#Eve moneypenny

[lithiumseven]

Part II, Part I

[teddybarebones]

Anyone done this one yet?

[bluebellofbakerstreet]

Eve Moneypenny

[tinyglassearl]

Au where everyone thought Mycroft and Albert were banging when they were actually not. Poor Albert would  constantly get slut-shamed when he’s still a full blown virgin. 

Everyday would basically be: 

Albert, who was up all night searching through old files for a MI6 mission: God, my knees are killing me. 

Moran: Yeah I bet your throat is too. Slut.

Albert: ?

...........................

Albert: This is the last time I am EVER riding a horse. 

Moneypenny: That’s not a very nice name to call the Director. 

Albert: ???

.......................

Albert, who’s covered in mosquito bites after a field mission: No tea for me. I’m not very thirsty. 

Jack: Sure you aren’t. I sincerely hope he used protection. 

Albert, remembering Mycroft forgot the bug repellant: Um. We forgot?

Jack:

Jack: Dear God. 

.......................

Albert, covered in bruises because he tried and failed miserably at a surprise attack on Mycroft: Ow. OW! That bastard... he didn’t have to be so rough on me. 

Louis:

Louis: I am going to kill him.

......................

Bonus! 3 years later at the reunion dinner. 

Albert:.... to be fair, it wasn’t too lonely. Mycroft kept me busy through his lovely letters. :D

William: That sounds wonderful, brother!

William, internally: *Lord Almighty, they had sex in prison*

....................

And later when Mycroft and Albert finally got together, everyone would be like “We KNOW”, “Like it wasn’t obvious”

confusing the hell out of Mycal as they only just banged 2 hrs ago.

[dontcxckitup]

Incorrect MI6 quotes 68/??

[ageofgeek]

Bond falls victim to what I am now calling "Steve Rogers Syndrome," where a main character throws away his found family (which the audience has become much more attached to) in favor of a bland, boring, nuclear/heterosexual life. Just because Bond doesn't get his "happy ending" doesn't mean that he doesn't fall into this trope.

I think a lot of people would agree with me when I say that Bond & Madeline have no chemistry. They had no chemistry in Spectre and they continue to have none in NTTD. And yet, we're supposed to care about their relationship because 1) the narrative (i.e. Bond) tells us, instead of shows us, that he loves her, and 2) there is a child (which the narrative also tells us that we should care about).

But the truth is that Bond doesn't trust Madeline. Not really. The second he's attacked by Spectre, he immediately blames her and doesn't even question if he's wrong (and she doesn't really try to convince him otherwise). Now, you may chalk this up to Bond not trusting anybody, but here's where we get to the found family: because he does trust his MI6 family, implicitly, immediately.

He trusts Eve enough to tell her about the scientist, Feliks, what happened in Cuba, etc., and to ask for her help. He trusts Q so much that he gives him the flashdrive he recovered in Cuba, he stays with Q in his apt while he's in London, he places his life in Q's hands multiple times throughout Skyfall, Spectre, and NTTD. He trusts Mallory - even after knowing his shadiness with Herakles, he still trusts him enough to go back under his command. He even trusts Nomi after only a few days of meeting her - enough to trust her to have his back on the island, enough to trust her with Madeline and his child.

So the fact that Bond doesn't trust Madeline is a huge, huge red flag. To me, the "trilogy" of Skyfall, Spectre, and NTTD were all about establishing Bond's support system and family within MI6. In Casino Royale and QoS, he really only had M, and no other connections to MI6 beyond her. But starting with Skyfall, he begins to build a support network of people he does trust in MI6, and the audience begins to trust them (and love them) along with Bond.

This simply doesn't apply to Madeline, because Bond doesn't trust her, and so the audience is never shown why we should trust her or love her.

[luminiferocity]

So an unfortunate blur means if you go backwards through NTTD screenshots, it tells a short story of Q finally standing up to Bond's BS.

Bond: Hello, Q; do me a favour?

Q: Actually, Bond... *throws USB drive on the ground* ...I'd rather not

Moneypenny and Bond: 😯 😐

[pommedepersephone]

never did run smooth for Eve Moneypenny...

Act 2: I wooed thee with my sword, And won thy love doing thee injuries is now up!

Bond was back. Because of course he was. And Eve was doing her best to be magnanimous about it all. After all, it wasn't his fault that the cult-like hero worship of Bond, James Bond had led to her becoming something of a social pariah after she shot him. She supposed he probably didn’t enjoy being shot either, so perhaps she shouldn’t be too upset.

