#Ego should be a tumblr sexy man

[nums-bird]

My blue lock fans,I got a question for y'all

Why tf isn't Ego a Tumblr sexyman.Like,think about it.He literally matches all of the traits;tall,lanky,a little psychotic,looks like he hasn't slept for 3 years and he literally only eats yakisoba for breakfast,lunch and dinner.Did I mention how blunt and straight to the point he is.We need Ego as a Tumblr sexyman ASAP

[theyanderespecialist]

(Remake) Base Yandere Vox Headcanons: Go Big or Go Home (Hazbin Hotel)

[Hello, My Sexy Muffins! you all DEMANDED Vox and in the last 28 days over 3000 views for the Old VERY Short Vox one I did a long time ago! Now that we have what he will be like in canon! It is time to do a remake! This will be not only on YouTube, but Wattpad, an Archive of our own, and Tumblr! So let's do this! Enjoy this chapter my sexy muffins. 

(Disclaimer: Vox in canon is just as bad as Valentino as he knows what Valentino does and condones it. Even offering to get the lowest earners for Val to pew pew. It is OKAY to simp for the Villains as long as they are fictional, and as long as you do not condone what they do in real or do what they do, and that you do not support their actions! They are fictional and no actual people were hurt by them in REAL LIFE! 

Disclaimer 2: Vox is not yandere in canon, this is just for fun and not to be taken seriously at all! Simping for fictional characters and yanderes is fine, just do not be illegal or gross about it! Yanderes are not ideal partners to have in real life! Also, remember to separate fiction from reality and headcanon from canon! Thank you, Enjoy!) 

-Remade Base Yandere Headcanons With Vox From Hazbin Hotel-

.Vox is a businessman at his very core. He is a very good one at that. 

.He is also an overlord and wants to become even more powerful and stronger. 

.He fell for you right away and made you his assistant. 

.That way he can control you as much as he can, cause man oh man is this man manipulative. 

.With you he manipulates you to make sure you never leave his side and that you are always at his beck and call. 

.He is very demanding of your attention, he has to have it on him as much as possible. 

.He despises when you pay attention to others, he is the only one you should look at. 

.The only one that makes you smile, the only one to make you laugh, HE HAS TO BE YOUR ONE AND ONLY. 

.He may very slightly share you with Val, but he is for SURE Going to be the one to marry you! 

.He will have you wear sexy little work outfits, if females with those nice pencil skirts that grab all your curves and or muscles. 

.He loves to have you bend over in front of him (I bet he is an ass man~) to pick something up, he is so checking out your ass. 

.He has the biggest ego of any yandere I have done from Hazbin Hotel. So of course he will KNOW that he is the best suitor for you. 

.Why would you want anyone lower than him when you can have one of the Vees, maybe two if he shares you with Val? 

.Also he would so see you as a trophy spouse. 

.The pretty little thing he takes to parties and shows off as a prize. 

.He is also very touchy-feely with you. 

.hand holding, kissing, groping, hair stroking, and of course lots of sex 

.He loves to touch and make love to you, and he cannot get enough of it. 

.He surprisingly does not want to use his mind-controlling powers over you. 

.He will use them as a very last resort. He does not want to force you in that way. 

.He may slip and try it, but he rather not do it to you! 

(Similar to how he almost used it on Val in episode 2 but how he stopped himself) 

. The only times he does use it on you is to make you hate someone. 

.So that way you will never want to leave him.

.Not to force you to like him but to force you to hate anyone you ever got feelings for that was not him or Val. 

.He does have an angry side as a yandere that is for sure. 

.Being the very jealous type of yandere, he hates when you show interest in others, praise others, or give any attention to others. 

.He also would DESPISE if you enjoyed Alastor's radio show. 

.That is absolutely forbidden! There will be no ADMIRING That Fossile! 

.He is also a very petty yandere! 

.He is so aggressively petty when it comes to you like others. He gets super pouty and very passive-aggressive. 

.He can be a bit of a brat when it comes to your attention fr fr! 

.He also has such daddy energy! (WE ALL SAW IT With him acting like a football dad watching alastor get beat by Adam, he legit acted like his team was winning in sportsball) 

.So he does take a firm hand with you to make you stay in line and are his good little darling 

.He would deal with rivals by mainly hypnotizing them to not like you, and stay away from you. 

.But if he is extra pissed off enough he will torture them and make a public example of it as well! 

.He makes it clear to all of hell that you are his and his alone, no one else can have you. 

.His confession of his love to you, will be a grand moment. (Most likely he will have it on live TV) 

.He is so confident that you will say yes! 

.If you do say yes, he is over the moon and is riding the high of finally having you for months! 

.If you say no, the audio and visual are cut and he grabs you by the arm. Shouting at you of how dare you humiliate him like that! 

.He then will force a kiss on you and make you his, he is going to teach you that you never say no to him. 

.If that does not work he will use his mind control powers to make you love him. 

.He did not want to do it, but you forced his hand! 

.Side note he is also the go big or go home type of yandere. 

.In which he will go big with his love for you. 

.He also will very much be a sugar daddy type of yandere. 

.You are his and he is going spoil you. 

.He is Very much buying your love. 

.AND VERY CONTROLLING 

.As his partner and his future spouse you have to uphold his brand and his image, you are his darling and he is not going to have you looking cheap. 

.So be ready to be spoiled and more or less forced to be in his style. 

.He does adore you and can be super sweet and affectionate with you. 

.Again he may share you with Val so be ready for that! 

[YASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS another chapter is done I hope you all enjoyed this chapter and stay sexy all of my sexy muffins!] 

[rans-baby]

when you get sexually harassed

a/n repost now that i'm free from tumblr jail ♡

tw // sexual harassment, men (ew), dissociation, blood, implied murder, idk what else lmk if there is anything else!

RAN

he knew how friendly you could be, even with strangers 

what he didn't know was the extent of your kindness

you tended to have a regular schedule: walk to the gym, come back and get ready for work, have breakfast, work, and then maybe go for a walk 

he should've recognized that the regularity of your schedule could leave you vulnerable but you'd never complained to him before so he didn't really think about it

which is why when he heard about your predicament, all he could do was internally berate himself

"apparently he said he's seen me on the way to the gym in the mornings and told me that he thought I was pretty and when I told him I had a boyfriend, he wouldn't back off"

all he could do in that moment was hold you as he watched your eyes become unfocused and your expression turn blank 

he let the other executives know that he wasn't going to be able to work for the rest of the week and let you fall asleep on his lap 

the next morning he decided to go on the same route as you, trailing behind you nonchalantly just far away enough that people wouldn't associate you guys as being together

he watched as a man approached and from the way you were curling in on yourself he knew that he was the one 

he took long strides towards the both of you, gripping the man by the shoulder and for some reason the man thought it'd be a good idea to talk back

"oh this your bitch? you should keep her on a tighter leash with the way she's dressed"

he didn't respond to the childish taunt, just taking note of the man's appearance and stalking off with your hand in his

he sent a quick text to his brother asking him to track the man down, deciding to deal with it at night. he wouldn't want to scare his baby

later that night, he watched as the man struggled in the chair he was tied up on, shivering from the AC that was cooling the inside of the warehouse to seemingly sub-zero temperatures (but maybe it just felt like that to him since he was half naked and bleeding out)

"maybe that'll teach you to respect baby ♡ or not, I guess it won't really matter in the afterlife"

IZANA

my possessive KING

he knows you're your own person, he gets that but you're still his property at the end of the day and anyone that'd try and come between that would pay 

you guys regularly went to the gym together, it was one of the only consistent times that he knew he could spend time with you 

you each tended to do your own thing though, not really feeling the need to do the same things 

he'd like to say he was a pretty observant guy, which is why his ego took a pretty big hit when he saw a man approach you claiming that he'd seen you before 

"I've just been wondering who that sexy girl that trains so hard every day was"

you just stared at him, mouth AJAR at the audacity to approach you and the lack of common sense it took to start a conversation with possibly one of the most disgusting pickup lines you'd ever had the displeasure of hearing 

izana heard as you explained to him that you had a partner and his mind blanked out when he heard the man's response

"he doesn't need to know, it could be our little secret. you know, I'm in a relationship too"

he absolutely despised disloyalty, remembering the hurt from his past and he hated the idea of you being the one to betray him even more 

he watched as your panicked teary eyed gaze met his and he knew in that moment that yup, I might go to jail but this is so going to be worth it

now normally, izana was a pretty calm and collected guy his anger only showing in the tiny nuances of his expression, but never fully revealing the depth of his anger but the crazed look in his eye let you know that this man was not about to make it to see the next day

"mind going to hell together?" and before he knew it the man was on the floor, not quite knocked out yet because he wanted to make it hurt

it was a good thing that everyone knew who he was and minded their business as they saw everything go down 

izana dragged him by his t shirt, calling up kakucho and letting him know that they had some business to take care of

"hey princess, why don't you wrap up and head home I'll probably be home for dinner but don't wait up ♡"

[coquelicoq]

[Image description: 10 stills from the anime "Natsume's Book of Friends" featuring the character Natori Shuuichi with tumblr text posts edited in.

Image 1: Natori is waving and smiling in front of a background of sparkles and roses. The text post is by tumblr user YandereChild-Archive and reads "me, introducing myself: it is i, your local asshole"

Image 2: Natori, Hiiragi, Natsume, and Nyanko-sensei are standing in the wreckage of Natori's spare room after an exorcism. Text post by RoseCrystal reads "should i get my life together or should i just keep being sexy and chaotic"

Image 3: Close-up of Natori's smirking face in profile. Text post by ShirleyTemplar-Blog reads "I may seem like an asshole / but deep down I'm a good person / and even deeper down I'm a bigger asshole"

Image 4: At an udon restaurant, Natori is asking the server if she's seen or heard of anything weird in the area lately. He's posed casually with his chin resting in his hand and has sparkles around him. Text post by ManyWinged reads "*walks into an antique store* i'd like to see your most evil items, please"

Image 5: After a sleepless night, Natori is smiling and posing with sparkles surrounding him. Natsume, sensei, and Hiiragi look on, unimpressed. Text post by jumex reads "Making myself hotter. To cope"

Image 6: Natori is smiling at Natsume, his hand on Natsume's shoulder. Text post by avantegarda reads "I may be an absolute disaster of an adult but when someone younger than me asks for advice I turn into a Wise Professor"

Image 7: Teenage Natori is sitting in his family's storeroom at night, reading. Text post by FuckOffStraightPeople-Blog reads "occupation: the family disappointment"

Image 8: Teenage Natori glares at an offscreen Matoba. Text post reads "when people explain things to me i see red. if i wanted to understand iw ould have understood. leave me alone ."

Image 9: Wearing a bucket hat in an attempt to go incognito, Natori leans against a huge advertisement for his album "Unloved", half of which is a photo of his face. Text post by BPDSuperBoy reads "the lengths i would go to to both get attention and avoid it...astounding"

Image 10: On a poster for one of his movies, a sultry Natori smirks at the viewer, his hand poised to comb through his hair. The lizard youkai is visible on his cheek. Text post by semiotextiana reads "im so sexy and fun and fucking doomed"

/end ID]

BONUS: live teen reaction!

