”  The end result was, a funeral train the wound through Bombay, featuring Rajesh’s corpse in a glass coffin for all to see.

And they did!  “All” that is.  Thousands upon thousands of people turned out, whole streets had to be shut down.  In the end, the trip was cut short because the crowds were so large it was becoming a civic problem.  Let’s see if I can do this like it’s a crane shot pull back thing in a movie.  First, the close up on the front of the crowd, which is being driven back by policeman.

Then slightly farther back, so you can start to grasp the size of it.

And a little bit further

And a little bit further.  This is immediately outside the crematorium where Rajesh’s body was being taken.

  And, in case you thought I was exaggerating about the Snow White effect, here’s a close-up of his float, complete with the closest members of his family riding along.

(Notice the glass coffin that Dimple is trying to balance)

And again, by the way, I love Akshay!  He was right there, front and center the whole time, organizing this incredibly complicated send-off and taking the emotional weight so his wife and sister and mother-in-law could just focus on their grief.  Even handling the kids!  That’s Aarav next to him on the float.

  But you know what the biggest honor was for Rajesh?  Not all of this send-off and the pomp and the thousands who gathered.  No, it was the honor given him by possibly the only living person who could really understand what his life was like back in the day when he was king of films.

Amitabh goes to almost every funeral.  He seems to consider it part of his responsibility as the Biggest Superstar.  And, of course, he had to come for Rajesh’s funeral.  Not just the funeral, but the cremation as well, which was more of a family affair.

The photos I showed above of the parade, that was on the way to the crematorium.  Amitabh had to get there as well, with Abhishek to support him.  Only their car got caught in the crowd.  Here, have another group of photos.

The crowd realized who was arriving and swarmed the car:

The car couldn’t move and the crowd wouldn’t be beaten back.  In any other situation, the police would have forced an exit route and Amitabh would have been whisked away.  But in this case, it was Rajesh Khanna’s funeral.  So instead, Amitabh and Abhishek exited the car and walked.

And walked

And walked.

and walked

And walked

All the way through this wild crowd scene the last 300 feet to the crematorium.  Because it’s Rajesh Khanna, the one man that even Amitabh Bachchan will lower himself to the human level to honor.

      Oh, I’m all emotional!  Okay, to recover, time to think about who I am covering next!  I’m gonna make this simple, you only have 3 choices:

  Rekha

Meena Kumari

The Chopras

  Hindi Film 101: Khanna-Kapadia-Kumar, the Final Chapter! Unto Death Last part!  Which is also frankly my favorite part because the Rajesh Khanna funeral was INSANE!!!!  Also, I really like Twinkle's post-marriage life.