@anyawen I made myself find a stopping point... this is however about to become an ongoing series. Because I realized Eve has more to say, and Q has more to snark.

This was inspired by the prompt: Write anything. The title of your fic must be ‘never did run smooth’

[sheriiam]

Team Moriarty right before William's wedding,

Sebastian fixing his bow tie in front of the mirror: Well, got to go, I've a wedding to attend.

Bond, sitting up straight: Wait. I've a wedding to attend too!

Herder, holding a wedding card in hand: Oh, uh, me too?

Fred, rushing in the room while putting his coat on: Let's get going, it's already late.

Moneypenny, finishing her makeup: Um, people... I think we ALL have weddings to attend.

Fred, in disbelief: Are you serious? Weddings? You all even forgot WHO is getting married?

Jack, literally jumping down the stairs with his coat in his hand: GOD I FORGOT I HAVE TO WALK HIM DOWN THE AISLE!

[Louis was the only one who was there on time. Well, Albert too... But he was busy sipping wine.]

[double-0h-no]

Order's Up

Prompt fill from the collab table for @meadowcastiel Thank you so much, and you've brought this onto yourself, and I love you, and all that.

on ao3

The local coffee shop closing down for renovation might be the biggest crisis the admin office has faced of yet.

Eve Moneypenny was late.

Not that he was bothered by her tardiness, not at all. It just stood out in comparison to her usual punctuality, and maybe he worried a bit about her even if she was only two minutes running behind.

At four minutes past eight, she entered his office without knocking and an apologetic expression on her face.

"Good morning. Pardon my delay, I already had to deal with a major inconvenience this morning that might immobilise at least half of admin," she said, a tone of sardonic foreboding in her voice, and he raised his eyebrows expectantly.

"Our usual coffee place is closed for two weeks due to renovation."

Mallory, fortunately and unfortunately, was a practical man. So when he heard "this place is closed down for a while" he heard "we have to get our coffee from a different spot". He also knew how very habit-driven and opinionated some of his staff was.

"That does indeed sound concerning. Does that mean no coffee this morning?"

She grimaced somewhat apologetically. "I couldn't go quite that far, but..."

With something akin to embarrassment, she produced two Starbucks paper cups.

"I see the dilemma."

"It's the only other place to get coffee on the block. It's... not the best solution." He nodded in deep consideration.

"Do you think the department will make it through two weeks?"

Eve shrugged. "Either that, or they'll have to start bringing their coffee from home or another place on their way in to work. Will you survive?"

If he was honest, he didn't have a lot of standards concerning his coffee. He'd like to blame it on his time with the military, but he knew enough people who'd come from the same tracks and turned into right snobs after all. And yet...

"Go get your tablet, Eve, and I'll give you my opinion after we went over our daily schedule."

She nodded, put down the two paper cups, and returned just a minute later with her usual assortment of files, notebook, and tablet.

After the meeting he didn't much remember the taste of the coffee anymore, but it was empty, which was good enough for him. Eve looked decidedly less than happy.

"You could pick it up at a different spot. Or only get one for yourself, I'll make do with the canteen coffee for a week."

Her expression turned grim at his fighting words. "Nobody should ever go through two weeks of canteen coffee, not even Anna." Which said a lot, actually. Eve was not shy to wish the bubonic plague on her counterpart in accounting. "There's only a Costa on my way here, apart from that, and I'd rather have my coffee hot than pick it up at the beginning of the road. Costa's not much better than Starbucks."

Mallory gave her a faint smile. "Well, it's all on us, really."

"Sir?"

"We probably financed their renovation." At that, Eve had to grin, too, and at least left his office with a warm smile. And nothing was more important than to keep his secretary in a good mood.

He only noticed it two days later, when he was stuck in a horrible meeting online that stretched way longer than it should. In his boredom, he had moved on to reading the label on his paper cup, when something struck him as... faintly concerning. It was the entered name printed on the label taped to his cup. It simply read 'M'.

It struck him as ludicrous. For one, his designation was meant exactly for that - to keep his name hidden in operations - but a trip to Starbucks could hardly be called that. And Eve wouldn't just give it away on a whim, either. If she was asked for his name, she either gave a random one, or his last name. It wasn't as if it was a mystery. He dealt with too many people to only be known under his designated letter, had shaken too many hands to not be known by the time he'd become M. It was more of an honorary thing for him, really.