[ID: Watched by a crowd of people, an embarrassed Natsume pushes Natori in front of him. Natori looks serene and is surrounded by a purple cloud of sparkles. Text post by LauraMercierBodyScrub reads "cause of death: second hand embarrassment" /end ID]

sorry for being obsessed with this three-alter-egos-in-a-trenchcoat 20-something big bother figure disaster-ass man. as if it's my fault 🙄

natsuyuu characters as text posts 1/?

[monkey-wrench-zeurel]

Firstly loving the show thus far, got at least 3, maybe more, friends hooked on it so far. And they too, adore the show and have started plotting little theories in their heads.

Secondly I agree wholeheartedly with that one ask who said that Shrike should be the next Tumblr sexy man. Let the funky pizza man have an ego overload.

Be careful what you wish for!

[radi0activesmile]

Under the cut you will find a (somewhat disjointed) essay about my take on the Husk & Alastor scene from episode 5.

The working title is What Alastor did was not okay; however, I do not believe this one scene should be used to describe his typical behavior.

This is not an Alastor did nothing wrong post or a post where I try to make excuses / defend his behavior so I can still feel good about myself while writing him / enjoying him as a character.

I am very much aware that Alastor is, by no means, a good person.

Before you click, keep in mind these are my opinions and my takes. If you see things differently, that's fine. If you want to discuss them, that's also fine, as long as we're all civil adults about this.

Content warning: Racism.

First off, this post was mostly inspired by the peoplf of Twitter shrieking: OMG VIV MADE OUR TUMBLR SEXY MAN JUST AS BAD AS VALENTINO.

Well: They're all in Hell. They are not good people. We can stand around all day discussing if one crime against another person is worse than the other for various reasons, but that's not the purpose of this post.

Now, if you want to scream that Alastor is as physically abusive as Valentino because we saw him do this one thing one time, I disagree, not because I think he's a good person, but because that's just not his style.

Alastor has shown he gets what he wants through convincing people to do what he wants more so than physically forcing them. He said in episode 1 he can make others do as he wills, but we haven't seen him do it. We have seen him offer exchanges rather than force his will on them.

Example: Alastor wanted no part in interacting with television, but rather than demand or force Vaggie to stop trying to make a tv commercial (or to make a radio commercial) he offered her a deal: He'll help if he isn't asked to work with televisions anymore.

Viv once said Alastor is aromantic in the sense that he 'loves himself more than he could ever love anyone else.' The man has an ego, and we saw from his reaction to Carmilla saying she didn't care where he'd been that people not catering to that ego bothers him a lot. And she seems to be the norm rather than the exception. The only people who have acted... 'appropriately' to his return have been; Vox, for having a complete tantrum over it; Vaggie, for treating him like such a threat, and... maybe Pentious.

So, The Radio Demon's been walking around with a chip on his shoulder for five months when two things happen rapid fire:

Lucifer, King of Hell shows up, and (after hugging his daughter and petting some animals) what's the first thing he does?

Finds something Alastor changed and says it's bad, and then starts dismissing him as someone very insignificant. He even hints that the hotel has a good name until he realizes the name was Alastor's idea, and then insults it, and it's that It's a bad idea if it came from you that stomped on his nerve enough to make him say fuck you.

Honestly, at first I thought it was a warning sign that he was about to snap when he said fuck, since he so rarely swears, but he also said pissy in Stayed Gone, and his voice actor admits he did not know Alastor not swearing was a thing.

But swearing or no, Luci's clearly getting under his skin, and that might be because it's something he experienced in life.

Lest we forget, Alastor is mixed race. Born around 1900. In the south.

When he was alive and conducting his radio show, no one would be able to tell his race. There were likely incidents where he said something on the radio that got a positive reaction from people calling in, only to say something similar outside of his radio station and be dismissed because he's... this is tumblr so I'm going to say not white.

When he told Vaggie this face was made for radio that... might have been something a co-worker or a boss said to him in life. Yes, that's a looot of speculation on my part, but considering the time period... and the fact that he seems to say it with some amount of distain.

Alastor also seems to feel very strongly about found family vs blood family, which makes a lot of sense since same sex couples were made illegal in Louisiana (in order to protect white purity or something, I believe that's how the article phrased it?) So, if his father was in his life at all, it wasn't much. For someone who made fun of Charlie for having daddy issues, he looks to be projecting some daddy issues of his own.

Both feelings that are probably exacerbated by someone who actually knew him at the time in his life when he was looked down on and thought of as inferior just... busting right through the front door.

Ps, his eyes narrowing when Mimzy says the word mixed got my attention. Sure, maybe he's just annoyed his friend is so excited to see Lucifer, and, yes, I know she's saying mixed in reference to Lucifer being royalty BUT. He shuts his eyes when she says that word exactly.

I could go on about the racist undertones in the busboy comment and Lucifer's pure angelic power and other friends lines but. Let's talk about Mimzy.

Alastor has been putting up with this woman for over ninety years. He knows why she's here. He's already feeling insulted (both from five months of his ego getting drop kicked and Lucifer's actual insults) and now Husk stops him to tell him to tell him something he already knows.

Viv once said Alastor snaps his neck or breaks his back in order to unsettle people so they'll leave him alone / stop touching him, so if the fuck you wasn't the sign that he was about to snap, him breaking his neck when Husk called out was prooobably the sign that he was about to snap.

Now, yes, you and I both know Husk's just trying to give him a heads up, but Mr. Wounded pride over here seems to be take it like Husk thinks Alastor's too stupid to catch on.

Theeeen...

When Alastor says he can handle it, who in their right minds would cross me (the big, powerful, terrifying radio demon everyone has forgotten I am) Husk.... tells the truth.

A lot of people will try to cross him. He's been gone. They've forgotten him. Vox and Pentious have already tried to cross him, and there were probably more in that five month timeskip. Husk also said no one knows why (except him. Apparently he knows. Meaning Alastor either trusted him enough to let him in on this secret or he was there to witness whatever went down.)

I couldn't read if Husk was implying Alastor tell the others where he went or just trying to remind him his name isn't enough to frighten people anymore. Either way, Alastor cuts him off pretty suddenly because it's evident anyone else knowing is not something he even wants to entertain.

We saw in episode 3 how twitchy he gets when Zestial hints at wanting to know,

(his shifty eyes are too fast for me to catch with a screen grab but that's very telling that he's annoyed / uncomfortable... or Zestial's onto something with that holy arms comment. The fact that Alastor turns away from him when he says this line is also telling to me.)

So, Alastor does what we've seen Alastor do in the past when he's tried to show his power over someone: He gets in their face, touches them, and says things that he knows will bother the person. He's either trying to change the subject from his own powerlessness to Husk's... or just make Husk so angry that Husk doesn't follow him.

And then Husk... does what most in this situation would do: He throws it back.

And Alastor, with his chipped shoulder from five months of being dismissed and disrespected for the last five months, and whatever bad memories / feelings of inferiority Mimzy and Lucifer are stirring up, snaps, and makes one last desperate grab to remind himself that he's powerful, and that, despite being on a leash, despite being owned (like his grandparents likely were) he still has power over something. A once powerful overlord, in fact.

There may have also been some anger / broken trust if Alastor told Husk what was really going on and he thought Husk was threatening to tell the others... maybe.

Now. Does any of that make what Alastor did okay? No. No it does not (then again, they're in Hell. A lot of what they do isn't okay) but I think the people crying out that Alastor is a serial abuser who treats Husk like Valentino treats Angel based on this ONE scene might be jumping the gun a little.

Husk's shocked expression tells me he wasn't expecting that reaction. We saw in the pilot that Alastor usually takes Husk pushing him, defying him, and telling him to fuck off in stride...and just makes Alastor annoy him more.

Also, Husk was okay enough just a few minutes later to stand like ten feet away from Alastor, eat popcorn, and watch him tell off Mimzy (who I could type up a whole ass other essay about.) So... yes, he was shaking in the moment, so, maybe he knows he pushed the trigger button and that, now that Al's gotten to remind everyone why I am here, blow off some steam, feel powerful, and remind everyone what a big bad threat he is, he's going to go back to just being a pain in Husk's ass.

So... calm down please, Twitter.

[waitingformyfavoritesongs]

22 March 2023 Wednesday 12:12 pmpdt

felt a weird twinge of pain I think it was my heart I’m not sure. It could have been acid eating my heart. 12:13 vag acid pain 12:13 pmpdt I was questioning the miñion? Incubus? Whoever was hurting me. I said in my mind maybe you’re the one who did that to Jon benet Ramsey . I think they might have originally said there was sperm? Maybe that’s why the Wikipedia said dna of a man? So I said he’s probably a sick psycho. & then he attacked me. I think that’s an omission of guilt. A heinous one. 12:17 pmpdt at the price of my life.

12:51 pmpdt incubus/miñion think they’re better than everyone even though they probably are the most guilty of doing the dirtiest heinous things in the universe. That’s what an incubus is by definition: a rapist, torturess, murderer. Omission of guilt by historical? Title. Yet, in vehement??? (Def?) denial! DENIAL!!!! 12:54 pmpdt arrogant I find him to be. Twisted caught up in his own maniacal? Ego! EGO! 12:55 pmpdt

12:55 pmpdt with his power he can get away with ANY CRIME! iNCLUDING CHILD RAPE! & torture! & murder! A narcissist he is to the worse degree!!!! 12:56 pmpdt

12:58 pmpdt I think tumblr deleted all my sexy boy followers... throat acid pain 12:59 pmpdt oh I’m not all powerful all seeing all knowing omniscient? Of course I only know what YOU did to me what you HAVE BEEN CAPABLE of. So should I extrapolate??? (Def?) 1 pm pdt should I hypothesize????? Educated GUESS???? 1:01 pmpdt do I have FREE SPEECH or does it come at a price????? Bcz free = should mean no price no cost! Right? But it comes at a cost at incubus’ will! Heinous. Piece of *********** <- I can’t decide on a word. 1:02 pmpdt

1:03 pmpdt I spelled bot. Incubus controlled the autocorrect. Bot was changed to not in previous sentence. 😑 1:04 pmpdt

1:04 pmpdt sexy bot followers. 1:05 pmpdt

1:05 pmpdt I updated the previous post on about high school dances. They playing a lot of psychological games. Incubus mentioned reverse psychology stuff to me. Example of it is if you know him to be demon lord, & then he posts that men should not make laws about women bodies you know he’s playing games. Omission of guilt! Am I using omission right? I pick up these words from tv & readings. 1:08 pmpdt

1:09 pmpdt my aunt relied on my mom a lot all her life. My mom said she used to ditch everyone when they had to do chores to hang out with other kids to have fun. & even as an adult when she needed stuff like get tires changed she had to hold her hand & take her to a place to get it done like Costco. & that’s how she chooses to be. 1:11 pmpdt she’s going to make excuses like that she’s this or that. Do you think she really cared my mom had no time for fun at all even when she was a kid? She had to be a mom & accountant when she was 7 years old. 1:13 pmpdt does that make someone happy? She had to gather fire wood & do laundry in a river. They didn’t always have electricity. She had to go to school & correct everyone’s homework. Aunt that weird? Teachers made the top students do that work but I believe her. 1:15 pmpdt my aunt is selfish & greedy. 1:15 pmpdt

1:15 pmpdt my aunt will probably give all the credit to god that my mom ever helped her. She will probably say that Bcz incubus says that. Incubus didn’t do the laundry in the river. But incubus & aunty will probably justify it anyway they want. 1:16 pmpdt heinous b*txhes. 1:17 pmpdt

2:04 pmpdt *ain’t that weird? Not aunt...

2:05 pmpdt so, if he tests me, how do you know he don’t use the same technique to harvest artistic ideas from me to steal? Bcz you know what they say: great artist steal! 2:07 am pdt

2:08 pmpdt bcz child rape happened how do you know he did not have the curiosity to try it himself & get addicted? It probably happened to Jon benet Ramsey & it happened to dugard. They had children. 2:10 pmpdt

2:10 pmpdt a lot of things in this world don’t make sense. If you think about it. But sh*t happened. Bcz it happened, I HAVE to question it. Behati still looked like a child in her jean pants when they first started dating. How do you know that he’s not attracted to 11 year olds? 12 year olds? 13 year olds? 14 year olds? Romeo & Juliet Shakespeare. Someone said Juliet was most likely 13 or 14 years old. If a play is based on a character that young, is that a reflection of reality? Art imitating life? 2:14 pmpdt

2:15 pmpdt likes to inflict pain stinging probably acid pain on my lips. I’m not lying about what I heard. Bcz stuff happened I need to consider all the possibilities & figure out the reasons. 2:17 pmpdt bcz p*nis likes a vag it can feel so if it likes that it probably likes something that fits like a glove. A tight seal. Virgin seal. 2:18 pmpdt bcz I need to consider that at least some men are like animals, & vicious & heinous... I need to draw my own conclusions. 2:19 pmpdt

2:29 pmpdt so there is no mission. It’s made up Bcz everyone is wicked. If they already knew what I was going to be & keep me as a zombie for 99.8% of my life with very controlled minimal testing... forgot my point... they already knew what I was going to be, I’m here for the heinous people to torture. Bcz they enjoy it 24/7. 2:32 pmpdt all it is is for capitalism. For heinous torture. 2:33 pmpdt if incubus is god then god is heinous & likes torture. It makes him happy & smile. Nothing puts a bigger smile on his face even though he probably felt no pain from those tattoos. He’s probably never felt pain in his life. Life is good for incubus. Incubus is a liar 24/7. He lied to me about marriage & children & love. How do you know what his limits are? No limits probably. 2:36 pmpdt why do you think he makes his voice sound like a castrated angel? Bcz he wants to rape children? Women like deeper voices for a man when they are older. But when they are younger they will probably be tricked into false security with that voice. 2:38 2:39 pmpdt

2:39 pmpdt I will never believe in incubus again. There are no limits to his lies. He is probably a child rapist. 2:40 pmpdt

2:42 pmpdt I saw that Courtney Scott’s ex probably works for the r*iders fo*tball team? In Las Vegas. 2:43 pmpdt

2:43 pmpdt don’t trust incubus. If Scott & incubus are bros, he probably rapes Courtney. 2:44 pmpdt

2:45 pmpdt nicolatian crap.

2:49 pmpdt YouTube

/watch?v=4t5gXccZw6l

should be story book reading of everyone poops

i or L that last letter. 2:51 pmpdt

there’s nothing to fight for Bcz everyone is wicked/evil. But I was made to care enough to stop a little boy white toddler from running out of a tall frys electronics store with stairs & a king ramp escalator? Outside. When I was with my friend. 2:53 pmpdt when I was 19 years old. 2:54 pmpdt

2:55 pmpdt the incubus changed king to king. LONG. Damn you! Stop using auto correct. Keeps using reverse psychology crap on me. acid pain throat. He uses it as an excuse to hurt me. Heinous b*tch. If women were evil how do babies survive before incubus!? Heinous b*tch! 2:58 pmpdt

2:59 pmpdt men have no alibi there. All polygamous who like to abandon pregnant women. Probably have to rely on grandmas. 3 pmpdt

3:04 pmpdt borrow born to run in paper & audiobook. You’ll hear probably about tarahumara women who run/walk & probably I think I remember they’re always on the move. Labor is probably easy for them & they keep on going. 3:06 pmpdt

3:07 pmpdt all I see now thanks to incubus are that men are selfish heinous animals polygamous with side chicks are many lies lying about love and are addicted to only s*x & will look for any easy hole to stick their p*nis into. American pie movie with pies. Dildos sun lamb pens in ag high school farms probably to test it b4 doing it. 3:10 pmpdt

3:11 pmpdt dildos in. Not sun.

3:13 pmpdt and they’re probably smart w/ big heads = probably big brains. They probably spend all day thinking of which hole to stick their p*nis into next & how to not get caught (acid throat pain back of left skull pain).

A3:16 pmpdt incubus made me type A. Reverse psychology after incubus/miñion hurt my gum tooth dientes = die in test. Spanish for teeth. 3:18 pmpdt if incubus is Jesus Jesus does not love you. They wanted me to believ last year? 2021? 2021. That the Bible apocalypse is reverse psychology to rub it in my face that I’m dying. And there’s no resurrection. Now they want to type 316 Bcz of the Bible. 😫😑😩 NO. You cannot convince me anymore. 3:21 pmpdt

3:23 pmpdt I don’t want that heinous lying man near me.

[theyanderespecialist]

Base Yandere Adam Headcanons: The First Yandere (Hazbin Hotel)

[Hello, My Sexy Muffins! I am here finally with a new chapter! This one is Adam from Hazbin Hotel! He is a yandere so good luck, I hope you all enjoy this chapter here!] 

(Disclaimer: Adam is not yandere in canon! This is just for fun and not to be taken seriously at all Simping for fictional characters and yanderes is fine! Just do not be illegal or gross about it! also, remember to separate fiction from reality and headcanon from canon! Yanderes are not ideal partners to have in real life!) 

-Base Yandere Headcanons With Adam From Hazbin Hotel- 

.Adam oh man is he an egotistical man, and for you, the person he is in love with man oh man is his ego huge when it comes to him being the best for you? 

.If you are an AMAB and or masc presenting he sees you as the second-best man right behind him. 

.If you are an AFAB and or Fem presenting he is a bit more sexist with you and keeps his lady in line 

(Okay this is a disclaimer from the Queen in which I will HAVE To do small videos of male listener and female listener with him because he treats those two VASTLY differently so this is for SURE His very base yandere self) (Anyways back to gender neutral) 

.All in all, you are the only one worthy enough to be his new spouse 

.And you are damn lucky that he decided to have you as his spouse, do you know how many women and MEN would want to be with him. 

.He is the first man, he has the first dick! you should be on your knees worshiping him in more than one way! 

.He is also a narcissist and would remind you a lot that you are nothing without him, he is going to break you down, to build you up. 

.Making you the perfect partner to be with him and for him to worship the ground he walks on and get to work serving him. 

.He would deal with rivals (Okay another side not from me as the Queen I have to do also different listeners/Readers like in which one is an angel and another is a sinner and so forth, so if you want to see that comment what you want to see!) again he would mainly deal with rivals by first off mocking them and then unaliving them. 

.He does not care if they are seraphim or if they are hellborns. 

.You are his and ANYONE who gets in the way of stealing you is going to suffer. 

.He is a type of yandere that loses his shit fast and starts lashing out. 

.He thinks he is a cool man and a dick master but break him down he is just a frat boy kind of man that thinks he is better than anyone else. 

.He would confess to you and try and swoon you. 

.If you say yes, as long as he is in charge you will be treated like royalty HIS royalty 

.If you say no? He is going to get so pissy and possessive and aggressive 

.He will try and make you jealous by dating me and women to make you jealous. 

.If that does not work he will straight up kidnap you and make you his without a care of how you felt. 

.If he gets really desperate he might steal some love potion from hell to make you love him. 

.He does not care what he has to do or what boundary he has to cross you will be his, heaven be damned! 

[Anyways! Another chapter is done! I hope you all enjoyed this and if you want to see more specific Adamn yandere below Comment what you like to see UNLESS you see this on Tumblr then put your request in MY ASK BOX thank you and stay sexy all of my sexy muffins!] 

[spideypoolbigbang]

SPBB 2020 Masterlist

Title: All Cats are Grey in the Dark 

 Author: mayatheyellowbee 

 Artist: Cheermione 

 Rating: Explicit 

 Warnings: Graphic Depictions of Violence 

 Word Count: 28,511 

Summary: Peter is a Witcher, hired to kill Deadpool, another monster hunter gone rogue. But when he meets his target, he realizes there is more behind Deadpool’s recent killing spree than what he’s been led to believe. Despite their diverging opinions on the subject of murder, they have to put their differences aside to face a monster far worse - and more human - than any they’ve ever fought before.

Fic Masterpost | Art Masterpost

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Title: The Past, the Present, and the (im)Possible Future

Author: Jennicide — AO3 and Tumblr

Artist: WaterMe — AO3 and Tumblr

Rating: Mature

Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply

Word Count: 44,833

Summary: Peter B. Parker drops back into his crapshoot reality after a little detour to an alternate universe. He thinks he might have finally figured out how to make it work again with MJ, but he forgets that there’s still that infamous ‘Parker Luck’ to contend with. (Un)Fortunately for him, there’s a totally available Deadpool on his side of the multiverse who’s been waiting years for a chance to pick him up!

Fic Masterpost | Art Masterpost

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Title: A Year in the Gallery

Author: Princess_Breetlejuice

Artist: TheLazyDrawer

Rating: Explicit

Warnings: Graphic Depictions of Violence

Word Count: 43,579

Summary: Wade is kidnapped by a strange man who has a very peculiar job offer. While he’s skeptical, the man promises to compensate Wade very generously for the use of his body. Sounds [sketch], but Wade is all for easy money, and it’s not like he has anything better to do right now.

And really, what’s the worst that can happen?

(Or: Peter is an immortal sex demon with a penchant for sadism, and Wade is about to learn he can endure unimaginable agony with a smile.)

Fic Masterpost | Art Masterpost

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Title: Anchored 

Author: @jolinarjackson​

Artist: @violettavonviolet 

Rating: Mature

Warnings: Implied/referenced homicide, implied/referenced character death 

Word Count: 34,999

Summary: In a world in which Empaths are common and their gifts considered useful, Peter, as an Empath, is an outsider because his gift is irreversibly broken. Unable to initiate physical contact with anyone, Peter lives isolated and is forced to keep the few people in his life at a distance. His only escape is going out on patrol as Spider-Man and the friendship he developed with Deadpool as his alter ego. Peter’s life changes dramatically when he and Deadpool accidentally touch, resulting in an unexpected Empathic bond that goes against everything Peter knows about his Broken Empathy. While trying to figure out what exactly is going on between them, Peter and Wade also join forces to stop a serial killer who seems to have taken up residence in New York, unaware that Spider-Man is one of his intended targets.

Fic Masterpost | Art Masterpost

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Title: When We’re 40

Author: doctoring (AO3)

Artist: Chez (Tumblr)

Rating: Teen

Warnings: No AO3 Warnings Apply

Word Count: 61,241

Summary: Peter B. Parker returns from the multiverse to find out that Mary Jane has moved on and is engaged to be married. Feeling that he’s been left behind in life, Peter agrees to a marriage pact with Wade, mainly just to get his dinner back that Wade’s been holding hostage. The deal sets the two men off on a year-long journey of navigating their feelings for each other and what a ‘significant other’ really means. Eventually, they both realize that they don’t want just a silly little marriage pact, but something more real and meaningful with each other. Too bad they’re not the best with admitting their feelings.