And now it was printed on his Starbucks paper cup.

Curious.

The mention of his name called his attention back to his screen and he did his best to forget about the incident altogether for the rest of the day.

When he inspected his paper cup the next day, the name only said "-", and that was that.

The following day, they were back to M. The day after, too. On Friday, he investigated Moneypenny's cup, too, and found an M printed on it as well as on his.

Could it be that they used her initial letter? Moneypenny  was a rather long name to spell out, after all, and maybe - Well, maybe he was just being paranoid. The most likely solution, actually. Then again, while nobody had yet died of being too cautious, the opposite certainly rang true.

"Something wrong with the coffee, sir? Apart from the obvious, I mean."

"I was just wondering about the label," he admitted, then trashed the empty cup.

"The label?"

"The name section always either says nothing, or there's a single M in it. It surprised me a bit when I first saw it, but I assume it's just a shortcut for your name."

Now, Eve furrowed her brows, too. "I never give my name. They almost know my order by heart now, and I'm the only person in there in the mornings who orders for her entire office. Rather memorable on its own."

It was an odd comfort, to see that she was immediately as suspicious as he'd been. If it was unhealthy paranoia, at least he wasn't sinking with that ship all on his own.

"I'm sure it's nothing," he now tried to reassure her. "Was there anything else you need signed for that grant?"

And back to business it was.

The next morning, Eve came into his room, broad smile on her face and two cups of Starbucks coffee in her hands, and enthusiastically took a seat in front of his desk, presenting him with his customary cup.

"I've figured it out."

He raised his eyebrows expectantly. "With the good mood you're in, I thought we were back to our usual coffee."

"No, but it's Friday, so this is the last concoction of that variety the both of us have to endure. And I solved the mystery of the M on our orders. It's a typo."

How could a single letter be a typo? Apparently, his expression already spoke volumes, because Eve continued triumphantly: "On the keyboard of their system, the M is right next to the dash. Usually, they don’t enter a name for the customer in the system, so they fill in the spot with a dash, because it has to be filled somehow. Now, if you rush through the process because things are busy and digital systems always take too long to process anyway, you occasionally hit the key next to the dash. With a frightening regularity, I might say.

"And that's how we all ended up with orders for M." A smug smile decorated her face while Mallory still couldn't fully comprehend the banality of it all.

"How did you figure it out?"

Eve shrugged nonchalantly. "I asked. Said that both my and my boss's name started with an M and it creeps us out a bit. Cashier started laughing and explained it to me while making our drinks. So no big conspiracy, for once. And from Monday on we'll be back to our usual order."

With a broad smile on her face, she left his office again and he could hear her greet Tanner before the door closed.

A typo. If all government mysteries could be solved that easily.

[tales-of-whales]

a heart in port (4734 words) by talesofwhales Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: James Bond (Craig Movies) Rating: Explicit Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings Relationships: Eve Moneypenny/Q Characters: Q (James Bond), Eve Moneypenny, Bill Tanner, Bill Tanner's Wife, Bill Tanner's Daughters Additional Tags: Found Family, Eve is with Tanners, Past Child Abuse, 007 MI6 Cafe Fest 2024, Prompt Fill Summary: Q and Eve knew each other long before any of them made it into MI6. Q helped her out then. He'd never expected she'd have a chance to return the favour.

Not in my best shape today (cried a lot again), so lazy to make a pretty picture and just leave it here.

It's the fill of the anon prompt about Eve and Q being foster siblings in the past.

[lithiumseven]

Part I, Part II

[teddybarebones]

[bluebellofbakerstreet]

Inspired by @anyawen's Drabble #25: Score. Scavenger hunt item #41.

[dontcxckitup]

Ralph Fiennes No Time To Die

[an-entity-i-think]

You know what it really genuinely annoys me when I'm reading fic and they girlbossify every woman ever. "The boys are idiot messes but the girls have never done anything wrong ever in their lives <3" makes me scream like why are you doing this???? They are ALL idiots!!!! Make her an idiot too!!! Woman aren't perfect!!! Men aren't idiots all the time!!! I'm not perfect and I'd like to be able to connect with a female character but you keep writing them like they are omniscient perfect at everything beings!!!! FNIESJHSHSDB AHHHH