Fic Masterpost | Art Masterpost

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Title: Sympathy for the Hurricane

Author: meinposhbastard (AO3, tumblr)

Artist: thatbanananana (tumblr)

Rating: Teen

Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply

Word Count: 27,702

Summary: Peter has never been more scared in his entire life. He’s on the run, and the last place he should take refuge in is the Trenches, the deepest and most dangerous place of the Atlantic Ocean. But he’s desperate. If they catch him, it will be the end of him. The Monster of the Trenches is a creature that has been in numerous wars and has lived for a thousand years (or so the folk tales say). Peter has grown up with them, among others; this monster is that old. So Peter expects something big and formless and dark and maybe hungry for siren flesh. What Peter finds is a merman full of scars, a tragic past befitting them, and kindness.

Fic Masterpost | Art Masterpost

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Title: Don’t You Dare Forget the Sun

Author: Klaus

Artist: Zet

Rating: Explicit

Warnings: Major Character Death, Angst, torture, blood and gore, experimentation, psychological torture, established relationship, canon typical violence and language.

Word Count: 12,382

Summary:

“Cold white walls, keep you from your pad and pen 

You just wanna stab again 

I can’t believe it’s half this hard You never knew your mind was dark, no!“ 

Peter Parker, self-proclaimed superhero and honestly a nice guy, finds himself locked within the confines of a top-secret definitely not legal medical facility. Maybe it was the kicks to his head, or possibly the chains that kept him hogtied in the back of the vehicle, or even the horrible experimentation was done to his body but something tells him that he is in a No Good Very Bad Place. 

Not that he can really feel much of the pain anymore. He didn’t realize he was falling perfectly in place for these doctors’ nefarious plans and now he can’t think much of anything anymore. He’s following orders. He’s here for Shield, right? The doctors tell him he’s doing good. He’s amazing. He’s Their perfect soldier and Peter can’t help but say yes to everything asked of him.

Fic Masterpost | Art Masterpost

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Title: Your Friendly Neighbourhood Deadpool

Author: Nimohtar ( AO3 | Tumblr )

Artist: Princesseellie3 ( Instagram | Tumblr )

Rating: Explicit

Warnings: No Major Warnings Apply.

Word Count: 42,873

Summary: When Aunt May moves to the small town of Berry Hill, MA for a new job, Peter doesn’t anticipate things will change too much in his own life. That is, until he meets the town’s self-proclaimed leather-wearing, katana-wielding local hero, a.k.a Your Friendly Neighbourhood Deadpool…

A story told in snapshots of holidays, where strangers become friends, and then something more.

Fic Masterpost | Art Masterpost

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Title: To You

Co-Authors: AnGoose — AO3 and Tumblr; Y_ellow — AO3 and Tumblr

Artist: PastaPapi — AO3 and Twitter and Tumblr

Betas: Atem — AO3 and Tumblr; Water — AO3 and Tumblr

Rating: Mature

Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply

Word Count: 13,653

Summary: Deadpool’s quest to make best friends with Spider-Man is a strange and convoluted thing, made all the more complicated by the letters he keeps finding in his safehouse. They’re all addressed to “Ben, Love Peter.” And they’re all just a little too on the nose regarding Spidey’s personal problem of the month. Wade isn’t going to say no to a little extra insight into how to woo his very best Spider-Friend, though.

Or, five times someone mistakes Wade’s crummiest safehouse as a post office, and one time Wade plays the sexy-mailman part in this (emotional) porno and hand delivers a letter to Spider-Man.

Fic Masterpost | Art Masterpost

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Title: Lost in a Shadow of You

Author: @lunastories​ (AO3)

Artist: @ah-geee​

Rating: Explicit

Warnings: No Major Archive Warnings Apply

Word Count: 34,514

Summary: Peter always suspected he’d be a shitty fisherman, but after some rather unfortunate events in New York force him to be a recluse in a secluded coastal town, he can say for certain he sucks at this. Fortunately for him, the resident cryptid, one Siren known as Wade Wilson, is around to save him from himself. Misunderstandings and shenanigans ensue when Peter’s ‘thank you for saving my life’ gifts are mistaken as ‘please have babies with me’ courting gifts by the Siren. Only time (and some low-key therapy) will decide if they figure their shit out.

This is a story of two monsters who despite all the odds, find a home in each other.

Fic Masterpost | Art Masterpost 1, 2

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Title: Heatwave

Author: TimidTurnip [Ao3 | Tumblr]

Artist: VictoryThorn [Instagram | Tumblr]

Rating: E

Warnings: No Major Archive Warnings Apply

Word Count: 16,911K

Summary: Peter can handle anything life decides to throw his way. He didn’t freak out at all when Wade professed his love, the heat wave isn’t turning him into a puddle of goo and he’s totally got a firm grasp on his finances. And Wade… he just wants to know why Peter won’t date him, even if he has to push a few boundaries to find out.

Fic Masterpost | Art Masterpost

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Title: Snippets Through Time

Author: Lalapaya | Tumblr: @manyfandomsnotime​

Artist: 343EnderSpark | Tumblr: @343EnderSpark

Rating: Teen

Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply

Word Count: 9,668

Summary: Peter Parker has to face the normal tumultuous daily routine of being the only child of a famous billionaire philanthropist and a historic icon. The one to help him through this is his best friend and partner in crime Wade Wilson. But what to do if this said friend suddenly becomes the target of affection?

A few excerpts of Peter Parker’s life growing up with Wade Wilson as his best friend and Iron Man and Captain America as his fathers.

Fic Masterpost  | Art Masterpost

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Title: Nothing Gold Can Stay

Author: cheekysstyles (tumblr)

Artist: aquamerryne (insta)

Rating: M

Warnings: Author Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings

Word Count: 30k

Summary: A year and a half ago, sixteen year old gymnastics prodigy Peter Parker left in the middle of the World Championship competition, costing Team USA a chance at a medal. After one too many run-ins with the law, Peter gets an ultimatum: return to the sport he left behind or end up in juvenile detention.

When he arrives at X-Force Gymnastics, an elite gym owned by Wade Wilson, Peter is unprepared to rediscover his love for the sport and to confront the very thing that made him quit in the first place.

Fic Masterpost | Art Masterpost

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Title: A Mate Most Begrudging 

 Author: Vixen13 (Twitter) 

 Artist: Gensyz 

Rating: Explicit 

Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply 

Word Count: 46,189

Summary: It’s the height of the Gilded Age in America where everyone is searching for a new life and a new fortune from booming industry to the colonization of the wild frontier. Wade Wilson is a disgraced alpha trapped in the in-between of east and west, high society and labor, recluse and shunned. Though he’s convinced himself that he’s just fine on his own, others are more than happy to meddle in his perfectly quiet life before he loses his grip on reality more than he already has.

Peter Parker is a down on his luck omega who needs money fast. Knowing that laying tracks is a quick ticket to a short life, he let himself be talked into joining the mail order omega program. He’s careful about the alpha he chooses and determined to carve out a life for himself with a handsome stranger. But the shock of his alpha’s appearance is nothing compared to the slamming of the door in his face as Wade declares he has no intention of mating with anyone, especially not some gold-digging omega tart.

Fic Masterpost | Art Masterpost

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Title: Three Steps to Inferno

Author: @waterme-stories (Ao3)

Artist: @atemy (Ao3)

Rating: Explicit

Warnings: Graphic Depictions of Violence

Word Count: 31,399k

Summary: On August 26th, 1934, Gwen Stacy brushed past the doorman at the Ritz-Carlton, walked into the dining room, and set herself on fire.

With the city plunged into pandemonium, I didn’t think twice before I hit the pavement: both as private eye Peter Benjamin Parker, and behind the scenes as The Spider, New York City’s most notorious vigilante. The criminal underworld cowered at the sound of my name and the shadow of my webs — but there were some parts of the Big Apple’s seedy underbelly that I couldn’t begin to imagine…

(A Spideypool Noir Mystery)

Fic Masterpost | Art Masterpost

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Title: Mutable Materials 

Author: @ciceqi (AO3) 

Artist: @nhrive (AO3) 

Rating: Mature 

Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply; warnings for Temporary Character Death, Suicide, Insectophobia 

Word Count: 12,853

Summary: Ever since the field trip that hijacked everything from Peter’s genetic profile to his daemon’s shape, he’s had to hide his entirely-too-recognizable daemon from the world.  He doesn’t expect to come across a man with an embarrassment of daemons, or maybe…no daemon at all.  Is Deadpool as delusional as everyone thinks?  He’s certainly been helpful, but how long can that last if his reality hinges on the existence of a daemon no one’s seen in years? 

Fic Masterpost | Art Masterpost

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Title: A Dream is a Wish Your Heart Makes

Author: @mscaptainwinchester​

Artist: cottonclover

Rating: Teen

Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply, Canonical Character Death, Physical Abuse (Alluded To), Emotional/Psychological Abuse

Word Count: 21,551

Summary: This is the Disney Cinderella AU no one asked for. In a faraway kingdom, in a comfortable cottage in a comfortable village, Peter Parker grew up with two wonderful parents who loved him very much. And then those parents died, and he was left to life with his stepmother Liv, and her two terrible children, Jessica and Eugene. His happy home turned into an unhappy life of servitude with no end in sight.

An invitation to a Royal Ball reminds Peter of a long-dead wish to see the palace his mother told him stories of, and he becomes determined to attend despite the protests of his miserable family. With the help of his new fairy godmother, a little bit of magic, and a whole lot of hard work, his dreams of visiting the palace and finding his very own Prince Charming will come true. Or will they?*

*They totally will. What kind of Cinderella story do you think this is?

Fic Masterpost | Art Masterpost

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Title: Thanks for the Memories

Author: Actionpackedlips

Artist: Moemai

Rating: Explicit

Warnings: Graphic Depictions of Violence, Sexual Content, Canon Divergence

Word Count: 50,461

Summary: What if Mysterio never outed Peter?

Deadpool comes back from a mission to find his favorite Spider-Man, his only Spider-Man, the boxes so helpfully remind him, missing. Specifically, kidnapped. Mysterio’s remaining crew were brimming with the need for revenge after their leader’s death, and so they vowed to use updated B.A.R.F tech to learn Spider-Man’s specific superpowers in order to harness it for themselves; another failed attempt to continue Mysterio’s grandiose plans of becoming the best superhero ever. With the help of the Avengers Peter is found, connected to a device not even Tony has full comprehension of.

Deadpool valiantly volunteers to be hooked up; death was a regularly scheduled program for him, after all. He’d guide Spider-Man to a subconscious level that was safe to be extracted from, and (total bonus!) hopefully win his favor as Spidey’s knight in shiny leather! But once Deadpool enters, his deepest, darkest, repressed memories are on display for him and his friendly neighborhood spider to see. Deadpool fears not only what Spider-Man will think of him after it all, after everything he sees, but just what he’ll have to relive in order to rescue the man who not-so-secretly holds his heart.

Fic Masterpost  |  Art Masterpost

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Title: Paradise Awaits

Author: bisexualbarry

Artist: doctoring

Rating: Mature

Warnings: canon typical violence, minor character death

Word Count: 32k

Summary: “For those who prove worthy, paradise awaits…”

Fifteen years after assuming his childhood best friend died, jaded treasure hunter Peter Parker comes out of an early retirement when Wade Wilson comes back into his life. Now fully scarred and clearly hiding secrets, Wade drags Peter back into the thrill of searching for legendary pirate Captain Henry Avery’s lost treasure.

Fighting for their life from the Shoreline mercenaries chasing after them, Peter and Wade continue the dangerous search of a pirate treasure worth 400 million, at least. It’s too bad their ex-partner, Harry Osborn, wants them dead to take the treasure all for himself.

Fic Masterpost | Art Masterpost

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Title: Ducks!

Author(s): Devral

Artist: LordAvon

Rating: Teen

Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply

Word Count: 7,994

Summary: After a fight with Peter, Wade goes stomping through Central Park. He stumbles upon something extremely unexpected. He’s not ready to be a mama!

Fic Masterpost |  Art Masterpost

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Title: Puppy ex Machina

Author: riseofthefallenone ( Tumblr | Ao3 )

Artist: Jennicide ( Tumblr | Ao3 )

Rating: Explicit

Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply

Word Count: 83,044

Summary: A year after his divorce, Peter is trapped in a depressive cycle and still not quite over Mary Jane. When she shows up at his door, begging him to watch her dog for a week while she leaves town, he can’t really bring himself to say “no”. No one was expecting that little Pomeranian to turn his life around and help him realize that his friendship with Wade has been teetering on the edge of something more for a while.

Fic Masterpost  | Art Masterpost

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Title: The Fourth Wall

Author: RansomNotes (Ao3)

Artist: thelazyartist (Ao3)

Rating: Mature

Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply

Word Count: 13k

Summary: Between college and his side jobs and his alter-ego, Peter barely has the time to sleep at his apartment, let alone spend any time hanging out there, which works out since it’s a cheap and empty and depressing apartment, now that he and Ned aren’t roommates on-campus anymore. So hearing his rude loudmouth neighbor through the wall all the time shouldn’t matter much, except it’s classic Parker to somehow make friends with the crazy guy next door, to the point he’s actually sad to leave his crummy apartment. But Peter seems to have a real penchant for bad company, since he’s spending all his free time with someone he’s never seen, only heard through the wall, and spending most of his patrolling time with someone else crazy, since Deadpool showed up recently and somehow monopolized his time as Spider-Man. It’s probably just a phase. Everybody goes through a fall-catastrophically-hard-for-separate-but-unavailable-people phase, right?

Fic Masterpost  |  Art Masterpost

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Title: In Which Peter Finds Hope

Author: ladyamante (AO3)

Artist: Areon (tumblr)

Rating: Mature

Warnings: Canon-typical violence, sexual content, Past child abuse

Word Count: 62,245

Summary: Peter just wants to relax after last year. He hit a rough patch, and Deadpool helped him get through the worst of it. After identity reveals, therapy, and a few explosions, things have finally started to settle down for them both.

But just as Peter’s getting into the swing of things, a strange man with a metal arm shows up claiming to be a time-traveller. He says Peter is the only one who can help him save mutant kind.

Peter finds himself pulled from his home and dragged through different dimensions as he and Cable search for the key to their survival. Meanwhile, they keep running into different versions of Peter’s boyfriend. It seems that everything connects back to Wade. Cable thinks it’s just a coincidence, but Peter is sure there’s a deeper reason behind it all.

Fic Masterpost  | Art Masterpost

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Title: Whether By Accident or By Design 

Author: crookedswingset 

Artist: thelonebamf 

Rating: Explicit 

Warnings: Graphic Violence, Temporary Major Character Death (Wade), Sexual Content, Cannibalistic Symbiotes, Blood and Injury, Secret Identity, Body Horror

Word Count: 188K 

Summary: Peter is about to graduate college and become an officially licensed Pro Hero. Too bad he’s already burnt out. Years of operating as an illegal vigilante with a supposedly subpar Quirk will do that to you. But just as he’s about to quit altogether, he meets actual Pro Hero Deadpool, a reformed villain who works hard to make sure others don’t follow in his footsteps. Despite this achievement, Wade’s just as jaded as he is and has completely given up on making things better.

As their relationship deepens, Peter realizes he is not quite ready to give up on being a Pro Hero, a resolve that is tested when a new Pro Hero agency comes to town and takes over. The so-called “Guard” is a group of four eight-foot men with eerily similar Quirks—and they have no intention of making nice with New York City’s friendly neighborhood Spider-Man.

Fic Masterpost | Art Masterpost

[big-city-dreamer]

Strawberries & Cream

A/N: Hi! So I’m finally back with the follow up to my first fic.😄I had such wholesome hopes for this but I seemed to have unintentionally taken a sharp turn into Smutville🙈 Kudos to anyone who writes this on a regular because the whole process was like pulling teeth🙃 My real-life friends who proofread for me will forever be scarred and they won’t let me live it down lol😅. I’m hoping my Tumblr peeps are more forgiving. I don’t think it’s *that* bad but we’ll see. So I hope you enjoy! Apologies in advance if you need to bleach your eyeballs after! 🤣🤦🏾‍♀️Feedback is welcome as always.💜

Read Part 1 here: Sweet Surprise

Title: Strawberries & Cream (Part 2)

Pairing: Darcy Lewis x Steve Rogers

Summary: Steve and Darcy’s date doesn’t entirely go as planned.

Rating: Explicit. NSFW under the cut 🔞

Warnings: Smut. Absolute filth🙈. PWF. Fingering. Squirting. Cursing. Attempt at humour. Very little plot lol (It’s supposedly super intense y’all⚠️)

Steve should have known that things were going a little too well.

He arrived at Darcy’s SoHo kitchen promptly at 6 pm and was immediately put to work on the frostings for the blueberry-lemonade and blood orange cupcakes. He was the perfect gentleman while they worked, only flexing his biceps when he caught her staring. Needless to say, he had no problem how frequently that happened.

With the SUV Steve borrowed from Tony’s collection at the Tower, they dropped off the cupcakes a few blocks away and headed back to Brooklyn for dinner. Cheeseburgers and strawberry milkshakes with knees brushing under the table at the diner near the docks, turned into strolling on the pier holding hands and heated kisses at the lookout over the water. Until Darcy announced with a naughty glint in her eye that she was ready for dessert.

She sighed happily as she smoothed her hands over his sculpted chest. She pinched one of his pink nipples and he jumped. “God bless America. I’ve been thinking about motorboating these all day.”

She sighed happily as she smoothed her hands over his sculpted chest. She pinched one of his pink nipples and he jumped. “God bless America. I’ve been thinking about motorboating these all day.”

Steve promptly choked. He couldn’t have heard her right. “D-Darcy, I-”

“No need to get your super-soldier briefs in a bunch,” she assured Steve huskily. He was left spluttering as her fingers followed the happy trail of dark blonde hair down his rock hard abs. She got up to take off her charcoal cardigan and burgundy cami and wriggled out of her black leggings. “You’ll get a turn too.”

At the sight of Darcy in a skimpy thong and just short of spilling out of a sexy lace bra, Steve’s brain short-circuited. Darcy knew the black number with appliqué details did nothing to support her fantastic tits and she was a little conscious of her soft tummy. But the hungry look in Steve’s eyes did everything for her ego.

“Beautiful,” he whispered as he pulled her back to him.

She straddled his thighs and rolled her hips against his. Her grin widened at the feel of his covered length pressed incessantly under her bare cheek. “Is that a spatula in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?”

Steve stifled a chuckle as he silenced her with a kiss. He was starting to think she was trying to kill him. If he had the heart of a regular centenarian, his pacemaker would be on the fritz. But what a way to go!

The sudden upbeat ringing of Steve’s cellphone echoed through the apartment, over their panting and kissing. Steve fastidiously ignored it in favour of sucking on the soft spot behind Darcy’s right ear, which left her mewling. It was quickly becoming his new favourite sound.

Neither of them paid any mind to the ringing of Darcy’s phone a few seconds after his stopped. The screaming roar of Black Sabbath seemed a distant hum as Steve ground his crotch against the rapidly dampening spot on Darcy’s panties, much to her delight.

But at the unmistakable tone of his communicator vibrating off the table, Steve groaned, burying his face in Darcy’s neck. “Fuck.”

“We’re getting there, soldier.” She quipped, giggling when he retaliated with a nibble on her ear lobe. He sighed as the beeping stopped but he knew it wouldn’t be the end of it.

“Steve?” Darcy pulled back to catch her breath and get a better look at his face in the little moonlight illuminating the dark apartment. She took no small amount of pride in how botched he looked. She could barely see the ocean-blue ring around his dilated pupils. The rosy flush from his cheeks extended to his muscled chest.

She ran her fingers through his dishevelled dark blonde hair, fingernails scratching his scalp in an attempt to soothe the tension coursing through his body. “It’s a mission, isn’t it?”

Steve closed his eyes and nodded. “Yeah. I’m sorry, Darce.”

“It’s okay. Really!” She added when he shot her a disbelieving look. Still stroking his hair, Darcy gave him a sad smile.

“It was going to happen eventually, Steve,” she admitted. “Look, I may not be involved right now but I’m not a regular civilian. I know what reality is like for you and I can accept it.” She kissed him chastely. “Now, the sooner you go out there and be Captain America, the sooner you can come back here and be Steve Rogers with me.”

His heart squeezed at her words. He pulled her close to him again and kissed her forehead. “Thank you, doll.”

They traded a few more kisses before his cellphone started up again. This time he answered on the first ring. “Rogers.”

“Sorry to ruin your date night, old man,” Tony began, “but we have a situation. Your balls will have to stay blue a little longer-“

“Tony,” Steve warned as Darcy snorted.

“-Or you could make it a quickie.” Tony ploughed on, Sam and Bucky cackling in the background. “Either way, we’re coming to get you. ETA 15 minutes.”

Steve let his head drop against Darcy’s collarbone in defeat as he hung up the phone. He really needed new friends.

“Rain check?” Darcy suggested. The undertones of disappointment in her voice strengthened Steve’s resolve to make it up to her. Captain America- and more importantly Steve- did not break his promises.

In an effortless show of strength, he manhandled her to lie horizontally across his lap. Her squeal at the sudden movement turned into a moan, as he parted her legs and rubbed her nub through the damp thong.

“Steve!” Darcy gasped, eyes flickering between his and watching his fingers work as she clung to him. “We don’t have the time! They’ll be here in 15!”

”I’ve always got a plan, Darce,” he assured. “This is Plan B. And I’ll only need 10.”

Steve groaned as he peeled off her panties to find her dripping. He ran his fingers from the neatly trimmed triangle of hair above her pussy to her glistening lips. “Sweetheart. You’re soaked.”

Blushing, Darcy bit her lip. “I’m a gusher.”

“A wha…?”

Steve blamed it on the lack of blood flow to his brain but it took him a few moments to understand exactly what she meant. His eyes darkened and she shivered. “Oh.”

With his right hand, he gently rubbed wide circles around her little pearl, spreading the moisture. Darcy writhed with pleasure as she held her knees apart to give him better access. Both moaned when he sunk two fingers into her tight, hot hole, sliding in easily up to his knuckles. She jolted as he pinched her nipple with his other hand.

“So sensitive, Darce,” He whispered against her temple as he began thrusting his fingers in earnest. “Let me hear you.”

Darcy can’t help but chuckle in disbelief. He was so smooth with his filthy mouth. Steve may have seemed like a sweet innocent lamb on the outside but here in the dark, he was definitely a wolf ready to devour her.

In no time at all, she was trembling on his fingers with a gasp, arousal spilling down her creamy thighs and onto his jeans. Feeling the build-up of pressure as she squeezed him, he pulled out his fingers and was rewarded with a powerful gush.

“That’s it,” he praised. He returned to steadily rubbing her clit even as she tried to squirm away from his touch. The friction of her ass wriggling against his cock was delicious but he needed to focus on her for a little while longer. He sucked a mark on the side of her neck, toying with her nipple again. “Give me one more, sweetheart. One more. Cum for me.”

This time Darcy screamed as the orgasm ripped through her, squirting onto the couch below them. Her wails had him cumming with a grunt in his jeans not too long after. He kissed her deeply, holding her close.

Reduced to a boneless puddle of pleasure, Darcy purred contentedly as Steve scooped her up and took her to his bedroom, where he laid her on the bed. With a warm washcloth, he cleaned her up before jumping into the shower to quickly rinse himself. He was suited up, cowl in hand, with a minute and a half to spare.

He knelt down to brush the curls away from her face. “I want nothing more than to climb in and cuddle with you, Darce but I’ll be back as soon as I can.”

She yawned when he kissed her forehead, halfway to dreamland and melting into his sheets. “We’re gonna have to work on Plan A when you get back,” she mumbled.

“Yes ma'am,” Steve hummed in agreement. She was definitely going to kill him.

——————

Temp Tags: (Hopefully you want to read it 😬🙈) @chris-evans-indian-fanfic @night-of-the-living-shred @jtargaryen18 @navybrat817 @cilinarc @stargazingfangirl18 @marvelbrat @typhoidmeri

[sortavibing]

hi tumblr bastard

hello bastard man tis i

slut.

yes that is my name now refer me as such

i am 5"3 but with shoes on i am a great big man

i am very sexy with big boobies and a great big badonadonk.

i think i am hilarious with a lot of sex appeal and i am very v3ery cool.

i have no friends but that is okay because i am so attractive that it makes up for my loneliness 

my pronouns are she/her but ill be anything 4 u bbygorl

my hobbies are making fun of my one friend (you) and making them angry bc they aare very smelly and hate me

i am an entj meaning i have 4 letters that tell me i am cool and i am a capricorn meaning people make fun of me by calling me a caprisun

anyways yes tell me what fictional 2d man would love me, a short lesbian with no redeeming qualities

ur blog is nice or whatever idk what to say here ive looked at your past requests and they all say this at the end so

(PSA: this is my irl friend and we are always really mean to each other, so this matchup is not serious at all, and my other ones aren’t as stupid as this one so please don’t think i’m a bitchy cyberbully:)) hello slut. thanks for requesting ig :I. also you are a dirty liar almost everything in this explanation is fake as fuck (cough cough badonkadonks) anyways here’s your matchup.

generating matchup...

matchup: complete

i match you up with low quality background character!

you guys are a perfect fit this guy is so funny and sexy and swag and cool and everyone loves to be around him, but no one wants to date him because of his ugly tracksuit so he turns to you because you are the only person left that is lonely enough to want to be with him.

he loves caprisuns so he often goes to the store for hours and hours on end just choosing caprisuns but also to escape you because even though he is dating you he still doesn’t like being around you 24/7 because you are a weird feral gremlin who talks about concerning things, and he cannot hold a conversation with you without having to bathe in holy water.

when you say you are really cool, he pretends to agree but he really knows that you are unsexy and unswag and he just doesn’t want to tell you because no one should have to be told that they are unsexy and unswag that’s just too much pain for someone to handle, so he is waiting until he breaks up with you to tell you.

he likes me better than he likes you because i’m so much sexier and i have many redeeming qualities and i also can pretend to be mentally stable so he is just waiting for the perfect time to leave you and be with me but little does he know i will turn him down because anyone who liked you has no standards and if i am with them that would mean i am like you and i cannot handle that.

you say your one friend (me) is smelly, and he pretends to agree with you but he knows that you are the smelly one because you do not shower like a little dirty gremlin. whenever he touches you he has to wash his hands no less than 45 times and then boil his hands in purified fiji water to feel somewhat clean.

he is not afraid to tell you that you aren’t a big man because he doesn’t want you to be delusional and think that you are even close to being a bigger man than anyone- like your god complex his huge enough he has to make some effort to tone down your ego a little bit. (it doesn’t work you self absorbed bastard).

if you ever say babygirl when he is in a 70 foot radius of you, he will throw up his entire stomach and just collapse and twitch on the floor due to the pure disgustingness that you uttering the words “babygirl” holds. if you ever see him do that, he will just say it’s because he’s so in love with you that he has to puke out his organs to make room for his heart that is expanding due to all the love he has for you.

he thinks you are stupid because you can’t even spell very and are correctly, so he will always give you spelling books as a way to lowkey tell you to learn how to read, but you are so dumb that you think he’s just bad at giving gifts, and you just use them as chairs, while he is slowly getting more annoyed about how you don’t know how to read.

he really wants to leave you but he can’t because he sees that you are so lonely and that i, your incredibly sexy and swag friend, have to deal with you with no help from anyone else and he doesn’t want to put me through that pure torture, so every day he takes like 20 advil pills to be able to calm the growing headache that was caused by just being around you.

overall, you are greasy and stinky and feral and diseased and annoying and clingy and stupid and you are unable to ever be with a haikyuu character that isn’t a low quality background person, and even then the low quality person can barely stand you. in conclusion, you are the true stinky bastard man so go cry in your room :)

i hope you enjoyed!

[dawninlatin]

Haste

A Feysand Modern AU One Shot

Words: 4433

AO3 Link

Masterlist

Summary: Feyre comes back home after quitting college and breaking up with her boyfriend. During a night out, she starts seeing her friend Rhys in a new light. (Warning: There is some smut by the end)

The title comes from the song “Haste” by RY X, and if you wanna vibe, I suggest you go listen to it:)

A/N: Sorry for how long this note is, guess I had a lot to say, lol. This is actually the first fic I ever wrote, but I wanted to repost it, because I had only posted the AO3 link before, and wasn’t happy with that format. I would like to take this opportunity to thank all my amazing followers and readers!<3 

When reading through this fic, there were so many things I wanted to change, (like, why did I think it was a good idea to have every other word written in italics?? And I’m so sorry for the cheesy dialogue and suuuuper long paragraphs...), but I decided to keep it as it was, because it shows how far I’ve come from that day in February where I sat up half the night writing, thinking that no one would ever read this, because my English wasn’t good enough, and my writing wasn’t good enough. 

Yet I still posted it, and the response I got was more than I ever expected! This, along with all the other response I’ve gotten on all my other fics, has helped me so much with my writing, but more importantly, has helped me become the person I am today. So thank you so much, to everyone who takes the time to read, to everyone who likes, and reblogs, and leaves comments, and keep encouraging me! Thank you to all you wonderful people I have gotten to know on this app, tumblr has become a second home for me! From the bottom of my heart, I love y’all!<3<3<3

This was not how Feyre had pictured her night. Had she been the one to decide, it would consist of greasy pizza, a bottle of tequila and some crappy rom-com. Feyre had gotten as far as scrolling through Netflix in search for one, when her best friend Mor walked in the door of the apartment and declared that Feyre better get her ass of that couch, take a fucking shower and put on some decent clothing, because they were going out.

Feyre hadn’t felt like she was in the right position to protest; it was Mor’s couch she’d been occupying for the past week after all. Had it been a week already? she wondered. A week since Feyre had finally broken up with her asshole boyfriend Tamlin and then jumped on a bus to California, because the only person in the world she wanted to be with then was Mor. She had felt the need to share this victory with the only person that could always make her feel better. Of course, the high had ended as soon as she stood on Mor’s doorstep, where she had taken one look at her best friend and turned into a sobbing mess. That was about how she had spent the following week as well. She didn’t want to cry over the bastard, but he had been part of her life for the past two years, and she had loved him. Once.

So instead of spending the night on Mor's couch, wallowing in self pity, Feyre now found herself standing in the middle of a dance club crowded with drunk, sweaty people, playing way too loud music - the blinking lights making her dizzy. She had borrowed one of Mor’s dresses - and though this was considered modest in Mor’s eyes - she found herself constantly pulling at the black fabric, not comfortable with how much thigh it showed off.

Feyre scanned the room, trying to find her friend, and as she was about to declare the task impossible, she eyed a red dress and a head of blond curls. Mor was elbowing her way through the crowd, drinks in hand, accompanied by two men Feyre recognized. The tall, muscular one with shoulder-length, dark hair and a cocky smirk was Cassian, and the slightly shorter one with a shy smile was Azriel.

As they approached her, Cassian went in for a one-armed hug. «It’s good to see you Feyre!» He grinned at her, and she found herself grinning back despite her unhappy mood earlier. She really had missed these people.

«Hi Feyre, you look well!» Feyre looked up to see Azriel smiling at her, accompanied by an awkward wave. He was more of the quiet, observing type of guy, but that was exactly what Feyre liked so much about him. He was quiet, yes, but the silence was never uncomfortable.

«You as well, Azriel.» She smiled back at him, then turned towards Mor, who handed her a drink.

«Don’t look so shy Feyre. You look amazing tonight!» Mor winked at her, then gestured to the rest of the club. «You should have seen all the guys eyeing you when we walked in. Actually…if you hadn’t been my best friend, and straight-» she made a disappointed face at that, which made their whole group laugh, including Feyre, «-I totally would have slept with you.» Feyre laughed even more at that, but Mor was right. She felt good tonight. Sexy, even. She felt something she hadn’t felt in a long way. She was excited for what the night - the future - would bring.

«I might not wanna sleep with you, but I think that brunette at the bar wants to.» Feyre nodded her head towards the young woman ogling her friend.

«Hell yes!» Mor exclaimed. She put her arms around Feyre and Azriel’s shoulders. «Tonight, ladies and gentlemen, we’re gonna get laid!»

«Cheers to that!» Cassian laughed, lifting his drink. As Feyre sipped hers, she felt light, almost giddy, with excitement and joy. At the same moment, she noticed someone was missing from their small gathering. Rhys.

She couldn’t fathom how she hadn’t noticed before. Mor’s annoying cousin was difficult to ignore whenever he was present. The prick always teased, always came with innuendos, or witty remarks. He had the biggest ego Feyre had ever encountered. Still, Feyre found herself to be missing Rhysand’s snarky comments and their never-ending banter. Before she had time to stop herself, she spoke the sentence: «Hey guys, where’s Rhys?»

Cassian wiggled his eyebrows at her, but she chose to ignore him. «He’s coming later. Had to work overtime» Mor answered. Feyre nodded, before quickly switching the subject over to their plans for the rest of the summer.

-

As soon as they had some alcohol in their blood, Feyre and her small group of friends moved on to the dance floor. Feyre was jumping around, singing along to whatever song they were blasting, joking and laughing with Mor and Cassian, teasing Azriel for not wanting to join them. They looked like idiots, but they were happy idiots. She could feel the heavy bass in her whole body, along with her beating heart. She was so, so happy . Happier than all of last year combined. Hell, she hadn’t been this happy since high school, when she, Mor, Cassian, Azriel, even Rhys, had been together almost every day. Always laughing, joking. But that had been before Tamlin, and before she had been stupid enough to move halfway across the country for college.

Feyre scolded herself for thinking about Tamlin again. The point of tonight was to forget him. To have fun. And she was having fun, and she was happy. So happy that at any moment she could grow wings and disappear into the night. She had no worries. No worries of the home she had left behind, or college, or her ex-boyfriend, or what tomorrow would bring. She was here, now, and she felt fucking amazing.

Feyre heard Cassian greet someone, and turned just in time to meet a pair of shockingly blue eyes. Rhys. Her breath caught, her heart thundering in her chest, and she found herself not being able to look away. He held her gaze, refusing to be the first to break eye contact. Feyre didn’t know if it was the lights, the music, the alcohol, the warm summer night, still young and full of possibilities, or the feeling of finally being free, but it was as if she was seeing him for the first time.

Had he always been this handsome? she asked herself, taking in his lean, muscular form, his tight-fitting jeans, the white shirt opened just enough to show off the tattoos swirling across his chest. She stared at his sharp jawline, his soft lips, his eyes, so blue they were practically glowing, his dark, messy hair. Oh, how she wanted to run her fingers through his hair.

A cough from Mor made Feyre tear her eyes away at last. I must be drunker than I thought , she mused. This was Rhys she was thinking about. The man who annoyed her to no end. The man who was known for his many hook-ups and one night stands and flirts and just- argh.

«How nice of you to finally show up,» Cassian said as he threw an arm around Rhys’ shoulder and handed him a drink. Rhys made a comment that had Cassian roaring with laughter, but Feyre didn’t hear what it was, because Rhys was looking at her with such an intensity that it made her insides tingle. Stop it, she thought. You had a boyfriend just a week ago.

«Hey Feyre. It’s good to see you again.» Rhys smiled at her, but it wasn’t his usual cocky smirk. It almost looked a little sad. Feyre suddenly found the floor very interesting, not being able to keep herself from blushing or biting her lip. She could feel his eyes on her. Burning. Then Mor shouted «Who wants shots?», and the moment was over.

-

The night went on. They drank, they danced, they talked about college and hook-ups and high school. Feyre almost wanted to cry at the feeling of how familiar it all was. She had been afraid that her moving to Boston would change everything - and it had, for a little while - but she was back now, and everything was normal. Except for Rhys, maybe. Something had definitely changed between the two of them.

Gone was the teasing and never-ending banter. In its place was something brand new. They hadn’t said anything to one another except for pleasantries for the entirety of the evening, but Feyre caught him staring at her constantly, with this sad, longing look in his eyes. And to be honest, she hadn’t been able to keep her eyes off of him either.

Right now, they were all sitting at the bar, watching Cassian stick his tongue down the throat of some random blonde on the dance floor. Mor suddenly stood up, announcing she was gonna go try her luck with the woman she had been flirting with all night.

«Come on, Azriel. You’re gonna be my wingman.» His protest died on his lips as More pulled him after her.

All there was left, was Feyre and Rhys. Not able to meet each others eyes.

But Feyre was feeling brave this night. It might have been the alcohol, or the still-lingering high of having broken up with the asshole that had made her life miserable for the past year. She muttered a quiet «fuck it», downed her drink, stood up, and looked her friend straight in the eyes. «Do you wanna dance?»

Rhys’s face was lit up by a bright smile. «I thought you’d never ask, Feyre darling.» Her insides warmed at the familiar nickname, and she found herself smiling just as brightly. Rhys took her hand, leading her to the dance floor, where some old EDM shit was playing.

Feyre didn’t care about the bad music, or the bright lights, or the sweat coating her body. She was here with Rhys. His body was so close now, and she could smell his all-familiar scent of citrus and sea.

She lost track of how long they danced. None of them were any good at it, but they were laughing and having fun. Feyre felt 17 again, jumping around, sweaty and drunk, but happy. «God, I missed this!» she exclaimed, grinning at Rhys, just as the fast rhythms and heavy bass switched over to a slow ballad.

Hesitantly, Feyre glanced at Rhys, suddenly feeling shy and unsure. He raised his eyebrows in a silent question. She understood what he meant immediately, and nodded, biting her lip. Rhys stepped closer, and put his arms around her waist. She placed hers around his neck, swaying along with the music.

She looked at the man in front of her. Really looked at him this time. How had she not noticed before, how strikingly beautiful he was? His sharp angles, kissable lips, silky hair, the blue eyes she could get lost in if she stared for too long. Said eyes were taking in her just as intensely at the moment.

«You are so beautiful tonight, Feyre.» His voice was hoarse, laced with restraint. Feyre felt a longing, deep within herself. She wanted to tell him he was beautiful too, wanted to kiss him, wanted to cry, wanted to just leave, wanted to stay in his arms forever. She wanted to be his.  She did neither, couldn’t find the courage to do so.

Instead, she stepped closer, and pressed her forehead against his, feeling his strained breath against her lips. Everything around them disappeared. The world narrowing down to the two of them, together, forehead against forehead, in the midst of a warm night in June.

Then the song ended, and the moment was over. Feyre stepped back, but she continued to hold his gaze. Rhys looked towards the exit. «Come, I wanna show you something.» He grabbed her hand, and then he was leading her through the crowd. They walked past Mor, who muttered a «fucking finally!» that made them both chuckle.

Outside, they were surrounded by warm, summer air, a chill breeze running over their exposed skin. Rhys looked at Feyre with mischief in his eyes. Butterflies fluttered in her stomach.

«What exactly was it that you wanted to show me?» she asked, not being able to hide her curiosity.

«You’ll see, just trust me.» Rhys looked giddy with excitement. He was bouncing on his feet now. «Follow me, we don’t wanna miss it.» Then he started walking. Fast.

«Miss what?» Feyre shouted after him, but he didn’t answer. Rhys just kept on walking, and she struggled to keep up with him. «I have shorter legs than you, remember? And I’m currently in heals, which puts me at an unfair disadvantage.» He stopped a few steps ahead, an amused look on his face.

«We have to wait a few minutes now,» he announced, all serious. Feyre looked around where they were standing, a few blocks away from the club. The whole city was sleeping. The sight of the quiet, empty streets bewitching.

Then a bright, yellow bus stopped in front of them. Also empty. She followed Rhys onto it, confusion growing more and more. «The bus? Where exactly are we going?»

The puzzled look on Feyre's face made him chuckle. «I swear, the mystery will be worth it once we get there. Now, we could have walked, but then we would miss it.» He must have seen the question forming on her lips, because he raised a finger. «And no, I still won’t tell you what it is.»

She rolled her eyes and muttered a quiet «prick». The nickname made him laugh, and she laughed with him, because Feyre hadn’t called him that since high school. It had been way too long since they’d been together like this. Still, under all the joking and laughing, there was an unfamiliar tension that hadn’t been there before.

-

After only five minutes, Rhys announced that they had reached their destination. He stepped out onto the street, and led Feyre towards a beach. The sight in front of her was breathtaking. The dark waves crashing against the sand, the sky - the nearing dawn making it a deep pink - birds flying over their heads, and Rhys, who had taken off his shoes and started walking towards the ocean. Feyre followed him, slipping out of her heels. The moment she felt the familiar California sand under her toes again, she laughed with joy. A rich and warm sound she hadn’t made in forever.

Rhys, who was standing in the water now, looked up at her, the same bright smile on his face. He waved at her to hurry up, and she walked the final steps to him. The sea was warm, and the salty smell of it was amazing. It was home. She looked towards the horizon, where the sun barely had begun to rise. Then she looked up at Rhys again.

«The sunrise. That’s what you wanted to show me.»  Rhys only nodded, before looking ahead of them. Feyre took in the sight again, and she felt something she hadn’t felt in a long time. She wanted, no, she needed to paint.

Her thoughts were disturbed by Rhys, who was now sitting in the sand, jeans cuffed up to his knees. «Come sit with me, Feyre.» He patted the spot next to him.

Feyre stepped back and sat down, feeling the waves crash against her legs. She looked to Rhys, and said the only thing that could come to her mind with a playful smirk on her lips. «How did your dad take it when he found out his only son was gonna major in English, and not business?»

Rhys grimaced. «He was pissed at first, even threatened to write me out of his will, but he came around - eventually.» They chuckled at that, both knowing how angry Rhys’ father could get, but also how he always gave in when it came to his children. «How about you? How’s all the art stuff going?» Rhys asked, his eyebrows raised in question.

«Urgh,» Feyre cringed, «I dropped out in March, haven’t touched a paint brush since.» She should have been sad or ashamed when admitting that, but she felt good, knowing she had made the right choice. She had been miserable in Boston.

Rhys looked at her, concern lining his face. «That bad, huh?»

«What can I say? Boston sucked, and I would much rather be here, with you guys.» She grinned at him, and he grinned back.

«So you’re back for good now?» Feyre only nodded, turning back towards the rising sun.

The sight in front of her was hypnotizing. «I didn’t realize how much I’ve really missed home.» The words were out before she managed to think. Rhys only hummed quietly beside her. Seemingly lost in his own thoughts. Feyre turned towards him. His eyes were closed, a small smile on his lips. «What’s on your mind?» she wondered out loud.

Rhys opened his eyes then, and looked at her. «A thought for thought?» he suggested. She smiled at the reminder of the little game they used to play when they were younger. «I can begin,» he continued.

He looked towards the horizon again, taking a deep breath. «I’m thinking that when I walked into the club tonight, I was so happy to see you, because you were so happy. You were dancing and laughing and I thought that finally we had gotten our Feyre back. After you left for Boston, and after you met him, it was as if you disappeared.» Feyre tried to swallow the lump in her throat. He sounded wounded, almost. Did he really care about her that much?

«You visited, of course, but it was like a stranger had replaced you. You were a shell of who you once used to be. You stopped laughing, stopped making inappropriate jokes, and I missed you. God, I missed you so much.» Feyre felt like she might cry at his words, but she didn’t. All she did was stare ahead, and take his hand. She squeezed it, encouraging him to continue. He squeezed back.

«As I said, when I saw you tonight, I was sure we had gotten the old Feyre back. Mor told me what had happened in Boston - why you were back - and I was sure that everything would return to normal between us.» He took a break, clearly anxious of saying what was next.

«But everything isn’t back to normal. Something has changed. I can feel it, and I think you can too.» He looked at her now, that intense longing once again in his eyes. She met his gaze, and suddenly felt brave enough to say:

«I can feel the change too, yes, but I think it’s a good change.» Then she leaned in, and kissed him.

Rhys went completely still at first, and Feyre was afraid that she had misunderstood their conversation. Then he seemed to realize what was happening. He put one arm around her waist, the other tangling in her hair, pulling her closer and deepening the kiss.

His lips tasted salty, she thought, but sweet at the same time. She could get drunk on him alone. Feyre was breathless, and dizzy, but she decided this was the best feeling in the world.

She was kissing Rhys.

He pressed his tongue against her lips, and she opened up for him, moaning at the sensation. She put her hands in his hair, slightly pulling at it. The silky strands feeling soft in her fingers.

Kissing Rhys was everything, but at the same time it was not enough. She needed more. Needed to be closer, needed to feel more of him. She pulled away slightly, breathless, heart thundering, blood rushing in her ears. Rhys looked at her, just as breathless, a hungry gleam in his eyes. «How far is it to your place?» He only smirked in answer.

Rhys stood up, picking Feyre up with him. She laughed as he almost dropped her, then she wrapped her legs around his waist. He didn’t walk far before they reached a small house. Rhys put her down, pulled a pair of keys out of his pocket, and unlocked the door.

Feyre marveled at the place as they stepped inside. It was small, but it was stunning. Large glass windows facing the ocean, green plants covering every available surface, and several over-filled bookshelves. She turned to look at Rhys, who had stopped in the doorway, staring at her taking in his place, surprise clearly written on her face. She took a step towards him. Then another. And another, until their mouths crashed together again.

Rhys moved his lips over her jaw, down her throat, her neck. Feyre moaned, struggling to get his shirt off fast enough, both minds clouded with lust and the haste to be as close together as possible. Skin to skin.

She finally managed to open the last button, pulling off the fabric. Feyre took in his muscled, tan chest and the many tattoos covering it. She leaned forward, and pressed her lips to the spot right above his heart. She could feel it hammering beneath his skin. She moved upwards, ghosting them over his collarbone, his neck, his throat, his jawline, then finally his lip.

Rhys grabbed her face, kissing her with such an intensity it made her dizzy. She was about to start fumbling with his belt when Rhys pulled away. «Are you sure you want this?» he asked, all out of breath, voice cracking, and Feyre would have thought his consideration and worry to be cute, had she not been so desperate to press her naked body against his. So she only nodded, and stepped back to pull her dress over her head. She wasn’t wearing a bra.

That seemed to be the end of Rhys' restraint. He took a step towards her, grabbed her under her thighs, and hoisted her up so she was sitting with her legs around his waist. Feyre moaned at the feeling of him pressing against her, hard and ready, and she felt a warm throbbing between her own legs.

Feyre let out a breathy «why the hell do you still have pants on?» that made Rhys chuckle. She felt the sound moving through his whole body. He walked across the room, laid her down on the bed and quickly got rid of his pants. Feyre almost drooled at the sight of his large cock. She reached out a hand and stroked him through the thin fabric of his boxers. Rhys groaned at the feeling, and leaned over her, placing his mouth on one of her nipples.

It felt exquisite. Rhys, his wandering hands, her body tingling with sensation, his hot mouth on her skin. She needed more, more, more. Feyre pulled his cock free, and he kicked of his underwear. One of his hands reached the band of her own panties, a finger dipping into her core, then slowly circling her clit.

It was too much and not enough and she needed more. Rhys slid off her underwear, and all of a sudden there was nothing between them. «Do you have a condom?» Feyre didn’t know how she managed to form words at this point, but he reached behind her and grabbed one. Feyre took it and rolled it on him, while his mouth explored every inch of her breasts, and his hand slowly stroked the bundle of nerves at the apex of her thighs.

Feyre needed him inside her, now. She lined his cock up with her entrance, then she looked him in the eyes. He took her hint, slowly, oh so slowly, pushing himself in, not breaking eye contact.

Feyre moaned at the feeling of him filling her, widening her. He was thick and warm and it felt amazing. She pulled his mouth to hers, and he pressed his tongue inside her, filling her in two places. He pulled out slightly, then pushed in to the hilt this time. Rhys groaned at the sensation, his hand still drawing circles over her clit.

It felt so good, she was seeing stars. The wave inside her rising and rising with no end as Rhys picked up his pace, slamming to the hilt and hitting that magic spot every. damn. time.

Words like more or faster or deeper filled the warm air around them. Rhys buried his head between her shoulder and neck, moaning her name. Feyre felt her pussy clench around him, nearing that sweet, sweet edge. «Rhys, I need to…»

He seemed to understand what she meant, because he went even faster, fingers pressing down against her clit, and fuck it felt so good! His eyes met her eyes, his forehead pressed against her forehead, and she felt his words as a breath against her lips. «Come, Feyre.»

Those words pushed her over the edge immediately, wave crashing over her like nothing ever had before. It lasted a lifetime. That sweet, unending pleasure. She clenched around him again and again, until he started losing control, losing rhythm, and at last he came with her, groaning.

When it was over, the world around them went quiet. The sun was shining through the curtains, a new day beginning, Rhys collapsed on top of Feyre, stroking her disheveled hair away from her face. «That was…» she didn’t know how to end that sentence. She wanted to stay here with him forever. Just the two of them. Skin to skin.

Rhys looked at her, amusement coloring his face. «Intense?» he suggested. Feyre chuckled, tapping her fingers against his chest. He pulled out, turned on his back, taking her with him, so that she lay on his chest, ear placed right over his heart.

«I was gonna go with best sex of my life, but intense works too I guess.» He laughed at that. A warm, loud laughter that she could feel in her whole body. He kissed the top of her head, and pulled a blanked over them.

As Feyre lay there, feeling Rhys draw slow circles on her back, listening to the waves, letting the steady beat of his heart and the sound of his even breaths lull her to sleep, she knew that nothing would ever be the same after this night. She felt almost electric with excitement over what the rest of the summer would bring. One thing she was sure of, Rhys would be part of it.

[opinionated810]

can you do a what 00+99 line on how would they like their partner to be during sex? with many details please XD ps- you are my favorite writer on tumblr and i love the way you put effort on your texts. (Excuse my english, I’m from india)

Thank you so much!  You’re very sweet! I’m so sorry it took so long to get to this post. I hope you like it! 💖

BTW - your English is phenomenal!  

Lucas: switch; some previous experience

Lucas is a true switch - he loves being both top and bottom, sub and dom. Because of that, he needs someone who is also a true switch. He has a very strong sexual appetite, but he is also super soft. His partner would need to be able to keep up with all his sexual moods. I think he loves when you take charge in the bedroom, but if you get too carried away he wouldn’t hesitate to take back all the control from you. His favorite position would be something like cowgirl, where he could see as much of you as possible. He also really loves mirror sex so he can see all of you, but also all of him (he does have a bit of an ego and knows he’s hot).

Mark: sub-leaning switch; no previous experience

For now, I see Mark as a sub-leaning switch, but with some more sexual experience I think that may change a bit. He would be nervous about doing something you didn’t want or like so he would willingly take a backseat and let you take control. He’s so caring and careful that I think he would be very vocal in asking you what you liked and didn’t like. He isn’t overly perceptive so he needs someone to tell him explicitly what they like. I do think that he can dom every once in a while - once he’s comfortable enough with you. He’s someone who needs to be in a committed, loving, trusting relationship in order to have sex. His favorite position would anything that allows lots of eye contact - something that is very important to him. I can see him really enjoying traditional missionary.

Xiaojun: switch; a bit of previous experience

I’ve said before that Xiaojun is the member that I feel like I know the least, and that’s particularly true when talking about sex. However, I do think he’s a boob man for sure - and he goes for size: the bigger the better. I think he would love motor-boating you and is possibly into titty fucking. He’s slightly sub, but switches often when the mood strikes him or you. He needs a s/o who is ok with him exploring some of his fantasies and is comfortable with their body (particularly their breasts). I see Xiaojun as someone who prefers a partner who leads things, even though I think he’s more comfortable being on top. I actually think he’s someone who would prefer a partner who has a bit of previous sexual experience.

Hendery: dom; a bit of previous experience

I think Hendery is a dom, but slightly more on the soft-dom side. He loves being the top and needs someone who is comfortable bottoming and being a soft-sub. In the moment, Hendery is quite aggressive and passionate (i.e. likes it a bit rough), but is super cuddly and soft afterwards. He would be excellent at aftercare. He also really enjoys foreplay - especially giving and receiving oral. Overall, I think Hendery is a very sensual person who needs a partner who isn’t afraid to express and explore their own sensuality with him. While he doesn’t necessarily need someone with previous sexual experience, I think he would prefer someone who is open to new experiences and isn’t afraid to show the sexual side of their personality - in and out of the bedroom.

Renjun: dom-leaning switch; no previous experience

To me, Renjun is quite interesting in this situation. He can be very sassy and bossy outside the bedroom, so I think that could easily translate inside the bedroom. However, he’s also super soft and a bit shy, so I think he also needs someone who can teach and guide him sexually. He wants to be (and thinks he is) a dom, but I actually think he’s more of a switch. He needs a partner who can take his bossiness (and who can make him think he’s in charge - even if he really isn’t), but can also be very tender and guiding. I think Renjun is another member who needs some kind of emotional connection with his partner - though not to the extent that I think Mark does. Renjun needs a partner who will tell him what they like and what they don’t like in order for him to be comfortable in bed. I previously put Renjun as an ass man, but I’m starting to think that he’s more of a boob guy - but I don’t think he necessarily likes really big boobs. Instead, I think he likes well-shaped, perky breasts.

Jeno: sub-leaning switch; no previous experience

A lot of people on Tumblr see Jeno as this hard dom, but I just don’t see it. Yes, he could fuck you hard, but for the most part, he’s super soft and shy and I think he’s more of a sub than a dom. Sexually, he needs a partner who isn’t afraid to initiate things. Perhaps later into a relationship he would be more comfortable leading things, but initially, Jeno would be hesitant and a bit too shy. I do see him as the “strong silent” type of guy, so he’s more than capable of fucking you silly when you’re under him, but that would only happen occasionally. He prefers when you’re on top and controlling everything - that way he can be sure it’s what you want and he can learn from you. He really loves when you wear lingerie; pretty or sexy - it doesn’t matter to him as long as you wear it while having sex.

Haechan: switch; no previous experience

Haechan has three sides in bed: the first is super fun and filled with laughter, the second is very gentle and intimate, and the third is a bit kinky. Haechan loves to laugh and have a good time, so I think sex with him would be the same. Someone too serious in bed would be a turn-off for him because he thinks sex should be fun sometimes. But Haechan also craves affection and intimacy, so I can see sex with him being very intimate - lots of touching and foreplay where you worship each other’s bodies. That’s one of his kinks - giving and receiving praise and body worship. He loves both boobs and ass, but I think he really enjoys titty fucking on occasion. Because of all this, Haechan needs a partner who is as affectionate as he is, as well as someone who likes to play a bit in bed.

Jaemin: switch; a bit of previous experience

Like Haechan, Jaemin is both an ass and boob man - he just enjoys women and their bodies (not in a creepy way - he simply admires the female mind and body and everything they’re capable of). He’s another member who needs a fairly strong emotional connection in order to have sex. Eye contact is very important to him because it helps build trust and intimacy. So someone who is confident enough to look him in the eye during sex is crucial. Jaemin is quite sensual (he’s attuned to all five of his senses) and likes as many of them to be stimulated at once as possible. Because of this, I think he really enjoys seated sex where you’re facing each other so that you can look into each other’s eyes, as well as touch each other. In this position, he would love it when you run your hands through his hair and moan in his ear.

Yangyang: switch; no previous experience

yangyang needs a sexual partner who can keep up with all his randomness. He’s another true switch who, depending on his mood in the moment, can fuck you really hard and fast or be really slow and gentle. In fact, he wouldn’t hesitate to go back and forth (from fast to slow, from hard to gentle, from top to bottom) multiple times during one session. He’s an ass man, so one of his favorite positions is reverse cowgirl, where he can watch his cock enter you. I don’t think he has any peculiar kinks, but he likes changing things up so he’s never bored. Because of this, he needs a partner who is the same - someone who isn’t afraid to switch things up. For your first time, Yangyang would need someone who would initiate things. He’d want to be sure you were ready for sex and would need you to show him that you’re ready.